1
00:00:04,093 --> 00:00:05,085
Morning.
2
00:00:05,663 --> 00:00:06,863
Morning.
3
00:00:07,823 --> 00:00:09,858
- Sleep okay?
- Um uh. Great!
4
00:00:12,283 --> 00:00:13,856
Hey, can I ask you something?
5
00:00:13,881 --> 00:00:15,081
Sure.
6
00:00:15,300 --> 00:00:18,041
Last night, me wanting to try
that stuff out of the Kama Sutra.
7
00:00:18,432 --> 00:00:21,011
Was that fun for you
or kinda racially insensitive?
8
00:00:22,179 --> 00:00:24,803
Yes. Just because you're in bed
with an India woman
9
00:00:24,828 --> 00:00:26,276
you think that gives you permission
10
00:00:26,301 --> 00:00:29,395
to use crazy positions
from an ancient Indian love manual?
11
00:00:30,039 --> 00:00:33,037
Hey, if you can find a book
called "Weird Sex with White Boys"
12
00:00:33,062 --> 00:00:34,316
I'd be okay with that.
13
00:00:36,773 --> 00:00:39,522
No, no, you know you have such
beautiful eyes.
14
00:00:40,392 --> 00:00:41,748
Have you ever thought about
getting contacts?
15
00:00:41,773 --> 00:00:44,654
I tried in the seventh grade.
I could never get used to them.
16
00:00:44,679 --> 00:00:45,879
Oh. That's too bad.
17
00:00:45,904 --> 00:00:48,608
Yeah. If I had contacts,
I would have been the coolest
18
00:00:48,633 --> 00:00:51,641
Debate Club president ever to be
stuffed into his own cello case.
19
00:00:53,899 --> 00:00:57,618
If you had them on now, you could
see what we're going to do next.
20
00:01:00,988 --> 00:01:03,094
That-That's okay.
I can infer from context.
21
00:01:06,320 --> 00:01:08,269
Hey, Raj, you wanna see a new
magic trick I been working on?
22
00:01:08,294 --> 00:01:09,494
Eh, Howard.
23
00:01:09,519 --> 00:01:12,587
If I may interject here
with a piece of friendly advice.
24
00:01:12,612 --> 00:01:16,426
Is working on magic tricks, really
how you want to spend your time?
25
00:01:17,141 --> 00:01:20,234
Uh, granted,
you're just an engineer, but...
26
00:01:21,200 --> 00:01:24,712
that doesn't mean you might
not someday build a geegaw
27
00:01:24,737 --> 00:01:25,937
or a thingamabob that
28
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that may get you a "thank you" in someone
else's Nobel Prize acceptance speech.
29
00:01:35,330 --> 00:01:37,374
Is the trick making him disappear?
30
00:01:39,829 --> 00:01:41,029
Sure, let's see it.
31
00:01:42,149 --> 00:01:43,930
Here.
Shuffle these.
32
00:01:43,955 --> 00:01:45,155
Okay.
33
00:01:46,395 --> 00:01:48,185
Now spread them out on the table.
Face down.
34
00:01:48,811 --> 00:01:50,179
Pick one.
Look at it.
35
00:01:50,204 --> 00:01:51,404
Okay.
36
00:01:51,429 --> 00:01:53,397
Now remember your card.
Put it back in the deck.
37
00:01:53,422 --> 00:01:55,327
Is it any wonder
he doesn't have a doctorate?
38
00:01:57,551 --> 00:01:59,277
Now remind me,
what's your birthday?
39
00:01:59,302 --> 00:02:00,502
October sixth.
40
00:02:01,075 --> 00:02:03,947
Okay, October is the tenth month.
41
00:02:03,972 --> 00:02:08,508
So 10-- one plus zero
is one plus six is seven.
42
00:02:08,533 --> 00:02:09,733
Turn over the seventh card.
43
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How about that!
44
00:02:14,612 --> 00:02:15,812
But, is that your card?
45
00:02:15,837 --> 00:02:17,316
Yes. It is.
Very cool!
46
00:02:19,435 --> 00:02:21,035
Oh it's not cool.
47
00:02:21,068 --> 00:02:25,932
It's a childish trick, designed
to confuse and intrigue simpletons.
48
00:02:26,946 --> 00:02:28,146
How'd you do it?
49
00:02:28,992 --> 00:02:31,203
A magician never reveals his secrets.
50
00:02:31,228 --> 00:02:34,048
But surely a future
Nobel Prize winner can figure it out.
