1 00:00:01,669 --> 00:00:02,736 [knock on door] 2 00:00:02,770 --> 00:00:04,738 - LESLIE, CAN I RUN SOMETHING BY YOU REALLY QUICK? 3 00:00:04,772 --> 00:00:05,773 - SURE. I LOVE HAVING THINGS RUN BY ME. 4 00:00:05,806 --> 00:00:07,708 - I FEEL LIKE YOU'RE BEING SARCASTIC RIGHT NOW. 5 00:00:07,741 --> 00:00:09,643 - NO, NO. I'M NOT. I GENUINELY LOVE IT. 6 00:00:09,677 --> 00:00:11,312 RUN IT BY ME. GO AHEAD. GO GO GO. 7 00:00:11,345 --> 00:00:12,613 - OKAY, SO I'VE BEEN A LITTLE WORRIED 8 00:00:12,646 --> 00:00:14,182 THAT ANN MAYBE THINKS THAT OUR RELATIONSHIP 9 00:00:14,215 --> 00:00:16,184 ISN'T MOVING FORWARD FAST ENOUGH. 10 00:00:16,217 --> 00:00:19,753 AND SO I'M WONDERING IF MAYBE I SHOULD ASK HER 11 00:00:19,787 --> 00:00:22,256 IF SHE WOULD LIKE TO MOVE IN WITH ME. 12 00:00:22,290 --> 00:00:24,458 GOOD IDEA? BAD IDEA? YOU TELL ME. 13 00:00:24,492 --> 00:00:26,160 - WELL, I WOULD SAY THAT SOME WOMEN 14 00:00:26,194 --> 00:00:27,661 WON'T CONSIDER MOVING IN WITH SOMEONE 15 00:00:27,695 --> 00:00:29,297 UNLESS THEY THINK MARRIAGE IS IN THE FUTURE, 16 00:00:29,330 --> 00:00:34,302 WHICH I KNOW FOR YOU IS-- - I INTEND TO MARRY HER. 17 00:00:34,335 --> 00:00:35,536 - FOR REALSKIES? 18 00:00:35,569 --> 00:00:37,738 I'M NOT REALLY QUITE SURE HOW I FEEL. 19 00:00:37,771 --> 00:00:40,441 UM, I--IT-- IT'S A LITTLE WEIRD. 20 00:00:40,474 --> 00:00:42,243 I MEAN, I'M HAPPY FOR THEM. THEY'RE MY FRIENDS. 21 00:00:42,276 --> 00:00:43,444 IT MAKES ME A LITTLE NAUSEOUS. 22 00:00:43,477 --> 00:00:47,348 IF I COULD JUST SUM IT UP IN ONE WORD, IT WOULD BE, UM... 23 00:00:47,381 --> 00:00:49,183 [gasps] 24 00:00:49,217 --> 00:00:54,222 OHHHHHHHHHHHH. 25 00:00:56,724 --> 00:00:59,693 [triumphant music] 26 00:00:59,727 --> 00:01:07,801 * 27 00:01:17,478 --> 00:01:23,351 [phone rings] - PARKS AND REC. 28 00:01:23,384 --> 00:01:26,220 CONFIRMING WHAT? 29 00:01:26,254 --> 00:01:31,359 THAT'S NOT POSSIBLE. 30 00:01:31,392 --> 00:01:33,427 OH, NO. 31 00:01:33,461 --> 00:01:35,729 HEY. GOOD MORNING. 32 00:01:35,763 --> 00:01:37,831 - WHY ARE THERE SIX PEOPLE OUTSIDE WHO SAY 33 00:01:37,865 --> 00:01:39,700 THEY'RE WAITING TO MEET WITH ME? 34 00:01:39,733 --> 00:01:42,170 - SO YOU KNOW HOW YOU LOVE ME BECAUSE YOU HAVEN'T HAD 35 00:01:42,203 --> 00:01:44,838 A SINGLE MEETING WITH ANYONE SINCE I BECAME YOUR ASSISTANT? 36 00:01:44,872 --> 00:01:47,741 THAT'S BECAUSE EVERY TIME SOMEONE CALLS 37 00:01:47,775 --> 00:01:49,243 AND REQUESTS A MEETING WITH YOU, 38 00:01:49,277 --> 00:01:51,845 I ALWAYS SCHEDULE IT FOR MARCH 31ST. 39 00:01:51,879 --> 00:01:53,314 - WHY? 40 00:01:53,347 --> 00:01:55,449 - BECAUSE I DIDN'T THINK MARCH 31ST EXISTED. 41 00:01:55,483 --> 00:01:59,420 * 30 DAYS HAS SEPTEMBER, APRIL, MARCH, AND NOVEMBER * 42 00:01:59,453 --> 00:02:02,290 - JUNE AND NOVEMBER. 43 00:02:02,323 --> 00:02:04,425 TODAY IS MARCH 31ST. 44 00:02:04,458 --> 00:02:05,659 - I KNOW. 45 00:02:05,693 --> 00:02:08,596 - SO THEN HOW MANY MEETINGS DO I HAVE TODAY? 46 00:02:08,629 --> 00:02:11,899 - 93. - [strangled groan] OKAY. 47 00:02:11,932 --> 00:02:15,269 OKAY. WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO. 48 00:02:15,303 --> 00:02:16,504 - RIGHT. 49 00:02:16,537 --> 00:02:19,540 - TO ME, THIS SITUATION IS A BLOOD-SOAKED, 50 00:02:19,573 --> 00:02:22,210 NIGHTMARISH HELLSCAPE. 51 00:02:22,243 --> 00:02:24,845 HOWEVER, TO LESLIE KNOPE... - OH, HOW FUN. 52 00:02:24,878 --> 00:02:26,214 - YAY. 53 00:02:26,247 --> 00:02:27,681 - WHY DON'T YOU TAKE AS MANY AS YOU CAN 54 00:02:27,715 --> 00:02:28,682 AND I'LL COVER THE REST? 55 00:02:28,716 --> 00:02:29,750 - I HAVE A BETTER IDEA. 56 00:02:29,783 --> 00:02:32,353 WHY DON'T I TRY TO RUSTLE UP SEVEN MORE MEETINGS 57 00:02:32,386 --> 00:02:33,521 'CAUSE I THINK IT WOULD BE COOLER 58 00:02:33,554 --> 00:02:34,788 IF THERE WERE AN EVEN 100. 59 00:02:34,822 --> 00:02:36,457 - JUST--WHY DON'T WE JUST STICK TO THESE 93 60 00:02:36,490 --> 00:02:37,625 AND SEE HOW IT GOES. 61 00:02:37,658 --> 00:02:38,792 - YEAH, OKAY. 62 00:02:38,826 --> 00:02:40,461 THIS IS THE PERFECT DISTRACTION FOR ME. 63 00:02:40,494 --> 00:02:41,895 OKAY, SO I HAVE EVERYTHING I NEED, RIGHT? 64 00:02:41,929 --> 00:02:45,199 I HAVE A FRESH CUP OF COFFEE, COMFY, FUR-LINED BOOTS. 65 00:02:45,233 --> 00:02:47,268 - I'M GONNA NEED THOSE BOOTS BACK BY THE END OF THE DAY. 66 00:02:47,301 --> 00:02:48,369 - YEAH, NO PROBLEM. 67 00:02:48,402 --> 00:02:50,271 THEY'RE ACTUALLY A LITTLE NARROW FOR ME. 68 00:02:50,304 --> 00:02:51,772 - LESLIE, HERE'S A GUY. 69 00:02:51,805 --> 00:02:53,774 - HI, I'M LESLIE KNOPE, DEPUTY DIRECTOR. 