1 00:00:01,602 --> 00:00:04,605 - ANN PERKINS, WHAT'S HAPPENING, SWEETHEART? 2 00:00:04,638 --> 00:00:06,674 - JUST, UH, WAITING FOR APRIL. 3 00:00:06,707 --> 00:00:08,309 SHE'S TAKING CARE OF MY HOUSE WHILE I'M AWAY. 4 00:00:08,342 --> 00:00:11,112 - THAT'S GREAT. HAPPY BELATED VALENTINE'S DAY. 5 00:00:11,145 --> 00:00:12,546 - VALENTINE'S DAY WAS A MONTH AGO. 6 00:00:12,580 --> 00:00:14,148 WHY ARE YOU GIVING IT TO ME NOW? 7 00:00:14,182 --> 00:00:16,517 - WHATEVER. HAPPY EARLY VALENTINE'S DAY. 8 00:00:16,550 --> 00:00:18,352 I SAW THIS AND I THOUGHT OF YOU. 9 00:00:18,386 --> 00:00:21,089 HOPE YOU KEEP THAT SOMEWHERE SPECIAL. 10 00:00:21,122 --> 00:00:23,657 - OKAY, THIS IS ONE OF THOSE NANNY CAM TEDDY BEARS, ISN'T IT? 11 00:00:23,691 --> 00:00:25,059 - WHAT? NO! 12 00:00:25,093 --> 00:00:26,827 IT'S A REGULAR CAMERA-LESS TEDDY BEAR. 13 00:00:26,860 --> 00:00:29,630 JUST PUT IT IN YOUR BEDROOM, DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT. 14 00:00:29,663 --> 00:00:30,664 [scoffs] 15 00:00:30,698 --> 00:00:34,168 IT'S A ROBOT BEAR. IT'S PROGRAMMED TO SNUGGLE. 16 00:00:34,202 --> 00:00:35,503 - I'LL TAKE IT. 17 00:00:35,536 --> 00:00:37,138 - DONNA, THERE'S A CAMERA IN IT. 18 00:00:37,171 --> 00:00:39,707 - I KNOW. 19 00:00:39,740 --> 00:00:42,710 [triumphant music] 20 00:00:42,743 --> 00:00:50,751 * 21 00:01:00,494 --> 00:01:01,795 - ALL RIGHT, THAT'S BASICALLY IT. 22 00:01:01,829 --> 00:01:03,697 WATER THE PLANTS, GET THE MAIL-- 23 00:01:03,731 --> 00:01:04,532 - CAN I READ YOUR MAIL? 24 00:01:04,565 --> 00:01:05,699 - NO, PLEASE DON'T. 25 00:01:05,733 --> 00:01:07,435 - FINE. 26 00:01:07,468 --> 00:01:08,536 - OH, AND, UM... 27 00:01:08,569 --> 00:01:10,538 HERE ARE THE KEYS, AND REMEMBER-- 28 00:01:10,571 --> 00:01:12,573 - I KNOW, DON'T LET TOM MAKE A COPY. 29 00:01:12,606 --> 00:01:14,375 - THAT'S RIGHT, GOOD. 30 00:01:14,408 --> 00:01:17,578 I'M PAYING APRIL 50 BUCKS TO WATCH MY HOUSE WHILE I'M AWAY. 31 00:01:17,611 --> 00:01:18,679 I WOULD HAVE ASKED LESLIE, 32 00:01:18,712 --> 00:01:22,216 BUT I'VE SEEN THE WAY SHE TAKES CARE OF HER HOUSE. 33 00:01:22,250 --> 00:01:23,584 PLUS, THERE'S ALWAYS BEEN 34 00:01:23,617 --> 00:01:25,786 A LITTLE DISTANCE BETWEEN ME AND APRIL. 35 00:01:25,819 --> 00:01:27,588 AND I THOUGHT THIS WOULD MAYBE, I DON'T KNOW, 36 00:01:27,621 --> 00:01:30,191 GIVE US A CHANCE TO GET A LITTLE CLOSER, 37 00:01:30,224 --> 00:01:31,292 MAYBE EVEN-- 38 00:01:31,325 --> 00:01:32,493 - I DON'T LIKE ANN. 39 00:01:32,526 --> 00:01:33,894 - BECOME FRIENDS. 40 00:01:33,927 --> 00:01:35,463 WHO KNOWS? 41 00:01:35,496 --> 00:01:38,666 - LESLIE, THIS IS EVELYN ROWSHLIND 42 00:01:38,699 --> 00:01:39,867 FROM THE MAYOR'S OFFICE. 43 00:01:39,900 --> 00:01:42,403 - OH, HELLO, I'VE ALWAYS DREAMED OF YOU. 44 00:01:42,436 --> 00:01:44,205 - EXCUSE ME? - MEETING YOU. 45 00:01:44,238 --> 00:01:45,539 WHAT CAN I DO FOR YOU? HAVE A SEAT. 46 00:01:45,573 --> 00:01:47,308 - UH, I PREFER TO STAND. - OKAY. 47 00:01:47,341 --> 00:01:49,143 - I HAVE KIND OF AN ODD FAVOR TO ASK. 48 00:01:49,177 --> 00:01:50,778 MAYOR GUNDERSON WAS PLAYING GOLF LAST WEEK 49 00:01:50,811 --> 00:01:53,514 AT PAWNEE MUNICIPAL, AND HE BROUGHT HIS DOG-- 50 00:01:53,547 --> 00:01:54,448 - RUFUS. 51 00:01:54,482 --> 00:01:56,417 WE ALL KNOW RUFUS. EVERYBODY LOVES RUFUS. 52 00:01:56,450 --> 00:01:57,851 HE'S A GREAT DOG. CONTINUE. 53 00:01:57,885 --> 00:02:00,188 - WELL, UH, THEY WERE OUT ON THE SIXTH HOLE 54 00:02:00,221 --> 00:02:01,622 WHEN SUDDENLY, OUT OF NOWHERE-- 55 00:02:01,655 --> 00:02:02,823 - RUFUS WAS BITTEN BY A POSSUM? 56 00:02:02,856 --> 00:02:04,592 - YES, HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT? 57 00:02:04,625 --> 00:02:06,927 - [sigh] IT WAS FAIRWAY FRANK. 58 00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:09,530 FAIRWAY FRANK IS THIS AWFUL POSSUM 59 00:02:09,563 --> 00:02:11,865 WHO LIVES NEAR THE SIXTH HOLE OF THE PUBLIC GOLF COURSE. 60 00:02:11,899 --> 00:02:14,302 AND HE'S ACTUALLY NUMBER THREE ON THE PARKS DEPARTMENT'S 61 00:02:14,335 --> 00:02:15,503 MOST WANTED PESTSLIST. 62 00:02:15,536 --> 00:02:18,639 RIGHT BEHIND THE BATS WHO LIKE TO POOP ON THE BELL TOWER, 63 00:02:18,672 --> 00:02:20,574 AND POOPY, THE RACCOON WHO POOPS 64 00:02:20,608 --> 00:02:22,310 ALL OVER THE HIGH SCHOOL CAFETERIA. 65 00:02:22,343 --> 00:02:24,578 - SHOULDN'T YOU TAKE THIS UP WITH ANIMAL CONTROL? 66 00:02:24,612 --> 00:02:26,514 - LET'S BE HONEST, ANIMAL CONTROL IS NOT 67 00:02:26,547 --> 00:02:28,482 THE MOST EFFECTIVE BRANCH OF OUR GOVERNMENT. 68 00:02:28,516 --> 00:02:29,750 - THEY'RE A BUNCH OF BURNED-OUT MORONS. 69 00:02:29,783 --> 00:02:31,252 - WELL, YOU HAVE THE REPUTATION 70 00:02:31,285 --> 00:02:32,520 AS A PERSON WHO GETS THINGS DONE. 71 00:02:32,553 --> 00:02:35,623 SO WE'D LIKE YOU TO FORM A LITTLE TASK FORCE, 72 00:02:35,656 --> 00:02:37,258 FIND THE ANIMAL, AND PUT IT DOWN. 73 00:02:37,291 --> 00:02:38,259 - TASK FORCE? 