1 00:00:04,491 --> 00:00:07,260 I must say, Penny, this is great fun. 2 00:00:07,261 --> 00:00:08,795 Glad you're enjoying yourself. 3 00:00:08,796 --> 00:00:11,464 Until I met you and Bernadette, my trips to the bathroom 4 00:00:11,465 --> 00:00:14,267 had been entirely focused on elimination. 5 00:00:14,268 --> 00:00:17,704 Now they have a delightful social aspect. 6 00:00:17,705 --> 00:00:19,439 Amy, you must've been in the bathroom 7 00:00:19,440 --> 00:00:20,807 with other women before. 8 00:00:20,808 --> 00:00:24,310 Of course I have. 9 00:00:24,311 --> 00:00:26,496 But they were strangers and seemed off-put 10 00:00:26,497 --> 00:00:29,816 when I engaged in friendly stall-to-stall chit-chat. 11 00:00:29,817 --> 00:00:31,984 Some women don't like to get chummy 12 00:00:31,985 --> 00:00:34,120 when their panties are down. 13 00:00:34,121 --> 00:00:37,257 You okay in there, bestie? 14 00:00:37,258 --> 00:00:38,491 I'm fine... 15 00:00:38,492 --> 00:00:40,026 The reason I ask is that many people 16 00:00:40,027 --> 00:00:41,561 experience bladder shyness; 17 00:00:41,562 --> 00:00:43,329 the inability to pass uri... 18 00:00:43,330 --> 00:00:45,498 Yeah, I said I'm fine. Stop talking to me. 19 00:00:45,499 --> 00:00:47,901 She always this crabby when she urinates? 20 00:00:47,902 --> 00:00:50,103 We're really not that close. 21 00:00:50,104 --> 00:00:53,106 Screw it. I'll go later. 22 00:00:53,107 --> 00:00:55,541 And I'll be right by your side. 23 00:00:57,895 --> 00:00:59,412 Did I tell you Priya invited 24 00:00:59,413 --> 00:01:01,581 me and Howard to have dinner with her and Leonard? 25 00:01:01,582 --> 00:01:03,182 Oh, that's nice. 26 00:01:03,183 --> 00:01:05,051 No, it's not. 27 00:01:05,052 --> 00:01:06,552 It's a strategic maneuver. 28 00:01:06,553 --> 00:01:09,188 Leonard's new girlfriend is testing Bernadette's loyalty 29 00:01:09,189 --> 00:01:10,390 to you and the group. 30 00:01:10,391 --> 00:01:12,358 That bitch is crafty. 31 00:01:14,795 --> 00:01:17,029 - You think? - Of course. 32 00:01:17,030 --> 00:01:19,332 How does the cheetah attack a herd of wildebeests? 33 00:01:19,333 --> 00:01:21,501 By going after its weakest member. 34 00:01:22,503 --> 00:01:25,772 Well, what makes me the weakest member? 35 00:01:25,773 --> 00:01:29,976 Your trusting nature coupled with your teeny-tiny body. 36 00:01:29,977 --> 00:01:32,578 You wouldn't last a minute on the Serengeti. 37 00:01:32,579 --> 00:01:35,064 Okay, Amy, you're being silly. 38 00:01:35,065 --> 00:01:37,183 I'm not concerned about who hangs out with who. 39 00:01:37,184 --> 00:01:38,685 And I certainly don't have a problem 40 00:01:38,686 --> 00:01:41,187 with Leonard's new girlfriend who wears way too much makeup. 41 00:01:42,323 --> 00:01:45,024 Ooh, these are cute. 42 00:01:45,025 --> 00:01:46,259 Of course if I buy them, 43 00:01:46,260 --> 00:01:49,362 I'll have to rent my womb out to a gay couple. 44 00:01:51,598 --> 00:01:53,750 It doesn't matter. I'm going to tell her we can't make it. 45 00:01:53,751 --> 00:01:55,568 Oh, no. You have to go. 46 00:01:55,569 --> 00:01:56,753 I don't understand. 47 00:01:56,754 --> 00:01:59,672 I thought I was a teeny-tiny wildebeest. 48 00:01:59,673 --> 00:02:03,142 You are-- with hair that smells like strawberries. 49 00:02:03,143 --> 00:02:05,178 And we're going to use that to our advantage. 50 00:02:05,179 --> 00:02:06,546 Wait. What are you talking about? 