1
00:00:02,294 --> 00:00:03,962
[Knocking] [Mac] Dee.
Dee. Dee. Dee.
2
00:00:04,046 --> 00:00:05,964
Sweet Dee. Sweet Dee. Sweet Dee.
Sweet Dee. [ Dennis] Hey!
3
00:00:06,048 --> 00:00:07,758
Sweet Dee. Sweet Dee. Sweet Dee.
Sweet Dee. Sweet Dee.
4
00:00:07,883 --> 00:00:09,301
What?
Hey.
5
00:00:09,426 --> 00:00:11,136
Hey- Oh-
What the hell is this?
6
00:00:11,220 --> 00:00:12,804
- Oh, yeah.
- [ Purring]
7
00:00:12,888 --> 00:00:15,140
- [Dennis] Uh-oh.
- And so it begins.
8
00:00:15,224 --> 00:00:17,434
- Mmm. - What are you talking
about? I got a cat. So what?
9
00:00:17,559 --> 00:00:21,980
Congratulations, Dee. You've begun your
transformation into crazy cat lady.
10
00:00:22,064 --> 00:00:24,483
I didn't begin a transformation.
I just- I just got a cat...
11
00:00:24,566 --> 00:00:26,485
'cause I wanted
something to hang outwith.
12
00:00:26,568 --> 00:00:28,820
I don't have, you know,
a roommate or anything,
13
00:00:28,904 --> 00:00:31,198
and I don't really have
anyone to talk to, so I-
14
00:00:31,281 --> 00:00:33,700
If you listen to yourself, you would realize
you're only strengthening our argument.
15
00:00:33,825 --> 00:00:35,869
What do you want?
We need a big bowl for popcorn.
16
00:00:35,953 --> 00:00:37,788
- Yeah!
- Mac and Dennis movie night!
17
00:00:37,871 --> 00:00:39,748
Whoosh!
Tuesday night's movie night!
18
00:00:39,831 --> 00:00:41,333
We're doing Predator again.
19
00:00:41,416 --> 00:00:43,168
You guys don't have a bowl?
Um-
20
00:00:43,293 --> 00:00:47,130
We don't have a big one, no. Not a big
enough one for what we need, Dee.
21
00:00:47,256 --> 00:00:49,007
[ Clattering ] All right!
Be careful! Come on!
22
00:00:49,132 --> 00:00:50,551
These cups suck.
You serious?
23
00:00:50,634 --> 00:00:52,135
Yeah. Oh!
Bingo.
24
00:00:52,219 --> 00:00:53,679
Yeah, you found it.
Nice.
25
00:00:53,762 --> 00:00:56,723
Why did you guys have to both
come over here to get one bowl?
26
00:00:56,848 --> 00:00:59,351
It's more fun if we both come.
I was gonna hold the bowl.
27
00:00:59,476 --> 00:01:02,145
Dennis was gonna stand next to me and
make snide comments. Yeah. That's right.
28
00:01:02,271 --> 00:01:04,064
Oh, you look like a bird.
That's one. Uh- Old.
29
00:01:04,189 --> 00:01:06,650
Pick a new one. You got a new one?
it's an oldie but goodie.
30
00:01:06,733 --> 00:01:08,944
- He comes up with good ones.
- Yeah, no. That was a good one.
31
00:01:09,027 --> 00:01:12,072
I don't understand why you can't make snide
remarks and hold a bowl at the same time though.
32
00:01:12,197 --> 00:01:14,658
It doesn't make sense. You're fixating
too much on the bowl aspect of it.
33
00:01:14,741 --> 00:01:16,785
Put it this way. If the two
of us didn't come together,
34
00:01:16,910 --> 00:01:18,996
what if one of us were
to get into a jam? Mmm.
35
00:01:19,079 --> 00:01:20,581
Be silly not to have
the other one there.
36
00:01:20,706 --> 00:01:23,000
Silly? Dennis, that sounds
downright dangerous. Yeah.
37
00:01:23,125 --> 00:01:26,837
See, you'll never get out of a jam because
you got no friends. Well, you're a spinster.
38
00:01:26,962 --> 00:01:28,046
Mm-hmm.
A lonely spinster.
39
00:01:28,130 --> 00:01:29,756
With a cat.
40
00:01:29,881 --> 00:01:31,717
[Both Giggling]
Those are all funny.
41
00:01:31,800 --> 00:01:34,469
It's funny 'cause I feel like you
guys are two codependent losers...
42
00:01:34,553 --> 00:01:36,054
who are so wrapped up
in each other...
43
00:01:36,138 --> 00:01:38,265
that it's hard for you to see
how pathetic your lives are.
44
00:01:38,348 --> 00:01:39,808
It's like you're
an old married couple.
45
00:01:39,891 --> 00:01:42,311
No,Dee.
We're more like a dynamic duo.
46
00:01:42,394 --> 00:01:44,396
So you don't think that
two 30-year-old men...
47
00:01:44,479 --> 00:01:47,983
who spend every waking moment
together is a little bit pathetic?
48
00:01:48,066 --> 00:01:49,901
Well, we don't spend every
waking moment together.
49
00:01:49,985 --> 00:01:51,778
- What are you, crazy?
- You're right. I'm sorry.
50
00:01:51,862 --> 00:01:54,948
When was the last time you went more
than an hour without seeing each other?
51
00:01:55,073 --> 00:01:56,908
All the time.
Every day.
52
00:01:56,992 --> 00:01:59,745
- Okay. Without checking in?
- Ch- Checking. That's-
53
00:01:59,870 --> 00:02:01,330
Uh-huh.
He always checks in with me.
54
00:02:01,455 --> 00:02:03,874
Yeah, yeah, yeah. He likes to have
me check in, but it's not like-
55
00:02:03,957 --> 00:02:06,251
Okay.
Enjoy that movie, boners.
56
00:02:06,335 --> 00:02:08,420
[ Exhales ]
57
00:02:08,503 --> 00:02:10,672
She doesn't know anything
about friendship, dude.
