1 00:00:00,070 --> 00:00:01,600 English (HI) Subtitles. The Big Bang Theory S09E19 [KoTuWa] The Viewer Party Combustion 2 00:00:03,522 --> 00:00:06,356 (through static): I didn't understand your e-mail. 3 00:00:06,358 --> 00:00:09,426 Uh, can you repeat that? You're breaking up. 4 00:00:09,428 --> 00:00:12,529 I didn't understand your e-mail. 5 00:00:12,531 --> 00:00:15,499 Ah. Yeah, I had to get a little creative 6 00:00:15,501 --> 00:00:19,937 because the S, R and M keys on my laptop stopped working. 7 00:00:19,939 --> 00:00:22,940 "Deaw Aby, could you pleathe dwive be 8 00:00:22,942 --> 00:00:27,544 to the twain thtow thubtibe tobowow?" 9 00:00:28,514 --> 00:00:31,515 So, is that a yes? 10 00:00:31,517 --> 00:00:34,051 Sheldon, why don't you get a new computer? 11 00:00:34,053 --> 00:00:35,986 You know that one's out-of-date. 12 00:00:35,988 --> 00:00:38,222 Oh, but I like this computer. 13 00:00:38,224 --> 00:00:41,892 The video is failing, and the sound is cutting out. 14 00:00:41,894 --> 00:00:44,294 I'm sorry, I didn't get that. 15 00:00:44,296 --> 00:00:46,530 (through static): The video is failing, 16 00:00:46,532 --> 00:00:48,665 and the sound is cutting out. 17 00:00:48,667 --> 00:00:52,870 I'm sorry, one more time. The sound is cutting out. 18 00:00:56,442 --> 00:00:57,775 I can't read that! 19 00:00:57,777 --> 00:00:59,910 The video is failing! 20 00:00:59,912 --> 00:01:03,147 (through static): Get a new computer. 21 00:01:03,149 --> 00:01:04,314 What? 22 00:01:04,316 --> 00:01:06,416 (through static): Get a new computer. 23 00:01:06,418 --> 00:01:08,152 What?! 24 00:01:08,154 --> 00:01:10,888 (phone rings) 25 00:01:10,890 --> 00:01:11,889 Hello? 26 00:01:11,891 --> 00:01:14,057 Get a new computer! 27 00:01:14,059 --> 00:01:17,694 ♪ Our whole universe was in a hot, dense state ♪ 28 00:01:17,696 --> 00:01:21,031 ♪ Then nearly 14 billion years ago expansion started... Wait! ♪ 29 00:01:21,033 --> 00:01:22,666 ♪ The Earth began to cool ♪ 30 00:01:22,668 --> 00:01:25,202 ♪ The autotrophs began to drool, Neanderthals developed tools ♪ 31 00:01:25,204 --> 00:01:27,871 ♪ We built the Wall ♪ ♪ We built the pyramids ♪ 32 00:01:27,873 --> 00:01:30,541 ♪ Math, Science, History, unraveling the mystery ♪ 33 00:01:30,543 --> 00:01:32,442 ♪ That all started with a big bang ♪ 34 00:01:32,444 --> 00:01:34,411 ♪ Bang! ♪ 35 00:01:34,435 --> 00:01:38,435 ♪ The Big Bang Theory 9x19 ♪ The Solder Excursion Diversion Original Air Date on March 31, 2016 36 00:01:38,436 --> 00:01:40,294 == sync, corrected by elderman == @elder_man 37 00:01:42,966 --> 00:01:44,365 This is cool. 38 00:01:44,367 --> 00:01:46,434 When was the last time you and I built something together? 39 00:01:46,436 --> 00:01:49,136 Scientifically? A little over a year ago. 40 00:01:49,138 --> 00:01:51,439 LEGOs? Last week in my room. 41 00:01:51,441 --> 00:01:53,975 If there was a Nobrize for Millennium Falcons 42 00:01:53,977 --> 00:01:56,944 that fall apart when you pick them up, we'd be set. 43 00:01:56,946 --> 00:01:58,224 Hey, guys! 44 00:01:58,225 --> 00:01:58,745 BOTH: Hey. 45 00:01:58,881 --> 00:01:59,981 What are you doing here? 46 00:01:59,983 --> 00:02:01,616 We heard there were some sexy scientists 47 00:02:01,618 --> 00:02:03,517 working hard all weekend. Yeah, 48 00:02:03,519 --> 00:02:06,988 so we brought you some lunch and we are gonna go look for 'em. 49 00:02:06,990 --> 00:02:09,023 Soup, sandwiches and emasculation, 50 00:02:09,025 --> 00:02:11,259 just like my mom used to make. 51 00:02:11,261 --> 00:02:12,493 So, how's it goin'? 