1 00:00:04,200 --> 00:00:05,360 Yeah, right. 2 00:00:05,560 --> 00:00:07,280 Glasses on, he's Clark Kent. 3 00:00:07,400 --> 00:00:09,080 Glasses off, he's Superman. 4 00:00:09,680 --> 00:00:11,640 Like nobody would figure that out! 5 00:00:12,160 --> 00:00:14,560 I know it is so obvious. 6 00:00:15,480 --> 00:00:16,600 How's my moustache? 7 00:00:17,320 --> 00:00:17,720 Perfect. 8 00:00:18,320 --> 00:00:19,800 Man, Mamaw should have been here by now. 9 00:00:19,800 --> 00:00:20,840 What time does her plane get in? 10 00:00:20,960 --> 00:00:22,160 Don't ask me. I offered 11 00:00:22,280 --> 00:00:23,600 to pick her up, but the woman wouldn't even 12 00:00:23,640 --> 00:00:24,840 give me her flight number. 13 00:00:25,160 --> 00:00:26,640 You know, sometimes she can be as 14 00:00:26,680 --> 00:00:29,640 tight-lipped as a frog eating a peanut butter fly. 15 00:00:31,560 --> 00:00:33,800 Frog eating a peanut butter fly. You get it? 16 00:00:34,800 --> 00:00:35,520 Is that a new one, Dad? 17 00:00:35,760 --> 00:00:37,640 Yeah, I just made it up last night. You like it? 18 00:00:38,080 --> 00:00:39,280 Well as long as it doesn't end up 19 00:00:39,320 --> 00:00:41,480 in one of my songs, I think it's brilliant. 20 00:00:42,560 --> 00:00:44,440 Well, darlin', I know you'd love to be here to give your 21 00:00:44,480 --> 00:00:47,040 grandma a hug, but I've got to get you to that photo shoot. 22 00:00:47,400 --> 00:00:48,240 Yeah, you're right, but 23 00:00:48,720 --> 00:00:49,720 what's taking her so long? 24 00:00:52,160 --> 00:00:53,800 Oh, sweet Pete, 25 00:00:53,840 --> 00:00:55,920 the woman drove all the way here from Tennessee? 26 00:00:55,960 --> 00:00:57,040 Well how do you know it's her? 27 00:00:58,240 --> 00:01:01,360 Get out of the driveway, you stupid cat! 28 00:01:02,040 --> 00:01:03,040 Just a hunch. 29 00:01:03,840 --> 00:01:05,920 I hope she didn't squish Fluffy! 30 00:01:06,880 --> 00:01:07,680 Mamaw! 31 00:01:09,840 --> 00:01:11,840 Don't squeeze too hard. I've been 32 00:01:11,920 --> 00:01:13,800 sucking down iced tea since Albuquerque. 33 00:01:15,440 --> 00:01:17,960 You drove this rust bucket all the way across the country? 34 00:01:18,760 --> 00:01:20,440 If you're in such a hurry to risk your life, 35 00:01:20,560 --> 00:01:23,240 why not just walk into bear country wearing fish pants? 36 00:01:24,600 --> 00:01:27,000 Funny, I don't remember sitting on your egg 37 00:01:27,080 --> 00:01:30,160 for three weeks, but apparently I hatched a chicken! 38 00:01:31,840 --> 00:01:33,400 Burn! Up top! 39 00:01:34,280 --> 00:01:36,200 I just care about you, that's all. Aw. 40 00:01:36,240 --> 00:01:37,640 Oh, Dad, don't worry. 41 00:01:37,880 --> 00:01:39,880 Mamaw wouldn't drive anything that's not safe. 42 00:01:40,200 --> 00:01:41,720 And besides, this car's a classic. 43 00:01:41,720 --> 00:01:42,840 They don't make them like this anymore. 44 00:01:44,240 --> 00:01:46,160 Probably because it's against the law! 45 00:01:46,480 --> 00:01:47,960 Oh, hush! 46 00:01:48,080 --> 00:01:50,040 I'll have you know that Loretta here drove your 47 00:01:50,080 --> 00:01:52,080 grandpa and me to Hoover Dam on our honeymoon, 48 00:01:52,440 --> 00:01:54,480 took your grandpa to work for forty years, and me 49 00:01:54,480 --> 00:01:57,040 to the hospital the day your daddy was born. Well, 50 00:01:57,480 --> 00:01:59,440 almost. He was in such a big hurry, 51 00:01:59,480 --> 00:02:01,320 he popped out right there on that front seat. 52 00:02:01,360 --> 00:02:01,600 Ew. 53 00:02:06,880 --> 00:02:08,440 Well, uh, speaking of being in a hurry, 54 00:02:08,480 --> 00:02:10,120 I've got to get this girl to a photo shoot. 55 00:02:10,240 --> 00:02:12,240 Not to worry, I will just drive you. 56 00:02:12,320 --> 00:02:13,040 No! 57 00:02:14,640 --> 00:02:16,200 Uh, remember, you've got eight-hundred miles 58 00:02:16,200 --> 00:02:17,280 of iced tea to take care of. 59 00:02:17,880 --> 00:02:19,880 Not to mention that over-ripe bag of cherries 60 00:02:19,920 --> 00:02:21,200 that I bought in Barstow. 61 00:02:22,280 --> 00:02:23,320 You know what? 62 00:02:23,560 --> 00:02:24,880 I'm just going to move this out of the way 63 00:02:24,880 --> 00:02:26,800 so I'm not blocking the garage. 