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Previously on
The Big Bang Theory...
2
00:00:03,725 --> 00:00:06,540
My father thinks the reason
I can't make a relationship work
3
00:00:06,541 --> 00:00:08,041
is because I'm spoiled.
4
00:00:08,043 --> 00:00:09,843
All right, how much,
exactly, does he pay for?
5
00:00:11,947 --> 00:00:13,346
Okay, I'll tell you,
6
00:00:13,348 --> 00:00:14,981
but please don't judge me.
7
00:00:14,983 --> 00:00:18,718
He pays for my car,
my rent, and my credit cards.
8
00:00:21,056 --> 00:00:23,823
I'm trying, but I'm judging.
9
00:00:24,893 --> 00:00:27,360
Maybe your dad's right.
10
00:00:27,362 --> 00:00:29,662
Yeah, women do like a man
that can support himself.
11
00:00:29,664 --> 00:00:31,831
I have come to
an important decision.
12
00:00:31,833 --> 00:00:34,067
I will not be accepting
your money anymore.
13
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That's wonderful.
14
00:00:35,604 --> 00:00:37,370
Yes, that is wonderful.
You will no longer be able
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to accuse me of being spoiled.
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I'm so proud of you.
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00:00:41,109 --> 00:00:42,609
Dad, I'm trying to tell you off,
and you're ruining it
18
00:00:42,611 --> 00:00:45,779
with your delight and relief.
19
00:00:48,483 --> 00:00:50,150
Uh-huh.
20
00:00:52,487 --> 00:00:54,687
Interesting.
21
00:00:57,092 --> 00:00:58,725
Okay.
22
00:00:58,727 --> 00:00:59,893
How bad is it?
23
00:00:59,895 --> 00:01:00,860
Let me put it this way--
24
00:01:00,862 --> 00:01:04,330
do you own a barrel
and suspenders?
25
00:01:05,000 --> 00:01:06,433
Are you serious?
26
00:01:06,435 --> 00:01:09,769
I'm not wearing this visor
to play women's golf.
27
00:01:10,572 --> 00:01:12,005
- Hi.
- Hey.
28
00:01:12,007 --> 00:01:13,306
Oh, let me guess.
29
00:01:13,308 --> 00:01:16,376
You guys are drafting
your fantasy accounting firms.
30
00:01:18,180 --> 00:01:20,280
We're helping Raj
figure out his finances.
31
00:01:20,282 --> 00:01:22,415
Well, he has a job.
How bad can it be?
32
00:01:22,417 --> 00:01:24,918
Well, his rent and car lease
are exceedingly high.
33
00:01:24,920 --> 00:01:25,985
You couple that
with his penchant
34
00:01:25,987 --> 00:01:27,420
for dining out and shopping...
35
00:01:27,422 --> 00:01:29,189
Wait, wait, not shopping
for clothes, right?
36
00:01:29,191 --> 00:01:30,356
Because look.
37
00:01:33,061 --> 00:01:35,328
He also has a remarkable
amount of credit card debt.
38
00:01:35,330 --> 00:01:37,397
I thought your dad
paid your cards.
39
00:01:37,399 --> 00:01:40,300
I have a card for emergencies
that I pay for myself.
40
00:01:40,302 --> 00:01:42,635
What emergency happened
at the L.A. Zoo?
41
00:01:42,637 --> 00:01:44,871
That's a penguin I sponsor.
42
00:01:45,907 --> 00:01:47,640
They're losing their homes
to global warming,
43
00:01:47,642 --> 00:01:49,509
and my car gets, like,
seven miles a gallon,
44
00:01:49,511 --> 00:01:51,478
so I felt bad.
45
00:01:51,480 --> 00:01:53,947
What is Pink Cheeks?
46
00:01:53,949 --> 00:01:56,416
It's intimate waxing.
Quit looking at that!
47
00:01:58,220 --> 00:01:59,919
Maybe you should find someone
48
00:01:59,921 --> 00:02:02,322
to help you get your
finances under control.
49
00:02:02,324 --> 00:02:03,490
Like a business manager?
50
00:02:03,492 --> 00:02:05,024
No, absolutely not.
51
00:02:05,026 --> 00:02:06,593
You can't afford to hire someone
52
00:02:06,595 --> 00:02:07,927
who'll forbid you
from spending your money
53
00:02:07,929 --> 00:02:09,195
on foolish expenses.
54
00:02:09,197 --> 00:02:12,398
That is a foolish expense,
and I forbid it.
55
00:02:13,502 --> 00:02:17,136
What if there's someone
who just likes controlling
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00:02:17,138 --> 00:02:20,173
other people and stealing
joy from their lives?
