1 00:00:37,360 --> 00:00:40,388 Hello, Alexander. It's Stuart. 2 00:00:41,055 --> 00:00:41,695 Hello, Stuart. 3 00:00:42,355 --> 00:00:48,634 You know, admitting I've had lots to drink and that, but I can't help reflect— 4 00:00:48,635 --> 00:00:51,105 I'm Alexander, the bloke in the glasses driving, 5 00:00:51,395 --> 00:00:53,755 not the mumbly one on the tape. That's Stuart. 6 00:00:56,905 --> 00:01:01,555 I got to know Stuart in 2000 and decided to write his biography. 7 00:01:02,655 --> 00:01:05,354 All my friends said it was mad. I mean, after all this man was unknown, 8 00:01:05,355 --> 00:01:08,565 he wasn't famous, not a celebrity, but the book turned out okay. 9 00:01:11,690 --> 00:01:14,455 Just wish Stuart could have been here to see it. 10 00:01:23,555 --> 00:01:26,605 I think it was the first ever biography of a homeless man. 11 00:01:27,155 --> 00:01:28,545 From birth to the present day. 12 00:02:33,155 --> 00:02:37,205 So, back in 2000 I was earning a bit of extra pocket money 13 00:02:37,255 --> 00:02:39,455 working as a fundraiser at Wintercomfort, 14 00:02:40,955 --> 00:02:45,655 which is a busy little day shelter in Cambridge, normally full of homeless people. 15 00:02:47,155 --> 00:02:51,455 Full, that is, until the morning that the police decided to raid the place. 16 00:02:51,555 --> 00:02:52,555 They've been arrested. 17 00:02:52,985 --> 00:02:54,855 All of them? 18 00:02:55,205 --> 00:02:56,355 What a good idea. 19 00:03:00,355 --> 00:03:03,455 Uh, no, no. It was, um, just my boss, Ruth, 20 00:03:03,505 --> 00:03:05,455 and um, her deputy, John. 21 00:03:06,075 --> 00:03:09,155 Some of the clients have been secretly dealing drugs on the premises 22 00:03:09,157 --> 00:03:12,030 but because Ruth and John ran the charity, they were held responsible. 23 00:03:12,755 --> 00:03:15,505 They've got evidence, on film. 24 00:03:16,955 --> 00:03:19,455 I was furious at the injustice of it. 25 00:03:21,955 --> 00:03:24,255 And, uh, then really, for the first time in my life 26 00:03:24,256 --> 00:03:27,155 I actually began to take a real and practical interest in the homeless. 27 00:03:27,355 --> 00:03:29,655 Fuck off, pisshead! 28 00:03:32,355 --> 00:03:35,055 I'd like to introduce to you Alexander Masters, 29 00:03:35,165 --> 00:03:38,675 a dedicated friend of the homeless himself, chairman of the campaign. 30 00:03:42,655 --> 00:03:44,655 Oh, we were convinced they'd never be convicted. 31 00:03:44,755 --> 00:03:49,055 I mean, if prisons can't control drugs then how could Ruth and John be expected to? 32 00:03:49,275 --> 00:03:53,154 As everyone knows, we're here this evening about Ruth Wyner and John— 33 00:03:53,155 --> 00:03:58,355 The judge, Justice Howarth, sent them down— —for five years, and four years. 34 00:03:58,665 --> 00:04:00,155 - Shame. - Thank you. 35 00:04:00,185 --> 00:04:02,455 - Fascist. - Thank you. 36 00:04:02,955 --> 00:04:05,605 But this is the crunch, what are we going to do about it? 37 00:04:06,955 --> 00:04:09,555 How is this campaign going to get Ruth and John out? 38 00:04:10,875 --> 00:04:11,955 - Yes? - We could send them books. 39 00:04:12,025 --> 00:04:14,155 Bunyan, he's good for prisons. 40 00:04:14,355 --> 00:04:17,635 Hardly. Miracle of the Rose, by Genet, if you must. 41 00:04:17,660 --> 00:04:21,955 Excuse me, this isn't gonna work. 42 00:04:22,755 --> 00:04:28,555 Sending them books, eh? It won't fit in the box. 43 00:04:29,655 --> 00:04:32,555 - Sorry? - The inmate's belongings. 44 00:04:35,955 --> 00:04:37,855 Everyone's got one. 45 00:04:38,145 --> 00:04:43,655 - Who is that? - No idea. They all look the same to me. 46 00:04:43,855 --> 00:04:48,105 —you're also allowed a piece of carpet what won't fit in your box, 47 00:04:49,355 --> 00:04:53,855 and a budgie or, or a canary, 48 00:04:54,555 --> 00:04:58,140 and obviously the cage is not going to fit in the box. 49 00:04:58,505 --> 00:05:02,955 But, it is Ruth and John what will suffer. 50 00:05:09,655 --> 00:05:16,655 All of them books, the screws will just chuck them out because they won't fit in your box. 51 00:05:17,455 --> 00:05:23,355 I'm not being funny, but you should really know about boxes if you're gonna have a campaign. 52 00:05:30,255 --> 00:05:34,755 Me name's Psycho, but you can call me Stuart, if you like. 53 00:05:35,155 --> 00:05:41,905 - Um, what's your address? - Umm... 2 Laurel Lane. 54 00:05:44,455 --> 00:05:53,405 Yeah, they help me: doctors, a couple clothes, outreach, sometimes lunch with two puddings. 55 00:05:53,755 --> 00:05:59,305 Yeah, they put it all on, those two. And the staff. 56 00:06:00,155 --> 00:06:05,555 I'm not being funny, yeah, but I am really grateful. 57 00:06:08,165 --> 00:06:11,655 - The other day I got a really [indiscernible]. - Oh, great. 58 00:06:15,155 --> 00:06:17,165 - Can I help? - Yeah, uh, yeah. 59 00:06:17,255 --> 00:06:19,655 That's how I first met Stuart Shorter. 60 00:06:20,155 --> 00:06:25,635 Street brawler, alcoholic, a heroin addict, sociopathic street raconteur with a fondness 61 00:06:25,636 --> 00:06:31,105 for what he called "little strips of silver". Knives, to you and me. 62 00:06:45,055 --> 00:06:49,405 - Thank you very much for agreeing to store these. - Oh, no problem. 63 00:06:57,055 --> 00:07:01,855 Mind the step. Oh, dear. Here you go, mate. 64 00:07:02,855 --> 00:07:07,005 Welcome to my humble abode. 65 00:07:07,155 --> 00:07:13,355 2 Laurel Lane. Well, they are laurels, aren't they? 66 00:07:16,155 --> 00:07:20,655 I only heard about the meeting this morning when I was picking up my breakfast. 67 00:07:24,155 --> 00:07:26,055 - Your address? - Mm-hm. 68 00:07:26,155 --> 00:07:32,355 A bad idea, number one, mate. You could get any old riff-raff showing up. Oh, dear, dear. 69 00:07:42,125 --> 00:07:43,455 Yes? 70 00:07:46,155 --> 00:07:46,955 It's you. 71 00:07:48,855 --> 00:07:51,055 I've addressed some envelopes. 72 00:07:56,605 --> 00:07:58,655 - Which, uh... - They alright? 73 00:08:00,455 --> 00:08:01,555 Horrible. 74 00:08:01,905 --> 00:08:07,705 I've had a blinding idea for the campaign. Yeah, get us on television and all. 75 00:08:08,145 --> 00:08:13,005 Not even violent, if we leave out the kidnapping. 76 00:08:19,155 --> 00:08:21,655 - Do you want to come in? - Oh, yes please. 77 00:08:21,805 --> 00:08:22,955 It's a bit wet out there. 78 00:08:24,255 --> 00:08:26,355 Ooh, that's nice. 79 00:08:43,655 --> 00:08:47,355 - How many sugars? - As many as you got, mate. 80 00:09:24,255 --> 00:09:25,755 H—hot. 81 00:09:30,955 --> 00:09:32,355 All them books. 82 00:09:35,355 --> 00:09:37,655 Have you read all of them? 83 00:09:37,905 --> 00:09:38,655 No. 84 00:09:39,055 --> 00:09:40,055 Half? 85 00:09:41,655 --> 00:09:43,155 Not exactly. 86 00:09:45,145 --> 00:09:48,655 The Hunting Wasp. 87 00:09:49,055 --> 00:09:52,355 A whole book about them little summer things. 88 00:09:57,155 --> 00:10:01,755 This one. What is this one about? 89 00:10:03,455 --> 00:10:04,655 The colour mauve. 90 00:10:10,365 --> 00:10:13,405 How do you fucking get away with this? 91 00:10:22,455 --> 00:10:26,655 Now, this blinding idea. 92 00:10:27,215 --> 00:10:28,855 Have you got a car? 93 00:10:30,155 --> 00:10:30,955 No. 94 00:10:31,155 --> 00:10:37,555 What do you like better: Volvo or VW? 95 00:10:41,455 --> 00:10:47,755 And then a few weeks later I had the idea about the book and started doing a little research. 96 00:10:48,355 --> 00:10:52,555 That boy has suffered. He deserves a book. 97 00:10:54,555 --> 00:10:56,455 You should write a book about me. 98 00:10:57,255 --> 00:10:59,255 Always such a caring boy. 99 00:10:59,855 --> 00:11:01,255 Happy-go-lucky little thing. 100 00:11:02,455 --> 00:11:05,155 Legs all over the show, bless him. 101 00:11:05,955 --> 00:11:08,654 Three months after that we carried out Stuart's blinding idea 102 00:11:08,655 --> 00:11:12,154 which was a sleep-over protest in front of the home office 103 00:11:12,155 --> 00:11:16,355 to persuade the then Home Secretary, Jack Straw, to release Ruth and John. 104 00:11:16,995 --> 00:11:19,755 Which was better than his first idea, which was to kidnap him. 105 00:11:21,155 --> 00:11:25,455 Stuart took care of our transport. Somehow. 106 00:11:26,155 --> 00:11:30,615 And on the way to London I read him the first few pages of my book idea. 107 00:11:31,055 --> 00:11:36,855 "Stuart Clive Shorter was a happy-go-lucky little boy, 'the most considerate of my children', marvels his mother." 108 00:11:37,145 --> 00:11:39,655 Bollocks! Boring! 