64 00:02:27,560 --> 00:02:29,600 Well, hold on, Mamaw, let us get your bags. 65 00:02:40,880 --> 00:02:43,760 Maybe I should stop using Uncle Earl's homemade gas. 66 00:02:44,640 --> 00:02:45,480 You think? 67 00:03:41,040 --> 00:03:42,800 I promise, Hannah will be there tomorrow. 68 00:03:44,080 --> 00:03:45,800 Well, thanks to that old clunker of yours, 69 00:03:45,800 --> 00:03:47,800 I just had to cancel a very important 70 00:03:47,800 --> 00:03:48,880 photo shoot for Miley. 71 00:03:49,400 --> 00:03:50,760 Well what would you like me to do? 72 00:03:51,000 --> 00:03:52,640 Spank Loretta on the trunk 73 00:03:52,640 --> 00:03:54,680 and send her to the garage without supper? 74 00:03:55,640 --> 00:03:56,800 I was thinking more like shoot it, 75 00:03:56,840 --> 00:03:58,400 stuff it, and hang it over the fireplace. 76 00:03:59,720 --> 00:04:00,800 I heard that. 77 00:04:01,240 --> 00:04:02,400 I meant, shoot, 78 00:04:02,800 --> 00:04:05,120 it's great having you here, hanging out and stuff. 79 00:04:06,640 --> 00:04:07,560 Fireplace? 80 00:04:09,440 --> 00:04:10,520 Let's face it, Ma, 81 00:04:10,720 --> 00:04:12,840 the steering's loose, the brakes are mushy, 82 00:04:12,880 --> 00:04:14,760 and I've seen better transmissions on tricycles! 83 00:04:15,000 --> 00:04:15,560 Oh yeah? 84 00:04:16,120 --> 00:04:17,600 Well at least my car keeps her 85 00:04:17,600 --> 00:04:18,760 spare tire in her trunk 86 00:04:18,760 --> 00:04:21,040 instead of hanging out over her belt, Porky. 87 00:04:21,800 --> 00:04:23,120 I am not porky! 88 00:04:23,320 --> 00:04:24,720 And don't you go changing the subject! 89 00:04:24,840 --> 00:04:25,960 Well, I'm sorry, I'm 90 00:04:25,960 --> 00:04:28,240 tired of hearing you ragging on your birthplace! 91 00:04:30,080 --> 00:04:30,560 Now, 92 00:04:30,960 --> 00:04:33,200 if you will excuse me, I'm going to go upstairs and unpack. 93 00:04:35,240 --> 00:04:36,760 I think I finally got it all off. 94 00:04:40,640 --> 00:04:42,280 I guess I just didn't get it all out. 95 00:04:42,800 --> 00:04:45,640 Oh, Miley, sweetie, I'm so sorry you were on the wrong end 96 00:04:45,640 --> 00:04:47,480 of one of Loretta's car toots. 97 00:04:47,800 --> 00:04:48,760 That's okay, Mamaw. 98 00:04:49,680 --> 00:04:50,600 Soot happens. 99 00:04:51,560 --> 00:04:51,960 Well, 100 00:04:52,360 --> 00:04:54,760 I'm glad to see that not everybody in this family 101 00:04:54,760 --> 00:04:57,120 blames a poor innocent car on all of their troubles. 102 00:04:57,320 --> 00:04:58,800 Yeah, of course not. 103 00:04:59,480 --> 00:05:00,480 I love that car. 104 00:05:01,640 --> 00:05:02,520 I hate that car! 105 00:05:03,240 --> 00:05:05,360 She cannot keep driving that thing. It's not safe. 106 00:05:05,840 --> 00:05:08,400 Honey, I've been trying to get her to sell it for twenty years. 107 00:05:08,720 --> 00:05:10,560 But every time I bring it up all she does 108 00:05:10,600 --> 00:05:11,440 is tell me I'm fat. 109 00:05:12,080 --> 00:05:14,200 Not one single word about how great my hair looks! 110 00:05:15,120 --> 00:05:17,760 Well, I think it's time to stop trying and start buying. 111 00:05:18,040 --> 00:05:20,120 I'm telling you, Mile, she loves that car. 112 00:05:20,480 --> 00:05:20,880 Yeah, 113 00:05:21,080 --> 00:05:22,720 and she also thought Jackson was the most 114 00:05:22,720 --> 00:05:24,240 beautiful baby in the world! 115 00:05:24,320 --> 00:05:25,120 Until I came along. 116 00:05:25,960 --> 00:05:26,760 Excuse me? 117 00:05:27,080 --> 00:05:28,120 Come on, let's face it, son. 118 00:05:28,160 --> 00:05:29,200 You were the first grandchild, 119 00:05:29,200 --> 00:05:30,360 she was ready to love about anything. 120 00:05:31,600 --> 00:05:32,600 Come on, let's face it, Dad. 121 00:05:33,240 --> 00:05:33,640 You're fat. 122 00:05:33,680 --> 00:05:34,120 Hey! 123 00:05:35,680 --> 00:05:37,520 Come on guys, we're getting off subject here! 124 00:05:38,160 --> 00:05:39,720 She'll forget all about Loretta as 125 00:05:39,760 --> 00:05:40,960 soon as she sees that bright, 126 00:05:41,160 --> 00:05:42,760 shiny, new car. 127 00:05:43,240 --> 00:05:43,920 New car? 128 00:05:44,640 --> 00:05:46,280 What's wrong with Certified Pre-Owned? 