1 00:00:00,471 --> 00:00:02,371 (static) 2 00:00:02,373 --> 00:00:05,643 (man) I'VE PLAYED LOU REED, JIMMY REED, EVEN JERRY REED... 3 00:00:05,636 --> 00:00:09,076 R.E.M., PiL, XTC... 4 00:00:09,080 --> 00:00:11,280 AND NOW... 5 00:00:11,282 --> 00:00:13,212 THEY'RE PAVING PARADISE. 6 00:00:13,214 --> 00:00:16,254 THREE HOURS AGO, THIS STATION OFFICIALLY BECAME THE PROPERTY 7 00:00:16,247 --> 00:00:20,187 OF AN ENORMOUS, FACELESS CONGLOMERATE... 8 00:00:20,191 --> 00:00:25,061 (pounds on door) AND NOW MY STATION MANAGER IS TRYING TO BEAT DOWN THE DOOR 9 00:00:25,056 --> 00:00:28,156 AS I HAVE DECIDED TO IGNORE 10 00:00:28,159 --> 00:00:30,629 THE FOCUS-GROUPED, MARKET-TESTED PLAYLIST 11 00:00:30,631 --> 00:00:34,111 PROVIDED BY OUR NEW CORPORATE MASTERS. 12 00:00:34,105 --> 00:00:35,435 AH. 13 00:00:35,436 --> 00:00:38,236 I'M JACK KOZAKOWSKI, 14 00:00:38,239 --> 00:00:40,369 AND I PLAY WHAT I WANT... 15 00:00:40,371 --> 00:00:42,541 AT LEAST FOR A FEW MORE HOURS. 16 00:00:42,543 --> 00:00:44,043 (mouths word) 17 00:00:45,816 --> 00:00:50,346 THERE IS SOMEONE I NEED TO HEAR FROM-- 18 00:00:50,351 --> 00:00:52,381 MY FAVORITE CALLER... 19 00:00:52,383 --> 00:00:54,493 BECAUSE AS SOON AS WE START TO PLAY... 20 00:00:54,485 --> 00:00:57,155 (smarmy voice) ALL THE HITS... 21 00:00:57,158 --> 00:00:59,458 (normal voice) SHE IS NEVER GOING TO LISTEN 22 00:00:59,460 --> 00:01:00,690 TO THIS STATION AGAIN. 23 00:01:00,691 --> 00:01:03,131 SO IF YOU'RE LISTENING, 24 00:01:03,134 --> 00:01:05,144 SWEET JANE, CALL ME. 25 00:01:05,136 --> 00:01:07,136 YES, I CALLED IN A TO GO ORDER. 26 00:01:07,138 --> 00:01:10,798 AS YOU PREDICTED, I'M NOW JONESING FOR FELIX'S MOLE SAUCE 27 00:01:10,801 --> 00:01:12,301 ON A DAILY BASIS. 28 00:01:12,303 --> 00:01:13,843 YOU MADE MY PASSION 29 00:01:13,844 --> 00:01:16,614 FOR THESE LITTLE SLABS OF WAX AND ACETATE EVEN GREATER. 30 00:01:16,607 --> 00:01:19,107 PLEASE LET ME, ONE LAST TIME, 31 00:01:19,110 --> 00:01:21,250 JUST PLAY WHATEVER YOUR HEART DESIRES. 32 00:01:21,252 --> 00:01:23,752 WHAT ARE WE LISTENING TO? TUT-TUT-TUT. 33 00:01:23,754 --> 00:01:25,764 THE SOONER THE BETTER, JANE. 34 00:01:25,756 --> 00:01:27,756 ALL I GOT HERE IS A GRANOLA BAR. 35 00:01:27,758 --> 00:01:29,758 THE BASTARDS ARE GONNA STARVE ME OUT. 36 00:01:29,760 --> 00:01:33,160 ♪♪ 37 00:01:33,164 --> 00:01:36,174 OKAY, I PUT AN EXTRA CONTAINER OF MOLE SAUCE IN HERE. 38 00:01:36,167 --> 00:01:39,167 YOU WILL BE TEMPTED TO DRINK IT. I RECOMMEND YOU DON'T. 39 00:01:39,170 --> 00:01:42,200 (chuckles) TREVOR, THAT'S MY MOLE. GET HER ANYTHING SHE WANTS, ON ME. 40 00:01:42,203 --> 00:01:45,213 I GOT A MATCH TO MAKE. 41 00:01:45,206 --> 00:01:47,106 HUH. 42 00:01:47,107 --> 00:01:49,837 I GUESS I'LL JUST COVER HIS SHIFT... 43 00:01:49,840 --> 00:01:51,510 AND FEED HIS PSYCHIATRIST. 44 00:01:55,586 --> 00:01:58,216 CLOSING TIME. 45 00:01:58,219 --> 00:02:01,219 LAST CALL FOR DRINKS. 46 00:02:01,222 --> 00:02:03,222 I APPRECIATE THE SUPPORT. 47 00:02:03,224 --> 00:02:07,364 I DO. I HAVE RECEIVED DOZENS OF CALLS, 48 00:02:07,358 --> 00:02:10,128 JUST NOT THE ONE I WANTED. 49 00:02:12,233 --> 00:02:14,213 OH, AND LOOK AT THAT. 50 00:02:14,205 --> 00:02:16,135 A CALL ON THE BATPHONE. 51 00:02:16,136 --> 00:02:17,866 YOU'RE ON WITH JACK. 52 00:02:17,868 --> 00:02:19,768 (woman) Hi, Jack. 53 00:02:19,770 --> 00:02:21,840 SWEET JANE. (laughs) 54 00:02:21,842 --> 00:02:23,842 I KNEW YOU'D TURN UP. 55 00:02:23,844 --> 00:02:26,354 HAVE YOU CALLED WITH A REQUEST? 56 00:02:26,347 --> 00:02:28,847 "Build Havana" by Future Clouds and Radar. 57 00:02:28,849 --> 00:02:32,549 MY FAVORITE SONG BY ONE OF MY FAVORITE ARTISTS. 58 00:02:32,553 --> 00:02:35,933 Robert Harrison, the Elvis of artsy power pop. 59 00:02:35,926 --> 00:02:38,786 I SUPPOSE I SHOULD JUST LAY IT ON THE LINE. 60 00:02:38,789 --> 00:02:40,389 WE BOTH KNOW THAT 61 00:02:40,391 --> 00:02:43,291 YOU'RE NEVER GONNA LISTEN TO THIS SHOW AGAIN AFTER TODAY. 62 00:02:43,294 --> 00:02:46,904 UH... THIS IS OUR LAST CALL. 63 00:02:46,897 --> 00:02:51,197 LET'S MEET, FACE-TO-FACE. 64 00:02:51,202 --> 00:02:54,312 WE'VE GOT SOMETHING HERE, JANE, SOMETHING RARE. 65 00:02:56,347 --> 00:02:59,347 I'm sorry, Jack. I can't. 66 00:02:59,350 --> 00:03:01,310 (line disconnects) 67 00:03:01,312 --> 00:03:04,322 (dial tone) 68 00:03:09,220 --> 00:03:12,490 ("Build Havana" playing) 69 00:03:18,699 --> 00:03:24,199 ♪ SHE GETS SO BROKEN UP, SHE CAN'T MEND ♪ 70 00:03:27,378 --> 00:03:32,308 ♪ AND I GET SO BLOWN AWAY, I CAN'T UNDERSTAND ♪ 71 00:03:32,313 --> 00:03:35,393 YOU CROSSED A LINE TODAY, JACK. (scoffs) 72 00:03:35,386 --> 00:03:37,916 CORPORATE IS GONNA HAVE YOUR HEAD. 73 00:03:37,918 --> 00:03:39,918 WE BOTH KNOW THAT'S NOT HAPPENING, SUSSMAN. 74 00:03:39,920 --> 00:03:41,920 I'M THE GINGER ROGERS TO CORPORATE'S FRED ASTAIRE. 75 00:03:41,922 --> 00:03:45,232 THEY GIVE ME A PAYCHECK, AND I GIVE 'EM CLASS. (record needle scratches) 76 00:03:45,225 --> 00:03:47,655 (woman) ♪ I WANNA BE WITH YOU TONIGHT ♪ 77 00:03:47,658 --> 00:03:50,658 TOMORROW THEN. 78 00:03:50,661 --> 00:03:52,331 OH. 79 00:03:52,333 --> 00:03:55,443 OH, IT'S YOU. FOOD GUY. (chuckles) 80 00:03:55,436 --> 00:03:56,936 FOOD GUY/LOVE DETECTIVE. 81 00:03:56,937 --> 00:03:59,237 I'M GONNA HELP YOU FIND SWEET JANE. 82 00:04:06,977 --> 00:04:09,977 (mouth full) THIS IS HOW I THOUGHT MY DAY WOULD GO-- 83 00:04:09,980 --> 00:04:12,550 GET SHOT DOWN BY MY DREAM GIRL ON THE RADIO 84 00:04:12,553 --> 00:04:15,563 AND THEN BRING SOME STRANGE DUDE BACK TO MY APARTMENT 85 00:04:15,556 --> 00:04:17,356 TO BINGE ON MEXICAN FOOD... 86 00:04:17,358 --> 00:04:20,728 THAT'S APPARENTLY LACED WITH CRACK. SHE WASN'T SHOOTING YOU DOWN. 87 00:04:20,731 --> 00:04:24,261 SHE WAS FLIRTING WITH YOU. YOU'RE HIGH. I'VE BEEN FLIRTING WITH SWEET JANE 88 00:04:24,264 --> 00:04:26,274 ON THE REQUEST LINE FOR FIVE YEARS. 89 00:04:26,266 --> 00:04:28,266 I KNOW WHAT FLIRTING SOUNDS LIKE. 90 00:04:28,268 --> 00:04:30,838 TODAY-- THAT WAS SHOOTING DOWN. 91 00:04:30,841 --> 00:04:32,971 WHAT IF SHE'D HAD SAID, "YEAH, LET'S MEET"? 92 00:04:32,973 --> 00:04:35,983 WHAT WAS THE PLAN THEN? THAT'S THE POINT. I WOULDN'T NEED A PLAN. 93 00:04:35,976 --> 00:04:38,306 WE'RE THE SAME PERSON. WE HAVE THE SAME TASTE. 94 00:04:38,309 --> 00:04:42,049 ALL THE THINGS THAT I LOVE TO DO--GOING OUT, SEEING BANDS, 95 00:04:42,052 --> 00:04:44,792 TRAVELING, YOU KNOW, LOUNGING AROUND ON WEEKENDS, 96 00:04:44,785 --> 00:04:47,915 LISTENING TO RECORDS, TALKING ABOUT MUSIC-- 97 00:04:47,918 --> 00:04:51,318 SHE WOULD HAVE BEEN MY PARTNER IN CRIME. 98 00:04:51,322 --> 00:04:55,372 THIS IS THE ONLY TANGIBLE THING I HAVE FROM HER. 99 00:04:55,366 --> 00:04:58,796 SHE SENT IT TO THE STATION A WHILE BACK. A 45? 100 00:04:58,799 --> 00:05:01,869 NO, NOT JUST ANY 45. 101 00:05:01,872 --> 00:05:03,072 OTIS REDDING-- 102 00:05:03,073 --> 00:05:05,743 "YOU LEFT THE WATER RUNNING"... 103 00:05:05,736 --> 00:05:07,676 RELEASED POSTHUMOUSLY. 104 00:05:10,010 --> 00:05:13,440 THERE WAS NO RETURN ADDRESS ON THE ENVELOPE. I CHECKED. 105 00:05:13,444 --> 00:05:15,794 WELL, WE NOW KNOW HOW TO FIND HER. 106 00:05:15,786 --> 00:05:16,916 HOW'S THAT? 107 00:05:16,917 --> 00:05:19,347 WELL, BECAUSE, DEAR WATSON, 108 00:05:19,350 --> 00:05:21,850 WE NOW KNOW THAT SHE'S THE TYPE OF GIRL 109 00:05:21,852 --> 00:05:25,602 THAT FORGETS TO TAKE THE PRICE TAG OFF GIFTS. 110 00:05:25,596 --> 00:05:27,926 VINYL COUNTDOWN-- 111 00:05:27,928 --> 00:05:30,398 THAT'S IN QUEENS. 