109 00:11:40,145 --> 00:11:42,355 Why do you want to write this fucking book anyway? 110 00:11:43,155 --> 00:11:45,205 To make lots and lots and lots of money. 111 00:11:45,355 --> 00:11:48,605 Seriously? You think you can make money out of it? 112 00:11:49,155 --> 00:11:50,255 Could, maybe. 113 00:11:50,355 --> 00:11:52,055 Something as boring as that? 114 00:11:52,145 --> 00:11:54,705 Don't be so rude. Anyway, it's not my fault that you started out so dull. 115 00:11:57,155 --> 00:11:59,255 You got make it more exciting. 116 00:12:01,265 --> 00:12:07,055 Do it backwards. Like a murder mystery. Like a best-seller. 117 00:12:07,155 --> 00:12:10,145 You know, like what Tom Clancy writes. 118 00:12:10,155 --> 00:12:12,955 Yeah! How'd I get to be like this? 119 00:12:13,055 --> 00:12:15,505 What murdered the little boy I was? 120 00:12:17,145 --> 00:12:19,255 Make them nine-to-five sit up. 121 00:12:27,155 --> 00:12:32,905 I mean, you put ten socks in the washing machine and only seven come out. 122 00:12:33,155 --> 00:12:34,655 Where do they go? 123 00:12:35,155 --> 00:12:36,905 - Stuart? - I'll tell you another thing and all— 124 00:12:36,955 --> 00:12:39,145 - Stuart? — You take the machine apart and it ain't in it neither. 125 00:12:39,155 --> 00:12:40,145 - Stuart? - What? 126 00:12:40,155 --> 00:12:43,145 - What's this? - What? - This. 127 00:12:44,255 --> 00:12:48,255 That, Alexander, is a lice. 128 00:12:53,655 --> 00:12:57,505 The main place you get those is around your bollocks. 129 00:12:59,055 --> 00:13:02,555 That lice, that'll grow. 130 00:13:03,155 --> 00:13:12,155 Scabies are smaller and they go under the skin and live there, literally nibbling. 131 00:13:15,145 --> 00:13:20,155 It took five and a half hours for our convoy to do the 50 miles from Cambridge to London. 132 00:13:20,655 --> 00:13:23,155 Stuart would never drive above 30 miles an hour. 133 00:13:25,455 --> 00:13:27,955 Hey, Buckingham Palace. 134 00:13:29,255 --> 00:13:32,955 What a load of bollocks! Huh! 135 00:13:34,395 --> 00:13:36,005 Who needs a queen? 136 00:13:45,755 --> 00:13:49,455 - Oh, no, no, no, no. No, not like that. - What? 137 00:13:49,655 --> 00:13:53,755 Use this, right? Underneath, yeah? Here you are. 138 00:13:53,905 --> 00:13:57,955 You lose more heat that way than you do that way. 139 00:13:58,155 --> 00:14:02,245 Ruth and John need these: eyes on the back of their heads! 140 00:14:02,255 --> 00:14:04,055 End [indiscernible] police state now! 141 00:14:06,555 --> 00:14:08,655 People are being wrongfully imprisoned for working in a charity 142 00:14:08,656 --> 00:14:10,085 and doing nothing but trying to help the homeless. 143 00:14:12,655 --> 00:14:16,005 Charity workers in prison because of a miscarriage of— oh, fuck off. 144 00:14:30,405 --> 00:14:34,630 Charity workers in prison because of a miscarriage of justice. 145 00:14:34,637 --> 00:14:35,655 Okay, listen up, everyone! 146 00:14:36,355 --> 00:14:39,955 Okay, everyone! Listen up! Everyone, please. Quiet, please! 147 00:14:40,205 --> 00:14:42,655 Everyone, we need you to move this way, thank you. 148 00:14:42,905 --> 00:14:45,055 Wait a minute, hold on, hold on. Why? This is a peaceful protest. 149 00:14:45,255 --> 00:14:46,154 Yeah! Fucking why? 150 00:14:46,255 --> 00:14:49,154 You can't cross these brass flags if the Home Office doesn't want you to. 151 00:14:49,155 --> 00:14:50,154 That's social fucking fascism, that is! 152 00:14:50,155 --> 00:14:53,355 And then we must put a fence in behind you to ensure you're not trespassing 153 00:14:53,455 --> 00:14:57,855 and ones on either side to protect you. - What? 154 00:14:58,055 --> 00:15:03,145 From the public, sir. They might step on you. And a fence in front just in case 155 00:15:03,146 --> 00:15:05,510 during the night you roll onto the road and get run over. 156 00:15:05,530 --> 00:15:07,755 Oh, I see. So you mean to cage us in completely. 157 00:15:08,175 --> 00:15:11,535 I didn't say cage, sir, no. That was your word. 158 00:15:17,155 --> 00:15:18,955 Do prisoners really get wages? 159 00:15:21,155 --> 00:15:22,755 Yeah. 160 00:15:23,155 --> 00:15:24,955 You mean a lot like normal people? 161 00:15:25,155 --> 00:15:27,655 Yeah, make a fucking fortune. 162 00:15:28,155 --> 00:15:31,405 Millionaires coming out of the nick every week. 163 00:15:39,955 --> 00:15:41,955 You've been in a lot of prisons then? 164 00:15:42,145 --> 00:15:44,955 Have I? Fucking hell. 165 00:15:45,555 --> 00:15:47,055 How many? 166 00:15:47,455 --> 00:15:49,855 Well, um... 167 00:15:56,855 --> 00:16:02,455 Well, start off, when I was a nipper there was Send Detention Centre, 168 00:16:04,955 --> 00:16:07,505 Baintnow House, back to Send again, 169 00:16:09,255 --> 00:16:12,155 Eriestoke, Norwich, 170 00:16:13,255 --> 00:16:16,955 then I grew up and went to big boy prison. 171 00:16:19,905 --> 00:16:24,455 Whitemoor. Aw, now that's what I call a real prison. 172 00:16:24,475 --> 00:16:26,255 You got everything there, mate: 173 00:16:26,305 --> 00:16:37,055 terrorists, psychopaths, security threats, murderers, manslaughters, crazies... 174 00:16:37,145 --> 00:16:38,455 Which lot do you belong to? 175 00:16:42,055 --> 00:16:45,355 Crazies, really. Mm, yeah. 176 00:16:45,655 --> 00:16:49,455 Norwich, Whitemoor again. 177 00:16:51,055 --> 00:16:54,555 Grendon Underground. 178 00:16:56,155 --> 00:16:57,855 Thirty-one. 179 00:17:00,655 --> 00:17:02,855 I don't think I've missed any. 180 00:17:07,055 --> 00:17:10,355 Oh yes, I have actually! I've been to Leicester three times as well. 181 00:17:13,155 --> 00:17:15,255 Wayland was me last one. 182 00:17:21,755 --> 00:17:23,255 Good night. Sleep well. 183 00:17:23,355 --> 00:17:26,505 Thank you. Same to you. 184 00:17:26,905 --> 00:17:32,205 Oi, you. Since you got so much fucking time on your hands, yeah, 185 00:17:32,206 --> 00:17:37,905 answer this one: do you know how many people 186 00:17:37,906 --> 00:17:43,055 get killed by screws in prison every year? Murders. 187 00:17:43,155 --> 00:17:48,355 Oh, sorry, Gov. Excuse us, how was we supposed to know that bending him in half 188 00:17:48,356 --> 00:17:52,155 the wrong fucking way was bad for his health? 189 00:17:52,160 --> 00:17:57,145 It was only people like me what is really rotten, isn't it? Really bad. 190 00:17:57,155 --> 00:18:02,355 Beyond hope. You haven't got the faintest fucking clue, have you? Huh? 191 00:18:02,755 --> 00:18:06,905 - Yeah, all he said was "Good night". - You can fuck off and all you fucking geeky— 192 00:18:06,906 --> 00:18:14,355 - Oh, shut up yourself, Stuart. - You fucking wanking middle class cunt fuck, Alexander. 193 00:18:14,365 --> 00:18:20,655 You want to know how I became what I am? I'm giving you fucking answers! 194 00:18:22,155 --> 00:18:26,985 Why don't you write a book with no fucking answers, eh? 195 00:18:30,805 --> 00:18:35,155 Go on, you fuck off. You find your fucking answers. 196 00:18:50,805 --> 00:18:57,055 On a scale of anger, one to ten, I'm probably on four and Stuart's on eleven. 197 00:18:57,205 --> 00:18:59,755 You never can tell... 198 00:19:00,105 --> 00:19:03,505 how families have been down and they've been up then they've been down again. 199 00:19:03,506 --> 00:19:06,855 You just like Stuart, you know? 200 00:19:07,455 --> 00:19:10,755 Drugs, prison, being a beggar. 201 00:19:13,145 --> 00:19:13,855 Go on, go on. 202 00:19:23,505 --> 00:19:24,505 Yeah, mate. 203 00:19:25,055 --> 00:19:26,755 - Bastards! - Morning. 204 00:19:29,255 --> 00:19:30,405 Like the taste of piss, eh? 205 00:19:32,155 --> 00:19:33,955 You bastards. 206 00:19:34,165 --> 00:19:35,955 Someone smells nice. 207 00:19:37,455 --> 00:19:39,905 After three months of preparation. 208 00:19:42,005 --> 00:19:44,650 I mean, who's bloody stupid idea was it that we camp out over the weekend anyway, 209 00:19:44,655 --> 00:19:47,855 the one time Mr. Straw's not going to be there? 210 00:19:48,055 --> 00:19:49,830 - I bet it was yours. - Oh, fuck off. 211 00:19:57,905 --> 00:20:00,205 - Oh, I like this song. - This is a good song. 212 00:20:22,105 --> 00:20:24,555 Still, one blimey thing did come out of that weekend: 213 00:20:25,605 --> 00:20:28,355 Stuart's idea that his life should be written backwards. 214 00:20:39,105 --> 00:20:42,455 It was cutting me throat what done it. 215 00:20:43,155 --> 00:20:47,525 Put a beer glass into me neck. Just lost it. 216 00:20:55,105 --> 00:20:59,725 Sometimes you wouldn't believe how hard it is to fucking die. 217 00:21:01,155 --> 00:21:04,405 So, you got a council for that, because you tried to kill yourself? 