74 00:02:38,292 --> 00:02:39,293 - NEEDLESS TO SAY, 75 00:02:39,327 --> 00:02:40,594 THE MAYOR WILL BE VERY GRATEFUL FOR YOUR HELP. 76 00:02:40,628 --> 00:02:42,896 - MA'AM, THE NEXT TIME WE SPEAK, 77 00:02:42,930 --> 00:02:45,633 WE SHALL BE DANCING ON THE GRAVE OF A POSSUM. 78 00:02:45,666 --> 00:02:46,800 - GREAT. 79 00:02:46,834 --> 00:02:48,536 - RON WILL SHOW YOU AROUND. 80 00:02:48,569 --> 00:02:52,373 - UM, RIGHT THIS WAY IS THE EXIT. 81 00:02:52,406 --> 00:02:53,641 - YO, POLICE. 82 00:02:53,674 --> 00:02:55,576 - AH, HA HA, NO, YOU'RE NOT. 83 00:02:55,609 --> 00:02:56,644 COFFEE? [gasp] 84 00:02:56,677 --> 00:02:57,711 - YUP. 85 00:02:57,745 --> 00:02:58,879 - YOU ALWAYS KNOW WHAT TO BRING ME. 86 00:02:58,912 --> 00:03:00,781 - I ONLY EVER BRING YOU COFFEE. 87 00:03:00,814 --> 00:03:04,918 - AND IT IS MY VERY FAVORITE NON-ALCOHOLIC HOT DRINK, 88 00:03:04,952 --> 00:03:06,620 EXCEPT FOR HOT TEA. 89 00:03:06,654 --> 00:03:09,290 AND HOT ORANGE JUICE, WEIRDLY DELICIOUS. 90 00:03:09,323 --> 00:03:11,225 ANYWAYS, THANK YOU SO MUCH. I NEEDED IT. 91 00:03:11,259 --> 00:03:13,694 I GOT A REALLY BAD CASE OF SHOE SHINE HEAD TODAY. 92 00:03:13,727 --> 00:03:15,663 - ANDY RECENTLY DIAGNOSED HIMSELF 93 00:03:15,696 --> 00:03:18,899 WITH WHAT HE CALLS "SHOE SHINE HEAD." 94 00:03:18,932 --> 00:03:21,369 IT'S WHEN YOU SHINE TOO MANY SHOES 95 00:03:21,402 --> 00:03:23,003 AND THE FUMES CREATE 96 00:03:23,036 --> 00:03:25,706 A THUNDERSTORM IN YOUR BRAIN. 97 00:03:25,739 --> 00:03:30,311 CURES INCLUDE COFFEE, CHEESEBURGERS, 98 00:03:30,344 --> 00:03:33,381 AND NAPPING ON THE FLOOR. 99 00:03:33,414 --> 00:03:36,284 - MARK BRENDANAWICZ. 100 00:03:36,317 --> 00:03:37,618 - HEY, RON. WHAT'S UP? 101 00:03:37,651 --> 00:03:40,521 - I HAVE A WOOD SHOP 102 00:03:40,554 --> 00:03:42,323 AND I'M PLANNING A LITTLE EXPANSION. 103 00:03:42,356 --> 00:03:44,292 NEED MY BUDDY MARK, THE CITY PLANNER, 104 00:03:44,325 --> 00:03:46,660 TO SIGN OFF ON THE PLANS. 105 00:03:46,694 --> 00:03:48,662 - SURE, I JUST NEED TO SCHEDULE AN INSPECTION. 106 00:03:48,696 --> 00:03:49,997 - THAT'S NOT REALLY NECESSARY. 107 00:03:50,030 --> 00:03:51,532 - YES, IT IS, BUT YOU'LL BE FINE 108 00:03:51,565 --> 00:03:53,801 AS LONG AS YOU DON'T HAVE ANY CODE VIOLATIONS. 109 00:03:53,834 --> 00:03:58,238 YOU DON'T HAVE ANY CODE VIOLATIONS, DO YOU? 110 00:04:02,343 --> 00:04:03,611 - NOPE. 111 00:04:05,313 --> 00:04:06,447 [knocking on door] 112 00:04:06,480 --> 00:04:07,748 - EUGENE! 113 00:04:07,781 --> 00:04:09,750 BOY, WE HAVE A REALLY IMPORTANT JOB FOR YOU. 114 00:04:09,783 --> 00:04:11,619 - WE'LL GET TO IT FIRST THING MONDAY. 115 00:04:11,652 --> 00:04:13,020 - TODAY'S WEDNESDAY. 116 00:04:13,053 --> 00:04:14,788 LOOK, THIS IS NOT A REQUEST. 117 00:04:14,822 --> 00:04:16,457 - WE'RE ACTING UNDER DIRECT ORDERS 118 00:04:16,490 --> 00:04:17,558 FROM MAYOR GUNDERSON'S DOG. 119 00:04:17,591 --> 00:04:18,659 - OFFICE. 120 00:04:18,692 --> 00:04:20,561 I NEED YOUR TWO BEST GUYS TO JOIN ME 121 00:04:20,594 --> 00:04:21,862 AND BE PART OF MY TASK FORCE. 122 00:04:21,895 --> 00:04:24,798 - THAT WOULD BE HARRIS AND BRETT. 123 00:04:24,832 --> 00:04:26,967 BUT THEY'RE NOT HERE. 124 00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:28,469 - ISN'T THAT THEM THERE? 125 00:04:28,502 --> 00:04:29,470 - NOPE. 126 00:04:29,503 --> 00:04:30,504 - HEY, BRETT. 127 00:04:30,538 --> 00:04:31,705 - YEAH. - DUDE! 128 00:04:31,739 --> 00:04:34,775 - LISTEN, THAT STUPID POSSUM IS ON THE GOLF COURSE AGAIN. 129 00:04:34,808 --> 00:04:36,410 WOULD YOU RATHER I CAPTURE IT MYSELF 130 00:04:36,444 --> 00:04:37,745 AND THEN JUST CALL YOU SO YOU CAN COME AND PICK IT UP? 131 00:04:37,778 --> 00:04:38,812 - OKAY. 132 00:04:38,846 --> 00:04:40,614 - [sighs] 133 00:04:40,648 --> 00:04:41,782 HEY, GUYS. 134 00:04:41,815 --> 00:04:43,384 AW, COOL! HEY, YOU WANT YOUR BALL BACK? 135 00:04:43,417 --> 00:04:45,653 WANT YOUR BALL BACK? COME WITH ME. 136 00:04:45,686 --> 00:04:47,888 - AW, MAN. 137 00:04:47,921 --> 00:04:49,957 - HOW YOU KNOW MY NAME, HOMIE? 138 00:04:49,990 --> 00:04:51,659 - STOP, MAN. - STOP HANGING YOURSELF. 139 00:04:51,692 --> 00:04:52,626 - I'M GONNA HANG YOURSELF. 140 00:04:52,660 --> 00:04:53,927 - STOP HANGING YOURSELF. 141 00:04:53,961 --> 00:04:55,996 - QUITE A CRACK TEAM YOU'VE ASSEMBLED, LESLIE. 142 00:04:56,029 --> 00:04:57,631 - YEAH, WELL THERE'S FIVE OF US AND ONLY ONE POSSUM. 143 00:04:57,665 --> 00:04:58,766 HOW HARD CAN IT BE? 144 00:04:58,799 --> 00:05:01,435 - EXCUSE US, TASK FORCE COMING THROUGH. 145 00:05:02,736 --> 00:05:04,838 TASK FORCE CLEAR, RESUME GOLFING. 146 00:05:04,872 --> 00:05:06,674 - I USED TO LOVE TIGER WOODS 147 00:05:06,707 --> 00:05:08,509 BECAUSE HE WAS A GREAT CHAMPION. 148 00:05:08,542 --> 00:05:11,779 BUT AFTER THAT SEX SCANDAL, THE MAN IS A GOD. 149 00:05:13,614 --> 00:05:15,015 [knocking on door] 150 00:05:15,048 --> 00:05:17,918 - HEY, MARK. WELCOME TO MY HAVEN. 