1
00:00:05,083 --> 00:00:08,708
Do you see Mason anywhere?
Every day this week he's
accidentally run into me

2
00:00:08,708 --> 00:00:12,083
as I was getting on the
elevator, to talk about us
getting back together, again.

3
00:00:12,083 --> 00:00:14,000
Maybe he's hiding...

4
00:00:14,000 --> 00:00:17,708
...from these fresh,
delicious T-bone steaks!

5
00:00:19,000 --> 00:00:21,583
- No, he's not here.
- [elevator dings]

6
00:00:23,458 --> 00:00:27,958
Stick me with a spur,
it's Russo and Finkle!

7
00:00:29,291 --> 00:00:31,583
What are you two doing
in my building?

8
00:00:32,625 --> 00:00:34,166
We live here,
right up on the...

9
00:00:34,166 --> 00:00:36,291
No, we, uh, don't, Harper.

10
00:00:36,291 --> 00:00:39,750
Our building just
looks like this building.

11
00:00:39,750 --> 00:00:41,958
Oh. Right.

12
00:00:44,958 --> 00:00:47,958
Yeah, and sometimes we
confuse it with this one,

13
00:00:47,958 --> 00:00:50,208
in case you ever
see us here again.

14
00:00:51,291 --> 00:00:52,958
We just came by
to say hello.

15
00:00:52,958 --> 00:00:55,250
Hello.

16
00:00:55,250 --> 00:00:56,291
And goodbye.

17
00:00:56,291 --> 00:00:59,416
Then why do you
have groceries?

18
00:00:59,416 --> 00:01:03,000
Well... they're gifts.
For you.

19
00:01:05,125 --> 00:01:07,166
Odd gift choice, Russo.

20
00:01:08,625 --> 00:01:12,166
T-bone steaks!
My favorite cut of the cow!

21
00:01:13,416 --> 00:01:15,875
Tell you what? Why don't you
come on up for a visit?

22
00:01:15,875 --> 00:01:20,375
We'd love to Mr. Laritate.
We have to go buy those
exact same gifts for us.

23
00:01:21,958 --> 00:01:24,708
No, I insist. Come on up
and I'll show you how to keep

24
00:01:24,708 --> 00:01:26,458
a Shetland pony as a pet...

25
00:01:28,625 --> 00:01:30,458
...without anyone knowing.

26
00:01:31,875 --> 00:01:33,375
I don't know.

27
00:01:33,375 --> 00:01:34,750
Are you gonna ride it?

28
00:01:34,750 --> 00:01:37,375
"Am I going to ride it?"

29
00:01:37,375 --> 00:01:39,083
I'm gonna jump the couch!

30
00:01:40,708 --> 00:01:42,333
Well, we have to see that.

31
00:01:45,708 --> 00:01:48,416
Oh, no. Uh, uh...
The elevator just broke.

32
00:01:48,416 --> 00:01:50,208
That's funny, I was just on it.

33
00:01:50,208 --> 00:01:53,458
Shh, I won't tell
anyone you did it.

34
00:01:54,833 --> 00:01:56,708
All right, we're gonna have to
hoof it up the stairs.

35
00:01:56,708 --> 00:01:58,875
We can rest halfway.

36
00:01:58,875 --> 00:02:01,958
I live all the way up
on the second floor.

37
00:02:05,291 --> 00:02:11,208
♪ Everything is not
what it seems ♪

38
00:02:11,208 --> 00:02:13,375
♪ Well, you know everything's
gonna be a breeze ♪

39
00:02:13,375 --> 00:02:15,166
♪ That the end will no doubt
justify the means ♪

40
00:02:15,166 --> 00:02:17,583
♪ You can fix any problem
with the slightest of ease ♪

41
00:02:17,583 --> 00:02:19,000
♪ Yes, please ♪

42
00:02:19,000 --> 00:02:20,875
♪ But you might find out
it'll go to your head ♪

43
00:02:20,875 --> 00:02:22,833
♪ When you write a report
on a book you never read ♪

44
00:02:22,833 --> 00:02:25,416
♪ With the snap of your fingers
you can make your bed ♪

45
00:02:25,416 --> 00:02:26,875
♪ That's what I said ♪

46
00:02:26,875 --> 00:02:30,000
♪ Everything is not
what it seems ♪

47
00:02:30,000 --> 00:02:33,875
♪ When you can get all you
wanted in your wildest dreams ♪

48
00:02:33,875 --> 00:02:37,875
♪ You might run into trouble
if you go to extremes ♪

49
00:02:37,875 --> 00:02:42,250
♪ Because everything
is not what it seems ♪

50
00:02:42,250 --> 00:02:45,375
♪ Be careful not to mess
with the balance of things ♪

51
00:02:45,375 --> 00:02:49,333
♪ Because everything is not ♪

52
00:02:49,333 --> 00:02:51,583
♪ What it seems ♪♪

53
00:02:55,375 --> 00:02:58,583
Ha-Ha-ha!
It's here! It's here!