218 00:21:05,155 --> 00:21:08,055 Works a trick for the old housing points, doesn't it? 219 00:21:08,105 --> 00:21:11,005 Whoosh! Straight to the top of the list. 220 00:21:13,155 --> 00:21:15,105 It's not all gone though. 221 00:21:15,115 --> 00:21:16,655 What's not all gone? 222 00:21:18,155 --> 00:21:20,155 The hatred. 223 00:21:20,855 --> 00:21:25,355 I got so many enemies. Up here, mate. 224 00:21:26,655 --> 00:21:29,405 Somebody's going to get hurt though, that's what scares me. 225 00:21:30,155 --> 00:21:31,855 When's this thing going to happen? 226 00:21:34,155 --> 00:21:36,455 I call it me "black mists". 227 00:21:37,155 --> 00:21:41,955 Next week? Next month? Next ten seconds? 228 00:22:08,555 --> 00:22:11,905 That is lovely bit of workmanship. 229 00:22:21,455 --> 00:22:24,705 That's value. That's value. 230 00:22:27,155 --> 00:22:32,355 Oh my God. This for the series. 231 00:22:47,155 --> 00:22:49,105 For my son. 232 00:22:51,455 --> 00:22:52,855 You've got a son!? 233 00:22:53,155 --> 00:22:57,655 Yeah. In Glasgow with his mum. 234 00:22:59,155 --> 00:23:01,655 Fourteen years of age to mind. 235 00:23:02,655 --> 00:23:05,355 Always out on the golf course, the little 'un. 236 00:23:12,755 --> 00:23:16,655 Not bad there, mate. Not better than Laurel Lane. 237 00:23:30,405 --> 00:23:33,675 Wine always smells like sick. 238 00:23:34,155 --> 00:23:36,305 Here, have a beer. 239 00:23:41,605 --> 00:23:43,165 Fancy something to eat? 240 00:24:15,805 --> 00:24:18,155 So why do you want to be a writer, then? 241 00:24:18,405 --> 00:24:22,705 Oh, I don't know, really. Bit like a disease, all my family's got it. 242 00:24:23,455 --> 00:24:25,255 Didn't want to be left out, did I? 243 00:24:25,555 --> 00:24:27,605 Nah. I know what you mean, mate. 244 00:24:28,255 --> 00:24:30,225 Me dad is a thief, 245 00:24:30,355 --> 00:24:32,655 and, um, me mum's a barmaid. 246 00:24:35,055 --> 00:24:37,505 What's the colour orange highlighter in your diary for? 247 00:24:38,155 --> 00:24:39,855 Family stuff. 248 00:24:42,975 --> 00:24:44,000 Yellow? 249 00:24:44,005 --> 00:24:45,305 Social. 250 00:24:52,005 --> 00:24:58,405 Now, uh, this book that you're writing about me, 251 00:25:00,155 --> 00:25:01,855 is it just to make your name? 252 00:25:02,955 --> 00:25:04,655 And yours. 253 00:25:07,955 --> 00:25:13,155 I've, uh, had an idea for a job, too. 254 00:25:15,155 --> 00:25:20,155 For the foreign businessman what doesn't have time to waste, 255 00:25:21,655 --> 00:25:23,155 what does he need? 256 00:25:25,155 --> 00:25:29,655 An office... in a van. 257 00:25:33,155 --> 00:25:34,675 It's lateral thinking, isn't it? 258 00:25:36,105 --> 00:25:40,135 Gets off the plane at Stansted, straight into the back of me van. 259 00:25:41,655 --> 00:25:43,305 That will have everything: 260 00:25:44,655 --> 00:25:47,605 good-looking bird what can do shorthand, 261 00:25:47,905 --> 00:25:55,405 fax, internet, wires all over the fucking gaff. It's brilliant. 262 00:25:56,175 --> 00:25:58,605 Red sauce or brown? 263 00:25:58,825 --> 00:26:01,305 Oh, yes please. I mean, uh, red. 264 00:26:01,355 --> 00:26:05,355 - What—What's— - Oh yeah, that fella upstairs 265 00:26:05,755 --> 00:26:12,355 is gonna make me a bed what folds up against the wall, like what James Bond has. 266 00:26:12,575 --> 00:26:16,114 - Ooh. - Yeah. It's got to have, um, 267 00:26:16,115 --> 00:26:21,980 springs and latches on the floor otherwise it's boing, boing, whoosh! 268 00:26:22,255 --> 00:26:24,155 Boing, boing, whoosh? 269 00:26:24,705 --> 00:26:30,105 You know what I mean, bird's not going to be too happy if she gets her face 270 00:26:30,106 --> 00:26:33,505 squeezed up against the plaster, is she? 271 00:26:35,155 --> 00:26:36,555 Hey. 272 00:26:40,905 --> 00:26:41,855 Sorry. 273 00:26:43,455 --> 00:26:48,155 Good stuff, that. You can use it with anything. 274 00:26:48,655 --> 00:26:57,655 See that right by the bed? This should be a huge stain where I overdosed there last week. 275 00:26:57,656 --> 00:27:05,155 And all the spilled cans and vomit. That cleaned it up really, really well, actually. 276 00:27:06,555 --> 00:27:15,405 But you want to, um, you want to leave it, uh, for about... about a week before you vacuum. 277 00:27:43,055 --> 00:27:44,155 Here you are, mate. 278 00:27:48,155 --> 00:27:50,670 Careful, yeah? It's a bit hot. 279 00:28:03,625 --> 00:28:06,305 I never asked you why you were in prison. 280 00:28:07,155 --> 00:28:11,905 The last time— Stupid things. 281 00:28:12,755 --> 00:28:17,655 Me mate, Smithy, well bubblegum chap, 282 00:28:17,955 --> 00:28:21,255 I'm not being funny, he's in the Guinness Book of Records. 283 00:28:23,155 --> 00:28:26,305 1983 edition, as it goes. 284 00:28:27,255 --> 00:28:30,355 Like brothers fighting the world. 285 00:28:31,755 --> 00:28:35,355 Respect, trust, and honour. 286 00:28:43,055 --> 00:28:44,255 Go, go, go, go, go! 287 00:28:46,205 --> 00:28:46,755 Right. 288 00:28:54,305 --> 00:28:55,405 Ow. 289 00:29:05,155 --> 00:29:10,055 - Oh, fuck. Did you get menthols? - Menthols? Fuck off. 290 00:29:10,155 --> 00:29:14,105 - She'll fucking kill me. She asked for menthols. - Well, give her the vodka. 291 00:29:14,115 --> 00:29:16,550 She don't want vodka, she wants menthols! 292 00:29:27,305 --> 00:29:29,055 Go, go, go, go, go! 293 00:29:29,155 --> 00:29:33,055 Aw, I don't believe it! These aren't fucking menthols either! 294 00:29:33,105 --> 00:29:36,525 They're just in a green packet. I've got ten packets of green cigarettes. 295 00:29:40,570 --> 00:29:42,155 Hurry up. 296 00:29:42,655 --> 00:29:44,155 25 quid, 60!? 297 00:29:45,555 --> 00:29:49,825 Women! They think they can boss you about in everything, don't they? 298 00:29:49,985 --> 00:29:55,155 And one day, Smithy got a tip-off. 299 00:29:59,255 --> 00:30:02,405 - 20,000 quid? - Just keeps it under the counter. 300 00:30:02,475 --> 00:30:04,255 Not a cop shop in 20 miles. 301 00:30:05,155 --> 00:30:09,455 Fucking— That's fucking irresponsible. 302 00:30:10,155 --> 00:30:12,055 No pride of ownership. 303 00:30:18,005 --> 00:30:19,155 Go, go, go, go, go! 304 00:30:23,655 --> 00:30:24,655 Right. 305 00:30:34,455 --> 00:30:40,105 Let's just say it was funny because as soon as we was sent down, 306 00:30:40,110 --> 00:30:43,755 Smithy's missus moved in with the fella what told us about the job. 307 00:30:45,155 --> 00:30:46,555 Five years. 308 00:30:49,155 --> 00:30:53,155 Pretty steep sentence. Were you armed? 309 00:30:53,156 --> 00:30:54,655 No. 310 00:31:00,705 --> 00:31:02,280 Only with a crowbar. 311 00:31:14,655 --> 00:31:18,405 Hey, Alexander? You wanna stay for tea? 312 00:31:19,155 --> 00:31:22,305 Me favourite, "convict curry". 313 00:31:22,755 --> 00:31:25,105 We used to make it in jail. 314 00:31:26,155 --> 00:31:28,155 Ooh, mushrooms! 315 00:31:41,175 --> 00:31:43,705 - What about the first time, then? - First time what? 316 00:31:44,855 --> 00:31:47,155 Well, that you were sentenced as an adult. 317 00:31:58,155 --> 00:32:04,655 I can't— I can't really talk about that, mate. 318 00:32:09,155 --> 00:32:13,455 But, I mean, robbing an empty post office is— 319 00:32:13,456 --> 00:32:21,355 Burgle. Rob people, burgle post offices. 320 00:32:21,525 --> 00:32:25,655 Yeah, but what I mean is it's hardly a Schedule 1 offence, is it? 321 00:32:25,905 --> 00:32:27,155 Of course not. 322 00:32:29,905 --> 00:32:31,655 Well, that's serious, isn't it? 323 00:32:45,205 --> 00:32:47,455 It wasn't kiddie fiddling. 324 00:32:54,505 --> 00:32:57,205 I didn't say that it was. 325 00:33:00,005 --> 00:33:01,505 It wasn't. 326 00:33:07,205 --> 00:33:09,405 We'll talk about it Thursday, yeah? 327 00:33:12,455 --> 00:33:14,455 Thursday afternoon. 328 00:33:19,905 --> 00:33:21,855 Another time, right? 329 00:34:14,155 --> 00:34:19,155 Then you mop with the bread. Mop up your juices. 330 00:34:32,005 --> 00:34:35,705 So, smash the window, break the steering wheel lock 331 00:34:35,706 --> 00:34:38,405 by turning the wheel in opposing directions. 332 00:34:38,755 --> 00:34:43,555 Yeah. And if the street is too public to use a brick... 333 00:34:43,605 --> 00:34:48,155 Slide stick. Remove the metal band from a pallet of bricks, reduce to eighteen inches, 334 00:34:48,156 --> 00:34:51,605 remove a notch from one side, insert into door panel. 335 00:34:52,895 --> 00:34:55,405 Ba-kow! I'm in the post office! Boot in the rubble! 336 00:34:55,455 --> 00:34:58,655 No, there's no point in ram-raiding a post office. 