1 00:02:05,083 --> 00:02:08,211 MAN: The defeat and breakup of the Soviet empire, 2 00:02:08,295 --> 00:02:11,172 culminating in the crumbling of the Berlin Wall, 3 00:02:11,256 --> 00:02:14,425 is one of the great events of world history. 4 00:02:14,510 --> 00:02:16,385 There were many heroes in this battle, 5 00:02:16,470 --> 00:02:20,556 but to Charlie Wilson must go this special recognition. 6 00:02:21,934 --> 00:02:25,978 Just 13 years ago, the Soviet Army appeared to be invincible. 7 00:02:26,897 --> 00:02:29,982 But Charlie, undeterred, 8 00:02:30,067 --> 00:02:34,946 engineered a lethal body blow that weakened the Communist empire. 9 00:02:35,030 --> 00:02:40,993 Without Charlie, history would be hugely and sadly different. 10 00:02:41,745 --> 00:02:43,246 And so, for the first time, 11 00:02:43,330 --> 00:02:47,708 a civilian is being given our highest recognition, 12 00:02:47,793 --> 00:02:49,794 that of Honored Colleague. 13 00:02:50,462 --> 00:02:53,631 Ladies and gentlemen of the Clandestine Services, 14 00:02:53,882 --> 00:02:55,967 Congressman Charles Wilson. 15 00:03:19,283 --> 00:03:20,468 (SOUL MUSIC PLAYING ON STEREO) 16 00:03:20,492 --> 00:03:22,451 - It'd be like Dallas. - CRYSTAL: That's right. 17 00:03:22,536 --> 00:03:25,246 - You know what I'm saying? - Like Dallas but set in Washington. 18 00:03:25,330 --> 00:03:27,170 - Yeah. - And you should say it just like that. 19 00:03:27,207 --> 00:03:28,707 - When I pitch it. - You should say it just... 20 00:03:28,709 --> 00:03:31,294 "Oh, this is fucking great." You should say it just like that. 21 00:03:31,378 --> 00:03:33,045 Dallas set in Washington D.C. 22 00:03:33,130 --> 00:03:35,464 You know, with the intrigue and the power plays 23 00:03:35,549 --> 00:03:38,634 - and the overt natural sex. - The glamour, the power. 24 00:03:38,719 --> 00:03:40,655 - CRYSTAL: Do you know what I'm saying? - PAUL: It's fucking Dallas. 25 00:03:40,679 --> 00:03:41,929 CRYSTAL: Or, or Falcon Crest. 26 00:03:42,014 --> 00:03:44,265 - Yes. - That's set in Washington. 27 00:03:44,349 --> 00:03:45,933 Say it to Charlie like that. 28 00:03:46,018 --> 00:03:49,145 The resistance fighters disguised us as one of them. 29 00:03:49,396 --> 00:03:50,646 Charlie. 30 00:03:51,231 --> 00:03:52,273 (CLEARS THROAT) 31 00:03:52,357 --> 00:03:55,151 It's like Dallas but in Washington. 32 00:03:55,235 --> 00:03:57,403 - With Crystal in the starring role. - Yeah. 33 00:03:57,487 --> 00:03:59,947 You tell me when to watch. I'll make sure I'm home. 34 00:04:00,032 --> 00:04:01,616 You don't think I can make it happen? 35 00:04:01,700 --> 00:04:03,784 I don't know anything about how any of that works. 36 00:04:03,869 --> 00:04:05,995 - I do. - You said that you would listen to him. 37 00:04:06,079 --> 00:04:07,246 That's why we're here. 38 00:04:07,331 --> 00:04:09,790 Do they routinely give starring roles on network programs 39 00:04:09,875 --> 00:04:12,084 to people who haven't acted professionally before? 40 00:04:12,169 --> 00:04:14,378 She was just on the fucking cover of Playboy, Charlie. 41 00:04:14,463 --> 00:04:16,172 Well, I guess that's just the same thing. 42 00:04:16,256 --> 00:04:18,007 Would you take this seriously, please? 43 00:04:18,091 --> 00:04:20,361 I am taking it seriously, hon, but can you all tell me something? 44 00:04:20,385 --> 00:04:22,303 What is... What is Dan Rather wearing right now? 45 00:04:22,387 --> 00:04:23,930 - What? - Dan Rather. 46 00:04:24,014 --> 00:04:26,015 - What is he wearing? - You're watching TV? 47 00:04:26,099 --> 00:04:28,517 - Why hasn't he shaved? - Well, who gives a damn? 48 00:04:28,602 --> 00:04:31,938 Excuse me! Hey! Excuse me, could you turn that up? 49 00:04:32,022 --> 00:04:34,899 Could you just turn up the volume on the TV? 50 00:04:34,983 --> 00:04:36,442 Oh, I'm completely high. 51 00:04:36,526 --> 00:04:38,069 Yeah. Okay. 52 00:04:38,153 --> 00:04:42,698 Still, could you just grab the remote there and find the volume button? 53 00:04:42,783 --> 00:04:44,325 Charlie, are we gonna do business? 54 00:04:44,409 --> 00:04:47,495 Dan Rather is wearing a turban, Paul. Don't you want to know why? 55 00:04:47,579 --> 00:04:50,873 He's doing a thing from India. 56 00:04:50,958 --> 00:04:52,375 No, that's Afghanistan. 57 00:04:52,459 --> 00:04:53,709 - Got it. - Appreciate it. 58 00:04:53,794 --> 00:04:55,271 WOMAN TRANSLATOR: We got it... We captured it from the Afghan, 59 00:04:55,295 --> 00:04:56,397 - the Afghan army. - Thank you. 60 00:04:56,421 --> 00:04:58,024 Does he have ammunition for this? He has three. 61 00:04:58,048 --> 00:05:00,007 But does he have ammunition? A lot of ammunition? 62 00:05:00,092 --> 00:05:01,759 Well, he's talking about the mujahideen. 63 00:05:01,843 --> 00:05:04,197 - WOMAN: No, we don't, we didn't capture any. - PAUL: Priests? 64 00:05:04,221 --> 00:05:07,807 No, mujahideen means, like, holy warriors. 65 00:05:07,891 --> 00:05:10,476 - Priests! - How the hell am I supposed to know? 66 00:05:10,560 --> 00:05:11,686 Paul. 67 00:05:12,270 --> 00:05:16,273 And he was... He is saying that, you know, America seems to be asleep. 68 00:05:16,358 --> 00:05:19,402 It doesn't seem to realize that if Afghanistan goes 69 00:05:19,486 --> 00:05:21,529 and the Russians go over to the Gulf, 70 00:05:21,613 --> 00:05:26,242 that in a very short time, it's going to be the turn of the United States as well. 71 00:05:26,326 --> 00:05:28,577 DAN: I'm sure he knows that in Vietnam... 72 00:05:28,662 --> 00:05:29,954 Excuse me. 73 00:05:30,956 --> 00:05:33,416 We were just wondering what you do for a living. 74 00:05:33,500 --> 00:05:36,127 I'm not a police officer, if that's what you're asking. 75 00:05:36,211 --> 00:05:39,797 No. We just... We don't meet a lot of guys here who both, you know, 76 00:05:39,881 --> 00:05:42,717 - know about the world and like to party. - (CLEARS THROAT) No. 77 00:05:42,801 --> 00:05:45,469 I'm a member of the U.S. House of Representatives. 78 00:05:45,554 --> 00:05:48,305 - I'm sorry? - I'm a Congressman. 79 00:05:48,390 --> 00:05:52,309 - Are you kidding? - No. No, I'm absolutely serious. 80 00:05:52,394 --> 00:05:56,230 I'm Charlie Wilson. I represent the Texas Second Congressional. 81 00:05:57,941 --> 00:06:00,609 Texas. And this is Crystal Lee. 82 00:06:00,694 --> 00:06:02,737 This is Paul Brown. What are your names? 83 00:06:02,821 --> 00:06:03,904 - Stacey. - Stacey. 84 00:06:03,989 --> 00:06:06,907 - Kelly. - Kelly. Well, it's nice to meet you both. 85 00:06:06,992 --> 00:06:12,163 If you are a Congressman should you be in here with strippers and blow? 86 00:06:12,247 --> 00:06:14,665 Hey, I'm not a stripper. 87 00:06:14,750 --> 00:06:17,293 - I am a stripper. - I'm a stripper. 88 00:06:17,377 --> 00:06:19,336 Yes, see, they were talking about themselves. 89 00:06:19,421 --> 00:06:24,508 You know, you do have a point there. I really should get going. A little pruney. 90 00:06:24,593 --> 00:06:27,636 Look, Charlie, I need $29,000 to make it happen. 91 00:06:27,721 --> 00:06:30,473 And you know I can make it happen, and you know you want in on this. 92 00:06:30,557 --> 00:06:33,851 Hey, who wants to take a ride with me to the airport? 93 00:06:33,935 --> 00:06:35,102 - Oh, me! - Paul? 94 00:06:35,187 --> 00:06:36,854 Okay. 95 00:06:36,938 --> 00:06:39,482 DAN ON TV: A holy war against the Soviets. 96 00:06:39,566 --> 00:06:43,027 A war they say that, if they get weapons, 97 00:06:43,111 --> 00:06:46,739 from us or anyone else in the free world, they will win. 98 00:06:46,823 --> 00:06:48,115 (MAN SHOUTING ON SCREEN) 99 00:06:50,035 --> 00:06:52,828 PAUL: Yeah, I'm with Congressman Charles Wilson and Crystal Lee. 100 00:06:52,913 --> 00:06:54,640 - CHARLIE: I wish he wouldn't do that. - From Texas. 101 00:06:54,664 --> 00:06:56,384 Has there ever been a show about Washington? 102 00:06:56,458 --> 00:06:57,894 - I don't think there has. - Me, neither. 103 00:06:57,918 --> 00:07:00,544 Thank you. We got the suite another night. Comped. 104 00:07:00,629 --> 00:07:02,379 - DRIVER: Should I go back? - No. 105 00:07:02,464 --> 00:07:03,983 - You can't stay another night? - No. No. 106 00:07:04,007 --> 00:07:06,383 - Stay another night. - I can't. I have a vote. 107 00:07:06,468 --> 00:07:07,718 What, an important one? 108 00:07:07,803 --> 00:07:09,720 - Yes. - What is it? 109 00:07:09,805 --> 00:07:13,516 Well, it's a non-binding resolution expressing the sense of the Congress 110 00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:16,644 that the Department of Defense should continue to exercise its authority 111 00:07:16,728 --> 00:07:19,063 to support the Boy Scouts of America. 112 00:07:19,147 --> 00:07:20,314 Are you fucking kidding me? 113 00:07:21,108 --> 00:07:23,484 Come on, Charlie, call, raise or fold. 114 00:07:23,568 --> 00:07:24,802 I want to get an answer on this thing 115 00:07:24,820 --> 00:07:27,863 - that Crystal and I want to do. - First off, I'd appreciate it 116 00:07:27,948 --> 00:07:30,074 if you didn't throw my name around quite so much, 117 00:07:30,158 --> 00:07:33,619 'cause, from time to time, I use it myself, and I need it in good condition. 118 00:07:33,703 --> 00:07:35,871 Second, I'm from Lufkin, Texas. 119 00:07:35,956 --> 00:07:37,809 I'm the son of an accountant for a timber company. 120 00:07:37,833 --> 00:07:41,710 I take home about 700 bucks a week, and I pay alimony, 121 00:07:41,795 --> 00:07:45,756 so the idea that I got $29,000 in the bank is pretty hysterical. 122 00:07:46,258 --> 00:07:47,925 That said, I love your idea. 123 00:07:48,009 --> 00:07:49,927 - Crys, I'll call you this week. - Okay. 124 00:07:50,011 --> 00:07:51,095 All right. 125 00:07:51,179 --> 00:07:55,266 Stacey, Kelly, nice to meet you both. Are you Nevada residents? 126 00:07:55,350 --> 00:07:56,869 - BOTH: Yeah. - Well, don't forget to vote. 127 00:07:56,893 --> 00:07:58,686 - Bye. We love you! - We love you! 128 00:07:58,770 --> 00:08:00,813 Oh, it helps not to know me. Oh! That is for you. 129 00:08:00,897 --> 00:08:02,106 - Thank you, sir. - Thank you. 130 00:08:02,190 --> 00:08:03,607 - Bye! - Bye, Charlie. 131 00:08:03,692 --> 00:08:05,693 CHARLIE: I love Las Vegas! 132 00:08:06,278 --> 00:08:08,840 - CHARLIE: All right, what else? - That Dairy Queen guy, Larry Liddle, 133 00:08:08,864 --> 00:08:10,281 - is sitting in your office. - Hey. 134 00:08:10,365 --> 00:08:11,907 Yeah, I told him he could come in. 135 00:08:11,992 --> 00:08:13,784 He wants to talk to you about a crèche. 136 00:08:13,869 --> 00:08:15,786 What, a nativity scene with baby Jesus? 137 00:08:15,871 --> 00:08:18,099 Yeah, it's on public property, and the city's making him move it. 138 00:08:18,123 --> 00:08:19,665 Shit. I thought he was just coming in 139 00:08:19,749 --> 00:08:21,644 - to get his picture took, you know? - Congressman. 140 00:08:21,668 --> 00:08:22,770 - Yeah? - You're exactly who I need to speak to. 141 00:08:22,794 --> 00:08:23,961 - You have a moment? - Sure. 142 00:08:24,045 --> 00:08:25,838 - Tip asked me to talk to you. - Okay. 143 00:08:25,922 --> 00:08:27,798 He wanted me to talk to you about John Murtha. 144 00:08:27,883 --> 00:08:30,467 - Go ahead. - The prosecutor's gonna go after him. 145 00:08:30,552 --> 00:08:31,992 Well, they ain't gonna find anything. 146 00:08:32,053 --> 00:08:34,305 John Murtha's as clean as my mother's kitchen floor. 147 00:08:34,389 --> 00:08:37,391 Yeah, but Tip would like to put you on the Ethics Committee just the same. 148 00:08:37,475 --> 00:08:39,185 - You're kidding. - No. 149 00:08:39,269 --> 00:08:41,395 Well, Jesus, Donnelly, everyone in town knows 150 00:08:41,479 --> 00:08:42,874 I'm on the other side of that issue. 151 00:08:42,898 --> 00:08:44,982 - Ethics? - Yeah! 152 00:08:45,066 --> 00:08:47,943 Well, the Speaker would like to put you on the committee anyway. 153 00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:51,530 Okay. Well, if anyone asks what the hell I'm doing on the Ethics Committee, 154 00:08:51,615 --> 00:08:54,325 we'll just tell them I like chasing women and drinking whiskey 155 00:08:54,409 --> 00:08:56,535 and the Speaker felt we were underrepresented. 156 00:08:56,620 --> 00:08:58,287 - One man, one vote. - Exactly. 157 00:08:58,371 --> 00:08:59,765 Tip's gonna want to return the favor. 158 00:08:59,789 --> 00:09:01,707 - Tuesday, right? - That is Tuesday, yes. 159 00:09:01,791 --> 00:09:04,562 So if anything comes up that you'd like me to speak with him about, please... 160 00:09:04,586 --> 00:09:05,669 Yes. 161 00:09:06,129 --> 00:09:07,171 Yes! 162 00:09:07,714 --> 00:09:10,341 I'd like to be on the Board of Directors of the Kennedy Center. 163 00:09:10,467 --> 00:09:11,508 - Charlie. - I'm sorry? 164 00:09:11,593 --> 00:09:14,553 Turns out Congress appoints the Board of Directors of the Kennedy Center. 165 00:09:14,638 --> 00:09:18,557 It's a great place to take a date, and I can never afford the tickets. 166 00:09:18,642 --> 00:09:20,517 - Consider it done. - Excellent. 167 00:09:21,436 --> 00:09:22,519 Go vote. 168 00:09:22,604 --> 00:09:25,564 Another few minutes. Let's see what's on the wires. 169 00:09:25,649 --> 00:09:28,359 Why can't you wait for newspapers like everybody else? 170 00:09:28,443 --> 00:09:30,724 'Cause I think it's productive to know today's news today. 171 00:09:30,779 --> 00:09:33,322 And it makes me one day smarter than you, which I enjoy as well. 172 00:09:33,406 --> 00:09:34,865 I know you do. 173 00:09:34,950 --> 00:09:36,430 You don't think that's a little crazy? 174 00:09:36,493 --> 00:09:38,661 Pan Am and Eastern are lowering their fares. 175 00:09:38,745 --> 00:09:40,579 - 'Cause of Braniff. - What's a little crazy? 176 00:09:40,664 --> 00:09:42,141 Joining the Board of the Kennedy Center 177 00:09:42,165 --> 00:09:44,143 so you can get free tickets to the Royal Ballet of... 178 00:09:44,167 --> 00:09:45,251 - Hold on. - What? 179 00:09:45,335 --> 00:09:47,044 AP story out of Kabul. 180 00:09:47,128 --> 00:09:48,504 Uzbekistan? 181 00:09:48,713 --> 00:09:50,089 Afghanistan. 182 00:09:50,882 --> 00:09:54,385 Russia, Afghanistan, Pakistan, Iran, Iraq, Kuwait, Saudi Arabia, 183 00:09:54,469 --> 00:09:56,303 Jordan, Israel, Egypt. 184 00:09:59,266 --> 00:10:01,308 Jim Van Wagenen's our point man on black apropos 185 00:10:01,393 --> 00:10:02,726 for the Defense Subcommittee? 186 00:10:02,811 --> 00:10:03,894 Yeah. 187 00:10:03,979 --> 00:10:06,188 Have him come to my office as soon as possible. 188 00:10:06,273 --> 00:10:07,792 - How am I voting on this? - BONNIE: Yes. 189 00:10:07,816 --> 00:10:08,941 - You sure? - Yes. 190 00:10:09,025 --> 00:10:10,526 The Boy Scouts? 191 00:10:10,610 --> 00:10:13,195 Jim Van Wagenen. Get him and show him that wire story. 192 00:10:13,280 --> 00:10:15,240 - Yes, sir. - You are the man I wanted to talk to. 193 00:10:16,992 --> 00:10:20,035 The Congressman will be here in a moment. He's just coming up from a vote. 194 00:10:20,120 --> 00:10:22,705 - I'm sure it's an important one. - No. Not really. 195 00:10:23,456 --> 00:10:25,142 SUZANNE: So, Marla, can you fit this into his schedule next week? 196 00:10:25,166 --> 00:10:26,292 (PHONE RINGING) 197 00:10:26,376 --> 00:10:28,229 RECEPTIONIST: Charlie Wilson's office. Good morning. 198 00:10:28,253 --> 00:10:29,295 The third... 