1
00:00:12,040 --> 00:00:15,203
- May I help you, sir?
- Lonely are the insomniacs.

2
00:00:16,800 --> 00:00:21,044
I've been tossing and turning in my sleep,
and this blanket is very, very itchy.

3
00:00:21,120 --> 00:00:23,885
Could you please take it away?
If that's not too much trouble.

4
00:00:24,000 --> 00:00:26,446
- Of course.
- Thank you.

5
00:00:26,720 --> 00:00:27,960
- Oh!
- Oh.

6
00:00:28,560 --> 00:00:31,211
A stowaway. He's a big boy.

7
00:00:31,280 --> 00:00:33,601
I probably should have
bought him another seat.

8
00:00:33,720 --> 00:00:35,165
Maybe I should call the pilot.

9
00:00:35,240 --> 00:00:36,924
Well, I don't think he wants to meet him.

10
00:00:37,000 --> 00:00:41,801
You know, I've noticed that you haven't
asked me to put him back in his crib.

11
00:00:41,880 --> 00:00:44,281
- What are you doing?
- I'm writing down my number.

12
00:00:44,360 --> 00:00:46,408
Don't bother. I am not going to call you.

13
00:00:46,480 --> 00:00:48,482
No, no, no. This is my bank balance.

14
00:00:48,560 --> 00:00:52,690
And now you've seen my two biggest assets.

15
00:00:52,760 --> 00:00:57,243
If you don't mind, I'd like you to go to
the bathroom and get yourself prepared.

16
00:00:57,320 --> 00:00:58,970
If that's fine with you.

17
00:00:59,040 --> 00:01:01,327
Thank you again for being so helpful.

18
00:01:12,960 --> 00:01:14,724
You can open your eyes now.

19
00:01:14,800 --> 00:01:16,768
You saw that, yeah?

20
00:01:16,840 --> 00:01:18,683
That's how you do it.

21
00:01:20,640 --> 00:01:23,120
I'll be four and a half minutes.

22
00:01:29,880 --> 00:01:33,123
Order in the court. I object to this divorce.

23
00:01:33,200 --> 00:01:35,567
Lawyers, you've done a magnificent job

24
00:01:35,640 --> 00:01:37,847
of helping me butt-fuck my wife
in this settlement.

25
00:01:37,920 --> 00:01:39,763
But your services are no longer needed.

26
00:01:39,840 --> 00:01:41,285
Effective immediately, you're all fired.

27
00:01:41,360 --> 00:01:43,761
- What did you call us in here for?
- Overruled!

28
00:01:43,840 --> 00:01:46,286
Get the fuck out of here, God damn it. Now!

29
00:01:46,360 --> 00:01:49,125
Get those motherfucking attaches out of here.

30
00:01:49,200 --> 00:01:51,521
There's a special place
in hell for guys like you.

31
00:01:53,080 --> 00:01:54,923
April, I lost my way.

32
00:01:55,000 --> 00:01:57,526
I spent a lot of sleepless nights
wondering where I went wrong.

33
00:01:57,600 --> 00:01:59,284
But a great change has occurred.

34
00:02:00,280 --> 00:02:01,964
I love my family now.

35
00:02:02,040 --> 00:02:05,089
Now is not the time
to have this discussion, Kenny.

36
00:02:05,160 --> 00:02:07,970
- It's too late.
- It's only too late if we sign those documents.

37
00:02:08,040 --> 00:02:11,647
- Don't engage, April.
- You shut your mouth, you white hookey!

38
00:02:11,720 --> 00:02:13,006
(SPEAKS GIBBERISH)

39
00:02:13,440 --> 00:02:16,011
April, I've grown a lot as a man
since the holidays.

40
00:02:16,080 --> 00:02:19,926
Now all I ask of you is
to think about this decision.

41
00:02:20,000 --> 00:02:21,650
Search your feelings.

42
00:02:21,720 --> 00:02:24,963
If a week from now
your heart tells you this is the right move,

43
00:02:25,080 --> 00:02:27,003
then I'll gladly sign those papers.

44
00:02:28,160 --> 00:02:29,685
We can wait a week.

45
00:02:29,760 --> 00:02:31,330
Right?

46
00:02:32,480 --> 00:02:35,165
You made a wise decision here today.

47
00:02:36,560 --> 00:02:39,609
Let the thinking and contemplating
begin now.

48
00:02:43,880 --> 00:02:46,884
Everyone. Crew people. Laborers.

49
00:02:46,960 --> 00:02:49,281
Migrant workers.
Please, gather round. Everyone.

50
00:02:49,360 --> 00:02:51,681
I know a lot of you guys
are very upset with me

51
00:02:51,760 --> 00:02:54,411
for my behavior on the Christmas Special.

52
00:02:54,480 --> 00:02:57,370
I want to prove to you guys
that I am willing to turn over a new leaf.

53
00:02:58,080 --> 00:02:59,525
I'm gonna make a sacrifice right now.

54
00:02:59,600 --> 00:03:01,011
Billy, Trent.

55
00:03:01,080 --> 00:03:03,765
Please step-eth forward to-eth me. Thank you.

56
00:03:03,840 --> 00:03:07,162
Please remove your black Wilson Leather
jackets and place them upon the floor.

57
00:03:07,240 --> 00:03:08,651
You all behold this?

58
00:03:08,720 --> 00:03:11,485
These are my muscles. And look at them now.

59
00:03:11,560 --> 00:03:14,040
Just cheap black T-shirts.

60
00:03:14,120 --> 00:03:16,646
You're fired. Get the fuck outta here.

61
00:03:16,720 --> 00:03:19,007
True change. We're all capable of it.

62
00:03:19,080 --> 00:03:20,730
Let's fucking get this show back on track!

63
00:03:20,800 --> 00:03:22,689
- Let's...
- RONNIE: Mr. Powers.