58
00:02:10,756 --> 00:02:12,758
No. How could she?
She doesn't have any friends.
59
00:02:12,841 --> 00:02:15,260
“Old married couple.”
That's what she called-
60
00:02:15,344 --> 00:02:17,095
[ Both Chuckling ]
61
00:02:58,178 --> 00:02:59,429
[ Door Opens ]
62
00:02:59,513 --> 00:03:02,265
- Hey-oh.
- Yo, where you been?
63
00:03:02,349 --> 00:03:04,893
What do you mean?
I was getting the movie.
64
00:03:04,976 --> 00:03:06,770
Yeah, but you weren't answering
any of my calls.
65
00:03:06,853 --> 00:03:09,231
I've been calling you...
sort of over and over again.
66
00:03:09,314 --> 00:03:11,441
I was having a conversation
with the video store clerk.
67
00:03:11,525 --> 00:03:14,903
Yeah, but I texted you 911,dude.
That means it's an emergency.
68
00:03:15,028 --> 00:03:16,947
Yeah, I saw that.
Yeah.
69
00:03:17,072 --> 00:03:19,658
Uh, what was the emergency, Mac? Well, I
couldn't get in touch with you, dude.
70
00:03:19,783 --> 00:03:21,993
I almost called the police.
The police?
71
00:03:22,077 --> 00:03:23,704
I mean, that's
a bit of an overreaction.
72
00:03:23,829 --> 00:03:27,541
I was gone for what, an hour? Yeah,
but I thought we had a deal.
73
00:03:27,624 --> 00:03:29,668
You know, you would check in
every once in a while,
74
00:03:29,751 --> 00:03:32,129
and then that way I would know
that you were okay.
75
00:03:32,212 --> 00:03:33,839
Okay. I- I'm okay.
76
00:03:33,922 --> 00:03:35,549
Uh, I'm sorry.
Can we watch the movie?
77
00:03:35,674 --> 00:03:37,592
Yeah. Great. Sure.
Yeah.
78
00:03:37,676 --> 00:03:40,178
The Transporter 2?
79
00:03:40,262 --> 00:03:42,305
Yeah, I-
Look, man. I-I-I-
80
00:03:42,389 --> 00:03:44,015
I know you wanted
to see Predator again,
81
00:03:44,099 --> 00:03:46,893
but I feel like we've seen that 30
times in the last two months...
82
00:03:46,977 --> 00:03:48,687
and thought maybe
we could mix things up.
83
00:03:48,770 --> 00:03:51,148
Video store clerk guy said
this movie's awesome, so-
84
00:03:51,231 --> 00:03:54,568
The video store... clerk guy.
I feel like you won't-
85
00:03:54,651 --> 00:03:56,319
[ Chuckles ]
stop talking about him.
86
00:03:56,445 --> 00:03:59,156
Huh. I asked him for a movie
recommendation, okay?
87
00:03:59,281 --> 00:04:01,867
Yeah. And you got one. it's
really not that big of a deal.
88
00:04:01,950 --> 00:04:05,704
Well, the big deal, Dennis, is that I wasn't
even consulted on the decision. Okay?
89
00:04:05,787 --> 00:04:08,248
And this is a big deal to me as well.
it's also my night.
90
00:04:08,331 --> 00:04:10,709
P I us, Transporter 2?
We haven't seen Transporter 7,
91
00:04:10,792 --> 00:04:12,461
which means
we'll be completely lost.
92
00:04:12,586 --> 00:04:14,504
I doubt it.
Plus Jason Statham's physique...
93
00:04:14,588 --> 00:04:16,256
is nothing like the lineup
in Predator.
94
00:04:16,339 --> 00:04:18,842
Okay, stop. I don't want
to have conversations anymore...
95
00:04:18,925 --> 00:04:20,552
about dudes' physiques,
and whether they can-
96
00:04:20,635 --> 00:04:22,471
Dennis, in body mass alone-
97
00:04:22,554 --> 00:04:24,973
That's what I was trying to avoid-
a conversation about body mass, okay?
98
00:04:25,056 --> 00:04:27,392
We've had that conversation
five times a day for the last month...
99
00:04:27,476 --> 00:04:30,020
because we keep watching Predator,
and all you talk about is Weathers...
100
00:04:30,103 --> 00:04:33,064
and-and-and Jesse “the Body” Ventura
and how many pounds they can pack on.
101
00:04:33,148 --> 00:04:36,276
It's important to pack on mass.
You're talking about carbo-loading.
102
00:04:36,359 --> 00:04:38,111
I don't want to have this
conversation with you anymore.
103
00:04:38,195 --> 00:04:41,198
No. You'd rather have conversations
with video store clerks.
104
00:04:41,281 --> 00:04:44,117
You know what, man? If you don't want to
watch the movie with me, that's fine.
105
00:04:44,201 --> 00:04:46,328
I will watch it by myself.
Goddamn it!
106
00:04:46,411 --> 00:04:48,997
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Where is this coming from?
107
00:04:51,041 --> 00:04:55,045
I have been thinking a lot about
what Dee said, and I do think-
108
00:04:55,128 --> 00:04:59,216
[ Exhales ] maybe we are spending a
little bit too much time together.
109
00:04:59,299 --> 00:05:01,384
Wh-What are you saying?
110
00:05:01,468 --> 00:05:05,472
I'm saying that I feel like we're
in a little bit of a rut, and...
111
00:05:06,515 --> 00:05:09,142
I feel like I'm not...
112
00:05:10,143 --> 00:05:12,229
flourishing.
113
00:05:12,312 --> 00:05:18,276
[ Clicks Tongue ] Well,
far be it from me to, uh,
114
00:05:18,360 --> 00:05:21,404
keep the flower of you
from flourishing, but, uh,
115
00:05:21,530 --> 00:05:24,366
I guess I'll grab my shit and
stay at Charlie's. Wait.
116
00:05:26,034 --> 00:05:27,702
Don't do that.
117
00:05:27,786 --> 00:05:31,665
[ Exhales ] I... feel like I'm the
one that got us into this mess.