57
00:02:20,175 --> 00:02:23,076
He sounds like a sociopath.
58
00:02:24,112 --> 00:02:26,546
We don't know,
his mother never had him tested.
59
00:02:29,718 --> 00:02:32,051
You're talking about me.
Very funny.
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00:02:32,053 --> 00:02:36,623
Although I would enjoy
drawing up a budget
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00:02:36,625 --> 00:02:38,558
and forcing Raj to adhere to it
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without an ounce of compassion.
63
00:02:40,595 --> 00:02:43,329
Wait, wait, who's gonna
break it to the penguin?
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00:02:44,366 --> 00:02:45,532
Okay, Sheldon.
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Yeah, I'm putting you
in charge of my finances.
66
00:02:48,103 --> 00:02:50,537
I will not spend another penny
that you don't authorize.
67
00:02:50,539 --> 00:02:52,038
Very well.
68
00:02:52,040 --> 00:02:54,374
Hey, Comic-Con tickets
go on sale this Friday.
69
00:02:54,376 --> 00:02:55,542
You can't buy one.
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00:02:58,096 --> 00:03:01,564
Oh, better luck next
time, Pink Cheeks.
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00:03:02,834 --> 00:03:06,469
♪ Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ♪
72
00:03:06,471 --> 00:03:09,806
♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ♪
73
00:03:09,808 --> 00:03:11,441
♪ The Earth began to cool ♪
74
00:03:11,443 --> 00:03:13,977
♪ The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ♪
75
00:03:13,979 --> 00:03:16,646
♪ We built the Wall ♪
♪ We built the pyramids ♪
76
00:03:16,648 --> 00:03:19,316
♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪
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00:03:19,318 --> 00:03:21,217
♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪
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♪ Bang! ♪
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♪ The Big Bang Theory 10x17 ♪
The Comic-Con Conundrum
Original Air Date on February 23, 2017
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00:03:26,289 --> 00:03:31,589
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man
81
00:03:31,640 --> 00:03:33,674
You're actually going
to Comic-Con?
82
00:03:33,676 --> 00:03:35,943
Well, Leonard wants me to do
more stuff like that with him,
83
00:03:35,945 --> 00:03:37,878
so I thought maybe
this year I'd tag along.
84
00:03:37,880 --> 00:03:39,947
Well, that's sweet.
I bet you'll have fun.
85
00:03:39,949 --> 00:03:41,014
So, do you want to come?
86
00:03:41,016 --> 00:03:42,582
No, thanks.
87
00:03:42,584 --> 00:03:46,086
I already live in a place
all the nerds come to.
88
00:03:46,088 --> 00:03:49,389
Please? I went to your
boring thing last month.
89
00:03:49,391 --> 00:03:53,393
My aunt's funeral?
90
00:03:53,395 --> 00:03:55,228
Come on, even you
checked your e-mail
91
00:03:55,230 --> 00:03:56,997
during the eulogy.
92
00:03:56,999 --> 00:03:59,099
Well, I'm not going,
93
00:03:59,101 --> 00:04:01,168
but I do think it's nice
you want to.
94
00:04:01,170 --> 00:04:02,936
It's not that I want to go,
95
00:04:02,938 --> 00:04:04,371
I just think
it'll make Leonard happy.
96
00:04:04,373 --> 00:04:05,472
And if I have
to watch him
97
00:04:05,474 --> 00:04:08,475
squeeze into an Ewok
costume, so be it.
98
00:04:08,477 --> 00:04:11,111
Look at you,
going to Comic-Con,
99
00:04:11,113 --> 00:04:12,279
talking about Ewoks.
100
00:04:12,281 --> 00:04:14,715
I really have become
the cool one around here.
101
00:04:17,419 --> 00:04:20,287
You actually think Penny
will have fun at Comic-Con?
102
00:04:20,289 --> 00:04:22,689
No. Which will
make me miserable,
103
00:04:22,691 --> 00:04:24,157
which is usually
Sheldon's job.
104
00:04:26,962 --> 00:04:29,029
She's gonna hate waiting
in line for the panels.
105
00:04:29,031 --> 00:04:30,998
She's gonna hate all
the crowds at the panels.
106
00:04:31,000 --> 00:04:33,734
She's gonna hate
the panels.
107
00:04:33,736 --> 00:04:37,337
She's gonna hate how often
we say the word "panels."
108
00:04:37,339 --> 00:04:39,172
Why don't you just
tell her not to come?
109
00:04:39,174 --> 00:04:41,541
Well, she's so excited,
I can't do that to her.
110
00:04:41,543 --> 00:04:43,143
What if you make it sound so bad
111
00:04:43,145 --> 00:04:44,478
she won't want to go?
