1
00:00:07,354 --> 00:00:09,356
♪
2
00:00:09,356 --> 00:00:12,925
[Chet] In other news, Tinseltown
is coming to Philadelphia.
3
00:00:12,925 --> 00:00:16,189
Hollywood stars Bryan Cranston
and Aaron Paul are here
4
00:00:16,189 --> 00:00:18,452
promoting their alcohol brand,
Dos Hombres.
5
00:00:18,452 --> 00:00:21,847
[reporter]
Hey, Bryan, how does it feel
to be the kingpin of mezcal?
6
00:00:21,847 --> 00:00:24,371
Oh, no, no. No, no.
Don't-don't put that on me.
7
00:00:24,371 --> 00:00:25,764
No, I'm just a simple actor.
8
00:00:25,764 --> 00:00:27,505
This, this is the man,
9
00:00:27,505 --> 00:00:28,680
- the brains behind
the whole operation.
- No.
10
00:00:28,680 --> 00:00:30,073
- No, no, no.
- Yeah, it is.
11
00:00:30,073 --> 00:00:31,813
[Aaron]
It's a team effort.
12
00:00:31,813 --> 00:00:34,642
Wow. Hollywood celebrities
right here in Philly, huh?
13
00:00:34,642 --> 00:00:35,904
- I don't love it. I mean,
- Yeah.
14
00:00:35,904 --> 00:00:37,080
why can't
they stay in their lane?
15
00:00:37,080 --> 00:00:38,559
Why do they have
into come into our lane?
16
00:00:38,559 --> 00:00:40,213
The celebrity booze thing's
a little out of control.
17
00:00:40,213 --> 00:00:42,911
It's a total sellout.
I mean, a complete cash grab.
18
00:00:42,911 --> 00:00:44,870
Any idiot could take
a bottle of booze,
19
00:00:44,870 --> 00:00:48,091
slap a celebrity's face on it
and-and make a fortune.
20
00:00:48,091 --> 00:00:49,701
- I mean, we could do it
if we wanted.
- Oh, we know more about booze
21
00:00:49,701 --> 00:00:51,094
- than these two guys, probably.
- Are you kidding me?
22
00:00:51,094 --> 00:00:52,399
Look, yeah,
is there an opportunity
23
00:00:52,399 --> 00:00:53,879
for us to create a booze
of our own, right?
24
00:00:53,879 --> 00:00:56,055
And go pitch those guys?
Yeah, of course there is.
25
00:00:56,055 --> 00:00:58,405
- It would be so easy.
- Yeah.
- It would be so easy, you know?
26
00:00:58,405 --> 00:00:59,580
And could we do
something like that?
27
00:00:59,580 --> 00:01:00,886
- Also, yes. Absolutely.
- Yes. Yes.
28
00:01:00,886 --> 00:01:02,192
- Of course, we could, you know.
- But I mean,
29
00:01:02,192 --> 00:01:04,194
are we gonna go do something
like that?
30
00:01:04,194 --> 00:01:05,717
- Yes, we're gonna do that, yeah.
- Of course we are, yes.
- I think we should.
31
00:01:05,717 --> 00:01:07,501
- I think we should.
- It's already happening.
32
00:01:07,501 --> 00:01:09,112
♪
33
00:01:29,001 --> 00:01:30,524
[Dennis] Okay, guys,
34
00:01:30,524 --> 00:01:31,873
I think we can all agree
we need to come up with a brand
35
00:01:31,873 --> 00:01:34,354
that is representative
of who we are as people
36
00:01:34,354 --> 00:01:35,616
and as businessmen.
37
00:01:35,616 --> 00:01:38,489
Now I ask you guys this:
what's the first word
38
00:01:38,489 --> 00:01:41,448
that comes to your mind when
you are trying to describe us?
39
00:01:41,448 --> 00:01:43,450
- Premium.
- Mm, I was gonna say that, dude.
- Premium.
40
00:01:43,450 --> 00:01:44,973
- I was gonna say premium.
- You were gonna say that, too?
41
00:01:44,973 --> 00:01:46,192
- [Mac] Yeah.
- And look, hey.
42
00:01:46,192 --> 00:01:48,194
Listen, man, you're spot-on.
Premium.
43
00:01:48,194 --> 00:01:51,328
Yes, our brand will, of course,
be a premium brand.
44
00:01:51,328 --> 00:01:53,982
Now, what is the most premium
alcohol ever invented?
45
00:01:53,982 --> 00:01:54,983
- Goldschlaäger.
- Goldschlaäger. Yeah.
46
00:01:54,983 --> 00:01:56,724
Goldschlaäger. All right, hey!
47
00:01:56,724 --> 00:01:58,422
We're all on the same page here.
48
00:01:58,422 --> 00:02:00,032
- Yeah, we think...
- This is good, I like this.
Okay, yeah.
49
00:02:00,032 --> 00:02:02,034
Swiss cinnamon schnapps liqueur
50
00:02:02,034 --> 00:02:03,818
with drinkable flakes of gold
floating in it.
51
00:02:03,818 --> 00:02:05,820
My God, what's more premium
than that?
52
00:02:05,820 --> 00:02:07,996
- Yeah, nothing.
- Nothing, right?
53
00:02:07,996 --> 00:02:09,737
Here's a pitch. Okay,
I can get a bunch of nickels
54
00:02:09,737 --> 00:02:12,000
and I could smash them up
and put them into a 'schlaäger.
55
00:02:12,000 --> 00:02:13,480
Right? We call it Nickelschlaäger,
56
00:02:13,480 --> 00:02:15,917
and we pitch it as, like,
the working man's spirit.
57
00:02:15,917 --> 00:02:17,484
And, you know, nickels are,
they're easy to find
58
00:02:17,484 --> 00:02:19,182
and, uh, just as shiny.
59
00:02:19,182 --> 00:02:21,227
Well, that sounds disgusting,
and, uh,
60
00:02:21,227 --> 00:02:23,577
- potentially dangerous as well.
- Yeah, I'm-a try it, though.
61
00:02:23,577 --> 00:02:25,492
Listen, I think I've pinpointed
a small market trend
62
00:02:25,492 --> 00:02:27,015
that we could corner
but that could
63
00:02:27,015 --> 00:02:29,670
also totally represent us.
64
00:02:29,670 --> 00:02:31,324
I'm talking about a blend.
65
00:02:31,324 --> 00:02:33,108
A blend?
66
00:02:33,108 --> 00:02:34,849
- Oh. Blends.
- Yes. Blends, blends.
67
00:02:34,849 --> 00:02:36,024
- Blends!
- Yes.
68
00:02:36,024 --> 00:02:37,722
Blends are very popular
these days.
69
00:02:37,722 --> 00:02:39,332
Wine blends, whiskey blends,
you know?
70
00:02:39,332 --> 00:02:40,942
So let me ask you this:
71
00:02:40,942 --> 00:02:43,684
what is the second-classiest
drink in the world?
72
00:02:43,684 --> 00:02:45,208
- Jaägermeister. Yes.
- Jaägermeister. Yeah, yeah.
- Jaägermeister.
73
00:02:45,208 --> 00:02:46,774
- Jaägermeister, yeah.
- Amazing, yes.
74
00:02:46,774 --> 00:02:48,341
It's the 'meisters and the,
75
00:02:48,341 --> 00:02:50,038
and the 'schlaägers
and the schnapps.
