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Subtitles By: Robin808
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Think about it.
Right on the beach,
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ocean breezes, blue skies, seagulls.
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- All yours for the taking.
- It's a timeshare.
4
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Well, it's called a timeshare,
5
00:00:29,531 --> 00:00:32,615
but the truth is,
for the two weeks you're at the condo,
6
00:00:32,784 --> 00:00:34,444
you're not sharing anything.
7
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You're not sharing the bathroom,
not sharing the toaster, nothing.
8
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Nada. Zip.
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You are the mistress of all you survey.
10
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My nephew looked up the neighbourhood
on the computer.
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Your nephew?
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Mrs Darby.
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He said the condo was
in a bad neighbourhood.
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Blacks.
15
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You're right. You're right.
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The condo is in a rather
poor majority black neighbourhood.
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And you know what?
I'm glad you brought it up.
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Seriously.
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Otherwise, I might have done something
that I'd be ashamed of later.
20
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And that would be
to sell you that timeshare.
21
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- You would not feel safe there.
- No, I wouldn't.
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Of course you wouldn't.
How could you?
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We all know,
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and I say this at the risk
of sounding a little racist,
25
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black dudes love white women.
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Love 'em. I don't know
if it's genetic or if it's society.
27
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We can argue nature versus nurture
all day, but it's a scientific fact
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that black men can't get enough
of white women.
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Don't think a woman of your age
would be safe from their advances.
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00:02:03,374 --> 00:02:04,917
No, ma'am.
31
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These big black bucks
don't care whether you're young or old,
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skinny or fat,
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walking or with two wrinkled stumps
right below the knees.
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They want your white flesh.
They want it bad.
35
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Truth be told, I'm part black myself.
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And if it wasn't for my wife,
I'd be bending you over the desk
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doing you doggy-style right now.
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I can just imagine you there,
all alone in that big condo,
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awash in a sea of Negro cock.
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I'll... I'll take it.
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Smart move. Sign your Jane Hancock
on the dotted line.
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- You can't go in there.
- Here you go.
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- Stan Minton.
- I'll be with you in a second.
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Go on. Sign it.
45
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Stan Minton,
you're under arrest for fraud.
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Anything you say will be
used against you in a court.
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It's just a little mix-up.
Go on, sign it.
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- You white Jezebel!
- I'll call Mal!
49
00:03:00,932 --> 00:03:04,550
You're gonna regret this!
Call my attorney!
50
00:03:07,981 --> 00:03:10,650
Madam Foreman,
have you reached a verdict?
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00:03:10,817 --> 00:03:13,853
- We have, Your Honour.
- Please hand it to the bailiff.
52
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Will the defendant please rise?
53
00:03:19,909 --> 00:03:22,198
Madam Foreman,
how do you find the defendant?
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00:03:22,370 --> 00:03:26,320
We, the jury,
find the defendant guilty.
55
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- What?
- Thank you, Madam Foreman.
56
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- That bitch!
- Stanley, please, quiet.
57
00:03:32,922 --> 00:03:35,923
Sentencing will be tomorrow at 10am.
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00:03:38,219 --> 00:03:41,553
- What the fuck just happened in there?
- You lost, Stanley.
59
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I didn't lose.
You're the lawyer, you lost.
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I'm truly sorry.
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Damn it, man! I'm rich!
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I wanted some of that O.J. justice.
63
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Maybe the judge will give probation.
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No. In this state, first-degree fraud
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carries a minimum
of three to five years.
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I got it!
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00:04:01,576 --> 00:04:04,328
- We bribe the judge.
- I'm not gonna bribe the judge.
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00:04:04,495 --> 00:04:06,572
- Bribe him.
- I'm not gonna bribe him.
69
00:04:06,748 --> 00:04:08,242
- Bribe him!
- Oh, please.
70
00:04:08,416 --> 00:04:10,076
- Bribe him!
- No!
71
00:04:10,251 --> 00:04:12,921
I don't practise that kind of law,
and I never will.
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00:04:13,087 --> 00:04:15,376
You wanna bribe the judge?
Be my guest.
73
00:04:15,548 --> 00:04:19,961
I'm sure any shyster on the street
will be happy to do it for you.
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00:04:29,270 --> 00:04:33,054
Mal? You're fired.
75
00:04:34,692 --> 00:04:37,729
Mr Popper,
is your client ready for sentencing?
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He is, Your Honour.
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Anything you'd like to say
before the court passes sentence?
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00:04:44,035 --> 00:04:47,867
Your Honour, my client
has been convicted
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of fraud in the first degree.
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A crime of which he is innocent.
81
00:04:54,087 --> 00:04:57,503
But even if he were guilty
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and his customers were defrauded,
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00:05:00,593 --> 00:05:04,971
isn't it better that Mr Minton,
as a resident of Los Angeles,
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00:05:05,139 --> 00:05:08,674
receive the money,
thereby keeping it in the community,
85
00:05:08,852 --> 00:05:12,552
as opposed to some gypsies
or travelling Mexicans,
86
00:05:12,730 --> 00:05:16,858
who would have taken the money
out of the community?
87
00:05:18,820 --> 00:05:21,572
Please take that into consideration.
88
00:05:22,907 --> 00:05:28,447
Mr Minton, you are hereby sentenced to
serve a term of no less than three years
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at the Verlaine State
Correctional Facility.
90
00:05:31,541 --> 00:05:34,661
Normally, your sentence
would begin immediately.
91
00:05:34,836 --> 00:05:39,664
However, I'm going to delay
your incarceration for six months
92
00:05:39,841 --> 00:05:44,170
so that you may...
reorganise the charity
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that you've established
to teach music to retarded children.
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00:05:49,976 --> 00:05:53,475
Thank you, judge.
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Court is adjourned.
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00:05:57,025 --> 00:06:01,069
- Teach music to retarded children?
- It sounded good at the time.
97
00:06:01,237 --> 00:06:03,444
- I thought you were gonna bribe him.
- I did.
98
00:06:03,615 --> 00:06:06,319
Hundred grand in Krugerrand
doesn't go too far now.
99
00:06:06,492 --> 00:06:08,236
- Did we win?
- No. I don't get it.
100
00:06:08,411 --> 00:06:10,534
You bribe the judge
and I get three years?
101
00:06:10,705 --> 00:06:12,745
Mandatory.
The judge couldn't fix that.
102
00:06:12,916 --> 00:06:15,489
Now you got six months
to set your affairs in order.
103
00:06:15,668 --> 00:06:17,328
My affairs are already in order.
104
00:06:18,671 --> 00:06:23,962
My legal opinion is that you take
a Brazilian vacation. Permanently.
105
00:06:24,135 --> 00:06:26,424
Sounds like fun.
106
00:06:26,596 --> 00:06:28,174
I can't do that.
107
00:06:28,348 --> 00:06:30,921
Those Krugerrands were the last
liquid asset I had.
108
00:06:31,100 --> 00:06:33,223
The rest of my money
is frozen in the bank.
109
00:06:33,394 --> 00:06:35,968
I'm not gonna run
and leave seven million behind.
110
00:06:36,147 --> 00:06:39,184
Well, Stan,
my old man had a saying:
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"You walk through a locker room,
you're gonna see some dick. "
112
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- What's that supposed to mean?
- It means you rip off enough people,
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eventually you're gonna go to jail.
114
00:06:50,954 --> 00:06:52,745
Thanks, that's really comforting.
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00:06:52,914 --> 00:06:57,375
Hey, I'm a crooked lawyer.
I know I'm going to jail someday.
116
00:06:57,544 --> 00:07:00,913
You don't see me crying about it.
117
00:07:11,724 --> 00:07:14,595
Stan, slow down. You're gonna choke.
118
00:07:14,769 --> 00:07:18,138
I gotta eat now.
I hear that prison food is real crap.
119
00:07:18,815 --> 00:07:22,433
I'm real glad we have six months
together before you have to go to...
120
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- You know.
- Tell me about it.
121
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I could be in jail right now.
Popper's one hell of a lawyer.
122
00:07:29,701 --> 00:07:32,322
I'm gonna be awfully lonely
while you're gone.
123
00:07:32,495 --> 00:07:36,623
I know, sweetheart.
But I think I get conjugal visits.
124
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I can probably stick it to you
once a month or so. Pretty good.
125
00:07:39,961 --> 00:07:42,001
Oh, sure, that's great.
126
00:07:42,172 --> 00:07:43,879
- But I was thinking...
- Mm-hm.
127
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...maybe we could do something now
so I wouldn't be so lonely later.
128
00:07:49,470 --> 00:07:51,262
Like what?
129
00:07:51,431 --> 00:07:56,009
Like maybe we could make a baby.
130
00:07:59,147 --> 00:08:00,689
Mindy, are you crazy?
131
00:08:00,857 --> 00:08:03,015
- I just...
- I'm gonna be gone three years.
132
00:08:03,193 --> 00:08:06,443
Five at the max. What are we gonna do
with the kid when I get out?
133
00:08:06,613 --> 00:08:08,605
Give it up for adoption?
That's cruel.
134
00:08:08,781 --> 00:08:11,818
I thought maybe we could keep it.
135
00:08:11,993 --> 00:08:14,116
Mindy, how many times
have we gone over this?
136
00:08:14,287 --> 00:08:16,659
It's selfish to bring
a child into this world.
137
00:08:16,831 --> 00:08:19,666
A world full of suffering
and hunger and war.
138
00:08:19,834 --> 00:08:22,586
- It's just... selfish!
- I know.
139
00:08:22,754 --> 00:08:25,541
Plus, a kid would totally
cramp our lifestyle.
140
00:08:25,715 --> 00:08:29,760
We couldn't go on vacation when we
wanted, they break stuff, they cry.
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00:08:29,928 --> 00:08:32,466
You'd get stretch marks.
142
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That's right. Stretch marks.
143
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Scary stuff, huh?
144
00:08:36,768 --> 00:08:39,971
I just let you
walk all over me.
145
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Oh, Mindy, come on.
146
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OK, Mindy, you can get a dog.
147
00:08:46,069 --> 00:08:48,986
After I leave!
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00:08:49,155 --> 00:08:51,064
Your other steak, sir.
149
00:09:22,146 --> 00:09:25,350
- What do you want, doll?
- Put some Scotch in this.
150
00:09:26,568 --> 00:09:31,028
- We got whiskey.
- Not as good, but it'll have to do.
151
00:09:31,197 --> 00:09:35,065
All right. That'll be 75 cents.
152
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Good deal.
153
00:09:39,163 --> 00:09:43,078
- Keep the change.
- Ooh! Well...
154
00:09:45,295 --> 00:09:47,086
Ah! Give me another one, honey.
155
00:10:01,269 --> 00:10:02,680
Do you got a problem?
156
00:10:04,606 --> 00:10:06,349
No. No, I...
157
00:10:06,524 --> 00:10:10,522
I was just wondering...
you've been to prison, right?
158
00:10:10,695 --> 00:10:12,486
You do have a problem.
159
00:10:12,655 --> 00:10:15,859
No, I... I'm going to prison.
160
00:10:16,034 --> 00:10:19,153
But I've never been there before
and I was just thinking maybe
161
00:10:19,329 --> 00:10:20,989
you could give me some pointers.
162
00:10:22,290 --> 00:10:26,288
- I'll pay you 100 bucks.
- Just for talking?
163
00:10:28,505 --> 00:10:31,624
- How much time did you get?
- Three to five.
164
00:10:31,799 --> 00:10:34,172
- Where at?
- Verlaine.
165
00:10:34,344 --> 00:10:39,385
Verlaine? That's fucked, Stan.
Guards just don't give a damn.
166
00:10:39,557 --> 00:10:43,175
They let the cons beat the shit
out of one another all day.
167
00:10:43,353 --> 00:10:44,895
How am I gonna do in there?
168
00:10:45,063 --> 00:10:48,514
I mean, if you saw me,
would you beat the shit out of me?
169
00:10:50,026 --> 00:10:51,485
I'd probably rape ya.
170
00:10:53,196 --> 00:10:55,603
- You'd rape me?
- Yeah.
171
00:10:57,075 --> 00:11:00,823
So it's true, huh?
A lot of guys turn gay in prison?
172
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I'm always gay.
I only rape people in prison.
173
00:11:04,874 --> 00:11:08,409
- You're gay?
- Yeah. This is a gay bar.
174
00:11:08,586 --> 00:11:11,291
Whoo!
175
00:11:11,464 --> 00:11:13,124
Let's do this thing.
176
00:11:16,094 --> 00:11:17,125
Whoo!
177
00:11:17,303 --> 00:11:21,846
Look, rape isn't an act of sex.
Rape is an act of violence.
178
00:11:22,016 --> 00:11:25,183
And in prison society,
it's all about violence.
179
00:11:25,353 --> 00:11:27,678
You're judged by how bad
other cons fear you.
180
00:11:27,856 --> 00:11:30,940
Raping a dude is the ultimate way
of beating him down.
181
00:11:31,109 --> 00:11:33,185
It means you're one bad motherfucker.
182
00:11:33,361 --> 00:11:36,481
So you rape people?
183
00:11:36,656 --> 00:11:39,692
Well, now that's something
I'm not real proud of.
184
00:11:39,868 --> 00:11:43,699
I don't condone the practise,
to be honest. But I do it some.
185
00:11:43,872 --> 00:11:47,122
Just to keep up with the Joneses.
You know what I mean.
186
00:11:47,292 --> 00:11:51,124
Little dude like you,
be an easy mark.
187
00:11:51,296 --> 00:11:55,459
Oh, Jesus!
Isn't there anything I could do?
188
00:11:55,633 --> 00:11:57,543
You could join a gang.
189
00:11:57,719 --> 00:12:00,257
- Are you a racist?
- Not really.
190
00:12:00,430 --> 00:12:02,672
That leaves out the Nazis.
191
00:12:02,849 --> 00:12:05,518
- Got any Mob connections?
- No.
192
00:12:05,685 --> 00:12:08,223
- Wouldn't happen to be Latino?
- Uh-uh.
193
00:12:08,396 --> 00:12:11,065
Looks like everybody's gonna rape you.
194
00:12:12,358 --> 00:12:16,273
OK. OK, I... I bet I can be a racist
for three to five years.
195
00:12:16,446 --> 00:12:19,233
- A real racist. Hardcore.
- Well, good.
