1
00:00:03,448 --> 00:00:04,440
Morning.
2
00:00:05,018 --> 00:00:06,218
Morning.
3
00:00:07,178 --> 00:00:09,213
- Sleep okay?
- Um uh. Great!
4
00:00:11,638 --> 00:00:13,211
Hey, can I ask you something?
5
00:00:13,236 --> 00:00:14,436
Sure.
6
00:00:14,655 --> 00:00:17,396
Last night, me wanting to try
that stuff out of the Kama Sutra.
7
00:00:17,787 --> 00:00:20,366
Was that fun for you
or kinda racially insensitive?
8
00:00:21,534 --> 00:00:24,158
Yes. Just because you're in bed
with an India woman
9
00:00:24,183 --> 00:00:25,631
you think that gives you permission
10
00:00:25,656 --> 00:00:28,750
to use crazy positions
from an ancient Indian love manual.
11
00:00:29,394 --> 00:00:32,392
Hey, if you can find a book
called "Weird Sex with White Boys"
12
00:00:32,417 --> 00:00:33,671
I'd be okay with that.
13
00:00:36,128 --> 00:00:38,877
No, no, you know you have such
beautiful eyes.
14
00:00:39,747 --> 00:00:41,103
Have you ever thought about
getting contacts?
15
00:00:41,128 --> 00:00:44,009
I tried in the seventh grade.
I could never get used to them.
16
00:00:44,034 --> 00:00:45,234
Oh. That's too bad.
17
00:00:45,259 --> 00:00:47,963
Yeah. If I had contacts,
I would have been the coolest
18
00:00:47,988 --> 00:00:50,996
Debate Club president ever to be
stuffed into his own cello case.
19
00:00:53,254 --> 00:00:56,973
If you had them on now, you could
see what we're going to do next.
20
00:01:00,343 --> 00:01:02,449
That-That's okay.
I can infer from context.
21
00:01:05,675 --> 00:01:07,624
Hey, Raj, you wanna see a new
magic trick I been working on?
22
00:01:07,649 --> 00:01:08,849
Eh, Howard.
23
00:01:08,874 --> 00:01:11,942
If I may interject here
with a piece of friendly advice.
24
00:01:11,967 --> 00:01:15,781
Is working on magic tricks, really
how you want to spend your time?
25
00:01:16,496 --> 00:01:19,589
Uh, granted,
you're just an engineer, but...
26
00:01:20,555 --> 00:01:24,067
That doesn't mean you might
not someday build a geegaw
27
00:01:24,092 --> 00:01:25,292
or a thingamabob that
28
00:01:25,317 --> 00:01:29,869
that may get you a "thank you" in someone
else's Nobel Prize acceptance speech.
29
00:01:34,685 --> 00:01:36,729
Is the trick making him disappear?
30
00:01:39,184 --> 00:01:40,384
Sure, let's see it.
31
00:01:41,504 --> 00:01:43,285
Here.
Shuffle these.
32
00:01:43,310 --> 00:01:44,510
Okay.
33
00:01:45,750 --> 00:01:47,540
Now spread them out on the table.
Face down.
34
00:01:48,166 --> 00:01:49,534
Pick one.
Look at it.
35
00:01:49,559 --> 00:01:50,759
Okay.
36
00:01:50,784 --> 00:01:52,752
Now remember your card.
Put it back in the deck.
37
00:01:52,777 --> 00:01:54,682
Is it any wonder
he doesn't have a doctorate?
38
00:01:56,906 --> 00:01:58,632
Now remind me,
what's your birthday?
39
00:01:58,657 --> 00:01:59,857
October sixth.
40
00:02:00,430 --> 00:02:03,302
Okay, October is the tenth month.
41
00:02:03,327 --> 00:02:07,863
So 10-- one plus zero
is one plus six is seven.
42
00:02:07,888 --> 00:02:09,088
Turn over the seventh card.
43
00:02:12,990 --> 00:02:13,942
How about that!
44
00:02:13,967 --> 00:02:15,167
But, is that your card?
45
00:02:15,192 --> 00:02:16,671
Yes. It is.
Very cool!
46
00:02:18,790 --> 00:02:20,390
Oh it's not cool.
47
00:02:20,423 --> 00:02:25,287
It's a childish trick, designed
to confuse and intrigue simpletons.
48
00:02:26,301 --> 00:02:27,501
How'd you do it?
49
00:02:28,347 --> 00:02:30,558
A magician never reveals his secrets.