76
00:02:50,038 --> 00:02:52,171
I mean, those are the drinks
that make people feel high-end,
77
00:02:52,171 --> 00:02:54,217
you know, like they're on
a European ski adventure, right?
78
00:02:54,217 --> 00:02:55,696
- [all laugh]
- Yeah, it's true.
- Yeah.
79
00:02:55,696 --> 00:02:58,264
Those drinks that make people
feel premium, you know?
80
00:02:58,264 --> 00:03:02,225
So I say we do a blend
of all the most premium drinks.
81
00:03:02,225 --> 00:03:04,357
We put them all together,
and we make one drink
82
00:03:04,357 --> 00:03:07,491
called Paddy's
SchlaägerSchnappsterMeister.
83
00:03:09,536 --> 00:03:11,321
- That's brilliant.
- That's so smart.
84
00:03:11,321 --> 00:03:13,061
- Well, because it-it blends them
- Dude, that is really smart.
It's fun.
85
00:03:13,061 --> 00:03:14,367
- all together, like you said.
- Who's thought of that?
86
00:03:14,367 --> 00:03:16,021
- It's a lot of fun, right?
- It's elegant.
87
00:03:16,021 --> 00:03:18,153
It definitely feels like you're
in Switzerland or something.
88
00:03:18,153 --> 00:03:19,851
- Yeah, yeah.
- Great, so you guys get it,
okay. Great.
89
00:03:19,851 --> 00:03:21,679
So I-I'm so glad we're on
the same page with this.
90
00:03:21,679 --> 00:03:23,420
So, here's the thing.
All we got to do
91
00:03:23,420 --> 00:03:25,552
is get those celebrity guys'
blessing and boom...
92
00:03:25,552 --> 00:03:28,338
we are off to the races,
we're gonna be rich men, but
93
00:03:28,338 --> 00:03:29,904
I don't think
we should approach them
94
00:03:29,904 --> 00:03:31,297
without being
fully funded first.
95
00:03:31,297 --> 00:03:33,517
So our first test
is gonna be landing a big fish
96
00:03:33,517 --> 00:03:35,083
who can finance
this whole operation.
97
00:03:35,083 --> 00:03:38,739
and I know just the guy.
98
00:03:38,739 --> 00:03:40,393
[chuckles]
99
00:03:40,393 --> 00:03:41,916
- [phone vibrating]
-♪ I want money ♪
100
00:03:41,916 --> 00:03:43,744
♪ Lots and lots. ♪
101
00:03:43,744 --> 00:03:45,659
- Yo.
- [Dennis] Yo, Frank,
102
00:03:45,659 --> 00:03:47,270
I got you on speakerphone
with, uh, Mac and Charlie.
103
00:03:47,270 --> 00:03:49,924
- Where are you right now?
- I'm in the sky.
104
00:03:49,924 --> 00:03:51,099
- In the sky?
- What?
105
00:03:51,099 --> 00:03:52,405
[Dee]
That's right, dicknips.
106
00:03:52,405 --> 00:03:54,277
We're in the sky
on a private plane
107
00:03:54,277 --> 00:03:56,104
- on the way to Aruba.
- [Charlie] What the hell, Frank?
108
00:03:56,104 --> 00:03:57,628
- Why you taking Dee?
- [Dee] Um, because
109
00:03:57,628 --> 00:03:58,933
I'm more glamorous
than you guys.
110
00:03:58,933 --> 00:04:00,892
Frank recognizes that
and so he invited me.
111
00:04:00,892 --> 00:04:03,416
I was on my way to the jet,
112
00:04:03,416 --> 00:04:05,897
she overheard me talking
about the flight
113
00:04:05,897 --> 00:04:08,769
- and she glommed on.
- Yeah, you know what?
We don't care.
114
00:04:08,769 --> 00:04:10,945
Uh, Frank, we have a business
proposition for you, pal.
115
00:04:10,945 --> 00:04:12,164
Frank, how would you like
to invest
116
00:04:12,164 --> 00:04:14,732
in a celebrity alcohol brand?
117
00:04:14,732 --> 00:04:16,995
No, I don't know about that.
118
00:04:16,995 --> 00:04:19,345
I-I once had Greg Louganis
119
00:04:19,345 --> 00:04:23,131
as the face of my apricot brand
in the '80s.
120
00:04:23,131 --> 00:04:25,438
But when he cracked his noggin
at the Olympics,
121
00:04:25,438 --> 00:04:27,614
the business took a nosedive
with him.
122
00:04:27,614 --> 00:04:28,833
Okay, well, we're talking about
123
00:04:28,833 --> 00:04:30,313
a much bigger celebrity
than that, okay?
124
00:04:30,313 --> 00:04:32,315
We're talking about
a household name here.
125
00:04:32,315 --> 00:04:34,360
Have you ever hear
of a little show called
126
00:04:34,360 --> 00:04:36,971
Malcolm in the Middle?
127
00:04:36,971 --> 00:04:39,409
Have I?
Changed the game.
128
00:04:39,409 --> 00:04:41,454
- Changed the game, Frank.
- That it did. That it did.
- [Mac] Yes. Yes.
129
00:04:41,454 --> 00:04:43,804
- It did change the game.
- That it did. One of
the greatest shows of all time.
130
00:04:43,804 --> 00:04:45,632
Well, listen, the dad
from that show is in town
131
00:04:45,632 --> 00:04:47,460
and we're gonna be
pitching him tonight.
132
00:04:47,460 --> 00:04:49,462
And Malcolm. He's here, too,
although he's all grown up now,
133
00:04:49,462 --> 00:04:50,855
- so you might not recognize him.
- Yeah.
134
00:04:50,855 --> 00:04:52,552
Dang, that sounds
pretty glamorous.
135
00:04:52,552 --> 00:04:55,163
- I'd like to hang with celebs.
- Shut up, Dee.
136
00:04:55,163 --> 00:04:56,904
- [Dennis] Shut up, Dee.
- [Charlie] Oh, God,
shut up, Dee.
137
00:04:56,904 --> 00:04:59,124
[Mac]
Shut your mouth
or I will shut it for you!
138
00:04:59,124 --> 00:05:01,344
When you get back,
Mac's gonna shut it for you!
139
00:05:01,344 --> 00:05:03,389
We're gonna shut your mouth and
we're gonna sew your lips shut!
140
00:05:03,389 --> 00:05:04,608
- [Charlie] Just shut up.
- Shut up!
141
00:05:04,608 --> 00:05:06,479
- Shut up!
- All right, well-well,
142
00:05:06,479 --> 00:05:09,395
you know, if you can get,
uh, Malcolm and his dad
143
00:05:09,395 --> 00:05:11,441
on the hook,
bring them to me at the jet.
144
00:05:11,441 --> 00:05:13,094
When I land, we'll talk shop.
145
00:05:13,094 --> 00:05:14,182
- [Mac] Oh, good.
- [Charlie] Nice, dude.
146
00:05:14,182 --> 00:05:16,489
- Big fish landed!
- All right!
147
00:05:16,489 --> 00:05:18,535
How are they gonna
bring them to Aruba?
148
00:05:18,535 --> 00:05:21,625
We were never going to Aruba.
We're circling Philly.