51 00:02:06,547 --> 00:02:08,931 By accepting the invitation, Bernadette becomes 52 00:02:08,932 --> 00:02:10,984 a double agent inside the enemy camp. 53 00:02:10,985 --> 00:02:12,802 She could ferret out Priya's tactics, 54 00:02:12,803 --> 00:02:14,053 identify her weaknesses 55 00:02:14,054 --> 00:02:16,105 and feed her false information, such as: 56 00:02:16,106 --> 00:02:20,259 Leonard's no stranger to back-alley cockfights. 57 00:02:20,260 --> 00:02:22,261 I don't know. I'm not a very good liar. 58 00:02:22,262 --> 00:02:25,598 They kind of whup that out of you in Catholic school. 59 00:02:25,599 --> 00:02:27,617 Don't worry. I'll teach you. 60 00:02:27,618 --> 00:02:28,985 I did two years of Cub Scouts 61 00:02:28,986 --> 00:02:30,970 before they found out I was a girl. 62 00:02:33,173 --> 00:02:35,074 Okay, I don't know you people. 63 00:02:35,075 --> 00:02:36,642 I'm just an innocent woman wondering 64 00:02:36,643 --> 00:02:39,579 if this shoe store will take my Texaco card. 65 00:02:41,048 --> 00:02:43,533 How do you feel about concealing a recording device 66 00:02:43,534 --> 00:02:46,319 in the cleavage of your ample bosom? 67 00:02:46,320 --> 00:02:49,856 I don't want anything in my ample bosom. 68 00:02:49,857 --> 00:02:53,459 Come on, Strawberries. Take one for the team. 69 00:02:53,460 --> 00:02:57,096 ? Our whole universe was in a hot, dense state ? 70 00:02:57,097 --> 00:03:00,433 ? Then nearly 14 billion years ago expansion started... Wait! ? 71 00:03:00,434 --> 00:03:02,068 ? The Earth began to cool ? 72 00:03:02,069 --> 00:03:04,604 ? The autotrophs began to drool, Neanderthals developed tools ? 73 00:03:04,605 --> 00:03:07,273 ? We built the Wall ? ? We built the pyramids ? 74 00:03:07,274 --> 00:03:09,942 ? Math, Science, History, unraveling the mystery ? 75 00:03:09,943 --> 00:03:11,878 ? That all started with a big bang ? 76 00:03:11,879 --> 00:03:13,030 ? Bang! ? 77 00:03:13,055 --> 00:03:17,055 ? The Big Bang Theory 4x22 ? The Wildebeest Implementation Original Air Date on May 5, 2011 78 00:03:17,080 --> 00:03:21,080 == sync, corrected by elderman == 79 00:03:22,092 --> 00:03:24,694 - Okay, see you later. - Good news. 80 00:03:24,695 --> 00:03:28,014 I finally have a handle on my idea for three-person chess. 81 00:03:29,349 --> 00:03:32,201 That is good news. Bye. 82 00:03:32,202 --> 00:03:33,369 Uh, do you know how I solved 83 00:03:33,370 --> 00:03:36,138 the balanced center combat-area problem? 84 00:03:36,139 --> 00:03:37,490 Five words: 85 00:03:37,491 --> 00:03:41,744 transitional quadrilateral to triangular tessellation. 86 00:03:42,612 --> 00:03:44,880 That... that's brilliant. 87 00:03:44,881 --> 00:03:46,916 It's what I do. 88 00:03:47,584 --> 00:03:49,168 But wait, there's more. 89 00:03:49,169 --> 00:03:52,121 I also invented two new chess pieces. 90 00:03:52,122 --> 00:03:55,324 The serpent... and the old woman. 91 00:03:57,494 --> 00:03:59,929 Okay, now I have to ask. What do they do? 92 00:03:59,930 --> 00:04:02,965 When the serpent slithers to an opposing player's piece, 93 00:04:02,966 --> 00:04:05,034 that piece is considered poisoned 94 00:04:05,035 --> 00:04:08,304 and will die after two more moves. 95 00:04:10,440 --> 00:04:12,041 All right. 96 00:04:12,042 --> 00:04:15,845 Unless... it gets to the old woman in time, 97 00:04:15,846 --> 00:04:18,514 in which case she sucks out the poison, 98 00:04:18,515 --> 00:04:21,784 turning her into the Grand Empress: 99 00:04:24,888 --> 00:04:26,388 a piece combining the power 100 00:04:26,389 --> 00:04:30,025 of the knight, queen and serpent. 101 00:04:30,026 --> 00:04:31,427 Elegant. 102 00:04:31,428 --> 00:04:33,996 That's because it's simple. 