112 00:05:30,401 --> 00:05:33,461 I HAVE THE AFTERNOON FREE. YOU? 113 00:05:33,464 --> 00:05:36,844 (soul music playing) 114 00:05:36,837 --> 00:05:38,937 "YOU LEFT THE WATER RUNNING"-- 115 00:05:38,939 --> 00:05:42,969 '76, A TINY MEMPHIS LABEL RELEASED IT, 116 00:05:42,973 --> 00:05:46,553 BUT NOBODY BOTHERED TO CLEAR IT WITH OTIS REDDING'S ESTATE. 117 00:05:46,547 --> 00:05:50,077 THE LAWYERS PULLED IT AND BOOM! INSTANT COLLECTOR'S ITEM. 118 00:05:50,080 --> 00:05:53,480 THIS PLACE IS A TREASURE TROVE. 119 00:05:53,484 --> 00:05:55,934 WHY DON'T YOU GET MORE TRAFFIC? 120 00:05:55,926 --> 00:05:59,786 BECAUSE WE DON'T CARRY ANYTHING RELEASED AFTER AUGUST 1st, 1981. 121 00:05:59,790 --> 00:06:01,360 WHY AUGUST 198-- 122 00:06:01,361 --> 00:06:04,091 BLACK SATURDAY. IT'S THE DAY MTV PREMIERED. 123 00:06:04,094 --> 00:06:07,074 AS YOU CAN SEE, RIGHTEOUS LINES IN THE SAND 124 00:06:07,067 --> 00:06:10,097 DON'T MAKE FOR OUTSTANDING BUSINESS MODELS. 125 00:06:10,100 --> 00:06:11,800 DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA 126 00:06:11,802 --> 00:06:14,812 WHAT WOMAN BOUGHT THIS FROM YOU TWO YEARS AGO? HOLD ON. 127 00:06:14,805 --> 00:06:19,545 LET ME CHECK MY EXTENSIVE COMPUTER DATABASE OF PURCHASES. 128 00:06:19,550 --> 00:06:21,550 NO IDEA. 129 00:06:21,552 --> 00:06:24,522 SHE PREFERS ATLANTIC RECORDS SOUL TO MOTOWN. 130 00:06:24,515 --> 00:06:26,985 HER FAVORITE CLASH ALBUM IS "SANDINISTA." 131 00:06:26,987 --> 00:06:29,787 "SANDINISTA." AH, OKAY, RINGING A BELL. 132 00:06:29,790 --> 00:06:32,590 THERE'S A WOMAN WHO USED TO COME HERE. 133 00:06:32,593 --> 00:06:34,873 NAME? SOUNDS LIKE? 134 00:06:34,865 --> 00:06:36,165 STARTS WITH? 135 00:06:36,166 --> 00:06:38,996 YEAH. UM... I GOT NOTHING. 136 00:06:38,999 --> 00:06:41,069 WAIT. SHE'D STOP IN AFTER WORK SOMETIMES. 137 00:06:41,071 --> 00:06:44,811 WORE A SMOCK THING FROM, UH... 138 00:06:44,805 --> 00:06:46,575 FROM... 139 00:06:46,577 --> 00:06:47,977 (mouths word) 140 00:06:47,978 --> 00:06:49,978 (The Service Industry's "Bookstores and Restaurants" 141 00:06:49,980 --> 00:06:51,980 playing) 142 00:06:51,982 --> 00:06:53,982 GROCERY TOWN. SHE'S HERE. I KNOW IT. 143 00:06:53,984 --> 00:06:57,994 HOW? THEY'RE PLAYING THE SERVICE INDUSTRY. 144 00:06:57,988 --> 00:07:00,848 MUCH HYPED INDIE POWER POP BAND OUT OF AUSTIN? 145 00:07:00,851 --> 00:07:02,791 YOU KNOW, INSTEAD OF MUZAK? 146 00:07:02,793 --> 00:07:07,433 (woman) PRICE CHECK FOR MAMA PAVIA SPAGHETTI SAUCE. 147 00:07:07,427 --> 00:07:10,797 ♪ BOOKSTORES AND RESTAURANTS ♪ 148 00:07:10,801 --> 00:07:12,931 ♪ BOOKSTORES AND RESTAURANTS ♪ 149 00:07:12,933 --> 00:07:14,543 (beep) 150 00:07:14,535 --> 00:07:15,965 SWEET JANE? 151 00:07:15,966 --> 00:07:18,936 ♪♪ 152 00:07:18,939 --> 00:07:21,069 YOUR NAMETAG MIGHT SAY "SARAH," 153 00:07:21,071 --> 00:07:23,141 BUT I'D KNOW YOUR VOICE ANYWHERE. 154 00:07:23,143 --> 00:07:24,583 OH, GOD. 155 00:07:24,575 --> 00:07:27,775 WHY'D YOU HAVE TO FIND ME? THIS RUINS EVERYTHING. 156 00:07:27,778 --> 00:07:32,118 ♪ BOOKSTORES AND RESTAURANTS ♪ 157 00:07:32,122 --> 00:07:37,032 ♪♪ 158 00:07:45,065 --> 00:07:47,135 I... 159 00:07:47,137 --> 00:07:49,597 SUPPOSE I, UH, 160 00:07:49,600 --> 00:07:52,640 WAS HOPING FOR A SLIGHTLY MORE, UM, 161 00:07:52,643 --> 00:07:54,143 I DON'T KNOW, UM, 162 00:07:54,144 --> 00:07:57,584 ENTHUSIASTIC, MAYBE, RESPONSE. 163 00:07:57,578 --> 00:08:00,148 I THOUGHT WE'D HAVE SOMETHING LIKE WE HAVE ON THE RADIO. 164 00:08:00,150 --> 00:08:02,010 WHAT WE HAD ON THE RADIO WAS GREAT, 165 00:08:02,012 --> 00:08:05,062 BUT I ALREADY HAVE TOO MANY MEN IN MY LIFE. 166 00:08:05,055 --> 00:08:07,885 (woman over P.A.) MANAGER TO REGISTER SIX. 167 00:08:07,888 --> 00:08:09,988 LOOK, I GOTTA GO. I'M SORRY, JACK. 168 00:08:09,990 --> 00:08:12,090 I JUST--I HAD YOU FILED 169 00:08:12,092 --> 00:08:13,992 IN A VERY SPECIFIC PLACE IN MY LIFE. 170 00:08:13,994 --> 00:08:17,034 IT WORKED FOR ME. 171 00:08:17,027 --> 00:08:19,027 WELL, I'LL JUST LEAVE THEN. 172 00:08:19,029 --> 00:08:21,699 YEAH, WITH MY DIGNITY SHATTERED. 173 00:08:21,702 --> 00:08:23,072 IT'S... IT'S COOL. 174 00:08:23,073 --> 00:08:24,813 IT'S... 175 00:08:27,177 --> 00:08:29,137 WELL, I GUESS IT'S TRUE. 176 00:08:29,139 --> 00:08:31,909 I DO HAVE A FACE MADE FOR RADIO. 177 00:08:31,912 --> 00:08:33,912 BUT I GUESS IF IT DIDN'T HURT, 178 00:08:33,914 --> 00:08:36,594 PEOPLE WOULDN'T WRITE SONGS ABOUT IT 179 00:08:36,587 --> 00:08:39,047 OR TAKE THE QUICK ROUTE TO THE TOP OF THE LIBRARY TOWER. WHOA, WHOA, WHOA. YOU'RE RUNNING UP THE WHITE FLAG 180 00:08:39,049 --> 00:08:41,849 WHEN OUR TROOPS CAN STILL TAKE THE HILL. 181 00:08:41,852 --> 00:08:44,862 ONCE MORE TO THE BREACH. YOU HEARD WHAT SHE SAID. TOO MANY MEN IN HER LIFE? 182 00:08:44,855 --> 00:08:46,855 YEAH, SEE, I SEE THAT AS AN OPENING. 183 00:08:46,857 --> 00:08:48,857 SHE'S NOT CURRENTLY EXCLUSIVE WITH ANYONE. 184 00:08:48,859 --> 00:08:50,859 AT LEAST WE KNOW OUR TASK AT HAND. 185 00:08:50,861 --> 00:08:54,001 I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M SAYING THIS, BUT I'M LISTENING. 186 00:08:57,768 --> 00:08:59,938 A FEW OF YOU HAVE EXPRESSED YOUR DESIRE 187 00:08:59,940 --> 00:09:02,810 FOR OUR MEETING TO FOCUS MORE ON MEETING SINGLES 188 00:09:02,813 --> 00:09:06,153 RATHER THAN JUST TALKING ABOUT BEING SINGLE. 189 00:09:06,146 --> 00:09:10,716 YES! TOWARD THAT END, I'D LIKE TO SET UP SIMPLE COFFEE DATES 190 00:09:10,721 --> 00:09:14,051 FOR ANY OF YOU WHO ARE WILLING TO BRAVE BEING SET UP. 191 00:09:14,054 --> 00:09:17,094 YES! I'LL BE E-MAILING EACH OF YOU 192 00:09:17,087 --> 00:09:19,287 AN ONLINE QUESTIONNAIRE THAT I'M DEVELOPING 193 00:09:19,289 --> 00:09:22,659 FOR DATEWELL, A NEW INTERNET MATCHMAKING SERVICE. 194 00:09:22,663 --> 00:09:28,143 NO. CLAIRE, COMPUTERS ARE FOR MULTIPLAYER ROLE-PLAYING GAMES 195 00:09:28,138 --> 00:09:30,138 AND POSTING FUNNY VIDEOS OF YOUR CAT. 196 00:09:30,140 --> 00:09:32,240 THEY CAN'T FIND SOMEONE A SOUL MATE. 197 00:09:32,242 --> 00:09:34,242 THEY CAN IDENTIFY INTERESTS PEOPLE SHARE 198 00:09:34,244 --> 00:09:37,914 SO THEY DON'T WASTE THEIR TIME WITH INCOMPATIBLE PARTNERS. 199 00:09:37,908 --> 00:09:40,108 I NEED A FEW GOOD MEN AND WOMEN--100 OF EACH-- 200 00:09:40,110 --> 00:09:41,810 TO BE GUINEA PIGS. 201 00:09:41,812 --> 00:09:46,122 SO WE HAVE TO HAVE COFFEE WITH A HUNDRED MEN? 202 00:09:46,116 --> 00:09:47,656 NO. 203 00:09:47,658 --> 00:09:49,658 JUST WITH THE PERSON YOU'RE MATCHED WITH. 204 00:09:49,660 --> 00:09:52,820 AND YOU DON'T HAVE TO. IT'S COMPLETELY VOLUNTARY. 205 00:09:52,823 --> 00:09:54,323 ARE YOU GETTING THIS? 206 00:09:54,324 --> 00:09:57,134 DID SAMSON AND DELILAH NEED A COMPUTER? 207 00:09:57,127 --> 00:10:00,167 DID BRAD AND JEN? DID YOUR PARENTS? 208 00:10:00,170 --> 00:10:02,930 ARE YOU SURE THESE ARE THE EXAMPLES YOU WANT TO USE? 209 00:10:02,933 --> 00:10:04,943 WE'RE WILLING TO PUT SO MUCH 210 00:10:04,935 --> 00:10:07,135 INTO THE HANDS OF THESE MACHINES. 211 00:10:07,137 --> 00:10:08,637 WHERE DOES IT END? 212 00:10:08,639 --> 00:10:10,639 WHEN DO WE SAY "NO MORE"? 213 00:10:10,641 --> 00:10:13,781 WHEN DO WE, LIKE, JOHN HENRY, TAKE HAMMER IN HAND 214 00:10:13,784 --> 00:10:16,654 AND BEAT THAT STEAM ENGINE DOWN? 215 00:10:16,647 --> 00:10:18,987 RIGHT NOW WE CAN SAY, "NO, THANKS, COMPUTERS. 216 00:10:18,989 --> 00:10:22,219 I GOT IT COVERED HERE." OTHERWISE, SOON ENOUGH, 217 00:10:22,222 --> 00:10:25,802 WE'RE ALL THOSE LITTLE FAT PEOPLE AT THE END OF "WALL-E." 218 00:10:25,796 --> 00:10:28,656 SO WHO'S WITH ME? 219 00:10:28,659 --> 00:10:32,159 WHO WILL JOIN ME IN SAYING, "ENOUGH IS ENOUGH"? 