52 00:02:12,495 --> 00:02:13,995 Good. Slow. 53 00:02:13,997 --> 00:02:15,730 There's a lot of tedious setup, but once we get through that 54 00:02:15,732 --> 00:02:16,731 it should go quicker. 55 00:02:16,733 --> 00:02:18,466 Is there anything we can do to help? 56 00:02:18,468 --> 00:02:20,601 You know what, this part isn't that technical. 57 00:02:20,603 --> 00:02:21,702 You actually could. 58 00:02:21,704 --> 00:02:25,006 Wow, really? Called my bluff. All righty then. 59 00:02:25,008 --> 00:02:27,008 Can we really help? 60 00:02:27,010 --> 00:02:28,509 While we finish soldering these boards, it'd be great 61 00:02:28,511 --> 00:02:31,045 if you guys could wrap these pipe fittings with Teflon tape. 62 00:02:31,047 --> 00:02:32,046 I'll show you how to do one. 63 00:02:32,048 --> 00:02:33,681 Hey, w-wouldn't it be funny 64 00:02:33,683 --> 00:02:35,249 if after all your years of hard work, 65 00:02:35,251 --> 00:02:38,286 I'm the one who makes a scientific breakthrough? 66 00:02:41,624 --> 00:02:44,859 He doesn't think that's funny. 67 00:02:46,095 --> 00:02:48,262 (static crackling) 68 00:02:49,232 --> 00:02:50,898 (gasps) 69 00:02:50,900 --> 00:02:53,067 (sighs) 70 00:02:56,973 --> 00:02:58,639 (knocking) 71 00:02:58,641 --> 00:03:01,008 I got here as quickly as I could. 72 00:03:01,010 --> 00:03:03,311 You're too late. 73 00:03:08,084 --> 00:03:10,718 ("Taps" playing) 74 00:03:22,165 --> 00:03:24,398 Sheldon, this is silly. 75 00:03:24,400 --> 00:03:27,735 You got emotional when that lab monkey died. 76 00:03:27,737 --> 00:03:31,672 That lab monkey told me he loved me in sign language. 77 00:03:31,674 --> 00:03:33,941 ♪ ♪ 78 00:03:40,583 --> 00:03:41,916 ("Taps" ends) 79 00:03:41,918 --> 00:03:43,217 Great. 80 00:03:43,219 --> 00:03:46,554 Now I'm gonna have that song in my head all day. 81 00:03:47,457 --> 00:03:48,856 Look, I'm-I'm sorry 82 00:03:48,858 --> 00:03:51,192 for your loss, but I think 83 00:03:51,194 --> 00:03:54,061 I have something that might make you feel better. 84 00:03:54,063 --> 00:03:57,231 I got you a new computer! 85 00:03:58,968 --> 00:04:01,335 How could you do that? 86 00:04:01,337 --> 00:04:03,170 Do what? 87 00:04:03,172 --> 00:04:06,374 Choosing a new laptop is an incredibly personal ritual. 88 00:04:06,376 --> 00:04:07,742 You have taken away 89 00:04:07,744 --> 00:04:10,611 weeks of agonizing thought, tedious research, 90 00:04:10,613 --> 00:04:13,981 sleepless nights filled with indecision. I j... 91 00:04:14,817 --> 00:04:16,984 Haven't I lost enough today? 92 00:04:18,287 --> 00:04:22,890 Well, the guy at the store said this one is great. 93 00:04:22,892 --> 00:04:24,859 Oh! Oh, the guy! 94 00:04:24,861 --> 00:04:26,827 Oh, pardon me. 95 00:04:26,829 --> 00:04:28,462 I-I didn't realize you'd spoken to the guy. 96 00:04:28,464 --> 00:04:30,030 Yeah, tell me, 97 00:04:30,032 --> 00:04:32,600 did the guy choose one with a 4K display 98 00:04:32,602 --> 00:04:34,001 and a Thunderbolt port? 99 00:04:34,003 --> 00:04:35,202 Yes. Yeah? 100 00:04:35,204 --> 00:04:36,370 D-Did the guy make sure 101 00:04:36,372 --> 00:04:39,140 that this has a one-terabyte solid-state drive? 102 00:04:39,142 --> 00:04:40,674 Yes. Yeah? Oh, well, 103 00:04:40,676 --> 00:04:43,878 was this guy Rick from Computer Solutions on Colorado? 104 00:04:43,880 --> 00:04:44,845 Yes. 105 00:04:44,847 --> 00:04:46,213 Yeah, well, he does know his stuff. 106 00:04:49,252 --> 00:04:51,085 After you wrap the body in reflective tape, 107 00:04:51,087 --> 00:04:53,254 the ends get Teflon tape so we can get a tight seal. 108 00:04:53,256 --> 00:04:55,389 Like this? Oh. Yeah, perfect. 