50
00:02:30,583 --> 00:02:33,403
But surely a future
Nobel Prize winner can figure it out.
51
00:02:35,850 --> 00:02:36,850
Fine.
52
00:02:36,875 --> 00:02:38,075
Give me a second.
53
00:02:41,792 --> 00:02:45,116
You ever notice when he thinks
real hard it smells like bacon?
54
00:02:48,955 --> 00:02:50,155
- Oh hey!
- Sorry! Oop!
55
00:02:58,425 --> 00:03:01,015
Check it out.
I just got contacts.
56
00:03:04,509 --> 00:03:08,128
♪ Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ♪
57
00:03:08,129 --> 00:03:11,464
♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ♪
58
00:03:11,465 --> 00:03:13,099
♪ The Earth began to cool ♪
59
00:03:13,100 --> 00:03:15,635
♪ The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ♪
60
00:03:15,636 --> 00:03:18,321
♪ We built the Wall ♪
♪ We built the pyramids ♪
61
00:03:18,322 --> 00:03:20,957
♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪
62
00:03:20,958 --> 00:03:22,893
♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪
63
00:03:22,894 --> 00:03:23,873
♪ Bang! ♪
64
00:03:23,886 --> 00:03:27,386
♪ The Big Bang Theory 4x18 ♪
The Prestidigitation Approximation
Original Air Date on March 10, 2011
65
00:03:27,411 --> 00:03:30,911
-- sync, corrected by elderman --
66
00:03:33,059 --> 00:03:34,844
One, two,
67
00:03:34,914 --> 00:03:37,382
three, four, five.
68
00:03:37,383 --> 00:03:38,233
No way.
69
00:03:38,234 --> 00:03:39,217
That's your card, right?
70
00:03:39,218 --> 00:03:40,718
Seven of clubs!
71
00:03:40,719 --> 00:03:42,086
That is amazing!
72
00:03:42,087 --> 00:03:45,423
It's not amazing.
73
00:03:47,059 --> 00:03:49,060
All magic tricks are merely
a combination
74
00:03:49,061 --> 00:03:50,762
of manipulation
and misdirection
75
00:03:50,763 --> 00:03:55,399
with the occasional dwarf in
a box wiggling his feet.
76
00:03:56,302 --> 00:03:58,369
Oh, really?
So how did I do it?
77
00:03:58,370 --> 00:03:59,971
I don't care how you did it.
78
00:03:59,972 --> 00:04:03,741
I have more important things
to think about.
79
00:04:07,379 --> 00:04:10,615
Clearly, the cards
are marked.
80
00:04:10,616 --> 00:04:12,984
I thought you had more important
things to think about.
81
00:04:12,985 --> 00:04:14,752
I do.
You just happened
82
00:04:14,753 --> 00:04:16,654
to have caught me
on a break.
83
00:04:18,090 --> 00:04:21,392
Oh, let me see
those cards.
84
00:04:21,393 --> 00:04:22,727
Big deal. Not knowing
85
00:04:22,728 --> 00:04:24,262
is part of the fun.
86
00:04:24,263 --> 00:04:26,130
"Not knowing is part
of the fun."
87
00:04:26,131 --> 00:04:28,099
Was that the motto
of your community college?
88
00:04:30,202 --> 00:04:32,570
Hey, guys,
what do you think?
89
00:04:32,571 --> 00:04:34,038
Priya took me
clothes shopping.
90
00:04:34,039 --> 00:04:35,256
Hey, you look great.
91
00:04:35,257 --> 00:04:36,407
Good for you, Priya.
92
00:04:36,408 --> 00:04:38,376
I could never get that stupid
hoodie off him
93
00:04:38,377 --> 00:04:39,344
when we were...
94
00:04:39,345 --> 00:04:40,478
Well, you look great.
95
00:04:40,479 --> 00:04:41,913
Thank you.
96
00:04:41,914 --> 00:04:43,548
Lets go hang
everything up.
97
00:04:43,549 --> 00:04:44,966
Yeah, good.
98
00:04:46,719 --> 00:04:48,252
New contacts.
99
00:04:48,253 --> 00:04:50,588
I should have done this
years ago.
100
00:04:52,825 --> 00:04:56,127
So you finally getting used to
them doing it on a daily basis?
101
00:04:56,128 --> 00:04:57,262
I'm not going out with him.
102
00:04:57,263 --> 00:04:58,730
He can sleep
with whoever he wants.
103
00:04:58,731 --> 00:05:01,466
Yeah, I was talking to Raj.
