1
00:00:01,257 --> 00:00:03,393
Are you from the Star Wars universe?
2
00:00:04,620 --> 00:00:06,589
- Were you in the original trilogy?
- Yes.
3
00:00:07,168 --> 00:00:10,818
Is there a picture of you
in my wallet wearing a metal bikini?
4
00:00:12,375 --> 00:00:13,675
God, I hope not.
5
00:00:15,067 --> 00:00:16,724
And no, I'm not Princess Leia.
6
00:00:16,893 --> 00:00:18,093
Okay. My turn.
7
00:00:18,577 --> 00:00:20,645
Are you in all six Star Wars movies?
8
00:00:20,813 --> 00:00:22,229
- Yes.
- Interesting.
9
00:00:22,399 --> 00:00:23,630
Are you a droid?
10
00:00:24,859 --> 00:00:27,459
Do you kind of look like
a shiny Sheldon?
11
00:00:31,384 --> 00:00:33,034
- C-3PO.
- You got it.
12
00:00:34,578 --> 00:00:35,958
That's preposterous.
13
00:00:36,083 --> 00:00:37,981
I do not resemble C-3PO.
14
00:00:38,531 --> 00:00:41,831
Don't get me wrong.
I'm flattered. I just don't see it.
15
00:00:47,153 --> 00:00:48,377
Leslie Winkle.
16
00:00:49,073 --> 00:00:51,573
You've reached
"Friends with Benefits."
17
00:00:52,433 --> 00:00:54,533
For a booty call, press one now.
18
00:00:57,892 --> 00:00:59,684
What exactly does
that expression mean,
19
00:00:59,852 --> 00:01:01,350
"friends with benefits"?
20
00:01:01,475 --> 00:01:04,125
Does he provide her
with health insurance?
21
00:01:06,830 --> 00:01:10,349
Imagine you maintained a friendship
with someone you had sex with,
22
00:01:10,474 --> 00:01:13,197
but you were free to date
whoever you wanted.
23
00:01:14,398 --> 00:01:16,701
I'm sorry.
I can't imagine any of that.
24
00:01:18,179 --> 00:01:20,955
- All right. Back to the game.
- I believe it's my turn.
25
00:01:21,123 --> 00:01:23,374
You may begin your questions
whenever you're ready.
26
00:01:23,542 --> 00:01:24,734
Are you Spock?
27
00:01:29,456 --> 00:01:31,106
I don't like this game.
28
00:01:32,902 --> 00:01:34,468
So, where were we?
29
00:01:34,638 --> 00:01:36,482
Aren't you leaving
for your booty call?
30
00:01:36,607 --> 00:01:38,045
No, it was something else.
31
00:01:38,170 --> 00:01:40,953
Why does everything have to be
about sex with you? Come on.
32
00:01:41,078 --> 00:01:42,142
Whose turn is it?
33
00:01:42,311 --> 00:01:44,689
- We were up to you.
- Great. Just start.
34
00:01:45,314 --> 00:01:48,649
Let's see. Are you from a TV series?
35
00:01:48,819 --> 00:01:50,017
She dumped me!
36
00:01:53,649 --> 00:01:57,032
I bet he's someone from Babylon 5.
We're never going to get it.
37
00:02:17,982 --> 00:02:19,632
Subtitles: The FWT Team
38
00:02:22,801 --> 00:02:24,394
What happened?
Why did she dump you?
39
00:02:24,943 --> 00:02:28,593
I don't know. She just said,
"Howard, Mama's a rolling stone."
40
00:02:31,780 --> 00:02:34,630
Then her call waiting beeped
and she was gone.
41
00:02:36,910 --> 00:02:38,348
I don't understand.
42
00:02:38,473 --> 00:02:41,123
If you were
in a non-emotional relationship,
43
00:02:41,248 --> 00:02:44,952
then why are you having what appears
to be an emotional response?
44
00:02:45,416 --> 00:02:47,375
He obviously had feelings for her.
45
00:02:47,586 --> 00:02:51,644
Of course I had feelings for her.
I saw her naked, for God's sake.
46
00:02:53,322 --> 00:02:55,298
Okay, you just need
to get your mind off it.
47
00:02:55,468 --> 00:02:57,370
Do you want to go
to the comic book store?
48
00:02:57,495 --> 00:03:00,430
- Maybe go see a movie?
- I don't want to go anywhere.
