1
00:00:03,067 --> 00:00:05,089
Burn! Burn! Burn!
2
00:00:05,158 --> 00:00:07,657
Burn! Burn! Burn! Burn! Burn!
3
00:00:07,726 --> 00:00:08,790
Burn! Burn! Burn!
4
00:00:08,859 --> 00:00:10,959
Hey! Burn, burn! Burn!
5
00:00:11,028 --> 00:00:12,487
Yeah, cool.
What are you guys burning?
6
00:00:12,607 --> 00:00:14,241
Bunch of garbage
7
00:00:14,242 --> 00:00:15,794
and burns the tar
that's just taking up space.
8
00:00:15,862 --> 00:00:17,061
No, goddamn it!
9
00:00:17,130 --> 00:00:19,151
Wait, Frank, why are
you burning our photo album pictures?
10
00:00:19,385 --> 00:00:20,949
What do you mean?
Because it's trash.
11
00:00:21,069 --> 00:00:23,244
You kidding me? Oh, my God!
12
00:00:23,313 --> 00:00:24,883
Dude, these are all the pictures
13
00:00:25,003 --> 00:00:27,348
from our Jersey Shore vacations.
You were gonna burn these?
14
00:00:27,416 --> 00:00:27,981
Yeah.
15
00:00:28,050 --> 00:00:29,751
These were, like, the
happiest days of our lives.
16
00:00:29,819 --> 00:00:31,555
Oh, come on, Jersey
Shore sucked.
17
00:00:31,623 --> 00:00:32,622
The Shore didn't suck, Frank.
18
00:00:32,691 --> 00:00:33,523
You sucked, okay?
19
00:00:33,592 --> 00:00:36,026
You just complained the whole time
and ruined it for everyone else.
20
00:00:36,095 --> 00:00:37,594
Yeah, because I had
to do all the work.
21
00:00:37,663 --> 00:00:38,563
I never got to relax.
22
00:00:38,632 --> 00:00:39,731
I would love to
go on a vacation.
23
00:00:39,800 --> 00:00:40,966
Oh, my God, me, too.
24
00:00:41,034 --> 00:00:42,200
I would love to
go on a vacation.
25
00:00:42,269 --> 00:00:43,803
Yeah, but not to the
Jersey Shore, though.
26
00:00:43,872 --> 00:00:45,471
I mean, that place
sounds like a nightmare.
27
00:00:45,540 --> 00:00:46,973
What's wrong with
the Jersey Shore?
28
00:00:47,041 --> 00:00:48,574
Come on.
You've seen that TV show.
29
00:00:48,642 --> 00:00:51,142
It's just a bunch of sweaty
Guidos getting hopped up
30
00:00:51,211 --> 00:00:53,244
on energy drinks and giving
each other diseases.
31
00:00:53,313 --> 00:00:55,179
Yeah, no, the Jersey Shore
is nothing like that.
32
00:00:55,247 --> 00:00:57,650
It's a magical place where
people swim in the ocean and
33
00:00:57,718 --> 00:01:00,488
they get to ride on fun rides and
they get to have their first kiss.
34
00:01:00,557 --> 00:01:01,622
Dude, you would love it.
35
00:01:01,691 --> 00:01:02,524
Well, hang on a second.
36
00:01:02,592 --> 00:01:03,458
I've never seen the ocean.
37
00:01:03,527 --> 00:01:06,462
I could get into that if you guys
want to go down to the Shore.
38
00:01:06,531 --> 00:01:06,996
Aw, yes!
39
00:01:07,065 --> 00:01:07,630
Yes!
40
00:01:07,699 --> 00:01:09,232
We should all go to
the Shore together.
41
00:01:09,301 --> 00:01:09,934
I'll tell you what.
42
00:01:10,002 --> 00:01:12,336
Maybe I'll knock myself out and
we'll head down to the Shore.
43
00:01:12,405 --> 00:01:14,305
Yeah, but I feel like you're
just gonna screw it up if you
44
00:01:14,373 --> 00:01:15,239
try and knock yourself out.
45
00:01:15,308 --> 00:01:17,143
Yeah, you're probably gonna
come to halfway there, and then
46
00:01:17,211 --> 00:01:18,277
complain the rest of the time.
47
00:01:18,346 --> 00:01:19,412
Yeah, I'll tell you what.
48
00:01:19,481 --> 00:01:21,981
Why don't I take the rag, I'll
get the chloroform, I'll get you
49
00:01:22,050 --> 00:01:23,383
when you least expect it.
50
00:01:23,453 --> 00:01:24,351
All right, sweet.
51
00:01:24,420 --> 00:01:24,953
Yeah?
52
00:01:25,022 --> 00:01:26,989
Yeah!
Goin' down to the Jersey Shore!
53
00:01:27,058 --> 00:01:28,724
Yeah, going to the Shore, baby!
54
00:01:28,792 --> 00:01:30,625
Now, this ocean,
explain it to me.
55
00:01:30,694 --> 00:01:32,460
It's, like, it goes on forever?
56
00:01:32,529 --> 00:01:34,095
Go to sleep, go to sleep.
57
00:01:35,098 --> 00:01:45,678
Sync & corrected by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
58
00:02:01,296 --> 00:02:03,073
So, I woke up, like, halfway
there, and then you just
59
00:02:03,173 --> 00:02:04,518
snuffed me out again, huh, Mac?
60
00:02:04,638 --> 00:02:06,938
Oh, this place turned
into a major shithole.
61
00:02:07,007 --> 00:02:09,652
It does not look exactly the
way I remember it looking.
62
00:02:09,772 --> 00:02:11,438
No, no, it's different,
it's different.
63
00:02:11,507 --> 00:02:13,974
The guy at the front desk said
there was meth lab explosion,
64
00:02:14,043 --> 00:02:14,908
so the hotel burned down.
65
00:02:14,977 --> 00:02:16,009
They had to rebuild it.
66
00:02:16,078 --> 00:02:16,743
Something like that.
67
00:02:16,812 --> 00:02:18,250
There's a smell, too, like...
Don't sweat it, you guys.
68
00:02:18,370 --> 00:02:20,678
Listen, with any luck at all,
we won't be spending any time
69
00:02:20,798 --> 00:02:22,204
here, so just think of
it more like a locker.
70
00:02:22,324 --> 00:02:22,989
Yes!