103 00:04:35,899 --> 00:04:37,900 Okay, well, I look forward to playing with you. 104 00:04:37,901 --> 00:04:39,135 And... 105 00:04:39,136 --> 00:04:40,169 And what? 106 00:04:40,170 --> 00:04:42,671 And a third person. 107 00:04:42,672 --> 00:04:45,191 It's three-person chess. 108 00:04:45,192 --> 00:04:47,176 I must say, ever since you started 109 00:04:47,177 --> 00:04:51,480 having regular intercourse, your mind has lost its keen edge. 110 00:04:52,365 --> 00:04:54,517 You should reflect on that. 111 00:04:54,518 --> 00:04:57,453 Excuse me, but Einstein had a pretty busy sex life. 112 00:04:57,454 --> 00:05:01,857 Yes, and he never unified gravity with the other forces. 113 00:05:01,858 --> 00:05:03,959 If he hadn't been such a hound dog, 114 00:05:03,960 --> 00:05:05,828 we'd all have time machines. 115 00:05:05,829 --> 00:05:08,297 Got it. Bye. 116 00:05:08,298 --> 00:05:10,166 You know I'm right. 117 00:05:11,935 --> 00:05:15,204 I think he's getting worse. 118 00:05:15,205 --> 00:05:18,073 Oh, my metatarsal are barking. 119 00:05:24,648 --> 00:05:26,215 - You okay? - Yeah, yeah. 120 00:05:26,216 --> 00:05:28,350 I'm just breaking in some new shoes. 121 00:05:28,351 --> 00:05:30,219 - Very pretty. - Thank you. 122 00:05:30,220 --> 00:05:31,403 Did you know that women wear high heels 123 00:05:31,404 --> 00:05:33,989 to make the buttocks and breasts more prominent? 124 00:05:33,990 --> 00:05:35,825 Hadn't really thought about it. 125 00:05:35,826 --> 00:05:37,226 Look. 126 00:05:40,397 --> 00:05:44,500 Uh, sure. Very... prominent. 127 00:05:44,501 --> 00:05:47,269 Please, Leonard, don't leer, you have a girlfriend. 128 00:05:48,071 --> 00:05:50,272 - Sorry. - So, are you off to dinner 129 00:05:50,273 --> 00:05:51,674 with Priya, Howard and Bernadette? 130 00:05:51,675 --> 00:05:52,675 Yeah. How did you know? 131 00:05:52,676 --> 00:05:53,709 I heard it at the mall, 132 00:05:53,710 --> 00:05:55,177 when I was shopping with my girlfriends, 133 00:05:55,178 --> 00:05:57,813 'cause, you know, that's kind of my life now. 134 00:05:58,982 --> 00:06:00,049 Have a good night. 135 00:06:00,050 --> 00:06:02,218 Try not to ogle my caboose as I walk away. 136 00:06:10,694 --> 00:06:12,962 - Hey, you. - Hi. 137 00:06:13,897 --> 00:06:16,498 Hey, Raj, will you be joining us for dinner? 138 00:06:16,499 --> 00:06:18,934 The lonely guy and the two happy couples? 139 00:06:18,935 --> 00:06:20,736 I'd rather get a prostate exam 140 00:06:20,737 --> 00:06:24,373 from a leper who walks away with nine fingers. 141 00:06:24,374 --> 00:06:28,110 Oh, would you please stop feeling sorry for yourself? 142 00:06:28,111 --> 00:06:31,463 I have to feel sorry for myself. I'm the only one who cares. 143 00:06:31,464 --> 00:06:34,250 Just like I'm the only one who'll have sex with me. 144 00:06:34,251 --> 00:06:37,169 Really? In front of your sister? 145 00:06:37,170 --> 00:06:41,156 We shared a room growing up. This is not news to me. 146 00:06:41,157 --> 00:06:43,976 Excuse me. I'm going to go wander the streets alone. 147 00:06:43,977 --> 00:06:46,095 Invisible, unwanted and unloved; 148 00:06:46,096 --> 00:06:49,331 a pathetic shadow in a city with no heart. 149 00:06:52,168 --> 00:06:54,970 I forgot my windbreaker. It's chilly. 150 00:06:57,841 --> 00:07:01,777 I don't understand. Is this a way to break in new shoes? 151 00:07:01,778 --> 00:07:04,213 No. Once these puppies touch the ground 152 00:07:04,214 --> 00:07:05,447 they're mine, and I'll have to wear them 153 00:07:05,448 --> 00:07:07,016 walking up and down Hollywood Boulevard 154 00:07:07,017 --> 00:07:09,118 in order to pay them off. 155 00:07:11,154 --> 00:07:14,189 Pretty, pretty, pretty. 