49
00:03:00,996 --> 00:03:01,996
You know,
50
00:03:02,586 --> 00:03:05,945
I'm given to understand
that there's an entire city in Nevada
51
00:03:06,070 --> 00:03:10,006
designed specifically to help people
like Howard forget their problems.
52
00:03:12,234 --> 00:03:14,360
They can replace them
with new problems,
53
00:03:14,528 --> 00:03:17,906
such as alcoholism, gambling addiction,
and sexually transmitted diseases.
54
00:03:20,160 --> 00:03:24,123
Is it me, or was that
Sheldon's way of saying, "Vegas, baby!"?
55
00:03:26,692 --> 00:03:29,292
- I've never been there. Have you?
- Me? No.
56
00:03:29,460 --> 00:03:32,387
I just got "Vegas, baby!"
from Vince Vaughn in Swingers.
57
00:03:34,284 --> 00:03:37,784
It could be fun.
My weekend's wide open, now that...
58
00:03:41,292 --> 00:03:44,063
Okay, let's do this.
Let's go to Las Vegas.
59
00:03:44,188 --> 00:03:45,630
Now? Right now?
60
00:03:45,755 --> 00:03:48,110
Why not? People do things "right now,"
all the time.
61
00:03:48,235 --> 00:03:50,209
Why can't we be
"right now" people, too?
62
00:03:50,334 --> 00:03:53,534
Go home, pack a bag,
and we'll be "right now" people.
63
00:03:53,676 --> 00:03:56,011
I have to stop at the drug store
to refill a prescription,
64
00:03:56,136 --> 00:03:58,309
but after that, we'll go right now.
65
00:03:59,186 --> 00:04:00,747
What do you say, Howard?
66
00:04:00,872 --> 00:04:01,872
I say...
67
00:04:02,122 --> 00:04:03,360
"Vegas, baby!"
68
00:04:04,358 --> 00:04:07,858
- What are you gonna tell your mother?
- "Sea World, baby!"
69
00:04:12,509 --> 00:04:15,674
- Are you coming?
- I'd rather have a blowfly lay eggs
70
00:04:15,799 --> 00:04:18,249
and hatch larvae
in my auditory canal.
71
00:04:20,966 --> 00:04:22,804
Great.
We'll bring you back a t-shirt.
72
00:04:26,804 --> 00:04:27,809
Thank you.
73
00:04:29,406 --> 00:04:30,706
Hello, neighbor.
74
00:04:30,980 --> 00:04:32,146
Hello, Sheldon.
75
00:04:33,200 --> 00:04:35,400
And how are you this fine evening?
76
00:04:35,659 --> 00:04:37,915
- Great.
- Good. I'm glad.
77
00:04:38,741 --> 00:04:40,391
Really?
Are you drunk?
78
00:04:41,466 --> 00:04:43,107
I'm just in a good mood.
79
00:04:43,232 --> 00:04:45,485
While my compatriots
are in Las Vegas,
80
00:04:45,610 --> 00:04:49,514
I will be enjoying a blissful evening
in my personal Fortress of Solitude.
81
00:04:50,212 --> 00:04:52,762
That's Superman's
big ice thingy, right?
82
00:04:53,669 --> 00:04:55,305
You know, I'm in such a good mood,
83
00:04:55,430 --> 00:04:58,067
I'm actually finding your tenuous grasp
of the English language
84
00:04:58,192 --> 00:04:59,975
folksy and charming today.
85
00:05:02,651 --> 00:05:04,151
What smells so good?
86
00:05:04,276 --> 00:05:07,800
That is the intoxicating
aroma of Kadhai Paneer,
87
00:05:08,185 --> 00:05:11,473
a perfect culinary representation
of the freedom this evening holds.
88
00:05:11,598 --> 00:05:14,912
Not only is it Indian cuisine,
which Koothrappali loathes,
89
00:05:15,037 --> 00:05:16,975
it contains
a generous helping of peanuts,
90
00:05:17,100 --> 00:05:20,528
which would reduce Wolowitz
to a wheezing 97-pound blister.
91
00:05:22,449 --> 00:05:25,348
And finally,
its main ingredient is paneer,
92
00:05:25,473 --> 00:05:26,862
a farmer's cheese
93
00:05:26,987 --> 00:05:30,774
that would cause Leonard to render
any room uninhabitable within minutes.
94
00:05:33,972 --> 00:05:35,025
Yum.
