1
00:00:02,781 --> 00:00:04,484
Oh, dear.
2
00:00:04,485 --> 00:00:06,485
Penny, have you been
recording shows
3
00:00:06,487 --> 00:00:08,320
on our DVR again?
No.
4
00:00:08,322 --> 00:00:10,990
Answer honestly.
This is not a trial.
5
00:00:12,392 --> 00:00:14,243
That'll come later.
6
00:00:14,245 --> 00:00:16,512
Absolutely not.
7
00:00:16,514 --> 00:00:18,614
Help me out here.
I can't afford another demerit.
8
00:00:18,616 --> 00:00:19,598
Yeah.
9
00:00:19,600 --> 00:00:22,451
Uh... maybe we were hacked.
10
00:00:22,453 --> 00:00:25,487
You know, the Chinese have been
hacking everything lately.
11
00:00:25,489 --> 00:00:30,743
Why would the Chinese make our
DVR record Paul Blart: Mall Cop?
12
00:00:32,796 --> 00:00:34,246
I don't know.
13
00:00:34,248 --> 00:00:37,282
It's a fat guy on a Segway.
That's funny everywhere.
14
00:00:37,284 --> 00:00:39,051
I'm deleting it.
15
00:00:39,053 --> 00:00:40,419
Well, hang on.
16
00:00:40,421 --> 00:00:43,255
Maybe the Chinese haven't
finished watching it yet.
17
00:00:44,691 --> 00:00:46,976
You know, if you're trying
to make space on the DVR,
18
00:00:46,978 --> 00:00:48,310
why don't you just get rid of
19
00:00:48,312 --> 00:00:49,812
some of the stuff
you've already watched?
20
00:00:49,814 --> 00:00:51,463
Like, um... Alphas.
21
00:00:51,465 --> 00:00:53,315
No, that's
the season two finale.
22
00:00:53,317 --> 00:00:54,650
That was quite the cliffhanger.
23
00:00:54,652 --> 00:00:56,802
I'm going to re-watch it
before season three starts.
24
00:00:56,804 --> 00:00:58,971
There is no season three.
They canceled that show.
25
00:01:02,659 --> 00:01:03,993
Well, they can't cancel it.
26
00:01:03,995 --> 00:01:05,778
It ended on a cliffhanger.
27
00:01:06,546 --> 00:01:08,247
- They did.
- Uh, Sheldon,
28
00:01:08,249 --> 00:01:09,815
there are two dumplings left.
Do you want them?
29
00:01:09,817 --> 00:01:11,149
Dumplings?
30
00:01:11,151 --> 00:01:13,152
Don't you understand
what's going on here?
31
00:01:13,154 --> 00:01:15,153
As a rule, no.
32
00:01:15,155 --> 00:01:18,407
That show ended with all
the residents of New York
33
00:01:18,409 --> 00:01:19,875
either dead or unconscious.
34
00:01:19,877 --> 00:01:22,511
Now I'll never know
what happened.
35
00:01:22,513 --> 00:01:24,596
Well, why don't you
make up your own ending?
36
00:01:24,598 --> 00:01:26,999
Oh, sure, what a wonderful idea.
37
00:01:27,001 --> 00:01:28,183
And after that,
38
00:01:28,185 --> 00:01:30,219
I'll make up my own rules
of oral hygiene.
39
00:01:30,221 --> 00:01:32,638
You know, instead of flossing,
I'll rub pudding on my gums.
40
00:01:32,640 --> 00:01:35,024
I'm going to get the number
of the SyFy Channel
41
00:01:35,026 --> 00:01:36,775
and give them what for.
42
00:01:36,777 --> 00:01:38,060
Oh, please, don't do that.
43
00:01:38,062 --> 00:01:40,679
No. They can't just cancel
a show like Alphas.
44
00:01:40,681 --> 00:01:43,065
You know? They have to help
the viewers let go.
45
00:01:43,067 --> 00:01:46,068
Firefly did a movie
to wrap things up.
46
00:01:46,070 --> 00:01:49,071
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
continued on as a comic book.
47
00:01:49,073 --> 00:01:52,458
Heroes gradually lowered
the quality season by season
48
00:01:52,460 --> 00:01:54,293
till we were grateful it ended.
49
00:01:54,295 --> 00:01:57,146
I feel bad for whoever
gets that phone call.
50
00:01:57,148 --> 00:01:58,464
Ah, don't.