51
00:02:36,495 --> 00:02:37,495
Fine.
52
00:02:37,520 --> 00:02:38,720
Give me a second.
53
00:02:42,437 --> 00:02:45,761
You ever notice when he thinks
real hard it smells like bacon?
54
00:02:49,600 --> 00:02:50,800
- Oh hey!
- Sorry! Oop!
55
00:02:50,825 --> 00:02:52,825
Sorry! Pardon me!
56
00:02:52,850 --> 00:02:54,250
Oh, I'm so sorry!
57
00:02:54,275 --> 00:02:55,475
Oh, that was my fault.
58
00:02:59,070 --> 00:03:01,660
Check it out.
I just got contacts.
59
00:03:05,154 --> 00:03:08,773
♪ Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ♪
60
00:03:08,774 --> 00:03:12,109
♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ♪
61
00:03:12,110 --> 00:03:13,744
♪ The Earth began to cool ♪
62
00:03:13,745 --> 00:03:16,280
♪ The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ♪
63
00:03:16,281 --> 00:03:18,966
♪ We built the Wall ♪
♪ We built the pyramids ♪
64
00:03:18,967 --> 00:03:21,602
♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪
65
00:03:21,603 --> 00:03:23,538
♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪
66
00:03:23,539 --> 00:03:24,518
♪ Bang! ♪
67
00:03:24,531 --> 00:03:28,031
♪ The Big Bang Theory 4x18 ♪
The Prestidigitation Approximation
Original Air Date on March 10, 2011
68
00:03:28,056 --> 00:03:31,556
-- sync, corrected by elderman --
69
00:03:31,717 --> 00:03:33,502
One, two,
70
00:03:33,572 --> 00:03:36,040
three, four, five.
71
00:03:36,041 --> 00:03:36,891
No way.
72
00:03:36,892 --> 00:03:37,875
That's your card, right?
73
00:03:37,876 --> 00:03:39,376
Seven of clubs!
74
00:03:39,377 --> 00:03:40,744
That is amazing!
75
00:03:40,745 --> 00:03:44,081
It's not amazing.
76
00:03:45,717 --> 00:03:47,718
All magic tricks are merely
a combination
77
00:03:47,719 --> 00:03:49,420
of manipulation
and misdirection
78
00:03:49,421 --> 00:03:54,057
with the occasional dwarf in
a box wiggling his feet.
79
00:03:54,960 --> 00:03:57,027
Oh, really?
So how did I do it?
80
00:03:57,028 --> 00:03:58,629
I don't care how you did it.
81
00:03:58,630 --> 00:04:02,399
I have more important things
to think about.
82
00:04:06,037 --> 00:04:09,273
Clearly, the cards
are marked.
83
00:04:09,274 --> 00:04:11,642
I thought you had more important
things to think about.
84
00:04:11,643 --> 00:04:13,410
I do.
You just happened
85
00:04:13,411 --> 00:04:15,312
to have caught me
on a break.
86
00:04:16,748 --> 00:04:20,050
Oh, let me see
those cards.
87
00:04:20,051 --> 00:04:21,385
Big deal. Not knowing
88
00:04:21,386 --> 00:04:22,920
is part of the fun.
89
00:04:22,921 --> 00:04:24,788
"Not knowing is part
of the fun."
90
00:04:24,789 --> 00:04:26,757
Was that the motto
of your community college?
91
00:04:28,860 --> 00:04:31,228
Hey, guys,
what do you think?
92
00:04:31,229 --> 00:04:32,696
Priya took me
clothes shopping.
93
00:04:32,697 --> 00:04:33,914
Hey, you look great.
94
00:04:33,915 --> 00:04:35,065
Good for you, Priya.
95
00:04:35,066 --> 00:04:37,034
I could never get that stupid
hoodie off him
96
00:04:37,035 --> 00:04:38,002
when we were...
97
00:04:38,003 --> 00:04:39,136
Well, you look great.
98
00:04:39,137 --> 00:04:40,571
Thank you.
99
00:04:40,572 --> 00:04:42,206
Lets go hang
everything up.
100
00:04:42,207 --> 00:04:43,624
Yeah, good.
101
00:04:45,377 --> 00:04:46,910
New contacts.
102
00:04:46,911 --> 00:04:49,246
I should have done this
years ago.
103
00:04:51,483 --> 00:04:54,785
So you finally getting used to
them doing it on a daily basis?
104
00:04:54,786 --> 00:04:55,920
I'm not going out with him.