95
00:05:36,569 --> 00:05:38,519
Well, enjoy your big evening.
96
00:05:39,925 --> 00:05:42,254
I realize you're also
on your own tonight,
97
00:05:42,379 --> 00:05:45,195
so if, at some point, you find
yourself with nothing to do,
98
00:05:45,320 --> 00:05:47,054
please do not disturb me.
99
00:05:48,647 --> 00:05:49,891
Have fun, Sheldon.
100
00:05:50,180 --> 00:05:51,210
I shall.
101
00:06:06,903 --> 00:06:10,244
What's wrong, Superman?
Locked out of your big ice thingy?
102
00:06:19,385 --> 00:06:22,380
Look at this.
Mouthwash, lotion, body wash.
103
00:06:22,505 --> 00:06:26,104
Shampoo and conditioner
together in one tiny bottle.
104
00:06:27,204 --> 00:06:28,554
I love Las Vegas.
105
00:06:30,164 --> 00:06:32,182
Howard, could I borrow
some aftershave?
106
00:06:32,351 --> 00:06:33,935
Black case, top compartment.
107
00:06:40,187 --> 00:06:41,881
That's a lot of cologne.
108
00:06:42,006 --> 00:06:44,737
First row are your musks.
Second is woods,
109
00:06:45,070 --> 00:06:46,681
leathers and botanicals.
110
00:06:46,806 --> 00:06:49,521
Third is assorted pheromones.
Tread lightly.
111
00:06:56,784 --> 00:06:58,584
That's the spirit, Howard.
112
00:06:59,967 --> 00:07:01,238
Yes, we can.
113
00:07:05,013 --> 00:07:06,030
Let's go.
114
00:07:06,155 --> 00:07:09,355
You guys go ahead.
I just have to finish up an email.
115
00:07:09,627 --> 00:07:12,866
That's not an email.
That's Leslie's Facebook page.
116
00:07:12,991 --> 00:07:13,724
Fine.
117
00:07:14,019 --> 00:07:16,459
I'm checking her Facebook page.
Look at her status update.
118
00:07:16,584 --> 00:07:19,188
She's saying she dumped me.
People need to know I dumped her.
119
00:07:20,502 --> 00:07:21,732
But she did dump you.
120
00:07:23,080 --> 00:07:26,480
Grow up, Raj. There's no place
for truth on the Internet.
121
00:07:29,187 --> 00:07:31,196
Just go.
I'll catch up with you.
122
00:07:31,618 --> 00:07:32,659
All right.
123
00:07:33,559 --> 00:07:36,122
We should have a plan
in case one of us gets lucky.
124
00:07:39,349 --> 00:07:41,519
Okay, if I get lucky,
125
00:07:41,644 --> 00:07:45,006
I'll take her to my stately manor
outside Gotham City, and...
126
00:07:45,879 --> 00:07:48,479
if you get lucky,
I'll sleep on the moon.
127
00:07:50,091 --> 00:07:51,541
Sounds like a plan.
128
00:07:53,639 --> 00:07:56,517
Hang on. I think the emergency key
is around here somewhere.
129
00:07:57,088 --> 00:07:58,338
We have a bowl.
130
00:07:59,391 --> 00:08:00,991
Our keys go in a bowl.
131
00:08:02,056 --> 00:08:03,656
You should get a bowl.
132
00:08:04,594 --> 00:08:06,712
So, how did the beautiful mind
of Sheldon Cooper
133
00:08:06,837 --> 00:08:08,446
forget his key in the first place?
134
00:08:09,595 --> 00:08:11,365
I left them in the bowl.
135
00:08:13,077 --> 00:08:14,909
I just remembered
where the emergency key is.
136
00:08:15,260 --> 00:08:17,038
Where?
In your apartment.
137
00:08:17,641 --> 00:08:20,135
- What's it doing in my apartment?
- I went in there a few weeks ago
138
00:08:20,260 --> 00:08:22,251
and you guys weren't
home and I forgot it there.
139
00:08:22,601 --> 00:08:25,701
You went in my... Why would...
What are you saying?
140
00:08:26,174 --> 00:08:28,548
It's not a big deal. I was making coffee
and I ran out of milk.
141
00:08:28,805 --> 00:08:30,405
You're the milk thief!
142
00:08:33,223 --> 00:08:36,522
Leonard said I was crazy,
but I knew that carton felt lighter.