51
00:01:58,466 --> 00:02:00,766
If they didn't want to be
yelled at by crazy nerds,
52
00:02:00,768 --> 00:02:02,528
they shouldn't have started
a sci-fi channel.
53
00:02:03,720 --> 00:02:07,389
♪ Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ♪
54
00:02:07,391 --> 00:02:10,726
♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ♪
55
00:02:10,728 --> 00:02:12,344
♪ The Earth began to cool
56
00:02:12,346 --> 00:02:14,897
♪ The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ♪
57
00:02:14,899 --> 00:02:17,566
♪ We built the Wall
♪ We built the pyramids ♪
58
00:02:17,568 --> 00:02:20,219
♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪
59
00:02:20,221 --> 00:02:22,121
♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪
60
00:02:22,123 --> 00:02:24,073
♪ Bang! ♪
61
00:02:24,098 --> 00:02:28,098
♪ The Big Bang Theory 6x21 ♪
The Closure Alternative
Original Air Date on April 25, 2013
62
00:02:28,099 --> 00:02:33,099
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
63
00:02:33,374 --> 00:02:34,766
I think you're gonna
be really happy
64
00:02:34,767 --> 00:02:35,767
with this security camera.
65
00:02:35,769 --> 00:02:37,252
The optics are great,
66
00:02:37,254 --> 00:02:38,637
it's got infrared technology,
67
00:02:38,639 --> 00:02:39,988
and there's even
68
00:02:39,990 --> 00:02:41,640
a backup battery
when the power goes out.
69
00:02:41,642 --> 00:02:42,791
Whatever.
70
00:02:42,793 --> 00:02:44,226
I can see my little princess
71
00:02:44,228 --> 00:02:46,395
while I'm at work, right?
72
00:02:46,397 --> 00:02:50,131
Why can't you just watch porn
like a regular guy?
73
00:02:51,784 --> 00:02:54,820
I need your laptop so I can
configure the software.
74
00:02:54,822 --> 00:02:55,904
Wait, hold on.
75
00:02:55,906 --> 00:02:57,472
This is weird.
76
00:02:57,474 --> 00:02:58,657
What?
77
00:02:58,659 --> 00:02:59,992
I was Googling that girl
I've been dating,
78
00:02:59,994 --> 00:03:01,643
and I found her blog.
79
00:03:01,645 --> 00:03:02,828
Cool.
80
00:03:02,830 --> 00:03:04,079
Anything juicy?
81
00:03:04,081 --> 00:03:05,914
She said she recently
went on a date
82
00:03:05,916 --> 00:03:07,349
with a guy named Roger?
83
00:03:09,168 --> 00:03:11,119
And he's Indian?
84
00:03:12,171 --> 00:03:14,289
And he's an astrophysicist, too?
85
00:03:16,876 --> 00:03:19,042
You know what's going on,
don't you?
86
00:03:19,043 --> 00:03:19,508
Yes.
87
00:03:19,513 --> 00:03:20,762
Mummy was right.
88
00:03:20,764 --> 00:03:23,515
American girls are
sexually voracious devils.
89
00:03:23,517 --> 00:03:25,884
I can't believe
I have to explain this.
90
00:03:25,886 --> 00:03:29,354
People change names on blogs
to protect their privacy.
91
00:03:29,356 --> 00:03:32,006
Roger is Raj.
92
00:03:32,008 --> 00:03:33,558
Oh.
93
00:03:33,560 --> 00:03:35,510
I always thought,
if I had a white name,
94
00:03:35,512 --> 00:03:37,679
it would be Gavin.
95
00:03:39,365 --> 00:03:41,066
Keep reading.
What does it say?
96
00:03:41,068 --> 00:03:42,617
No, no, I don't know
if I should.
97
00:03:42,619 --> 00:03:45,353
If she wanted me to know about
her blog, she would've told me.
98
00:03:45,355 --> 00:03:46,738
It's almost like
I'm reading her diary.
99
00:03:46,740 --> 00:03:49,324
That's exactly what it's like.
Keep reading.
100
00:03:49,326 --> 00:03:51,543
No, this is creepy.
101
00:03:51,545 --> 00:03:54,046
Oh, I think we were looking
at creepy in the rearview mirror
102
00:03:54,048 --> 00:03:56,915
when I put up that camera.
103
00:03:56,917 --> 00:04:00,585
It's not creepy.
Don't listen to him.
104
00:04:00,587 --> 00:04:04,923
Oh, look who's got
the sweetest kisses.