149
00:05:22,669 --> 00:05:25,629
Oh, my God.
There's The Linc!
150
00:05:25,629 --> 00:05:27,848
What the hell, Frank?
Why are we circling Philly?
151
00:05:27,848 --> 00:05:30,068
I got to put enough miles
on the jet
152
00:05:30,068 --> 00:05:32,679
to make it look like
I went to Aruba and back.
153
00:05:32,679 --> 00:05:34,159
It's a tax thing.
154
00:05:34,159 --> 00:05:36,030
Then why don't we just
go to Aruba and back?
155
00:05:36,030 --> 00:05:37,728
Wouldn't that make more sense?
156
00:05:37,728 --> 00:05:39,686
I have things to do in Philly.
157
00:05:39,686 --> 00:05:41,688
But I don't want
to circle Philly for hours.
158
00:05:41,688 --> 00:05:43,429
Hey, look, first you nag me
to get on the plane,
159
00:05:43,429 --> 00:05:45,170
now you're nagging me
to get off.
160
00:05:45,170 --> 00:05:46,476
Just... No dice.
161
00:05:46,476 --> 00:05:49,087
- We're circling Philly.
- Oh, goddamn it.
162
00:05:49,783 --> 00:05:52,177
♪ I want money,
lots and lots of money...♪
163
00:05:52,177 --> 00:05:54,397
It is popping off in there, man.
It is popping off.
164
00:05:54,397 --> 00:05:56,399
Actually, Charlie,
I would also love for you
165
00:05:56,399 --> 00:05:58,531
- to pop off that hat.
- No, dude, you said dress nice.
166
00:05:58,531 --> 00:06:00,228
I want to be able to tip
my cap to these guys
167
00:06:00,228 --> 00:06:02,230
- when I meet them.
- Yeah, but you look like
a limo driver.
168
00:06:02,230 --> 00:06:04,537
- Whatever, dude.
I look good, man.
- [sighs]
169
00:06:04,537 --> 00:06:06,626
You guys want to hit
some of this, too, by the way?
170
00:06:06,626 --> 00:06:08,889
- The hell is that?
- It's Nickelschlaäger, man.
171
00:06:08,889 --> 00:06:10,630
It's delicious.
I've been drinking it all day.
172
00:06:10,630 --> 00:06:12,458
Throw that shit out. Do not
bring that up in the pitch.
173
00:06:12,458 --> 00:06:14,417
- I'm gonna pitch it.
- Dude, do not... Don't...
174
00:06:14,417 --> 00:06:15,896
Oh, goddamn it.
175
00:06:15,896 --> 00:06:18,333
- [scanner beeps]
- Oh.
176
00:06:18,333 --> 00:06:20,553
- Over here, sir.
- Okay, you know what?
That might have been this.
177
00:06:20,553 --> 00:06:23,556
Uh, here, I'll give it to you,
I guess. Uh, don't mind me.
178
00:06:23,556 --> 00:06:25,732
- Anything in your pockets, sir?
- No, no, I'm good.
179
00:06:25,732 --> 00:06:27,865
- I'm good, I sh...
- [device beeping]
180
00:06:29,606 --> 00:06:31,956
Uh...
181
00:06:31,956 --> 00:06:33,740
Guys, why is it going off
on my stomach?
182
00:06:33,740 --> 00:06:35,742
Because you have
a belly full of nickels.
183
00:06:35,742 --> 00:06:37,918
Oh, right. Shit.
Okay, you know what? Um...
184
00:06:37,918 --> 00:06:39,442
I'll make myself throw up
and then I'll get...
185
00:06:39,442 --> 00:06:41,574
Should I throw up here or, uh...
186
00:06:41,574 --> 00:06:42,923
All right, I'm gonna go outside
187
00:06:42,923 --> 00:06:44,272
and-and I'll meet you guys
back in.
188
00:06:44,272 --> 00:06:45,883
- [scanner beeps]
- Great.
189
00:06:45,883 --> 00:06:47,754
Good riddance.
He looks ridiculous anyway.
190
00:06:47,754 --> 00:06:49,277
Yeah, well, you don't look
that much better, pal.
191
00:06:49,277 --> 00:06:51,323
I mean, what-what,
what is going on with that suit?
192
00:06:51,323 --> 00:06:54,500
Oh, I'm going for
a "Jordan in the '90s" look.
193
00:06:54,500 --> 00:06:57,416
I mean, who's more premium
than MJ, right?
194
00:06:57,416 --> 00:06:59,505
Now, I'm thinking
that I go pitch a fashion line
195
00:06:59,505 --> 00:07:01,028
and sort of expand
196
00:07:01,028 --> 00:07:02,856
- into a lifestyle brand.
- No, don't do that.
197
00:07:02,856 --> 00:07:05,206
Okay? Let's just... Uh, can we
stick with the one thing?
198
00:07:05,206 --> 00:07:07,426
- Just stick with
the one thing, please.
- They're celebrities.
199
00:07:07,426 --> 00:07:09,428
- They're gonna get the look.
- I know they're celebrities.
200
00:07:09,428 --> 00:07:10,603
I'm not saying they're not
celebrities. I'm saying...
201
00:07:10,603 --> 00:07:11,735
Do you know
who Michael Jordan is?
202
00:07:11,735 --> 00:07:13,519
- Yes, I know who...
- Then why are you
203
00:07:13,519 --> 00:07:14,781
- fighting me about this?
- Can we just go get in
the meet-and-greet line?
204
00:07:14,781 --> 00:07:16,827
It's already getting
long as shit. Come on.
205
00:07:18,916 --> 00:07:20,352
[Frank cackles]
206
00:07:20,352 --> 00:07:21,396
Frank.
207
00:07:21,396 --> 00:07:22,572
- Frank!
- What?
208
00:07:22,572 --> 00:07:24,095
How much longer?
209
00:07:24,095 --> 00:07:26,880
- Three hours.
- Oh, my God.
210
00:07:26,880 --> 00:07:28,360
Can I watch
what you're watching?
211
00:07:28,360 --> 00:07:29,535
'Cause the Wi-Fi
is not strong enough
212
00:07:29,535 --> 00:07:30,928
for me to watch anything.
213
00:07:30,928 --> 00:07:32,669
You should have
downloaded movies, then.
214
00:07:32,669 --> 00:07:35,280
I mean, I also have to go
to the bathroom.
215
00:07:35,280 --> 00:07:38,109
Well, that's not good.
Bathroom on the plane is busted.
216
00:07:38,109 --> 00:07:40,938
- W-What?
- Yeah, but you can use
the emergency can.
217
00:07:40,938 --> 00:07:42,287
Where's the emergency can?
218
00:07:42,287 --> 00:07:43,723
- You're sitting on it.
- What? Wh...
219
00:07:43,723 --> 00:07:45,812
You just pull that cushion up
and, uh, get that
220
00:07:45,812 --> 00:07:47,553
privacy screen over there.
221
00:07:47,553 --> 00:07:49,250
Is it a number one
or a number two?
222
00:07:49,250 --> 00:07:51,122
It's a number one.
223
00:07:51,122 --> 00:07:52,558
Eh, let 'er rip.
224
00:07:52,558 --> 00:07:54,560
It's still gonna go out
in the air anyway.
225
00:07:54,560 --> 00:07:56,519
Are you sure you don't have
any food anywhere?