143
00:08:37,518 --> 00:08:39,235
All right. Just calm down.
144
00:08:39,360 --> 00:08:41,997
I will call the building manager
and he'll come open your door.
145
00:08:42,122 --> 00:08:43,870
Eat your dinner here
while you're waiting.
146
00:08:43,995 --> 00:08:46,622
Eat? My dinner?
In your apartment?
147
00:08:47,111 --> 00:08:48,189
Why not?
148
00:08:48,314 --> 00:08:50,085
Sure. Why not?
149
00:08:50,277 --> 00:08:53,008
And after the sun's down,
we can all pile in my pickup
150
00:08:53,133 --> 00:08:55,243
and go skinny-dipping
down at the creek.
151
00:08:56,760 --> 00:08:58,954
'Cause today's the day
to stop making sense.
152
00:09:04,456 --> 00:09:05,232
Thanks.
153
00:09:05,357 --> 00:09:07,457
I'm telling you, Leonard...
video slots...
154
00:09:07,733 --> 00:09:10,621
free drinks brought to us
by a bosomy barmaid
155
00:09:11,149 --> 00:09:13,177
and all you can eat shrimp
for $3.95.
156
00:09:15,113 --> 00:09:16,763
Disneyland can suck it.
157
00:09:20,019 --> 00:09:22,902
This is the real
happiest place on earth.
158
00:09:26,385 --> 00:09:29,285
Dude, check it out!
That's laundry for a month!
159
00:09:32,027 --> 00:09:33,027
Hi.
160
00:09:39,888 --> 00:09:40,888
Hello.
161
00:09:42,467 --> 00:09:45,739
- What's your name?
- Rajesh Ramayan Koothrappali.
162
00:09:47,272 --> 00:09:48,672
Hello, Rajesh Ra...
163
00:09:49,524 --> 00:09:50,574
Hi, Rajesh.
164
00:09:52,151 --> 00:09:53,927
- I'm Michaela.
- Hello, Michaela.
165
00:09:54,593 --> 00:09:56,511
So, you interested
in a little party?
166
00:09:58,034 --> 00:09:59,834
Why, yes, I love to party.
167
00:10:00,788 --> 00:10:02,412
Party is my middle name.
168
00:10:02,537 --> 00:10:04,987
Or, it would be
if it weren't Ramayan.
169
00:10:07,417 --> 00:10:09,831
- Can I talk to you for a moment?
- Not now.
170
00:10:09,956 --> 00:10:11,734
Michaela's inviting me to a party.
171
00:10:12,674 --> 00:10:15,530
You better call the moon
and make sure they have a bed for you.
172
00:10:18,486 --> 00:10:20,660
Yeah. I really need to talk to you.
173
00:10:21,393 --> 00:10:24,267
Excuse me. I'll be right back.
Don't go anywhere. Don't move.
174
00:10:24,392 --> 00:10:28,187
Just stay the beautiful, unspoiled
American flower that you are.
175
00:10:29,950 --> 00:10:33,298
What's wrong with you, dude?
That woman was all up in my jammy.
176
00:10:33,915 --> 00:10:37,830
Okay, I hate to break this to you
and whatever your "jammy" is, but...
177
00:10:38,720 --> 00:10:40,388
I'm pretty sure she's a prostitute.
178
00:10:41,361 --> 00:10:42,361
What?
179
00:10:46,147 --> 00:10:48,353
Let me put it this way:
In your entire life,
180
00:10:48,478 --> 00:10:50,873
how many gorgeous women
have walked straight up to you in a bar
181
00:10:50,998 --> 00:10:52,962
and asked if you wanted to party?
182
00:10:56,205 --> 00:10:57,823
Maybe I can save her.
183
00:11:00,518 --> 00:11:04,475
Maybe, but I'm guessing it'll cost you
about $500 an hour to try.
184
00:11:09,629 --> 00:11:13,289
It was lovely meeting you.
Best of luck in your future endeavors.
185
00:11:15,257 --> 00:11:16,331
Whatever.
186
00:11:18,525 --> 00:11:20,078
I miss her already.
187
00:11:24,792 --> 00:11:26,164
Howard's losing it.
188
00:11:26,289 --> 00:11:28,166
Check out his latest Twitters.
189
00:11:28,536 --> 00:11:31,795
"I'm at the bottom of a black hole
staring into the abyss.