70 00:02:53,807 --> 00:02:55,843 - BILL HAGGARDY, PAWNEE HISTORICAL SOCIETY. 71 00:02:55,876 --> 00:02:57,845 I'M SUPPOSED TO BE MEETING WITH RON SWANSON. 72 00:02:57,878 --> 00:02:59,747 - I UNDERSTAND THAT. HE'S TIED UP RIGHT NOW. 73 00:02:59,780 --> 00:03:01,249 - WHAT A SHOCKER. 74 00:03:01,282 --> 00:03:02,850 I'VE BEEN TRYING TO MEET WITH HIM THREE MONTHS 75 00:03:02,883 --> 00:03:03,884 AND NOW HE'S NOT AVAILABLE. 76 00:03:03,917 --> 00:03:05,353 IT'S PROBABLY TOO LATE NOW, 77 00:03:05,386 --> 00:03:07,388 BUT, UH, SOME RICH WOMAN, JESSICA WICKS, 78 00:03:07,421 --> 00:03:09,790 HAS RENTED OUT TURNBILL MANSION FOR A PARTY 79 00:03:09,823 --> 00:03:11,692 AND SHE'S MAKING ALTERATIONS. 80 00:03:11,725 --> 00:03:13,327 - "ALTERATIONS"? 81 00:03:13,361 --> 00:03:14,828 TURNBILL MANSION IS ONE OF THE MOST BELOVED 82 00:03:14,862 --> 00:03:16,830 HISTORICAL SITES IN PAWNEE. 83 00:03:16,864 --> 00:03:20,834 IN 1867, THE PROGRESSIVE REVEREND TURNBILL 84 00:03:20,868 --> 00:03:23,237 OFFICIATED A WEDDING BETWEEN A WHITE WOMAN 85 00:03:23,271 --> 00:03:26,540 AND A WAMAPOKE INDIAN CHIEF. 86 00:03:26,574 --> 00:03:30,844 THE SECRET CEREMONY WAS BEAUTIFUL AND ROMANTIC. 87 00:03:30,878 --> 00:03:31,945 BUT THEN WORD GOT OUT 88 00:03:31,979 --> 00:03:36,684 AND THE RECEPTION WAS A BLOODBATH. 89 00:03:36,717 --> 00:03:39,853 FORTUNATELY, THERE WERE TWO SURVIVORS. 90 00:03:39,887 --> 00:03:42,556 UNFORTUNATELY, THEY WERE BOTH HORSES. 91 00:03:42,590 --> 00:03:45,726 - HOLD UP. FORMER BEAUTY QUEEN JESSICA WICKS? 92 00:03:45,759 --> 00:03:47,495 - YES. - I'M TOM HAVERFORD. 93 00:03:47,528 --> 00:03:49,397 I'M GONNA BE RUNNING POINT ON THIS, BILL. 94 00:03:49,430 --> 00:03:50,598 - WHY DIDN'T YOU TRY TO STOP HER? 95 00:03:50,631 --> 00:03:51,732 - HER HUSBAND IS NICK NEWPORT, SR. 96 00:03:51,765 --> 00:03:53,267 FROM SWEETUMS. 97 00:03:53,301 --> 00:03:55,002 EVERYONE IN THIS TOWN IS AFRAID TO SAY NO TO HIM. 98 00:03:55,035 --> 00:03:56,370 - OKAY, EVERYBODY JUST RELAX. 99 00:03:56,404 --> 00:03:58,739 WHAT ALTERATIONS IS SHE TRYING TO MAKE? 100 00:03:58,772 --> 00:04:02,410 - DRILLING HOLES. PAINTING. UH, REMOVING WAINSCOTING. 101 00:04:02,443 --> 00:04:04,578 UH, SHE'S TEARING DOWN THE GAZEBO. 102 00:04:04,612 --> 00:04:06,814 - WHAT? SHE'S WHAT? NO, SHE'S NOT. 103 00:04:06,847 --> 00:04:08,316 OKAY, TOM, GO GET THE CAR. 104 00:04:08,349 --> 00:04:10,451 - OW! - OH, SORRY. 105 00:04:10,484 --> 00:04:12,820 - DON'T THROW THINGS AT ME. - OH, THESE ARE TIGHT. 106 00:04:12,853 --> 00:04:14,955 - I'LL DEVISE AN ACTION PLAN 107 00:04:14,988 --> 00:04:16,790 TO HELP US COORDINATE BETTER AMONG THE DEPARTMENTS. 108 00:04:16,824 --> 00:04:19,293 - WILL YOU? GREAT. THANKS FOR COMING IN. 109 00:04:19,327 --> 00:04:21,729 WHO'S NEXT? - TOM, I'LL MEET YOU AT THE CAR. 110 00:04:21,762 --> 00:04:22,796 - WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU GOING? 111 00:04:22,830 --> 00:04:23,797 WE HAVE 91 MORE MEETINGS. 112 00:04:23,831 --> 00:04:24,798 - I'M SORRY, RON. 113 00:04:24,832 --> 00:04:26,434 AS MUCH AS I WOULD LIKE TO GO 114 00:04:26,467 --> 00:04:28,369 FOR THE ALL-TIME, CITY HALL SINGLE DAY MEETINGS RECORD, 115 00:04:28,402 --> 00:04:29,903 THERE IS AN EMERGENCY. 116 00:04:29,937 --> 00:04:35,743 SOMEONE IS TRYING TO ALTER A GAZEBO. 117 00:04:35,776 --> 00:04:37,778 - HEY. - OH, HEY, ANN. 118 00:04:37,811 --> 00:04:39,747 SORRY I CAN'T HANG OUT. I KIND OF HAVE AN EMERGENCY. 119 00:04:39,780 --> 00:04:41,582 - OH, I'M ACTUALLY HERE TO SEE MARK. 120 00:04:41,615 --> 00:04:43,684 - RIGHT. OH, WELL, THANKS FOR THE COFFEE. 121 00:04:43,717 --> 00:04:46,620 - THAT'S ALSO FOR MARK. - MM. I REALLY NEED IT THOUGH. 122 00:04:46,654 --> 00:04:49,657 BUT NEXT TIME MORE SUGAR. OKAY, THANKS. BYE! 123 00:04:49,690 --> 00:04:50,791 - UM, DO YOU WANT ME TO POSTPONE THE REST? 124 00:04:50,824 --> 00:04:53,827 OR I COULD SET MYSELF ON FIRE AND CREATE A DIVERSION. 125 00:04:53,861 --> 00:04:55,829 - NO. I'M GONNA DO ALL OF THESE TODAY. 126 00:04:55,863 --> 00:04:57,064 ROUND UP WHOEVER'S FREE. 127 00:04:57,097 --> 00:05:00,368 I'M GONNA NEED MORE RON SWANSONS. 128 00:05:00,401 --> 00:05:02,736 - LOOK AT THAT. IT'S GORGEOUS. 129 00:05:02,770 --> 00:05:05,673 WHAT KIND OF MONSTER WOULD WANT TO CHANGE THIS? 130 00:05:05,706 --> 00:05:07,875 - UGH! PRE-ZIT. 131 00:05:07,908 --> 00:05:10,444 DO YOU HAVE ANY, UH, BROWN CONCEALER BY ANY CHANCE? 132 00:05:10,478 --> 00:05:12,012 I NEED TO LOOK GOOD FOR JESSICA. 133 00:05:12,045 --> 00:05:14,715 - THEY MAY BE RICH, BUT THEY CAN'T JUST DESTROY HISTORY. 