1 00:00:07,375 --> 00:00:09,083 Max! 2 00:00:09,083 --> 00:00:12,625 Did you spin yourself into a cotton candy cocoon again? 3 00:00:17,083 --> 00:00:18,375 [grunting] 4 00:00:18,375 --> 00:00:21,333 - [Max] Just get it... - You know what? 5 00:00:21,333 --> 00:00:23,208 This kind of behavior 6 00:00:23,208 --> 00:00:25,625 is exactly why you need to get into 7 00:00:25,625 --> 00:00:28,375 the Sophisticated Wizards of the World Club. 8 00:00:28,375 --> 00:00:31,333 They take future wizards and they mold their minds, 9 00:00:31,333 --> 00:00:32,583 into becoming... 10 00:00:32,583 --> 00:00:34,500 Oh. Guys like that. 11 00:00:34,500 --> 00:00:38,416 [chuckles] Look, he's got his wand in his briefcase. 12 00:00:38,416 --> 00:00:41,875 That's weird. I usually keep my briefs in my wand case. 13 00:00:41,875 --> 00:00:44,875 Oh, boy. We gotta call them right now. 14 00:00:44,875 --> 00:00:46,500 Come on. 15 00:00:46,500 --> 00:00:48,750 Justin, please, just tell me. Ooh, cotton candy. 16 00:00:48,750 --> 00:00:50,458 Max was in it. 17 00:00:50,458 --> 00:00:52,416 Please, Justin. 18 00:00:52,416 --> 00:00:54,583 You have your delinquent class to help you get ahead, 19 00:00:54,583 --> 00:00:57,708 just tell me how I can raise my standings in the wizard competition. 20 00:00:57,708 --> 00:00:59,458 Are you kidding me? I'll never give you the key 21 00:00:59,458 --> 00:01:01,208 to possibly winning the wizard competition. 22 00:01:01,208 --> 00:01:02,708 [scoffs] 23 00:01:02,708 --> 00:01:04,833 OK, well, fine. 24 00:01:04,833 --> 00:01:07,875 I'll just think of a clever way to get it out of you. 25 00:01:07,875 --> 00:01:10,500 [sarcastic voice] Yeah, OK. 26 00:01:10,500 --> 00:01:14,583 Or, I'll just start my own class. 27 00:01:14,583 --> 00:01:16,375 Helen would never let you do that. 28 00:01:16,375 --> 00:01:18,208 Helen has no power over me. 29 00:01:18,208 --> 00:01:19,958 I think as the head of the Wizard Family 30 00:01:19,958 --> 00:01:21,958 Competition Commissioner's Office, she does. 31 00:01:21,958 --> 00:01:25,875 [shouting] I just gave you everything you need to know! 32 00:01:25,875 --> 00:01:27,833 Yes, you did. You're the best brother ever. 33 00:01:27,833 --> 00:01:29,416 Get out! 34 00:01:32,000 --> 00:01:37,708 ♪ Everything is not what it seems ♪ 35 00:01:37,708 --> 00:01:39,875 ♪ Well, you know everything's gonna be a breeze ♪ 36 00:01:39,875 --> 00:01:42,000 ♪ That the end will no doubt justify the means ♪ 37 00:01:42,000 --> 00:01:44,416 ♪ You can fix any problem with the slightest of ease ♪ 38 00:01:44,416 --> 00:01:45,833 ♪ Yes, please ♪ 39 00:01:45,833 --> 00:01:47,583 ♪ But you might find out it'll go to your head ♪ 40 00:01:47,583 --> 00:01:49,291 ♪ When you write a report on a book you never read ♪ 41 00:01:49,291 --> 00:01:51,875 ♪ With the snap of your fingers you can make your bed ♪ 42 00:01:51,875 --> 00:01:53,416 ♪ That's what I said ♪ 43 00:01:53,416 --> 00:01:56,458 ♪ Everything is not what it seems ♪ 44 00:01:56,458 --> 00:02:00,458 ♪ When you can get all you wanted in your wildest dreams ♪ 45 00:02:00,458 --> 00:02:04,333 ♪ You might run into trouble if you go to extremes ♪ 46 00:02:04,333 --> 00:02:08,708 ♪ Because everything is not what it seems ♪ 47 00:02:08,708 --> 00:02:12,000 ♪ Be careful not to mess with the balance of things ♪ 48 00:02:12,000 --> 00:02:15,375 ♪ Because everything is not ♪ 49 00:02:15,375 --> 00:02:18,000 ♪ What it seems ♪♪ 50 00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:29,500 Excuse me, is this the Family Wizard Competition Commissioner's Office? 51 00:02:29,500 --> 00:02:31,583 Uh, it's gonna be. 52 00:02:31,583 --> 00:02:33,458 Now, when I got my promotion, 53 00:02:33,458 --> 00:02:37,083 all I asked for was an aquarium in my office. 54 00:02:37,083 --> 00:02:38,458 And you know what I got? 55 00:02:38,458 --> 00:02:42,083 My office in an aquarium. 56 00:02:44,333 --> 00:02:46,625 Why is that bug-eyed one looking at us? 57 00:02:46,625 --> 00:02:50,000 He's been giving me the evil eye since lunch. 