1
00:00:05,301 --> 00:00:08,035
Oh, we respect her.
It's you we don't respect.
2
00:00:09,437 --> 00:00:10,938
Anyhoo...
3
00:00:11,072 --> 00:00:13,740
See, we don't respect you,
'cause you say things like that.
4
00:00:15,076 --> 00:00:18,536
Oh, yay. I'm in the Wizards' Lair,
5
00:00:18,571 --> 00:00:21,880
or as I like to call it,
"the garage sale that never happened."
6
00:00:23,509 --> 00:00:24,951
OK, guys, now listen up.
7
00:00:24,985 --> 00:00:26,670
Dad wants me to teach
the lesson today
8
00:00:27,272 --> 00:00:29,186
while he's away at the No
Wizard Left Behind Conference.
9
00:00:30,700 --> 00:00:33,560
So, let's get this over with.
OK, uh...
10
00:00:33,594 --> 00:00:35,002
What is wizard wear?
11
00:00:35,036 --> 00:00:36,411
Max.
12
00:00:36,445 --> 00:00:37,990
Alex is on my side of the bench.
13
00:00:38,025 --> 00:00:39,327
You don't own the bench, Max.
14
00:00:39,361 --> 00:00:40,430
That side, I do.
15
00:00:40,601 --> 00:00:41,933
[Justin] You are being childish!
16
00:00:41,967 --> 00:00:43,628
[all arguing]
17
00:00:43,663 --> 00:00:46,407
Don't make me stand up!
18
00:00:46,441 --> 00:00:48,482
That's it. I quit!
19
00:00:48,516 --> 00:00:50,157
Justin, it's all yours.
20
00:00:52,767 --> 00:00:55,909
She, uh, lasted a lot longer
than Dad said she would.
21
00:00:57,649 --> 00:00:59,352
[beeping]
22
00:01:02,329 --> 00:01:05,370
Today, we continue with
magical wizard garments.
23
00:01:05,404 --> 00:01:07,142
Having covered... [creaks]
24
00:01:07,176 --> 00:01:11,219
...armor, we move on to sportswear.
25
00:01:13,927 --> 00:01:15,396
This is a speed shirt,
26
00:01:15,430 --> 00:01:17,301
it gives you supersonic speed.
27
00:01:17,336 --> 00:01:19,843
Does it grow your hair really long?
28
00:01:21,114 --> 00:01:23,452
Speed shirt.
29
00:01:24,522 --> 00:01:25,792
[clears throat]
30
00:01:25,993 --> 00:01:28,030
Now watch how fast I can
run into the sub shop,
31
00:01:28,064 --> 00:01:30,136
make a sandwich and come back.
32
00:01:30,170 --> 00:01:32,474
OK. Ready?
33
00:01:34,179 --> 00:01:35,949
Done!
34
00:01:35,983 --> 00:01:37,787
No way.
35
00:01:37,821 --> 00:01:39,791
Yes way.
36
00:01:39,825 --> 00:01:41,929
Wow.
37
00:01:41,963 --> 00:01:43,999
You forgot the cheese.
38
00:01:44,034 --> 00:01:45,704
Oh! Hang on.
39
00:01:47,942 --> 00:01:50,446
Is that enough cheese for you?
I think so.
40
00:01:50,480 --> 00:01:52,083
Nice.
41
00:01:53,153 --> 00:01:55,957
OK. Item two...
42
00:01:55,991 --> 00:01:57,559
It's called a "Night Cap."
43
00:01:57,594 --> 00:01:59,363
Whoever wears it falls
asleep instantly.
44
00:01:59,397 --> 00:02:01,200
Well, are you going
to keep teaching?
45
00:02:01,334 --> 00:02:03,437
'Cause I wanna be asleep
for that. Hand it over.
46
00:02:03,471 --> 00:02:06,709
Oh, I'm tempted, but then you
wouldn't know about these.
47
00:02:07,846 --> 00:02:09,481
[shouts]
48
00:02:10,650 --> 00:02:12,920
Smarty Pants.
49
00:02:14,725 --> 00:02:17,428
They give whoever wears them
superior knowledge on anything
50
00:02:17,463 --> 00:02:19,465
and everything there is to know.
51
00:02:19,500 --> 00:02:22,837
I'd put them on, but I'm
already smarter than them.
52
00:02:22,871 --> 00:02:26,877
Ooh, you're smarter than pants.
Good for you.
53
00:02:26,911 --> 00:02:28,479
Now pay attention while I read off
54
00:02:28,714 --> 00:02:30,416
some of the possible
side effects of keeping
55
00:02:30,450 --> 00:02:32,920
the pants on too long.
Side effects may be:
56
00:02:32,954 --> 00:02:36,224
Headache, nausea, rash, chronic giggling,
belly-button bubbles,
57
00:02:36,259 --> 00:02:37,760
"say it don't spray it" disease,
58
00:02:38,062 --> 00:02:39,964
tongue reversal,
ear gas, sweaty knees,
59
00:02:39,998 --> 00:02:43,702
Picasso face,
problems with the bowel...