129 00:05:46,280 --> 00:05:48,040 I mean, it comes with all the warranties 130 00:05:48,040 --> 00:05:49,840 and it's less expensive. It's just a-- Dad! 131 00:05:50,640 --> 00:05:51,080 Fine. 132 00:05:51,960 --> 00:05:54,200 Trust me, the look on her face will be priceless. 133 00:05:57,880 --> 00:05:59,880 Not quite the look I was going for. 134 00:06:00,800 --> 00:06:02,200 Where is Loretta? 135 00:06:03,480 --> 00:06:04,760 Well, Ma, we traded her in. 136 00:06:05,280 --> 00:06:07,360 For this brand new car! 137 00:06:08,000 --> 00:06:08,960 Yes, that's right. 138 00:06:09,120 --> 00:06:10,720 This brand new beauty comes with 139 00:06:10,960 --> 00:06:13,760 hand tooled leather interior. 140 00:06:13,800 --> 00:06:15,000 Ooh! 141 00:06:15,160 --> 00:06:18,400 Nationwide navigation with real-time traffic. 142 00:06:18,560 --> 00:06:19,600 Ah! 143 00:06:20,600 --> 00:06:23,560 But wait, there's more! Oh, no 144 00:06:23,560 --> 00:06:24,200 there ain't! 145 00:06:24,600 --> 00:06:25,840 How could you? 146 00:06:26,200 --> 00:06:27,160 It was her idea. 147 00:06:36,200 --> 00:06:38,120 Hey, big guy. What can I get you? 148 00:06:38,320 --> 00:06:40,760 I can't decide between the hot dog and the nachos. 149 00:06:41,080 --> 00:06:41,640 Well, 150 00:06:42,000 --> 00:06:44,680 how about I put the hot dog in the nachos, 151 00:06:44,720 --> 00:06:47,200 throw a little jalapeño over that action, and boom! 152 00:06:47,680 --> 00:06:51,360 That's "nacho" ordinary dog, dog! 153 00:06:51,400 --> 00:06:53,080 Awesome! I know! 154 00:06:54,800 --> 00:06:55,520 I've got to admit, 155 00:06:55,960 --> 00:06:57,600 the whole Mr. Happy thing of yours is 156 00:06:57,800 --> 00:06:58,720 so inspiring, 157 00:06:59,160 --> 00:07:00,800 it makes me wish I had a magical horse. 158 00:07:01,160 --> 00:07:02,480 Magical horse? Why? 159 00:07:02,680 --> 00:07:03,880 So it could kick your teeth in. 160 00:07:05,800 --> 00:07:06,520 Oh yeah. 161 00:07:06,880 --> 00:07:08,840 Like a magical horse would do that. 162 00:07:10,400 --> 00:07:11,040 Mine would. 163 00:07:12,000 --> 00:07:13,720 And then it would poop gold coins. 164 00:07:17,200 --> 00:07:18,240 Anyway, 165 00:07:19,360 --> 00:07:20,240 since you've been working here, 166 00:07:20,240 --> 00:07:22,320 my profits are up two-hundred percent. 167 00:07:22,840 --> 00:07:23,240 Wait, 168 00:07:24,120 --> 00:07:26,320 does that mean that I'm getting a raise? 169 00:07:27,600 --> 00:07:29,240 How can I say this so you'll understand? 170 00:07:29,400 --> 00:07:33,000 You'll never get a raise! Never, never, ever! 171 00:07:34,160 --> 00:07:36,600 I mean it's okay. I make a fortune in tips anyway. 172 00:07:38,800 --> 00:07:39,520 Not anymore. 173 00:07:41,960 --> 00:07:44,760 Oh wait, is-is your mom still a cop? Oh yes. 174 00:07:47,360 --> 00:07:49,240 Let me just get rid of these pesky finger prints. 175 00:07:51,240 --> 00:07:52,160 Hey, Ollie-pop! 176 00:07:52,240 --> 00:07:53,320 Hey, Lilly-pop! 177 00:07:53,680 --> 00:07:55,240 Happy one-hundred day-aversary! 178 00:07:56,480 --> 00:07:57,560 Uh, yeah! 179 00:07:58,200 --> 00:07:59,240 Right back at you! 180 00:08:00,160 --> 00:08:01,360 You forgot, didn't you? What? 181 00:08:01,400 --> 00:08:02,080 No, 182 00:08:02,360 --> 00:08:03,720 of course not. In fact, uh, 183 00:08:04,360 --> 00:08:05,840 I put a lot of thought into your gift. 184 00:08:08,360 --> 00:08:10,160 Go buy yourself something nice. 185 00:08:11,560 --> 00:08:13,520 How could you forget our special day? 186 00:08:13,920 --> 00:08:15,600 Really, Ollie-pop, how could you? 187 00:08:16,280 --> 00:08:17,680 I feel your pain, girlfriend. 188 00:08:18,840 --> 00:08:20,520 Okay, listen, I'm sorry. 189 00:08:21,280 --> 00:08:23,440 Happy hundred day-aversary. Oh just forget it! 190 00:08:23,880 --> 00:08:25,760 I did forget it, you got mad at me. 191 00:08:28,920 --> 00:08:31,480 You-- No, no, no! Don't you cutesy face me! 192 00:08:32,080 --> 00:08:32,600 Okay. 193 00:08:33,400 --> 00:08:34,120 Okay? 194 00:08:34,840 --> 00:08:36,200 That's how you make me feel better? 