226
00:07:56,519 --> 00:07:58,303
Why don't you sniff around
back there?
227
00:07:58,303 --> 00:07:59,565
What's this?
228
00:07:59,565 --> 00:08:01,001
- What's that?
- There's a can of something.
229
00:08:01,001 --> 00:08:03,177
Oh, that's an old can of oysters
from another flight.
230
00:08:03,177 --> 00:08:05,440
- A can of oysters?
- Yeah, go ahead, have them.
231
00:08:05,440 --> 00:08:07,007
Ugh, goddamn it.
232
00:08:07,921 --> 00:08:09,619
[Dennis]
All right, all right.
233
00:08:09,619 --> 00:08:10,707
- Getting pretty close here.
- Okay, now,
234
00:08:10,707 --> 00:08:11,795
just go with me here, Dennis.
235
00:08:11,795 --> 00:08:13,492
I want you to picture it,
all right?
236
00:08:13,492 --> 00:08:15,929
It's a whole
lifestyle ecosystem.
237
00:08:15,929 --> 00:08:17,409
- No...
- With booze and suits
238
00:08:17,409 --> 00:08:19,759
and apps that link you
to personal trainers
239
00:08:19,759 --> 00:08:21,456
who make you look good
in the suits. Premium.
240
00:08:21,456 --> 00:08:23,284
- Dude, this is what I'm saying.
- No, listen, can we please,
241
00:08:23,284 --> 00:08:25,765
please, please just
stick with the blend?
242
00:08:25,765 --> 00:08:27,898
- Stick with the blend.
- This is a blend of ideas.
243
00:08:27,898 --> 00:08:29,247
Yes, but it's a blend of
too many ideas. I don't even
244
00:08:29,247 --> 00:08:31,205
know what you're talking about
half the time.
245
00:08:31,205 --> 00:08:33,381
- I'm talking about
branding, bro, it's branding.
- I know what you're...
246
00:08:33,381 --> 00:08:34,382
You know what, actually,
you just keep
247
00:08:34,382 --> 00:08:35,645
your mouth shut the whole time.
248
00:08:35,645 --> 00:08:37,429
Just keep your
mouth shut, I'll do the talking.
249
00:08:37,429 --> 00:08:39,474
We do the firm handshake, right?
'Cause that's essential
250
00:08:39,474 --> 00:08:40,911
to setting tone
for a good pitch.
251
00:08:40,911 --> 00:08:42,869
Got to have a firm handshake.
And then that's it.
252
00:08:42,869 --> 00:08:45,002
I do the talking,
and don't say a goddamn thing
253
00:08:45,002 --> 00:08:46,656
about booze and suits and apps.
254
00:08:46,656 --> 00:08:48,571
- Here we go.
- Oh, okay.
255
00:08:48,571 --> 00:08:50,181
- Thank you.
- Thanks, ladies.
- Thank you so much.
256
00:08:50,181 --> 00:08:52,226
- Uh, all right. Come on, guys.
- [Dennis] All right.
257
00:08:52,226 --> 00:08:53,532
- Okay, here we go.
- Hey, there, fellas.
- Hey.
258
00:08:53,532 --> 00:08:55,316
Hi, uh, hello to you, kind sirs.
259
00:08:55,316 --> 00:08:57,318
- [chuckles]
- Let's do a...
260
00:08:57,318 --> 00:08:59,625
- Oh, uh...
- No.
261
00:08:59,625 --> 00:09:02,759
No, I'm sorry,
we-we don't shake hands. So...
262
00:09:02,759 --> 00:09:04,804
Uh, well, that kind of
throws off my whole thing.
263
00:09:04,804 --> 00:09:06,589
I think... We can't kick this off
without a firm handshake.
264
00:09:06,589 --> 00:09:08,634
- Why don't you just...
- I really don't mind
shaking his hand.
265
00:09:08,634 --> 00:09:10,288
How many times do we have
to go through this?
266
00:09:10,288 --> 00:09:12,507
- We're not shaking hands.
- We're not shaking hands.
267
00:09:12,507 --> 00:09:13,508
- We don't know these people.
- Don't know you.
268
00:09:13,508 --> 00:09:15,032
- Sorry.
- Oh.
269
00:09:15,032 --> 00:09:16,250
Wow, look at that suit.
270
00:09:16,250 --> 00:09:17,730
- Yeah. Look at that.
- I love that.
271
00:09:17,730 --> 00:09:19,863
I'm not supposed to talk.
272
00:09:19,863 --> 00:09:21,516
- [Dennis] I didn't say...
I didn't say...
- I'm not supposed to, either.
273
00:09:21,516 --> 00:09:23,214
Oh... Come on,
let's get this going.
274
00:09:23,214 --> 00:09:24,563
- He's-he's kidding.
He's kidding.
- Uh, yeah, so-so...
275
00:09:24,563 --> 00:09:26,043
- He's kidding.
- Oh, yes. He, uh, just...
276
00:09:26,043 --> 00:09:28,567
- Yeah, but...
- Come on, everybody say,
"Dos Hombres."
277
00:09:28,567 --> 00:09:30,395
- Oh, uh...
- [all] Dos Hombres!
278
00:09:30,395 --> 00:09:31,875
- All right, you can get
- Thanks so much.
- Yeah, so, we have a...
279
00:09:31,875 --> 00:09:33,137
the photos with the QR code
that way.
280
00:09:33,137 --> 00:09:34,355
- There you go.
- No, I don't need a photo.
281
00:09:34,355 --> 00:09:35,748
Actually, I-I just
wanted to pitch you...
282
00:09:35,748 --> 00:09:38,882
- I...
- All right, hey. All right.
283
00:09:38,882 --> 00:09:40,231
What just happened?
284
00:09:40,231 --> 00:09:41,580
You blew it, dude.
You choked.
285
00:09:41,580 --> 00:09:43,843
I didn't choke, no.
It was... Malcolm.
286
00:09:43,843 --> 00:09:45,540
He was throwing me a weird vibe.
287
00:09:45,540 --> 00:09:47,368
- Yeah. He's very aggressive.
- He's super aggressive.
288
00:09:47,368 --> 00:09:49,283
He's, like, he's, like
the alpha dog, dude.
289
00:09:49,283 --> 00:09:50,589
- I didn't like that.
- Malcolm's not in the middle.
290
00:09:50,589 --> 00:09:52,286
- He's on top.
- He's on top.
291
00:09:52,286 --> 00:09:54,288
- Shit.
- You know what, let's-let's
get back in the line.
292
00:09:56,247 --> 00:09:58,292
[coughing]
293
00:10:01,469 --> 00:10:03,689
Oh. Hey.
294
00:10:03,689 --> 00:10:04,821
Hey.
295
00:10:04,821 --> 00:10:06,997
Hey, buddy.
[clears throat]
296
00:10:08,302 --> 00:10:09,739
Hey, can I ask you something
really quick?
297
00:10:09,739 --> 00:10:11,697
- Yeah, sure, man. What's up?
- Uh, hey, listen,
298
00:10:11,697 --> 00:10:13,177
I've been throwing up
for a little bit.
299
00:10:13,177 --> 00:10:14,395
Ugh, dude, sorry.
300
00:10:14,395 --> 00:10:15,832
Yeah, I-I actually
kind of can't stop.
