- Previously on "The Real Housewives
of New York City"...
- And play ball! - Here we go!
- Let me see your finger. - I was talking to--
- Oh, my goodness.
- Maybe I have a little crush.
[laughter]
- Bottoms up, Jenna.
- [yells] - Damn.
- I cannot wait to get back.
- These two came at me.
- Which ones? - Erin and ----ing Sai.
- Your story is about your parents coming from Kenya.
- Is that not part of my story?
- No, we want to know about you!
- I'm gonna (BLEEP) with her.
Thank you so much.
Do not tell her I have her phone.
- I am so pissed.
You knew Erin had my phone
and didn't want to give it to me?
- Stop saying my name when I'm not around.
- I didn't say your name.
- I heard you say, "Erin, Erin."
- Yeah, so what? - Get out of my face.
- I did not say your name. - Get--
- Take these glasses when you're talking to me...
- Excuse me? - First of all.
- Do not grab me. - You took my phone.
- You are not allowed to yell-- - You had my ----ing phone.
- Ubah, I'm not kidding. Get away from me right now.
- Try! Why did you take my phone?
- Get away from me. - Why did you have my phone?
- I'm not talking about it
when you're talking at me like this,
like, screaming at me. You wanna calm down?
- I am very calm. I am very calm.
- You're not gonna scream in my face.
- You're not gonna be wearing your ----ing glasses
and not looking at me. - First of all,
give me my glasses. - I am not.
- Guys, I want to have a good time today.
- How long have you had my phone?
- Come on, I know that you're upset
- 45 minutes. - I'll hold your glasses...
- Go ahead. - For 45 minutes.
- This is immature.
- No, no, no, no, no... - Let's just talk about it...
- In a nice manner. - No, no, no.
- All right, I'm over this. Let's go have some fun.
- That's not OK to scream in someone's face like that.
- It's not. - It's not.
- Like, it's not OK. - OK, I know. I know.
- Like, thank you for ruining my last day.
You don't scream in my face. I'm not a child.
- You're right. - I'm sorry.
- It was very rude. - Take a minute. Take a minute.
- I mean, this girl is my friend.
This is the first conflict I've ever had with her,
and it's the worst conflict I've ever had in my life.
Like, I have no idea what's going on with her,
and I didn't even know she had this side.
That's exactly what my kids do.
They yell at each other, and they grab things,
and they say, "Give me that," and "Give it back."
Now I need some rum. - Who's ready for a rum tour?
- * Yeah, MC with it *
- These colors are amazing.
- Rum makes people happy. Caribbeans love rum.
They all have their special rum punch,
so let's have a little fun.
This is a rum punch type dress.
- This is so ----ing cute.
- I don't even have sunglasses. - No, it's not a stick.
- Oh, I'm gonna go get your sunglasses.
- Fun fact, statistically, when people
are upset and driving, they're more likely
to get in an... - (BLEEP).
- No. - Come on, sweetie.
- Absolutely not. - Come on.
- She--no. 45 minutes. - Come on.
- OK, Siri, can you set an alarm for 45 minutes?
- Seriously? - Jenna, get in your car.
- I think it's like high school.
Like, what are we doing? [chuckles]
It just feels really petty to me.
[exhales sharply]
- Here's a point where I think it goes wrong sometimes, Ubah,
is 'cause you actually are right,
and you have a valid point,
but because when you yell, you then lose.
- But when you are real... - I know.
- You cannot fake. - I know.
- I travel quite a bit for my work
and for fun and pleasure,
and the deal that my family and I have made:
every morning, I have to check in,
and every night, I have to check in
that I'm safe, that I'm OK.
It's not easy to be a single girl in the world,
and I'm so sick and tired of people
not thinking of single girls.
- Got nowhere with that.
- So should I go get other sunglasses?
- I mean, the idea that she's gonna set a timer
and give them back to you. - She's such a bitch.
- Whoo! [laughter]
- I'm thinking things are good between her and I.
- Yeah. - She's stealing my phone.
- Yeah.
- In the middle of the night in ----ing Anguilla,
I have not texted my family to say good night.
I was like, "Why?" - Right.
- Like, a truly innocent prank.
- If somebody took my phone, I would be
a little bit annoyed. - I wanted her to be annoyed.
She threw me in the pool. That was the whole point.
- If she loved me, she would never...
- Make me worry about my phone.
And she's like, "Oh, I was going to
not give you your phone all day."
- I know, but, Ubah, then-- but it's always--
you always hit so low.
Like, immediately, then you come...
- Uh-uh, uh-uh. - In my face,
and you're like... - Take that back.
- "She ----ing verbally abused you for--
- Take that back. It's true.
How many times did you guys fight and make up,
fight and make up? She's calling you slut.
You're flirting with her husband.
You're doing all these things.
And then in one minute, she's hugging you
and kissing you.
- You're more offended by someone
not going to one dinner reservation.
- Maybe I like her a little bit more.
- What did I do in comparison to everyone else?
- She didn't go up to Abe and say,
"Hey, when you get divorced, please let me know,
at my anniversary party."
You know I love you, but I don't believe
your story about the embryo thing.
- There's a lot of stuff I could lie about,
and that's not one of them.
- She's ----ing abusing you like a ping-pong with her.
- Will you just be care--
let's not talk about this right now.
- No, I'm OK. I'm OK.
- Just-- let's just enjoy the ride.
- Why are they driving so slow?
I feel like we're driving to a ----ing funeral.
- [laughs]. We are.
[thunder rumbles]
[quirky music]
- Oh, I'm so bummed it's raining.
- And now I'm all wet.
- I hope this doesn't last.
- Look, it doesn't look like it is.
We're driving towards, like, open sky.
- You guys are so gangster.
I would not come in the car with me.
- Shut the (BLEEP) up.
- I would be like, "We're going with a driver, Ubah.
You are on your own." - [laughs]
- The one story I did not completely understand
last night was the one where Brynn said
that she mistook and it ended up--
her tampon then jammed-- - The tampon?
- I was like, wait, really?
- I grabbed a tampon.
I, like, go down there, and I find the hole,
and I--shoo! And it's in. I'm like, "OK."
And I get up, and I'm like, "This feels weird," you know?
Like, I put the tampon in my butt.
- I mean, maybe.
- She put it up her butt like a little suppository?
- I mean, I guess if you're 11 or 12.
- Yeah, but I would think
that that would be insanely painful.
- Yeah, maybe she didn't put the whole thing in her butt.
Maybe she only put half of it in her butt.
- You can't have half of it. - Yeah.
Well, when I first put on a tampon,
I literally only put the first part.
The rest of it was hanging out. - Oh, my God, me too.
And I left the cardboard applicator.
I didn't know that... - Yeah, yeah.
- It was supposed to come out.
I was like, "This..." - It's very challenging.
- "Does not feel good." - It's confusing.
- Is this where we're going?
- By the way, you bitches better give me a good rating.
[laughter] - Oh, my God.
[upbeat pop music]
- Oh, my God.
[chuckles]
- OK, come on, guys. - This thing doesn't get out.
- Doesn't wanna-- - I cannot get it out.
