1 00:00:03,016 --> 00:00:05,452 I cannot believe you made up your own game. 2 00:00:06,311 --> 00:00:08,966 "Research Lab" is more than a game. 3 00:00:09,447 --> 00:00:10,696 It's like the slogan says: 4 00:00:10,821 --> 00:00:13,794 "The physics is theoretical, but the fun is real." 5 00:00:15,796 --> 00:00:17,809 We must not be playing it right. 6 00:00:19,529 --> 00:00:23,197 All right, five. One, two, three, four, five. 7 00:00:24,035 --> 00:00:27,235 Look at that. My Department of Defense research grant is renewed. 8 00:00:28,470 --> 00:00:29,314 Great roll! 9 00:00:29,439 --> 00:00:32,317 Now you can demolish your Soviet-style cyclotron 10 00:00:32,442 --> 00:00:34,514 and build the large Hadron Collider. 11 00:00:38,024 --> 00:00:39,372 You're a natural at this. 12 00:00:39,618 --> 00:00:42,255 And as the first beta testers, you two'll have quite the edge 13 00:00:42,380 --> 00:00:44,668 when we play with Wolowitz and Koothrappali on Sunday. 14 00:00:46,963 --> 00:00:49,215 I don't think we can play on Sunday. 15 00:00:49,503 --> 00:00:50,530 Why not? 16 00:00:50,865 --> 00:00:53,511 Because of the reasons that Penny will now tell you. 17 00:00:55,062 --> 00:00:57,181 I have to pick up my friend Justin from the airport. 18 00:00:57,351 --> 00:00:59,725 She has to pick up her friend Justin at the airport. 19 00:00:59,895 --> 00:01:02,061 And I can't play 'cause I'm going with her... right? 20 00:01:03,294 --> 00:01:04,838 If you want. There may not be room. 21 00:01:04,963 --> 00:01:07,650 He's got a lot of stuff... like guitars and amplifiers... 22 00:01:08,183 --> 00:01:11,820 - Wait. What are you talking about? - My friend Justin. 23 00:01:11,989 --> 00:01:14,240 Pay attention. That's why she can't play on Sunday. 24 00:01:15,059 --> 00:01:16,575 - Who is this Justin? - Your turn. 25 00:01:16,745 --> 00:01:19,245 - I told you about him. - No, you didn't. 26 00:01:19,414 --> 00:01:23,143 My friend from Omaha, plays the guitar, he's coming to LA looking for work, 27 00:01:23,268 --> 00:01:25,376 I told him he could crash on my couch for a few weeks. 28 00:01:25,544 --> 00:01:28,860 Come on... if you roll a six, Penny dies horribly in a nuclear meltdown. 29 00:01:30,974 --> 00:01:33,426 See what I mean when I say the fun is real? 30 00:01:34,386 --> 00:01:37,138 Hang on. Some guy is going to be sleeping on your couch? 31 00:01:37,589 --> 00:01:39,741 He's not "some guy." He's my friend. 32 00:01:40,076 --> 00:01:43,019 So by "friend," do you mean "friend friend," 33 00:01:43,188 --> 00:01:46,046 "gay friend," or "ex-boyfriend who you're now platonic with 34 00:01:46,171 --> 00:01:48,482 "but still might have a thing for you friend"? 35 00:01:49,153 --> 00:01:51,277 Well, he's definitely not gay. 36 00:01:51,960 --> 00:01:55,613 A definitely not gay musician sleeping on my girlfriend's couch. 37 00:01:58,549 --> 00:02:00,620 We went out a little bit, a long time ago. 38 00:02:00,789 --> 00:02:02,705 But we were never like "going out." 39 00:02:02,873 --> 00:02:05,120 Okay, not to be pedantic, but last I checked 40 00:02:05,245 --> 00:02:07,627 "went out" was in fact the past tense of "going out"... 41 00:02:07,795 --> 00:02:09,921 which I think we all know is a popular euphemism 42 00:02:10,046 --> 00:02:11,723 for "saw each other naked." 43 00:02:13,552 --> 00:02:14,975 I'll just roll for you. 44 00:02:16,439 --> 00:02:18,512 Do you have a problem with Justin staying with me? 45 00:02:18,773 --> 00:02:20,139 What was your first clue? 46 00:02:20,822 --> 00:02:22,691 Industrial accident. 