195 00:08:36,720 --> 00:08:38,600 Well, the cutesy face didn't work! 196 00:08:38,640 --> 00:08:39,520 What do you want me to do? 197 00:08:39,800 --> 00:08:41,560 Go to the card store and look in the 198 00:08:41,560 --> 00:08:43,440 hundred day-aversary section and-- 199 00:08:43,680 --> 00:08:45,760 Oh, wait a second, they don't have one of those. 200 00:08:45,760 --> 00:08:47,760 Why? Because it's stupid! 201 00:08:49,800 --> 00:08:51,320 I'll tell you what's stupid! 202 00:08:51,400 --> 00:08:53,360 A hundred and one days with you! 203 00:08:59,640 --> 00:09:02,480 See, this is exactly why I don't have a girlfriend. 204 00:09:02,520 --> 00:09:05,120 Yeah. Yeah that's exactly why you don't have a girlfriend. 205 00:09:05,600 --> 00:09:06,520 Who asked you? 206 00:09:10,840 --> 00:09:11,320 Wow. 207 00:09:11,960 --> 00:09:13,520 I haven't seen her this upset since that 208 00:09:13,560 --> 00:09:15,360 Super Bowl Sunday that Grandpa used 209 00:09:15,400 --> 00:09:16,960 her bra as a chip and dip server. 210 00:09:18,280 --> 00:09:19,800 Somebody should go talk to her. 211 00:09:20,280 --> 00:09:21,280 Somebody with 212 00:09:21,560 --> 00:09:23,320 wisdom and sensitivity. 213 00:09:24,680 --> 00:09:25,400 Whew! 214 00:09:25,960 --> 00:09:26,920 That leaves me out. 215 00:09:28,720 --> 00:09:29,600 The boy's right, Mile. 216 00:09:30,080 --> 00:09:30,480 Good luck. 217 00:09:31,800 --> 00:09:32,400 Me? 218 00:09:32,720 --> 00:09:33,760 She's your mother! 219 00:09:33,840 --> 00:09:35,360 What? That woman would skin my hide. 220 00:09:35,360 --> 00:09:36,280 She wouldn't hit a girl. 221 00:09:37,560 --> 00:09:38,080 Fine. 222 00:09:43,400 --> 00:09:44,720 Not in the mood, Miley. 223 00:09:45,800 --> 00:09:46,680 How'd you know it was me? 224 00:09:47,480 --> 00:09:49,760 Because the other two don't have the guts. 225 00:09:50,480 --> 00:09:51,360 Tell me about it. 226 00:09:51,640 --> 00:09:53,640 Who do you think kills all the spiders around here? 227 00:09:57,240 --> 00:09:57,680 Mamaw, 228 00:09:59,160 --> 00:10:00,120 we really are sorry. 229 00:10:00,240 --> 00:10:01,760 We thought that you would love a new car. 230 00:10:02,400 --> 00:10:03,440 Well, you thought wrong. 231 00:10:04,320 --> 00:10:06,440 But, Loretta's just so old and run down. 232 00:10:07,360 --> 00:10:08,080 Maybe to you. 233 00:10:13,080 --> 00:10:15,680 To me that old girl is like part of the family. 234 00:10:16,560 --> 00:10:17,680 When I get into that car, 235 00:10:17,720 --> 00:10:19,840 I can still smell your grandpa's hair tonic. 236 00:10:20,920 --> 00:10:23,040 And I can still hear your daddy shouting 237 00:10:23,120 --> 00:10:24,760 "don't leave me" as I shove him out 238 00:10:24,800 --> 00:10:26,480 the door on his first day of kindergarten. 239 00:10:28,240 --> 00:10:29,560 That car is like half of my 240 00:10:29,840 --> 00:10:30,240 life. 241 00:10:31,240 --> 00:10:32,600 I'm sorry, Mamaw, I just-- 242 00:10:33,040 --> 00:10:34,120 I never thought of it that way. 243 00:10:34,720 --> 00:10:35,600 Well, there's the problem. 244 00:10:36,080 --> 00:10:36,880 None of you thought. 245 00:10:37,480 --> 00:10:38,880 So, if you will excuse me, 246 00:10:38,880 --> 00:10:40,720 I'm going to go take a little walk by the ocean. 247 00:10:41,720 --> 00:10:44,280 Unless you Californians thought it was too old 248 00:10:44,320 --> 00:10:46,520 and you've replaced it with that fancy mineral water 249 00:10:46,560 --> 00:10:48,360 that tastes like you washed an orange in it. 250 00:10:55,200 --> 00:10:57,280 Yeah, I understand. Thank you very much. 251 00:10:58,360 --> 00:11:00,000 So, are they going to take the car back? 252 00:11:00,040 --> 00:11:02,240 Or, will--me--somebody--me--have to keep it? 253 00:11:02,600 --> 00:11:02,920 Me. 254 00:11:03,800 --> 00:11:05,800 Sorry--you--they said they'd take it back--you. 255 00:11:05,840 --> 00:11:07,240 So somebody's out of luck. 256 00:11:07,400 --> 00:11:07,720 You. 257 00:11:09,760 --> 00:11:10,160 So, uh, 258 00:11:10,280 --> 00:11:11,920 great! We've just got to go down and get Loretta back. 259 00:11:12,240 --> 00:11:13,680 I'd love to, but the problem is they've 260 00:11:13,720 --> 00:11:15,280 already sold Loretta to the junkyard. 261 00:11:15,640 --> 00:11:16,640 So, we go buy her back. 262 00:11:16,640 --> 00:11:18,080 I mean, I wouldn't call that a problem. 