104
00:05:05,905 --> 00:05:08,006
Oopsy.
105
00:05:08,007 --> 00:05:09,541
This deck is rigged in
some fashion.
106
00:05:09,542 --> 00:05:10,508
Fine. Get another deck
107
00:05:10,509 --> 00:05:11,843
and I'll do
the trick with that.
108
00:05:11,844 --> 00:05:13,444
So you're saying this is
a regulation deck?
109
00:05:13,445 --> 00:05:16,347
I'm saying believe in magic,
you muggle.
110
00:05:19,885 --> 00:05:22,820
You know, well, I'm happy
Leonard's found someone.
111
00:05:24,990 --> 00:05:27,392
Not that anybody asked.
112
00:05:31,997 --> 00:05:34,599
How many Star Trek uniforms
do you have?
113
00:05:34,600 --> 00:05:36,985
Just two:
114
00:05:36,986 --> 00:05:39,470
everyday and dress.
115
00:05:39,471 --> 00:05:41,138
Uh-huh.
116
00:05:41,139 --> 00:05:44,308
Listen, we need
to talk about something.
117
00:05:44,309 --> 00:05:46,444
Oh, my God, you're breaking up
with me!
118
00:05:47,246 --> 00:05:48,713
Why would you take me out
shopping
119
00:05:48,714 --> 00:05:51,149
and then break up with me?
That is so cruel!
120
00:05:51,150 --> 00:05:54,052
Leonard, I'm not breaking up
with you.
121
00:05:54,053 --> 00:05:56,004
Oh, okay.
122
00:05:59,291 --> 00:06:01,843
So, what's up?
123
00:06:01,844 --> 00:06:04,162
It's a little weird,
124
00:06:04,163 --> 00:06:07,331
your ex-girlfriend hanging out
here all the time.
125
00:06:07,332 --> 00:06:08,433
I know.
126
00:06:08,434 --> 00:06:10,001
I usually never see
my ex-girlfriends,
127
00:06:10,002 --> 00:06:12,437
unless their hard drives crash.
128
00:06:12,438 --> 00:06:16,908
I'm just saying, how would you
feel if I was hanging out
129
00:06:16,909 --> 00:06:18,276
with my ex-boyfriend?
130
00:06:18,277 --> 00:06:19,711
Um, not great, I guess.
131
00:06:19,712 --> 00:06:21,579
But Penny and I are
just friends.
132
00:06:21,580 --> 00:06:22,947
I don't care.
133
00:06:22,948 --> 00:06:24,816
This is a woman you have
slept with.
134
00:06:24,817 --> 00:06:26,200
If you want her around,
135
00:06:26,201 --> 00:06:29,520
then I have to wonder if maybe
you're not ready to move on.
136
00:06:29,521 --> 00:06:31,239
No, no-no-no, I'm ready!
137
00:06:31,240 --> 00:06:33,758
I gave up the gift of
sight for you.
138
00:06:33,759 --> 00:06:35,393
If that's not moving on,
what is?
139
00:06:35,394 --> 00:06:38,663
You need to cut the cord
with Penny.
140
00:06:38,664 --> 00:06:41,032
Oh... okay.
141
00:06:41,033 --> 00:06:43,367
You don't sound very confident.
142
00:06:43,368 --> 00:06:44,969
No, no, I'm confident.
143
00:06:44,970 --> 00:06:47,405
Its not like I'm unfamiliar with
the "get lost" conversation.
144
00:06:47,406 --> 00:06:50,541
Although, this will be the first
time I'll be the one saying it.
145
00:06:50,542 --> 00:06:52,710
Thank you.
146
00:06:52,711 --> 00:06:54,045
I appreciate it.
147
00:06:54,046 --> 00:06:55,313
Sure.
148
00:06:55,314 --> 00:06:57,782
Oh, God, you
smell so good.
149
00:06:57,783 --> 00:06:59,817
Of course, that
could just be
150
00:06:59,818 --> 00:07:01,736
my other senses
getting stronger.
151
00:07:04,790 --> 00:07:08,793
Hypothetically, if I had access
152
00:07:08,794 --> 00:07:13,398
to a Lieutenant Uhura uniform,
would you wear it?
153
00:07:13,399 --> 00:07:15,633
Leonard, it is a source
of great pain
154
00:07:15,634 --> 00:07:16,768
to me and my family
155
00:07:16,769 --> 00:07:18,936
that my brother has that outfit
in his wardrobe.