58 00:02:51,000 --> 00:02:52,500 I had tuna. 59 00:02:54,458 --> 00:02:57,708 OK, well, my name is Alex Russo, 60 00:02:57,708 --> 00:03:00,000 and I'm trying to find a way to catch up 61 00:03:00,000 --> 00:03:01,500 in my family wizard competition. 62 00:03:01,500 --> 00:03:04,750 Alex Russo. 63 00:03:07,625 --> 00:03:10,000 Oh, based on your lousy record, 64 00:03:10,000 --> 00:03:12,500 you should take a delinquent class to earn points. 65 00:03:12,500 --> 00:03:16,500 Well, then sign me up. I am so delinquent. 66 00:03:16,500 --> 00:03:18,583 I turned my dad into a cockroach, 67 00:03:18,583 --> 00:03:20,833 fed chocolate to a pocket elf, and... 68 00:03:20,833 --> 00:03:24,875 Well, I'm just gonna say it: Exposed wizardry to the world. 69 00:03:24,875 --> 00:03:29,875 - That's right. To the world. - You know, listen, sweetie... 70 00:03:29,875 --> 00:03:33,125 I think it would be better for everybody 71 00:03:33,125 --> 00:03:36,458 if you just, uh... quit the competition. 72 00:03:36,458 --> 00:03:41,208 The world needs fishermen. Huh? 73 00:03:41,208 --> 00:03:44,333 Listen, Helen, I can't give up. 74 00:03:44,333 --> 00:03:46,583 Being in this competition is the only way 75 00:03:46,583 --> 00:03:48,583 I'll be able to stay with my werewolf boyfriend. 76 00:03:48,583 --> 00:03:50,000 Your boyfriend's a werewolf? 77 00:03:50,000 --> 00:03:53,875 How romantic! 78 00:03:53,875 --> 00:03:55,708 [laughing] Oh, come. 79 00:03:55,708 --> 00:03:59,583 This is my boyfriend, Teddy. 80 00:03:59,583 --> 00:04:01,583 He's a cyclops. 81 00:04:01,583 --> 00:04:06,250 I'm the apple of his... eye. 82 00:04:06,250 --> 00:04:08,166 How about if I sign you up 83 00:04:08,166 --> 00:04:10,750 for your brother's delinquent class? 84 00:04:10,750 --> 00:04:12,750 Now, if you show a marked improvement, 85 00:04:12,750 --> 00:04:14,208 you could move up a level. 86 00:04:14,208 --> 00:04:16,708 There's only one tiny problem. 87 00:04:16,708 --> 00:04:19,000 There's no way Justin will let me in his class. 88 00:04:19,000 --> 00:04:22,000 Ha, sweetie, he can argue all he wants, 89 00:04:22,000 --> 00:04:24,208 but he can't argue with... 90 00:04:24,208 --> 00:04:27,083 ...the official stamp. 91 00:04:34,583 --> 00:04:36,000 [horn blowing] 92 00:04:36,000 --> 00:04:38,416 OK, everyone needs to be nice 93 00:04:38,416 --> 00:04:40,291 to the Sophisticated Wizards Club. 94 00:04:40,291 --> 00:04:42,416 They're an elite group, and we want Max to get in. 95 00:04:42,416 --> 00:04:43,875 Oh, come on! 96 00:04:43,875 --> 00:04:45,958 "Elite" just means a bunch of stuck-up snobs 97 00:04:45,958 --> 00:04:47,125 who try to get by in life with 98 00:04:47,125 --> 00:04:48,958 - their charm and good looks. - Hey. 99 00:04:51,333 --> 00:04:54,833 Hello, I'm Fidel. Rack of lamb hat, correct? 100 00:04:54,833 --> 00:04:59,125 What about it, fancy pants? 101 00:04:59,125 --> 00:05:01,708 Most of the ladies I know aren't fashion-savvy enough 102 00:05:01,708 --> 00:05:03,875 to wear such a prime cut of meat. 103 00:05:06,875 --> 00:05:09,208 Oh! Oh, yeah, don't drink that. 104 00:05:09,208 --> 00:05:10,583 I kind of washed my feet in it 105 00:05:10,583 --> 00:05:12,708 before I knew you were so nice. 106 00:05:14,958 --> 00:05:19,291 Mmm! This punch is delicious! 107 00:05:19,291 --> 00:05:21,333 Back to our discussion on all things "wand." 108 00:05:21,333 --> 00:05:22,875 Wand etiquette, wand history, 109 00:05:22,875 --> 00:05:25,833 and alternative uses of the wand. 110 00:05:25,833 --> 00:05:28,125 Well, how's this for your wand etiquette, Fidel? 111 00:05:28,125 --> 00:05:30,291 Ah! My brain! 112 00:05:30,291 --> 00:05:33,375 Someone shish-kabobbed my brain! [groans] 113 00:05:33,375 --> 00:05:36,375 I'm just kidding. I made this wand. 114 00:05:36,375 --> 00:05:38,000 You should've seen your face, dude. 115 00:05:40,125 --> 00:05:43,750 You should've seen your face, dude. 116 00:05:43,750 --> 00:05:46,458 Max, we have something to tell you. 117 00:05:47,416 --> 00:05:49,000 Welcome to the club! 118 00:05:50,166 --> 00:05:52,291 Yes! He's in! 119 00:05:52,291 --> 00:05:55,000 Look at my face now! Look! 120 00:05:57,458 --> 00:06:00,333 Now, the key to mastering a spell 121 00:06:00,333 --> 00:06:01,875 is focusing your inner wizard 122 00:06:01,875 --> 00:06:04,416 and summoning all your power. 