60
00:02:43,737 --> 00:02:45,538
All right, lesson's over.
Come on, Max.
61
00:02:45,573 --> 00:02:46,874
I think I'm gonna stay
62
00:02:47,008 --> 00:02:48,877
- and draw on his face.
- OK, cool.
63
00:02:48,911 --> 00:02:51,447
* Well you know everything's
gonna be a breeze *
64
00:02:51,482 --> 00:02:53,585
* And the end will no doubt,
justify the means *
65
00:02:54,020 --> 00:02:55,988
* You can fix any problem
with the slightest of ease *
66
00:02:56,323 --> 00:02:58,724
* Yes please But you might find
out it'll go to your head *
67
00:02:58,760 --> 00:03:01,229
* When you write a report
on a book you never read *
68
00:03:01,264 --> 00:03:04,135
* With the snap of your fingers
you can make your bed *
69
00:03:04,169 --> 00:03:05,670
* That's what I said *
70
00:03:05,772 --> 00:03:08,642
* Everything is not what it seems *
71
00:03:08,676 --> 00:03:12,448
* When you can get all you
wanted in your wildest dreams *
72
00:03:12,482 --> 00:03:16,252
* You might run into trouble
if you go to extremes *
73
00:03:16,287 --> 00:03:20,689
* Because everything
is not what it seems *
74
00:03:20,724 --> 00:03:23,893
* Everything is not what it seems *
75
00:03:23,928 --> 00:03:28,131
* When you can have what you
want by the simplest of means *
76
00:03:28,166 --> 00:03:31,736
* Be careful not to mess
with the balance of things *
77
00:03:31,771 --> 00:03:35,675
* Because everything is not... *
78
00:03:35,709 --> 00:03:37,711
* What it seems *
79
00:03:37,815 --> 00:03:42,718
Sync by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
80
00:03:42,752 --> 00:03:45,055
Alfred, the plan was,
if you're going to be ref,
81
00:03:45,089 --> 00:03:46,325
you wouldn't have thrown
me out of the game.
82
00:03:46,659 --> 00:03:49,996
Hey, when I put this shirt on,
the friendship goes away.
83
00:03:51,300 --> 00:03:53,735
Hey, look at the line
for the water fountain.
84
00:03:53,770 --> 00:03:55,571
Oh, wow.
85
00:03:57,675 --> 00:04:01,614
Hey, Zeke, what's with the line?
Are the other ones broken?
86
00:04:01,648 --> 00:04:04,718
Nope. The water that comes out of
this one is the best in the school.
87
00:04:04,752 --> 00:04:07,288
I don't get it. Water is water.
88
00:04:07,323 --> 00:04:11,694
I beg to differ.
This water is delicious.
89
00:04:11,728 --> 00:04:15,231
Excuse me, sheriff's in town.
90
00:04:15,265 --> 00:04:18,633
Step away from the watering hole.
91
00:04:22,837 --> 00:04:26,072
Now that is some fine H-2-0.
92
00:04:26,106 --> 00:04:28,140
[bell rings]
93
00:04:28,174 --> 00:04:29,708
[all groaning]
94
00:04:29,742 --> 00:04:31,843
If I could figure out a
way to bottle this stuff,
95
00:04:31,877 --> 00:04:33,611
I could make a fortune.
96
00:04:33,645 --> 00:04:35,279
You can bottle it.
97
00:04:35,313 --> 00:04:38,549
Alfred, don't bother me.
I'm thinking.
98
00:04:38,584 --> 00:04:42,522
Hey, Alex. Are you as excited as
I am about the Tribeca Quiz Bowl?
99
00:04:42,556 --> 00:04:45,224
Oh, my gosh! No!
100
00:04:45,258 --> 00:04:47,626
You're excited.
101
00:04:47,660 --> 00:04:49,727
Who wouldn't be?
It's an academic decathlon.
102
00:04:49,762 --> 00:04:51,562
And when I take my team to victory,
103
00:04:51,596 --> 00:04:53,330
people are gonna know me as Harper,
104
00:04:53,364 --> 00:04:55,232
the girl who's got the brains,
105
00:04:55,399 --> 00:04:58,734
and not just Harper,
the girl who's the fashion dynamo.
106
00:04:58,768 --> 00:05:02,003
Harper, if you want people
to notice that you're smart,
107
00:05:02,037 --> 00:05:03,971
you might want to wear
a little less produce.
108
00:05:04,006 --> 00:05:06,174
[scoffs] That's not gonna happen.
109
00:05:06,208 --> 00:05:09,343
Papayas just came into season.