105
00:04:13,015 --> 00:04:14,683
Should I go?
106
00:04:20,323 --> 00:04:22,056
With all the TV Sheldon
was talking about,
107
00:04:22,058 --> 00:04:23,892
I had the greatest idea ever.
108
00:04:23,894 --> 00:04:25,494
It even blows away my idea
109
00:04:25,496 --> 00:04:28,246
for a Star Wars themed coffee
shop called "Brewbacca's."
110
00:04:29,749 --> 00:04:32,233
You need to watch
Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
111
00:04:32,235 --> 00:04:34,419
It is the perfect show
for the two of us.
112
00:04:34,421 --> 00:04:36,121
It's got action and jokes
113
00:04:36,123 --> 00:04:38,707
and hot vampires and romance.
I cannot oversell this!
114
00:04:38,709 --> 00:04:40,241
What do you say?
115
00:04:40,243 --> 00:04:43,244
It's 6:30 in the morning.
116
00:04:45,080 --> 00:04:47,215
I thought you
grew up on a farm.
117
00:04:50,386 --> 00:04:52,888
Hello, SyFy Network?
118
00:04:52,890 --> 00:04:55,974
Yeah, this is your
vice president of programming.
119
00:04:55,976 --> 00:04:59,277
Now, we have made a horrible
mistake regarding Alphas.
120
00:04:59,279 --> 00:05:02,380
Yeah, we need to uncancel it
immediately.
121
00:05:02,382 --> 00:05:04,866
Well, you just put me through
to the people who handle that,
122
00:05:04,868 --> 00:05:06,100
you tell them it's me,
123
00:05:06,102 --> 00:05:07,953
and I don't want to answer
a lot of questions
124
00:05:07,955 --> 00:05:10,271
about if I really am
who I say I am, you know?
125
00:05:11,207 --> 00:05:13,241
I just... I want this done.
126
00:05:13,243 --> 00:05:16,128
No, I am not the person
who just called.
127
00:05:18,214 --> 00:05:21,082
That man was clearly a cowboy.
128
00:05:21,084 --> 00:05:22,384
Yeah, who was plumb concerned
129
00:05:22,386 --> 00:05:23,952
about y'all canceling
his favorite show.
130
00:05:25,471 --> 00:05:28,673
Why do they keep
hanging up on me?
131
00:05:28,675 --> 00:05:30,058
I'm sorry you're upset.
132
00:05:30,060 --> 00:05:33,795
You know, Sheldon, sometimes
people seek the comfort
133
00:05:33,797 --> 00:05:36,264
of physical contact
in moments like this.
134
00:05:40,820 --> 00:05:42,854
I am not flying
back to Texas
135
00:05:42,856 --> 00:05:45,290
just so my mom
can give me a hug.
136
00:05:46,659 --> 00:05:47,993
Okay.
137
00:05:47,995 --> 00:05:50,328
Well, what I think
is going on here
138
00:05:50,330 --> 00:05:53,081
is you have a pathological
need for closure.
139
00:05:53,083 --> 00:05:55,250
Oh, that's nonsense.
140
00:05:55,252 --> 00:05:58,036
I mean, you tell me stories
about your day all the time.
141
00:05:58,038 --> 00:05:59,621
I don't care how they end.
142
00:06:01,257 --> 00:06:03,592
You know, I might be able
to help you with this.
143
00:06:03,594 --> 00:06:06,428
There's a whole field
of behavioral neuroscience
144
00:06:06,430 --> 00:06:09,163
that examines ways to retrain
your neural pathways
145
00:06:09,165 --> 00:06:11,216
so stuff like this
bothers you less.
146
00:06:11,218 --> 00:06:12,551
Yeah, but I just told you,
147
00:06:12,553 --> 00:06:14,186
I don't have a problem
with closure.
148
00:06:14,188 --> 00:06:15,687
You sure about that?
149
00:06:15,689 --> 00:06:16,972
Oh, quite sure.
150
00:06:29,268 --> 00:06:30,452
That proves nothing.
151
00:06:33,823 --> 00:06:35,040
Ready to go to lunch?
152
00:06:35,042 --> 00:06:37,008
Do you think I'm feminine?
153
00:06:38,144 --> 00:06:39,661
Yeah. Let's go.
154
00:06:40,713 --> 00:06:41,880
Thanks a lot.
155
00:06:41,882 --> 00:06:42,931
What's going on?