112
00:04:44,480 --> 00:04:47,247
That I would do to her.
113
00:04:48,550 --> 00:04:50,083
I can't believe Penny's
gonna get to go,
114
00:04:50,085 --> 00:04:51,084
and I'm not.
115
00:04:51,086 --> 00:04:53,286
You can always watch
the panels online.
116
00:04:53,288 --> 00:04:55,689
Oh, boy, we do
say that a lot.
117
00:04:56,525 --> 00:04:57,924
Panels.
118
00:05:00,796 --> 00:05:03,997
Just wanted to be included.
119
00:05:07,036 --> 00:05:08,568
Come on, Sheldon,
it's Comic-Con.
120
00:05:08,570 --> 00:05:09,836
Just let me have
the money for this,
121
00:05:09,838 --> 00:05:11,405
and I won't ask
for anything else.
122
00:05:11,407 --> 00:05:13,440
You put me in charge
of your finances.
123
00:05:13,442 --> 00:05:15,042
If you wanted someone
weak and spineless
124
00:05:15,044 --> 00:05:17,204
you could walk all over,
you should have asked Leonard.
125
00:05:18,747 --> 00:05:21,681
See? Miserable.
126
00:05:21,683 --> 00:05:23,683
Okay, you're right,
I got myself into this,
127
00:05:23,685 --> 00:05:25,652
but I've never missed
a Comic-Con with you guys.
128
00:05:25,654 --> 00:05:27,921
Your father may have
spoiled you, but I won't.
129
00:05:27,923 --> 00:05:29,356
If you want a ticket
to Comic-Con,
130
00:05:29,358 --> 00:05:31,558
I suggest you figure out a way
to earn the money yourself.
131
00:05:31,560 --> 00:05:34,428
Yeah, you're a grown man
who's highly educated.
132
00:05:34,430 --> 00:05:37,931
You could charge people
money to punch you.
133
00:05:39,868 --> 00:05:41,835
Go ahead, make jokes.
I don't know why you think
134
00:05:41,837 --> 00:05:43,804
you're going to Comic-Con--
you just had a baby.
135
00:05:43,806 --> 00:05:45,806
So?
Well, so?
136
00:05:45,808 --> 00:05:47,841
So you think Bernadette's
just gonna let you jet
137
00:05:47,843 --> 00:05:49,609
down to San Diego
for five days
138
00:05:49,611 --> 00:05:50,977
and leave her alone?
139
00:05:50,979 --> 00:05:52,179
Hang-hang on.
140
00:05:52,181 --> 00:05:54,781
So I have to bring Penny,
you can't afford it,
141
00:05:54,783 --> 00:05:55,816
Howard's gonna get in trouble,
142
00:05:55,818 --> 00:05:59,352
and this guy gets
to have a great time.
143
00:05:59,354 --> 00:06:01,021
I'm gonna go as Dumbledore.
144
00:06:04,259 --> 00:06:06,660
Mm...
145
00:06:06,662 --> 00:06:07,727
how's my favorite girl?
146
00:06:07,729 --> 00:06:08,795
Okay.
147
00:06:08,797 --> 00:06:11,531
What you doing?
Making lasagna.
148
00:06:11,533 --> 00:06:14,434
Oh, she's sexy, she can cook.
149
00:06:14,436 --> 00:06:16,136
I'm such a lucky guy.
150
00:06:16,138 --> 00:06:20,440
You want something stupid,
or you did something stupid?
151
00:06:20,442 --> 00:06:23,577
No. I just walked in here,
saw how beautiful you are
152
00:06:23,579 --> 00:06:25,679
and had to tell you.
153
00:06:25,681 --> 00:06:29,049
Oh, dear God, you're
cheating on me with Raj.
154
00:06:29,051 --> 00:06:31,685
Never gets old.
155
00:06:34,790 --> 00:06:36,389
Okay, there is
something I want,
156
00:06:36,391 --> 00:06:37,591
but it's not a big deal.
157
00:06:37,593 --> 00:06:39,359
What is it?
158
00:06:39,361 --> 00:06:41,161
Well, Comic-Con tickets
go on sale this Friday,
159
00:06:41,163 --> 00:06:42,596
and I was hoping
I could go with the guys.
160
00:06:42,598 --> 00:06:44,598
But before you say anything,
I'll make up for being gone
161
00:06:44,600 --> 00:06:47,434
by doing everything around
here-- I mean everything.
162
00:06:47,436 --> 00:06:48,568
I'm even gonna
answer for you.
163
00:06:48,570 --> 00:06:51,071
Yes, Howard, you can go.
164
00:06:51,073 --> 00:06:53,907
It's so hard to
say no to you.