110
00:05:09,377 --> 00:05:11,445
Well, I'd like to be known as Alex,
111
00:05:11,479 --> 00:05:13,479
the girl who doesn't
care what she's known as.
112
00:05:13,514 --> 00:05:16,314
- You are known as that.
- I don't care.
113
00:05:16,348 --> 00:05:19,917
See? It looked like I really didn't
care there for a second. It was good.
114
00:05:19,952 --> 00:05:22,787
Oh my gosh, there's Dean.
I hope he knows me.
115
00:05:23,588 --> 00:05:24,955
[Harper] Dean Moriarty?
116
00:05:24,990 --> 00:05:26,357
You don't want to know him.
117
00:05:26,558 --> 00:05:30,192
I hear he plays with firecrackers.
118
00:05:30,227 --> 00:05:32,159
Dean Moriarty.
119
00:05:33,561 --> 00:05:36,462
I was wondering if you could
be a good little kemo sabe
120
00:05:36,496 --> 00:05:39,964
and rustle up some students
to help gussy up the gym
121
00:05:39,999 --> 00:05:42,632
for the big Quiz Bowl this year.
122
00:05:42,666 --> 00:05:45,066
You gotta slow down, Mr. Laritate.
123
00:05:45,100 --> 00:05:47,434
I'm only in my first
semester of cowboy.
124
00:05:49,937 --> 00:05:54,005
All right, Dean. You and your whole
posse are all on set-up patrol.
125
00:05:54,040 --> 00:05:58,208
Hey, setting up might be all right.
What time should we be there?
126
00:05:58,242 --> 00:06:01,344
What? You'll do it?
127
00:06:01,378 --> 00:06:03,579
That was a lasso toss in the dark.
128
00:06:03,613 --> 00:06:05,214
I'll meet you at 3:00.
129
00:06:05,248 --> 00:06:07,916
Moriarty, you're
turning into a citizen.
130
00:06:09,752 --> 00:06:12,520
Looks like I'll be helping set up
the gym for Quiz Bowl this year.
131
00:06:12,554 --> 00:06:15,422
Why do I have a feeling you're just
doing that to get to know Dean?
132
00:06:15,456 --> 00:06:17,790
'Cause I'm making
it pretty obvious.
133
00:06:19,460 --> 00:06:22,061
- Hey, Dean.
- What's up, Russo?
134
00:06:22,095 --> 00:06:24,629
- Yeah, what's up, Russo?
- She's cool.
135
00:06:24,664 --> 00:06:27,365
She's cool. She's cool.
Clear some space.
136
00:06:28,834 --> 00:06:32,136
So, um, I hear you're setting up
the gym for Quiz Bowl this year.
137
00:06:32,171 --> 00:06:34,639
That's kind of my thing,
maybe we should talk about that
138
00:06:34,740 --> 00:06:37,341
and see how it's going to work.
Wanna thumb wrestle for it?
139
00:06:37,375 --> 00:06:38,742
Cute.
140
00:06:38,776 --> 00:06:40,543
[giggles] Oh, I know.
141
00:06:42,980 --> 00:06:45,881
Most chicks don't like to get down
and dirty with how things work.
142
00:06:45,916 --> 00:06:48,083
They usually just make
posters and gossip.
143
00:06:48,351 --> 00:06:51,652
Really? 'Cause it sounds like you're
gossiping about chicks right now.
144
00:06:51,686 --> 00:06:53,320
I'll be setting up
the big boy stuff.
145
00:06:53,921 --> 00:06:56,723
I'll get you some cardboard and
you can make yourself a poster.
146
00:07:01,794 --> 00:07:04,294
So, uh, Dean,
what are you thinking?
147
00:07:04,329 --> 00:07:06,863
I think I'm setting up for
the Quiz Bowl with Russo
148
00:07:06,897 --> 00:07:08,530
while you guys are making posters.
149
00:07:08,565 --> 00:07:10,365
Got it, Dean.
150
00:07:10,399 --> 00:07:12,301
Guys, we get to make posters!
151
00:07:12,335 --> 00:07:13,836
[all] Yeah!
152
00:07:25,150 --> 00:07:27,784
- Whatcha doin'?
- What's it look like I'm doing?
153
00:07:27,818 --> 00:07:29,952
- I'm making a pizza.
- Watch it.
154
00:07:30,053 --> 00:07:32,755
I own sarcasm and didn't give
you permission to use it.
155
00:07:32,789 --> 00:07:34,490
Cute.
156
00:07:34,524 --> 00:07:36,158
Get used to it.
157
00:07:36,192 --> 00:07:38,293
OK, so, um,
what do you want me to do?
158
00:07:38,327 --> 00:07:41,195
You can finish wiring the
last buzzer for me. - OK.
159
00:07:41,229 --> 00:07:45,098
Green goes to red goes to blue, goes to
blue-red goes to green-red goes to
blue-green.
160
00:07:47,634 --> 00:07:51,435
Uh, OK, I missed all of that.