190
00:11:32,216 --> 00:11:35,188
"My life is meaningless.
My future is without hope."
191
00:11:35,821 --> 00:11:38,488
Why don't we take him
to see the Blue Man Group?
192
00:11:39,339 --> 00:11:40,489
You think that'd help?
193
00:11:40,660 --> 00:11:43,902
USA Today calls them
"exuberant fun for the whole family."
194
00:11:44,967 --> 00:11:48,248
I don't know, Howard isn't really
the family fun kind of guy.
195
00:11:49,364 --> 00:11:51,334
It's too bad he wasn't here
for that hooker.
196
00:11:51,837 --> 00:11:54,254
She's exactly his type; a hooker.
197
00:11:56,424 --> 00:11:59,801
You know, I bet if we hired her,
that would cheer him up.
198
00:12:00,060 --> 00:12:02,500
We're not gonna get
Wolowitz a hooker.
199
00:12:06,947 --> 00:12:08,911
"I'm so lonely and horny,
200
00:12:09,036 --> 00:12:12,813
"I may open this $20 jar
of peanuts and end it all."
201
00:12:18,157 --> 00:12:20,860
I suppose it wouldn't hurt
to get an estimate.
202
00:12:25,766 --> 00:12:27,266
So how was your day?
203
00:12:29,772 --> 00:12:31,919
Are you trying to make small talk?
204
00:12:32,322 --> 00:12:34,210
Sweetie, you really don't have to.
205
00:12:34,564 --> 00:12:36,712
No, it's the accepted convention.
206
00:12:39,869 --> 00:12:41,232
How was your day?
207
00:12:43,422 --> 00:12:45,848
They shifted my schedule around
at the restaurant,
208
00:12:45,973 --> 00:12:47,891
- so my hours are gonna be...
- I'm sorry.
209
00:12:48,059 --> 00:12:50,392
That's not going to interest me at all.
Just eat.
210
00:12:59,625 --> 00:13:00,814
Hello again.
211
00:13:02,866 --> 00:13:04,188
Hi. Listen...
212
00:13:04,725 --> 00:13:08,243
If you're not busy,
we were thinking maybe you could...
213
00:13:09,331 --> 00:13:12,375
- We were wondering...
- If you're really a prostitute.
214
00:13:14,359 --> 00:13:15,752
- You guys cops?
- No.
215
00:13:15,920 --> 00:13:17,216
I'm a prostitute.
216
00:13:18,620 --> 00:13:20,078
Okay, great.
217
00:13:29,424 --> 00:13:33,277
The thing is, we've got this friend,
and he's kind of down in the dumps.
218
00:13:33,402 --> 00:13:35,921
And we thought maybe you
could cheer him up.
219
00:13:36,216 --> 00:13:37,216
With sex.
220
00:13:39,846 --> 00:13:41,360
I think she knows what I meant.
221
00:13:41,531 --> 00:13:44,253
How when you beat around the bush?
She's from the mean streets
222
00:13:44,378 --> 00:13:46,774
where they shoot from the hip
and keep it real.
223
00:13:48,704 --> 00:13:51,079
Don't worry.
I can take good care of your friend.
224
00:13:51,378 --> 00:13:53,028
Okay, terrific.
225
00:13:54,373 --> 00:13:56,951
Listen, is there
a way that we can do this
226
00:13:57,076 --> 00:14:00,489
where he doesn't know
that you're a, you know...
227
00:14:00,614 --> 00:14:01,689
Prostitute.
228
00:14:03,338 --> 00:14:04,968
You want the girlfriend experience.
229
00:14:05,485 --> 00:14:08,617
Yes. Yeah, exactly.
The girlfriend experience.
230
00:14:08,742 --> 00:14:10,505
Actually,
if it's not too much to ask,
231
00:14:10,630 --> 00:14:13,266
could we have the Jewish
girlfriend experience?
232
00:14:16,027 --> 00:14:18,648
Okay, that's question 20.
You have to guess.
233
00:14:20,895 --> 00:14:22,495
I don't know, Sheldon.
234
00:14:22,903 --> 00:14:24,379
Are you Star Wars?
235
00:14:26,574 --> 00:14:29,065
How can one person be a whole movie?
236
00:14:30,492 --> 00:14:32,287
I give up.
Can we just do something else?
237
00:14:33,264 --> 00:14:34,280
Fine.