156
00:06:44,034 --> 00:06:46,034
I broke down,
and I read Lucy's blog.
157
00:06:46,036 --> 00:06:47,201
And in one
of the entries,
158
00:06:47,203 --> 00:06:48,703
she said, when we first met,
159
00:06:48,705 --> 00:06:50,338
I struck her
as a little feminine.
160
00:06:50,340 --> 00:06:52,040
Just a little?
161
00:06:52,042 --> 00:06:53,592
That's great.
162
00:06:53,594 --> 00:06:56,061
I have to talk to her
about this.
163
00:06:56,063 --> 00:06:57,395
Oh, geez, why do you girls
164
00:06:57,397 --> 00:06:59,047
always want to talk
about things?
165
00:07:00,016 --> 00:07:01,233
Listen to me,
166
00:07:01,235 --> 00:07:02,617
if she's writing
about your relationship,
167
00:07:02,619 --> 00:07:04,236
use it to your advantage.
168
00:07:04,238 --> 00:07:05,737
Rig the game.
169
00:07:05,739 --> 00:07:07,489
Well, that doesn't seem fair.
170
00:07:07,491 --> 00:07:09,891
Is it fair that girls
like confident, normal guys
171
00:07:09,893 --> 00:07:12,244
more than nervous weirdos?
172
00:07:12,246 --> 00:07:13,495
No, it's not.
173
00:07:13,497 --> 00:07:14,897
I've always thought
that was unfair.
174
00:07:16,065 --> 00:07:17,933
So take what's
in that blog
175
00:07:17,935 --> 00:07:20,335
and use it to get
her pants off.
176
00:07:20,337 --> 00:07:22,737
Why do you have to make
everything so filthy?
177
00:07:22,739 --> 00:07:24,589
Why couldn't you just say
the blog is like
178
00:07:24,591 --> 00:07:26,374
her giving me
the key to her heart?
179
00:07:26,376 --> 00:07:28,343
"The key to her heart."
180
00:07:28,345 --> 00:07:29,911
That's nice.
181
00:07:29,913 --> 00:07:30,962
Were you quoting someone
182
00:07:30,964 --> 00:07:33,414
or is it tattooed
on the small of your back?
183
00:07:33,416 --> 00:07:35,416
I was quoting a man
184
00:07:35,418 --> 00:07:37,552
who knows a thing or two
about women:
185
00:07:37,554 --> 00:07:39,437
Sir Elton John.
186
00:07:48,097 --> 00:07:49,597
So, did you love it?
187
00:07:49,599 --> 00:07:51,199
Of course you loved it.
How could you not love it?
188
00:07:51,201 --> 00:07:53,652
Tell me how much you loved it.
189
00:07:53,654 --> 00:07:55,103
It was cute.
190
00:07:57,423 --> 00:07:59,440
Oh, don't say cute.
191
00:07:59,442 --> 00:08:00,458
That's the worst.
192
00:08:00,460 --> 00:08:01,609
W's wrong with cute?
193
00:08:01,611 --> 00:08:03,628
It just makes things seem small.
194
00:08:03,630 --> 00:08:05,080
It diminishes them.
195
00:08:05,082 --> 00:08:08,550
So you want me to stop calling
your little tushy cute?
196
00:08:08,552 --> 00:08:11,119
You can try,
but nobody's gonna believe you.
197
00:08:13,973 --> 00:08:16,457
I just... I don't understand how
you can watch a show that great
198
00:08:16,459 --> 00:08:17,976
and not be excited by it.
199
00:08:17,978 --> 00:08:19,644
I liked it. I'm excited.
200
00:08:19,646 --> 00:08:21,813
Well, then, tell your face.
201
00:08:22,665 --> 00:08:24,265
What do you want from me?
202
00:08:24,267 --> 00:08:25,300
You know what?
203
00:08:25,302 --> 00:08:27,018
Never mind.
We gave it a shot.
204
00:08:27,020 --> 00:08:28,470
Let's just see
what else is on.
205
00:08:28,472 --> 00:08:30,569
Oh, come on,
don't be like that.
206
00:08:30,594 --> 00:08:31,240
Well...
207
00:08:31,241 --> 00:08:32,524
I'm sorry I called it cute.
208
00:08:32,526 --> 00:08:34,308
Let's watch another one.
Really?
209
00:08:34,310 --> 00:08:35,327
Yeah, it was fun.