301
00:10:15,832 --> 00:10:17,790
I think I'm having
a reaction to the metals.
302
00:10:17,790 --> 00:10:19,313
But, uh, my real problem
is, like,
303
00:10:19,313 --> 00:10:21,315
no matter how much I hurl,
like, the nickels
304
00:10:21,315 --> 00:10:23,622
- keep coming out.
- Nickels?
305
00:10:23,622 --> 00:10:25,624
Oh, yeah, it's a 'schlaäger play
I got going.
306
00:10:25,624 --> 00:10:27,147
So, hey, look,
can you do me a favor?
307
00:10:27,147 --> 00:10:28,714
On my next hurl,
you know, do you...
308
00:10:28,714 --> 00:10:31,021
could you see if you see any
loose change in there, you know?
309
00:10:31,021 --> 00:10:33,850
'Cause, like, I-I really got to
get a extra set of eyes on this.
310
00:10:33,850 --> 00:10:35,721
- I can't help you. All right?
I-I'm waiting for somebody.
- Please, please.
311
00:10:35,721 --> 00:10:36,809
- Sir, I'm begging you, please.
- It's not happening.
312
00:10:36,809 --> 00:10:39,464
Listen, man,
I can't help, all right?
313
00:10:39,464 --> 00:10:40,726
Oh, my God, I'm so sorry!
314
00:10:40,726 --> 00:10:41,901
What the hell?!
315
00:10:41,901 --> 00:10:43,642
- Damn it!
- Oh! Hey.
316
00:10:43,642 --> 00:10:44,904
- Hey, man, hey, hey.
- Come here.
317
00:10:44,904 --> 00:10:46,253
Come here. Look at this.
Look at this.
318
00:10:46,253 --> 00:10:47,559
- Okay. Yes, sir.
- Look at this.
319
00:10:47,559 --> 00:10:48,691
They're gonna ding me
for the cleaning fee.
320
00:10:48,691 --> 00:10:49,909
- All right?
- Ah, yeah, look at that.
321
00:10:49,909 --> 00:10:51,128
Peace and love, peace and love.
322
00:10:51,128 --> 00:10:52,564
- Damn it!
- I'm sorry! Hey, hey.
323
00:10:52,564 --> 00:10:53,957
- Just say by my car.
Stay by my car
- Hey, hey.
324
00:10:53,957 --> 00:10:55,088
- Hey, hey!
- and watch this,
I got to figure this out.
325
00:10:55,088 --> 00:10:56,524
- Get by the car.
- Okay, okay, okay.
326
00:10:56,524 --> 00:10:58,048
I got your car.
I'll watch your car.
327
00:10:58,048 --> 00:10:59,397
Yeah. [coughs]
328
00:10:59,397 --> 00:11:01,442
[grunts] He was a big boy.
329
00:11:01,442 --> 00:11:03,183
- Jesus. [coughing]
- Damn it.
330
00:11:03,183 --> 00:11:04,750
[Charlie groans]
331
00:11:04,750 --> 00:11:06,578
Hey, man, are you
the Dos Hombres driver?
332
00:11:07,448 --> 00:11:08,885
Who?
333
00:11:08,885 --> 00:11:09,712
You know,
the Malcolm in the Middle guys.
334
00:11:11,409 --> 00:11:12,584
Yes, I am.
335
00:11:12,584 --> 00:11:13,933
Come on, come on.
336
00:11:15,326 --> 00:11:16,631
The dad did like my suit.
337
00:11:16,631 --> 00:11:19,069
Would you shut up
about the dad and the suit?
338
00:11:19,069 --> 00:11:20,592
- Thank you very much.
- [Dennis] What are they doing?
339
00:11:20,592 --> 00:11:21,854
- Oh, great. Okay.
- [Dennis] Damn it.
340
00:11:21,854 --> 00:11:23,116
They're wrapping things up.
341
00:11:23,116 --> 00:11:24,814
That's great. We blew it.
342
00:11:24,814 --> 00:11:27,338
We totally blew our one shot.
Goddamn it.
343
00:11:27,338 --> 00:11:29,514
Hey, I think
I just saw Jalen Hurts.
344
00:11:29,514 --> 00:11:30,994
- What? Seriously? Where?
- Yeah.
345
00:11:30,994 --> 00:11:32,343
Dude, he just went
into the bathroom.
346
00:11:32,343 --> 00:11:33,736
I'm sure that was him.
347
00:11:33,736 --> 00:11:35,520
Okay, uh, listen.
We're gonna pivot, all right?
348
00:11:35,520 --> 00:11:37,261
I mean, Jalen's a better fit for
our Philly-based brand anyway,
349
00:11:37,261 --> 00:11:39,350
- don't you think?
- Yeah.
350
00:11:39,350 --> 00:11:40,699
- Let's go talk to Jalen.
- Let's get Jalen.
351
00:11:40,699 --> 00:11:42,266
Come on, let's go.
352
00:11:42,266 --> 00:11:44,485
- [urinating]
- Jalen.
- Yeah,
353
00:11:44,485 --> 00:11:46,139
so, hey, listen, uh,
I know this is a little weird,
354
00:11:46,139 --> 00:11:48,402
us bum-rushing you in the
bathroom like this, but, uh...
355
00:11:48,402 --> 00:11:50,404
You always were good
against the rush.
356
00:11:50,404 --> 00:11:51,971
[laughs] Now, that is true.
You are good against the ru...
357
00:11:51,971 --> 00:11:54,191
Now, you're not gonna get away
from us, though. [laughs]
358
00:11:54,191 --> 00:11:55,888
We gotcha.
359
00:11:55,888 --> 00:11:57,324
That was a joke. Um...
360
00:11:57,324 --> 00:11:59,065
[urinating continuing]
361
00:11:59,065 --> 00:12:01,720
Okay, uh, well, listen, uh,
we-we just, uh,
362
00:12:01,720 --> 00:12:02,852
we wanted to pitch you
363
00:12:02,852 --> 00:12:05,376
a-a really great
business opportunity.
364
00:12:05,376 --> 00:12:07,030
Yes, now imagine this lifestyle:
365
00:12:07,030 --> 00:12:09,206
you're on a Caribbean island
in an ill-fitting suit.
366
00:12:09,206 --> 00:12:11,991
No, no, st... no, uh, Jalen,
we're not-not here to...
367
00:12:11,991 --> 00:12:13,253
- pitch you a lifestyle.
- [toilet flushes]
368
00:12:16,169 --> 00:12:18,563
- Gritty?
- Wait...
369
00:12:18,563 --> 00:12:20,043
- What the hell is this?
- Wh... I...
370
00:12:20,043 --> 00:12:21,479
I thought you said Jalen Hurts
came in here.
371
00:12:21,479 --> 00:12:22,828
Is he in one
of the other stalls?
372
00:12:22,828 --> 00:12:25,091
I don't know, I must have
gotten them confused.
373
00:12:25,091 --> 00:12:26,353
How do you confuse
a young Black man
374
00:12:26,353 --> 00:12:27,833
with a giant orange monster?
375
00:12:27,833 --> 00:12:29,313
- Uh...
- [squeak]
376
00:12:29,313 --> 00:12:32,098
Okay, Gritty, picture yourself
on a Caribbean island.
377
00:12:32,098 --> 00:12:34,579
- Don't pitch Gritty! We're here
to talk to a celebrity.
