1
00:00:06,518 --> 00:00:08,018
[Confetti blasts, Ben screams]
2
00:00:08,052 --> 00:00:09,720
God!
[Yelps]
3
00:00:09,754 --> 00:00:10,721
Sorry! Sorry!
4
00:00:10,755 --> 00:00:11,889
What's happening?
5
00:00:11,923 --> 00:00:13,057
I can't hear!
6
00:00:13,091 --> 00:00:14,658
And I'm dying!
7
00:00:14,692 --> 00:00:15,659
Baby, relax.
8
00:00:15,693 --> 00:00:16,827
I just wanted to surprise you.
9
00:00:16,861 --> 00:00:19,463
Open the bottom drawer
and read the cake.
10
00:00:21,699 --> 00:00:23,667
"Will you go to prom with me?"
11
00:00:23,701 --> 00:00:26,070
Well, this just keeps
getting weirder.
12
00:00:26,104 --> 00:00:27,704
Because of the merger,
13
00:00:27,739 --> 00:00:29,373
schools have had
to make some cuts,
14
00:00:29,407 --> 00:00:31,408
and the first thing to go
was the senior prom.
15
00:00:31,443 --> 00:00:33,744
So as a last-minute hail Mary,
16
00:00:33,778 --> 00:00:37,014
the parks department
is throwing prom for them.
17
00:00:37,048 --> 00:00:38,849
They also wanted
to cut A.P. Latin,
18
00:00:38,883 --> 00:00:40,584
so I volunteered to teach Latin.
19
00:00:40,618 --> 00:00:42,986
Which reminds me,
I need to learn Latin.
20
00:00:43,021 --> 00:00:45,155
I can't stop thinking
about that job in Chicago,
21
00:00:45,190 --> 00:00:47,424
and I think this prom
will be a good distraction.
22
00:00:47,459 --> 00:00:49,259
In my senior year
when I couldn't decide
23
00:00:49,294 --> 00:00:51,094
between Indiana and Amherst,
24
00:00:51,129 --> 00:00:53,097
I focused all my energy
on planning my prom,
25
00:00:53,131 --> 00:00:54,431
and it was the best prom ever.
26
00:00:54,466 --> 00:00:57,000
Plus, I made out with Harvey
from the A.V. Club.
27
00:00:57,035 --> 00:00:59,002
Hmm, I think
I'm jealous of Harvey.
28
00:00:59,037 --> 00:01:00,003
You shouldn't be.
29
00:01:00,038 --> 00:01:01,505
A few weeks later,
he almost died
30
00:01:01,539 --> 00:01:03,006
from a VCR electrocution.
31
00:01:03,041 --> 00:01:04,341
Legend has it
32
00:01:04,375 --> 00:01:06,009
that he can still
turn on a microwave
33
00:01:06,044 --> 00:01:07,244
just by blinking at it.
34
00:01:07,278 --> 00:01:08,245
The point is,
35
00:01:08,279 --> 00:01:10,047
will you go to the prom with me?
36
00:01:10,081 --> 00:01:11,882
Well, I thought
you'd never ask,
37
00:01:11,916 --> 00:01:13,450
because we're nearing 40.
38
00:01:13,485 --> 00:01:14,785
- [Chuckles]
- Course I will.
39
00:01:14,819 --> 00:01:17,121
Yay! Prom!
40
00:01:17,155 --> 00:01:20,124
[Triumphant music]
41
00:01:20,158 --> 00:01:28,165
Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
42
00:01:37,342 --> 00:01:40,310
Okay, we are making progress,
prom committee.
43
00:01:40,345 --> 00:01:42,579
Now, our budget
is basically zero,
44
00:01:42,614 --> 00:01:44,415
so we're gonna need
to cover all the jobs
45
00:01:44,449 --> 00:01:46,150
that we would normally
hire people for.
46
00:01:46,184 --> 00:01:48,152
Tom, you're in charge of music.
47
00:01:48,186 --> 00:01:50,654
Oh, man.
Well, all right.
48
00:01:50,688 --> 00:01:52,656
Aw, did you want to DJ,
little puppy?
49
00:01:52,690 --> 00:01:54,491
I didn't know
that little puppies
50
00:01:54,526 --> 00:01:57,161
could operate an iPod
with their little puppy paws.
51
00:01:57,195 --> 00:01:58,829
Eew and boo.
52
00:01:58,863 --> 00:02:00,664
This kind of thing is getting
out of hand with you two.
53
00:02:00,698 --> 00:02:02,466
Y'all are on official warning.
54
00:02:02,500 --> 00:02:04,635
I did DJ a little
back in the day.
55
00:02:04,669 --> 00:02:07,004
I had a show called
"Zoot Suit Wyatt"
56
00:02:07,038 --> 00:02:08,338
on Carleton College radio.
57
00:02:08,373 --> 00:02:09,840
Tuesdays from 3:00 to 5:00 A.M.,
58
00:02:09,874 --> 00:02:11,342
I was the king of swing.
59
00:02:11,376 --> 00:02:13,343
I thought
we as a culture agreed
60
00:02:13,378 --> 00:02:15,345
to forget the year
that everyone was into swing.
61
00:02:15,380 --> 00:02:17,247
Okay, Ben, you can co-DJ
with Tom.
62
00:02:17,282 --> 00:02:18,816
- [Whispers] Yes.
- What! No!
63
00:02:18,850 --> 00:02:20,484
If you eclipse my flavor
in any way,
64
00:02:20,518 --> 00:02:21,685
we'll have a problem.
65
00:02:21,720 --> 00:02:23,086
All right, Allison,
you are in charge
66
00:02:23,121 --> 00:02:24,288
of choosing the prom theme,
67
00:02:24,322 --> 00:02:26,523
and now it has to be perfect
and magical
68
00:02:26,558 --> 00:02:28,525
and look like a million bucks
but cost zero bucks.
69
00:02:28,560 --> 00:02:29,860
So what do you got?
70
00:02:29,894 --> 00:02:32,362
I was thinking the theme
could be "Fairy tale."
71
00:02:32,397 --> 00:02:34,437
The theater department
did Into the Woods last year,
72
00:02:34,466 --> 00:02:35,799
and we still have the scenery.
73
00:02:35,834 --> 00:02:37,801
I laid out
some preliminary plans
74
00:02:37,836 --> 00:02:38,836
in this binder.
75
00:02:38,870 --> 00:02:40,838
Wow!
76
00:02:40,872 --> 00:02:43,774
Are those jense-trodder
color tabs?
77
00:02:43,808 --> 00:02:45,042
I thought those
were discontinued.
78
00:02:45,076 --> 00:02:46,043
They were.
79
00:02:46,077 --> 00:02:47,111
I had to order them
80
00:02:47,145 --> 00:02:48,312
through some Mexican
back channels.
81
00:02:48,346 --> 00:02:50,180
Juan Julio Oficina Supplies?