But, yeah, I'll figure it out. It's good.
161
00:07:55,472 --> 00:07:58,840
Oh, hey, Harper. Nice headband.
Are those real grapes?
162
00:07:58,874 --> 00:08:02,442
[scoffs] No. The real grapes
didn't survive the washing machine.
163
00:08:02,476 --> 00:08:03,743
But you know what?
164
00:08:03,777 --> 00:08:06,312
It took this...
165
00:08:06,347 --> 00:08:08,214
...to figure out this.
166
00:08:11,518 --> 00:08:13,819
Yes, it did, Harper.
167
00:08:13,853 --> 00:08:16,320
Do you mind if my team
practices our buzzer technique?
168
00:08:16,354 --> 00:08:18,288
Let me just hook this up first.
169
00:08:20,958 --> 00:08:23,525
And... Oh, that looks pretty. OK.
170
00:08:26,396 --> 00:08:29,231
All right, Team Maroon...
ready positions!
171
00:08:33,200 --> 00:08:35,099
This dangerous South
American spider
172
00:08:35,401 --> 00:08:38,502
is often found in boxes of exported fruit,
particularly bananas.
173
00:08:38,536 --> 00:08:39,769
[buzzers clang]
174
00:08:39,804 --> 00:08:42,171
[electrical zapping]
175
00:08:47,910 --> 00:08:52,013
Does anyone else's hair feel hot?
176
00:08:52,048 --> 00:08:54,416
What's happening?
177
00:08:56,218 --> 00:08:59,387
Don't look at me, I'm a girl.
I was just making posters.
178
00:09:00,689 --> 00:09:03,957
[theme music]
179
00:09:03,992 --> 00:09:06,826
Thank you very much, Alex.
180
00:09:06,860 --> 00:09:08,727
Nellie dropped out
of the Quiz Bowl.
181
00:09:08,762 --> 00:09:10,929
That whole buzzer
accident freaked her out.
182
00:09:10,964 --> 00:09:13,599
Oh, waa waa. She looks better
with her hair up anyway.
183
00:09:13,634 --> 00:09:16,702
Maybe if you weren't so concerned
with getting to know Dean,
184
00:09:16,737 --> 00:09:19,170
you would've hooked the
wires up the right way.
185
00:09:19,205 --> 00:09:22,406
Now, now, don't go blaming Dean,
I would've jacked that up anyway.
186
00:09:24,576 --> 00:09:27,377
And besides, can't you just get
someone to fill in for Nellie?
187
00:09:27,411 --> 00:09:30,915
No. Everyone in school is already on
their teams, so we have to forfeit.
188
00:09:30,949 --> 00:09:33,485
[groans] Justin's team is
probably gonna win now.
189
00:09:33,519 --> 00:09:35,186
Now I'll never get
a new reputation.
190
00:09:35,587 --> 00:09:38,522
It's really hard being known
just as the glamour girl.
191
00:09:42,328 --> 00:09:45,397
I wish you were smart,
then you could fill in for Nellie.
192
00:09:45,431 --> 00:09:47,065
I am smart.
193
00:09:47,100 --> 00:09:49,801
- I'm street smart.
- But not book smart.
194
00:09:49,835 --> 00:09:51,803
I am, too, book smart.
195
00:09:51,904 --> 00:09:55,439
Sure, I don't read books, but I hollow
them out and hide things in them.
196
00:09:56,808 --> 00:09:59,844
Hey, Harper. Heard about
Nellie's little, uh, "accident."
197
00:09:59,878 --> 00:10:02,914
Thank you, Alex. - Yeah, nice work.
Way to zap the competition.
198
00:10:02,948 --> 00:10:05,750
Hey, just because you're
winning through "forfeit,"
199
00:10:05,784 --> 00:10:08,886
doesn't mean you really win.
That's not a satisfying victory.
200
00:10:08,920 --> 00:10:11,621
Oh, well, I'm pretty satisfied,
how about you Zeke?
201
00:10:11,656 --> 00:10:13,957
I'm very satisfied,
thanks for asking.
202
00:10:15,960 --> 00:10:18,994
- Miss me high and hit me low.
- That's what I'm talking about.
203
00:10:19,029 --> 00:10:20,629
[both] Oh!
204
00:10:22,798 --> 00:10:25,366
Well, guess what?
You tools didn't win.
205
00:10:25,401 --> 00:10:28,803
Harper's team doesn't have to
forfeit because I just joined it.
206
00:10:28,837 --> 00:10:32,906
You? Come on, Alex.
You got a "D" in lunch.
207
00:10:32,940 --> 00:10:35,442
Ooh! Ouch! Fly it
by and hit me high!
208
00:10:35,476 --> 00:10:37,643
[both whoop] Oh!
209
00:10:37,678 --> 00:10:39,511
Oh, please.