- (BLEEP), we're stuck. - We're gonna go this way.
- I know--we can't get out of our seatbelts.
- I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. You're on your own.
- Here, I got out of mine. - There we go, babe.
- Thank you so much. - Got it?
- Thank you so much.
- Hi. - Here, Erin.
Why don't you let us sandwich you?
- The best beach bar in the Caribbean.
- Oh, my God. - What's going on, my friend?
- So wet. - Hi.
- We're excited. - I'm Brynn. I'm wet.
[laughs] - Nice to meet you. I'm Elvis.
- Hi, pleasure meeting you, Sorry, I'm very wet.
- Hi, nice to meet you. Elvis. - Elvis!
- Elvis, always. - Oh, you're Elvis.
- This is my place.
Can I get you all something to drink?
We have the world-famous rum punch,
number one in the Caribbean?
- Give us what you suggest, my man.
Make it strong. - Do you have sparkling water?
- Can I just try your best rum?
- Wait, what's in here?
- That's bay leaf, cinnamon sticks,
and hardwood. It's a local rum.
- I'll try it. - I make myself.
- Oh, my God. - It's the best thing ever.
- Really? - Yes.
- Let's see what you're working with, Elvis.
- He makes that. - Yeah, I make it myself.
- Mama what? - Mama Juana.
- Wow. - Mama Juana.
- What's this, moonshine? - You got it.
- What is moonshine?
- Really? - Yes.
[harsh buzzer] It's amazing.
- It's so good.
- My friend, you can put-- [hiccups]
- That's delicious. - [laughs]
- Yeah. Do I blend in with the table?
- Oh, I don't know, poor Jessel.
Why-- why is she so forgettable?
I don't know. Did she do it to herself?
- He literally went from her to her.
I'm like, "Hi." Thank you.
- Do you make T-shirts?
- I have T-shirts, yes.
- Do you make long-sleeve T-shirts?
- Long-sleeve T-shirts. - I would like to buy one.
- No problem. - Can I bartend?
I want to bartend.
- Come on. I'm gonna bartend.
- Yes, girl. Yes. Yes, yes, yes.
- What am I gonna make everyone?
- OK. * I'm behind the bar *
I'm the new bartender! [all cheering]
Let's get wrecked!
[all cheering] - No, no, I'm kidding.
OK, OK. Sorry, sorry.
I don't want to bankrupt Elvis here.
I'm sorry.
I'm trying to play hot bartender
and relive my 20's. - Yeah, Sai!
[cheers]
- She's pretty good.
- I bartended for 10 years in the city,
and it was, like, the time of my life.
- Wow! - OK.
- Don't tell me any of your problems.
What I care about is, like, what do you want?
If your money is not out,
and the minute you go, "Uh..."
when I asked you if you were ready,
you're skipped. Skipped, moving on.
I thought I gave you one, Jessel.
Damn, Jessel.
- Are you ----ing serious?
- Jessel, I thought I gave it to you.
- [chuckles] Story of her life.
- What is happening? - Cheers.
- Elvis, to you and this wonderful establishment.
* *
- [trills] - What is this?
- You never had a Fireball?
It tastes like cinnamon gum. - You're my man.
- I am. - When I retire, I'll be back.
- You guys, do you want to see my old job?
[humming melody]
I just get on the bar and start dancing.
- Nice one, man. - Good job, Sai.
- [gasps] Oh my God, I'm obsessed.
Thank you so much.
[phone chirping] It's so cute.
Oh, my God, there's the alarm.
You know what that means? - What?
- That's the return of the sunglasses alarm.
[phone chirping]
- It needs to touch someone else's hand
before it comes to me.
Oh, thanks so much, Jenna. You found my sunglasses?
- 45 minutes.
[tense upbeat music]
- Instead of getting so mad,
talk to me like a normal friend.
- Don't tell me what to do.
* *
[tense upbeat music]
* *
- Don't tell me what to do.
I'm not your kid. I want to sit down on my own--
- Wait, so I'm-- am I your kid?
You just grabbed the sunglasses off my face.
- Guys, let's not do it here. - May I remind you,
you guys are actually really close friends.
You're both hurt. You both ----ed up.
You guys are friends. - And I don't--
I have got her back.
- By calling me a spoiled brat.
- You are. It's the truth. You are.
And you are abuse this girl. - When have I abused--
- A social climber?
- That whole situation with the restaurant
and how that felt... - Yes, yes, yes.
- Very, to me like ladder climbing.
- You don't have to climb when you're already at the top.
- You're gonna get... - I'm not.
- Pulled into this? - I'm good.
- This was before with the cheese
and the other thing with the whole--
the Casa Cipriani,
and I called you a social climber.
You know that. - I didn't know that.
- I told you this. - Oh, no.
But it's OK, though, 'cause I'm not gonna get upset
'cause I'm not.
Maybe Erin thinks there's a ladder
because she doesn't know how to get to the top.
I didn't have to climb. I took the elevator.
[laughs] Straight to the top.
I didn't even have to ask.
- And then two seconds,
hi, Brynn. I really love you.
- I'm going back to the villa. Bye.
* *
I just am blown away we're still--
we're still talking about this.
Like, so inappropriate.
And it's, like, someone's place of business.
I don't think it's appropriate to,
like, scream at the tops at other people.
That's not cool. I'm sorry.
- Should we, like-- is there another beach bar
we can walk down to? - Sure.
- Look, you cannot lash out at people and call them names.
I'm trying to play referee here,
but Ubah is someone that you just don't mess with.
Once you make Ubah hot,
there's really no turning her off.
- The only want--
reason I want to go back there
is because I would like a drink.
Can you come with me to the other side of the bar?
- Sure. - But here's the thing.
I'm trying to control myself.
I literally put myself on a control cruise.
- Cruise control, babe. - Whatever the (BLEEP) it is.
She come like fireball.
- Speaking of Fireball, bottoms up.
* *
- Elvis, we've reconvened in a new spot.
I think I want your Mama-- - Mama Juana?
- Just a sparkling water, please.
- Sparkling water. - Thank you.
- Start talking to me wear sunglasses.
No, I'm gonna see your ----ing eyes.
- Like, she can't even calm down.
- But I should've done that. - You got the glasses.
The sunglasses are probably worth more than the phone.
- Please, she's wearing ----ing sunglasses from Canal.
- I don't know what sunglasses she was wearing.
They were plastic.
I only took it because she have sensitive eyes.
- Canal Street sunglasses. - Damn.
- That's a low blow. - That's low.
That's right here.
- It--I mean, the fact that they're still standing there--
- Don't give it too much energy.
If someone, like, yelled at me,
standing over me and ripping my sunglasses off my head,
I would be upset, and I can see Erin's visibly upset,
and, Ubah, she's relentless. She won't let up.
So, yeah, I'm team Erin in this moment.
Like, I want her to be OK.
- Thank you, Elvis. - All the best.
- You're amazing. - Thank you.
Thank you very much.
- OK, are they getting ready to leave?
- Where? - Let's do one.
I wanna do limbo. - Oh, can I do it?
- Limbo! Limbo! - Oh, here we go.