71
00:02:23,229 --> 00:02:25,827
I'm sorry, is no one gonna
talk about Dee's hair?
72
00:02:25,947 --> 00:02:26,912
Oh, I was waiting to pounce.
73
00:02:26,981 --> 00:02:28,380
I just didn't know
what our cue was.
74
00:02:28,449 --> 00:02:30,349
Yeah, I was waiting for
Dennis to jump on top of it.
75
00:02:30,418 --> 00:02:31,617
And then we were gonna slay her.
76
00:02:31,686 --> 00:02:32,184
Yeah.
77
00:02:32,253 --> 00:02:32,818
No, no. It's fine.
78
00:02:32,886 --> 00:02:34,619
All the cool girls get their
hair braided at the Shore.
79
00:02:34,688 --> 00:02:36,154
I think she looks like Bo Derek.
80
00:02:36,223 --> 00:02:36,821
Thank you, Dennis.
81
00:02:36,890 --> 00:02:39,457
Mm-hmm. You see, Dee and I have some
very fond memories of the Shore.
82
00:02:39,526 --> 00:02:41,560
We're not gonna have you
sullying those great memories
83
00:02:41,628 --> 00:02:42,561
with all your goddamn insults.
84
00:02:42,629 --> 00:02:43,195
Mm-mm.
85
00:02:43,263 --> 00:02:44,329
Are you drinking sunscreen?
86
00:02:44,398 --> 00:02:45,597
No, no, it's a decoy.
87
00:02:45,666 --> 00:02:47,900
We're drinking tequila out
of sunscreen bottles.
88
00:02:47,968 --> 00:02:50,969
Very strict open container
laws here at the Jersey Shore.
89
00:02:51,038 --> 00:02:54,407
Cheers.
90
00:02:54,475 --> 00:02:57,142
Holy shit!
91
00:02:57,211 --> 00:02:58,444
Is that the ocean?!
92
00:02:58,513 --> 00:02:59,078
Yep.
93
00:02:59,147 --> 00:03:00,580
Yeah, buddy, that's the ocean.
94
00:03:00,649 --> 00:03:02,949
What's on the other
side of it there?
95
00:03:03,018 --> 00:03:03,850
Europe.
96
00:03:03,919 --> 00:03:04,585
Yeah.
97
00:03:04,653 --> 00:03:05,919
Now, how long would it take...?
98
00:03:05,988 --> 00:03:07,287
Do not try and swim to Europe.
99
00:03:07,356 --> 00:03:07,821
No.
100
00:03:07,890 --> 00:03:08,722
Don't swim to Europe?
101
00:03:08,791 --> 00:03:09,289
Do not.
102
00:03:09,358 --> 00:03:11,459
As a matter of fact, why don't
you stick with Dee and I
103
00:03:11,527 --> 00:03:13,861
because we can show you the
ropes here at the Jersey Shore.
104
00:03:13,930 --> 00:03:16,164
All right, everybody, you
know what time it is!
105
00:03:16,233 --> 00:03:17,999
Let's go strut the beach.
106
00:03:18,068 --> 00:03:19,134
Not strutting shit.
107
00:03:19,202 --> 00:03:20,268
No beach strutting for me.
108
00:03:20,337 --> 00:03:22,137
I'm gonna find a place
to relax and unwind.
109
00:03:22,206 --> 00:03:23,005
Frank, I'm with you.
110
00:03:23,074 --> 00:03:23,939
Yeah.
111
00:03:24,008 --> 00:03:25,507
Why don't you grab
us some booze?
112
00:03:25,576 --> 00:03:27,876
I'll go down to the beach
and get us some prime real
113
00:03:27,944 --> 00:03:29,678
estate before those gorilla
dickheads get down there.
114
00:03:29,746 --> 00:03:31,713
Yeah. Gonna relax.
115
00:03:31,781 --> 00:03:32,780
Let's do it!
116
00:03:32,849 --> 00:03:34,548
Let's get out of here.
117
00:03:34,617 --> 00:03:38,285
Oh, man, this ocean breeze
feels so good on my scalp.
118
00:03:38,354 --> 00:03:39,219
Yeah, it feels awesome.
119
00:03:39,288 --> 00:03:41,121
The sand feels good
beneath my feet.
120
00:03:41,190 --> 00:03:41,655
Uh-huh.
121
00:03:41,724 --> 00:03:44,758
I'm a little curious as to where
all the people are, though.
122
00:03:44,826 --> 00:03:45,492
No idea, no idea.
123
00:03:45,560 --> 00:03:47,460
Didn't want to say anything,
didn't want to ruin the mood,
124
00:03:47,529 --> 00:03:48,395
but where are the people?
125
00:03:48,464 --> 00:03:50,097
I'm seeing a lot more
dogs than people, right?
126
00:03:50,166 --> 00:03:52,198
There are a shit-ton of
dogs out here, I tell ya.
127
00:03:52,267 --> 00:03:53,133
Where are their masters?
128
00:03:53,201 --> 00:03:54,668
I don't think these
dogs have masters.
129
00:03:54,736 --> 00:03:56,603
I think these dogs play
by their own rules.
130
00:03:56,671 --> 00:03:58,538
Well, clearly, the action
has shifted elsewhere.
131
00:03:58,607 --> 00:03:59,839
Want to go to the boardwalk?
132
00:03:59,908 --> 00:04:02,209
Hey, let's go to the boardwalk!
133
00:04:02,278 --> 00:04:02,843
Yes!
134
00:04:02,912 --> 00:04:03,877
Yeah! Hey, Charlie!
135
00:04:03,946 --> 00:04:04,511
Charlie!
136
00:04:04,580 --> 00:04:05,512
Come here!
137
00:04:06,248 --> 00:04:08,849
Dude, oh, my God, this
place is amazing!
138
00:04:08,917 --> 00:04:09,549
Right?
139
00:04:09,618 --> 00:04:10,216
Yeah!
140
00:04:10,285 --> 00:04:11,351
And the sun block drink?
141
00:04:11,420 --> 00:04:12,653
Nice, guys.
142
00:04:12,721 --> 00:04:13,487
They're really good.
143
00:04:13,555 --> 00:04:14,221
They're really good.
144
00:04:14,289 --> 00:04:17,390
Thing is, I didn't make you one.
145
00:04:17,459 --> 00:04:19,392
Oh! Jesus Chris, Charlie!