263 00:11:22,360 --> 00:11:24,600 Here's your car! 264 00:11:25,680 --> 00:11:26,400 Now this 265 00:11:26,960 --> 00:11:27,840 I call a problem! 266 00:11:36,000 --> 00:11:37,800 W-We don't know for sure that this is Loretta. 267 00:11:37,960 --> 00:11:39,440 There's only one way to find out. 268 00:11:41,520 --> 00:11:41,960 Yep, 269 00:11:42,280 --> 00:11:43,440 Grandpa's hair tonic. 270 00:11:44,720 --> 00:11:46,160 And one of Mamaw's half-eaten 271 00:11:46,200 --> 00:11:47,480 butterscotch candies. 272 00:11:51,640 --> 00:11:53,440 This is why we usually leave him at home. 273 00:11:53,920 --> 00:11:54,560 Uh-huh. 274 00:11:55,000 --> 00:11:55,560 Say now, 275 00:11:56,040 --> 00:11:57,440 did you want this delivered or 276 00:11:57,480 --> 00:11:59,040 did you want to drive it out of here? 277 00:12:02,280 --> 00:12:04,080 Sorry, just a little junkyard humor. 278 00:12:04,680 --> 00:12:06,640 Seriously, delivery is a hundred bucks. 279 00:12:08,160 --> 00:12:10,120 Kids, there's only one thing left to do. 280 00:12:11,120 --> 00:12:12,320 You and I are going camping. 281 00:12:12,360 --> 00:12:13,720 Miley, you call us when she leaves. 282 00:12:14,280 --> 00:12:15,600 Thank you, chicken and 283 00:12:15,880 --> 00:12:17,160 chicken byproducts. 284 00:12:18,320 --> 00:12:19,760 You know, there's got to be an intelligent 285 00:12:19,840 --> 00:12:21,240 and logical solution. 286 00:12:22,480 --> 00:12:22,760 Ooh, 287 00:12:23,440 --> 00:12:23,920 I got it. 288 00:12:24,160 --> 00:12:24,720 How about we 289 00:12:24,840 --> 00:12:26,680 pour some water on it until it pops up! 290 00:12:28,040 --> 00:12:29,240 You know, like one of those cute little 291 00:12:29,280 --> 00:12:30,320 spongy dinosaur thingies? 292 00:12:30,640 --> 00:12:32,160 Glug, glug, glug, glug. 293 00:12:34,800 --> 00:12:36,080 Let me get this straight, 294 00:12:36,920 --> 00:12:39,800 you generally leave him at home, but you bring her? 295 00:12:41,040 --> 00:12:42,120 Welcome to my world. 296 00:12:43,720 --> 00:12:45,520 Just face it, Miles, it's over. 297 00:12:45,560 --> 00:12:47,760 All right, i-it's not like the time you went to Washington 298 00:12:47,800 --> 00:12:49,600 and I forgot to feed your goldfish 299 00:12:49,720 --> 00:12:51,680 so I replaced it with a look-alike and you never knew. 300 00:12:52,600 --> 00:12:54,840 You flushed Scaley Joel Osment? 301 00:12:56,000 --> 00:12:56,800 Hey, hey, 302 00:12:57,440 --> 00:12:59,720 now if you folks are looking to replace this car, 303 00:12:59,960 --> 00:13:02,200 I've got one in the back, looks just like her. 304 00:13:04,240 --> 00:13:05,720 Hey, Dad, that does look like Loretta. 305 00:13:06,000 --> 00:13:08,000 I don't know, something about it just don't feel right. 306 00:13:08,400 --> 00:13:08,960 Well, 307 00:13:09,360 --> 00:13:11,720 there he is, Robby Stewart, 308 00:13:11,760 --> 00:13:14,680 the porky son who broke his mamma's heart! 309 00:13:16,400 --> 00:13:16,960 We'll take it. 310 00:13:29,240 --> 00:13:30,400 W-W-W-Where's the money? 311 00:13:30,480 --> 00:13:31,920 Th-There's no money in here! 312 00:13:33,000 --> 00:13:34,720 It's been a slow day. 313 00:13:36,000 --> 00:13:37,160 What are you talking about? 314 00:13:37,440 --> 00:13:38,600 The beach is packed! 315 00:13:40,360 --> 00:13:42,560 What could possibly be keeping the people away? 316 00:13:43,040 --> 00:13:44,160 Excuse me, mister. 317 00:13:44,720 --> 00:13:46,160 What do you want? 318 00:13:47,680 --> 00:13:48,360 A hot dog? 319 00:13:48,520 --> 00:13:49,280 Why? 320 00:13:50,160 --> 00:13:51,040 I love hot dogs! 321 00:13:51,320 --> 00:13:52,280 Well, 322 00:13:52,760 --> 00:13:54,160 it doesn't matter what you love. 323 00:13:54,200 --> 00:13:55,560 Because sooner or later your 324 00:13:55,600 --> 00:13:57,720 precious little hot dog is going to turn on you 325 00:13:57,720 --> 00:14:00,280 because you forgot its stupid hundred day- aversary! 326 00:14:01,040 --> 00:14:02,440 Okay, I'll have nachos. 327 00:14:02,480 --> 00:14:04,120 They hate you, too! 328 00:14:04,440 --> 00:14:05,320 Live with it! 329 00:14:06,480 --> 00:14:07,440 What a freak. 330 00:14:11,160 --> 00:14:12,120 What are you doing? 