They're gonna do the limbo.
- Brynn, Brynn, Brynn!
[upbeat music]
- Go, go!
[all cheering]
* *
- That was so close, Brynn.
- I really have no respect for any of them anymore.
I can't believe no one except for Jenna
has come over to see how I'm doing.
They're just, like, going along with the fun.
- Go, go, go!
[cheering] - Quick, come on!
No! - Yeah!
- Whoo!
- Wow.
She didn't get very far.
- Let's go, Ubah!
[cheering]
- I hope she falls.
[cheering]
- She broke the whole thing.
Or we can do something else. - Yeah, I'll play.
It's a great game. - OK.
[cheering]
- That was amazing! - Oh, no, you didn't.
You gave up.
[quirky music]
- This is tricky. - [laughs]
* *
[chanting together] Jeff! Jeff! Jeff! Jeff!
- Come on, Jeff!
- Yeah, Jeff. - Oh!
- Jeff!
- I just won. - Good job, ladies.
- You killed it. - We try, we try.
- Love it, love it. - So good.
- Thank you, guys. - You bet.
- Bye, Elvis. Thank you so much.
Cheers.
- Have a good one, guys.
This was great, though. I loved it.
- Did you hear that one of the girls
asked me if Brynn was my daughter?
- No.
- This woman, she asked me if Brynn was my daughter.
- Oh, my God, how funny. - I was like, "She's old--
I'm older than her, but not that old."
And she was like, "I'm drunk." I'm like, "OK, cool."
- I don't know how to do stuck. Drive.
Neutral. - And you're neutral.
- But where is the driver?
- You have to push down, I think, on the brake.
- Yeah, I am in brake.
- I can't believe Brynn fell during the limbo.
- We all fell, even me, even my short--
- That makes more sense.
I just figured she would have had a lot of experience
of bending over backwards. - [laughs]
- Not yet. Oh, we got to reverse out.
- Oh, sh--. - OK, OK.
[chuckles] Hang on.
No, no, no, no, don't do that.
* *
- I think you have to-- - Ooh, ah.
I can't get out.
- Yeah, that's it, that's it. - Go, go, go.
[upbeat music]
- Left side right? - Right here.
- Yeah, left side, left side. Not that.
Left side.
* *
- Let's go. Let's go. I'm hungry.
- Park over here, boo-boo. - OK, now it's hot.
I'm gonna change.
- Hi, welcome to Roy's.
- The party just has arrived.
- Thank you. - How are you?
- I'm good. This way, please.
- I love your scarf. - Thank you.
- I'm going to the bathroom.
- Where shall I sit?
Should I sit across from you, pretty lady?
- Please, please.
- Can I get you ladies anything to drink?
- What is your, like-- - Traditional rum punch.
- I would like a bottle of tequila just right here.
- No, she-- - She doesn't drink.
- You know what?
I'm gonna go for your finest rum punch.
- I'll take one too.
- I would love if you have hot water with lemons.
- OK, no problem.
- I wish that we can all just resolve this in some way.
- We can resolve this when people stop
being liars and abusive.
- OK, you're abusive, and she lied.
- Aggressive, but not abusive.
- Do we know when Jenna is getting here?
- No. - No, I have no idea.
- But I would like to know because I don't want her
to hear me say anything, but she was like,
"The truth is I'm not flying down
with you guys because I don't fly coach."
- Ew. - OK.
- She didn't. - Yeah, that's a good--
that's the thing.
- She told me that I told you guys
my uncle's super rich and this, duh, duh, duh.
- Your life was so incredibly hard
when you lived with your rich uncle?
- I said, I live with my uncle.
Did I say he was incredibly rich?
- Oh, my gosh. - Did I?
What the heck is wrong with you?
I never said any of that sh--.
Now that everything's coming to the surface,
I'm starting to realize, like, who's driving all this stuff,
you know?
Enough is enough. - Guys, come on.
It's our last night. I just want to have fun.
- I'm not taking one thing back.
[tense upbeat music]
* *
[hip-hop music]
- Guys, come on. It's our last night.
I just want to have fun.
- I'm not taking one thing back.
- There's absolutely nothing for us to, like,
continuously talk about the same conversation.
- Yeah. - So let's just order food.
I ordered a rum punch,
and then I would like to move on.
- Now, this is-- this is like a vacation
in a drink right here. Beautiful.
- OK, what can I get you ladies?
- Can I please have sparkling water with no ice?
- Can I have a sparkling water, too, please,
and can I also have a sauvignon blanc?
- I'll be right back.
I'm going to go to the bathroom.
Please don't fight.
[dramatic music]
- But here's the thing, you American people,
it seems like even if someone put a (BLEEP) in your ass,
you're like, "Please remove it.
It's OK. I don't want to troub--"
Why are you putting (BLEEP) in my ass?
What did I do to you?
- She's still going, going, going.
And I need to get off the roller coaster.
(BLEEP) you, Ubah.
OK, I hope you all have a wonderful lunch.
I'm going back. It's fine.
I got a car. It's all good.
- What happened? You didn't--
- It's fine. I'm not doing this.
I hope you guys have a great lunch, really.
I'll see you at home, OK? - Bye.
- What?
- I don't want to--
I can't be-- I literally cannot be near her.
The things that she's said about me--
she will not stop talking about me.
Just the only thing I ask you
is just please stop talking about me with her.
It's fine. I need a minute.
- I'm sorry. All right.
- Whatever. - Listen, I totally get it.
- Yeah.
- Ubah, she's incredibly sweet,
until she's not.
The first hint I saw of Ubah's switch getting flipped
was when she came over to my house
and she thought that I had duped her
into coming to my house and not telling her
the fact that there were gonna be cameras
and not telling her to be hair and makeup ready.
Hi, babe. Mm.
- So your assistant text me,
but she didn't say it's gonna be filmed.
- I'm so sorry. - It's fine.
I just don't want to be caught surprised.
- Of course not. No, no, no, no.
- If someone is inviting me somewhere,
you need to tell me if there's a camera.
- Totally. I can-- - That's it.
- I was like, "Ooh, OK, hi."
- No, you don't. - Just break down,
- Stop it. - No, you don't.
You're not malicious. Stop it.
- What did your meditation, positive Ubah go?
- I was gonna say, what happened to--
- Stop it. Like, stop.
This negative sh-- is not--
- She's hungry. We gotta get Ubah food.
- It's not worth it.
- There's one thing that I do.
I don't, like-- I don't come at you.
I don't yell at you.
So automatic, they think you have that Black thing,
Black get angry woman. - I don't know if it's that.
- I am so done... - Maybe.
- With this narrative, Black women are angry.
We are passionate, and we don't take your sh--,
and we're not fake.
- But it doesn't give anyone the right
to be in someone's face. - Guess what.
She was on my face...
- I don't even... - Telling me--
- I don't want to hear about this conversation anymore.
- If you don't want to hear the conversation,
don't jump in, because you jumping in
makes me want to correct you too.
- OK, OK, cool.
Ubah's right, when Black women get upset,
people take it upon themselves to think
that it's this angry Black woman mentality
when you're just showing emotion
just like every other woman.