134 00:05:14,748 --> 00:05:16,517 LET'S GO. - RIGHT BEHIND YOU. 135 00:05:16,550 --> 00:05:20,588 I JUST NEED TO SPEND A MINUTE ON MY COLOGNE CLOUD. 136 00:05:20,621 --> 00:05:23,424 - [coughs] WHAT IS THAT? - ATTACK BY DENNIS FEINSTEIN. 137 00:05:23,457 --> 00:05:24,692 WHEN YOU WANT TO ATTACK THE SENSES 138 00:05:24,725 --> 00:05:25,859 OF THE LADY YOU WANT TO BED. 139 00:05:25,893 --> 00:05:28,996 - OH, MY GOD. - DOOR! DOOR! DOOR! DOOR! 140 00:05:29,029 --> 00:05:30,698 CLOSE IT. - UGH. 141 00:05:30,731 --> 00:05:33,834 - SO BASICALLY, WE'RE COMPLETELY SWAMPED. 142 00:05:33,867 --> 00:05:35,603 ALL HANDS ON DECK. 143 00:05:35,636 --> 00:05:36,704 - I DON'T EVEN WORK IN THIS BUILDING. 144 00:05:36,737 --> 00:05:39,540 - DON'T CARE. I NEED ANYONE WITH A PULSE AND A BRAIN 145 00:05:39,573 --> 00:05:40,408 TO PITCH IN. 146 00:05:40,441 --> 00:05:42,710 - RON, DO YOU NEED HELP WITH ANYTHING? 147 00:05:42,743 --> 00:05:43,977 - NO. WE'RE GOOD. THANKS. 148 00:05:44,011 --> 00:05:46,747 IN FACT, YOU CAN HEAD HOME EARLY. 149 00:05:46,780 --> 00:05:48,148 RIGHT NOW THE FOUR OF US ARE GOING TO DIVVY UP 150 00:05:48,181 --> 00:05:49,683 ALL THESE MEETINGS. 151 00:05:49,717 --> 00:05:51,018 JUST MAKE 'EM FEEL LIKE THEY'VE BEEN HEARD. 152 00:05:51,051 --> 00:05:52,720 UNDERSTOOD? - YES, SIR. 153 00:05:52,753 --> 00:05:56,724 BERT MACKLIN, FBI, ON THE CASE. 154 00:05:56,757 --> 00:05:58,859 - APRIL, YOU TAKE LESLIE'S OFFICE. 155 00:05:58,892 --> 00:06:00,528 ANDY, YOU'RE IN THE CONFERENCE ROOM. 156 00:06:00,561 --> 00:06:02,463 ANN, TAKE YOUR MEETINGS IN THE COURTYARD. 157 00:06:02,496 --> 00:06:06,066 JUST SIT THERE AND DON'T RUIN THE CITY. 158 00:06:06,099 --> 00:06:09,803 DISMISSED. 159 00:06:09,837 --> 00:06:10,771 WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 160 00:06:10,804 --> 00:06:13,073 - CAN I GET A BADGE? 161 00:06:13,106 --> 00:06:17,478 - HEY. BROUGHT YOU COFFEE. HELP YOU GET THROUGH THE DAY. 162 00:06:17,511 --> 00:06:22,850 - THANKS, DUDE. - NO PROBLEM, LADY. 163 00:06:26,687 --> 00:06:28,188 I'M GONNA GO. - OKAY. 164 00:06:28,221 --> 00:06:31,792 APRIL IS THE BEST. BUT SHE'S 20. 165 00:06:31,825 --> 00:06:33,794 WHEN APRIL WAS BORN, I WAS ALREADY IN 3RD GRADE. 166 00:06:33,827 --> 00:06:35,829 WHICH MEANS IF WE WERE FRIENDS BACK THEN, 167 00:06:35,863 --> 00:06:38,666 I'D HAVE BEEN HANGING OUT WITH A BABY. 168 00:06:38,699 --> 00:06:41,802 I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT INFANT CARE. 169 00:06:41,835 --> 00:06:46,507 MY GOD, I COULD'VE KILLED HER. 170 00:06:46,540 --> 00:06:48,108 - AH, MR. NEWPORT, SR. 171 00:06:48,141 --> 00:06:49,777 I'VE JUST BEEN INFORMED THAT YOU PLAN 172 00:06:49,810 --> 00:06:50,911 ON ALTERING THIS MANSION. 173 00:06:50,944 --> 00:06:52,980 AND AS A MEMBER OF THE PARKS DEPARTMENT, 174 00:06:53,013 --> 00:06:55,182 AS A PAWNEEAN, AND AN AMERICAN, 175 00:06:55,215 --> 00:06:57,451 I ASK YOU TO REFRAIN 176 00:06:57,485 --> 00:07:00,488 FROM HARMING THIS HISTORIC STRUCTURE. 177 00:07:00,521 --> 00:07:01,689 - WHAT? 178 00:07:01,722 --> 00:07:03,090 - I'LL TAKE CARE OF THIS, LOVE NUT. 179 00:07:03,123 --> 00:07:05,693 - BISCUIT. - YEAH. HI. 180 00:07:05,726 --> 00:07:09,029 I'M JESSICA WICKS. MISS PAWNEE 1994. 181 00:07:09,062 --> 00:07:10,063 - HELLO. YES, WE'VE MET BEFORE. 182 00:07:10,097 --> 00:07:12,065 WE WERE BOTH JUDGES AT THE PAGEANT LAST YEAR. 183 00:07:12,099 --> 00:07:14,968 - LESLIE KNORP. OF COURSE. HOW ARE YOU? 184 00:07:15,002 --> 00:07:17,671 - JESSICA WICKS! HEY, BOO. 185 00:07:17,705 --> 00:07:20,140 ARE YOU AGING IN REVERSE 'CAUSE YOU LOOK BARELY LEGAL? 186 00:07:20,173 --> 00:07:21,609 - TOM HAVERFORD. 187 00:07:21,642 --> 00:07:23,544 IF YOU'RE NOT THE MOST CHARMING MAN IN INDIANA. 188 00:07:23,577 --> 00:07:26,046 - AND THIS MUST BE THE LUCKIEST MAN IN INDIANA. 189 00:07:26,079 --> 00:07:29,717 SIR, IT IS AN HONOR TO MEET YOU. 190 00:07:29,750 --> 00:07:32,953 COME HERE, YOU. 191 00:07:32,986 --> 00:07:36,223 - TELL ME STRAIGHT. ARE YOU A CHINESE? 192 00:07:36,256 --> 00:07:39,760 - NO. I'M ONE OF THE INDIAN PEOPLE. 193 00:07:39,793 --> 00:07:41,194 THAT FLOPPY OLD BAG OF MONEY 194 00:07:41,228 --> 00:07:43,731 IS GONNA BE DEAD IN, LIKE, A MONTH. 195 00:07:43,764 --> 00:07:45,899 AND WHO'S GOING TO COMFORT JESSICA 196 00:07:45,933 --> 00:07:47,935 AND HER MILLIONS OF DOLLARS? 197 00:07:47,968 --> 00:07:52,005 YEAH, JESSICA'S A GOLD DIGGER, BUT I'M A GOLD DIGGER DIGGER. 198 00:07:52,039 --> 00:07:55,543 SO HOW DID YOU AND MR. NEWPORT MEET? 199 00:07:55,576 --> 00:07:58,579 - WELL, I WAS DOING A RIBBON CUTTING AT THE HOSPITAL. 