331 00:14:12,320 --> 00:14:13,760 I heard change in his pocket! 332 00:14:14,080 --> 00:14:15,520 Change that should have been mine! 333 00:14:15,880 --> 00:14:16,760 Snap out of it! 334 00:14:16,960 --> 00:14:18,400 I want Mister Happy back! 335 00:14:18,400 --> 00:14:19,800 Okay. Hey, you know what? 336 00:14:20,640 --> 00:14:23,200 Mister Happy doesn't live in here anymore. 337 00:14:25,000 --> 00:14:25,840 I quit. 338 00:14:26,960 --> 00:14:27,960 You can't quit! 339 00:14:28,400 --> 00:14:30,040 You need to get back here and get happy! 340 00:14:30,080 --> 00:14:31,320 Rico, what's the point? 341 00:14:33,200 --> 00:14:34,360 What's the point? 342 00:14:35,000 --> 00:14:35,640 Money! 343 00:14:35,960 --> 00:14:37,360 W-What other point is there? 344 00:14:40,840 --> 00:14:42,160 Oh, okay, fine! 345 00:14:42,400 --> 00:14:43,120 Go! 346 00:14:43,880 --> 00:14:45,200 I don't need you! 347 00:14:45,880 --> 00:14:47,400 I can be Mister H appy! 348 00:14:47,640 --> 00:14:49,840 Yeah right! Sure! 349 00:14:50,120 --> 00:14:50,640 Again, 350 00:14:51,040 --> 00:14:52,160 who asked you? 351 00:14:58,560 --> 00:15:01,040 This is in way better shape than Loretta. 352 00:15:01,120 --> 00:15:03,080 Yeah, what kind of junk dealer are you? 353 00:15:03,080 --> 00:15:04,320 Hey, I'm sorry, 354 00:15:04,320 --> 00:15:05,800 this is the worst I can do. 355 00:15:06,480 --> 00:15:07,200 Hollywood! 356 00:15:07,560 --> 00:15:09,760 The longer I'm here the weirder it gets. 357 00:15:10,680 --> 00:15:12,120 Hey, you know what, kids? It's all right. 358 00:15:12,920 --> 00:15:15,120 A few dents, some scrapes, scratches, 359 00:15:15,200 --> 00:15:16,880 forty years of assorted smells and 360 00:15:17,760 --> 00:15:19,320 we'll be able to give the old rattle trap 361 00:15:19,320 --> 00:15:20,440 back to the old rattle trap. 362 00:15:22,480 --> 00:15:23,520 She called me fat! 363 00:15:24,160 --> 00:15:25,760 Well, but what about Mamaw's seat 364 00:15:25,800 --> 00:15:27,680 covers and her fluffy steering wheel 365 00:15:27,680 --> 00:15:28,920 thingy and all the other stuff? 366 00:15:29,280 --> 00:15:31,160 Oh, no, I-I took that all out 367 00:15:31,200 --> 00:15:32,320 before I crushed her. 368 00:15:32,800 --> 00:15:33,560 I've got it right here. 369 00:15:35,720 --> 00:15:37,080 You are a life saver! 370 00:15:37,120 --> 00:15:38,840 I just like to make people happy. 371 00:15:39,200 --> 00:15:40,200 That'll be fifty bucks. 372 00:15:41,400 --> 00:15:42,080 Fifty bucks? 373 00:15:42,320 --> 00:15:43,120 Who's that making happy? 374 00:15:43,480 --> 00:15:43,840 Me. 375 00:15:45,240 --> 00:15:46,840 Come on man, we need this stuff. 376 00:15:46,920 --> 00:15:48,520 Sorry, I did not know that. 377 00:15:49,160 --> 00:15:50,120 Let's call it a hundred. 378 00:15:53,720 --> 00:15:54,920 Way to haggle, Porky. 379 00:16:04,240 --> 00:16:05,600 Ah, there. 380 00:16:06,160 --> 00:16:08,520 Now it looks just like the time I snuck out after 381 00:16:08,600 --> 00:16:11,040 curfew and fell all the way from the second floor window. 382 00:16:11,560 --> 00:16:13,480 Landed right on the old keister. 383 00:16:14,720 --> 00:16:16,280 Ever since then this cheek's been 384 00:16:16,320 --> 00:16:18,600 just a little flatter than the other one. 385 00:16:19,320 --> 00:16:20,440 Wait, so you, uh, 386 00:16:20,920 --> 00:16:22,280 you snuck out after curfew? 387 00:16:22,800 --> 00:16:24,040 Did I say snuck out? 388 00:16:24,480 --> 00:16:26,280 I meant I was painting the side of the house. 389 00:16:27,880 --> 00:16:28,400 Well, uh, 390 00:16:28,400 --> 00:16:30,120 I heard a little rumor that Miley might be 391 00:16:30,120 --> 00:16:31,880 painting the side of the house Saturday night. 392 00:16:32,400 --> 00:16:33,320 I'm just saying. 393 00:16:34,720 --> 00:16:35,160 Now, 394 00:16:35,520 --> 00:16:37,120 to take care of that time Mamaw got a 395 00:16:37,160 --> 00:16:39,280 little too close to the town police car. 396 00:16:42,480 --> 00:16:43,080 Nice! 397 00:16:43,880 --> 00:16:44,440 Okay, 398 00:16:45,040 --> 00:16:47,000 I think I got everything that we need. 399 00:16:47,880 --> 00:16:49,240 I've got 400 00:16:50,320 --> 00:16:51,920 Grandpa's hair tonic. 