64
00:03:22,760 --> 00:03:24,842
Mr. Powers. Sorry to interrupt,

65
00:03:24,920 --> 00:03:28,208
but before you apologize, perhaps
you'd like to hear what we have to say.

66
00:03:28,280 --> 00:03:31,443
I'm trying to bond with my crew right now.
So maybe this can wait, suit.

67
00:03:31,520 --> 00:03:33,887
My name is Ronnie Thelman.

68
00:03:33,960 --> 00:03:37,009
And this here is my friend's son, Jerome.

69
00:03:37,080 --> 00:03:40,050
I'm sorry, why do I care about
your family tree slash life story?

70
00:03:40,120 --> 00:03:43,169
Well, you see, I'm head of the network,
and therefore, your boss.

71
00:03:43,880 --> 00:03:47,089
Oh. My bad. Very fascinating story.
Please continue, I'm sorry.

72
00:03:47,160 --> 00:03:48,730
- Come here, Mr. Powers.
- Okay. Yeah.

73
00:03:48,800 --> 00:03:50,484
Come on.

74
00:03:51,600 --> 00:03:53,728
Kenny, I think you're great.

75
00:03:53,800 --> 00:03:55,165
I saw your Christmas Special,

76
00:03:55,240 --> 00:03:58,005
and I thought it was the most fantastic bit
of television I've ever seen.

77
00:03:58,080 --> 00:04:02,130
The fact that it was Christmas and yet you was
behaving in the most selfish manner was...

78
00:04:02,200 --> 00:04:04,567
It was a breath of fresh air.

79
00:04:04,680 --> 00:04:06,125
I wanna renew your contract.

80
00:04:06,200 --> 00:04:07,850
I wanna offer you a new show.

81
00:04:07,920 --> 00:04:10,446
- Your own show.
- Are you serious?

82
00:04:10,560 --> 00:04:13,370
Yeah. I want you to be
the next Ellen DeGeneres.

83
00:04:13,480 --> 00:04:15,926
Well, she's pretty dope, but she's a lesbian.

84
00:04:16,000 --> 00:04:17,001
I know she's a lesbian.

85
00:04:17,080 --> 00:04:18,684
I was in the meeting
where we decided she should be one.

86
00:04:18,760 --> 00:04:22,082
And I was in the meeting where we decided
that Ryan Seacrest should be straight.

87
00:04:22,160 --> 00:04:24,401
- That was a good call.
- You know what?

88
00:04:24,480 --> 00:04:26,608
I think for your first show, I've got the idea.

89
00:04:26,680 --> 00:04:29,684
It's gonna be a world exclusive interview
of Guy Young.

90
00:04:29,760 --> 00:04:31,808
First time since his fall from grace.

91
00:04:31,880 --> 00:04:34,281
Get him on the couch. Get him to apologize.

92
00:04:34,360 --> 00:04:37,091
You know, maybe shed some tears.
You know, really open up.

93
00:04:37,160 --> 00:04:39,447
Well, I mean, that sounds like
a great idea in theory,

94
00:04:39,520 --> 00:04:41,602
but Guy Young and myself
are not really friends.

95
00:04:41,680 --> 00:04:43,409
I mean, he's a mess.
I destroyed the man's life.

96
00:04:43,480 --> 00:04:44,447
I know you did.

97
00:04:44,520 --> 00:04:47,171
I mean, the thing is, you know,
you either want the show or you don't.

98
00:04:47,240 --> 00:04:49,208
No, no, no. You want Guy Young?

99
00:04:49,280 --> 00:04:51,647
- I'll get you Guy Young.
- Fantastic.

100
00:04:51,720 --> 00:04:53,484
Jerome, you look tired.

101
00:04:53,560 --> 00:04:55,085
Do you want a break?

102
00:04:55,160 --> 00:04:58,926
Any of you girls any good with children?

103
00:04:59,000 --> 00:05:00,764
Great. This is Jerome. He's 13 years old.

104
00:05:00,840 --> 00:05:04,401
Do you mind taking him into the other room
and sucking his willy off?

105
00:05:04,480 --> 00:05:06,209
STEVIE: Kenny.
MARIA: Kenny.

106
00:05:06,280 --> 00:05:08,248
- KENNY: There he is.
- Kenny's here.

107
00:05:08,320 --> 00:05:09,685
Looking good, champ.

108
00:05:09,760 --> 00:05:12,081
You think I look good.

109
00:05:12,160 --> 00:05:16,051
Look at all the little worker bees
tending to their queen.

110
00:05:16,120 --> 00:05:18,441
That's good, little muchachos,
helping your father.

111
00:05:18,520 --> 00:05:23,242
I tell you, trying to kill myself
was the best thing I ever did.

112
00:05:23,320 --> 00:05:25,084
- It's pretty awesome.
- Good?

113
00:05:25,160 --> 00:05:28,164
What a nice family. Thank you, guys.

114
00:05:28,240 --> 00:05:30,891
Look at us, man.
Two dudes on the mend, huh?

115
00:05:30,960 --> 00:05:33,930
With this new television show, we're gonna be
more famous than Oprah Winfrey.

116
00:05:34,000 --> 00:05:37,288
Speaking of, I read your screenplay.

117
00:05:37,360 --> 00:05:39,522
Finally, motherfucker. Jesus Christ.

118
00:05:39,600 --> 00:05:40,965
I've been sitting here
on goddamn pins and needles.

119
00:05:41,040 --> 00:05:42,371
What'd you think? You love it?

120
00:05:42,440 --> 00:05:45,523
Uh, it was good. It was...

121
00:05:45,600 --> 00:05:49,082
- I like the stage directions.
- KENNY: Hmm?

122
00:05:49,200 --> 00:05:51,248
The stage directions?

123
00:05:51,320 --> 00:05:54,403
It's always very clear
who was talking to each other.

124
00:05:54,480 --> 00:05:56,369
Dude, what about the story, dude?
Did it connect for you?

125
00:05:56,440 --> 00:05:58,363
Kenny, it's all voiceover.