109 00:04:55,391 --> 00:04:57,124 And it helps to have small, delicate fingers. 110 00:04:57,126 --> 00:04:58,726 So don't be discouraged if you can't do it as fast 111 00:04:58,728 --> 00:05:00,361 as me and Howard. (chuckles) 112 00:05:01,697 --> 00:05:03,063 I don't know if we have enough solder 113 00:05:03,065 --> 00:05:04,298 to finish these circuit boards. 114 00:05:04,300 --> 00:05:05,529 We had a full spool yesterday. 115 00:05:05,530 --> 00:05:06,331 What can I say, 116 00:05:06,335 --> 00:05:08,936 I play hard, I solder even harder. 117 00:05:10,506 --> 00:05:12,506 Sometimes he solders at home with his shirt off. 118 00:05:12,508 --> 00:05:14,508 It's like a beer commercial. 119 00:05:14,510 --> 00:05:16,243 (blows, clicks tongue) 120 00:05:17,213 --> 00:05:19,213 Well, we got to make a run to the hardware store. 121 00:05:19,215 --> 00:05:21,515 How can you call yourself a scientist and run out of solder? 122 00:05:21,517 --> 00:05:24,318 Well, funny story. So, we have plenty 123 00:05:24,320 --> 00:05:26,253 of the 60/40 tin-to-lead ratio solder, 124 00:05:26,255 --> 00:05:28,915 but the spools look a lot like the 63/37 tin-to... 125 00:05:28,916 --> 00:05:29,555 Honey, honey, 126 00:05:29,559 --> 00:05:32,960 honey, let me stop you. That is-is not a funny story. 127 00:05:34,096 --> 00:05:35,830 You want to come with us? 128 00:05:35,832 --> 00:05:37,355 I'm kind of getting into the groove here. 129 00:05:37,356 --> 00:05:37,976 Yeah, you guys run 130 00:05:38,000 --> 00:05:40,821 to the store and let the women handle the science for a change. 131 00:05:40,822 --> 00:05:41,500 LEONARD: Okay. 132 00:05:41,504 --> 00:05:43,537 We'll be back as soon as we can. 133 00:05:43,539 --> 00:05:46,807 (clears throat) Okay, so what... 134 00:05:46,809 --> 00:05:49,009 is solder? 135 00:05:51,180 --> 00:05:54,148 I suppose I should set this up. 136 00:05:54,150 --> 00:05:57,785 Or would you like to rob me of that, too? 137 00:05:57,787 --> 00:06:00,754 Knock it off or I'll start making W-H sounds 138 00:06:00,756 --> 00:06:03,791 for words that just have a W. 139 00:06:03,793 --> 00:06:04,425 You wouldn't. 140 00:06:04,427 --> 00:06:07,761 "Hwatch" me. 141 00:06:08,664 --> 00:06:10,064 Fine. I'm sorry. 142 00:06:10,066 --> 00:06:11,932 Thank you for the thoughtful gift. 143 00:06:11,934 --> 00:06:13,534 I really do appreciate it. 144 00:06:13,536 --> 00:06:17,938 As you know, I had become attached to my old laptop. 145 00:06:17,940 --> 00:06:19,473 But I'm sure, in time, that this one will... 146 00:06:19,475 --> 00:06:21,408 (gasps) Jeepers creepers, 147 00:06:21,410 --> 00:06:23,611 that started up fast! 148 00:06:23,613 --> 00:06:25,646 I thought you might like it. 149 00:06:25,648 --> 00:06:27,848 Look at the 4K resolution. 150 00:06:27,850 --> 00:06:29,617 Next time we Skype, I'm gonna count 151 00:06:29,619 --> 00:06:32,620 all those nostril hairs. 152 00:06:32,622 --> 00:06:35,256 Or you could just look into my eyes. 153 00:06:35,258 --> 00:06:37,358 But you only have two eyes. 154 00:06:37,360 --> 00:06:40,494 You got a lot of nostril hairs. 155 00:06:40,496 --> 00:06:42,987 Well, you know, as long as you're happy. 156 00:06:43,011 --> 00:06:44,533 Oh. 157 00:06:44,534 --> 00:06:46,000 I am. (chuckles) 158 00:06:46,002 --> 00:06:48,636 And Rick said you could bring in your old one to recycle it. 159 00:06:48,638 --> 00:06:51,539 Oh. Uh, no, no, no, thank you. 160 00:06:51,541 --> 00:06:53,140 Oh, but he said you can get store credit. 