156 00:07:14,190 --> 00:07:17,659 Good news: the wildebeest is in the curry. 157 00:07:17,660 --> 00:07:19,128 The what? 158 00:07:19,129 --> 00:07:21,997 Bernadette is with Priya and Leonard. 159 00:07:21,998 --> 00:07:24,466 Message received. 160 00:07:24,467 --> 00:07:28,671 Commence operation "Priya Wouldn't Wanna Be-ya." 161 00:07:30,390 --> 00:07:32,024 Hey. Seriously? 162 00:07:32,025 --> 00:07:34,710 Didn't you get enough of this cliquey crap in high school? 163 00:07:34,711 --> 00:07:36,745 I wish. A clique requires friends. 164 00:07:36,746 --> 00:07:39,281 - I didn't have any. - None? 165 00:07:39,282 --> 00:07:41,583 I used to take my lunch down to the maintenance room 166 00:07:41,584 --> 00:07:43,786 and eat with the janitor. 167 00:07:43,787 --> 00:07:46,255 It was nice until his wife called me a puta 168 00:07:46,256 --> 00:07:47,690 and made me stop. 169 00:07:50,493 --> 00:07:53,429 Hang on. 170 00:07:53,430 --> 00:07:55,831 It's the wildebeest. 171 00:07:55,832 --> 00:07:58,500 Priya just made a snide comment about your acting career. 172 00:07:58,501 --> 00:08:00,369 W-What the hell did she say? 173 00:08:00,370 --> 00:08:02,438 She thinks it's cool you're following your dream, 174 00:08:02,439 --> 00:08:04,340 no matter what. 175 00:08:04,341 --> 00:08:07,776 That bitch! 176 00:08:07,777 --> 00:08:10,512 How do you want to handle it? 177 00:08:10,513 --> 00:08:12,348 Um, okay. 178 00:08:12,349 --> 00:08:15,317 Tell Bernadette to tell Priya that I'm on my way to Prague 179 00:08:15,318 --> 00:08:17,853 to shoot a movie with Angelina Jolie. 180 00:08:17,854 --> 00:08:19,555 Got it. 181 00:08:19,556 --> 00:08:22,391 Is it going to be in 3-D? 182 00:08:22,392 --> 00:08:24,226 What? I don't know. It doesn't matter. 183 00:08:24,227 --> 00:08:25,627 I'm gonna say 3-D. 184 00:08:25,628 --> 00:08:28,430 That'll let her know the studio has faith in it. 185 00:08:30,767 --> 00:08:32,868 You're kidding. 3-D? 186 00:08:34,070 --> 00:08:36,705 That's what I hear. 187 00:08:36,706 --> 00:08:39,141 Then the studio must have real faith in it. 188 00:08:41,077 --> 00:08:43,245 Wonder why she didn't tell me. 189 00:08:43,246 --> 00:08:45,714 Have you been spending time with your ex-girlfriend? 190 00:08:45,715 --> 00:08:47,716 No... 191 00:08:47,717 --> 00:08:50,285 Then why are you surprised she didn't tell you? 192 00:08:50,286 --> 00:08:53,856 Well, it's not as much "surprised" as 193 00:08:53,857 --> 00:08:57,726 you know... uh... the other thing. 194 00:08:58,661 --> 00:09:00,829 What other thing? 195 00:09:00,830 --> 00:09:04,833 Well, if you... uh... 196 00:09:04,834 --> 00:09:07,803 I don't... oh... 197 00:09:07,804 --> 00:09:09,371 What's the word I'm looking for? 198 00:09:09,372 --> 00:09:12,107 I'm not going to help you. This is hilarious. 199 00:09:14,411 --> 00:09:17,579 She's also dating an astronaut. 200 00:09:18,515 --> 00:09:21,083 Wow. That's very impressive. 201 00:09:21,084 --> 00:09:24,753 Yeah. But Leonard's impressive, too. 202 00:09:28,425 --> 00:09:30,092 Thank you. 203 00:09:30,994 --> 00:09:33,262 "Befuddled." 204 00:09:33,263 --> 00:09:36,832 The word I was looking for was "befuddled." 205 00:09:41,938 --> 00:09:46,208 Knight to old woman... 206 00:09:47,710 --> 00:09:51,213 six-and-a-third. 207 00:09:57,053 --> 00:10:00,322 Brilliant move. 208 00:10:04,260 --> 00:10:07,062 Thank you. 209 00:10:10,133 --> 00:10:12,901 Will the two of you excuse me? 210 00:10:17,774 --> 00:10:20,642 I need a hug. 211 00:10:21,511 --> 00:10:23,028 Sorry, I have company. 