123 00:06:04,416 --> 00:06:08,375 It's a little something I like to call using the Force. 124 00:06:08,375 --> 00:06:11,583 The Force? You ripped that off ofStar Wars. 125 00:06:11,583 --> 00:06:14,083 Or did they rip it off from me? 126 00:06:14,083 --> 00:06:16,416 And you ripped that off too! 127 00:06:16,416 --> 00:06:17,875 [door opening] 128 00:06:17,875 --> 00:06:19,500 All right, move over, delinquents. 129 00:06:19,500 --> 00:06:21,708 I'm part of your class now. 130 00:06:21,708 --> 00:06:23,125 What are you talking about? 131 00:06:23,125 --> 00:06:25,083 This is how I'm gonna get back in the wizard competition. 132 00:06:25,083 --> 00:06:27,291 So, where do I sit? 133 00:06:27,291 --> 00:06:29,375 There's no way I'm gonna let you in my class. 134 00:06:29,375 --> 00:06:31,958 Come on, Mr. Justin. Your sister's kind of cute. 135 00:06:31,958 --> 00:06:33,458 Ah, thank you. 136 00:06:33,458 --> 00:06:35,625 No way! She'll be disruptive, 137 00:06:35,625 --> 00:06:37,250 she'll undermine me, and I have full authority 138 00:06:37,250 --> 00:06:38,875 to deny her entry. Denied. 139 00:06:38,875 --> 00:06:40,291 I have an enrollment slip. 140 00:06:40,291 --> 00:06:42,500 - That means nothing. - Check out the stamp. 141 00:06:42,500 --> 00:06:44,833 Not the official stamp! 142 00:06:47,208 --> 00:06:48,583 [whispering] Take your seat, Miss Russo. 143 00:06:50,708 --> 00:06:54,291 Apparently, we have a new student. 144 00:06:54,291 --> 00:06:56,958 Alex Russo. No one talk to her. 145 00:06:56,958 --> 00:07:00,000 Yeah, no one talk to me. I'm here to learn. 146 00:07:00,000 --> 00:07:01,291 I really like your boots, by the way. 147 00:07:01,291 --> 00:07:03,958 What's the difference between a corn and a bunion? 148 00:07:03,958 --> 00:07:05,500 Can we get back to the morph spell, please? 149 00:07:05,500 --> 00:07:08,458 Eyes up here. Now, who's going to morph into... 150 00:07:08,458 --> 00:07:11,083 ...let's say, Shaquille O'Neal, 151 00:07:11,083 --> 00:07:13,500 one of the greatest footballers ever? 152 00:07:14,375 --> 00:07:16,291 I'll do it! Ah, look at me. 153 00:07:16,291 --> 00:07:18,166 I'm already the teacher's pet. 154 00:07:18,166 --> 00:07:19,708 All right. 155 00:07:19,708 --> 00:07:23,708 Morphus morpharium morfishplease Shaq. 156 00:07:23,708 --> 00:07:26,416 [Justin] Close. That's a shack. 157 00:07:29,583 --> 00:07:32,166 [sighs] Man, I'm really out of practice. 158 00:07:32,166 --> 00:07:33,750 I do need this class. 159 00:07:33,750 --> 00:07:38,875 Wow. She was even cute when she looked like an outhouse. 160 00:07:42,291 --> 00:07:43,583 [all laughing] 161 00:07:43,583 --> 00:07:47,125 My word, I'm Professor Crumbs. 162 00:07:47,125 --> 00:07:49,500 I'm as old as dirt, and I have a family of geese 163 00:07:49,500 --> 00:07:51,000 under my beard. 164 00:07:51,000 --> 00:07:52,958 Just kidding. There's a chicken! 165 00:07:54,708 --> 00:07:56,500 That's a wonderful imitation. 166 00:07:56,500 --> 00:07:59,416 I'm so glad you're fitting in with us sophisticated young men. 167 00:07:59,416 --> 00:08:01,125 Well, I fit in lots of places. 168 00:08:01,125 --> 00:08:02,708 Especially my dad's gym bag. 169 00:08:02,708 --> 00:08:04,750 He uses it when we go to the movies. 170 00:08:06,291 --> 00:08:10,208 Jerry, when are they gonna make him more sophisticated? 171 00:08:10,208 --> 00:08:12,083 This is how boys bond. 172 00:08:12,083 --> 00:08:14,000 They break the ice by joking around, 173 00:08:14,000 --> 00:08:16,500 then they'll get down to the sophisticated stuff. 174 00:08:16,500 --> 00:08:18,000 Hmm. By the way, 175 00:08:18,000 --> 00:08:20,458 I'm glad you finally found a good use for your gym bag. 176 00:08:24,166 --> 00:08:27,708 Pardon us. Can I talk to you? 177 00:08:27,708 --> 00:08:29,500 Looks like you're really fitting in with everybody. 