337 00:34:58,855 --> 00:35:01,405 - Why not? - Can't you not pay attention? 338 00:35:01,455 --> 00:35:06,865 There's no point in ram-raiding a fucking post office. There's never no money in the till, is there? 339 00:35:10,755 --> 00:35:12,055 Gone are them days. 340 00:35:13,155 --> 00:35:15,355 I forgot money. 341 00:35:18,780 --> 00:35:20,005 Here. 342 00:35:21,755 --> 00:35:25,355 No, no, no, no. I'll get a taxi, I'll stop at a bank on the way. 343 00:35:25,475 --> 00:35:28,315 No, honestly, take it. It's me beer money. 344 00:35:28,335 --> 00:35:31,045 You'll be doing me a favour. 345 00:35:31,155 --> 00:35:33,405 You'll be doing society a favour. 346 00:35:35,955 --> 00:35:38,580 And buy a fucking car. 347 00:35:38,695 --> 00:35:40,905 Get yourself a fucking license. 348 00:35:42,355 --> 00:35:43,655 Oh, I almost forgot. 349 00:35:44,155 --> 00:35:46,405 Here. Bought you this. 350 00:35:47,455 --> 00:35:49,355 Your black mists. 351 00:35:50,955 --> 00:35:53,255 Thought you could talk into it next time you're in one. 352 00:35:54,675 --> 00:35:56,155 You'll be okay? 353 00:35:57,055 --> 00:35:58,255 Call if you need any help. 354 00:35:59,455 --> 00:36:01,605 2am, 4am, anytime. 355 00:36:01,705 --> 00:36:05,355 Yeah, so you can bring a fucking camera? 356 00:36:08,755 --> 00:36:09,455 Oi! 357 00:36:14,555 --> 00:36:16,665 You're alright, Alexander. 358 00:36:35,355 --> 00:36:40,554 Often used to say to Stuart, "I wish I could just pick you up sometimes, 359 00:36:40,555 --> 00:36:45,015 turn you upside down and shake all the bad things out of your head, 360 00:36:45,055 --> 00:36:47,555 then put you back up the right way again." 361 00:36:49,230 --> 00:36:50,855 The change in him. 362 00:36:51,155 --> 00:36:52,855 We just couldn't understand it. 363 00:36:55,955 --> 00:36:58,465 And of course I would like to thank you all for coming here today 364 00:36:58,495 --> 00:37:02,205 to hear me talk about the campaign and the petition. 365 00:37:02,455 --> 00:37:07,105 Stuart and I gave nine or ten talks together about the campaign that spring 366 00:37:07,130 --> 00:37:11,055 in Burmingham, London, Oxford, and of course villages around Cambridge. 367 00:37:11,155 --> 00:37:12,155 Mr Stuart Clive Shorter. 368 00:37:12,305 --> 00:37:16,704 I'd speak first, and then Stuart would get up and knock the audience off its 369 00:37:16,705 --> 00:37:18,255 seats with the story of his life. 370 00:37:18,405 --> 00:37:27,055 A typical suicide attempt, just an unbearable sense of hatred, waste— 371 00:37:27,085 --> 00:37:30,155 "I am the nightmare you frighten your children with", he said. 372 00:37:30,165 --> 00:37:33,755 "The sort of person these two charity workers were trying to help to get off your streets." 373 00:37:34,355 --> 00:37:38,405 "We should have awarded Ruth and John medals instead of sending them to prison." 374 00:37:38,410 --> 00:37:45,255 —so I just twisted around and I emptied everything that remained into my right buttock. 375 00:37:45,260 --> 00:37:47,155 Stuart did two things for the campaign, really. 376 00:37:47,255 --> 00:37:49,855 He folded letters 377 00:37:50,155 --> 00:37:51,955 and he exposed his soul. 378 00:37:58,055 --> 00:37:59,155 That alright? 379 00:38:06,855 --> 00:38:09,155 - Exactly. So, if we write— - Oh, this is your name. 380 00:38:09,655 --> 00:38:11,655 If we solve the puzzle, do we solve you? 381 00:38:13,505 --> 00:38:16,655 He's just... He's just very, very interesting, you know? 382 00:38:16,656 --> 00:38:18,105 He tells me about a world I knew nothing about 383 00:38:18,120 --> 00:38:21,655 and... I... I just like him. 384 00:38:22,155 --> 00:38:28,155 It's absolutely extraordinary. He knows the exact day that he changed into a sociopath. 385 00:38:28,156 --> 00:38:30,155 Between 4pm and 5pm. The exact day! 386 00:38:30,955 --> 00:38:35,455 It's like knowing what was in Dr Jekyll's potion that turned him into Mr Hyde. 387 00:38:39,855 --> 00:38:43,355 This thing, Stuart's black mist, came that night. 388 00:38:44,655 --> 00:38:46,655 Apparently it started by a knife fight. 389 00:38:48,555 --> 00:38:51,205 The first I heard about it was a call a day later from his mother. 390 00:39:03,955 --> 00:39:05,155 At least there's no blood. 391 00:39:06,155 --> 00:39:07,805 Usually there is blood. 392 00:39:10,255 --> 00:39:11,955 Perhaps the cleaners have been 'round. 393 00:39:13,655 --> 00:39:14,805 Just for the blood. 394 00:39:25,155 --> 00:39:26,755 Campaign's helped him a lot, you know. 395 00:39:27,655 --> 00:39:28,905 Kept him straight. 396 00:39:29,525 --> 00:39:32,405 Ain't been this happy since he was a little boy. 397 00:39:41,555 --> 00:39:43,205 "Alexander only." 398 00:39:49,265 --> 00:39:57,455 Hello, Alexander. It's Stuart. You know, admitting I've had lots to drink and that, but 399 00:39:57,456 --> 00:40:00,155 I can't help reflect about— 400 00:40:02,995 --> 00:40:05,595 Stuart had been bailed to appear at Cambridge Magistrate's Court. 401 00:40:08,855 --> 00:40:10,855 I went with him for moral support. 402 00:40:26,655 --> 00:40:28,955 They don't look too upset to be here. 403 00:40:30,055 --> 00:40:33,255 Well, wait till they get to Crown Court, that's when it gets serious. 404 00:40:33,305 --> 00:40:35,355 Godspeed the day. 405 00:40:44,665 --> 00:40:46,155 Excuse me, you're about to fall off— 406 00:40:46,156 --> 00:40:47,055 Fuck off. 407 00:40:47,965 --> 00:40:50,154 Good lad, just say that to the nasty man with the wig and 408 00:40:50,155 --> 00:40:51,465 everything will be fine. 409 00:40:53,155 --> 00:40:58,655 Sometimes it takes so long you forget what your fucking crime was. 410 00:41:00,255 --> 00:41:04,655 Here, listen to this. It's the little 'un. 411 00:41:07,055 --> 00:41:11,505 If I don't know you, fuck off! I'm not in and I don't wanna talk to you! 412 00:41:13,555 --> 00:41:15,855 I didn't think it was like that. 413 00:41:17,155 --> 00:41:20,155 I was thinking maybe he should go to business school. 414 00:41:21,055 --> 00:41:22,955 But now I don't know. 415 00:41:23,955 --> 00:41:25,055 He ain't right. 416 00:41:26,155 --> 00:41:30,455 I've had to have words with him about the importance of politeness. 417 00:41:30,705 --> 00:41:31,855 He's fourteen. 418 00:41:32,145 --> 00:41:34,455 It really shocked me, to be honest. 419 00:41:36,755 --> 00:41:38,055 Mr Shorter? 420 00:41:39,255 --> 00:41:44,355 According to police statements they could smell smoking oil when they arrived on the scene. 421 00:41:45,175 --> 00:41:46,355 Chip fat. 422 00:41:54,655 --> 00:41:57,155 It was the anniversary of my brother's death. 423 00:42:00,955 --> 00:42:03,475 I wanted to burn the devil out of myself. 424 00:42:38,455 --> 00:42:42,159 The Magistrate's Court decided they couldn't handle the complexities of Stuart's case 425 00:42:42,160 --> 00:42:44,655 so they referred it to the Crown Court. 426 00:42:45,955 --> 00:42:48,605 Disgrace. Forty policemen and you still get bailed? 427 00:42:48,655 --> 00:42:50,485 Beats me why you hate the system. 428 00:42:52,955 --> 00:42:55,465 Well, my mum says she doesn't understand it neither. 429 00:42:58,455 --> 00:43:02,805 What did the barrister mean when he was talking about "attempted manslaughter"? 430 00:43:05,155 --> 00:43:08,755 I reckon I tried to cut my neighbour's head off with a bread knife. 431 00:43:09,405 --> 00:43:11,015 You didn't. Did you? 432 00:43:13,155 --> 00:43:14,855 Yeah. 433 00:43:18,555 --> 00:43:20,905 And if he hadn't have moved, I'd have got him too. 434 00:43:28,655 --> 00:43:32,155 So you called your neighbour who made your boing-boing-whoosh bed 435 00:43:32,156 --> 00:43:35,455 a poofter and then that's why he lost it? 436 00:43:36,155 --> 00:43:38,515 No, he thought that I called him a poofter. 437 00:43:38,520 --> 00:43:41,055 - And you did nothing of the sort? - No. 438 00:43:41,255 --> 00:43:43,055 Then what did you do? 439 00:43:43,155 --> 00:43:46,355 I just asked his friend if he was a poofter. 440 00:43:48,855 --> 00:43:51,055 It's not a joke, Alexander! 441 00:43:51,155 --> 00:43:54,230 - Well, I mean— - When my bell's up, I'm looking at life! 442 00:44:05,655 --> 00:44:07,145 I've lost my keys somewhere. 443 00:44:10,055 --> 00:44:14,255 So you didn't call your neighbour who made your boing-boing-whoosh bed a poofter. 444 00:44:15,955 --> 00:44:20,755 But what— What did his mate say when you called... 445 00:44:21,105 --> 00:44:23,155 What did his mate say when you asked him if he was a poofter? 