220 00:10:32,162 --> 00:10:34,002 (Claire) LET'S ASK. 221 00:10:34,004 --> 00:10:37,114 HOW MANY OF YOU ARE GAME TO TRY DATEWELL? 222 00:10:44,644 --> 00:10:47,424 PROPER MATCHMAKING REQUIRES A BOUTIQUE ATTENTION TO DETAIL. 223 00:10:47,417 --> 00:10:49,777 OKAY? LIKE JACK ON THE RADIO THIS MORNING? 224 00:10:49,780 --> 00:10:52,150 I'M MATCHING HIM WITH A GIRL HE'D NEVER SEEN. 225 00:10:52,152 --> 00:10:55,192 CAN YOU DIG IT? LOVE AT FIRST SOUND. 226 00:10:55,185 --> 00:10:58,185 COMPUTERS CAN'T DO THAT. THE QUESTIONNAIRE I'M DEVELOPING WOULD HAVE DISCOVERED 227 00:10:58,188 --> 00:11:00,888 THE SAME CONNECTION BUT WITH MUCH LESS DRAMA. 228 00:11:00,891 --> 00:11:03,791 I GOT LOCKED UP FOR SUGGESTING THAT I HAVE A DIVINE GIFT 229 00:11:03,794 --> 00:11:07,104 FOR DOING EXACTLY WHAT YOU'RE TRYING TO DO. YOU GOT LOCKED UP FOR THE "DIVINITY" PART, 230 00:11:07,097 --> 00:11:09,997 NOT THE "GIFT" PART, AND I DON'T CLAIM OMNISCIENCE. 231 00:11:10,000 --> 00:11:12,070 I'M MEETING WITH A STATISTICIAN 232 00:11:12,072 --> 00:11:15,012 WHO'S HELPING ME CRUNCH THE NUMBERS. STATISTICIAN? THIS IS WHAT WE'VE COME TO? 233 00:11:15,005 --> 00:11:17,375 YOU ACTUALLY BELIEVE THAT YOU AND SOME NERD 234 00:11:17,377 --> 00:11:19,177 CAN DO GOD'S WORK? 235 00:11:19,179 --> 00:11:22,079 AHEM. HI. 236 00:11:22,082 --> 00:11:23,752 I'M THE, UH, NERD. (laughs) 237 00:11:23,754 --> 00:11:27,164 PETER KARNOW. IT'S GREAT TO FINALLY MEET YOU, DR. McCRAE. 238 00:11:27,157 --> 00:11:28,957 I READ YOUR BOOK. 239 00:11:28,959 --> 00:11:31,689 YOUR WORK ON PERSONALITY SIGN POSTING IS DEAD-ON. 240 00:11:31,691 --> 00:11:33,691 WELL, THANK YOU. THAT'S--THAT'S VERY KIND. 241 00:11:33,693 --> 00:11:35,973 AND PLEASE, CALL ME CLAIRE. (Trevor) AHEM. 242 00:11:35,966 --> 00:11:38,396 THIS IS TREVOR. HE'S A STEEL-DRIVING MAN 243 00:11:38,398 --> 00:11:41,398 WHO HAS AN IMPORTANT APPOINTMENT WHICH WILL SADLY CUT SHORT 244 00:11:41,401 --> 00:11:43,371 HIS ABILITY TO STAY AND CHAT. 245 00:11:43,373 --> 00:11:46,383 REALLY? I HAVE TO GO? 'CAUSE I WANTED TO BE HERE 246 00:11:46,376 --> 00:11:50,236 WHEN YOU PULLED OUT YOUR CALCULATOR AND QUANTIFIED LOVE. 247 00:11:50,240 --> 00:11:51,940 GOOD NIGHT, TREVOR. 248 00:11:51,942 --> 00:11:55,352 I'M SIGNING UP, BY THE WAY. I HOPE MY DATE LIKES PI. 249 00:11:55,345 --> 00:11:58,085 AND BY PI, I MEAN THE RELATION 250 00:11:58,088 --> 00:12:00,918 OF MY CIRCUMFERENCE TO MY DIAMETER. 251 00:12:03,453 --> 00:12:05,003 WOW. 252 00:12:04,995 --> 00:12:06,195 YEAH. (laughs) 253 00:12:06,196 --> 00:12:08,756 THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR MEETING ME HERE TONIGHT. 254 00:12:08,759 --> 00:12:12,129 THIS WILL BE VERY HELPFUL. YEAH, IT WILL BE. I MET WITH KELSEY STANZLER EARLIER, 255 00:12:12,132 --> 00:12:15,772 AND WE COVERED A LOT OF GROUND. KELSEY STANZLER, THE ADVICE COLUMNIST 256 00:12:15,766 --> 00:12:18,106 FROM "THE VILLAGE VOICE"? 257 00:12:18,108 --> 00:12:20,768 I DIDN'T REALIZE DATEWELL WAS USING MORE THAN ONE EXPERT. 258 00:12:20,771 --> 00:12:22,771 YOU'RE COVERING COMMON INTEREST AND VALUES, 259 00:12:22,773 --> 00:12:25,183 AND SHE'S ALL ABOUT ATTRACTION AND DESIRE, 260 00:12:25,175 --> 00:12:28,975 WHICH CAN BE IMPORTANT AS WELL, DON'T YOU THINK? 261 00:12:28,979 --> 00:12:31,379 SOMETIMES THOSE THINGS CAN'T BE OVERLOOKED. 262 00:12:37,027 --> 00:12:39,327 THE KEITH TO JACK'S MICK. 263 00:12:39,329 --> 00:12:41,359 WE WERE NEVER FORMALLY INTRODUCED. 264 00:12:41,361 --> 00:12:44,531 THE NAME'S TREVOR, AND THAT CHOCOLATE BAR'S DEFECTIVE. 265 00:12:44,534 --> 00:12:47,844 YOU MEAN IT'S STALE? NO, I WAS HOPING FOR A GOLDEN TICKET. 266 00:12:47,838 --> 00:12:51,498 INSTEAD THERE'S SOMETHING WRITTEN INSIDE THE WRAPPER. I REALLY DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS. 267 00:12:51,501 --> 00:12:53,171 COME ON. JUST GO WITH IT. 268 00:12:53,173 --> 00:12:55,153 YOU EVER DO A SCAVENGER HUNT? 269 00:12:55,145 --> 00:12:58,345 YOU KNOW, WHERE YOU FOLLOW THE CLUES? I'M FAMILIAR WITH THE CONCEPT. 270 00:12:58,348 --> 00:13:01,008 THIS ONE'S HERE, IN THIS MARKET. 271 00:13:01,011 --> 00:13:04,111 IT'LL LEAD YOU TO JACK. 272 00:13:04,114 --> 00:13:07,324 "WHAT'S THE BEST PRINCE SONG OF THE EIGHTIES?" 273 00:13:07,317 --> 00:13:09,057 "RASPBERRY BERET." 274 00:13:09,059 --> 00:13:10,389 SORBET, BERET. 275 00:13:10,390 --> 00:13:12,920 "THE GREATEST 2:00 A.M. ALBUM EVER." 276 00:13:12,923 --> 00:13:15,133 "VELVET UNDERGROUND & NICO." 277 00:13:15,125 --> 00:13:17,125 AND ON THE COVER THERE'S A... 278 00:13:17,127 --> 00:13:21,567 "THE GREATEST POSTHUMOUSLY RELEASED SONG OF ALL TIME." 279 00:13:21,571 --> 00:13:25,111 EASY ONE. OTIS REDDING, "SITTING ON THE DOCK OF THE BAY." 280 00:13:25,105 --> 00:13:29,175 (rock music playing) 281 00:13:29,179 --> 00:13:31,179 (Jack) ♪ SARAH'S IN THE SUPERMARKET ♪ 282 00:13:31,181 --> 00:13:34,281 ♪ THINKING I LIKE HER A LOT ♪ 283 00:13:34,284 --> 00:13:36,194 ♪ EVEN IF I ONLY MET HER ♪ 284 00:13:36,186 --> 00:13:38,816 ♪ WOULD REALLY LIKE TO KNOW HER BETTER ♪ 285 00:13:38,818 --> 00:13:40,888 ♪ THINKING WE SHOULD GO ON A DATE ♪ 286 00:13:40,891 --> 00:13:43,191 ♪ SOMEWHERE NICE, SOMEWHERE GREAT ♪ 287 00:13:43,193 --> 00:13:45,533 ♪ PLEASE, SARAH, DON'T MAKE ME WAIT ♪ 288 00:13:45,525 --> 00:13:47,955 HA! ♪ HOW ABOUT DRINKS? ♪ 289 00:13:47,958 --> 00:13:51,258 (music stops) WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU ABOUT SKATING BACK HERE? 290 00:13:51,261 --> 00:13:54,061 SORRY, MOM. MY BAD. 291 00:13:55,966 --> 00:13:58,106 THE MEN IN YOUR LIFE. 292 00:13:58,108 --> 00:14:01,168 YEP. SO, JACK, STILL WANT TO GO ON THAT DATE? 293 00:14:01,171 --> 00:14:03,441 (Trevor sighs) 294 00:14:13,954 --> 00:14:15,264 I'M ON IT. 295 00:14:15,255 --> 00:14:18,455 (chuckles) I'M BALANCING. LOOK AT ME! 296 00:14:18,458 --> 00:14:21,258 I'M ON A SKATEBOARD! 297 00:14:21,261 --> 00:14:23,231 (whispers) IT'S NOT MOVING. 298 00:14:23,233 --> 00:14:26,043 IT WOULD HELP IF YOU PUSHED IT. 299 00:14:26,036 --> 00:14:27,566 YOUR FRIEND'S GOOD WITH KIDS. 300 00:14:27,567 --> 00:14:29,267 HOW ABOUT YOU, JACK? 301 00:14:29,269 --> 00:14:31,439 (doorbell rings) 302 00:14:31,441 --> 00:14:35,011 I TOLD SARAH I WAS OKAY WITH KIDS. 303 00:14:35,005 --> 00:14:37,175 I-I-I WAS ON AUTOPILOT. 304 00:14:37,177 --> 00:14:39,907 I WOULD'VE SAID I WAS INTO WICCA OR PILATES 305 00:14:39,910 --> 00:14:42,210 IF THAT'S WHAT SHE LIKED. 306 00:14:42,212 --> 00:14:44,212 HEY! 307 00:14:44,214 --> 00:14:46,264 LOOK AT THAT. YOU SHOWED. 308 00:14:46,256 --> 00:14:49,316 YOU KEEP COMING UP WITH NEW WAYS TO LOOK GREAT. 309 00:14:49,319 --> 00:14:51,319 IT IS UNCANNY. 310 00:14:51,321 --> 00:14:53,321 THERE'S THE SMOOTH TALK THAT MADE JACK KOZAKOWSKI 311 00:14:53,323 --> 00:14:56,333 NUMBER THREE IN THE MORNING. NUMBER TWO IN THE DEMOS, BABY. 312 00:14:56,326 --> 00:14:59,896 (smarmy voice) AND NUMBER ONE IN OUR HEARTS. 313 00:14:59,899 --> 00:15:01,369 (dogs howl and bark in distance) 314 00:15:01,371 --> 00:15:05,211 THANKS FOR BEING FREE ON SUCH SHORT NOTICE. 315 00:15:05,205 --> 00:15:08,205 MY USUAL SITTER WAS BUSY, BUT YOUR REFERENCES CHECKED OUT. 316 00:15:08,208 --> 00:15:10,378 SOUNDS LIKE A NICE GUY, THIS FELIX. 317 00:15:10,380 --> 00:15:12,940 HIS CHILDREN-- SUCH LITTLE PRINCES. 318 00:15:12,943 --> 00:15:16,253 (boy) I'M 13. I DON'T NEED A SITTER. MINE AREN'T. 319 00:15:16,246 --> 00:15:19,246 IT'S A WASTE OF MONEY! OKAY, GROUND RULES. 320 00:15:19,249 --> 00:15:22,149 BEN GOES TO BED AT 9:00, ADAM AT 10:00. 321 00:15:22,152 --> 00:15:25,132 THEY CAN WATCH TV, BUT BEN IS SCARED OF ANY SHOW 322 00:15:25,125 --> 00:15:27,425 INVOLVING GHOSTS OR FOR SOME REASON, SALESMEN. IT'S WEIRD. 