54
00:02:58,583 --> 00:03:00,750
Oh, I got it!

55
00:03:00,750 --> 00:03:03,458
El Chile Diablo.

56
00:03:03,458 --> 00:03:05,750
From the jungles
of South America.

57
00:03:05,750 --> 00:03:09,750
I'm gonna make chili
for this year's Waverly
Place Frontier Days.

58
00:03:09,750 --> 00:03:12,458
It's gonna have people
coming back to the
Sub Station for more.

59
00:03:12,458 --> 00:03:15,000
Isn't that what our
sandwiches are supposed to do?

60
00:03:16,333 --> 00:03:18,750
Yeah well, that ship
sailed years ago.

61
00:03:18,750 --> 00:03:23,625
A good, spicy chili is gonna
make this place memorable.

62
00:03:23,625 --> 00:03:26,000
OK, well whatever you
do, just be careful,

63
00:03:26,000 --> 00:03:28,500
'cause those are superhot,
they'll burn your skin
on contact.

64
00:03:28,500 --> 00:03:32,583
Oh, please. Justin, I know how
to handle a little chili pepper.

65
00:03:34,250 --> 00:03:35,833
Mr. Justin...
Hey, Mr. Justin's dad.

66
00:03:35,833 --> 00:03:38,708
- [sizzling]
- [screaming]

67
00:03:40,875 --> 00:03:43,333
It's touching my skin!

68
00:03:43,333 --> 00:03:45,208
It's burning!

69
00:03:46,291 --> 00:03:48,375
[screams]

70
00:03:48,375 --> 00:03:50,333
I'm on fire!

71
00:03:50,333 --> 00:03:51,875
It's always good
to see your dad.

72
00:03:51,875 --> 00:03:55,583
Mr. Justin,
I need your help.

73
00:03:55,583 --> 00:03:58,875
You know something?
I've been secretly
hoping the day would come

74
00:03:58,875 --> 00:04:02,875
when one of my former
students came to me and
asked me for my guidance.

75
00:04:02,875 --> 00:04:05,333
I'm touched.
What do you need, friend?

76
00:04:05,333 --> 00:04:08,708
- I think I broke my wand.
- You idiot!

77
00:04:08,708 --> 00:04:11,416
That's the most powerful wand
in the wizard world!

78
00:04:11,416 --> 00:04:13,583
I don't know what happened.
I went to bed last night
and it was fine.

79
00:04:13,583 --> 00:04:15,583
When I woke up this morning,
it wasn't working.

80
00:04:17,083 --> 00:04:19,125
- It's a fake.
- How can you tell?

81
00:04:19,125 --> 00:04:22,958
I don't know a wizard wand
that takes double-A batteries.

82
00:04:25,208 --> 00:04:28,166
- Well, then where's my wand?
- I hate to say this, Felix,

83
00:04:28,166 --> 00:04:31,208
but I think someone switched
this fake wand with your wand,

84
00:04:31,208 --> 00:04:33,291
the most powerful wand
in the wizard world.

85
00:04:33,291 --> 00:04:37,125
No! Why would somebody
do something like that?

86
00:04:37,125 --> 00:04:40,708
Hmm. I don't know, maybe
because it's the most powerful
wand in the wizard world!

87
00:04:42,416 --> 00:04:44,708
And this is the lounge area.

88
00:04:44,708 --> 00:04:47,125
Now, we don't have
a lot of zombies here,

89
00:04:47,125 --> 00:04:50,958
so I'm gonna have to ask you
to clean up any rotting flesh
you leave behind.

90
00:04:50,958 --> 00:04:53,125
[grunting in agreement]

91
00:04:53,125 --> 00:04:57,833
Oh, hey girls. This is
Abercrombie Zombie,
your new neighbor.

92
00:04:57,833 --> 00:05:00,583
[chuckling] He's "dying"
to live here.

93
00:05:02,708 --> 00:05:05,500
It's... a zombie.
Oh, I'm terrible at jokes.

94
00:05:07,375 --> 00:05:09,416
Oh, hi, it's nice
to meet you...

95
00:05:09,416 --> 00:05:11,875
Oh, my gosh!
I'm so sorry!