165
00:06:53,909 --> 00:06:55,942
Thank you.
166
00:06:56,812 --> 00:06:59,246
So I'll say maybe.
167
00:06:59,248 --> 00:07:01,348
What? Why?
168
00:07:01,350 --> 00:07:03,617
You said tickets don't go
on sale till Friday, right?
169
00:07:03,619 --> 00:07:04,951
Yeah.
170
00:07:04,953 --> 00:07:07,487
You said you were gonna do
all this stuff for me, right?
171
00:07:07,489 --> 00:07:10,657
Yeah.
172
00:07:12,394 --> 00:07:15,061
See where I'm going with this?
173
00:07:16,798 --> 00:07:19,366
Yeah.
174
00:07:20,602 --> 00:07:23,103
If you don't know how
to make lasagna, Google does.
175
00:07:26,608 --> 00:07:30,443
Okay, so this is the
main Comic-Con floor.
176
00:07:30,445 --> 00:07:32,879
It's where all the
vendors and exhibits are.
177
00:07:32,881 --> 00:07:35,649
Wow, that is a lot
of people jammed in there.
178
00:07:35,651 --> 00:07:38,685
I know. Sometimes Howard
wears a striped shirt
179
00:07:38,687 --> 00:07:41,421
so we can play
"Where's Wolowitz?"
180
00:07:43,992 --> 00:07:46,960
Okay, now, Th-this is us
camping out in line
181
00:07:46,962 --> 00:07:48,395
for the Avengers panel.
182
00:07:48,397 --> 00:07:50,463
Oh, you really sleep
on the sidewalk, huh?
183
00:07:50,465 --> 00:07:51,498
Yeah.
184
00:07:51,500 --> 00:07:54,968
It can get chilly,
but Raj figured out
185
00:07:54,970 --> 00:07:56,203
that if you pee
in a bottle
186
00:07:56,205 --> 00:07:57,337
and put it in your
sleeping bag,
187
00:07:57,339 --> 00:07:59,573
it helps keep you warm.
188
00:08:01,143 --> 00:08:03,810
Here's the hotel room
we all share.
189
00:08:03,812 --> 00:08:05,812
Well, you and I would
get our own room, right?
190
00:08:05,814 --> 00:08:07,747
Every hotel is booked.
191
00:08:07,749 --> 00:08:09,516
But, yeah, see
this space here
192
00:08:09,518 --> 00:08:11,418
between Sheldon's
feet and my head?
193
00:08:11,420 --> 00:08:13,587
That's where you go.
194
00:08:13,589 --> 00:08:15,622
Well, it's no different
than when Sheldon
195
00:08:15,624 --> 00:08:19,759
used to climb in bed with us
during a thunderstorm.
196
00:08:19,761 --> 00:08:22,128
Don't worry, we won't be
doing much sleeping anyway.
197
00:08:22,130 --> 00:08:23,930
It's like an
all-night party.
198
00:08:23,932 --> 00:08:27,000
There's trivia contests
and Dungeons & Dragons.
199
00:08:27,002 --> 00:08:31,037
As we like to say, it's
"off the chain mail."
200
00:08:32,007 --> 00:08:34,441
I even said
"off the chain mail,"
201
00:08:34,443 --> 00:08:35,909
and she still wants to go.
202
00:08:37,346 --> 00:08:39,179
That's probably
my fault.
203
00:08:39,181 --> 00:08:42,015
She may have heard about
my cool Dumbledore costume.
204
00:08:43,218 --> 00:08:45,552
Okay, I can give you
20 bucks for the whole box.
205
00:08:45,554 --> 00:08:48,488
But you charged me
hundreds for this stuff.
206
00:08:48,490 --> 00:08:52,259
I know. And I did it
with a straight face.
207
00:08:52,261 --> 00:08:55,128
But I need to earn
enough money
208
00:08:55,130 --> 00:08:56,963
so I can go to Comic-Con.
209
00:08:56,965 --> 00:09:00,600
Well... all right.
210
00:09:00,602 --> 00:09:02,602
I'll give you 25 bucks.
211
00:09:02,604 --> 00:09:03,737
That's my best offer.
212
00:09:03,739 --> 00:09:05,905
I have no choice.
213
00:09:05,907 --> 00:09:07,641
You know, if you want
to make extra money,
214
00:09:07,643 --> 00:09:09,409
I-I could throw
some work your way.
215
00:09:09,411 --> 00:09:10,710
Really?
I'll do anything.
216
00:09:10,712 --> 00:09:11,811
Great, you're hired.
217
00:09:11,813 --> 00:09:13,713
First thing you can do is
put price tags on these.
218
00:09:13,715 --> 00:09:16,383
Start the little ones at $50.