118
00:05:31,790 --> 00:05:35,001
Okay. So you'll stay
at Charlie's then. No.
119
00:05:36,127 --> 00:05:38,255
You should stay there...
120
00:05:38,338 --> 00:05:39,965
because you already said
that you would.
121
00:05:40,048 --> 00:05:41,716
Also, I have more stuff.
122
00:05:41,800 --> 00:05:44,886
It'll take me longer to
pack, and it'll be easier.
123
00:05:44,970 --> 00:05:47,722
[ Doorbell Rings]
124
00:05:52,018 --> 00:05:54,938
Hi. I'm responding to a
missing persons report.
125
00:05:59,776 --> 00:06:01,945
I'll pack my things.
126
00:06:03,655 --> 00:06:07,242
- [Knocking]
- Hey!
127
00:06:07,325 --> 00:06:10,662
[ Laughing 1
Hey-oh!
128
00:06:10,745 --> 00:06:12,622
What's the matter with you?
What are you doing here?
129
00:06:12,706 --> 00:06:15,125
- I came to hang outwith you.
- I thought it was movie night.
130
00:06:15,208 --> 00:06:18,420
Yeah, it is movie night. But, uh, Mac and
I are taking a little bit of a break.
131
00:06:18,503 --> 00:06:20,005
I was thinking about
what you were saying.
132
00:06:20,088 --> 00:06:21,882
You were right. I wasn't
spending enough time by myself.
133
00:06:21,965 --> 00:06:24,342
I wasn't being an independent individual.
I wasn't flourishing.
134
00:06:24,426 --> 00:06:26,011
So let's watch the movie
together, you and me.
135
00:06:26,136 --> 00:06:28,847
[Meow/rig] I'm kind of in the middle
of something with my cat right now.
136
00:06:28,930 --> 00:06:32,809
Oh. Okay. Well, yeah. I like cats.
Let's bring him into the mix.
137
00:06:32,893 --> 00:06:36,938
Uh, can't do that.
He is... in the wall somewhere.
138
00:06:37,022 --> 00:06:39,608
- He's in the wall?
- Yeah. I think he got into the wall.
139
00:06:39,733 --> 00:06:41,318
Wow. Well, that's a bummer.
[ Meowing Continues]
140
00:06:41,401 --> 00:06:43,028
But I'm sure he'll come out
at some point.
141
00:06:43,111 --> 00:06:44,988
Got himself in there.
I'm sure he'll get himself out.
142
00:06:45,071 --> 00:06:48,325
Or he won't, and he'll die in there, and
you'll have a dead cat smell for a while.
143
00:06:48,408 --> 00:06:50,535
But listen, I'm gonna help you
out of that jam.
144
00:06:50,619 --> 00:06:53,455
Open the windows and get some
scented candles going,
145
00:06:53,538 --> 00:06:55,206
maybe get a big fan in here...
146
00:06:55,290 --> 00:06:58,460
and then he'll decompose
and everything will be fine.
147
00:06:58,543 --> 00:07:02,297
Boom! That's what it's like to have a
sidekick. Helped you out of a jam.
148
00:07:02,380 --> 00:07:04,382
[ Meowing Continues]
149
00:07:04,466 --> 00:07:06,885
In the meantime, let's watch the movie.
I want to- I want to-
150
00:07:06,968 --> 00:07:09,888
[ Exhales ] Just want to
watch a movie... with you.
151
00:07:09,971 --> 00:07:11,973
Could we do that?
152
00:07:15,477 --> 00:07:18,396
Why don't you just put your
trash into a trash can?
153
00:07:18,480 --> 00:07:22,192
I put it in the trash can when I'm
ready to take it outside, dude.
154
00:07:22,275 --> 00:07:24,903
Yeah, but you could skip a step
by first putting it into the can.
155
00:07:24,986 --> 00:07:26,696
And you can
shut the hell up, man.
156
00:07:26,780 --> 00:07:29,950
Okay. And Jesus Christ, Frank. Are you
cutting your toenails with a steak knife?
157
00:07:30,033 --> 00:07:31,576
I suppose you have a problem
with that too?
158
00:07:31,660 --> 00:07:36,081
Ah! Oh! Oh! Botched toe!
I botched that one.
159
00:07:36,164 --> 00:07:38,541
Oh, that's a botch job.
That's bleeding.
160
00:07:38,625 --> 00:07:40,543
I need some trash
to plug up the cut.
161
00:07:40,627 --> 00:07:42,462
Do not plug an open wound
with trash.
162
00:07:42,545 --> 00:07:45,298
- Well, it's bleeding like a sieve.
- Then use your sock, bro.
163
00:07:45,423 --> 00:07:47,258
Don't waste a good sock on
a tiny little cut. Sock.
164
00:07:47,384 --> 00:07:49,594
I'll find you a candy wrapper
if you give me a second. Oh.
165
00:07:49,678 --> 00:07:52,514
Oh. Oh, wait a minute.
166
00:07:52,597 --> 00:07:55,225
That's- That's working. Oh,
it's acting like a cut glove.
167
00:07:55,308 --> 00:07:57,769
Ah! Unbelievable, dude.
Waste of a sock.
168
00:07:57,852 --> 00:08:01,314
There are so many things that are gonna
need to change now that I'm living here.
169
00:08:01,398 --> 00:08:03,024
Are you hearing this shit, bro?
170
00:08:03,149 --> 00:08:04,985
Well, you know, he's got
some good ideas. What?
171
00:08:05,068 --> 00:08:08,321
- Maybe it wouldn't be bad if he moved in.
- Are you serious, dude?
172
00:08:08,446 --> 00:08:10,448
I could use a little structure
in my life here. No, man.
173
00:08:10,573 --> 00:08:12,909
Look at all the trash all over the place.
Oh, I love the trash.
174
00:08:13,034 --> 00:08:14,536
He's cleaning up the trash.