161 00:06:53,142 --> 00:06:55,809 Well, no, I just... I-I don't want to recycle it. 162 00:06:55,811 --> 00:06:57,411 And I don't want store credit. 163 00:06:57,413 --> 00:06:58,312 But why wouldn't... 164 00:06:58,314 --> 00:07:00,147 Can we please change the subject? 165 00:07:00,149 --> 00:07:02,716 O-Okay. 166 00:07:02,718 --> 00:07:06,053 How 'bout we change it to why you're being weird about this? 167 00:07:06,055 --> 00:07:07,154 I'm not being weird. 168 00:07:07,156 --> 00:07:09,390 I... 169 00:07:09,392 --> 00:07:11,392 It's hard to explain. 170 00:07:11,394 --> 00:07:15,296 Sheldon, just tell me. 171 00:07:16,165 --> 00:07:18,198 It might be easier to show you. 172 00:07:18,200 --> 00:07:20,367 Okay. 173 00:07:21,237 --> 00:07:23,804 We'd have to take your car. 174 00:07:23,806 --> 00:07:25,973 All right. 175 00:07:28,344 --> 00:07:31,979 And I'm gonna need you to sign a nondisclosure agreement. 176 00:07:32,949 --> 00:07:36,317 Well, I signed one before we slept together. 177 00:07:36,319 --> 00:07:38,485 Why not now? 178 00:07:42,525 --> 00:07:45,392 Penny says they're having fun working on the prototype. 179 00:07:45,394 --> 00:07:49,063 Remember when her fun was nightclubs and drinking games? 180 00:07:49,065 --> 00:07:51,699 I know. I'm lowering the bar so slowly. 181 00:07:51,701 --> 00:07:54,835 This time next year she'll have a coin collection. 182 00:07:54,837 --> 00:07:56,236 Excuse me. 183 00:07:56,238 --> 00:07:58,505 You guys interested in a free screening of an upcoming movie? 184 00:07:58,507 --> 00:07:59,406 Oh. Sorry, we can't. 185 00:07:59,408 --> 00:08:01,375 Well, hang on. What movie is it? 186 00:08:01,377 --> 00:08:04,178 Oh, I can't tell you. But it does star Will Smith. 187 00:08:04,180 --> 00:08:06,046 Wait. 188 00:08:06,048 --> 00:08:07,481 I bet it's Suicide Squad. 189 00:08:07,483 --> 00:08:09,283 Let's check it out. 190 00:08:09,285 --> 00:08:10,484 What about the girls? 191 00:08:10,486 --> 00:08:12,286 Penny just said they're having fun. 192 00:08:12,288 --> 00:08:14,822 Honestly, you want to wrap tape around a bunch of pipe fittings 193 00:08:14,824 --> 00:08:16,290 all afternoon? 194 00:08:17,259 --> 00:08:18,492 Okay, we'll take 'em. 195 00:08:18,494 --> 00:08:20,327 Okay. But, I swear, 196 00:08:20,329 --> 00:08:22,329 if it's Will Smith in Shark Tale 2, 197 00:08:22,331 --> 00:08:25,699 it better be at least as good as the original. 198 00:08:26,936 --> 00:08:28,602 I mean, it's crazy, isn't it? 199 00:08:28,604 --> 00:08:30,738 I moved here from Nebraska to be an actress, 200 00:08:30,740 --> 00:08:33,707 and now I'm sitting in an engineering lab at Caltech 201 00:08:33,709 --> 00:08:37,911 helping to build a prototype for a high-tech guidance system. 202 00:08:37,913 --> 00:08:39,913 It is crazy. It's also crazy 203 00:08:39,915 --> 00:08:43,417 that I've made 14 of these and you've made three. 204 00:08:43,419 --> 00:08:45,452 (knocking) 205 00:08:46,355 --> 00:08:48,822 Hey. Where are the guys? 206 00:08:48,824 --> 00:08:50,224 Oh, they went to the store to get solder, 207 00:08:50,226 --> 00:08:53,827 which is metal you melt to make science things. 208 00:08:54,730 --> 00:08:56,330 Since when do you work on weekends? 209 00:08:56,332 --> 00:08:57,831 I'm an astrophysicist. 