196
00:12:19,407 --> 00:12:21,732
- Then you can join the Nazis.
- Excellent.
197
00:12:21,910 --> 00:12:23,867
You'll only be raped by other Nazis.
198
00:12:24,037 --> 00:12:27,702
Raped by Nazis? No way!
199
00:12:27,874 --> 00:12:29,119
Anything else I can do?
200
00:12:29,292 --> 00:12:32,293
Isn't there some way I can
cultivate some outlaw image?
201
00:12:32,462 --> 00:12:35,831
- You have to kill a dude.
- Without killing a dude?
202
00:12:36,007 --> 00:12:39,341
In your case,
it'd be a real long shot, Stan.
203
00:12:39,511 --> 00:12:42,547
- Wouldn't happen to have any tats?
- Tats?
204
00:12:42,722 --> 00:12:44,430
Ink.
205
00:12:44,599 --> 00:12:48,597
Yes. Yeah. Yeah.
I didn't grow up with my mom. So I...
206
00:12:48,770 --> 00:12:51,687
When I was 18, I got a tattoo.
207
00:12:55,109 --> 00:12:56,354
"Mommy".
208
00:12:56,528 --> 00:13:00,062
You might as well buy a welcome mat,
strap it to your asshole.
209
00:13:00,240 --> 00:13:02,031
Say, "I'm open for business. "
210
00:13:10,458 --> 00:13:13,032
Whoo!
211
00:13:15,547 --> 00:13:18,631
- Stan?
- I'm gonna get raped!
212
00:13:20,301 --> 00:13:22,424
Stanny!
213
00:13:22,595 --> 00:13:26,260
Stan, honey.
You wanna wake up?
214
00:13:26,432 --> 00:13:29,433
It's 2.00.
215
00:13:30,854 --> 00:13:33,391
- Good morning, dear.
- Good afternoon, Stan.
216
00:13:33,565 --> 00:13:36,482
I got you some orange juice.
217
00:13:40,321 --> 00:13:42,777
It was all a bad dream.
218
00:13:42,949 --> 00:13:46,199
- Just a horrible dream.
- What was your dream, baby?
219
00:13:46,369 --> 00:13:47,863
It was awful!
220
00:13:48,037 --> 00:13:52,580
I was gonna go to prison
and big men were gonna rape me.
221
00:13:53,793 --> 00:13:57,292
But here I am, safe in my bed.
222
00:13:57,463 --> 00:13:59,123
It was all a bad dream.
223
00:13:59,299 --> 00:14:01,837
But you are gonna be going
to prison, right?
224
00:14:02,010 --> 00:14:05,343
- Huh?
- You're going to prison in six months.
225
00:14:06,973 --> 00:14:09,429
No!
226
00:14:11,769 --> 00:14:13,892
Oh! Oh!
227
00:14:14,063 --> 00:14:17,515
Honey, it's OK.
A lot can happen in six months.
228
00:14:17,692 --> 00:14:21,904
What's gonna happen, Mindy?
Is my anus gonna grow teeth?
229
00:14:22,989 --> 00:14:27,698
No, silly! You'll find a way.
You always do.
230
00:14:27,869 --> 00:14:29,363
What'd you just say?
231
00:14:29,537 --> 00:14:32,028
You always find a way.
232
00:14:33,833 --> 00:14:36,371
That's right. I always do.
233
00:14:36,961 --> 00:14:39,037
My baby ready to eat breakfast?
234
00:14:40,965 --> 00:14:42,163
Mindy...
235
00:14:44,260 --> 00:14:47,012
...did I have a lot growing up?
236
00:14:47,180 --> 00:14:51,260
No, I did not.
I had nothing growing up.
237
00:14:51,434 --> 00:14:55,017
I had a drunk father
who was emotionally unavailable to me.
238
00:14:55,188 --> 00:14:57,513
I had a summer job at Dairy Queen.
239
00:14:57,690 --> 00:15:00,228
I had tomato soup for dinner.
240
00:15:00,401 --> 00:15:02,394
Nobody ever gave me anything.
241
00:15:02,570 --> 00:15:06,734
Truly, mine was
a hardscrabble existence.
242
00:15:06,908 --> 00:15:08,735
Yet look at me today.
243
00:15:08,910 --> 00:15:10,949
I own a palatial estate,
244
00:15:11,120 --> 00:15:12,828
I drive a Lamborghini,
245
00:15:12,997 --> 00:15:14,824
I have a summer house on the lake,
246
00:15:14,999 --> 00:15:18,249
a complete Bang & Olufsen
home theatre system,
247
00:15:18,419 --> 00:15:21,089
a beautiful wife.
248
00:15:21,256 --> 00:15:24,790
And whom do I have to thank
for all this stuff?
249
00:15:24,968 --> 00:15:27,803
Me. Nobody else.
250
00:15:27,971 --> 00:15:31,422
Me. I am a winner.
251
00:15:31,599 --> 00:15:35,514
I set my mind to do something,
and I do it.
252
00:15:37,355 --> 00:15:42,350
And so when I say to you
that I will make myself un-rapeable,
253
00:15:42,527 --> 00:15:46,062
I will be un-rapeable!
254
00:15:46,823 --> 00:15:48,234
Yay!
255
00:15:50,243 --> 00:15:53,279
# You're the best around
Nothing's gonna ever keep you down
256
00:15:53,454 --> 00:15:58,413
# You're the best around
Nothing's gonna ever keep you down
257
00:15:58,585 --> 00:16:00,494
- # You're the best around
- Ow!
258
00:16:01,504 --> 00:16:05,668
# Nothing's gonna ever keep you down
259
00:16:13,600 --> 00:16:17,467
I got a couple of things in mind. But
first I got kind of a weird question.
260
00:16:17,645 --> 00:16:20,682
Do you have anything you could tattoo
around my sphincter
261
00:16:20,857 --> 00:16:22,351
to make it less attractive?
262
00:16:24,527 --> 00:16:26,983
Fourteen, 15...
263
00:16:27,155 --> 00:16:31,235
- Stanny, come to bed.
- Not... Not now, Mindy.
264
00:16:31,409 --> 00:16:33,318
Nineteen, 25.
265
00:16:33,494 --> 00:16:36,910
There.
You see new definition?
266
00:16:37,081 --> 00:16:39,240
My forearm. I think I see a new vein.
267
00:16:39,417 --> 00:16:41,125
I see a very sexy man.
268
00:16:42,545 --> 00:16:44,087
You do?
269
00:16:44,255 --> 00:16:46,544
Well, I wonder what he's gonna do next.
270
00:16:52,972 --> 00:16:55,179
Take me, darling.
271
00:16:55,975 --> 00:16:59,676
Mindy, I'm gonna go
to prison in a few months.
272
00:16:59,854 --> 00:17:01,348
Not now, honey.
273
00:17:04,025 --> 00:17:07,109
And while I'm there, men are gonna try
to take advantage of me.
274
00:17:07,278 --> 00:17:10,065
- I don't wanna hear about this.
- This is important.
275
00:17:10,240 --> 00:17:12,279
I'm doing everything I can
276
00:17:12,450 --> 00:17:14,609
to make sure that doesn't happen.
277
00:17:14,786 --> 00:17:17,491
But if it does happen,
and I do get violated...
278
00:17:17,664 --> 00:17:18,826
Stan!
279
00:17:20,416 --> 00:17:23,038
...I want the first time...
280
00:17:23,211 --> 00:17:24,753
...to be by someone I love.
281
00:17:31,427 --> 00:17:32,970
Oh!
282
00:17:34,764 --> 00:17:35,843
Oh.
283
00:17:37,559 --> 00:17:40,844
Stan, I couldn't.
284
00:17:41,020 --> 00:17:44,187
Please, Min, for me.
285
00:17:47,485 --> 00:17:51,068
Well... OK.
286
00:17:53,658 --> 00:17:55,117
Great.
287
00:18:08,173 --> 00:18:11,292
Oh, the horror!
288
00:18:11,551 --> 00:18:13,508
Two!
289
00:18:13,678 --> 00:18:15,671
Three! Four!
290
00:18:15,847 --> 00:18:18,420
Five! Six!
291
00:18:18,600 --> 00:18:21,684
Seven! Eight!
292
00:18:21,853 --> 00:18:24,558
You must concentrate, Stanley.
Concentrate!
293
00:18:24,731 --> 00:18:28,100
- How can I concentrate when I'm bored?
- If you're bored, leave.
294
00:18:28,276 --> 00:18:29,687
Oh, come on, Cho.
295
00:18:30,820 --> 00:18:33,940
- Master Cho!
- Master Cho.
296
00:18:34,115 --> 00:18:37,282
I've been coming here for a week
and I'm still doing baby stuff.
297
00:18:37,452 --> 00:18:39,528
When am I gonna learn to kick some ass?
298
00:18:39,704 --> 00:18:43,203
I'm a yellow belt.
Nobody's afraid of a yellow belt.
299
00:18:43,374 --> 00:18:45,581
You think you're ready
to move up in rank?
300
00:18:46,586 --> 00:18:47,617
Yeah, that's right.
301
00:18:47,795 --> 00:18:50,333
Fine. You'll have your chance.
302
00:18:50,507 --> 00:18:54,290
- Hey, Seymour! Come on.
- All right.
303
00:18:54,469 --> 00:18:57,304
Seymour.
304
00:18:57,472 --> 00:19:00,093
You'll fight Seymour
for honour of green belt.
305
00:19:02,936 --> 00:19:06,139
Want me to fight this little guy?
306
00:19:06,314 --> 00:19:08,770
- All right.
- Fighting stance!
307
00:19:08,942 --> 00:19:11,267
All right, Seymour.
See what you got.
308
00:19:13,655 --> 00:19:15,030
Ah! Ah!
309
00:19:15,198 --> 00:19:16,692
Oof!
310
00:19:23,915 --> 00:19:26,785
- How do you like that, huh, Seymour?
- Stanley!
311
00:19:35,260 --> 00:19:37,798
- Uh!
- You can forget about your refund!
312
00:19:42,559 --> 00:19:43,969
Is that all you got?
313
00:19:46,646 --> 00:19:48,140
Ah!
314
00:19:54,571 --> 00:19:56,148
Pussy.
315
00:20:17,468 --> 00:20:19,794
That's some technique you got.
316
00:20:29,898 --> 00:20:35,105
You couldn't knock a shit
out of a paper bag full of shit.
317
00:20:36,446 --> 00:20:38,937
Oh, and you could do better?
318
00:20:54,339 --> 00:20:56,212
Any questions?
319
00:21:00,678 --> 00:21:02,801
- Mindy!
- Dinner's almost ready!
320
00:21:02,972 --> 00:21:05,048
- I got great news!
- What happened to you?
321
00:21:05,225 --> 00:21:07,846
Never mind that.
I just met the best guy. Guess what?
322
00:21:08,019 --> 00:21:11,305
- He's agreed to be my trainer.
- Really? What's his name?
323
00:21:12,357 --> 00:21:13,471
The Master.
324
00:21:16,736 --> 00:21:19,690
- How do you do...
- The Master.
325
00:21:20,615 --> 00:21:22,406
He's gonna live with us and train me.
326
00:21:22,575 --> 00:21:25,031
I have to pay him
when my accounts get unfrozen.
327
00:21:25,203 --> 00:21:26,863
- Oh.
- Ahem.
328
00:21:27,038 --> 00:21:28,698
And the contract.
329
00:21:28,873 --> 00:21:31,198
Yeah, I'll write it up right now.
330
00:21:36,714 --> 00:21:41,092
I'm so sorry, The Master,
but there's no smoking in the house.
331
00:21:44,180 --> 00:21:45,722
Yes, there is.
332
00:21:49,143 --> 00:21:51,717
I better heat up another Lean Cuisine.
333
00:21:51,896 --> 00:21:55,764
Honey, you've done it again.
You heated it just perfect.
334
00:21:56,818 --> 00:21:58,941
So...
335
00:21:59,112 --> 00:22:02,196
...T he Master, where are you from?
336
00:22:02,365 --> 00:22:04,192
Hell.
337
00:22:05,660 --> 00:22:10,073
Oh! What brought you to LA? A job?
338
00:22:11,124 --> 00:22:15,453
I travel where the wind takes me.
339
00:22:16,880 --> 00:22:19,750
Isn't he great?
340
00:22:19,924 --> 00:22:23,091
Well, how long have you been
teaching the art of self-defence?
341
00:22:25,805 --> 00:22:29,803
Young lady,
what I teach is not art.
342
00:22:29,976 --> 00:22:31,933
It is science.
343
00:22:32,103 --> 00:22:37,145
A careful amalgam of the most
deadly parts of karate, kung fu,
344
00:22:37,317 --> 00:22:41,813
Wing Chun, Krav Maga, Muay Thai,
345
00:22:41,988 --> 00:22:45,938
savate and Filipino Kali.
346
00:22:46,117 --> 00:22:47,362
My favourite.
347
00:22:47,535 --> 00:22:50,109
Ooh! Wow!
348
00:22:50,872 --> 00:22:53,624
I find weakness
349
00:22:53,791 --> 00:22:56,461
and turn it into strength.
350
00:22:56,628 --> 00:22:59,629
I find fat and turn it into muscle.
351
00:22:59,797 --> 00:23:04,506
I find blisters
and turn them into canker sores.
352
00:23:04,677 --> 00:23:09,256
I find doubt
and I turn it into will.
353
00:23:09,432 --> 00:23:11,674
You can stop doing that now.
354
00:23:11,851 --> 00:23:14,223
- Doing what?
- Your hand.
355
00:23:16,064 --> 00:23:19,729
Oh. I forgot it was there.
356
00:23:23,321 --> 00:23:25,230
I'm gonna take a shit.
357
00:23:28,034 --> 00:23:30,607
- Enjoy yourself.
- Mm.
358
00:23:32,205 --> 00:23:36,203
Stan, honey,
does he really have to live here?
359
00:23:36,376 --> 00:23:38,664
- The Master?
- He scares me.
360
00:23:38,837 --> 00:23:42,704
I know. He scares me too. That's exactly
why he's the perfect guy to teach me.
361
00:23:42,882 --> 00:23:45,587
- But, Stan...
- Look, want me to survive in prison?
362
00:23:45,760 --> 00:23:48,927
- Of course I do.
- Then don't argue with me about this.