210
00:10:39,545 --> 00:10:42,380
The Quiz Bowl is just a glorified
trivia game. I know stuff.
211
00:10:42,414 --> 00:10:46,350
You know what? Beating you in this
competition will be a delight.
212
00:10:46,384 --> 00:10:47,851
And to make things fair,
213
00:10:47,885 --> 00:10:49,486
- which I should,
- Mm-hmm.
214
00:10:49,887 --> 00:10:52,121
I'll even loan you my 15,
000 hand-written cross-referenced
215
00:10:52,156 --> 00:10:54,457
index cards of informacionica!
216
00:10:56,626 --> 00:11:01,663
Does one of those cards tell you
not to answer the phone, "Yello?"
217
00:11:01,697 --> 00:11:03,364
I can't wait for
this Quiz Bowl now.
218
00:11:04,032 --> 00:11:06,400
Zeke, are you feeling the need to
do what I'm feeling the need to do??
219
00:11:06,434 --> 00:11:08,568
- The need to blog about it?
- Oh, yes!
220
00:11:12,639 --> 00:11:14,306
Alex, what are you doing?
221
00:11:14,573 --> 00:11:17,842
You're just going to embarrass
yourself in front of everyone.
222
00:11:17,876 --> 00:11:19,676
I'm gonna have to hit the books.
223
00:11:19,711 --> 00:11:22,312
OK, but not the ones
that are hollowed out.
224
00:11:22,346 --> 00:11:24,547
No.
225
00:11:36,959 --> 00:11:38,425
[alarm sounds]
226
00:11:38,460 --> 00:11:40,293
[automated voice] Warning! Warning!
227
00:11:40,928 --> 00:11:43,730
- The prolonged use of Smarty Pants...
- Shh! OK, we get it!
228
00:11:43,764 --> 00:11:49,201
may cause side effects,
such as: headache, nausea,
229
00:11:49,235 --> 00:11:54,305
rash, skeleton legs,
belly-button bubbles,
230
00:11:54,339 --> 00:11:57,308
"say it don't spray it" disease,
231
00:11:57,342 --> 00:12:01,678
smelly feet, yellow toes,
flaky hair...
232
00:12:01,713 --> 00:12:03,713
Oh, now I know how to shut you up.
233
00:12:03,747 --> 00:12:05,447
...scaly pits... [shuts off]
234
00:12:06,249 --> 00:12:07,282
[laughs]
235
00:12:07,316 --> 00:12:09,249
Knowing stuff is so cool.
236
00:12:16,409 --> 00:12:17,709
What are you doing?
237
00:12:18,044 --> 00:12:20,578
Remember how people loved
the water-fountain water?
238
00:12:20,612 --> 00:12:24,181
I hauled this whole bucket
of it home from school.
239
00:12:24,215 --> 00:12:25,782
Now I'm going to bottle it,
240
00:12:25,817 --> 00:12:27,818
and I'm gonna sell it back to them.
241
00:12:29,588 --> 00:12:31,288
Why are you going
to all this trouble?
242
00:12:31,456 --> 00:12:33,290
Why don't you just
sell them bottled water
243
00:12:33,324 --> 00:12:35,325
and tell them it's
from the fountain?
244
00:12:35,360 --> 00:12:36,827
It all tastes the same.
245
00:12:38,930 --> 00:12:41,666
We know you have a lot of
choices for your fountain water,
246
00:12:41,700 --> 00:12:43,434
and we're glad you chose us.
247
00:12:45,003 --> 00:12:47,004
You guys are waiting in line
to buy this fountain water
248
00:12:47,305 --> 00:12:50,974
because you don't want to wait at the
fountain, meanwhile there's no line at the
fountain.
249
00:12:52,976 --> 00:12:54,576
Hey, hey! There's no line here now.
250
00:12:56,745 --> 00:12:58,446
Hey, guys! When we're
done with these,
251
00:12:58,814 --> 00:13:00,947
we can use our empties to fill
up at the fountain for free.
252
00:13:03,683 --> 00:13:07,853
- We just lost our business.
- What are we going to do?
253
00:13:07,887 --> 00:13:09,453
We gotta come up with something.
254
00:13:09,488 --> 00:13:11,222
Panic and run.
It's never not worked.
255
00:13:20,213 --> 00:13:21,913
Oh my gosh,
256
00:13:21,947 --> 00:13:24,148
this is such a big turnout!
257
00:13:27,952 --> 00:13:31,488
[sighs] I guess there's no point in
waiting around for more people...
258
00:13:33,557 --> 00:13:35,357
OK, calico kittens!
259
00:13:35,392 --> 00:13:40,594
Let's get ready to Qu-izzzzz Bowl!
260
00:13:44,366 --> 00:13:47,468
Quiz Bowl? What are we doing here?
261
00:13:47,502 --> 00:13:48,969
Uh... I, uh...