105
00:04:55,921 --> 00:04:57,388
He can sleep
with whoever he wants.
106
00:04:57,389 --> 00:05:00,124
Yeah, I was talking to Raj.
107
00:05:04,563 --> 00:05:06,664
Oopsy.
108
00:05:06,665 --> 00:05:08,199
This deck is rigged in
some fashion.
109
00:05:08,200 --> 00:05:09,166
Fine. Get another deck
110
00:05:09,167 --> 00:05:10,501
and I'll do
the trick with that.
111
00:05:10,502 --> 00:05:12,102
So you're saying this is
a regulation deck?
112
00:05:12,103 --> 00:05:15,005
I'm saying believe in magic,
you muggle.
113
00:05:18,543 --> 00:05:21,478
You know, well, I'm happy
Leonard's found someone.
114
00:05:23,648 --> 00:05:26,050
Not that anybody asked.
115
00:05:30,655 --> 00:05:33,257
How many Star Trek uniforms
do you have?
116
00:05:33,258 --> 00:05:35,643
Just two:
117
00:05:35,644 --> 00:05:38,128
everyday and dress.
118
00:05:38,129 --> 00:05:39,796
Uh-huh.
119
00:05:39,797 --> 00:05:42,966
Listen, we need
to talk about something.
120
00:05:42,967 --> 00:05:45,102
Oh, my God, you're breaking up
with me!
121
00:05:45,904 --> 00:05:47,371
Why would you take me out
shopping
122
00:05:47,372 --> 00:05:49,807
and then break up with me?
That is so cruel!
123
00:05:49,808 --> 00:05:52,710
Leonard, I'm not breaking up
with you.
124
00:05:52,711 --> 00:05:54,662
Oh, okay.
125
00:05:57,949 --> 00:06:00,501
So, what's up?
126
00:06:00,502 --> 00:06:02,820
It's a little weird,
127
00:06:02,821 --> 00:06:05,989
your ex-girlfriend hanging out
here all the time.
128
00:06:05,990 --> 00:06:07,091
I know.
129
00:06:07,092 --> 00:06:08,659
I usually never see
my ex-girlfriends,
130
00:06:08,660 --> 00:06:11,095
unless their hard drives crash.
131
00:06:11,096 --> 00:06:15,566
I'm just saying, how would you
feel if I was hanging out
132
00:06:15,567 --> 00:06:16,934
with my ex-boyfriend?
133
00:06:16,935 --> 00:06:18,369
Um, not great, I guess.
134
00:06:18,370 --> 00:06:20,237
But Penny and I are
just friends.
135
00:06:20,238 --> 00:06:21,605
I don't care.
136
00:06:21,606 --> 00:06:23,474
This is a woman you have
slept with.
137
00:06:23,475 --> 00:06:24,858
If you want her around,
138
00:06:24,859 --> 00:06:28,178
then I have to wonder if maybe
you're not ready to move on.
139
00:06:28,179 --> 00:06:29,897
No, no-no-no, I'm ready!
140
00:06:29,898 --> 00:06:32,416
I gave up the gift of
sight for you.
141
00:06:32,417 --> 00:06:34,051
If that's not moving on,
what is?
142
00:06:34,052 --> 00:06:37,321
You need to cut the cord
with Penny.
143
00:06:37,322 --> 00:06:39,690
Oh... okay.
144
00:06:39,691 --> 00:06:42,025
You don't sound very confident.
145
00:06:42,026 --> 00:06:43,627
No, no, I'm confident.
146
00:06:43,628 --> 00:06:46,063
Its not like I'm unfamiliar with
the "get lost" conversation.
147
00:06:46,064 --> 00:06:49,199
Although, this will be the first
time I'll be the one saying it.
148
00:06:49,200 --> 00:06:51,368
Thank you.
149
00:06:51,369 --> 00:06:52,703
I appreciate it.
150
00:06:52,704 --> 00:06:53,971
Sure.
151
00:06:53,972 --> 00:06:56,440
Oh, God, you
smell so good.
152
00:06:56,441 --> 00:06:58,475
Of course, that
could just be
153
00:06:58,476 --> 00:07:00,394
my other senses
getting stronger.
154
00:07:03,448 --> 00:07:07,451
Hypothetically, if I had access
155
00:07:07,452 --> 00:07:12,056
to a Lieutenant Uhura uniform,
would you wear it?
156
00:07:12,057 --> 00:07:14,291
Leonard, it is a source
of great pain
157
00:07:14,292 --> 00:07:15,426
to me and my family
158
00:07:15,427 --> 00:07:17,594
that my brother has that outfit
in his wardrobe.