363
00:23:49,097 --> 00:23:50,639
You'll see, he'll grow on you.
364
00:24:01,442 --> 00:24:03,850
Wake up, weakling.
365
00:24:04,028 --> 00:24:07,362
What the hell you doing in here?
366
00:24:07,532 --> 00:24:10,865
It's time to begin your training.
367
00:24:11,035 --> 00:24:13,324
But it's five in the morning.
368
00:24:13,496 --> 00:24:16,414
- Is that liver?
- It's your breakfast.
369
00:24:16,583 --> 00:24:21,825
And every moment you delay,
I squeeze out more of its vital juices.
370
00:24:22,005 --> 00:24:24,330
Trust me, you'll need them later.
371
00:24:24,507 --> 00:24:27,876
- OK, I'm up.
- But are you ready?
372
00:24:28,052 --> 00:24:30,722
Look what I found beside your bed.
373
00:24:30,889 --> 00:24:34,139
This is weakness.
374
00:24:34,309 --> 00:24:37,678
This is defeatism.
375
00:24:37,854 --> 00:24:40,475
Actually, we were kind of enjoying that.
376
00:24:40,648 --> 00:24:42,641
Eat this.
377
00:24:43,776 --> 00:24:45,935
And follow me.
378
00:24:52,452 --> 00:24:53,792
Punch!
All right, now kick.
379
00:24:53,828 --> 00:24:56,070
Punch!
All right, now kick.
380
00:24:56,247 --> 00:24:58,536
Kick!
381
00:24:59,584 --> 00:25:00,959
Kick like you mean it!
382
00:25:03,254 --> 00:25:06,789
- Oh!
- I blended that gross stuff you wanted.
383
00:25:06,966 --> 00:25:10,631
I got it all in Koreatown. I didn't
even know there was a Koreatown.
384
00:25:14,307 --> 00:25:16,264
Too many eggs.
385
00:25:16,434 --> 00:25:19,885
The fish oil is nice.
Ox pancreas is good.
386
00:25:21,272 --> 00:25:24,107
- Next time, use more tongue.
- That's what she said.
387
00:25:24,275 --> 00:25:26,019
- Ooh!
- Oh, Stan!
388
00:25:26,194 --> 00:25:28,068
- I'm all right.
- Get away from him!
389
00:25:28,238 --> 00:25:32,615
- I'm OK.
- Rise and drink your lunch.
390
00:25:41,125 --> 00:25:43,414
Don't I get to eat anything
that tastes good?
391
00:25:46,714 --> 00:25:50,664
- You like hot dogs?
- Yeah, sure.
392
00:25:50,844 --> 00:25:53,169
If you don't drink that,
393
00:25:53,346 --> 00:25:55,718
the boys in prison will feed you...
394
00:25:57,058 --> 00:25:59,347
...many hot dogs.
395
00:26:08,820 --> 00:26:11,987
I can kick your ass so fast
you wouldn't even feel it.
396
00:26:12,156 --> 00:26:15,656
I'd like to see that.
397
00:26:15,827 --> 00:26:19,030
You didn't kick me in the ass.
I didn't feel anything.
398
00:26:27,589 --> 00:26:29,712
Ow! Ow!
399
00:26:29,883 --> 00:26:32,338
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
400
00:26:32,510 --> 00:26:34,384
Ow! Ow! Ow!
401
00:26:34,554 --> 00:26:36,013
Oh! Ow! Ooh!
402
00:26:36,181 --> 00:26:38,672
- Pain is interpretation.
- OK.
403
00:26:38,850 --> 00:26:43,428
I'm gonna call a time-out here. You're
beating my husband with a flaming stick.
404
00:26:43,605 --> 00:26:46,689
Isn't there some kind
of role-playing exercise you can do?
405
00:26:46,858 --> 00:26:49,349
Run along, honey.
This is man stuff here.
406
00:26:49,527 --> 00:26:51,271
Go ahead, Master.
407
00:26:51,446 --> 00:26:53,688
Ow! Ow! Ow!
408
00:26:53,865 --> 00:26:57,400
Ow! Ah! Oh!
409
00:26:57,577 --> 00:26:59,700
Ow! Ah!
410
00:27:04,667 --> 00:27:08,499
No disrespect, I realise this
is strengthening my nipples.
411
00:27:08,671 --> 00:27:11,506
And believe me, I can feel the burn.
412
00:27:11,674 --> 00:27:15,719
I was wondering,
just how important are strong nipples?
413
00:27:15,887 --> 00:27:18,508
- Someday these nipples...
- Ah!
414
00:27:18,681 --> 00:27:21,552
...may save your life.
- Ah!
415
00:27:22,894 --> 00:27:26,393
You are what you eat.
416
00:27:26,564 --> 00:27:29,850
Um, are you sure
that's Eastern mysticism?
417
00:27:30,026 --> 00:27:33,027
Because I learned that
in health class in third grade.
418
00:27:33,196 --> 00:27:34,820
Silence, woman.
419
00:27:34,989 --> 00:27:38,939
I mean, all that stuff about pain
and illusion sounds totally mystical.
420
00:27:39,118 --> 00:27:42,404
But "you are what you eat"?
Even I know that. And I am from Omaha.
421
00:27:45,208 --> 00:27:47,450
What part of Omaha?
422
00:27:47,627 --> 00:27:50,248
- Oh!
- Dundee.
423
00:27:51,339 --> 00:27:52,917
Happy Hollow.
424
00:27:54,008 --> 00:27:55,419
You're Oscar?
425
00:27:55,593 --> 00:27:58,167
I should have known.
426
00:27:58,346 --> 00:28:02,178
Those womanly, childbearing hips
427
00:28:02,350 --> 00:28:07,392
could not be a product
of this perfidious coast.
428
00:28:07,564 --> 00:28:10,849
Uh, do you mind?
I'm trying to eat scorpion here.
429
00:28:11,025 --> 00:28:13,148
Insolent fool!
430
00:28:13,653 --> 00:28:16,524
You have lost the right
431
00:28:16,698 --> 00:28:19,236
to eat scorpion.
432
00:28:22,537 --> 00:28:26,321
Great. There goes my lunch.
433
00:28:26,499 --> 00:28:28,124
- Thanks.
- This is not working.
434
00:28:28,293 --> 00:28:30,036
- Master says...
- Master's a jerk.
435
00:28:30,211 --> 00:28:31,705
- Shh!
- He is!
436
00:28:31,880 --> 00:28:36,458
And he is a creep. The house smells.
Does he have to smoke in every room?
437
00:28:36,634 --> 00:28:40,466
The only time I see you alone is in bed
and you're too tired to...
438
00:28:40,638 --> 00:28:44,007
Hey! I got five months, and then
it's prison. I gotta stay focused.
439
00:28:44,184 --> 00:28:48,644
I gotta think, eat, breathe prison.
I don't have time for anything else.
440
00:28:48,813 --> 00:28:51,814
Not even time for me?
441
00:28:54,360 --> 00:28:55,689
Tell you what.
442
00:28:55,862 --> 00:28:59,231
After I'm done working out
with The Master, I'll rent some movies,
443
00:28:59,407 --> 00:29:02,776
and we'll cuddle around the TV
like old times, OK?
444
00:29:02,952 --> 00:29:04,744
Really?
445
00:29:12,962 --> 00:29:14,077
Mindy!
446
00:29:14,255 --> 00:29:17,090
Some men broke into the house!
They wanna rape you!
447
00:29:17,258 --> 00:29:19,465
- What?
- Big men!
448
00:29:19,636 --> 00:29:22,755
- They wanna rape you! Repeatedly!
- What about The Master?
449
00:29:22,931 --> 00:29:26,430
They have guns! They killed him!
There's nothing we can do!
450
00:29:26,601 --> 00:29:29,518
- You're gonna get raped! Raped!
- Oh, my God!
451
00:29:29,687 --> 00:29:32,357
Raped!
452
00:29:32,524 --> 00:29:34,481
Rape!
453
00:29:36,694 --> 00:29:38,153
There.
454
00:29:40,657 --> 00:29:43,776
- Now you know how I feel.
- What?
455
00:29:43,952 --> 00:29:47,534
Fear of rape. That's what I'm gonna
have to live with for three years.
456
00:29:47,705 --> 00:29:51,288
Nobody broke
into the house?
457
00:29:51,459 --> 00:29:52,657
That's right.
458
00:29:52,836 --> 00:29:55,872
Now maybe you'll be supportive
of what I'm going through.
459
00:29:56,047 --> 00:29:59,665
You son of a bitch!
460
00:30:01,261 --> 00:30:03,549
- OK, you're upset.
- You son of a bitch!
461
00:30:03,721 --> 00:30:06,509
- You don't have to call names. Mindy!
- Son of a bitch!
462
00:30:06,683 --> 00:30:11,261
- Bitch, bitch, bitch! You bastard!
- Mindy. Mindy!
463
00:30:11,437 --> 00:30:14,723
Oh! Mindy.
464
00:30:14,899 --> 00:30:17,569
- What are you doing?
- What's it look like? Leaving.
465
00:30:17,735 --> 00:30:20,986
Why? Because I pull one little prank,
which when you calm down...
466
00:30:21,155 --> 00:30:23,907
It's not just one prank!
You only think about yourself!
467
00:30:24,075 --> 00:30:26,993
You're the most selfish man
who ever lived, ever! Ever!
468
00:30:27,161 --> 00:30:30,577
Whoa! Excuse me? Selfish?
I find that funny! I really do!
469
00:30:30,748 --> 00:30:33,121
I've given you everything
you've ever wanted!
470
00:30:33,293 --> 00:30:34,870
- You're crazy!
- This house!
471
00:30:35,044 --> 00:30:37,002
- It's in your name.
- Those boobs!
472
00:30:37,172 --> 00:30:40,256
- You wanted these.
- You said the Lamborghini's too small,
473
00:30:40,425 --> 00:30:44,339
- I got a second car.
- A 1955 Porsche Speedster!
474
00:30:44,512 --> 00:30:47,513
- It has a back seat!
- Oh!
475
00:30:48,516 --> 00:30:52,561
- What do you want? I'll do anything.
- I want a baby, you asshole!
476
00:30:52,729 --> 00:30:55,646
That again? Fine. OK. You win.
477
00:30:55,815 --> 00:30:58,306
- We'll have a baby.
- Really?
478
00:30:58,484 --> 00:31:01,320
No, not really,
but we can visit people who have kids.
479
00:31:04,449 --> 00:31:06,276
Goodbye!
480
00:31:07,994 --> 00:31:10,485
Good, leave! I don't need you!
481
00:31:10,663 --> 00:31:12,455
I don't need anybody!
482
00:31:12,624 --> 00:31:15,162
God!
483
00:31:15,335 --> 00:31:19,415
Uh, one moment. I'm... meditating.
484
00:31:23,968 --> 00:31:26,340
It's so big! Oh, God!
485
00:31:26,513 --> 00:31:28,137
Mindy left.
486
00:31:28,556 --> 00:31:30,928
- Yes, yes, yes!
- Good.
487
00:31:31,100 --> 00:31:34,101
Oh, God!
488
00:31:34,270 --> 00:31:37,888
Now, the real training can begin.
489
00:31:40,318 --> 00:31:44,363
We do not have time
to teach you the five fingers of death.
490
00:31:44,531 --> 00:31:47,650
We have only time for one finger.
491
00:31:48,201 --> 00:31:49,695
Pick one.
492
00:31:50,703 --> 00:31:53,740
All right. Wait. This one.
493
00:31:57,836 --> 00:31:59,294
Hold this.
494
00:32:08,930 --> 00:32:10,128
Your turn.
495
00:32:24,070 --> 00:32:27,688
Ah! Ow!
496
00:32:27,866 --> 00:32:31,697
Ah! Ah!
497
00:32:47,385 --> 00:32:49,212
Ah!
498
00:32:59,981 --> 00:33:03,765
# You don't know what to do, you're
sitting there and you're all alone
499
00:33:03,943 --> 00:33:06,351
Don't look at what you're doing.
500
00:33:06,529 --> 00:33:09,566
Just feel. Feel.
501
00:33:09,741 --> 00:33:13,276
# You've got no place to call your home
502
00:33:13,453 --> 00:33:16,786
I felt. It felt bad.
503
00:33:19,125 --> 00:33:20,750
Oh!
504
00:33:23,046 --> 00:33:27,708
You must learn to feel your opponent.
Know his intentions.
505
00:33:30,345 --> 00:33:34,757
If he is good at a distance,
then you must be close.
506
00:33:38,603 --> 00:33:44,107
If he is good close,
then you must fight him at a distance.
507
00:33:50,281 --> 00:33:54,279
What if your opponent is good close
and from a distance?
508
00:33:54,452 --> 00:33:56,492
Then you are up
to your eyeballs in shit.
509
00:33:56,663 --> 00:33:59,201
Watch your mouth.
You are nobody.
510
00:34:01,668 --> 00:34:02,699
Ow!
511
00:34:04,003 --> 00:34:06,673
- Hey, what are those?
- A little something I picked up
512
00:34:06,840 --> 00:34:09,794
- at the Shaolin temple.
- What do you use them for?
513
00:34:09,968 --> 00:34:11,378
Oh!
514
00:34:12,136 --> 00:34:13,595
Oh! Ow!
515
00:34:13,763 --> 00:34:15,554
Oh! Ah!
516
00:34:16,349 --> 00:34:18,306
Your lunch.
517
00:35:11,070 --> 00:35:13,561
Yeah.
518
00:35:18,036 --> 00:35:20,324
- Whoo-hoo!
- All right, that's close enough.
519
00:35:24,125 --> 00:35:25,156
Whoo-hoo!
520
00:35:26,377 --> 00:35:28,370
Hoo-hoo!
521
00:35:30,048 --> 00:35:32,669
Ah!
522
00:35:34,886 --> 00:35:37,092
Never celebrate too early.
523
00:35:37,263 --> 00:35:38,841
I'll remember that.
524
00:35:47,190 --> 00:35:48,388
Yes.
525
00:35:52,070 --> 00:35:54,477
Mississippi five, Mississippi six,
526
00:35:54,656 --> 00:35:56,981
Mississippi seven, Mississippi eight,
527
00:35:57,158 --> 00:36:00,242
Mississippi nine...
528
00:36:00,411 --> 00:36:02,653
My God! That is amazing!