199 00:10:29,379 --> 00:10:31,588 It is? How are you? 200 00:10:31,673 --> 00:10:33,025 BONNIE: Suzanne, can you help me with this? 201 00:10:33,049 --> 00:10:34,652 - SUZANNE: Okay. I'll be right back. - RECEPTIONIST: I'll have him do it. 202 00:10:34,676 --> 00:10:35,759 Okay, bye-bye. 203 00:10:35,844 --> 00:10:37,386 - LARRY: Miss? - Yes, sir? 204 00:10:37,470 --> 00:10:41,724 It seems to me, looking around, that it's almost all women working here, 205 00:10:41,808 --> 00:10:44,184 and that they're all very pretty. 206 00:10:44,436 --> 00:10:46,603 - Is that common? - (LAUGHS) Well, 207 00:10:46,688 --> 00:10:48,897 Congressman Wilson, he has an expression. 208 00:10:48,982 --> 00:10:53,610 He says, "You can teach them to type, but you can't teach them to grow tits." 209 00:10:53,862 --> 00:10:55,237 Well, that's charming. 210 00:10:55,322 --> 00:10:56,989 - Larry! - Congressman! 211 00:10:57,073 --> 00:11:00,909 No, no, no. For $5,000 every two years you get to call me Charlie. 212 00:11:00,994 --> 00:11:04,830 And for 10,000, you can call me Betty Sue and I'll clean out your rain gutters. 213 00:11:04,914 --> 00:11:05,956 This is my daughter, Jane. 214 00:11:06,041 --> 00:11:09,020 - Well, now I remember Jane. Two-L at SMU. - Charlie Wilson's office. Good morning. 215 00:11:09,044 --> 00:11:10,627 Welcome to the United States Congress. 216 00:11:10,712 --> 00:11:13,047 Hey, I'm gonna talk to your daddy for a couple of seconds. 217 00:11:13,131 --> 00:11:15,299 Larry, can we get you a drink? 218 00:11:15,383 --> 00:11:18,802 - It's 10:00 in the morning. - Well, fair enough, I guess. 219 00:11:19,763 --> 00:11:21,138 Grab a seat. 220 00:11:21,890 --> 00:11:24,725 Now, this situation with the crèche, I want to know all about it. 221 00:11:24,809 --> 00:11:25,934 Well, sir, 222 00:11:26,019 --> 00:11:27,061 (CLEARS THROAT) 223 00:11:27,520 --> 00:11:30,522 every single year since the world was young, 224 00:11:31,316 --> 00:11:35,194 the firehouse in the Nacogdoches Township has displayed a crèche. 225 00:11:35,278 --> 00:11:38,697 Now, the ACLU has filed suit against the township 226 00:11:38,782 --> 00:11:42,284 for displaying a religious symbol on public property. 227 00:11:42,369 --> 00:11:44,495 It's Christmas time. It's a crèche. 228 00:11:44,579 --> 00:11:47,331 I could understand if we were in gosh-darn Scarsdale, 229 00:11:47,415 --> 00:11:51,001 but this is east Texas, and I want to know who we're offending. 230 00:11:51,086 --> 00:11:52,920 Except two lawyers from the ACLU. 231 00:11:53,004 --> 00:11:56,423 That is a terribly interesting and complicated question. 232 00:11:56,508 --> 00:11:58,342 Let me make this suggestion, though. 233 00:11:58,426 --> 00:12:01,220 There's a church about a block and a half 234 00:12:01,304 --> 00:12:04,223 from that firehouse, First Baptist Church of Nacogdoches. 235 00:12:04,307 --> 00:12:05,933 They've got a beautiful rolling lawn 236 00:12:06,017 --> 00:12:08,852 - out there in front. - No, no. This is a Christian country, Charlie, 237 00:12:08,937 --> 00:12:10,896 - founded on Christian values. - Sure. 238 00:12:10,980 --> 00:12:13,023 We welcome other faiths to worship as they wish, 239 00:12:13,108 --> 00:12:15,484 but when you can't put a nativity scene 240 00:12:15,568 --> 00:12:18,654 in front of a firehouse at Christmas time in Nacogdoches Township, 241 00:12:18,738 --> 00:12:20,155 something's gone terribly wrong. 242 00:12:20,240 --> 00:12:22,324 Well, that's not really true, Larry. 243 00:12:22,409 --> 00:12:24,993 You could move that crèche over to that church 244 00:12:25,078 --> 00:12:27,329 - and everything's just fine. - That's not the point! 245 00:12:27,414 --> 00:12:30,541 Okay. Why don't we just start back at the beginning? 246 00:12:30,625 --> 00:12:31,792 What can I do for you? 247 00:12:31,876 --> 00:12:34,105 You can intervene in the case against the crèche committee. 248 00:12:34,129 --> 00:12:35,295 Intervene? How? 249 00:12:35,380 --> 00:12:38,257 - You appointed the judge. - I don't appoint judges. 250 00:12:38,341 --> 00:12:41,301 I just made a recommendation to the President. 251 00:12:41,386 --> 00:12:42,655 I think you and I both know what that means. 252 00:12:42,679 --> 00:12:43,762 (KNOCK ON DOOR) 253 00:12:43,847 --> 00:12:46,682 I cannot just call up a judge and tell him what to do. 254 00:12:46,766 --> 00:12:48,642 - Why? - Well, 'cause it's against a shitload 255 00:12:48,726 --> 00:12:50,978 of really good laws, Gary. 256 00:12:51,062 --> 00:12:52,813 - Larry. - Larry. 257 00:12:52,897 --> 00:12:57,901 I got to go talk to this guy out here for a second. Will you excuse me? 258 00:12:57,986 --> 00:13:00,821 By the way, I love Jesus Christ and his mother Mary as much as anybody. 259 00:13:00,905 --> 00:13:04,533 About 38 churches you could move that crèche to, everybody lives. 260 00:13:04,701 --> 00:13:05,742 - Give me a call. - Okay. 261 00:13:05,827 --> 00:13:07,035 I love Chivas. 262 00:13:07,120 --> 00:13:08,871 Jane, how are you? 263 00:13:08,955 --> 00:13:10,581 You need a cup of coffee? 264 00:13:10,665 --> 00:13:13,000 Something to drink? Anything like that? Okay. 265 00:13:13,084 --> 00:13:14,877 - Jim. - Congressman. 266 00:13:14,961 --> 00:13:16,837 You see Lederer's AP story out of Kabul? 267 00:13:16,921 --> 00:13:18,441 Yeah. We're reading this story every day now. 268 00:13:18,465 --> 00:13:21,049 - You see Dan Rather last night? - Yeah. I did. 269 00:13:21,134 --> 00:13:23,487 Tell me something. What is the Defense Subcommittee's budget 270 00:13:23,511 --> 00:13:25,596 for covert ops against the Communists in Afghanistan? 271 00:13:25,680 --> 00:13:26,889 - All in? - All in. 272 00:13:26,973 --> 00:13:28,557 It's 5 million. 273 00:13:30,143 --> 00:13:33,312 Well, they can't shoot down helicopters for $5 million, Jim. 274 00:13:33,396 --> 00:13:36,773 Though they're trying to. Which is more than I can say for us. 275 00:13:36,858 --> 00:13:40,319 Get everybody together for me, would you? And double it. 276 00:13:40,403 --> 00:13:41,881 RECEPTIONIST: Charlie Wilson's office. 277 00:13:41,905 --> 00:13:43,697 Okay, I'm sorry, sir? 278 00:13:43,948 --> 00:13:46,033 The covert ops budget. Double it. 279 00:13:46,117 --> 00:13:47,367 (RECEPTIONIST CHATTERING) 280 00:13:48,328 --> 00:13:49,453 Okay. 281 00:13:49,537 --> 00:13:52,122 This ain't gonna be much longer, okay? 282 00:13:53,291 --> 00:13:54,333 (PHONE RINGING) 283 00:13:54,417 --> 00:13:56,585 Here's what I'm gonna do, Larry. 284 00:13:56,669 --> 00:13:58,629 RECEPTIONIST: Charlie Wilson's office. 285 00:14:00,924 --> 00:14:04,801 Maybe in about 20 minutes. He's just going into a meeting. 286 00:14:04,886 --> 00:14:05,969 Sure. 287 00:14:06,596 --> 00:14:09,181 My XO wrote in a report, 288 00:14:09,265 --> 00:14:13,644 I was the best officer he ever served at sea with, 289 00:14:13,728 --> 00:14:18,690 and the worst officer he ever served in port with. 290 00:14:18,775 --> 00:14:20,025 (LAUGHS) You can look it up. 291 00:14:20,109 --> 00:14:22,694 I must've graduated from Annapolis 292 00:14:22,779 --> 00:14:25,322 with the second most demerits of any midshipman 293 00:14:25,406 --> 00:14:27,157 in the history of the Naval Academy. 294 00:14:27,242 --> 00:14:29,743 JANE: Well, who had the most? I want to sleep with him. 295 00:14:29,827 --> 00:14:31,305 (ANGEL OF THE MORNING PLAYING ON STEREO) 296 00:14:31,329 --> 00:14:35,165 It's hotter here in D.C. than in Nacogdoches, 297 00:14:35,250 --> 00:14:38,794 so I hope you don't mind, I took off a few of my clothes. 298 00:14:38,878 --> 00:14:42,005 Well, I'm just gonna have to live with that, Jane. 299 00:14:42,173 --> 00:14:48,345 Just call me angel of the morning, angel. 300 00:14:48,429 --> 00:14:52,015 Just touch my cheek before you leave me. 301 00:14:52,100 --> 00:14:54,893 Come on over here. I'm gonna show you the best view in the District. 302 00:14:54,978 --> 00:14:57,271 - You want some of this? - No, no, I got this. 303 00:14:57,355 --> 00:15:00,857 - I like both. - Well, it must be great being me. 304 00:15:00,942 --> 00:15:02,568 I've heard it is. 305 00:15:03,611 --> 00:15:05,737 Iwo Jima Memorial. 306 00:15:05,822 --> 00:15:07,364 There's the Lincoln. 307 00:15:07,448 --> 00:15:09,950 Washington. Now follow it around to the right. 308 00:15:10,034 --> 00:15:13,912 The Jefferson Memorial. The Arlington Bridge. 309 00:15:13,997 --> 00:15:16,915 And there's the Pentagon. 310 00:15:17,000 --> 00:15:19,585 - Oh, that's the Pentagon. - That's the Pentagon. 311 00:15:19,669 --> 00:15:23,547 How about I show you the second best view in the District? 312 00:15:23,631 --> 00:15:25,674 Why, Jane, would you like... 313 00:15:25,758 --> 00:15:27,050 (PHONE RINGING) 314 00:15:27,468 --> 00:15:28,635 (SIGHS) 315 00:15:28,761 --> 00:15:30,887 Well, that was predictable. 316 00:15:31,472 --> 00:15:33,140 Just give me one second. 317 00:15:34,350 --> 00:15:36,270 - Hello? - WOMAN: That was an extraordinary thing 318 00:15:36,352 --> 00:15:37,853 you did today. 319 00:15:38,438 --> 00:15:40,439 - Who is this? - It's Joanne. 320 00:15:40,773 --> 00:15:41,982 Joanne! 321 00:15:42,734 --> 00:15:46,820 Why, gosh, how nice to hear from you. Could I call you back in a little bit? 322 00:15:46,904 --> 00:15:49,031 Is Ronald Reagan in your bedroom right now? 323 00:15:49,115 --> 00:15:51,158 - No. - Then I'm considerably more important 324 00:15:51,242 --> 00:15:53,201 - than whoever is. - Is anything wrong? 325 00:15:53,286 --> 00:15:55,996 This is gonna take just a second or two. 326 00:15:56,372 --> 00:15:58,624 Okay, I'm all yours. 327 00:15:59,083 --> 00:16:02,961 What did I do that was so extraordinary? 328 00:16:03,046 --> 00:16:04,171 "Double it." 329 00:16:04,255 --> 00:16:06,095 'Cause I was told you didn't have a girlfriend. 330 00:16:06,132 --> 00:16:09,176 - What? - You told Jim Van Wagenen to double it. 331 00:16:09,260 --> 00:16:12,554 Well, shit, Joanne, I don't know what you're talking about, 332 00:16:12,639 --> 00:16:14,973 and if I did, it'd be classified, 333 00:16:15,266 --> 00:16:16,660 and I'd wonder where you got your information 334 00:16:16,684 --> 00:16:17,809 on the Subcommittee. 335 00:16:17,894 --> 00:16:19,186 Oh, what do you care, hon? 336 00:16:19,270 --> 00:16:22,981 It's a little matter of national security and I can't help but think... 337 00:16:23,066 --> 00:16:25,150 Excuse me, I'm sorry. 338 00:16:25,234 --> 00:16:26,818 - Hold on. - I am sorry, 339 00:16:26,903 --> 00:16:28,904 but I was told you didn't have a girlfriend. 340 00:16:28,988 --> 00:16:32,991 I don't. This isn't my girlfriend. It's the sixth wealthiest woman in Texas. 341 00:16:33,076 --> 00:16:34,826 Which is still pretty good. 342 00:16:34,911 --> 00:16:36,119 Okay, so, hi. 343 00:16:36,204 --> 00:16:38,789 A friend of mine has made a terrific movie about the need 344 00:16:38,873 --> 00:16:40,999 for American aid to Afghanistan. 345 00:16:41,084 --> 00:16:42,626 - He's made a movie? - Yes. 346 00:16:42,710 --> 00:16:46,505 I'm gonna run this movie Friday night at my house at a fundraiser. 347 00:16:46,589 --> 00:16:48,840 You know, you've never been to my house, Charlie. 348 00:16:48,925 --> 00:16:51,843 You want me to come to Houston and see a movie? 349 00:16:51,928 --> 00:16:55,055 There'll be women and wealthy donors. See you Friday. 350 00:16:55,139 --> 00:16:56,515 Yes, ma'am. 351 00:17:02,939 --> 00:17:04,022 Hey. 352 00:17:05,024 --> 00:17:06,108 Hey. 353 00:17:12,615 --> 00:17:13,699 Thank you, Joanne. 354 00:17:15,284 --> 00:17:18,870 Okay. I know it was difficult for you to come in here, hat in hand. 355 00:17:18,955 --> 00:17:22,874 That's not the kind of upbringing, I guess, is the word I'm looking for. 356 00:17:22,959 --> 00:17:25,711 It's not the kind of man you are. I understand that. 357 00:17:25,795 --> 00:17:28,964 I'm not looking to humiliate you or exact a price in any way, 358 00:17:29,090 --> 00:17:30,966 so why don't you just apologize? 359 00:17:31,050 --> 00:17:33,612 We'll call it water under the dam, and we'll go about our business. 360 00:17:33,636 --> 00:17:35,595 Excuse me, what the fuck? 361 00:17:36,556 --> 00:17:38,557 - What? - What the fuck are you talking about? 362 00:17:38,641 --> 00:17:40,619 Clair George said you were coming in here to apologize. 363 00:17:40,643 --> 00:17:43,145 No, I'm supposed to come in here so you could apologize to me. 364 00:17:43,271 --> 00:17:44,980 - According to whom? - Clair George. 365 00:17:45,106 --> 00:17:48,066 You told me to go fuck myself. I'm supposed to apologize to you? 366 00:17:48,151 --> 00:17:51,236 Also, water goes over a dam and under a bridge, you poncy schoolboy. 367 00:17:51,320 --> 00:17:54,573 Clearly there's been a miscommunication between Clair George and somebody. 368 00:17:54,657 --> 00:17:55,824 - Excuse me. - Yes? 369 00:17:55,950 --> 00:17:57,261 - Does this look all right? - It's fine. 370 00:17:57,285 --> 00:17:58,429 - Thank you. - I can sand it down a little. 371 00:17:58,453 --> 00:18:00,639 I, I don't know. I have no fucking idea who this guy is. 372 00:18:00,663 --> 00:18:03,463 He is here to fix the glass that you broke the last time you were here. 373 00:18:03,499 --> 00:18:04,499 Could you just excuse us 374 00:18:04,625 --> 00:18:05,834 - for a second there? - Yes. 375 00:18:05,960 --> 00:18:07,120 You tell me to go fuck myself 376 00:18:07,170 --> 00:18:08,837 and I'm supposed to apologize? You break my window, 377 00:18:08,838 --> 00:18:10,774 - I'm supposed to apologize? - The Helsinki job was mine! 378 00:18:10,798 --> 00:18:13,485 The Helsinki job was not yours. If it was yours, you'd be in Helsinki. 379 00:18:13,509 --> 00:18:14,987 - Alan Wolfe stood in this office! - Alan Wolfe 380 00:18:15,011 --> 00:18:16,572 - is no longer the Director. - Yeah, it was on the books! 381 00:18:16,596 --> 00:18:19,347 Alan Wolfe is no longer the Director of European Operations. 382 00:18:19,474 --> 00:18:20,826 He does not make those appointments. I do. 383 00:18:20,850 --> 00:18:22,601 - Promises were made. - Not by me. 384 00:18:22,685 --> 00:18:24,936 I've been with the company for 24 years. 385 00:18:25,021 --> 00:18:26,938 I was posted in Greece for 15. 386 00:18:27,023 --> 00:18:30,776 Papandreou wins that election if I don't help the junta take him prisoner. 387 00:18:30,860 --> 00:18:34,780 I've advised and armed the Hellenic army. I've neutralized champions of Communism. 388 00:18:34,864 --> 00:18:38,116 I've spent the past three years learning Finnish! 389 00:18:38,201 --> 00:18:40,118 Which should come in handy here in Virginia! 390 00:18:40,203 --> 00:18:42,204 And I'm never, ever, sick at sea. 391 00:18:42,288 --> 00:18:45,624 So I want to know why I'm not gonna be your Helsinki station chief. 392 00:18:45,708 --> 00:18:47,542 - You're coarse. - Excuse me? 393 00:18:47,627 --> 00:18:50,212 For Helsinki, I need someone with diplomatic skills. 394 00:18:50,296 --> 00:18:51,523 - You don't have them. - Is that right? 395 00:18:51,547 --> 00:18:53,692 That is right. And I don't know why the hell I didn't fire you 396 00:18:53,716 --> 00:18:56,718 - when you broke my fucking window! - Oh, yes, sure you do, Cravely. 397 00:18:56,803 --> 00:18:58,864 - Look, Gust... - Yeah, you're fucking Roger's fiancée 398 00:18:58,888 --> 00:19:00,222 and you know I know. 399 00:19:01,808 --> 00:19:04,036 I'm not... I'm not even gonna dignify that with a response. 400 00:19:04,060 --> 00:19:05,977 Yeah, yeah, you're dignifying her in the ass 401 00:19:06,062 --> 00:19:07,979 at the Jefferson Hotel, room 1210. 