82
00:02:50,215 --> 00:02:51,515
I thought
they went out of business.
83
00:02:51,549 --> 00:02:53,549
They did, but they opened up
a new one in Oaxaca.
84
00:02:53,551 --> 00:02:55,719
What is happening right now?
85
00:02:55,754 --> 00:02:57,554
Okay, everybody
get back to work.
86
00:02:57,589 --> 00:02:59,556
And, Allison,
come by my office later
87
00:02:59,591 --> 00:03:01,625
so we can keep crushing it.
88
00:03:01,659 --> 00:03:03,460
All right,
let's go over our set list.
89
00:03:03,495 --> 00:03:05,529
- Set list? No need.
- So, what,
90
00:03:05,563 --> 00:03:07,731
you're just gonna put your iPod
on shuffle?
91
00:03:07,766 --> 00:03:09,333
No, but I could.
You want to know why?
92
00:03:09,367 --> 00:03:10,667
[Sighs]
93
00:03:10,702 --> 00:03:12,836
Because every single song
you own is a banger?
94
00:03:12,871 --> 00:03:14,638
Every song I download
95
00:03:14,672 --> 00:03:16,473
has to pass a series
of rigorous tests
96
00:03:16,508 --> 00:03:19,143
to answer one simple question:
97
00:03:19,177 --> 00:03:20,477
Is it a banger?
98
00:03:20,512 --> 00:03:21,578
How many beats per minute?
99
00:03:21,613 --> 00:03:22,679
How many drops?
100
00:03:22,714 --> 00:03:24,314
How dope are the drops?
101
00:03:24,349 --> 00:03:26,050
Were any acoustic instruments
used?
102
00:03:26,084 --> 00:03:28,352
If so, it is not a banger.
103
00:03:28,386 --> 00:03:30,721
I once accidentally downloaded
a Lumineers song.
104
00:03:30,755 --> 00:03:32,689
I had to throw away
my whole computer
105
00:03:32,724 --> 00:03:33,924
just to be safe.
106
00:03:33,958 --> 00:03:35,559
I feel like, to me,
107
00:03:35,593 --> 00:03:37,761
set list flow is very important.
108
00:03:37,796 --> 00:03:39,897
I mean,
we're basically vibe curators.
109
00:03:39,931 --> 00:03:41,331
Ugh. Oh, no.
110
00:03:41,366 --> 00:03:43,500
I hope that high school
auditorium's big enough,
111
00:03:43,535 --> 00:03:46,503
'cause I'm bringing
10,000 maniacs.
112
00:03:46,538 --> 00:03:49,073
Sometimes it's really hard
to be friends with you.
113
00:03:49,107 --> 00:03:50,541
Thank God we don't have
to be seen together.
114
00:03:50,575 --> 00:03:52,343
Yes, we do.
We're co-DJs.
115
00:03:52,377 --> 00:03:53,410
Not anymore.
116
00:03:53,445 --> 00:03:55,712
You're working with...
117
00:03:55,747 --> 00:03:57,715
[In electronic voice]
DJ Robo Drop.
118
00:03:57,749 --> 00:04:00,117
♪ Ba-da-da, mm, mm, mm,
mm-mm ♪
119
00:04:00,151 --> 00:04:04,188
Oh, I hope that this prom
is exactly like my senior prom.
120
00:04:04,222 --> 00:04:06,356
Theme:
"My heart will go on."
121
00:04:06,391 --> 00:04:08,692
Photo booth
with Monica Lewinsky look-alike.
122
00:04:08,727 --> 00:04:10,561
After-party--
Megan Rickerson's house.
123
00:04:10,595 --> 00:04:12,896
Her parents used to let us drink
as much as we wanted.
124
00:04:12,931 --> 00:04:15,065
That's--that's
where we should have
125
00:04:15,100 --> 00:04:16,233
this after-party.
126
00:04:16,267 --> 00:04:17,234
Or, no, we can't,
127
00:04:17,268 --> 00:04:19,069
because they moved to prison.
128
00:04:19,104 --> 00:04:20,425
Prom is nothing
but a huge party
129
00:04:20,438 --> 00:04:21,905
full of smiling, dancing people
130
00:04:21,940 --> 00:04:23,340
enjoying themselves.
131
00:04:23,374 --> 00:04:25,342
It's literally
my worst nightmare.
132
00:04:25,377 --> 00:04:26,610
And I hate punch.
133
00:04:26,644 --> 00:04:28,445
April Ludgate,
134
00:04:28,480 --> 00:04:29,947
I'm gonna sing to you a song
135
00:04:29,981 --> 00:04:31,949
that I first wrote 15 years ago
136
00:04:31,983 --> 00:04:35,552
for my prom date, Sarah Weiss.
137
00:04:35,587 --> 00:04:37,554
♪ You're as hot as the sun ♪
138
00:04:37,589 --> 00:04:39,790
♪ but you're as cold as ice ♪
139
00:04:39,824 --> 00:04:43,293
♪ let me take you to paradise ♪
140
00:04:43,328 --> 00:04:45,462
♪ come on, roll the dice ♪
141
00:04:45,497 --> 00:04:47,798
♪ it will be twice as nice ♪
142
00:04:47,832 --> 00:04:53,637
♪ Sarah Wei--April Ludgate ♪
143
00:04:53,671 --> 00:04:57,474
♪ will you go to prom with me? ♪
144
00:04:57,509 --> 00:04:58,475
Boom!
145
00:04:58,510 --> 00:04:59,643
Will you?
146
00:04:59,677 --> 00:05:01,812
[Groans] Fine.
I'll go with you,
147
00:05:01,846 --> 00:05:03,514
because Leslie's making us,
148
00:05:03,548 --> 00:05:04,782
and we live together,
149
00:05:04,816 --> 00:05:06,450
and we only have one car
right now
150
00:05:06,484 --> 00:05:07,684
because you laked mine.
151
00:05:07,719 --> 00:05:09,019
What does "laked" mean?
152
00:05:09,053 --> 00:05:10,521
I tried to jump it over a lake.
153
00:05:10,555 --> 00:05:12,356
Why don't you stay out
of our conversations, Larry!
154
00:05:12,390 --> 00:05:14,625
Will do.
[Chuckles]
155
00:05:14,659 --> 00:05:15,793
So I want to show you
156
00:05:15,827 --> 00:05:17,461
some very cool
before and after pictures
157
00:05:17,495 --> 00:05:18,862
of Cherryhurst Park,
158
00:05:18,897 --> 00:05:21,498
one of our greatest
accomplishments.
159
00:05:21,533 --> 00:05:23,167
Why are you showing me
all this?
160
00:05:23,201 --> 00:05:24,501
Because I think
you have a real knack
161
00:05:24,536 --> 00:05:26,337
for public service.