529
00:36:02,830 --> 00:36:04,823
Oh, that's nothing.
You should see him.
530
00:36:04,999 --> 00:36:09,412
It's easy for me. Cigarettes have
ruined my circulation so much
531
00:36:09,587 --> 00:36:12,257
I can't even feel my hands anymore.
532
00:36:12,423 --> 00:36:14,333
So that's your trick.
533
00:36:14,509 --> 00:36:16,051
Mm-hm.
534
00:36:16,636 --> 00:36:21,262
Here's to Stan Minton,
my second finest student.
535
00:36:21,432 --> 00:36:23,758
Second finest?
536
00:36:23,935 --> 00:36:25,643
Who's number one?
537
00:36:25,812 --> 00:36:28,813
I hope you never have to find that out.
538
00:36:28,982 --> 00:36:32,600
He used what I taught him,
not for his own protection,
539
00:36:32,777 --> 00:36:35,019
but for evil.
540
00:36:39,868 --> 00:36:43,735
Well, fuck that guy.
Here's to number two.
541
00:36:43,913 --> 00:36:49,287
Now, drink up.
Stan has one final test.
542
00:36:50,628 --> 00:36:52,004
Tonight.
543
00:36:54,883 --> 00:36:57,883
I do? OK.
544
00:36:58,052 --> 00:36:59,677
Let's go for it.
545
00:37:17,030 --> 00:37:18,738
Hello, Cho.
546
00:37:18,907 --> 00:37:21,658
It's Master Cho to you.
547
00:37:21,826 --> 00:37:26,038
Master Cho? Or Masturbator Cho?
548
00:37:26,206 --> 00:37:30,334
- Excuse me?
- You heard me... punk.
549
00:37:34,547 --> 00:37:37,382
Looking for a beat-down, mister?
550
00:37:37,550 --> 00:37:40,919
What are you looking for?
To beat off?
551
00:37:41,095 --> 00:37:42,839
That's it.
552
00:37:54,901 --> 00:37:55,980
Ooh!
553
00:38:16,631 --> 00:38:18,374
Very good, Stan.
554
00:38:18,550 --> 00:38:20,673
You mind walking me to my car?
555
00:38:20,844 --> 00:38:23,335
All right.
556
00:38:23,513 --> 00:38:27,926
I don't feel too comfortable here.
I don't think the Asian people like me.
557
00:38:41,447 --> 00:38:46,275
All right, you just go up those steps,
turn yourself in for processing.
558
00:38:46,452 --> 00:38:48,825
By the way, slight change of plans.
559
00:38:48,997 --> 00:38:51,867
The Bureau of Prisons
called me yesterday.
560
00:38:52,041 --> 00:38:55,126
They're sending you to Oaksburg,
not Verlaine.
561
00:38:55,295 --> 00:38:59,162
- Why?
- Who knows? Bureaucracy.
562
00:38:59,340 --> 00:39:02,460
It makes no difference.
563
00:39:04,012 --> 00:39:06,799
Go on. You'll do great.
564
00:39:06,973 --> 00:39:09,844
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
565
00:39:13,438 --> 00:39:16,854
Uh, did Mindy or her lawyer call
about the divorce?
566
00:39:19,611 --> 00:39:22,896
It's not like I care anyway.
All right.
567
00:39:23,072 --> 00:39:24,982
See you guys in three years.
568
00:39:30,705 --> 00:39:35,082
- What do you think?
- I think you should walk away quickly.
569
00:39:43,593 --> 00:39:46,594
- Ah! Filthy pig!
- I need a beer.
570
00:39:46,763 --> 00:39:48,091
Oh!
571
00:39:48,264 --> 00:39:50,969
Don't get in the car!
572
00:40:12,163 --> 00:40:14,156
This your first time?
573
00:40:16,584 --> 00:40:20,000
Hey, sweetie,
ain't you got a name?
574
00:40:20,171 --> 00:40:22,294
Ah!
575
00:40:22,465 --> 00:40:25,799
Talk to me again,
I'll twist your whole damn titty off.
576
00:40:25,969 --> 00:40:29,219
- Ooh, my mama, ooh, my mama.
- Hey, man, I'm scared too.
577
00:40:29,389 --> 00:40:31,880
But it can't be as bad
as they say it is.
578
00:40:32,058 --> 00:40:36,222
It's just as bad as they say.
The sooner you realise that, the better.
579
00:40:36,396 --> 00:40:40,725
- Tell 'em.
- You'll find out, soon enough.
580
00:40:42,569 --> 00:40:44,941
What'd I say about talking to me?
581
00:40:46,406 --> 00:40:47,734
Damn, man!
582
00:41:10,763 --> 00:41:13,468
Welcome to Oaksburg Penitentiary.
583
00:41:13,641 --> 00:41:16,726
For reasons beyond
what I care to imagine,
584
00:41:16,895 --> 00:41:20,643
you gentlemen have found yourselves
under my stewardship.
585
00:41:20,815 --> 00:41:25,027
My name is Warden Francis Gasque.
586
00:41:25,195 --> 00:41:27,602
But you can just call me Boss.
587
00:41:27,780 --> 00:41:31,529
We only got one rule here at Oaksburg:
588
00:41:31,701 --> 00:41:37,288
Don't fuck with the Boss. That means
you leave me and my men alone.
589
00:41:37,457 --> 00:41:42,166
What you animals do to each other,
that's your business.
590
00:41:42,337 --> 00:41:46,085
And right behind you
is the warden's garden.
591
00:41:46,257 --> 00:41:51,418
Anybody caught pissing on that
will have his penis removed.
592
00:41:53,056 --> 00:41:56,756
Sergeant Bullard will lead you
to the medical office where you'll strip
593
00:41:56,935 --> 00:42:01,015
and have your cavities searched.
You're gonna enjoy that.
594
00:42:01,189 --> 00:42:05,483
Now, gentlemen! Single file.
Come on! Get up there.
595
00:42:05,652 --> 00:42:06,683
Pecker to butt hole.
596
00:42:11,199 --> 00:42:14,484
All right, assume the position.
597
00:42:20,208 --> 00:42:23,956
Why you screaming like a little girl?!
598
00:42:24,128 --> 00:42:27,165
Sarge, look.
599
00:42:27,340 --> 00:42:29,131
Sweet Jesus!
600
00:42:31,719 --> 00:42:36,097
It's like an alien
staring into my soul.
601
00:42:38,184 --> 00:42:42,597
Welcome home. New luxury condos,
compliments of the state.
602
00:42:42,772 --> 00:42:44,480
Step it up, boys.
603
00:42:50,488 --> 00:42:53,489
Come on, sweet meat!
604
00:43:01,749 --> 00:43:06,376
Hello there, young fella.
I guess we're cellmates.
605
00:43:07,839 --> 00:43:11,884
My name's Larry.
But you can call me Shorts.
606
00:43:12,051 --> 00:43:14,589
Shorts, you're in my bunk.
607
00:43:14,762 --> 00:43:18,677
- What?
- That's my bunk. Get out.
608
00:43:18,850 --> 00:43:22,183
You hold on there
just a second.
609
00:43:22,353 --> 00:43:25,722
This is my bunk.
What gives you the right to...
610
00:43:25,899 --> 00:43:27,476
Ow!
611
00:43:29,110 --> 00:43:34,449
- I said that's my bunk.
- Yeah, I guess it is.
612
00:43:34,616 --> 00:43:35,814
Whoo!
613
00:43:42,207 --> 00:43:45,576
Uh, you might wanna change the sheets.
614
00:43:47,504 --> 00:43:50,421
I'm kind of a compulsive masturbator.
615
00:43:55,386 --> 00:43:56,929
Shorts, that's your bunk.
616
00:43:57,096 --> 00:44:00,300
- Really?
- Absolutely.
617
00:44:00,475 --> 00:44:04,389
Thanks, buddy.
I think we're gonna get along just fine.
618
00:44:04,562 --> 00:44:05,843
Hey, put her here.
619
00:44:08,191 --> 00:44:11,774
- I don't shake hands.
- Well, whatever.
620
00:44:15,865 --> 00:44:18,273
Ah, good to be back.
621
00:44:20,411 --> 00:44:23,163
Tell me, Shorts,
who's the toughest guy here?
622
00:44:23,331 --> 00:44:25,573
Who's the biggest bad-ass
in the cell block?
623
00:44:25,750 --> 00:44:29,000
Biggest bad-ass...
There's a lot of contenders.
624
00:44:29,170 --> 00:44:33,120
There's Cleon. He's leader
of the Diamond Kings, the black gang.
625
00:44:33,299 --> 00:44:38,092
- I seen him kill a man with his fist.
- That's right! Yeah!
626
00:44:38,263 --> 00:44:42,640
Then there's Juanito.
He's head of the Mexican gang.
627
00:44:42,809 --> 00:44:44,801
Hey, get back. Hey!
628
00:44:44,978 --> 00:44:48,643
And whatever you do,
don't go near those guys.
629
00:44:48,815 --> 00:44:53,975
- The goal is to express ourselves...
- They're Scientologists.
630
00:44:54,153 --> 00:44:57,688
- They don't look so tough.
- Yeah. They'll talk your ear off
631
00:44:57,866 --> 00:45:00,357
- and then sue your ass.
... distinguish fear.
632
00:45:00,535 --> 00:45:04,485
Then there's the Nazis.
None of them are too tough.
633
00:45:04,664 --> 00:45:08,744
They don't fight fair and don't fight
alone. They always gang up on you.
634
00:45:08,918 --> 00:45:11,836
Their leader, Patterson,
he's a real bastard.
635
00:45:12,005 --> 00:45:15,456
His uncle's the head
of the Aryan Nation.
636
00:45:15,633 --> 00:45:17,460
Let me clarify my question, Shorts.
637
00:45:17,635 --> 00:45:20,305
Who's the most
dangerous sexual predator?
638
00:45:20,471 --> 00:45:22,429
Oh, that's easy.
639
00:45:22,599 --> 00:45:25,765
It's Big Raymond.
Absolutely insatiable.
640
00:45:25,935 --> 00:45:28,936
Crazy. The other black guys
don't go near him.
641
00:45:29,105 --> 00:45:32,770
But they'd back him up
if it came to a fight.
642
00:45:32,942 --> 00:45:35,184
Big Raymond it is.
643
00:45:35,361 --> 00:45:37,235
- Can I borrow that?
- Yeah.
644
00:45:37,405 --> 00:45:38,899
Thanks.
645
00:45:40,617 --> 00:45:43,321
Hey, Stan. Stan, where you going?
646
00:45:43,494 --> 00:45:46,365
You think that cigarette was free?
Is that what you think?
647
00:45:46,539 --> 00:45:49,209
I'll pay you back, man.
I don't have any money.
648
00:45:49,375 --> 00:45:51,831
You think I want money?
649
00:45:53,046 --> 00:45:54,208
Mmm...
650
00:45:54,380 --> 00:45:57,963
- Excuse me.
- Bug off, bitch!
651
00:45:58,134 --> 00:46:00,542
I'll get to you later.
652
00:46:00,720 --> 00:46:02,594
Did you just call me bitch?
653
00:46:04,057 --> 00:46:06,014
Yeah, I said it.
654
00:46:09,854 --> 00:46:11,977
Hey, everybody! Did you hear that?
655
00:46:12,148 --> 00:46:15,351
Big Raymond, for no reason,
just called me bitch!
656
00:46:15,527 --> 00:46:17,234
Now, was that nice?
657
00:46:17,403 --> 00:46:20,155
It's not like I called him fat.
658
00:46:21,449 --> 00:46:24,569
It's not like I said I seen pig shit
prettier than he is.
659
00:46:27,163 --> 00:46:30,864
It's not like I said his mother's pussy
smells like egg salad.
660
00:46:31,960 --> 00:46:33,584
Which it does.
661
00:46:42,011 --> 00:46:45,131
Oh, hell nah! Ohhh, hell nah!
662
00:46:45,306 --> 00:46:48,510
Hell nah! Oh, hell nah!
663
00:46:48,685 --> 00:46:50,558
Ho-ho! Yeah!
664
00:47:04,450 --> 00:47:07,866
Ah! Ah!
665
00:47:08,037 --> 00:47:10,659
Ahhh!
666
00:47:12,876 --> 00:47:14,500
Who's the bitch now, bitch?
667
00:47:16,379 --> 00:47:17,707
Ooh!
668
00:47:17,881 --> 00:47:20,798
I told you Raymond was gonna get
his ass beat. I told you!
669
00:47:24,387 --> 00:47:27,174
My cracker!
670
00:47:27,348 --> 00:47:29,804
Laying the boot to the big nigga.
Give it up!
671
00:47:29,976 --> 00:47:32,847
Don't use that word around me.
It's ugly and racist.
672
00:47:34,355 --> 00:47:38,104
Yeah, dawg!
673
00:47:39,527 --> 00:47:41,401
He's funny too, man.
674
00:47:41,571 --> 00:47:44,406
All right, listen here, player.
All right?
675
00:47:44,574 --> 00:47:48,192
We want you to join up with us,
nah mean? Them niggas is gonna tear...
676
00:47:48,369 --> 00:47:50,492
Ooh!
677
00:47:50,663 --> 00:47:52,537
I said don't talk that way around me.
678
00:47:52,707 --> 00:47:54,082
Let me get some of that!
679
00:47:54,250 --> 00:47:57,335
- Let's kill him.
- No, I got it, I got it. I got it!
680
00:47:58,171 --> 00:48:00,045
Handle your business, Cleon.
681
00:48:03,635 --> 00:48:07,335
Oh, come on. Don't tell me you're gonna
stick up for that fat son of a bitch.
682
00:48:07,514 --> 00:48:10,847
You happen to see the colour
of that fat son of a bitch's skin?
683
00:48:11,017 --> 00:48:13,223
Hey, aren't we over that?
684
00:48:13,394 --> 00:48:16,182
Didn't you see that Nova episode?
Huh, you guys?
685
00:48:16,356 --> 00:48:18,395
They did that DNA test.
686
00:48:18,566 --> 00:48:21,022
- We all come from Africa.
- Kick his ass.
687
00:48:21,194 --> 00:48:25,441
It's a proven fact. Under the skin,
I'm just as black as you are.
688
00:48:25,615 --> 00:48:27,074
- Fuck that.
- Get him!