238
00:14:34,810 --> 00:14:35,890
I was Spock.
239
00:14:41,367 --> 00:14:43,881
Are you and Leonard
friends with benefits?
240
00:14:44,730 --> 00:14:45,730
What?
241
00:14:46,176 --> 00:14:48,094
Are you and Leonard
friends with benefits?
242
00:14:48,351 --> 00:14:50,721
Where did that even come from?
Did he say we were?
243
00:14:50,933 --> 00:14:53,474
No, Leonard said nothing.
But who knows what goes on over here
244
00:14:53,599 --> 00:14:55,863
when he pretends
your mail was misdelivered?
245
00:14:57,632 --> 00:14:59,439
Just mail, no benefits.
246
00:15:00,201 --> 00:15:01,201
I see.
247
00:15:01,704 --> 00:15:03,212
Why are you asking?
248
00:15:03,541 --> 00:15:06,301
I'm curious about the
whole social construct.
249
00:15:06,584 --> 00:15:10,564
On its face, the idea
of satisfying one's sexual appetite,
250
00:15:10,689 --> 00:15:12,368
assuming one is afflicted with such,
251
00:15:12,750 --> 00:15:15,582
without emotional entanglement,
252
00:15:15,707 --> 00:15:17,243
that seems eminently practical.
253
00:15:17,368 --> 00:15:18,927
What I've observed, however,
254
00:15:19,052 --> 00:15:22,187
is Howard Wolowitz
crying like a little girl.
255
00:15:23,949 --> 00:15:26,715
Some people just can't handle
that kind of relationship.
256
00:15:27,726 --> 00:15:28,726
Can you?
257
00:15:31,594 --> 00:15:32,594
Excuse me?
258
00:15:33,330 --> 00:15:34,840
Are you able to have sex with men
259
00:15:34,965 --> 00:15:36,809
without developing
an emotional attachment?
260
00:15:38,481 --> 00:15:42,315
I really... don't want
to talk about this with you.
261
00:15:42,647 --> 00:15:44,512
Is this conversation making you
uncomfortable?
262
00:15:44,694 --> 00:15:47,111
Of course it's making me uncomfortable.
Can't you tell?
263
00:15:47,443 --> 00:15:48,696
I really have no idea.
264
00:15:48,866 --> 00:15:51,616
I don't particularly excel
at reading facial expressions...
265
00:15:51,785 --> 00:15:53,528
I'm uncomfortable, Sheldon!
266
00:15:55,808 --> 00:15:57,676
Thank you. That's very helpful.
267
00:16:00,719 --> 00:16:03,294
All right, where are
these amazing shrimp?
268
00:16:04,154 --> 00:16:05,170
Behold.
269
00:16:07,665 --> 00:16:10,874
Seriously, you think this is
the size of a baby's arm?
270
00:16:12,457 --> 00:16:13,590
A little baby.
271
00:16:15,291 --> 00:16:16,599
I'm going back to the room.
272
00:16:17,227 --> 00:16:20,294
Boy, would it maybe kill them
to put out a nice brisket?
273
00:16:31,748 --> 00:16:33,765
Hi, there. Howard Wolowitz.
274
00:16:35,184 --> 00:16:36,584
Esther Rosenblatt.
275
00:16:43,478 --> 00:16:46,522
I don't think the manager's
coming tonight, so here.
276
00:16:47,461 --> 00:16:49,818
Are you suggesting
I sleep on the couch?
277
00:16:50,840 --> 00:16:52,962
It wasn't the first suggestion
that came to mind,
278
00:16:53,087 --> 00:16:55,054
but it's the one I'm going with.
279
00:16:56,082 --> 00:16:58,599
I can't sleep on your couch.
I sleep in a bed.
280
00:16:58,769 --> 00:17:02,185
And given its dimensions, I have
no intention of living out Snickering's
281
00:17:02,355 --> 00:17:05,314
beloved children's book,
The Tall Man From Cornwall.
282
00:17:06,755 --> 00:17:07,755
What?
283
00:17:08,710 --> 00:17:10,622
"There was a tall man from Cornwall
284
00:17:10,747 --> 00:17:12,434
"whose length exceed his bed.
285
00:17:12,559 --> 00:17:14,491
"My body fits on it,
but barely upon it,
286
00:17:14,616 --> 00:17:17,071
"there's no room
for my big Cornish head."