146
00:04:19,461 --> 00:04:20,860
You're drinking sun block.
147
00:04:20,929 --> 00:04:23,062
It's good. It gets you,
it gets you all.
148
00:04:23,131 --> 00:04:25,665
Yeah, you're ingesting viscous chemicals,
and they're getting you high.
149
00:04:25,734 --> 00:04:26,199
Doesn't matter.
150
00:04:26,267 --> 00:04:26,799
Doesn't matter.
151
00:04:26,868 --> 00:04:28,802
Okay, we're going to the boardwalk.
What do you say?
152
00:04:28,870 --> 00:04:29,435
Oh, really?
153
00:04:29,504 --> 00:04:30,369
You want to leave?
154
00:04:30,438 --> 00:04:30,970
Yeah.
155
00:04:31,039 --> 00:04:33,840
I feel like we're just scratching the
surface of all the cool shit out here.
156
00:04:33,908 --> 00:04:34,941
What cool shit?
157
00:04:35,010 --> 00:04:38,778
Well, the sea specimens, the
stray dogs, the trash that
158
00:04:38,847 --> 00:04:40,413
floated over from Europe.
159
00:04:40,482 --> 00:04:43,750
Yeah, but we didn't come here to
play with stray dogs and trash, man.
160
00:04:43,818 --> 00:04:45,685
We came here to soak
up the culture.
161
00:04:45,754 --> 00:04:47,921
And the boardwalk is the
cultural center of the Jersey
162
00:04:47,990 --> 00:04:49,022
Shore, so let's go there.
163
00:04:49,091 --> 00:04:49,890
Come on, man!
164
00:04:49,958 --> 00:04:50,958
Yeah, all right.
165
00:04:51,026 --> 00:04:53,293
Goin' to the boardwalk.
166
00:05:01,136 --> 00:05:05,907
Yo, Mac, you see that sign
there that says "Taxic spill"?
167
00:05:05,976 --> 00:05:07,008
Yeah.
168
00:05:07,077 --> 00:05:08,143
What's that?
169
00:05:08,212 --> 00:05:08,977
Disregard that, Frank.
170
00:05:09,046 --> 00:05:10,613
It's a bunch of
liberal bullshit.
171
00:05:10,682 --> 00:05:11,380
Right, right.
172
00:05:11,449 --> 00:05:12,582
This is a nice spot.
173
00:05:12,650 --> 00:05:13,950
Yeah, yeah. Whoa!
174
00:05:14,018 --> 00:05:15,184
What's that?
175
00:05:15,253 --> 00:05:16,919
You were supposed to get booze.
176
00:05:16,988 --> 00:05:19,555
Oh, this is ham soaked in rum.
177
00:05:19,624 --> 00:05:21,391
It is loaded with booze.
178
00:05:21,460 --> 00:05:24,427
Goddamn it, Frank,
eating your drinks?
179
00:05:24,495 --> 00:05:25,594
That is genius!
180
00:05:25,663 --> 00:05:26,362
Ow!
181
00:05:26,430 --> 00:05:27,162
What?
182
00:05:27,231 --> 00:05:30,231
What the... What the...
What is that?
183
00:05:30,300 --> 00:05:31,166
Oh, yeah.
184
00:05:31,235 --> 00:05:32,500
I got stuck with a needle.
185
00:05:32,569 --> 00:05:33,634
Yeah, that's a syringe.
186
00:05:33,703 --> 00:05:35,669
Be careful. They are everywhere.
187
00:05:35,738 --> 00:05:37,871
The beach is full of syringes.
188
00:05:37,940 --> 00:05:38,638
Why is that?
189
00:05:38,707 --> 00:05:40,840
Well, we're in the steroid
capital of the world, Frank.
190
00:05:40,909 --> 00:05:44,276
To be honest with you, as a man
who works very hard to maintain
191
00:05:44,345 --> 00:05:47,580
a certain level of physical excellence,
I find shortcuts insulting.
192
00:05:47,649 --> 00:05:49,682
Now give me a piece of ham now.
193
00:05:49,751 --> 00:05:50,750
Hey, check that out.
194
00:05:50,819 --> 00:05:53,086
What the hell's a
dog doing here?
195
00:05:53,154 --> 00:05:54,388
Hey, hey, get out of here!
196
00:05:54,456 --> 00:05:55,389
Get out of here!
197
00:05:55,457 --> 00:05:56,123
Get out of here!
198
00:05:56,191 --> 00:05:57,491
Goddamn dogs, I'm
telling you, dude.
199
00:05:57,559 --> 00:05:58,959
The were lurking before,
now they're swarming.
200
00:05:59,028 --> 00:06:02,229
I'm not sharing my
ham with no dogs.
201
00:06:02,298 --> 00:06:05,699
I got a great idea.
202
00:06:05,768 --> 00:06:12,406
Hey, warm sun, cool ocean breezes,
getting rip-shit on ham.
203
00:06:12,475 --> 00:06:15,009
Might you say
we're getting "hammered."
204
00:06:15,078 --> 00:06:18,713
Oh, nice one.
205
00:06:18,781 --> 00:06:19,847
This is a great idea, Frank.
206
00:06:19,916 --> 00:06:21,015
Great idea.
207
00:06:21,084 --> 00:06:22,850
This is 90-proof ham.
208
00:06:22,919 --> 00:06:25,152
Screw you mutts!
209
00:06:28,858 --> 00:06:30,925
Get out of here, you bitch!
210
00:06:30,994 --> 00:06:31,893
Come and get it.
211
00:06:31,961 --> 00:06:32,694
Stupid dogs.
212
00:06:32,762 --> 00:06:34,629
We outsmarted those dogs, Frank.
213
00:06:36,066 --> 00:06:38,067
Dude, this is the
boardwalk, man.
214
00:06:38,136 --> 00:06:39,035
This is amazing.
215
00:06:39,104 --> 00:06:41,371
Yeah, it's a little bit more desolate
than I was hoping it would be, but...
216
00:06:41,439 --> 00:06:42,138
Yeah, but that's okay.
217
00:06:42,207 --> 00:06:43,006
It's still really great.
218
00:06:43,074 --> 00:06:46,442
Oh, Charlie, there's all kinds of rides
and games and opportunities to win
219
00:06:46,511 --> 00:06:46,976
stuffed toys.