Mmm-
175
00:08:14,619 --> 00:08:16,162
[Phone Ringing ] I don't
want struc- [ Groans ]
176
00:08:16,246 --> 00:08:17,914
Uh- Eh-
Is that Dennis?
177
00:08:17,998 --> 00:08:20,375
I don't know who it is.
I haven't answered the phone.
178
00:08:20,500 --> 00:08:22,293
Are you gonna answer it though,
because- Okay. Unbelievable, dude.
179
00:08:22,377 --> 00:08:26,131
- I'm just gonna get it. Hello?
- Hey, buddy. How you doing?
180
00:08:26,256 --> 00:08:29,175
Oh, Mac is being annoying as shit.
That him?
181
00:08:29,259 --> 00:08:31,720
Oh, Mac's being annoying?
That's a big surprise.
182
00:08:31,845 --> 00:08:34,222
He bossing you around a whole bunch?
Totally bossing me around.
183
00:08:34,305 --> 00:08:38,393
Yeah. Typical. it's what he does.
it's what he does.
184
00:08:38,476 --> 00:08:40,937
- Did he mention me?
- No.
185
00:08:41,021 --> 00:08:44,399
No? Really? He didn't say
anything at all about me or-
186
00:08:44,482 --> 00:08:46,693
What is this, dude? Did you
call me just to talk about Mac?
187
00:08:46,818 --> 00:08:49,571
Okay, 'cause I don't want to talk about
Mac with you. Is he talking about me?
188
00:08:49,654 --> 00:08:53,033
- No, no, no, no. Tell him I'm not talking about
him at all. -I'm not telling him shit, dude.
189
00:08:53,158 --> 00:08:55,118
I'm gonna hang up the phone on you.
No, no, Charlie.
190
00:08:55,201 --> 00:08:58,163
Don't hang up the phone. I didn't call
to talk about Mac. I swear to God, dude.
191
00:08:58,246 --> 00:09:00,623
Please. Come on. I could care less
about that guy. Are you kidding me?
192
00:09:00,749 --> 00:09:03,918
Called to talk to you. Wanted to see if you
wanted to come over to Dee's apartment.
193
00:09:04,002 --> 00:09:05,795
- We're doing a movie night.
- Charlie, hang up the phone.
194
00:09:05,920 --> 00:09:07,964
Oh, my God, dude. I'll be right over.
Hang up the phone.
195
00:09:08,048 --> 00:09:10,008
Yes! Yeah! Yes!
196
00:09:10,091 --> 00:09:13,511
Yes. Yeah.
197
00:09:13,595 --> 00:09:15,597
Hey,Dee.
Charlie's coming over.
198
00:09:15,680 --> 00:09:17,474
I don't care.
199
00:09:17,557 --> 00:09:20,268
Ah, shit.
I don't care either.
200
00:09:23,730 --> 00:09:26,232
I am so excited to watch
this movie without Mac.
201
00:09:26,316 --> 00:09:29,819
He is so annoying. He's always constantly
critiquing the fight scenes...
202
00:09:29,903 --> 00:09:31,863
and talking about how he could
choreograph the fight scenes...
203
00:09:31,946 --> 00:09:33,698
so much better than they could,
which is ridiculous.
204
00:09:33,782 --> 00:09:36,701
- He doesn't know shit.
- Ooh! Dennis, I pinpointed him.
205
00:09:36,785 --> 00:09:38,953
Dee, will you forget the
goddamn cat for a second...
206
00:09:39,037 --> 00:09:41,081
and listen to all the interesting
things I have to say?
207
00:09:41,164 --> 00:09:42,874
You're being the worst
sidekick right now.
208
00:09:42,999 --> 00:09:44,709
No, you’re being the worst sidekick.
[Meowing]
209
00:09:44,793 --> 00:09:47,170
I thought sidekicks were supposed
to help each other out of jams.
210
00:09:47,253 --> 00:09:49,047
What? I did
help you out of the jam.
211
00:09:49,130 --> 00:09:51,216
I told you what to do with
your dead, stinking cat.
212
00:09:51,299 --> 00:09:53,051
No, no, no, no, no.
Come on.
213
00:09:53,134 --> 00:09:56,137
Oh! I lost him. I lost him, Dennis.
Thanks a lot.
214
00:09:56,221 --> 00:09:59,307
Oh, do me a favor.
Peel this apple for me, please?
215
00:09:59,390 --> 00:10:02,727
No! No, I'm not
gonna peel an apple for you.
216
00:10:02,811 --> 00:10:04,521
But Mac always does it for me.
217
00:10:04,604 --> 00:10:06,189
Why does Mac
peel your apples for you?
218
00:10:06,272 --> 00:10:09,067
He doesn't like for me to eat
the apples with the skin on it.
219
00:10:09,150 --> 00:10:10,610
He says the skin's
loaded with toxins.
220
00:10:10,693 --> 00:10:12,153
Okay. Well, good news.
Mac's not here.
221
00:10:12,237 --> 00:10:15,073
I know he's not here, and that's
why I need you to do it for me.
222
00:10:15,156 --> 00:10:17,867
- Please? Please? - Oh, Jesus.
Just eat it with the skin on it.
223
00:10:17,951 --> 00:10:21,079
I do not like it with the skin, Dee! I'm
not allowed to eat it with the skin!
224
00:10:21,162 --> 00:10:22,789
- I'm not allowed!
- Oh, my God!
225
00:10:22,872 --> 00:10:24,541
All right.
If you just shut up,
226
00:10:24,624 --> 00:10:27,418
I will peel the apple for you the
way that Mac likes you to eat it.
227
00:10:27,502 --> 00:10:29,295
Give it to me.
Give it to me!
228
00:10:29,379 --> 00:10:31,714
I'll do it the way
that Mac insists. Okay?
229
00:10:31,798 --> 00:10:33,800
Yeah.
230
00:10:35,135 --> 00:10:38,221
Hey-oh! Is that Charlie?
Charlie's in the house!
231
00:10:38,304 --> 00:10:43,351
Charlie's in the house!
Hey! Hey!