219
00:09:19,187 --> 00:09:20,453
You know, it's no big deal.
220
00:09:20,455 --> 00:09:22,656
I can put up with
anything for three days.
221
00:09:22,658 --> 00:09:23,790
Comic-Con's five days.
222
00:09:23,792 --> 00:09:25,725
Are you kidding me?
223
00:09:27,963 --> 00:09:29,429
Why don't you just tell him
you don't want to go?
224
00:09:29,431 --> 00:09:31,531
I can't, it'll
break his heart.
225
00:09:31,533 --> 00:09:32,599
You know, he's always
making an effort
226
00:09:32,601 --> 00:09:34,668
to do things with me
he doesn't enjoy,
227
00:09:34,670 --> 00:09:37,470
like going outside.
228
00:09:37,472 --> 00:09:39,606
He is an indoor cat.
229
00:09:39,608 --> 00:09:42,008
You know, maybe it
won't be that bad.
230
00:09:42,010 --> 00:09:43,910
Leonard says it's
really mainstream now.
231
00:09:43,912 --> 00:09:46,479
Comic books aren't
just for sad nerds anymore.
232
00:10:01,997 --> 00:10:05,265
I mean, it is still a key
part of their demographic.
233
00:10:16,300 --> 00:10:18,366
Howie, can you get that?
234
00:10:18,368 --> 00:10:20,302
Kind of busy.
235
00:10:20,304 --> 00:10:22,270
Busy like I'll be with the baby
236
00:10:22,272 --> 00:10:23,738
if you go to San Diego?
237
00:10:26,777 --> 00:10:30,045
Hey.
238
00:10:30,047 --> 00:10:31,313
What's with the gloves?
239
00:10:31,315 --> 00:10:34,215
They complete my ensemble.
What do you want?
240
00:10:34,217 --> 00:10:36,751
I'm looking to make extra money
241
00:10:36,753 --> 00:10:39,154
and was wondering if you had
any chores I could do.
242
00:10:39,156 --> 00:10:40,789
Hang on.
243
00:10:40,791 --> 00:10:45,860
Bernie, can I outsource my
chores to an Indian guy?
244
00:10:45,862 --> 00:10:48,596
No.
245
00:10:48,598 --> 00:10:50,999
I tried.
246
00:10:54,004 --> 00:10:55,603
Hey, I was thinking,
247
00:10:55,605 --> 00:10:57,605
if you want to do
a couples costume,
248
00:10:57,607 --> 00:11:00,508
we could paint ourselves green
and be Hulk and She-Hulk.
249
00:11:00,510 --> 00:11:02,377
Or we could paint ourselves blue
250
00:11:02,379 --> 00:11:05,280
and go as Nightcrawler
and Mystique.
251
00:11:05,282 --> 00:11:08,883
Is there any scenario where
we're not in full body paint?
252
00:11:08,885 --> 00:11:13,254
Yeah, if you want us
to look like losers.
253
00:11:13,256 --> 00:11:16,157
Hey, um, are you sure the guys
are okay with me coming?
254
00:11:16,159 --> 00:11:17,625
Yeah, of course, why?
255
00:11:17,627 --> 00:11:19,861
This is just something
you usually do together,
256
00:11:19,863 --> 00:11:22,063
and if I'm screwing it up,
I don't have to go.
257
00:11:22,065 --> 00:11:26,267
Oh, why? Do you not want to go?
258
00:11:26,269 --> 00:11:29,938
Why? Do you not want me to go?
259
00:11:31,208 --> 00:11:33,808
No, I want you to go.
260
00:11:35,178 --> 00:11:38,947
Okay, good, 'cause that's
what I want, too.
261
00:11:42,786 --> 00:11:46,788
Now we're going
as Hulk and She-Hulk.
262
00:11:48,125 --> 00:11:51,393
I don't want to take
my shirt off at Comic-Con.
263
00:11:51,395 --> 00:11:55,130
If I may speak for Comic-Con,
we don't want that either.
264
00:11:55,132 --> 00:11:56,664
Is that nice?
265
00:11:56,666 --> 00:11:59,167
No, but it's honest,
and it sounds like you could use
266
00:11:59,169 --> 00:12:01,002
a little more honesty
in your relationship.
267
00:12:01,004 --> 00:12:03,438
Uh, i-it's more
complicated than that.
268
00:12:03,440 --> 00:12:05,340
I'm always honest with Amy.
269
00:12:05,342 --> 00:12:07,275
The other day she said
she was self-conscious
270
00:12:07,277 --> 00:12:08,710
about the beauty mark
on her shoulder,
271
00:12:08,712 --> 00:12:10,278
and I said, "You know,
272
00:12:10,280 --> 00:12:11,980
"you can call that
a beauty mark all you want.