126
00:05:58,440 --> 00:06:00,363
Show, don't tell. That's the golden rule.

127
00:06:00,440 --> 00:06:03,205
Jesus Christ. Dude, I think that
gunshot wound gave you Down syndrome.

128
00:06:03,280 --> 00:06:05,681
You need to work on your communication
skills with auteurs, okay?

129
00:06:05,800 --> 00:06:08,565
The ending,
it could have been so much stronger.

130
00:06:08,680 --> 00:06:11,524
God damn. You injure your fucking jaw
and suddenly you're Roger Ebert.

131
00:06:11,640 --> 00:06:14,291
I'm more Gene Siskel. Ra-ra-ra.

132
00:06:14,360 --> 00:06:18,126
I'll let this pass, brother, because you are
a little loopy from the pain medicine.

133
00:06:18,200 --> 00:06:19,929
Hey, you want some Vicodin?

134
00:06:20,000 --> 00:06:21,650
Yeah, sure. I'll take one.

135
00:06:21,720 --> 00:06:24,200
Kenny Jr., bring Daddy them pills.

136
00:06:25,320 --> 00:06:27,084
(MUSIC PLAYING ON STEREO)

137
00:06:35,360 --> 00:06:36,600
(KNOCKING)

138
00:06:36,680 --> 00:06:37,920
Guy?

139
00:06:38,640 --> 00:06:40,563
GUY: Thank you so much.

140
00:06:40,640 --> 00:06:42,688
- Guy?
- GUY: I love you.

141
00:06:42,760 --> 00:06:45,411
GUY: Guy Young loves you.
KENNY: Guy?

142
00:06:45,480 --> 00:06:46,766
- GUY: Thank you.
- (CHEERING)

143
00:06:46,840 --> 00:06:49,411
Thank you. (LAUGHS)

144
00:06:49,480 --> 00:06:51,767
Welcome back to another session of the Sesh.

145
00:06:51,840 --> 00:06:54,411
I'm Guy Young, and man,
we got a great show.

146
00:06:54,480 --> 00:06:57,086
Thank you.

147
00:06:57,160 --> 00:06:58,844
KENNY: Geyser.

148
00:06:59,960 --> 00:07:01,086
What's up, Old Faithful?

149
00:07:01,160 --> 00:07:03,686
- What's going on here?
- Well...

150
00:07:03,760 --> 00:07:06,445
If it isn't the great TV star, Kenny Powers.

151
00:07:06,520 --> 00:07:08,602
I come in peace, Guy. I bring good news.

152
00:07:08,680 --> 00:07:09,681
Oh, yeah?

153
00:07:09,760 --> 00:07:14,607
Well, unless that good news is you have
testicular cancer, I don't give a rat's ass.

154
00:07:14,680 --> 00:07:17,331
I don't have cancer in my balls, Guy.

155
00:07:17,400 --> 00:07:19,880
But I do have a brand new television show.

156
00:07:20,000 --> 00:07:21,126
Oh, God damn it.

157
00:07:21,200 --> 00:07:22,804
- What are you trying to do to me, Kenny, huh?
- (MUTES TV)

158
00:07:22,920 --> 00:07:24,445
You just trying to twist the knife in my back?

159
00:07:24,520 --> 00:07:27,524
I never wanted you to end up this way, Guy.

160
00:07:27,600 --> 00:07:30,331
This competition got the best of both of us.

161
00:07:30,400 --> 00:07:32,721
And I want to take
responsibility for my actions.

162
00:07:32,800 --> 00:07:34,404
No.

163
00:07:34,480 --> 00:07:36,289
It's not that easy.

164
00:07:36,360 --> 00:07:38,169
I've lost everything. I lost my show.

165
00:07:38,240 --> 00:07:42,006
I lost my food chains. I lost my AIDS charity.

166
00:07:42,080 --> 00:07:45,129
Nobody wants me anymore.

167
00:07:45,200 --> 00:07:47,567
I don't think I can help you
get AIDS back, Guy.

168
00:07:48,280 --> 00:07:50,282
But I can offer you a chance at redemption.

169
00:07:50,360 --> 00:07:52,442
I'd like to grant to you an interview

170
00:07:52,520 --> 00:07:56,844
as the very first guest
on the first episode of my brand new show.

171
00:07:56,920 --> 00:07:59,207
You can apologize to the masses.

172
00:07:59,280 --> 00:08:03,729
You can begin the difficult task
of rebuilding your brand.

173
00:08:03,800 --> 00:08:05,290
No.

174
00:08:05,360 --> 00:08:07,203
I shit on your kind gesture.

175
00:08:09,320 --> 00:08:10,321
(UNMUTES TV)

176
00:08:10,400 --> 00:08:12,164
Guy, you can't quit.

177
00:08:12,240 --> 00:08:14,766
You don't belong in here, man.
You belong out there.

178
00:08:14,840 --> 00:08:17,081
You're a natural born celebrity.

179
00:08:18,080 --> 00:08:19,081
(MUTES TV)

180
00:08:19,800 --> 00:08:21,325
Why are you doing this, Kenny?

181
00:08:21,400 --> 00:08:26,327
Because once upon a time,
a dear friend did the same exact thing for me.

182
00:08:26,440 --> 00:08:29,364
Gave me a shot when
the rest of the world had counted me out.

183
00:08:29,440 --> 00:08:32,683
Seems only fair to return the favor.

184
00:08:32,760 --> 00:08:34,762
Okay, that was very cool, what you just said.

185
00:08:34,840 --> 00:08:38,322
I mean, I wasn't as down as you are now
when you found me.

186
00:08:38,400 --> 00:08:41,210
You were pretty fucking down.

187
00:08:41,280 --> 00:08:45,251
I wasn't bleeding from my shins nor did
I have my own urine in Gatorade bottles.

188
00:08:47,080 --> 00:08:49,765
So I think you're doing
worse than I was doing.