446 00:44:25,155 --> 00:44:29,925 Just... said he suffered from premature ejaculation. 447 00:44:32,655 --> 00:44:35,655 Which I thought was quite interesting at the time 448 00:44:36,155 --> 00:44:39,955 because I suffer from the same complaint myself. 449 00:44:53,145 --> 00:44:56,455 Um, I'm going to see some friends in Norfolk next week. 450 00:44:56,755 --> 00:44:58,055 Come along. 451 00:44:58,355 --> 00:45:00,055 No, can't. 452 00:45:01,855 --> 00:45:05,805 You heard the Magistrate, I'm not allowed out of Cambridge until me trial. 453 00:45:13,155 --> 00:45:16,355 And another thing about washing machines, right, 454 00:45:16,505 --> 00:45:19,270 this fella on the TV, 455 00:45:19,775 --> 00:45:24,155 he put three of them washing machine inner bits together. 456 00:45:25,155 --> 00:45:27,555 Not even a concrete one. Nothing. 457 00:45:28,155 --> 00:45:31,155 And he said it was a sculpture. 458 00:45:35,305 --> 00:45:37,355 And somebody bought it! 459 00:45:38,355 --> 00:45:40,355 I'm not being funny, yeah? 460 00:45:41,155 --> 00:45:44,355 But there is a viable business opportunity there. 461 00:45:47,455 --> 00:45:49,155 Rent a barn. 462 00:45:50,055 --> 00:45:52,155 Lay out all the bits. 463 00:45:53,155 --> 00:45:56,275 And when you've had enough of washing machines, 464 00:45:57,505 --> 00:45:58,955 do fridges. 465 00:46:00,455 --> 00:46:04,155 You know, that's what really annoys me, Alexander. 466 00:46:04,165 --> 00:46:08,605 I'm always getting these great ideas, you know, about how to make money. 467 00:46:09,605 --> 00:46:12,355 People are always telling me that they're wrong, you know? 468 00:46:12,405 --> 00:46:14,355 I never get no encouragement. 469 00:46:15,605 --> 00:46:17,755 No encouragement at all. 470 00:46:21,855 --> 00:46:23,205 Can you hold the wheel? 471 00:46:26,555 --> 00:46:27,855 You want some? 472 00:46:28,655 --> 00:46:31,055 Uh, yes. Thank you. 473 00:46:31,155 --> 00:46:31,955 Save me some. 474 00:46:32,455 --> 00:46:33,780 I will. 475 00:46:38,145 --> 00:46:40,405 I think I've got a bit of a cold coming. 476 00:46:47,855 --> 00:46:49,855 Here, listen to this! 477 00:46:51,155 --> 00:46:53,305 I apologise for not being currently available. 478 00:46:53,307 --> 00:46:56,155 Be so kind as to leave your name and message. 479 00:46:59,955 --> 00:47:03,455 So, why don't you just get an ordinary job? 480 00:47:05,155 --> 00:47:08,055 - 9 to 5? - That's the one. 481 00:47:08,755 --> 00:47:12,155 Getting up in the morning, coming home late at night. 482 00:47:12,165 --> 00:47:13,145 On the nose. 483 00:47:13,155 --> 00:47:14,455 Full time. 484 00:47:16,855 --> 00:47:18,355 What, have you ever had one of those? 485 00:47:18,755 --> 00:47:20,255 - Nope. - Ohh. 486 00:47:23,055 --> 00:47:25,755 I've done a bit of valeting work for a friend of me brother's. 487 00:47:26,555 --> 00:47:27,955 And? 488 00:47:28,555 --> 00:47:30,255 I head-butted the bloke. 489 00:47:31,055 --> 00:47:33,455 Your version of putting your head down and getting on with it, I suppose. 490 00:47:33,555 --> 00:47:36,145 He tried to fiddle with me sister. 491 00:47:38,065 --> 00:47:41,555 And then later on, you know, ah s— I don't know. 492 00:47:43,155 --> 00:47:45,055 And now you don't know what? 493 00:47:48,155 --> 00:47:49,955 Nothing. Just later on 494 00:47:50,255 --> 00:47:53,155 my brother Gavvy killed himself. 495 00:47:54,855 --> 00:47:56,410 Well, you know don't have to say anything, Stuart. 496 00:47:59,155 --> 00:48:00,805 Talk about it another time. 497 00:48:02,955 --> 00:48:04,755 Yeah. Thanks. 498 00:48:10,855 --> 00:48:13,555 When the police found Gavvy they said he'd really suffered. 499 00:48:14,955 --> 00:48:18,605 The tablets he'd taken had eaten his kidneys and his liver away before he died. 500 00:48:18,920 --> 00:48:21,455 And he had been in absolute agony dying. 501 00:48:22,005 --> 00:48:23,155 And I'm glad. 502 00:48:24,165 --> 00:48:26,455 I'm glad my brother suffered. 503 00:48:33,155 --> 00:48:37,655 - Chainsaw carved mushrooms? - Fucking hell. 504 00:48:38,055 --> 00:48:39,375 What did they do to deserve that? 505 00:48:45,155 --> 00:48:48,655 Fucking nice little number you got going here, mate. 506 00:48:49,355 --> 00:48:51,655 You get many knob heads falling for it? 507 00:48:51,657 --> 00:48:53,555 Yeah, plenty. 508 00:49:22,455 --> 00:49:23,605 Oh wow. 509 00:49:24,780 --> 00:49:25,855 I'm James. Good to see you. 510 00:49:27,155 --> 00:49:28,755 Alexander's told me all about you. 511 00:49:30,155 --> 00:49:31,454 Reuben, yes? 512 00:49:31,455 --> 00:49:33,705 - I'm Dido. - Ah, you have a lovely house. 513 00:49:33,805 --> 00:49:35,455 - Hello, darling. - Hi, hi, hi. 514 00:49:35,630 --> 00:49:37,655 - Good to see you. - This is for you. 515 00:49:37,805 --> 00:49:38,655 Ooh, thank you. Lovely, mmm. 516 00:49:38,710 --> 00:49:41,695 Now, Alexander told you that I'm an alcoholic, hasn't he? 517 00:49:41,735 --> 00:49:46,580 I'm also a Schedule 1 offender and a thief, but I won't cause no trouble. 518 00:49:47,655 --> 00:49:50,155 May I have a tour of the estate, please? 519 00:49:51,055 --> 00:49:54,755 - Is that a pear tree? - Yeah. 520 00:49:56,555 --> 00:49:57,705 You can make cider out of that. 521 00:49:59,055 --> 00:50:00,365 And them apples, eh? 522 00:50:02,145 --> 00:50:05,504 Famous actors used to come here and play tennis, like Lawrence Olivier and— 523 00:50:05,505 --> 00:50:08,005 Lawrence Olivier? Really? Right there? 524 00:50:11,080 --> 00:50:12,855 21-Love! 525 00:50:13,155 --> 00:50:14,905 Hey! 526 00:50:14,955 --> 00:50:18,630 You ought to knock all of them trees down and build a go-kart course. 527 00:50:20,735 --> 00:50:23,530 If you fix this place up it would be really lovely here. 528 00:51:15,155 --> 00:51:18,155 Ooh, [indiscernible]. Very nice. 529 00:51:22,855 --> 00:51:25,555 Ooh, it's very tasty. Yeah. 530 00:51:28,655 --> 00:51:31,255 Fucking amazing here. 531 00:51:35,655 --> 00:51:37,455 Yeah, A-fucking-One. 532 00:51:42,655 --> 00:51:44,855 They're so false. 533 00:51:45,455 --> 00:51:47,255 False tits. 534 00:51:48,355 --> 00:51:52,855 Now, I prefer a bit of natural bounce myself. 535 00:51:54,255 --> 00:51:57,455 I mean, and if they're going to sag, they're going to sag, aren't they? 536 00:52:06,155 --> 00:52:07,905 I don't get it, Alexander. 537 00:52:08,255 --> 00:52:13,305 How come you're so interested in homeless people? 538 00:52:14,230 --> 00:52:17,405 I'm not. I was only working at Wintercomfort because the money was good. 539 00:52:18,055 --> 00:52:22,555 Nine quid an hour. And the hours, shift work. 540 00:52:23,155 --> 00:52:24,405 How long are these onions meant to cook? 541 00:52:27,155 --> 00:52:28,655 Till they feel satisfied. 542 00:52:31,905 --> 00:52:33,515 And then it meant I could write in the morning. 543 00:52:35,405 --> 00:52:37,155 Yeah, but why? 544 00:52:38,145 --> 00:52:41,154 Look, Stuart, if I was interested in you as a homeless person, 545 00:52:41,155 --> 00:52:43,705 I'd have been sacked for unprofessional conduct ages ago. 546 00:52:44,105 --> 00:52:46,705 - So? - So I like you as a friend, is that so bad? 547 00:52:51,655 --> 00:52:52,630 Fenugreek? 548 00:52:56,155 --> 00:52:58,805 It's a bit weird if you ask me. 549 00:52:59,935 --> 00:53:01,145 Couldn't agree more. 550 00:53:04,155 --> 00:53:09,205 —seven, eight. There's always somebody what won't want two. 551 00:53:15,805 --> 00:53:17,155 Yeah, but why? 552 00:53:18,855 --> 00:53:21,355 Because you're funny, intelligent, good company. 553 00:53:21,357 --> 00:53:24,255 What do you want, a fucking love letter? Now shut up and drink your freaking beer. 554 00:53:31,255 --> 00:53:32,355 Marvellous. 555 00:53:32,955 --> 00:53:35,255 - What was it again? - "Convict Curry". 556 00:53:47,055 --> 00:53:49,955 Hey Stuart, it's Thursday! You gotta tell! 557 00:53:50,155 --> 00:53:51,935 No, not now. 558 00:53:52,045 --> 00:53:53,655 Come on. A promise is a promise. 559 00:53:53,775 --> 00:53:56,525 Come on, you've talked to us about everything else. 560 00:53:56,955 --> 00:53:58,705 Give it a rest, Alexander. 561 00:54:01,155 --> 00:54:04,355 - You don't wanna know. - Stuart's first prison sentence. 562 00:54:04,355 --> 00:54:05,180 He'll only talk about it on a Thursday 563 00:54:05,255 --> 00:54:09,154 because he gets his dole money Wednesday afternoons, which means that 564 00:54:09,155 --> 00:54:13,055 if talking about it upsets him, he's still got enough heroin left to calm him down. 565 00:54:13,056 --> 00:54:14,155 Is that right? 566 00:54:18,225 --> 00:54:19,655 It was nothing. 