47 00:02:24,153 --> 00:02:26,145 You know what? Don't talk to me like I'm an idiot. 48 00:02:26,313 --> 00:02:29,565 I'm not talking to you like that! I'm saying the whole idea is idiotic! 49 00:02:29,733 --> 00:02:31,845 "You accidentally stare at a helium-argon laser. 50 00:02:31,970 --> 00:02:33,758 "Lose one turn and a retina." 51 00:02:34,891 --> 00:02:36,822 How is that not talking to me like I'm an idiot? 52 00:02:36,992 --> 00:02:39,659 It's my friend, it's my couch, and it's my freakin' life! 53 00:02:39,828 --> 00:02:41,138 It's also your roll. 54 00:02:42,045 --> 00:02:43,496 You know what? It is your life. 55 00:02:43,664 --> 00:02:46,410 If you want to have some stupid guitarist stay on your couch, then fine! 56 00:02:46,535 --> 00:02:50,294 Why don't you just rent some bunk beds and invite The Black Eyed Peas?! 57 00:02:50,904 --> 00:02:53,290 If I want to invite the entire lineup of Lollapalooza 58 00:02:53,415 --> 00:02:55,841 to sleep in my apartment, I will, and it's none of your business! 59 00:02:56,011 --> 00:02:58,427 Are you listening to yourself? Do you know how childish you sound? 60 00:02:58,645 --> 00:03:01,097 Now I'm a child? Well, at least I'm not an idiot anymore! 61 00:03:01,321 --> 00:03:02,806 The two aren't mutually exclusive! 62 00:03:03,211 --> 00:03:04,474 You are such a... 63 00:03:04,983 --> 00:03:06,518 What the hell is he doing?! 64 00:03:06,688 --> 00:03:09,312 He's drowning us out. He doesn't like fighting. 65 00:03:09,482 --> 00:03:11,365 Just stop! Look, the fight is over! 66 00:03:12,085 --> 00:03:13,108 And FYI, 67 00:03:13,278 --> 00:03:15,902 you never even heard of The Black Eyed Peas until you met me! 68 00:03:16,190 --> 00:03:17,376 I heard of 'em! 69 00:03:19,174 --> 00:03:20,905 Didn't know they were a band. 70 00:03:22,858 --> 00:03:25,161 Sheldon, she's gone. You can turn off the blender. 71 00:03:31,720 --> 00:03:34,593 Has your relationship reached its inevitable ugly end? 72 00:03:36,826 --> 00:03:39,259 No, we just had a little spat. 73 00:03:39,600 --> 00:03:40,904 Look on the bright side. 74 00:03:41,029 --> 00:03:42,906 As the result of Penny's forfeit, 75 00:03:43,031 --> 00:03:46,496 you have become the world's first winner of "Research Lab." 76 00:03:47,460 --> 00:03:49,270 Would you like a commemorative snow cone? 77 00:03:51,481 --> 00:03:54,567 Episode 307: The Guitarist Amplification 78 00:03:54,735 --> 00:03:57,304 Sync: Jess, Linwelin, Loky 79 00:04:11,460 --> 00:04:13,922 www.subbercafe.fr 80 00:04:19,836 --> 00:04:21,434 I don't get how she can just announce 81 00:04:21,559 --> 00:04:23,845 that an old boyfriend is going to be sleeping on her couch. 82 00:04:24,440 --> 00:04:26,474 I thought of a game we can play in the car. 83 00:04:26,685 --> 00:04:28,018 I don't want to play a game. 84 00:04:28,143 --> 00:04:31,270 It's called "Scientists." Now, I will name three scientists, 85 00:04:31,438 --> 00:04:32,838 then you will put them in order 86 00:04:32,963 --> 00:04:35,315 of the size of their contribution to their respective fields. 87 00:04:35,527 --> 00:04:37,453 To make this game even more compelling, 88 00:04:37,578 --> 00:04:40,737 you must consider only the contribution of the man to the field, 89 00:04:41,032 --> 00:04:43,105 not the validity of the field itself. 