220
00:06:47,045 --> 00:06:49,879
Yeah, man, the boardwalk
is a blast, man.
221
00:06:49,948 --> 00:06:52,347
But it is under the boardwalk
where the action really happens.
222
00:06:52,416 --> 00:06:53,015
Trust me, pal.
223
00:06:53,083 --> 00:06:53,582
Oh, yeah?
224
00:06:53,650 --> 00:06:54,482
Yeah.
225
00:06:54,551 --> 00:06:56,051
Oh, what's down there?
226
00:06:56,119 --> 00:06:58,053
Oh, Charlie, come on.
227
00:06:58,121 --> 00:07:00,054
So under the boardwalk's
where it's at?
228
00:07:00,123 --> 00:07:01,055
Yeah, man.
229
00:07:01,123 --> 00:07:02,723
This is gonna knock
your socks off.
230
00:07:02,792 --> 00:07:05,325
You never know who you're going to run
into, what they're gonna be doing.
231
00:07:05,394 --> 00:07:06,493
You love the bridge, right?
232
00:07:06,562 --> 00:07:06,994
Yeah.
233
00:07:07,062 --> 00:07:08,429
This is a lot like being under
the bridge, I would think.
234
00:07:08,498 --> 00:07:09,296
It's way better than that.
235
00:07:09,365 --> 00:07:11,498
Under the boardwalk is
a magical place, man.
236
00:07:11,567 --> 00:07:13,867
I have a special place in my heart
'cause I had my first kiss down here.
237
00:07:13,936 --> 00:07:14,401
Mm-hmm.
238
00:07:14,470 --> 00:07:14,969
Did you?
239
00:07:15,037 --> 00:07:19,640
Oh, dude, all kinds of romantic
shit happens... Oh, God!
240
00:07:19,709 --> 00:07:21,375
Oh, God!
241
00:07:21,444 --> 00:07:22,609
Oh, no!
242
00:07:22,678 --> 00:07:24,378
No! No! No!
243
00:07:24,447 --> 00:07:25,646
No! What was that?!
244
00:07:25,715 --> 00:07:27,448
Two homeless guys
banging each other.
245
00:07:27,517 --> 00:07:28,916
I saw, but why?
246
00:07:28,985 --> 00:07:29,817
That's not magical.
247
00:07:29,886 --> 00:07:30,585
That's not romantic.
248
00:07:30,653 --> 00:07:31,519
That's your idea of romantic?
249
00:07:31,588 --> 00:07:32,220
No!
250
00:07:32,289 --> 00:07:34,323
There are other kinds of
romances that happen under here.
251
00:07:34,391 --> 00:07:36,158
I don't want to see
anything else like that.
252
00:07:36,227 --> 00:07:37,126
You know what, I'm out of here.
253
00:07:37,195 --> 00:07:37,994
'Cause you guys are perverted.
254
00:07:38,063 --> 00:07:38,695
You get out of here.
255
00:07:38,764 --> 00:07:39,696
You get out of here.
256
00:07:39,765 --> 00:07:41,064
You get out of here, Charlie.
257
00:07:41,133 --> 00:07:42,733
Son of a bitch.
258
00:07:51,148 --> 00:07:53,443
Aw!
259
00:07:55,579 --> 00:07:57,346
Where's the beach?
260
00:07:57,415 --> 00:07:58,314
Frank, wake up.
261
00:07:58,383 --> 00:07:59,214
What? What's the matter?
262
00:07:59,283 --> 00:08:01,850
Where's the beach?
263
00:08:02,214 --> 00:08:04,447
Uh, I don't know.
264
00:08:04,515 --> 00:08:06,915
We're in the middle
of the goddamn ocean!
265
00:08:06,984 --> 00:08:08,650
Yes, we are.
266
00:08:10,821 --> 00:08:11,920
What are we gonna do?
267
00:08:11,988 --> 00:08:15,156
Well, we're going to conk out
for a while and let the current
268
00:08:15,224 --> 00:08:17,491
gently roll us back to shore.
269
00:08:17,560 --> 00:08:21,161
Frank, the current is what brought
us out here in the first place.
270
00:08:21,230 --> 00:08:24,164
If anything, we should be paddling
against it to get back to the beach.
271
00:08:24,233 --> 00:08:26,100
I'm going to pretend
like I didn't hear that.
272
00:08:26,169 --> 00:08:29,269
Frank, Frank, we are no
longer in relaxing mode.
273
00:08:29,338 --> 00:08:30,905
We are now in survival mode.
274
00:08:30,973 --> 00:08:33,907
Will you stop being so dramatic?
275
00:08:33,976 --> 00:08:35,977
Wait a minute.
276
00:08:36,045 --> 00:08:37,611
Wait a minute.
277
00:08:37,680 --> 00:08:40,749
Where's the rum ham?
278
00:08:40,818 --> 00:08:42,084
Where's the rum...?
279
00:08:42,153 --> 00:08:43,619
Aw!
280
00:08:43,688 --> 00:08:45,020
Rum ham!
281
00:08:45,089 --> 00:08:46,422
No, Frank, stay in the boat.
282
00:08:46,491 --> 00:08:47,124
Rum ham!
283
00:08:47,192 --> 00:08:48,225
Frank, stay in the boat.
284
00:08:48,293 --> 00:08:50,093
I want rum ham!
285
00:08:50,162 --> 00:08:52,429
I'm sorry, rum ham.
286
00:08:52,498 --> 00:08:55,199
I'm sorry, rum ham.
287
00:08:55,267 --> 00:08:57,835
Oh, rum ham.
288
00:09:00,571 --> 00:09:03,205
Yeah, this is going
to be great, right?
289
00:09:03,274 --> 00:09:03,873
Of course it is.
290
00:09:03,941 --> 00:09:08,477
Nothing like some good, innocent, wholesome,
above-the-boardwalk fun to, uh,
291
00:09:08,545 --> 00:09:09,611
get us back on track.
292
00:09:09,679 --> 00:09:12,013
Yes. Take a step back
from the situation.
293
00:09:12,082 --> 00:09:13,781
Get a clearer perspective.
294
00:09:13,850 --> 00:09:15,583
Yeah, and then we'll plummet
20 stories and the rush will
295
00:09:15,652 --> 00:09:17,351
propel us forward into
an awesome evening.
296
00:09:17,420 --> 00:09:17,919
Yeah.