However, I just don't think it plays out
into this situation. I get it.
Let's not have this conversation.
- That's it, yeah. - Cool.
- So don't jump in.
- We're not gonna talk about it.
- Fine. - Cool.
We have done all the yelling that we can possibly do.
Let's put it to rest, and let's move on.
- I took a dinghy. [laughter]
- (BLEEP). - Find a local fisherman.
Hey, guy. Are you busy today?
- Jessel, that was so funny.
- You guys, I'm funny.
- I don't expect it sometimes.
You are a little bit of a space cadet,
but it's like a good one.
- I'll take whatever I can get with you people.
- But you're so gentle and sweet.
- You are a very sweet person.
- I'm the most loyal person.
You tell me something, I'm never gonna ----ing
throw you under the bus.
- That was crazy.
- Hi, princess. - Hi.
[upbeat music]
- Is that hers? - Yes, it is.
- She left. Can I have it?
- Sure. - Thank you.
And then can we order from you, please?
- What can I get you ladies?
- Can I have the mahi salad, please?
- Do you have malt vinegar? - We do.
- I really want fish and chips. OK, thank you.
- I'm in. I grew up with that.
I love it.
- Do you have anything peaceful on the menu?
[laughter]
- How about those Yankees? - [laughs]
- Hey! Oh, wait.
Why did I grab my boobs?
- You can't help yourself. You do it if someone says hi.
You go, "Hi!"
- I'm gonna use the restroom, OK?
- Mimi taught me you attract more whatever with honey.
- With honey, than lemon.
- I learned this at the age of five
when all of everybody that was bigger than me
and smarter than me and lawyers and judges and--
I learned that if I just did Brynn,
I got to the safe place.
- You learned very early on that being--
getting attention, being flirt--
it gave you power. It's a great armor.
- I was raised by, like, a retired Betty Draper.
When I was pre-medicine, Mimi was like, "Honey,
"you don't go to college to become a doctor.
You go to marry a doctor."
- That's what your grandmother said to you?
- 100%.
I got a cadaver from IU, ----ing jumped up
on the table in a skirt.
I dissected it like a ----ing cannibal.
Nobody was proud of me. - Then go back to school.
- The second that I said I was dating a Turkish billionaire,
they were all proud of me.
My entire life I grew up, I wanted to be a doctor.
I was pre-med up until the second semester
of junior year, failed organic chem,
had a breakdown, and then took up PR.
I've done everything-- started the business,
exceeded, corporate ladder-- not social ladder, corporate.
I did all of it.
I get paid really well to do, like,
10 hours of work per week.
I honed in on the exact thing
that I'm really, really good at.
Now I'm seen as an expert.
My clients that I've worked for in the past,
now they come to me as a consultant.
- Wait, so how was it being raised by your grandma?
- Mimi? She was amazing.
She wasn't perfect,
but she did her best, and her best was good.
- So how old were you when you lived with her?
- Started two.
- So she was, like, your everything.
I'm sorry.
- No, but she's the best.
- I'm sorry. - I'm sorry.
- That's really intense.
- Mimi is a massive influence
not just on who I am today but everything.
She always encouraged me to travel,
to live somewhere else.
We'd watch movies together.
She'd say, "Oh, you should go there."
You should move there.
She wanted the world for me.
She did not want me to stay in Indiana.
- The only thing I ever think about is life is for living.
- Life is for living, but that's what Mimi liked.
Mimi liked jazziness.
[hums melody]
She lived in this la-la-la world,
and then I do too. - Can I say something?
She would have been so proud of you.
You know?
- We love you, Brynn.
I'm sorry.
You got new family.
- Yay! One's missing.
[laughter]
* *
- Hi, Abs. - Hi.
- Can you talk? - Yeah, I can talk.
[somber music]
- I know. [speaks Hebrew]
But I'm trying not to.
- Oh, don't cry. Don't cry.
- You know how I love Ubah? - OK.
- We go to dinner, and she left her phone in the car.
So I take the phone, and I'm like,
"You know what, I'm gonna prank her."
Within two minutes, she had her phone.
The next morning, she went crazy.
The way she treated me today was, like, I never in my life
was treated like that.
- She stood up over me and snatched my sunglasses
out of my face and said,
"You're not gonna get your sunglasses back."
- No, I walked away.
- And if she comes and talks to me, then what?
- Yeah.
- I know.
I feel like I'm back in seventh grade,
and seventh grade was a really hard year for me.
I was bullied for having a long jaw.
This boy used to call me Long Jaw Silver.
And it felt like that.
It was like-- she was so ----ing mean.
- Love you, Abba. - Enjoy.
- Thank you. I'll call you later.
- All right, bye.
- Coming up...
- I have a ----ing checklist
that I've been keeping in my ----ing phone...
- No sh--. - About this bitch, OK?
- No sh--. - Oh!
- ----ing bullet point list. - Oh, no, (BLEEP)!
[groovy music]
- [hums briefly]
Ladies and gentlemen, Pebbles.
[humming melody]
That would be my name if I were a stripper.
- Pebbles? - Yeah.
- You want some rice and peas too?
- Look at this plate.
- Yeah, I was waiting for you.
- You little boarding school brat.
- She really was.
- Would you send your future kids to boarding school?
- Of course. - You would?
- Yeah. - I don't think I would.
- Boarding school is not the way to go.
Parents who take boarding school their kids,
they do not want to be parents. End of story.
- I also think if you put them in a place
where everyone around them is privileged,
that's all they know. - That's all they know.
- I mean-- - What have you done with B?
- Well, one of the biggest issues
is I did not put him in a private school in the city.
- Really?
- Well, just because in the city,
these kids have private planes.
They all are, like, traveling to Greece
for the holidays. - Yeah.
- It's, like, the money is insane.
And it's so not real life. - Right.
- But, like, listen. I am not perfect at it.
Even my son has said to me, like,
"I have a warped sense of money."
So, like, don't-- I'm not sitting here
saying that I'm good at it. Like, I'm not--
- Good for you for admitting that.
- I'm trying not to spoil Beckett.
It's so hard.
I mean, I'm the one who's always, like--
needs to be reined in, literally,
even to the point where I'm like,
"Do you want to get ice cream?" He's like, "No, Mom."
And I'm like, "Do you want this shirt?"
And he's like, "No, Mom, it's too expensive."
I was like, "Right, right, right.
"Yeah, you're right.
You know, you're right. I--"
- Have people at your kid's school or anything--
and feel free to just tell me to stop--
have they ever like asked you if you're Jenna Lyons?
- When it was at its height, it was--
I could not go outside.
I grew up feeling so unattractive
and so not cool, so for someone to say,
"Can I take a picture with you," is like--
like, how many pictures do you want?
- Did you love it? Yeah.
- We live in a culture where the way that you look
is compared, despair, it's everything.
And women try to fit into it all the time,
and there is a lot of pressure.
The way that I'm approaching it now,
I feel much more in my body,
and I'm still myself.
I just realize that I'm not trying
to be something for someone else,
and I spent a lot of time doing that.