159
00:07:17,595 --> 00:07:19,096
Can we not discuss it?
160
00:07:19,097 --> 00:07:21,865
I'm sorry. Never mind.
161
00:07:26,004 --> 00:07:27,805
And was your card the jack
of diamonds?
162
00:07:27,806 --> 00:07:32,209
Oh, unbelievable!
163
00:07:35,480 --> 00:07:36,880
Know how he did it yet?
164
00:07:41,853 --> 00:07:43,420
Um...
165
00:07:43,421 --> 00:07:46,623
Aw, he has the same look
my little nephew gets
166
00:07:46,624 --> 00:07:49,426
when he can't figure out
how I got his nose.
167
00:07:52,731 --> 00:07:55,032
You know, I have some remedial
magic tricks
168
00:07:55,033 --> 00:07:56,800
that might be more your speed.
169
00:07:56,801 --> 00:07:58,235
Like, ooh, look!
170
00:07:59,404 --> 00:08:01,572
The pencil's rubber!
171
00:08:03,074 --> 00:08:06,043
Hey, I think I know how you did
the card trick.
172
00:08:06,044 --> 00:08:09,413
Oh, please, if I don't know,
you don't know.
173
00:08:09,414 --> 00:08:11,065
That's axiomatic.
174
00:08:11,066 --> 00:08:12,950
Come here.
175
00:08:14,085 --> 00:08:15,786
You're right.
176
00:08:17,555 --> 00:08:19,223
Not too bad for someone
177
00:08:19,224 --> 00:08:21,759
who doesn't know
what "axiomatic" means.
178
00:08:28,833 --> 00:08:30,634
Oh, hi.
179
00:08:30,635 --> 00:08:31,968
Hey, you.
180
00:08:31,969 --> 00:08:33,470
What happened with
the contacts?
181
00:08:33,471 --> 00:08:34,738
One of them's upstairs.
182
00:08:34,739 --> 00:08:38,308
The other one sort of slipped
back into my skull.
183
00:08:38,309 --> 00:08:40,661
Hey, is that one of the new
shirts Priya got you?
184
00:08:40,662 --> 00:08:41,945
Yeah.
185
00:08:41,946 --> 00:08:43,580
You don't wanna
wash that.
186
00:08:43,581 --> 00:08:45,449
No?
No, that's silk.
187
00:08:45,450 --> 00:08:47,668
Seriously, what would you do
without me?
188
00:08:47,669 --> 00:08:49,553
Yeah.
189
00:08:51,423 --> 00:08:53,340
You know, I gotta
tell you, I think
190
00:08:53,341 --> 00:08:55,926
you got a real winner with Priya.
Yeah, me, too.
191
00:08:55,927 --> 00:08:57,294
She seems really sweet.
192
00:08:57,295 --> 00:08:59,463
Believe me, you do not want
to take that for granted.
193
00:08:59,464 --> 00:09:02,232
There are a lot of bitches
out there.
194
00:09:02,233 --> 00:09:06,637
Yeah, bitches are the worst.
195
00:09:06,638 --> 00:09:08,505
All right, I'll
see you later.
196
00:09:08,506 --> 00:09:11,208
Uh, Penny, there's something
I have to tell you.
197
00:09:11,209 --> 00:09:12,342
What?
198
00:09:12,343 --> 00:09:15,112
Okay, uh, how do I put this?
199
00:09:15,113 --> 00:09:19,783
Um... are you familiar with
Darwin's observation
200
00:09:19,784 --> 00:09:22,853
of the finches
in the Galapagos Islands?
201
00:09:22,854 --> 00:09:25,155
Did they make a movie about it?
202
00:09:25,156 --> 00:09:26,857
No.
203
00:09:26,858 --> 00:09:28,792
Then no.
204
00:09:28,793 --> 00:09:32,596
All right, well, anyway, Darwin
observed that when two groups
205
00:09:32,597 --> 00:09:34,998
of finches competed
over the same food source,
206
00:09:34,999 --> 00:09:38,202
eventually one of them would
evolve a different beak shape
207
00:09:38,203 --> 00:09:40,871
so they could feed on
something else.
208
00:09:40,872 --> 00:09:43,474
Okay.
209
00:09:43,475 --> 00:09:46,743
So what do you think we can
learn from that behavior
210
00:09:46,744 --> 00:09:49,179
that we can apply
to our own lives?