273
00:12:11,982 --> 00:12:14,349
When there's hair growing
out of it, that's a mole."
274
00:12:16,119 --> 00:12:18,486
Do you think
she's as honest with you?
275
00:12:18,488 --> 00:12:20,021
I should hope so.
276
00:12:20,023 --> 00:12:21,923
When she called me
an insensitive jerk,
277
00:12:21,925 --> 00:12:24,559
I'd like to think she meant it.
278
00:12:26,730 --> 00:12:29,731
There's got to be other ways
you can make a quick buck.
279
00:12:29,733 --> 00:12:30,865
Yeah, you'd think.
280
00:12:30,867 --> 00:12:34,102
Ooh, maybe I could sell
my blood and sperm.
281
00:12:37,274 --> 00:12:39,007
I really should wear
a bell around my neck
282
00:12:39,009 --> 00:12:41,009
so you guys can hear me coming.
283
00:12:41,011 --> 00:12:42,844
Here, let me help you.
284
00:12:42,846 --> 00:12:44,446
Thank you.
285
00:12:44,448 --> 00:12:45,713
Oh, Double Stuf Oreos,
286
00:12:45,715 --> 00:12:48,082
I remember when
I could afford you.
287
00:12:49,352 --> 00:12:50,685
There she goes.
288
00:12:50,687 --> 00:12:52,220
Stay, I'll get her.
289
00:12:52,222 --> 00:12:53,688
Appreciate it.
That's fine.
290
00:12:53,690 --> 00:12:56,257
She and I can cry together.
291
00:12:56,259 --> 00:12:58,326
He's such a sweetie.
292
00:12:58,328 --> 00:13:01,896
I know, I wish there was
some way we could help him.
293
00:13:01,898 --> 00:13:03,698
If he could find a
girl with a good job,
294
00:13:03,700 --> 00:13:05,333
all his problems
would be over.
295
00:13:05,335 --> 00:13:07,769
Yeah, that's working out
great for me.
296
00:13:11,508 --> 00:13:13,675
Penny says they're ready to go.
297
00:13:13,677 --> 00:13:14,742
Very well.
298
00:13:14,744 --> 00:13:17,645
Prepare for a long night
of deceit.
299
00:13:17,647 --> 00:13:23,284
Sheldon, women can wear makeup,
it's not lying.
300
00:13:23,286 --> 00:13:25,687
I was talking about Leonard.
301
00:13:25,689 --> 00:13:26,754
And if makeup is
302
00:13:26,756 --> 00:13:27,755
so truthful,
303
00:13:27,757 --> 00:13:29,290
why is it called "concealer"?
304
00:13:30,861 --> 00:13:32,994
Wait, wait, wait,
what's Leonard lying about?
305
00:13:32,996 --> 00:13:35,063
He doesn't really want Penny
to go to Comic-Con.
306
00:13:35,065 --> 00:13:36,498
He's just doing it
to make her happy.
307
00:13:36,500 --> 00:13:38,299
Really?
308
00:13:38,301 --> 00:13:40,435
Because she doesn't
actually want to go.
309
00:13:40,437 --> 00:13:42,570
She's just doing it
to make him happy.
310
00:13:42,572 --> 00:13:44,806
So they're both trying
to make each other happy,
311
00:13:44,808 --> 00:13:48,643
and the end result
is they make each other sad?
312
00:13:48,645 --> 00:13:50,745
That's hilarious.
313
00:13:52,349 --> 00:13:54,349
I can't wait to tell them.
314
00:13:54,351 --> 00:13:56,818
No, you're not gonna
tell them anything.
315
00:13:56,820 --> 00:13:58,086
You're gonna
stay out of it.
316
00:13:58,088 --> 00:13:59,153
Why?
317
00:13:59,155 --> 00:14:00,788
Because it's between them.
318
00:14:00,790 --> 00:14:02,123
Well, if you haven't noticed,
319
00:14:02,125 --> 00:14:05,760
I've been between them
for the last ten years.
320
00:14:07,230 --> 00:14:08,796
- Hey. - Hello.
- Hi.
321
00:14:08,798 --> 00:14:09,864
Hey, babe, you
want to drive?
322
00:14:09,866 --> 00:14:11,266
Sure, or you can.
323
00:14:11,268 --> 00:14:13,234
No, it's fine, I know you
don't like the way I drive.
324
00:14:13,236 --> 00:14:15,336
I don't have a problem
with your driving.
325
00:14:15,338 --> 00:14:16,804
Are you listening to this?
326
00:14:16,806 --> 00:14:18,606
They deceive each other
about everything.