156
00:07:18,937 --> 00:07:20,438
Can we not discuss it?
157
00:07:20,439 --> 00:07:23,207
I'm sorry. Never mind.
158
00:07:27,346 --> 00:07:29,147
And was your card the jack
of diamonds?
159
00:07:29,148 --> 00:07:33,551
Oh, unbelievable!
160
00:07:36,822 --> 00:07:38,222
Know how he did it yet?
161
00:07:43,195 --> 00:07:44,762
Um...
162
00:07:44,763 --> 00:07:47,965
Aw, he has the same look
my little nephew gets
163
00:07:47,966 --> 00:07:50,768
when he can't figure out
how I got his nose.
164
00:07:54,073 --> 00:07:56,374
You know, I have some remedial
magic tricks
165
00:07:56,375 --> 00:07:58,142
that might be more your speed.
166
00:07:58,143 --> 00:07:59,577
Like, ooh, look!
167
00:08:00,746 --> 00:08:02,914
The pencil's rubber!
168
00:08:04,416 --> 00:08:07,385
Hey, I think I know how you did
the card trick.
169
00:08:07,386 --> 00:08:10,755
Oh, please, if I don't know,
you don't know.
170
00:08:10,756 --> 00:08:12,407
That's axiomatic.
171
00:08:12,408 --> 00:08:14,292
Come here.
172
00:08:15,427 --> 00:08:17,128
You're right.
173
00:08:18,897 --> 00:08:20,565
Not too bad for someone
174
00:08:20,566 --> 00:08:23,101
who doesn't know
what "axiomatic" means.
175
00:08:30,175 --> 00:08:31,976
Oh, hi.
176
00:08:31,977 --> 00:08:33,310
Hey, you.
177
00:08:33,311 --> 00:08:34,812
What happened with
the contacts?
178
00:08:34,813 --> 00:08:36,080
One of them's upstairs.
179
00:08:36,081 --> 00:08:39,650
The other one sort of slipped
back into my skull.
180
00:08:39,651 --> 00:08:42,003
Hey, is that one of the new
shirts Priya got you?
181
00:08:42,004 --> 00:08:43,287
Yeah.
182
00:08:43,288 --> 00:08:44,922
You don't wanna
wash that.
183
00:08:44,923 --> 00:08:46,791
No?
No, that's silk.
184
00:08:46,792 --> 00:08:49,010
Seriously, what would you do
without me?
185
00:08:49,011 --> 00:08:50,895
Yeah.
186
00:08:52,765 --> 00:08:54,682
You know, I gotta
tell you, I think
187
00:08:54,683 --> 00:08:57,268
you got a real winner with Priya.
Yeah, me, too.
188
00:08:57,269 --> 00:08:58,636
She seems really sweet.
189
00:08:58,637 --> 00:09:00,805
Believe me, you do not want
to take that for granted.
190
00:09:00,806 --> 00:09:03,574
There are a lot of bitches
out there.
191
00:09:03,575 --> 00:09:07,979
Yeah, bitches are the worst.
192
00:09:07,980 --> 00:09:09,847
All right, I'll
see you later.
193
00:09:09,848 --> 00:09:12,550
Uh, Penny, there's something
I have to tell you.
194
00:09:12,551 --> 00:09:13,684
What?
195
00:09:13,685 --> 00:09:16,454
Okay, uh, how do I put this?
196
00:09:16,455 --> 00:09:21,125
Um... are you familiar with
Darwin's observation
197
00:09:21,126 --> 00:09:24,195
of the finches
in the Galapagos Islands?
198
00:09:24,196 --> 00:09:26,497
Did they make a movie about it?
199
00:09:26,498 --> 00:09:28,199
No.
200
00:09:28,200 --> 00:09:30,134
Then no.
201
00:09:30,135 --> 00:09:33,938
All right, well, anyway, Darwin
observed that when two groups
202
00:09:33,939 --> 00:09:36,340
of finches competed
over the same food source,
203
00:09:36,341 --> 00:09:39,544
eventually one of them would
evolve a different beak shape
204
00:09:39,545 --> 00:09:42,213
so they could feed on
something else.
205
00:09:42,214 --> 00:09:44,816
Okay.
206
00:09:44,817 --> 00:09:48,085
So what do you think we can
learn from that behavior
207
00:09:48,086 --> 00:09:50,521
that we can apply
to our own lives?
208
00:09:51,623 --> 00:09:55,560
Uh, a bird in the hand is worth
two in the bush?