- I want to apologize for being the cause
of the deal with Erin,
'cause I know I love her, and I'm sure she loves me,
even though she hates me right now. I hate her too.
- I'm here. I'm on your team.
I'm your friend.
You're actually probably-- 97% of the time,
you're right, but listen to me,
and don't get angry at me. - I'm not. I'm not. I'm not.
- I'm on your team. You got to deliver a message.
The way that you send it,
you lose when you send it that way,
and that's all I'm saying. - But I'm telling you who I am.
I'm gonna be 80 years old taking people's sunglasses.
[laughter]
- You know what, we got the check--
we got to get the check. - Guys, let's roll.
- Get the check. - Yes, let's roll.
- Your Uber-- Ubah Uber is ready.
- Ubah rating ten out of ten.
- All right, let's bounce this.
Team Ubah, let's go.
[upbeat music]
* *
Oh! - Whee!
- [trills] - Ah!
- Hi!
- Are you gonna go get some rest when we get back?
- I don't know.
I actually slept, so I'm not as tired,
although I do feel like--
- I think I'm gonna just chill in a Jacuzzi maybe.
* *
- Here's something
that's interesting, too, is Erin...
That you're, like, just the dumb-dumb
of the whole group.
- But who is she to ----ing make that judgment?
- I don't get ----ing angry. I'm ----ing pissed.
Listen, I've been playing nice in the sand pit.
There have been things that have been building up
that I have literally said nothing about.
I let it ----ing go.
Now it's too much.
Now that what you told me that she's ----ing painting me out
to be this ----ing person--
- Hell ---ing no.
- That you've been lying about the whole time,
and you're trying to make-- equate our stories.
- I have a ----ing checklist
that I've been keeping in my ----ing phone...
- No sh--. - About this bitch, OK?
- No sh--. - Oh!
- A ----ing bullet point list.
- No! - She writes this sh-- down.
- I do. I do, you guys.
- Jessel's a gangster.
We got Al Capone in the back seat right now.
- What the-- - Read, like, two aloud.
- Wait, wait, wait, before you start your list,
please tell me you don't have a list about me.
- No, I don't. - OK.
I have a list of people that I have a feeling about.
- It's OK if you have a little list about me.
I'm not gonna hold it against you.
- No, no, no. Me, I want to apologize.
If you have a list for me, I apologize.
- Yeah, yeah, me too.
- [sips]
- Number one is "(BLEEP) you.
"When these girls abandoned you
"for Casa Cipriani, I ----ing stayed
"with your dumb ass and had dinner.
"Number two, you ----ing tell me
"that I'm used to being catered to?
No one and nothing has catered to me."
When someone rubs me the wrong way,
I start making a checklist.
If you rub me the wrong way once,
it's mental. Twice, it's on my phone.
You don't want to be a ----ing Persian rug
on the floor for everyone to walk over.
"You tell me that I ----ing come from a rich family,
and you're accusing my parents of..."
- This is funny.
- "Buying my ----ing apartment?
(BLEEP) you." - That's a Dear John letter.
- This list is longer than a CVS receipt.
- Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
- [trills] - We just found out--
- Jessel's Al Capone.
- Jessel has a list.
- She's had a ----ing--
she's been taking notes the whole time.
- What? - Plot thickens.
- Wait, what? - I'm dying.
- I have zero idea what's going on.
I don't know what an Al Capone list is.
I didn't know Al Capone made lists.
I thought he had a vault.
- All right, this is it. - We're not on the list!
- Oh! - Oh!
- She's a mole!
- I'm not the dumb dumb of the ----ing group.
She is, OK? That's it.
bullsh--. - Yeah.
- I'm trying to diffuse the situation.
We're finally, like, getting Ubah down.
And here comes Jessel.
Girl, don't add fuel to the fire.
It's getting worse. - That's funny as (BLEEP).
She's got the list. - Jessel!
- Talk about it the-- you're like the receipt queen.
I got the receipt. - Holy sh--.
- Also, Brynn is tipsy, probably fanning the fire.
It's comical at this point.
- Really? A list?
- Dude, you have no idea.
A list of sh-- she wanted to say.
You better be not on the list, guys.
You better be not on the list.
- You better hope you're not on the list.
[dramatic music]
- Yo. Yo, what's the list?
- Oh, man, this list is insane.
Dude, dude, you have no idea. - Jessel, this bitch.
- Yeah, listen, everyone thinks
I'm, like, ----ing, like, silent.
- No, we don't think you're silent.
We think you're the mole.
- I can't believe I'm sharing a room with Al Pacino.
- Wait, I thought I was Al Capone.
- Al Capone, Al Pacino, whoever.
* *
[upbeat pop music]
- * Love me, love me, love me, love me *
* *
* Love me loco *
- Hi, guys.
I want to apologize for how I left the house.
But everything is fine.
- Everything is good? - Yeah, everything is good.
- That's what's most important.
- Ubah, come.
Just come here and sit down with me.
- Say it nice. Say it nice way.
- Ubah, can you please come sit down with me?
- Yes.
- From growing up with four younger siblings,
I've learned that, like, sometimes
you just need to step away
and then come back into something.
I'm ready to stay calm and resolve the situation
for the sake of our trip.
- Is there any more of that iced coffee?
- Milady, for you, of course. - [laughs]
There's something about your voice
that, like, is so soothing.
If I can't sleep, you can talk me to sleep.
[laughter]
Last night, I could not sleep at all,
and if you'd have just been talking to me--
- Really? - Yeah.
I would have just been like, "Oh, thanks."
I'll get you to read me a bedtime story.
- I'm just gonna go through--
- Can we actually take sunglasses off?
- Sure.
I was crying because I was really upset,
so that's why I had them on.
- Your eyes are still beautiful.
- I want to talk to you because I actually love you,
and that's why I'm so hurt.
- Do you think I love you, or what do you think?
- I think you do,
but the way you treated me today was shocking.
- OK.
- And it hurt me more because I actually love you.
- OK, you have the right to feel that way.
[tense music]
- OK, so I'm like, "I'm gonna take her phone."
It was, like, a prank the way you threw me
in the pool, and it was really lighthearted,
and the way you behaved today
was so incongruous with what I was doing with you
that it was so shocking.
* *
- OK, I see your point of side.
I had the best day.
Me throwing you in the pool was the best thing,
because the way you came out...
I was cracking up.
I did not think there's anything else left
between you and I. Go to the room,
I'm like, "Where's my phone?"
Why did Erin not give me my phone?
And I'm thinking--
- Because I was trying to prank you back.
- But I did not know that. - Right.
You should have asked me.
- Here's the thing, you already threw me in a pool.
[screams] - Oh, gosh.
- That is my bitch.
- I did not throw you in the pool.
- Did you say that to me when I got thrown in the pool?
Did you say to me, "Bitch"? - No, I said--
- I did not throw you yet? - No, I said to Sai--
I said, "That's my bitch." That's it.
* *
- You have common sense. - What do you mean?
Don't talk to me like that. - No, no, no, no.
- I'm tired of you talking... - No, no, no.
- To me nasty. - Yo, Sai.
There's World War III going on outside.
Do you hear it from out here?
First of all, this is glam.