151 00:05:17,951 --> 00:05:19,119 - THANK YOU. 152 00:05:19,152 --> 00:05:20,621 - YOU'RE THE FIRST NON-ME TO SET FOOT 153 00:05:20,654 --> 00:05:22,356 IN THIS BUILDING IN TEN YEARS. 154 00:05:22,390 --> 00:05:25,559 - UM, RON, NONE OF THIS IS UP TO CODE. 155 00:05:25,593 --> 00:05:28,862 - SURE IT IS. IT'S UP TO THE SWANSON CODE. 156 00:05:28,896 --> 00:05:29,997 - THERE'S NO DRAINAGE, 157 00:05:30,030 --> 00:05:31,699 DOESN'T SEEM TO BE ANY VENTILATION, 158 00:05:31,732 --> 00:05:34,101 YOU'VE GOT HAZARDOUS CHEMICALS OVER HERE. 159 00:05:34,134 --> 00:05:35,769 - YEAH, WHICH ONLY I AM BREATHING. 160 00:05:35,803 --> 00:05:37,405 IT'S THE SAME LIBERTY THAT GIVES ME 161 00:05:37,438 --> 00:05:39,006 THE RIGHT TO FART IN MY OWN CAR. 162 00:05:39,039 --> 00:05:40,608 ARE YOU GONNA TELL A MAN 163 00:05:40,641 --> 00:05:42,443 THAT HE CAN'T FART IN HIS OWN CAR? 164 00:05:42,476 --> 00:05:44,712 - THERE IS A BASKET OF OIL-SOAKED RAGS 165 00:05:44,745 --> 00:05:47,080 ABOVE A WOOD BURNING STOVE. 166 00:05:47,114 --> 00:05:48,849 - OH, GOOD THING I'VE GOT A FIRE EXTINGUISHER. 167 00:05:48,882 --> 00:05:50,618 WHICH, I CAN ASSURE YOU, 168 00:05:50,651 --> 00:05:53,687 IS TOTALLY UP TO YOUR PRECIOUS CODE. 169 00:05:53,721 --> 00:05:59,026 - UM, THIS SAYS IT SHOULD BE RECHARGED JUNE OF 1996. 170 00:05:59,059 --> 00:06:00,728 - THOSE DATES ARE ARBITRARY. 171 00:06:00,761 --> 00:06:02,963 THEY'RE LIKE THOSE EXPIRATION DATES THAT THE GOVERNMENT 172 00:06:02,996 --> 00:06:05,833 FORCES COMPANIES TO PUT ON YOGURT AND MEDICINE. 173 00:06:05,866 --> 00:06:07,568 OBSERVE. WATCH YOURSELF. 174 00:06:07,601 --> 00:06:09,470 - YEAH. 175 00:06:12,440 --> 00:06:14,642 - OKAY, I'LL REPLACE THIS. 176 00:06:14,675 --> 00:06:15,776 HAPPY? 177 00:06:15,809 --> 00:06:17,611 - HOW LONG DO YOU THINK 178 00:06:17,645 --> 00:06:18,812 IT WOULD TAKE ME TO LEARN GOLF, LESLIE? 179 00:06:18,846 --> 00:06:21,449 - I COULD TEACH YOU. I HAVE A 16 HANDICAP. 180 00:06:21,482 --> 00:06:22,716 BUT YOU KNOW, IT TAKES A LOT OF PRACTICE. 181 00:06:22,750 --> 00:06:24,151 YOU HAVE TO GET UP EARLY, HIT THE RANGE, 182 00:06:24,184 --> 00:06:25,453 PRACTICE READING GREENS. 183 00:06:25,486 --> 00:06:26,754 - SEE, I DON'T WANNA DO ALL THAT. 184 00:06:26,787 --> 00:06:28,822 I THINK I JUST WANT SOME OF THOSE DOPE PANTS. 185 00:06:28,856 --> 00:06:30,791 - [gasps] OH MY GOD! 186 00:06:30,824 --> 00:06:32,059 OH, MY GOD, IT'S FAIRWAY FRANK! 187 00:06:32,092 --> 00:06:34,662 WOW, OKAY, UM... ALL RIGHT, TOM? 188 00:06:34,695 --> 00:06:36,630 I WANT YOU TO VERY SLOWLY-- 189 00:06:42,770 --> 00:06:46,474 - 25, 26, 27, 28 VIOLATIONS. 190 00:06:46,507 --> 00:06:49,710 - COME ON, BRENDANAWICZ. RELAX. 191 00:06:49,743 --> 00:06:52,145 LET ME MAKE YOU A CANOE. 192 00:06:52,179 --> 00:06:53,847 - UH, WELL, I DON'T NEED A CANOE, RON. 193 00:06:53,881 --> 00:06:56,550 I NEED YOU TO FIX THIS PLACE UP. 194 00:06:56,584 --> 00:06:59,653 SO... I'LL GIVE YOU 24 HOURS. 195 00:07:09,697 --> 00:07:13,166 - OKAY, WE MAY ONLY GET ONE CHANCE TO CATCH THIS THING, 196 00:07:13,200 --> 00:07:14,635 SO WE HAVE TO PLAY IT SMART. 197 00:07:14,668 --> 00:07:16,670 YOU TWO FLANK THE LEFT, I'LL FLANK THE RIGHT, 198 00:07:16,704 --> 00:07:17,871 ANDY WILL COME IN THROUGH-- 199 00:07:17,905 --> 00:07:21,775 [screaming] 200 00:07:21,809 --> 00:07:24,845 - ANDY! - I GOT IT. 201 00:07:24,878 --> 00:07:25,846 - OH, MY-- 202 00:07:25,879 --> 00:07:26,814 - HA HA! I GOT HIM. 203 00:07:26,847 --> 00:07:27,815 - TASK FORCE! ENGAGE! 204 00:07:27,848 --> 00:07:28,816 - HE'S GOT IT. - I GOT HIM. 205 00:07:28,849 --> 00:07:29,817 - HE'S GOOD. 206 00:07:29,850 --> 00:07:31,151 - COME ON, YOU COWARDS! 207 00:07:31,184 --> 00:07:33,086 LEMME SEE HIS FACE. LEMME SEE HIS FACE. 208 00:07:33,120 --> 00:07:34,722 IT'S HIM! IT'S HIM, WE GOT HIM! 209 00:07:34,755 --> 00:07:36,123 - IT'S OKAY. HE'S ON MY NECK. 210 00:07:36,156 --> 00:07:37,758 - OKAY, OKAY, OKAY, OKAY! - HE'S ON MY NECK. 211 00:07:37,791 --> 00:07:38,692 - IT'S ALL RIGHT, IT'S ALL RIGHT, IT'S ALL RIGHT. 212 00:07:38,726 --> 00:07:40,193 - HE'S ON MY NECK. - ALL RIGHT, IT'S OKAY. 213 00:07:40,227 --> 00:07:42,095 YOU'RE NEXT, POOPY. 214 00:07:42,129 --> 00:07:43,631 - VERY IMPRESSIVE, LESLIE. 215 00:07:43,664 --> 00:07:45,733 - AW, THANK YOU. I HAD A GREAT TASK FORCE. 216 00:07:45,766 --> 00:07:47,635 I WAS JUST THE SIMPLE MASTERMIND 217 00:07:47,668 --> 00:07:48,669 WHO PLANNED THE WHOLE OPERATION 218 00:07:48,702 --> 00:07:49,770 AND EXECUTED IT TO PERFECTION. 219 00:07:49,803 --> 00:07:52,740 THIS IS ANDY DWYER. HE ACTUALLY CAUGHT THE THING. 220 00:07:52,773 --> 00:07:54,174 - MR. DWYER-- - PLEASE... 221 00:07:54,207 --> 00:07:56,710 MY FRIENDS CALL ME ANDY RADICAL. 222 00:07:56,744 --> 00:07:58,111 - NO, WE DON'T. 223 00:07:58,145 --> 00:08:01,248 - BY DAY, ANDY DWYER, SHOESHINE-IST. 224 00:08:01,281 --> 00:08:04,785 BY DIFFERENT TIME OF DAY, ANDY RADICAL, POSSUM TACKLER. 225 00:08:04,818 --> 00:08:07,287 AND BY NIGHT... 