We here at the parks department
162
00:05:26,371 --> 00:05:27,805
have something called
163
00:05:27,839 --> 00:05:30,307
"The April Ludgate
Summer Solstice Druid Festival
164
00:05:30,341 --> 00:05:32,209
and Buffalo Wings
Eating Contest."
165
00:05:32,243 --> 00:05:33,844
I don't know why
I let her name it.
166
00:05:33,878 --> 00:05:36,513
Basically, it's a summer
internship program.
167
00:05:36,548 --> 00:05:38,215
I think you'd be great.
168
00:05:38,249 --> 00:05:39,683
Do you want to work here?
169
00:05:39,718 --> 00:05:41,618
Definitely!
I'm totally interested.
170
00:05:41,653 --> 00:05:43,587
- Great.
- Allison Gliffert.
171
00:05:43,621 --> 00:05:44,922
Hi, Mr. Swanson.
172
00:05:44,956 --> 00:05:46,423
You two know each other?
173
00:05:46,458 --> 00:05:47,925
Is there some secret society
174
00:05:47,959 --> 00:05:49,693
for the greatest humans
on earth?
175
00:05:49,728 --> 00:05:51,996
Do you meet Tom Hanks
and Elena Kagan
176
00:05:52,030 --> 00:05:53,997
in the Statue
of Liberty's crown?
177
00:05:54,032 --> 00:05:57,167
God, this fake club
I'm inventing is amazing.
178
00:05:57,202 --> 00:05:58,869
Allison's father
owns the hardware store
179
00:05:58,903 --> 00:05:59,937
I've been going to
180
00:05:59,971 --> 00:06:01,972
since before Allison
was even born.
181
00:06:02,007 --> 00:06:04,274
What brings you to the festering
putrid stink hole
182
00:06:04,309 --> 00:06:06,410
on the armpit of freedom?
183
00:06:06,444 --> 00:06:07,544
That's what he calls city hall.
184
00:06:07,579 --> 00:06:09,513
Um, Leslie was just telling me
185
00:06:09,547 --> 00:06:10,714
about your summer internship,
186
00:06:10,749 --> 00:06:12,015
and I was thinking
about taking it.
187
00:06:12,050 --> 00:06:13,484
[Laughs] Oh, no, no, no, no.
188
00:06:13,518 --> 00:06:14,518
No.
189
00:06:14,552 --> 00:06:16,086
I respect your father too much
190
00:06:16,121 --> 00:06:18,088
to let his daughter
work for free
191
00:06:18,123 --> 00:06:19,323
for the government.
192
00:06:19,357 --> 00:06:21,392
Why don't you get a paying job
for the summer?
193
00:06:21,426 --> 00:06:23,494
Why don't you shut
your mustache?
194
00:06:23,528 --> 00:06:25,396
- Sorry.
- You know what?
195
00:06:25,430 --> 00:06:26,530
Tim Hautner,
196
00:06:26,565 --> 00:06:27,798
who owns the sawmill out
on Lowell Drive,
197
00:06:27,832 --> 00:06:29,166
is a personal friend.
198
00:06:29,200 --> 00:06:31,869
He's always looking
for bright young employees
199
00:06:31,903 --> 00:06:34,872
to give money to
in exchange for honest work.
200
00:06:34,906 --> 00:06:36,140
That would be awesome.
201
00:06:36,174 --> 00:06:37,574
I definitely need money
for school.
202
00:06:37,609 --> 00:06:38,609
Oh, really?
203
00:06:38,643 --> 00:06:39,777
Is it worth a few bucks
204
00:06:39,811 --> 00:06:41,245
to get a million splinters
in your fingers
205
00:06:41,279 --> 00:06:43,614
and then cut off your fingers
accidentally,
206
00:06:43,648 --> 00:06:45,949
'cause that will happen.
207
00:06:45,984 --> 00:06:49,586
I have tolerated Leslie's
pro-government ways
208
00:06:49,621 --> 00:06:52,256
because her annoying kindness
and generosity
209
00:06:52,290 --> 00:06:54,558
sneakily made me like her
as a person.
210
00:06:54,593 --> 00:06:57,628
But I draw the line
at corrupting America's youth.
211
00:06:57,662 --> 00:06:59,763
I'm sure I can get Allison a job
212
00:06:59,798 --> 00:07:01,432
at Tim Hautner's sawmill.
213
00:07:01,466 --> 00:07:03,767
I once did him a favor.
214
00:07:03,802 --> 00:07:05,869
I built his sawmill.
215
00:07:05,904 --> 00:07:07,371
I may be
leaving this office soon.
216
00:07:07,405 --> 00:07:09,907
I need to plant seeds
for the next generation.
217
00:07:09,941 --> 00:07:11,875
Interns become full-time staff,
218
00:07:11,910 --> 00:07:13,377
become department directors.
219
00:07:13,411 --> 00:07:15,045
Circle of life.
220
00:07:15,080 --> 00:07:16,313
The seasons turn.
221
00:07:16,347 --> 00:07:19,283
It's really quite beautiful.
222
00:07:19,317 --> 00:07:20,951
And if Ron tries to stop me,
223
00:07:20,985 --> 00:07:23,298
he can eat
a big ol' bowl of butts.
224
00:07:24,722 --> 00:07:26,698
Hee hee!
Hah hah yeah!
225
00:07:26,818 --> 00:07:28,418
Pawnee!
226
00:07:28,453 --> 00:07:30,287
Class of '99!
227
00:07:30,321 --> 00:07:31,922
Uh-huh!
228
00:07:33,191 --> 00:07:34,391
Ooh!
229
00:07:34,425 --> 00:07:37,789
[Gasps] Girl, you look creepy.
230
00:07:37,909 --> 00:07:39,130
Would you like a drink?
231
00:07:39,250 --> 00:07:40,632
- All this stuff is free.
- No, it's not.
232
00:07:40,756 --> 00:07:42,190
Why'd you pay for a limo?
233
00:07:42,224 --> 00:07:43,458
Because it's prom.
234
00:07:43,492 --> 00:07:44,759
If you don't show up in a limo,
235
00:07:44,793 --> 00:07:45,993
legally, they can't let you in.
236
00:07:46,028 --> 00:07:47,729
Does your mom want
to take pictures?
237
00:07:47,763 --> 00:07:49,464
Uh, yeah, she does.
238
00:07:49,498 --> 00:07:50,999
Hey, hey! Orin!
239
00:07:51,033 --> 00:07:52,300
Who's Orin?
240
00:07:52,334 --> 00:07:54,802
I'm April's mom.
241
00:07:54,837 --> 00:07:56,738
You two look adorable.
242
00:07:56,772 --> 00:07:59,707
Ugh, just take the picture
already, mom.
243
00:07:59,742 --> 00:08:02,076
My baby is all grown up.
244
00:08:02,111 --> 00:08:04,045
Have her home by 11:00.
245
00:08:04,079 --> 00:08:05,880
Mom, stop embarrassing me.