232
00:10:43,476 --> 00:10:45,228
Hey, you want a skinless
apple, bud? Yup.
233
00:10:45,311 --> 00:10:49,399
Two skinless apples, Dee. Let's fire
the movie up. it's movie night.
234
00:10:49,482 --> 00:10:51,901
- Here's your apple, dick.
- All right. Yeah.
235
00:10:52,026 --> 00:10:54,195
Where's mine?
Are you kidding me?
236
00:10:54,320 --> 00:10:56,823
Mmm. You can peel your
own apple, Charlie.
237
00:10:56,906 --> 00:11:01,035
Mmm. She's in a little bit of a mood
because her cat got stuck in the wall.
238
00:11:01,119 --> 00:11:05,790
Cat in the wall, eh? Okay.
Now you're talking my language.
239
00:11:05,874 --> 00:11:08,418
I know this game. All right.
Catch me up to speed here.
240
00:11:08,543 --> 00:11:10,962
What do we got? You're putting
Cheeto fingers all over the wall.
241
00:11:11,045 --> 00:11:13,423
All right. Let's focus, Dee.
What's the point of entry here?
242
00:11:13,506 --> 00:11:16,551
That's the thing, Charlie. I've been looking all
around this goddamn place. I can't find one.
243
00:11:16,634 --> 00:11:18,636
All right. I've seen this before.
You know what happened?
244
00:11:18,720 --> 00:11:22,098
I bet it flattened itself out, went
right through a seam in your wall.
245
00:11:22,182 --> 00:11:25,226
I don't think there's anything in the
laws of nature that would support that.
246
00:11:25,351 --> 00:11:27,437
Cats do not abide by the laws
of nature, all right? Hey.
247
00:11:27,562 --> 00:11:29,981
You don't know shit about ca- We're
still gonna watch the movie, right?
248
00:11:30,064 --> 00:11:32,066
Uh- Uh, yeah.
Yeah?
249
00:11:32,192 --> 00:11:34,777
I think it's stuck in there.
No! It is not stuck.
250
00:11:34,861 --> 00:11:37,655
All right. Let's focus on what's
happening with the cat, all right?
251
00:11:37,739 --> 00:11:39,699
It made a conscious decision
to go in your wall. Correct?
252
00:11:39,824 --> 00:11:41,910
Really?
Absolutely. Absolutely.
253
00:11:41,993 --> 00:11:44,579
It chose to be in there. It
wants to be in your wall, Dee.
254
00:11:44,704 --> 00:11:47,332
Thinking about getting some catnip, and
I was gonna put it- No, no, no, no.
255
00:11:47,415 --> 00:11:49,876
Don't do that. Don't do that. it's
gonna know that's a trap, Dee. Okay?
256
00:11:49,959 --> 00:11:52,545
That's gonna irritate the cat, then
it's gonna dig itself down further.
257
00:11:52,670 --> 00:11:54,339
We may never get to it.
Okay? You serious?
258
00:11:54,422 --> 00:11:56,007
Let's start thinking
like a cat here. All right?
259
00:11:56,090 --> 00:11:57,926
You know, we-
we need another cat.
260
00:11:58,051 --> 00:11:59,844
Yes? That's what we need.
Here's what we're gonna do.
261
00:11:59,928 --> 00:12:02,472
I'm gonna crack a little hole in
your wall- Tiny one. it'll be cool.
262
00:12:02,555 --> 00:12:05,600
And then I'm gonna slip a second cat
in with a string tied around it.
263
00:12:05,683 --> 00:12:07,977
Those two will become codependent,
then I'll rip the second cat out,
264
00:12:08,102 --> 00:12:10,897
and the first one hopefully- hopefully
will follow. Hey, hey. Hey, man.
265
00:12:10,980 --> 00:12:14,025
Hey. I'm sorry. I don't mean to keep bugging
you, but you didn't tell me what to do.
266
00:12:14,150 --> 00:12:16,778
I don't care. Do you want me to
start it now or wait? I'll wait.
267
00:12:16,903 --> 00:12:19,447
Yeah. Start it. But I want to
watch it with you. I will wait.
268
00:12:19,530 --> 00:12:21,658
Just start the movie, man, 'cause
I'm having a conversation here!
269
00:12:21,741 --> 00:12:23,326
- All day.
- [ Mouths Word ]
270
00:12:23,451 --> 00:12:26,412
All right. Where are we gonna get this
other cat? I can get you another cat.
271
00:12:26,496 --> 00:12:28,122
I got followed here
by, like, 10 cats.
272
00:12:28,248 --> 00:12:30,708
Yeah, they're starting to
follow me these days. Uh- I-
273
00:12:30,792 --> 00:12:32,794
You know, I don't want you
to miss the setup.
274
00:12:32,877 --> 00:12:35,088
[ Mouths Words]
275
00:12:35,171 --> 00:12:39,759
I got everything- all the groceries,
no cat food. [ Chuckles ]
276
00:12:39,842 --> 00:12:42,470
And I bumped into
that guy at the video store.
277
00:12:42,553 --> 00:12:45,807
- Beefcake?
- Total jerk-off.
278
00:12:45,890 --> 00:12:47,850
[ Exhales ]
Nice.
279
00:12:47,934 --> 00:12:51,479
- Hey! This place is tits!
- Yeah, right? Looks good.
280
00:12:51,604 --> 00:12:53,022
Huh? You did a great job.
Thank you.
281
00:12:53,147 --> 00:12:55,692
Whoa! Frank! No, no! Oh, God, dude!
What?
282
00:12:55,775 --> 00:12:58,152
The skin of those things
is riddled with toxins!
283
00:12:58,236 --> 00:13:00,613
[ Groans ]
Yeah, get it out though.
284
00:13:00,738 --> 00:13:02,991
Get it all out. Yuck!
[ Spitting ]
285
00:13:03,116 --> 00:13:05,576
Whoo! That was a close call.
Good save.
286
00:13:05,660 --> 00:13:07,328
Hey, all right.
Well, don't touch me with it.
