1 00:00:09,844 --> 00:00:16,350 ♪ 2 00:00:18,435 --> 00:00:20,019 And that totally proves... 3 00:00:20,061 --> 00:00:21,941 that neither me nor Sam can play the guitar. 4 00:00:23,691 --> 00:00:25,484 Okay, now it's time for a brand-new segment 5 00:00:25,526 --> 00:00:27,778 here on iCarly. Which we call... 6 00:00:27,820 --> 00:00:31,824 The Blab Cam! Actually, it's really called 7 00:00:31,866 --> 00:00:33,367 two-way high-speed video confer... 8 00:00:33,408 --> 00:00:35,703 Well, we're calling it The Blab Cam, so get used to it. 9 00:00:37,078 --> 00:00:38,497 Freddie, let's talk to someone. 10 00:00:38,539 --> 00:00:41,040 Okay, we got a bunch of people waiting here. 11 00:00:41,082 --> 00:00:42,918 Uh... ooh! 12 00:00:42,960 --> 00:00:44,545 Here's a guy all the way from Poland. 13 00:00:48,298 --> 00:00:49,758 What's up? Hey, Poland. 14 00:01:03,814 --> 00:01:05,774 Uh... 15 00:01:05,816 --> 00:01:08,610 So take that, Poland. 16 00:01:11,070 --> 00:01:12,696 Now let's try some viewers from this country. 17 00:01:12,698 --> 00:01:15,034 Okay, uh... 18 00:01:15,075 --> 00:01:17,411 here's a girl named Valerie from Seattle. 19 00:01:17,452 --> 00:01:18,913 Hi, there. What's up, girl? 20 00:01:18,954 --> 00:01:20,414 Hey, you guys. My name's Valerie... 21 00:01:20,455 --> 00:01:22,290 Long-time viewer, first time Blab Camer. 22 00:01:22,332 --> 00:01:23,751 I just love iCarly. 23 00:01:23,792 --> 00:01:25,168 Awesome! Thanks a lot. 24 00:01:25,210 --> 00:01:27,922 Um, you look kind of familiar. Have we seen you before? 25 00:01:27,963 --> 00:01:30,007 Yeah, I go to school with you guys. 26 00:01:30,049 --> 00:01:32,009 I'm just one grade ahead of you. 27 00:01:32,051 --> 00:01:34,386 Hey, is Freddie there? Can I see him? 28 00:01:34,428 --> 00:01:36,028 Why would a person want to see Freddie? 29 00:01:40,308 --> 00:01:41,810 Right here, Valerie. 30 00:01:41,852 --> 00:01:44,438 Alright, can I just say I think you're insanely cute? 31 00:01:44,479 --> 00:01:46,189 Yeah? 32 00:01:46,231 --> 00:01:48,791 Uh Valerie, you might want to check your webcam and your brain, 33 00:01:48,817 --> 00:01:50,819 'cause I'm pretty sure one of 'em's malfunctioning. 34 00:01:52,153 --> 00:01:55,323 Sam! Hey, Valerie, since you think Freddie's cute, 35 00:01:55,365 --> 00:01:56,784 why don't you go on a date with him? 36 00:01:56,825 --> 00:01:58,535 Yeah, it's a new feature on iCarly, 37 00:01:58,577 --> 00:01:59,870 which we call Date the Dork. 38 00:02:01,455 --> 00:02:02,831 What do you say, Val? 39 00:02:02,873 --> 00:02:05,000 Well, I don't think Freddie's a dork, 40 00:02:05,042 --> 00:02:06,877 and I'd love to go on a date with him. 41 00:02:06,919 --> 00:02:09,004 You won't be jealous? I'll try to be strong. 42 00:02:09,046 --> 00:02:10,631 Yes! 43 00:02:10,672 --> 00:02:12,841 Okay, Valerie. Just email Freddie the address 44 00:02:12,883 --> 00:02:14,591 of the mental institution you're locked up in 45 00:02:14,593 --> 00:02:15,803 and he'll meet you there. 46 00:02:17,638 --> 00:02:21,016 In five, four, three, two... 47 00:02:22,183 --> 00:02:23,477 ♪ 48 00:02:23,518 --> 00:02:26,187 ♪ I know you see ♪ 49 00:02:26,229 --> 00:02:28,273 ♪ Somehow the world will change for me ♪ 50 00:02:28,315 --> 00:02:31,151 ♪ And be so wonderful ♪ 51 00:02:31,192 --> 00:02:32,736 ♪ 52 00:02:32,778 --> 00:02:34,947 ♪ Live life, breathe air ♪ 53 00:02:34,989 --> 00:02:37,449 ♪ I know somehow we're gonna get there ♪ 54 00:02:37,491 --> 00:02:40,452 ♪ And feel so wonderful ♪ 55 00:02:40,494 --> 00:02:42,203 ♪ 56 00:02:42,245 --> 00:02:45,833 ♪ It's all for real ♪ 57 00:02:45,874 --> 00:02:48,418 ♪ I'm telling you just how I feel ♪ 58 00:02:48,460 --> 00:02:52,297 ♪ So wake up, the members of my nation ♪ 59 00:02:52,339 --> 00:02:54,049 ♪ It's your time to be ♪ 60 00:02:54,091 --> 00:02:56,844 ♪ There's no chance unless you take one ♪ 61 00:02:56,885 --> 00:02:59,262 ♪ Have the time to see the brighter side ♪ 62 00:02:59,304 --> 00:03:02,850 ♪ Of every situation ♪ 63 00:03:02,891 --> 00:03:04,309 ♪ Some things are meant to be ♪ 64 00:03:04,351 --> 00:03:08,229 ♪ So give me your best and leave the rest to me ♪ 65 00:03:08,271 --> 00:03:10,482 ♪ Leave it all to me ♪ 66 00:03:10,524 --> 00:03:12,734 ♪ Leave it all to me ♪ 67 00:03:12,776 --> 00:03:15,487 ♪ Just leave it all to me ♪ 68 00:03:22,036 --> 00:03:26,331 ♪ 69 00:03:26,373 --> 00:03:29,084 So, you're gonna kiss her? 70 00:03:29,126 --> 00:03:31,086 I'm not even sure I should take her out. 71 00:03:31,128 --> 00:03:32,796 You should take the girl out, kiss her, 72 00:03:32,838 --> 00:03:34,422 then step back before she pukes. 73 00:03:36,008 --> 00:03:37,592 I got it. 74 00:03:39,803 --> 00:03:42,056 Freddie! Uh, come in? 75 00:03:44,349 --> 00:03:46,852 Mom, what are you doing... I'm so proud of you. 76 00:03:46,894 --> 00:03:48,687 I can't believe it's finally happening. 77 00:03:48,729 --> 00:03:50,814 Your first date. Mom! 78 00:03:50,856 --> 00:03:52,482 And with a girl! Mom! 79 00:03:53,775 --> 00:03:56,611 We're all in shock. How did you know? 80 00:03:56,653 --> 00:03:58,697 I was watching iCarly online. 81 00:03:58,739 --> 00:04:00,615 I didn't know you watched our show. 82 00:04:00,657 --> 00:04:03,869 I always watch because I've been worried about your posture. 83 00:04:03,911 --> 00:04:06,163 It seems somebody forgot our little rule. 84 00:04:06,205 --> 00:04:09,041 What rule? Just skip it, alright? 85 00:04:09,083 --> 00:04:11,626 Freddie, tell her the rule about standing up straight. 86 00:04:14,295 --> 00:04:16,135 You won't get respect if your back's not erect. 87 00:04:19,760 --> 00:04:21,970 Oh, and I already have the perfect outfit 88 00:04:22,012 --> 00:04:23,847 for you to wear on the date. 89 00:04:23,889 --> 00:04:25,974 I'm not even sure if I'm going on this date. 90 00:04:26,016 --> 00:04:28,060 Yes, you are. You're going. 91 00:04:28,102 --> 00:04:30,810 But what if she's not a... There is a living, breathing girl out there 92 00:04:30,812 --> 00:04:35,192 who wants to go out with you. This may never happen again. 93 00:04:35,234 --> 00:04:36,359 Unless... 94 00:04:36,401 --> 00:04:38,028 Carly changes her mind. 95 00:04:38,070 --> 00:04:39,821 Uh, yeah, Freddie and I are just friends. 96 00:04:39,863 --> 00:04:41,782 I totally understand. Thank you. 97 00:04:41,823 --> 00:04:43,658 Why won't you love my son?! 98 00:04:43,700 --> 00:04:46,120 Mom! I'm sorry. 99 00:04:46,161 --> 00:04:49,248 Anyway, I already have the whole date planned out. 100 00:04:50,916 --> 00:04:53,293 First, I'm gonna cook a lovely fat-free dinner, 101 00:04:53,334 --> 00:04:55,670 and then we're gonna look at your baby pictures. 102 00:04:55,712 --> 00:04:57,256 Freddie had the cutest little bottom. 103 00:05:00,467 --> 00:05:02,947 Okay, I'll give you $1,000 for one picture of Freddie's butt. 104 00:05:05,264 --> 00:05:09,643 Uh, Mrs. Benson? 105 00:05:09,684 --> 00:05:12,646 We already told Freddie he could have his date here. 106 00:05:12,687 --> 00:05:14,689 Why here? Uh... 107 00:05:14,731 --> 00:05:17,109 'cause my brother's an amazing cook? 108 00:05:17,151 --> 00:05:20,654 Yeah, and he promised to make us his special... 109 00:05:20,695 --> 00:05:22,156 Spaghetti tacos. 110 00:05:24,365 --> 00:05:27,119 What? Noodles can't live happily in a hard corn shell? 111 00:05:27,161 --> 00:05:33,000 ♪ 112 00:05:33,041 --> 00:05:34,751 ♪ I'm cooking, I'm cooking things ♪ 113 00:05:34,793 --> 00:05:36,193 ♪ Cooking things for people to eat ♪ 114 00:05:36,211 --> 00:05:37,754 ♪ I'm cooking, I'm cooking things ♪ 115 00:05:37,796 --> 00:05:39,881 ♪ Things that people will chew ♪ 116 00:05:41,967 --> 00:05:43,718 Mom, will you stop it? 117 00:05:43,760 --> 00:05:45,512 But I'm not done fluffing your hair! 118 00:05:45,553 --> 00:05:46,638 Yes, you are! 119 00:05:48,473 --> 00:05:51,685 How many times have I told you not to yank electrical cords? 