209
00:09:57,362 --> 00:10:01,199
Sure, that has birds in it.
210
00:10:02,568 --> 00:10:05,870
It's fun talking to you,
Leonard; I always learn stuff.
211
00:10:09,007 --> 00:10:11,742
I'm sorry,
but I'm gonna count that.
212
00:10:15,814 --> 00:10:19,217
Do you really have
to wear that in bed?
213
00:10:22,321 --> 00:10:25,656
Yeah. The doctor didn't want me
to rub my eye during the night.
214
00:10:25,657 --> 00:10:29,193
It was either this or one
of those giant neck cones.
215
00:10:29,194 --> 00:10:33,598
So did you get
to talk to Penny?
216
00:10:33,599 --> 00:10:37,301
Oh, yes.
Indeed, I did.
217
00:10:37,302 --> 00:10:39,003
And?
218
00:10:39,004 --> 00:10:41,806
She completely understood
everything I said. Case closed.
219
00:10:41,807 --> 00:10:43,441
Was she upset?
220
00:10:43,442 --> 00:10:46,744
Maybe, but that's
not my problem.
221
00:10:46,745 --> 00:10:48,713
She's not my girlfriend,
you are.
222
00:10:48,714 --> 00:10:51,716
I hope you weren't
cruel to her.
223
00:10:51,717 --> 00:10:56,120
Is the autumn cruel
for letting the flowers die,
224
00:10:56,121 --> 00:10:59,023
or is that just nature's way?
225
00:11:02,160 --> 00:11:03,995
Leonard?
Leonard?
226
00:11:03,996 --> 00:11:05,129
Leonard?
227
00:11:05,130 --> 00:11:06,631
What?!
228
00:11:06,632 --> 00:11:09,367
I think I figured out
Wolowitz's magic trick,
229
00:11:09,368 --> 00:11:12,536
and I need you
to pick a card.
230
00:11:14,072 --> 00:11:17,074
I am not opening
that door, Sheldon!
231
00:11:17,075 --> 00:11:18,409
As you wish.
232
00:11:23,515 --> 00:11:28,052
Pick a card, put it back,
and prepare to be amazed.
233
00:11:30,055 --> 00:11:32,056
Did you pick one?
234
00:11:32,057 --> 00:11:33,491
Yep.
235
00:11:35,994 --> 00:11:38,496
Is this your card?
236
00:11:38,497 --> 00:11:39,764
Nope.
237
00:11:39,765 --> 00:11:41,966
Drat.
238
00:11:43,101 --> 00:11:45,436
Is this your card?
239
00:11:45,437 --> 00:11:47,605
No.
240
00:11:47,606 --> 00:11:49,674
I'll be right back.
241
00:11:57,434 --> 00:11:58,834
Pick a card, Sheldon.
242
00:12:00,437 --> 00:12:04,273
Now look at it,
and put it back in the deck.
243
00:12:06,310 --> 00:12:07,843
Now do you remember your card?
244
00:12:07,844 --> 00:12:09,946
Of course I do, I have
an eidetic memory.
245
00:12:09,947 --> 00:12:11,714
My apologies.
246
00:12:11,715 --> 00:12:14,183
Now shuffle the cards.
247
00:12:14,184 --> 00:12:16,686
Shuffling.
248
00:12:16,687 --> 00:12:18,421
Wait here.
249
00:12:20,808 --> 00:12:23,893
Processing image,
cross-referencing...
250
00:12:23,894 --> 00:12:25,661
Whatcha doin'?
251
00:12:25,662 --> 00:12:28,698
I'm reverse engineering
Wolowitz's magic trick.
252
00:12:28,699 --> 00:12:32,802
What's up
with the infrared cameras?
253
00:12:32,803 --> 00:12:35,304
I'm measuring residual heat
levels on the playing cards
254
00:12:35,305 --> 00:12:36,906
to determine
which one's been touched.
255
00:12:36,907 --> 00:12:38,775
By the way,
256
00:12:38,776 --> 00:12:40,176
if you hope to have children,
257
00:12:40,177 --> 00:12:42,045
I suggest you switch
from briefs to boxers.
258
00:12:42,046 --> 00:12:43,946
Your testicles look a tad warm.
259
00:12:51,822 --> 00:12:54,824
Holy crap,
are you connected
260
00:12:54,825 --> 00:12:56,993
to the Oak Ridge
National Laboratory?