287
00:13:07,412 --> 00:13:08,997
Hey, also-
I cleaned out this closet.
288
00:13:09,080 --> 00:13:11,457
I'm telling you, bro, we could
fit a mattress in there.
289
00:13:11,541 --> 00:13:13,918
You and Charlie don't have to
sleep next to each other anymore.
290
00:13:14,002 --> 00:13:18,006
Well, I-l kind of liked the other
arrangement though. That was pretty good.
291
00:13:18,131 --> 00:13:22,302
[ Chuckles ] Yeah. The other
arrangement was- was not' pretty good.
292
00:13:22,385 --> 00:13:24,762
It was, um-
293
00:13:24,846 --> 00:13:27,015
It was, uh- What- What's
the word I'm looking for?
294
00:13:27,098 --> 00:13:29,892
- Crazy.
- No, it's not- not crazy. it's like-
295
00:13:29,976 --> 00:13:33,062
- Wackadoo.
- No. Just... stop.
296
00:13:33,146 --> 00:13:34,689
Whoa! Wh-What-
What are you doing now, dude?
297
00:13:34,772 --> 00:13:36,941
What? I'm taking
the toxic skin off.
298
00:13:37,025 --> 00:13:39,068
Yeah, but you're cutting it
with your toe knife.
299
00:13:39,152 --> 00:13:41,070
- Who gives a shit?
- Frank, that is disgusting.
300
00:13:41,195 --> 00:13:43,573
What- What are you talking about?
I'm throwing it out.
301
00:13:43,656 --> 00:13:45,867
- Wait. You're throwing my toe knife out?
- The toe knife is gone.
302
00:13:45,950 --> 00:13:49,120
- Why would you do that? - Because
you were cutting your fruit with it!
303
00:13:49,203 --> 00:13:51,914
What the hell's going on here?
Look, Mac. I mean, look. I-
304
00:13:51,998 --> 00:13:55,293
I think the cleaning up and the throwing
the trash away is good, but the-
305
00:13:55,376 --> 00:13:57,795
you know, the sleeping
arrangements and the plastic...
306
00:13:57,879 --> 00:14:00,131
and throwing the toe knife
out the window, that's-
307
00:14:00,214 --> 00:14:02,717
I'm not gonna put on airs
just because I got company.
308
00:14:02,800 --> 00:14:07,305
- So you think not eating cat food
is putting on airs? - You betcha!
309
00:14:07,388 --> 00:14:10,600
Look, I gotta fake a walk.
My head is swimming.
310
00:14:10,725 --> 00:14:12,935
That's fine. Just make sure you,
you know, check in. Oh, my.
311
00:14:13,019 --> 00:14:15,521
'Cause I haven't heard from
Charlie, and it is getting late.
312
00:14:15,605 --> 00:14:17,315
- Yeah, right.
- Okay. Be safe.
313
00:14:17,398 --> 00:14:18,399
[ Door Closes ]
314
00:14:20,526 --> 00:14:24,989
[ Movie On TV, indistinct]
315
00:14:25,073 --> 00:14:28,659
Okay, Dee! This little lady
is a calico cat.
316
00:14:28,785 --> 00:14:30,370
All calico cats are female.
[Meowing]
317
00:14:30,495 --> 00:14:32,997
I'm gonna pop this little girl in
your wall here. [Growling, Hissing]
318
00:14:33,081 --> 00:14:36,417
She's gonna meet your little
fella, they're gonna bond...
319
00:14:36,501 --> 00:14:39,420
and then I'm gonna rip her out and
he's gonna come right afterwards.
320
00:14:39,545 --> 00:14:40,713
Are you sure?
Mm-hmm.
321
00:14:40,838 --> 00:14:41,798
[ Growling]
You hear that'?
322
00:14:41,881 --> 00:14:43,674
Uh, I hear a squabble.
323
00:14:43,800 --> 00:14:45,718
Mm-hmm. it's all part of the dance, okay?
[ Screech/mg, Hissing ]
324
00:14:45,802 --> 00:14:48,596
They do a little sq- Come on. Wait.
Hold on. They do a little-
325
00:14:48,679 --> 00:14:50,556
Uh-oh. [ Clicks Tongue] Crap.
326
00:14:50,681 --> 00:14:52,225
Thanks a lot, Charlie.
Mmm.
327
00:14:52,308 --> 00:14:54,227
Goddamn it. I knew
I should've gotten a bird.
328
00:14:54,352 --> 00:14:56,187
A bird? What are you gonna
do with a bird? Yeah!
329
00:14:56,270 --> 00:14:58,731
Hey, guys!
I swallowed apple seeds!
330
00:14:58,815 --> 00:15:00,400
So what?
Are they poisonous?
331
00:15:00,483 --> 00:15:02,110
Are you kidding me, dude?
They're extremely poisonous!
332
00:15:02,235 --> 00:15:04,821
They're absolutely not poisonous!
Should I make myself throw up?
333
00:15:04,946 --> 00:15:07,782
I would throw up now!
Oh, goddamn it!
334
00:15:07,907 --> 00:15:10,159
Apple seeds, man? That's no good.
Are you kidding me?
335
00:15:10,284 --> 00:15:11,911
Apple seeds- Yo! Hey.
336
00:15:12,036 --> 00:15:14,497
Oh, hi. Come on in. [ Exhales]
337
00:15:14,580 --> 00:15:17,125
So, uh, how's life with Mac?
338
00:15:17,208 --> 00:15:18,793
I'm off him.
He's too pushy.
339
00:15:18,876 --> 00:15:20,837
Yeah, no shit.
You back on my team?
340
00:15:20,920 --> 00:15:23,089
If there's room for me.
341
00:15:23,172 --> 00:15:25,341
There is always room
for you, bud. Give it to me.
342
00:15:25,425 --> 00:15:29,720
[ Both Grunting, Laughing]
343
00:15:29,804 --> 00:15:31,305
[ Dennis] Hey, guys!
I can't throw up.
344
00:15:31,389 --> 00:15:33,808
Should I stick a finger down my throat?