211
00:09:50,281 --> 00:09:54,218
Uh, a bird in the hand is worth
two in the bush?
212
00:09:56,020 --> 00:09:59,857
Sure, that has birds in it.
213
00:10:01,226 --> 00:10:04,528
It's fun talking to you,
Leonard; I always learn stuff.
214
00:10:07,665 --> 00:10:10,400
I'm sorry,
but I'm gonna count that.
215
00:10:14,472 --> 00:10:17,875
Do you really have
to wear that in bed?
216
00:10:20,979 --> 00:10:24,314
Yeah. The doctor didn't want me
to rub my eye during the night.
217
00:10:24,315 --> 00:10:27,851
It was either this or one
of those giant neck cones.
218
00:10:27,852 --> 00:10:32,256
So did you get
to talk to Penny?
219
00:10:32,257 --> 00:10:35,959
Oh, yes.
Indeed, I did.
220
00:10:35,960 --> 00:10:37,661
And?
221
00:10:37,662 --> 00:10:40,464
She completely understood
everything I said. Case closed.
222
00:10:40,465 --> 00:10:42,099
Was she upset?
223
00:10:42,100 --> 00:10:45,402
Maybe, but that's
not my problem.
224
00:10:45,403 --> 00:10:47,371
She's not my girlfriend,
you are.
225
00:10:47,372 --> 00:10:50,374
I hope you weren't
cruel to her.
226
00:10:50,375 --> 00:10:54,778
Is the autumn cruel
for letting the flowers die,
227
00:10:54,779 --> 00:10:57,681
or is that just nature's way?
228
00:11:00,818 --> 00:11:02,653
Leonard?
Leonard?
229
00:11:02,654 --> 00:11:03,787
Leonard?
230
00:11:03,788 --> 00:11:05,289
What?!
231
00:11:05,290 --> 00:11:08,025
I think I figured out
Wolowitz's magic trick,
232
00:11:08,026 --> 00:11:11,194
and I need you
to pick a card.
233
00:11:12,730 --> 00:11:15,732
I am not opening
that door, Sheldon!
234
00:11:15,733 --> 00:11:17,067
As you wish.
235
00:11:22,173 --> 00:11:26,710
Pick a card, put it back,
and prepare to be amazed.
236
00:11:28,713 --> 00:11:30,714
Did you pick one?
237
00:11:30,715 --> 00:11:32,149
Yep.
238
00:11:34,652 --> 00:11:37,154
Is this your card?
239
00:11:37,155 --> 00:11:38,422
Nope.
240
00:11:38,423 --> 00:11:40,624
Drat.
241
00:11:41,759 --> 00:11:44,094
Is this your card?
242
00:11:44,095 --> 00:11:46,263
No.
243
00:11:46,264 --> 00:11:48,332
I'll be right back.
244
00:11:58,114 --> 00:11:59,514
Pick a card, Sheldon.
245
00:12:01,117 --> 00:12:04,953
Now look at it,
and put it back in the deck.
246
00:12:06,990 --> 00:12:08,523
Now do you remember your card?
247
00:12:08,524 --> 00:12:10,626
Of course I do, I have
an eidetic memory.
248
00:12:10,627 --> 00:12:12,394
My apologies.
249
00:12:12,395 --> 00:12:14,863
Now shuffle the cards.
250
00:12:14,864 --> 00:12:17,366
Shuffling.
251
00:12:17,367 --> 00:12:19,101
Wait here.
252
00:12:21,488 --> 00:12:24,573
Processing image,
cross-referencing...
253
00:12:24,574 --> 00:12:26,341
Whatcha doin'?
254
00:12:26,342 --> 00:12:29,378
I'm reverse engineering
Wolowitz's magic trick.
255
00:12:29,379 --> 00:12:33,482
What's up
with the infrared cameras?
256
00:12:33,483 --> 00:12:35,984
I'm measuring residual heat
levels on the playing cards
257
00:12:35,985 --> 00:12:37,586
to determine
which one's been touched.
258
00:12:37,587 --> 00:12:39,455
By the way,
259
00:12:39,456 --> 00:12:40,856
if you hope to have children,
260
00:12:40,857 --> 00:12:42,725
I suggest you switch
from briefs to boxers.
261
00:12:42,726 --> 00:12:44,626
Your testicles look a tad warm.
262
00:12:52,502 --> 00:12:55,504
Holy crap,
are you connected
263
00:12:55,505 --> 00:12:57,673
to the Oak Ridge
National Laboratory?