262
00:13:49,003 --> 00:13:52,604
I just wanted to come by to,
uh, see your poster.
263
00:13:52,639 --> 00:13:54,439
- Really?
- Sure.
264
00:13:58,009 --> 00:14:00,242
[all] One, two, three, win!
265
00:14:02,912 --> 00:14:04,679
Why are you rolling
those stretchies up?
266
00:14:04,713 --> 00:14:06,247
They're cute and really stand out,
267
00:14:06,515 --> 00:14:08,048
which a sign of a
really good stretchy.
268
00:14:08,083 --> 00:14:09,683
Oh! It's just hot in here,
you know?
269
00:14:09,817 --> 00:14:11,585
But, uh, remember,
this isn't about me.
270
00:14:12,320 --> 00:14:15,420
This is about everybody getting to
appreciate you for your brains and not just
your...
271
00:14:15,455 --> 00:14:18,322
- ...oranges.
- [scoffs] They're tangelos!
272
00:14:18,356 --> 00:14:19,956
But, thank you.
273
00:14:19,990 --> 00:14:21,558
Teams ready?
274
00:14:21,592 --> 00:14:23,493
Have some fun, take your time
275
00:14:23,527 --> 00:14:25,461
and remember, there are no losers.
276
00:14:25,562 --> 00:14:28,498
Only winners and the
people that aren't them.
277
00:14:28,532 --> 00:14:29,866
[Justin laughs]
278
00:14:29,901 --> 00:14:32,136
Question number one,
what umbrella term
279
00:14:32,170 --> 00:14:34,539
refers to the diseases of
the heart and blood vessels?
280
00:14:34,574 --> 00:14:35,640
[buzzer clangs]
281
00:14:35,675 --> 00:14:37,375
Cardiovascular disease.
282
00:14:37,409 --> 00:14:39,909
Correct.
283
00:14:43,346 --> 00:14:45,580
Nice, you studied.
284
00:14:45,614 --> 00:14:48,182
Yeah, that's what I did.
285
00:14:48,216 --> 00:14:49,817
Next question.
286
00:14:49,851 --> 00:14:51,852
How many distinct codon
sequences are there
287
00:14:51,887 --> 00:14:54,121
in an RNA messenger molecule?
288
00:14:54,890 --> 00:14:57,191
Eight or two cubed.
289
00:14:57,225 --> 00:14:58,658
[imitates buzzer]
290
00:14:59,960 --> 00:15:01,827
What did we say, Zeke?
291
00:15:01,861 --> 00:15:04,028
"If it's a guess, it's a mess."
292
00:15:06,365 --> 00:15:08,632
Sixty-four or four cubed.
293
00:15:08,666 --> 00:15:12,268
And Bingo was his name-o!
294
00:15:12,302 --> 00:15:15,670
[audience applauds]
295
00:15:15,704 --> 00:15:19,274
You can't see through these cards,
can you, Russo?
296
00:15:21,110 --> 00:15:22,911
Wow. How'd you know that?
297
00:15:23,045 --> 00:15:25,346
You're the one who said I studied.
Why are you asking me?
298
00:15:26,848 --> 00:15:28,915
Mr. Laritate, I should
get credit for this!
299
00:15:28,950 --> 00:15:30,718
She studied off of
my study cards...
300
00:15:30,986 --> 00:15:32,953
OK, look, I think we all
established that I studied.
301
00:15:32,987 --> 00:15:35,022
Mr. Laritate,
question three, please.
302
00:15:36,124 --> 00:15:37,724
Question three...
303
00:15:40,495 --> 00:15:42,229
Archimedes' Principle.
304
00:15:45,433 --> 00:15:50,369
9,476,251 micro-meters...
305
00:15:53,672 --> 00:15:55,072
Puppets.
306
00:15:59,743 --> 00:16:01,777
The Japanese pronunciation is,
307
00:16:01,812 --> 00:16:04,880
Dah-reh-kah ay-ee-goh
gah hah-nah-seh-mas-kah?
308
00:16:10,185 --> 00:16:13,253
My... study... cards.
309
00:16:22,728 --> 00:16:26,229
What are you doing? You answered
every single question in that round.
310
00:16:26,264 --> 00:16:29,131
Isn't that what you wanted?
You're on the winning team.
311
00:16:29,166 --> 00:16:32,501
Strong showing in round one,
Team Maroon.
312
00:16:32,535 --> 00:16:35,303
Or should I say Team Ma-Russo?
313
00:16:35,337 --> 00:16:36,904
[unintelligible]
314
00:16:38,406 --> 00:16:40,340
No, no, no. Please,
don't say Team Russo.
315
00:16:40,508 --> 00:16:43,842
Say Team Harper.
Come on, Harper! Harper! Harper!
316
00:16:43,877 --> 00:16:46,878
Are you kidding me? Would it hurt
you to play along? Really? Really?