- [toilet flushes]
378
00:12:34,579 --> 00:12:37,190
- Gritty's just Gritty.
- [squeak]
379
00:12:37,190 --> 00:12:40,280
What... Oh, hey, Jalen! Jalen!
There he is. Jalen!
380
00:12:40,280 --> 00:12:42,456
- Ah, we just missed him.
- What are you talking about?
381
00:12:42,456 --> 00:12:44,545
- That was not Jalen Hurts.
- Yes, it was.
382
00:12:44,545 --> 00:12:46,069
Oh, don't take his side, Gritty.
383
00:12:46,069 --> 00:12:48,636
- Well, he's right.
- That was definitely
Jalen Hurts.
384
00:12:48,636 --> 00:12:49,942
Uh, you know what, Gritty,
we don't need you anymore.
385
00:12:49,942 --> 00:12:51,509
Why don't you take a hike, pal?
386
00:12:51,509 --> 00:12:53,076
- Appreciate it.
- [squeak]
387
00:12:53,076 --> 00:12:54,773
- [phone ringing]
- Goddamn it.
388
00:12:54,773 --> 00:12:56,035
Hold on a second.
Oh, it's Charlie.
389
00:12:56,035 --> 00:12:57,645
What... Wait, wait, wait.
390
00:12:57,645 --> 00:12:59,169
- What do you want, man?
- [Charlie] Hey, uh,
391
00:12:59,169 --> 00:13:01,519
Dennis, uh, get to Frank
as fast as you can.
392
00:13:01,519 --> 00:13:03,564
I have Malcolm and his dad.
393
00:13:03,564 --> 00:13:05,262
- Are you serious?
- I'll explain later.
394
00:13:05,262 --> 00:13:06,829
Just... I'll delay them
as long as I can.
395
00:13:06,829 --> 00:13:08,004
[Aaron]
Hey, could you maybe just
396
00:13:08,004 --> 00:13:09,222
not be on the-the phone?
397
00:13:09,222 --> 00:13:10,354
- Yeah? Okay.
- Oh, yeah.
398
00:13:10,354 --> 00:13:11,616
Of course, sir.
Yeah, I got to go.
399
00:13:11,616 --> 00:13:13,444
- Please? Thank you.
- Uh, sorry about that.
400
00:13:13,444 --> 00:13:14,662
- Very unprofessional.
- Thank you very much.
401
00:13:14,662 --> 00:13:16,229
- Uh, apologies.
- Yeah, that's okay.
402
00:13:16,229 --> 00:13:17,535
[sniffs]
403
00:13:17,535 --> 00:13:18,928
Does it smell funky in here?
404
00:13:18,928 --> 00:13:20,320
Very funky.
405
00:13:20,320 --> 00:13:22,801
- Oh, you guys
picking up an aroma?
- Yeah.
406
00:13:22,801 --> 00:13:24,194
- Yeah.
- Yeah, yeah, all right.
407
00:13:24,194 --> 00:13:25,760
You... There might be a funk
to it, Mr. Malcolm.
408
00:13:25,760 --> 00:13:27,806
I did vomit in here earlier.
409
00:13:27,806 --> 00:13:30,635
Oh, oh, great.
Thank you for that.
410
00:13:30,635 --> 00:13:34,073
Wow. And my name is not
Mr. Malcolm, it's Aaron.
411
00:13:34,073 --> 00:13:35,901
[Charlie]
Okay, I got you. Yeah, yeah.
412
00:13:35,901 --> 00:13:37,076
We can go by whatever code name
413
00:13:37,076 --> 00:13:38,686
you feel most
comfortable with, sir.
414
00:13:38,686 --> 00:13:40,340
You know, I can't imagine
the pressures of being
415
00:13:40,340 --> 00:13:42,125
- a Hollywood celebrity.
- Oh, oh, please, please, please!
416
00:13:42,125 --> 00:13:43,343
- [horn honks]
- Watch the road, watch the road.
- Oh, yeah! Shit!
417
00:13:43,343 --> 00:13:45,911
- Jesus.
- Pardon my language.
418
00:13:45,911 --> 00:13:47,870
Yeah, sorry about that.
Uh, pardon my driving.
419
00:13:47,870 --> 00:13:49,915
I haven't driven a car
in a long, long time.
420
00:13:49,915 --> 00:13:52,483
I... We really got to start
vetting these drivers.
421
00:13:52,483 --> 00:13:54,746
Okay? If we're driving around
in these crappy town cars
422
00:13:54,746 --> 00:13:56,617
with lunatics
and now we're flying coach?
423
00:13:56,617 --> 00:13:57,836
- Counterpoint.
- Coach?
424
00:13:57,836 --> 00:13:59,838
I do like the grit.
425
00:13:59,838 --> 00:14:01,361
- [Aaron] Oh, my God.
- Don't you?
426
00:14:01,361 --> 00:14:03,233
I mean, it's associating
with the common man.
427
00:14:03,233 --> 00:14:04,669
- Talking about me?
- Yes.
428
00:14:04,669 --> 00:14:06,192
- Oh, yeah, sure. Yeah, yeah.
- Yeah.
429
00:14:06,192 --> 00:14:08,020
- Absolutely.
- When I first stepped
onto the boards
430
00:14:08,020 --> 00:14:09,892
in the Great White Way
of Broadway...
431
00:14:09,892 --> 00:14:13,286
- Oh, and here we go again
about Broadway.
- Was I in the role
432
00:14:13,286 --> 00:14:14,940
- of Richard III? No.
- Were you? No?
433
00:14:14,940 --> 00:14:16,376
- Slipping it in, of course.
- No.
434
00:14:16,376 --> 00:14:17,856
- I was his understudy.
- Okay.
435
00:14:17,856 --> 00:14:19,858
- [groans]
- I never really got
to be on stage.
436
00:14:19,858 --> 00:14:21,338
- Okay.
- But I was very close.
437
00:14:21,338 --> 00:14:22,861
- You had to earn it, huh?
- [laughs]
438
00:14:22,861 --> 00:14:25,646
- You had to earn it.
- It's all about the work,
isn't it?
439
00:14:25,646 --> 00:14:26,821
- See? He's working,
we're working.
- Yeah, right?
440
00:14:26,821 --> 00:14:28,127
Yeah, we're... We are working.
441
00:14:28,127 --> 00:14:30,869
Now, you can never forget
where you came from.
442
00:14:30,869 --> 00:14:33,045
- Remember how you got here?
Remember, huh?
- Yes.
443
00:14:33,045 --> 00:14:36,135
This clown lost all of his money
playing slots
444
00:14:36,135 --> 00:14:38,746
- at Pechanga. Yeah.
- It... I-I...
445
00:14:38,746 --> 00:14:40,879
[Aaron]
No, you have a problem.
You know you have a problem.
446
00:14:40,879 --> 00:14:42,968
The first step:
admitting you have a problem.
447
00:14:42,968 --> 00:14:46,189
I admit I am a servant
to the gods of chance.
448
00:14:46,189 --> 00:14:47,494
I pray at their altar.
449
00:14:47,494 --> 00:14:48,887
- Yeah, way too much.
- Come on, baby.
450
00:14:48,887 --> 00:14:50,019
- Way too much.
- Yeah, come on, baby!