246
00:08:05,914 --> 00:08:08,383
Say good-bye to your father.
247
00:08:12,121 --> 00:08:13,254
Bye, dad.
248
00:08:13,288 --> 00:08:14,589
Good night, sir.
249
00:08:14,623 --> 00:08:16,383
This is all the stuff
we have to work with?
250
00:08:16,392 --> 00:08:17,825
Where's everything I requested?
251
00:08:17,860 --> 00:08:19,060
Where's my smoke machine?
252
00:08:19,094 --> 00:08:20,528
Where's my girls dressed
in Teddy Bear costumes?
253
00:08:20,562 --> 00:08:21,562
Where's my Yeezus Mountain?
254
00:08:21,597 --> 00:08:22,764
Yeah, tell me about it.
255
00:08:22,798 --> 00:08:24,866
I specifically requested
elliptical cartridges
256
00:08:24,900 --> 00:08:26,534
for the turntables.
257
00:08:26,568 --> 00:08:28,369
How am I supposed to keep
my Husker Du albums
258
00:08:28,404 --> 00:08:29,737
in near-mint condish?
259
00:08:29,772 --> 00:08:30,905
Hey, I have an idea.
260
00:08:30,940 --> 00:08:32,173
Why don't you throw them
in the garbage?
261
00:08:32,207 --> 00:08:34,642
My prom was right after
I got impeached,
262
00:08:34,677 --> 00:08:37,478
so I couldn't leave the house
without being egged.
263
00:08:37,513 --> 00:08:40,982
But my parents threw me a prom
in our living room.
264
00:08:41,016 --> 00:08:43,851
I think I'm still messed up
from it.
265
00:08:43,886 --> 00:08:45,987
I was actually only at my prom
for 15 minutes.
266
00:08:46,021 --> 00:08:47,822
By the time
I got my Armani suit pressed
267
00:08:47,856 --> 00:08:51,025
and got the little dimple
on my tie just right,
268
00:08:51,060 --> 00:08:52,460
it was 11:45 P.M.
269
00:08:52,494 --> 00:08:53,961
My date was pretty pissed,
270
00:08:53,996 --> 00:08:56,965
but, uh, I looked fly as hell.
271
00:08:56,999 --> 00:08:59,300
Leslie, thanks again.
272
00:08:59,335 --> 00:09:01,402
We just wouldn't have
had a prom without you.
273
00:09:01,437 --> 00:09:03,571
This is A-plus work.
274
00:09:03,605 --> 00:09:05,740
A-plus!
Thank you, Principal Russell.
275
00:09:05,774 --> 00:09:06,874
Can I get that in writing?
276
00:09:06,909 --> 00:09:08,142
Oh-ho, Leslie.
277
00:09:08,177 --> 00:09:10,411
You haven't changed
since high school.
278
00:09:10,446 --> 00:09:12,046
I can't believe
he gave you an A-plus.
279
00:09:12,081 --> 00:09:13,214
Oh, did he?
I didn't even notice.
280
00:09:13,248 --> 00:09:14,382
No bigs.
281
00:09:14,416 --> 00:09:16,056
Listen, Allison,
I have a question for you
282
00:09:16,085 --> 00:09:17,752
that's very important
and very serious.
283
00:09:17,786 --> 00:09:18,753
Listen to me closely.
284
00:09:18,787 --> 00:09:19,754
[Air hisses]
285
00:09:19,788 --> 00:09:20,922
[High-pitched voice]
Will you help me
286
00:09:20,956 --> 00:09:22,123
orchestrate the balloon drop?
287
00:09:22,157 --> 00:09:23,725
[Both laugh]
288
00:09:23,759 --> 00:09:25,193
[High-pitched voice]
Ms. Knope,
289
00:09:25,227 --> 00:09:26,594
it'd be my honor.
290
00:09:26,629 --> 00:09:28,596
Oh, hooray!
291
00:09:28,630 --> 00:09:30,264
- Allison.
- Oh.
292
00:09:30,299 --> 00:09:31,833
I was subcontracted
by the government
293
00:09:31,867 --> 00:09:33,167
to construct a lighting rig.
294
00:09:33,202 --> 00:09:34,269
Would like to help me
295
00:09:34,303 --> 00:09:36,437
screw some angle irons
onto some 2x4s?
296
00:09:36,472 --> 00:09:38,940
- I'll give you $40.
- Yeah, sure.
297
00:09:38,974 --> 00:09:40,808
[High-pitched voice] I'll just
be over here having fun.
298
00:09:40,843 --> 00:09:41,809
See you soon!
299
00:09:41,844 --> 00:09:43,144
I know what you're doing, Ron,
300
00:09:43,178 --> 00:09:44,379
and I will defeat you.
301
00:09:44,413 --> 00:09:45,613
Mark my words.
302
00:09:45,648 --> 00:09:47,115
Stop wasting helium.
303
00:09:47,149 --> 00:09:48,449
It is intended for welding
304
00:09:48,484 --> 00:09:49,684
and filling air ships.
305
00:09:49,718 --> 00:09:50,752
[Ffftttt]
306
00:09:50,786 --> 00:09:52,086
I attended prom
307
00:09:52,121 --> 00:09:53,488
with Susan Hofler.
308
00:09:53,522 --> 00:09:54,822
Picked her up in my truck,
309
00:09:54,857 --> 00:09:57,325
we slow-danced
to a Merle Haggard song,
310
00:09:57,359 --> 00:09:58,826
and then I left early
311
00:09:58,861 --> 00:10:00,695
to go to my shift at the quarry.
312
00:10:00,729 --> 00:10:03,364
I was 12 years old.
313
00:10:03,399 --> 00:10:05,366
Never went again.
314
00:10:05,401 --> 00:10:08,303
Felt like I had outgrown it.
315
00:10:08,337 --> 00:10:10,471
[Mellow dance music]
316
00:10:10,506 --> 00:10:12,707
Well, we did it.
We went to prom.
317
00:10:12,741 --> 00:10:13,942
Yay!
Let's go now.
318
00:10:13,976 --> 00:10:15,109
No! What?
Are you kidding?
319
00:10:15,144 --> 00:10:16,377
This is awesome.
320
00:10:16,412 --> 00:10:17,645
Look around.
321
00:10:17,680 --> 00:10:18,780
The bloom of youth.
322
00:10:18,814 --> 00:10:21,049
Like flowers on the sunset
323
00:10:21,083 --> 00:10:23,451
of an eagle's poetry.
324
00:10:23,485 --> 00:10:26,321
- Andy, I hate teenagers.
- If you give this a chance,
325
00:10:26,355 --> 00:10:28,156
you're gonna love it,
I promise.
326
00:10:28,190 --> 00:10:29,657
It's like the movie
Expendables 2.
327
00:10:29,692 --> 00:10:30,992
First time, hated it.