264
00:12:57,674 --> 00:13:00,242
Yes. I'm using their
Cray supercomputer
265
00:13:00,243 --> 00:13:01,543
to analyze
shuffling patterns.
266
00:13:01,544 --> 00:13:04,480
Sheldon, that computer
is used
267
00:13:04,481 --> 00:13:05,748
for national defense.
268
00:13:05,749 --> 00:13:07,416
Hacking into it is
a federal crime.
269
00:13:07,417 --> 00:13:10,586
Relax, we're not under
attack right now.
270
00:13:10,587 --> 00:13:16,225
Okay, I'm leaving before the
black helicopters get here.
271
00:13:17,393 --> 00:13:20,963
And is this my card?
272
00:13:20,964 --> 00:13:23,398
Rats!
273
00:13:26,169 --> 00:13:29,705
I wonder if Howard used
a radioactive tracer.
274
00:13:29,706 --> 00:13:33,609
Where am I going to find
uranium-235 this time of night?
275
00:13:36,613 --> 00:13:38,814
Come on, CraigsList.
276
00:13:42,952 --> 00:13:45,988
Is it racist that I took you
to an Indian restaurant?
277
00:13:45,989 --> 00:13:49,458
It's okay, I like Indian food.
278
00:13:49,459 --> 00:13:52,928
Or as you probably call it
back home, "food."
279
00:13:52,929 --> 00:13:55,864
Why didn't you wear
your contacts?
280
00:13:55,865 --> 00:13:57,166
Don't you like them?
281
00:13:57,167 --> 00:13:58,433
No, no, I do.
282
00:13:58,434 --> 00:14:00,502
It's just I knew I was having
curry tonight
283
00:14:00,503 --> 00:14:04,039
and I only want one part
of my body to burn at a time.
284
00:14:05,875 --> 00:14:08,010
You know...
285
00:14:08,011 --> 00:14:10,913
...my company offered me a
position here in Los Angeles.
286
00:14:10,914 --> 00:14:15,017
Does that mean you'd relocate
here permanently?
287
00:14:15,018 --> 00:14:17,553
Maybe. What do you think?
288
00:14:17,554 --> 00:14:19,888
I love it.
289
00:14:19,889 --> 00:14:21,857
That's great!
290
00:14:21,858 --> 00:14:24,993
Hi!
291
00:14:25,695 --> 00:14:28,497
Hi! Just hang on.
292
00:14:28,498 --> 00:14:31,633
Small world.
293
00:14:31,634 --> 00:14:32,801
You did talk to her, didn't you?
294
00:14:32,802 --> 00:14:35,404
Of course, I did.
I talked and talked and talked.
295
00:14:36,523 --> 00:14:40,508
Hey! Look at Leonard in his
fancy-ass grownup clothes.
296
00:14:41,945 --> 00:14:44,179
Way to go, Priya.
For once, he doesn't look
297
00:14:44,180 --> 00:14:46,515
like a mannequin in
the boys' department.
298
00:14:47,984 --> 00:14:49,284
Hey, did he
299
00:14:49,285 --> 00:14:51,053
tell you I saved
the silk shirt?
300
00:14:51,054 --> 00:14:52,421
No, he did not.
301
00:14:52,422 --> 00:14:54,523
He was gonna throw it
in the washing machine
302
00:14:54,524 --> 00:14:57,226
with his
Spiderman underwear.
303
00:14:57,227 --> 00:14:58,994
That's our Lenny, huh?
304
00:14:58,995 --> 00:15:01,964
Yes, that's our Lenny.
305
00:15:01,965 --> 00:15:04,216
So how's
the food here?
306
00:15:04,217 --> 00:15:07,085
Oh, wow, that is
really, really good.
307
00:15:07,086 --> 00:15:09,087
Oh, I'm sorry.
You guys are on a date.
308
00:15:09,088 --> 00:15:11,006
We can hang out
anytime. Have fun.
309
00:15:11,007 --> 00:15:12,341
Bye.
Good night.
310
00:15:13,760 --> 00:15:15,677
Oh, that's, hot, hot, hot, hot!
311
00:15:18,047 --> 00:15:20,766
Whoo! It really
sneaks up on ya, huh?
312
00:15:20,767 --> 00:15:22,184
All right, I gotta go.
313
00:15:26,589 --> 00:15:29,625
It is pretty spicy.
314
00:15:32,095 --> 00:15:34,196
Oh, I've been meaning
to tell you,
315
00:15:34,197 --> 00:15:36,465
I figured out
your magic trick.