210 00:08:57,833 --> 00:09:00,100 The stars don't take a day off. 211 00:09:00,102 --> 00:09:02,903 You were home alone and had no one to play with? 212 00:09:02,905 --> 00:09:06,173 Well, the cleaning lady was there, but she doesn't like me. 213 00:09:07,343 --> 00:09:08,709 You need any help? 214 00:09:08,711 --> 00:09:11,345 Not with Lightning McQueen here. 215 00:09:11,347 --> 00:09:13,080 I think we're good. 216 00:09:13,082 --> 00:09:14,648 Okay. That's cool. 217 00:09:14,650 --> 00:09:16,984 I guess everybody's involved in this project but me. 218 00:09:16,986 --> 00:09:19,753 So... see ya. 219 00:09:19,755 --> 00:09:22,423 (door shuts) 220 00:09:22,425 --> 00:09:23,457 I feel bad. 221 00:09:23,459 --> 00:09:24,525 Should we have asked him to stay? 222 00:09:24,527 --> 00:09:26,694 KOOTHRAPPALI (high-pitched): Yes. 223 00:09:29,865 --> 00:09:32,266 Will you please tell me where we're going? 224 00:09:32,268 --> 00:09:35,936 Sorry, you're on a need-to-know basis. 225 00:09:36,872 --> 00:09:38,172 I'm driving the car. 226 00:09:38,174 --> 00:09:40,541 I need to know. 227 00:09:40,543 --> 00:09:41,608 Right. 228 00:09:41,610 --> 00:09:43,310 So where are we going? 229 00:09:43,312 --> 00:09:46,814 No, I meant turn right, and you missed it. 230 00:09:46,816 --> 00:09:49,483 Maybe you do need to know. 231 00:09:51,787 --> 00:09:53,821 (indistinct chatter) 232 00:09:53,823 --> 00:09:55,022 What are we gonna tell the girls? 233 00:09:55,024 --> 00:09:56,190 It's not a problem. 234 00:09:56,192 --> 00:09:57,324 I mean without lying. 235 00:09:57,326 --> 00:09:59,693 And now you've made it a problem. 236 00:09:59,695 --> 00:10:01,762 Come on. We're a couple of smart guys. 237 00:10:01,764 --> 00:10:03,630 I'm sure we can come up with a way to explain this 238 00:10:03,632 --> 00:10:05,299 that doesn't make us look bad. 239 00:10:05,301 --> 00:10:07,167 (phone chimes) 240 00:10:07,169 --> 00:10:09,103 Oh! 241 00:10:09,105 --> 00:10:10,904 The boys had to drive all the way to San Bernardino 242 00:10:10,906 --> 00:10:12,740 for the solder and got a flat. 243 00:10:14,810 --> 00:10:15,843 (phone chimes) 244 00:10:15,845 --> 00:10:18,245 They bought it. 245 00:10:18,247 --> 00:10:19,813 But we're gonna have to 246 00:10:19,815 --> 00:10:21,448 put the spare on before we go back. 247 00:10:21,450 --> 00:10:23,150 Oh, you're good at this. 248 00:10:23,152 --> 00:10:25,486 Well, I lie a lot. 249 00:10:26,322 --> 00:10:27,988 MAN: Hey, guys, thank you 250 00:10:27,990 --> 00:10:29,923 for being a part of our test screening. You're about 251 00:10:29,925 --> 00:10:32,626 to be one of the first audiences to see Suicide Squad. 252 00:10:32,628 --> 00:10:34,595 (applause and cheering) Hey! 253 00:10:34,597 --> 00:10:35,863 (laughs) You were right. 254 00:10:35,865 --> 00:10:36,997 Oh, I keep telling you-- 255 00:10:36,999 --> 00:10:40,534 good things happen to bad people. 256 00:10:40,536 --> 00:10:42,569 Uh, we're gonna get started in a couple minutes. Enjoy. 257 00:10:42,571 --> 00:10:44,638 Who are you texting? 258 00:10:44,640 --> 00:10:47,074 Raj. He really wants to see this movie. 259 00:10:47,076 --> 00:10:49,042 Oh, he'll never make it in time. 260 00:10:49,044 --> 00:10:51,912 I know. I want to make him feel bad. 261 00:10:53,282 --> 00:10:56,750 "Ha, ha. Leonard and I are about to see Suicide Squad. 262 00:10:56,752 --> 00:11:00,587 Spoiler alert: when I see you I'm gonna spoil it." 263 00:11:00,589 --> 00:11:02,456 You're a good friend. 264 00:11:02,458 --> 00:11:04,124 (chuckles) 265 00:11:04,126 --> 00:11:06,393 (phone chimes) 266 00:11:10,099 --> 00:11:12,432 Okay. (clears throat) 267 00:11:13,569 --> 00:11:18,238 Would you ladies please leave the room for a moment? 268 00:11:18,240 --> 00:11:20,174 Why? 269 00:11:20,176 --> 00:11:24,144 I need to rub my genitals on their prototype. 