317
00:16:48,614 --> 00:16:50,715
Ah, the sweet smell of modesty.
318
00:16:50,749 --> 00:16:53,284
Looks like this isn't your
first rodeo, buckaroo.
319
00:16:53,485 --> 00:16:58,187
You better be careful or you may wind up
with a brand new reputation around here.
320
00:16:58,221 --> 00:17:01,090
And we all know how
hard it is to do that.
321
00:17:02,425 --> 00:17:04,158
Harper, I know you're mad,
I'm sorry,
322
00:17:04,293 --> 00:17:06,127
I'll step back and
let you close it out.
323
00:17:06,161 --> 00:17:08,029
It's much better to be
known as the closer.
324
00:17:08,797 --> 00:17:11,764
Fine. But if I have to go another year
with the same reputation, it's all on you.
325
00:17:15,268 --> 00:17:17,569
That's it. Who else's
study cards are you using?
326
00:17:17,604 --> 00:17:20,472
You answered questions in there that,
that weren't even on mine.
327
00:17:20,506 --> 00:17:22,607
Since when did you become
such a smarty pants?
328
00:17:25,277 --> 00:17:28,012
Smarty Pants! You're totally
wearing Smarty Pants!
329
00:17:28,046 --> 00:17:30,547
I am not.
330
00:17:33,717 --> 00:17:35,851
- I'm telling Mr. Laritate.
- Wait. Wait!
331
00:17:35,886 --> 00:17:38,520
What are you going to tell him?
That I have magic pants?
332
00:17:38,554 --> 00:17:40,188
Yes, I am.
333
00:17:45,059 --> 00:17:47,027
- No, I'm not.
- No, you can't.
334
00:17:48,062 --> 00:17:52,998
[theme music]
335
00:17:54,234 --> 00:17:57,803
Hey, Maxy. How's homework going?
336
00:17:57,837 --> 00:17:59,871
- It's going.
- Enough jibber-jabber.
337
00:18:00,206 --> 00:18:02,907
Let's cut to it. Alfred's Mom
called me and he sang like a canary.
338
00:18:02,941 --> 00:18:05,842
Oh, man! I knew I shouldn't have
taught him that dirty canary song.
339
00:18:05,877 --> 00:18:07,810
[grunts]
340
00:18:07,845 --> 00:18:09,779
Why would you think you
could get away with
341
00:18:09,946 --> 00:18:11,914
selling fountain water
next to the fountain?
342
00:18:12,382 --> 00:18:16,084
I don't know. You buy bottled water
and there's a faucet right over there.
343
00:18:16,118 --> 00:18:19,854
Well, because bottled water
is cleaner and it's portable,
344
00:18:19,888 --> 00:18:22,422
You can take it somewhere and
drink it whenever you want.
345
00:18:22,623 --> 00:18:25,791
Oh. Sort of like those little puppies
that you can fit in your purse?
346
00:18:27,060 --> 00:18:29,726
No, nothing like that.
347
00:18:29,761 --> 00:18:33,129
But come on, they're pretty cute.
348
00:18:33,163 --> 00:18:36,765
Look, if you want to sell something
that people can otherwise get for free,
349
00:18:36,799 --> 00:18:40,003
you have to add something to
it so that it's more valuable.
350
00:18:40,037 --> 00:18:43,973
Valuable, I got it. Thanks, Mom.
351
00:18:44,008 --> 00:18:45,976
You're welcome, sweetie.
352
00:18:46,010 --> 00:18:48,378
Now, let's talk about
this dirty canary song.
353
00:18:48,412 --> 00:18:51,713
Good, because I need a second verse.
Let me go get my songbook.
354
00:19:00,255 --> 00:19:02,522
Thank you, Zeke. Here's your water
355
00:19:02,557 --> 00:19:04,557
and... Alfred!
356
00:19:04,592 --> 00:19:06,259
- [drums on box]
- [puppies whining]
357
00:19:06,294 --> 00:19:08,061
Here's your puppy.
358
00:19:09,997 --> 00:19:11,662
I don't think I want a puppy.
359
00:19:11,963 --> 00:19:14,630
I'm adding value. If you don't
take it, it's a rip-off.
360
00:19:18,434 --> 00:19:20,902
- Get your Puppy Water!
- Get your Puppy Water!
361
00:19:20,936 --> 00:19:23,538
- Get your Puppy Water.
- Water with a puppy!
362
00:19:25,374 --> 00:19:27,108
Question one. Algebra.
363
00:19:27,476 --> 00:19:30,477
What are the polar coordinates of the
point whose Cartesian coordinates are:
364
00:19:30,511 --> 00:19:31,745
Oh-three.
365
00:19:34,415 --> 00:19:35,581
Alex Russo.
366
00:19:35,615 --> 00:19:37,883
Of course, Alex Russo.
367
00:19:37,917 --> 00:19:40,185
Three pi over two.