261
00:12:56,994 --> 00:12:59,562
Yes. I'm using their
Cray supercomputer
262
00:12:59,563 --> 00:13:00,863
to analyze
shuffling patterns.
263
00:13:00,864 --> 00:13:03,800
Sheldon, that computer
is used
264
00:13:03,801 --> 00:13:05,068
for national defense.
265
00:13:05,069 --> 00:13:06,736
Hacking into it is
a federal crime.
266
00:13:06,737 --> 00:13:09,906
Relax, we're not under
attack right now.
267
00:13:09,907 --> 00:13:15,545
Okay, I'm leaving before the
black helicopters get here.
268
00:13:16,713 --> 00:13:20,283
And is this my card?
269
00:13:20,284 --> 00:13:22,718
Rats!
270
00:13:25,489 --> 00:13:29,025
I wonder if Howard used
a radioactive tracer.
271
00:13:29,026 --> 00:13:32,929
Where am I going to find
uranium-235 this time of night?
272
00:13:35,933 --> 00:13:38,134
Come on, CraigsList.
273
00:13:42,272 --> 00:13:45,308
Is it racist that I took you
to an Indian restaurant?
274
00:13:45,309 --> 00:13:48,778
It's okay, I like Indian food.
275
00:13:48,779 --> 00:13:52,248
Or as you probably call it
back home, "food."
276
00:13:52,249 --> 00:13:55,184
Why didn't you wear
your contacts?
277
00:13:55,185 --> 00:13:56,486
Don't you like them?
278
00:13:56,487 --> 00:13:57,753
No, no, I do.
279
00:13:57,754 --> 00:13:59,822
It's just I knew I was having
curry tonight
280
00:13:59,823 --> 00:14:03,359
and I only want one part
of my body to burn at a time.
281
00:14:05,195 --> 00:14:07,330
You know...
282
00:14:07,331 --> 00:14:10,233
...my company offered me a
position here in Los Angeles.
283
00:14:10,234 --> 00:14:14,337
Does that mean you'd relocate
here permanently?
284
00:14:14,338 --> 00:14:16,873
Maybe. What do you think?
285
00:14:16,874 --> 00:14:19,208
I love it.
286
00:14:19,209 --> 00:14:21,177
That's great!
287
00:14:21,178 --> 00:14:24,313
Hi!
288
00:14:25,015 --> 00:14:27,817
Hi! Just hang on.
289
00:14:27,818 --> 00:14:30,953
Small world.
290
00:14:30,954 --> 00:14:32,121
You did talk to her, didn't you?
291
00:14:32,122 --> 00:14:34,724
Of course, I did.
I talked and talked and talked.
292
00:14:35,843 --> 00:14:39,828
Hey! Look at Leonard in his
fancy-ass grownup clothes.
293
00:14:41,265 --> 00:14:43,499
Way to go, Priya.
For once, he doesn't look
294
00:14:43,500 --> 00:14:45,835
like a mannequin in
the boys' department.
295
00:14:47,304 --> 00:14:48,604
Hey, did he
296
00:14:48,605 --> 00:14:50,373
tell you I saved
the silk shirt?
297
00:14:50,374 --> 00:14:51,741
No, he did not.
298
00:14:51,742 --> 00:14:53,843
He was gonna throw it
in the washing machine
299
00:14:53,844 --> 00:14:56,546
with his
Spiderman underwear.
300
00:14:56,547 --> 00:14:58,314
That's our Lenny, huh?
301
00:14:58,315 --> 00:15:01,284
Yes, that's our Lenny.
302
00:15:01,285 --> 00:15:03,536
So how's
the food here?
303
00:15:03,537 --> 00:15:06,405
Oh, wow, that is
really, really good.
304
00:15:06,406 --> 00:15:08,407
Oh, I'm sorry.
You guys are on a date.
305
00:15:08,408 --> 00:15:10,326
We can hang out
anytime. Have fun.
306
00:15:10,327 --> 00:15:11,661
Bye.
Good night.
307
00:15:13,080 --> 00:15:14,997
Oh, that's, hot, hot, hot, hot!
308
00:15:17,367 --> 00:15:20,086
Whoo! It really
sneaks up on ya, huh?
309
00:15:20,087 --> 00:15:21,504
All right, I gotta go.
310
00:15:25,909 --> 00:15:28,945
It is pretty spicy.
311
00:15:31,415 --> 00:15:33,516
Oh, I've been meaning
to tell you,
312
00:15:33,517 --> 00:15:35,785
I figured out
your magic trick.