323 00:15:27,427 --> 00:15:29,427 IF YOU HAVE ANY PROBLEMS, MY NEIGHBOR, MRS. TURNER, 324 00:15:29,429 --> 00:15:31,429 IS RIGHT NEXT DOOR, AND MY CELL 325 00:15:31,431 --> 00:15:34,061 AND ALL OTHER EMERGENCY NUMBERS ARE ON THE FRIDGE. GOT IT? 326 00:15:34,064 --> 00:15:36,074 BEN, 9:00, ADAM, 10:00, NO SALESMEN, 327 00:15:36,066 --> 00:15:38,266 MRS. TURNER NEXT DOOR, EMERGENCY NUMBER, FRIDGE. 328 00:15:38,268 --> 00:15:40,268 ALL RIGHT. GO WITH GOD. 329 00:15:40,270 --> 00:15:41,570 OKAY. HAVE FUN. 330 00:15:41,571 --> 00:15:43,371 OKAY. 331 00:15:43,373 --> 00:15:46,183 REMIND ME AGAIN--WHICH ONE OF YOU IS ADAM AND WHICH ONE'S BEN? 332 00:15:46,176 --> 00:15:50,376 KID "A," KID "B." GREAT. KID "A," GET YOUR LADIES ON THE LINE. 333 00:15:50,380 --> 00:15:53,080 TELL THEM TO RALLY OVER TO THE PARTY PIT. 334 00:15:53,083 --> 00:15:56,593 WE GOT A BOTTLE FOR SPINNING. WE KNOW HOW TO USE IT. 335 00:15:56,586 --> 00:15:59,586 KID "B," YOU CAN WATCH. OKAY, THAT WAS A JOKE. 336 00:15:59,589 --> 00:16:02,059 I'LL BE IN MY ROOM. 337 00:16:05,435 --> 00:16:07,695 WHAT ELSE YOU GOT? 338 00:16:12,202 --> 00:16:17,312 3 MONTHS ON THE OPEN ROAD IN A 1982 EUROVAN WITH NO A.C.? 339 00:16:17,307 --> 00:16:19,047 AND NO WORRIES. 340 00:16:19,049 --> 00:16:21,209 IT WAS THE BEST THREE MONTHS OF MY LIFE. 341 00:16:21,211 --> 00:16:23,211 AND HOW MANY DIFFERENT MUSIC FESTIVALS 342 00:16:23,213 --> 00:16:25,223 DID THE 20-YEAR-OLD YOU HIT? 343 00:16:25,215 --> 00:16:27,185 17. 18, ACTUALLY, IF YOU WANT TO INCLUDE 344 00:16:27,187 --> 00:16:29,157 AN IMPROMPTU UNCLE TUPELO SHOW 345 00:16:29,159 --> 00:16:32,519 THAT HAPPENED ON THE ROOF OF A CHURCH IN EAST ST. LOUIS. 346 00:16:32,522 --> 00:16:36,172 UM, OF COURSE, I DON'T REMEMBER THAT NIGHT, 347 00:16:36,166 --> 00:16:39,126 UM, BUT I'M TOLD IT WAS AWESOME. 348 00:16:39,129 --> 00:16:40,469 I'M SO JEALOUS. 349 00:16:40,470 --> 00:16:43,430 YOU KNOW, GETTING KNOCKED UP AT 19 PUT A SERIOUS CRIMP 350 00:16:43,433 --> 00:16:46,483 IN MY PARTYING EITHER WITH OR LIKE ROCK STARS. 351 00:16:46,476 --> 00:16:49,006 NEVER TOO OLD FOR AN ADVENTURE. 352 00:16:50,710 --> 00:16:54,440 WHAT'S THE WEATHER LIKE IN NEVERLAND, JACK? 353 00:16:54,444 --> 00:16:57,454 YOU KNOW, I ALWAYS THOUGHT IT WAS A WEE BIT SLEAZY 354 00:16:57,447 --> 00:17:00,587 WHEN I HEARD MARRIED MEN SAY THEY WERE HAPPY TO BE MARRIED, 355 00:17:00,590 --> 00:17:03,250 LIKE, 364 DAYS OUT OF THE YEAR, 356 00:17:03,253 --> 00:17:08,703 BUT THEY WISH THAT THEY COULD HAVE THAT 365th NIGHT OFF. 357 00:17:08,698 --> 00:17:11,298 BUT SOMETIMES? 358 00:17:11,301 --> 00:17:13,301 THAT'S HOW I FEEL ABOUT MOTHERHOOD. 359 00:17:13,303 --> 00:17:17,373 MY BOYS ARE MY FAVORITE PEOPLE ON THE PLANET, 360 00:17:17,367 --> 00:17:21,737 BUT, YEAH, ONE NIGHT A YEAR TO HAVE YOUR LIFE? 361 00:17:21,741 --> 00:17:23,511 I'D TAKE THAT. 362 00:17:25,275 --> 00:17:26,515 (applause) (man) WHOO! ALL RIGHT! 363 00:17:26,516 --> 00:17:29,616 (cheering) 364 00:17:29,619 --> 00:17:32,149 TELL ME THAT'S JUST SOME LONG-HAIRED FELLOW 365 00:17:32,152 --> 00:17:34,282 THAT HAPPENS TO BEAR A STRIKING RESEMBLANCE 366 00:17:34,284 --> 00:17:37,164 TO THE LEAD SINGER OF FUTURE CLOUDS AND RADAR. 367 00:17:37,157 --> 00:17:39,227 I CAN'T TELL YOU THAT. 368 00:17:39,229 --> 00:17:41,129 THANK YOU. 369 00:17:41,131 --> 00:17:42,761 MY NAME'S ROBERT HARRISON, 370 00:17:42,762 --> 00:17:45,772 AND I'D LIKE TO THANK AN OLD FRIEND OF MINE, JACK KOZAKOWSKI, 371 00:17:45,765 --> 00:17:47,465 FOR INVITING ME TO BE HERE TONIGHT. 372 00:17:47,467 --> 00:17:50,097 THIS ONE GOES OUT TO SARAH PORTER, 373 00:17:50,100 --> 00:17:52,640 WHO HAS EXCEPTIONAL TASTE. 374 00:17:52,642 --> 00:17:57,182 (playing "Build Havana") 375 00:17:57,177 --> 00:18:01,607 ♪ SHE GETS SO BROKEN UP ♪ 376 00:18:01,611 --> 00:18:04,651 ♪ SHE CAN'T MEND ♪ 377 00:18:07,086 --> 00:18:08,786 (making kissing noises) 378 00:18:08,788 --> 00:18:11,618 OH, I MIGHT BE A LITTLE FUZZY 379 00:18:11,621 --> 00:18:13,621 ON SECOND GRADER SOCIAL ETIQUETTE, 380 00:18:13,623 --> 00:18:15,603 BUT I'D EASE UP ON THE KISSY SOUNDS. 381 00:18:15,595 --> 00:18:19,225 IT SEEMS A LITTLE FORWARD. I WANT YOU TO HAVE MY BABIES. 382 00:18:19,229 --> 00:18:20,769 DUDE, WAY TOO FORWARD. (Adam) BEN! 383 00:18:20,770 --> 00:18:24,370 I WAS ON WITH VANESSA SALVATY. OKAY, GET OFF ME. GET OFF ME. 384 00:18:24,374 --> 00:18:26,684 FINE LINE BETWEEN ROUGHHOUSING AND CAIN AND ABEL. 385 00:18:26,676 --> 00:18:29,306 OW! GAME OVER. 386 00:18:29,309 --> 00:18:32,239 OH, GAME OVER. COME ON. (grunts) 387 00:18:32,242 --> 00:18:33,512 YOUR BROTHER... 388 00:18:33,513 --> 00:18:36,223 (sighs) 389 00:18:36,216 --> 00:18:37,616 I'M TELLING MOM. 390 00:18:37,617 --> 00:18:39,317 THAT'S GONNA BE HARD, 391 00:18:39,319 --> 00:18:41,789 SEEING HOW MOM'S NEVER COMING HOME. 392 00:18:44,354 --> 00:18:45,734 (door slams) 393 00:18:45,725 --> 00:18:48,455 (Ben crying) VERY CONSTRUCTIVE, ADAM. 394 00:18:48,458 --> 00:18:56,238 ♪ HOW THIS LITTLE APARTMENT ALWAYS STAYS SO COLD ♪ 395 00:18:58,208 --> 00:19:01,308 ♪ OUR LOVE'S IN CURRENCY ♪ 396 00:19:01,311 --> 00:19:05,451 ♪ THAT I CAN'T HOLD ♪ 397 00:19:07,617 --> 00:19:10,247 ♪ WE COULD BUILD ♪ 398 00:19:10,250 --> 00:19:14,220 ♪ WE COULD BUILD ♪ 399 00:19:14,224 --> 00:19:16,834 ♪ HAVANA ♪ 400 00:19:23,593 --> 00:19:27,243 (cell phone rings) 401 00:19:27,237 --> 00:19:30,237 (ring, beep) 402 00:19:30,240 --> 00:19:31,440 YES, TREVOR? 403 00:19:31,441 --> 00:19:33,901 Claire, I need your help. It's an emergency. 404 00:19:33,903 --> 00:19:37,353 YOUR PROBLEM, I'M QUITE SURE, CAN WAIT UNTIL OUR NEXT SESSION. 405 00:19:37,347 --> 00:19:39,677 Uh, no, it can't. I'm babysitting, 406 00:19:39,679 --> 00:19:41,579 and the 7-year-old locked himself in the bathroom. 407 00:19:41,581 --> 00:19:43,381 GIVE ME 30 MINUTES. 408 00:19:50,820 --> 00:19:53,820 I KNOW IT'S SCARY, BUT PART OF LIFE IS 409 00:19:53,823 --> 00:19:57,473 KNOWING THAT WHEN SOMEONE GOES OUT, THEY COME BACK. I TRIED THE "THEY COME BACK" ROUTE. 410 00:19:57,467 --> 00:20:00,227 I TRIED THE "DON'T GIVE YOUR BROTHER THE SATISFACTION" ROUTE. 411 00:20:00,230 --> 00:20:02,300 I TRIED THE "YOU'RE GONNA GET YOUR BABYSITTER 412 00:20:02,302 --> 00:20:04,732 IN TROUBLE WITH YOUR MOM" ROUTE. SHH! 413 00:20:04,734 --> 00:20:08,244 JUST BECAUSE YOUR MOM WENT OUT TO DINNER OR A MOVIE 414 00:20:08,238 --> 00:20:11,408 DOESN'T MEAN SHE'S GONE GONE. 415 00:20:11,411 --> 00:20:13,411 BEN, WOULD YOU LIKE TO UNLOCK THE DOOR 416 00:20:13,413 --> 00:20:16,323 AND COME OUT AND TALK TO ME? (Ben) NO! 417 00:20:16,316 --> 00:20:19,516 MAYBE YOU COULD UNLOCK THE DOOR AND LET ME IN? 418 00:20:21,591 --> 00:20:23,291 (door unlocks, door opens) 419 00:20:26,596 --> 00:20:29,426 YOU DIDN'T EVEN HAVE TO SHOW HIM YOUR DEGREES. 420 00:20:29,429 --> 00:20:31,799 I REALLY WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN. 421 00:20:31,801 --> 00:20:35,231 JACK, THIS WAS A PRETTY GREAT-- AN AMAZING NIGHT, ACTUALLY, 422 00:20:35,234 --> 00:20:38,574 BUT I CAN'T DO THIS ON A REGULAR BASIS. 423 00:20:38,568 --> 00:20:40,808 THAT'S OKAY. I HAVE A LIMITED ROSTER 424 00:20:40,810 --> 00:20:43,810 OF INDIE ROCK LEGENDS THAT I CAN PULL FAVORS FROM. 425 00:20:43,813 --> 00:20:46,283 (chuckles) I'M A MOM. 426 00:20:46,276 --> 00:20:49,276 I DON'T GO OUT, EXCEPT TO PICK UP MY KIDS FROM KARATE 427 00:20:49,279 --> 00:20:50,949 OR GUITAR LESSONS. 428 00:20:50,950 --> 00:20:54,920 WE EAT MEALS IN, I HELP THEM WITH THEIR HOMEWORK. 