96
00:05:11,875 --> 00:05:14,166
[grunting]

97
00:05:14,166 --> 00:05:16,875
He says it's OK.
It happens all the time.

98
00:05:16,875 --> 00:05:19,625
- You can speak Zombie?
- It's called "Zombish."

99
00:05:19,625 --> 00:05:22,000
Every wizard learns it
when they're little.

100
00:05:22,000 --> 00:05:25,125
[enthusiastic moaning]

101
00:05:30,750 --> 00:05:33,333
He says your brains
smell cute and tasty.

102
00:05:33,333 --> 00:05:36,458
Oh. Why, thank you.

103
00:05:39,125 --> 00:05:42,833
Um... Why don't I show you
the laundry room?

104
00:05:42,833 --> 00:05:45,583
Now, no offense...

105
00:05:45,583 --> 00:05:48,958
...but you might want to throw
in a load as soon as possible.

106
00:05:48,958 --> 00:05:50,583
[elevator dings]

107
00:05:54,708 --> 00:05:56,125
Hi, Alex.

108
00:05:57,958 --> 00:06:00,583
I have not been sitting here
waiting for you all day.

109
00:06:00,583 --> 00:06:02,500
Why would you accuse me
of such a thing?

110
00:06:03,958 --> 00:06:06,000
I haven't even
said anything yet.

111
00:06:06,000 --> 00:06:09,583
Oh, gravy boat! I skipped ahead
on my rehearsed encounter
with you.

112
00:06:11,000 --> 00:06:14,625
This is gonna be another awkward
relationship talk, isn't it?

113
00:06:14,625 --> 00:06:18,208
You know what?
I'm just gonna stay here.

114
00:06:18,208 --> 00:06:21,583
Wha...? Don't you leave me
alone with him, Harper Finkle!

115
00:06:23,250 --> 00:06:24,458
Hi, Mason.

116
00:06:24,458 --> 00:06:26,708
Alex, I've made a list
of the pros and cons

117
00:06:26,708 --> 00:06:28,958
of us getting back together.

118
00:06:28,958 --> 00:06:31,875
Well, I mean, I listed the pros.
There were no cons.

119
00:06:31,875 --> 00:06:35,166
Sh! Mason, quiet down.
This is my jam.

120
00:06:35,166 --> 00:06:37,000
[soft elevator music playing]

121
00:06:37,000 --> 00:06:38,458
Alex, please.
Listen to me.

122
00:06:38,458 --> 00:06:40,375
This time in the elevator
is the only one-on-one time

123
00:06:40,375 --> 00:06:43,250
- I get to spend with you.
-♪ Do, do, do, doo, do, do ♪

124
00:06:43,250 --> 00:06:45,500
Alex, please, listen to me!

125
00:06:46,958 --> 00:06:48,375
Mason, what
are you doing?

126
00:06:48,375 --> 00:06:50,875
I'm trying to stop us, so I can
get a few minutes with you.

127
00:06:50,875 --> 00:06:53,083
Stop it, you're
gonna break it!

128
00:06:54,583 --> 00:06:57,375
- [elevator stops]
- Like that.

129
00:07:03,125 --> 00:07:05,708
- Hello!
- Hello.

130
00:07:05,708 --> 00:07:08,458
The elevator works perfectly.

131
00:07:08,458 --> 00:07:10,625
If it doesn't, I had
nothing to do with it.

132
00:07:10,625 --> 00:07:13,375
What are you talking about?

133
00:07:13,375 --> 00:07:15,000
Um, I think that's
a little personal.

134
00:07:15,000 --> 00:07:16,500
- Run!
- Yeah.

135
00:07:17,583 --> 00:07:19,458
How rude.

136
00:07:19,458 --> 00:07:22,833
That's why I refuse
to see my grandchildren.

137
00:07:25,708 --> 00:07:27,750
That's strange.

138
00:07:27,750 --> 00:07:31,416
Since when did this building
get a 13th floor?

139
00:07:41,458 --> 00:07:43,000
Check your pockets again.

140
00:07:44,625 --> 00:07:47,166
- Nope. Still gone.
- [door opens]

141
00:07:47,166 --> 00:07:51,583
OK. here's the first batch
of Chili Diablo.

142
00:07:51,583 --> 00:07:55,416
- Who wants to try?
- Not now, Dad.
We have a big problem.

143
00:07:55,416 --> 00:07:57,208
Felix's wand is missing.

144
00:07:57,208 --> 00:08:01,250
Oh. Have you tried
the Abraca-doodler's
Wand Locator App?

145
00:08:01,250 --> 00:08:03,750
See, every wand
has a security beacon

146
00:08:03,750 --> 00:08:06,583
that shows you its
exact location on a map.