401 00:16:54,360 --> 00:16:55,040 And 402 00:16:56,080 --> 00:16:57,520 ketchup for in between the seats. 403 00:17:02,520 --> 00:17:03,160 Now, 404 00:17:03,280 --> 00:17:04,640 mix it all together. 405 00:17:06,480 --> 00:17:07,080 There we go. 406 00:17:07,480 --> 00:17:09,200 And just a little orange soda for, uh, 407 00:17:09,520 --> 00:17:10,760 stickying up the dash. 408 00:17:14,320 --> 00:17:15,800 You know, this is coming together a whole lot 409 00:17:15,880 --> 00:17:16,880 better than I thought it would. 410 00:17:17,680 --> 00:17:19,200 Oh, you know, there's something missing. 411 00:17:21,560 --> 00:17:22,160 You're right. 412 00:17:22,560 --> 00:17:25,040 It's the subtle hint of cat pee in the back seat. 413 00:17:25,320 --> 00:17:26,400 I'm way ahead of you, Daddy. 414 00:17:28,280 --> 00:17:29,640 Say hello to Burt. 415 00:17:31,240 --> 00:17:32,840 And, uh, just FYI, 416 00:17:33,160 --> 00:17:35,240 that's his second bowl of milk. So 417 00:17:35,440 --> 00:17:37,240 he should be ready to spring a leak any minute. 418 00:17:41,560 --> 00:17:41,960 Yeah, 419 00:17:42,400 --> 00:17:44,720 yeah, that's brilliant. Look, he's not doing anything. 420 00:17:45,560 --> 00:17:48,000 Well, maybe he just needs a little encouragement. 421 00:17:48,600 --> 00:17:49,640 Go, Burt, go. 422 00:17:50,000 --> 00:17:51,120 Go, Burt, go. 423 00:17:51,400 --> 00:17:52,520 Go, Burt, go. 424 00:17:52,800 --> 00:17:53,920 Go, Burt, go. 425 00:17:54,080 --> 00:17:55,640 Go, Burt! 426 00:17:58,240 --> 00:17:59,720 You know how I'm always complaining the 427 00:17:59,760 --> 00:18:02,000 three of us don't do enough stuff together? 428 00:18:03,800 --> 00:18:04,440 I'm done with that. 429 00:18:09,560 --> 00:18:10,040 Rico! 430 00:18:10,440 --> 00:18:11,760 Rico, have you seen Oliver? 431 00:18:11,800 --> 00:18:13,440 Or should I say the most wonderful, 432 00:18:13,480 --> 00:18:15,520 beautiful, sensitive guy in the whole world! 433 00:18:15,720 --> 00:18:16,840 Whoa, what happened? 434 00:18:17,240 --> 00:18:18,720 I thought you never wanted to see him again. 435 00:18:19,000 --> 00:18:21,080 Oh, that was before he wrote me this. 436 00:18:22,960 --> 00:18:25,240 "Lilly, my soul, my life, my love. 437 00:18:25,960 --> 00:18:28,000 My angel sent from heaven above. 438 00:18:28,320 --> 00:18:30,280 Without you near my heart is broken. 439 00:18:30,640 --> 00:18:33,040 Best regards, Oliver Oken." 440 00:18:35,400 --> 00:18:37,800 Who knew he was so deep? I know! 441 00:18:39,080 --> 00:18:42,120 There he is! Run to him, child, run! 442 00:18:42,160 --> 00:18:43,960 Oh, Oliver, I'm so sorry! 443 00:18:44,400 --> 00:18:44,920 You are? 444 00:18:44,960 --> 00:18:47,120 Yes, yes, and I forgive you. 445 00:18:47,160 --> 00:18:49,040 You do? Yes, and I love your poem. 446 00:18:49,240 --> 00:18:50,000 My poem? 447 00:18:50,320 --> 00:18:51,920 Yes, uh, the beautiful poem you 448 00:18:51,960 --> 00:18:53,280 wrote her expressing your love. 449 00:18:56,040 --> 00:18:57,680 I am so happy! 450 00:18:57,720 --> 00:18:59,080 Well, then I'm happy too! 451 00:18:59,320 --> 00:19:01,280 Yeah, we are all happy! 452 00:19:01,720 --> 00:19:04,280 Happy, happy, happy! Now get back to work. 453 00:19:04,280 --> 00:19:05,240 Okay! Okay. 454 00:19:05,560 --> 00:19:09,840 I'll miss you, I'll miss you too, Ollie-pop! Oh, you're so cute. Oh, Lilly-pop! 455 00:19:13,440 --> 00:19:15,120 Another reason I don't have a girlfriend. 456 00:19:15,440 --> 00:19:17,680 Yeah right! Yeah right. Yeah. 457 00:19:18,080 --> 00:19:19,880 Oh, get a life, people! 458 00:19:25,160 --> 00:19:27,280 Mamaw! Come here! Come on, Mamaw! Come on out! 459 00:19:27,320 --> 00:19:29,240 What in tarnation is all of the noise-- 460 00:19:30,720 --> 00:19:31,840 Loretta! 461 00:19:32,760 --> 00:19:34,400 You're back! 462 00:19:37,880 --> 00:19:38,520 Whew! 463 00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:42,640 Oh, I missed you. Aw. 464 00:19:42,680 --> 00:19:44,320 Sorry we tried to separate you two. 465 00:19:44,400 --> 00:19:46,720 Oh, you were just doing what you thought was right. 466 00:19:47,120 --> 00:19:49,840 Even though you were wronger than tofu bacon. 467 00:19:51,080 --> 00:19:53,480 I mean, really, what is the point of that stuff? 