270 00:11:24,146 --> 00:11:26,446 What's going on? 271 00:11:26,448 --> 00:11:28,816 Leonard and Howard don't have a flat. 272 00:11:28,818 --> 00:11:31,018 They went to the movies. Look. 273 00:11:31,954 --> 00:11:33,687 Son of a bitch. Un-freakin' believable. 274 00:11:33,689 --> 00:11:35,956 Oh. You know what? I'm gonna let them know 275 00:11:35,958 --> 00:11:38,258 that I'm here with you and that they're busted. 276 00:11:38,260 --> 00:11:39,560 No. You know what? Don't. Don't. 277 00:11:39,562 --> 00:11:41,061 Let's let them think they're getting away with it. 278 00:11:41,063 --> 00:11:44,131 Yeah, let's see how deep a hole they can dig for themselves. 279 00:11:44,133 --> 00:11:45,599 Mm-hmm. Interesting. 280 00:11:45,601 --> 00:11:47,734 I mean, it's not testicles on a cryostat, 281 00:11:47,736 --> 00:11:49,937 but I like it. 282 00:11:58,121 --> 00:12:00,288 Why do you have a storage unit? 283 00:12:00,290 --> 00:12:02,257 Just wait. 284 00:12:02,259 --> 00:12:04,359 How long have you had it? 285 00:12:05,996 --> 00:12:07,195 Just wait. 286 00:12:07,732 --> 00:12:09,932 Do you want me to hold that computer? 287 00:12:09,934 --> 00:12:12,768 Just wai... You know what? Actually, yes, thank you. 288 00:12:20,711 --> 00:12:24,013 Welcome to my Fortress of Shame. 289 00:12:29,053 --> 00:12:30,286 I'm sorry. 290 00:12:30,288 --> 00:12:32,588 What-what am I looking at? 291 00:12:32,590 --> 00:12:35,925 It's basically everything I've ever owned. 292 00:12:35,927 --> 00:12:38,727 Um, every book, 293 00:12:38,729 --> 00:12:42,731 every T-shirt, every piece of broken electronics. 294 00:12:42,733 --> 00:12:45,901 Just... all of it. 295 00:12:48,806 --> 00:12:51,407 All of it? 296 00:12:51,409 --> 00:12:53,309 I have a Ziploc bag 297 00:12:53,311 --> 00:12:56,479 filled with all my old Ziploc bags. 298 00:13:02,453 --> 00:13:05,187 Okay. 299 00:13:05,189 --> 00:13:07,256 Well... 300 00:13:07,258 --> 00:13:09,325 I would like to tell you 301 00:13:09,327 --> 00:13:12,094 that there is 302 00:13:12,096 --> 00:13:16,065 nothing here to be ashamed of. 303 00:13:17,301 --> 00:13:19,468 So I'm gonna need a minute. 304 00:13:24,275 --> 00:13:27,176 All right, how are we gonna play this when they return? 305 00:13:27,178 --> 00:13:28,644 I know. 306 00:13:28,646 --> 00:13:31,814 You guys should totally be making out with me. 307 00:13:33,951 --> 00:13:36,352 Sweetie, I know you think jokes like that are funny, 308 00:13:36,354 --> 00:13:38,087 but do you really think you could handle 309 00:13:38,089 --> 00:13:39,522 making out with both of us? 310 00:13:41,192 --> 00:13:42,525 No, ma'am. 311 00:13:45,129 --> 00:13:47,530 Okay. Okay, how about this? 312 00:13:47,532 --> 00:13:48,631 They don't know you're here with us, 313 00:13:48,633 --> 00:13:50,866 so you hide in the closet. When they show up, 314 00:13:50,868 --> 00:13:52,434 we'll hear whatever their dumb story is 315 00:13:52,436 --> 00:13:54,270 about where they were, we'll pretend to believe them, 316 00:13:54,272 --> 00:13:57,006 and just when they think they got away with it, you jump out. 317 00:13:57,008 --> 00:13:58,908 Yeah, that's pretty good. I love it! 318 00:13:58,910 --> 00:14:01,143 I'll be all like, "Busted!" 319 00:14:01,145 --> 00:14:02,611 And they'll be like, "What?!" 320 00:14:02,613 --> 00:14:05,648 And then we'll all be like, "Oh, yeah!" 321 00:14:07,051 --> 00:14:08,384 Yeah, I-I get it. 322 00:14:08,386 --> 00:14:10,586 I wouldn't make out with me, either. 323 00:14:12,924 --> 00:14:15,891 In here is every clock radio I've ever owned. 324 00:14:15,893 --> 00:14:17,793 Calculators, VHS tapes. 325 00:14:17,795 --> 00:14:19,195 Yeah. Oh. 326 00:14:19,197 --> 00:14:21,397 Sporting equipment. 