429 00:20:54,924 --> 00:20:57,394 THAT'S NOT A LIFE I WISH ON ANY SINGLE MAN, 430 00:20:57,387 --> 00:21:00,427 LET ALONE ONE WHO SAYS THE BEST THREE MONTHS OF HIS LIFE 431 00:21:00,430 --> 00:21:02,630 WAS AN 18-FESTIVAL ROAD TRIP. 432 00:21:02,632 --> 00:21:04,332 THE BEST THREE MONTHS. 433 00:21:04,334 --> 00:21:07,574 BUT THAT ROAD TRIP WAS FOUR MONTHS LONG. 434 00:21:07,567 --> 00:21:09,797 WHAT I REALLY WANT 435 00:21:09,799 --> 00:21:12,569 IS JUST TO SEE YOU AS MUCH AS I-- 436 00:21:12,572 --> 00:21:14,602 AS MUCH AS I POSSIBLY CAN. 437 00:21:23,453 --> 00:21:25,323 MM. 438 00:21:26,816 --> 00:21:28,316 WELL, BRACE YOURSELF. 439 00:21:28,318 --> 00:21:32,358 WHAT WE FIND INSIDE MIGHT NOT BE PRETTY. 440 00:21:33,763 --> 00:21:36,473 (Sarah) HEY, GUYS. HEY, TREVOR. 441 00:21:36,466 --> 00:21:38,526 HI, STRANGER. HOW WAS YOUR NIGHT? 442 00:21:38,528 --> 00:21:40,398 YOU CAME HOME! 443 00:21:40,400 --> 00:21:43,730 YOU CAME HOME. ADAM SAID YOU WERE NEVER COMING HOME. (Sarah) ADAM. 444 00:21:43,733 --> 00:21:46,943 GOD, YOU'RE SUCH A BABY. THIN ICE, ADAM MILES PORTER. 445 00:21:46,936 --> 00:21:48,936 OF COURSE YOU TAKE HIS SIDE. (drops controller) 446 00:21:51,811 --> 00:21:53,811 (door slams) 447 00:21:53,813 --> 00:21:55,823 MY BABYSITTER CALLED IN A PSYCHIATRIST? 448 00:21:55,815 --> 00:21:57,815 TREVOR DIDN'T WANT TO RUIN YOUR DATE. 449 00:21:57,817 --> 00:21:59,817 BEN LOCKED HIMSELF IN THE BATHROOM, 450 00:21:59,819 --> 00:22:01,889 AND IT SEEMS HE-- HE WET HIMSELF. 451 00:22:01,891 --> 00:22:04,891 YES. OH. I THOUGHT WE WERE PAST THIS. 452 00:22:04,894 --> 00:22:06,464 THE SCHOOL PSYCHIATRIST-- 453 00:22:06,456 --> 00:22:09,396 HE SAYS IT'S LINKED TO THEIR DAD'S ABSENCE. MM-HMM. 454 00:22:09,399 --> 00:22:11,399 HE'D VISIT THE BOYS FOR YEARS AFTER WE LEFT, 455 00:22:11,401 --> 00:22:14,401 BUT WHEN HE STARTED A NEW FAMILY A YEAR AGO, THE VISITS STOPPED. 456 00:22:14,404 --> 00:22:16,414 FEARS OF ABANDONMENT CAN BE VERY REAL 457 00:22:16,406 --> 00:22:18,406 IN THE AFTERMATH OF A DIVORCE. 458 00:22:18,408 --> 00:22:20,408 YEAH. I'M LIVING WITH A DOUBLE DOSE OF IT. 459 00:22:20,410 --> 00:22:22,740 ADAM BURIES IT IN HIS COOL FACADE, 460 00:22:22,742 --> 00:22:25,452 AND BEN WEARS IT ON HIS SLEEVE. 461 00:22:26,946 --> 00:22:30,376 SO? HOW WAS IT? HOW WAS WHAT? 462 00:22:30,380 --> 00:22:32,480 THE MOVIE "HERBIE GOES BANANAS." 463 00:22:32,482 --> 00:22:34,952 THE DATE. HOW WAS THE DATE? 464 00:22:34,954 --> 00:22:37,494 THE DATE WAS AMAZING, BUT... 465 00:22:37,487 --> 00:22:39,787 I DON'T KNOW. I THINK IT JUST SUNK IN, 466 00:22:39,789 --> 00:22:42,429 YOU KNOW, WHAT THE-- WHAT THE KIDS THING MEANS. 467 00:22:42,432 --> 00:22:44,992 I'M JUST-- I'M--I'M NOT SURE I CAN RELATE. 468 00:22:44,994 --> 00:22:47,874 I GOT SOMETHING TO SHOW YOU. 469 00:22:49,769 --> 00:22:53,099 THIS IS THE ROOM I GREW UP IN. 470 00:22:53,102 --> 00:22:56,112 A ROCK 'N' ROLL SHRINE. IF YOU CAN'T RELATE TO THESE BOYS, 471 00:22:56,105 --> 00:22:58,775 YOU'RE NOT TRYING HARD ENOUGH. 472 00:22:58,778 --> 00:23:01,678 JACK KOZAKOWSKI. 473 00:23:01,681 --> 00:23:03,711 IN THE FLESH. 474 00:23:03,713 --> 00:23:06,493 I LISTEN TO YOUR SHOW. 475 00:23:06,486 --> 00:23:08,916 OH, HEY, I-I-I APPRECIATE THAT. UM... 476 00:23:08,918 --> 00:23:11,688 KID "A." 477 00:23:11,691 --> 00:23:14,161 IT USED TO BE REALLY GOOD. 478 00:23:14,163 --> 00:23:16,933 BUT NOW... IT SUCKS. 479 00:23:16,926 --> 00:23:19,166 ♪♪ 480 00:23:19,168 --> 00:23:21,398 THANKS FOR THE FEEDBACK. 481 00:23:21,400 --> 00:23:24,400 IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT YOU CAN'T PLAY WHAT YOU WANT. 482 00:23:24,403 --> 00:23:27,413 WHY DO YOU EVEN STILL WANT TO WORK THERE? 483 00:23:27,406 --> 00:23:30,776 WELL, LET'S SEE, UH, IT KEEPS ME OFF THE STREETS, 484 00:23:30,780 --> 00:23:33,710 UH, YOU KNOW, PAYS THE RENT, 485 00:23:33,713 --> 00:23:36,623 FEEDS INTO MY, UH, GENERAL MASOCHISM. 486 00:23:36,616 --> 00:23:39,116 YEAH, THE MONEY. I-I GET IT. 487 00:23:39,118 --> 00:23:41,118 (laughs) WELL, HOW QUICKLY ONE MOVES 488 00:23:41,120 --> 00:23:45,050 FROM, UH, CULT ICON TO SELLOUT. 489 00:23:45,054 --> 00:23:51,704 ♪♪ 490 00:23:51,701 --> 00:23:53,561 (knock on door) 491 00:23:53,563 --> 00:23:55,203 WE DID IT. 492 00:23:55,204 --> 00:23:58,114 200 SINGLES HAVE FILLED OUT OUR ONLINE QUESTIONNAIRE-- 493 00:23:58,107 --> 00:24:00,507 AN EQUAL MIX OF YOUR SINGLES' GROUP, 494 00:24:00,510 --> 00:24:02,510 KELSEY STANZLER'S LOYAL READERS 495 00:24:02,512 --> 00:24:04,742 AND FRIENDS OF THE DATEWELL CORPORATE STAFF. 496 00:24:04,744 --> 00:24:08,154 SO IT'S GO TIME, HUH? LOOKS LIKE IT. 497 00:24:08,147 --> 00:24:10,817 ARE YOU REALLY INTO TAMARA DE LEMPICKA, 498 00:24:10,820 --> 00:24:14,020 OR IS THIS, LIKE, A CHRISTMAS GIFT FROM A PATIENT? 499 00:24:14,023 --> 00:24:17,093 I'M A BIG FAN, PRETTY MUCH OF ALL THINGS ART DECO. 500 00:24:17,086 --> 00:24:18,826 ME, TOO. 501 00:24:18,828 --> 00:24:20,828 (chuckles) I'M ACTUALLY A MEMBER 502 00:24:20,830 --> 00:24:23,530 OF THE ART DECO SOCIETY OF NEW YORK. 503 00:24:23,533 --> 00:24:26,143 NOT THAT I GO TO THE MEETINGS OR ANYTHING. 504 00:24:26,135 --> 00:24:27,995 I JUST LIKE-- GETTING THE NEWSLETTER? 505 00:24:27,997 --> 00:24:29,637 YEAH. 506 00:24:29,639 --> 00:24:32,639 SO YOU KNOW WHEN THEY'RE DOING THE GUIDED TOURS AND ALL THAT. 507 00:24:32,642 --> 00:24:35,612 OKAY, THANK YOU FOR MAKING ME FEEL LIKE LESS OF A DORK. 508 00:24:35,605 --> 00:24:37,945 WELL, WE ARE TOTAL DORKS. 509 00:24:37,947 --> 00:24:40,947 SO I GUESS WE SHOULD GET THIS THING GOING, HUH? YEAH. 510 00:24:40,950 --> 00:24:43,950 YEAH, CAN'T WAIT TO SEE WHO IT SPITS OUT FOR ME. 511 00:24:43,953 --> 00:24:46,523 YOU FILLED OUT A QUESTIONNAIRE? 512 00:24:46,516 --> 00:24:48,786 A CHEF HAS TO TASTE HIS OWN FOOD, RIGHT? 513 00:24:48,788 --> 00:24:51,488 UM, MAYBE YOU SHOULD TRY IT. 514 00:24:51,490 --> 00:24:53,920 OH, I'M NOT SURE THAT WOULD BE APPROPRIATE. 515 00:24:53,923 --> 00:24:56,073 UH, USE A PSEUDONYM. NO ONE WILL KNOW. 516 00:24:56,065 --> 00:24:58,225 UH, SEE WHAT IT TURNS UP. 517 00:24:58,227 --> 00:25:01,797 WE SURE HAVE A LOT IN COMMON. 518 00:25:06,105 --> 00:25:08,905 GOT A CALL AT WORK TODAY. 519 00:25:08,908 --> 00:25:11,208 WAIT. GIVE ME TEN SECONDS OF AFFIRMATION 520 00:25:11,210 --> 00:25:14,540 SO I KNOW THAT MY LIFE IS NOT A LIE. 521 00:25:14,544 --> 00:25:16,854 DID YOU LIKE DINNER? I LOVED THE MEAL-- 522 00:25:16,846 --> 00:25:19,846 SO MUCH SO, IN FACT, THAT NOW I WANT TO CELEBRATE. 523 00:25:19,849 --> 00:25:22,849 REMEMBER WHEN YOU SAID THAT YOU WANTED TO BE ME 524 00:25:22,852 --> 00:25:25,662 ONE NIGHT OF THE YEAR? (clenched teeth) NOT IN FRONT OF THE PROGENY. 525 00:25:25,655 --> 00:25:28,725 ELVIS COSTELLO IS TAPING A LIVE PERFORMANCE 526 00:25:28,728 --> 00:25:32,098 AT THE BOWERY IN 90 MINUTES, 527 00:25:32,101 --> 00:25:35,101 AND WE--YOU AND I--ARE 2 OF THE 30 PEOPLE ON THE LIST. 528 00:25:35,104 --> 00:25:37,244 TREVOR'S STANDING BY. 529 00:25:37,236 --> 00:25:39,166 WHAT DO YOU SAY? 530 00:25:39,168 --> 00:25:40,868 YOU GO. 531 00:25:40,870 --> 00:25:42,870 HERE AT THE PORTER HOUSE, 532 00:25:42,872 --> 00:25:45,882 WE START OUR SCIENCE FAIR PROJECT TONIGHT. 533 00:25:45,875 --> 00:25:48,215 (The Rite Flyers' "Suffer Fools Gladly" playing) 534 00:25:48,217 --> 00:25:49,917 ♪ SHE DON'T SUFFER ♪ 535 00:25:49,919 --> 00:25:51,219 ♪ SHE DON'T, DON'T SUFFER ♪ 536 00:25:51,220 --> 00:25:53,920 ♪ SHE DON'T SUFFER FOOLS, SUFFER FOOLS ♪ 537 00:25:53,923 --> 00:25:58,733 ♪ SUFFER FOOLS GLADLY ♪ 538 00:25:58,728 --> 00:26:02,988 ♪ SUFFER FOOLS GLADLY ♪ 539 00:26:02,992 --> 00:26:05,802 ♪♪ 540 00:26:05,795 --> 00:26:08,295 ♪ SHE DON'T SUFFER, SHE DON'T, DON'T SUFFER ♪ 541 00:26:08,297 --> 00:26:11,297 ♪ SHE DON'T SUFFER FOOLS, SUFFER FOOLS ♪ 542 00:26:11,300 --> 00:26:15,610 ♪ SUFFER FOOLS GLADLY ♪ 543 00:26:15,605 --> 00:26:18,705 ♪ SUFFER FOOLS GLADLY ♪ 544 00:26:18,708 --> 00:26:21,748 SO YOUR--YOUR NEW SINGLE IS CALLED... 