147
00:08:06,583 --> 00:08:09,000
Felix, just punch in
your security code.

148
00:08:10,750 --> 00:08:12,583
[beeping]

149
00:08:14,250 --> 00:08:16,625
Oh, great, my wand
is still in New York.

150
00:08:16,625 --> 00:08:18,625
It's moving around
the building like it's flying.

151
00:08:18,625 --> 00:08:22,708
Ooh, or the building
is flying around the wand.

152
00:08:24,708 --> 00:08:27,208
Yeah, you're right,
it's probably the wand.

153
00:08:29,000 --> 00:08:31,708
Something's weird.
I'm calling Professor Crumbs.

154
00:08:31,708 --> 00:08:33,416
Good idea.

155
00:08:35,416 --> 00:08:37,833
Are you sure you guys
don't want to try the chili?

156
00:08:43,416 --> 00:08:45,125
[shrieks]

157
00:08:53,208 --> 00:08:56,333
- What's going on?
- The 13th floor
button was exposed

158
00:08:56,333 --> 00:08:57,833
and the non-wizard tenants
have been coming up.

159
00:08:57,833 --> 00:08:59,875
- What are we gonna do?
- Oh, no.

160
00:08:59,875 --> 00:09:02,000
I bet it happened when
you banged on the buttons.

161
00:09:02,000 --> 00:09:05,291
Don't try to pin this on me.
I just wanted to talk about
our relationship.

162
00:09:05,291 --> 00:09:08,333
Excuse me. We all came
up here to find out

163
00:09:08,333 --> 00:09:12,083
where this mysterious
13th floor came from.

164
00:09:12,083 --> 00:09:15,125
And who is that stinky freak

165
00:09:15,125 --> 00:09:18,500
grunting in the corner? Whoo!

166
00:09:18,500 --> 00:09:21,458
[dismissive grunt]

167
00:09:21,458 --> 00:09:26,208
What have you done? Exposing
this floor could ruin my plans!

168
00:09:26,208 --> 00:09:28,625
- What plans?
- Oh, it's all falling apart!

169
00:09:30,458 --> 00:09:33,416
Dexter, calm down.
I'll handle this.

170
00:09:36,250 --> 00:09:38,708
OK! Everybody,
listen up. Um...

171
00:09:38,708 --> 00:09:42,000
There is a simple
explanation for all of this.

172
00:09:44,458 --> 00:09:47,875
You accidentally discovered
the secret haunted house

173
00:09:47,875 --> 00:09:50,958
that Dexter has been planning
for all of you. You spoiled it!

174
00:09:53,250 --> 00:09:54,750
I hope you're happy.

175
00:09:56,458 --> 00:09:59,166
I love a good
haunted house.

176
00:09:59,166 --> 00:10:01,583
I hope they have
a costume contest.

177
00:10:01,583 --> 00:10:04,375
I still fit into
my saucy kitty outfit.

178
00:10:06,708 --> 00:10:09,833
OK, everyone, please
forget you ever saw this,

179
00:10:09,833 --> 00:10:12,083
and do not tell anyone.

180
00:10:12,083 --> 00:10:15,875
OK, Dexter. We don't want
to spoil the surprise.

181
00:10:15,875 --> 00:10:18,000
- Let's go, everybody.
- Yeah, that's right.

182
00:10:18,000 --> 00:10:22,250
Everybody out! Keep your arms,
legs, feet, hands and toes
inside the elevator.

183
00:10:22,250 --> 00:10:24,250
And just ignore that little
13th floor button.

184
00:10:24,250 --> 00:10:26,583
Yeah, uh-huh,
thank you. Buh-bye.

185
00:10:32,416 --> 00:10:35,708
I'm sorry, Dexter. I'll be
very careful with the elevator
buttons from now on.

186
00:10:36,625 --> 00:10:38,000
You better.

187
00:10:38,000 --> 00:10:40,875
Because of you, I gotta
make plans for a haunted house.

188
00:10:43,958 --> 00:10:47,458
All right, you guys better
fix the elevator before
somebody else comes up.

189
00:10:47,458 --> 00:10:49,250
[elevator dings]

190
00:10:50,750 --> 00:10:52,083
Of course.

191
00:10:53,583 --> 00:10:55,583
Finkle? Russo?

192
00:10:55,583 --> 00:10:57,166
The British buckaroo?

193
00:10:57,166 --> 00:10:59,750
Mr. Laritate, why are you
dressed like that?

194
00:11:00,958 --> 00:11:03,625
For the Frontier Days
square dance.

195
00:11:03,625 --> 00:11:05,458
The big question is...