120 00:05:51,726 --> 00:05:53,270 Mom, I don't need you to... 121 00:05:53,312 --> 00:05:55,563 I'm gonna go plug this back in, and when I come back, 122 00:05:55,605 --> 00:05:56,898 that hair will be fluffed. 123 00:05:58,566 --> 00:05:59,776 Hurry! 124 00:06:02,779 --> 00:06:05,282 There, alright! 125 00:06:05,324 --> 00:06:08,660 Now, when Valerie gets here, I need you... 126 00:06:13,248 --> 00:06:14,791 Bye, Mom! 127 00:06:17,961 --> 00:06:20,755 Okay, what up with that outfit? 128 00:06:20,797 --> 00:06:26,178 Ugh, my mom made me go shopping at the Wild Wild Vest. 129 00:06:26,220 --> 00:06:28,847 You got my backup clothes? Upstairs. Help me. 130 00:06:32,267 --> 00:06:33,768 Hey, Spence? 131 00:06:33,810 --> 00:06:36,395 Can I talk to you seriously for a sec? 132 00:06:36,437 --> 00:06:38,815 Need a little first date advice? 133 00:06:38,857 --> 00:06:40,441 Couldn't hurt. I'm a little nervous. 134 00:06:40,483 --> 00:06:43,820 Just be yourself. Talk about stuff you like. 135 00:06:43,862 --> 00:06:45,572 And if I run out of things to say? 136 00:06:45,613 --> 00:06:48,533 Then just stare into her eyes and say nothing. 137 00:06:48,575 --> 00:06:50,660 That'll make you seem all cool and mysterious. 138 00:06:50,702 --> 00:06:52,037 She'll be, like, hypnotized. 139 00:06:53,621 --> 00:06:55,580 Yeah, I don't really think that works, 'cause, I mean, 140 00:06:55,582 --> 00:06:57,422 if I don't say anything, won't she think I'm... 141 00:06:59,586 --> 00:07:00,962 Won't she think I'm... 142 00:07:02,589 --> 00:07:04,258 Won't she just... 143 00:07:07,677 --> 00:07:09,221 What doesn't really work? 144 00:07:11,765 --> 00:07:13,016 Alright, we got the clothes. 145 00:07:13,058 --> 00:07:14,517 Good, I'll go change in the, uh... 146 00:07:17,478 --> 00:07:19,856 It's Valerie! Uh, Sam, stall her! 147 00:07:19,898 --> 00:07:21,338 Freddie, take off the stupid clothes. 148 00:07:23,651 --> 00:07:24,734 Hey, Valerie, how goes it? 149 00:07:24,736 --> 00:07:25,904 I'm great. Is Freddie here? 150 00:07:25,946 --> 00:07:27,322 'Cause I've been thinking... 151 00:07:28,531 --> 00:07:30,117 I said to stall her. She is. 152 00:07:30,158 --> 00:07:32,535 I slammed the door right in her face. 153 00:07:32,577 --> 00:07:35,538 Alright, okay. I'm fine. 154 00:07:35,580 --> 00:07:37,124 I am good. My jacket... 155 00:07:37,165 --> 00:07:39,542 There you go. Alright. I'm okay. 156 00:07:39,584 --> 00:07:40,501 Alright, how do I look? 157 00:07:40,543 --> 00:07:41,711 Well... Sam. 158 00:07:42,963 --> 00:07:46,174 You look great. Just, uh, here. 159 00:07:47,592 --> 00:07:48,760 Okay, there. 160 00:07:51,805 --> 00:07:53,432 Alright, fine! My hair's fine! 161 00:07:55,725 --> 00:07:57,476 Fine, thank you! 162 00:07:57,518 --> 00:07:59,187 Come on, let's go upstairs. But why? 163 00:07:59,229 --> 00:08:01,106 But I just really wanna... oh, okay! 164 00:08:05,610 --> 00:08:07,279 Hi. 165 00:08:07,321 --> 00:08:09,401 You're not gonna slam the door in my face, are you? 166 00:08:09,406 --> 00:08:10,615 Of course not. 167 00:08:10,657 --> 00:08:12,075 Come on in. Thanks. 168 00:08:15,120 --> 00:08:17,580 So this is really where you guys do iCarly from? 169 00:08:17,622 --> 00:08:20,167 This is the place. I live across the hall there. 170 00:08:20,208 --> 00:08:22,502 Mr. Freddie, Miss Valerie, 171 00:08:22,543 --> 00:08:24,545 I will be your server this evening. 172 00:08:24,587 --> 00:08:27,757 May I take your fuchsia jacket? Sure. 173 00:08:36,099 --> 00:08:37,600 And how about some music? 174 00:08:37,642 --> 00:08:38,852 Great. Awesome. 175 00:08:42,481 --> 00:08:48,778 ♪ 176 00:09:01,166 --> 00:09:02,876 Perhaps another selection... 177 00:09:02,917 --> 00:09:04,169 at a lower volume. 178 00:09:09,174 --> 00:09:17,174 ♪ 179 00:09:21,353 --> 00:09:24,064 Now let's see if I can figure this out. 180 00:09:24,105 --> 00:09:26,274 What are you trying to... 181 00:09:26,316 --> 00:09:27,775 And this should give us picture. 182 00:09:30,362 --> 00:09:32,447 How do you... I set up one of Freddie's 183 00:09:32,489 --> 00:09:34,199 little webcams and aimed it at the table. 