402 00:19:08,064 --> 00:19:10,982 But let me ask you. The 3,000 agents Turner fired 403 00:19:11,067 --> 00:19:13,235 was that because they lacked diplomatic skills as well? 404 00:19:13,361 --> 00:19:15,161 You're referring to Admiral Stansfield Turner? 405 00:19:15,238 --> 00:19:16,321 Yeah, the 3,000 agents. 406 00:19:16,405 --> 00:19:19,324 Each and every goddamn one of them first or second generation Americans. 407 00:19:19,408 --> 00:19:21,910 Is that because they lack the proper diplomatic skills? 408 00:19:21,994 --> 00:19:24,412 Or did Turner not think it was a good idea to have spies 409 00:19:24,539 --> 00:19:27,833 who could speak the same language as the people they're fucking spying on? 410 00:19:27,917 --> 00:19:30,418 Well, I'm sorry, but you can hardly blame the Director 411 00:19:30,545 --> 00:19:33,565 for questioning the loyalty to America of people that are just barely Americans 412 00:19:33,589 --> 00:19:35,651 - in the first place. - Yeah, well, I'd like to take a moment 413 00:19:35,675 --> 00:19:37,319 to review the several ways in which you're a douchebag. 414 00:19:37,343 --> 00:19:39,344 - Get the fuck out of my office! - Yes, sir. 415 00:19:39,428 --> 00:19:41,847 - Before I end your career, asshole. - Yes, sir! 416 00:19:41,931 --> 00:19:45,058 Yeah, my friend, I'm gonna need you for a second. 417 00:19:45,560 --> 00:19:46,601 (WOMAN SCREAMS) 418 00:19:46,936 --> 00:19:48,353 God damn it! 419 00:19:48,771 --> 00:19:50,188 My loyalty? 420 00:19:51,023 --> 00:19:53,692 For 24 years, people have been trying to kill me. 421 00:19:53,776 --> 00:19:55,110 People who know how. 422 00:19:55,194 --> 00:19:58,196 Now, do you think that's because my dad was a Greek soda pop maker 423 00:19:58,281 --> 00:20:00,615 or do you think that's because I'm an American spy? 424 00:20:00,741 --> 00:20:03,243 Go fuck yourself, you fucking child. 425 00:20:09,417 --> 00:20:10,792 How was I? 426 00:20:11,794 --> 00:20:12,878 Thank you. 427 00:20:13,880 --> 00:20:17,382 There's a woman in Aliquippa, Pennsylvania, named Nitsa. 428 00:20:18,092 --> 00:20:19,634 And she thinks she's a witch. 429 00:20:19,760 --> 00:20:22,137 Yeah, she offered to put a curse on Cravely for me. 430 00:20:22,221 --> 00:20:23,305 Yeah? 431 00:20:23,472 --> 00:20:24,723 And she... 432 00:20:25,266 --> 00:20:29,102 She asked me do I want a professional curse or a health curse. 433 00:20:29,562 --> 00:20:34,065 "If it's a health curse, I can do it right away, but a professional curse takes longer." 434 00:20:34,150 --> 00:20:37,152 Well, I'm living proof she's right about that. 435 00:20:37,820 --> 00:20:39,631 - Did you get the brownie? - Oh, no, sir, I didn't. 436 00:20:39,655 --> 00:20:40,947 I got you. 437 00:20:42,992 --> 00:20:46,244 I'm reading transcripts of phone conversations 438 00:20:46,329 --> 00:20:47,996 between French and German generals 439 00:20:48,080 --> 00:20:51,416 arguing over office space at NATO headquarters 440 00:20:51,500 --> 00:20:55,253 and analyzing wiretaps out of Mercury Bay, New Zealand. 441 00:20:55,338 --> 00:20:58,924 You know, historically, a hotbed of anti-American activity. 442 00:20:59,634 --> 00:21:02,802 Yeah, nobody will come near me. I'm in the weeds. 443 00:21:03,846 --> 00:21:06,264 You know, a typical case officer 444 00:21:06,599 --> 00:21:11,269 doesn't walk into his boss' office and tell him to go fuck himself. Twice. 445 00:21:11,354 --> 00:21:14,022 I just told you, I paid a witch in Pennsylvania $80 446 00:21:14,148 --> 00:21:16,816 to put a curse on Henry Cravely for me. 447 00:21:17,443 --> 00:21:19,611 - Do I sound like a typical case officer? - No. 448 00:21:19,695 --> 00:21:22,364 Well, then, let's assume I'm not. 449 00:21:22,490 --> 00:21:24,616 Listen. If you're really not doing anything, 450 00:21:24,700 --> 00:21:26,345 why don't you come upstairs and work with us? 451 00:21:26,369 --> 00:21:28,995 - What are you doing? - Killing Russians. 452 00:21:30,289 --> 00:21:34,542 Our next slave girl is a Texas rose named Ashley Rensler. 453 00:21:34,669 --> 00:21:35,710 (CROWD CHEERING) 454 00:21:35,795 --> 00:21:39,464 Ashley is prelaw at U.T., and her three sorority sisters 455 00:21:39,548 --> 00:21:42,634 from Delta Delta Delta will wash your car or truck 456 00:21:42,718 --> 00:21:45,804 in special outfits they have chosen for the occasion. 457 00:21:45,888 --> 00:21:50,308 So, who wants their wheels cleaned clean as a whistle by a 19-year-old lawyer 458 00:21:50,393 --> 00:21:52,477 and her three friends from Tri-Delt? 459 00:21:52,561 --> 00:21:53,645 (CROWD CHEERING) 460 00:21:53,729 --> 00:21:56,564 I have 10,000, who'll give me 11? 11, 11, I got 11. 461 00:21:56,649 --> 00:21:58,483 I got 15 right here. Thank you very much. 462 00:21:58,567 --> 00:22:00,819 Oh, my God, she is a Minute Woman. 463 00:22:00,903 --> 00:22:02,737 No, she's a Tri-Delt. 464 00:22:03,656 --> 00:22:06,825 - No, she is a Minute Woman, Charlie. - Oh. Joanne. 465 00:22:06,909 --> 00:22:10,745 Yeah, she's a direct descendant of George Washington's sister. 466 00:22:10,913 --> 00:22:13,665 Says she had a great Uncle who was killed at the Alamo. 467 00:22:13,749 --> 00:22:16,835 Former Miss Cotton Bowl. Had her own local television talk show. 468 00:22:16,919 --> 00:22:20,088 Look. Pakistan's Honorary Consul to Houston, Texas. 469 00:22:20,172 --> 00:22:21,506 How's that for a title, huh? 470 00:22:21,590 --> 00:22:24,759 This is an ultra-right wing group of anti-Communist fanatics. 471 00:22:24,885 --> 00:22:28,179 - They're not ultra-right wing. - What are they? 472 00:22:28,264 --> 00:22:30,015 Well, they're ultra-right wing. 473 00:22:30,099 --> 00:22:32,434 What are you doing hanging around this woman? 474 00:22:32,560 --> 00:22:36,187 Did you hear me say she was a former Miss Cotton Bowl? 475 00:22:36,272 --> 00:22:38,690 - You are unbelievable. - Oh, come on. You're gonna love her. 476 00:22:38,774 --> 00:22:40,752 And, you know, one of the things she's trying to do over there 477 00:22:40,776 --> 00:22:42,277 is liberate the women. 478 00:22:42,403 --> 00:22:45,196 And what better way than through a slave girl auction? 479 00:22:45,281 --> 00:22:46,531 JOANNE: Charlie. 480 00:22:49,201 --> 00:22:51,619 So sorry for keeping you waiting. 481 00:22:51,704 --> 00:22:53,788 Oh, it's no problem, Joanne. 482 00:22:54,373 --> 00:22:57,208 - This is Bonnie Bach. - So nice to meet you. 483 00:23:00,463 --> 00:23:04,716 It's a pleasure meeting you, Mrs. Herring. This is a wonderful party. 484 00:23:05,968 --> 00:23:08,553 Why don't you give us a few moments? 485 00:23:09,638 --> 00:23:10,972 Yes, sir. 486 00:23:11,599 --> 00:23:16,311 Oh, Bobbie, if you could ask someone for a Bombay Martini up, very dry? 487 00:23:16,437 --> 00:23:18,480 Oh, I'm not a slave girl, actually. 488 00:23:18,606 --> 00:23:20,732 I'm the Congressman's administrative assistant. 489 00:23:20,816 --> 00:23:23,401 - Isn't that wonderful for you. - Yes. 490 00:23:23,486 --> 00:23:26,404 Two olives, please. Tell them it's for me, they'll know. 491 00:23:26,489 --> 00:23:27,781 Certainly. 492 00:23:29,784 --> 00:23:31,409 She doesn't like me. 493 00:23:31,494 --> 00:23:34,079 - Everybody likes you. - She's a liberal. 494 00:23:34,163 --> 00:23:35,914 Well, I'm a liberal. 495 00:23:36,332 --> 00:23:38,124 Not where it counts. 496 00:23:38,667 --> 00:23:39,918 Have you seen the house? 497 00:23:40,002 --> 00:23:43,088 Well, I've seen the downstairs, what's upstairs? 498 00:23:43,172 --> 00:23:44,506 Fourteen bedrooms. 499 00:23:44,632 --> 00:23:46,007 I should have a look. 500 00:23:46,133 --> 00:23:48,927 - What did you think of the movie? - What, that thing we just saw? 501 00:23:49,011 --> 00:23:51,012 The reason for the party, yes. 502 00:23:51,138 --> 00:23:53,848 Well, I'm not an expert in the field or anything, 503 00:23:53,974 --> 00:23:56,768 but the production quality seemed amateurish to me. 504 00:23:56,852 --> 00:24:00,605 Yeah, I'm not submitting the thing for a Golden Globe nomination, Charlie. 505 00:24:00,689 --> 00:24:02,941 You know what I'm talking about. 506 00:24:03,025 --> 00:24:05,693 Well, as a member of the Defense Subcommittee, 507 00:24:05,778 --> 00:24:07,112 did you think I wasn't aware 508 00:24:07,196 --> 00:24:09,364 that the Soviet Union's invaded Afghanistan? 509 00:24:09,448 --> 00:24:11,366 Yes, I believe my government is aware, 510 00:24:11,450 --> 00:24:14,012 but I was wondering if they were thinking of doing anything about it 511 00:24:14,036 --> 00:24:17,205 other than boycotting the Olympics, which I think you'll agree, 512 00:24:17,289 --> 00:24:18,790 was a fairly impotent response 513 00:24:18,874 --> 00:24:22,544 to the greatest national security threat we've faced since the Cuban Missile Crisis. 514 00:24:22,670 --> 00:24:25,797 Well, I don't think making more movies about it is gonna do the trick, 515 00:24:25,881 --> 00:24:27,465 if that's what you're asking. 516 00:24:27,550 --> 00:24:28,842 It's not. 517 00:24:30,010 --> 00:24:32,804 Exactly how much power do you have as a member of the Subcommittee? 518 00:24:32,888 --> 00:24:35,557 - Which one? I'm on two. - Foreign Ops. 519 00:24:35,683 --> 00:24:38,810 Eight members and myself hand out 11 billion in foreign assistance. 520 00:24:38,894 --> 00:24:41,062 And what about the Defense Subcommittee? 521 00:24:41,147 --> 00:24:42,230 Our budget is hidden. 522 00:24:42,356 --> 00:24:45,233 - It is also unlimited. - Yeah. 523 00:24:46,652 --> 00:24:48,820 Would you like to see my room? 524 00:24:48,904 --> 00:24:49,988 Yeah. 525 00:24:50,072 --> 00:24:51,156 (WHIMPERING) 526 00:24:51,240 --> 00:24:55,243 So, unless I'm wrong, and that would be unusual for me, 527 00:24:56,203 --> 00:24:58,223 you sit at the intersection of the State Department, 528 00:24:58,247 --> 00:25:00,248 the Pentagon and the CIA. 529 00:25:00,708 --> 00:25:03,668 You meet in a soundproof room underneath the Capitol, 530 00:25:03,752 --> 00:25:07,088 and you preside over a secret and unlimited budget 531 00:25:07,214 --> 00:25:10,842 for the three agencies you would need to conduct a covert war. 532 00:25:10,926 --> 00:25:12,510 Isn't that right? 533 00:25:12,595 --> 00:25:14,846 I also have seats at the Kennedy Center. 534 00:25:14,930 --> 00:25:18,266 Isn't that how you were able to double the CIA budget for black apropos 535 00:25:18,350 --> 00:25:20,768 in Afghanistan just by saying so? 536 00:25:20,853 --> 00:25:24,439 Why are you only asking me questions you already know the answers to? 537 00:25:24,565 --> 00:25:27,358 Why is Congress saying one thing and doing nothing? 538 00:25:27,443 --> 00:25:29,402 Well, tradition mostly. 539 00:25:35,743 --> 00:25:37,076 Come here. 540 00:25:37,703 --> 00:25:38,786 Okay. 541 00:25:47,796 --> 00:25:51,966 I do not understand the energy women have after sex. 542 00:25:52,092 --> 00:25:54,886 You're dancing around, you're baking a pie. 543 00:25:54,970 --> 00:25:56,763 - JOANNE: Charlie? - Yes, ma'am? 544 00:25:56,931 --> 00:26:00,058 Why is the CIA running a fake war in Afghanistan? 545 00:26:00,142 --> 00:26:02,143 They're doing everything they can. 546 00:26:02,228 --> 00:26:04,103 They're doing it badly. 547 00:26:04,271 --> 00:26:06,648 The CIA is arming the mujahideen. 548 00:26:06,774 --> 00:26:07,959 Where do you think they're getting their weapons? 549 00:26:07,983 --> 00:26:11,319 They're arming them with 12.7 millimeter Dishukas 550 00:26:11,445 --> 00:26:13,071 which would be good, 551 00:26:13,155 --> 00:26:16,241 except the Soviets have specifically amour-plated their Hind helicopter 552 00:26:16,325 --> 00:26:19,244 to resist a 12.7 millimeter shell. 553 00:26:19,620 --> 00:26:21,496 We sold Pakistan F-16s, 554 00:26:21,622 --> 00:26:25,250 but didn't give them the look-down/shoot-down radar. 555 00:26:25,334 --> 00:26:26,417 If this were a real war, 556 00:26:26,502 --> 00:26:28,942 State would issue a white paper outlining the Communist threat 557 00:26:29,004 --> 00:26:31,172 the way they did in El Salvador. 558 00:26:31,257 --> 00:26:35,093 If this were a real war, there'd be a National Bipartisan Commission 559 00:26:35,177 --> 00:26:39,764 on Afghanistan, headed by Henry Kissinger the way they did in Central America. 560 00:26:39,848 --> 00:26:44,018 If this were a real war, Congress would authorize $24 million 561 00:26:44,144 --> 00:26:47,355 for covert operations the way you did in Nicaragua. 562 00:26:47,773 --> 00:26:49,774 If this were a real war... 563 00:26:50,025 --> 00:26:52,860 You may be the sexiest woman ever. 564 00:26:52,987 --> 00:26:55,280 I'm not kidding. You are Helen of Troy. 565 00:26:55,364 --> 00:26:59,117 - Are you patronizing me? - What do you want me to do, Joanne? 566 00:26:59,285 --> 00:27:01,286 This is what I want you to do. 567 00:27:01,370 --> 00:27:04,497 I want you to save Afghanistan for the Afghans. 568 00:27:04,873 --> 00:27:08,793 I want you to deliver such a crushing defeat to the Soviets that Communism crumbles, 569 00:27:08,877 --> 00:27:11,212 and in so doing, end the Cold War. 570 00:27:11,297 --> 00:27:12,440 I'll tell you, I'd do it, too, 571 00:27:12,464 --> 00:27:14,966 but I got this Dairy Queen problem in Nacogdoches. 572 00:27:15,050 --> 00:27:19,012 Don't underestimate me, Charlie. Believe everything you've heard. 573 00:27:19,805 --> 00:27:21,472 What exactly do you want me to do? 574 00:27:21,557 --> 00:27:24,309 - Go to Pakistan and meet with Zia. - CHARLIE: Zia? 575 00:27:24,727 --> 00:27:26,519 Mohammed Zia ul-Haq. 576 00:27:26,979 --> 00:27:28,646 He's the President of Pakistan. 577 00:27:28,731 --> 00:27:30,231 I've already arranged it. 578 00:27:30,316 --> 00:27:33,067 You've arranged a meeting between me and the President of Pakistan? 579 00:27:33,152 --> 00:27:34,319 Yes. 580 00:27:34,403 --> 00:27:37,443 You're going to Israel next week to meet with Zvi Rafiah about the Lavi jets. 581 00:27:37,531 --> 00:27:40,408 I want you to tack Pakistan on the end of your trip. 582 00:27:40,534 --> 00:27:41,659 And meet with the President? 583 00:27:41,744 --> 00:27:44,912 Let him convince you that it's a Christian imperative 584 00:27:45,039 --> 00:27:48,207 to let the Afghans rid their country of Communism. 585 00:27:49,001 --> 00:27:52,837 Okay. It's not likely the President of Pakistan is a Christian, 586 00:27:52,921 --> 00:27:55,506 but I'm gonna do this for you, Joanne, 587 00:27:55,591 --> 00:27:58,343 'cause you saved my ass once with the pro-lifers 588 00:27:58,427 --> 00:28:02,680 and I owe you my seat in Congress and because you look very good naked. 589 00:28:02,765 --> 00:28:06,768 But I have to tell you, I'm elected by Jews. 590 00:28:06,852 --> 00:28:09,187 How many Jews do you have in your district? 591 00:28:09,271 --> 00:28:10,355 Seven. 592 00:28:10,439 --> 00:28:13,941 But congressmen aren't elected by voters, they're elected by contributors, 593 00:28:14,068 --> 00:28:17,028 and mine are in, well, New York, Florida, Hollywood, 594 00:28:17,112 --> 00:28:19,614 because I'm one of Israel's guys on the Hill. 595 00:28:19,698 --> 00:28:23,451 And I don't know how they're gonna feel about me taking up the 'cause of Muslims. 596 00:28:23,535 --> 00:28:26,204 - Well, that's your problem. - Yes, it is. 597 00:28:26,914 --> 00:28:28,456 Go fight this war and win it, Charlie. 598 00:28:28,540 --> 00:28:31,959 Everything possible is on the line, including your manhood. 