196
00:11:05,458 --> 00:11:09,958
what are you all doing
on this mysterious 13th floor?

197
00:11:09,958 --> 00:11:14,375
You know, I've spent years
thinking there was something
strange about you, Russo.

198
00:11:14,375 --> 00:11:17,291
Now I see you with...
Zombie Guy, and...

199
00:11:18,583 --> 00:11:20,458
...Weird Ears...

200
00:11:20,458 --> 00:11:22,708
... hands out of
a trash chute!

201
00:11:24,833 --> 00:11:27,875
[stammering] Yes, because
this is a haunted house.

202
00:11:27,875 --> 00:11:30,583
Haunted house, my caboose.

203
00:11:30,583 --> 00:11:36,000
It's more like a weird,
parallel magic universe,

204
00:11:36,000 --> 00:11:38,708
and you're somehow a part of it.

205
00:11:39,875 --> 00:11:41,500
He's onto us.
Somebody do something.

206
00:11:42,583 --> 00:11:45,083
- [growls]
- [screams]

207
00:11:46,583 --> 00:11:48,458
Abercrombie, what did you do?

208
00:11:52,125 --> 00:11:54,291
- [moaning]
- Mr. Laritate, are you OK?

209
00:11:55,250 --> 00:11:58,083
[grunting]

210
00:12:03,583 --> 00:12:07,166
You should never say,
"Somebody do something,"
with a zombie in the room.

211
00:12:18,750 --> 00:12:21,375
Hurry up and find
a spell that will
turn Mr. Laritate back.

212
00:12:21,375 --> 00:12:23,000
I'm running out
of bathroom spray.

213
00:12:23,000 --> 00:12:24,708
Will you put that away, Harper?

214
00:12:24,708 --> 00:12:27,208
It smells like a springtime
fresh cemetery in here.

215
00:12:27,208 --> 00:12:28,583
[snarls]

216
00:12:34,416 --> 00:12:36,375
We need more than
a first aid kit.

217
00:12:36,375 --> 00:12:38,375
He's a sneeze away
from losing his face.

218
00:12:38,375 --> 00:12:39,625
[urgent grunting]

219
00:12:41,291 --> 00:12:42,458
Wait, it's zombie bite ointment.

220
00:12:42,458 --> 00:12:44,000
Excellent. This should
change him back.

221
00:12:44,000 --> 00:12:47,875
Perfect, we'll just
slap some of this goop
on old Laritate and...

222
00:12:47,875 --> 00:12:49,958
Where's Zombie Laritate?

223
00:12:53,500 --> 00:12:55,250
He's gone.
We have to go find him!

224
00:12:55,250 --> 00:12:57,000
Where would
Zombie Laritate go?

225
00:12:57,000 --> 00:12:59,375
Oh! The Waverly Place
Frontier Days.

226
00:12:59,375 --> 00:13:02,416
Even as a zombie,
Laritate wouldn't miss
a good square dance.

227
00:13:02,416 --> 00:13:04,250
Oh, right, let's go.

228
00:13:04,250 --> 00:13:08,083
Uh, you... stay here and
think about what you did.

229
00:13:08,083 --> 00:13:10,125
You're a bad zombie. Bad!

230
00:13:26,500 --> 00:13:29,333
Professor Crumbs,
what are you doing?

231
00:13:29,333 --> 00:13:32,000
I'm looking to see
how big my eye can be.

232
00:13:35,125 --> 00:13:38,583
Felix, when was the last
time you used your wand?

233
00:13:38,583 --> 00:13:42,291
I used it last night in my
apartment to clip my toenails.

234
00:13:42,291 --> 00:13:45,291
You used the most powerful
wand in the wizard world

235
00:13:45,291 --> 00:13:47,583
to clip your toenails?!

236
00:13:47,583 --> 00:13:51,000
Well, the wand
clips them very evenly.

237
00:13:51,000 --> 00:13:53,625
Felix, I didn't know
you had your own apartment.

238
00:13:53,625 --> 00:13:56,333
Mm-hm. I live on the wizard
floor, down at the Windsor.

239
00:13:56,333 --> 00:13:59,833
Impossible. There are no
wizard floors at the Windsor.

240
00:13:59,833 --> 00:14:01,708
Yeah, there is. I live right
across the hall from Alex.

241
00:14:01,708 --> 00:14:02,958
A bunch of wizards live there.

242
00:14:02,958 --> 00:14:06,000
You didn't know
about the wizard floor?

243
00:14:06,000 --> 00:14:08,291
I'm starting to get
a bad feeling about this,
Professor Crumbs.