327
00:14:18,608 --> 00:14:21,242
Shh.
328
00:14:21,244 --> 00:14:25,680
Just so you know, that guy
in the parking lot hit me.
329
00:14:25,682 --> 00:14:28,516
He wasn't in a car, but okay.
330
00:14:30,287 --> 00:14:32,086
Just say you want to drive.
331
00:14:32,088 --> 00:14:33,888
I honestly don't.
332
00:14:36,726 --> 00:14:39,193
Amy, do us a favor,
please drive.
333
00:14:39,195 --> 00:14:41,262
Sure, happy to.
334
00:14:41,264 --> 00:14:42,764
If you want to drive,
just drive.
335
00:14:42,766 --> 00:14:44,666
I don't see why this has
to be so complicated.
336
00:14:44,668 --> 00:14:46,701
It's not complicated.
Amy's driving, that's it!
337
00:14:46,703 --> 00:14:48,570
That's not it because
you're clearly upset.
338
00:14:48,572 --> 00:14:50,371
You're the one
who seems upset.
339
00:14:50,373 --> 00:14:51,606
Why would I be upset?
340
00:14:51,608 --> 00:14:53,908
Because you don't want
her to go to Comic-Con!
341
00:14:56,379 --> 00:15:00,181
This is an interesting way
to stay out of it.
342
00:15:00,183 --> 00:15:03,651
Wait, you don't
want me to go?
343
00:15:03,653 --> 00:15:06,354
Well, I just don't think
you're gonna have a good time.
344
00:15:06,356 --> 00:15:07,455
Yeah, well, get this:
345
00:15:07,457 --> 00:15:08,523
neither does Penny,
346
00:15:08,525 --> 00:15:10,191
that's why she
doesn't want to go.
347
00:15:11,461 --> 00:15:15,263
You set 'em up,
I knock 'em down, good job.
348
00:15:15,265 --> 00:15:17,999
Why would you say you wanted
to go if you didn't?
349
00:15:18,001 --> 00:15:19,701
I just thought it
would make you happy.
350
00:15:19,703 --> 00:15:23,438
O-O-O-Okay, hold on,
so if you don't want to go
351
00:15:23,440 --> 00:15:26,908
and I don't need to bring you,
is everything good?
352
00:15:26,910 --> 00:15:30,612
Hold on, I'm trying to
decide if I'm mad at you.
353
00:15:31,715 --> 00:15:34,282
No, I'm happy I
don't have to go.
354
00:15:34,284 --> 00:15:35,750
All right, problem solved.
355
00:15:35,752 --> 00:15:36,684
Okay.
356
00:15:36,686 --> 00:15:38,720
Yeah.
Not entirely,
357
00:15:38,722 --> 00:15:40,188
the fight over who's going
to drive is still...
358
00:15:40,190 --> 00:15:42,056
Oh, my God, stop talking!
359
00:15:44,194 --> 00:15:45,526
The place looks great.
360
00:15:45,528 --> 00:15:46,661
Did you guys get a maid?
361
00:15:46,663 --> 00:15:48,696
Kind of.
362
00:15:48,698 --> 00:15:50,698
Dinner's almost ready.
363
00:15:50,700 --> 00:15:54,402
If you like meatloaf, I'm
sure you'll like its cousin,
364
00:15:54,404 --> 00:15:56,804
bowl of meat.
365
00:15:57,841 --> 00:15:59,841
Hey, if you're still
looking to make money,
366
00:15:59,843 --> 00:16:03,344
I will pay you
to burn that jacket.
367
00:16:03,346 --> 00:16:06,714
Thank you,
but it doesn't look like
368
00:16:06,716 --> 00:16:08,383
I'm going to Comic-Con
this year.
369
00:16:08,385 --> 00:16:10,218
Well, with as much
debt as you have,
370
00:16:10,220 --> 00:16:12,320
probably not
next year either.
371
00:16:13,556 --> 00:16:15,690
Howie?
Sure.
372
00:16:15,692 --> 00:16:17,558
This is for you.
373
00:16:17,560 --> 00:16:20,094
What's this?
374
00:16:20,096 --> 00:16:22,163
It's back pay
for all the babysitting
375
00:16:22,165 --> 00:16:23,965
and taking care of Halley
you've done.
376
00:16:23,967 --> 00:16:25,133
There's more than enough
377
00:16:25,135 --> 00:16:27,268
in there to cover Comic-Con.
378
00:16:27,270 --> 00:16:30,905
Um, I also take
care of Halley.
379
00:16:32,342 --> 00:16:33,875
And you live here for free.
380
00:16:33,877 --> 00:16:36,878
I do, ma'am, thank you, ma'am.