226 00:08:07,320 --> 00:08:09,222 I DO WHATEVER I WANT, NO JOB. 227 00:08:09,256 --> 00:08:11,725 - WE THINK THAT THIS IS A GREAT P.R. OPPORTUNITY 228 00:08:11,759 --> 00:08:13,794 SO WE'VE ARRANGED FOR A REPORTER FROM THE JOURNAL 229 00:08:13,827 --> 00:08:16,597 TO STOP BY TO INTERVIEW, GET SOME PICTURES OF THE TEAM. 230 00:08:16,630 --> 00:08:18,131 - TASK FORCE. GREAT. 231 00:08:18,165 --> 00:08:19,967 - AND NEXT TIME YOU NEED A SPECIAL FAVOR 232 00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:22,269 FROM THE MAYOR'S OFFICE, GIVE ME A CALL. 233 00:08:22,302 --> 00:08:26,173 - OH, MY GOD, I WILL. I NEED SO MANY SPECIAL FAVORS. 234 00:08:26,206 --> 00:08:27,741 WHICH ONE SHOULD I CHOOSE? 235 00:08:27,775 --> 00:08:28,876 - WELL, YOU DON'T HAVE TO CHOOSE RIGHT-- 236 00:08:28,909 --> 00:08:29,943 - HOW ABOUT AN EXTRA RECYCLING CAN? 237 00:08:29,977 --> 00:08:30,978 NO. 238 00:08:31,011 --> 00:08:32,646 LAMINATED BUS PASS? NO. 239 00:08:32,680 --> 00:08:34,014 WHAT TIME DO YOU USUALLY GO TO SLEEP? 240 00:08:34,047 --> 00:08:35,783 'CAUSE MY BEST IDEAS USUALLY COME TO ME AT NIGHT. 241 00:08:35,816 --> 00:08:37,150 - LET'S STICK TO BUSINESS HOURS, SHALL WE? 242 00:08:37,184 --> 00:08:38,151 - YEAH, ALL RIGHT. 243 00:08:38,185 --> 00:08:40,688 - SEE YOU IN HELL, BUDDY. 244 00:08:46,660 --> 00:08:48,729 - AM I SURE THE POSSUM WE CAUGHT IS FAIRWAY FRANK? 245 00:08:48,762 --> 00:08:49,730 YES. 246 00:08:49,763 --> 00:08:51,632 AM I QUITE SURE? NO. 247 00:08:51,665 --> 00:08:53,033 AM I SURE ENOUGH? MAYBE. 248 00:08:53,066 --> 00:08:54,868 IF IT WASN'T FAIRWAY FRANK, WOULD I FEEL BADLY? 249 00:08:54,902 --> 00:08:55,869 OF COURSE. 250 00:08:55,903 --> 00:08:56,937 COULD I LIVE WITH MYSELF? 251 00:08:56,970 --> 00:08:58,105 THAT DEPENDS. 252 00:08:58,138 --> 00:08:59,907 AS A CITY OFFICIAL IT'S IMPORTANT 253 00:08:59,940 --> 00:09:02,042 THAT I ASK MYSELF A LOT OF QUESTIONS. 254 00:09:02,075 --> 00:09:04,044 DOES DOING SO HELP ME MAKE DECISIONS? 255 00:09:04,077 --> 00:09:08,181 UH... 256 00:09:08,215 --> 00:09:09,216 - OH, HEY, SHAUNA. - HI, LESLIE. 257 00:09:09,249 --> 00:09:10,117 - HI! 258 00:09:10,150 --> 00:09:11,752 ANDY, YOU REMEMBER SHAUNA MALWAE-TWEEP 259 00:09:11,785 --> 00:09:12,753 FROM THE PAWNEEJOURNAL. 260 00:09:12,786 --> 00:09:13,754 - HOW COULD I FORGET? 261 00:09:13,787 --> 00:09:15,155 YOU WROTE THE ARTICLE WHEN I FELL IN THE PIT. 262 00:09:15,188 --> 00:09:16,189 AND THEN AFTERWARDS 263 00:09:16,223 --> 00:09:17,224 HAD SEX WITH MARK, 264 00:09:17,257 --> 00:09:18,759 AND EVERYONE TALKED ABOUT IT. 265 00:09:21,862 --> 00:09:24,798 - SO YOU'RE ON THE GOLF COURSE, AND YOU SEE FAIRWAY FRANK. 266 00:09:24,832 --> 00:09:27,801 - WELL, WE SEE A POSSUM THAT WE BELIEVE TO BE FAIRWAY FRANK. 267 00:09:27,835 --> 00:09:29,637 SO FOR RIGHT NOW, LET'S JUST REFER TO IT AS 268 00:09:29,670 --> 00:09:30,570 A POSSUM. 269 00:09:30,604 --> 00:09:32,239 - LET ME EXPLAIN SOMETHING TO YOU, TWEEP. 270 00:09:32,272 --> 00:09:34,742 WHEN YOU'RE IN A SITUATION, 271 00:09:34,775 --> 00:09:37,177 YOU DON'T HAVE TIME TO THINK. 272 00:09:37,210 --> 00:09:40,681 SO I THOUGHT TO MYSELF, 273 00:09:40,714 --> 00:09:42,916 "DON'T THINK, ANDY. ACT." 274 00:09:42,950 --> 00:09:45,018 - SO YOU WEREN'T THINKING. 275 00:09:45,052 --> 00:09:46,954 - NOT AT ALL. 276 00:09:46,987 --> 00:09:49,857 I CANNOT EMPHASIZE ENOUGH HOW LITTLE I WAS THINKING. 277 00:09:49,890 --> 00:09:50,858 - WERE YOU SCARED? 278 00:09:50,891 --> 00:09:52,993 - NO, NO, I WASN'T. 279 00:09:53,026 --> 00:09:55,262 WELL, I, UH, I LIVED IN THE PIT 280 00:09:55,295 --> 00:09:56,930 FOR THE BETTER PART OF LAST YEAR 281 00:09:56,964 --> 00:10:00,634 AND MADE SOME VERMIN FRIENDS. 282 00:10:00,668 --> 00:10:02,135 UM, YOU KNOW WHAT? FRIENDS SOUNDS STUPID. 283 00:10:02,169 --> 00:10:04,672 COLLEAGUES. 284 00:10:04,705 --> 00:10:07,775 UH, THEY ARE BAD AT SHARING, 285 00:10:07,808 --> 00:10:09,677 BUT THEY ARE GOOD AT TAG. 286 00:10:09,710 --> 00:10:11,779 - WELL, YOUR FAMILY MUST BE VERY PROUD. 287 00:10:11,812 --> 00:10:13,213 WHAT DOES YOUR GIRLFRIEND THINK? 288 00:10:13,246 --> 00:10:14,214 UH, THE NURSE? 289 00:10:14,247 --> 00:10:17,751 - UH, I BROKE UP WITH ANN. 290 00:10:17,785 --> 00:10:18,551 - HMM. - YEAH. 291 00:10:18,585 --> 00:10:19,552 SHORTLY AFTER SHE KICKED ME OUT 292 00:10:19,586 --> 00:10:22,022 AND TOLD ME WE WOULDN'T BE TOGETHER ANYMORE. 293 00:10:22,055 --> 00:10:26,694 - WELL, MAYBE THIS ARTICLE WILL CHANGE HER MIND. 294 00:10:26,727 --> 00:10:28,261 - WHAT NOW? 295 00:10:28,295 --> 00:10:29,730 I HADN'T EVEN THOUGHT OF THAT. 296 00:10:29,763 --> 00:10:31,699 [chuckles] WOW. 297 00:10:31,732 --> 00:10:35,168 OF ALL THE THINGS I THOUGHT WOULD BRING US BACK TOGETHER, 298 00:10:35,202 --> 00:10:38,872 CATCHING A POSSUM WAS NEVER ON THAT LIST. 299 00:10:40,741 --> 00:10:43,176 - WELL, LET'S GO TAKE SOME PICTURES OF FAIRWAY FRANK. 300 00:10:43,210 --> 00:10:45,145 - OF THE POSSUM. 