212 00:10:29,547 --> 00:10:32,182 Come on, Sheldon, open the door. 213 00:10:32,183 --> 00:10:35,485 I don't want to hug you. 214 00:10:35,486 --> 00:10:36,853 I don't want to hug you, either. 215 00:10:36,854 --> 00:10:38,221 I was just feeling blue. 216 00:10:38,222 --> 00:10:41,058 Blue, as in depressed. 217 00:10:41,059 --> 00:10:43,193 Well, not so much depressed as lonely. 218 00:10:43,194 --> 00:10:46,163 I don't know what color lonely is. 219 00:10:46,164 --> 00:10:48,198 - What? - Red is angry; 220 00:10:48,199 --> 00:10:49,800 yellow is frightened; 221 00:10:49,801 --> 00:10:53,036 green is jealous; and blue is depressed. 222 00:10:53,037 --> 00:10:56,206 Perhaps we can assign a color to lonely. 223 00:10:56,207 --> 00:11:00,210 Nothing rhymes with orange. It's probably lonely. 224 00:11:01,078 --> 00:11:03,213 All right. Come in. 225 00:11:03,214 --> 00:11:05,882 You look positively orange with loneliness. 226 00:11:07,352 --> 00:11:10,654 No, I don't see that catching on at all. 227 00:11:10,655 --> 00:11:11,855 What are you doing? 228 00:11:11,856 --> 00:11:13,757 I'm working on my three-person chess game. 229 00:11:13,758 --> 00:11:15,392 Oh, cool. Can I play? 230 00:11:17,528 --> 00:11:20,597 It's three-person chess. 231 00:11:20,598 --> 00:11:22,299 Did you bring a friend? 232 00:11:22,300 --> 00:11:23,900 No. 233 00:11:23,901 --> 00:11:26,403 Then as a mental exercise I invite you 234 00:11:26,404 --> 00:11:31,274 to figure out why the two of us can't play three-person chess. 235 00:11:32,243 --> 00:11:35,679 Can you believe this guy? 236 00:11:37,982 --> 00:11:39,416 Social protocol does, however, 237 00:11:39,417 --> 00:11:41,084 require me to bring you a hot beverage 238 00:11:41,085 --> 00:11:42,352 in your time of need. 239 00:11:42,353 --> 00:11:43,587 No, thank you. I'm fine. 240 00:11:43,588 --> 00:11:45,255 It's not optional. 241 00:11:46,290 --> 00:11:49,959 We're out of tea. I hope you like bouillon. 242 00:11:49,960 --> 00:11:53,930 I, uh, I guess you're probably wondering what's got me down. 243 00:11:53,931 --> 00:11:55,649 Actually, I was wondering 244 00:11:55,650 --> 00:11:57,768 if I could add a third new chess piece. 245 00:11:57,769 --> 00:12:01,321 How do you think people would feel about Prince Joey-- 246 00:12:01,322 --> 00:12:04,975 the king's feeble-minded but well-meaning cousin? 247 00:12:04,976 --> 00:12:06,676 I'm going to be 30 years old, 248 00:12:06,677 --> 00:12:08,779 and I have no one in my life to love me. 249 00:12:08,780 --> 00:12:11,448 I'm such a basket case, I can't even talk to a woman 250 00:12:11,449 --> 00:12:13,483 without having alcohol in my body. 251 00:12:13,484 --> 00:12:16,286 The fun thing about Prince Joey 252 00:12:16,287 --> 00:12:20,123 is every time he moves, there's a one-in-five chance 253 00:12:20,124 --> 00:12:21,758 he'll kill himself. 254 00:12:23,194 --> 00:12:25,195 Sheldon, listen to me. 255 00:12:25,196 --> 00:12:27,798 I have a big decision to make, and I'm scared. 256 00:12:27,799 --> 00:12:30,767 Yellow. Go ahead. 257 00:12:30,768 --> 00:12:32,219 A friend at the School of Pharmacology 258 00:12:32,220 --> 00:12:33,937 gave me these new pills they're testing. 259 00:12:33,938 --> 00:12:35,305 He says it's the next big thing 260 00:12:35,306 --> 00:12:36,706 for social anxiety disorder. 261 00:12:36,707 --> 00:12:39,076 Fascinating. What's in it? 262 00:12:39,077 --> 00:12:40,510 I'm not sure. 263 00:12:40,511 --> 00:12:42,813 Some sort of beta-blocker attached to a molecule 264 00:12:42,814 --> 00:12:45,816 extracted from the urine of cows. 265 00:12:45,817 --> 00:12:47,951 I like cows. 266 00:12:47,952 --> 00:12:49,152 That's not the point. 