178 00:08:29,500 --> 00:08:31,708 That's good. But if you want to learn from these guys 179 00:08:31,708 --> 00:08:34,291 you have to jump in on their wand discussions. 180 00:08:34,291 --> 00:08:36,333 Yeah, Dad, I got plenty of wand stories. 181 00:08:36,333 --> 00:08:37,708 Remember that time I lost my wand, 182 00:08:37,708 --> 00:08:40,958 and we found it a year later when I got that X-ray? 183 00:08:42,708 --> 00:08:45,375 You don't always have to start with the first story 184 00:08:45,375 --> 00:08:46,875 that pops into your mind. 185 00:08:46,875 --> 00:08:48,625 - OK? - [muted] 186 00:08:48,625 --> 00:08:52,416 Oh, no. I seem to have gotten something on my robe. 187 00:08:52,416 --> 00:08:54,291 This is how you charm your way through life. 188 00:08:54,291 --> 00:08:55,625 Watch and learn. 189 00:08:55,625 --> 00:08:59,000 [clears throat] Excuse me, Harper. 190 00:08:59,000 --> 00:09:01,375 Do you know a facility nearby that can clean my robe? 191 00:09:01,375 --> 00:09:03,250 Why don't you just use magic to clean it? 192 00:09:03,250 --> 00:09:05,416 There's no delicate setting on my wand. 193 00:09:05,416 --> 00:09:08,083 And I like things delicate. Like you. 194 00:09:10,000 --> 00:09:12,583 Just stop it right now! 195 00:09:14,583 --> 00:09:16,583 OK, give me your robe. I'll clean it for you. 196 00:09:16,583 --> 00:09:19,750 Excellent. Gents, Harper here will be cleaning our robes. 197 00:09:19,750 --> 00:09:20,875 Whoa, whoa, whoa! 198 00:09:20,875 --> 00:09:22,458 - Wait a second! - Yes, wait. 199 00:09:22,458 --> 00:09:24,000 You can't just saddle her with your robes. 200 00:09:24,000 --> 00:09:26,708 You'll tarnish her beautiful personality. 201 00:09:26,708 --> 00:09:30,750 Well, I really don't see the connection, 202 00:09:30,750 --> 00:09:35,500 but it still sounded nice. All right, load me up, gents. 203 00:09:36,875 --> 00:09:39,291 Why does she have to be in my class? 204 00:09:39,291 --> 00:09:41,291 I'm gonna take a field trip to Monkey Island 205 00:09:41,291 --> 00:09:43,750 and leave her there. 206 00:09:43,750 --> 00:09:46,208 Oh, look. 207 00:09:46,208 --> 00:09:49,708 The Sophisticated Wizards of the World. 208 00:09:49,708 --> 00:09:52,125 You know something, guys, if I didn't lose my good standing 209 00:09:52,125 --> 00:09:55,000 in the family competition, I'd be in your club. 210 00:09:55,000 --> 00:09:56,583 I'd be the president of your club, 211 00:09:56,583 --> 00:09:58,000 leading vibrant discussions 212 00:09:58,000 --> 00:09:59,833 on commonly mispronounced spell words. 213 00:09:59,833 --> 00:10:02,500 For instance, "hocus pocus" 214 00:10:02,500 --> 00:10:05,125 properly pronounced, "hokoos pokoos." 215 00:10:09,000 --> 00:10:11,708 Sounds like we're really missing out. 216 00:10:11,708 --> 00:10:13,250 [laughs sarcastically] 217 00:10:15,875 --> 00:10:19,416 Well, Justin, I'm sure you're far too busy 218 00:10:19,416 --> 00:10:22,833 being the president of the "I'm losing the wizard competition club." 219 00:10:22,833 --> 00:10:24,083 Now, why don't you go have a meeting. 220 00:10:24,083 --> 00:10:25,833 [all laughing] 221 00:10:27,458 --> 00:10:28,750 Enjoy this while you can, Max, 222 00:10:28,750 --> 00:10:30,000 because I'm gonna catch up to you, 223 00:10:30,000 --> 00:10:32,458 and then I'm gonna take your spot in this... club. 224 00:10:32,458 --> 00:10:34,875 And then you can take my spot in my loser club. 225 00:10:34,875 --> 00:10:36,958 That I don't have! 226 00:10:44,083 --> 00:10:46,125 Max, we may have a problem. 227 00:10:46,125 --> 00:10:48,291 Justin's not going to give up on the competition. 228 00:10:48,291 --> 00:10:50,958 I know. Why does he want to win it so bad? 229 00:10:50,958 --> 00:10:55,166 It's just a fantastic life of unlimited powers. 230 00:10:55,166 --> 00:10:56,833 We like having you, Max. 231 00:10:56,833 --> 00:10:58,333 We don't want Justin in the club. 232 00:10:58,333 --> 00:11:01,291 He'll try to take my place as president, 233 00:11:01,291 --> 00:11:04,500 and your brother is much too stodgy. 