244
00:14:08,291 --> 00:14:12,208
Indeed. We'd better
investigate that wizard floor.

245
00:14:12,208 --> 00:14:13,583
OK, but before you do,

246
00:14:13,583 --> 00:14:15,583
could you guys flash me in,
like, five minutes before you,

247
00:14:15,583 --> 00:14:17,458
so I can pick my undies
up off the floor?

248
00:14:17,458 --> 00:14:21,166
Ladies and gentlemen, the keeper
of the most powerful wand
in the wizard world.

249
00:14:26,625 --> 00:14:28,333
♪ Bow to your rooster ♪

250
00:14:28,333 --> 00:14:30,500
♪ Then bow to your hen ♪

251
00:14:30,500 --> 00:14:33,000
♪ And cluck with the chickens
in the big ol' pen ♪

252
00:14:33,000 --> 00:14:36,125
♪ Do the right hand first ♪

253
00:14:36,125 --> 00:14:37,875
♪ Then left hand through ♪

254
00:14:37,875 --> 00:14:39,583
Whoa!

255
00:14:39,583 --> 00:14:42,416
Whoa, Herschel, are you OK?

256
00:14:42,416 --> 00:14:45,000
You don't look so good.

257
00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:47,208
You're attracting flies!

258
00:14:47,208 --> 00:14:51,708
Um... Good zombie cowboy
costume, Mr. Laritate!

259
00:14:51,708 --> 00:14:55,250
Yeah. A clever twist on
a stale Western tradition.

260
00:14:55,250 --> 00:14:58,833
Oh, zombie cowboy, I see!

261
00:14:58,833 --> 00:15:01,000
Always keeping it fresh,
huh, Herschel?

262
00:15:02,958 --> 00:15:05,375
♪ Raise your gal up
off the ground ♪

263
00:15:05,375 --> 00:15:07,125
♪ Now, watch your step
There's chickens around ♪

264
00:15:07,125 --> 00:15:09,458
- Alex, what did you do?
- It's OK, Dad.

265
00:15:09,458 --> 00:15:12,250
Mason's going to rub some
zombie bite ointment on him.

266
00:15:12,250 --> 00:15:14,333
I never agreed
to the rubbing.

267
00:15:16,583 --> 00:15:19,458
You can't do it now.
Everyone will see
the transformation.

268
00:15:19,458 --> 00:15:21,416
Well, maybe we can get him
into the Sub Station.

269
00:15:21,416 --> 00:15:24,000
That's usually pretty empty.

270
00:15:24,000 --> 00:15:26,583
That's a good idea, Harper.
Let's go get him.

271
00:15:26,583 --> 00:15:29,708
Folks, let's give
a big ol' "Yee-haw"

272
00:15:29,708 --> 00:15:32,333
to the young'uns
joining our shindig!

273
00:15:32,333 --> 00:15:34,166
[all] Yee-haw!

274
00:15:34,166 --> 00:15:36,583
No, no, no, no, no, no,
we're just getting our friend.

275
00:15:36,583 --> 00:15:40,166
No, no, no. No one steps
on my floor without dancin'.

276
00:15:40,166 --> 00:15:43,583
Now, keep up, 'cause
Everett slows down his
do-si-dos for nobody.

277
00:15:43,583 --> 00:15:45,875
See how fast I said "do-si-dos"?

278
00:15:48,583 --> 00:15:50,291
Five, six, seven, eight...

279
00:15:50,291 --> 00:15:52,416
♪ Circle to the left
around you now ♪

280
00:15:54,208 --> 00:15:56,458
♪ Circle to the right
like you're herding a cow ♪

281
00:15:58,583 --> 00:16:00,875
Hey, look at me,
I'm square dancin'!

282
00:16:00,875 --> 00:16:03,625
♪ Do-si-do, then
stack that wood ♪

283
00:16:03,625 --> 00:16:06,458
And I'm a British guy
square dancin'!

284
00:16:06,458 --> 00:16:09,291
♪ Now swing that gal
like you know you should ♪

285
00:16:09,291 --> 00:16:10,833
Yee-haw!

286
00:16:10,833 --> 00:16:13,875
-♪ Allemande left ♪
- We're pretty good
at this, huh?

287
00:16:13,875 --> 00:16:16,958
Oop! Sorry,
maybe not so good.

288
00:16:16,958 --> 00:16:20,583
- I got you.
-♪ Everyone now be friends
in the middle ♪

289
00:16:20,583 --> 00:16:22,875
-♪ And carry your plates... ♪
- Guys! Focus!

290
00:16:22,875 --> 00:16:24,958
Zombie 'Tate is
creeping people out!