301 00:10:46,980 --> 00:10:49,182 - SERIOUSLY, MAN, WHEN YOU WEAR THESE CLOTHES, 302 00:10:49,216 --> 00:10:51,752 YOU JUST FEEL BETTER THAN EVERYONE ELSE. 303 00:10:51,785 --> 00:10:53,787 YOU KNOW? - YEAH. 304 00:10:53,821 --> 00:10:55,388 - [knocking] BUSY? 305 00:10:55,422 --> 00:10:56,824 - NO, WHAT'S UP? 306 00:10:56,857 --> 00:10:58,391 - JUST WANTED TO TELL YOU, 307 00:10:58,425 --> 00:11:01,228 I UNDERSTAND THAT CITY CODES EXIST 308 00:11:01,261 --> 00:11:03,430 AND I KNOW WHY THEY EXIST. 309 00:11:03,463 --> 00:11:06,700 AND I UNDERSTAND THAT YOU ENFORCE THEM. 310 00:11:06,734 --> 00:11:07,735 - OKAY. 311 00:11:07,768 --> 00:11:08,969 - OKAY, GOOD TALK. 312 00:11:09,002 --> 00:11:10,804 CAN YOU SIGN OFF ON MY PLANS NOW? 313 00:11:10,838 --> 00:11:14,107 - DID YOU GET EVERYTHING UP TO CODE? 314 00:11:19,780 --> 00:11:20,881 - YUP. - NO, YOU DIDN'T. 315 00:11:20,914 --> 00:11:23,016 YOU CLEARLY DIDN'T. 316 00:11:23,050 --> 00:11:25,285 - IT'S MY PROPERTY, MY LAND, 317 00:11:25,318 --> 00:11:26,887 MY SHOP! 318 00:11:26,920 --> 00:11:29,489 - OOH, TUMMY NEEDS A BANANA, YOU GUYS GOOD? 319 00:11:29,522 --> 00:11:32,793 - RON, YOU'RE ASKING ME TO DO A BAD JOB, AT MY JOB, 320 00:11:32,826 --> 00:11:34,928 AND I'M JUST NOT GONNA DO THAT. 321 00:11:34,962 --> 00:11:35,863 SO IF YOU DON'T MIND, 322 00:11:35,896 --> 00:11:39,800 WOULD YOU PLEASE JUST GET OUT OF MY OFFICE? 323 00:11:39,833 --> 00:11:42,069 - OOH, SILLY ME, THERE WAS THIS LITTLE 324 00:11:42,102 --> 00:11:44,805 POM-POM ON MY GLOVE AND IT FELL OFF. 325 00:11:44,838 --> 00:11:45,739 HAVE YOU SEEN IT? 326 00:11:45,773 --> 00:11:46,573 COULD YOU HELP ME LOOK FOR IT REAL QUICK? 327 00:11:46,606 --> 00:11:48,175 IT SHOULD BE ON THE GROUND SOMEWHERE 328 00:11:48,208 --> 00:11:49,943 WHERE I WAS PUTTIN' IT UP. 329 00:11:49,977 --> 00:11:51,711 LET'S SEE. 330 00:11:52,545 --> 00:11:53,781 - SO HOW'S YOUR HOLE? 331 00:11:53,814 --> 00:11:54,815 - EXCUSE ME? 332 00:11:54,848 --> 00:11:56,249 - THE PIT. LOT 48? 333 00:11:56,283 --> 00:11:58,451 - OH, WE'RE MAKING REALLY GOOD PROGRESS ON THE PARK. 334 00:11:58,485 --> 00:12:01,488 IN FACT, THERE MAY BE SOME BIG NEWS ON THAT FRONT COMING SOON. 335 00:12:01,521 --> 00:12:05,759 ALL BECAUSE OF THIS VERY IMPORTANT BUSINESS CARD. 336 00:12:05,793 --> 00:12:07,227 SO THIS ISN'T REALLY A BIG STORY, RIGHT? 337 00:12:07,260 --> 00:12:08,929 NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS VERY MUCH. 338 00:12:08,962 --> 00:12:10,798 - WELL, FAIRWAY FRANK DID BITE THE MAYOR'S DOG, 339 00:12:10,831 --> 00:12:13,533 SO THIS COULD BE ON THE FRONT PAGE. 340 00:12:13,566 --> 00:12:16,203 - * FAIRWAY FRANK, YOU'RE GONNA DIE * 341 00:12:16,236 --> 00:12:19,840 * YOU'RE GONNA FRY, OH, YEAH * 342 00:12:19,873 --> 00:12:23,811 * YOU GUILTY SON-OF-A-BITCH * 343 00:12:23,844 --> 00:12:28,148 * YOU'RE GONNA FRY WHEN THEY FLIP THAT SWITCH * 344 00:12:30,884 --> 00:12:31,684 - HEY, APRIL, CAN I TALK TO YOU 345 00:12:31,718 --> 00:12:33,286 ABOUT THIS SITUATION WITH THE POSSUM? 346 00:12:33,320 --> 00:12:34,421 - NO. 347 00:12:34,454 --> 00:12:36,189 - OKAY, HYPOTHETICALLY, IF YOU WERE GOING ON A MISSION 348 00:12:36,223 --> 00:12:38,458 TO, SAY, CATCH A GUILTY WHALE. 349 00:12:38,491 --> 00:12:40,794 AND WHILE YOU WERE CATCHING THE WHALE 350 00:12:40,828 --> 00:12:43,430 YOU SAW SOMETHING ELSE THAT MAY ALSO BE ANOTHER WHALE, 351 00:12:43,463 --> 00:12:44,431 AND YOU WERE LIKE, "WHAT?" 352 00:12:44,464 --> 00:12:45,933 BUT THEN YOU THOUGHT, MAYBE IT'S NOT A WHALE? 353 00:12:45,966 --> 00:12:47,300 MAYBE IT'S A BIG FISH. 354 00:12:47,334 --> 00:12:48,535 MAYBE IT'S A SUBMARINE WITH A FACE PAINTED ON IT. 355 00:12:48,568 --> 00:12:49,536 THE POINT IS, 356 00:12:49,569 --> 00:12:51,104 IF I KILL THE FIRST WHALE, 357 00:12:51,138 --> 00:12:52,505 AM I TECHNICALLY A MURDERER? 358 00:12:52,539 --> 00:12:54,041 - I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT. 359 00:12:54,074 --> 00:12:56,276 - I SAW A SECOND POSSUM. 360 00:12:56,309 --> 00:12:58,478 THERE WAS ANOTHER POSSUM. 361 00:12:58,511 --> 00:13:01,048 - WAIT, ANDY'S IN THERE TALKING TO A REPORTER, 362 00:13:01,081 --> 00:13:03,416 LITERALLY KISSING HIS OWN BICEPS. 363 00:13:03,450 --> 00:13:04,451 YOU'RE TELLING ME HE MIGHT NOT BE A HERO, 364 00:13:04,484 --> 00:13:05,318 BUT JUST SOME JERK 365 00:13:05,352 --> 00:13:08,455 THAT GOES AROUND TACKLING RANDOM POSSUMS? 366 00:13:08,488 --> 00:13:10,023 NO, I'VE GOTTA HELP LESLIE FIND THE TRUTH. 367 00:13:10,057 --> 00:13:12,559 NOT BECAUSE I'M PISSED AT ANDY, WHICH I'M NOT. 368 00:13:12,592 --> 00:13:17,097 BECAUSE I CARE SO DEEPLY ABOUT POSSUMS. 369 00:13:18,531 --> 00:13:20,500 'CAUSE THEY'RE SO ADORABLE. 370 00:13:20,533 --> 00:13:24,571 - APRIL, DID YOU SEE MY PHOTO SHOOT? 371 00:13:24,604 --> 00:13:25,805 I THINK I NAILED IT. 372 00:13:25,839 --> 00:13:28,441 I FELL OFF THE STOOL ONCE WHEN I WAS TRYING TO LOOK SERIOUS. 