234 00:11:04,500 --> 00:11:06,375 Fidel, he's not stodgy. 235 00:11:06,375 --> 00:11:10,333 He may be uninteresting, formal, really boring... 236 00:11:10,333 --> 00:11:12,333 Definitely not stodgy, though. 237 00:11:12,333 --> 00:11:14,875 [all laughing] 238 00:11:16,000 --> 00:11:18,083 We cannot lose this delightful fellow. 239 00:11:18,083 --> 00:11:19,458 He's our own personal buffoon. 240 00:11:22,625 --> 00:11:24,625 Listen, Max, 241 00:11:24,625 --> 00:11:27,083 I'm going to let you in on a little known rule. 242 00:11:27,083 --> 00:11:28,833 When you're this far ahead of your siblings, 243 00:11:28,833 --> 00:11:30,750 you're permitted to move up the family wizard competition 244 00:11:30,750 --> 00:11:32,458 to whatever date you want. 245 00:11:32,458 --> 00:11:35,000 You might as well do it now, before Justin catches up to you. 246 00:11:35,000 --> 00:11:36,708 You're right. 247 00:11:36,708 --> 00:11:39,000 The sooner I win, the sooner I can use magic 248 00:11:39,000 --> 00:11:41,625 to make big legs and only take two steps to school. 249 00:11:41,625 --> 00:11:45,458 The laughs never stop with you. 250 00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:51,500 Alex, why are you wasting my time? 251 00:11:51,500 --> 00:11:53,500 You were supposed to turn into Justin Bieber, 252 00:11:53,500 --> 00:11:56,500 not just a beaver. 253 00:11:56,500 --> 00:11:59,375 [high voice] What went wrong? I said the spell correctly. 254 00:12:01,833 --> 00:12:04,333 You were just going through the motions. 255 00:12:04,333 --> 00:12:06,833 You gotta focus your inner wizard 256 00:12:06,833 --> 00:12:08,333 and summon all your powers. 257 00:12:08,333 --> 00:12:09,875 It can't just be 90 percent spell, 258 00:12:09,875 --> 00:12:12,291 and 10 percent "Ooh, what's going on for TV tonight?" 259 00:12:12,291 --> 00:12:15,291 Well, at eight o'clock, it's Kicked in Hysterical Places, 260 00:12:15,291 --> 00:12:17,708 - then at nine... - See? 261 00:12:17,708 --> 00:12:22,583 - There's no helping you. - Come on, Justin. 262 00:12:22,583 --> 00:12:26,333 Please, I need to make a comeback in this competition. 263 00:12:26,333 --> 00:12:28,250 And, hey, if I do better, 264 00:12:28,250 --> 00:12:30,125 that means you've helped another delinquent wizard, 265 00:12:30,125 --> 00:12:31,875 and that helps you, too. 266 00:12:31,875 --> 00:12:33,958 You're right. 267 00:12:33,958 --> 00:12:36,291 Maybe in a year we'll have enough points to catch up to Max. 268 00:12:36,291 --> 00:12:40,208 All we need is a little time to raise our standings. 269 00:12:41,833 --> 00:12:44,250 Hey, guys. So I moved up the final wizard competition 270 00:12:44,250 --> 00:12:45,750 to Monday at 4pm. 271 00:12:45,750 --> 00:12:47,708 Let's just get this thing done, right? 272 00:12:49,125 --> 00:12:50,291 [both] What?! 273 00:12:53,875 --> 00:12:56,083 I can't believe that Max moved up the final 274 00:12:56,083 --> 00:12:58,583 wizard competition. Is that even legal? 275 00:12:58,583 --> 00:13:00,458 Yeah, the competition code clearly states it. 276 00:13:00,458 --> 00:13:03,208 Only Max can change the date back. 277 00:13:03,208 --> 00:13:05,458 OK, don't worry about it. I'll... 278 00:13:05,458 --> 00:13:06,750 I'll go talk to him. I can reason with him. 279 00:13:06,750 --> 00:13:09,083 - Say that last sentence again. - I can reason with him. 280 00:13:10,583 --> 00:13:13,250 I will distract him with something shiny. 281 00:13:18,375 --> 00:13:21,250 If Max is the only one that can change the date back, 282 00:13:21,250 --> 00:13:23,291 then that's what he's gonna do. 283 00:13:23,291 --> 00:13:27,500 All right, concentrate. Pull my powers together. 