267 00:12:49,153 --> 00:12:51,822 It was its own point. Go on. 268 00:12:51,823 --> 00:12:53,457 I'm a scientist. 269 00:12:53,458 --> 00:12:55,792 My ability to think is my bread and butter. 270 00:12:55,793 --> 00:12:57,627 I'm afraid if I take this, I might lose 271 00:12:57,628 --> 00:13:01,531 that special, unique something that makes me so successful in my field. 272 00:13:01,532 --> 00:13:05,034 Rajesh, I've had the privilege 273 00:13:05,035 --> 00:13:08,038 of working alongside you for many years. 274 00:13:08,039 --> 00:13:12,242 My recommendation is that you gobble these up like Tic Tacs. 275 00:13:17,982 --> 00:13:21,084 Okay, I'm still trying to work this out. 276 00:13:21,085 --> 00:13:24,054 How did Penny meet an astronaut? 277 00:13:24,055 --> 00:13:25,021 I don't know. 278 00:13:25,022 --> 00:13:28,375 The regular way people meet astronauts. 279 00:13:28,376 --> 00:13:31,128 Most of those guys live in Texas. 280 00:13:31,129 --> 00:13:33,930 Obviously, this one doesn't. 281 00:13:35,066 --> 00:13:36,266 Okay. 282 00:13:36,267 --> 00:13:38,168 Leonard lives here. Priya's from India. 283 00:13:38,169 --> 00:13:40,604 People meet, Howard. God! 284 00:13:40,605 --> 00:13:43,073 Fine. 285 00:13:43,074 --> 00:13:44,374 You've met lots of astronauts, 286 00:13:44,375 --> 00:13:46,576 and I've never grilled you about that. 287 00:13:46,577 --> 00:13:49,112 I'd thank you to extend me the same courtesy. 288 00:13:51,015 --> 00:13:53,850 I'm not grilling you; I was just curious. 289 00:13:53,851 --> 00:13:57,454 I still can't get over the fact that she got a big movie part. 290 00:13:57,455 --> 00:14:02,325 Not that I care what my ex-girlfriend's up to, 'cause I don't. 291 00:14:02,326 --> 00:14:05,762 Maybe that's where she met the astronaut, all right? 292 00:14:05,763 --> 00:14:07,731 I'm sorry. What would an astronaut be doing 293 00:14:07,732 --> 00:14:09,399 working on a movie? 294 00:14:09,400 --> 00:14:12,302 He's a consultant. 295 00:14:12,303 --> 00:14:16,122 I thought the movie was about 18th-century Vienna. 296 00:14:16,123 --> 00:14:17,958 He can't have a hobby?! 297 00:14:20,244 --> 00:14:23,129 Excuse me, I have to pee. 298 00:14:23,130 --> 00:14:25,582 Or is that implausible, as well?! 299 00:14:28,986 --> 00:14:32,189 It's nice to have another couple to hang with, isn't it? 300 00:14:34,308 --> 00:14:36,426 All right, guys, you have to go back. 301 00:14:36,427 --> 00:14:37,744 I can't afford you. 302 00:14:37,745 --> 00:14:41,131 No, don't send us away; we love you. 303 00:14:43,034 --> 00:14:46,803 I love you, too, but you cost more than my rent. 304 00:14:46,804 --> 00:14:49,806 But, Penny, you look so good in us. 305 00:14:49,807 --> 00:14:52,192 Damn it, the shoes are right. 306 00:14:52,193 --> 00:14:56,613 Good golly, Penny, your whimsy is boundless. 307 00:14:59,917 --> 00:15:02,652 What do you got for me, wildebeest? 308 00:15:02,653 --> 00:15:04,688 I think they're on to me. 309 00:15:04,689 --> 00:15:06,957 The story's starting to fall apart. 310 00:15:06,958 --> 00:15:08,959 Calm down. Everything's going to be okay. 311 00:15:08,960 --> 00:15:10,227 We may have to kill her. 312 00:15:10,228 --> 00:15:13,463 Bernadette, I'm putting you on speakerphone. 313 00:15:13,464 --> 00:15:15,398 Where are you now? 314 00:15:15,399 --> 00:15:16,766 In the bathroom. 315 00:15:16,767 --> 00:15:20,503 Oh, look at this, another one of our classic bathroom gabfests. 316 00:15:20,504 --> 00:15:22,772 What's the problem? 317 00:15:22,773 --> 00:15:24,241 They're just asking me 318 00:15:24,242 --> 00:15:26,076 all sorts of questions I can't answer. 