297
00:09:17,987 --> 00:09:20,922
And hopefully cleanse us of the horrifying
events that we've just witnessed.
298
00:09:20,990 --> 00:09:24,392
These beads are really
digging into my back.
299
00:09:24,461 --> 00:09:26,027
Wind... I don't know.
300
00:09:26,096 --> 00:09:27,529
I don't know if we should
have come back here.
301
00:09:27,597 --> 00:09:30,565
I think we made a mistake, because
we have so many memories... Oh, no.
302
00:09:30,634 --> 00:09:31,399
Is my hair stuck?
303
00:09:31,467 --> 00:09:32,299
Yeah.
304
00:09:32,368 --> 00:09:33,334
It feels it's.... Yeah?
305
00:09:33,402 --> 00:09:34,301
Oh, yeah.
306
00:09:34,370 --> 00:09:35,069
Well, get it.
307
00:09:35,137 --> 00:09:35,736
No.
308
00:09:35,805 --> 00:09:37,304
Get it out, because we're about to drop...
Get it!
309
00:09:37,373 --> 00:09:39,839
Stick your hand... You think I'm going
to stick my fingers into the machinery?
310
00:09:39,908 --> 00:09:41,641
Hey, hey, you down there.
311
00:09:41,710 --> 00:09:44,477
Do not make it go, because my
hair is stuck, and something
312
00:09:44,546 --> 00:09:45,411
terrible will happen.
313
00:09:45,480 --> 00:09:46,312
Oh, that's really in there.
314
00:09:46,381 --> 00:09:47,680
Oh, you idiot, stop the ride!
315
00:09:47,749 --> 00:09:51,883
Don't make it fall!
316
00:10:03,263 --> 00:10:05,565
Ow!
317
00:10:09,938 --> 00:10:11,372
Hey.
318
00:10:11,441 --> 00:10:12,507
How you holding up, sis?
319
00:10:12,575 --> 00:10:14,375
Not well, Dennis. Not well.
320
00:10:14,444 --> 00:10:18,345
Do you have any id how horrifying it was
to ride that back up to get my hair?
321
00:10:18,413 --> 00:10:20,380
Yeah, well, be thankful
you got it back.
322
00:10:20,449 --> 00:10:22,115
I just want to get my scalp
sewnack on and get the hell
323
00:10:22,183 --> 00:10:23,516
out of this miserable town.
324
00:10:23,584 --> 00:10:25,250
I'm starting to wonder what
the hell we ever saw in this
325
00:10:25,319 --> 00:10:26,685
place, you know what I mean?
326
00:10:26,754 --> 00:10:28,353
I mean, look at this girl.
327
00:10:28,421 --> 00:10:29,787
What's her story?
328
00:10:29,856 --> 00:10:31,789
She's got a decent
bone structure.
329
00:10:31,858 --> 00:10:33,290
She was probably very
pretty when she was young.
330
00:10:33,359 --> 00:10:33,957
Yeah.
331
00:10:34,026 --> 00:10:37,094
Probably spent her summers here, lounging
on the beach and scooping ice cream.
332
00:10:37,163 --> 00:10:40,063
But she didn't want her summers to end,
so she got herself a fake I.D. and a
333
00:10:40,132 --> 00:10:42,266
push-up bra and started hanging
out at the local bars.
334
00:10:42,334 --> 00:10:43,000
Right.
335
00:10:43,068 --> 00:10:45,836
Developed a nasty coke habit, 'cause
she loved the way it made her feel.
336
00:10:45,904 --> 00:10:46,770
Mm-hmm.
337
00:10:46,839 --> 00:10:50,741
Extreme highs gave way to extreme
lows and she fell into a depression.
338
00:10:50,809 --> 00:10:51,908
Had herself a kid.
339
00:10:51,977 --> 00:10:53,710
Thought it would give
her a sense of purpose.
340
00:10:53,779 --> 00:10:55,945
And it did, for a while, until
she started using again.
341
00:10:56,014 --> 00:10:56,779
Mm-hmm.
342
00:10:56,848 --> 00:10:58,915
And then social services came
knocking at the door, and now
343
00:10:58,984 --> 00:11:01,317
the kid lives upstate with his
grandparents, 'cause she can't
344
00:11:01,386 --> 00:11:02,685
take care of this kid.
345
00:11:02,754 --> 00:11:05,955
And here she is festering away
in a one-bedroom apartment
346
00:11:06,024 --> 00:11:08,724
waiting for the HIV
to turn into AIDS.
347
00:11:08,793 --> 00:11:12,628
And wondering what the hell...
You know I can hear you, right?
348
00:11:12,697 --> 00:11:13,429
Oh, sorry.
349
00:11:13,498 --> 00:11:14,664
We were just using you
as a metaphor, though.
350
00:11:14,732 --> 00:11:15,264
Yeah.
351
00:11:15,333 --> 00:11:16,966
We didn't mean
anything personal.
352
00:11:17,035 --> 00:11:18,902
Don't sweat it.
353
00:11:18,971 --> 00:11:20,304
You're not that far off.
354
00:11:20,372 --> 00:11:21,438
Hey.
355
00:11:21,507 --> 00:11:23,875
Hey, baby.
356
00:11:23,943 --> 00:11:25,376
Jesus, are you seeing this?
357
00:11:25,444 --> 00:11:26,076
Mm-hmm.
358
00:11:26,145 --> 00:11:28,379
God, even the doctors in
this town are drug dealers.
359
00:11:28,448 --> 00:11:29,113
Oh, hey, wait.
360
00:11:29,181 --> 00:11:29,947
What are you doing?
361
00:11:30,583 --> 00:11:31,215
Who are you?
362
00:11:31,284 --> 00:11:31,983
Where did you come from?
363
00:11:32,051 --> 00:11:32,550
Get out of here.
364
00:11:32,619 --> 00:11:33,251
Drop it.
365
00:11:33,319 --> 00:11:33,985
No. Goddamn it!
366
00:11:34,054 --> 00:11:35,853
Goddamn you!
367
00:11:35,922 --> 00:11:36,754
I hate this town, Dennis.
368
00:11:36,823 --> 00:11:37,588
I hate this town.
369
00:11:37,657 --> 00:11:39,257
Okay, okay, all right,
well calm down.
370
00:11:39,326 --> 00:11:40,091
It's understandable.
371
00:11:40,160 --> 00:11:41,392
You are missing a
piece of your scalp.