328
00:10:31,026 --> 00:10:32,994
Second time, hated it.
329
00:10:33,028 --> 00:10:35,496
Third time, it was okay.
330
00:10:35,531 --> 00:10:37,365
But then the fourth, fifth,
sixth, seventh, tenth time
331
00:10:37,399 --> 00:10:38,866
I watched it,
332
00:10:38,901 --> 00:10:40,535
I realized something.
333
00:10:40,569 --> 00:10:42,036
It's just--it's not good.
334
00:10:42,071 --> 00:10:43,304
It's not a good movie.
335
00:10:43,339 --> 00:10:45,506
Now that I've convinced you,
336
00:10:45,541 --> 00:10:47,008
why don't we go dance?
337
00:10:47,042 --> 00:10:49,344
Um, I'm gonna go
to the girls' bathroom
338
00:10:49,378 --> 00:10:51,012
to check the trash cans
for babies,
339
00:10:51,046 --> 00:10:52,680
but you can dance if you want.
340
00:10:52,715 --> 00:10:54,382
Really? I love you!
Thank you!
341
00:10:54,416 --> 00:10:55,850
♪ Money's the motivation ♪
342
00:10:55,884 --> 00:10:57,519
♪ money's the conversation ♪
343
00:10:57,553 --> 00:10:58,553
♪ you on vacation ♪
344
00:10:58,587 --> 00:10:59,821
♪ we gettin' paid so ♪
345
00:10:59,855 --> 00:11:02,557
Uh, hey,
no one's really feeling this.
346
00:11:02,591 --> 00:11:04,726
All right,
not a 2 Chainz crowd.
347
00:11:04,760 --> 00:11:07,328
I'll throw on some yeezy
in a second.
348
00:11:07,363 --> 00:11:08,897
Jeezy?
349
00:11:08,931 --> 00:11:09,998
Weezy?
350
00:11:10,032 --> 00:11:12,166
Oh!
351
00:11:12,201 --> 00:11:14,002
You want some
of that classic stuff.
352
00:11:14,036 --> 00:11:15,903
All right, I'll break you off
some of that Ja Rule.
353
00:11:15,938 --> 00:11:18,006
Who's Ja Rule?
354
00:11:18,040 --> 00:11:19,274
What?
355
00:11:19,308 --> 00:11:20,608
How do you--
wha--
356
00:11:20,643 --> 00:11:21,909
who's what?
357
00:11:21,944 --> 00:11:23,344
The stuff you're playing
is so old,
358
00:11:23,379 --> 00:11:25,513
it's probably trinking
on grizzledump.
359
00:11:25,547 --> 00:11:26,881
Hey, what's grizzledump?
360
00:11:26,916 --> 00:11:28,616
And why is trinking on it bad?
361
00:11:28,651 --> 00:11:30,218
Oh, my God.
362
00:11:30,252 --> 00:11:32,053
I don't know
what's cool anymore.
363
00:11:32,087 --> 00:11:33,888
What's grizzledump, Ben?
364
00:11:33,922 --> 00:11:35,757
What's grizzledump?
365
00:11:35,791 --> 00:11:38,292
♪ This moment, we own it ♪
366
00:11:38,327 --> 00:11:41,429
So have you ever pulled
a ceremonial cord before?
367
00:11:41,463 --> 00:11:42,623
There's a little trick to it.
368
00:11:42,631 --> 00:11:44,065
You want to hold it--
not too tight,
369
00:11:44,099 --> 00:11:45,733
sort of like a firm handshake--
370
00:11:45,768 --> 00:11:48,236
and then move
towards the ground
371
00:11:48,270 --> 00:11:49,804
in a rope-pulling motion.
372
00:11:49,838 --> 00:11:52,073
So just pull the rope?
373
00:11:52,107 --> 00:11:53,074
That's right.
374
00:11:53,108 --> 00:11:54,909
Thanks, Leslie, for this,
375
00:11:54,944 --> 00:11:57,178
and for making prom happen
in the first place.
376
00:11:57,212 --> 00:11:58,452
Oh, you don't have to thank me.
377
00:11:58,480 --> 00:12:00,415
Working for the government
is its own reward--
378
00:12:00,449 --> 00:12:01,549
Run, Allison, run.
379
00:12:01,583 --> 00:12:03,217
You're wasting your time,
Leslie.
380
00:12:03,252 --> 00:12:05,220
Allison and I already
had a good talk
381
00:12:05,254 --> 00:12:07,388
about the power
of the hard-earned dollar.
382
00:12:07,423 --> 00:12:09,991
Don't listen to him.
Now, when you pull the rope,
383
00:12:10,025 --> 00:12:11,326
don't look at the balloons.
384
00:12:11,360 --> 00:12:13,328
Look at the faces of the people
385
00:12:13,362 --> 00:12:14,796
as the balloons drop.
386
00:12:14,830 --> 00:12:16,264
That's what government is about.
387
00:12:16,298 --> 00:12:17,432
Look at the faces.
388
00:12:17,466 --> 00:12:18,933
No, look at the cage
389
00:12:18,968 --> 00:12:20,935
that is holding
all of those balloons.
390
00:12:20,970 --> 00:12:23,605
I assembled that cage
and was paid for my labor,
391
00:12:23,639 --> 00:12:24,939
and I will use the money
392
00:12:24,974 --> 00:12:26,741
to buy shelter, fuel,
and medicine.
393
00:12:26,775 --> 00:12:27,742
Watch the cage.
394
00:12:27,776 --> 00:12:29,444
Pull the rope.
Watch the faces.
395
00:12:29,478 --> 00:12:31,613
- Watch the cage.
- Watch the faces!
396
00:12:31,647 --> 00:12:33,014
Uh, erm...
397
00:12:34,049 --> 00:12:36,017
[People cheering]
398
00:12:36,051 --> 00:12:38,319
Congratulations, Ron.
You've ruined prom.
399
00:12:38,354 --> 00:12:40,021
Everybody's having
a terrible time.
400
00:12:40,055 --> 00:12:43,124
[People cheering]
401
00:12:43,158 --> 00:12:44,959
I didn't go to my prom.
402
00:12:44,994 --> 00:12:47,262
I was dating an older fella
back then.
403
00:12:47,296 --> 00:12:48,930
Like I'm gonna dance
with a bunch of kids
404
00:12:48,964 --> 00:12:50,598
while he's coaching Duke
to the final four.
405
00:12:50,633 --> 00:12:53,334
I just want to go home,
but I feel bad
406
00:12:53,369 --> 00:12:55,003
because Andy's having
such a good time.
407
00:12:55,037 --> 00:12:57,939
[Upbeat hip-hop music]
408
00:12:57,973 --> 00:12:59,607
Whoa!
[Laughs]
409
00:12:59,642 --> 00:13:02,677
How can I love someone
when I hate everything he loves?
410
00:13:02,711 --> 00:13:03,711
That's not true.