599 00:28:32,044 --> 00:28:34,796 Oh, I was afraid you were gonna say that. 600 00:28:34,963 --> 00:28:36,089 (WATER RUSHING) 601 00:28:37,466 --> 00:28:39,967 Well, I guess it ain't gonna be twice tonight. 602 00:28:40,094 --> 00:28:42,553 Well, I guess somebody can't count. 603 00:28:42,638 --> 00:28:45,223 Oh, darling, I was talking about me. 604 00:29:47,870 --> 00:29:49,829 (STEWARD SPEAKING URDU) 605 00:29:51,623 --> 00:29:52,707 (RASHID SPEAKING URDU) 606 00:29:53,542 --> 00:29:54,625 (OFFICER SHOUTING) 607 00:29:54,710 --> 00:29:56,210 Congressman Charlie Wilson. 608 00:29:56,295 --> 00:29:58,880 - Mr. Congressman. - Mr. President. 609 00:30:01,717 --> 00:30:02,884 Come. 610 00:30:03,469 --> 00:30:07,972 - Joanne Herring speaks very highly of you. - Oh, well, thank you, sir. Thank you. 611 00:30:08,056 --> 00:30:09,807 These are two of my brightest advisors 612 00:30:09,892 --> 00:30:12,810 when it comes to the problem of the Soviets. 613 00:30:13,479 --> 00:30:15,146 This is Brigadier Rashid. 614 00:30:16,148 --> 00:30:17,292 - How do you do? - Pleased to meet you. 615 00:30:17,316 --> 00:30:18,676 - Colonel Mahmood. - How do you do? 616 00:30:18,734 --> 00:30:20,234 Pleased to meet you. 617 00:30:20,360 --> 00:30:22,320 - Please come. - Thank you. 618 00:30:25,824 --> 00:30:27,825 You must be thirsty. Can we get you a drink? 619 00:30:27,910 --> 00:30:31,662 Oh, actually I'd love a glass of ice and any kind of whiskey. 620 00:30:31,830 --> 00:30:33,331 Rye, Canadian. 621 00:30:37,336 --> 00:30:39,420 I'm sorry, Congressman, we don't have alcohol 622 00:30:39,546 --> 00:30:41,756 in the Presidential Residence. 623 00:30:42,341 --> 00:30:45,593 Of course, you don't. I apologize. 624 00:30:47,679 --> 00:30:48,846 Fruit juice? 625 00:30:48,931 --> 00:30:50,223 (SPEAKING URDU) 626 00:30:51,225 --> 00:30:52,767 Bet a lot of people make that mistake. 627 00:30:52,893 --> 00:30:53,935 (LAUGHING) 628 00:30:54,269 --> 00:30:55,269 No. 629 00:30:55,938 --> 00:30:57,855 - Okay. - Brigadier? 630 00:30:58,774 --> 00:31:01,943 So you understand the situation on our border? 631 00:31:02,611 --> 00:31:05,863 Yes, sir, I think I do. And I think it's terrible. 632 00:31:06,448 --> 00:31:09,700 And I know I speak for all the people in the Texas Second Congressional District 633 00:31:09,785 --> 00:31:12,286 when I say our thoughts and our prayers are with you. 634 00:31:12,412 --> 00:31:14,872 All the people of the Texas Second Congressional District, 635 00:31:14,957 --> 00:31:16,290 - you say? - Yes, indeed, sir. 636 00:31:16,416 --> 00:31:20,378 Three million Afghan refugees are living like poorly treated livestock. 637 00:31:20,462 --> 00:31:22,213 Another two million have fled into Iran. 638 00:31:22,297 --> 00:31:23,798 And two million more angry men 639 00:31:23,882 --> 00:31:25,944 is just what the doctors ordered for Iran, don't you think? 640 00:31:25,968 --> 00:31:28,553 People are dying by the tens of thousands. 641 00:31:28,637 --> 00:31:31,639 And the ones that aren't are crossing into Pakistan every day. 642 00:31:31,765 --> 00:31:33,284 MAHMOOD: Would you like to know how many? 643 00:31:33,308 --> 00:31:37,728 One fifth of Afghanistan now lives in Pakistan's North-West Frontier Province. 644 00:31:37,813 --> 00:31:39,814 ZIA: So, what I have been wondering is 645 00:31:39,898 --> 00:31:43,067 why your State Department would send someone here 646 00:31:43,151 --> 00:31:45,319 who thinks he understands the problem. 647 00:31:45,445 --> 00:31:48,906 'Cause I don't think the prayers of the Texas Second Congressional District 648 00:31:48,991 --> 00:31:50,324 are going to turn the trick. 649 00:31:50,409 --> 00:31:53,411 Well, now, I wasn't sent here by the State Department, Mr. President. 650 00:31:53,495 --> 00:31:55,496 I was asked to come here by our friend in Houston. 651 00:31:55,581 --> 00:31:57,748 So this is a courtesy call. 652 00:31:57,833 --> 00:32:01,669 I don't need courtesy. I need airplanes, guns and money. 653 00:32:01,795 --> 00:32:06,090 Well, we just doubled the CIA budget 654 00:32:06,174 --> 00:32:07,986 - for covert ops... - From 5 million to 10 million. 655 00:32:08,010 --> 00:32:10,261 - That's right. - Is that a joke? 656 00:32:11,346 --> 00:32:13,514 - No. - Is that meant to be a funny joke? 657 00:32:13,599 --> 00:32:16,434 - No, sir. - ZIA: Congressman, what they're saying is 658 00:32:16,518 --> 00:32:20,146 $10 million from the U.S. to fight the Russian Army 659 00:32:20,606 --> 00:32:23,858 is such a low figure that it can be mistaken for a joke. 660 00:32:23,942 --> 00:32:27,653 I caught up to the sarcasm there, sir. Let me be clear. 661 00:32:28,655 --> 00:32:30,781 The United States is eager to assist you. 662 00:32:30,866 --> 00:32:32,010 - No, you're not. - You're not. 663 00:32:32,034 --> 00:32:33,701 - Absolutely not. - I went to Oxford 664 00:32:33,827 --> 00:32:35,119 and I know what that word means. 665 00:32:35,203 --> 00:32:37,371 The U.S. is not eager to assist us. 666 00:32:37,497 --> 00:32:40,291 Well, now it's my understanding that we offered to sell you F-16s. 667 00:32:40,375 --> 00:32:43,127 - You didn't want them. - Because you refused to sell us the radar. 668 00:32:43,211 --> 00:32:44,462 RASHID: So to hell with that. 669 00:32:44,546 --> 00:32:47,840 ZIA: And this is emblematic of American fence sitting 670 00:32:47,966 --> 00:32:49,467 when it comes to fighting the Soviets. 671 00:32:49,551 --> 00:32:52,470 - To hell with it! - You sell us the planes but not the radar. 672 00:32:52,554 --> 00:32:55,681 You offer Afghans rifles from the First World War 673 00:32:56,058 --> 00:32:59,393 while Soviet helicopters are killing everything they can find, 674 00:32:59,478 --> 00:33:02,063 - people, animals, food supplies. - So to hell with it! 675 00:33:02,189 --> 00:33:04,398 - Yeah. - You sell the Israelis the radar, 676 00:33:04,524 --> 00:33:06,484 so that's why he says, "To hell with it." 677 00:33:06,568 --> 00:33:08,694 Again, I understood. Yeah. 678 00:33:08,904 --> 00:33:12,323 Also, the arms and funding should flow through us. 679 00:33:14,493 --> 00:33:17,244 - I'm sorry? - That's been part of the problem. 680 00:33:17,329 --> 00:33:19,830 The arms and the funding should flow through us. 681 00:33:19,915 --> 00:33:22,541 We have experience with warfare of this kind. 682 00:33:22,626 --> 00:33:25,544 And your CIA has an unimpressive track record. 683 00:33:25,629 --> 00:33:27,797 Oh. I wouldn't say that. 684 00:33:27,881 --> 00:33:31,759 They missed 130,000 Soviet soldiers walking into Afghanistan. 685 00:33:32,803 --> 00:33:34,428 Okay, we blew that call. 686 00:33:34,513 --> 00:33:36,013 I would say so. 687 00:33:39,851 --> 00:33:46,065 Well, I don't want to use up anymore of your hospitality, 688 00:33:46,149 --> 00:33:51,028 so I will take your message back to my committee chairman, 689 00:33:51,113 --> 00:33:53,864 and we will give it our fullest attention. 690 00:33:54,074 --> 00:33:56,200 Let me walk you to the door. 691 00:33:57,828 --> 00:33:58,911 (OFFICER SHOUTS COMMAND) 692 00:34:01,081 --> 00:34:03,708 I learned about you before you came here. 693 00:34:03,792 --> 00:34:07,044 I learned that you're a man of many character flaws. 694 00:34:07,254 --> 00:34:08,379 I am. 695 00:34:08,463 --> 00:34:10,548 But I also learned that you never promise anything 696 00:34:10,632 --> 00:34:12,383 you cannot deliver. 697 00:34:12,551 --> 00:34:14,218 No, I don't, Mr. President. 698 00:34:14,302 --> 00:34:15,803 Then promise me this. 699 00:34:15,887 --> 00:34:18,973 Go to Peshawar and see the refugee camps. 700 00:34:19,307 --> 00:34:20,933 Right now. Today. 701 00:34:21,435 --> 00:34:24,228 Go to Peshawar and see with your own eyes. 702 00:34:24,396 --> 00:34:27,148 I have a helicopter waiting to take you. 703 00:34:28,066 --> 00:34:29,900 All right, I'll do it. 704 00:34:30,193 --> 00:34:33,070 - Thank you, Mr. Congressman. - Mr. President. 705 00:34:38,702 --> 00:34:40,661 All right, you, come on. 706 00:34:43,081 --> 00:34:45,541 - How did it go? - Well, there were three of them. 707 00:34:45,625 --> 00:34:48,753 It was like getting slapped around by a Pakistani vaudeville team. 708 00:34:48,837 --> 00:34:50,189 You know you've pretty much hit rock bottom 709 00:34:50,213 --> 00:34:51,983 when you've been told you have character flaws by a man 710 00:34:52,007 --> 00:34:54,967 who hanged his predecessor in a military coup. 711 00:34:55,051 --> 00:34:58,763 - Can we go home now? - No. No, we have to make one more stop. 712 00:35:58,323 --> 00:35:59,740 (PEOPLE CHATTERING) 713 00:36:46,496 --> 00:36:48,289 (PEOPLE SHOUTING) 714 00:36:54,671 --> 00:36:56,338 I've seen enough. 715 00:36:59,009 --> 00:37:03,512 About 350 people in three small villages at Kandahar. 716 00:37:03,597 --> 00:37:06,557 But instead of doing it all at once, 717 00:37:06,641 --> 00:37:11,645 the Russians would make the parents watch as they slit the throats of the children. 718 00:37:11,730 --> 00:37:13,856 (SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE) 719 00:37:15,191 --> 00:37:21,864 So, the Russians gathered all the defectors and piled them like wood 720 00:37:21,948 --> 00:37:24,158 in the center of the village. 721 00:37:24,701 --> 00:37:27,036 Then they ran over them with their tanks. 722 00:37:27,120 --> 00:37:28,913 (SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE) 723 00:37:29,831 --> 00:37:33,542 WOMAN TRANSLATOR: I saw something shiny on the ground. I thought it was a toy. 724 00:37:35,879 --> 00:37:39,340 When I reached down to grab it, it exploded in my hand. 725 00:37:40,216 --> 00:37:41,634 I should have known. 726 00:37:41,718 --> 00:37:46,722 Because last year my little brother tried to pick up a piece of candy. 727 00:37:48,391 --> 00:37:50,225 It split him in half. 728 00:37:50,894 --> 00:37:54,563 It takes more work to take care of a wounded child than a dead one. 729 00:37:54,648 --> 00:37:57,483 So when the Russians cover fields with toy mines, 730 00:37:57,567 --> 00:38:01,779 adults who might help with the war effort have to take care of the children. 731 00:38:01,863 --> 00:38:03,656 BONNIE: You can see yourself. 732 00:38:05,075 --> 00:38:06,116 Like a bug. 733 00:38:06,201 --> 00:38:07,242 (BUZZING) 734 00:38:07,577 --> 00:38:09,137 (WOMAN TRANSLATING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE) 735 00:38:11,373 --> 00:38:13,040 They're beautiful. 736 00:38:13,917 --> 00:38:16,126 How many children do you have? 737 00:38:18,380 --> 00:38:19,755 (SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE) 738 00:38:20,465 --> 00:38:21,882 She had six. 739 00:38:24,094 --> 00:38:27,012 So, what do you want to be when you grow up? 740 00:38:35,438 --> 00:38:37,231 (SOBBING) 741 00:39:08,722 --> 00:39:13,308 Hi. I have Congressman Wilson here to see the station chief, Harold Holt. 742 00:39:13,393 --> 00:39:16,103 Down the hall. Second door on the left. 743 00:39:16,813 --> 00:39:17,980 I'll wait outside. 744 00:39:19,649 --> 00:39:21,567 Look, normally, a congressional delegation, 745 00:39:21,651 --> 00:39:25,029 we'd give them a courtesy briefing on the situation, but as you can see, 746 00:39:25,113 --> 00:39:28,490 it's getting pretty late, we don't have a whole lot of time anyway, so... 747 00:39:28,575 --> 00:39:30,325 Well, make the time. 748 00:39:31,161 --> 00:39:33,871 Fuck your time, Harold. I'm on Defense Appropriations. 749 00:39:33,955 --> 00:39:36,832 I'm catching a plane back to Washington in just a few minutes. 750 00:39:36,916 --> 00:39:40,044 Now, I need a full classified briefing right now. 751 00:39:43,757 --> 00:39:45,677 Hundred and twenty thousand Soviet troops in all. 752 00:39:45,717 --> 00:39:48,927 - Hundred and twenty thousand? - 40th Army is garrisoned in the cities 753 00:39:49,012 --> 00:39:50,179 and in the airports. 754 00:39:50,263 --> 00:39:52,890 Your seventh and eighth infantry divisions are in Kabul. 755 00:39:52,974 --> 00:39:55,726 The 18th in Mazar-e Sharif, the fourth armored... 756 00:39:55,810 --> 00:39:57,936 - Anything inside? - I'm sorry? 757 00:39:58,021 --> 00:39:59,688 They controlling anything inside? 758 00:39:59,773 --> 00:40:03,609 Soviet advisors have appropriated the Afghan intel service and the ministries. 759 00:40:03,693 --> 00:40:05,110 Which ministries? 760 00:40:05,195 --> 00:40:06,570 All of them. 761 00:40:06,905 --> 00:40:11,200 Anyway, the fourth armored covers Bagram Airbase. 762 00:40:11,284 --> 00:40:12,493 Seventh Armored is... 763 00:40:12,577 --> 00:40:15,370 Why ain't they shooting down them helicopters? 764 00:40:15,455 --> 00:40:18,373 - I'm sorry? - The helicopters, Harold. 765 00:40:18,458 --> 00:40:21,877 Why ain't we giving them something to shoot down them helicopters? 766 00:40:21,961 --> 00:40:25,422 The helicopters are a problem. 767 00:40:27,342 --> 00:40:28,675 You think? 768 00:40:29,469 --> 00:40:31,804 - Congressman... - They're shooting at Soviet gunships 769 00:40:31,888 --> 00:40:35,557 with Enfield rifles. That's basically what Davy Crockett used. 770 00:40:35,642 --> 00:40:38,477 The Soviet Hind gunship is especially amour plated to resist bullets. 771 00:40:38,561 --> 00:40:42,523 Yeah, I know, I know. So you tell me what you need to shoot them down. 772 00:40:42,607 --> 00:40:45,400 - What do you mean? - Tell me what you need. 773 00:40:46,611 --> 00:40:47,797 Do you understand what I'm saying? 774 00:40:47,821 --> 00:40:51,657 You tell me what you need, and I will go about getting it for you. 775 00:40:51,741 --> 00:40:54,076 Congressman, I appreciate your generosity, 776 00:40:54,160 --> 00:40:58,997 but a sudden influx of money and modern weaponry would draw attention. 777 00:40:59,916 --> 00:41:02,417 - What? - A sudden influx of money and modern... 778 00:41:02,502 --> 00:41:05,587 - Wait, it would draw attention? - Yeah. 779 00:41:06,589 --> 00:41:09,174 Why, I don't even know what that means. 780 00:41:09,259 --> 00:41:11,070 This is the Cold War. Everybody knows about it. 781 00:41:11,094 --> 00:41:12,196 Should I continue with the briefing? 782 00:41:12,220 --> 00:41:16,306 Have you been to these refugee camps? Have you heard these stories? 783 00:41:16,391 --> 00:41:19,601 Congressman, I am required to give you a briefing. 784 00:41:19,936 --> 00:41:21,603 Should I continue? 785 00:41:21,938 --> 00:41:23,438 No. Thank you. 786 00:41:35,034 --> 00:41:36,827 (SIGHING) 787 00:41:37,120 --> 00:41:42,124 You know, I had a neighbor, growing up, with a name right out of Dickens. 788 00:41:43,293 --> 00:41:45,460 Mr. Charles Hazard. 789 00:41:46,796 --> 00:41:49,965 And Mr. Hazard didn't like the neighborhood dogs 790 00:41:50,049 --> 00:41:52,134 messing up his flower beds. 791 00:41:52,677 --> 00:41:54,613 One day, I heard a bunch of yelling from across the street, 792 00:41:54,637 --> 00:41:56,054 so I ran on over to Mr. Hazard's, 793 00:41:56,139 --> 00:41:59,892 and there were about 15 grown-ups standing around my dog, Teddy, 794 00:41:59,976 --> 00:42:03,854 who was writhing on the ground in obvious agony. 795 00:42:04,397 --> 00:42:06,273 Blood was pouring out of his mouth. 796 00:42:06,357 --> 00:42:08,650 Mr. Hazard had ground up a glass bottle 797 00:42:08,735 --> 00:42:11,987 and put it in a bowl of dog food and fed it to him. 798 00:42:13,698 --> 00:42:15,324 What did you do? 799 00:42:15,825 --> 00:42:18,952 Well, I got some gasoline and burned down his flower beds. 800 00:42:19,037 --> 00:42:21,455 But that wasn't satisfying enough. 