451
00:14:50,019 --> 00:14:52,064
[laughs]
Let 'er roll!
452
00:14:52,064 --> 00:14:53,936
- Let 'er rip!
- No, this guy was a week away
453
00:14:53,936 --> 00:14:56,112
from sucking off tourists, okay?
454
00:14:56,112 --> 00:14:58,941
- Oh, my God.
- To pay his rent,
and you know that.
455
00:14:58,941 --> 00:15:00,681
Fellas, you're not gonna
have to suck anyone off.
456
00:15:00,681 --> 00:15:02,988
I'm taking you guys straight
to a private plane today.
457
00:15:02,988 --> 00:15:04,685
- Hmm?
- Oh, great. Finally. See? See?
458
00:15:04,685 --> 00:15:06,731
There you go. Aren't you happy?
459
00:15:06,731 --> 00:15:07,993
- Doesn't that feel nice?
- I'm very happy. Yes.
460
00:15:07,993 --> 00:15:09,560
- [phone ringing]
- [Aaron] Finally. Okay.
461
00:15:09,560 --> 00:15:11,736
Sorry, I happen to be getting
another-another call here.
462
00:15:11,736 --> 00:15:13,564
- I got to take it.
Hello, this is the driver.
- [Aaron] Oh, my...
463
00:15:13,564 --> 00:15:16,349
Hey, Charlie!
You said to call when we landed.
464
00:15:16,349 --> 00:15:18,351
What? We landed?
465
00:15:18,351 --> 00:15:21,267
We landed 20 minutes ago.
I'm just gassing up.
466
00:15:21,267 --> 00:15:23,226
Oh, goddamn it,
why didn't you tell me that?
467
00:15:23,226 --> 00:15:25,358
I wouldn't have eaten
the disgusting oysters.
468
00:15:25,358 --> 00:15:26,751
- Ugh.
- You ate those oysters?
469
00:15:26,751 --> 00:15:28,187
What? You told me to.
470
00:15:28,187 --> 00:15:30,450
That can is from
a shellfish company I started
471
00:15:30,450 --> 00:15:31,974
with Tony Danza
back in the '80s.
472
00:15:31,974 --> 00:15:34,193
Tony's Oysters in a Can-za?
473
00:15:34,193 --> 00:15:36,108
- It was a catchy name.
Didn't go anywhere.
- Goddamn you.
474
00:15:36,108 --> 00:15:37,892
Gross. I am out of here.
475
00:15:37,892 --> 00:15:39,111
- [coughing]
- [Charlie] Frank?
476
00:15:39,111 --> 00:15:40,417
- Charlie.
- Uh, this is Mr. Frank.
477
00:15:40,417 --> 00:15:41,635
He's the owner of the plane.
478
00:15:41,635 --> 00:15:43,420
- Oh, perfect.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
479
00:15:43,420 --> 00:15:45,639
Uh, yes, Mr. Frank?
I have the father and son.
480
00:15:45,639 --> 00:15:48,729
You got them, Charlie?
Bring them over right away.
481
00:15:48,729 --> 00:15:50,296
All right. Ha, ha!
482
00:15:50,296 --> 00:15:52,951
Charlie got Malcolm and his dad.
483
00:15:52,951 --> 00:15:54,474
- Oh, shit. Are you serious?
- [whoops]
484
00:15:54,474 --> 00:15:56,433
- Oh, I'm staying.
- What are you talking about?
485
00:15:56,433 --> 00:15:58,522
You've been complaining about
getting off the plane.
486
00:15:58,522 --> 00:16:00,132
Now all of a sudden
you're staying?
487
00:16:00,132 --> 00:16:01,960
- [coughs]
- All right. Hey, guys. Come on.
488
00:16:01,960 --> 00:16:03,092
Let's go. Out of the cabin.
489
00:16:03,092 --> 00:16:04,789
What-what...
I'm not leaving my plane.
490
00:16:04,789 --> 00:16:06,443
Oh, no, we've had
this whole situation
491
00:16:06,443 --> 00:16:08,314
where Jalen Hurts felt trapped
and he just freaked out
492
00:16:08,314 --> 00:16:10,316
- and ran away.
- It was not Jalen Hurts, okay?
493
00:16:10,316 --> 00:16:11,839
- It was literally
just some Black guy.
- I... It was definitely
494
00:16:11,839 --> 00:16:13,145
- Jalen Hurts. Either way,
- It was not Jalen Hurts.
495
00:16:13,145 --> 00:16:14,538
- let's just go. Let's go.
- Let's go. Come on.
496
00:16:14,538 --> 00:16:16,192
- Up, up, up.
- Ugh, all right, all right.
497
00:16:19,412 --> 00:16:22,633
Now, this is how to travel.
498
00:16:22,633 --> 00:16:24,156
- Yeah.
- [sighs]
499
00:16:24,156 --> 00:16:26,898
Yeah, but I always wonder
at whose expense.
500
00:16:26,898 --> 00:16:28,900
You know,
when I was making my way
501
00:16:28,900 --> 00:16:30,684
on the Great White Way
of Broadway...
502
00:16:30,684 --> 00:16:32,512
- Oh, my God. Jesus... Hey.
- It was hard.
503
00:16:32,512 --> 00:16:33,948
You know, I-I have an idea.
504
00:16:33,948 --> 00:16:36,081
Why don't you just shut
your eyes and go to sleep?
505
00:16:36,081 --> 00:16:39,215
And then I will let you know
when you can wake up.
506
00:16:39,215 --> 00:16:41,217
- Okay? Shh.
- Okay. Thank you.
507
00:16:41,217 --> 00:16:43,088
Okay.
508
00:16:43,088 --> 00:16:44,916
- Oh, but sleep's for pussies.
- Geez.
509
00:16:44,916 --> 00:16:47,223
Let's party, am I right?
Hey, guys, I'm Dee.
510
00:16:47,223 --> 00:16:49,181
Jesus, where'd you come from?
511
00:16:49,181 --> 00:16:51,096
I didn't know we were
sharing the plane.
512
00:16:51,096 --> 00:16:53,185
- Yeah, I...
- Ah! [laughs]
513
00:16:53,185 --> 00:16:55,013
Hi, I'm Frank, the owner.
514
00:16:55,013 --> 00:16:56,884
And you don't
have to share the plane.
515
00:16:56,884 --> 00:17:00,366
This plane, this
pretty little bird can be yours
516
00:17:00,366 --> 00:17:03,152
for a mere price of $35 mil.
517
00:17:03,152 --> 00:17:04,457
- [Dennis] Sorry, actually, um...
- [Aaron groans]
518
00:17:04,457 --> 00:17:06,111
- It's a beautiful bird.
- Hey, guys, don't worry.
519
00:17:06,111 --> 00:17:07,504
We're not-not here to sell you
a plane. Frank, please, don't.
520
00:17:07,504 --> 00:17:09,245
Yeah, we want to...
We-we'd sell the plane
521
00:17:09,245 --> 00:17:11,073
- We would, but that's
not the point.
- if you would go for it,
522
00:17:11,073 --> 00:17:12,378
- you'd buy it.
- Just... We're not selling
the plane.
523
00:17:12,378 --> 00:17:14,206
- Okay, we're here
to sell you, um...
- A lifestyle
524
00:17:14,206 --> 00:17:15,816
- No, no.