411
00:13:03,746 --> 00:13:05,213
He loves a lot of dumb stuff,
412
00:13:05,247 --> 00:13:06,681
but he loves you the most.
413
00:13:06,715 --> 00:13:08,516
If something's bothering you,
just tell him.
414
00:13:08,550 --> 00:13:10,351
It's always better
to be direct.
415
00:13:10,386 --> 00:13:12,320
Hey, girl.
Are you ready to go?
416
00:13:12,354 --> 00:13:13,888
I feel like I told you
to wait in the car.
417
00:13:13,922 --> 00:13:16,557
Yeah.
418
00:13:16,592 --> 00:13:17,959
See?
419
00:13:17,993 --> 00:13:19,460
Be direct.
420
00:13:21,096 --> 00:13:23,564
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
421
00:13:23,599 --> 00:13:24,599
[Grunts] Ugh!
422
00:13:24,633 --> 00:13:25,900
You're finished, Knope.
423
00:13:25,935 --> 00:13:28,236
I just spoke with Tim Hautner
from the sawmill
424
00:13:28,270 --> 00:13:29,904
on my mobile telephone,
425
00:13:29,939 --> 00:13:32,073
and he's offering Allison
a paying job.
426
00:13:32,107 --> 00:13:34,008
She'll be assistant
to the head mulcher.
427
00:13:34,043 --> 00:13:35,176
Beat that.
428
00:13:35,210 --> 00:13:36,844
First of all,
your telephone is ridiculous.
429
00:13:36,879 --> 00:13:38,513
And second of all,
I already beat it.
430
00:13:38,547 --> 00:13:39,948
She's gonna take
that internship.
431
00:13:39,982 --> 00:13:41,783
She pulled the rope.
There's no turning back!
432
00:13:41,817 --> 00:13:44,118
Leslie.
Mr. Swanson.
433
00:13:44,153 --> 00:13:46,721
May I see both of you
in my office?
434
00:13:46,755 --> 00:13:48,256
Now.
435
00:13:49,725 --> 00:13:51,559
It has come to my attention
436
00:13:51,594 --> 00:13:54,495
that both of you have been
harassing Allison
437
00:13:54,530 --> 00:13:56,331
about her summer employment
decisions.
438
00:13:56,365 --> 00:13:57,999
I wouldn't say "harassing"
439
00:13:58,033 --> 00:14:00,435
so much as
persistently tormenting.
440
00:14:00,469 --> 00:14:02,503
I am disappointed in you,
Leslie.
441
00:14:02,538 --> 00:14:04,772
No!
Don't be disappointed in me.
442
00:14:04,807 --> 00:14:06,407
I've never had a principal
or a teacher
443
00:14:06,442 --> 00:14:07,742
be disappointed in me.
444
00:14:07,776 --> 00:14:09,410
I'm not sure that I'm equipped
to handle it.
445
00:14:09,445 --> 00:14:11,365
Whatever's going on
between you two and Allison
446
00:14:11,380 --> 00:14:13,014
ends right now.
447
00:14:13,048 --> 00:14:15,450
This is supposed
to be a fun event for the kids.
448
00:14:15,484 --> 00:14:16,784
You're absolutely right,
449
00:14:16,819 --> 00:14:19,053
and I will bow out immediately.
450
00:14:19,088 --> 00:14:20,221
Thank you.
451
00:14:20,256 --> 00:14:21,723
I think the only thing
that matters
452
00:14:21,757 --> 00:14:23,558
is whatever A-pluses
453
00:14:23,592 --> 00:14:25,393
may or may not
have been handed out,
454
00:14:25,427 --> 00:14:27,562
you know, are still in effect
455
00:14:27,596 --> 00:14:28,696
in perpetuity.
456
00:14:28,731 --> 00:14:30,531
I have your word, then.
457
00:14:30,566 --> 00:14:31,799
This ends now?
458
00:14:31,834 --> 00:14:34,269
Absolutely.
459
00:14:34,303 --> 00:14:35,870
Attention, everyone.
460
00:14:35,904 --> 00:14:38,206
Now it is time
for the most magical moment
461
00:14:38,240 --> 00:14:40,708
of any high school prom:
462
00:14:40,743 --> 00:14:42,377
The announcement of the winner
463
00:14:42,411 --> 00:14:45,446
of the Parks and Recreation's
coveted summer internship.
464
00:14:45,481 --> 00:14:47,749
[Light applause]
465
00:14:47,783 --> 00:14:48,917
Without further ado,
466
00:14:48,951 --> 00:14:50,585
help me congratulate
467
00:14:50,619 --> 00:14:52,420
Allison Gliffert!
468
00:14:52,454 --> 00:14:53,621
[Light applause]
469
00:14:53,656 --> 00:14:55,456
Can we get a little music here
maybe?
470
00:14:55,491 --> 00:14:57,592
Probably just ruin the moment
with something lame.
471
00:14:57,626 --> 00:14:58,927
Leslie, I told you.
472
00:14:58,961 --> 00:15:00,261
I don't know what
I'm doing this summer.
473
00:15:00,296 --> 00:15:01,776
That's okay.
I know what you're doing.
474
00:15:01,797 --> 00:15:03,064
You're gonna take
this internship.
475
00:15:03,098 --> 00:15:04,699
You're gonna fall in love
with public service.
476
00:15:04,733 --> 00:15:06,067
You're gonna rise
through the ranks.
477
00:15:06,101 --> 00:15:07,569
You'll take over Ron's job
as parks director.
478
00:15:07,603 --> 00:15:09,070
You'll win a seat in congress,
479
00:15:09,104 --> 00:15:10,972
and then you and I will run
against each other as president,
480
00:15:11,006 --> 00:15:12,446
but right before
we find out who won,
481
00:15:12,474 --> 00:15:13,908
I'm gonna pat you on the back
and say,
482
00:15:13,943 --> 00:15:16,244
"It's your turn, kid."
483
00:15:16,278 --> 00:15:17,486
Sorry, children.
484
00:15:17,606 --> 00:15:19,037
Forget this happened.
485
00:15:19,157 --> 00:15:22,483
Continue with your awkward
close-quarters gyrating.
486
00:15:22,518 --> 00:15:24,485
And if this is the evening
487
00:15:24,520 --> 00:15:27,194
you decide to have sex,
use protection, please!
488
00:15:29,761 --> 00:15:31,401
Dude, if you're not gonna
play anything,
489
00:15:31,426 --> 00:15:32,392
I'm stepping in.
490
00:15:32,427 --> 00:15:33,894
Go ahead.
Play whatever you want.
491
00:15:33,928 --> 00:15:34,928
Can't be any worse than this.
492
00:15:34,963 --> 00:15:37,931
[Upbeat alternative rock music]
493
00:15:37,966 --> 00:15:42,436
♪ ♪
494
00:15:42,470 --> 00:15:43,704
Hey, I love this song!