801 00:42:22,582 --> 00:42:26,210 And then I remembered, Mr. Hazard was an elected official. 802 00:42:26,294 --> 00:42:28,629 He was the head of the town council. 803 00:42:28,713 --> 00:42:31,590 His reelection every two years was a foregone conclusion. 804 00:42:31,674 --> 00:42:36,094 So come Election Day, I drove over to the black section of town. 805 00:42:36,179 --> 00:42:39,473 Now, these people hadn't voted in any of these elections, so... 806 00:42:39,557 --> 00:42:42,434 I was only 13, but I had a farmer's license 807 00:42:43,978 --> 00:42:46,874 and I filled up my car with black voters and drove them to the polling place 808 00:42:46,898 --> 00:42:51,193 and then waited, then drove them on home. But before they got out of the car to vote 809 00:42:51,277 --> 00:42:56,406 I said, "I don't mean to influence you, but I think you should know." 810 00:42:56,491 --> 00:43:00,077 "Mr. Charles Hazard has intentionally killed my dog." 811 00:43:02,497 --> 00:43:05,207 About 400 ballots were cast in that election. 812 00:43:05,291 --> 00:43:07,876 I drove 96 of them to the polls. 813 00:43:08,962 --> 00:43:11,046 Hazard lost by 16 votes. 814 00:43:14,634 --> 00:43:18,136 And that's the day I fell in love with America. 815 00:43:21,683 --> 00:43:23,475 What time do we land? 816 00:43:24,102 --> 00:43:26,144 7:30 A.M. in D.C. 817 00:43:26,854 --> 00:43:29,439 I want the CIA in my office at 10:00. 818 00:43:30,233 --> 00:43:32,776 Assistant Deputy Director or higher. 819 00:43:33,194 --> 00:43:35,862 Tell them that if I don't see someone at 10:00, 820 00:43:35,947 --> 00:43:40,867 I'm gonna start docking their allowance at a rate of $1 million a minute. 821 00:43:41,077 --> 00:43:42,327 Yes, sir. 822 00:43:42,662 --> 00:43:44,139 And get me another one of them, would you? 823 00:43:44,163 --> 00:43:45,247 (CLEARING THROAT) 824 00:43:46,124 --> 00:43:47,416 Yes, sir. 825 00:43:50,003 --> 00:43:50,127 AGENT PATRICK: The AKs, RPG-7 grenade launchers. 826 00:43:50,128 --> 00:43:52,170 AGENT PATRICK: The AKs, RPG-7 grenade launchers 827 00:43:52,255 --> 00:43:55,465 and 82 millimeter mortars are coming into Pakistan by air and sea, 828 00:43:55,550 --> 00:43:57,278 and then trucks take them to the Afghan border. 829 00:43:57,302 --> 00:43:59,177 AGENT WELLS: Then we take them across on mules, 830 00:43:59,262 --> 00:44:00,948 which are running a little more than we thought. 831 00:44:00,972 --> 00:44:02,639 - The mules? - They're 2,400 a piece, 832 00:44:02,724 --> 00:44:04,684 - plus we got to get them checked out. - For what? 833 00:44:04,767 --> 00:44:08,020 Diseases. Foot and mouth. Plus they have to have their ears cleaned. 834 00:44:08,104 --> 00:44:10,439 The mules are getting better health care than the Afghans. 835 00:44:10,523 --> 00:44:13,817 AGENT WELLS: Plus, they're gonna cost a little extra if we want them pre-trained. 836 00:44:13,901 --> 00:44:15,444 - To do what? - Walk over a Mountain 837 00:44:15,528 --> 00:44:16,672 with ammunition on their back. 838 00:44:16,696 --> 00:44:18,090 Aren't they born with that instinct? 839 00:44:18,114 --> 00:44:20,782 I mean, isn't that something they want to do naturally? 840 00:44:20,867 --> 00:44:24,119 You think Afghanistan might, one day, think about building some fucking roads? 841 00:44:24,203 --> 00:44:25,954 - Gust. - Yeah? 842 00:44:26,039 --> 00:44:27,956 I got something for you. 843 00:44:28,958 --> 00:44:30,334 I need you to be specific... 844 00:44:30,418 --> 00:44:32,938 MARLA: The whole thing has changed. Get your diary. I'll show you. 845 00:44:32,962 --> 00:44:34,046 Okay. 846 00:44:35,298 --> 00:44:37,174 RECEPTIONIST: No problem. Thank you. 847 00:44:38,760 --> 00:44:42,637 - He should be here any moment. - Don't worry about me. I'm fine. 848 00:44:44,140 --> 00:44:45,891 - Good morning. - Good morning, Congressman. 849 00:44:45,975 --> 00:44:47,601 - Welcome back. - Yeah. Marla. 850 00:44:47,685 --> 00:44:49,102 - Welcome back. - Suzanne. 851 00:44:49,187 --> 00:44:50,645 Welcome back. 852 00:44:52,023 --> 00:44:54,274 - Who are you? - RECEPTIONIST: This is Gust Avrakotos. 853 00:44:54,359 --> 00:44:56,170 He's come up from Langley to bring you the information 854 00:44:56,194 --> 00:44:58,153 - that you wanted. - Bonnie! 855 00:44:58,738 --> 00:45:01,323 - Yes, sir? - I said Assistant Deputy Director or higher. 856 00:45:01,407 --> 00:45:03,385 - I know, sir. I called... - No, Assistant Deputies don't come 857 00:45:03,409 --> 00:45:04,553 to the Hill without a subpoena. 858 00:45:04,577 --> 00:45:07,297 I'm the guy you want to talk to, Congressman. I'm on the Afghan desk. 859 00:45:07,330 --> 00:45:09,206 - You're on the Afghan desk? - Yeah. 860 00:45:09,290 --> 00:45:11,890 Well, I wouldn't be too proud of that. I just got back from there. 861 00:45:11,959 --> 00:45:14,294 Oh, I know. And that's a hell of a flight, too. 862 00:45:14,379 --> 00:45:16,231 That nine hours flying time against the jet stream. 863 00:45:16,255 --> 00:45:18,442 Probably had to stop in Brussels, plus the time difference. 864 00:45:18,466 --> 00:45:21,510 - I'd be a little grumpy myself. - I ain't grumpy because of the plane. 865 00:45:21,594 --> 00:45:25,722 We want to give you this 'cause we know you like single malt. 866 00:45:25,807 --> 00:45:27,265 It's called Talisker, 867 00:45:27,350 --> 00:45:29,390 and it's mentioned in a Robert Louis Stevenson poem, 868 00:45:29,435 --> 00:45:31,228 The Scotsman's Return from Abroad. 869 00:45:31,312 --> 00:45:33,188 "The king o' drinks, as I conceive it,." 870 00:45:33,272 --> 00:45:35,732 "Talisker, Isla or Glenlivet!" 871 00:45:35,817 --> 00:45:38,318 - Who are you again? - Gust Avrakotos. 872 00:45:39,695 --> 00:45:42,739 - Have Bonnie come into this meeting. - MARLA: Yes, sir. 873 00:45:43,533 --> 00:45:45,200 What's the gift for? 874 00:45:45,284 --> 00:45:48,120 It's from the Afghan desk for doubling the budget for the mujahideen. 875 00:45:48,204 --> 00:45:50,914 Oh. Well, thank you. 876 00:45:51,541 --> 00:45:53,083 It was nothing. 877 00:45:53,376 --> 00:45:55,877 Well, it's a nice bottle of Scotch. 878 00:45:56,671 --> 00:45:59,548 - Must've been hard to get. - No, doubling the budget was nothing. 879 00:45:59,632 --> 00:46:02,634 I mean, $10 million for covert ops against the Russian Army is meaningless. 880 00:46:02,718 --> 00:46:05,220 - What are you, an infant? - Now, you hang on just one second. 881 00:46:05,304 --> 00:46:07,681 - I don't remember your name. - Gust Avrakotos. 882 00:46:07,765 --> 00:46:09,808 - Gust Avrakotos. - Yeah. 883 00:46:09,892 --> 00:46:11,560 Okay, you mind if I call you Gus? 884 00:46:11,644 --> 00:46:14,062 Yeah, well, my name's Gust with a "t," but I don't care. 885 00:46:14,147 --> 00:46:19,568 Fifteen hours ago, I offered Harold Holt the keys to the safe, okay? 886 00:46:20,403 --> 00:46:24,656 I stood there in the office in Islamabad, and I said, "How much do you need?" 887 00:46:24,740 --> 00:46:26,241 And I was apparently annoying him. 888 00:46:26,325 --> 00:46:29,077 Well, Harold Holt's a massive tool, Congressman. He's a cake-eater. 889 00:46:29,162 --> 00:46:30,871 He's a clown. He's a bad station chief. 890 00:46:30,955 --> 00:46:34,059 And I don't mean to cast aspersions on a guy, but he's gonna get us all killed. 891 00:46:34,083 --> 00:46:35,250 - Really? - Yeah. 892 00:46:35,334 --> 00:46:38,211 Well, how does he expect to defeat the Soviets in Afghanistan without... 893 00:46:38,296 --> 00:46:40,399 - He said, "A sudden influx of money..." - Yeah, an influx of money 894 00:46:40,423 --> 00:46:41,817 and new weaponry would draw attention. 895 00:46:41,841 --> 00:46:44,301 He's not trying to defeat the Soviets, Congressman. 896 00:46:44,385 --> 00:46:45,529 What the hell are you talking about? 897 00:46:45,553 --> 00:46:46,595 (KNOCK ON DOOR) 898 00:46:47,513 --> 00:46:48,847 Excuse me. 899 00:46:49,974 --> 00:46:51,683 I'm the Congressman's aide, Bonnie Bach. 900 00:46:51,767 --> 00:46:52,934 Gust Avrakotos. 901 00:46:53,019 --> 00:46:54,686 Gus, I need the room for a second. 902 00:46:54,770 --> 00:46:56,438 - Sure. - Jailbait! 903 00:47:00,193 --> 00:47:02,777 Whoa, whoa. Hey, hey. Whoa, all right. 904 00:47:02,862 --> 00:47:04,070 Just tell me what's happening. 905 00:47:04,155 --> 00:47:06,395 A Justice Department task force that was formed last year 906 00:47:06,449 --> 00:47:08,677 to investigate reports of sex between members of the House 907 00:47:08,701 --> 00:47:12,496 and their male interns has recently widened to include the use of recreational drugs 908 00:47:12,580 --> 00:47:14,498 by senators and congressmen. 909 00:47:14,582 --> 00:47:15,893 Do you know a man named Paul Brown? 910 00:47:15,917 --> 00:47:17,019 BONNIE: He doesn't have to answer that. Keep going. 911 00:47:17,043 --> 00:47:18,084 Oh, shit. 912 00:47:18,169 --> 00:47:22,172 Paul Brown, under investigation by federal prosecutors for fraud. 913 00:47:22,715 --> 00:47:25,634 He wanted me to invest in some TV show for Crystal. 914 00:47:25,718 --> 00:47:28,094 Well, he's saying he witnessed you doing cocaine nine times 915 00:47:28,179 --> 00:47:30,096 in a fantasy suite in Las Vegas. 916 00:47:30,181 --> 00:47:32,891 Brian Ross at NBC is breaking the story. 917 00:47:33,017 --> 00:47:36,978 All right, guys. I was in Las Vegas with Crystal and Paul Brown, 918 00:47:37,063 --> 00:47:39,356 because she wanted me to talk to him about this thing. 919 00:47:39,440 --> 00:47:41,107 There was cocaine? 920 00:47:42,193 --> 00:47:44,338 I want you to go in the other room and start on a statement. 921 00:47:44,362 --> 00:47:45,923 - Let's get Stu on the phone. - Okay, I'll call him. 922 00:47:45,947 --> 00:47:48,091 - BONNIE: Okay, Bait, you just need to - - START... CHARLIE: It's all right, everybody. 923 00:47:48,115 --> 00:47:49,718 It's gonna be all right. I want to get back to... 924 00:47:49,742 --> 00:47:50,784 Gus! 925 00:47:52,620 --> 00:47:53,703 You having problems? 926 00:47:53,788 --> 00:47:54,871 (CLEARS THROAT) 927 00:47:54,956 --> 00:47:55,997 No. 928 00:47:56,082 --> 00:47:58,667 What do you mean, he's not trying to defeat the Soviets? 929 00:47:58,751 --> 00:48:01,378 Well, he wants to bleed them. Payback for Vietnam. 930 00:48:01,462 --> 00:48:03,023 Make it so they just have to keep sending troops in, 931 00:48:03,047 --> 00:48:04,414 keep sending money, and troops, and money 932 00:48:04,423 --> 00:48:06,360 until they just go out of their fucking minds the way we did. 933 00:48:06,384 --> 00:48:09,052 You mean to tell me that the U.S. strategy in Afghanistan 934 00:48:09,136 --> 00:48:11,198 is to have the Afghans keep walking into machine gun fire 935 00:48:11,222 --> 00:48:13,589 - till the Russians run out of bullets? - That's Harold Holt's strategy. 936 00:48:13,599 --> 00:48:15,536 - It's not U.S. strategy. - What is U.S. strategy? 937 00:48:15,560 --> 00:48:18,205 Well, strictly speaking, we don't have one. But we're working hard on that. 938 00:48:18,229 --> 00:48:19,709 - Who's we? - Me and three other guys. 939 00:48:19,772 --> 00:48:20,814 (KNOCK ON DOOR) 940 00:48:21,440 --> 00:48:23,191 Would you excuse me? 941 00:48:23,276 --> 00:48:24,609 (CLEARS THROAT) 942 00:48:27,905 --> 00:48:29,025 All right, what do you have? 943 00:48:29,073 --> 00:48:32,386 "Representative Charles Wilson has learned he is joining several members of Congress" 944 00:48:32,410 --> 00:48:35,305 "who are under investigation by a Justice Department task force that is..." 945 00:48:35,329 --> 00:48:36,640 Don't say task force. It makes it sound 946 00:48:36,664 --> 00:48:37,975 - like Eliot Ness is running the thing. - Okay. 947 00:48:37,999 --> 00:48:40,584 Who is running the thing? Who's the prosecutor? 948 00:48:40,668 --> 00:48:42,437 Rudolph Giuliani, New York, Southern District. 949 00:48:42,461 --> 00:48:44,004 - You know him? - No. 950 00:48:44,088 --> 00:48:46,275 Well, it's been going on forever. We should say that, too. 951 00:48:46,299 --> 00:48:49,444 "Representative Charles Wilson has learned he is joining several members of Congress" 952 00:48:49,468 --> 00:48:51,803 "who are under investigation by the Justice Department" 953 00:48:51,887 --> 00:48:54,598 "in what is now an 18-month long, wide-ranging examination" 954 00:48:54,682 --> 00:48:56,558 "that has resulted in no convictions." 955 00:48:56,642 --> 00:48:58,745 "Congressman Wilson has not been charged with any crime," 956 00:48:58,769 --> 00:49:00,649 "nor has he been questioned by the authorities." 957 00:49:00,730 --> 00:49:03,440 "He denies any allegation of illegal or improper behavior" 958 00:49:03,524 --> 00:49:05,544 "and will fully cooperate with the ongoing investigation." 959 00:49:05,568 --> 00:49:07,861 - Okay. Run it by Stu. - JAILBAIT: Yes, sir. 960 00:49:09,572 --> 00:49:10,655 Gus! 961 00:49:13,534 --> 00:49:16,077 - You and three other guys? - Yeah. 962 00:49:16,162 --> 00:49:19,956 Well, I'll tell you what I told Harold Holt. I can get the money. 963 00:49:20,041 --> 00:49:23,043 Now, the 10 million is a joke? Fine. What do you need? 964 00:49:23,127 --> 00:49:24,896 - To do what? - To shoot down the helicopters. 965 00:49:24,920 --> 00:49:26,106 To shoot down the helicopters. 966 00:49:26,130 --> 00:49:28,673 If we can help them shoot down the goddamn helicopters, 967 00:49:28,758 --> 00:49:30,152 everything's gonna start going our way. 968 00:49:30,176 --> 00:49:33,595 You know, there's a story about a Zen master and a little boy. 969 00:49:33,679 --> 00:49:35,555 All right, and... Yeah. 970 00:49:38,893 --> 00:49:41,394 - It's Stu. - You should be on this. 971 00:49:43,397 --> 00:49:44,439 Stu? 972 00:49:44,940 --> 00:49:46,858 No. No, it's gonna be fine. 973 00:49:46,942 --> 00:49:48,902 It was a party in Vegas. 974 00:49:49,236 --> 00:49:51,154 Lot of drugs, lot of people I don't know. 975 00:49:51,238 --> 00:49:54,532 I was there with Crystal Lee and this guy Paul Brown 976 00:49:54,617 --> 00:49:57,744 who wanted me to invest in a TV show for Crystal. 977 00:49:58,162 --> 00:49:59,245 I don't know. 978 00:49:59,330 --> 00:50:02,374 I don't know, it's gonna be like a Dallas set in Washington. 979 00:50:02,458 --> 00:50:04,584 What... Stu, what does it matter? 980 00:50:04,669 --> 00:50:05,752 Okay. 981 00:50:06,420 --> 00:50:07,504 Okay. 982 00:50:08,089 --> 00:50:10,298 Will Crystal back up your story that you weren't using? 983 00:50:10,383 --> 00:50:12,676 Just go put out the statement. 984 00:50:12,843 --> 00:50:14,344 You know what? 985 00:50:14,637 --> 00:50:18,223 You never should have been in the same room, Congressman. 986 00:50:18,307 --> 00:50:19,349 (DOOR SLAMS) 987 00:50:20,685 --> 00:50:21,768 Gus! 988 00:50:23,062 --> 00:50:26,523 - Yeah. - The Swiss make an antiaircraft gun 989 00:50:26,607 --> 00:50:28,400 - called the Oerlikon. - Listen, Charlie. 990 00:50:28,484 --> 00:50:31,778 - Twenty-millimeter Cannon, high rate of fire. - I know the Oerlikon. 991 00:50:31,862 --> 00:50:34,864 - Don't forget the limo driver. - What do you mean? 992 00:50:34,949 --> 00:50:37,742 Well, you took a limo from the casino to the airport. 