90 00:04:43,230 --> 00:04:45,607 For example: Abu Musa Jabir ibn Hayyan 91 00:04:45,732 --> 00:04:48,777 made a greater contribution to the discredited field of alchemy 92 00:04:48,902 --> 00:04:51,129 than Halbert Vanderplatt made to neurobiology. 93 00:04:51,254 --> 00:04:52,946 Okay, ready to have some fun? 94 00:04:54,671 --> 00:04:56,835 An old boyfriend who's definitely not gay. 95 00:04:56,960 --> 00:04:59,715 That's what a guy likes to hear... "definitely." 96 00:04:59,926 --> 00:05:01,664 All right, I'll start with an easy one: 97 00:05:02,473 --> 00:05:05,635 Isaac Newton, Madame Curie and Niels Bohr. 98 00:05:06,391 --> 00:05:08,932 And then I say one little thing and I end up being the bad guy! 99 00:05:09,144 --> 00:05:12,269 Hint: Madame Curie had her husband to help her. 100 00:05:12,480 --> 00:05:13,852 What am I supposed to say? 101 00:05:13,977 --> 00:05:16,273 "Sure, Penny, I'm cool with your old boyfriend 102 00:05:16,443 --> 00:05:17,756 sleeping in your apartment." 103 00:05:18,240 --> 00:05:19,943 "It doesn't matter if you're cool or not 104 00:05:20,113 --> 00:05:23,195 "because I'm Penny and I'm pretty and I can do whatever the hell I want!" 105 00:05:23,709 --> 00:05:27,432 "You think you're doing me a favor by being in a relationship with me!" 106 00:05:27,557 --> 00:05:30,412 "I'm doing you a favor just by being in the same room as you!" 107 00:05:30,623 --> 00:05:31,927 Leonard! Stop the car! 108 00:05:33,728 --> 00:05:34,652 What? 109 00:05:34,777 --> 00:05:37,085 I can't listen to the two of you fight anymore. 110 00:05:42,448 --> 00:05:45,083 - Come on, we're late. - Calm down. We'll make the movie. 111 00:05:45,208 --> 00:05:47,752 I believe my alarm is appropriate, given the situation. 112 00:05:47,877 --> 00:05:49,280 The movie starts in 17 minutes. 113 00:05:49,405 --> 00:05:51,998 We'll need to make all the lights on Colorado Boulevard, 114 00:05:52,123 --> 00:05:54,728 plus skip the concession stand, and preshow urination. 115 00:05:56,180 --> 00:05:59,668 Dude, I wish you had said something before I pounded that last Red Bull. 116 00:06:00,887 --> 00:06:02,591 Go, go, Power Rangers, go! 117 00:06:08,003 --> 00:06:09,451 We're going to the movies. 118 00:06:09,707 --> 00:06:10,619 No, we're not. 119 00:06:11,915 --> 00:06:15,042 We're standing in the hallway, suffering through an awkward encounter. 120 00:06:16,423 --> 00:06:17,500 Hang on. 121 00:06:18,319 --> 00:06:20,345 They're showing a new digital print of Time Bandits. 122 00:06:20,470 --> 00:06:23,089 - You wouldn't want to come, would you? - Not really, no. 123 00:06:23,301 --> 00:06:26,458 Invitation pointlessly offered, invitation declined as expected, 124 00:06:26,583 --> 00:06:29,272 everyone's civil, nobody's fighting. Have a nice evening. 125 00:06:31,653 --> 00:06:33,253 Just give us a minute. 126 00:06:33,501 --> 00:06:35,177 Take all the time you need. 127 00:06:39,374 --> 00:06:41,734 So, are we going to talk about last night? 128 00:06:42,214 --> 00:06:43,611 Are you ready to apologize? 129 00:06:44,905 --> 00:06:46,697 Wrong answer. But thank you for playing. 130 00:06:48,217 --> 00:06:49,901 Come on. This is stupid. 131 00:06:50,026 --> 00:06:52,036 There it is again! You think I'm stupid! 132 00:06:52,204 --> 00:06:54,914 There's a difference between being stupid and acting stupid! 133 00:06:55,082 --> 00:06:58,042 Well, there's a difference between being a jerk and being an ass! 134 00:06:59,465 --> 00:07:01,692 No, there isn't! They're synonyms! 