319 00:15:26,077 --> 00:15:28,078 Just change the subject. 320 00:15:28,079 --> 00:15:30,080 I suppose I could get them back to talking about Leonard 321 00:15:30,081 --> 00:15:31,815 going to India to meet Priya's parents. 322 00:15:31,816 --> 00:15:33,266 What?! 323 00:15:33,267 --> 00:15:35,869 They said something about going there this summer. 324 00:15:35,870 --> 00:15:37,954 What, are they getting engaged? 325 00:15:37,955 --> 00:15:40,890 I don't know. I was too busy covering my heinie 326 00:15:40,891 --> 00:15:43,393 on Amy's stupid astronaut story! 327 00:15:43,394 --> 00:15:45,729 What astronaut story? 328 00:15:45,730 --> 00:15:48,298 You texted me Penny's dating an astronaut. 329 00:15:48,299 --> 00:15:50,267 I texted "architect." That's amusing. 330 00:15:50,268 --> 00:15:53,136 Auto-correct must've changed it. 331 00:15:53,137 --> 00:15:56,873 Yeah, it's hysterical. 332 00:15:56,874 --> 00:15:59,476 All right, look, just forget about the astronaut. 333 00:15:59,477 --> 00:16:02,512 Architect. Where would you have met an astronaut? 334 00:16:04,048 --> 00:16:06,549 Look, just find out what's up with this trip to India. 335 00:16:06,550 --> 00:16:08,418 I don't want to do this anymore! 336 00:16:08,419 --> 00:16:09,452 Don't you quit on us! 337 00:16:10,655 --> 00:16:11,955 Bernie, you okay? 338 00:16:11,956 --> 00:16:14,724 It was an architect! 339 00:16:16,827 --> 00:16:18,945 Thank you for coming with me, Sheldon. 340 00:16:18,946 --> 00:16:19,996 You're a good friend. 341 00:16:19,997 --> 00:16:21,564 I'm glad you think so. 342 00:16:21,565 --> 00:16:23,667 That's what I strive to emulate. 343 00:16:23,668 --> 00:16:27,954 Okay, let's see if this drug works. 344 00:16:36,180 --> 00:16:37,781 Can I help you? 345 00:16:43,587 --> 00:16:47,307 Forgive me for staring, but you're very beautiful. 346 00:16:53,664 --> 00:16:55,598 Thank you. 347 00:16:55,599 --> 00:16:57,434 That's a great accent. Where are you from? 348 00:16:57,435 --> 00:16:58,601 India. 349 00:16:58,602 --> 00:17:00,303 Oh, cool. I've always wanted to go there. 350 00:17:00,304 --> 00:17:01,771 It's a beautiful country. You'd love it. 351 00:17:01,772 --> 00:17:03,073 May I join you? 352 00:17:03,074 --> 00:17:06,576 Uh, okay, sure. Why not? 353 00:17:06,577 --> 00:17:08,411 My name is Dr. Rajesh Koothrappali, 354 00:17:08,412 --> 00:17:09,908 and this is my friend Dr. Sheldon Cooper. 355 00:17:09,933 --> 00:17:10,747 Hi. 356 00:17:10,748 --> 00:17:12,682 There's no need to interact with me. 357 00:17:12,683 --> 00:17:15,552 I'm just here to observe. 358 00:17:15,553 --> 00:17:17,420 What's he observing? 359 00:17:17,421 --> 00:17:19,356 We're scientists. We observe everything. 360 00:17:19,357 --> 00:17:20,590 Here, go buy yourself a scone. 361 00:17:20,591 --> 00:17:23,292 All right. 362 00:17:24,729 --> 00:17:26,930 - And what is your name? - Angela. 363 00:17:26,931 --> 00:17:30,100 Oh, derived from the word "angel." Appropriate. 364 00:17:30,101 --> 00:17:32,402 You're cute. 365 00:17:32,403 --> 00:17:34,337 I'd like to buy a scone. 366 00:17:34,338 --> 00:17:35,672 Oh, I'm sorry, we're out. 367 00:17:35,673 --> 00:17:36,773 We have muffins. 368 00:17:36,774 --> 00:17:38,375 They sound delicious, 369 00:17:38,376 --> 00:17:41,177 but this money is earmarked for scones. 370 00:17:41,178 --> 00:17:43,163 What are you doing?! 371 00:17:43,164 --> 00:17:44,948 Oh, just getting comfortable. 372 00:17:44,949 --> 00:17:49,119 So how long have you lived in Los Angeles? 373 00:17:49,120 --> 00:17:50,170 I... 374 00:17:50,171 --> 00:17:51,421 They were out of scones. 