993 00:50:37,827 --> 00:50:40,555 Maybe it's easy enough to track down a limo driver, hand him a subpoena, 994 00:50:40,579 --> 00:50:42,265 ask him if anything was going on in the back seat, 995 00:50:42,289 --> 00:50:44,290 so, you know, in terms of cleaning up this... 996 00:50:44,375 --> 00:50:45,834 Were you listening at the door? 997 00:50:45,918 --> 00:50:47,813 - I wasn't listening at the door. - Were you standing 998 00:50:47,837 --> 00:50:49,963 - at the goddamn door listening to me? - No. 999 00:50:50,047 --> 00:50:52,465 How could you even... That's a thick door! 1000 00:50:52,550 --> 00:50:54,300 You stood there and you listened to me? 1001 00:50:54,385 --> 00:50:55,779 I wasn't standing at the door. Don't be an idiot. 1002 00:50:55,803 --> 00:50:58,221 - I bugged the Scotch bottle. - What? 1003 00:50:59,223 --> 00:51:03,309 Yeah, it's got a little transmitter on it. I got a little thing in my ear. Get past it. 1004 00:51:03,394 --> 00:51:06,688 I don't believe this. Who the fuck... Who the fuck are you? 1005 00:51:06,772 --> 00:51:08,481 It's not in my ear right now. Take it easy. 1006 00:51:08,566 --> 00:51:11,044 I was gonna tell you about it, but I had to leave the room for a second 1007 00:51:11,068 --> 00:51:13,135 - 'cause you were getting indicted. - I ain't getting indicted. 1008 00:51:13,154 --> 00:51:15,530 - Is there a camera in here? - No, that's a little paranoid. 1009 00:51:15,614 --> 00:51:16,781 That's right. 1010 00:51:16,866 --> 00:51:19,909 Will you take the bug off my Scotch bottle now? 1011 00:51:20,286 --> 00:51:21,369 Sure. 1012 00:51:24,081 --> 00:51:27,250 I saw two kids, had their hands blown off 1013 00:51:27,668 --> 00:51:29,377 when they tried to pick up something shiny. 1014 00:51:29,462 --> 00:51:32,464 Sometimes the kids think those bombs are toys. 1015 00:51:32,548 --> 00:51:34,841 - For children to pick up. - Yeah. 1016 00:51:35,426 --> 00:51:37,026 - They're raping the women and... - Yeah. 1017 00:51:37,052 --> 00:51:40,221 - Bayoneting the pregnant ones. - It's as bad as it can be. 1018 00:51:40,306 --> 00:51:43,391 But they still want to go out and fight the Red Army. 1019 00:51:43,476 --> 00:51:45,579 Each and every one of them. I've never seen anything like that. 1020 00:51:45,603 --> 00:51:47,187 No, me, neither. 1021 00:51:47,813 --> 00:51:50,482 Let's be clear. I want to kill Russians as much as you do. 1022 00:51:50,566 --> 00:51:53,610 Is the Oerlikon the right gun? Is that what they should have? 1023 00:51:53,694 --> 00:51:55,403 Now, you know what? 1024 00:51:55,654 --> 00:51:56,696 You've had a long flight. 1025 00:51:56,781 --> 00:51:58,508 You're under a lot of stress. You're under arrest. 1026 00:51:58,532 --> 00:52:00,033 I ain't under arrest. 1027 00:52:00,117 --> 00:52:01,701 - Do you drink? - Oh, God, yeah. 1028 00:52:01,786 --> 00:52:03,328 Well, should we try this Scotch, 1029 00:52:03,412 --> 00:52:05,182 or is it gonna release sarin gas when I open it? 1030 00:52:05,206 --> 00:52:08,124 Oh, I don't think so, but open it over there. 1031 00:52:13,672 --> 00:52:16,174 How'd a guy like you get into the Agency? 1032 00:52:16,258 --> 00:52:19,469 - What, you mean a street guy? - You ain't James Bond. 1033 00:52:19,553 --> 00:52:22,972 And you ain't Thomas Jefferson, so let's call it even. 1034 00:52:23,182 --> 00:52:24,265 Deal. 1035 00:52:25,976 --> 00:52:27,579 Since there's no other reason I should be here, 1036 00:52:27,603 --> 00:52:30,647 let's assume it's 'cause I'm very good at this. 1037 00:52:33,150 --> 00:52:35,610 They need to shoot down the helicopters, Gus. 1038 00:52:35,694 --> 00:52:38,238 They need at least, what, 50 Oerlikons. 1039 00:52:38,322 --> 00:52:40,282 Yeah, it's gonna cost a lot more than $10 million. 1040 00:52:40,366 --> 00:52:42,302 And I say for the fourth time, I can raise the money. 1041 00:52:42,326 --> 00:52:43,618 Yeah, how? 1042 00:52:43,702 --> 00:52:46,871 Is the Oerlikon the gun I should be recommending? 1043 00:52:46,997 --> 00:52:48,414 I'm not sure. 1044 00:52:48,499 --> 00:52:51,042 - Who is sure? - A weapons guy named Mike Vickers. 1045 00:52:51,126 --> 00:52:53,336 - I'll call him. - Yeah. Let's call him right now. 1046 00:52:59,343 --> 00:53:01,344 All right, here's a test. 1047 00:53:01,929 --> 00:53:03,657 You see the nerdy-looking kid in the white shirt 1048 00:53:03,681 --> 00:53:06,641 - playing against the four guys at once? - CHARLIE: Yeah. 1049 00:53:06,934 --> 00:53:11,688 Which one of the guys do you think is a strategic weapons expert with the CIA? 1050 00:53:12,231 --> 00:53:13,690 (SIGHING) 1051 00:53:14,108 --> 00:53:17,819 That was a trick question, Charlie. It's the nerdy-looking kid in the white shirt. 1052 00:53:17,903 --> 00:53:19,589 All right, no reason this can't be fun, you know. 1053 00:53:19,613 --> 00:53:22,198 - Mike! - Yeah, just a second. 1054 00:53:22,658 --> 00:53:24,409 Need you now, Mike. 1055 00:53:28,497 --> 00:53:29,956 Keep playing. 1056 00:53:31,292 --> 00:53:33,459 Mike Vickers, this is Congressman Charles Wilson 1057 00:53:33,544 --> 00:53:35,545 of the Defense Appropriations Subcommittee. 1058 00:53:35,629 --> 00:53:38,131 - How are you, sir? - Fine, thank you. 1059 00:53:39,049 --> 00:53:41,968 - How old are you? - I'll be 30 next week. 1060 00:53:42,052 --> 00:53:44,429 This is the CIA's weapons expert? 1061 00:53:44,513 --> 00:53:46,180 - One of them. - But he's the most senior. 1062 00:53:46,265 --> 00:53:47,307 - GUS: Look... - MAN: Mike! 1063 00:53:47,391 --> 00:53:49,642 Yeah, bishop to queen's knight 7. 1064 00:53:49,727 --> 00:53:51,427 See? He's playing without even looking at the board. 1065 00:53:51,437 --> 00:53:52,562 That's a useful skill 1066 00:53:52,646 --> 00:53:55,648 if Afghanistan's ever invaded by Boris Spassky. 1067 00:53:55,733 --> 00:53:58,086 Did my office not make it clear to Langley that I'm in no mood 1068 00:53:58,110 --> 00:53:59,212 - to be fucked around with? - Charlie... 1069 00:53:59,236 --> 00:54:01,423 You answer to me or you answer to Jim Baker. Which do you want? 1070 00:54:01,447 --> 00:54:04,384 All right, the guy's a fucking Green Beret, Charlie. He trained with the SEALs. 1071 00:54:04,408 --> 00:54:06,910 - No one's trying to fuck with you! - MAN: Mike? 1072 00:54:06,994 --> 00:54:09,913 - Yeah, what was your move? - Knight to queen's bishop 5. 1073 00:54:09,997 --> 00:54:11,581 All right, queen to king's rook 3. 1074 00:54:11,665 --> 00:54:14,667 Guy on the right, you don't want to trade queens with me. 1075 00:54:14,752 --> 00:54:15,835 Shit. 1076 00:54:16,170 --> 00:54:18,671 All right, I apologize. 1077 00:54:18,756 --> 00:54:20,757 - Okay. - Everybody friends? 1078 00:54:20,883 --> 00:54:24,218 As a former naval officer myself, Mike, I should've known better. 1079 00:54:24,303 --> 00:54:26,281 As a former naval officer, I'd have been surprised if you had. 1080 00:54:26,305 --> 00:54:27,388 - Now, what the fuck? - Hey. 1081 00:54:27,473 --> 00:54:29,349 - He said he was sorry. - Hey. 1082 00:54:29,433 --> 00:54:30,892 What can I do for you, sir? 1083 00:54:30,976 --> 00:54:33,811 All right, he wants to make a recommendation to his Subcommittee. 1084 00:54:33,896 --> 00:54:36,958 Now, the Swiss made Oerlikon S.T.A. antiaircraft Cannon, that's what you'd use 1085 00:54:36,982 --> 00:54:39,442 to shoot down the MI-24 Hind gunship in the mountains, right? 1086 00:54:39,526 --> 00:54:40,712 Well, the Oerlikon's a good start, 1087 00:54:40,736 --> 00:54:42,964 but the Russians will just start flying higher altitude missions. 1088 00:54:42,988 --> 00:54:44,072 So what else do they need? 1089 00:54:44,156 --> 00:54:46,908 Same thing you give us. AK-47s, AK-74s, AKMS. 1090 00:54:46,992 --> 00:54:49,137 The Soviets didn't come into Afghanistan on a Eurail Pass. 1091 00:54:49,161 --> 00:54:50,620 They came in T-55 tanks. 1092 00:54:50,704 --> 00:54:53,414 The fighters need RPG-7 anti-tank grenade launchers, 1093 00:54:53,499 --> 00:54:57,919 Katyusha 107mm rockets, wire mines, plastic mines, bicycle bombs, sniper rifles, 1094 00:54:58,003 --> 00:54:59,420 ammunition for all the above 1095 00:54:59,505 --> 00:55:01,316 and frequency-hopping radios and burst transmitters 1096 00:55:01,340 --> 00:55:03,925 so these guys aren't so fucking easy to find. 1097 00:55:04,009 --> 00:55:06,009 Well, I've written it all in a report you can read. 1098 00:55:06,053 --> 00:55:08,346 You'd be the first one who did. 1099 00:55:09,515 --> 00:55:11,808 Send a copy of it to me by secure courier right away. 1100 00:55:11,892 --> 00:55:14,102 - I will. All right. - All right. 1101 00:55:16,814 --> 00:55:19,649 - There was a report? - It's not that simple. 1102 00:55:19,942 --> 00:55:22,735 - Why not? - Well, for one thing it's covert. 1103 00:55:22,820 --> 00:55:24,506 When an Afghan freedom fighter gets captured, 1104 00:55:24,530 --> 00:55:26,007 it can't be with an American-made weapon on him. 1105 00:55:26,031 --> 00:55:27,907 That's how a cold war turns into an actual war, 1106 00:55:27,992 --> 00:55:29,970 and that's something you want to keep a good eye on. 1107 00:55:29,994 --> 00:55:31,953 So anything we give them has to look like 1108 00:55:32,037 --> 00:55:34,956 it could have plausibly been captured from the Soviets. 1109 00:55:35,040 --> 00:55:36,768 - Yeah, that's right. - You know who's good at that? 1110 00:55:36,792 --> 00:55:39,127 - Israel and Egypt. - That's right. 1111 00:55:40,713 --> 00:55:42,190 You know what Vickers just described back there 1112 00:55:42,214 --> 00:55:44,632 could cost as much as $40 million. 1113 00:55:44,925 --> 00:55:47,552 - I can get the appropriation. - But how? 1114 00:55:48,512 --> 00:55:50,657 I want to know how are you gonna get the approval of Congress 1115 00:55:50,681 --> 00:55:52,409 when they're saying no to the Contras for nothing, 1116 00:55:52,433 --> 00:55:55,101 for $5 million, a request made by the President? 1117 00:55:55,185 --> 00:55:57,288 When a black approp makes it through this Subcommittee, 1118 00:55:57,312 --> 00:55:59,522 the full body has to vote on it blind. 1119 00:55:59,606 --> 00:56:01,835 They know the dollar amount, but they don't know what it's for. 1120 00:56:01,859 --> 00:56:05,862 So, theoretically, your $10 million can become 40 million 1121 00:56:05,946 --> 00:56:07,989 without anyone ever noticing but the Russian Army. 1122 00:56:08,073 --> 00:56:09,968 Because Congress wouldn't know what it was voting on. 1123 00:56:09,992 --> 00:56:11,034 That's the beauty of it! 1124 00:56:11,118 --> 00:56:12,929 All you need are the nine other Subcommittee members. 1125 00:56:12,953 --> 00:56:14,556 All I really need is the Committee Chairman. 1126 00:56:14,580 --> 00:56:16,330 - Doc Long. - Doc Long. 1127 00:56:16,665 --> 00:56:19,665 And with Doc's backing, you'll get the votes of the other Committee members. 1128 00:56:19,710 --> 00:56:20,835 - Yep. - I don't believe you. 1129 00:56:20,919 --> 00:56:22,045 I don't care. 1130 00:56:22,129 --> 00:56:23,755 And until the phone rang this morning, 1131 00:56:23,780 --> 00:56:25,739 Charlie, I didn't know I'd never heard of you. 1132 00:56:25,799 --> 00:56:27,425 Well, ask around. 1133 00:56:27,551 --> 00:56:29,677 - I did. - And what'd you find out? 1134 00:56:29,762 --> 00:56:31,510 That your greatest legislative achievement in 1135 00:56:31,534 --> 00:56:33,214 six terms was getting reelected five times. 1136 00:56:33,265 --> 00:56:34,390 Anything else? 1137 00:56:34,475 --> 00:56:36,768 That you hold more IOUs than any member of the House. 1138 00:56:36,852 --> 00:56:37,894 (LAUGHING) 1139 00:56:37,978 --> 00:56:39,520 How about that? 1140 00:56:39,688 --> 00:56:43,316 I represent the only district in America that doesn't want anything. 1141 00:56:43,400 --> 00:56:46,319 They want their guns, they want low taxes, that's it. 1142 00:56:46,403 --> 00:56:49,197 I can do favors. I get to vote yes a lot. 1143 00:56:51,366 --> 00:56:54,577 Now, me and three other guys are killing Russians. 1144 00:56:54,661 --> 00:56:55,912 I mean, is it possible 1145 00:56:55,996 --> 00:56:59,791 that I've met the only elected official in town who can help? 1146 00:57:01,668 --> 00:57:04,003 Give me a week to set things up. 1147 00:57:04,088 --> 00:57:07,799 Go pack a bag. I have a friend, an arms dealer in Israel. 1148 00:57:08,258 --> 00:57:10,218 He's who we need for this, God help us. 1149 00:57:10,302 --> 00:57:12,512 - Should be interesting. - Yeah. 1150 00:57:13,388 --> 00:57:14,430 All right. 1151 00:57:15,724 --> 00:57:17,225 CHARLIE: We need you, Zvi. 1152 00:57:17,309 --> 00:57:19,519 You're gonna be our man inside the Israeli Parliament. 1153 00:57:19,853 --> 00:57:23,648 - ZVI: I'm not in the Israeli Parliament. - That's what's gonna make you so effective. 1154 00:57:23,774 --> 00:57:26,067 No one has your pull with the 10th Knesset. 1155 00:57:26,151 --> 00:57:28,236 No one has your relationship with the Speaker. 1156 00:57:28,320 --> 00:57:30,590 And we are gonna... We're gonna need your arm around Menachem, 1157 00:57:30,614 --> 00:57:34,492 when he finds out that we're working with Egypt and the Saudis. 1158 00:57:34,910 --> 00:57:37,787 Tell him. Tell him why we need him. 1159 00:57:38,288 --> 00:57:40,873 - GUS: I'm not saying anything. - Why not? 1160 00:57:41,208 --> 00:57:43,835 I don't know who the fuck these two other guys are. 1161 00:57:43,919 --> 00:57:46,003 - Well, ain't they bodyguards? - Not ours. 1162 00:57:46,088 --> 00:57:47,171 Zvi? 1163 00:57:51,343 --> 00:57:54,011 Now, just to sum this up in a nutshell. 1164 00:57:54,596 --> 00:57:57,181 You want me to move Israel 1165 00:57:57,766 --> 00:58:02,436 toward a partnership with Egypt, Pakistan and Afghanistan. 1166 00:58:02,521 --> 00:58:04,105 And Saudi Arabia. 1167 00:58:05,774 --> 00:58:08,651 Well, just a couple of problems I can foresee off the top of my head. 1168 00:58:08,735 --> 00:58:09,861 Look. 1169 00:58:09,945 --> 00:58:11,028 - Charlie... - I know. 1170 00:58:11,113 --> 00:58:15,283 Pakistan and Afghanistan don't recognize our right to exist. 1171 00:58:15,367 --> 00:58:19,203 - Calm down. - We just got done fighting a war with Egypt 1172 00:58:19,288 --> 00:58:22,623 and every person who has ever tried to kill me and my family, 1173 00:58:22,708 --> 00:58:24,709 has been trained in Saudi Arabia. 1174 00:58:24,793 --> 00:58:27,003 That's not entirely true, Zvi. 1175 00:58:27,296 --> 00:58:29,505 I mean, some of them were trained by us. 1176 00:58:29,590 --> 00:58:31,048 CHARLIE: Gus, come on. 1177 00:58:32,134 --> 00:58:35,136 It's his sense of humor. It's a bit of an acquired taste. 1178 00:58:35,220 --> 00:58:37,263 Now, Zvi, look at me. 1179 00:58:37,806 --> 00:58:40,641 This is the front of the Cold War. 1180 00:58:40,726 --> 00:58:43,686 It's not in Berlin, it's not in Cuba, it's not in Czechoslovakia. 1181 00:58:43,770 --> 00:58:46,314 It's in a pile of rocks called Afghanistan. 1182 00:58:46,398 --> 00:58:49,043 These are the only people who are actually shooting at the Russians. 1183 00:58:49,067 --> 00:58:51,861 Now, you and I know we have to get Soviet-made weapons 1184 00:58:51,945 --> 00:58:53,279 into the hands of the mujahideen. 1185 00:58:53,363 --> 00:58:55,133 And you and I know where the largest stockpile 1186 00:58:55,157 --> 00:58:58,034 of Soviet weapons outside the Soviet Union is. 1187 00:58:58,118 --> 00:58:59,702 I can't tell you offhand how many 1188 00:58:59,786 --> 00:59:02,038 and what kind of weapons we've confiscated. 1189 00:59:02,122 --> 00:59:06,417 I can. These are Keyhole-11 satellite photos. 