284 00:13:27,500 --> 00:13:30,708 Morphus morpharium morfishplease Max. 285 00:13:32,083 --> 00:13:34,750 Whoa. I did the spell so well, 286 00:13:34,750 --> 00:13:37,583 I'm even itchy in a lot of weird places, just like Max. 287 00:13:47,291 --> 00:13:50,166 Harper, you're not ironing 288 00:13:50,166 --> 00:13:52,208 all of their wizard robes, are you? 289 00:13:53,625 --> 00:13:56,166 I think these boys are taking advantage of you. 290 00:13:56,166 --> 00:13:58,000 They're not taking advantage of me. 291 00:13:58,000 --> 00:13:59,500 They're paying me. 292 00:13:59,500 --> 00:14:02,583 In compliments. 293 00:14:04,208 --> 00:14:06,750 Listen, kid, you should be ashamed of yourself 294 00:14:06,750 --> 00:14:09,416 - for taking advantage of... - Your lovely home? 295 00:14:09,416 --> 00:14:11,958 Thank you for letting our group meet here. 296 00:14:11,958 --> 00:14:14,250 It's as beautiful as your personality. 297 00:14:14,250 --> 00:14:17,208 Oh! Thank you, Fidel. 298 00:14:19,000 --> 00:14:24,708 Well, then, make yourself at home in my lovely home. 299 00:14:24,708 --> 00:14:25,875 Excuse me. 300 00:14:28,416 --> 00:14:29,583 See what I told you? 301 00:14:29,583 --> 00:14:31,416 They want to serve us, they just don't know it. 302 00:14:31,416 --> 00:14:35,083 Hey, um, I heard you talking to Mrs. Russo. 303 00:14:35,083 --> 00:14:36,583 Are you taking advantage of me? 304 00:14:36,583 --> 00:14:39,250 Because I'm the one with the beautiful personality, not her. 305 00:14:39,250 --> 00:14:42,875 Harper, you both have equally beautiful personalities. 306 00:14:42,875 --> 00:14:46,875 How does one compare a sunset to a rainbow? 307 00:14:52,000 --> 00:14:54,458 Yep, he's taking advantage of me. 308 00:14:56,291 --> 00:14:58,208 Huh. 309 00:14:59,458 --> 00:15:02,000 All right, sophisticates. 310 00:15:02,000 --> 00:15:03,958 Time to go out to the terrace for a breath of fresh air, 311 00:15:03,958 --> 00:15:05,583 and some scintillating conversation 312 00:15:05,583 --> 00:15:07,958 about the evolution of the wand. 313 00:15:07,958 --> 00:15:10,250 Oh, cool, I know a lot about wands. 314 00:15:10,250 --> 00:15:12,958 Oh, this should be funny. 315 00:15:12,958 --> 00:15:16,833 Did you guys know that if you sit down with a wand in your pocket, it breaks? 316 00:15:16,833 --> 00:15:17,958 Then you can order a new one, 317 00:15:17,958 --> 00:15:20,208 but it takes six to eight weeks to arrive. 318 00:15:22,125 --> 00:15:25,375 Wow, that wasn't very funny at all. 319 00:15:25,375 --> 00:15:27,458 I wasn't really trying to be funny. 320 00:15:27,458 --> 00:15:30,125 I was being scintillating. 321 00:15:32,958 --> 00:15:34,750 You know, Max, you don't need to worry 322 00:15:34,750 --> 00:15:36,708 about all of the club discussions. 323 00:15:36,708 --> 00:15:39,833 Why don't you stay here and finish preparing your watermelon shoes? 324 00:15:39,833 --> 00:15:42,125 That's a better use of everyone's time. 325 00:15:46,083 --> 00:15:49,458 Max, what was that all about? 326 00:15:49,458 --> 00:15:50,958 I don't know. 327 00:15:50,958 --> 00:15:54,458 I guess they're just really excited to see my watermelon shoes. 328 00:15:54,458 --> 00:15:57,458 Dad, Max changed the wizard competition to Monday. 329 00:15:57,458 --> 00:15:59,625 Now, Alex and I have no chance of catching up. 330 00:15:59,625 --> 00:16:01,416 - You did what?! - I moved it up. 331 00:16:01,416 --> 00:16:02,875 The club thought it was a good idea. 332 00:16:02,875 --> 00:16:04,291 Well, change it back. 333 00:16:04,291 --> 00:16:05,708 Look, I came here to reason with you, 334 00:16:05,708 --> 00:16:08,708 but I will give you an intimidating stare-down if I have to. 335 00:16:08,708 --> 00:16:10,875 Justin, I'll handle this, OK? 336 00:16:10,875 --> 00:16:13,500 It was the club's idea? Why would they do that? 337 00:16:13,500 --> 00:16:15,750 [scoffs] Obvious reasons. I'm more sophisticated. 338 00:16:15,750 --> 00:16:16,875 You're making watermelon shoes. 339 00:16:16,875 --> 00:16:18,625 There's nothing sophisticated about that. 340 00:16:20,583 --> 00:16:23,375 Ha! You blinked! I win! Yes! 341 00:16:23,375 --> 00:16:25,583 Ha! 342 00:16:27,000 --> 00:16:30,000 Max, I don't like that the club 343 00:16:30,000 --> 00:16:31,833 had you change the competition date. 344 00:16:31,833 --> 00:16:34,208 It's not fair to your brother and sister. 