375 00:17:51,422 --> 00:17:52,672 Sheldon, I'm talking to someone. 376 00:17:52,673 --> 00:17:53,690 You're being rude. 377 00:17:53,691 --> 00:17:55,725 I'll bet you're an actress. 378 00:17:55,726 --> 00:17:57,127 If not, you should be. 379 00:17:57,128 --> 00:17:59,129 You have a very expressive face. 380 00:17:59,130 --> 00:18:00,563 Oh, my God. 381 00:18:00,564 --> 00:18:02,716 Wait, where are you going? 382 00:18:02,717 --> 00:18:04,184 We were doing so well. 383 00:18:04,185 --> 00:18:07,637 She never even got to see my penis. 384 00:18:08,939 --> 00:18:11,307 Ta-da! 385 00:18:18,382 --> 00:18:20,683 Who wants some more coffee? 386 00:18:20,684 --> 00:18:22,185 Thanks, yeah. Sure. 387 00:18:22,186 --> 00:18:23,987 Let me help you. 388 00:18:25,539 --> 00:18:28,591 Nice to see that the gals are getting along. 389 00:18:28,592 --> 00:18:30,660 "Gals"? 390 00:18:30,661 --> 00:18:32,996 Who are you, Fred Flintstone? 391 00:18:34,365 --> 00:18:36,166 This trip to India sounds fun. 392 00:18:36,167 --> 00:18:37,600 Yeah, I think it will be. 393 00:18:37,601 --> 00:18:40,537 Are you concerned your parents might not approve of Leonard? 394 00:18:40,538 --> 00:18:42,272 A little. 395 00:18:42,273 --> 00:18:44,174 They're very old-fashioned. 396 00:18:44,175 --> 00:18:45,742 Well, I wouldn't worry about it. 397 00:18:45,743 --> 00:18:47,944 It's not like you guys are getting engaged, right? 398 00:18:50,080 --> 00:18:53,116 Oh, God, no. We're not there yet. 399 00:18:53,117 --> 00:18:55,952 Not engaged. Very interesting. 400 00:18:55,953 --> 00:18:57,320 I have to tinkle. 401 00:18:57,321 --> 00:18:59,255 You've been in there a lot tonight. Are you okay? 402 00:18:59,256 --> 00:19:02,792 Yes. Are you writing a book? 403 00:19:02,793 --> 00:19:04,928 Why are you getting upset? 404 00:19:04,929 --> 00:19:07,597 I'm not upset. Maybe you're upset. 405 00:19:07,598 --> 00:19:09,899 What's up with you? 406 00:19:12,436 --> 00:19:14,270 Bernadette? 407 00:19:15,172 --> 00:19:17,607 I can't do this anymore! 408 00:19:17,608 --> 00:19:19,742 I'm a good girl! 409 00:19:19,743 --> 00:19:22,078 I went to Catholic school! 410 00:19:23,113 --> 00:19:25,081 Okay, well, it's getting late. 411 00:19:25,082 --> 00:19:28,518 This was terrific. 412 00:19:28,519 --> 00:19:30,186 You win. 413 00:19:30,187 --> 00:19:32,088 Bernie? 414 00:19:34,983 --> 00:19:39,053 I think the word you're looking for is "befuddled." 415 00:19:44,885 --> 00:19:51,157 My catapult flings my bishop 416 00:19:51,158 --> 00:19:55,461 to Howard's Queen's Gorilla two. 417 00:19:55,462 --> 00:19:57,263 Nice. 418 00:19:57,264 --> 00:20:01,868 Okay, rook to transporter pad. 419 00:20:01,869 --> 00:20:05,071 And he comes out at... 420 00:20:06,874 --> 00:20:10,159 ...Leonard's Queen's Bishop five-and-a-third. 421 00:20:10,160 --> 00:20:12,311 Check on Leonard. 422 00:20:12,312 --> 00:20:15,715 Hang on. 423 00:20:15,716 --> 00:20:19,986 When is my pawn allowed to use the golf cart? 424 00:20:19,987 --> 00:20:21,804 When it's done charging. 425 00:20:21,805 --> 00:20:23,689 Or you land on the time machine. 426 00:20:23,690 --> 00:20:26,092 Obviously. 427 00:20:26,093 --> 00:20:28,861 Oh, oh... 428 00:20:28,862 --> 00:20:32,615 Beekeeper to King 12. 429 00:20:32,616 --> 00:20:37,670 I capture your pope and release the swarm. 430 00:20:38,939 --> 00:20:41,174 Checkmate on Sheldon. 431 00:20:41,175 --> 00:20:45,611 I knew I should've given my pope the jet pack. 432 00:20:45,612 --> 00:20:46,846 Hey, I've got winners. 433 00:20:46,847 --> 00:20:50,347 == sync, corrected by elderman ==