689
00:48:27,242 --> 00:48:30,942
- Get him, man! Get him! Get him!
- Motherfucker!
690
00:48:37,377 --> 00:48:39,334
- Get him!
- Ah!
691
00:48:50,557 --> 00:48:52,265
Man, get that fool!
692
00:49:05,113 --> 00:49:06,358
Dumb bitch!
693
00:49:10,660 --> 00:49:12,451
Hold on. See what happens.
694
00:49:19,294 --> 00:49:21,417
- Oh!
- Ah!
695
00:49:38,521 --> 00:49:40,728
Oh!
696
00:49:47,405 --> 00:49:50,192
- Take the stick!
- No, don't take it!
697
00:49:56,998 --> 00:49:59,915
- Take the stick!
- No, don't take it!
698
00:50:01,669 --> 00:50:03,543
Oh, he did it again.
699
00:50:09,093 --> 00:50:11,300
- Take the stick! Take it!
- Mm-hm?
700
00:50:11,471 --> 00:50:14,140
No, no, don't take it!
701
00:50:18,770 --> 00:50:20,430
Whoo!
702
00:50:22,857 --> 00:50:25,146
I told him
not to take that stick.
703
00:50:33,117 --> 00:50:35,075
Even the Asian!
704
00:50:35,662 --> 00:50:37,654
Where the hell did that guy come from?
705
00:50:37,830 --> 00:50:39,704
- Whoo!
- Damn!
706
00:50:39,874 --> 00:50:42,081
- That guy's good.
- All right.
707
00:50:42,252 --> 00:50:44,125
Come on, Cleon.
708
00:50:44,295 --> 00:50:46,965
It's your time, baby.
Don't be scared.
709
00:50:47,131 --> 00:50:49,338
It's your time to shine, Cleon.
710
00:50:50,301 --> 00:50:51,582
Ooh!
711
00:50:54,556 --> 00:50:56,595
Cleon.
712
00:50:56,766 --> 00:51:00,894
If you wanna fight me,
you're gonna have to fight me.
713
00:51:01,062 --> 00:51:04,182
- I understand.
- Pick up your gold teeth.
714
00:51:04,357 --> 00:51:07,856
I'm gonna let you keep them this time.
715
00:51:08,027 --> 00:51:10,067
But if you come at me again...
716
00:51:10,697 --> 00:51:13,104
...I'm gonna hang onto them
like a Swiss banker.
717
00:51:28,548 --> 00:51:31,003
Ya'll ain't gonna help me?
718
00:51:31,176 --> 00:51:33,845
I'm missing a bicuspid.
719
00:51:35,305 --> 00:51:37,712
We should have killed him.
720
00:51:37,891 --> 00:51:41,840
Somebody,
call an orthodontist.
721
00:51:46,482 --> 00:51:50,017
Hm. I see Mr Minton
has acquainted himself
722
00:51:50,195 --> 00:51:52,401
with his new surroundings.
723
00:51:53,448 --> 00:51:56,402
I believe it's time I had
my little chat with him.
724
00:52:01,497 --> 00:52:02,956
Ow!
725
00:52:05,084 --> 00:52:08,703
Whoa, whoa, look out.
726
00:52:08,880 --> 00:52:10,919
Beat it. All of you.
727
00:52:21,226 --> 00:52:25,519
Oh, man, this stuff's good. I don't know
what everybody's complaining about.
728
00:52:25,688 --> 00:52:27,480
You're kidding me.
729
00:52:27,649 --> 00:52:30,733
Hey, man.
I just wanna say thanks.
730
00:52:32,028 --> 00:52:33,059
For what?
731
00:52:34,906 --> 00:52:37,741
You know, for helping me before.
732
00:52:37,909 --> 00:52:39,107
With Big Raymond.
733
00:52:39,285 --> 00:52:42,156
I wasn't helping you.
I was helping me.
734
00:52:43,039 --> 00:52:47,037
I had to beat up the biggest shithead.
He happened to be talking to you.
735
00:52:47,961 --> 00:52:49,503
OK.
736
00:52:50,630 --> 00:52:53,797
But, you know, I... I mean, I...
737
00:52:53,967 --> 00:52:55,959
I think that guy wanted to fuck me.
738
00:52:59,806 --> 00:53:03,804
Trust me, in your case,
I was just putting off the inevitable.
739
00:53:09,732 --> 00:53:13,018
Yeah.
740
00:53:13,194 --> 00:53:14,605
Well, thanks anyway.
741
00:53:16,447 --> 00:53:19,899
What's your name, girl?
Don't be shy, just say hi.
742
00:53:20,785 --> 00:53:23,193
Come here. Kick back, baby girl!
743
00:53:23,371 --> 00:53:26,372
Little hard on the kid, weren't you?
744
00:53:26,541 --> 00:53:29,826
That's got nothing to do with me.
And I'm gonna keep it that way.
745
00:53:30,003 --> 00:53:32,244
- You got that?
- Mm-hm.
746
00:53:48,271 --> 00:53:50,477
One-one-five!
747
00:53:53,318 --> 00:53:56,734
Minton, warden wants to see you.
Get up.
748
00:53:56,905 --> 00:53:59,277
- Me?
- Now! Walk!
749
00:54:00,491 --> 00:54:02,199
Put your hands behind your back.
750
00:54:05,705 --> 00:54:08,872
Come in.
751
00:54:13,421 --> 00:54:15,793
Minton, I'm glad you could make it.
752
00:54:15,965 --> 00:54:19,334
- You can take the cuffs off him.
- Sure you wanna do that, Boss?
753
00:54:19,511 --> 00:54:21,587
I said take 'em off.
754
00:54:21,763 --> 00:54:24,336
It's all right.
755
00:54:24,516 --> 00:54:25,796
I already got 'em.
756
00:54:27,852 --> 00:54:29,892
It's a matter of dislocating the wrists.
757
00:54:34,817 --> 00:54:38,685
Ew! Ew, that is creepy!
758
00:54:38,863 --> 00:54:42,113
You can wait outside.
759
00:54:43,159 --> 00:54:44,274
Have a seat.
760
00:54:50,083 --> 00:54:52,918
Warden, if this is about me
fighting in the yard, it...
761
00:54:53,086 --> 00:54:54,580
Cigar?
762
00:54:56,381 --> 00:54:57,839
Thank you.
763
00:55:01,594 --> 00:55:02,792
Brandy?
764
00:55:04,514 --> 00:55:06,720
Sure.
765
00:55:16,609 --> 00:55:18,649
You know, you wardens should complain.
766
00:55:18,820 --> 00:55:23,031
'Cause in the movies,
they always make you look like assholes.
767
00:55:23,199 --> 00:55:28,276
Well,
I don't plan on being a warden forever.
768
00:55:28,454 --> 00:55:31,076
- Is that right?
- Tell me, Minton.
769
00:55:31,249 --> 00:55:33,621
What do you think of this place?
770
00:55:35,086 --> 00:55:37,494
It's OK, for a prison.
771
00:55:37,672 --> 00:55:41,884
Not the prison. The land.
772
00:55:45,388 --> 00:55:50,264
It's a nice sized property. Great views
of the foothills and city. Level grade.
773
00:55:50,435 --> 00:55:53,768
I'm assuming there's
bedrock beneath us.
774
00:55:53,938 --> 00:55:58,684
Easy access to downtown.
I see some nice development potential.
775
00:55:58,860 --> 00:56:02,027
- Too bad you got a prison on it.
- Exactly.
776
00:56:02,197 --> 00:56:06,526
You know, it's no accident
you came to Oaksburg.
777
00:56:06,701 --> 00:56:09,572
I pulled a few strings
to get you here.
778
00:56:12,665 --> 00:56:14,325
What made you wanna do that?
779
00:56:16,711 --> 00:56:18,170
Come here.
780
00:56:22,050 --> 00:56:25,170
Oaksburg Estates.
781
00:56:25,345 --> 00:56:29,757
I'm a silent partner, so to speak,
with some private investors
782
00:56:29,933 --> 00:56:35,223
who would like to develop this land
into timeshare condominiums.
783
00:56:35,396 --> 00:56:39,264
I believe that's
your field of expertise.
784
00:56:39,442 --> 00:56:42,858
- True.
- 'Course, all this is only possible
785
00:56:43,029 --> 00:56:45,816
in the event the prison
ever closes down.
786
00:56:45,990 --> 00:56:49,655
- Makes sense.
- You know, I'm in the prison business.
787
00:56:49,827 --> 00:56:52,497
I know how to break a man's will,
crush his spirit.
788
00:56:52,664 --> 00:56:56,875
But them real estate contracts,
those things put a real hurt on you.
789
00:56:57,043 --> 00:56:58,585
That's where you come in.
790
00:57:03,341 --> 00:57:06,295
- What's in it for me?
- How would you like to be out of here
791
00:57:06,469 --> 00:57:07,500
in a year?
792
00:57:09,722 --> 00:57:14,052
- But I've got a mandatory minimum.
- Wardens have great discretion
793
00:57:14,227 --> 00:57:19,055
getting early parole, especially
to non-violent, first-time offenders.
794
00:57:19,232 --> 00:57:23,894
- Prisons are crowded, you know.
- The system is corrupt.
795
00:57:24,070 --> 00:57:25,315
Me likey.
796
00:57:25,488 --> 00:57:29,071
But you gotta move the luxury units
closer to the lagoon.
797
00:57:29,242 --> 00:57:31,911
That'll double rents.
Parking goes underground.
798
00:57:32,078 --> 00:57:35,494
Wasting space. Eight extra units.
Whoever designed this is a moron.
799
00:57:35,665 --> 00:57:38,666
- How will you get rid of the prison?
- Let me worry about that.
800
00:57:38,835 --> 00:57:41,160
Tell me more about them parking spaces.
801
00:58:06,738 --> 00:58:09,110
You strapped?
802
00:58:09,282 --> 00:58:11,654
He ain't gonna know what hit him,
nah mean?
803
00:58:24,088 --> 00:58:25,120
Ah!
804
00:58:28,009 --> 00:58:30,334
That's gonna scar, you psycho.
805
00:58:35,433 --> 00:58:37,473
Whoo!
806
00:58:48,238 --> 00:58:50,195
You want that shiv, don't you?
807
00:58:51,866 --> 00:58:54,737
You made that with a melted toothbrush
and a razorblade?
808
00:58:54,911 --> 00:58:56,654
- That's very creative.
- Ah!
809
00:59:02,836 --> 00:59:06,086
Look what I made
with three bars of soap and a shoelace.
810
00:59:07,340 --> 00:59:09,249
Cracker, please.
811
00:59:09,425 --> 00:59:12,877
Hoo! Hoo! Hoo!
812
00:59:26,985 --> 00:59:28,977
Come on, race traitor.
813
00:59:31,656 --> 00:59:33,814
- Ah!
- Ooh!
814
00:59:40,415 --> 00:59:42,039
Oh!
815
00:59:42,750 --> 00:59:45,455
Ha!
816
00:59:45,628 --> 00:59:47,787
Hee-yah!
817
00:59:49,757 --> 00:59:51,382
He's all yours.
818
00:59:53,344 --> 00:59:54,969
This gonna be fun.
819
01:00:04,772 --> 01:00:08,640
Hey, Stan. What'd you do to Patterson?
820
01:00:08,818 --> 01:00:11,190
I just roughed him up a little bit.
821
01:00:11,362 --> 01:00:15,111
- Why?
- Somebody took a shiv to his ass.
822
01:00:15,283 --> 01:00:19,992
They say he'll be shitting sideways
for a month.
823
01:00:20,163 --> 01:00:22,998
Now I know
what schadenfreude feels like.
824
01:00:23,166 --> 01:00:25,040
- What?
- Schadenfreude.
825
01:00:25,210 --> 01:00:28,958
It's German for when you feel good
because your enemy's anus is violated.
826
01:00:29,130 --> 01:00:31,087
Oh.
827
01:00:35,178 --> 01:00:36,969
You know you're getting that on me.
828
01:00:40,975 --> 01:00:43,893
I'm doing great.
You guys are pussies.
829
01:00:44,062 --> 01:00:48,522
That's terrific. Hey, listen, pal.
I need your help.
830
01:00:48,691 --> 01:00:51,941
I can't get Mindy's lawyer
to return my call.
831
01:00:52,111 --> 01:00:54,519
If we wanna go through
with this divorce,
832
01:00:54,697 --> 01:00:58,066
you're going to have
to contact her personally.
833
01:00:58,993 --> 01:01:00,274
Stan.
834
01:01:00,453 --> 01:01:02,113
Yeah. I'll get right on that.
835
01:01:02,288 --> 01:01:05,704
How's the appeal coming?
836
01:01:05,875 --> 01:01:10,833
Believe it or not, I'm looking
at the Madam Foreman right now.
837
01:01:11,005 --> 01:01:12,797
That's great.
838
01:01:12,966 --> 01:01:18,387
I gotta go now.
You know, duty calls.
839
01:01:18,555 --> 01:01:20,843
All right. Thanks, Lew.
I'll talk to you soon.
840
01:01:29,691 --> 01:01:33,060
Ain't you Charlize Theron?
841
01:01:34,571 --> 01:01:37,655
Oh, look what fell out there.
842
01:01:43,913 --> 01:01:47,448
So I had them
exchange the beef for horse meat.
843
01:01:47,625 --> 01:01:50,662
- Clever.
- That's Stan.
844
01:01:50,837 --> 01:01:53,244
Minton, I'd like for you
to meet Mr Dang.
845
01:01:53,423 --> 01:01:55,462
He's on the prison's board of governors.
846
01:01:55,633 --> 01:01:59,678
They let Vietnamese mafia on
the prison board of governors?
847
01:02:01,472 --> 01:02:02,635
Your finger tats.
848
01:02:04,017 --> 01:02:09,640
Like you say, Stan,
the system is corrupt.
849
01:02:09,814 --> 01:02:13,978
Mr Dang's family happens to be
my partners in Oaksburg Estates.
850
01:02:14,152 --> 01:02:16,904
Oh, good, 'cause I was just
going over the contracts.
851
01:02:17,071 --> 01:02:20,191
The language gets rather vague
on gross versus net liability.
852
01:02:20,366 --> 01:02:23,866
I'm sure it's unintentional, but that
could screw you in the long run.