189
00:08:50,120 --> 00:08:52,361
Oh, no. Johnny Appleseed is dying.

190
00:08:52,440 --> 00:08:54,886
He was loved by all, even the animals.

191
00:08:58,200 --> 00:09:01,204
Johnny Appleseed's dream
was to plant enough seeds

192
00:09:01,280 --> 00:09:04,204
so no one would ever
have to be hungry again.

193
00:09:04,280 --> 00:09:06,248
Kids got chops. It's not too bad.

194
00:09:06,320 --> 00:09:09,608
He'll always be remembered
for what great things he did.

195
00:09:14,280 --> 00:09:17,329
Yeah. Yeah, boy.

196
00:09:17,400 --> 00:09:19,482
My son is the main star of the play.

197
00:09:19,560 --> 00:09:22,131
His part is more important
than all the other children.

198
00:09:22,200 --> 00:09:23,201
(APPLAUSE)

199
00:09:23,440 --> 00:09:24,646
MAN: Good work!

200
00:09:25,480 --> 00:09:27,767
KENNY: Look at our little guy there, huh?
APRIL: I know.

201
00:09:27,840 --> 00:09:30,127
- The tiniest pothead.
- (BOTH LAUGH)

202
00:09:30,200 --> 00:09:32,123
I gotta say,
this feels pretty goddamn good, huh?

203
00:09:32,200 --> 00:09:34,089
- Mmm-hmm.
- What do you say?

204
00:09:34,160 --> 00:09:37,004
Should we take the kids out for
a little celebratory pizza party?

205
00:09:37,080 --> 00:09:39,242
Our family finally reunited again.

206
00:09:39,320 --> 00:09:43,291
It sounds so nice, but, um, I can't.

207
00:09:43,360 --> 00:09:46,330
Are you on a diet or something?
We can go get milkshakes if you want to.

208
00:09:46,400 --> 00:09:47,890
No, I can't.

209
00:09:49,160 --> 00:09:51,447
Thinking about this a lot.

210
00:09:51,520 --> 00:09:53,807
And, um, I gotta be honest with you.

211
00:09:53,880 --> 00:09:55,769
I'm scared you're gonna break my heart again.

212
00:09:56,280 --> 00:09:59,011
I love you so much,

213
00:09:59,680 --> 00:10:01,205
but we can't be together.

214
00:10:03,440 --> 00:10:06,489
I'm moving to Santa Fe.

215
00:10:06,560 --> 00:10:09,609
Santa Fe? What the fuck?
I mean, that's pretty far away.

216
00:10:09,680 --> 00:10:12,843
I know, but I got a new job.

217
00:10:12,920 --> 00:10:16,606
I'm gonna be the new branch manager.

218
00:10:16,720 --> 00:10:19,326
Are you okay?

219
00:10:19,400 --> 00:10:20,811
- You're breathing really heavy...
- Yeah, no. I know.

220
00:10:20,880 --> 00:10:23,486
I'm just practicing relaxation exercises.

221
00:10:25,240 --> 00:10:28,050
You know you can come visit anytime.

222
00:10:30,080 --> 00:10:31,969
You are so welcome to.

223
00:10:36,080 --> 00:10:39,971
KENNY: In the end, Kenny Powers didn't get
what he wanted, but he got what he needed.

224
00:10:53,840 --> 00:10:54,841
(SIGHS)

225
00:11:02,920 --> 00:11:04,206
KENNY: Here we are.

226
00:11:04,280 --> 00:11:06,328
The pinnacle of success.

227
00:11:06,400 --> 00:11:07,970
Our journey ends here, Stevie.

228
00:11:08,040 --> 00:11:09,690
At the top.

229
00:11:09,760 --> 00:11:11,330
I couldn't have done it without you.

230
00:11:11,440 --> 00:11:13,886
I'm feeling good as hell about this, dog.

231
00:11:13,960 --> 00:11:16,645
I feel like Lil Wayne with this sizzurp.

232
00:11:16,720 --> 00:11:18,006
It's crazy.

233
00:11:18,080 --> 00:11:19,923
I always thought
this moment would be joyous.

234
00:11:20,000 --> 00:11:22,731
But instead of wonder, I only feel isolation.

235
00:11:22,800 --> 00:11:26,202
That's the pre-show jitters, dog.
Them the butterflies.

236
00:11:26,280 --> 00:11:27,930
You got this, Kenny.

237
00:11:29,320 --> 00:11:30,446
(SIGHS)

238
00:11:32,640 --> 00:11:35,041
RONNIE: That's the sickest bastard
in television.

239
00:11:35,120 --> 00:11:36,485
What's up with this kung fu?

240
00:11:36,560 --> 00:11:37,925
Just preparation, dog.

241
00:11:38,000 --> 00:11:40,367
Listen, I wanna go over
what you're gonna say today, all right?

242
00:11:40,440 --> 00:11:42,283
I thought that I could just
say whatever I wanted to.

243
00:11:42,360 --> 00:11:43,691
- Just riff. Speak from the heart.
- Yeah.

244
00:11:43,760 --> 00:11:44,886
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, I'm just gonna tell you

245
00:11:44,960 --> 00:11:47,042
- what your heart is telling you to say.
- Okay.

246
00:11:47,120 --> 00:11:51,569
When you get out and you see Guy Young,
I want you to crush him, right?

247
00:11:51,640 --> 00:11:53,722
I want you to break him
like he's a teenage hymen.

248
00:11:53,800 --> 00:11:55,723
That's not what we talked about,
I didn't think it was that kind of show.

249
00:11:55,800 --> 00:11:57,643
I thought this was a feel-good thing,
like, therapeutic, dude.

250
00:11:57,720 --> 00:11:59,051
- Like Ellen.
- No, no, no. It's nothing like Ellen.

251
00:11:59,120 --> 00:12:01,566
Ellen's a lesbian.
The idea of the show is humiliation.

252
00:12:01,640 --> 00:12:04,689
This is like reality TV.
You wanna be a star, right?