545 00:26:21,751 --> 00:26:23,211 "R.O.F.L"? 546 00:26:23,212 --> 00:26:25,962 YEAH. I WANTED TO DO AN ALBUM THAT REFLECTS ME, 547 00:26:25,955 --> 00:26:28,785 NOT THAT THE LAST ONE DIDN'T-- IT WAS ME. 548 00:26:28,788 --> 00:26:31,218 IT WAS A... DIFFERENT ME, YOU KNOW? 549 00:26:31,220 --> 00:26:33,660 UM, I THINK WHAT I'M TRYING TO SAY IS, 550 00:26:33,663 --> 00:26:35,803 THIS ALBUM REALLY REFLECTS THE NEW ME, YOU KNOW? 551 00:26:35,795 --> 00:26:38,995 LIKE, THE "NOW" ME, EVEN THOUGH I RECORDED IT SIX MONTHS AGO. 552 00:26:38,998 --> 00:26:40,328 ♪ SHE DON'T SUFFER ♪ 553 00:26:40,329 --> 00:26:42,029 ♪ SHE DON'T, DON'T SUFFER ♪ 554 00:26:42,031 --> 00:26:44,871 ♪ SHE DON'T SUFFER FOOLS, SUFFER FOOLS ♪ 555 00:26:44,874 --> 00:26:48,144 ♪ SUFFER FOOLS GLADLY ♪ 556 00:26:49,779 --> 00:26:53,879 ♪ SUFFER FOOLS GLADLY ♪ 557 00:26:53,883 --> 00:26:57,893 ♪ SHE DON'T, SHE DON'T SUFFER ♪ (mouths words) 558 00:26:57,887 --> 00:26:59,387 ♪ SHE DON'T, DON'T SUFFER ♪ 559 00:26:59,388 --> 00:27:04,388 ♪ SHE DON'T SUFFER, SHE DON'T, DON'T SUFFER ♪ 560 00:27:04,393 --> 00:27:07,363 ♪ SHE DON'T SUFFER, SHE DON'T, DON'T SUFFER ♪ 561 00:27:07,356 --> 00:27:09,026 (mouths words) 562 00:27:09,028 --> 00:27:12,758 ♪♪ 563 00:27:12,762 --> 00:27:14,262 (speaks inaudibly) 564 00:27:16,666 --> 00:27:19,766 CLIFFORD AND I USED TO WORK TOGETHER 565 00:27:19,769 --> 00:27:22,039 WAY BACK AT A STATION IN FLAGSTAFF 566 00:27:22,041 --> 00:27:23,341 THAT NO LONGER EXISTS. 567 00:27:23,342 --> 00:27:26,222 NOW HE'S RUNNING A STATION IN SEATTLE, 568 00:27:26,215 --> 00:27:29,415 SAYS THERE'S A JOB THERE FOR ME. IN SEATTLE? 569 00:27:29,418 --> 00:27:33,178 I MEAN, YOU KNOW, WHAT I AM DOING HERE, TREVOR, IN NEW YORK 570 00:27:33,182 --> 00:27:34,752 IS KILLING ME. 571 00:27:34,754 --> 00:27:37,734 OUT IN SEATTLE, I GET TO PLAY WHAT I WANT. 572 00:27:37,727 --> 00:27:39,857 IT'S A DRIVE-TIME SLOT. IT'S THE PERFECT JOB. 573 00:27:39,859 --> 00:27:43,189 EXCEPT IT'S IN SEATTLE, WHICH IS WHY YOU PASSED. 574 00:27:43,192 --> 00:27:46,142 I SAID I'D TAKE A FEW HOURS TO THINK ABOUT IT. 575 00:27:46,135 --> 00:27:48,735 LOOK, MAYBE I CAN TAKE THE JOB, YOU KNOW, 576 00:27:48,738 --> 00:27:50,738 UH, KEEP THINGS GOING WITH SARAH, 577 00:27:50,740 --> 00:27:54,070 AND THEN WHEN WE'RE READY, I'D ASK HER AND THE KIDS 578 00:27:54,073 --> 00:27:57,413 TO MOVE OUT THERE WITH ME. SERIOUSLY, IS THIS YOUR FIRST DAY? 579 00:27:57,406 --> 00:28:00,406 SARAH'S LIFE, HER BOYS' LIVES-- 580 00:28:00,409 --> 00:28:02,409 THEY'RE HERE IN NEW YORK. 581 00:28:02,411 --> 00:28:06,691 SHE'S NOT GONNA WANT TO UPROOT AND MOVE TO WEST RAINS-ALL-YEAR 582 00:28:06,685 --> 00:28:08,685 WHERE THEY DON'T KNOW ANYBODY. 583 00:28:08,687 --> 00:28:11,017 SHE WANTS SOMEBODY TO DIG INTO THE GROUND 584 00:28:11,020 --> 00:28:13,990 RIGHT NEXT TO HER AND SETTLE IN. 585 00:28:13,993 --> 00:28:16,303 THAT'S HOW YOU MAKE THIS WORK. 586 00:28:25,975 --> 00:28:27,335 (doorbell rings) 587 00:28:27,336 --> 00:28:29,276 HEY. 588 00:28:29,278 --> 00:28:30,808 HEY. 589 00:28:33,282 --> 00:28:35,042 HEY, GUYS. 590 00:28:35,044 --> 00:28:36,224 HEY. HEY. 591 00:28:36,215 --> 00:28:39,045 YOU'RE RUNNING A BIT LATE TODAY, HUH? 592 00:28:39,048 --> 00:28:42,848 I DIDN'T REALIZE I WAS ON A SCHEDULE. YOU'RE NOT. DID YOU EAT? 593 00:28:42,852 --> 00:28:45,152 SORRY. I--NO, I HAVEN'T. 594 00:28:45,154 --> 00:28:47,834 WHY DON'T YOU TAKE A LOAD OFF, RELAX? 595 00:28:47,827 --> 00:28:48,827 ♪♪ 596 00:28:48,828 --> 00:28:50,328 (turns up volume) 597 00:28:50,329 --> 00:28:52,429 (man) ♪ ...OF THE HAND OF YOUR HEART AND SOUL ♪ 598 00:28:52,431 --> 00:28:55,301 ♪ AND I CAN SAY BEFORE WE GET OLD ♪ 599 00:28:55,304 --> 00:28:57,074 HEY, JACK? 600 00:28:57,066 --> 00:28:58,836 YES, KID "A"? 601 00:28:58,838 --> 00:29:01,168 WE HAVE CAREER DAY AT SCHOOL TOMORROW. 602 00:29:01,170 --> 00:29:03,270 YOU MIND SHOWING UP, 603 00:29:03,272 --> 00:29:06,852 OUT-COOLING ALL THE LAWYER DADS? 604 00:29:06,846 --> 00:29:08,416 ♪ WONDERFUL, WONDERFUL WORLD ♪ 605 00:29:08,417 --> 00:29:09,477 (sighs) 606 00:29:09,478 --> 00:29:11,478 DON'T GET ALL WEIRD ABOUT IT. 607 00:29:11,480 --> 00:29:13,980 WE WON'T START THROWING A FOOTBALL AROUND. 608 00:29:13,983 --> 00:29:16,763 NO SEX TALKS... UNLESS YOU NEED ONE. 609 00:29:16,755 --> 00:29:19,485 (chuckles) 610 00:29:19,488 --> 00:29:21,488 NOW JUST SO I'M CLEAR, 611 00:29:21,490 --> 00:29:24,190 I'M NOT GONNA BE RUBBING YOUR HEAD AND SAYING, 612 00:29:24,193 --> 00:29:25,803 "ATTABOY, CHAMP." 613 00:29:25,795 --> 00:29:28,035 YEAH, YOU GET THE PICTURE. 614 00:29:28,037 --> 00:29:29,367 ALL RIGHT, I'M IN. 615 00:29:29,368 --> 00:29:31,038 PERFECT. 616 00:29:31,040 --> 00:29:33,370 GREAT. BOBBY RONSON AND SOME OF THOSE GUYS 617 00:29:33,372 --> 00:29:35,372 DON'T BELIEVE I KNOW YOU. 618 00:29:35,374 --> 00:29:37,354 HMM. 619 00:29:37,346 --> 00:29:39,446 ♪ WELL, I'M STILL TIRED ♪ 620 00:29:39,448 --> 00:29:41,948 OH, HEY, THAT'S GREAT. 621 00:29:41,951 --> 00:29:43,951 AHEM. 622 00:29:43,953 --> 00:29:45,153 MMM. 623 00:29:45,154 --> 00:29:49,194 EVERYTHING OKAY? 624 00:29:49,188 --> 00:29:51,018 YEAH. 625 00:29:51,020 --> 00:29:52,390 YEAH, EVERYTHING'S FINE. 626 00:29:52,391 --> 00:29:55,291 (cell phone rings) MM. 627 00:29:55,294 --> 00:29:58,274 ♪ YEAH, I CAN SAY IT'S A WONDERFUL, WONDERFUL... ♪ 628 00:29:58,267 --> 00:29:59,967 (clicks tongue and groans) 629 00:29:59,969 --> 00:30:02,269 WHO CALLED? 630 00:30:02,271 --> 00:30:04,971 IT'S NOBODY IMPORTANT. 631 00:30:04,974 --> 00:30:10,444 ♪ WONDERFUL, WONDERFUL, WONDERFUL, WONDERFUL WORLD ♪ 632 00:30:12,541 --> 00:30:15,441 (knock on door) 633 00:30:15,444 --> 00:30:17,194 JACK. 634 00:30:17,186 --> 00:30:20,246 I WAS UP ALL NIGHT, WORRIED ABOUT WHAT YOU WERE GONNA DO. 635 00:30:20,249 --> 00:30:22,249 I TRIED CALLING YOU. YOU DID? 636 00:30:22,251 --> 00:30:24,991 ENOUGH TIMES THAT I MADE MYSELF FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE. 637 00:30:24,994 --> 00:30:27,564 I ATE AN ENTIRE POUND CAKE. I'M STAYING, I'M STAYING. 638 00:30:27,556 --> 00:30:30,896 I GOT THREE PRETTY GOOD REASONS TO STAY IN NEW YORK. EXCELLENT CHOICE. 639 00:30:30,900 --> 00:30:33,130 HEY, YOU GOT THE AFTERNOON FREE? 640 00:30:33,132 --> 00:30:35,942 YOU WANNA ROADIE FOR LEGENDARY DEEJAY JACK KOZAKOWSKI? 641 00:30:35,935 --> 00:30:38,335 I'M SPEAKING OVER AT KID A's CLASS IN QUEENS. 642 00:30:38,337 --> 00:30:40,837 I COULD USE SOME HELP HAULING OVER SOME RECORDS. 643 00:30:40,839 --> 00:30:43,269 I'M ALMOST READY. WHAT TIME ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO BE THERE? 644 00:30:43,272 --> 00:30:47,122 1:30. 1:30. 1:30? JACK, THAT'S AN HOUR FROM NOW, IN QUEENS. 645 00:30:47,116 --> 00:30:49,946 SOUNDING VERY WIFE-LIKE THERE, TREVOR. 646 00:30:49,949 --> 00:30:51,949 VERY UN-ROCK 'N' ROLL. 647 00:30:51,951 --> 00:30:54,921 OKAY, I HAVE 20 MINUTES IN FRONT OF THIS CLASS. 648 00:30:54,924 --> 00:30:56,934 I CAN GIVE 'EM AN EDUCATION. 649 00:30:56,926 --> 00:30:59,256 I COULD SET THESE KIDS ON THE RIGHT PATH. 650 00:30:59,258 --> 00:31:02,458 I CAN, YOU KNOW, SPIN SOME STUFF THAT THEY DON'T KNOW 651 00:31:02,461 --> 00:31:05,031 BUT STUFF THAT THEY'D MOSTLY LIKE. I THINK THEY'D MOSTLY LIKE IF YOU WERE ON TIME. 652 00:31:05,034 --> 00:31:07,004 OH, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, IN A MINUTE. 