1190 00:59:07,211 --> 00:59:10,296 They've been degraded so I can show them to you. 1191 00:59:10,464 --> 00:59:12,834 All right, that's a five-wheeled chassis tank. 1192 00:59:12,859 --> 00:59:14,824 That's not the Mk. 1, that's the T-55. 1193 00:59:14,885 --> 00:59:17,845 And it and four others are about 12 Miles from here. 1194 00:59:17,930 --> 00:59:20,181 What do you want tanks in mountains for? 1195 00:59:20,265 --> 00:59:22,683 Oh, we don't. I just wanted you to know I know you got them. 1196 00:59:22,768 --> 00:59:26,145 - $35.5 million. - Which you'll be able to appropriate. 1197 00:59:26,355 --> 00:59:27,396 Yeah. 1198 00:59:27,481 --> 00:59:29,398 Without the press asking questions about it. 1199 00:59:29,483 --> 00:59:30,585 GUS: You know, there's good news there, 1200 00:59:30,609 --> 00:59:33,402 because the press is going to be busy asking about a weekend in Vegas 1201 00:59:33,487 --> 00:59:35,863 and his pending arrest on charges of narcotics possession. 1202 00:59:35,948 --> 00:59:38,950 - Oh, Gus. - Shit, Charlie. 1203 00:59:39,034 --> 00:59:41,077 - It's nothing. - Is this true? 1204 00:59:41,161 --> 00:59:43,246 GUS: No, for our purposes, it doesn't really matter. 1205 00:59:43,330 --> 00:59:45,010 - Thank you. - I was just explaining to him 1206 00:59:45,082 --> 00:59:47,268 that as long as the press sees sex and drugs behind the left hand, 1207 00:59:47,292 --> 00:59:49,020 you can park a battle carrier behind the right hand 1208 00:59:49,044 --> 00:59:50,355 and no one's gonna fucking notice. 1209 00:59:50,379 --> 00:59:51,504 What the hell happened? 1210 00:59:51,588 --> 00:59:53,483 It's not germane. It's not germane to these people 1211 00:59:53,507 --> 00:59:56,926 who are fighting and dying, and being massacred in their homes. 1212 00:59:57,010 --> 01:00:00,054 Now, for the love of Christ, will you help us help them 1213 01:00:00,138 --> 01:00:02,682 shoot down these fucking helicopters? 1214 01:00:05,018 --> 01:00:06,769 I love you, Charlie, 1215 01:00:07,688 --> 01:00:09,605 but you are a grown man 1216 01:00:09,898 --> 01:00:14,735 who still hasn't learned to look both ways before he crosses the fucking street! 1217 01:00:21,285 --> 01:00:22,702 Yes, I'm in. 1218 01:00:24,913 --> 01:00:28,082 - But I don't like this guy. - I know how you feel. 1219 01:00:29,668 --> 01:00:32,628 - ZVI: What happens now? - You come with us to Cairo. 1220 01:00:32,713 --> 01:00:35,024 - This meeting's gonna be run professional? - Oh, absolutely. 1221 01:00:35,048 --> 01:00:37,091 We'll be talking to the Deputy Defense Minister 1222 01:00:37,175 --> 01:00:40,469 while his boss gets a belly dance from a friend of Charlie's. 1223 01:00:40,554 --> 01:00:42,596 - What? - A good friend of mine back in Texas 1224 01:00:42,681 --> 01:00:43,841 is a well-known belly dancer. 1225 01:00:43,890 --> 01:00:47,476 It's always been her dream to perform in Egypt, so she's our way in. 1226 01:00:47,561 --> 01:00:51,480 While she's dancing for the Defense Minister, we'll be talking to the Deputy. 1227 01:00:51,565 --> 01:00:53,899 - Oh, my God. - No, she's supposed to be good. 1228 01:00:54,234 --> 01:00:57,570 (ARABIC MUSIC PLAYING) 1229 01:01:29,936 --> 01:01:32,772 - That's an extraordinary woman. - Oh, yeah. 1230 01:01:37,110 --> 01:01:39,695 That's not any belly dance I'm familiar with. 1231 01:01:39,780 --> 01:01:43,074 That's why I wanted the Defense Minister to see her. 1232 01:01:43,283 --> 01:01:46,869 - This is your girlfriend? - Carol's a friend. She's an old friend. 1233 01:01:46,953 --> 01:01:50,539 I understand her father didn't allow dancing because of the religion? 1234 01:01:50,624 --> 01:01:53,376 Yeah, that's correct. 1235 01:01:53,460 --> 01:01:56,921 - And what religion is that? - You know, she's a Baptist. 1236 01:01:58,590 --> 01:02:03,219 As I was saying, the Russians will learn, I'm quite afraid the hard way, 1237 01:02:03,303 --> 01:02:05,721 to fear God's vengeance upon those 1238 01:02:05,806 --> 01:02:09,558 who oppress his humble servants who submit to him in Islam. 1239 01:02:09,810 --> 01:02:12,645 Their skulls will hang from the treetops. 1240 01:02:12,729 --> 01:02:16,315 You can do whatever you like with their skulls, I suppose. 1241 01:02:16,483 --> 01:02:22,405 What has Gus here concerned is a SA surface-to-air missiles you all have. 1242 01:02:22,489 --> 01:02:24,300 For some reason, he thinks they were stored poorly. 1243 01:02:24,324 --> 01:02:26,742 No, no, no, the SA-7s were stored properly. 1244 01:02:26,827 --> 01:02:30,579 Excuse me. What about the oppression of my people? 1245 01:02:30,664 --> 01:02:32,248 - Oh, Zvi. - I beg your pardon? 1246 01:02:32,332 --> 01:02:33,833 Fellows, we have to do this now. 1247 01:02:33,917 --> 01:02:38,421 I am about to arrange for $35 million worth of guns 1248 01:02:38,505 --> 01:02:40,089 to be put into the hands of Muslims! 1249 01:02:40,173 --> 01:02:43,509 - I meant no disrespect. - Oh, really? 1250 01:02:43,593 --> 01:02:46,095 CHARLIE: Well, anyway, that... None of this is important. 1251 01:02:46,179 --> 01:02:49,181 You have Soviet-licensed factories that can put out Kalashnikovs 1252 01:02:49,266 --> 01:02:51,183 at a rate of 25,000 a week? 1253 01:02:51,268 --> 01:02:54,353 - That's correct. - What about city warfare devices? 1254 01:02:54,438 --> 01:02:56,439 - What kind? - Bicycle bombs, limpet mines, 1255 01:02:56,523 --> 01:02:57,773 plastic, tripwire mines? 1256 01:02:57,858 --> 01:03:00,025 Yes, yes. Whatever you need. 1257 01:03:02,362 --> 01:03:04,113 CHARLIE: We can't improve the price now, 1258 01:03:04,197 --> 01:03:07,658 but when we come back for more, we'll make it up to you. 1259 01:03:07,784 --> 01:03:08,993 I agree. 1260 01:03:09,703 --> 01:03:11,036 All right. 1261 01:03:21,506 --> 01:03:25,050 Hey, you did good back there ignoring the religious shit. 1262 01:03:26,011 --> 01:03:27,971 'Cause these people are totally fucking unspooled, 1263 01:03:28,013 --> 01:03:30,890 and I'm not just talking about the Muslims. 1264 01:03:31,349 --> 01:03:33,851 - Zvi's all right. - Oh, I know he is. 1265 01:03:34,186 --> 01:03:35,311 He is Mossad, by the way. 1266 01:03:35,395 --> 01:03:38,564 What I'm talking about is your friend in Houston. 1267 01:03:38,857 --> 01:03:42,902 Now, she's got to stop throwing fundraisers and she's got to stop doing press. 1268 01:03:42,986 --> 01:03:45,488 Joanne is raising awareness. 1269 01:03:45,572 --> 01:03:46,989 (CHUCKLES) 1270 01:03:48,074 --> 01:03:52,745 She's using a non-secular vocabulary 1271 01:03:53,079 --> 01:03:55,581 and framing this as a religious war. 1272 01:03:56,708 --> 01:03:59,001 And America doesn't fight religious wars. 1273 01:03:59,085 --> 01:04:00,169 (SIGHING) 1274 01:04:00,253 --> 01:04:02,671 - Is that right? - Yeah, that's why I like living there. 1275 01:04:02,756 --> 01:04:05,636 FLIGHT CAPTAIN: Good morning, ladies and gentlemen. This is your Captain. 1276 01:04:05,675 --> 01:04:07,426 We will begin our initial descent 1277 01:04:07,552 --> 01:04:10,846 - into Washington Dulles Airport. - I got to go down to Houston, so... 1278 01:04:10,931 --> 01:04:13,015 I would like to thank you and hope... 1279 01:04:13,099 --> 01:04:15,935 - Well, talk to her. - Yeah, I'll talk to her. 1280 01:04:19,439 --> 01:04:21,941 You want me to go into business with the Israelis? 1281 01:04:22,025 --> 01:04:24,276 Just for this one purpose, yes, Mr. President. 1282 01:04:24,402 --> 01:04:28,864 The Israelis have the largest stockpile of Soviet-made weapons in friendly hands. 1283 01:04:28,949 --> 01:04:30,407 I know that. 1284 01:04:31,117 --> 01:04:34,537 I need to trust that this arrangement will remain secret. 1285 01:04:34,621 --> 01:04:38,874 Pakistan and Israel would have to appear to be enemies in the public eye. 1286 01:04:38,959 --> 01:04:41,460 Yeah, I don't think that's a tough sell. 1287 01:04:41,545 --> 01:04:43,212 You have authority to do this? 1288 01:04:43,296 --> 01:04:46,382 None whatsoever. In fact, I'm pretty close to violating the Logan Act. 1289 01:04:46,466 --> 01:04:48,384 Well, I don't know what that is. 1290 01:04:48,468 --> 01:04:49,802 - But, Charlie. - Yes, sir. 1291 01:04:49,928 --> 01:04:52,805 If I see one fucking Star of David on a crate... 1292 01:04:52,889 --> 01:04:54,640 You won't. I promise. 1293 01:04:56,601 --> 01:04:57,643 - Hey. - Excuse me. 1294 01:04:57,769 --> 01:05:00,479 You want me to take a look at those remarks? 1295 01:05:00,605 --> 01:05:02,565 - Why? - Just... Well, your introduction, 1296 01:05:02,649 --> 01:05:06,986 - want me to look it over? - It's an introduction, Charlie. I'll be fine. 1297 01:05:14,828 --> 01:05:18,497 Today we honor President Zia ul-Haq of Pakistan. 1298 01:05:18,999 --> 01:05:21,625 (AUDIENCE APPLAUDING) 1299 01:05:32,137 --> 01:05:35,848 Before we go any further, I would like you all to know this, 1300 01:05:36,182 --> 01:05:38,642 President Zia did not kill Bhutto. 1301 01:05:39,811 --> 01:05:41,478 In the time that he's been President, 1302 01:05:41,563 --> 01:05:44,481 the fortunes of Pakistan have changed radically. 1303 01:05:44,566 --> 01:05:45,846 I've asked you all here today... 1304 01:05:47,235 --> 01:05:49,236 (CROWD CHATTERING) 1305 01:05:51,364 --> 01:05:53,657 (CUTLERY CLINKING) 1306 01:05:54,534 --> 01:05:58,454 - You disappeared. - Well, they weren't selling alcohol in there. 1307 01:05:58,538 --> 01:06:00,998 It's a traditional Pakistani gathering. 1308 01:06:01,082 --> 01:06:02,962 You think they might be a lot happier over there 1309 01:06:03,001 --> 01:06:06,295 if they could just get women and booze in the same room at the same time? 1310 01:06:06,379 --> 01:06:08,232 I think they'd be a whole lot happier over there 1311 01:06:08,256 --> 01:06:09,715 if the Communists got out. 1312 01:06:09,841 --> 01:06:12,384 "Zia did not kill Bhutto." 1313 01:06:12,844 --> 01:06:16,305 That's not something you usually hear in introductory remarks. 1314 01:06:16,389 --> 01:06:19,808 He didn't, Charlie. Bhutto had a trial and was found guilty. 1315 01:06:19,893 --> 01:06:21,560 Shocking verdict. 1316 01:06:22,395 --> 01:06:25,022 What did you need to talk to me about? 1317 01:06:25,857 --> 01:06:29,568 Joanne, darling, dial down the religion. 1318 01:06:29,903 --> 01:06:32,196 - What? - It could alienate people 1319 01:06:32,280 --> 01:06:33,989 whose support we need. 1320 01:06:34,074 --> 01:06:36,784 It's luncheons like this that are raising the money we need. 1321 01:06:36,910 --> 01:06:39,703 This thing is not gonna get done by ballrooms full of people 1322 01:06:39,788 --> 01:06:40,996 in the Houstonian Hotel. 1323 01:06:41,081 --> 01:06:44,458 It's gonna get done by the CIA, Israel, Egypt and Pakistan, 1324 01:06:44,584 --> 01:06:46,168 and it's gonna get done quietly. 1325 01:06:46,252 --> 01:06:47,586 Now, you start making people think 1326 01:06:47,712 --> 01:06:50,130 we're trying to convert everybody to Christianity. 1327 01:06:50,256 --> 01:06:53,384 I was saved by Jesus Christ, Charlie, and I am not ashamed of it. 1328 01:06:53,468 --> 01:06:56,679 My fervor is not about religion, it's about freedom of religion, 1329 01:06:56,763 --> 01:06:57,846 which we have, they want, 1330 01:06:57,931 --> 01:07:00,182 and the Communists are slaughtering them for. 1331 01:07:00,266 --> 01:07:03,560 And I get it. Just tamp down the fervor. 1332 01:07:04,562 --> 01:07:07,439 Well, I can't modulate God's will, sweetie. 1333 01:07:07,732 --> 01:07:09,108 You can try. 1334 01:07:09,984 --> 01:07:13,570 Now, I got to get back to D.C. They've set up a briefing for me at Langley. 1335 01:07:13,655 --> 01:07:16,073 - On what? - On getting the guns. 1336 01:07:18,743 --> 01:07:20,452 Afghanistan's barely a country. 1337 01:07:20,578 --> 01:07:22,788 There's no phones or roads outside the cities. 1338 01:07:22,914 --> 01:07:24,392 It's likely that a villager would live his life 1339 01:07:24,416 --> 01:07:26,977 without having contact with another village just three Miles down the road 1340 01:07:27,001 --> 01:07:29,044 unless he was going to war against them. 1341 01:07:29,129 --> 01:07:31,755 Now, my thinking is instead of 400,000 sloppy guys, 1342 01:07:31,840 --> 01:07:35,551 we concentrate on several elite forces totaling about 150,000. 1343 01:07:35,635 --> 01:07:37,094 Give these guys real training, 1344 01:07:37,178 --> 01:07:40,097 20 different courses covering irregular warfare disciplines. 1345 01:07:40,181 --> 01:07:41,724 GUS: And do you have anybody in mind? 1346 01:07:41,808 --> 01:07:44,893 The most successful rebels today are in the Panjshir Valley. 1347 01:07:44,978 --> 01:07:47,479 They're called the United Front of the Council of the North. 1348 01:07:47,605 --> 01:07:49,565 We've earmarked them for 10 million in weapons 1349 01:07:49,649 --> 01:07:52,234 and 10 to 15 agency advisors for training. 1350 01:07:52,318 --> 01:07:55,404 - CHARLIE: Who's their leader? - Ahmed Shah Massoud. 1351 01:07:55,488 --> 01:07:58,949 He's Tajik, so he's not well liked by the Pashtun. 1352 01:07:59,033 --> 01:08:02,161 CHARLIE: So the... What, the Tajiks have a problem with the Pashtuns? 1353 01:08:02,287 --> 01:08:04,473 Well, they say when a Tajik wants to make love to a woman, 1354 01:08:04,497 --> 01:08:07,332 his first choice is always a Pashtun man. 1355 01:08:08,710 --> 01:08:11,211 It's funnier in the original Pashto. 1356 01:08:11,504 --> 01:08:15,215 All right, I've heard enough. I'm going to go get our money. 1357 01:08:15,508 --> 01:08:17,843 All right, don't fuck us up now. 1358 01:08:18,678 --> 01:08:19,803 Awesome pep talk. 1359 01:08:19,888 --> 01:08:24,141 Afghanistan, Egypt, Pakistan and Saudi Arabia, 1360 01:08:24,225 --> 01:08:26,977 these are all totalitarian dictatorships. 1361 01:08:27,061 --> 01:08:31,482 And they'd like to blow the only democracy in the region right into the Mediterranean. 1362 01:08:31,566 --> 01:08:34,651 Now, you heard me say that Israel's gonna be on board. 1363 01:08:34,736 --> 01:08:37,404 Oh, well, Zvi Rafiah's out of his mind. 1364 01:08:37,697 --> 01:08:41,742 These people are draconian thugs, and in an evil and twisted derby 1365 01:08:41,868 --> 01:08:44,161 between the Communists and the Fundamentalists, 1366 01:08:44,245 --> 01:08:45,912 it's 6-to-5 and pick them, as far as I'm concerned. 1367 01:08:45,914 --> 01:08:48,350 No, you're wrong about that, Doc, and you know you don't mean it. 1368 01:08:48,374 --> 01:08:52,169 In Pakistan, a blind girl gets raped, but there's a witness. 1369 01:08:52,253 --> 01:08:54,713 Now, in Pakistan it takes four witnesses. 1370 01:08:54,839 --> 01:08:57,216 So the rapist walks away and the girl is in prison. 1371 01:08:57,342 --> 01:08:58,842 Can you tell me why? 1372 01:08:58,927 --> 01:09:01,637 - Well, fornication. - That's right. 1373 01:09:01,721 --> 01:09:04,723 Mr. Chairman, President Zia is the only one willing to shoulder the risk 1374 01:09:04,849 --> 01:09:07,976 of actively training and funding the mujahideen 1375 01:09:08,061 --> 01:09:09,394 while Egypt and Saudi Arabia... 1376 01:09:09,521 --> 01:09:12,189 Now, the Saudis are matching any funding from Congress? 1377 01:09:12,273 --> 01:09:14,817 - That's right. - So when you say 40 million to me, 1378 01:09:14,901 --> 01:09:16,212 you're really talking about 80 million. 1379 01:09:16,236 --> 01:09:17,319 Only 40 from us. 1380 01:09:17,403 --> 01:09:19,548 You want to put $80 million in the hands of these people? 