253
00:12:04,760 --> 00:12:07,809
- Sure.
- Indulge me, for one moment. Please, Kenny.

254
00:12:07,880 --> 00:12:09,723
- Yeah, sure.
- Thank you, Kenny. All right.

255
00:12:09,800 --> 00:12:12,087
Jerome. Jerome, come over here.

256
00:12:12,160 --> 00:12:14,731
Jerome, you see that man
in the blue shirt there?

257
00:12:14,800 --> 00:12:15,801
- Yeah.
- Yeah? The fat one.

258
00:12:16,440 --> 00:12:20,286
I want you to go over there, get your fingers,
and I want you to ram 'em up his asshole.

259
00:12:20,360 --> 00:12:23,011
You wanna learn about television, yeah?
Go and do that.

260
00:12:23,080 --> 00:12:25,560
Go on.

261
00:12:25,680 --> 00:12:27,170
Look at this, Kenny.

262
00:12:31,800 --> 00:12:34,451
- Hey!
- Hey, hey, hey. Don't shove him.

263
00:12:34,520 --> 00:12:35,806
Bully.

264
00:12:36,800 --> 00:12:37,801
(LAUGHTER)

265
00:12:39,120 --> 00:12:40,201
This is how you do it.

266
00:12:42,520 --> 00:12:43,567
Well?

267
00:12:43,640 --> 00:12:47,167
You see? They love me
because I humiliated the fat man.

268
00:12:47,240 --> 00:12:49,163
It's gonna be the same
with the audience today.

269
00:12:49,240 --> 00:12:52,483
That fat man tonight is Guy Young.

270
00:12:52,560 --> 00:12:54,403
I want you to look in that mirror now.

271
00:12:57,360 --> 00:12:58,725
I want you to say, "I'm a bad man."

272
00:12:58,840 --> 00:13:02,890
- Just to say it into the mirror?
- Yeah.

273
00:13:02,960 --> 00:13:05,042
I'm a bad man.

274
00:13:05,120 --> 00:13:07,282
Say, "I'm a very bad man."

275
00:13:07,360 --> 00:13:08,850
I'm a very bad man.

276
00:13:08,920 --> 00:13:10,809
You're a bad man.

277
00:13:10,880 --> 00:13:12,291
RONNIE: You are, Kenny.

278
00:13:12,920 --> 00:13:17,642
You see, once the audience see who you are,
they will love you.

279
00:13:17,720 --> 00:13:20,200
You go out there and you kill Guy Young.

280
00:13:20,320 --> 00:13:22,482
You kill him. All right?

281
00:13:22,560 --> 00:13:24,005
Got it.

282
00:13:24,080 --> 00:13:26,890
Let's go. Come on.
We had fun. Are you having fun?

283
00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:29,241
(SIGHS) Stevie, what do you think about that?

284
00:13:29,680 --> 00:13:30,966
(MUMBLES)

285
00:13:31,960 --> 00:13:33,405
Champion.

286
00:13:34,360 --> 00:13:35,850
Thank you so much for doing this.

287
00:13:35,960 --> 00:13:38,691
You're a good friend and an even better man.

288
00:13:38,760 --> 00:13:40,444
No problem, Guy.

289
00:13:40,520 --> 00:13:41,931
I love you.

290
00:13:42,000 --> 00:13:43,968
(MURMURING) I love you, too.

291
00:13:44,040 --> 00:13:45,883
I'll see you out there, buddy.

292
00:13:47,480 --> 00:13:48,481
(SIGHS)

293
00:13:48,960 --> 00:13:52,328
DIXIE: So, April, Santa Fe,
how exciting is that?

294
00:13:52,400 --> 00:13:54,687
Just put your broken marriage behind you.

295
00:13:54,760 --> 00:13:57,843
- You know. Just do one of these.
- In time.

296
00:13:57,920 --> 00:14:00,764
- (CHATTERING ON TV)
- You know, you should try online dating.

297
00:14:00,840 --> 00:14:02,410
Dixie, I'm not ready to date.

298
00:14:02,480 --> 00:14:04,289
- Are you sure?
- Positive.

299
00:14:04,360 --> 00:14:06,169
Not getting any younger.

300
00:14:06,280 --> 00:14:07,850
You're just getting older.

301
00:14:07,920 --> 00:14:10,605
Gene, please turn off the TV. Okay?

302
00:14:10,680 --> 00:14:12,808
You can go one day
without watching television.

303
00:14:12,880 --> 00:14:14,848
No TV, how am I supposed to drown you out?

304
00:14:14,920 --> 00:14:16,968
- I'm sorry. What's that, honey?
- Huh?

305
00:14:17,800 --> 00:14:21,122
ANNOUNCER: And now it's time
for the Powers Hour.

306
00:14:21,200 --> 00:14:22,486
(THEME PLAYING)

307
00:14:32,760 --> 00:14:34,569
Hello and how are you, America?

308
00:14:34,640 --> 00:14:36,449
Welcome to Powers Hour.

309
00:14:36,560 --> 00:14:40,451
I'm your host, Kenneth Powers,
and I'm here today to give you straight talk.

310
00:14:41,160 --> 00:14:42,366
Oh, oh. It's starting.

311
00:14:42,440 --> 00:14:44,920
Powers Hour will be unlike
any other show on daytime talk

312
00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:47,685
because we're gonna give it to you real
and we're gonna give it to you hard.

313
00:14:48,320 --> 00:14:50,448
Guys, we have coasters for a reason.

314
00:14:50,520 --> 00:14:52,204
KENNY: That's right,
you'll be getting it real hard.

315
00:14:52,280 --> 00:14:53,327
- Turn it off, Gene.
- KENNY: Charlotte.

316
00:14:53,400 --> 00:14:55,129
Come on, Dixie. We're watching this.

317
00:14:55,200 --> 00:14:58,409
No, we're not watching this
'cause I said to turn it off.