210
00:08:35,329 --> 00:08:37,278
Kind of reminded me
of my high school.
211
00:08:37,280 --> 00:08:39,981
But instead of vampires,
we had meth heads.
212
00:08:41,585 --> 00:08:45,303
But both came out at night
and had messed up teeth.
213
00:08:45,305 --> 00:08:46,755
All right, cool.
214
00:08:46,757 --> 00:08:48,423
I-I think you'll like
the next one better.
215
00:08:48,425 --> 00:08:50,875
All the cheerleaders are
suffering from an evil curse.
216
00:08:50,877 --> 00:08:53,878
Oh. Well, that's like
my high school, too.
217
00:08:53,880 --> 00:08:56,748
But instead of a curse,
it was crabs.
218
00:08:59,001 --> 00:09:01,636
I've come up with
a series of exercises
219
00:09:01,638 --> 00:09:03,855
to help with your
compulsive need for closure.
220
00:09:03,857 --> 00:09:07,175
I take issue with
the word "compulsive."
221
00:09:08,361 --> 00:09:09,844
All I'm saying is,
222
00:09:09,846 --> 00:09:13,014
we live in a world where
closure isn't always an op...
223
00:09:24,610 --> 00:09:26,378
...tion. Okay.
224
00:09:27,880 --> 00:09:31,082
For the sake of argument,
let's say I have a problem.
225
00:09:31,084 --> 00:09:33,334
What would be your plan
for addressing it?
226
00:09:33,336 --> 00:09:35,970
I'm going to recondition
your brain
227
00:09:35,972 --> 00:09:40,208
so that the need for completion
isn't so overwhelming.
228
00:09:42,377 --> 00:09:43,544
By playing tic-tac-toe?
229
00:09:43,546 --> 00:09:45,713
Yep. Your turn.
230
00:09:45,715 --> 00:09:47,816
Oh, Amy.
231
00:09:47,818 --> 00:09:49,901
And you wonder why people
think neuroscience
232
00:09:49,903 --> 00:09:52,187
is nothing but a goofy game
for diaper babies.
233
00:09:53,222 --> 00:09:57,275
Tic-tac-toe can only end
in win, lose or draw...
234
00:09:57,277 --> 00:10:00,495
none of which will
deny me closure.
235
00:10:00,497 --> 00:10:02,230
Especially since
I'm about to win.
236
00:10:13,375 --> 00:10:14,876
B-But we didn't finish.
237
00:10:14,878 --> 00:10:16,628
Exactly.
238
00:10:16,630 --> 00:10:18,246
How does that make you feel?
239
00:10:19,932 --> 00:10:21,800
The same way any
normal person would.
240
00:10:21,802 --> 00:10:24,436
Feel like I want to
peel off my own face
241
00:10:24,438 --> 00:10:26,554
and tear it in two
and then again and again
242
00:10:26,556 --> 00:10:28,606
until I have a handful
of Sheldon-face confetti.
243
00:10:29,859 --> 00:10:31,776
And that's exactly the feeling
we want to address
244
00:10:31,778 --> 00:10:32,894
with this course of treatment.
245
00:10:32,896 --> 00:10:34,863
Yeah, or you could pitch in,
grab a nostril
246
00:10:34,865 --> 00:10:36,948
and help me get this face off.
247
00:10:36,950 --> 00:10:39,100
Come on, you can do this.
248
00:10:39,102 --> 00:10:41,870
You don't know what it's like
to feel completely frustrated.
249
00:10:41,872 --> 00:10:43,204
To have a-a desire
250
00:10:43,206 --> 00:10:45,106
build up within you
and be denied
251
00:10:45,108 --> 00:10:47,709
any opportunity for release.
252
00:10:55,117 --> 00:10:56,801
Yeah, sounds like a drag.
253
00:11:12,491 --> 00:11:14,024
Okay, help me out here.
254
00:11:14,026 --> 00:11:15,875
Why does he love
this show so much?
255
00:11:15,877 --> 00:11:18,295
Well, there was action,
it was funny.
256
00:11:18,297 --> 00:11:19,913
I mean, you do get
257
00:11:19,915 --> 00:11:22,549
that usually the monster
chases the pretty girl,
258
00:11:22,551 --> 00:11:25,402
but this time the pretty girl
chases the monsters?
259
00:11:26,771 --> 00:11:28,571
Yippee, it's backwards.
260
00:11:28,573 --> 00:11:30,423
I get it.