135 00:07:04,656 --> 00:07:06,806 Well, that was rather unpleasant. 136 00:07:07,090 --> 00:07:10,440 Yeah, I don't think I need my preshow urination anymore. 137 00:07:12,590 --> 00:07:15,512 When that woman moved in 3 years ago, I told you not to talk to her, 138 00:07:15,637 --> 00:07:17,561 and now, we're going to be late for the movies. 139 00:07:22,152 --> 00:07:25,068 Hey! Look! Amazing Spider-Man 183. 140 00:07:25,279 --> 00:07:26,279 Got it. 141 00:07:27,531 --> 00:07:29,843 Remember this one? Spider-Man loses a big fight 142 00:07:29,968 --> 00:07:32,242 and then his girlfriend breaks up with him. 143 00:07:35,651 --> 00:07:39,291 Want me to get it for you? It'll help take your mind off things. 144 00:07:39,756 --> 00:07:42,670 - Hey, guys. What's going on? - We need to kill a couple hours 145 00:07:42,838 --> 00:07:44,616 till the next showing of Time Bandits. 146 00:07:45,090 --> 00:07:48,508 No problem, I was thinking of closing early and going home, but... 147 00:07:48,947 --> 00:07:51,165 let's face it, that's just a slightly smaller lonely room 148 00:07:51,290 --> 00:07:52,928 filled with comic books. 149 00:07:54,468 --> 00:07:55,718 Thanks, Stuart. 150 00:07:57,444 --> 00:07:59,654 Let me ask you something. Do you think it's okay for Penny 151 00:07:59,779 --> 00:08:01,647 to have an ex-boyfriend sleep on her couch? 152 00:08:01,815 --> 00:08:04,122 - She's obviously way out of line. - Thank you! 153 00:08:04,526 --> 00:08:07,155 But if she dumps you, she'll have a new boyfriend by tomorrow morning 154 00:08:07,280 --> 00:08:10,489 and you'll have a new girlfriend when you figure out how to build one. 155 00:08:12,844 --> 00:08:15,661 So the only question is: how long until you fold? 156 00:08:16,156 --> 00:08:17,531 I am not going to fold. 157 00:08:17,656 --> 00:08:20,108 Well, excuse me, I don't think Penny's out of line at all. 158 00:08:20,233 --> 00:08:21,558 You don't own her. 159 00:08:21,907 --> 00:08:23,406 It's like my girl Beyoncé says: 160 00:08:23,531 --> 00:08:26,027 "If you like it, you shoulda put a ring on it." 161 00:08:28,550 --> 00:08:31,207 At the very least, when she found out Leonard was upset about it, 162 00:08:31,332 --> 00:08:32,720 she should've backed off. 163 00:08:32,888 --> 00:08:35,804 Like when a guy's upset cause his friend agreed to take a cooking class with him 164 00:08:35,929 --> 00:08:39,476 and then doesn't show up because he's doing a juice fast with his mother? 165 00:08:40,221 --> 00:08:42,072 I didn't know you were upset about that. 166 00:08:42,197 --> 00:08:44,102 Really! Did you miss all the subtle indicators, 167 00:08:44,227 --> 00:08:46,192 like me saying, "Howard, I am upset." 168 00:08:46,549 --> 00:08:48,903 - Okay, sorry. - Maybe it means something different. 169 00:08:49,071 --> 00:08:51,947 Back in India, it means you're upset with a guy named Howard! 170 00:08:52,115 --> 00:08:54,845 - I said I'm sorry. - Sorry doesn't make up for the fact 171 00:08:54,970 --> 00:08:57,409 that I had to make chicken and rice with this vegan guy. 172 00:08:57,534 --> 00:08:59,721 Do you know what vegan chicken and rice is? 173 00:08:59,846 --> 00:09:00,846 Rice! 174 00:09:01,785 --> 00:09:03,411 Well, you think I was having fun, 175 00:09:03,536 --> 00:09:05,571 sitting around all night listening to my mother say, 176 00:09:05,696 --> 00:09:08,248 "Have you ever peed so much in your life?" 177 00:09:09,007 --> 00:09:11,659 My God, you are such a mama's boy. 178 00:09:11,784 --> 00:09:15,345 - Hey, don't bring my mother into this! - You brought your mother into this! 179 00:09:15,709 --> 00:09:16,931 Stop it, both of you! 180 00:09:17,600 --> 00:09:20,097 All this fighting, I might as well be back with my parents! 