653 00:31:06,996 --> 00:31:08,996 OKAY, WE'RE GONNA START OFF 654 00:31:08,998 --> 00:31:10,998 WITH GRANDMASTER FLASH'S "WHITE LINES." 655 00:31:11,000 --> 00:31:13,000 WE'LL DO, UH, YOU KNOW, A PUBLIC SERVICE, 656 00:31:13,002 --> 00:31:16,012 ANTI-DRUG KIND OF THING. THE TEACHER'S GONNA LOVE THAT. 657 00:31:16,005 --> 00:31:19,175 OKAY, GREAT, AND OFF TO QUEENS WE MERRILY GO. AND THEN SABBATH'S "WAR PIGS" 658 00:31:19,178 --> 00:31:21,478 AS A SHOUT-OUT TO THE SEVENTH GRADE METALHEADS, 659 00:31:21,480 --> 00:31:23,480 FOR THEY, TOO, ARE OUR FUTURE. 660 00:31:23,482 --> 00:31:26,062 AND THEN MAYBE... 661 00:31:26,055 --> 00:31:27,485 RASPBERRIES. 662 00:31:27,486 --> 00:31:30,316 YEAH, DELVE INTO THE JOYS OF POWER POP. 663 00:31:32,661 --> 00:31:35,021 (indistinct conversations) 664 00:31:35,024 --> 00:31:37,274 IT'S 1:25. I SHOULD'VE TAKEN MY CAR. 665 00:31:37,266 --> 00:31:39,566 NO. WELL, MAYBE WE SHOULD'VE SPENT LESS TIME 666 00:31:39,568 --> 00:31:41,568 ON THE "JOYS OF POWER POP" 667 00:31:41,570 --> 00:31:45,000 AND MORE TIME ON THE A-B-C's OF NOT LETTING KIDS DOWN. 668 00:31:45,004 --> 00:31:47,444 (beeps) (man) THE TRAIN SHOULD BE MOVING SHORTLY. 669 00:31:47,436 --> 00:31:50,336 THE MTA APOLOGIZES FOR THE DELAY. 670 00:31:57,016 --> 00:31:59,416 IT'S--NO SERVICE. 671 00:31:59,418 --> 00:32:00,988 NO SERVICE. 672 00:32:02,992 --> 00:32:05,422 YEAH, I THINK IT'S SAFE TO SAY WE MISSED IT. 673 00:32:05,424 --> 00:32:08,434 YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO MAKE THIS UP TO KID "A" 674 00:32:08,427 --> 00:32:10,497 IN A PRETTY BIG WAY. I KNOW. 675 00:32:10,499 --> 00:32:13,499 I SUSPECT HIS MOTHER'S GONNA BE AN EVEN TOUGHER SELL. 676 00:32:16,405 --> 00:32:18,505 HEY, WHY DON'T YOU TRY HER AGAIN? 677 00:32:18,507 --> 00:32:21,637 I TRIED HER, LIKE, TEN TIMES, OKAY? 678 00:32:21,640 --> 00:32:24,440 SHE'S MADE THE DECISION NOT TO ANSWER. 679 00:32:24,443 --> 00:32:26,683 TRY HER AGAIN. 680 00:32:26,675 --> 00:32:28,375 (sighs) 681 00:32:31,480 --> 00:32:34,020 (beep, speed dialing) 682 00:32:34,023 --> 00:32:36,663 (cell phone rings) 683 00:32:36,655 --> 00:32:39,455 (ring) 684 00:32:39,458 --> 00:32:41,028 (ring) 685 00:32:47,136 --> 00:32:49,036 (shuts cell phone) 686 00:32:49,038 --> 00:32:52,038 I HAVE BEEN STANDING OUT HERE FOR A WHILE. 687 00:32:52,041 --> 00:32:56,411 UH, HAND RAISED TO KNOCK, UNABLE TO KNOCK... 688 00:32:56,405 --> 00:32:58,405 HMM. 689 00:33:00,549 --> 00:33:02,379 OH, YEAH, I SH-- 690 00:33:02,381 --> 00:33:05,281 I SHOULD PROBABLY LET YOU GUYS MAKE UP. 691 00:33:14,693 --> 00:33:19,503 I AM REALLY, REALLY, REALLY SORRY. 692 00:33:19,498 --> 00:33:21,168 I DON'T CARE. 693 00:33:21,170 --> 00:33:24,130 YOU TALK FOR A LIVING. YOU'RE GOOD AT IT. 694 00:33:24,133 --> 00:33:27,213 MY KIDS--THEY DON'T NEED ANY MORE TALK. 695 00:33:27,206 --> 00:33:30,206 WE'VE HAD OUR QUOTA FILLED WITH MEN WHO DISAPPOINT. 696 00:33:30,209 --> 00:33:32,509 WE NEED A MAN WHO SHOWS UP. 697 00:33:32,511 --> 00:33:35,411 YOU'D BE AMAZED HOW HARD IT IS TO FIND THAT. 698 00:33:35,414 --> 00:33:39,354 YEAH, BUT, SARAH, I'M NOT ONE OF THOSE MEN WHO LET YOU DOWN. 699 00:33:39,348 --> 00:33:40,788 I--MAYBE I WAS. 700 00:33:40,789 --> 00:33:43,789 I ADMIT, I WAS NOT LOOKING TO SETTLE DOWN. 701 00:33:43,792 --> 00:33:45,492 I-I DIDN'T WANT TO. 702 00:33:45,494 --> 00:33:49,234 I JUST HAD THIS IDEA IN MY MIND THAT YOU WERE THE SAME AS ME. 703 00:33:49,228 --> 00:33:52,528 YOU WERE A FELLOW ROCK 'N' ROLL NOMAD. IS THIS MEANT TO COMFORT ME? 704 00:33:52,531 --> 00:33:54,531 NOW I JUST SIT IN MY BOOTH, 705 00:33:54,533 --> 00:33:57,513 WANTING TO GET HOME FOR PIZZA NIGHT, 706 00:33:57,506 --> 00:34:01,406 WONDERING HOW BEN DID ON A SPELLING TEST, UH... 707 00:34:01,410 --> 00:34:03,570 TRYING TO GET A SMILE OUT OF ADAM. 708 00:34:03,572 --> 00:34:08,422 WHEN I THINK OF HOME, I-I THINK OF WHERE YOU AND THE BOYS ARE. 709 00:34:08,417 --> 00:34:11,247 I WAS NEVER INTERESTED IN ANY OF THIS, 710 00:34:11,250 --> 00:34:15,080 BUT THEN YOU HAD TO GO MAKE ME FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU. 711 00:34:15,084 --> 00:34:18,064 WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY? 712 00:34:18,056 --> 00:34:20,456 DON'T MAKE ME REPEAT THE CHORUS. 713 00:34:23,392 --> 00:34:26,472 THE BOYS ARE AT KARATE. 714 00:34:26,465 --> 00:34:30,295 AND THEN THEIR FRIEND MILO'S MOM IS PICKING THEM UP 715 00:34:30,299 --> 00:34:31,599 FOR A SLEEPOVER. 716 00:34:31,600 --> 00:34:33,600 WELL, IT SEEMS LIKE THE PERFECT TIME 717 00:34:33,602 --> 00:34:36,352 TO PUT ON "ASTRAL WEEKS." 718 00:34:36,345 --> 00:34:37,805 (chuckles) 719 00:34:46,415 --> 00:34:47,715 (telephone rings) 720 00:34:47,716 --> 00:34:49,716 (Sarah) YOU'VE REACHED THE PORTERS'. 721 00:34:49,718 --> 00:34:51,418 LEAVE A MESSAGE. (beep) 722 00:34:51,420 --> 00:34:54,420 (man) Jack, it's Cliffy. Whose place am I calling? 723 00:34:54,423 --> 00:34:56,433 Is it true? Are you domesticated? 724 00:34:56,425 --> 00:34:59,425 That's too bad, because I've got the best job in America 725 00:34:59,428 --> 00:35:01,428 waiting for you in Seattle. 726 00:35:01,430 --> 00:35:03,730 You've asked for more time to consider the offer. 727 00:35:03,732 --> 00:35:06,742 I've given you more time. Quit keeping me hanging, buddy. 728 00:35:06,735 --> 00:35:09,735 You and I know there's no way you'll ever be happy 729 00:35:09,738 --> 00:35:13,178 playing that Top 40 crap. (beep) 730 00:35:15,684 --> 00:35:18,394 ♪♪ 731 00:35:18,387 --> 00:35:20,447 HEY. HEY. 732 00:35:20,449 --> 00:35:23,519 SO... THAT GUY FROM THE RADIO STATION? 733 00:35:23,522 --> 00:35:25,552 JACK? 734 00:35:25,554 --> 00:35:28,664 YEAH, IF HE PASSES OUT IN HIS OWN SICK, 735 00:35:28,657 --> 00:35:30,357 YOU'RE CLEANING UP. 736 00:35:34,403 --> 00:35:37,173 JACK, WHAT HAPPENED? 737 00:35:37,166 --> 00:35:38,766 SWEET JANE. 738 00:35:38,767 --> 00:35:40,767 SHE BROKE UP WITH ME. 739 00:35:56,585 --> 00:35:59,325 SHE SAID WE ONLY HAD TWO SCENARIOS. 740 00:35:59,328 --> 00:36:01,688 EITHER I'D EVENTUALLY LEAVE HER, 741 00:36:01,690 --> 00:36:05,260 OR I WOULD STICK AROUND AND RESENT HER FOR IT. 742 00:36:05,264 --> 00:36:07,774 SHE SAID WE WOULD ONLY END TRAGICALLY. 743 00:36:07,766 --> 00:36:11,796 I TOLD HER SHE WAS WRONG. SHE WOULDN'T LISTEN. 744 00:36:11,800 --> 00:36:13,840 SHE WOULDN'T LISTEN... TODAY. 745 00:36:13,842 --> 00:36:16,252 TOMORROW. TOMORROW'S A GREAT DAY FOR LISTENING. 746 00:36:16,245 --> 00:36:19,375 THERE'S NOTHING KEEPING ME IN NEW YORK NOW. 747 00:36:19,378 --> 00:36:21,808 I SHOULD'VE TAKEN CLIFFORD'S OFFER. 748 00:36:21,810 --> 00:36:24,580 MAYBE THEY HAVEN'T FILLED IT. MAYBE I CAN STILL CALL. 749 00:36:24,583 --> 00:36:27,593 DID YOUR MUSICAL HEROES QUIT WHEN THE GOING GOT TOUGH? 750 00:36:27,586 --> 00:36:29,756 DID THE CLASH? DID THE BEATLES? DID THE DOORS? 751 00:36:29,758 --> 00:36:32,388 WELL, IN THAT ORDER, YES, YES... 752 00:36:32,391 --> 00:36:34,491 AND I HAVE KILLED MEN FOR FAR LESS 753 00:36:34,493 --> 00:36:37,503 THAN INSINUATING THAT I EVER LIKED THE DOORS. 754 00:36:37,496 --> 00:36:39,496 IF YOU'RE READY TO QUIT THAT EASILY, 755 00:36:39,498 --> 00:36:42,428 MAYBE SARAH WAS RIGHT TO CUT YOU LOOSE 756 00:36:42,431 --> 00:36:45,201 BEFORE YOU BROKE HER HEART. 