200 00:07:58,612 --> 00:08:01,048 AND HE WAS THERE BECAUSE HIS BLOOD DOESN'T WORK. 201 00:08:01,081 --> 00:08:02,783 AND WE STARTED TALKING. 202 00:08:02,816 --> 00:08:04,752 AND THEN I REALIZED WHO HE WAS. 203 00:08:04,785 --> 00:08:08,255 [laughs] OH, MY GOSH. IT WAS LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT. 204 00:08:08,288 --> 00:08:10,624 - OH, THAT SOUNDS SO ROMANTIC. 205 00:08:10,658 --> 00:08:13,026 UM, JESSICA, I KNOW YOU'VE RENTED OUT THIS HOUSE 206 00:08:13,060 --> 00:08:15,195 FOR A PARTY, BUT IT'S ON THE HISTORICAL REGISTER 207 00:08:15,228 --> 00:08:16,830 SO WE CAN'T ALLOW ANY CHANGES. 208 00:08:16,864 --> 00:08:17,965 I--I'M SO SORRY. 209 00:08:17,998 --> 00:08:21,068 - [laughs] IT'S A LITTLE LATE FOR THAT, SWEETHEART. 210 00:08:21,101 --> 00:08:23,103 I TOLD THEM WHAT I WAS DOING MONTHS AGO. 211 00:08:23,136 --> 00:08:24,872 WHERE I COME FROM THERE'S A SAYING 212 00:08:24,905 --> 00:08:26,874 "WHAT'S DONE IS DONE." HMM. 213 00:08:26,907 --> 00:08:28,241 - THAT'S A SAYING EVERYWHERE. 214 00:08:28,275 --> 00:08:29,543 - I'VE NEVER HEARD IT BEFORE 215 00:08:29,577 --> 00:08:30,844 AND I THINK IT'S A GREAT SAYING. 216 00:08:30,878 --> 00:08:32,179 - WELL, MAYBE WE CAN JUST LIMIT THE DAMAGE. 217 00:08:32,212 --> 00:08:35,749 HOW MUCH HAVE YOU DONE? YOU PAINTED THIS? 218 00:08:35,783 --> 00:08:38,852 - UH-HUH. MIAMI TEAL IS NICKY'S FAVORITE COLOR. 219 00:08:38,886 --> 00:08:40,888 WE ALSO REPLACED SOME OF THE SCONCES, 220 00:08:40,921 --> 00:08:43,924 GOT RID OF THE FURNITURE, PAINTED THESE FLOORS BLACK. 221 00:08:43,957 --> 00:08:45,826 - OH, MY GOD, THESE WERE THE ORIGINAL HARDWOOD FLOORS. 222 00:08:45,859 --> 00:08:47,695 - YEAH. THEY WERE ALL SCRATCHED UP. 223 00:08:47,728 --> 00:08:49,797 I DID YOU A FAVOR. COME ON IN HERE. 224 00:08:49,830 --> 00:08:51,298 I'LL SHOW YOU GUYS WHAT WE DID IN THE SITTING ROOM. 225 00:08:51,331 --> 00:08:53,634 - AFTER YOU. I'D HATE TO MISS THE VIEW. 226 00:08:53,667 --> 00:08:54,602 - OH! YOU LITTLE DEVIL. 227 00:08:54,635 --> 00:08:57,705 I SHOULD JUST PAY YOU TO FOLLOW ME AROUND. 228 00:08:57,738 --> 00:08:59,106 - IF THAT'S A JOB OFFER, I ACCEPT. 229 00:08:59,139 --> 00:09:00,974 - OH, MY GOD. 230 00:09:01,008 --> 00:09:03,577 WHY DID YOU HAVE TO DRILL HOLES IN THE WALL? 231 00:09:03,611 --> 00:09:06,747 - TO HANG MY BIRTHDAY PRESENT TO NICKY. 232 00:09:06,780 --> 00:09:08,248 - MY HEAVENS. 233 00:09:08,281 --> 00:09:12,119 - ISN'T THERE A WAY THAT THAT YOU--OH, MY. 234 00:09:12,152 --> 00:09:13,754 HISTORY IS IMPORTANT. 235 00:09:13,787 --> 00:09:15,723 YOU JUST CAN'T GO AROUND CHANGING EVERYTHING 236 00:09:15,756 --> 00:09:17,658 ALL THE TIME OR ELSE NEXT THING YOU KNOW 237 00:09:17,691 --> 00:09:20,327 THEY'LL BE PAINTING THE WHITE HOUSE... 238 00:09:20,360 --> 00:09:22,930 NOT WHITE. 239 00:09:22,963 --> 00:09:26,333 I'M SO ANGRY, I CAN'T THINK OF ANOTHER COLOR. 240 00:09:26,366 --> 00:09:27,868 GREEN. 241 00:09:29,637 --> 00:09:32,005 - SO YOUR DEPARTMENT BANNED ME FROM ATTENDING GAMES 242 00:09:32,039 --> 00:09:34,374 JUST BECAUSE I YELL "YOU SUCK" AT THE PLAYERS. 243 00:09:34,407 --> 00:09:35,976 - ACCORDING TO THE COMPLAINT, 244 00:09:36,009 --> 00:09:38,712 YOU YELLED IT AT FIVE-YEAR-OLD GIRLS. 245 00:09:38,746 --> 00:09:43,083 - WHO SUCK! WHY IS THAT SO HARD TO UNDERSTAND? 246 00:09:43,116 --> 00:09:45,753 - I THOUGHT I WAS HAVING THIS MEETING WITH RON SWANSON. 247 00:09:45,786 --> 00:09:47,788 - I'M AFRAID THAT RON SWANSON'S 248 00:09:47,821 --> 00:09:49,089 CURRENTLY DEAD. 249 00:09:49,122 --> 00:09:50,691 - OH. - I'M HIS DAUGHTER. 250 00:09:50,724 --> 00:09:52,325 APRIL SWANSON. 251 00:09:52,359 --> 00:09:54,762 AND IT'S HIS LAST WISH 252 00:09:54,795 --> 00:09:56,697 THAT I HAVE THIS MEETING WITH YOU. 253 00:09:56,730 --> 00:09:58,866 - I REPRESENT THE ULTIMATE FRISBEE LEAGUE. 254 00:09:58,899 --> 00:10:01,301 - PAWNEE HAS AN ULTIMATE LEAGUE? - YES. 255 00:10:01,334 --> 00:10:03,336 AND WE KEEP RUNNING INTO CONFLICTS-- 256 00:10:03,370 --> 00:10:06,173 - YOU WON ME OVER. I WILL JOIN YOUR TEAM. 257 00:10:06,206 --> 00:10:08,375 - I'M SORRY, UM, WHAT WE NEED-- 258 00:10:08,408 --> 00:10:10,744 - WHEN DOES PRACTICE START? AND DO YOU PROVIDE THE JERSEYS? 259 00:10:10,778 --> 00:10:12,079 WHAT COLOR ARE THE JERSEYS BY THE WAY? 260 00:10:12,112 --> 00:10:15,683 WHAT'S OUR TEAM NAME? ARE WE "THE LIGHTNING"? 261 00:10:15,716 --> 00:10:16,984 - NOW, I HAVE TO TELL YOU, 262 00:10:17,017 --> 00:10:18,819 I DON'T ACTUALLY WORK IN THE PARKS DEPARTMENT. 263 00:10:18,852 --> 00:10:21,755 I'M A NURSE. - SERIOUSLY? 