373 00:13:28,475 --> 00:13:30,177 BUT I'M OKAY. 374 00:13:30,210 --> 00:13:32,880 - THAT'S COOL, UM, I'M REALLY HAPPY FOR YOU. 375 00:13:32,913 --> 00:13:36,249 - YOU ARE? 376 00:13:36,283 --> 00:13:38,952 MAN, OUR HAPPY REACTIONS ARE SUPER DIFFERENT. 377 00:13:38,986 --> 00:13:41,354 SO, UH, HE SAID HE'S GONNA EMAIL ME 378 00:13:41,388 --> 00:13:42,489 THE PHOTOS IN, LIKE, SIX HOURS. 379 00:13:42,522 --> 00:13:44,157 YOU WANNA WAIT WITH ME? 380 00:13:44,191 --> 00:13:45,893 - UM, YEAH, THAT SOUNDS GOOD, 381 00:13:45,926 --> 00:13:47,627 BUT I CAN'T BECAUSE I HAVE TO GO 382 00:13:47,660 --> 00:13:49,296 DO SOMETHING THAT ACTUALLY MATTERS. 383 00:13:53,600 --> 00:13:54,902 - FAIRWAY FRANK'S BEEN HAUNTING 384 00:13:54,935 --> 00:13:56,236 THE SIXTH HOLE FOR A WHILE NOW. 385 00:13:56,269 --> 00:13:57,237 YOU MUST KNOW HIM PRETTY WELL. 386 00:13:57,270 --> 00:13:58,939 - I SURE DO. 387 00:13:58,972 --> 00:14:00,173 I'VE CHASED THAT LITTLE SUCKER OFF 388 00:14:00,207 --> 00:14:03,043 MORE TIMES THAN I CAN COUNT. 389 00:14:03,076 --> 00:14:04,577 - CAN YOU JUST TAKE A LOOK AT THESE PHOTOS 390 00:14:04,611 --> 00:14:07,480 AND MAKE SURE THAT IT'S FAIRWAY FRANK? 391 00:14:07,514 --> 00:14:10,283 - YUP, THAT'S HIM. 392 00:14:10,317 --> 00:14:12,452 - MR. CAMPOPIANO, THOSE ARE PHOTOS 393 00:14:12,485 --> 00:14:15,355 OF THREE DIFFERENT POSSUMS. 394 00:14:15,388 --> 00:14:17,057 - HUH. 395 00:14:17,090 --> 00:14:20,393 YOU GUYS WANT SOMETHING TO DRINK? 396 00:14:20,427 --> 00:14:21,528 - HEY, BOSS, THERE'S A POSSUM 397 00:14:21,561 --> 00:14:23,496 WANDERING AROUND ON THE 14TH GREEN. 398 00:14:23,530 --> 00:14:25,132 SHOULD I CALL ANIMAL CONTROL AGAIN? 399 00:14:25,165 --> 00:14:27,467 - YUP. 400 00:14:27,500 --> 00:14:30,570 - OH, MY GOD, THOSE IDIOTS ARE HERE FROM ANIMAL CONTROL. 401 00:14:30,603 --> 00:14:31,438 THEY'RE GONNA TAKE IT AWAY. 402 00:14:31,471 --> 00:14:33,106 OKAY, WE NEED A LITTLE BIT MORE TIME 403 00:14:33,140 --> 00:14:34,141 TO FIGURE OUT THE TRUTH. 404 00:14:34,174 --> 00:14:35,175 LOOK, I HAVE AN IDEA. 405 00:14:35,208 --> 00:14:36,409 I'M GONNA DISTRACT EVERYBODY, 406 00:14:36,443 --> 00:14:37,577 AND THEN YOU GET THAT POSSUM OUT OF HERE. 407 00:14:37,610 --> 00:14:38,611 CAN YOU DO THAT, APRIL? 408 00:14:38,645 --> 00:14:39,446 APRIL, CAN YOU DO THAT? 409 00:14:39,479 --> 00:14:40,647 CAN YOU GET THE POSSUM OUT OF HERE? 410 00:14:40,680 --> 00:14:42,282 CAN YOU SNEAK IT OUT OF HERE? 411 00:14:42,315 --> 00:14:43,416 APRIL, CAN YOU DO IT? CAN YOU DO IT? 412 00:14:43,450 --> 00:14:44,484 PLEASE, APRIL, TELL ME YOU CAN DO THIS. 413 00:14:44,517 --> 00:14:46,686 - YES, YES, I CAN DO IT. GOD. 414 00:14:46,719 --> 00:14:48,655 - I CAN'T KILL THE POSSUM BECAUSE IT MIGHT BE INNOCENT. 415 00:14:48,688 --> 00:14:51,591 I CAN'T LET THE POSSUM GO BECAUSE IT MIGHT BE GUILTY. 416 00:14:51,624 --> 00:14:54,127 CAN'T MAKE A GOOD SOUP, CAN'T DO A HANDSTAND IN A POOL, 417 00:14:54,161 --> 00:14:56,563 CAN'T SPELL THE WORD "LIEUTENANT." 418 00:14:56,596 --> 00:14:58,598 THERE'S A LOT OF "CAN'TS" IN MY LIFE RIGHT NOW. 419 00:14:58,631 --> 00:15:00,700 - LET'S MAKE IT HAPPEN, CAPTAIN. 420 00:15:00,733 --> 00:15:04,171 [Harris and Brett chatter indistinctly] 421 00:15:07,174 --> 00:15:09,642 - HELP, HELP, MY ARM LOOKS LIKE IT'S BLEEDING. 422 00:15:09,676 --> 00:15:10,610 - HOLY COW--LESLIE! 423 00:15:10,643 --> 00:15:12,179 - OH, BOY, OH, LOOK HOW MUCH IT'S BLEEDING. 424 00:15:12,212 --> 00:15:13,313 EVERYBODY LOOK AT IT. 425 00:15:13,346 --> 00:15:15,082 EVERYBODY LOOK OVER HERE. 426 00:15:15,115 --> 00:15:16,616 I NEED EVERYONE'S FULL ATTENTION DURING THIS-- 427 00:15:16,649 --> 00:15:17,617 - THERE'S A LOT OF BLOOD. 428 00:15:17,650 --> 00:15:18,618 - IT IS, IT'S SO-- 429 00:15:18,651 --> 00:15:20,320 - IT'S KETCHUP. 430 00:15:20,353 --> 00:15:22,522 - IS IT? 431 00:15:22,555 --> 00:15:23,523 - YES. 432 00:15:23,556 --> 00:15:25,258 - JERRY, JERRY. - IT'S KETCHUP. 433 00:15:33,033 --> 00:15:35,435 - DO YOU KNOW THEM? 434 00:15:35,468 --> 00:15:38,138 - WHAT DO YOU MEAN, THAT FAIRWAY FRANK IS NOT HERE? 435 00:15:38,171 --> 00:15:39,606 - HERE'S THE THING, EVELYN. 436 00:15:39,639 --> 00:15:41,474 WE'RE NOT SURE THAT THE POSSUM 437 00:15:41,508 --> 00:15:43,710 WE CAUGHT IS, IN FACT, FAIRWAY FRANK. 438 00:15:43,743 --> 00:15:46,746 - LESLIE, WHOEVER IT IS, IT'S A POSSUM. 439 00:15:46,779 --> 00:15:49,082 AND THE SOONER IT'S DEAD, THE SOONER THE MAYOR 440 00:15:49,116 --> 00:15:51,751 CAN DO WHAT HE WANTS WITH IT. 441 00:15:51,784 --> 00:15:54,654 - DOES HE WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH A DEAD POSSUM? 442 00:15:54,687 --> 00:15:56,223 - NO! - NO. 443 00:15:56,256 --> 00:15:57,590 - HE'S NOT A MONSTER. 444 00:15:57,624 --> 00:16:00,527 HE WANTS TO STUFF IT AND HANG IT ABOVE THE URINAL 445 00:16:00,560 --> 00:16:02,762 IN HIS OFFICE BATHROOM SO THAT LITTLE FLECKS OF PEE 446 00:16:02,795 --> 00:16:05,165 CAN GET ON IT FOREVER. 