372
00:11:41,461 --> 00:11:42,193
Yeah.
373
00:11:42,262 --> 00:11:44,263
Sounds like you two
could use a break.
374
00:11:44,331 --> 00:11:46,331
Want to come party with
me and my friends?
375
00:11:46,400 --> 00:11:48,566
Yeah. Yes.
376
00:11:48,635 --> 00:11:50,568
Mm-hmm.
377
00:11:55,341 --> 00:11:56,708
I'm so thirsty.
378
00:11:56,777 --> 00:11:58,343
Gargle some more water, bitch.
379
00:11:58,412 --> 00:11:59,144
I've been gargling.
380
00:11:59,213 --> 00:12:00,679
Well, don't snap at me.
381
00:12:00,748 --> 00:12:02,113
Well, quit acting so bossy.
382
00:12:02,182 --> 00:12:04,649
Okay, you know what, guy,
we can't fight, all right?
383
00:12:04,718 --> 00:12:06,117
We're both very cranky.
384
00:12:06,186 --> 00:12:07,886
We haven't eaten in
a very long time.
385
00:12:07,955 --> 00:12:09,454
I'm starving.
386
00:12:09,523 --> 00:12:12,857
Okay, all right, look, maybe
I'll dive down there, I'll spear
387
00:12:12,926 --> 00:12:15,994
a tuna, I'll wrestle him
on board and we'll feast.
388
00:12:16,063 --> 00:12:17,729
Boom, let's eat.
389
00:12:17,798 --> 00:12:19,431
All right, give me the knife.
390
00:12:19,500 --> 00:12:21,333
I can't give you the knife.
391
00:12:21,402 --> 00:12:23,135
What? Why not?
392
00:12:23,203 --> 00:12:25,570
'Cause there may come a time
when difficult decisions must be
393
00:12:25,639 --> 00:12:28,507
made, and I'd rather be
the one with the knife.
394
00:12:28,576 --> 00:12:29,742
What difficult decisions?
395
00:12:29,810 --> 00:12:30,910
What are you talking about?
396
00:12:30,978 --> 00:12:33,946
You know, like things
you do to stay alive.
397
00:12:34,015 --> 00:12:38,116
Are you talking about killing
and eating me, Frank?
398
00:12:38,185 --> 00:12:40,718
All I'm saying is, that when you
go into survival mode, it's
399
00:12:40,787 --> 00:12:42,687
every man for himself.
400
00:12:42,755 --> 00:12:45,255
You seem like you're in
survival mode right now.
401
00:12:45,324 --> 00:12:49,393
Maybe I am, maybe
I ain't, rum ham.
402
00:12:49,461 --> 00:12:51,828
Did you just call me rum ham?
403
00:12:51,897 --> 00:12:54,898
Frank, Frank, we cannot be
talking about killing and eating
404
00:12:54,966 --> 00:12:56,166
each other already, okay?
405
00:12:56,235 --> 00:12:57,267
Tell that to the rum ham.
406
00:12:57,336 --> 00:12:58,769
Stop talking about
the goddamn rum ham.
407
00:12:58,838 --> 00:12:59,536
It should have been you!
408
00:12:59,605 --> 00:13:00,538
No!
409
00:13:00,606 --> 00:13:03,274
Jesus...
410
00:13:03,343 --> 00:13:04,576
Oh, no!
411
00:13:04,644 --> 00:13:05,110
Uh-oh.
412
00:13:05,179 --> 00:13:06,378
You see what you've done?
413
00:13:06,447 --> 00:13:09,181
You've murdered us both,
you son of a bitch.
414
00:13:09,250 --> 00:13:12,117
Oh, shit, what's that?
415
00:13:12,186 --> 00:13:13,452
It's a boat!
416
00:13:13,521 --> 00:13:14,186
It's a boat!
417
00:13:14,255 --> 00:13:15,054
We're saved!
418
00:13:16,924 --> 00:13:18,357
Is that an Italian flag?
419
00:13:18,426 --> 00:13:21,093
It's the Guidos.
420
00:13:21,162 --> 00:13:24,096
Guidos, we're here.
421
00:13:24,164 --> 00:13:27,132
Over here.
422
00:13:30,624 --> 00:13:32,158
Oh!
423
00:13:32,226 --> 00:13:33,992
No way.
424
00:13:34,061 --> 00:13:36,395
Charlie?
425
00:13:36,463 --> 00:13:39,097
Hey.
426
00:13:39,166 --> 00:13:41,866
Oh, my God, what are
you doing down here?
427
00:13:41,935 --> 00:13:43,901
Did you follow me all the
way to the Jersey Shore?
428
00:13:43,970 --> 00:13:45,903
No! No, I swear.
429
00:13:45,971 --> 00:13:48,071
I'm just out here...
but that's cool!
430
00:13:48,140 --> 00:13:50,207
Can you believe we're...
That's like destiny!
431
00:13:50,275 --> 00:13:53,243
What... What's in your hand?
432
00:13:53,312 --> 00:13:54,311
Something stupid I found.
433
00:13:54,380 --> 00:13:55,346
No big deal.
434
00:13:55,415 --> 00:13:57,548
Can I see it?
435
00:13:57,616 --> 00:14:00,217
Yeah.
436
00:14:00,286 --> 00:14:01,519
Wow.
437
00:14:01,587 --> 00:14:03,688
That's really beautiful.
438
00:14:04,825 --> 00:14:06,992
I'll tell you what, I mean...
I think that's a pretty rare
439
00:14:07,061 --> 00:14:09,728
one, but you can
keep it if you want.
440
00:14:09,797 --> 00:14:11,130
Thanks, Charlie.
441
00:14:11,199 --> 00:14:12,599
Sure.
442
00:14:15,236 --> 00:14:17,169
So you going to insult
me and walk away?
443
00:14:17,237 --> 00:14:19,637
Or, or what's going on here?
444
00:14:19,706 --> 00:14:22,806
No, I, um...
I don't, I don't know, you know?
445
00:14:22,875 --> 00:14:25,909
I love the beach so much,
and it's so beautiful.
446
00:14:25,977 --> 00:14:30,679
I could probably just hang
out here for a little while.
447
00:14:30,748 --> 00:14:34,015
Cool.
448
00:14:34,084 --> 00:14:36,051
Just don't go under
the boardwalk.