853
01:02:24,037 --> 01:02:29,031
Could it? I'll have my lawyers
correct that immediately.
854
01:02:29,209 --> 01:02:32,660
I got an excellent lawyer for that.
He specialises in it. Lew Popper.
855
01:02:32,837 --> 01:02:36,289
Popper? I'll be sure to contact him.
856
01:02:36,466 --> 01:02:40,333
Come on, Dang,
let's check out the floor show.
857
01:02:46,100 --> 01:02:49,635
It looks like the savages
are ready for the inspection.
858
01:02:49,812 --> 01:02:54,521
Well, give me a few more weeks.
I'll even have 'em readier.
859
01:02:54,692 --> 01:02:56,650
I'm counting on that.
860
01:02:58,112 --> 01:03:00,319
Would you like a strawberry?
861
01:03:01,658 --> 01:03:04,861
- I grew them in my own garden.
- Thank you.
862
01:03:05,036 --> 01:03:07,527
Minton? Strawberry?
863
01:03:08,623 --> 01:03:09,738
No, I'm good.
864
01:03:15,630 --> 01:03:18,750
Maybe I picked 'em
a little too soon.
865
01:03:20,718 --> 01:03:22,676
I don't think that's it.
866
01:03:24,097 --> 01:03:26,670
People
are scared shitless of me.
867
01:03:26,850 --> 01:03:28,178
Very good, Stan.
868
01:03:28,351 --> 01:03:30,640
Is there anyone there
who can challenge you?
869
01:03:30,812 --> 01:03:33,517
Nah. I got it all under control.
870
01:03:33,690 --> 01:03:35,848
What's the matter, Stan?
871
01:03:36,025 --> 01:03:39,229
You sound... distant.
872
01:03:39,404 --> 01:03:41,112
I don't know. It's just...
873
01:03:41,281 --> 01:03:44,981
Don't you ever find yourself
feeling sorry for anybody?
874
01:03:45,159 --> 01:03:48,825
You might as well ask me
if I feel sorry for the maggots
875
01:03:48,997 --> 01:03:50,870
I grind into my morning coffee.
876
01:03:51,040 --> 01:03:54,575
That's how I feel too.
Listen, I gotta go.
877
01:03:54,752 --> 01:03:57,623
Make me proud, Stan.
878
01:03:57,797 --> 01:04:00,466
Come on, baby!
Do it to me!
879
01:04:00,633 --> 01:04:02,959
- Oh, yeah!
- Are you using me?
880
01:04:03,136 --> 01:04:05,342
- No!
- Don't you love me?
881
01:04:05,513 --> 01:04:07,589
- Yeah!
- Show me!
882
01:04:14,814 --> 01:04:17,851
- Do you love me?
- Yeah. Hello. Hey!
883
01:04:18,026 --> 01:04:20,943
Excuse me. Excuse me. Yeah.
884
01:04:21,112 --> 01:04:23,947
Hi, Stan. Yeah.
I think I have good news.
885
01:04:24,115 --> 01:04:28,065
- Do you love me?
- Yeah. I think the... I think the...
886
01:04:28,244 --> 01:04:33,665
The Madam Foreman is just one orgasm
away from giving you your appeal.
887
01:04:33,833 --> 01:04:36,620
That's great, Lew.
And gross.
888
01:04:36,794 --> 01:04:38,834
Heard from Mindy or her attorney?
889
01:04:39,005 --> 01:04:41,081
Uh, no.
890
01:04:41,257 --> 01:04:45,089
But don't say I don't earn my money.
891
01:04:50,642 --> 01:04:54,474
Hi, fellas.
I don't believe I ordered Chinese.
892
01:04:58,024 --> 01:05:01,642
I guess I could go
for a little pot-sticker.
893
01:05:06,533 --> 01:05:08,324
Who are you writing to?
894
01:05:08,493 --> 01:05:10,818
No one special.
895
01:05:12,121 --> 01:05:15,455
You've been sitting there for a while
writing to no one special.
896
01:05:17,669 --> 01:05:22,710
You know, Stan, I've been here for a
long time. I can handle a lot of things.
897
01:05:22,882 --> 01:05:26,583
Like having to spend the rest
of my life in this shithole.
898
01:05:26,761 --> 01:05:30,011
But there's one thing I do regret.
899
01:05:30,181 --> 01:05:33,681
I could never make it work
with Miyoshi.
900
01:05:33,852 --> 01:05:39,854
Oh, she was the only person
who ever loved me for me.
901
01:05:41,818 --> 01:05:44,902
I was too pigheaded to realise it.
902
01:05:45,071 --> 01:05:50,410
I'd give anything
to change the way I behaved.
903
01:05:51,244 --> 01:05:53,035
How did you behave?
904
01:05:54,163 --> 01:05:55,326
I killed her.
905
01:05:57,000 --> 01:05:58,328
Oh.
906
01:05:58,501 --> 01:06:03,329
Alcohol wasn't something that always
brought out the best in me, Stan.
907
01:06:23,484 --> 01:06:27,565
Dear Mindy, I've been
thinking a lot about you lately.
908
01:06:27,739 --> 01:06:29,530
About us.
909
01:06:29,699 --> 01:06:31,857
I realise now that you were right.
910
01:06:32,035 --> 01:06:35,404
I was pigheaded and selfish.
911
01:06:35,580 --> 01:06:39,163
Leaving me was probably
the best thing for you.
912
01:06:39,334 --> 01:06:41,326
And I'm truly sorry.
913
01:06:41,503 --> 01:06:44,207
I never should have hurt you.
914
01:06:44,380 --> 01:06:47,417
I know now why you wanted
to have a baby with me.
915
01:06:47,592 --> 01:06:49,881
It's just another way
for us to love each other
916
01:06:50,053 --> 01:06:52,804
even more deeply.
917
01:06:52,972 --> 01:06:56,507
I hope, someday,
you'll be able to forgive me.
918
01:06:56,684 --> 01:06:59,602
Love always, Stan.
919
01:07:05,026 --> 01:07:06,734
Hey, baby.
920
01:07:15,453 --> 01:07:19,451
Now, I know all of you want to get back
to your weightlifting and basketball
921
01:07:19,624 --> 01:07:23,075
and masturbating, so I'm gonna
try to keep this short. All right?
922
01:07:23,253 --> 01:07:28,757
I am throwing away all of these
violent video games and movies.
923
01:07:30,718 --> 01:07:33,174
Don't do that! No! Come on, man!
924
01:07:33,346 --> 01:07:36,881
From now on, I want you guys
watching more wholesome entertainment.
925
01:07:37,058 --> 01:07:40,557
And frankly, a lot of the rap music
you brothers listen to
926
01:07:40,728 --> 01:07:43,184
was too hateful towards women.
927
01:07:43,356 --> 01:07:46,440
What is up with that?
You like women, right?
928
01:07:46,609 --> 01:07:47,807
Yeah!
929
01:07:47,986 --> 01:07:49,729
Now, on the other hand,
930
01:07:49,904 --> 01:07:53,107
the Mexicans are onto something
with mariachi and salsa music.
931
01:07:57,036 --> 01:08:00,370
It's positive, easy to dance to
and you never get tired of it.
932
01:08:00,540 --> 01:08:03,410
- Shorts, give us a taste.
- Here we go.
933
01:08:39,037 --> 01:08:40,661
Holy shit.
934
01:08:42,832 --> 01:08:45,833
All right. All right, all right.
935
01:08:46,002 --> 01:08:49,537
That's Afro-Cuban. I asked
for mariachi. But you get the point.
936
01:08:49,714 --> 01:08:52,917
All right? Now, lastly,
and most importantly,
937
01:08:53,092 --> 01:08:56,010
from now on, there will
be no more rape at this prison.
938
01:08:56,179 --> 01:08:58,717
No, no!
939
01:08:58,890 --> 01:09:02,259
That's right.
Anyone who rapes another inmate
940
01:09:02,435 --> 01:09:05,306
- will have to answer to me.
- Boo!
941
01:09:05,480 --> 01:09:07,188
I will not be kind.
942
01:09:07,357 --> 01:09:10,227
- Excuse me, Big Stan.
- Yes, Juanito.
943
01:09:10,401 --> 01:09:12,857
Why you putting your nose
where it don't belong?
944
01:09:13,029 --> 01:09:15,271
My men are aggressive and hard.
945
01:09:15,448 --> 01:09:19,316
Sometimes they need a way to work off
that excess energy. What's it to you?
946
01:09:19,494 --> 01:09:22,495
- OK. Well, first off, good question.
- Thank you.
947
01:09:22,664 --> 01:09:26,875
What is it to me?
Well, frankly, I just don't like it.
948
01:09:27,043 --> 01:09:30,910
And let me show you why.
Robbie, come up here.
949
01:09:31,089 --> 01:09:32,963
You, Robbie the hippie.
Come up here.
950
01:09:37,846 --> 01:09:41,760
All right, all right. Robbie, how long
is your sentence here at Oaksburg?
951
01:09:41,933 --> 01:09:45,847
- Five to ten.
- Five to ten years.
952
01:09:46,020 --> 01:09:48,891
What exactly did you do
to earn that sentence?
953
01:09:49,065 --> 01:09:52,564
I sold marijuana.
954
01:09:52,735 --> 01:09:56,401
A shitload of marijuana.
955
01:09:58,616 --> 01:10:00,775
Thanks, Robbie. Go sit down.
956
01:10:00,952 --> 01:10:04,487
He sold marijuana.
He was a marijuana dealer.
957
01:10:04,664 --> 01:10:08,578
I'm not here to argue about drug policy.
I don't think they're tough enough.
958
01:10:08,751 --> 01:10:12,452
Whatever.
959
01:10:12,630 --> 01:10:15,999
But just because Robbie was guilty
of selling dope
960
01:10:16,176 --> 01:10:21,170
doesn't mean he deserves to get raped
up the ass every day for ten years.
961
01:10:21,347 --> 01:10:23,589
I just don't think that's fair.
962
01:10:23,766 --> 01:10:26,803
Some of you are here
963
01:10:26,978 --> 01:10:32,933
because you're habitual drunk drivers.
Some of you have a fondness for crack.
964
01:10:33,109 --> 01:10:36,276
Some of you robbed a bank.
965
01:10:36,446 --> 01:10:40,111
I'm talking to you, Lee Otis.
966
01:10:42,452 --> 01:10:46,284
But that doesn't mean you should
get raped. It's just not fair.
967
01:10:47,957 --> 01:10:51,457
- Yes, Carnahan.
- What about guys convicted of rape?
968
01:10:51,628 --> 01:10:54,961
- Can we rape them?
- Yeah!
969
01:10:55,131 --> 01:10:57,207
Rape the rapists.
Seems appropriate.
970
01:10:57,383 --> 01:10:59,921
Punishment fitting the crime and all.
Go ahead.
971
01:11:00,094 --> 01:11:02,965
That's what I'm talkin' about.
972
01:11:03,139 --> 01:11:07,718
- How about them child molesters?
- Yeah!
973
01:11:07,894 --> 01:11:10,266
Yeah, them too. Good point.
Anyone else?
974
01:11:15,610 --> 01:11:16,808
Big Stan!
975
01:11:16,986 --> 01:11:21,316
- What about the counterfeiters?
- What?
976
01:11:21,491 --> 01:11:25,820
Counterfeiters? Big Raymond,
you're the only counterfeiter here.
977
01:11:25,995 --> 01:11:28,830
Yeah!
978
01:11:28,998 --> 01:11:32,165
Wait a minute.
Do you just want somebody to...
979
01:11:32,335 --> 01:11:34,707
Aw!
980
01:11:34,879 --> 01:11:37,038
OK, here's another thing
we gotta clear up.
981
01:11:37,215 --> 01:11:40,335
There's a difference
between homosexual sex and rape.
982
01:11:40,510 --> 01:11:44,093
- Now, Big Raymond.
- Hm?
983
01:11:44,264 --> 01:11:47,099
There's someone here
who wants to have sex with you.
984
01:11:47,267 --> 01:11:49,758
- Not me!
- OK? How about it, anyone?
985
01:11:51,771 --> 01:11:54,855
Yeah. Yeah.
986
01:11:59,279 --> 01:12:01,188
Tyler!
987
01:12:01,364 --> 01:12:05,907
- Great!
- Man!
988
01:12:15,420 --> 01:12:18,540
You two have fun.
But wear protection.
989
01:12:18,715 --> 01:12:20,707
OK.
990
01:12:20,884 --> 01:12:25,592
All right, grow up. Look, if you've got
a problem with that, then that's...
991
01:12:29,517 --> 01:12:30,976
Nurse!
992
01:12:37,275 --> 01:12:41,142
Now, those two are about to have
consensual homosexual sex.
993
01:12:41,321 --> 01:12:44,322
A beautiful, beautiful thing.
The total opposite of rape,
994
01:12:44,490 --> 01:12:47,694
- which is not allowed.
- Except for rapists and molesters?
995
01:12:47,869 --> 01:12:50,075
- We can still rape them.
- No, you can't.
996
01:12:50,246 --> 01:12:53,662
- What?
- I changed my mind.
997
01:12:53,833 --> 01:12:55,411
Bad habit. Quit cold turkey.
998
01:12:55,585 --> 01:12:59,001
If you're not happy with it,
999
01:12:59,172 --> 01:13:02,920
you're welcome to fight me.
1000
01:13:03,843 --> 01:13:06,417
I didn't think so.
All right, you're dismissed.
1001
01:13:06,596 --> 01:13:08,802
Beat it.
1002
01:13:10,225 --> 01:13:12,716
- Good speech.
- You think?
1003
01:13:12,894 --> 01:13:15,811
- I should have opened with a joke.
- No, it was good.
1004
01:13:15,980 --> 01:13:19,266
- Yeah?
- Yeah. Sorry about the mariachi.
1005
01:13:19,442 --> 01:13:20,640
Let it go.
1006
01:13:22,654 --> 01:13:27,066
Hey, Big Stan.
Check out the lovebirds.
1007
01:13:29,661 --> 01:13:32,578
One for you!
1008
01:13:32,747 --> 01:13:35,665
Mm! One for you.
1009
01:13:36,835 --> 01:13:38,033
Good for them.
1010
01:13:39,671 --> 01:13:41,912
I have something important to show you.
1011
01:13:42,090 --> 01:13:43,252
Let me eat, will you?