327 00:14:23,401 --> 00:14:25,634 Y-You have sporting equipment? 328 00:14:25,636 --> 00:14:27,970 Well, oh, it's just a... it's a... a golf ball 329 00:14:27,972 --> 00:14:29,972 that my brother threw at my head. 330 00:14:29,974 --> 00:14:32,741 You can still feel the dent. 331 00:14:32,743 --> 00:14:36,011 It's right next to the hockey puck dent. 332 00:14:38,382 --> 00:14:40,950 Okay, why do you have a bin of pinecones? 333 00:14:40,952 --> 00:14:43,385 I used to collect them as a child. 334 00:14:43,387 --> 00:14:45,688 The spiral of scales open in 335 00:14:45,690 --> 00:14:47,423 the Fibonacci sequence. 336 00:14:47,425 --> 00:14:49,325 A fact that, when you tell your brother, 337 00:14:49,327 --> 00:14:52,261 gets a golf ball thrown at your head. 338 00:14:54,565 --> 00:14:59,134 So, why do you feel you need to save these things? 339 00:14:59,136 --> 00:15:01,370 I'd like to say it's nostalgia, 340 00:15:01,372 --> 00:15:04,440 but every time I think of throwing anything away, 341 00:15:04,442 --> 00:15:06,008 my ears start to ring, 342 00:15:06,010 --> 00:15:08,210 and I get butterflies in my stomach. 343 00:15:08,212 --> 00:15:09,678 And then it feels like 344 00:15:09,680 --> 00:15:11,880 the butterflies get eaten by rats, 345 00:15:11,882 --> 00:15:14,116 and then, the-the rats get eaten by... 346 00:15:14,118 --> 00:15:15,084 Okay. 347 00:15:15,086 --> 00:15:16,719 I get it. I get it. 348 00:15:16,721 --> 00:15:19,622 It ends with dinosaurs. 349 00:15:21,659 --> 00:15:24,426 I'm sorry if you think less of me. 350 00:15:25,329 --> 00:15:27,263 I don't. 351 00:15:27,265 --> 00:15:29,064 Really? 352 00:15:29,066 --> 00:15:31,066 'Cause every time I come in here, 353 00:15:31,068 --> 00:15:32,968 I think less of me. 354 00:15:32,970 --> 00:15:34,336 Why? 355 00:15:34,338 --> 00:15:36,171 Because I'm a fraud. 356 00:15:36,173 --> 00:15:37,606 No. I purport 357 00:15:37,608 --> 00:15:39,441 to be a man of the mind. 358 00:15:39,443 --> 00:15:43,178 I've been such a-a vocal champion of The Singularity, 359 00:15:43,180 --> 00:15:45,014 but how can I leave my body behind 360 00:15:45,016 --> 00:15:47,283 and become one with the Internet 361 00:15:47,285 --> 00:15:49,985 when I've never even thrown a toothbrush away? 362 00:15:52,189 --> 00:15:53,989 It's okay, Sheldon. 363 00:15:53,991 --> 00:15:57,426 You know, I... I've saved a lot of weird things, too. 364 00:15:57,428 --> 00:15:59,628 Like what? 365 00:15:59,630 --> 00:16:01,563 Well, um, 366 00:16:01,565 --> 00:16:04,967 did you know I have a microscope slide 367 00:16:04,969 --> 00:16:06,402 with a little bit of tissue 368 00:16:06,404 --> 00:16:09,405 from the first brain I ever dissected? 369 00:16:09,407 --> 00:16:11,607 I have an old teddy bear 370 00:16:11,609 --> 00:16:14,209 I secretly wiped my nose on for years. 371 00:16:21,118 --> 00:16:23,686 It's not a contest. 372 00:16:25,956 --> 00:16:28,524 Okay, here they come. Go hide. 373 00:16:28,526 --> 00:16:30,592 Oh, man, when I come out of the closet, 374 00:16:30,594 --> 00:16:33,195 I'm gonna nail those guys! 375 00:16:35,299 --> 00:16:37,299 Yeah, I heard it. Shut up. 376 00:16:42,740 --> 00:16:44,039 Hey. Hi. 377 00:16:44,041 --> 00:16:46,075 Hey, what's this? 378 00:16:46,077 --> 00:16:48,010 Listen, we did a stupid thing. 379 00:16:48,012 --> 00:16:51,814 We went to a movie and lied about it, but we feel bad 380 00:16:51,816 --> 00:16:53,515 and want to make it up to you. 381 00:16:53,517 --> 00:16:55,284 So, these are for you, and if you're not too mad, 382 00:16:55,286 --> 00:16:56,511 we'd love to take you guys to dinner. 