449
00:14:36,119 --> 00:14:38,753
Okay.
450
00:14:40,957 --> 00:14:42,457
Guys, this is Dennis and Dee.
451
00:14:42,526 --> 00:14:45,060
I told them they could
roll with us tonight.
452
00:14:45,129 --> 00:14:46,729
Yeah, uh, hi.
453
00:14:46,797 --> 00:14:50,632
Yeah, we're, uh, looking forward
to partying with you all tonight.
454
00:14:50,700 --> 00:14:52,401
Does Bobby know about this?
455
00:14:52,469 --> 00:14:53,968
Don't worry, they're cool.
456
00:14:54,037 --> 00:14:55,036
Yeah.
457
00:14:55,105 --> 00:14:57,705
So, uh... what are we getting
into tonight, you guys?
458
00:14:57,774 --> 00:14:58,706
Yeah!
459
00:14:58,775 --> 00:15:00,508
Just waiting for Bobby.
460
00:15:00,577 --> 00:15:02,510
Then we're gonna hit
the liquor store.
461
00:15:02,579 --> 00:15:03,411
All right, cool.
462
00:15:03,480 --> 00:15:04,913
Yeah, well, you can't have
a party without liquor.
463
00:15:04,981 --> 00:15:05,613
That's right.
464
00:15:05,682 --> 00:15:06,280
So yeah.
465
00:15:06,349 --> 00:15:07,281
Let's hit the liquor store.
466
00:15:09,318 --> 00:15:11,752
Who the hell
are these two?
467
00:15:11,821 --> 00:15:15,055
Well, you're Bobby, I guess.
468
00:15:15,124 --> 00:15:18,960
Uh, we are just new acquaintances
of your friend Stephanie over here.
469
00:15:19,029 --> 00:15:20,495
Harmless people.
470
00:15:20,564 --> 00:15:21,497
You guys cool?
471
00:15:21,565 --> 00:15:22,498
Yeah.
472
00:15:22,566 --> 00:15:26,201
Well, I hate to toot my own horn,
but I am pretty cool, Bobby.
473
00:15:27,638 --> 00:15:28,570
Hit that.
474
00:15:28,639 --> 00:15:31,540
Yeah.
475
00:15:31,609 --> 00:15:33,675
And I can tell by the way
you're staring at me that
476
00:15:33,744 --> 00:15:35,244
you're wondering
if I'm cool, too.
477
00:15:35,313 --> 00:15:36,212
Ooh.
478
00:15:36,280 --> 00:15:39,048
I'm just going to go ahead and nip
that in the bud right now, so...
479
00:15:40,785 --> 00:15:42,351
Oh, shit.
480
00:15:42,420 --> 00:15:43,586
That does not taste like weed.
481
00:15:43,655 --> 00:15:44,587
It burns a lot.
482
00:15:44,656 --> 00:15:45,722
It's angel dust.
483
00:15:45,790 --> 00:15:48,591
Angel... Dust.
484
00:15:48,659 --> 00:15:50,593
Embrace the night.
485
00:15:56,699 --> 00:15:57,632
What's over there?
486
00:15:57,701 --> 00:16:00,702
♪ Just can't seem to get
my mind off of you ♪
487
00:16:04,141 --> 00:16:05,640
Beer, beer, beer, beer!
488
00:16:05,709 --> 00:16:07,642
All right, you guys
ready to get it?
489
00:16:07,711 --> 00:16:08,643
Yes, yes!
490
00:16:08,712 --> 00:16:10,345
Let's go, let's go, let's go!
491
00:16:10,413 --> 00:16:11,946
No!
492
00:16:12,015 --> 00:16:13,148
Yeah!
493
00:16:13,216 --> 00:16:14,282
Wha...?
494
00:16:14,351 --> 00:16:15,650
What's happening?
495
00:16:15,719 --> 00:16:16,751
What's happening?
496
00:16:20,590 --> 00:16:27,862
♪ Vacation all I ever wanted vacation,
had to get away
497
00:16:27,931 --> 00:16:29,965
♪ Vacation meant to be spent alone ♪
498
00:16:30,033 --> 00:16:30,932
Hi!
499
00:16:36,907 --> 00:16:37,939
Drive!
500
00:16:38,008 --> 00:16:38,840
Drive now!
501
00:16:38,909 --> 00:16:40,175
You! Drive!
502
00:16:40,244 --> 00:16:41,176
Drive!
503
00:16:41,245 --> 00:16:42,310
Drive!
504
00:16:42,379 --> 00:16:44,646
Drive!
505
00:16:47,585 --> 00:16:48,517
Thanks, man.
506
00:16:48,586 --> 00:16:53,055
Thanks, bro.
507
00:16:53,124 --> 00:16:53,956
Hurry it up.
508
00:16:54,025 --> 00:16:54,991
Hurry up!
509
00:16:55,059 --> 00:16:58,728
Hurry up!
510
00:16:59,898 --> 00:17:00,830
Oh, my God!
511
00:17:00,899 --> 00:17:01,832
Shut her up!
512
00:17:01,900 --> 00:17:02,833
You pick him up.
513
00:17:02,901 --> 00:17:03,500
Okay!
514
00:17:03,569 --> 00:17:04,167
Pick him up.
515
00:17:04,236 --> 00:17:04,835
Pick him up?
516
00:17:04,904 --> 00:17:06,771
Go get him!
517
00:17:08,508 --> 00:17:11,843
♪ Vacation, all I ever wanted
Vacation, had to get away ♪
518
00:17:11,911 --> 00:17:13,844
Rum ham!
519
00:17:18,916 --> 00:17:22,718
♪ Vacation, all I ever
wanted Vacation... ♪
520
00:17:22,787 --> 00:17:24,687
Dig, come on, dig!
521
00:17:25,756 --> 00:17:26,588
Dig! Hurry up!
522
00:17:26,657 --> 00:17:27,355
Dig! Shut up!
523
00:17:27,424 --> 00:17:28,356
Shut up and dig!
524
00:17:30,427 --> 00:17:31,359
Bobby!
525
00:17:31,428 --> 00:17:32,394
Shoot 'em!
526
00:17:33,464 --> 00:17:34,797
Shoot 'em!