184 00:09:34,241 --> 00:09:35,742 But that's spying. 185 00:09:35,783 --> 00:09:37,863 We can't spy on Freddie while he's on his first date. 186 00:09:39,037 --> 00:09:40,705 This is a really good spaghetti taco. 187 00:09:40,747 --> 00:09:41,998 We're bad people. 188 00:09:43,833 --> 00:09:45,502 So the rabbi says to the nurse, 189 00:09:45,544 --> 00:09:47,712 "Why even have a three-chip, hi-def camcorder 190 00:09:47,754 --> 00:09:49,506 if you can't calibrate the white balance?" 191 00:09:53,718 --> 00:09:56,346 You know, I have never met anyone who's so funny 192 00:09:56,388 --> 00:09:58,848 and who knows so much about audio and video. 193 00:09:58,890 --> 00:10:01,726 Hey, nobody knows audio and video like Freddie-o. 194 00:10:04,645 --> 00:10:06,647 Would you care to see a dessert menu? 195 00:10:06,689 --> 00:10:07,815 Sure. Sounds good. 196 00:10:11,152 --> 00:10:13,488 I guess we'll have the pudding. 197 00:10:13,530 --> 00:10:15,323 I'm sorry, we're out of the pudding. 198 00:10:15,365 --> 00:10:21,371 ♪ 199 00:10:21,413 --> 00:10:24,249 So, who helps you with all the technical stuff on iCarly? 200 00:10:24,291 --> 00:10:26,418 Nobody, just me. Amazing. 201 00:10:26,460 --> 00:10:29,296 It looks so cool online. 202 00:10:29,337 --> 00:10:31,047 Good berries. Well, it's berry season. 203 00:10:31,089 --> 00:10:32,591 I did not know that. 204 00:10:32,631 --> 00:10:37,220 ♪ 205 00:10:37,262 --> 00:10:40,890 Yup, we've gone out together every night this week so far. 206 00:10:40,932 --> 00:10:43,935 I'd say we're almost officially boyfriend and girlfriend. 207 00:10:43,977 --> 00:10:45,228 So which one are you? 208 00:10:46,854 --> 00:10:49,857 Have you kissed her yet? Maybe. A little. 209 00:10:49,899 --> 00:10:52,402 No way! Did she puke? 210 00:10:52,444 --> 00:10:54,571 Wait, wait. Was it this kind of kiss? 211 00:10:54,613 --> 00:10:56,030 Or was it more like... 212 00:11:00,910 --> 00:11:02,287 Hey, Jeremy. Hi, Jeremy. 213 00:11:04,038 --> 00:11:06,040 Still got that cold, huh? Yeah. 214 00:11:06,082 --> 00:11:08,042 Hey, you coming to the computer expo this weekend? 215 00:11:08,084 --> 00:11:09,169 No, I can't. 216 00:11:09,210 --> 00:11:10,667 I'm going roller skating with Valerie. 217 00:11:10,669 --> 00:11:14,299 Well, maybe we could... 218 00:11:14,341 --> 00:11:17,594 Ah, jeez, I think I just sprayed my throat. 219 00:11:19,471 --> 00:11:21,556 Great saying you. Bye, Jeremy. 220 00:11:21,598 --> 00:11:23,350 Man, I don't think I've ever seen that kid 221 00:11:23,391 --> 00:11:24,683 when he wasn't sneezing and... 222 00:11:26,603 --> 00:11:27,895 Wasn't there a dork next to me? 223 00:11:30,357 --> 00:11:31,858 Hey, you. Hey, baby. 224 00:11:33,193 --> 00:11:34,819 So, Freddie... So, Val... 225 00:11:34,861 --> 00:11:36,530 Remember when we were on our first date 226 00:11:36,571 --> 00:11:37,864 and you were telling me 227 00:11:37,905 --> 00:11:39,197 how much fun it is doing a webcast? 228 00:11:39,199 --> 00:11:42,035 Yeah, sure. I want to do one. 229 00:11:42,076 --> 00:11:44,496 Really? Well, you should. 230 00:11:44,538 --> 00:11:45,997 It's a lot of fun. 231 00:11:46,039 --> 00:11:48,041 Well, yeah, but I know, like, nothing about 232 00:11:48,082 --> 00:11:51,919 all the techy stuff, so I was just thinking... 233 00:11:51,961 --> 00:11:54,214 you wanna do it with me? 234 00:11:54,255 --> 00:11:56,424 You mean, you and me do a webcast together? 235 00:11:56,466 --> 00:11:57,925 Uh-huh! 236 00:11:57,967 --> 00:12:00,261 We can do one every week starting tomorrow night. 237 00:12:00,303 --> 00:12:02,222 But tomorrow night is when I do iCarly. 238 00:12:03,264 --> 00:12:05,183 Oh. 239 00:12:05,225 --> 00:12:07,143 Well, okay. 240 00:12:07,185 --> 00:12:08,727 But I'll help you any other night. 241 00:12:08,769 --> 00:12:10,522 Nah, no thanks. 242 00:12:10,564 --> 00:12:12,440 I really want to do it tomorrow night. 243 00:12:12,482 --> 00:12:14,192 But Carly and Sam are my friends. 