181 00:09:20,222 --> 00:09:22,911 "Damn it, George, I told you if you didn't quit drinkin' I'd leave you!" 182 00:09:23,036 --> 00:09:24,693 "I guess that makes you a liar. 183 00:09:24,818 --> 00:09:26,732 "Cause I'm drunk as hell and you're still here!" 184 00:09:27,222 --> 00:09:29,484 "Stop yelling! You're making Sheldon cry!" 185 00:09:29,609 --> 00:09:31,348 "I'll tell you what's making Sheldon cry! 186 00:09:31,473 --> 00:09:33,197 "That I let you name him Sheldon!" 187 00:09:40,535 --> 00:09:42,385 Boy, what got him so upset? 188 00:09:43,476 --> 00:09:46,226 Oh, sure, you can tell when Sheldon's upset. 189 00:09:54,120 --> 00:09:56,136 Thank you very much. Come back soon. 190 00:09:57,231 --> 00:09:59,245 With the other half of my tip. 191 00:10:02,060 --> 00:10:04,353 Hey, Sheldon. What are you doing here? 192 00:10:04,562 --> 00:10:06,564 This is a restaurant. It's lunchtime. 193 00:10:06,689 --> 00:10:09,524 I would think, as a waitress, you'd be familiar with the paradigm. 194 00:10:10,127 --> 00:10:11,374 Is Leonard coming? 195 00:10:11,863 --> 00:10:15,405 I believe he is waiting for you to come crawling back to him and apologize. 196 00:10:15,790 --> 00:10:18,304 - That's not gonna happen. - I assumed that would be your attitude. 197 00:10:18,429 --> 00:10:20,494 - Hence, my true purpose in coming here. - Which is? 198 00:10:20,662 --> 00:10:23,205 I want you to crawl back to him and apologize. 199 00:10:23,587 --> 00:10:24,758 I'm busy. 200 00:10:24,883 --> 00:10:26,240 Excuse me, miss. 201 00:10:26,365 --> 00:10:28,080 I'd like to order lunch. 202 00:10:32,501 --> 00:10:34,967 - Fine. What do you want? - I have a few questions. 203 00:10:35,135 --> 00:10:38,011 First, I notice that you offer soup and a half-sandwich? 204 00:10:38,837 --> 00:10:41,693 Where exactly does the half-sandwich come from? 205 00:10:42,017 --> 00:10:44,226 Are you giving me half of someone else's sandwich, 206 00:10:44,942 --> 00:10:48,077 or do I have to wait for someone else to order the other half? 207 00:10:48,483 --> 00:10:50,565 No, Sheldon, they just make a half-sandwich. 208 00:10:50,734 --> 00:10:52,442 You can't make a half-sandwich. 209 00:10:52,612 --> 00:10:56,113 If it's not half of a whole sandwich, it's just a small sandwich. 210 00:10:56,629 --> 00:10:59,700 Fine, it's soup and a small sandwich. Is that what you want? 211 00:10:59,868 --> 00:11:01,967 Of course not. I'll have my usual. 212 00:11:02,977 --> 00:11:03,700 Great. 213 00:11:03,825 --> 00:11:05,789 Aren't you going to ask me if I want a beverage? 214 00:11:06,127 --> 00:11:07,564 Don't you usually get lemonade? 215 00:11:07,689 --> 00:11:08,876 Do you want lemonade? 216 00:11:09,087 --> 00:11:11,503 - Anything else? - I want you to apologize to Leonard. 217 00:11:12,961 --> 00:11:15,293 I am not going to apologize. I've done nothing wrong. 218 00:11:15,418 --> 00:11:17,318 - He is completely overreacting. - Irrelevant. 219 00:11:17,443 --> 00:11:20,629 The disruption in your relationship is making my life intolerable. 220 00:11:21,014 --> 00:11:23,724 Well, I'm sorry, Sheldon, but this really isn't about you. 221 00:11:24,694 --> 00:11:25,944 I don't follow. 