313
00:15:35,786 --> 00:15:37,587
Really?
314
00:15:37,588 --> 00:15:38,788
Oh, yes.
315
00:15:38,789 --> 00:15:41,257
In fact, I improved upon it.
316
00:15:41,858 --> 00:15:43,226
I'd love to see that.
317
00:15:43,227 --> 00:15:44,493
How about you, Raj?
318
00:15:44,494 --> 00:15:46,329
Beefaroni and a show?
319
00:15:46,330 --> 00:15:48,030
How do you turn that down?
320
00:15:48,031 --> 00:15:52,902
All right.
321
00:15:52,903 --> 00:15:54,570
Pick a card.
322
00:15:54,571 --> 00:15:56,839
Okay.
323
00:15:57,908 --> 00:15:59,408
Bippity-boppity-boo.
324
00:16:08,785 --> 00:16:12,121
What's with the wand
and the beep?
325
00:16:12,122 --> 00:16:13,889
The wand is called showmanship,
326
00:16:13,890 --> 00:16:16,259
and the beep is none
of your business.
327
00:16:18,428 --> 00:16:19,495
Oh! Excuse me.
328
00:16:19,496 --> 00:16:21,030
I'm getting a text message
329
00:16:21,031 --> 00:16:23,599
completely unrelated
to this magic trick.
330
00:16:23,600 --> 00:16:27,203
Oh, look, my
dry cleaning's ready.
331
00:16:27,204 --> 00:16:31,107
And your card was
the five of spades. Ta-da.
332
00:16:31,108 --> 00:16:34,877
These cards have barcodes
on them.
333
00:16:34,878 --> 00:16:35,944
The wand is a reader.
334
00:16:35,945 --> 00:16:37,947
It's transmitting to your phone.
335
00:16:41,618 --> 00:16:43,719
I said, "ta-da."
336
00:16:43,720 --> 00:16:44,787
Show's over.
337
00:16:44,788 --> 00:16:47,089
That's pathetic.
338
00:16:47,090 --> 00:16:49,792
Let me show you how
a real magician does it.
339
00:16:49,793 --> 00:16:51,126
Raj, take a card.
340
00:16:51,127 --> 00:16:52,995
Don't let me see it.
341
00:16:52,996 --> 00:16:55,331
Okay.
342
00:16:55,332 --> 00:16:56,832
Three of clubs.
343
00:16:56,833 --> 00:16:58,234
Son of a gun,
344
00:16:58,235 --> 00:16:59,769
you're blowing my mind!
345
00:17:02,873 --> 00:17:05,474
Bippity-boppity-boo-yah!
346
00:17:07,444 --> 00:17:10,446
That does it.
I'm getting uranium.
347
00:17:15,252 --> 00:17:16,652
You ever gonna tell him?
348
00:17:16,653 --> 00:17:19,822
Maybe.
When it stops being fun.
349
00:17:19,823 --> 00:17:22,308
So never.
350
00:17:30,133 --> 00:17:31,967
Oh, hey, I was
just on my way to work.
351
00:17:31,968 --> 00:17:33,436
Oh, okay,
its not important.
352
00:17:33,437 --> 00:17:34,403
It can wait.
353
00:17:34,404 --> 00:17:36,022
No, it's all right.
Walk me down.
354
00:17:36,023 --> 00:17:37,023
So, what's up?
355
00:17:37,024 --> 00:17:38,708
Uh, I kind of have
a problem
356
00:17:38,709 --> 00:17:40,710
I was hoping
you could help me with.
357
00:17:40,711 --> 00:17:41,777
Sure, anything.
358
00:17:41,778 --> 00:17:44,280
Move out.
359
00:17:44,281 --> 00:17:45,648
What?
360
00:17:45,649 --> 00:17:46,982
Not far.
361
00:17:46,983 --> 00:17:49,051
Hey, if you ever wanna
start a family,
362
00:17:49,052 --> 00:17:50,903
La Cañada has
some great schools.
363
00:17:50,904 --> 00:17:52,321
Okay, I'm not
moving anywhere.
364
00:17:52,322 --> 00:17:54,457
What the hell
is this all about?
365
00:17:54,458 --> 00:17:57,026
Why does it have
to be about anything?
366
00:17:57,027 --> 00:17:59,128
Can't a fella ask
his buddy to relocate,
367
00:17:59,129 --> 00:18:01,230
no questions asked?