287
00:17:23,814 --> 00:17:27,211
All right, I will give you my bed
on one condition:
288
00:17:27,597 --> 00:17:30,923
that you promise to zip your hole
for the next eight hours.
289
00:17:32,097 --> 00:17:33,633
May I say one last thing?
290
00:17:33,804 --> 00:17:35,177
Only if it doesn't rhyme.
291
00:17:37,393 --> 00:17:38,487
All right.
292
00:17:43,132 --> 00:17:44,150
Good night.
293
00:17:47,999 --> 00:17:50,103
Turn-ons? Let me see.
294
00:17:50,559 --> 00:17:52,862
Reading a good book
in front of the fire,
295
00:17:53,031 --> 00:17:54,919
long walks on the beach...
296
00:17:55,482 --> 00:17:58,921
and getting freaky on the Sabbath
with a bacon cheeseburger.
297
00:18:03,041 --> 00:18:04,557
Really? Me, too!
298
00:18:07,534 --> 00:18:09,184
Oy, gevalt, you're hot.
299
00:18:13,653 --> 00:18:15,360
Excuse me for a moment.
300
00:18:19,437 --> 00:18:20,388
How's it going?
301
00:18:20,559 --> 00:18:22,724
Cut the crap.
You set this up, didn't you?
302
00:18:24,896 --> 00:18:26,312
She's a hooker, isn't she?
303
00:18:27,315 --> 00:18:28,715
A prostitute, yes.
304
00:18:30,805 --> 00:18:32,530
You already gave her the money?
305
00:18:34,551 --> 00:18:35,551
Thank you!
306
00:18:46,971 --> 00:18:47,971
What?
307
00:18:49,028 --> 00:18:50,371
I can't sleep.
308
00:18:51,712 --> 00:18:54,351
Maybe that's because your hole
is still open.
309
00:18:56,707 --> 00:18:57,840
I'm homesick.
310
00:19:00,140 --> 00:19:02,391
Your home is 20 feet from here.
311
00:19:02,947 --> 00:19:05,420
20 feet, 20 light-years,
it doesn't matter.
312
00:19:06,562 --> 00:19:08,410
It's in a galaxy far, far away.
313
00:19:10,742 --> 00:19:11,742
Damn it.
314
00:19:15,614 --> 00:19:17,318
What do you want me to do?
315
00:19:18,607 --> 00:19:20,007
Sing Soft Kitty.
316
00:19:23,037 --> 00:19:24,996
That's only for when you're sick.
317
00:19:26,621 --> 00:19:28,634
Homesick is a type of being sick.
318
00:19:32,603 --> 00:19:34,789
Come on, do I really have to?
319
00:19:35,847 --> 00:19:37,800
I suppose we can stay up and talk.
320
00:19:40,260 --> 00:19:41,860
Soft kitty
321
00:19:42,804 --> 00:19:44,251
Warm kitty
322
00:19:44,376 --> 00:19:46,677
Little ball of fur
323
00:19:47,432 --> 00:19:49,234
Happy kitty
324
00:19:52,555 --> 00:19:54,420
- Sleepy kitty.
- Sleepy kit...
325
00:19:57,420 --> 00:19:58,420
Start over.
326
00:20:03,723 --> 00:20:05,577
Soft kitty
327
00:20:05,702 --> 00:20:07,091
Warm kitty
328
00:20:07,216 --> 00:20:09,565
Little ball of fur
329
00:20:10,477 --> 00:20:11,954
Happy kitty
330
00:20:12,079 --> 00:20:13,461
Sleepy kitty
331
00:20:13,813 --> 00:20:16,113
Purr, purr, purr
332
00:20:21,852 --> 00:20:23,763
Thank you for letting me stay here.
333
00:20:25,101 --> 00:20:26,807
You're welcome, sweetie.
334
00:20:31,418 --> 00:20:33,303
Okay, I'm sleepy now.
Get out.
335
00:20:44,448 --> 00:20:46,653
Good. You're finally home.
336
00:20:46,949 --> 00:20:48,454
What were you doing at Penny's?
337
00:20:48,790 --> 00:20:50,385
Well, we had dinner,
338
00:20:50,510 --> 00:20:52,584
played some games,
and then I spent the night.
339
00:20:54,375 --> 00:20:56,183
You'll be happy to know
that I now have
340
00:20:56,308 --> 00:20:58,965
a much better understanding
of "friends with benefits."