318
00:14:58,480 --> 00:15:00,369
Okay? We wanna socialize.

319
00:15:00,440 --> 00:15:03,569
Gene. One. Two.

320
00:15:04,480 --> 00:15:07,245
- Two and a half.
- You know what? You want the remote?

321
00:15:07,320 --> 00:15:09,607
You want it?
I'm gonna stick it up my ass, all right?

322
00:15:09,720 --> 00:15:12,166
And then you can come up there
and dig it out yourself.

323
00:15:12,240 --> 00:15:14,208
Well, guess what, genius, look.

324
00:15:14,280 --> 00:15:16,044
Now you're not watching Kenny, okay?

325
00:15:16,120 --> 00:15:18,885
Yeah, well, I'll just turn it on by
squeezing my fucking ass cheeks.

326
00:15:18,960 --> 00:15:20,883
Now piss off, Dixie!

327
00:15:20,960 --> 00:15:23,042
God damn it!

328
00:15:23,120 --> 00:15:26,249
DIXIE: We'll talk later.
GENE: (MOCKING) "We'll talk later."

329
00:15:26,360 --> 00:15:29,523
You will anyway,
and I'll just zone out and act like I give a shit.

330
00:15:29,600 --> 00:15:31,921
Now sit down. Idiot.

331
00:15:35,480 --> 00:15:38,165
Now today's show
is all about second chances.

332
00:15:38,240 --> 00:15:42,290
Later on in the episode, we have the results of
some exciting paternity tests

333
00:15:42,360 --> 00:15:45,125
which are gonna give some young men
a second chance at responsibility.

334
00:15:45,200 --> 00:15:46,611
This is gonna be a big hit.

335
00:15:46,680 --> 00:15:50,002
Now, folks,
I'd like to introduce a very special guest.

336
00:15:50,080 --> 00:15:53,527
Now this man, at one point,
was loved and admired by all.

337
00:15:53,640 --> 00:15:56,484
- But now he's universally hated.
- (CHUCKLES)

338
00:15:56,600 --> 00:16:00,286
Ladies and gentleman, please put
your hands together for Guy Young.

339
00:16:00,360 --> 00:16:02,567
(TUNE PLAYS)
(JEERING)

340
00:16:03,880 --> 00:16:04,927
Eat a dick.

341
00:16:13,320 --> 00:16:16,324
How does it feel
to hear people booing you like that?

342
00:16:16,400 --> 00:16:17,811
It's hard.

343
00:16:17,880 --> 00:16:20,929
These people look at you
and they think very negative of you.

344
00:16:21,040 --> 00:16:22,087
Yeah.

345
00:16:22,160 --> 00:16:23,650
- They don't like you.
- Yeah, I get that.

346
00:16:23,720 --> 00:16:26,087
- Because of the things you said.
- Yes.

347
00:16:26,160 --> 00:16:28,845
That's why you're here today,
you want to apologize for what you said.

348
00:16:28,920 --> 00:16:30,843
Thank goodness your show exists, because...

349
00:16:30,920 --> 00:16:32,081
Well, Guy, guess what?

350
00:16:32,160 --> 00:16:33,321
That's not gonna happen.

351
00:16:34,440 --> 00:16:36,920
You just walked into an ambush, old friend.

352
00:16:37,040 --> 00:16:38,804
- Boom.
- (CHEERING)

353
00:16:39,400 --> 00:16:41,846
Because people here don't give a shit
about second chances, no.

354
00:16:41,920 --> 00:16:45,606
What they'd rather see,
you humiliated on national television.

355
00:16:46,520 --> 00:16:47,885
(CHEERING LOUDLY)

356
00:17:01,600 --> 00:17:03,045
But that's not what I want.

357
00:17:06,680 --> 00:17:09,126
- And I say fuck what these people want.
- What?

358
00:17:09,680 --> 00:17:12,001
I made a lot of mistakes
on my return to superstardom.

359
00:17:12,080 --> 00:17:13,081
Kenny...

360
00:17:13,160 --> 00:17:15,766
I screwed a lot of pooches.
I fucked a lot of folks.

361
00:17:16,960 --> 00:17:20,965
- I labored for far too long for lesser men.
- (SCOFFS)

362
00:17:21,280 --> 00:17:25,080
I used my God-given abilities
to destroy men's lives.

363
00:17:27,280 --> 00:17:28,770
I betrayed good people.

364
00:17:28,840 --> 00:17:32,208
I ruthlessly stepped upon
the weak and the strong.

365
00:17:32,320 --> 00:17:35,369
I turned them into my slaves.

366
00:17:35,440 --> 00:17:36,441
Come on.

367
00:17:36,520 --> 00:17:40,650
Even the fiercest of warriors is nothing to me.

368
00:17:40,720 --> 00:17:42,404
Powerless.

369
00:17:42,480 --> 00:17:44,801
I was absolutely terrible
to everybody in my fucking life.

370
00:17:44,880 --> 00:17:49,010
Including everyone I worked with,
everyone I lived with, my friends, my family.

371
00:17:49,080 --> 00:17:51,560
I was horrendous.

372
00:17:51,640 --> 00:17:54,041
And why did I do
these (BLEEP) things, you ask?

373
00:17:55,040 --> 00:17:56,849
Well, it's simple, really.

374
00:17:56,920 --> 00:18:01,608
I thought that fame, fortune and success
was the only way I would ever be happy.

375
00:18:01,680 --> 00:18:04,160
And I've paid a steep price
for this train of thinking.

376
00:18:05,880 --> 00:18:10,920
I've lost the only woman I ever loved
and the only woman who ever loved me.

377
00:18:13,680 --> 00:18:15,762
So from this moment forward,

378
00:18:15,840 --> 00:18:21,244
the vicious dragon that was Kenny Powers
will retreat back to his cave.

379
00:18:21,320 --> 00:18:23,926
Back to hibernation.