383 00:16:56,512 --> 00:16:57,040 WOLOWITZ: Yeah. 384 00:16:57,054 --> 00:16:59,455 Anywhere you want. Oh. Well, 385 00:16:59,457 --> 00:17:01,557 thank you for being honest. PENNY: Yeah. You know, 386 00:17:01,559 --> 00:17:03,025 I want to be upset, but we did 387 00:17:03,027 --> 00:17:04,493 kind of have fun working on the prototype. 388 00:17:04,495 --> 00:17:06,662 KOOTHRAPPALI: Don't forgive them! Stay mad at them! 389 00:17:08,065 --> 00:17:10,132 What is he doing in there? 390 00:17:10,134 --> 00:17:13,268 Busting you! 391 00:17:14,538 --> 00:17:15,938 It's okay. They apologized. 392 00:17:15,940 --> 00:17:17,106 Yeah, it's fine. 393 00:17:17,108 --> 00:17:21,243 Well this is kind of anti-climactic. 394 00:17:22,246 --> 00:17:23,846 You know what wasn't anti-climactic? 395 00:17:23,848 --> 00:17:25,547 The end of the movie. Get this. 396 00:17:25,549 --> 00:17:27,616 No spoilers! No spoilers! 397 00:17:28,486 --> 00:17:30,652 And he's back in the closet. 398 00:17:32,022 --> 00:17:34,590 Ready for dinner? 399 00:17:34,592 --> 00:17:36,792 Yeah. 400 00:17:38,796 --> 00:17:40,529 Should we invite Raj? 401 00:17:40,531 --> 00:17:42,865 KOOTHRAPPALI (high-pitched): Yes. 402 00:17:45,035 --> 00:17:47,302 So, no one else knows about this? 403 00:17:47,304 --> 00:17:49,505 Only you. 404 00:17:51,108 --> 00:17:53,709 Thank you for trusting me. 405 00:17:53,711 --> 00:17:55,711 What good is having a girlfriend 406 00:17:55,713 --> 00:17:58,447 if you can't unload your psychological sewage on her? 407 00:17:59,850 --> 00:18:02,451 That's me, your emotional outhouse. 408 00:18:04,188 --> 00:18:06,088 You know, 409 00:18:06,090 --> 00:18:09,758 if you ever decide you want to do something about this, 410 00:18:09,760 --> 00:18:11,427 I'm-I'm here for you. 411 00:18:11,429 --> 00:18:13,695 Thank you. 412 00:18:13,697 --> 00:18:15,998 I wouldn't even know how to begin. 413 00:18:16,000 --> 00:18:18,634 Baby steps, I guess. 414 00:18:18,636 --> 00:18:21,103 Mm. 415 00:18:27,578 --> 00:18:30,712 I suppose I could try getting rid of the golf ball. 416 00:18:31,515 --> 00:18:33,449 Oh. Okay. 417 00:18:34,452 --> 00:18:37,286 I will always have the dent to remember it by. 418 00:18:46,163 --> 00:18:49,331 (sighs heavily) 419 00:18:52,937 --> 00:18:54,636 You did it. 420 00:18:54,638 --> 00:18:56,839 Do you feel okay? 421 00:18:57,875 --> 00:19:00,042 Actually, yes. 422 00:19:01,245 --> 00:19:02,678 I do. 423 00:19:03,581 --> 00:19:05,380 Well, I'm proud of you. 424 00:19:05,382 --> 00:19:07,583 Oh. Thanks. 425 00:19:24,565 --> 00:19:28,300 I'm glad I told you about the storage unit. 426 00:19:28,302 --> 00:19:30,202 Well, I feel closer to you now. 427 00:19:30,857 --> 00:19:33,024 Oh, I feel closer to you, too. 428 00:19:33,026 --> 00:19:34,292 You know, 429 00:19:34,294 --> 00:19:37,929 it's still a couple of hours until my bedtime. 430 00:19:44,704 --> 00:19:47,338 What did you have in mind? 431 00:19:47,340 --> 00:19:49,774 You look amazing. 432 00:19:53,246 --> 00:19:57,815 I mean, this resolution is remarkable. 433 00:19:58,752 --> 00:20:02,287 I really had to go home for this? 434 00:20:02,289 --> 00:20:06,624 Yes, but it's like you're right here in the room. 435 00:20:06,626 --> 00:20:09,727 And yet, I'm not. 436 00:20:09,729 --> 00:20:13,298 But I feel like I could reach out and touch you. 437 00:20:13,300 --> 00:20:15,466 And yet, you can't. 438 00:20:17,270 --> 00:20:19,137 I know! 439 00:20:21,955 --> 00:20:28,455 == sync, corrected by elderman == @elder_man