316
00:15:36,466 --> 00:15:38,267
Really?
317
00:15:38,268 --> 00:15:39,468
Oh, yes.
318
00:15:39,469 --> 00:15:41,937
In fact, I improved upon it.
319
00:15:42,538 --> 00:15:43,906
I'd love to see that.
320
00:15:43,907 --> 00:15:45,173
How about you, Raj?
321
00:15:45,174 --> 00:15:47,009
Beefaroni and a show?
322
00:15:47,010 --> 00:15:48,710
How do you turn that down?
323
00:15:48,711 --> 00:15:53,582
All right.
324
00:15:53,583 --> 00:15:55,250
Pick a card.
325
00:15:55,251 --> 00:15:57,519
Okay.
326
00:15:58,588 --> 00:16:00,088
Bippity-boppity-boo.
327
00:16:09,465 --> 00:16:12,801
What's with the wand
and the beep?
328
00:16:12,802 --> 00:16:14,569
The wand is called showmanship,
329
00:16:14,570 --> 00:16:16,939
and the beep is none
of your business.
330
00:16:19,108 --> 00:16:20,175
Oh! Excuse me.
331
00:16:20,176 --> 00:16:21,710
I'm getting a text message
332
00:16:21,711 --> 00:16:24,279
completely unrelated
to this magic trick.
333
00:16:24,280 --> 00:16:27,883
Oh, look, my
dry cleaning's ready.
334
00:16:27,884 --> 00:16:31,787
And your card was
the five of spades. Ta-da.
335
00:16:31,788 --> 00:16:35,557
These cards have barcodes
on them.
336
00:16:35,558 --> 00:16:36,624
The wand is a reader.
337
00:16:36,625 --> 00:16:38,627
It's transmitting to your phone.
338
00:16:42,298 --> 00:16:44,399
I said, "ta-da."
339
00:16:44,400 --> 00:16:45,467
Show's over.
340
00:16:45,468 --> 00:16:47,769
That's pathetic.
341
00:16:47,770 --> 00:16:50,472
Let me show you how
a real magician does it.
342
00:16:50,473 --> 00:16:51,806
Raj, take a card.
343
00:16:51,807 --> 00:16:53,675
Don't let me see it.
344
00:16:53,676 --> 00:16:56,011
Okay.
345
00:16:56,012 --> 00:16:57,512
Three of clubs.
346
00:16:57,513 --> 00:16:58,914
Son of a gun,
347
00:16:58,915 --> 00:17:00,449
you're blowing my mind!
348
00:17:03,553 --> 00:17:06,154
Bippity-boppity-boo-yah!
349
00:17:08,124 --> 00:17:11,126
That does it.
I'm getting uranium.
350
00:17:15,932 --> 00:17:17,332
You ever gonna tell him?
351
00:17:17,333 --> 00:17:20,502
Maybe.
When it stops being fun.
352
00:17:20,503 --> 00:17:22,988
So never.
353
00:17:30,813 --> 00:17:32,647
Oh, hey, I was
just on my way to work.
354
00:17:32,648 --> 00:17:34,116
Oh, okay,
its not important.
355
00:17:34,117 --> 00:17:35,083
It can wait.
356
00:17:35,084 --> 00:17:36,702
No, it's all right.
Walk me down.
357
00:17:36,703 --> 00:17:37,703
So, what's up?
358
00:17:37,704 --> 00:17:39,388
Uh, I kind of have
a problem
359
00:17:39,389 --> 00:17:41,390
I was hoping
you could help me with.
360
00:17:41,391 --> 00:17:42,457
Sure, anything.
361
00:17:42,458 --> 00:17:44,960
Move out.
362
00:17:44,961 --> 00:17:46,328
What?
363
00:17:46,329 --> 00:17:47,662
Not far.
364
00:17:47,663 --> 00:17:49,731
Hey, if you ever wanna
start a family,
365
00:17:49,732 --> 00:17:51,583
La Cañada has
some great schools.
366
00:17:51,584 --> 00:17:53,001
Okay, I'm not
moving anywhere.
367
00:17:53,002 --> 00:17:55,137
What the hell
is this all about?
368
00:17:55,138 --> 00:17:57,706
Why does it have
to be about anything?
369
00:17:57,707 --> 00:17:59,808
Can't a fella ask
his buddy to relocate,
370
00:17:59,809 --> 00:18:01,910
no questions asked?