447 00:16:05,198 --> 00:16:06,366 - EWW. 448 00:16:06,399 --> 00:16:09,336 - NOW, LESLIE, YOU DID A GREAT JOB. 449 00:16:09,369 --> 00:16:12,539 AND THE MAYOR KNOWS THAT YOU DID A GREAT JOB. 450 00:16:12,572 --> 00:16:14,407 NOW WHERE IS THE POSSUM? 451 00:16:14,441 --> 00:16:18,278 - I'M SORRY BUT HE'S SOMEWHERE. YOU'LL NEVER FIND IT. 452 00:16:18,311 --> 00:16:20,547 AND HE'S GONNA STAY THERE UNTIL THE TRUTH COMES OUT. 453 00:16:20,580 --> 00:16:22,549 AND I WILL NOT REVEAL HIS LOCATION, 454 00:16:22,582 --> 00:16:24,051 NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU ASK ME. 455 00:16:24,084 --> 00:16:25,485 BUT I'M GONNA STOP TALKING NOW 'CAUSE I'M AFRAID 456 00:16:25,518 --> 00:16:26,686 I MAY ACCIDENTALLY SAY WHERE IT IS. 457 00:16:26,719 --> 00:16:28,721 SO PLEASE GO. 458 00:16:33,260 --> 00:16:34,427 - THIS IS INTERESTING. 459 00:16:34,461 --> 00:16:36,396 THEY PUT DOWN A RACCOON 460 00:16:36,429 --> 00:16:39,399 THAT BIT A JOGGER IN A PARK IN STATEN ISLAND. 461 00:16:39,432 --> 00:16:40,667 - WOW. 462 00:16:40,700 --> 00:16:42,269 - AND IN WALNUT CREEK, CALIFORNIA, 463 00:16:42,302 --> 00:16:44,504 THEY PUT DOWN A DUCK THAT BIT A KID. 464 00:16:44,537 --> 00:16:47,174 BUT SECURITY FOOTAGE LATER REVEALED 465 00:16:47,207 --> 00:16:50,177 THAT IT WAS ACTUALLY A GOOSE. 466 00:16:50,210 --> 00:16:52,479 - THAT'S GREAT. - NO, IT'S AWFUL, TOM. 467 00:16:52,512 --> 00:16:54,581 HOW WOULD YOU FEEL IF YOU KILLED AN INNOCENT DUCK 468 00:16:54,614 --> 00:16:57,084 AND LET A VICIOUS GOOSE WADDLE FREE? 469 00:16:57,117 --> 00:16:58,518 [phone ringing] 470 00:16:58,551 --> 00:17:00,287 - TOM HAVERFORD. - TOM, IT'S APRIL. 471 00:17:00,320 --> 00:17:02,322 I'M AT ANN'S HOUSE AND THE POSSUM'S LOOSE, OKAY? 472 00:17:02,355 --> 00:17:03,523 I NEED YOUR HELP. 473 00:17:03,556 --> 00:17:04,624 OH, MY GOD, IT'S CHEWING ON EVERYTHING! 474 00:17:04,657 --> 00:17:05,658 DON'T TELL LESLIE! 475 00:17:05,692 --> 00:17:08,195 - YOU GOT IT. 476 00:17:08,228 --> 00:17:10,063 POSSUM GOT LOOSE AT ANN'S HOUSE. 477 00:17:10,097 --> 00:17:11,431 - OH, MY GOD. 478 00:17:11,464 --> 00:17:13,700 APRIL! APRIL, IT'S LESLIE KNOPE 479 00:17:13,733 --> 00:17:14,767 FROM THE PARKS DEPARTMENT! 480 00:17:14,801 --> 00:17:16,569 - STOP RINGING THE DOORBELL. IT'S MAKING HIM MAD! 481 00:17:16,603 --> 00:17:18,238 [knocking] 482 00:17:18,271 --> 00:17:19,339 - OH! 483 00:17:19,372 --> 00:17:21,208 OH, MY GOD, HOW DID THIS HAPPEN? 484 00:17:21,241 --> 00:17:23,376 - I LET IT OUT OF ITS CAGE BECAUSE IT NEEDED WATER 485 00:17:23,410 --> 00:17:24,844 AND I THOUGHT IT WOULD JUST DRINK OUT OF THE TOILET 486 00:17:24,877 --> 00:17:26,213 OR SOMETHING, BUT THEN IT RAN OFF 487 00:17:26,246 --> 00:17:28,648 AND I COULDN'T GET IT BACK IN. 488 00:17:28,681 --> 00:17:30,583 HE DID THAT TOO. 489 00:17:30,617 --> 00:17:31,451 - OH...OH BOY. 490 00:17:31,484 --> 00:17:32,385 - YEAH, AND THEN I OPENED ALL THE DOORS 491 00:17:32,419 --> 00:17:34,421 'CAUSE I THOUGHT IT WOULD JUST GO OUTSIDE, 492 00:17:34,454 --> 00:17:35,722 BUT IT WON'T LEAVE THE HOUSE. 493 00:17:35,755 --> 00:17:37,457 IT MUST LOVE TACKY PICTURES OF FLOWERS. 494 00:17:37,490 --> 00:17:38,558 - OKAY, OKAY, OKAY, I'M GONNA FIX THIS. 495 00:17:38,591 --> 00:17:40,627 UM, LET ME JUST THINK FOR A SECOND. 496 00:17:40,660 --> 00:17:42,495 - UH-OH. - WHAT? 497 00:17:42,529 --> 00:17:43,496 - WHERE IS IT? I CAN'T SEE IT! 498 00:17:43,530 --> 00:17:44,697 - NO! OKAY, WHERE DID IT GO? 499 00:17:44,731 --> 00:17:46,499 - I DON'T KNOW! - UM, HERE'S WHAT WE DO. 500 00:17:46,533 --> 00:17:47,567 WE JUST GO OUTSIDE, ALL RIGHT? 501 00:17:47,600 --> 00:17:48,568 LET'S JUST GO OUTSIDE-- 502 00:17:48,601 --> 00:17:51,638 [screaming] - GET IN HERE! 503 00:17:55,608 --> 00:17:59,512 - [lengthy groan] 504 00:17:59,546 --> 00:18:00,647 [knock on door] 505 00:18:00,680 --> 00:18:03,683 I HAVEN'T EVEN STARTED YET. 506 00:18:03,716 --> 00:18:04,851 - I KNOW. 507 00:18:04,884 --> 00:18:07,687 I THOUGHT YOU COULD USE SOME HELP. 508 00:18:07,720 --> 00:18:09,456 THOSE CITY PLANNING GUYS CAN BE REAL PAINS IN THE ASS. 509 00:18:09,489 --> 00:18:11,558 YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN'? 510 00:18:11,591 --> 00:18:13,293 OKAY. 511 00:18:13,326 --> 00:18:14,627 - I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW 512 00:18:14,661 --> 00:18:16,629 THAT I STILL DON'T THINK CITY CODES-- 513 00:18:16,663 --> 00:18:19,666 - RON, SHUT UP, WOULD YOU PLEASE? 514 00:18:19,699 --> 00:18:22,369 I'M TAKING A HALF DAY OFF TO COME AND HELP YOU OUT 515 00:18:22,402 --> 00:18:23,870 BECAUSE YOU'RE MY FRIEND. 