567 00:54:21,155 --> 00:54:22,855 I was— 568 00:54:24,155 --> 00:54:26,155 I was in the pub one night. 569 00:54:27,355 --> 00:54:29,655 It was the little 'un's birthday. 570 00:54:32,955 --> 00:54:35,605 I was, I was in the pub celebrating. 571 00:54:36,755 --> 00:54:39,855 It was over ten years ago. 572 00:54:42,005 --> 00:54:44,155 This bloke says... 573 00:54:45,955 --> 00:54:47,455 It was just nastiness. 574 00:54:47,555 --> 00:54:48,155 Come on. 575 00:54:48,805 --> 00:54:51,155 Alexander, please. 576 00:54:51,655 --> 00:54:53,855 Look, Thursday's the day. 577 00:55:01,155 --> 00:55:03,155 So I come home. 578 00:55:10,855 --> 00:55:14,155 [Indiscernible] says, "you've been fucking [indiscernible]." 579 00:55:14,855 --> 00:55:16,155 You're drunk. 580 00:55:18,555 --> 00:55:20,755 If you want it, you gotta rape me. 581 00:55:27,605 --> 00:55:29,555 I'll fucking kill you, you cunt! 582 00:55:29,755 --> 00:55:31,655 Get out! 583 00:55:32,055 --> 00:55:34,145 You wanted a fucking baby! 584 00:55:38,755 --> 00:55:46,255 And I think then I realised that I had made a proper mess of it all, really. 585 00:55:46,455 --> 00:55:47,655 I'm fucking leaving. 586 00:55:48,955 --> 00:55:50,255 You fucking are now! 587 00:55:52,955 --> 00:55:55,655 Did you fuck around with me!? Yeah!? 588 00:55:59,155 --> 00:56:02,165 I'm a bit ashamed of that to be honest. 589 00:56:10,155 --> 00:56:15,335 Go on, fuck off! Fuck off, [indiscernible]. Oh, for fuck's sake. 590 00:56:15,555 --> 00:56:16,655 Go on, fuck off! 591 00:56:19,655 --> 00:56:20,805 Fucking hell! 592 00:56:21,105 --> 00:56:22,155 It's alright. 593 00:56:22,365 --> 00:56:23,455 Fuck off! 594 00:56:25,355 --> 00:56:28,155 So we sat around for a bit 595 00:56:30,155 --> 00:56:32,455 and decided we'd come out together. 596 00:56:37,455 --> 00:56:41,155 We're coming out now. We're together. 597 00:56:42,855 --> 00:56:44,105 I'm sorry. 598 00:56:47,055 --> 00:56:48,155 Go! Get him! 599 00:56:52,155 --> 00:56:53,655 Connie, just shoot the fucker! 600 00:56:57,655 --> 00:57:02,325 He just lost it. It's not Stuart. 601 00:57:04,505 --> 00:57:06,155 Move! Move! 602 00:58:06,155 --> 00:58:08,655 Lovely stay, Alexander. Thank you very much. 603 00:58:09,405 --> 00:58:11,105 I really enjoyed it. 604 00:58:15,635 --> 00:58:20,145 I was really surprised, Alexander, to be honest. 605 00:58:20,255 --> 00:58:24,330 I thought that middle class people had something wrong with them, you know? 606 00:58:24,480 --> 00:58:30,555 But they're just ordinary, aren't they? I was a bit shocked, to tell the truth. 607 00:58:34,755 --> 00:58:37,655 Over the next few months Stuart's trial for the attempted manslaughter 608 00:58:37,656 --> 00:58:41,455 of his not poofter, boing-boing-whoosh bed making neighbour was postponed once, 609 00:58:42,955 --> 00:58:44,155 twice, 610 00:58:46,155 --> 00:58:47,805 a third time, 611 00:58:48,705 --> 00:58:49,955 and then a fourth. 612 00:58:53,680 --> 00:58:58,145 He needed some cash so I gave him 250 quid for his car 613 00:58:58,155 --> 00:59:00,455 and I'm still waiting for the paperwork. 614 00:59:01,705 --> 00:59:04,555 Meanwhile, the campaign went from strength to strength. 615 00:59:05,105 --> 00:59:08,455 Newsletters, petitions, protests, even benefit gigs. 616 00:59:08,555 --> 00:59:12,105 And then it was Stuart's bright idea to go and see our local MP. 617 00:59:14,155 --> 00:59:15,655 Oh shit. 618 00:59:20,385 --> 00:59:22,955 I'm sorry, I'm just a bit nervous is all. 619 00:59:27,055 --> 00:59:28,855 Mr Shorter is not from Anne's constituency— 620 00:59:28,860 --> 00:59:33,145 I'm from Anne's constituency. I wish to take Stuart as my guest. 621 00:59:33,146 --> 00:59:34,255 Alexander... 622 00:59:34,256 --> 00:59:35,605 For that you'll have to make a new appointment. 623 00:59:35,606 --> 00:59:37,455 Oh, rubbish! She's got nothing else to do, has she? 624 00:59:38,205 --> 00:59:43,705 The council is not gonna have no emergency winter shelter for the homeless. 625 00:59:45,355 --> 00:59:47,955 And I'm frightened— 626 00:59:52,405 --> 00:59:56,155 In winter it's smack what keeps you fucking— 627 01:00:01,755 --> 01:00:03,155 I'm sorry. 628 01:00:04,755 --> 01:00:06,055 —keeps you warm. 629 01:00:07,155 --> 01:00:13,205 But this year there's going to be one more death a month, again. 630 01:00:15,055 --> 01:00:15,955 Why? 631 01:00:17,255 --> 01:00:18,505 Puppies. 632 01:00:19,755 --> 01:00:21,755 I'm not sure I follow you. 633 01:00:23,155 --> 01:00:24,655 On the streets. 634 01:00:27,655 --> 01:00:29,155 Pup—puppies. 635 01:00:35,305 --> 01:00:38,755 'Cause the homeless love their dogs, right? 636 01:00:40,055 --> 01:00:44,555 But the hostels only allow two to three places for pets. 637 01:00:45,155 --> 01:00:50,055 So, if there has been two new litters, 638 01:00:50,305 --> 01:00:53,204 then loads more people are gonna have dogs, aren't they? 639 01:00:53,205 --> 01:00:58,955 And therefore will be forced to sleep out. 640 01:00:59,155 --> 01:01:07,255 And hence... therefore... furthermore, more deaths. 641 01:01:12,055 --> 01:01:17,955 You see, on the street it's the little things that kill people. 642 01:01:26,780 --> 01:01:30,455 That Justice Howarth must hate the campaign's guts. Humiliation! 643 01:01:30,505 --> 01:01:34,105 Seven months after they were sent down Ruth and John— 644 01:01:34,106 --> 01:01:38,135 —have been released on bail after a high profile campaign by MPs 645 01:01:38,136 --> 01:01:41,163 and other homeless charities, they won the right to appeal against prison sentences 646 01:01:41,165 --> 01:01:43,155 four and five years. 647 01:01:43,165 --> 01:01:46,954 This was our first sight of Ruth Wyner and John Brock on the steps of the 648 01:01:46,955 --> 01:01:49,055 Royal Courts of Justice this morning. 649 01:01:49,155 --> 01:01:52,604 After seven months in jail, the so-called "Cambridge Two" have been released on 650 01:01:52,605 --> 01:01:56,705 unconditional bail and are now free to challenge their original convictions. 651 01:01:58,055 --> 01:01:59,755 I can't see if the light's on. 652 01:02:02,955 --> 01:02:06,154 Stuart, it's Alexander. Stop whatever illegal thing it is 653 01:02:06,155 --> 01:02:08,175 that you're doing and get down here! 654 01:02:21,755 --> 01:02:24,255 It's me muscular dystrophy. 655 01:02:26,155 --> 01:02:32,155 Humeroscapu... or something. Muscular dystrophy. 656 01:02:34,155 --> 01:02:37,305 It's a real gobstopper, I never learnt the name. 657 01:02:38,455 --> 01:02:40,355 What you don't know can't hurt you. 658 01:02:41,455 --> 01:02:48,954 I only came in to see the nurse because I wanted a cuddle and it spits too soon. 659 01:02:48,955 --> 01:02:50,655 Stuart! 660 01:02:51,605 --> 01:02:55,455 I thought maybe it's because of me muscular dystrophy. 661 01:02:56,155 --> 01:02:59,155 You know, 'cause your dick's a muscle, isn't it? 662 01:03:03,955 --> 01:03:06,155 It started on me ticker. 663 01:03:08,155 --> 01:03:13,255 They tried twice to put a pacemaker in me tit, 664 01:03:15,655 --> 01:03:20,255 but the veins just crumble 'cause of the amount of critic I've injected. 665 01:03:22,555 --> 01:03:24,955 Gotta laugh, haven't you? 666 01:03:39,655 --> 01:03:41,175 I can't believe he hadn't told you. 667 01:03:41,755 --> 01:03:44,145 He tells everyone. About everything. 668 01:03:44,205 --> 01:03:46,505 - Well, now, that's not true. - Mum, yes. 669 01:03:47,105 --> 01:03:50,055 That's his way of coping, isn't it? 670 01:03:50,155 --> 01:03:52,655 Twenty years. Non-stop. 671 01:03:53,555 --> 01:03:55,255 Ever since he first went on the streets. 672 01:03:55,755 --> 01:03:57,155 Twenty years? 673 01:03:57,705 --> 01:04:01,155 But I thought it was Gavvy's, um, his brother's suicide that made him homeless. 674 01:04:01,165 --> 01:04:02,955 Don't be stupid. 675 01:04:03,155 --> 01:04:06,055 Stuart had been on and off the streets since he was twelve. 676 01:04:06,155 --> 01:04:08,155 Then, all of a sudden, this little horror. 677 01:04:08,705 --> 01:04:11,005 Twelve years old, that's when it started. 678 01:04:12,155 --> 01:04:13,755 Gavvy had to run to fetch mum. 679 01:04:15,655 --> 01:04:17,355 Come, it's Stuart! 680 01:04:18,155 --> 01:04:20,705 Put me into care! You hear me!? 681 01:04:20,855 --> 01:04:23,155 Do it now otherwise I'll kill you! 682 01:04:23,255 --> 01:04:28,155 Put me into care now! I'll do the lot of you! Put me into care! 683 01:04:28,156 --> 01:04:31,255 I said, put me into care! 684 01:04:32,455 --> 01:04:34,055 In you get. Watch your head. 685 01:04:35,555 --> 01:04:37,405 He was taken into care that night. 