345 00:16:34,208 --> 00:16:35,500 And they're not even letting you 346 00:16:35,500 --> 00:16:38,166 participate in their discussions. 347 00:16:38,166 --> 00:16:42,000 I'm starting to wonder why they even let you in the club. 348 00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:45,583 Well, they like it when I make them laugh. 349 00:16:45,583 --> 00:16:49,416 Yeah, it sounds like they're treating you like a clown. 350 00:16:49,416 --> 00:16:51,750 You're right. 351 00:16:51,750 --> 00:16:55,166 I'm not really a member of this club at all, am I? 352 00:16:55,166 --> 00:16:56,958 I'm sorry, Dad. 353 00:16:56,958 --> 00:16:59,583 I know how much you wanted me to be a Sophisticated Wizard. 354 00:16:59,583 --> 00:17:01,000 No. No, no, no, no. 355 00:17:01,000 --> 00:17:03,875 I'm the one who should be apologizing to you. 356 00:17:03,875 --> 00:17:06,500 I don't want you to be like one of those jerks. 357 00:17:06,500 --> 00:17:09,625 I want you to be just the way you are, Max. 358 00:17:09,625 --> 00:17:12,583 - [sighing] - Look, forget about the club. 359 00:17:12,583 --> 00:17:14,500 Really? Thanks, 360 00:17:14,500 --> 00:17:16,500 'cause I was starting to run out of funny material. 361 00:17:18,416 --> 00:17:19,833 I'm gonna do the right thing, Dad. 362 00:17:19,833 --> 00:17:21,083 I'm gonna move the competition back. 363 00:17:21,083 --> 00:17:23,458 Good for you, Max. I'm proud of you. 364 00:17:23,458 --> 00:17:26,250 Hey. That's sophisticated. 365 00:17:26,250 --> 00:17:29,125 Before I leave, can you do me a favor? 366 00:17:29,125 --> 00:17:30,708 Strap on those watermelon shoes? 367 00:17:30,708 --> 00:17:32,958 The guys are really looking forward to seeing them. 368 00:17:32,958 --> 00:17:34,833 No problem. 369 00:17:34,833 --> 00:17:37,333 I'll show them the watermelon. 370 00:17:40,750 --> 00:17:43,875 Uh, excuse me? Sophisticated Club? 371 00:17:43,875 --> 00:17:46,708 - Max quits! - [splatting] 372 00:17:50,958 --> 00:17:54,583 Max, I don't understand. 373 00:17:54,583 --> 00:17:58,250 You just had your family's wizard competition moved up 374 00:17:58,250 --> 00:18:00,583 and now you want to move it back? 375 00:18:00,583 --> 00:18:02,583 Yeah, it's just better for people 376 00:18:02,583 --> 00:18:04,291 if they don't try to figure me out. 377 00:18:04,291 --> 00:18:06,583 And my sister, Alex, is beautiful. 378 00:18:06,583 --> 00:18:08,958 What? 379 00:18:08,958 --> 00:18:11,416 Nothing. Just wanted to hear myself say that. 380 00:18:14,958 --> 00:18:17,000 Another Max Russo? 381 00:18:17,000 --> 00:18:19,458 What is going on? 382 00:18:20,875 --> 00:18:22,208 [gasping] 383 00:18:25,000 --> 00:18:26,958 Max, what are you doing here? 384 00:18:28,625 --> 00:18:30,875 It's me, Justin. 385 00:18:30,875 --> 00:18:34,291 I came here to change the competition back to its original preset date. 386 00:18:34,291 --> 00:18:36,458 Wait. Max. 387 00:18:36,458 --> 00:18:38,750 Girl clothes. Jewelry. Alex! 388 00:18:38,750 --> 00:18:42,166 Yes, I came to change the date back, too. 389 00:18:42,166 --> 00:18:44,083 You see, Helen, this was so important to me, 390 00:18:44,083 --> 00:18:46,458 that I decided to come here twice to tell you. 391 00:18:46,458 --> 00:18:50,250 Nice to see you again... Helen. 392 00:18:50,250 --> 00:18:52,000 [giggling] 393 00:18:52,000 --> 00:18:53,333 [magic door opening] Helen, I'm here 394 00:18:53,333 --> 00:18:54,875 to change the date back to... 395 00:18:54,875 --> 00:18:57,833 Hey, what am I already doing here? 396 00:18:57,833 --> 00:19:00,708 That's what I'd like to know. 397 00:19:00,708 --> 00:19:02,750 Helen, would you give us a moment? 398 00:19:04,000 --> 00:19:06,125 Max, it's Justin and Alex. 399 00:19:06,125 --> 00:19:08,000 Look, you weren't gonna change the competition back, 400 00:19:08,000 --> 00:19:09,750 so we had to do something. 401 00:19:09,750 --> 00:19:12,750 So, you turned yourself into me and went behind my back? 402 00:19:12,750 --> 00:19:15,291 You actually went behind all three of my backs. 