291
00:16:27,583 --> 00:16:30,333
Um... Do the one where
they switch partners!

292
00:16:30,333 --> 00:16:32,958
Whoo! Looks like
we got a fan, folks!

293
00:16:32,958 --> 00:16:35,083
Five, six, seven, eight!

294
00:16:35,083 --> 00:16:37,125
♪ Into the middle
where it's stock the hay ♪

295
00:16:38,708 --> 00:16:42,000
♪ Then trade your partner
in a right-hand way ♪

296
00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:44,458
♪ Now, grab that lady
by the arm ♪

297
00:16:45,958 --> 00:16:47,708
♪ And show her around
that great big farm ♪

298
00:16:47,708 --> 00:16:49,125
♪ There's a horse, there's a
cow, there's a chicken... ♪

299
00:16:49,125 --> 00:16:50,875
Uh-oh.

300
00:16:50,875 --> 00:16:54,958
Uh... FreeEl DiabloChili
to all square dancers!

301
00:16:54,958 --> 00:16:57,458
What? Free? I paid 300
dollars for that pepper!

302
00:16:57,458 --> 00:17:02,125
- I need a distraction.
- El Diablo? Sounds exotic.

303
00:17:02,125 --> 00:17:04,333
I gotta try me some of that.

304
00:17:06,750 --> 00:17:09,333
Oh! My eyes are burning!

305
00:17:09,333 --> 00:17:13,125
It's a Diablo!
It's too spicy!

306
00:17:13,125 --> 00:17:14,625
Go, Alex, go!

307
00:17:17,625 --> 00:17:20,458
- [Laritate groaning]
- [Alex] It's OK, zombie.

308
00:17:20,458 --> 00:17:23,500
- [growls]
- It's just medicine.
We're helping you.

309
00:17:26,458 --> 00:17:27,958
[moans]

310
00:17:33,958 --> 00:17:36,291
Where am I?
What happened?

311
00:17:36,291 --> 00:17:39,291
That depends.
What do you remember last?

312
00:17:40,708 --> 00:17:42,500
I was in my
apartment building...

313
00:17:42,500 --> 00:17:44,583
Great. We'll
start there. Um...

314
00:17:44,583 --> 00:17:47,625
We found you wandering
around your building.

315
00:17:47,625 --> 00:17:51,458
Yes, and you were
sick and out of it.

316
00:17:51,458 --> 00:17:53,708
Do you remember any
of this, Mr. Laritate?

317
00:17:53,708 --> 00:17:56,583
I was on my way
to Frontier Days...

318
00:17:56,583 --> 00:17:59,250
Yes, yes!
Yes, and you are here!

319
00:17:59,250 --> 00:18:02,083
So why don't you get out there
and start square dancing?

320
00:18:02,083 --> 00:18:04,583
Land sakes, they've
already started?!

321
00:18:04,583 --> 00:18:07,458
I hope they haven't danced
the Topeka Two Step yet.

322
00:18:07,458 --> 00:18:10,125
That's my big finishing move.

323
00:18:11,458 --> 00:18:15,000
There you go.
Yee-haw, Laritate!

324
00:18:17,000 --> 00:18:18,875
That man loves
to square dance.

325
00:18:18,875 --> 00:18:20,875
I'd have to say
I quite enjoyed it as well.

326
00:18:22,125 --> 00:18:24,750
Well, maybe because you
had such a good partner.

327
00:18:25,708 --> 00:18:28,083
I did.

328
00:18:28,083 --> 00:18:29,416
Listen, Alex...

329
00:18:31,458 --> 00:18:33,875
I know I'm caught up
in the moment, and you
don't want to hear this...

330
00:18:37,875 --> 00:18:42,458
Oh. I was just gonna talk
about our relationship.

331
00:18:42,458 --> 00:18:44,000
Not that I didn't
love that...

332
00:18:44,833 --> 00:18:46,458
...a lot, actually.

333
00:18:47,708 --> 00:18:49,875
But wait, what happened
to us being just friends?

334
00:18:51,625 --> 00:18:55,000
Well, running around
with you today

335
00:18:55,000 --> 00:18:56,458
made me realize
something.

336
00:18:58,000 --> 00:19:00,500
We can't stay broken up.

337
00:19:00,500 --> 00:19:02,333
We're too good together.

338
00:19:05,750 --> 00:19:08,000
Yippie-ki-ay!

339
00:19:09,708 --> 00:19:12,250
And now we're
broken up again.

340
00:19:15,875 --> 00:19:17,583
I don't understand.

341
00:19:17,583 --> 00:19:21,750
According to my records,
this floor should not exist.