261
00:11:30,425 --> 00:11:33,009
Why does this
bother you so much?
262
00:11:33,011 --> 00:11:34,728
I don't know.
263
00:11:34,730 --> 00:11:37,063
It's just, he's so passionate
about so many different things.
264
00:11:37,065 --> 00:11:38,548
I just don't get that way.
265
00:11:38,550 --> 00:11:39,816
Do you?
266
00:11:39,818 --> 00:11:42,652
Well, sure. I'm pretty
passionate about science.
267
00:11:42,654 --> 00:11:45,271
I remember the first time
I looked through a microscope
268
00:11:45,273 --> 00:11:47,691
and saw millions
of tiny microorganisms.
269
00:11:47,693 --> 00:11:50,026
It was like
a whole other universe.
270
00:11:50,028 --> 00:11:54,664
If I wanted to, I could wipe
it out with my thumb like a god.
271
00:11:55,883 --> 00:11:58,618
See? I wish I had some
of that fire in my life.
272
00:11:58,620 --> 00:12:00,537
I mean, I want
to care about things
273
00:12:00,539 --> 00:12:02,122
and get excited
like you guys.
274
00:12:02,124 --> 00:12:03,506
Well, there's no
reason you can't.
275
00:12:03,508 --> 00:12:04,674
You think?
276
00:12:04,676 --> 00:12:06,660
Absolutely.
All we need to do is spend
277
00:12:06,662 --> 00:12:09,262
a little time and find something
you're passionate about.
278
00:12:09,264 --> 00:12:12,966
That sounds
like a lot of work.
279
00:12:17,388 --> 00:12:18,805
Hey, what's up?
280
00:12:18,807 --> 00:12:20,940
Uh, Lucy's coming over.
I need some advice.
281
00:12:20,942 --> 00:12:25,829
However long you think the
foreplay should be, triple it.
282
00:12:26,964 --> 00:12:29,866
Just tell me which one you think
is more manly.
283
00:12:29,868 --> 00:12:32,986
This hockey jersey or...
284
00:12:32,988 --> 00:12:34,704
this football jersey.
285
00:12:34,706 --> 00:12:38,241
I don't know. Go with hockey.
286
00:12:38,243 --> 00:12:40,627
Good-- black is more slimming.
287
00:12:42,230 --> 00:12:43,463
Oh, that's her.
288
00:12:43,465 --> 00:12:45,999
I got to go be butch.
Toodles.
289
00:12:50,788 --> 00:12:52,389
Hey.
Hi.
290
00:12:52,391 --> 00:12:54,340
Come in.
291
00:12:54,342 --> 00:12:56,843
Oh, look how cute
your little doggy is.
292
00:12:56,845 --> 00:12:58,845
Yeah, well,
I wouldn't get too close.
293
00:12:58,847 --> 00:13:00,597
If I give the right command
in German,
294
00:13:00,599 --> 00:13:02,065
she'll rip your face off.
295
00:13:06,687 --> 00:13:11,074
♪ O'er the land
of the free ♪
296
00:13:11,076 --> 00:13:13,660
♪ And the home
297
00:13:13,662 --> 00:13:16,112
♪ Of the...
298
00:13:16,114 --> 00:13:17,914
Next.
299
00:13:22,203 --> 00:13:24,237
That's quite an impressive
layout, isn't it?
300
00:13:26,490 --> 00:13:28,091
Yes.
301
00:13:30,878 --> 00:13:32,712
Let's box it up.
302
00:13:34,432 --> 00:13:36,382
"Let's box it up."
303
00:13:45,943 --> 00:13:47,360
That's enough.
304
00:13:48,345 --> 00:13:50,480
Sheldon, Sheldon, give it!
305
00:13:53,384 --> 00:13:56,803
Okay, Sheldon, make a wish
and blow out the candles.
306
00:14:02,660 --> 00:14:04,377
Oops, missed one.
307
00:14:04,379 --> 00:14:06,463
Now your wish can't come true.
308
00:14:08,866 --> 00:14:11,718
Lucky for you,
'cause I wished you were dead.
309
00:14:15,923 --> 00:14:17,390
I like your jersey.
310
00:14:17,392 --> 00:14:19,092
Thanks. I love hockey.
311
00:14:19,094 --> 00:14:20,710
Oh, cool. So does my dad.
312
00:14:20,712 --> 00:14:22,679
We watched it
all the time growing up.