686 01:04:38,145 --> 01:04:39,505 We didn't see him for three weeks. 687 01:04:39,705 --> 01:04:41,305 Another one for you, Mr Laverack. 688 01:04:41,455 --> 01:04:44,255 You're getting popular, he asked to come. 689 01:04:45,405 --> 01:04:48,185 Poor boy. Poor boy. 690 01:04:59,855 --> 01:05:01,655 Out of the frying pan into the fire. 691 01:05:01,855 --> 01:05:03,955 Well, we weren't the frying pan. 692 01:05:04,005 --> 01:05:05,255 You know what I mean. 693 01:05:06,155 --> 01:05:07,655 We just couldn't understand it. 694 01:05:08,955 --> 01:05:10,685 People said she ought to disown him. 695 01:05:11,955 --> 01:05:13,955 How can you wash your hands of your own child? 696 01:05:15,055 --> 01:05:16,655 He's my flesh and blood, I'd say. 697 01:05:17,855 --> 01:05:18,955 He's my son. 698 01:05:19,155 --> 01:05:21,205 I just wish I could do more. 699 01:05:23,855 --> 01:05:27,479 Working on the book after the end of the campaign, writing, rewriting, 700 01:05:27,480 --> 01:05:31,515 I realised then that I could never hope to justify or explain Stuart. 701 01:05:31,535 --> 01:05:34,485 And whatever had murdered his innocence had long ago ceased 702 01:05:34,486 --> 01:05:36,955 to be simple enough to sort out with words. 703 01:05:38,055 --> 01:05:40,505 All I could hope to do was to staple him to the page. 704 01:05:46,280 --> 01:05:48,255 - Hello? - It's in me tit. 705 01:05:48,555 --> 01:05:53,055 I'm at Papworth Heart Hospital. Come visit. 706 01:05:54,155 --> 01:05:58,945 Yeah, on your way, can you pop in to see me gran and grandpa? 707 01:05:58,955 --> 01:06:00,655 They've got a present for me. 708 01:06:00,855 --> 01:06:04,355 I told them it smells like sick but they don't listen. 709 01:06:13,155 --> 01:06:15,155 We haven't seen Stuart in years. 710 01:06:15,505 --> 01:06:16,955 Lots of years. 711 01:06:17,305 --> 01:06:21,055 Well, things haven't been very easy for him recently. 712 01:06:21,155 --> 01:06:23,755 His mother says it's the buses. 713 01:06:24,155 --> 01:06:25,905 They're not convenient. 714 01:06:31,955 --> 01:06:32,755 Stuart? 715 01:06:33,155 --> 01:06:37,555 - No. - Rory, his son. 716 01:06:44,655 --> 01:06:47,655 - Stuart. - No. 717 01:06:47,705 --> 01:06:49,555 Rex, his dad. 718 01:06:51,505 --> 01:06:53,755 A bad man, his real dad. 719 01:06:55,355 --> 01:06:57,055 Gypsies. 720 01:07:04,855 --> 01:07:06,055 Stuart? 721 01:07:06,155 --> 01:07:07,955 Gavvy, Stuey's brother. 722 01:07:08,255 --> 01:07:12,305 One day when Rex was beating our Judith real bad, 723 01:07:13,705 --> 01:07:15,555 Gavvy hit him over the head with a broom. 724 01:07:16,155 --> 01:07:17,655 He was only five. 725 01:07:19,755 --> 01:07:22,085 Rex moved out after that. 726 01:07:26,855 --> 01:07:28,705 I know why Stuart changed. 727 01:07:30,155 --> 01:07:32,655 Gavvy came 'round special to tell me. 728 01:07:34,155 --> 01:07:35,755 Promised I'd never tell. 729 01:07:38,955 --> 01:07:41,715 Three days later he committed suicide. 730 01:07:47,655 --> 01:07:49,485 To celebrate his getting better. 731 01:07:50,455 --> 01:07:52,190 Couldn't decide red or white. 732 01:07:52,325 --> 01:07:56,155 Tell him to come and see us. We've waited long enough. 733 01:07:57,155 --> 01:07:59,555 Can't wait forever. 734 01:08:18,905 --> 01:08:21,005 Oh, you fucking star. 735 01:08:36,655 --> 01:08:38,405 I almost died. 736 01:08:43,355 --> 01:08:45,955 How are Ruth and John? 737 01:08:46,310 --> 01:08:48,005 Not good. 738 01:08:50,135 --> 01:08:51,155 He can't work. 739 01:08:53,355 --> 01:08:54,755 Wife says he cries in his sleep. 740 01:08:59,855 --> 01:09:00,955 And Ruth? 741 01:09:01,255 --> 01:09:02,355 Got cancer. 742 01:09:06,055 --> 01:09:07,255 Bastards. 743 01:09:08,355 --> 01:09:10,755 Now do you see what I mean about the system? 744 01:09:10,965 --> 01:09:14,055 The system. It's the system that's going to keep her alive. 745 01:09:14,655 --> 01:09:19,055 It's the system that's just given you a £5,000 pacemaker for nothing. 746 01:09:20,155 --> 01:09:22,805 - Hello? - Excuse me guys, do either of you know where the toilet is? 747 01:09:23,055 --> 01:09:25,255 Uh, yeah, sure. I saw a sign that said down there on the left. 748 01:09:25,455 --> 01:09:26,655 Thanks, mate. 749 01:09:35,955 --> 01:09:37,305 Fucking hell. 750 01:09:38,005 --> 01:09:39,905 I need a cigarette. 751 01:09:41,955 --> 01:09:44,305 Yeah, the whole town's like it. 752 01:09:45,155 --> 01:09:47,155 All cripples. 753 01:09:48,255 --> 01:09:52,430 I spent six years in a school like this. 754 01:09:56,155 --> 01:09:58,955 Day I end up like that, eh, 755 01:09:59,255 --> 01:10:02,255 death day. 756 01:10:03,555 --> 01:10:04,955 Care was like this? 757 01:10:05,155 --> 01:10:07,655 No. Spagie school. 758 01:10:08,155 --> 01:10:11,455 They sent me because of my muscular dystrophy. 759 01:10:12,355 --> 01:10:15,455 Said I wasn't allowed to go to proper school. 760 01:10:15,505 --> 01:10:17,605 Well, it was the '70s. 761 01:10:17,955 --> 01:10:21,165 Funny thing, that. There was nothing wrong with me at that stage. 762 01:10:21,166 --> 01:10:25,455 I was just a bit uncoordinated, but you'd hardly notice. 763 01:10:27,455 --> 01:10:30,655 But they said since I was going to die a spag, 764 01:10:30,660 --> 01:10:33,505 I might as well get used to the idea. 765 01:10:36,005 --> 01:10:39,405 Before I was too spagie to understand, I suppose. 766 01:10:39,406 --> 01:10:40,155 Now all together. 767 01:10:41,455 --> 01:10:43,655 Douchebag! Douchebag! Douchebag! 768 01:10:46,755 --> 01:10:49,355 Gimpy! Oi, gimpy, come here! 769 01:10:50,055 --> 01:10:52,155 Where's your brother now? 770 01:10:54,640 --> 01:10:57,355 'Help me! Hold me! Love me!' 771 01:11:02,535 --> 01:11:04,655 We're coming to kill you. 772 01:11:17,955 --> 01:11:19,755 Did they kick the shit out of you? 773 01:11:20,155 --> 01:11:21,755 Every day, mate. 774 01:11:23,155 --> 01:11:25,755 Give 'em something to do after school. 775 01:11:27,955 --> 01:11:30,055 Then Gavvy would console me. 776 01:11:33,055 --> 01:11:37,155 Please, not Howarth. Please, not— 777 01:11:37,156 --> 01:11:40,655 Only one month out of Papworth, Stuart's day in court for 778 01:11:40,656 --> 01:11:42,955 attempting to cut off his neighbour's head finally arrived. 779 01:11:43,655 --> 01:11:45,745 We were dreading it would be Ruth and John's old judge. 780 01:11:45,755 --> 01:11:47,755 Oh fuck! 781 01:11:48,155 --> 01:11:50,355 All rise for Justice Howarth. 782 01:11:52,855 --> 01:11:55,405 At this point Stuart really was looking at being imprisoned for life. 783 01:12:00,155 --> 01:12:02,355 Court is now in session. 784 01:12:09,555 --> 01:12:13,705 This case concerns Stuart Clive Shorter. 785 01:12:16,355 --> 01:12:21,170 Affray, disorderly conduct, resisting arrest, 786 01:12:21,205 --> 01:12:24,305 an incident at the accused's flat. 787 01:12:38,655 --> 01:12:42,255 No. No, he just said the whole thing was nonsense. 788 01:12:43,155 --> 01:12:47,154 All that adding charges, taking them away, attempted murder, not— 789 01:12:47,155 --> 01:12:49,305 I don't know, I mean, what can I say? 790 01:12:49,355 --> 01:12:53,105 The lucky bastard got off on a series of technicalities. 791 01:12:53,305 --> 01:12:56,155 You know what Judge Howarth thinks about— 792 01:12:56,160 --> 01:12:59,755 Oh shit. Stuart, I'm so sorry. Are you alright? 793 01:13:00,055 --> 01:13:01,355 I'm so sorry. 794 01:13:04,455 --> 01:13:07,805 He's free! He's absolutely fucking free. 795 01:13:39,855 --> 01:13:41,455 Oh, you're disgusting. 796 01:13:45,655 --> 01:13:47,655 Wakey, wakey. 797 01:13:54,155 --> 01:13:58,455 Sun has got his hat on, mate. Sun has got his hat on, mate. 798 01:13:59,255 --> 01:14:01,005 Rise and shine! 799 01:14:01,185 --> 01:14:04,105 Now, I've got to try on a suit for me sister's wedding. 800 01:14:04,445 --> 01:14:06,455 Can you give me a lift? 801 01:14:16,955 --> 01:14:18,455 Have you listened to the tape? 802 01:14:35,455 --> 01:14:40,555 I was nine, Alexander, when it started. Nine. 803 01:14:42,555 --> 01:14:44,480 It was three years of abuse. 804 01:14:46,105 --> 01:14:48,055 My own brother. 805 01:14:53,155 --> 01:14:56,205 And then his mate joined in. 806 01:15:05,355 --> 01:15:10,475 That night, I ju— I couldn't, I couldn't take it no more, you know? 807 01:15:12,855 --> 01:15:14,275 They had done everything. 808 01:15:19,155 --> 01:15:21,955 There was nothing more they could do. 809 01:15:48,155 --> 01:15:52,005 - You got any more of these? - Yeah, backseat, I think. 