368
00:18:01,231 --> 00:18:02,631
Oh, for God's sake,
Leonard,
369
00:18:02,632 --> 00:18:04,133
this is about Priya,
isn't it?
370
00:18:04,134 --> 00:18:05,868
She doesn't want me
hanging out with you.
371
00:18:05,869 --> 00:18:09,038
Yes. There, I said it.
372
00:18:10,240 --> 00:18:11,841
Okay, look.
373
00:18:11,842 --> 00:18:14,009
I happen to like
your girlfriend.
374
00:18:14,010 --> 00:18:14,927
And she likes you.
375
00:18:14,928 --> 00:18:15,578
No, she doesn't.
376
00:18:15,579 --> 00:18:17,313
Not really, no.
377
00:18:17,314 --> 00:18:19,248
It doesn't matter.
Look, I promise from now on
378
00:18:19,249 --> 00:18:20,716
I will keep
my distance from you.
379
00:18:20,717 --> 00:18:23,119
Well, now, hold on.
What kind of distance
380
00:18:23,120 --> 00:18:25,054
are we talking about?
Because we are neighbors.
381
00:18:25,055 --> 00:18:27,356
I mean, I can hear the toilet
flush in your apartment.
382
00:18:27,357 --> 00:18:29,992
You can hear my toilet flush?
383
00:18:29,993 --> 00:18:32,561
I don't listen for it,
but it's nice to know
384
00:18:32,562 --> 00:18:36,132
everything's okay
with your plumbing.
385
00:18:36,133 --> 00:18:38,000
The building's plumbing.
386
00:18:38,001 --> 00:18:39,201
Leonard, I get it.
387
00:18:39,202 --> 00:18:40,669
You're in
a new relationship now.
388
00:18:40,670 --> 00:18:41,904
And I'm happy for you.
389
00:18:41,905 --> 00:18:44,373
So why don't we just shake
hands and part friends?
390
00:18:44,374 --> 00:18:45,574
Well, now hold on.
391
00:18:45,575 --> 00:18:46,809
How about this?
392
00:18:46,810 --> 00:18:50,012
How about we still hang out,
but on the down-low?
393
00:18:50,013 --> 00:18:53,549
Are you really that kind of guy?
394
00:18:53,550 --> 00:18:55,217
No.
395
00:18:55,218 --> 00:18:59,422
I actually felt kinda silly just
saying "on the down-low."
396
00:19:01,191 --> 00:19:02,975
Good-bye, Leonard.
397
00:19:04,995 --> 00:19:07,563
Penny, wait.
398
00:19:08,398 --> 00:19:11,066
Ah!
399
00:19:14,604 --> 00:19:16,839
Damn contacts.
400
00:19:23,379 --> 00:19:24,529
Incoming.
401
00:19:25,531 --> 00:19:28,116
- Hi!
- Hey!
402
00:19:28,117 --> 00:19:29,367
Hello.
403
00:19:29,368 --> 00:19:33,371
Why so glum, chum?
404
00:19:33,372 --> 00:19:35,373
Apparently,
you can't hack into
405
00:19:35,374 --> 00:19:37,342
a government
supercomputer
406
00:19:37,343 --> 00:19:38,943
and then try
to buy uranium
407
00:19:38,944 --> 00:19:41,079
without the Department of
Homeland Security tattling
408
00:19:41,080 --> 00:19:43,247
to your mother.
409
00:19:47,787 --> 00:19:49,120
Oh, that's too bad.
410
00:19:49,121 --> 00:19:50,689
Figure out the magic trick yet?
411
00:19:50,690 --> 00:19:52,991
Figure out the magic trick yet?
412
00:19:52,992 --> 00:19:55,226
Want me to tell you
how to do it?
413
00:19:55,227 --> 00:19:56,061
No.
414
00:19:56,062 --> 00:19:57,796
Ill show you one more time.
415
00:19:57,797 --> 00:19:59,397
Raj?
416
00:19:59,398 --> 00:20:01,099
Hang on.
417
00:20:01,100 --> 00:20:03,034
This time do it with me,
418
00:20:03,035 --> 00:20:06,337
so I can make sure
there's no monkey business.
419
00:20:08,157 --> 00:20:11,310
All right.
420
00:20:23,391 --> 00:20:25,106
Two of hearts.
I hate you.
421
00:20:25,124 --> 00:20:29,010
-- sync, corrected by elderman --
422
00:20:33,232 --> 00:20:35,667
Yeah, he's gonna win
the Nobel Prize.