313
00:14:22,681 --> 00:14:24,397
Who's your favorite player?
314
00:14:29,069 --> 00:14:32,906
Not Brian Boitano,
that's for sure.
315
00:14:34,508 --> 00:14:35,775
How's your burrito?
316
00:14:35,777 --> 00:14:38,361
It's still a little frozen
in the middle.
317
00:14:38,363 --> 00:14:40,079
Probably because I didn't read
the instructions.
318
00:14:40,081 --> 00:14:43,249
No wrapper's
going to tell me what to do.
319
00:14:43,251 --> 00:14:46,002
Unless his name is Jay-Z.
320
00:14:46,004 --> 00:14:47,754
Is something going on?
321
00:14:47,756 --> 00:14:48,855
What do you mean?
322
00:14:48,857 --> 00:14:50,590
Well, you're acting all weird.
323
00:14:50,592 --> 00:14:52,008
And I'm pretty weird,
324
00:14:52,010 --> 00:14:54,627
so I think I know
what I'm talking about.
325
00:14:54,629 --> 00:14:58,848
I don't know. Maybe it's all
those steroids I've been taking.
326
00:14:58,850 --> 00:15:01,017
I think I'm gonna go.
327
00:15:01,019 --> 00:15:03,469
Thank you for the burrito
and the pork rinds
328
00:15:03,471 --> 00:15:04,921
and the 20-minute lecture
329
00:15:04,923 --> 00:15:08,358
on why monster trucks
are better than regular trucks.
330
00:15:08,360 --> 00:15:10,026
Wait, wait.
331
00:15:11,261 --> 00:15:14,614
I-I found your blog
where you wrote about me.
332
00:15:14,616 --> 00:15:17,867
Oh. I kind of just write that
for myself.
333
00:15:17,869 --> 00:15:19,652
I didn't think anybody
actually read it.
334
00:15:19,654 --> 00:15:21,905
No kidding. You didn't make it
easy to find.
335
00:15:21,907 --> 00:15:23,706
I spent hours
digging around online.
336
00:15:25,042 --> 00:15:26,962
For the record, you have
excellent credit scores.
337
00:15:27,711 --> 00:15:29,212
And your diabetic aunt seems
338
00:15:29,214 --> 00:15:32,048
to be adjusting
to her new leg just fine.
339
00:15:33,116 --> 00:15:35,501
Why were you acting
so strange tonight?
340
00:15:35,503 --> 00:15:37,754
You called me feminine.
341
00:15:37,756 --> 00:15:38,805
And I...
342
00:15:38,807 --> 00:15:41,674
I wanted you to think
I was more manly.
343
00:15:41,676 --> 00:15:44,644
Raj, I didn't say "feminine"
was a bad thing.
344
00:15:44,646 --> 00:15:46,729
I meant that you're sweet
and thoughtful
345
00:15:46,731 --> 00:15:48,765
and your skin looks so much
like caramel,
346
00:15:48,767 --> 00:15:51,300
I just want to dip
an apple in your face.
347
00:15:51,302 --> 00:15:53,903
I do have a pretty
balls-to-the-wall
348
00:15:53,905 --> 00:15:56,656
moisturizing regimen.
349
00:15:56,658 --> 00:15:58,825
So, are you okay?
350
00:15:58,827 --> 00:16:00,360
Yeah.
351
00:16:00,362 --> 00:16:02,144
Good.
352
00:16:02,146 --> 00:16:03,413
Do you even like hockey?
353
00:16:03,415 --> 00:16:04,831
No.
354
00:16:04,833 --> 00:16:06,148
Bought this
at the Staples Center
355
00:16:06,150 --> 00:16:07,867
when I went
to see Taylor Swift.
356
00:16:11,622 --> 00:16:14,624
So, I was thinking
how excited you get
357
00:16:14,626 --> 00:16:17,043
about stuff like Buffy
or science
358
00:16:17,045 --> 00:16:19,879
or which TV remote
you and Sheldon should buy.
359
00:16:19,881 --> 00:16:21,097
The "Harmony One" was fine.
360
00:16:21,099 --> 00:16:22,966
We didn't need to upgrade
to the 1100,
361
00:16:22,968 --> 00:16:26,269
which he knows
is too big for my hand.
362
00:16:26,271 --> 00:16:29,606
See, that's the kind of passion
I didn't think I had.
363
00:16:29,608 --> 00:16:32,191
But then I realized
I'm passionate about you.