- Don't talk to me in a condescending way
one more time. - Condescending?
- Yeah, I'm not-- I'm not doing it.
- Condescending? You are a liar.
You just straight up-- - Now I'm a liar?
- You are.
- Yeah, right? I was about to go--
And you know what, this is why I like this bitch.
- She's on her phone.
She's probably adding more to the notes.
- She's got notes.
She's documenting our entire friendship.
That's what she's doing.
- I want nothing to do with this argument.
I'm gonna completely stay as far as I can go.
I'm gonna create content, make some popcorn,
and I'm gonna chill out.
- I need to ask a question.
Not--since the first day we got here,
and you guys had brownies, I have not stopped
thinking about them. Are we having dessert?
- Yes. - Thank God.
What is the dessert?
- Should be brownie. - Good.
- Should be.
- As long as there's chocolate involved,
let me know. - OK.
- I can't look at you the same. - I--listen.
- I never talked to you like that.
I never treated you like that. - Let me tell you something.
- I never called you a piece of sh--.
I--you don't understand why I feel this way.
- Why?
* *
- Can you not hear it?
You all have front row seats to this sh-- show.
Did you hear-- [laughs].
- Wait. That was it. - I want you--
I want you to stay here for a moment.
I'm coming back. Wait for me.
- Please come back. - This is so much fun.
- Brynn? - Yes, my love?
- Where's my phone? - I'll find it. I'll find it.
Was it in the purse? - Hey?
- Go tinkle.
- I think it's in the car.
- She never loses her phone.
She never lets it out of her sight.
Yet, somehow, in the middle of our conversation,
she does not have her phone.
I mean--
- Guess what?
I don't know where my phone is.
- What if someone's playing a prank on you?
- Nobody will.
After I react like that to you, nobody--
I have to report to my family where I am.
- Ubah, I would have given you your phone.
- Every morning, every night.
- I would never keep your phone all night.
- But you say that to me.
- Do you think I was trying to prank you to hurt you?
- I'm worried.
Let's not talk right now
'cause I want to show you something.
- I don't want to wait here all day.
I want to go in the hot tub. - OK, you don't have to then.
We can do later.
- Like, what do you need your phone for?
- But we can do later. - We can have a conver--
- Listen, do not pressure me.
Either we--
- I want to finish this. - Later.
It doesn't matter. - I don't want to talk later.
I want to move on. - OK, how about we're done?
The conversation is over. - OK, so you want to be done?
OK. - Yeah.
- Sure. - Why can't we squash this?
- No, we're done. We're done.
I have extended the olive branch.
I said, let's sit down. - Hollywood branch.
- And let's talk about it. And she has to look--
- Ubah, can we just talk, and can we just...
- She has to look for her phone for 45 minutes.
- Have a nice dinner,
us all laughing, having fun, kumbaya.
- No, she has to find her phone.
I'm gonna put a bathing suit on,
and then I'm gonna drop kick her in the pool.
- Is that my drink? - Yes.
- Ooh, to drink or not to drink?
[chuckles] Just focus, Brynn. Focus.
Don't move.
I'm gonna go try to find my friend's phone.
- All right. - Don't move.
- All right. - Oh, God.
We're all gonna die. We're all gonna die.
Oh, oh, oh, oh!
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
- Drinks delivered by Miss Sai De Silva.
- It's the least I can do.
- It's like finding a Centurion card.
I found the Centurion card.
- Where was it? - Oh, my God!
- It was in the Moke, boo-boo.
- The phone was in the car again?
- In the Moke, yeah.
- Are we even surprised?
- Why people just doesn't stay on my nicer side?
It's so nice.
- What happened over there?
- Listen, Erin is running circle around all of us.
- But here--
- But you're getting accused of throwing someone in a pool.
I got accused of being a slut and ----ing someone's husband.
- But wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
- When you did it--
- Listen, Sai. When you did it--
- I apologized to you for that. We're done.
Like, do not allow this to get in your ear.
- Exactly.
- And it was three weeks for me.
- And it was done. - It was three weeks.
- So now you're starting with me?
- Do you want me to start with you?
- No, I don't. - Yeah, you don't.
- Exactly. - You don't.
- I don't know what the (BLEEP) is going on,
but I was really hoping
that we would have an amazing night.
It is literally the last night.
- It's very, like, ----ed up to my integrity.
- Can we get over that, though?
Like, I thought we buried that one.
- I know, baby. And I--and I'm sorry that--
- No, but it's one thing to be like,
"You pushed me in the pool, you stole my phone."
To say that sh-- about me, it's weird.
As I'm in this hot tub time machine,
I'm starting to, like, swirl a little bit
and realizing that these accusations,
as much as I keep wanting to overlook them as my friend,
it's really reckless.
There's no accountability.
She doesn't hold herself accountable.
I know we don't hold her accountable.
And Abe is so far up her ass, it makes me jealous.
- Yeah, and I mean, in all of this,
it's like, own up to your sh--.
Own up to your sh--.
That's all I ----ing hear from you.
And guess what?
You have not apologized once to anyone here.
- No, she has apologized to me.
- I'm sorry for using that word,
and I am sorry. - We're good.
- And I said that to you. - Let's never again.
Let's not bring it up. - Can you please not,
like, turn on me like this? - Yeah, but to find out today
that you called me a social climber.
- That was ----ing months ago...
- Someone doesn't want to go to--
- Because you ditched me.
- So someone ditches you,
so you accuse them of being a social climber.
- I felt like you don't want to go to sh-- me.
Like, you would rather go to--
does it not--we have this--
it sounds a little social climby.
Brynn is a social climber.
I want to go to Casa Cipriani.
We're going to the zero... I'm not going to sh--.
Oh, which part of the Hamptons are you in?
- We're in an interesting part of the Hamptons.
South is kind of where it's at, but this is good too.
- It was social climbing. Yes, I will admit it.
We resolved it.
Why are you bringing this up now,
because she's riling you up? - No, no, no.
- Be quiet. - Don't tell me what to do.
- Brynn, Brynn. - Don't tell me to be quiet.
- You guys, I really feel like this is like
an ambush right now.
Like, why are we all fighting each other?
- You are. You're like--
- You haven't even seen it yet.
- I'm sorry for calling you that word.
- She's just that person who call people--
- Shut up!
[dramatic music]
- No. - Shut your ----ing mouth.
- It's the truth. - You're such a bitch.
- [sips]
- You are such a bitch. - No, no, you are a bitch.
And guess what? It's coming to you hot.
- Oh. - She is mad at you.
She is mad at you.
None of them are coming to me, telling me sh-- about them.
- You treat everyone like sh-- here.
- No, I am--darling, you can never compare with me.
You know why she's doing this? - Why?
- She doesn't want to get caught that she's a liar.
- Erin's not a liar, but she tends
to start a lot of sh--.
There's a common denominator when everyone is mad at you.
- That's what it is. - A liar about what?
- Everything. - Everything?
- Every-- I lie about everything.
- You are sh-- disturber.
- As this thing is happening, I have three different projects
running at the same time, so I'm working.
So I had to peace out for a while and just focus.