264 00:10:21,789 --> 00:10:22,923 THAT'S GREAT NEWS. 265 00:10:22,956 --> 00:10:26,760 I HAVE THE WEIRDEST THING ON MY ARM. 266 00:10:26,794 --> 00:10:30,330 CAN YOU SEE THIS? - EVERY TIME. 267 00:10:30,363 --> 00:10:33,100 - WELL, THANK GOD YOU HAVEN'T TORN DOWN THE GAZEBO YET. 268 00:10:33,133 --> 00:10:35,002 - UGH. DON'T REMIND ME. 269 00:10:35,035 --> 00:10:37,805 THE DEMOLITION PEOPLE COULDN'T GET HERE UNTIL THIS AFTERNOON. 270 00:10:37,838 --> 00:10:40,273 I'VE HAD TO LOOK AT THAT UGLY THING ALL DAY LONG. 271 00:10:40,307 --> 00:10:42,409 - UGLY THING? 272 00:10:42,442 --> 00:10:43,677 LET ME TELL YOU A LITTLE SOMETHING 273 00:10:43,711 --> 00:10:45,445 ABOUT THIS UGLY THING, MA'AM. 274 00:10:45,478 --> 00:10:47,414 150 YEARS AGO, AN INTERRACIAL COUPLE 275 00:10:47,447 --> 00:10:49,116 WAS MARRIED HERE AND THEN SLAUGHTERED 276 00:10:49,149 --> 00:10:50,784 BY THEIR OWN FAMILIES. 277 00:10:50,818 --> 00:10:53,420 IT'S ONE OF THE MOST BEAUTIFUL STORIES IN PAWNEE'S HISTORY. 278 00:10:53,453 --> 00:10:54,822 WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO DESTROY IT? 279 00:10:54,855 --> 00:10:56,757 - DON'T TELL ME ABOUT PAWNEE HISTORY. 280 00:10:56,790 --> 00:10:58,692 THE NEWPORTS MADE THIS TOWN. 281 00:10:58,726 --> 00:11:01,161 AND TONIGHT, WE'RE GONNA CELEBRATE MY HUSBAND'S 282 00:11:01,194 --> 00:11:05,465 85TH BIRTHDAY WITHOUT THIS MUSHY, OLD, PILE OF ROT. 283 00:11:05,498 --> 00:11:07,434 - YOUR HUSBAND'S A MUSHY, OLD, PILE OF ROT. 284 00:11:07,467 --> 00:11:08,836 - YOU WERE A STICK IN THE MUD 285 00:11:08,869 --> 00:11:10,704 WHEN WE JUDGED THAT BEAUTY PAGEANT 286 00:11:10,738 --> 00:11:12,840 AND YOU'RE BEING A STICK IN THE MUD NOW! 287 00:11:12,873 --> 00:11:14,942 - I AM NOT A STICK IN THE MUD! 288 00:11:14,975 --> 00:11:18,979 I-I JUST WANT TO STOP A PARTY FROM HAPPENING. 289 00:11:19,012 --> 00:11:21,114 RON, I HAVE A GAZEBO UPDATE 290 00:11:21,148 --> 00:11:23,350 SO IGNORE ALL MY PREVIOUS VOICEMAILS AND EMAILS. 291 00:11:23,383 --> 00:11:26,253 - UH, LESLIE, I HAVEN'T RELIEVED MYSELF IN FIVE HOURS. 292 00:11:26,286 --> 00:11:28,321 SO IF YOU'LL EXCUSE ME. 293 00:11:28,355 --> 00:11:29,422 - RON, I'M SORRY, BUT THIS CAN'T WAIT. 294 00:11:29,456 --> 00:11:32,726 JESSICA WICKS REFUSES-- - LESLIE, WHAT THE [bleep]? 295 00:11:32,760 --> 00:11:34,194 - HEY! - MISS KNOPE! 296 00:11:34,227 --> 00:11:36,063 - COUNCILMAN HOWSER! NICE TO SEE YOU AGAIN. 297 00:11:36,096 --> 00:11:37,965 NOT THAT I SAW ANYTHING OTHER THAN YOUR FACE. 298 00:11:37,998 --> 00:11:39,432 AND I WOULD LIKE TO TALK TO YOU A LITTLE BIT 299 00:11:39,466 --> 00:11:40,433 ABOUT THIS GAZEBO THING. 300 00:11:40,467 --> 00:11:41,902 YOU KNOW, THE P-- OKAY. OKAY. 301 00:11:41,935 --> 00:11:44,938 - ENOUGH OF THIS. DO WHATEVER YOU WANT. 302 00:11:44,972 --> 00:11:47,340 ALERT THE MEDIA. CALL FEMA. I DON'T CARE. 303 00:11:47,374 --> 00:11:49,777 DO NOT BOTHER ME WITH THIS AGAIN. 304 00:11:49,810 --> 00:11:54,181 - [sighs] 305 00:11:54,214 --> 00:11:56,283 - MISS KNOPE. - COUNCILMAN HOWSER. 306 00:11:56,316 --> 00:11:57,918 I SAW YOUR PENIS. 307 00:11:57,951 --> 00:12:00,520 - THERE ARE EIGHT SWINGS AT RAMSETT PARK 308 00:12:00,553 --> 00:12:02,756 AND EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM IS BROKEN. 309 00:12:02,790 --> 00:12:04,858 CAN YOU PLEASE JUST FIX ONE OF THEM? 310 00:12:04,892 --> 00:12:07,861 - RON TOLD ME I CAN'T SAY YES TO ANYTHING. 311 00:12:07,895 --> 00:12:11,531 BUT IT'S SUCH A REASONABLE REQUEST, 312 00:12:11,564 --> 00:12:13,133 I CAN'T JUST SAY NO. 313 00:12:13,166 --> 00:12:16,469 [crackling exhale] - SO THAT'S A "YES"? 314 00:12:16,503 --> 00:12:19,339 - [warbling tone] - ARE YOU SAYING "YES"? 315 00:12:19,372 --> 00:12:21,541 JUST SAY OUT LOUD "YES" OR "NO". 316 00:12:21,574 --> 00:12:27,380 - EEEEEEE-BOOP! 317 00:12:27,414 --> 00:12:30,183 - YEAH, THEY DO LOOK A LITTLE BIT SWOLLEN. 318 00:12:30,217 --> 00:12:32,820 JUST FOLLOW THE PEN. 319 00:12:32,853 --> 00:12:36,323 FOLLOW THE PEN T... 320 00:12:36,356 --> 00:12:38,792 DOES--DOES THAT HURT? 321 00:12:38,826 --> 00:12:40,027 [exhales] 322 00:12:40,060 --> 00:12:41,829 - THERE'S NO WAY THIS ORDINANCE GOES THROUGH. 323 00:12:41,862 --> 00:12:42,662 THERE'S TOO MUCH RED TAPE. 324 00:12:42,695 --> 00:12:43,931 - MM. THIS GRIDLOCK DRIVES ME NUTS. 325 00:12:43,964 --> 00:12:45,098 - TELL ME ABOUT IT. 326 00:12:45,132 --> 00:12:46,466 - YEAH, I THINK YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO MAKE 327 00:12:46,499 --> 00:12:47,400 AN END RUN, YOU KNOW? 328 00:12:47,434 --> 00:12:48,969 GO RIGHT TO THE COMMISSIONER ON THIS ONE. 329 00:12:49,002 --> 00:12:50,370 - YOU KNOW WHAT, I HADN'T THOUGHT OF THAT. 330 00:12:50,403 --> 00:12:51,805 THAT IS A REALLY GREAT IDEA. - YEAH? 331 00:12:51,839 --> 00:12:53,841 - I'M GONNA DO THAT. - OKAY. 332 00:12:53,874 --> 00:12:56,243 YOUR LAST RESORT IS PROBABLY GONNA BE CITY COUNCIL. 