468 00:19:54,720 --> 00:19:56,160 She looks great, doesn't she? 469 00:19:56,320 --> 00:19:57,520 I mean, look at that scrape. 470 00:19:57,560 --> 00:19:58,800 If that doesn't say Loretta, 471 00:19:58,960 --> 00:19:59,920 I don't know what does. 472 00:19:59,960 --> 00:20:00,600 Jackson. Look, 473 00:20:00,800 --> 00:20:03,800 all I'm saying is, you can't duplicate a scratch like that. 474 00:20:04,400 --> 00:20:05,560 It'd take a genius. 475 00:20:05,760 --> 00:20:07,880 Yep, and we don't got any of those here, 476 00:20:07,920 --> 00:20:09,240 so, uh, how about we go inside 477 00:20:09,240 --> 00:20:10,440 and have a good laugh about it, huh? 478 00:20:10,440 --> 00:20:11,520 I'll start. 479 00:20:12,960 --> 00:20:13,440 Walk. 480 00:20:14,640 --> 00:20:15,960 You go on ahead, son. I just-- 481 00:20:16,120 --> 00:20:17,760 I want to have a moment with my girl, here. 482 00:20:18,000 --> 00:20:19,120 Take all the time you need. 483 00:20:19,560 --> 00:20:20,320 Check out the dent! 484 00:20:20,320 --> 00:20:21,680 Let's go. Ow, ow, okay. 485 00:20:33,840 --> 00:20:34,680 You know, don't you? 486 00:20:36,080 --> 00:20:37,080 Of course I do. 487 00:20:40,960 --> 00:20:42,600 I really am sorry, Mamaw. 488 00:20:42,680 --> 00:20:44,200 We tried to get her back, it was just-- 489 00:20:44,960 --> 00:20:45,600 We were too late. 490 00:20:46,760 --> 00:20:47,360 It's okay. 491 00:20:48,400 --> 00:20:49,040 Get on in here. 492 00:20:55,720 --> 00:20:56,760 Are you sure you're not mad? 493 00:20:57,480 --> 00:20:58,880 How can I be mad at a family 494 00:20:58,960 --> 00:21:00,120 that loves me so much 495 00:21:00,160 --> 00:21:02,240 that they would go to all this trouble to help me hold onto something 496 00:21:02,240 --> 00:21:03,960 that I should've gotten rid of when I tossed 497 00:21:04,040 --> 00:21:05,520 my spandex disco pants. 498 00:21:07,160 --> 00:21:08,520 I wish I could've seen those. 499 00:21:08,720 --> 00:21:09,680 Yeah you do. 500 00:21:10,280 --> 00:21:11,680 I was foxy. 501 00:21:14,920 --> 00:21:16,000 But, what about all your memories? 502 00:21:16,760 --> 00:21:17,720 I still have those. 503 00:21:18,000 --> 00:21:20,240 And now thanks to you all, I have another one. 504 00:21:21,920 --> 00:21:23,040 Oh, sweetie. 505 00:21:23,640 --> 00:21:24,640 You're not crying, are you? 506 00:21:25,000 --> 00:21:25,880 No, it's just, 507 00:21:26,360 --> 00:21:27,800 that cat did a good job. 508 00:21:28,480 --> 00:21:29,280 Ew! 509 00:21:31,960 --> 00:21:33,920 Thanks for changing your mind about the car, Ma. 510 00:21:34,160 --> 00:21:35,920 I'm going to feel a whole lot better knowing you're 511 00:21:35,920 --> 00:21:36,760 traveling in this. 512 00:21:38,200 --> 00:21:39,840 And we really are sorry about Loretta. 513 00:21:39,960 --> 00:21:41,480 Oh, I know you are. And don't you 514 00:21:41,520 --> 00:21:43,680 fret none. I will always have her in my heart. 515 00:21:43,920 --> 00:21:46,560 We'll miss you, Mamaw. I'll miss you, too, babies. 516 00:21:46,560 --> 00:21:46,920 Well, 517 00:21:47,480 --> 00:21:49,360 I guess I'd better hit the road. 518 00:21:50,080 --> 00:21:51,880 Hey, and you don't have to worry about directions. 519 00:21:51,880 --> 00:21:53,840 I've already programmed the GPS. 520 00:21:53,880 --> 00:21:55,720 You won't need a map the whole way there. 521 00:21:55,840 --> 00:21:57,800 Oh! Bye! Drive safe, Mamaw. 522 00:21:59,120 --> 00:22:00,280 In fifty feet, 523 00:22:00,760 --> 00:22:01,440 turn right. 524 00:22:01,880 --> 00:22:02,880 Well, thank you, darling. 525 00:22:03,160 --> 00:22:04,520 In forty-five feet, 526 00:22:05,160 --> 00:22:05,840 turn right. 527 00:22:06,160 --> 00:22:07,040 Okay, I got it. 528 00:22:07,240 --> 00:22:08,360 In forty feet, 529 00:22:08,960 --> 00:22:09,600 turn right. 530 00:22:09,640 --> 00:22:11,680 You going to do this all the way back to Tennessee? 531 00:22:11,680 --> 00:22:12,960 In thirty-five feet, 532 00:22:13,480 --> 00:22:14,120 turn right. 533 00:22:14,160 --> 00:22:15,160 Oh, shut up! 534 00:22:16,640 --> 00:22:18,440 You programmed it so she couldn't turn it off, 535 00:22:18,440 --> 00:22:18,920 didn't you? 536 00:22:19,240 --> 00:22:20,440 Teach her to call me fat.