222 00:11:27,512 --> 00:11:30,022 Yeah, yeah, I'll be right there. Look, Sheldon, I have to go. 223 00:11:30,190 --> 00:11:33,859 All right, let's assume, ad argumentum, that in this case, Leonard is wrong. 224 00:11:34,027 --> 00:11:35,402 Leonard is wrong. 225 00:11:35,570 --> 00:11:38,694 Considering the number of transgressions you've committed that he's overlooked, 226 00:11:38,819 --> 00:11:41,241 don't you think that, just this once, you could return the favor? 227 00:11:41,981 --> 00:11:43,493 I'm coming. Good-bye, Sheldon. 228 00:11:48,507 --> 00:11:50,906 What do you mean, transgressions I've committed? 229 00:11:51,631 --> 00:11:54,546 Were you under the impression Leonard has no complaints about you? 230 00:11:54,716 --> 00:11:55,846 Like what?! 231 00:11:55,971 --> 00:11:58,204 I see you, you're making a little check sign in the air. 232 00:11:58,329 --> 00:11:59,663 Just hold your horses. 233 00:12:00,820 --> 00:12:03,472 - What does Leonard complain about? - Your driving. 234 00:12:03,640 --> 00:12:05,454 The plethora of stuffed animals on your bed 235 00:12:05,579 --> 00:12:07,934 that stare at him during your amorous activities. 236 00:12:09,820 --> 00:12:11,813 Your constant tardiness, your singing. 237 00:12:11,983 --> 00:12:13,858 - My singing? - That's actually from my list. 238 00:12:13,983 --> 00:12:16,151 But Leonard would be a fool if he didn't agree with it. 239 00:12:16,846 --> 00:12:19,619 If Leonard has so many problems with me, why hasn't he just said so? 240 00:12:19,744 --> 00:12:22,240 Because, according to him, you're oversensitive and have a temper. 241 00:12:22,972 --> 00:12:24,826 Oh, really? Well, then, do me a favor 242 00:12:24,996 --> 00:12:27,244 and tell Leonard that he can drop dead! 243 00:12:31,502 --> 00:12:34,043 And she wonders why she's constantly undertipped. 244 00:12:39,697 --> 00:12:40,881 Good, you're home. 245 00:12:41,006 --> 00:12:42,775 - I need you to do me a favor. - Sure. 246 00:12:42,900 --> 00:12:44,500 Go apologize to Penny. 247 00:12:45,509 --> 00:12:47,476 - What?! - Right now would be good. 248 00:12:49,006 --> 00:12:51,186 Although, a few minutes ago would have been better. 249 00:12:52,026 --> 00:12:55,983 Seems you don't like my stuffed animals, my driving or my punctuality. 250 00:12:56,244 --> 00:12:58,318 What? Who would tell you something like that? 251 00:12:58,488 --> 00:13:00,654 Why would you tell her something like that? 252 00:13:00,948 --> 00:13:03,323 It doesn't matter why he told me. It's true, isn't it? 253 00:13:03,802 --> 00:13:06,279 Yeah, it's true, but I can live with that stuff. 254 00:13:06,404 --> 00:13:08,589 What I can't live with is you casually informing me 255 00:13:08,714 --> 00:13:11,665 that a guy's staying in your apartment without even asking me first! 256 00:13:12,049 --> 00:13:15,095 That isn't your problem! Your problem is you don't trust me! 257 00:13:16,129 --> 00:13:19,339 Sheldon, have you ever once heard me say that I don't trust Penny? 258 00:13:19,587 --> 00:13:21,466 Sheldon? Where did he go? 259 00:13:22,270 --> 00:13:24,669 Your yelling must have freaked him out again. 260 00:13:24,794 --> 00:13:27,681 Where are you going?! You walk away in the middle of an argument?! 261 00:13:27,849 --> 00:13:29,868 I'm gonna find your roommate before he hurts himself 262 00:13:29,993 --> 00:13:31,518 trying to cross the street! 