333 00:12:56,276 --> 00:12:59,479 - GOOD LUCK THERE. [chuckles] - YEAH, MY THOUGHTS EXACTLY. 334 00:12:59,512 --> 00:13:01,548 I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I WAS SAYING. 335 00:13:01,581 --> 00:13:02,482 - I ASK YOU, 336 00:13:02,515 --> 00:13:05,152 IS THIS TOO REVEALING FOR A PUBLIC POOL? 337 00:13:05,185 --> 00:13:07,821 - KINDLY GET YOUR GROIN OFF MY DESK. 338 00:13:07,855 --> 00:13:11,558 - SO MY BODY MAKES YOU UNCOMFORTABLE TOO? 339 00:13:11,591 --> 00:13:13,961 - HEY, MARK, I'M KIND OF FREAKING OUT 340 00:13:13,994 --> 00:13:15,863 ABOUT THIS HISTORICAL MANSION THING. 341 00:13:15,896 --> 00:13:17,130 CAN I TALK TO YOU FOR A SECOND? 342 00:13:17,164 --> 00:13:18,899 - I'M ACTUALLY HEADED RIGHT OUT THE DOOR. 343 00:13:18,932 --> 00:13:20,834 - OH, YOU'RE GOING ON A DATE WITH ANN? 344 00:13:20,868 --> 00:13:22,235 - UH, YEAH, I WAS GONNA SURPRISE HER. 345 00:13:22,269 --> 00:13:23,503 TAKE HER TO A NICE RESTAURANT. 346 00:13:23,536 --> 00:13:24,604 - DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT. - YOU SURE NOW? 347 00:13:24,637 --> 00:13:26,606 - YEAH. HAVE A GOOD TIME. 348 00:13:26,639 --> 00:13:29,076 - HOW WE DOING? - PRETTY GOOD. 349 00:13:29,109 --> 00:13:32,913 I MAY HAVE PROMISED A NEW AQUATIC CENTER TO SOMEBODY. 350 00:13:32,946 --> 00:13:34,247 IS THAT A PROBLEM? 351 00:13:34,281 --> 00:13:36,216 - I DIAGNOSED TWO MELANOMAS. 352 00:13:36,249 --> 00:13:37,250 THEY'RE BOTH BENIGN. 353 00:13:37,284 --> 00:13:40,854 - HOW MANY MORE MEETINGS? - 20. 354 00:13:40,888 --> 00:13:42,890 - APRIL WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE MOAT 355 00:13:42,923 --> 00:13:47,027 THAT KEPT THE CITIZEN BARBARIANS AWAY FROM SWANSON CASTLE. 356 00:13:47,060 --> 00:13:51,164 INSTEAD, SHE BLEW UP THE CASTLE AND STABBED ME IN THE FACE. 357 00:13:51,198 --> 00:13:56,403 I HIRED YOU TO DO ONE THING. JUST ONE. 358 00:13:56,436 --> 00:13:59,339 I DON'T CARE THAT YOU TEXT ALL DAY AND SLEEP AT YOUR DESK. 359 00:13:59,372 --> 00:14:01,308 IN FACT, I ENCOURAGE IT. 360 00:14:01,341 --> 00:14:04,477 BUT ONLY BECAUSE YOU WERE DOING THAT ONE THING... 361 00:14:04,511 --> 00:14:08,481 KEEPING THIS CRAP OFF MY DESK! 362 00:14:08,515 --> 00:14:11,885 GIVE ME FIVE MINUTES BEFORE THE NEXT ONE. 363 00:14:17,257 --> 00:14:18,625 - THAT GUY IS SCARY WHEN HE'S ANGRY. 364 00:14:18,658 --> 00:14:20,493 - YEAH, GOD, I KNOW. 365 00:14:20,527 --> 00:14:25,098 HEY, SORRY, DUDE. - I DON'T NEED YOUR SYMPATHY. 366 00:14:25,132 --> 00:14:26,366 OR YOURS. 367 00:14:26,399 --> 00:14:30,003 - I WASN'T OFFERING MY SYMPATHY. 368 00:14:30,037 --> 00:14:31,338 - THANK YOU FOR MEETING ME HERE. 369 00:14:31,371 --> 00:14:33,540 - SURE. WHAT'S UP? 370 00:14:33,573 --> 00:14:35,208 - OKAY, I NEED YOU TO GET THIS WORD FOR WORD. 371 00:14:35,242 --> 00:14:38,078 - IT'S A TAPE RECORDER SO IT WILL. 372 00:14:38,111 --> 00:14:40,547 - [dramatically] GAZEBO? MORE LIKE "GA-ZOINKS-BO." 373 00:14:40,580 --> 00:14:41,648 SHE MAY BE A FORMER BEAUTY QUEEN, 374 00:14:41,681 --> 00:14:44,517 BUT TODAY SHE'S THE KING OF DESTROYING HISTORY. 375 00:14:44,551 --> 00:14:46,253 - OKAY, COULD YOU JUST, MAYBE, TALK NORMALLY? 376 00:14:46,286 --> 00:14:48,488 - OKAY, FINE. GA-ZOINKS-BO. 377 00:14:48,521 --> 00:14:50,190 JESSICA WICKS IS THROWING A BIRTHDAY PARTY 378 00:14:50,223 --> 00:14:52,025 FOR HER HUSBAND, NICK NEWPORT, SR., 379 00:14:52,059 --> 00:14:53,226 AT THE TURNBILL MANSION TONIGHT. 380 00:14:53,260 --> 00:14:55,395 - OKAY, I'M GONNA STOP YOU RIGHT THERE. 381 00:14:55,428 --> 00:14:58,665 UH, NICK NEWPORT, SR. IS THE FORMER CEO OF SWEETUMS. 382 00:14:58,698 --> 00:15:00,233 - SO? 383 00:15:00,267 --> 00:15:01,368 - SWEETUMS OWNS THE PAWNEE JOURNAL. 384 00:15:01,401 --> 00:15:03,503 - CRRR-AP ON THE COB. 385 00:15:03,536 --> 00:15:06,039 - I WILL TAKE IT INTO CONSIDERATION. 386 00:15:06,073 --> 00:15:10,043 THANK GOD! THAT WAS IT, RIGHT? 387 00:15:10,077 --> 00:15:12,445 - UH, NO, THERE'S ONE MORE. - DAMN IT TO HELL! 388 00:15:12,479 --> 00:15:14,114 - IT'S WITH ME. AND IT'S RIGHT NOW. 389 00:15:14,147 --> 00:15:16,549 AND IT'S ABOUT ME QUITTING. 390 00:15:16,583 --> 00:15:20,487 I QUIT. 391 00:15:20,520 --> 00:15:21,754 - I HAVE NO OTHER CHOICE, OKAY? 392 00:15:21,788 --> 00:15:25,192 THIS IS THE ONLY RATIONAL WAY I KNOW TO PREVENT THIS TRAGEDY. 