380
00:18:24,040 --> 00:18:28,090
Until the next foolish knight
awakens his wrath.

381
00:18:29,760 --> 00:18:33,526
- GUY: When do I get to make my apology?
- Hmm?

382
00:18:33,600 --> 00:18:35,523
Do... Do I get to make my apology now?

383
00:18:39,080 --> 00:18:40,286
Yep.

384
00:18:40,360 --> 00:18:41,361
It's all yours, buddy.

385
00:18:42,680 --> 00:18:43,681
(FEEDBACK)

386
00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:46,809
Fucking duck's clit!

387
00:18:51,160 --> 00:18:54,801
First off, let me say, I love black people.

388
00:18:54,880 --> 00:18:57,042
Grab all the personal effects, Stevie.

389
00:18:57,120 --> 00:18:58,929
All the personal accoutrements, please.

390
00:18:59,000 --> 00:19:00,604
Shane, go there.

391
00:19:00,680 --> 00:19:04,082
Kenny Powers, I'm fucking annoyed with you,
you pair of hedgehog tits!

392
00:19:04,160 --> 00:19:07,607
You upset a little kid
who's very, very sick with herpes.

393
00:19:07,680 --> 00:19:12,368
He was expecting to see some
American badass, not some nancy boy.

394
00:19:14,320 --> 00:19:16,846
- How's that for a badass?
- Oh!

395
00:19:16,920 --> 00:19:19,446
WorldStar! WorldStar!

396
00:19:20,840 --> 00:19:22,126
Fuck you!

397
00:19:38,160 --> 00:19:40,128
- Hey, little dudes.
- Hey, Daddy.

398
00:19:40,240 --> 00:19:42,561
- Hey, Daddy.
- Look who's mastered the beast, huh?

399
00:19:42,640 --> 00:19:43,641
(CHUCKLES)

400
00:19:43,960 --> 00:19:45,962
Looks like you guys
are gonna be moving out west.

401
00:19:46,080 --> 00:19:49,368
Those kids from the rez,
they're not gonna like you.

402
00:19:49,440 --> 00:19:51,841
Many moons ago,
the white man stole their land,

403
00:19:51,960 --> 00:19:53,724
so they're instantly
gonna have a hatred for you.

404
00:19:53,800 --> 00:19:57,361
As long as you keep Dakota by your side
and never show 'em an ounce of fear,

405
00:19:57,440 --> 00:19:59,329
one day, you can gain their respect.

406
00:19:59,400 --> 00:20:01,084
- Okay, Daddy.
- Okay, Daddy.

407
00:20:01,160 --> 00:20:04,687
I hope to get out to see you there sometime,
you guys.

408
00:20:04,760 --> 00:20:07,331
You know, Southwest Airlines
has a hub in Albuquerque.

409
00:20:08,320 --> 00:20:10,209
There's no first class on that airline,
obviously,

410
00:20:10,280 --> 00:20:13,523
but they do have that business select option.

411
00:20:13,600 --> 00:20:17,366
You get the coupons for the premium drinks

412
00:20:17,440 --> 00:20:20,649
and the priority access,
be the first on the plane.

413
00:20:20,720 --> 00:20:24,930
Even offer the double
rapid reward points for your miles there.

414
00:20:27,480 --> 00:20:32,168
Hopefully, I'll stack up a bunch of those from
all the times I'll come out there and visit.

415
00:20:35,560 --> 00:20:37,164
I'm gonna miss you guys.

416
00:20:37,240 --> 00:20:39,049
I'm gonna miss you, too.

417
00:20:40,120 --> 00:20:42,043
Bring it in here.

418
00:20:43,040 --> 00:20:44,246
Love you guys.

419
00:20:44,320 --> 00:20:45,526
Love you, too.

420
00:21:06,840 --> 00:21:07,841
Oh.

421
00:21:08,600 --> 00:21:09,931
- Hey.
- Hey.

422
00:21:10,000 --> 00:21:15,131
Surprised to see you're taking so much of
that traditional modern shit we had.

423
00:21:15,200 --> 00:21:18,807
Seems like it might kind of clash with
the Spanish style they rock there in Santa Fe.

424
00:21:19,120 --> 00:21:20,121
Mmm.

425
00:21:20,200 --> 00:21:24,205
Might wanna think about getting
some Navajo rugs or some ristras.

426
00:21:24,280 --> 00:21:28,285
Kokopellis, the little
skinny dudes with the trumpets.

427
00:21:28,360 --> 00:21:31,489
I guess we'll see once we get there.

428
00:21:31,600 --> 00:21:33,125
Yeah.

429
00:21:33,200 --> 00:21:36,329
This is it. The papers are signed.

430
00:21:36,440 --> 00:21:39,967
You and I are officially divorced.

431
00:21:40,040 --> 00:21:41,530
APRIL: Thank you.

432
00:21:44,280 --> 00:21:45,645
What are you gonna do now?

433
00:21:45,720 --> 00:21:47,324
I don't know.

434
00:21:47,400 --> 00:21:49,846
Stevie and I have been
cooking up a few things.

435
00:21:49,920 --> 00:21:51,809
Now that I'm done with
the television industry,

436
00:21:51,880 --> 00:21:54,724
it might be high time
to finally step into the feature film world.

437
00:21:54,800 --> 00:21:55,801
Mmm.

438
00:21:55,880 --> 00:21:58,121
At least with movies,
it's not all about the money.

439
00:21:59,160 --> 00:22:03,131
Well, I know you will succeed
at anything you try.

440
00:22:04,240 --> 00:22:05,890
Yeah, well...

441
00:22:05,960 --> 00:22:07,564
We'll see.

442
00:22:09,120 --> 00:22:10,360
Goodbye, April.

443
00:22:12,440 --> 00:22:13,930
Goodbye, Kenny.

444
00:22:16,600 --> 00:22:17,726
You know, April,

445
00:22:19,120 --> 00:22:23,011
when I told you that I was unhappy
with you and the kids,

446
00:22:23,080 --> 00:22:25,481
that wasn't true.