516 00:18:23,903 --> 00:18:26,839 SO JUST SHUT UP. 517 00:18:26,873 --> 00:18:30,777 - NO, I'M BRINGING MY WORKSHOP UP TO THE SWANSON CODE. 518 00:18:30,810 --> 00:18:33,880 AND IF THE SWANSON CODE HAPPENS TO OVERLAP 519 00:18:33,913 --> 00:18:36,616 WITH THE CITY GOVERNMENT CODE-- 520 00:18:36,649 --> 00:18:39,219 - SHUT UP! 521 00:18:39,252 --> 00:18:41,788 - I KNOW THERE'S A DOOR THERE, BUT I KIND OF FEEL LIKE 522 00:18:41,821 --> 00:18:43,356 IT'S GONNA CHEW THROUGH THE DOOR 523 00:18:43,390 --> 00:18:44,791 AND COME AND JUMP ON MY FACE AND BITE ME. 524 00:18:44,824 --> 00:18:46,693 - EWW, I KNOW. - WHAT IF IT'S IN HERE? 525 00:18:46,726 --> 00:18:47,594 - WHAT IF IT LAID EGGS IN THE BED? 526 00:18:47,627 --> 00:18:49,262 [both scream] 527 00:18:49,296 --> 00:18:50,297 - OKAY, THERE ARE NO EGGS. 528 00:18:50,330 --> 00:18:51,598 WE SHOULD HAVE KILLED IT, 529 00:18:51,631 --> 00:18:52,832 IT'S SO HUGE. I'M GONNA CALL ANDY. 530 00:18:52,865 --> 00:18:54,267 - NO. - YEAH. 531 00:18:54,301 --> 00:18:55,468 HE TACKLED IT ONCE BEFORE. 532 00:18:55,502 --> 00:18:56,469 HE CAN DO IT AGAIN. 533 00:18:56,503 --> 00:18:57,504 - NO, PLEASE DON'T, OKAY? 534 00:18:57,537 --> 00:18:58,571 HE'S GONNA BE PISSED AT ME. 535 00:18:58,605 --> 00:19:01,241 I ALREADY RUINED HIS BIG DAY, AND IT'S MY FAULT 536 00:19:01,274 --> 00:19:02,775 THAT IT'S IN ANN'S HOUSE, WHO HE'S OBVIOUSLY 537 00:19:02,809 --> 00:19:04,744 STILL IN LOVE WITH. 538 00:19:04,777 --> 00:19:05,612 I JUST-- 539 00:19:05,645 --> 00:19:10,917 I DON'T WANT HIM TO BE MAD AT ME, OKAY? 540 00:19:10,950 --> 00:19:14,921 - OH, APRIL. HE'LL FORGIVE YOU. 541 00:19:14,954 --> 00:19:16,456 - YOU THINK SO? 542 00:19:16,489 --> 00:19:18,358 - YEAH. I-- 543 00:19:18,391 --> 00:19:19,792 WE DON'T HAVE TO CALL ANDY. 544 00:19:19,826 --> 00:19:21,661 WE CAN JUST CALL ANIMAL CONTROL. 545 00:19:21,694 --> 00:19:24,564 - OKAY. 546 00:19:24,597 --> 00:19:27,634 - AND, APRIL, ANYTIME YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT BOYS-- 547 00:19:27,667 --> 00:19:30,703 - OH MY GOD, STOP. [both scream] 548 00:19:43,950 --> 00:19:47,520 [phone ringing] 549 00:19:49,656 --> 00:19:51,491 - YO. 550 00:19:51,524 --> 00:19:52,959 SO I FEEL LIKE YOU WERE MAD AT ME YESTERDAY, 551 00:19:52,992 --> 00:19:54,327 AND I DON'T KNOW WHY. 552 00:19:54,361 --> 00:19:56,496 SO I MADE A LIST OF EVERYTHING I DID 553 00:19:56,529 --> 00:19:58,698 AND I'M GONNA TRY NOT TO DO ANY OF THEM AGAIN. 554 00:19:58,731 --> 00:20:03,736 ALSO, I GOT YOU THIS COFFEE. 555 00:20:03,770 --> 00:20:05,505 AND THEN THERE'S THIS. 556 00:20:05,538 --> 00:20:06,806 FOURTH PARAGRAPH DOWN. 557 00:20:06,839 --> 00:20:08,808 "BUT DWYER HAD SOME HELP CATCHING THE POSSUM. 558 00:20:08,841 --> 00:20:10,843 "'I WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN ABLE TO DO IT WITHOUT AN EARLY MORNING 559 00:20:10,877 --> 00:20:13,280 "'CAFFEINE BOOST FROM THE AMAZING APRIL LUDGATE. 560 00:20:13,313 --> 00:20:15,315 "'SHE GAVE ME THE LIQUID COURAGE I NEEDED 561 00:20:15,348 --> 00:20:18,751 TO WRESTLE THAT BEAST TO THE GROUND.'" 562 00:20:18,785 --> 00:20:20,620 - WELL, MS. KNOPE, I HAVE TO SAY 563 00:20:20,653 --> 00:20:22,355 I'M VERY DISAPPOINTED. 564 00:20:22,389 --> 00:20:23,723 - YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO SAY THAT. 565 00:20:23,756 --> 00:20:24,591 YOU COULD HAVE JUST THOUGHT IT. 566 00:20:24,624 --> 00:20:27,760 - WHAT'D YOU DO WITH THE POSSUM EXACTLY? 567 00:20:27,794 --> 00:20:30,330 - WELL, I'M PROUD TO SAY THAT IT'S SOMEWHERE 568 00:20:30,363 --> 00:20:32,499 THE MAYOR CAN NEVER PEE ON IT. 569 00:20:32,532 --> 00:20:33,866 IT'S OKAY, HONESTLY. 570 00:20:33,900 --> 00:20:36,369 I MEAN, LOOK, WHEN I RETIRE, 571 00:20:36,403 --> 00:20:38,638 AND I'M ATTENDING SOME GALA 572 00:20:38,671 --> 00:20:41,741 HONORING THE FIRST THREE FEMALE PRESIDENTS IN HISTORY-- 573 00:20:41,774 --> 00:20:44,977 MYSELF, AND TWO OTHER WOMEN I'VE INSPIRED-- 574 00:20:45,011 --> 00:20:47,614 I WANNA BE LOOKING BACK AT MY DISTINGUISHED LEGACY, 575 00:20:47,647 --> 00:20:51,351 AND NOT THINKING THAT I OWE MY CAREER TO SOME POSSUM. 576 00:20:51,384 --> 00:20:54,387 AND I WANNA BE WEARING A HUGE, BEAUTIFUL BLUE HAT. 577 00:20:56,055 --> 00:20:57,757 - THANK YOU SO MUCH. - SURE. 578 00:20:57,790 --> 00:20:59,592 - IT MADE ME FEEL SO HAPPY THAT I KNEW SOMEBODY WAS HERE 579 00:20:59,626 --> 00:21:00,793 TAKING CARE OF MY HOUSE. 580 00:21:00,827 --> 00:21:01,794 - COOL. 581 00:21:01,828 --> 00:21:03,396 - SO DID THE NEIGHBORS GIVE YOU ANY PROBLEMS? 582 00:21:03,430 --> 00:21:04,564 - NO. - ANYTHING IN-- 583 00:21:04,597 --> 00:21:06,533 - POSSUM. THERE WAS A POSSUM. 584 00:21:06,566 --> 00:21:08,468 WE CAPTURED A POSSUM AND WE BROUGHT IT INTO YOUR HOUSE 585 00:21:08,501 --> 00:21:10,537 AND IT GOT OUT AND IT MIGHT HAVE LAID EGGS IN YOUR BED. 586 00:21:10,570 --> 00:21:11,538 - WHAT? 587 00:21:11,571 --> 00:21:13,306 - AND IT WENT INTO YOUR LAUNDRY AND YOUR KITCHEN 588 00:21:13,340 --> 00:21:14,974 AND IT TOUCHED ALL YOUR BRAS, AND I'M SO SORRY. 589 00:21:15,007 --> 00:21:16,643 IT'S OUR FAULT, WE CAPTURED IT, AND IT GOT OUT 590 00:21:16,676 --> 00:21:18,345 AND IT RAN AROUND AND IT WAS A POSSUM. 591 00:21:18,378 --> 00:21:19,646 OKAY, APRIL-- RUN! RUN, APRIL! 592 00:21:19,679 --> 00:21:21,414 SORRY, ANN! I LOVE YOU! 593 00:21:22,682 --> 00:21:24,551 - I'M GONNA GO. 594 00:21:24,584 --> 00:21:26,586 - I THINK THAT WOULD BE BEST.