Yes! Oh, my God.
345
00:15:33,933 --> 00:15:35,435
You guys, we gotta-
[ Retching ]
346
00:15:35,518 --> 00:15:37,645
Oh, man. We gotta get Mac and
Dennis back together, okay?
347
00:15:37,728 --> 00:15:39,147
Because they are ruining
all of our lives.
348
00:15:39,272 --> 00:15:40,982
What's the situation?
[ Retching Continues]
349
00:15:41,065 --> 00:15:43,734
I got two cats stuck inside this wall.
Can't get 'em out.
350
00:15:43,860 --> 00:15:45,778
You want to bring in a third?
I'm thinking maybe four.
351
00:15:45,862 --> 00:15:48,489
- What? No! No! No! No more cats!
- A deep hole-
352
00:15:48,614 --> 00:15:51,033
Frank, get out of here! You're making
it worse! Whoa. Back off Frank.
353
00:15:51,159 --> 00:15:52,952
We work very well together, okay?
We're the gruesome twosome!
354
00:15:53,035 --> 00:15:54,537
Gruesome twosome!
355
00:15:54,620 --> 00:15:58,124
[Braying, Grunting]
356
00:16:00,626 --> 00:16:03,421
All right! Okay! I am gonna go and
get Mac and Dennis back together.
357
00:16:03,504 --> 00:16:05,965
I'm gonna get a bird, I'm gonna
get two cats out of my wall...
358
00:16:06,048 --> 00:16:07,675
and then I'm gonna
go back to being alone.
359
00:16:07,758 --> 00:16:09,469
Excuse me.
Can you part for one second?
360
00:16:09,594 --> 00:16:11,137
Sure.
Thank you. Thank you.
361
00:16:11,220 --> 00:16:12,930
[ Retching Continues]
362
00:16:13,055 --> 00:16:14,557
What?
He swallowed some apple seeds.
363
00:16:28,112 --> 00:16:29,739
Sit down.
What-
364
00:16:29,822 --> 00:16:32,325
- What-
- S“.
365
00:16:32,408 --> 00:16:34,327
What is he doing here?
366
00:16:34,410 --> 00:16:37,288
I was told I would be meeting
a woman with giant breasts.
367
00:16:37,371 --> 00:16:41,042
I was also told that I was to
meet a woman with giant breasts.
368
00:16:41,125 --> 00:16:42,627
Yes, geniuses. I set you up.
369
00:16:42,710 --> 00:16:44,837
Now, can you please make up, because
you're driving everyone crazy.
370
00:16:44,921 --> 00:16:47,757
Look, I'm sorry that
I called you codependent, okay?
371
00:16:47,840 --> 00:16:49,425
I think you have
a great friendship,
372
00:16:49,509 --> 00:16:52,553
and it's perfectly natural for two grown
men to need each other this badly.
373
00:16:52,637 --> 00:16:54,222
So make up, please.
374
00:16:54,305 --> 00:16:57,141
[ Sighs ]
I guess I should-
375
00:16:57,266 --> 00:17:00,311
[Grunts]
[Grunts]
376
00:17:00,436 --> 00:17:03,606
You son of a bitch!
Okay. All right. Okay.
377
00:17:03,689 --> 00:17:06,400
Oh, my God.
You know what? Fine.
378
00:17:06,484 --> 00:17:08,194
I don't care anymore.
Guess what?
379
00:17:08,277 --> 00:17:10,988
Neither one of you are ever going
into my apartment ever again, okay?
380
00:17:11,072 --> 00:17:13,449
So make up, don't make up,
kill each other- I don't care.
381
00:17:13,533 --> 00:17:15,368
I need to go get a bird.
382
00:17:17,828 --> 00:17:19,956
She looks like a bird.
383
00:17:20,039 --> 00:17:21,958
[ Chuckles ]
384
00:17:26,712 --> 00:17:28,589
I swallowed
some apple seeds today.
385
00:17:28,673 --> 00:17:30,841
Did you make yourself throw up?
386
00:17:30,925 --> 00:17:33,469
I tried, but I couldn't.
387
00:17:33,553 --> 00:17:39,267
Smoke some cigarettes. The smoke will
suffocate the bacteria in your stomach.
388
00:17:41,018 --> 00:17:43,521
Okay. Thanks.
389
00:17:43,604 --> 00:17:45,523
How was Charlie's?
390
00:17:45,606 --> 00:17:47,191
[ Groans ]
391
00:17:47,275 --> 00:17:49,610
The way they live,
bro, it's-
392
00:17:49,735 --> 00:17:53,030
it's like, um- it's
like- Preposterous.
393
00:17:53,155 --> 00:17:54,782
Yeah, dude! Preposterous! Yeah.
394
00:17:54,907 --> 00:17:57,618
I've been trying to come up
with that all day! Yeah.
395
00:17:57,702 --> 00:18:00,913
God, dude! This is why you and I
are such a good team. You know?
396
00:18:00,997 --> 00:18:04,292
Like, I'm a man of action, and you're
a man that comes up with good-
397
00:18:04,417 --> 00:18:06,335
Words?
Words, dude!
398
00:18:06,419 --> 00:18:08,254
Okay. Yeah.
Great.
399
00:18:08,337 --> 00:18:09,880
You really gotta work
on your vocabulary though, man.
400
00:18:10,006 --> 00:18:12,300
Well, you could help me. You
couldn't think of the word “words.”
401
00:18:12,383 --> 00:18:13,718
Is everything okay
here, gentlemen?
402
00:18:13,801 --> 00:18:16,971
Uh, yeah. Everything's fine.
Uh, not that it concerns you.
403
00:18:17,054 --> 00:18:20,349
Now might be a good time for you
to pay your bill and leave.
404
00:18:20,433 --> 00:18:22,643
Well, you're not making sense
'cause we didn't buy anything.
405
00:18:22,768 --> 00:18:24,353
Actually, I-
Oh.
406
00:18:24,437 --> 00:18:27,565
- I had a couple of rum and Cokes.