447
00:22:25,560 --> 00:22:27,050
I was never unhappy with you guys.

448
00:22:28,600 --> 00:22:30,841
I was unhappy with myself.

449
00:22:30,920 --> 00:22:33,526
I just wanted to be a success.

450
00:22:33,600 --> 00:22:37,400
It turns out I was a success
the whole entire time.

451
00:22:37,480 --> 00:22:40,768
As a father, a husband.

452
00:22:42,600 --> 00:22:44,728
A pretty goddamn good one at that.

453
00:22:47,760 --> 00:22:49,489
I just thought you should know.

454
00:22:51,120 --> 00:22:53,248
- Kenny, stop.
- No, April, it's fine.

455
00:22:53,320 --> 00:22:55,402
Oh, just stop.

456
00:23:06,560 --> 00:23:09,962
KENNY: If you ask me, the secret to success
is to have a diverse portfolio.

457
00:23:11,800 --> 00:23:14,485
Too much of any one thing
is fucking no bueno.

458
00:23:16,280 --> 00:23:17,691
Of course, sometimes, balancing can be hard.

459
00:23:17,760 --> 00:23:18,761
(INAUDIBLE)

460
00:23:18,840 --> 00:23:21,411
But all things worth having
are worth fighting for.

461
00:23:21,480 --> 00:23:23,482
Kids, I can throw the ball faster than fuck,

462
00:23:23,560 --> 00:23:26,166
and now I'm the most popular
teacher in this school.

463
00:23:26,240 --> 00:23:27,810
Cutler, you're fucking up.

464
00:23:27,880 --> 00:23:29,769
Big cans, bring me them titties.

465
00:23:29,840 --> 00:23:31,763
My life is ruined.

466
00:23:33,280 --> 00:23:36,124
KENNY: Sometimes hard work pays off.

467
00:23:36,200 --> 00:23:37,804
Yay, Kenny!

468
00:23:37,880 --> 00:23:38,927
KENNY: And cut!

469
00:23:39,000 --> 00:23:41,002
- Pretty powerful.
- Perfect.

470
00:23:41,080 --> 00:23:43,208
Check the fucking gate.

471
00:23:43,280 --> 00:23:46,124
- That's you, son. You did it.
- That's me, Daddy.

472
00:23:46,200 --> 00:23:47,770
I did it. I love you so much.

473
00:23:47,840 --> 00:23:49,490
You're great, too, yeah.

474
00:23:49,560 --> 00:23:51,801
- KENNY: If a man doesn't have a dream,
- (CLICKS)

475
00:23:52,360 --> 00:23:55,648
well, guess what, his soul begins to die.

476
00:23:55,720 --> 00:23:57,882
So after you've accomplished your dreams,

477
00:23:57,960 --> 00:24:00,440
the best thing to do
is to come up with new dreams.

478
00:24:03,560 --> 00:24:07,451
That way, as the years roll on, as they will do,

479
00:24:08,640 --> 00:24:10,927
you'll always look to the future with hope.

480
00:24:14,720 --> 00:24:17,929
But of course, the future's sure to hold
its fair share of miseries.

481
00:24:30,280 --> 00:24:31,486
(ROCK SONG PLAYING)

482
00:24:31,560 --> 00:24:33,085
No.

483
00:24:46,280 --> 00:24:48,760
All kinds of shitty sorrows.

484
00:25:18,840 --> 00:25:22,925
I find solace in the fact that from each sorrow
comes a little bit of knowledge.

485
00:25:24,320 --> 00:25:25,924
(AFRICAN MUSIC PLAYING)

486
00:25:39,320 --> 00:25:41,641
And with knowledge comes wisdom.

487
00:25:44,800 --> 00:25:46,484
(CLICKING NOISES)

488
00:25:49,120 --> 00:25:50,531
(CLAMORING)

489
00:26:01,800 --> 00:26:03,643
(MAN SINGING IN LOCAL LANGUAGE)

490
00:26:12,160 --> 00:26:16,245
- If you're lucky, you get a second act in life.
- (SPEAKS LOCAL LANGUAGE)

491
00:26:16,400 --> 00:26:17,401
(CHEERING)

492
00:26:17,760 --> 00:26:19,330
(TRIUMPHANT MUSIC PLAYING)

493
00:26:30,840 --> 00:26:34,162
CHILDREN: Come on, Daddy.

494
00:26:46,720 --> 00:26:49,963
KENNY: But sooner or later, death will come.

495
00:26:50,040 --> 00:26:54,204
Unannounced, old man Reaper
comes to reclaim your soul.

496
00:27:02,040 --> 00:27:05,886
All you can hope for is that the people you
love will cherish the time they spent with you.

497
00:27:09,360 --> 00:27:12,762
In the end, you judge a man
by how he influenced the world.

498
00:27:14,560 --> 00:27:16,847
You judge him by the seeds he left behind.

499
00:27:24,000 --> 00:27:26,731
And you judge the seeds by the harvest.

500
00:27:46,240 --> 00:27:51,531
But Kenny Powers' harvest remains unknown,
but I'm pretty goddamn proud of my seeds.

501
00:27:57,960 --> 00:27:59,962
The end.

502
00:28:00,040 --> 00:28:01,530
Cut to black.

503
00:28:01,600 --> 00:28:03,602
Audience goes fucking ape shit.

504
00:28:08,080 --> 00:28:09,411
(SIGHS)

505
00:28:14,040 --> 00:28:15,883
It's perfect.

506
00:28:19,960 --> 00:28:21,530
- Are you done yet?
- Hmm?

507
00:28:22,120 --> 00:28:24,043
You have been in here for hours.

508
00:28:25,800 --> 00:28:27,325
Yep.

509
00:28:27,400 --> 00:28:28,447
I'm finished.

510
00:28:34,720 --> 00:28:36,449
(MUST OF GOT LOST PLAYING)