757 00:36:50,609 --> 00:36:52,609 (click) (dance music playing) 758 00:36:52,611 --> 00:36:54,941 MUST YOU PUNISH US? I WANNA HEAR JACK. 759 00:36:54,943 --> 00:36:56,693 CHANGE THE STATION, BEN. NO. 760 00:36:56,685 --> 00:36:58,645 (woman) FRANK, YOU'RE ON IN RED HOOK. 761 00:36:58,647 --> 00:37:00,847 (man) Hey, what happened to Jack? 762 00:37:00,849 --> 00:37:04,319 Why isn't he on anymore? (woman) JACK KOZAKOWSKI HIT THE ROAD A COUPLE OF WEEKS AGO. 763 00:37:04,323 --> 00:37:06,333 NOW YOU'RE HANGING WITH THE MOON QUEEN. 764 00:37:06,325 --> 00:37:09,755 (turns off radio) THERE YOU GO. HE'S PROBABLY IN SEATTLE BY NOW. 765 00:37:11,760 --> 00:37:13,600 I'M SORRY. 766 00:37:13,602 --> 00:37:17,472 BEN, YOU GET TO CHOOSE THE STATION IN THE CAR, OKAY? 767 00:37:17,466 --> 00:37:20,936 ANYTHING YOU LIKE. 768 00:37:27,476 --> 00:37:29,846 HI. MAY I HAVE A LARGE COFFEE, PLEASE? 769 00:37:29,848 --> 00:37:32,348 AND, UH, DO YOU HAVE ANY CROISSANTS TODAY? 770 00:37:32,351 --> 00:37:34,581 I THINK I TOOK THE LAST ONE. 771 00:37:34,583 --> 00:37:38,033 YOU REALIZE YOU'RE OBLIGATED TO SHARE WITH ME NOW, RIGHT? 772 00:37:38,026 --> 00:37:40,286 SO I DID WHAT YOU SUGGESTED. 773 00:37:40,289 --> 00:37:42,729 I CAN BE VERY SUGGESTIVE. 774 00:37:42,731 --> 00:37:45,031 I FILLED OUT A QUESTIONNAIRE, PICKED A PSEUDONYM. 775 00:37:45,033 --> 00:37:49,043 I HAVE THE RESULTS RIGHT HERE IN MY BAG. SHOULD WE-- 776 00:37:49,037 --> 00:37:51,667 (scoffs) TOO BUSY FOR A SECOND DATE, 777 00:37:51,670 --> 00:37:55,740 BUT NOT TOO BUSY FOR A FREAKIN' PASTRY, EH? (sighs) 778 00:37:55,744 --> 00:37:57,714 "TRUE CONNECTION"? 779 00:37:57,706 --> 00:38:00,876 "WHEN YOU KNOW, YOU KNOW. LET'S WELCOME THE DAWN." 780 00:38:00,879 --> 00:38:02,649 YOU SLEAZY, LYING CREEP. 781 00:38:07,486 --> 00:38:10,586 "LET'S WELCOME THE DAWN"? 782 00:38:10,589 --> 00:38:13,459 UM... I DON'T SUPPOSE WE COULD FORGET 783 00:38:13,462 --> 00:38:16,292 THE LAST 40 SECONDS EVER HAPPENED, COULD WE? 784 00:38:16,294 --> 00:38:19,734 NO. BUT WE CAN FORGET ABOUT ALL THE TIME LEADING UP TO IT. 785 00:38:19,728 --> 00:38:21,768 RIGHT. (chuckles nervously) I UNDERSTAND. 786 00:38:21,770 --> 00:38:24,770 UM, YOU STILL WANT TO SEE THE DATEWELL RESULTS? 787 00:38:24,773 --> 00:38:26,783 OR IF THEY MATCHED US, 788 00:38:26,775 --> 00:38:30,405 WILL YOU LOSE ALL FAITH IN COMPUTER DATING? 789 00:38:34,082 --> 00:38:37,592 OH... NO. 790 00:38:39,488 --> 00:38:42,488 "TAMARA DE LEMPICKA." 791 00:38:42,491 --> 00:38:45,451 THAT'S YOUR MATCH? 792 00:38:45,454 --> 00:38:47,534 TAMARA. 793 00:38:47,526 --> 00:38:50,826 THAT'S A HOT GIRL'S NAME, RIGHT? 794 00:38:50,829 --> 00:38:54,599 I'VE KNOWN TWO TAMARAS. 795 00:38:54,603 --> 00:38:57,573 IT CAN GO EITHER WAY. 796 00:38:57,566 --> 00:38:59,936 TAMARA... 797 00:38:59,938 --> 00:39:02,408 (woman) SARAH. 798 00:39:02,411 --> 00:39:04,371 IS YOUR CELL PHONE OFF? 799 00:39:06,375 --> 00:39:09,345 (groans) DEAD BATTERY. GREAT. BEN'S SCHOOL CALLED. 800 00:39:09,347 --> 00:39:11,647 THEY'VE BEEN TRYING TO REACH YOU FOR AN HOUR. 801 00:39:11,650 --> 00:39:15,580 HE'S LOCKED HIMSELF IN THE BOYS' BATHROOM AGAIN. (groans) 802 00:39:34,002 --> 00:39:36,612 BEN, YOU OKAY? YEAH. 803 00:39:36,605 --> 00:39:38,505 UH, HE CALLED ME ON MY CELL PHONE. 804 00:39:38,507 --> 00:39:41,707 I CAME AS SOON AS I HEARD. I BROUGHT YOU SOME CLOTHES, 805 00:39:41,710 --> 00:39:44,410 UNLESS YOU WANNA STAY IN WHAT YOU HAVE. 806 00:39:44,413 --> 00:39:48,493 I KINDA FEEL LIKE I'M IN A DRESS, SO... 807 00:39:48,487 --> 00:39:50,487 THANKS FOR COMING. 808 00:39:50,489 --> 00:39:53,559 THOUGHT YOU'D BE IN SEATTLE BY NOW. 809 00:39:53,562 --> 00:39:55,822 SEATTLE DIDN'T SOUND LIKE A FIT. 810 00:39:55,824 --> 00:39:59,474 THE FLANNEL SHIRTS, COFFEE, OUTRIGGER CLUBS... 811 00:39:59,468 --> 00:40:00,828 (chuckles) THANKS, BUT, NO. 812 00:40:00,829 --> 00:40:02,529 THE FACT IS, 813 00:40:02,531 --> 00:40:05,571 I THINK MAYBE NEW YORK CITY STILL HAS A LOT TO OFFER. 814 00:40:05,574 --> 00:40:08,044 YOU THINK SO? I DO. 815 00:40:08,036 --> 00:40:10,536 I'VE BEEN WORKING ON, UH, FIGURING OUT WHAT WORK 816 00:40:10,539 --> 00:40:12,039 WILL MAKE ME HAPPY. 817 00:40:12,040 --> 00:40:15,110 UH, I FIGURED IF I CAN MAKE MYSELF HAPPY, 818 00:40:15,113 --> 00:40:17,193 THEN I COULD SPREAD SOME JOY. 819 00:40:17,185 --> 00:40:19,615 HOW'S THAT WORKING OUT FOR YOU? 820 00:40:19,618 --> 00:40:22,188 I THINK I'LL GET MY ANSWER SOON ENOUGH. 821 00:40:26,755 --> 00:40:28,625 I LIKE THEIR CHANCES. 822 00:40:28,627 --> 00:40:30,727 THEIR COMMON INTERESTS DIDN'T HURT. 823 00:40:30,729 --> 00:40:33,529 LISTEN, I'M GONNA GO SEE JACK AND SARAH AND THE KIDS 824 00:40:33,532 --> 00:40:35,532 AFTER THIS FOR THE GRAND OPENING. 825 00:40:35,534 --> 00:40:37,914 ANY INTEREST IN JOINING ME? ME? NOW? 826 00:40:37,906 --> 00:40:40,566 CAN WE NOT PRETEND YOU HAVE ANY OTHER PLANS? I'LL GET MY PURSE. 827 00:40:40,569 --> 00:40:42,569 GREAT. (sighs) 828 00:40:52,551 --> 00:40:55,551 (The Pixies' "Here Comes Your Man" playing) 829 00:41:05,634 --> 00:41:09,844 ♪ OUTSIDE, THERE'S A BOXCAR WAITING ♪ 830 00:41:09,838 --> 00:41:11,568 ♪ OUTSIDE THE FAMILY... ♪ 831 00:41:11,570 --> 00:41:14,070 SO YOU STILL WORRIED ABOUT CARRYING CDs 832 00:41:14,072 --> 00:41:15,542 ALONGSIDE THE VINYL? 833 00:41:15,544 --> 00:41:19,654 NAH. YOU KNOW, WITH MP3s ALL OVER, 834 00:41:19,648 --> 00:41:22,478 (clicks teeth) CDs ARE THE NEW VINYL. 835 00:41:22,480 --> 00:41:23,850 JUST RETRO ENOUGH. 836 00:41:23,852 --> 00:41:26,182 OH, LOOK AT ADAM. 837 00:41:26,184 --> 00:41:27,694 HE LOVES THIS PLACE. 838 00:41:27,686 --> 00:41:29,756 MM. YEAH, THE KID KNOWS HIS STUFF. 839 00:41:29,758 --> 00:41:31,588 YOU TAUGHT HIM WELL. 840 00:41:31,590 --> 00:41:33,060 ♪ THE BOXCAR WAITING ♪ 841 00:41:33,061 --> 00:41:34,591 ♪ TAKE ME AWAY TO... ♪ 842 00:41:34,593 --> 00:41:39,503 LOOK AT THIS. ALL THE BANDS I LISTENED TO IN COLLEGE-- 843 00:41:39,497 --> 00:41:40,927 PAVEMENT, LIZ PHAIR. 844 00:41:40,929 --> 00:41:43,569 I LOVED THIS LEMONHEADS RECORD. 845 00:41:43,572 --> 00:41:45,602 DO YOU HAVE A RECORD PLAYER? 846 00:41:45,604 --> 00:41:48,884 NO, BUT MAYBE I'LL GET ONE. MAYBE YOU'LL MEET A GUY WHO LIKES RECORDS, TOO. 847 00:41:48,877 --> 00:41:50,577 EXPLORE YOUR COMMONALITIES, 848 00:41:50,579 --> 00:41:52,779 LIKE YOUR DATEWELL QUESTIONNAIRE. 849 00:41:52,781 --> 00:41:54,681 DATEWELL AND I HAVE PARTED WAYS. 850 00:41:54,683 --> 00:41:57,023 OH. WHY? 851 00:41:57,015 --> 00:41:59,015 RECENT DEVELOPMENTS SUGGEST TO ME 852 00:41:59,017 --> 00:42:02,017 THAT A COMPUTER MAY BE UNABLE TO IDENTIFY CERTAIN FACTORS 853 00:42:02,020 --> 00:42:04,620 REQUIRED TO, UH, BRING A RELATIONSHIP TO LIFE. 854 00:42:04,623 --> 00:42:06,733 INTERESTING. 855 00:42:06,725 --> 00:42:09,595 YES, THIS IS WHERE YOU GLOAT, BRAG, 856 00:42:09,598 --> 00:42:11,558 DO YOUR LITTLE GOALPOST DANCE. 857 00:42:11,560 --> 00:42:12,960 NO DANCING, 858 00:42:12,961 --> 00:42:15,861 FOR IT SEEMS WE HAVE MADE AN IDEOLOGICAL DO-SI-DO. 859 00:42:15,864 --> 00:42:18,544 WHAT, YOU THINK COMPUTERS CAN PLAY A ROLE 860 00:42:18,536 --> 00:42:21,036 IN BRINGING PEOPLE TOGETHER? PROVIDED THEY WORK HAND IN HAND 861 00:42:21,039 --> 00:42:23,039 WITH A HUMAN UNDERSTANDING OF RELATIONSHIPS. 862 00:42:23,041 --> 00:42:25,611 LOOK, I MIGHT HAVE BEEN A LITTLE HASTY 863 00:42:25,614 --> 00:42:29,624 AND HARSH WITH YOU, CLAIRE, AND I OWE YOU AN APOLOGY 864 00:42:29,618 --> 00:42:32,048 FOR NOT BEING MORE OPEN TO OTHER PERSPECTIVES. 865 00:42:32,050 --> 00:42:33,780 WOW. 866 00:42:33,782 --> 00:42:36,052 WELL, THANK YOU, TREVOR. 867 00:42:36,054 --> 00:42:38,064 THAT REALLY MEANS A LOT. 868 00:42:38,056 --> 00:42:41,186 YOU'RE WELCOME, TAMARA. 869 00:42:41,189 --> 00:42:43,959 ♪ HERE COMES YOUR MAN ♪