- Once again, I've lost my future spouse.
[laughs] Jenna's is in hiding.
It's actually a pretty good maneuver there,
Future missus.
- I'm getting tired of this. - Oh!
- It's going too far now.
- Why are you reacting the way you are?
- Because it's enough.
She's abusing me, and you guys are--
- I abuse you? - Yeah, you're abusive.
Why won't you stop? - Why did--why did--
- Do you want to talk? - They want that--
- Why are you pushing me in the ground?
- No, no, I'm not. - Enough.
- I'm not. - Enough.
You're making me-- what do you want from me?
I didn't ----ing--like, I took your phone as a joke.
You're trying to get everyone against me.
- It's enough.
- Oh, she called you a social climber
four months ago.
- Guys, I don't think this is good.
- It's enough.
- OK, OK. - It's, like, too much.
What are you doing to me? - Hey.
Come on. Oh, my God, let's not.
- And you too. Like, you?
- It's not-- - You're my ----ing friend.
- You made me feel this way a lot.
You've done this to me. - A lot?
- Can you pass me a popcorn? - I came up to you the minute
you started crying... - Let's just stop.
Let's stop. Enough is enough.
- Like, it's too much. - It's too much.
- Just stop.
- I love Erin, and I never stopped loving Erin,
and I will always love Erin,
but you've got to hold yourself accountable
and be responsible. That's it.
- Erin, I don't know about the rest of these bitches,
but I love you.
I love you. (BLEEP)
You want some popcorn? - Can we go talk somewhere?
I want to have a real conversation.
- Will you guys promise-- set your timer, Ubah...
- I promise-- - Which you like to do.
- You guys are friends. You're friends.
- From now on, my phone is gonna be in my--
- You guys actually are the closest people here.
- You're friends. Resolution.
You guys are friends.
Remember that. - Here's the thing.
I'm honestly a little bit worried about Erin.
- I thought that was totally mean.
- Do I think she probably deserves it?
For sure, because she's, like, stirring the pot and sh--,
but like homegirl is, like-- you can tell when people
start to get like-- it's too much.
- Yeah. - It's a lot.
- Listen, I've been on the other side.
- It's too much. - Like, it's a lot.
- I've been there too. - It's a lot.
- And you know you get that feeling, and you're like--
- It's a lot. It's overwhelming.
Everything has to be aired out.
- I know, but the manner that it was done in...
- No. - It was very unfair.
- But it's always like this.
It's always like this, you guys.
- We just put her in the ----ing corner
with Mike Tyson. - I know.
- Let me start... [sighs deeply]
By saying I love you.
People don't trigger me
until you really mean something to me.
- Well, look what you did to me today.
You got me back.
- And that's because I really care about--
- Listen, if I didn't care about you,
you think I'd be like this? - I know.
- I don't cry like this. - I know. I know.
- You really hurt me. - But here's the thing.
- Like, I'm scared to be friends with you.
- Are they really gonna actually make up right now?
- I don't know.
- I am the realest friend.
- But you called me so many names today.
- I take them back.
- Do you? - All of them.
- 'Cause that really hurt. - OK. Listen to this.
You say at lunch-- - You went too far.
You really did.
Like, the whole thing you did in the pool--
- I did. OK, OK. - Like, too far.
- And also, I want to tell you something.
- Am I a bad friend? - I want to tell you something.
I want to tell you something.
I didn't turn anyone against you.
- Please, people showed their colors today.
- In two minutes, you're the pacifier.
You're like the UN.
You got to go over there, Sai. - Oh, my God, I'm the UN?
- You said a lot of, like, things about me today
that made me, like--
like, I talk sh-- about everyone.
I'm this horrible person.
- The lying thing is bull----,
completely bull----.
The you talking sh-- about people is not bull----.
You know you do. - I don't talk sh--.
- But you do. - I'm telling you what I feel.
- I know, you are sensitive,
and you read things into too much.
You sent emoji. We all have our faults.
- I don't think I was talking--
- Thank you. - Talking sh--, you do.
- You don't talk sh--? - I do, but I admit it.
- OK, fine. I talk sh--. - Yeah, there you go.
- Fine. I'm saying Jessel's annoying.
I'm saying Brynn's a social climber.
These are all facts, OK?
Yeah, sh-- talking.
But I'm not saying anything that no one knows.
This was the dumbest thing ever.
I wish it didn't happen. Trust me.
- OK, I wish that too.
And I'm sorry for taking your glasses off your face,
from the bottom of my heart,
and I'm sorry for keeping it for 45 minutes.
- [laughs]. I don't even care.
- No. You know why I did that?
- I don't care.
- Because your eyes are sensitive.
- Oh, you wanted-- oh, it's even more.
- My karma-- it was raining.
There was no sun.
By the time it was 45 minutes, I had to give your sh-- back.
- The sun came out. - Yeah, I was like, really?
All right. - Let's move on.
- I'm not taking 10 steps back.
- Well, what should we do? Should we start getting ready?
I don't know how long this is gonna take.
- Yeah, let's leave. - Yeah, let's get ready.
- Dude, they're still doing circles.
- Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
- They're getting, like, closer.
They're, like, sitting closer.
They're crying. They're touching.
- Oh, they're holding hands. - Hey, it's over with.
- That's a good sign. - OK.
I'm gonna get in the shower. - Let's get ready for dinner.
- Ah!
[laughter]
- You're a sh-- stirrer. You know it.
I know it. Everyone knows it.
We're moving on. Like, let's have fun.
- I'm sorry. - Don't (BLEEP) with me.
I haven't had sex in a long time.
Don't do that. - Oh, my God.
All right.
- I'm glad this phone frenzy is over
and we can move on to just being friends again
and having fun. - So we're friends?
- Yeah. - Like, for real?
I will never play a prank on this girl ever again.
Mark my words. - Listen, listen.
Let's pretend we didn't make up.
- OK.
- And let's be like, "It's not over."
You know what Erin?
I don't give a (BLEEP). - Go to your room.
- I don't ----ing-- - Go to your room.
- You know what? I don't care.
I'm going to my room, and I'm not going to dinner.
We are done. We're done.
I'm leaving. I'm going--
- Get out of here! - (BLEEP)!
(BLEEP)! - Done, done.
- (BLEEP), (BLEEP), (BLEEP) her!
- Coming up...
- Honey, I'm home. - Hi.
- I'm wet... - [laughs]
- In more ways than one.
[laughter]
[upbeat music]
Survey says nope.
Knock, knock. Honey, I'm home.
- Hi. - I'm wet...
- [laughs]
- In more ways than one.
[laughter]
Let's keep me wet, Jenna.
[laughter]
- Oh, interesting.
I guess we'll have to find out.
Oh, no. Wait, the hair's wet.
- Yeah. - What's happening?
[laughs]
- GTG. DTF, GTG.
You're sparkling everything. Oh, you're being a fancy pants.
Do you want me to put on a fancy dress too?
- Yes.
* *
Hello. - Hi.
- OK, I just have to ask a quick question.
Sai told me everything was good,
and you guys were OK, and then I heard you screaming.
- Oh, that was a joke. - Oh, God.