244 00:12:14,234 --> 00:12:15,818 I can't just bail on them. 245 00:12:15,860 --> 00:12:19,113 Um, from what you told me, Sam's not your friend. 246 00:12:19,155 --> 00:12:21,555 You said she's always calling you names and putting you down. 247 00:12:21,575 --> 00:12:24,202 I know, but she can't help it. She's just naturally vicious. 248 00:12:25,828 --> 00:12:27,744 And doesn't she always call you a button-pushing monkey 249 00:12:27,746 --> 00:12:29,916 and tell you you're not important to the show? 250 00:12:29,957 --> 00:12:32,711 Yeah, but... Whatever. 251 00:12:32,751 --> 00:12:34,462 Don't worry about it. 252 00:12:34,504 --> 00:12:37,257 I can just find someone else to help me. 253 00:12:37,298 --> 00:12:39,008 Hey, wait. 254 00:12:41,802 --> 00:12:43,930 I guess, uh... 255 00:12:43,971 --> 00:12:46,099 I guess Carly and Sam can find another tech producer. 256 00:12:46,140 --> 00:12:48,727 Aww! Now that's my Freddie bear. 257 00:12:53,064 --> 00:12:55,609 She kissed you, and she's not even your mom. 258 00:12:58,069 --> 00:12:59,195 Impressive! 259 00:13:04,033 --> 00:13:09,205 ♪ 260 00:13:13,251 --> 00:13:14,531 Hey, I got your text message... 261 00:13:16,296 --> 00:13:17,505 Freddie quit! Quit what? 262 00:13:17,547 --> 00:13:19,424 Sucking his thumb? 263 00:13:19,466 --> 00:13:20,925 He quit iCarly! What? 264 00:13:20,967 --> 00:13:22,093 By email. 265 00:13:22,135 --> 00:13:23,928 What's wrong with the little punk? 266 00:13:23,970 --> 00:13:25,388 I don't know. 267 00:13:25,430 --> 00:13:28,767 Let's go slap some sense into that boy. 268 00:13:28,807 --> 00:13:30,727 Freddie! 269 00:13:30,769 --> 00:13:32,395 Freddie, open the door! Open up! 270 00:13:32,437 --> 00:13:34,897 We need to talk to you right now! 271 00:13:34,939 --> 00:13:36,566 Uh, Freddie's not here. 272 00:13:36,608 --> 00:13:38,401 I'm just a lady! 273 00:13:40,654 --> 00:13:42,530 What are you doing? Picking the lock. 274 00:13:42,572 --> 00:13:44,732 How are you gonna pick the lock with... oh, like that. 275 00:13:46,534 --> 00:13:48,787 Come here, Freddie! Leave me alone, Sam! 276 00:13:48,827 --> 00:13:50,163 Sam, what are you gonna... 277 00:13:50,204 --> 00:13:51,665 Aah! 278 00:13:56,961 --> 00:13:58,254 That was assault! 279 00:13:59,880 --> 00:14:02,008 Why are you quitting iCarly? Yeah, why? 280 00:14:02,049 --> 00:14:04,927 Well, 'cause... 281 00:14:04,969 --> 00:14:06,678 'cause maybe I don't like the way Sam treats me. 282 00:14:06,680 --> 00:14:08,222 Oh, come on. 283 00:14:08,264 --> 00:14:10,558 Yeah, yes, she's always putting me down, and... 284 00:14:10,600 --> 00:14:12,811 And calling me mean names, and... and every time I get 285 00:14:12,851 --> 00:14:14,646 an ice cream cone, she licks it. 286 00:14:14,688 --> 00:14:16,731 She just licks it all over the place just to bug me. 287 00:14:18,358 --> 00:14:20,901 Great, now what's the real reason? 288 00:14:20,943 --> 00:14:25,532 Okay, Valerie wants to do a web show 289 00:14:25,573 --> 00:14:27,450 and she asked me to be her tech producer. 290 00:14:27,492 --> 00:14:29,202 Uh! Uh! 291 00:14:29,243 --> 00:14:31,579 So you're just gonna ditch iCarly for another web show? 292 00:14:31,621 --> 00:14:32,997 That's competing against us? 293 00:14:33,039 --> 00:14:35,583 Valerie's my girlfriend. What am I supposed to do? 294 00:14:35,625 --> 00:14:36,905 Dump the chick. How about that? 295 00:14:38,044 --> 00:14:40,254 You guys were the ones that talked me into 296 00:14:40,296 --> 00:14:42,256 going out with her, and now I'm the bad guy? 297 00:14:42,298 --> 00:14:43,174 Look, Freddie, you better just... 298 00:14:43,216 --> 00:14:45,176 Stop. 299 00:14:45,218 --> 00:14:46,885 He's right. Huh? 300 00:14:48,847 --> 00:14:50,139 He should help his girlfriend. 301 00:14:51,599 --> 00:14:52,892 Thanks. 302 00:14:56,855 --> 00:14:59,440 And I wasn't gonna leave you guys with no help. 303 00:14:59,482 --> 00:15:02,068 I got you guys a new tech producer... 