495
00:15:43,738 --> 00:15:44,972
You actually like this?
496
00:15:45,006 --> 00:15:46,874
Yeah, dude, it's classic rock.
497
00:15:46,908 --> 00:15:48,609
Well, there's more
where that came from,
498
00:15:48,643 --> 00:15:50,744
snoopies!
499
00:15:50,778 --> 00:15:51,745
Sorry.
500
00:15:51,779 --> 00:15:53,080
Tried to use slang.
501
00:15:53,114 --> 00:15:54,248
That just came out.
502
00:15:54,282 --> 00:15:56,083
I only listen to CDs.
503
00:15:56,117 --> 00:15:58,418
It's the way music like this
was meant to be heard.
504
00:15:58,453 --> 00:16:01,255
But it's not even auto-tuned.
505
00:16:02,323 --> 00:16:04,091
Where'd you get that dress?
506
00:16:04,125 --> 00:16:05,759
I was buried in it.
507
00:16:07,262 --> 00:16:09,229
Babe, huge news.
508
00:16:09,264 --> 00:16:12,933
I just got us invited
to Damian Keating's barn party.
509
00:16:14,636 --> 00:16:15,936
He's captain of the soccer team,
510
00:16:15,970 --> 00:16:17,271
and he has a fake I.D.,
511
00:16:17,305 --> 00:16:20,174
so I think he can
get us all free beer.
512
00:16:20,208 --> 00:16:22,276
What's wrong?
513
00:16:22,310 --> 00:16:24,411
There's cupcakes and music.
514
00:16:24,446 --> 00:16:25,979
Why aren't you having fun?
515
00:16:26,014 --> 00:16:29,149
Because this prom
reminds me that...
516
00:16:29,184 --> 00:16:31,451
you had, like, a million friends
in high school
517
00:16:31,486 --> 00:16:33,587
and everyone thought
you were awesome,
518
00:16:33,621 --> 00:16:36,423
and I spent four years
making fun of everyone
519
00:16:36,458 --> 00:16:39,426
and hiding mops so the janitor
would think he was going insane.
520
00:16:39,461 --> 00:16:40,828
If we went
to high school together,
521
00:16:40,862 --> 00:16:41,995
we would have
never started dating,
522
00:16:42,030 --> 00:16:44,164
which means that...
523
00:16:44,199 --> 00:16:45,666
we would have
never gotten married,
524
00:16:45,700 --> 00:16:47,868
and I don't like thinking
about that.
525
00:16:47,902 --> 00:16:49,703
Hey, maybe we wouldn't
have gotten together
526
00:16:49,737 --> 00:16:51,371
if we were in high school.
527
00:16:51,406 --> 00:16:55,008
But that's because kids
in high school are idiots.
528
00:16:55,043 --> 00:16:56,343
The only thing that matters is
529
00:16:56,377 --> 00:16:58,779
that we found each other
right now,
530
00:16:58,813 --> 00:17:00,481
and it's the best.
531
00:17:02,250 --> 00:17:03,550
You know what?
532
00:17:03,585 --> 00:17:04,718
Let's bail.
533
00:17:04,753 --> 00:17:06,653
We got that limo
for three more hours.
534
00:17:06,688 --> 00:17:08,088
I think the extra length
535
00:17:08,123 --> 00:17:09,957
could help us get us
over that lake.
536
00:17:09,991 --> 00:17:12,159
No. Let's stay.
537
00:17:12,193 --> 00:17:13,460
I'll have fun.
538
00:17:13,495 --> 00:17:14,695
I promise.
539
00:17:14,729 --> 00:17:16,530
[Muffled music in background]
540
00:17:16,564 --> 00:17:18,032
I have never told you this,
541
00:17:18,066 --> 00:17:20,534
but I actually have
a ten-point scale
542
00:17:20,568 --> 00:17:22,770
for how insane you are being.
543
00:17:22,804 --> 00:17:25,005
I observe your behavior,
544
00:17:25,039 --> 00:17:26,874
and if it's a five or below,
I say nothing.
545
00:17:26,908 --> 00:17:28,709
Smart.
Saves a lot of time.
546
00:17:28,743 --> 00:17:30,711
If it reaches a six,
547
00:17:30,745 --> 00:17:32,379
like for example the incident
548
00:17:32,414 --> 00:17:34,948
with the girls' soccer uniforms
back in '05...
549
00:17:34,983 --> 00:17:37,451
They wrote all the team names
in pink.
550
00:17:37,485 --> 00:17:39,286
Nobody told them to do that.
551
00:17:39,320 --> 00:17:41,522
I try to steer you back
to safety.
552
00:17:41,556 --> 00:17:43,524
A seven is when I lock you
in your office
553
00:17:43,558 --> 00:17:45,125
until you cool down.
554
00:17:45,160 --> 00:17:47,895
This Allison Gliffert thing
may have hit an eight.
555
00:17:47,929 --> 00:17:50,564
I have the police on standby.
556
00:17:50,598 --> 00:17:52,399
It's your move.
557
00:17:53,668 --> 00:17:55,836
I'm thinking of leaving Pawnee,
558
00:17:55,870 --> 00:17:58,238
moving to Chicago.
559
00:17:58,273 --> 00:17:59,740
I just need to make sure
560
00:17:59,774 --> 00:18:03,076
that the future is secure
around here when I leave.
561
00:18:03,111 --> 00:18:04,244
You know?
562
00:18:04,279 --> 00:18:05,746
Allison would become April,
563
00:18:05,780 --> 00:18:07,748
and then April would become me.
564
00:18:07,782 --> 00:18:08,916
I mean, let's face it, Ron.
565
00:18:08,950 --> 00:18:10,017
I love you,
566
00:18:10,051 --> 00:18:11,785
but you're hopeless without me.
567
00:18:11,820 --> 00:18:14,788
Blueprints for the future
568
00:18:14,823 --> 00:18:16,190
are a fool's errand.
569
00:18:16,224 --> 00:18:18,358
They're like blueprints
for a house.
570
00:18:18,393 --> 00:18:19,693
Nice to have,
571
00:18:19,727 --> 00:18:21,028
but any foreman
with half a brain
572
00:18:21,062 --> 00:18:22,463
doesn't need to look at them.
573
00:18:22,497 --> 00:18:25,966
One day,
this year or maybe the next,
574
00:18:26,000 --> 00:18:28,635
you're gonna be somewhere else.
575
00:18:28,670 --> 00:18:31,271
So enjoy yourself now.
576
00:18:31,306 --> 00:18:33,607
Damn it.
577
00:18:33,641 --> 00:18:35,776
I just wish once
578
00:18:35,810 --> 00:18:38,479
you would say something stupid
so I could ignore it.
579
00:18:40,315 --> 00:18:43,417
Attention, please.
The votes are in.