393 00:15:25,225 --> 00:15:27,260 [vehicle approaching] OH, MY GOD. HERE THEY COME. 394 00:15:27,294 --> 00:15:28,728 TOM, THROW AWAY THE KEY! - SERIOUSLY? 395 00:15:28,761 --> 00:15:31,464 - YES, THROW IT! 396 00:15:31,498 --> 00:15:32,465 - OUT OF THE WAY! 397 00:15:32,499 --> 00:15:35,002 - SIR, I'M SORRY, BUT YOU'RE A LITTLE LATE. 398 00:15:35,035 --> 00:15:36,636 YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO TURN THIS THING AROUND 399 00:15:36,669 --> 00:15:39,739 'CAUSE YOU'RE NOT GETTING IN HERE. 400 00:15:39,772 --> 00:15:43,310 MY GOD. TOM, STOP HIM! JUMP IN FRONT OF IT! 401 00:15:43,343 --> 00:15:47,514 SACRIFICE YOUR TINY BODY! 402 00:15:50,517 --> 00:15:52,519 REALLY THOUGHT THAT GATE WOULD OPEN IN THE MIDDLE. 403 00:15:58,091 --> 00:15:59,993 - WELL, THE GAZEBO HAS BEEN DESTROYED. 404 00:16:00,027 --> 00:16:03,230 AND THE THING THAT BOTHERS ME THE MOST-- 405 00:16:03,263 --> 00:16:04,664 CUT IT OUT, TOM. 406 00:16:04,697 --> 00:16:08,135 - IT NEVER GETS OLD! - [sighs] 407 00:16:08,168 --> 00:16:09,736 OH, HEY, ANN AND MARK ARE COMING! 408 00:16:09,769 --> 00:16:12,005 GUYS, NOT SO CLOSE. YOU'RE GONNA--YOU'RE GONNA-- 409 00:16:12,039 --> 00:16:14,774 DON'T GO PAST THE SENSOR! 410 00:16:14,807 --> 00:16:17,110 - SENSOR. 411 00:16:17,144 --> 00:16:18,711 - SORRY IF I RUINED YOUR EVENING. 412 00:16:18,745 --> 00:16:21,314 - LESLIE, IT'S TOTALLY FINE. - I CHAINED MYSELF TO A GATE. 413 00:16:21,348 --> 00:16:23,050 - I CAN SEE THAT. - ARE YOU OKAY? 414 00:16:23,083 --> 00:16:26,386 - NOTHING'S BRUISED BUT MY EGO AND MY ARM A LITTLE 415 00:16:26,419 --> 00:16:28,121 FROM THE MECHANIZED GATE. 416 00:16:28,155 --> 00:16:30,257 - THANKS AGAIN FOR LETTING ME TAKE THOSE MEETINGS TODAY. 417 00:16:30,290 --> 00:16:32,759 I'VE NEVER REALLY HAD A MEETING BEFORE. 418 00:16:32,792 --> 00:16:35,128 THEY'RE AWESOME. - YOU'RE WELCOME. 419 00:16:35,162 --> 00:16:36,096 - HEY, HAVE YOU SEEN APRIL AROUND? 420 00:16:36,129 --> 00:16:37,564 SHE USUALLY COMES BY AT THE END OF THE DAY. 421 00:16:37,597 --> 00:16:39,466 - YOU MIGHT WANT TO CHECK HER HOUSE. 422 00:16:39,499 --> 00:16:40,800 SHE QUIT ON ME. 423 00:16:40,833 --> 00:16:42,502 - WHAT? WHY? 424 00:16:42,535 --> 00:16:45,238 - SHE SCREWED UP MY ENTIRE LIFE TODAY. 425 00:16:45,272 --> 00:16:48,341 THAT WAS ONE MISTAKE. SHE'S PERFECT FOR YOU. 426 00:16:48,375 --> 00:16:50,077 COME ON. THERE'S NO ONE IN THE WORLD 427 00:16:50,110 --> 00:16:53,480 WHO'S GONNA DO A BETTER JOB FOR YOU THAN APRIL. 428 00:16:53,513 --> 00:16:54,814 EITHER YOU HIRE HER BACK OR I QUIT. 429 00:16:54,847 --> 00:16:58,485 - YOU DON'T WORK FOR ME. - AND I NEVER WILL, SIR. 430 00:16:58,518 --> 00:17:00,087 GOOD DAY. 431 00:17:05,358 --> 00:17:07,360 - SO WHAT'D YOU GUYS TALK ABOUT AT DINNER? 432 00:17:07,394 --> 00:17:10,163 HUH? WAS IT FUN? ANY BIG DECISIONS ARRIVED AT? 433 00:17:10,197 --> 00:17:13,066 - IT WAS FINE. - UH, DO YOU NEED A RIDE HOME? 434 00:17:13,100 --> 00:17:16,069 - NO, TOM'S GONNA TAKE ME. YOU GUYS GO ON AHEAD. 435 00:17:16,103 --> 00:17:17,470 - I'M GLAD YOU'RE OKAY. CALL ME TOMORROW. 436 00:17:17,504 --> 00:17:20,107 - BYE, LESLIE. 437 00:17:23,410 --> 00:17:26,713 - WELL, HELLO THERE. YOU MUST BE RON SWANSON. 438 00:17:26,746 --> 00:17:28,548 WELL, WELCOME TO CASTLE LUDGATE! 439 00:17:28,581 --> 00:17:31,251 - HELLO, MR. LUDGATE. - AGH! CALL ME LARRY. 440 00:17:31,284 --> 00:17:34,121 - LARRY, WHO IS IT? - IT'S ZUZU'S BOSS. 441 00:17:34,154 --> 00:17:36,589 - OHO, RON. RITA LUDGATE. 442 00:17:36,623 --> 00:17:39,859 OH, YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW NICE IT IS TO MEET YOU. 443 00:17:39,892 --> 00:17:42,795 WELL, OH, COME IN, FOR GOSH SAKE. 444 00:17:42,829 --> 00:17:43,763 WHAT CAN I GET YOU TO DRINK? 445 00:17:43,796 --> 00:17:47,200 OOH. COULD YOU TAKE YOUR SHOES OFF, PLEASE? 446 00:17:47,234 --> 00:17:49,569 THANK YOU SO MUCH. 447 00:17:49,602 --> 00:17:50,870 - UH, NOTHING TO DRINK. THANKS. 448 00:17:50,903 --> 00:17:53,640 - OH. - IS APRIL AROUND? 449 00:17:53,673 --> 00:17:56,276 - UH, ZUZU, YOU HAVE A GUEST! 450 00:17:56,309 --> 00:17:57,410 - WELL, I'LL FETCH HER. 451 00:17:57,444 --> 00:18:00,180 SHE'S PROBABLY ON THE INTERNET AGAIN. 452 00:18:00,213 --> 00:18:02,182 - UH, I'LL COME WITH YOU. - OKAY. 453 00:18:02,215 --> 00:18:04,351 - UH, YOU MAKE YOURSELF AT HOME, MR. SWANSON. 454 00:18:04,384 --> 00:18:08,855 - THANK YOU. 455 00:18:08,888 --> 00:18:14,361 YOU MUST BE APRIL'S SISTER. I'M RON. 456 00:18:18,198 --> 00:18:20,633 [clears throat] NICE TO MEET YOU. 457 00:18:20,667 --> 00:18:23,670 - NO OFFENSE, BUT I THINK THE NORMAL GRIEVING TIME 458 00:18:23,703 --> 00:18:27,140 FOR GAZEBO DESTRUCTION HAS PASSED. 