304 00:15:02,109 --> 00:15:03,903 if you want him. Who? 305 00:15:03,944 --> 00:15:05,152 He's really good with the tech stuff. 306 00:15:05,154 --> 00:15:06,239 Who? 307 00:15:07,490 --> 00:15:09,826 In five... 308 00:15:09,868 --> 00:15:11,536 Four... 309 00:15:11,578 --> 00:15:12,829 Three... 310 00:15:12,871 --> 00:15:15,248 In five, four, three, two, one... I'm Carly. 311 00:15:15,289 --> 00:15:16,791 I'm Sam. And this is... 312 00:15:16,833 --> 00:15:18,000 And this... 313 00:15:18,042 --> 00:15:19,544 And this is iCarly. 314 00:15:21,045 --> 00:15:23,464 Now we'd like to welcome aboard a new member 315 00:15:23,506 --> 00:15:24,716 of the iCarly team. 316 00:15:24,758 --> 00:15:26,467 Our new technical producer, Jeremy. 317 00:15:26,509 --> 00:15:28,428 Or as we like to call him, Germy. 318 00:15:32,891 --> 00:15:35,685 I got some spittle on the lens. 319 00:15:35,727 --> 00:15:37,395 Just wipe it off, Jeremy. 320 00:15:44,026 --> 00:15:46,529 Okay, this is another new segment on iCarly, 321 00:15:46,571 --> 00:15:48,698 which we like to call... 322 00:15:48,740 --> 00:15:50,991 Animals Dressed Like Other Animals. 323 00:15:54,953 --> 00:15:57,998 Okay, first up, we have a dog dressed like a pig. 324 00:15:58,040 --> 00:15:59,793 I'll go get him. You do that, Carls. 325 00:16:01,252 --> 00:16:02,712 We'd like to thank our friend Robin 326 00:16:02,754 --> 00:16:04,380 for letting us borrow her wiener dog. 327 00:16:05,548 --> 00:16:07,091 This is for your Robin. 328 00:16:09,510 --> 00:16:10,929 And thanks to my brother, Spencer, 329 00:16:10,970 --> 00:16:12,806 for letting us use his novelty pig parts. 330 00:16:15,683 --> 00:16:17,894 Um, I'm allergic to pigs. 331 00:16:17,936 --> 00:16:20,062 It's not a pig! It's a wiener dog! 332 00:16:20,104 --> 00:16:22,231 How can you confuse Robin's wiener dog with a pig? 333 00:16:22,273 --> 00:16:24,818 I need a tissue. 334 00:16:24,859 --> 00:16:26,609 We're gonna wrap up the show early tonight. 335 00:16:26,611 --> 00:16:28,613 So join us next week... Or not. 336 00:16:28,655 --> 00:16:30,406 Here at icarly.com. 337 00:16:30,448 --> 00:16:32,032 Maybe, bye. Bye! 338 00:16:32,074 --> 00:16:35,662 ♪ 339 00:16:35,703 --> 00:16:37,956 And... we're clear. 340 00:16:37,996 --> 00:16:42,418 ♪ 341 00:16:42,460 --> 00:16:45,463 Hi, Sam. Hey. 342 00:16:45,505 --> 00:16:47,507 I, uh, watched iCarly the other night. 343 00:16:48,466 --> 00:16:50,885 Yikes. 344 00:16:50,927 --> 00:16:53,220 I don't need your review, alright? 345 00:16:53,262 --> 00:16:56,098 Hey, don't be mad at me. No, I will be mad at you. 346 00:16:56,140 --> 00:16:57,892 You stole Freddie and that hurt our show. 347 00:16:57,934 --> 00:17:01,980 Sam... you don't need iCarly. What do you mean I don't... 348 00:17:02,020 --> 00:17:04,190 Come do my show with me. What? 349 00:17:04,231 --> 00:17:05,733 Oh, come on! 350 00:17:05,775 --> 00:17:07,986 ICarly's gonna crash and burn without Freddie. 351 00:17:08,027 --> 00:17:09,696 I mean, duh. 352 00:17:09,737 --> 00:17:11,698 You know, Carly happens to be my friend. 353 00:17:11,739 --> 00:17:14,617 Then why isn't your web show called Carly and Sam? 354 00:17:14,659 --> 00:17:16,995 Why is it called iCarly? 355 00:17:17,036 --> 00:17:18,913 She didn't come up with the name. 356 00:17:18,955 --> 00:17:20,915 Freddie did. And we all like it. 357 00:17:20,957 --> 00:17:24,502 Well, if you were my cohost, I'd call our show Val and Sam. 358 00:17:26,504 --> 00:17:29,716 Maybe even Sam and Val... if you like that. 359 00:17:34,094 --> 00:17:36,556 This is a serious offer? Oh, yeah. 360 00:17:36,597 --> 00:17:38,265 You, me, and Freddie? Uh-huh. 361 00:17:38,307 --> 00:17:40,685 And we'll knock Carly Shay right off the internet. 362 00:17:40,727 --> 00:17:43,021 And then, in a couple of years, 363 00:17:43,061 --> 00:17:46,148 we could have the most popular show on the web. 364 00:17:46,190 --> 00:17:48,943 I bet we could. That was the plan all along. 365 00:17:48,985 --> 00:17:51,362 You've got a devious little brain. 