- and ill-fitting suits.
525
00:17:15,816 --> 00:17:17,557
- No, no, no, uh,
that-that's also wrong.
- [laughs]
526
00:17:17,557 --> 00:17:19,124
- We're not selling
any of that, okay?
- Okay.
527
00:17:19,124 --> 00:17:20,691
- [laughs]
- No, no, no. Let's-let's... No.
528
00:17:20,691 --> 00:17:21,909
We're here to sell you a, uh...
529
00:17:21,909 --> 00:17:23,389
Nickelschlaäger!
530
00:17:23,389 --> 00:17:24,782
No, goddamn it! None of that.
531
00:17:24,782 --> 00:17:26,131
None of that. Okay,
listen-listen to me. Listen.
532
00:17:26,131 --> 00:17:27,437
- Look, we're just... Listen.
- He's the driver.
533
00:17:27,437 --> 00:17:29,221
Let's just start over, okay?
534
00:17:29,221 --> 00:17:31,136
We're gonna start all over,
and we're gonna do it
535
00:17:31,136 --> 00:17:32,964
with a firm handshake.
536
00:17:33,965 --> 00:17:35,880
Oh. I'm not supposed to.
537
00:17:35,880 --> 00:17:37,273
- Oh, come on, man.
- [Mac] I think you're in
538
00:17:37,273 --> 00:17:38,752
an abusive relationship.
539
00:17:38,752 --> 00:17:41,625
Okay! This is absolutely insane.
540
00:17:41,625 --> 00:17:43,235
Put your hand down, Bryan.
541
00:17:43,235 --> 00:17:45,411
But I don't mind shaking
his hand, really, I don't...
542
00:17:45,411 --> 00:17:46,934
No, put it down,
you silly little bitch.
543
00:17:46,934 --> 00:17:48,153
Put it down.
544
00:17:48,153 --> 00:17:50,373
- Put it down.
- No.
545
00:17:50,373 --> 00:17:51,852
Don't you touch him.
546
00:17:51,852 --> 00:17:54,028
I said no.
547
00:17:54,028 --> 00:17:56,509
[Aaron]
What? Oh, my God.
548
00:17:56,509 --> 00:17:58,207
What is happening?
549
00:17:59,469 --> 00:18:00,861
Sit down.
550
00:18:00,861 --> 00:18:02,776
Please, just sit down.
551
00:18:03,864 --> 00:18:05,475
- You want us to sit down?
- Sit down, please,
552
00:18:05,475 --> 00:18:07,520
- all of you.
- We-we will sit down.
553
00:18:07,520 --> 00:18:08,913
[Dennis]
Yeah, why don't we all sit down?
554
00:18:08,913 --> 00:18:12,177
I don't ask for a lot.
555
00:18:12,177 --> 00:18:14,658
An Emmy here, a Tony there.
556
00:18:14,658 --> 00:18:17,617
Little pocket change for
the one-armed succubus in Reno.
557
00:18:17,617 --> 00:18:18,879
But you.
558
00:18:20,316 --> 00:18:22,927
You, you're...
It's never enough for you.
559
00:18:22,927 --> 00:18:24,668
You want it all.
560
00:18:24,668 --> 00:18:26,757
And you deceived me
into thinking
561
00:18:26,757 --> 00:18:29,281
that-that I wanted it all, too,
and I don't.
562
00:18:29,281 --> 00:18:32,458
And you took charge
of our little operation,
563
00:18:32,458 --> 00:18:34,373
and ever since then,
564
00:18:34,373 --> 00:18:38,290
you've been... you've been
controlling my life.
565
00:18:40,814 --> 00:18:43,339
You control everything.
566
00:18:45,906 --> 00:18:47,125
Or do you?
567
00:18:49,867 --> 00:18:51,912
Maybe...
568
00:18:51,912 --> 00:18:54,480
you are the one being deceived.
569
00:18:54,480 --> 00:18:57,962
Maybe being the front man
570
00:18:57,962 --> 00:19:00,486
of an alcohol business
571
00:19:00,486 --> 00:19:03,881
places your head
so far out in front of you
572
00:19:03,881 --> 00:19:06,666
that you don't even realize
573
00:19:06,666 --> 00:19:09,234
that your neck is exposed.
574
00:19:09,234 --> 00:19:12,324
Enough to be lopped off
575
00:19:12,324 --> 00:19:14,065
by a public
576
00:19:14,065 --> 00:19:16,328
so thirsty to taste the blood
577
00:19:16,328 --> 00:19:18,809
of greedy celebrities.
578
00:19:20,811 --> 00:19:23,030
So, when they come...
579
00:19:23,030 --> 00:19:25,381
and they will...
580
00:19:25,381 --> 00:19:27,818
who are they gonna
come after, huh?
581
00:19:27,818 --> 00:19:30,690
The sweet, hapless boob...
582
00:19:31,996 --> 00:19:34,825
...or the slick-talking,
scheming millennial?
583
00:19:36,087 --> 00:19:38,263
[chuckles]
584
00:19:38,263 --> 00:19:41,005
So, I ask you...
585
00:19:41,962 --> 00:19:43,834
...bitch...
586
00:19:46,358 --> 00:19:48,752
...who is really in charge here?
587
00:19:48,752 --> 00:19:50,623
[sniffs]
588
00:19:50,623 --> 00:19:53,583
[sighs]
589
00:19:53,583 --> 00:19:55,280
Boom.
590
00:19:55,280 --> 00:19:58,283
And that, my friends,
591
00:19:58,283 --> 00:19:59,763
is acting.
592
00:19:59,763 --> 00:20:01,721
- [laughs]
- What? Wow!
593
00:20:01,721 --> 00:20:04,115
- What?!
- Wait, wait.
594
00:20:04,115 --> 00:20:05,769
- That was...
- That-that was all fake?
595
00:20:05,769 --> 00:20:07,553
Made it all up.
Fake, fake, fake, fake.
596
00:20:07,553 --> 00:20:08,989
No offense, anything I said.
597
00:20:08,989 --> 00:20:10,208
- Oh, no, you're welcome...
- I was just joking.
598
00:20:10,208 --> 00:20:11,514
But I do love to perform.
599
00:20:11,514 --> 00:20:13,603
- I do, it's in my blood.
- You got the stuff.
600
00:20:13,603 --> 00:20:16,040
Uh, you should consider
doing a drama, Mr. Middle.
601
00:20:16,040 --> 00:20:17,389
- You really should
consider doing drama.
- Yeah.
602
00:20:17,389 --> 00:20:18,782
- That's a good idea.
- I think you got the goods, man.
603
00:20:18,782 --> 00:20:20,262
Hey, so listen,
do you guys want to invest?
604
00:20:21,306 --> 00:20:23,090
- Boss?
- Fuck no.
605
00:20:23,090 --> 00:20:25,745
- Fuck no! No.
- Fuck no!
606
00:20:25,745 --> 00:20:27,007
[Aaron]
Of course not.
I don't want to spend
607
00:20:27,007 --> 00:20:28,313
another moment with you crazies.
608
00:20:28,313 --> 00:20:29,793
- Not another minute.
- You people are insane.
609
00:20:29,793 --> 00:20:31,621
Get me off this plane.
610
00:21:08,005 --> 00:21:10,834
[crowd chanting backwards]