580
00:18:43,451 --> 00:18:46,520
And your Pawnee high prom
king and queen
581
00:18:46,554 --> 00:18:50,157
are...Lucy Taylor
582
00:18:50,191 --> 00:18:51,658
and Andy Dwyer!
583
00:18:51,693 --> 00:18:52,993
What?
584
00:18:53,028 --> 00:18:54,828
I broke the box,
and I threw away all the votes,
585
00:18:54,863 --> 00:18:56,597
and I voted for you
a thousand times.
586
00:18:56,631 --> 00:18:58,499
You should get on up there,
King Dwyer.
587
00:18:58,533 --> 00:19:00,000
[Cheers and applause]
588
00:19:00,034 --> 00:19:01,235
Not without my queen.
589
00:19:01,269 --> 00:19:04,772
[Cheers and applause]
590
00:19:04,806 --> 00:19:06,173
Hi, Pawnee High.
591
00:19:06,207 --> 00:19:07,641
As your prom king,
592
00:19:07,675 --> 00:19:09,143
I'm your ruler.
593
00:19:09,177 --> 00:19:10,310
[Laughter]
594
00:19:10,345 --> 00:19:11,578
Silence!
595
00:19:11,613 --> 00:19:14,348
My first decree of power
596
00:19:14,382 --> 00:19:17,818
is to declare
that the prom queen
597
00:19:17,852 --> 00:19:19,820
shall be my wife,
April Ludgate,
598
00:19:19,854 --> 00:19:21,688
who is the best thing
that's ever happened to me
599
00:19:21,723 --> 00:19:23,857
who came to prom
even though she hates it.
600
00:19:23,892 --> 00:19:24,858
Give me this.
601
00:19:24,893 --> 00:19:26,126
Always next year.
602
00:19:26,161 --> 00:19:27,961
No, there isn't.
I'm a senior.
603
00:19:27,996 --> 00:19:29,830
This is your wife?
How old are you?
604
00:19:29,864 --> 00:19:32,132
He's 33, and I'm 47/immortal.
605
00:19:32,167 --> 00:19:33,133
Get out.
606
00:19:33,168 --> 00:19:35,335
High school forever!
607
00:19:35,370 --> 00:19:37,838
[Cheers and applause]
608
00:19:37,872 --> 00:19:39,206
Yeah, you're having fun now.
609
00:19:39,240 --> 00:19:41,208
I rigged an election
and got kicked out of prom.
610
00:19:41,242 --> 00:19:42,676
I can get on board with that.
611
00:19:44,101 --> 00:19:45,735
[Lively rock music]
612
00:19:45,769 --> 00:19:48,004
♪ I look just like
buddy holly ♪
613
00:19:48,038 --> 00:19:49,405
♪ oh, oh, oh ♪
614
00:19:49,439 --> 00:19:52,455
♪ and you're Mary Tyler Moore ♪
615
00:19:52,837 --> 00:19:54,008
My life is over.
616
00:19:54,126 --> 00:19:56,260
I'm officially old and uncool.
617
00:19:56,295 --> 00:19:58,329
Might as well start wearing
a plaid shirt
618
00:19:58,363 --> 00:19:59,931
and a tie and khakis
619
00:19:59,965 --> 00:20:01,165
and whatever shoes
you're wearing.
620
00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:02,633
Look, the fact
that you don't know
621
00:20:02,668 --> 00:20:05,470
what high schoolers are into
doesn't make you uncool.
622
00:20:05,504 --> 00:20:07,305
It makes you
a normal human adult.
623
00:20:07,339 --> 00:20:09,874
You haven't had time to keep up
'cause the last few years,
624
00:20:09,908 --> 00:20:11,375
you started two different
businesses.
625
00:20:11,410 --> 00:20:12,777
I guess that's true.
626
00:20:12,811 --> 00:20:15,279
Richard Branson and Mark Cuban
are too busy making deals
627
00:20:15,314 --> 00:20:16,948
to keep up
with what the kids are into.
628
00:20:16,982 --> 00:20:19,050
How else do you explain
their terrible haircuts?
629
00:20:19,084 --> 00:20:20,718
And, hey, you may be old,
630
00:20:20,752 --> 00:20:22,386
but you'll never be as old
as me.
631
00:20:22,421 --> 00:20:25,389
Yeah.
You're old as [bleep].
632
00:20:25,424 --> 00:20:26,491
Thanks, Ben.
633
00:20:26,525 --> 00:20:28,125
Glad I could help.
634
00:20:28,160 --> 00:20:29,827
[Cheers and applause,
light hip-hop]
635
00:20:29,862 --> 00:20:31,996
♪ The show goes on all night ♪
636
00:20:32,030 --> 00:20:34,332
Allison, we wanted to apologize
637
00:20:34,366 --> 00:20:35,900
for acting so bananas.
638
00:20:35,934 --> 00:20:38,169
You just have so much promise,
we got excited.
639
00:20:38,203 --> 00:20:40,071
You're a good kid.
And whatever you choose,
640
00:20:40,105 --> 00:20:41,706
you'll be great at it.
641
00:20:41,740 --> 00:20:43,708
I have to say
I admire you both.
642
00:20:43,742 --> 00:20:45,076
You were right, Leslie.
643
00:20:45,110 --> 00:20:47,311
Watching all those happy faces,
it felt amazing.
644
00:20:47,346 --> 00:20:48,746
But it was really nice
645
00:20:48,780 --> 00:20:50,648
to build something
and get paid for it.
646
00:20:50,682 --> 00:20:52,483
Ugh, Ron, she is so thoughtful
and grounded.
647
00:20:52,518 --> 00:20:54,352
Get her away from me,
or I'm gonna kidnap her
648
00:20:54,386 --> 00:20:55,887
and try to mentor her to death.
649
00:20:55,921 --> 00:20:59,590
Oh, let me introduce you
to my boyfriend.
650
00:20:59,625 --> 00:21:01,325
Greg Pikitis.
651
00:21:01,360 --> 00:21:02,827
What up, Knope?
652
00:21:02,861 --> 00:21:04,829
Hello, Gregory.
653
00:21:04,863 --> 00:21:06,164
You guys know each other?
654
00:21:06,198 --> 00:21:07,765
You might say that.
655
00:21:07,800 --> 00:21:10,501
Come on, baby.
Let's get out of here.
656
00:21:10,536 --> 00:21:11,836
That's that horrible kid
657
00:21:11,870 --> 00:21:14,338
who used to prank us
all the time, right?
658
00:21:14,373 --> 00:21:15,673
Offer is off the table.
659
00:21:15,707 --> 00:21:17,608
She's a terrible person
with terrible judgment.
660
00:21:17,643 --> 00:21:20,511
[Dishes clatter]
661
00:21:21,780 --> 00:21:22,914
[Click click click]
662
00:21:22,948 --> 00:21:24,348
[Screeches] Pikitis!
663
00:21:24,598 --> 00:21:30,592
Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com