366 00:17:51,404 --> 00:17:53,573 I like that. I thought you might. 367 00:17:53,614 --> 00:17:55,783 Let's talk tomorrow. Absolutely. 368 00:17:56,868 --> 00:17:59,787 Oh, and don't say anything. 369 00:17:59,829 --> 00:18:02,415 We don't want Carly to know about this. 370 00:18:02,456 --> 00:18:04,333 Believe me, I won't. 371 00:18:05,376 --> 00:18:07,670 She what?! 372 00:18:07,712 --> 00:18:09,672 That skunk bag tried to steal me too! 373 00:18:09,714 --> 00:18:10,924 She wants to ruin iCarly 374 00:18:10,965 --> 00:18:12,800 so she can have the hottest show on the web. 375 00:18:12,842 --> 00:18:15,053 Oh my God, she's just using Freddie! 376 00:18:15,094 --> 00:18:16,679 Yeah, and now she's trying to use me. 377 00:18:16,721 --> 00:18:18,932 That little... Say it! 378 00:18:18,973 --> 00:18:21,601 I don't like to say it. Spencer says it's not ladylike. 379 00:18:21,642 --> 00:18:23,770 Say it! That skunk bag! 380 00:18:23,811 --> 00:18:25,688 Feels good, doesn't it?! Yeah, it does! 381 00:18:25,730 --> 00:18:27,312 We gotta go tell Freddie! Yeah, we are! 382 00:18:27,314 --> 00:18:29,275 Can we get a smoothie first?! No, we cannot! 383 00:18:29,316 --> 00:18:31,903 ♪ 384 00:18:32,987 --> 00:18:34,403 You're talking about my girlfriend. 385 00:18:34,405 --> 00:18:36,616 She's not your girlfriend. She's just using you. 386 00:18:36,657 --> 00:18:38,701 Then I enjoy being used. 387 00:18:40,286 --> 00:18:41,994 Hey, Carly, there's a little girl on the phone. 388 00:18:41,996 --> 00:18:43,516 You wanna buy some Girl Sprout cookies? 389 00:18:43,539 --> 00:18:45,499 No, thanks. No, thanks. 390 00:18:45,541 --> 00:18:47,209 Huh? You gotta believe us. 391 00:18:47,251 --> 00:18:49,629 She tried to get me to be on her web show, too. 392 00:18:49,670 --> 00:18:51,255 You're lying! I don't lie. 393 00:18:51,297 --> 00:18:53,257 Yeah, Sam may be obnoxious and irresponsible, 394 00:18:53,299 --> 00:18:54,592 but she doesn't lie. 395 00:18:55,676 --> 00:18:58,012 Oh, you know I love you. 396 00:18:58,054 --> 00:19:00,222 She says if you buy 10 boxes, you get a dollar off. 397 00:19:00,264 --> 00:19:01,975 I don't want any Girl Sprout cookies. 398 00:19:02,016 --> 00:19:03,307 She really doesn't want any cookies. 399 00:19:03,309 --> 00:19:05,603 Huh? 400 00:19:05,645 --> 00:19:07,605 Fine, I'll go ask Valerie myself. 401 00:19:07,647 --> 00:19:09,021 She's not gonna tell you the truth. 402 00:19:09,023 --> 00:19:11,609 She said no thank you. Valerie's using you. 403 00:19:11,651 --> 00:19:13,027 She is not. She is. 404 00:19:13,069 --> 00:19:17,115 We don't want your cookies! Believe us. 405 00:19:17,155 --> 00:19:19,073 We've been your friends way longer than she has. 406 00:19:19,075 --> 00:19:20,952 How many times do I have to say no?! 407 00:19:20,994 --> 00:19:22,787 Wait, how much for the Twin Mints? 408 00:19:22,829 --> 00:19:30,003 ♪ 409 00:19:30,044 --> 00:19:31,838 How long 'till we go on? Seven minutes. 410 00:19:31,879 --> 00:19:34,090 Where's Germy? In the bathroom. 411 00:19:34,132 --> 00:19:35,798 He brought special nose plugs that are supposed to keep snot 412 00:19:35,800 --> 00:19:37,259 from dripping out of his nostrils. 413 00:19:37,301 --> 00:19:39,637 Charming. 414 00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:42,598 Here he comes. 415 00:19:42,640 --> 00:19:44,642 Let's just get ready to do the show. 416 00:19:44,684 --> 00:19:48,354 Here I am. Whee. 417 00:19:48,395 --> 00:19:51,107 I put in the nose plugs. They should keep me from... 418 00:19:55,402 --> 00:19:56,696 Where did my right plug go? 419 00:20:02,368 --> 00:20:03,995 Don't! 420 00:20:04,037 --> 00:20:06,497 I'm... I'm sorry. 421 00:20:06,539 --> 00:20:08,248 I can't... 422 00:20:08,290 --> 00:20:09,625 I gotta go home. 423 00:20:19,301 --> 00:20:21,137 Now what? 424 00:20:21,179 --> 00:20:23,539 We can't do the show without someone doing the tech stuff. 425 00:20:31,064 --> 00:20:32,481 Hi. 426 00:20:32,523 --> 00:20:34,817 You were right. 