- You had six, actually.
407
00:18:27,690 --> 00:18:29,358
Six?
I had six of 'em.
408
00:18:29,483 --> 00:18:31,986
Did you? Yeah. I was nervous
about the big-breasted lady.
409
00:18:32,111 --> 00:18:34,155
L- I was nervous about her too.
You got nervous too?
410
00:18:34,280 --> 00:18:36,282
A beautiful woman. Dee said she
had giant boobs, you know?
411
00:18:36,365 --> 00:18:37,408
I'm really excited
about it.
412
00:18:37,491 --> 00:18:39,160
[ Clears Throat]
Will that be cash or charge?
413
00:18:39,243 --> 00:18:43,748
I also was assuming that the big-breasted
lady was gonna pay for the drinks,
414
00:18:43,831 --> 00:18:45,541
so I don't have any money.
415
00:18:45,625 --> 00:18:50,046
I've got some cash. I can- I
can get you out of this jam.
416
00:19:05,519 --> 00:19:06,979
[Bird Chirping]
417
00:19:07,063 --> 00:19:09,565
[All Meowing ]
418
00:19:10,983 --> 00:19:12,485
Watch your eyes.
What?
419
00:19:12,568 --> 00:19:14,904
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
What the hell is going on?
420
00:19:14,987 --> 00:19:16,489
The gruesome twosome
in effect!
421
00:19:16,572 --> 00:19:19,450
[Grunting, Braying]
422
00:19:19,533 --> 00:19:21,202
Yeah. We're bashing
a bigger hole in your wall.
423
00:19:21,285 --> 00:19:23,913
- We're gonna stuff all the cats in
at one time. - Yeah, I see that.
424
00:19:23,996 --> 00:19:27,041
No more big holes in my wall, no more cats.
We're doing the bird thing.
425
00:19:27,124 --> 00:19:30,711
I got one. I tied a string around his
teeny, tiny little legs. I'm sending it in.
426
00:19:30,836 --> 00:19:33,130
You're gonna toss a bird in? I'm
gonna toss the bird in, Charlie.
427
00:19:33,214 --> 00:19:35,257
- Go ahead, Dee. Toss the bird in.
- Check this out. Watch this.
428
00:19:35,383 --> 00:19:36,801
[ Frank] Dinner time.
Go on, guy.
429
00:19:36,926 --> 00:19:38,386
Do your thing. [
Charlie ] All right.
430
00:19:38,511 --> 00:19:39,929
[Meowing]
Go on. You got it.
431
00:19:40,054 --> 00:19:41,764
[ Screeching ] Whoa! Hold on.
Hold on. Hold on, guy.
432
00:19:41,847 --> 00:19:44,308
I got you. Wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait, wait!
433
00:19:44,433 --> 00:19:46,435
Come on.
[ Meowing ]
434
00:19:46,519 --> 00:19:49,021
[ Charlie Laughs]
Well, congratulations, Dee.
435
00:19:49,105 --> 00:19:51,357
You have some very satisfied
cats in there, okay?
436
00:19:51,440 --> 00:19:53,818
Now will you step aside
and let the men do the work?
437
00:19:53,901 --> 00:19:57,321
Shut up! Shut up, okay? I got it from here,
all right? I'm bashing a hole in my wall.
438
00:19:57,405 --> 00:19:59,615
I'm going in myself. Give me this.
Get out of the way.
439
00:19:59,740 --> 00:20:01,784
All right. I'm not kidding.
Get the hell out of the way.
440
00:20:01,909 --> 00:20:03,786
Oh. I'm dead serious. I'm going in.
I've had enough.
441
00:20:03,869 --> 00:20:05,788
Go for it.
Bash away. Bash away.
442
00:20:05,913 --> 00:20:09,667
[ Shouting ] [Frank] Whoa! Oh!
443
00:20:09,750 --> 00:20:12,420
- I'm gonna get you, you jerk!
- Yeah! Yeah, Deandra!
444
00:20:12,503 --> 00:20:15,840
[ Panting ]
Come on, kitty.
445
00:20:15,965 --> 00:20:18,342
[ Meowing ]
Oh. Come on.
446
00:20:18,426 --> 00:20:21,637
Okay. I'll get you.
I'll get you.
447
00:20:21,721 --> 00:20:23,347
Wait- Oh.
448
00:20:23,431 --> 00:20:25,224
Wow! There are
a lot of cats back here!
449
00:20:25,349 --> 00:20:27,476
Yeah. We put a lot of cats in there.
[ Cell Phone Rings ]
450
00:20:27,601 --> 00:20:29,937
Oh, I'm getting a text.
Ooh. Who is it?
451
00:20:30,062 --> 00:20:32,648
Ah, the dynamic duo in effect.
Oh, they're back together!
452
00:20:32,773 --> 00:20:34,275
[ Chuckles ] Yeah. All right.
453
00:20:34,358 --> 00:20:35,860
They're watching Predator.
You want to join?
454
00:20:35,943 --> 00:20:37,361
Absolutely, dude.
Great.
455
00:20:37,486 --> 00:20:38,946
Deandra, we're out of here.
Yeah.
456
00:20:39,071 --> 00:20:40,614
Hey, you guys?
We're going.
457
00:20:40,740 --> 00:20:42,825
Yeah'? You guys, I think
I'm stuck in the wall.
458
00:20:42,950 --> 00:20:45,411
That's why she needs a friend.
You gotta have a sidekick.
459
00:20:45,494 --> 00:20:47,329
That's all I'm saying.
That's all I'm saying.
460
00:20:47,413 --> 00:20:50,166
All right- Oops. Okay, I'm trying to back
out, but my shirt's caught on something.
461
00:20:50,291 --> 00:20:52,501
[ Cats Screeching, Hissing]
Guys?
462
00:20:52,585 --> 00:20:55,087
Guys?
Guys, come on!
463
00:21:31,165 --> 00:21:34,126
[ Voices Speaking Backwards]
464
00:21:38,964 --> 00:21:39,965
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