364
00:16:32,193 --> 00:16:36,863
Oh... my cute little tushy
strikes again.
365
00:16:37,781 --> 00:16:39,732
No, I'm serious.
366
00:16:39,734 --> 00:16:42,118
Look, I've always had
these plans.
367
00:16:42,120 --> 00:16:44,854
I was gonna be in movies
and live this glamorous life,
368
00:16:44,856 --> 00:16:46,239
and anything less than that
369
00:16:46,241 --> 00:16:47,707
just wasn't worth
getting excited about.
370
00:16:47,709 --> 00:16:49,826
Those things can still happen.
371
00:16:49,828 --> 00:16:50,994
Oh, obviously it's gonna happen.
372
00:16:50,996 --> 00:16:53,362
Yeah, a psychic at a
bachelorette party told me so.
373
00:16:53,364 --> 00:16:56,132
Anyway, what I meant was...
374
00:16:56,134 --> 00:16:58,701
I shouldn't wait, you know?
375
00:16:58,703 --> 00:17:03,723
I've got you, I've got Sheldon,
all these wonderful friends.
376
00:17:03,725 --> 00:17:06,142
My life is exciting right now.
377
00:17:06,144 --> 00:17:08,394
That's a big deal.
378
00:17:08,396 --> 00:17:11,481
It is, isn't it?
379
00:17:12,983 --> 00:17:15,234
So, does that mean
we get to do stuff
380
00:17:15,236 --> 00:17:18,888
like talk about cool shows
or get dressed up
381
00:17:18,890 --> 00:17:21,924
in matching costumes
and go to Comic-Con?
382
00:17:21,926 --> 00:17:26,228
Leonard, I had an epiphany,
not a stroke.
383
00:17:29,166 --> 00:17:31,951
Amy, I must say,
I was skeptical at first,
384
00:17:31,953 --> 00:17:35,588
but this has truly been
a transformative evening.
385
00:17:35,590 --> 00:17:38,407
I'm a little surprised to hear
you feeling so positive.
386
00:17:38,409 --> 00:17:40,960
Well, you're an excellent
neuroscientist,
387
00:17:40,962 --> 00:17:44,797
you're a wonderful
girlfriend, and...
388
00:17:47,368 --> 00:17:48,551
And?
389
00:17:48,553 --> 00:17:51,420
Doesn't matter, does it?
390
00:17:51,422 --> 00:17:53,890
I'm proud of you, Sheldon.
391
00:17:57,260 --> 00:17:59,595
And a complete sucker.
392
00:18:04,151 --> 00:18:06,102
Oh, yeah.
393
00:18:13,560 --> 00:18:15,428
There he is.
394
00:18:18,665 --> 00:18:22,969
♪ And the home of the brave...
395
00:18:28,208 --> 00:18:30,710
Don't stop. Yes, keep going.
396
00:18:30,712 --> 00:18:33,346
Just like that.
Almost there, almost there.
397
00:18:38,318 --> 00:18:39,719
Sheldon, you big weirdo,
398
00:18:39,721 --> 00:18:42,755
I want you to know that I love
that you're in my life.
399
00:18:42,757 --> 00:18:45,591
I love you, too.
400
00:18:56,673 --> 00:18:59,455
Hello. Uh, is this
the Bruce Miller who wrote
401
00:18:59,456 --> 00:19:02,522
the season finale of Alphas?
402
00:19:02,524 --> 00:19:05,358
Oh, smashing.
Yeah, you already sound nicer
403
00:19:05,360 --> 00:19:07,394
than the last Bruce Miller
who suggested
404
00:19:07,396 --> 00:19:10,280
I have sexual relations
with myself.
405
00:19:10,282 --> 00:19:11,764
Yeah, now, down to business.
406
00:19:11,766 --> 00:19:13,483
Um, your show ended
on a cliffhanger.
407
00:19:13,485 --> 00:19:17,421
Could you please tell me
how you planned to resolve it?
408
00:19:17,423 --> 00:19:19,539
Uh-huh.
409
00:19:19,541 --> 00:19:21,108
Mm-hmm.
410
00:19:21,110 --> 00:19:22,459
I see.
411
00:19:23,334 --> 00:19:24,616
Well, that all stinks.
412
00:19:24,618 --> 00:19:26,251
No wonder you got canceled.
Bye.
413
00:19:26,253 --> 00:19:31,253
== sync, corrected by elderman ==