263 00:13:32,387 --> 00:13:33,690 Why didn't you say so? 264 00:13:33,815 --> 00:13:35,801 Now I need your permission for that, too?! 265 00:13:35,926 --> 00:13:37,652 I can't read your mind, Penny! 266 00:13:37,777 --> 00:13:40,298 Really? Why not? You're so smart, and I'm so dumb! 267 00:13:47,689 --> 00:13:49,467 Stop knocking! It's open! 268 00:13:50,400 --> 00:13:52,581 Tell my parents that our dark matter research 269 00:13:52,749 --> 00:13:53,994 is at a critical juncture, 270 00:13:54,119 --> 00:13:56,042 and I can't come home for my cousin wedding. 271 00:13:57,337 --> 00:13:59,773 Ask our son what we're supposed to say to Mr. and Mrs. Cheldry, 272 00:13:59,898 --> 00:14:01,849 whose daughter, Lakshmi is flying in from London, 273 00:14:01,974 --> 00:14:03,650 for the sole purpose of meeting him. 274 00:14:03,886 --> 00:14:05,594 I didn't ask you to set me up with her. 275 00:14:05,763 --> 00:14:07,517 - You should be thanking us! - Yes. 276 00:14:07,642 --> 00:14:09,723 Lakshmi just got her stomach stapled. 277 00:14:11,309 --> 00:14:13,192 You have an opportunity to get in good with her 278 00:14:13,317 --> 00:14:15,687 before she loses weight, and her self-esteem goes up. 279 00:14:15,960 --> 00:14:17,147 I don't care! 280 00:14:17,477 --> 00:14:19,775 And why don't you think I can find a woman for myself? 281 00:14:19,960 --> 00:14:22,715 Because you're 27, and the closest thing we have to a daughter-in-law 282 00:14:22,840 --> 00:14:24,640 is that Jewish boy Howard. 283 00:14:25,593 --> 00:14:27,959 That is completely below the belt. 284 00:14:28,084 --> 00:14:31,084 Sheldon, tell my parents that Howard and I are just friends. 285 00:14:33,461 --> 00:14:35,461 Howard and I are just friends! 286 00:14:39,275 --> 00:14:41,375 Fine. I'll come home for Sanjay's wedding. 287 00:14:50,372 --> 00:14:52,766 What are you doing? He's not a lost dog. 288 00:14:53,462 --> 00:14:55,156 Why don't you just let me find him 289 00:14:55,281 --> 00:14:57,268 while you sit there hitting your imaginary brake? 290 00:14:58,209 --> 00:15:01,728 The brake might be imaginary, but that stop sign you just ran wasn't. 291 00:15:01,853 --> 00:15:02,900 What stop sign? 292 00:15:03,025 --> 00:15:04,775 Eyes on the road. Eyes on the road! 293 00:15:14,861 --> 00:15:18,382 Howard, answer the door! I'm busy! 294 00:15:18,950 --> 00:15:21,389 I'm busy, too! You answer it. 295 00:15:21,514 --> 00:15:23,922 I can't! I'm on the toilet! 296 00:15:24,966 --> 00:15:26,857 For God's sake, I don't need to hear that! 297 00:15:26,982 --> 00:15:29,032 Can't you just say, "I'm busy"? 298 00:15:29,332 --> 00:15:32,848 I said I'm busy, but that wasn't good enough for you! 299 00:15:33,237 --> 00:15:35,520 I hope it's one of those home invasion deals, 300 00:15:35,645 --> 00:15:37,242 and they shoot me in the head! 301 00:15:37,832 --> 00:15:41,740 Well, if it's a home invader, don't tell them I'm on the toilet! 302 00:15:46,333 --> 00:15:47,883 There's no one there. 303 00:15:48,348 --> 00:15:50,494 You're hearing things, you crazy old lady! 304 00:15:54,708 --> 00:15:56,458 Stuart, have you seen Sheldon? 305 00:15:56,584 --> 00:15:59,291 Yeah, he's over in the graphic novel section. 306 00:16:01,211 --> 00:16:03,086 Built himself a little nest. 307 00:16:03,869 --> 00:16:04,869 Thank you. 308 00:16:07,516 --> 00:16:09,467 - Is everything okay? - What do you mean? 309 00:16:10,022 --> 00:16:12,095 Sheldon told me you and Leonard were having a fight? 310 00:16:12,900 --> 00:16:15,457 Yeah, kind of. It's no big thing. 