810 01:15:53,155 --> 01:15:55,355 I think the reason mum still pampers him like she does 811 01:15:55,356 --> 01:15:58,305 is because she feels guilty about what Gavvy did. 812 01:15:58,855 --> 01:16:00,955 But he did the same to me. 813 01:16:02,925 --> 01:16:04,165 I'm the same as Stu. 814 01:16:04,185 --> 01:16:07,455 One minute, nice as pie; next minute, I'm a rattlesnake. 815 01:16:09,155 --> 01:16:13,155 How'd I get to be like this? What murdered the little boy I was? 816 01:16:13,156 --> 01:16:15,575 When the police found Gavvy, they said he'd really suffered. 817 01:16:18,905 --> 01:16:20,255 Legs all over the show. 818 01:16:21,505 --> 01:16:23,405 That boy has suffered. 819 01:16:24,655 --> 01:16:26,155 Happy-go-lucky little thing. 820 01:16:26,355 --> 01:16:28,355 Mr Laverack. 821 01:16:28,905 --> 01:16:31,255 - Poor boy. Poor boy. - Out of the frying pan into the fire. 822 01:16:31,256 --> 01:16:34,155 - Put me into care now! - Douchebag! Douchebag! 823 01:16:34,255 --> 01:16:38,005 - Douchebag! Douchebag! Douchebag! - We're coming to kill you. 824 01:16:38,155 --> 01:16:42,165 The tablets he'd taken had eaten his kidneys and his liver away before he died. 825 01:16:42,166 --> 01:16:44,655 Always such a caring boy. Happy-go-lucky little thing. 826 01:16:45,055 --> 01:16:46,955 And I'm glad. 827 01:16:47,155 --> 01:16:48,510 I'm glad Gavvy suffered. 828 01:16:57,180 --> 01:16:58,805 That's Gavvy. 829 01:17:03,230 --> 01:17:05,275 That's Gavvy and me. 830 01:17:11,055 --> 01:17:13,175 So he's what murdered the boy you were. 831 01:17:15,555 --> 01:17:18,395 - What made you change. - Ah, wasn't that. 832 01:17:21,155 --> 01:17:22,305 What was it then? 833 01:17:24,455 --> 01:17:30,655 So many people have had the same sort of childhood and experiences 834 01:17:30,656 --> 01:17:35,585 as what I have and they learn to accept and cope and live a very, 835 01:17:36,655 --> 01:17:40,350 in brackets, "normal and competitive life". 836 01:17:40,355 --> 01:17:43,255 I'm quite philosophical about that. 837 01:17:48,155 --> 01:17:50,655 If you had to change one thing about your life, what would it be? 838 01:17:51,155 --> 01:17:53,205 Well, how much is one thing? 839 01:17:54,155 --> 01:17:57,155 It's very easy to blame, isn't it? 840 01:17:58,755 --> 01:18:01,055 Me muscular dystrophy? 841 01:18:01,955 --> 01:18:03,555 Nonces? 842 01:18:04,155 --> 01:18:05,455 Gavvy? 843 01:18:07,155 --> 01:18:09,495 Honestly, it'd be easier to change me. 844 01:18:10,655 --> 01:18:11,955 One thing only. 845 01:18:19,755 --> 01:18:22,775 The day I discovered violence. 846 01:18:24,655 --> 01:18:26,555 Me step-father 847 01:18:26,755 --> 01:18:30,155 said if I didn't go out there and stick up for myself, 848 01:18:30,655 --> 01:18:32,655 he'd belt us once. 849 01:19:06,455 --> 01:19:09,255 Fucking fantastic. 850 01:19:13,155 --> 01:19:15,255 Weakling became strong. 851 01:19:16,655 --> 01:19:19,355 The day that I found violence 852 01:19:20,255 --> 01:19:23,205 I felt fifty times more strong. 853 01:19:25,155 --> 01:19:31,255 After you've been bullied and pushed about, called spastic, 854 01:19:31,305 --> 01:19:40,130 you learn that violence, and fear of violence, and madness, it scares people. 855 01:19:42,155 --> 01:19:47,155 I used to deliberately get myself in a rage. 856 01:19:47,355 --> 01:19:52,055 And after six months, I found I couldn't stop them. 857 01:19:52,355 --> 01:19:55,705 I wasn't making the madness up no more. 858 01:19:59,155 --> 01:20:01,555 You know what, Alexander? 859 01:20:04,155 --> 01:20:07,255 I don't know myself or [indiscernible]. 860 01:20:08,955 --> 01:20:10,155 Madness. 861 01:20:11,255 --> 01:20:15,455 Sometimes I think I'm the child of the devil. 862 01:20:16,405 --> 01:20:18,655 I let the devil in. 863 01:20:21,355 --> 01:20:23,555 Now I can't get him out. 864 01:20:25,155 --> 01:20:26,855 I tried... 865 01:20:27,355 --> 01:20:30,685 burning him out, and cutting him out, and... 866 01:20:33,055 --> 01:20:35,155 he don't take no notice. 867 01:20:35,855 --> 01:20:37,055 Why should he? 868 01:20:37,355 --> 01:20:40,080 He don't wanna be homeless. 869 01:20:51,855 --> 01:20:53,245 You know, there's still one question left. 870 01:20:53,265 --> 01:20:56,155 - What's that, mate? - Guess. 871 01:20:57,215 --> 01:20:59,205 We're writing the book backwards, 872 01:21:00,455 --> 01:21:03,455 so what's the last bit of information we need? 873 01:21:06,955 --> 01:21:08,655 What's your date of birth? 874 01:21:09,055 --> 01:21:11,055 Oh, right, yeah. 875 01:21:12,655 --> 01:21:15,285 I am Stuart Clive Shorter. 876 01:21:16,155 --> 01:21:22,405 I was born on the 19th of the 9th, 1968. 877 01:21:26,055 --> 01:21:28,155 So, you're... 878 01:21:29,055 --> 01:21:34,355 - You're 33. - I am 33. I'm getting older, as they say. 879 01:21:35,155 --> 01:21:42,205 And I have led a very controversial and unpleasant life. 880 01:21:44,535 --> 01:21:46,155 Oh, yeah. 881 01:21:48,155 --> 01:21:52,255 Eh? Best man or what, eh? 882 01:21:57,355 --> 01:21:59,655 It is gonna be grand. 883 01:22:23,055 --> 01:22:25,155 P—P—P—Peterborough, Cambridge— 884 01:22:27,855 --> 01:22:34,855 —on 96 and 95.7 FM. And 1026 AM. BBC Radio Cambridgeshire. 885 01:22:35,155 --> 01:22:36,355 The top story this hour— 886 01:22:44,155 --> 01:22:46,205 —near the French entrance to the channel tunnel. 887 01:22:46,255 --> 01:22:49,155 Police have now formally indentified the man who died after being hit 888 01:22:49,156 --> 01:22:51,755 by a train near Cambridge early this morning. 889 01:22:52,155 --> 01:22:55,165 He was Stuart Shorter, a 33-year-old from Waterbeach. 890 01:22:55,166 --> 01:23:00,155 The coroner has been informed and an inquest will take place at a date to be fixed. 891 01:23:12,155 --> 01:23:14,155 Judith? It's Alexander. 892 01:23:19,655 --> 01:23:23,255 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. 893 01:23:23,305 --> 01:23:25,225 Was it suicide? 894 01:23:26,055 --> 01:23:28,480 I don't know. He didn't leave a note. 895 01:23:29,755 --> 01:23:32,155 But then, suicides often don't. 896 01:23:33,355 --> 01:23:37,755 All I do know is that he stepped in front of the 11:15 Cambridge to Kings Lynn. 897 01:23:38,855 --> 01:23:43,155 —I have overcome the world, says the Lord. 898 01:23:43,305 --> 01:23:47,255 Since the Earthly life of Stuart has come to an end, 899 01:23:48,155 --> 01:23:50,955 we commit his body to be buried. 900 01:23:51,155 --> 01:23:55,155 Earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust. 901 01:23:55,255 --> 01:23:59,255 In sure and certain hope of the resurrection to eternal life. 902 01:23:59,355 --> 01:24:03,155 - To our Lord Jesus Christ, Amen. - Amen. 903 01:24:57,655 --> 01:25:00,155 Hello, Alexander. It's Stuart. 904 01:25:00,165 --> 01:25:02,055 Hello, Stuart. 905 01:25:02,155 --> 01:25:10,155 You know, admitting I've had lots to drink and that, but I can't help reflect about my brother 906 01:25:10,955 --> 01:25:13,055 and my brother's friend. 907 01:25:13,155 --> 01:25:15,155 And they didn't believe me. 908 01:25:16,155 --> 01:25:18,055 And they didn't care. 909 01:25:18,155 --> 01:25:19,655 The abuse. 910 01:25:20,155 --> 01:25:24,535 Being asked to do things that I wouldn't have thought possible that anyone 911 01:25:24,536 --> 01:25:27,385 could ask of an 11-year-old. 912 01:25:30,155 --> 01:25:39,155 I'm just head-butting, and head-butting, and head-butting, and head-butting. 913 01:25:39,305 --> 01:25:44,155 The more that you speak, the more they disbelieve. 914 01:25:45,155 --> 01:25:48,455 And nobody was listening to anything I had to say. 915 01:25:49,655 --> 01:25:52,145 When I've got my drink inside me 916 01:25:52,155 --> 01:25:57,455 I sit here having mad conversations with myself. 917 01:25:57,755 --> 01:26:00,465 Talking about mutilating myself, 918 01:26:01,505 --> 01:26:04,155 killing myself, 919 01:26:05,155 --> 01:26:08,155 tracking down those who are responsible. 920 01:26:09,155 --> 01:26:13,155 I want to just lay down and die. 921 01:26:15,155 --> 01:26:19,255 I feel so dirty, and fucking horrible 922 01:26:19,285 --> 01:26:23,455 and hating and attacking anyone I get close to. 923 01:26:24,705 --> 01:26:26,155 I just wish 924 01:26:27,655 --> 01:26:29,055 once 925 01:26:29,155 --> 01:26:33,155 there could be an escape from this madness. 926 01:26:47,155 --> 01:26:50,755 The book was finally published in April 2005. 927 01:26:54,455 --> 01:26:56,655 I think Stuart would have liked it.