403 00:19:15,291 --> 00:19:18,875 Justin, get him out of here! You guys are ruining my plan. 404 00:19:18,875 --> 00:19:20,291 It was a dumb plan anyway. 405 00:19:20,291 --> 00:19:22,250 - You had the same plan! - Right. 406 00:19:22,250 --> 00:19:25,000 You know what? I'm keeping the wizard competition on Monday. 407 00:19:25,000 --> 00:19:27,708 Nobody imitates me and gets away with it. 408 00:19:27,708 --> 00:19:30,500 Except for that little guy I see when I look in a spoon. 409 00:19:32,208 --> 00:19:33,208 What? 410 00:19:35,583 --> 00:19:37,333 Change it back. 411 00:19:37,333 --> 00:19:40,291 That didn't hurt. You should have thrown that board. 412 00:19:49,333 --> 00:19:50,583 [grunting] 413 00:19:56,625 --> 00:19:59,583 Let go, this is a new top! 414 00:19:59,583 --> 00:20:01,500 Ugh, your body's sweating. 415 00:20:01,500 --> 00:20:04,083 Gross. Now my shirt has pit stains. 416 00:20:04,083 --> 00:20:05,875 You guys shouldn't mess with me. 417 00:20:05,875 --> 00:20:08,250 I know my own weaknesses. 418 00:20:08,250 --> 00:20:11,125 [both chanting at once] 419 00:20:15,750 --> 00:20:19,083 - [shocked gasp] - Max? 420 00:20:21,708 --> 00:20:23,583 What? 421 00:20:23,583 --> 00:20:27,375 OK. I have no idea what just happened here, 422 00:20:27,375 --> 00:20:30,291 - but Monday is off. - [both] Yes! 423 00:20:30,291 --> 00:20:34,375 The original Russo family wizard competition date stands. 424 00:20:34,375 --> 00:20:38,291 I think you two Maxes and the little girl 425 00:20:38,291 --> 00:20:40,083 could use the time to work things out. 426 00:20:42,416 --> 00:20:44,416 Why did she just say "little girl?" 427 00:20:44,416 --> 00:20:48,000 - [laughing] - [nervous laughter] 428 00:20:51,125 --> 00:20:53,583 Yes, we did it. We got the competition changed back. 429 00:20:53,583 --> 00:20:55,875 Why did she say "little girl?" 430 00:20:55,875 --> 00:21:00,000 Uh, we might've accidentally turned you into a little girl. 431 00:21:00,000 --> 00:21:01,375 What? 432 00:21:01,375 --> 00:21:04,000 Don't worry about it, I'll change you back. 433 00:21:04,000 --> 00:21:06,500 Here's the brass tacks. Turn this girl back to Max. 434 00:21:13,125 --> 00:21:15,333 There you go. You changed back. 435 00:21:15,333 --> 00:21:18,875 You... You really do look great. You do. 436 00:21:18,875 --> 00:21:21,250 The spell worked and you look good. 437 00:21:21,250 --> 00:21:23,375 Thank you. 438 00:21:23,375 --> 00:21:25,833 You know, I thought I was gonna be stuck like that. 439 00:21:27,583 --> 00:21:31,333 Wait, why are my clothes so baggy? 440 00:21:31,333 --> 00:21:34,458 And why do I have dainty little hands? 441 00:21:34,458 --> 00:21:37,458 Why is my voice so high? 442 00:21:41,208 --> 00:21:43,958 I'm sure I'm fine. 443 00:21:47,333 --> 00:21:49,583 OK, so, apparently when Alex and I did our spells, 444 00:21:49,583 --> 00:21:52,083 they collided and formed a mutant spell. 445 00:21:52,083 --> 00:21:54,583 But, there's a test here to determine how long 446 00:21:54,583 --> 00:21:56,208 until the spell wears off. 447 00:21:56,208 --> 00:21:59,833 A test? I usually have time to study before I fail. 448 00:22:00,833 --> 00:22:03,166 Blow into the Spell Detector. 449 00:22:04,583 --> 00:22:06,750 [donkey braying] 450 00:22:09,875 --> 00:22:12,708 - What does that noise mean? - She may be a little girl, 451 00:22:12,708 --> 00:22:16,625 but she definitely has Max's donkey breath. 452 00:22:16,625 --> 00:22:18,166 OK, so if it's a church bell, 453 00:22:18,166 --> 00:22:19,875 that means the spell will last four days. 454 00:22:19,875 --> 00:22:22,000 If it's a drum roll, that's one week. 455 00:22:22,000 --> 00:22:24,750 If it's a donkey honk, it's... 456 00:22:24,750 --> 00:22:28,958 ...uh, indefinitely. 457 00:22:28,958 --> 00:22:32,333 Looks like you're gonna be stuck like this for a while. 458 00:22:32,333 --> 00:22:34,000 [scoffs, laughs] 459 00:22:37,208 --> 00:22:39,000 You stay out of my closet.