427 00:20:34,859 --> 00:20:37,028 Valerie admitted she tried to steal me. 428 00:20:37,070 --> 00:20:40,907 Yeah, she even tried to get me to talk you into doing her show. 429 00:20:40,948 --> 00:20:44,160 You guys were right about her. She's a skunk sack. 430 00:20:44,202 --> 00:20:46,286 Bag. Bag. 431 00:20:46,328 --> 00:20:49,665 What did you do? Broke up with her. 432 00:20:49,707 --> 00:20:51,918 I'm sorry. That's cool. 433 00:20:57,006 --> 00:20:59,550 Well, come on! 434 00:20:59,592 --> 00:21:00,968 Let's do a but-kicking web show. 435 00:21:01,010 --> 00:21:03,054 That'll take your mind off of it. 436 00:21:03,096 --> 00:21:04,970 Look, I know we haven't rehearsed it with you... 437 00:21:04,972 --> 00:21:07,307 I didn't say I'd come back to iCarly. 438 00:21:07,349 --> 00:21:09,143 Yeah, but... You said Valerie... 439 00:21:09,185 --> 00:21:11,518 That doesn't mean that she was wrong when she said you guys 440 00:21:11,520 --> 00:21:13,145 don't treat me like I'm important to the show. 441 00:21:13,147 --> 00:21:15,733 I always tell you. Yeah, you do. 442 00:21:18,402 --> 00:21:21,279 Tell him he's just as important to the show as we are. 443 00:21:21,321 --> 00:21:24,282 Oh, why don't you just make me drink out of a toilet? 444 00:21:24,324 --> 00:21:25,743 Tell him! 445 00:21:32,458 --> 00:21:35,002 Freddie... 446 00:21:35,044 --> 00:21:37,255 you're just as important to iCarly as we are. 447 00:21:45,679 --> 00:21:47,014 She gave me a wedgie! 448 00:21:48,348 --> 00:21:50,517 No charge. Now come on, let's do the show! 449 00:21:50,559 --> 00:21:58,559 ♪ 450 00:22:00,820 --> 00:22:02,947 Hey! Hi, Spencer. 451 00:22:02,989 --> 00:22:06,117 You guys rocked tonight. You saw our show? 452 00:22:06,159 --> 00:22:08,199 Yeah, I watched it over at my buddy Socko's house. 453 00:22:08,202 --> 00:22:10,037 You have a friend named Socko? 454 00:22:10,079 --> 00:22:12,623 Yeah, he's the one who sells me all the cool socks. 455 00:22:16,294 --> 00:22:18,963 So I thought Freddie quit the... I'm back on iCarly. 456 00:22:19,005 --> 00:22:20,673 As our permanent technical producer. 457 00:22:20,714 --> 00:22:22,008 Good. 458 00:22:22,049 --> 00:22:24,177 Hey, so what's Valerie gonna do about her show? 459 00:22:24,218 --> 00:22:25,803 I think it's probably still on. 460 00:22:25,845 --> 00:22:27,085 Well, go to her site. Hurry! 461 00:22:27,096 --> 00:22:29,223 Okay, okay, calm down, I'm going. 462 00:22:29,265 --> 00:22:32,434 Um, so now if you'll look at the monitor above me, 463 00:22:32,476 --> 00:22:36,897 you will see, um, a video of my family's recent trip to Idaho, 464 00:22:36,939 --> 00:22:38,398 home of the potato. 465 00:22:41,527 --> 00:22:42,527 Why won't it play? 466 00:22:43,988 --> 00:22:45,348 I don't see why it's not playing. 467 00:22:47,616 --> 00:22:49,952 Is she okay? 468 00:22:49,994 --> 00:22:51,369 Yeah, yeah, she's getting up. 469 00:22:58,169 --> 00:23:00,546 I don't know what to do now. 470 00:23:00,587 --> 00:23:02,131 I do. 471 00:23:02,173 --> 00:23:04,424 ♪ 472 00:23:07,427 --> 00:23:10,430 Hey, people! We need you to do something. You have to do this. 473 00:23:10,472 --> 00:23:12,266 We want you to make a crazy sandwich. 474 00:23:12,308 --> 00:23:15,144 Make an insane sandwich! Then take a picture of it... 475 00:23:15,186 --> 00:23:17,271 and send that pic to us at iCarly.com. 476 00:23:17,313 --> 00:23:19,106 And if your sandwich is crazy enough... 477 00:23:19,148 --> 00:23:20,774 we'll put it on the iCarly homepage 478 00:23:20,816 --> 00:23:22,276 for the whole world to see. 479 00:23:22,318 --> 00:23:24,362 So if you want to win most insane sandwich ever... 480 00:23:24,402 --> 00:23:26,613 go make a bizarro sandwich... take a pic of it... 481 00:23:26,655 --> 00:23:28,782 and send that pic to us at iCarly.com. 482 00:23:28,824 --> 00:23:31,451 Do it! We want your sandwich pics! 483 00:23:31,493 --> 00:23:33,287 And now, Sam and I will make weird noises. 484 00:23:33,329 --> 00:23:34,330 Mah. Mah. 485 00:23:34,372 --> 00:23:36,957 Mmm!