459 00:18:27,174 --> 00:18:29,142 - YEAH, WELL, MAYBE THAT'S NOT ENTIRELY 460 00:18:29,176 --> 00:18:31,844 WHAT I'M UPSET ABOUT. 461 00:18:31,878 --> 00:18:34,647 MARK AND ANN ARE GONNA GET MARRIED. 462 00:18:34,681 --> 00:18:38,418 - REALLY? WHY DOES THAT BOTHER YOU? 463 00:18:38,451 --> 00:18:39,786 I SHOULD BE THE ONE THAT'S UPSET. 464 00:18:39,819 --> 00:18:42,789 IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE ME AND ANN, OR ME AND JESSICA, 465 00:18:42,822 --> 00:18:46,793 OR ANN AND JESSICA WITH ME WATCHING. 466 00:18:46,826 --> 00:18:48,761 - EVERY TIME A COUPLE GETS MARRIED, 467 00:18:48,795 --> 00:18:51,564 TWO SINGLE PEOPLE DIE. 468 00:18:51,598 --> 00:18:53,366 I'M ABOUT TO LOSE TWO GOOD FRIENDS. 469 00:18:53,400 --> 00:18:54,467 - COME ON. 470 00:18:54,501 --> 00:18:58,371 THEY DROVE OVER HERE AND CUT YOU DOWN FROM A GATE. 471 00:18:58,405 --> 00:19:00,540 I REALLY DON'T THINK YOU HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT THEM 472 00:19:00,573 --> 00:19:02,409 ABANDONING YOU ONCE YOU GET MARRIED. 473 00:19:02,442 --> 00:19:04,811 - YEAH, YEAH, I KNOW THAT. IN MY BRAIN. 474 00:19:04,844 --> 00:19:06,913 - CAN WE GO? - YEAH. LET'S GO. 475 00:19:06,946 --> 00:19:09,449 I JUST NEED TO GO DO ONE MORE THING. 476 00:19:09,482 --> 00:19:11,818 - AH, COME ON. NO! NO, NO, NO. - YES. 477 00:19:11,851 --> 00:19:14,821 - * LOVING SMILES 478 00:19:14,854 --> 00:19:19,826 * AND SMILING TEARS 479 00:19:19,859 --> 00:19:22,962 * THE MIDNIGHT OF MY HEART 480 00:19:22,995 --> 00:19:26,266 * IS YOU - OKAY, I'M SORRY, EVERYONE. 481 00:19:26,299 --> 00:19:29,802 EXCUSE ME. EXCUSE ME. BUT I NEED TO SAY SOMETHING. 482 00:19:29,836 --> 00:19:31,971 - IS THAT GATE LADY? - YES. 483 00:19:32,004 --> 00:19:33,640 I KNOW YOU'RE PROBABLY THINKING 484 00:19:33,673 --> 00:19:35,808 "THERE'S THAT CRAZY GATE LADY FROM OUTSIDE BACK AGAIN." 485 00:19:35,842 --> 00:19:36,976 AND TO SOME EXTENT, YOU'RE RIGHT. 486 00:19:37,009 --> 00:19:38,445 I AM THE GATE LADY. 487 00:19:38,478 --> 00:19:39,746 BUT THE ONLY THING I'M CRAZY ABOUT 488 00:19:39,779 --> 00:19:41,514 IS LEAVING THE PAST BEHIND. 489 00:19:41,548 --> 00:19:45,852 SO I WOULD LIKE TO APOLOGIZE AND RAISE A GLASS 490 00:19:45,885 --> 00:19:49,789 TO CHANGE, AND FORGIVENESS, AND THE FUTURE, 491 00:19:49,822 --> 00:19:51,958 AND ANN AND MARK, AND HAPPINESS, 492 00:19:51,991 --> 00:19:53,826 AND NICK NEWPORT, SR. 493 00:19:53,860 --> 00:19:57,230 MAY ALL YOUR FUTURE GAZEBOS LIVE LONG AND PROSPER. 494 00:19:57,264 --> 00:19:59,432 - PLEASE LEAVE. 495 00:19:59,466 --> 00:20:01,934 - IS IT WEIRD IF I ASK TO TAKE A PIECE OF CAKE WITH ME? 496 00:20:01,968 --> 00:20:04,337 I WON'T. - GO. 497 00:20:04,371 --> 00:20:07,740 - WHY ARE YOU HERE? 498 00:20:07,774 --> 00:20:10,710 - COME BACK TO WORK. - NO. 499 00:20:10,743 --> 00:20:15,248 - COME BACK. I WANT YOU TO COME BACK. 500 00:20:15,282 --> 00:20:18,551 - WELL, I DON'T WANT TO COME BACK. THE END. 501 00:20:18,585 --> 00:20:20,920 - I WAS TALKING TO ANDY ABOUT YOU. 502 00:20:20,953 --> 00:20:24,691 AND HE MADE ME REALIZE THAT I NEED YOU BACK AT WORK. 503 00:20:24,724 --> 00:20:26,826 - WHAT DID HE SAY? - DON'T RECALL. 504 00:20:26,859 --> 00:20:30,663 - FINE. I'LL COME BACK. - GOOD. 505 00:20:30,697 --> 00:20:33,800 OKAY. I'M LEAVING. 506 00:20:33,833 --> 00:20:37,670 BYE, ZUZU. - BYE, DUKE SILVER. 507 00:20:41,674 --> 00:20:44,277 MY MOM HAS ALL YOUR ALBUMS. 508 00:20:44,311 --> 00:20:46,313 I RECOGNIZED YOU THE DAY WE MET. 509 00:20:46,346 --> 00:20:49,048 - HAVE YOU TOLD ANYONE? - NO. 510 00:20:49,081 --> 00:20:51,918 - GOOD GIRL. 511 00:20:56,022 --> 00:20:56,956 - EXCUSE ME. 512 00:20:56,989 --> 00:20:58,825 I HAD A MEETING WITH RON SWANSON YESTERDAY, 513 00:20:58,858 --> 00:20:59,992 BUT I HAVE A LITTLE CAR TROUBLE. 514 00:21:00,026 --> 00:21:01,694 - SORRY, HE'S BUSY RIGHT NOW. 515 00:21:01,728 --> 00:21:04,564 - OH. UH, WELL, WELL, CAN I RESCHEDULE? 516 00:21:04,597 --> 00:21:08,568 - SURE. HMM. HOW ABOUT JUNE 50TH? 517 00:21:08,601 --> 00:21:09,569 - SORRY? 518 00:21:09,602 --> 00:21:11,971 - DO YOU THINK YOU COULD COME BACK TODAY AT 2:65? 519 00:21:12,004 --> 00:21:14,907 HE'S AVAILABLE THEN. - WHAT IS GOING ON? 520 00:21:14,941 --> 00:21:16,509 - LOOKS LIKE THE ONLY OTHER DAY HE HAS OPEN 521 00:21:16,543 --> 00:21:17,810 IS MARCH-TEMBER ONE-TEENTH. 522 00:21:17,844 --> 00:21:23,316 DOES THAT WORK, SIR? [phone rings] 523 00:21:23,350 --> 00:21:26,353 Captioning by CaptionMax www.captionmax.com