[laughs]
Thank God, 'cause I don't want to go to dinner
if it's still gonna be more of this.
- No, no, no. It was rough.
They all ganged up on me in the hot tub.
- Wait, seriously? - Like, so intensely.
But I feel like that's how you felt the other night.
- Do you actually believe that I didn't come with you
because I didn't want to fly in coach?
- I think that's, like, a big part of it.
- It really wasn't.
- By the way, it was coming from a good place
that we wanted you to be part of it.
- I don't think you guys gave a sh--
whether I was there on the plane or not.
- That's not true. - You exclude yourself.
- You give us gifts instead of, like, connecting.
- I'm happy that she understands
what it feels like.
I don't--I didn't want her to have to go through that.
It feels like at any given moment,
all of us, except for Ubah, have been in the hot seat.
- Well, sh--, this is why you need a husband,
Jessel, because I cannot lotion my back.
- Here, I'll do it.
- [chuckles] - Let's go.
- I've been drinking by myself for a long time.
I'm all alone. I have nobody to talk to.
- They're not even here.
Can I have some--a little tequila on the rocks, please,
with lime?
- Can she have a lot of tequila on the rocks?
- Hi. How's everyone feeling?
I like this exotic look.
- I gotta get a hair tie, though.
- BRB. - Brynn's hammered.
It's hammer time. - Yeah, what's going on?
- Yeah, she's hammer timed.
I think we're gonna be OK.
I think we're gonna enjoy our last evening together.
- Yeah. That's what I wanted.
- What time do we land? Does anybody remember?
- 9:00. - At night?
- Mm-hm.
- I land right on time for sexy time.
- David will probably be knocked out
and, like, "Go away." - Abe's not home, so--
- Where did he go?
- To Grateful Dead. - Oh.
I can't believe he listens to heavy metal.
- [laughs]
- That was amazing. Like, amazing.
- Legendary.
- He's at the Grateful Dead while I am doing this.
- He's a head banger. - Oh, my God.
Wait, I told Jessel today-- - Can we Facetime him later?
- Hold on.
He's going to Grateful Dead at Papaya.
And she's like, "Oh my God,
I didn't know he liked heavy metal."
[laughs]
- Who said that?
- Why would I ever know who Grateful Dead is?
- Oh, wait, did you hear the Al Capone thing?
I don't--did you-- what happened to that?
Because I was not in the Jacuzzi,
so I don't know where that went.
- What happened?
- So apparently she keeps notes on what everyone says
and how she feels in that moment
so she can bring it up at another later date.
[laughs] - That's wild.
- She's like, "Erin said--"
- Wait, did it get discussed at all?
- I don't know how you're not getting sh--.
- It didn't get discussed at all?
- I don't know how you're not getting sh--.
- What do I do?
Maybe it's because I genuinely don't give a (BLEEP).
- I think that's what it is.
Like, you actually don't care.
- I'm like, "Damn, you feel like that about me?
I'm sorry." - I feel badly for you.
- Like when Ubah was talking about how she's short,
she was like, "I can't help it."
- These are my ----ing characteristics.
What, do you want me to hang from a tree?
Like, I can't-- - Oh, thank you.
- Oh, is this a crab cake? - It's a crab cake.
- Oh, thank you. - I love a crab cake.
Are we gonna eat without them?
- Yeah, I am gonna eat without them.
- What happened to Brynn? She was here.
- Brynn!
- We did bangs.
I love bangs.
- I loved you in your natural form,
but I appreciate the do. - It's just ba--
I like bangs.
If I feel good, I act like a fool.
We're missing somebody.
We're missing some-- wait, are we missing people?
- Two people. - I always forget about Jessel.
Not like that, you know just technically.
Oh, where's Jessel?
(BLEEP), I mean, it's like-- it's been a long day.
- Hi. - Wow.
- Sorry to hold you-- oh, my God, you look--
- Wow. - Dinner was two hours ago.
- Gorgeous. - I'm so sorry, you guys.
- You should be so sorry.
- Watercolor sh-- over here. - [hiccups]
I have hiccups.
I'm drunk, but I don't want to sound like a drunk.
- You know how much I love you?
- Oh!
[applause]
Friends, friends, friends, friends.
Huge, massive progress.
Mountains have been moved,
and now it feels like maybe there's hope.
Sometimes I think a little bit why people--
when you can fight that hard and that deep,
it's because that's family.
We tend to get mad when the people
that we love the most hurt us.
What's funny? Let's play a game.
- We can do favorite outfits. - Oh, yeah.
Let's do that.
We pick one favorite outfit out of the group.
- Yeah, I can do-- I can do yours.
- This one might be it for me, too.
- Really? - Can you please stand up?
- OK.
So what do you want to see, this?
- Yes! [all cheer]
- And the jewelry.
- That's my roommate. That's my roommate.
OK, I'm gonna go.
Jenna, the pink and the yellow--
I could not stop talking about it.
- That was good. - It was chic as (BLEEP).
- You should dress like that more often.
- I had more fun than I thought I was going to,
and while I could have had a dark moment,
it was fun.
I gave myself a 5 and C for the Hamptons trip.
I think this one I give myself a B-plus and like a 7.
I'm getting better.
- My turn.
Brynn, I love this orange outfit on her.
It looks really great with her complexion.
- I do too.
- This is like if Brynn was a dress, this is it.
[laughter]
- So all in all, the trip was a success.
Ubah, I love this outfit. I think it's very beautiful,
but I love your two piece earlier.
I think you look really good in two pieces.
- Yeah.
- Oh, the one from this morning?
- Yeah, I think she pulls off two pieces very, very well.
Sometimes you fight. Sometimes you love each other.
Sometimes you're gonna laugh.
You're gonna get mad. You're gonna cry.
That's a friendship, but at the end of the day,
we're all there for each other. And you know what?
We bonded. Wait, London's writing me.
She's at a slumber party,
and I want to make sure she's-- - Aw.
- Oh, look. - Oh, my God.
- Take a picture.
- Look at her friends. - Send one back. Samesies.
- OK, OK, OK. - Yeah.
- Guys, I have to take a picture for my daughter.
She's at a slumber party. - We're sending to London.
- Let's take it.
Are you sending it to your daughter?
- Yeah. - It's a photo, not a video.
- Love all of you, but let's go pack.
* *
- Next time on "The Real Housewives
of New York City"...
- Mommy's friends are so crazy. I'm so happy to be back.
- ASMR.
[cookies crackling]
- Is this hooker-ish enough? - [laughs]
Oh, this is interesting. - Is that right?
- This is your dinner outfit now?
- How long have you been single?
- Not long enough.
[all cheering]
- If your wife did not have sex with you
for a year and a half, what would happen?
- I would (BLEEP) other women. - [laughs]
- Abe, oh my God.
- [laughing]
- Hi! [chuckles]
- We're getting some healing. We're getting some healing.
- [drumming] [high-pitched ululating]
- [quiet sobbing]
- When you were telling your story about your mom,
I also had, like, a similar situation, right?
And Uncle Nitin, he was an alcoholic.
- Babe, it's apples and oranges with my story.
I'm done.
The check.