368
00:19:40,219 --> 00:19:42,687
Yippee pi-ay-yay!
369
00:19:45,691 --> 00:19:47,592
I'm sorry. I can't help it.
370
00:19:47,626 --> 00:19:49,827
Save it. I knew I
couldn't trust you.
371
00:19:49,861 --> 00:19:52,028
All I wanted is to look
smart in front of everyone
372
00:19:52,062 --> 00:19:54,063
and then you,
of all people, show me up.
373
00:19:54,097 --> 00:19:56,765
[Laritate] What is a calorie?
374
00:19:56,799 --> 00:19:58,800
If you answer that, I quit.
375
00:19:58,834 --> 00:20:00,068
I won't answer it.
376
00:20:01,336 --> 00:20:02,836
The amount of energy needed
377
00:20:03,171 --> 00:20:05,739
to raise one cubic centimeter
of water one degree Celsius.
378
00:20:05,773 --> 00:20:06,906
[mouthing] I'm sorry.
379
00:20:06,941 --> 00:20:09,041
Correct!
380
00:20:10,710 --> 00:20:12,878
That's it. I quit.
381
00:20:12,912 --> 00:20:14,546
Wait, Harper...
382
00:20:14,580 --> 00:20:17,482
- No, no! Harper, wait.
- [Laritate] Finkel, Russo.
383
00:20:17,516 --> 00:20:20,885
This is a Quiz Bowl,
not a Drama Bowl.
384
00:20:20,919 --> 00:20:22,920
Let's bring it back into the barn.
385
00:20:22,954 --> 00:20:25,856
- OK. Next question...
- No, wait. Time out. Time out.
386
00:20:25,890 --> 00:20:27,791
Wait, can you call a
time out in a Quiz Bowl?
387
00:20:28,159 --> 00:20:30,427
Not according to the Quiz Bowl rules.
Ask the question!
388
00:20:30,461 --> 00:20:32,930
- She's away from the buzzer!
- I have something to say.
389
00:20:32,964 --> 00:20:37,131
With a 27 point lead,
I will allow the time out.
390
00:20:37,166 --> 00:20:41,401
The rest of this Quiz Bowl
is under protest! - Yeah!
391
00:20:44,004 --> 00:20:47,873
The only reason why I did this whole
Quiz Bowl thing was to help out a friend.
392
00:20:48,942 --> 00:20:51,543
I'm not going to
let my friend down.
393
00:20:51,577 --> 00:20:53,778
I'll do whatever it takes...
394
00:20:53,812 --> 00:20:56,180
... no matter how
embarrassing it is.
395
00:20:56,214 --> 00:20:58,816
Some of you may not want to look.
396
00:20:58,850 --> 00:21:03,420
Hey, Dean. She's taking her
pants off. Should we look?
397
00:21:04,388 --> 00:21:06,155
No.
398
00:21:11,160 --> 00:21:12,461
[both gasp]
399
00:21:13,963 --> 00:21:16,764
Alex! You kept the
pants on too long!
400
00:21:16,799 --> 00:21:19,433
- What?
- Skeleton legs!
401
00:21:21,001 --> 00:21:23,869
Was that on the list of side
effects that I didn't listen to?
402
00:21:25,771 --> 00:21:29,006
Well, when in doubt,
dance out, huh?
403
00:21:29,041 --> 00:21:31,608
- OK.
- [bones clacking]
404
00:21:33,878 --> 00:21:36,913
- [Alex] This is good.
- Come on!
405
00:21:48,167 --> 00:21:51,068
Thank you, Alex. After you left,
Nellie stepped back in.
406
00:21:51,103 --> 00:21:53,370
And I brought it home
in a real nail biter.
407
00:21:53,404 --> 00:21:56,706
Wow, so you won.
I never would have guessed.
408
00:21:58,208 --> 00:21:59,541
I owe you big time.
409
00:21:59,642 --> 00:22:01,543
And I was thinking,
a skeleton shirt
410
00:22:01,577 --> 00:22:03,578
to go with those skeleton tights.
411
00:22:03,612 --> 00:22:05,613
Yes! Skeleton tights.
412
00:22:05,647 --> 00:22:08,382
That's totally believable.
Spread that around. Please.
413
00:22:09,983 --> 00:22:12,719
Mom, how'd it go?
Am I in big trouble?
414
00:22:12,753 --> 00:22:15,155
It's weird. Your principal
started to talk about you,
415
00:22:15,189 --> 00:22:17,624
and then he got a phone call
about some dirty canary song
416
00:22:17,658 --> 00:22:20,059
sweeping through the seventh grade.
417
00:22:20,093 --> 00:22:21,793
Uh, Mom, I think Max was the...
418
00:22:21,827 --> 00:22:23,061
Shh. Let's get out of here.
419
00:22:23,062 --> 00:22:31,062
Sync by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com