1012
01:13:43,424 --> 01:13:44,669
Hey, Big Stan.
1013
01:13:46,719 --> 01:13:50,135
- Can we talk?
- Make it quick.
1014
01:13:50,306 --> 01:13:52,513
I wanna thank you
for what you did out there.
1015
01:13:52,684 --> 01:13:56,053
- I didn't do anything...
- Don't say you didn't do it for me.
1016
01:13:56,229 --> 01:13:59,396
Because you did, didn't you?
1017
01:14:00,733 --> 01:14:03,937
- A little.
- Well, thanks.
1018
01:14:04,112 --> 01:14:07,528
- Yeah. Thanks, man.
- Julio!
1019
01:14:07,699 --> 01:14:10,403
Get back here!
What's up with you?
1020
01:14:10,577 --> 01:14:11,691
Shut up!
1021
01:14:14,873 --> 01:14:17,957
Hey, Big Stan.
I like what you said.
1022
01:14:18,126 --> 01:14:19,537
I wanna join your gang.
1023
01:14:21,546 --> 01:14:25,246
- I don't have a gang.
- Yes, you do.
1024
01:14:29,679 --> 01:14:30,877
OK, you're in.
1025
01:14:33,308 --> 01:14:36,926
Me too?
1026
01:14:41,941 --> 01:14:46,437
Yeah, you too.
1027
01:14:49,157 --> 01:14:52,027
- All of you.
- Thanks.
1028
01:14:53,286 --> 01:14:56,619
Yeah! Ow!
1029
01:14:56,789 --> 01:14:59,197
All right, can I eat now?
1030
01:15:01,794 --> 01:15:04,998
- Yes, you did!
- He's gotta eat.
1031
01:15:08,801 --> 01:15:11,471
I told you I had something important
to show you.
1032
01:15:17,810 --> 01:15:18,925
From Mindy.
1033
01:15:28,154 --> 01:15:29,565
She wants to see me.
1034
01:15:37,163 --> 01:15:38,907
Hoo-hoo-hoo!
1035
01:15:53,263 --> 01:15:54,757
Shake hands.
1036
01:15:58,268 --> 01:16:00,344
Try to get along, huh?
1037
01:16:08,611 --> 01:16:10,070
Thanks.
1038
01:16:22,417 --> 01:16:25,537
- Excuse me, man.
- No, that was my bad.
1039
01:16:25,712 --> 01:16:28,333
No, really. It was my fault.
1040
01:16:28,506 --> 01:16:31,673
There's a pickup game of hoops later,
if you wanna play.
1041
01:16:31,843 --> 01:16:32,922
I'd like that.
1042
01:17:13,843 --> 01:17:17,508
- Happy birthday.
- Ah! Thank you!
1043
01:17:17,680 --> 01:17:20,432
- Oh, look, a shiv!
- Yeah!
1044
01:17:20,600 --> 01:17:22,094
- Hey, homes.
- Mm! Mm!
1045
01:17:22,268 --> 01:17:24,759
- Hey.
- Hey!
1046
01:17:56,010 --> 01:17:58,133
Stanley! Honey bear!
1047
01:17:58,304 --> 01:18:00,593
I loved your letter!
1048
01:18:00,765 --> 01:18:03,600
I missed you so much.
1049
01:18:03,768 --> 01:18:07,813
Before we go any further, there's
three little words I need to hear.
1050
01:18:07,981 --> 01:18:10,935
- I was wrong?
- Good boy!
1051
01:18:13,862 --> 01:18:16,862
It looks like
a nursery school picnic out there.
1052
01:18:17,031 --> 01:18:18,574
It's Minton.
1053
01:18:19,784 --> 01:18:23,996
- What do you mean, it's Minton?
- Well, first he banned rape.
1054
01:18:24,163 --> 01:18:26,452
It's to the point
that anybody gets beat up,
1055
01:18:26,624 --> 01:18:29,874
they run and join Minton's gang
and Minton beats up the bad guy.
1056
01:18:30,044 --> 01:18:33,248
The truth, he's got them too scared
to look at each other funny.
1057
01:18:33,423 --> 01:18:37,171
- We ain't had a fight in three days.
- I thought I saw Ingleberg fight
1058
01:18:37,343 --> 01:18:40,463
that big Mexican yesterday, Jesus.
1059
01:18:40,638 --> 01:18:44,422
Oh, no, that was more in the nature
of a lovers' quarrel.
1060
01:18:44,601 --> 01:18:47,008
Ingleberg forgot their
two-week anniversary.
1061
01:18:47,187 --> 01:18:49,891
That wasn't very nice of him, was it?
1062
01:18:50,064 --> 01:18:54,145
Well, they made up. You should
have seen the cake Ingleberg made.
1063
01:18:54,319 --> 01:18:56,810
- It was special...
- You get out of here right now
1064
01:18:56,988 --> 01:19:00,606
and get Minton up here!
You understand me? I mean right now!
1065
01:19:00,783 --> 01:19:03,950
Now hurry!
1066
01:19:05,580 --> 01:19:09,447
I'm not just saying this, but I think
that was the most amazing sex
1067
01:19:09,626 --> 01:19:12,377
we've ever had.
1068
01:19:12,545 --> 01:19:15,297
I guess being away from me
this long made you crazy.
1069
01:19:15,465 --> 01:19:19,593
Well, yes, I guess.
The Master's opened my eyes, sexually.
1070
01:19:19,761 --> 01:19:23,130
He showed me all these different
positions in the Kama Sutra.
1071
01:19:23,306 --> 01:19:26,757
- The Master? You been seeing him?
- Yeah, he's staying at the house.
1072
01:19:26,935 --> 01:19:30,054
I've learned about massage
and strengthening my Kegels.
1073
01:19:30,230 --> 01:19:33,396
That sleazy son of a bitch!
1074
01:19:33,566 --> 01:19:35,891
- Minton, time's up.
- But Stan, I...
1075
01:19:36,069 --> 01:19:39,936
- Warden wants to see you now!
- Wait. I don't want you to see him.
1076
01:19:40,114 --> 01:19:44,527
You tell Master Dickface I'm gonna get
out of here soon and kick his ass!
1077
01:19:44,702 --> 01:19:47,075
Don't tell him.
You're not allowed to see him.
1078
01:19:47,247 --> 01:19:49,370
I said now, convict!
1079
01:19:49,541 --> 01:19:51,248
- Minton!
- Not allowed to see him!
1080
01:19:51,417 --> 01:19:53,624
- I love you, sweetie-cakes!
- Let's go.
1081
01:19:53,795 --> 01:19:55,419
Cocksucker!
1082
01:20:04,931 --> 01:20:07,636
I'll bet you didn't know
I was part psychic.
1083
01:20:09,686 --> 01:20:14,146
That's right.
I'm able to see into the future.
1084
01:20:15,775 --> 01:20:18,859
- I didn't realise.
- Let me tell you what's going to happen
1085
01:20:19,028 --> 01:20:21,270
one week from today.
1086
01:20:24,200 --> 01:20:27,534
The board of governors
is gonna come to inspect the prison.
1087
01:20:27,704 --> 01:20:31,832
And something awful happens.
1088
01:20:32,000 --> 01:20:36,412
Some prisoners find a way
to smuggle weapons into the yard.
1089
01:20:36,588 --> 01:20:39,209
And a full-scale riot breaks out.
1090
01:20:39,382 --> 01:20:43,546
And as the prison board watches
in absolute horror,
1091
01:20:43,720 --> 01:20:47,848
my men are forced to shoot
into the yard in order
1092
01:20:48,016 --> 01:20:51,017
to end the melee.
1093
01:20:51,186 --> 01:20:56,262
In the ensuing scandal,
the Board chooses to sell the property
1094
01:20:56,441 --> 01:20:59,857
to a Vietnamese family
1095
01:21:00,028 --> 01:21:02,779
based in San Pedro.
1096
01:21:02,947 --> 01:21:06,233
And everybody lives happily ever after.
1097
01:21:07,327 --> 01:21:08,987
Especially me.
1098
01:21:09,162 --> 01:21:13,456
Now, if the events that I foretold
1099
01:21:13,625 --> 01:21:16,080
do not come to fruition...
1100
01:21:17,837 --> 01:21:21,123
...I will be very disappointed.
1101
01:21:28,598 --> 01:21:30,674
And when I get disappointed,
1102
01:21:30,850 --> 01:21:33,057
Mr Deng over there
1103
01:21:33,228 --> 01:21:37,973
likes to stomp on men's spines
like they was bubble wrap.
1104
01:21:51,913 --> 01:21:56,491
I spent 35 years of my life
1105
01:21:56,668 --> 01:22:00,202
in this stinking cesspool.
1106
01:22:00,380 --> 01:22:04,958
And I will not walk away
without something to show for it.
1107
01:22:06,261 --> 01:22:09,297
Your little prison reform
ends right now.
1108
01:22:10,265 --> 01:22:14,558
You play ball,
you might get yourself a parole hearing.
1109
01:22:14,727 --> 01:22:17,432
How many will get killed?
1110
01:22:17,605 --> 01:22:22,600
Who cares? They're all animals.
1111
01:22:24,737 --> 01:22:26,148
Bullard!
1112
01:22:28,491 --> 01:22:32,987
- Escort Mr Minton back to his cell.
- Yes, sir. Come on, Minton.
1113
01:22:38,626 --> 01:22:41,876
Stan, you ever have two Asian men
pounding your balls
1114
01:22:42,046 --> 01:22:44,917
after sex with a questionably
attractive older woman?
1115
01:22:45,091 --> 01:22:47,416
No, I can't say I have, Lew.
1116
01:22:47,594 --> 01:22:51,461
Madam Foreman won't return
any of my calls.
1117
01:22:51,639 --> 01:22:54,759
You better go for that deal
the warden offered you.
1118
01:22:54,934 --> 01:22:59,727
- So there's nothing else I can do?
- I'm sorry, pal. It's over.
1119
01:22:59,898 --> 01:23:02,186
You're in real danger.
1120
01:23:02,358 --> 01:23:05,110
Get yourself out of there
as soon as you can.
1121
01:23:33,014 --> 01:23:34,722
Bullard.
1122
01:23:36,100 --> 01:23:37,927
Tell the warden I'll take his deal.
1123
01:23:39,479 --> 01:23:41,056
I want out of here.
1124
01:23:48,863 --> 01:23:52,528
Hey, Stan. The Nazis were saying
the Virgin Mary tortilla's a fake.
1125
01:23:52,700 --> 01:23:55,701
- That's not cool, homes.
- Hey, the Nazis were saying
1126
01:23:55,870 --> 01:23:57,530
the Virgin Mary has no power.
1127
01:23:57,705 --> 01:24:00,825
Constantine was pacifying
the Byzantine priest by giving him
1128
01:24:01,000 --> 01:24:04,701
a goddess to pray to. They've been
watching the History Channel.
1129
01:24:04,879 --> 01:24:08,165
- What?
- What are you gonna do about it?
1130
01:24:08,341 --> 01:24:11,093
I'm not gonna do anything about it.
1131
01:24:13,513 --> 01:24:14,841
What's up with him, man?
1132
01:24:15,014 --> 01:24:18,015
Hey, Stan. Stan!
1133
01:24:18,601 --> 01:24:22,136
The Brazilians won't
stop calling Farib an Arab.
1134
01:24:22,313 --> 01:24:25,184
I'm not an Arab! I'm Persian.
1135
01:24:25,358 --> 01:24:28,561
What do I care?
You look like an Arab.
1136
01:24:29,612 --> 01:24:32,364
Hey, listen up! All of you!
1137
01:24:33,950 --> 01:24:36,986
You're all on your own!
You hear me?
1138
01:24:37,161 --> 01:24:39,653
I don't care what any of you
do to each other!
1139
01:24:39,831 --> 01:24:42,404
Hey, you guys!
1140
01:24:43,877 --> 01:24:45,501
An interracial book club.
1141
01:24:47,505 --> 01:24:50,708
You guys all hate each other.
So stop pretending you don't.
1142
01:24:50,884 --> 01:24:54,549
- You don't know about Macbeth.
- Fuck you, motherfucker!
1143
01:25:17,160 --> 01:25:20,529
Yeah, that's more like it. Yes, sir.
1144
01:25:38,097 --> 01:25:39,508
Big Stan?
1145
01:25:42,018 --> 01:25:43,560
We need to talk.
1146
01:26:00,537 --> 01:26:02,244
I thought you cared about us.
1147
01:26:04,582 --> 01:26:05,958
Well, I don't.
1148
01:26:13,466 --> 01:26:16,004
Hey, little cracker.
1149
01:26:17,554 --> 01:26:21,338
Why don't you sit over here,
my little white brother.
1150
01:26:35,572 --> 01:26:37,363
Here, have mine.
1151
01:26:38,366 --> 01:26:40,572
I'm gonna need to shave your head.
1152
01:26:40,743 --> 01:26:44,409
Put a couple little tattoos
on your forehead, huh?
1153
01:26:45,415 --> 01:26:46,826
Come on, eat up.
1154
01:26:50,712 --> 01:26:53,000
I was wrong about you.
1155
01:26:53,173 --> 01:26:55,082
We all were.
1156
01:26:56,759 --> 01:27:00,175
Stay out of the yard tomorrow.
You hear me?
1157
01:27:06,895 --> 01:27:10,727
D- block houses some
of our most hardened offenders.
1158
01:27:10,899 --> 01:27:15,525
But here, we have Oaksburg's
greatest rehabilitation story.
1159
01:27:15,695 --> 01:27:20,357
Stan Minton. Stan, I'd like for you
to meet the board of governors.
1160
01:27:21,743 --> 01:27:24,364
Not going in the yard today, Stan?
1161
01:27:24,537 --> 01:27:27,823
- I don't feel well, warden.
- Maybe this will make you feel better.
1162
01:27:27,999 --> 01:27:31,913
Due to Stan's exemplary behaviour,
the parole board has agreed
1163
01:27:32,086 --> 01:27:34,494
to meet with him today.
1164
01:27:35,256 --> 01:27:37,830
Well, we better be moving along.
1165
01:27:43,306 --> 01:27:46,390
The shit goes down at 12.30.
1166
01:27:46,559 --> 01:27:50,937
At 12.35,
I'm in the real estate business.
1167
01:28:23,930 --> 01:28:26,088
Stan! Honey!