311 00:16:15,582 --> 00:16:16,582 Good, good. 312 00:16:17,672 --> 00:16:18,722 I love you. 313 00:16:20,563 --> 00:16:22,939 I'm not leaving until you talk to me. 314 00:16:23,108 --> 00:16:25,630 - What's going on? - It's a little hard to explain. 315 00:16:25,755 --> 00:16:28,592 He does this thing where he pretends he's in an alternate dimension 316 00:16:28,717 --> 00:16:30,845 that occupies the same physical space we're in, 317 00:16:30,970 --> 00:16:32,720 but he can't perceive us. 318 00:16:34,457 --> 00:16:37,307 Don't flatter yourself. I'm just ignoring you. 319 00:16:39,328 --> 00:16:42,080 Come on, Sheldon, let's go home. Look, we're done fighting. 320 00:16:42,252 --> 00:16:43,659 I've heard that before. 321 00:16:43,877 --> 00:16:46,143 But then, the next thing you know, I'm hiding in my bedroom, 322 00:16:46,268 --> 00:16:48,147 blaring a Richard Feynman lecture 323 00:16:48,272 --> 00:16:50,345 while my mom is shouting that Jesus would forgive her 324 00:16:50,470 --> 00:16:52,665 if she put ground glass in my dad's meatloaf. 325 00:16:54,128 --> 00:16:57,930 And my dad's on the roof skeet-shooting her Franklin Mint collectible plates. 326 00:16:59,785 --> 00:17:02,854 There's going to be no more shouting and no skeet-shooting. 327 00:17:03,138 --> 00:17:05,899 Really? Where's your friend Justin gonna sleep? 328 00:17:06,827 --> 00:17:08,499 Yeah... where's he gonna sleep? 329 00:17:08,624 --> 00:17:10,528 Oh, my God, would you let this go?! 330 00:17:10,698 --> 00:17:11,896 I'd let it go. 331 00:17:14,098 --> 00:17:15,266 Why should I let it go? 332 00:17:15,391 --> 00:17:17,577 Why don't you just tell the guy to find another place?! 333 00:17:19,497 --> 00:17:20,997 Oh, for God's sakes. 334 00:17:23,331 --> 00:17:25,205 So, you have childhood issues. 335 00:17:25,330 --> 00:17:27,174 We all have childhood issues. 336 00:17:27,299 --> 00:17:29,881 At some point, you just need to grow up and get past them. 337 00:17:30,161 --> 00:17:31,174 Fire! Fire! 338 00:17:32,506 --> 00:17:34,219 Will you just let me handle this, please? 339 00:17:44,374 --> 00:17:46,153 Please, try and understand. 340 00:17:46,278 --> 00:17:49,734 Leonard and I are in a relationship, and occasionally, we're going to fight. 341 00:17:50,343 --> 00:17:53,635 But no matter what happens between us, we will always love you. 342 00:17:56,206 --> 00:17:57,409 Right, Leonard? 343 00:17:58,149 --> 00:17:59,749 Always is a long time. 344 00:18:02,204 --> 00:18:03,354 Sure. Always. 345 00:18:04,359 --> 00:18:07,280 How about we buy you this robot, and then we all go home? 346 00:18:09,268 --> 00:18:10,568 I want that one. 347 00:18:11,811 --> 00:18:13,174 Okay, you can have that one. 348 00:18:13,597 --> 00:18:16,067 Come on, he's just going to play with it twice, 349 00:18:16,192 --> 00:18:19,114 and then it'll end up in his closet with all the other junk. 350 00:18:20,391 --> 00:18:21,599 Buy him the robot. 351 00:18:23,771 --> 00:18:25,519 Can I get this comic book, too? 352 00:18:25,855 --> 00:18:26,855 Yes, you can. 353 00:18:33,195 --> 00:18:34,195 We meet again. 354 00:18:43,001 --> 00:18:44,614 What did Justin say when you told him 355 00:18:44,739 --> 00:18:46,385 he couldn't sleep on your couch? 356 00:18:46,510 --> 00:18:47,564 He's a musician. 357 00:18:47,689 --> 00:18:50,100 He'll sleep in his own vomit, if he has to. 358 00:18:59,411 --> 00:19:03,000 I should have asked for much more than a comic book and a robot.