527
00:17:34,866 --> 00:17:42,572
♪ ... had to get away, vacation,
meant to be spent alone
528
00:17:42,641 --> 00:17:50,114
Vacation, all I ever wanted ♪
Vacation, had to get away Vacation,
529
00:17:50,183 --> 00:17:52,951
meant to be spent alone... ♪
530
00:18:01,894 --> 00:18:03,761
Oh, my God, Charlie!
531
00:18:03,829 --> 00:18:04,761
Hey.
532
00:18:04,830 --> 00:18:05,762
What a night.
533
00:18:06,732 --> 00:18:09,365
What the...
Did you rape me last night?
534
00:18:09,434 --> 00:18:11,367
What? No.
535
00:18:11,435 --> 00:18:12,368
Gross, no!
536
00:18:12,436 --> 00:18:17,507
Then... Okay, why am I waking up
next to you on a deserted beach?
537
00:18:17,576 --> 00:18:19,509
'Cause we fell asleep
here last night.
538
00:18:19,578 --> 00:18:21,011
What's going on with you?
539
00:18:21,080 --> 00:18:25,416
Oh, my God. I was...
I was on Ecstasy last night, Charlie.
540
00:18:25,484 --> 00:18:27,719
You have to tell me
everything that happened.
541
00:18:27,787 --> 00:18:29,788
Oh!
542
00:18:29,856 --> 00:18:31,990
Boy, you're really
off the wagon, huh?
543
00:18:32,059 --> 00:18:34,026
Drinking, drugs... Oh, my God.
544
00:18:34,095 --> 00:18:35,561
Well, it was a cool night.
545
00:18:35,630 --> 00:18:38,464
I mean, we laughed, we collected
sea specimens, we drank some
546
00:18:38,532 --> 00:18:41,367
ocean, you got a little sick
from drinking the ocean.
547
00:18:41,436 --> 00:18:42,368
I loved it, though.
548
00:18:42,437 --> 00:18:44,770
That sounds really
weird and gross.
549
00:18:44,839 --> 00:18:46,939
Oh, really?
550
00:18:47,007 --> 00:18:48,941
Well, I suppose now you think
this is weird and gross.
551
00:18:49,009 --> 00:18:51,209
Oh my God, Charlie, come on!
552
00:18:51,278 --> 00:18:53,378
What?
553
00:18:53,446 --> 00:18:55,380
Hang on a second,
where you going?
554
00:18:55,449 --> 00:18:56,548
Uh, let's see.
555
00:18:56,617 --> 00:18:59,284
Last night I lived out one
of my actual nightmares.
556
00:18:59,353 --> 00:19:01,286
So I'm going to go,
and take a shower.
557
00:19:01,355 --> 00:19:02,287
Well, hang on.
558
00:19:02,356 --> 00:19:04,256
Hang on a second.
559
00:19:04,325 --> 00:19:06,225
I suppose you want this back.
560
00:19:06,294 --> 00:19:07,226
What is that?
561
00:19:07,295 --> 00:19:08,227
That's a jewel you gave me.
562
00:19:08,296 --> 00:19:10,129
You said you wanted
me to have it.
563
00:19:10,198 --> 00:19:13,032
Charlie, that's a piece
of a broken glass bottle.
564
00:19:13,101 --> 00:19:14,267
All right.
565
00:19:14,335 --> 00:19:16,269
Well, maybe I'll see you
Friday or something.
566
00:19:16,338 --> 00:19:17,270
No!
567
00:19:17,338 --> 00:19:19,538
No!
568
00:19:19,607 --> 00:19:20,706
Okay.
569
00:19:20,775 --> 00:19:22,841
Hmm.
570
00:19:22,910 --> 00:19:25,411
I guess that's just summer love.
571
00:19:25,479 --> 00:19:27,546
Crazy.
572
00:19:27,615 --> 00:19:30,115
Bro, our night was
way more amazing.
573
00:19:30,184 --> 00:19:31,016
And it actually happened.
574
00:19:31,085 --> 00:19:32,518
What do you mean, it
actually happened?
575
00:19:32,587 --> 00:19:33,352
Why do you keep saying that?
576
00:19:33,420 --> 00:19:34,953
You don't think I spent the
night with the waitress?
577
00:19:35,022 --> 00:19:35,620
No!
578
00:19:35,689 --> 00:19:37,022
Then where'd I get this, dude?
579
00:19:37,090 --> 00:19:37,722
Where'd I get that?
580
00:19:37,791 --> 00:19:40,725
I assume you got it out of the trash, or
dug it out of a storm drain somewhere.
581
00:19:40,794 --> 00:19:44,495
I don't believe you're not...
Whoa! Here they come.
582
00:19:44,564 --> 00:19:46,497
Okay. All right.
583
00:19:46,566 --> 00:19:47,498
Everyone get in the car!
584
00:19:47,567 --> 00:19:48,166
Go, let's go!
585
00:19:48,234 --> 00:19:48,866
Get in the car!
586
00:19:48,935 --> 00:19:49,767
Come on, come on, come on!
587
00:19:49,836 --> 00:19:50,988
Guys, you will not believe
the night we had!
588
00:19:51,108 --> 00:19:53,614
I don't care, there is no meaning
to life anymore.
589
00:19:53,734 --> 00:19:55,587
It takes a classy man
to admit when he was wrong.
590
00:19:55,707 --> 00:19:58,223
- And I was wrong. I love the Jersey Shore.
- Oh, you love it?
591
00:19:58,343 --> 00:20:03,200
Oh, you love it so much here, get in the
goddamn car, you fat fat ass, fat fat ass.
592
00:20:03,320 --> 00:20:05,794
***
593
00:20:05,914 --> 00:20:07,849
Oh, man, they talk awesome.
594
00:20:07,969 --> 00:20:10,360
I don't know why these guys get
such a bad rep. It's pretty cool.
595
00:20:10,480 --> 00:20:11,849
Let me tell you something, Mac.
596
00:20:11,969 --> 00:20:15,300
There are far worse people in Jersey Shore
than the cast of The Jersey Shore.
597
00:20:15,420 --> 00:20:18,767
It's a horrible town. It's a horrible town
filled with horrible people.
598
00:20:18,887 --> 00:20:21,966
I don't know about that.
I think it's a magical town.
599
00:20:22,086 --> 00:20:23,963
Hell yeah.
600
00:20:24,787 --> 00:20:26,636
Beautiful magical town.
601
00:20:28,674 --> 00:20:39,106
Sync & corrected by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com