342
00:19:23,500 --> 00:19:24,583
[grunting]

343
00:19:24,583 --> 00:19:26,333
No, I don't want
to be your roommate!

344
00:19:26,333 --> 00:19:27,625
[bell dings]

345
00:19:29,333 --> 00:19:33,583
Good news, everybody. Mason
and I are back together. Yay!

346
00:19:35,375 --> 00:19:39,083
Why is nobody clapping?
I won't be walking the
hallways moping anymore.

347
00:19:42,083 --> 00:19:44,208
Justin, what are you
doing here?

348
00:19:44,208 --> 00:19:48,625
Professor Crumbs thinks
we should all leave.
Like, right now.

349
00:19:48,625 --> 00:19:51,291
Yes. It would be in
everyone's best interest

350
00:19:51,291 --> 00:19:54,125
to get as far away
from this place as possible.

351
00:19:54,125 --> 00:19:56,708
I sense a great evil
at work here.

352
00:19:56,708 --> 00:19:59,208
I know this is getting
a little long-winded,

353
00:19:59,208 --> 00:20:03,166
but I can't stress enough
that we have to get
out of this building.

354
00:20:03,166 --> 00:20:04,625
[elevator dings]

355
00:20:07,208 --> 00:20:09,000
He's an Angel of Darkness!

356
00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:12,000
That's right. And I'm here
to collect your rent.

357
00:20:13,833 --> 00:20:15,708
Just kidding.
You can keep the rent.

358
00:20:18,375 --> 00:20:22,000
- That's Felix's wand!
You stole Felix's wand!
- It was you?

359
00:20:22,000 --> 00:20:27,125
Felix, you can have your wand
back and so much more if you
do what I ask of you.

360
00:20:27,125 --> 00:20:29,500
Don't you want your wand back?

361
00:20:29,500 --> 00:20:32,375
Without it, you're just
another delinquent.

362
00:20:35,833 --> 00:20:37,875
[groaning]

363
00:20:40,875 --> 00:20:44,375
- Felix, what are you doing?
- I'm joining the dark side.

364
00:20:45,208 --> 00:20:47,958
Felix, do this spell

365
00:20:47,958 --> 00:20:50,083
my robot stole
from the Russos' Lair.

366
00:20:50,083 --> 00:20:51,875
That was your robot?

367
00:20:51,875 --> 00:20:53,875
Felix, don't do it.
Be strong!

368
00:20:53,875 --> 00:20:57,958
Make these troubles no more,
go in through the out door.

369
00:20:59,458 --> 00:21:01,625
OK. come on, everybody.
We've gotta get out of here.

370
00:21:03,458 --> 00:21:05,208
[exhaling]

371
00:21:08,708 --> 00:21:10,000
Let's take the stairs!

372
00:21:14,750 --> 00:21:16,208
[elevator dings]

373
00:21:20,000 --> 00:21:21,833
It's no use, Justin.

374
00:21:21,833 --> 00:21:24,458
He cast the "In Through
the Out Door" spell.

375
00:21:25,458 --> 00:21:27,083
We're all trapped here?

376
00:21:27,083 --> 00:21:30,416
Yes you are. [cackling]

377
00:21:33,625 --> 00:21:36,291
Never mind.
Just look at the evil wings.

378
00:21:39,000 --> 00:21:41,833
[upbeat music playing]

379
00:21:44,708 --> 00:21:46,875
♪ Grab that partner
Don't be tense ♪

380
00:21:48,500 --> 00:21:50,500
♪ Move in a way
that makes no sense ♪

381
00:21:52,375 --> 00:21:55,875
Free chili!
Get your free chili!

382
00:21:55,875 --> 00:21:58,583
I'd love a free
bowl of chili.

383
00:21:58,583 --> 00:22:02,083
The lifeblood of
the American plains people.

384
00:22:02,083 --> 00:22:03,625
Yeah, yeah, yeah,
just eat it.

385
00:22:06,125 --> 00:22:08,125
Fire in the hole!

386
00:22:08,125 --> 00:22:11,625
That is one hot chili!
Give me some water.

387
00:22:14,375 --> 00:22:16,583
That'll be ten dollars.

388
00:22:16,583 --> 00:22:18,375
For water?

389
00:22:18,375 --> 00:22:21,958
Fine, I'll pay anything to get
rid of this burn in my mouth.

390
00:22:24,458 --> 00:22:26,000
This could work.

391
00:22:26,000 --> 00:22:29,416
Free chili!
Get your free chili!

392
00:22:29,416 --> 00:22:31,416
♪ Back on home
for dinnertime ♪