1168
01:28:29,561 --> 01:28:31,518
- I'll deal with you in a minute.
- Everything OK?
1169
01:28:31,688 --> 01:28:33,182
Both of you.
1170
01:28:37,569 --> 01:28:40,523
Next up is prisoner 5824.
1171
01:28:41,239 --> 01:28:43,991
In the matter of Stanley Minton.
You have your files.
1172
01:28:47,662 --> 01:28:51,612
In his time here, Minton
has accrued an exemplary record.
1173
01:28:51,791 --> 01:28:55,290
And let it be noted,
he's a first-time non-violent offender.
1174
01:29:01,301 --> 01:29:03,708
Hold up!
1175
01:29:03,887 --> 01:29:07,137
Before we vote, Mr Minton, is there
anything you'd like to add?
1176
01:29:07,307 --> 01:29:10,557
I'd just like to say, um...
1177
01:29:10,727 --> 01:29:12,850
...I've really learned a lot.
1178
01:29:13,021 --> 01:29:15,476
And I'm ready to get back to work.
1179
01:29:17,150 --> 01:29:19,308
Good, we like to hear that.
1180
01:29:20,653 --> 01:29:23,903
Here's the yard where the prisoners
come to exercise.
1181
01:29:24,073 --> 01:29:27,656
That's where Charlie the Fly
tried to fly over the wall.
1182
01:29:27,827 --> 01:29:31,113
Well, in light of Warden Gasque's
recommendation,
1183
01:29:31,289 --> 01:29:34,788
I think we have a pretty
clear-cut case for parole.
1184
01:29:37,378 --> 01:29:39,667
Mr Minton?
1185
01:29:42,175 --> 01:29:45,425
How would you feel
about getting out of here today?
1186
01:29:49,724 --> 01:29:51,384
Mr Minton?
1187
01:29:55,563 --> 01:29:57,307
Did I mention I'm in real estate?
1188
01:29:58,525 --> 01:30:02,107
I got my eye on some property
real close by here
1189
01:30:02,278 --> 01:30:06,490
- I can't wait to develop.
- Hm. That's commendable.
1190
01:30:06,658 --> 01:30:10,276
You know, while I was in here,
also, I joined a biker gang.
1191
01:30:10,453 --> 01:30:13,288
Satan's Paedophiles.
1192
01:30:13,456 --> 01:30:15,532
Anyway, they said when I get out,
1193
01:30:15,708 --> 01:30:18,662
they'd love to camp next
to the grammar school near here.
1194
01:30:18,837 --> 01:30:20,247
I hope that's not a problem.
1195
01:30:20,421 --> 01:30:24,918
They're pretty cool guys, except
when they drink and do crystal meth.
1196
01:30:25,093 --> 01:30:26,670
Which is almost every weekend.
1197
01:30:26,845 --> 01:30:31,637
But most of the people I sell to,
they don't need to know about that.
1198
01:30:31,808 --> 01:30:35,936
'Cause, uh, they're old ladies, mostly.
Not too good with fine print,
1199
01:30:36,104 --> 01:30:37,218
if you get my drift.
1200
01:30:38,898 --> 01:30:42,647
Tell me, is your grandma still alive?
I bet I could make her a sweet deal.
1201
01:30:42,819 --> 01:30:44,895
By the time I'm through with her,
1202
01:30:45,071 --> 01:30:49,863
she'll give hand jobs behind the pharmacy
to pay for arthritis medication.
1203
01:30:51,661 --> 01:30:54,697
Two at a time, you know?
Stuff you see in pornos.
1204
01:30:56,833 --> 01:31:00,878
Anyway, that's a nice top you have on.
Seriously.
1205
01:31:01,045 --> 01:31:03,750
Mind lowering it?
I'd love to see some boobage.
1206
01:31:04,966 --> 01:31:07,967
Let me see that, woman. That's sexy.
Let me see that.
1207
01:31:08,136 --> 01:31:11,421
Let me touch one of them.
Let me touch one of them. Can I? Please?
1208
01:31:11,598 --> 01:31:14,219
Parole denied!
Take him back to his cell!
1209
01:31:14,392 --> 01:31:18,224
What colour are your nipples?
I bet they're pink! Light brown?
1210
01:31:18,396 --> 01:31:19,890
Dollar size or quarter?
1211
01:31:22,567 --> 01:31:24,939
Stan, did we win?
1212
01:31:25,111 --> 01:31:26,938
Let go of me. I'm in a hurry.
1213
01:31:27,113 --> 01:31:28,488
Have no fear, Stanley.
1214
01:31:28,656 --> 01:31:32,357
I will continue to take care
of your wife while you're gone.
1215
01:31:32,535 --> 01:31:35,157
- Thanks a lot, pal.
- No thanks needed.
1216
01:31:35,330 --> 01:31:38,117
I cherish Mindy's company.
1217
01:31:38,291 --> 01:31:42,205
Since my addiction to cigarettes
made me impotent,
1218
01:31:42,378 --> 01:31:45,415
I've had very little contact
with the fair sex.
1219
01:31:46,382 --> 01:31:47,793
Impotent?
1220
01:31:47,967 --> 01:31:50,209
I used to think smoking was cool,
1221
01:31:50,386 --> 01:31:56,140
but a limp dick spells nerd
in any language.
1222
01:31:56,309 --> 01:31:59,345
- You're impotent. That's great!
- Not really.
1223
01:32:00,230 --> 01:32:02,803
Baby, I love you.
I'll write to you as soon as I can.
1224
01:32:02,982 --> 01:32:04,774
OK.
1225
01:32:07,987 --> 01:32:10,110
That's my boy.
1226
01:32:10,782 --> 01:32:12,241
Love you, baby!
1227
01:32:13,618 --> 01:32:16,323
- He's running!
- Code red!
1228
01:32:16,496 --> 01:32:18,868
Watch the prisoners file in.
1229
01:32:54,033 --> 01:32:55,907
The Master has taught you well.
1230
01:32:56,077 --> 01:32:59,612
Don't tell me.
You studied with The Master too?
1231
01:32:59,789 --> 01:33:04,498
- I am his number one.
- I didn't see that coming.
1232
01:33:04,669 --> 01:33:07,623
There are many things
you will not see coming.
1233
01:33:07,797 --> 01:33:10,371
Oh, really? Like what?
1234
01:33:19,893 --> 01:33:20,972
Hmm.
1235
01:33:25,106 --> 01:33:29,982
- Whoa. Take it easy.
- I have been taking it easy.
1236
01:33:38,369 --> 01:33:40,943
I wanna break me off
some chocolate.
1237
01:33:41,122 --> 01:33:42,996
Come on, hold the line.
1238
01:33:44,918 --> 01:33:47,753
- Top you up here?
- Thank you very much.
1239
01:33:48,588 --> 01:33:50,746
How are you doing?
1240
01:33:50,924 --> 01:33:51,955
Yeah, good.
1241
01:34:07,315 --> 01:34:11,941
I don't think The Master
prepares you for this.
1242
01:34:17,033 --> 01:34:19,524
Here comes the eagle.
1243
01:34:51,192 --> 01:34:52,936
Are those weapons?
1244
01:35:00,869 --> 01:35:02,660
Hoo, hoo, hoo!
1245
01:35:03,830 --> 01:35:05,538
Ah!
1246
01:35:09,502 --> 01:35:12,373
Somebody didn't strengthen
their titties.
1247
01:35:15,049 --> 01:35:16,460
Whoo!
1248
01:35:23,099 --> 01:35:24,677
It looks like a riot.
1249
01:35:47,874 --> 01:35:49,701
Whoo!
1250
01:35:53,171 --> 01:35:55,626
- I celebrated too early!
- Ah!
1251
01:36:08,144 --> 01:36:10,979
Warden, can't you do anything
to stop this?
1252
01:36:11,147 --> 01:36:15,311
Bullard, prepare to fire.
1253
01:36:46,558 --> 01:36:48,016
Whoo!
1254
01:36:48,184 --> 01:36:50,889
Whoo! Whoo!
1255
01:36:54,315 --> 01:36:55,596
Whoo!
1256
01:36:56,484 --> 01:36:58,062
Finger of death.
1257
01:37:05,285 --> 01:37:06,695
That's you.
1258
01:37:12,750 --> 01:37:16,001
I don't know if The Master
prepared you for this.
1259
01:37:22,343 --> 01:37:24,087
Hoo!
1260
01:37:29,684 --> 01:37:33,267
- Ready to dance, motherfuckers?
- Handle your shit, bitch!
1261
01:37:33,438 --> 01:37:34,636
Fire at will.
1262
01:37:36,524 --> 01:37:37,687
Don't fight!
1263
01:38:30,203 --> 01:38:31,578
Why aren't you firing?
1264
01:38:39,712 --> 01:38:42,832
- Fire that weapon.
- I can't do it, boss.
1265
01:38:45,385 --> 01:38:47,543
Well, why the hell not?
1266
01:38:47,720 --> 01:38:50,211
They're just dancing.
1267
01:38:59,607 --> 01:39:01,600
Give me that rifle.
1268
01:39:07,240 --> 01:39:08,864
What the hell are you doing?
1269
01:39:09,993 --> 01:39:11,487
Restoring order.
1270
01:39:12,662 --> 01:39:15,200
They've clearly lost their minds.
1271
01:39:15,373 --> 01:39:17,200
Warden, it's over.
1272
01:39:19,586 --> 01:39:21,210
Look at all these witnesses.
1273
01:39:21,379 --> 01:39:23,751
It's over, warden.
1274
01:39:28,052 --> 01:39:29,879
You did this to me.
1275
01:39:47,530 --> 01:39:50,531
- Where did that come from?
- What do you think I've been doing
1276
01:39:50,700 --> 01:39:52,942
with The Master for the last six months?
1277
01:39:53,119 --> 01:39:55,076
Thank God.
1278
01:39:55,246 --> 01:39:56,990
You did good with Dang.
1279
01:39:57,165 --> 01:39:59,952
But you're still
my number two student.
1280
01:40:00,126 --> 01:40:03,744
- Number two?
- She'll kick your ass.
1281
01:40:06,257 --> 01:40:08,297
I might like that.
1282
01:40:09,928 --> 01:40:12,253
Ready position!
1283
01:40:12,430 --> 01:40:14,423
Focus!
1284
01:40:14,599 --> 01:40:16,342
Lock! Punch!
1285
01:40:16,518 --> 01:40:18,890
- Kick! Double punch!
- Yah!
1286
01:40:19,062 --> 01:40:21,813
Ready position!
1287
01:40:21,981 --> 01:40:23,938
Lock! Punch!
1288
01:40:24,108 --> 01:40:26,896
- Kick! Double punch!
- Yah!
1289
01:40:27,070 --> 01:40:29,739
- It's time, Minton.
- Just a minute, warden.
1290
01:40:29,906 --> 01:40:32,658
Looks great, guys.
Thanks, Robbie.
1291
01:40:32,825 --> 01:40:35,992
OK, everybody, I gotta go now.
1292
01:40:36,162 --> 01:40:40,076
I'll miss you too.
1293
01:40:40,250 --> 01:40:43,784
I want you guys to be especially nice
to our newest inmate
1294
01:40:43,962 --> 01:40:47,496
and best disbarred lawyer
in the world, Lew Popper.
1295
01:40:47,674 --> 01:40:50,509
- Welcome aboard!
- Lew!
1296
01:40:50,677 --> 01:40:55,006
- Is the ban on rape still in effect?
- I'm pretty sure.
1297
01:40:55,181 --> 01:40:57,470
Hey!
1298
01:40:57,642 --> 01:41:02,185
Permission to give Big Stan
a group hug.
1299
01:41:02,355 --> 01:41:04,348
- Permission granted.
- Come on, gang!
1300
01:41:12,448 --> 01:41:16,280
Hey, little homey,
thanks for giving me my teeth back.
1301
01:41:16,452 --> 01:41:19,868
My pleasure.
1302
01:41:24,669 --> 01:41:27,374
- Where you going, cracker?
- I'm going home, man.
1303
01:41:27,547 --> 01:41:31,414
- I think Big Stan is staying here.
- Oh, yeah?
1304
01:41:34,554 --> 01:41:35,669
Oh, shit!
1305
01:41:38,683 --> 01:41:41,388
I'm Big Stan.
No more rape.
1306
01:41:41,561 --> 01:41:43,388
Aw, very creepy.
1307
01:41:44,689 --> 01:41:45,768
My cracker.
1308
01:41:47,150 --> 01:41:48,430
Be good, huh?
1309
01:41:49,986 --> 01:41:52,144
Bye, Stan!
1310
01:41:52,947 --> 01:41:54,987
Hey. Hey.
1311
01:41:58,119 --> 01:41:59,150
Whoo!
1312
01:41:59,329 --> 01:42:02,863
- Big man.
- Bye, Big Stan.
1313
01:42:03,041 --> 01:42:04,618
Say bye.
1314
01:42:10,798 --> 01:42:11,878
Stan!
1315
01:42:14,427 --> 01:42:16,799
Sweetie.
1316
01:42:16,971 --> 01:42:18,928
Hey, handsome.
1317
01:42:19,098 --> 01:42:21,305
- Where's Mindy Junior?
- In the car.
1318
01:42:21,476 --> 01:42:24,560
- She's being kind of a brat.
- Isn't the nanny helping?
1319
01:42:24,729 --> 01:42:27,434
Yeah. I think he
still sneaks cigarettes.
1320
01:42:27,607 --> 01:42:30,312
Yeah? I'll talk to him.
1321
01:42:35,865 --> 01:42:38,617
Hi, precious. Hi, The Master.
1322
01:42:38,785 --> 01:42:41,406
- Say hello to your father, child.
- Hi.
1323
01:42:41,579 --> 01:42:44,948
- Rumour is you're sneaking smokes.
- Shh.
1324
01:42:45,792 --> 01:42:49,327
- How's her technique?
- She stinks.
1325
01:42:49,504 --> 01:42:51,247
But so did you at first.
1326
01:42:51,422 --> 01:42:54,293
You sure? I don't remember that.
1327
01:42:54,467 --> 01:42:56,341
- Stan!
- OK, baby.
1328
01:42:56,511 --> 01:42:58,385
Let's go, sweetie!
1329
01:43:04,423 --> 01:43:15,217
Subtitle By : Robin808