381
00:16:38,314 --> 00:16:41,282
This is so generous of you, I-I,
um, I don't know what to say.
382
00:16:41,284 --> 00:16:42,650
Now you can come with us.
383
00:16:42,652 --> 00:16:45,286
Yeah, there's room in the
bed by Sheldon's feet.
384
00:16:46,156 --> 00:16:48,556
As much as I appreciate this,
385
00:16:48,558 --> 00:16:49,557
I can't accept it.
386
00:16:49,559 --> 00:16:50,825
Okay?
387
00:16:50,827 --> 00:16:51,726
Halley's my goddaughter,
388
00:16:51,728 --> 00:16:53,327
I don't take care of her
for money.
389
00:16:53,329 --> 00:16:55,596
I would.
390
00:16:57,867 --> 00:17:00,068
Keep it.
Consider it a gift.
391
00:17:00,070 --> 00:17:01,169
Hold on.
392
00:17:01,171 --> 00:17:03,004
Is it back pay or is it a gift?
393
00:17:03,006 --> 00:17:04,038
What's the difference?
394
00:17:04,040 --> 00:17:06,074
When the IRS questions us
in separate rooms,
395
00:17:06,076 --> 00:17:07,575
we need to have
our stories straight.
396
00:17:07,577 --> 00:17:09,310
It doesn't matter.
397
00:17:09,312 --> 00:17:11,345
I'm not keeping this.
398
00:17:11,347 --> 00:17:13,681
I'm trying to pay my own
way and be responsible.
399
00:17:13,683 --> 00:17:14,782
Taking handouts won't help that.
400
00:17:14,784 --> 00:17:16,684
So you're not going
to Comic-Con?
401
00:17:16,686 --> 00:17:19,253
I've been plenty of times.
402
00:17:19,255 --> 00:17:21,856
If I miss one, it's fine.
I'm a big boy.
403
00:17:21,858 --> 00:17:24,425
I'm a big boy,
and if I missed one,
404
00:17:24,427 --> 00:17:27,295
I'd throw a big-boy tantrum.
405
00:17:28,498 --> 00:17:30,998
You know what?
I've gone 12 times.
406
00:17:31,000 --> 00:17:32,800
Maybe I'll sit out
this year, too.
407
00:17:32,802 --> 00:17:34,168
Really?
Yeah.
408
00:17:34,170 --> 00:17:36,237
Maybe you and I can do
something fun that weekend.
409
00:17:36,239 --> 00:17:39,006
Ooh, how about
white-water rafting?
410
00:17:39,008 --> 00:17:40,975
Oh... how about
we compromise
411
00:17:40,977 --> 00:17:44,145
and go on the Small World ride
at Disneyland?
412
00:17:45,982 --> 00:17:48,216
You know what, I'm
not gonna go either.
413
00:17:48,218 --> 00:17:50,118
I'm a father now.
414
00:17:50,120 --> 00:17:53,187
I'd rather spend time
with my family.
415
00:17:53,189 --> 00:17:54,789
You just don't want
to go alone with Sheldon.
416
00:17:54,791 --> 00:17:56,657
I'm gonna go check on dinner.
417
00:17:59,329 --> 00:18:01,162
Sounds like everyone's
staying home.
418
00:18:01,164 --> 00:18:02,363
What do you say?
419
00:18:02,365 --> 00:18:05,333
Nuts to that,
I'm going to Comic-Con!
420
00:18:05,335 --> 00:18:07,935
By yourself?
421
00:18:07,937 --> 00:18:09,303
Not necessarily.
422
00:18:09,305 --> 00:18:11,906
I have four months
to find some new friends.
423
00:18:11,908 --> 00:18:13,674
I'll go with you.
424
00:18:13,676 --> 00:18:15,176
That's very kind of you, Stuart.
425
00:18:15,178 --> 00:18:17,812
Check back in
with me in July.
426
00:18:27,805 --> 00:18:31,039
There's my pretty
girlfriend.
427
00:18:33,277 --> 00:18:35,811
I'm not going with you
to Comic-Con.
428
00:18:35,813 --> 00:18:39,347
What? Can't a man just be
happy to see his woman
429
00:18:39,349 --> 00:18:43,485
and pat her on her second most
erogenous ball-and-socket joint?
430
00:18:46,256 --> 00:18:49,324
He can, but it's still
not changing my mind.
431
00:18:50,928 --> 00:18:54,596
Well, maybe what's in my
pants will change your mind.
432
00:18:58,202 --> 00:19:01,436
It's a list of this
year's panelists.
433
00:19:05,532 --> 00:19:07,132
It's long, isn't it?
434
00:19:07,134 --> 00:19:13,934
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man