371
00:18:01,911 --> 00:18:03,311
Oh, for God's sake,
Leonard,
372
00:18:03,312 --> 00:18:04,813
this is about Priya,
isn't it?
373
00:18:04,814 --> 00:18:06,548
She doesn't want me
hanging out with you.
374
00:18:06,549 --> 00:18:09,718
Yes. There, I said it.
375
00:18:10,920 --> 00:18:12,521
Okay, look.
376
00:18:12,522 --> 00:18:14,689
I happen to like
your girlfriend.
377
00:18:14,690 --> 00:18:15,607
And she likes you.
378
00:18:15,608 --> 00:18:16,258
No, she doesn't.
379
00:18:16,259 --> 00:18:17,993
Not really, no.
380
00:18:17,994 --> 00:18:19,928
It doesn't matter.
Look, I promise from now on
381
00:18:19,929 --> 00:18:21,396
I will keep
my distance from you.
382
00:18:21,397 --> 00:18:23,799
Well, now, hold on.
What kind of distance
383
00:18:23,800 --> 00:18:25,734
are we talking about?
Because we are neighbors.
384
00:18:25,735 --> 00:18:28,036
I mean, I can hear the toilet
flush in your apartment.
385
00:18:28,037 --> 00:18:30,672
You can hear my toilet flush?
386
00:18:30,673 --> 00:18:33,241
I don't listen for it,
but it's nice to know
387
00:18:33,242 --> 00:18:36,812
everything's okay
with your plumbing.
388
00:18:36,813 --> 00:18:38,680
The building's plumbing.
389
00:18:38,681 --> 00:18:39,881
Leonard, I get it.
390
00:18:39,882 --> 00:18:41,349
You're in
a new relationship now.
391
00:18:41,350 --> 00:18:42,584
And I'm happy for you.
392
00:18:42,585 --> 00:18:45,053
So why don't we just shake
hands and part friends?
393
00:18:45,054 --> 00:18:46,254
Well, now hold on.
394
00:18:46,255 --> 00:18:47,489
How about this?
395
00:18:47,490 --> 00:18:50,692
How about we still hang out,
but on the down-low?
396
00:18:50,693 --> 00:18:54,229
Are you really that kind of guy?
397
00:18:54,230 --> 00:18:55,897
No.
398
00:18:55,898 --> 00:19:00,102
I actually felt kinda silly just
saying "on the down-low."
399
00:19:01,871 --> 00:19:03,655
Good-bye, Leonard.
400
00:19:05,675 --> 00:19:08,243
Penny, wait.
401
00:19:09,078 --> 00:19:11,746
Ah!
402
00:19:15,284 --> 00:19:17,519
Damn contacts.
403
00:19:23,128 --> 00:19:24,278
Incoming.
404
00:19:25,877 --> 00:19:28,262
- Hi!
- Hey!
405
00:19:28,282 --> 00:19:29,532
Hello.
406
00:19:30,431 --> 00:19:33,334
Why so glum, chum?
407
00:19:33,378 --> 00:19:35,379
Apparently,
you can't hack into
408
00:19:35,380 --> 00:19:37,348
a government
supercomputer
409
00:19:37,349 --> 00:19:38,949
and then try
to buy uranium
410
00:19:38,950 --> 00:19:41,085
without the Department of
Homeland Security tattling
411
00:19:41,086 --> 00:19:43,253
to your mother.
412
00:19:47,793 --> 00:19:49,126
Oh, that's too bad.
413
00:19:49,127 --> 00:19:50,695
Figure out the magic trick yet?
414
00:19:50,696 --> 00:19:52,997
Figure out the magic trick yet?
415
00:19:52,998 --> 00:19:55,232
Want me to tell you
how to do it?
416
00:19:55,233 --> 00:19:56,067
No.
417
00:19:56,068 --> 00:19:57,802
I'll show you one more time.
418
00:19:57,803 --> 00:19:59,403
Raj?
419
00:19:59,404 --> 00:20:01,105
Hang on.
420
00:20:01,106 --> 00:20:03,040
This time do it with me,
421
00:20:03,041 --> 00:20:06,343
so I can make sure
there's no monkey business.
422
00:20:08,163 --> 00:20:11,316
All right.
423
00:20:23,397 --> 00:20:25,112
- Two of hearts.
- I hate you.
424
00:20:25,130 --> 00:20:29,016
-- sync, corrected by elderman --
425
00:20:32,372 --> 00:20:34,807
Yeah, he's gonna win
the Nobel Prize.