1381 01:09:19,572 --> 01:09:21,759 No, see, Doc, now, if you took a trip with me to the border, 1382 01:09:21,783 --> 01:09:23,450 you'd stop calling them "these people." 1383 01:09:23,576 --> 01:09:27,037 They are farmers and children mostly, and they are fighting our enemies for us. 1384 01:09:27,121 --> 01:09:28,682 - I know. - And that should be impossible for America. 1385 01:09:28,706 --> 01:09:30,546 - I know. - It should be impossible for America 1386 01:09:30,625 --> 01:09:34,211 to sit on the bench while little kids and their mothers fight our enemies. 1387 01:09:34,295 --> 01:09:37,089 Now, all you have to do to change that is to support me 1388 01:09:37,215 --> 01:09:38,632 in the Committee, Mr. Chairman. 1389 01:09:38,758 --> 01:09:43,053 I'm sorry, Charlie, but doubling from 5 to 10 million is one thing, 1390 01:09:43,137 --> 01:09:45,889 but, you know, I just can't get behind this. 1391 01:09:45,974 --> 01:09:47,432 (PHONE RINGING) 1392 01:09:49,143 --> 01:09:51,895 TRISH: Joanne Herring's residence. Who's speaking? 1393 01:09:51,980 --> 01:09:54,773 Miss Herring, Congressman Wilson for you. 1394 01:09:57,277 --> 01:09:58,694 - Hello. - CHARLIE: Hey. 1395 01:09:58,820 --> 01:09:59,903 Tell me what's happening. 1396 01:09:59,988 --> 01:10:03,115 Well, I need Doc Long, and he's not getting on board. 1397 01:10:03,199 --> 01:10:06,243 Now, he's a church-going guy, so I thought, 1398 01:10:06,327 --> 01:10:08,407 - you know, maybe you could... - So now you need God. 1399 01:10:08,955 --> 01:10:11,206 Yeah. Let me give you his private line. 1400 01:10:11,624 --> 01:10:13,041 I've got it. 1401 01:10:13,126 --> 01:10:14,710 (BREATHING HEAVILY) 1402 01:10:14,836 --> 01:10:16,128 - Trish! - Yes, ma'am. 1403 01:10:16,629 --> 01:10:18,130 - Boss? - Yeah. 1404 01:10:18,214 --> 01:10:21,341 - Hey, that's a nice sweater. - Oh, thank you. 1405 01:10:21,467 --> 01:10:23,946 The Washington Times wants to know if you've ever been in rehab. 1406 01:10:23,970 --> 01:10:25,990 - Well, what are you gonna tell them? - That you won't go to rehab 1407 01:10:26,014 --> 01:10:27,324 'cause they don't serve whiskey there. 1408 01:10:27,348 --> 01:10:29,516 Well, that's why you're the press secretary, boo-boo. 1409 01:10:29,642 --> 01:10:32,811 - I've got Stu on the line. Can you jump on? - Yeah. 1410 01:10:33,021 --> 01:10:34,688 Hey, Stu, it's me. 1411 01:10:34,981 --> 01:10:36,315 All right. 1412 01:10:36,482 --> 01:10:40,152 No, she's not a stripper, Stu. She just posed for the cover... 1413 01:10:40,236 --> 01:10:44,114 Oh, what the hell difference does it make? They're talking to Crystal today. 1414 01:10:44,198 --> 01:10:45,324 Yeah. 1415 01:10:45,491 --> 01:10:47,993 Giuliani subpoenaed the limo driver. 1416 01:10:48,328 --> 01:10:49,953 Oh, that's what Gus said he'd do. 1417 01:10:50,038 --> 01:10:52,122 Well, the limo driver said he didn't see anything. 1418 01:10:52,206 --> 01:10:53,332 He didn't see anything. 1419 01:10:53,416 --> 01:10:55,542 So Giuliani subpoenaed every limo driver 1420 01:10:55,668 --> 01:10:58,195 between Arlington and Silver Spring to see 1421 01:10:58,220 --> 01:11:00,863 if any of them can recall you using cocaine. 1422 01:11:01,174 --> 01:11:04,927 - Joanne Herring's on the phone. - Hey, you. 1423 01:11:05,219 --> 01:11:06,511 We're all leaving in the morning. 1424 01:11:06,596 --> 01:11:08,013 - You're kidding? - No. 1425 01:11:08,681 --> 01:11:10,891 Well, what did you have to promise him? 1426 01:11:11,017 --> 01:11:13,435 There's a blind girl in jail 'cause she was raped. 1427 01:11:13,519 --> 01:11:15,020 - Yeah. - You're gonna get her out. 1428 01:11:15,271 --> 01:11:17,397 What, I got to bust somebody out of jail? 1429 01:11:17,523 --> 01:11:19,710 Don't be stupid, Charlie. You're gonna tell Zia to pardon her. 1430 01:11:19,734 --> 01:11:21,443 That's Doc's condition. 1431 01:11:21,527 --> 01:11:25,030 - I'll fly in tonight. Buy me a drink? - Yes, ma'am. 1432 01:11:25,531 --> 01:11:27,616 We're almost there, Charlie. 1433 01:11:31,537 --> 01:11:35,332 - I'm going back to Pakistan tomorrow! - GIRLS: Let's party! 1434 01:11:35,416 --> 01:11:36,750 (GIRLS WHOOPING) 1435 01:11:36,876 --> 01:11:38,752 (DISCO MUSIC PLAYING ON STEREO) 1436 01:11:40,713 --> 01:11:41,941 - Charlie! - Oh, that was... I'm gonna... 1437 01:11:41,965 --> 01:11:43,359 - You want a refill here, darling? - Thanks. 1438 01:11:43,383 --> 01:11:45,008 Can we get another round? 1439 01:11:45,093 --> 01:11:46,218 Mario! 1440 01:11:46,761 --> 01:11:49,096 Oh, Charlie. 1441 01:11:54,727 --> 01:11:56,103 Hey, Joanne. 1442 01:11:57,730 --> 01:11:59,898 - Can I call you Joanne? - Yes. 1443 01:12:01,609 --> 01:12:03,777 You'll want to dress considerably more modestly 1444 01:12:03,903 --> 01:12:05,195 when we're at the border. 1445 01:12:05,279 --> 01:12:08,490 Well, thank you, but I have been passionately involved 1446 01:12:08,574 --> 01:12:10,414 with the 'cause of the Afghans for three years. 1447 01:12:10,493 --> 01:12:12,202 I've been there many times. 1448 01:12:12,286 --> 01:12:14,371 Okay, well, then I'll just go fuck myself. 1449 01:12:14,455 --> 01:12:17,124 I am not easily shocked, Mr. Avrakotos. 1450 01:12:17,917 --> 01:12:20,419 I knew you two were gonna hit it off right away. 1451 01:12:20,503 --> 01:12:21,753 Charlie! 1452 01:12:21,921 --> 01:12:25,007 Sorry, Stu's on the phone. You can take it at the bar. 1453 01:12:25,091 --> 01:12:27,968 Stu. This can't be good. 1454 01:12:30,638 --> 01:12:32,597 How'd you hook up with Charlie? 1455 01:12:32,682 --> 01:12:35,600 Are you also passionately involved with the 'cause of the Afghans? 1456 01:12:35,685 --> 01:12:38,603 No, I just wasn't really doing anything else. 1457 01:12:38,688 --> 01:12:41,064 I mean, how did you get into the CIA? 1458 01:12:41,149 --> 01:12:43,942 Oh, I didn't. I'm with the Department of Agriculture. 1459 01:12:44,027 --> 01:12:47,112 - Food and Plant Division. - Specifically apple imports. 1460 01:12:47,196 --> 01:12:50,449 - Now, you don't seem like the apple type. - I know. 1461 01:12:52,118 --> 01:12:53,118 What's that mean? 1462 01:12:54,954 --> 01:12:57,539 - Where are you from? - What do you care? 1463 01:12:57,623 --> 01:13:00,292 - Are you a Catholic? - Greek Orthodox, Mrs. Herring. 1464 01:13:00,376 --> 01:13:03,295 - That's still Christian. - Imagine my relief. 1465 01:13:04,130 --> 01:13:05,964 What's your problem with me? 1466 01:13:06,049 --> 01:13:07,966 You know, I've found, in my business, 1467 01:13:08,051 --> 01:13:11,553 that when people with time on their hands get involved in politics, 1468 01:13:11,637 --> 01:13:14,264 I start forgetting what I'm supposed to be shooting at. 1469 01:13:14,348 --> 01:13:16,516 That would be in the apple import business. 1470 01:13:16,642 --> 01:13:17,976 Yes, ma'am. 1471 01:13:18,061 --> 01:13:20,312 - I'll have to remember that. - Please do. 1472 01:13:20,897 --> 01:13:22,230 It's over! 1473 01:13:22,398 --> 01:13:24,399 (CHARLIE LAUGHING) 1474 01:13:24,484 --> 01:13:26,735 It's over! It is over! 1475 01:13:26,819 --> 01:13:29,988 - That was Stu, and it is over. - Wait, wait, wait. Crystal didn't name you? 1476 01:13:30,073 --> 01:13:32,365 Well, she witnessed me doing coke 1477 01:13:32,492 --> 01:13:34,284 - in the Cayman Islands. - Oh, shit, Charlie. 1478 01:13:34,368 --> 01:13:37,579 No, it's all right. That's out of the Justice Department's jurisdiction, 1479 01:13:37,663 --> 01:13:39,164 so it is over. 1480 01:13:39,665 --> 01:13:41,166 CHARLIE: I'm going home! 1481 01:13:42,502 --> 01:13:47,380 Gus, Joanne, the most important trip of our lives is in the morning, 1482 01:13:47,507 --> 01:13:49,758 so let's get plenty of sleep. I'm going home. 1483 01:13:49,842 --> 01:13:52,177 - Jailbait, slap my hands! - Yeah! 1484 01:13:52,678 --> 01:13:54,387 Mario, this is all on me. 1485 01:13:54,514 --> 01:13:55,722 Yes, sir. 1486 01:13:56,349 --> 01:13:59,101 He may be in trouble with the press, but he stayed out of jail. 1487 01:13:59,185 --> 01:14:00,894 You don't see God's hand in this? 1488 01:14:01,020 --> 01:14:02,729 Well, reasonable people can disagree, 1489 01:14:02,855 --> 01:14:05,649 but I don't see God anywhere within Miles of this. 1490 01:14:05,733 --> 01:14:07,503 On the other hand, if you slept with me tonight, 1491 01:14:07,527 --> 01:14:10,028 I bet you I could change my mind in a hurry. 1492 01:14:10,113 --> 01:14:11,905 - Oh, you would. - Yeah. 1493 01:14:15,368 --> 01:14:17,369 I'll see you on the plane. 1494 01:14:21,541 --> 01:14:22,958 (GIRLS LAUGHING) 1495 01:14:23,042 --> 01:14:24,668 (MUSIC CONTINUES PLAYING) 1496 01:14:24,752 --> 01:14:25,877 Sluts. 1497 01:14:29,298 --> 01:14:31,508 (PEOPLE CHATTERING) 1498 01:14:31,968 --> 01:14:34,594 (CHARLIE CHATTERING) 1499 01:14:41,894 --> 01:14:43,061 (GASPS) 1500 01:14:43,271 --> 01:14:44,980 (CHILDREN CHANTING) 1501 01:14:51,195 --> 01:14:53,280 - Doc's eating this up. - Yeah? 1502 01:14:53,364 --> 01:14:55,907 - We're gonna get the money. - DOC: Charlie? 1503 01:14:57,451 --> 01:14:58,702 Charlie! 1504 01:14:59,203 --> 01:15:00,996 - Guy's a little senile. - Don't be fooled. 1505 01:15:01,080 --> 01:15:02,581 He chairs a Subcommittee? 1506 01:15:02,665 --> 01:15:07,085 Charlie, Joanne, this has been an absolutely eye-opening experience. 1507 01:15:07,170 --> 01:15:08,962 I mean, it's absolutely stunning. 1508 01:15:09,046 --> 01:15:12,340 Tell them what we saw, Mr. Papadropolous. Tell them. 1509 01:15:13,467 --> 01:15:17,179 - They only want to go back there and fight. - And you're their savior, Mr. Chairman. 1510 01:15:17,263 --> 01:15:19,103 - Oh, I wouldn't go that far, no. - Watch this. 1511 01:15:19,182 --> 01:15:20,409 - She's gonna lock it right on up. - JOANNE: Mr. Chairman, 1512 01:15:20,433 --> 01:15:23,560 these people have been waiting for you. They have been sitting here 1513 01:15:23,644 --> 01:15:26,688 and bleeding and waiting and praying for you. 1514 01:15:26,981 --> 01:15:30,275 It's only gonna be a man like you who can save them. 1515 01:15:30,651 --> 01:15:33,236 We know, don't we, about our men, 1516 01:15:33,613 --> 01:15:36,281 what they can do when they summon themselves. 1517 01:15:36,365 --> 01:15:38,617 Charlie, I think they want you to make some remarks. 1518 01:15:38,701 --> 01:15:41,036 No, you should do it, Mr. Chairman. 1519 01:15:41,120 --> 01:15:44,039 These people have been waiting a long time for you. 1520 01:15:44,123 --> 01:15:46,124 Show Muriel what you can do. Show your wife. 1521 01:15:46,209 --> 01:15:49,377 I'm a little bit emotional about what I've seen here today. 1522 01:15:49,462 --> 01:15:50,712 Show her. 1523 01:15:52,715 --> 01:15:54,216 You can do it. 1524 01:15:55,760 --> 01:15:56,927 Go on. 1525 01:15:57,762 --> 01:15:59,095 All right. 1526 01:16:03,142 --> 01:16:06,353 - Papadropolous. - Well, it's Greek. It's in the ballpark. 1527 01:16:06,437 --> 01:16:07,479 DOC: My friends, 1528 01:16:07,563 --> 01:16:08,665 (MAN TRANSLATING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE) 1529 01:16:08,689 --> 01:16:11,608 my son served in Vietnam. 1530 01:16:11,692 --> 01:16:16,696 He was wounded fighting in battle against the Soviet oppressors. 1531 01:16:16,781 --> 01:16:18,573 I didn't know that about his son. 1532 01:16:18,658 --> 01:16:20,992 So, you see, I'm no stranger, 1533 01:16:21,077 --> 01:16:25,121 no stranger at all to the horrors and atrocities of the Communists! 1534 01:16:25,206 --> 01:16:27,666 (TRANSLATING) 1535 01:16:27,875 --> 01:16:29,376 (CROWD CHEERING) 1536 01:16:32,421 --> 01:16:34,047 Thank you so much. 1537 01:16:34,215 --> 01:16:36,591 I talk about God for one simple reason. 1538 01:16:36,676 --> 01:16:39,678 - As God is my witness today... - We need him on our side. 1539 01:16:39,762 --> 01:16:43,765 These Russian gunships, every last one of them, 1540 01:16:43,849 --> 01:16:45,976 are gonna be blown right out of the sky. 1541 01:16:46,060 --> 01:16:50,772 We're gonna see that you have guns and we're gonna see that you have training! 1542 01:16:54,485 --> 01:16:55,568 Thank you. 1543 01:16:57,363 --> 01:16:59,239 Well, what I think's got Gus worried 1544 01:16:59,323 --> 01:17:03,535 is that sooner or later God is gonna be on both sides. 1545 01:17:04,453 --> 01:17:07,831 This is good against evil. 1546 01:17:07,915 --> 01:17:11,126 And I want you to know that America's always going to be 1547 01:17:11,210 --> 01:17:13,461 on the side of the good. 1548 01:17:14,088 --> 01:17:17,507 And God will always punish the wicked! 1549 01:17:19,802 --> 01:17:22,137 (CROWD CHANTING) 1550 01:17:26,809 --> 01:17:28,601 (EXCLAIMING) 1551 01:17:30,062 --> 01:17:31,521 God is great! 1552 01:17:32,565 --> 01:17:34,024 God is great! 1553 01:18:17,818 --> 01:18:20,487 NEWSCASTER: This has been a year of setback and frustration. 1554 01:18:20,571 --> 01:18:23,050 And the Soviet Army, more than at any time since the war began, 1555 01:18:23,074 --> 01:18:24,324 (COUGHING) 1556 01:18:24,408 --> 01:18:26,201 now has the upper hand. 1557 01:18:26,285 --> 01:18:28,578 The mujahideen are pinned down. 1558 01:18:28,954 --> 01:18:32,665 The Afghan resistance has been sanctified by the United States, 1559 01:18:32,750 --> 01:18:37,128 but the support has not been translated into military hardware. 1560 01:18:37,213 --> 01:18:40,090 The guerrillas still cling to the Kalashnikov, but it's not enough. 1561 01:18:40,174 --> 01:18:41,549 (CONTINUES COUGHING) 1562 01:18:41,634 --> 01:18:44,302 They're waiting in vain for bigger modern weapons 1563 01:18:44,387 --> 01:18:46,179 to turn on the Red Army. 1564 01:18:46,263 --> 01:18:48,681 The guerrillas survived the raid. 1565 01:18:49,809 --> 01:18:53,603 The Soviets now are conducting some of the heaviest bombing of the war. 1566 01:18:53,687 --> 01:18:57,148 The Soviets have put more troops and equipment back in. 1567 01:18:57,983 --> 01:18:59,692 Communist bastards. 1568 01:18:59,777 --> 01:19:01,027 (COUGHS) 1569 01:19:08,452 --> 01:19:09,911 (MAN CHATTERING) 1570 01:19:10,538 --> 01:19:12,622 Don't send us rice and bandages, 1571 01:19:19,547 --> 01:19:22,215 It's called the Milan anti-tank missile. 1572 01:19:22,299 --> 01:19:25,093 - Can the Afghans win without it? - No. 1573 01:19:26,387 --> 01:19:27,595 End of discussion. 1574 01:19:27,680 --> 01:19:30,557 I would like to have the previously approved sum increased 1575 01:19:30,641 --> 01:19:32,600 by an additional 30 million, 1576 01:19:32,685 --> 01:19:36,396 bringing the total appropriation to 70 million. 1577 01:19:36,480 --> 01:19:39,399 I'd like to introduce the Milan anti-tank missile. 1578 01:19:39,942 --> 01:19:41,276 We've got 300 in the field. 1579 01:19:41,360 --> 01:19:42,735 - ALL: Yeah! - Yep. 1580 01:19:43,696 --> 01:19:45,697 Let's kill some Russians! 1581 01:19:48,409 --> 01:19:50,326 (LOUD EXPLOSION) 1582 01:19:57,793 --> 01:20:00,920 Voting to pump up the money for the freedom fighters is the only way 1583 01:20:01,005 --> 01:20:03,214 for the northeastern liberal to prove that he's serious. 1584 01:20:03,299 --> 01:20:04,591 How much are you asking for? 1585 01:20:04,675 --> 01:20:06,593 I'd want to go from 70 million to 100 million. 1586 01:20:06,677 --> 01:20:10,013 And if you vote for me, I can deliver the Black Caucus for the farm subsidy. 1587 01:20:23,110 --> 01:20:25,111 (MAN CHATTERING ON RADIO) 1588 01:20:37,958 --> 01:20:39,000 (SPEAKING RUSSIAN) 1589 01:21:02,900 --> 01:21:04,943 (HELICOPTER WHIRRING) 1590 01:21:09,240 --> 01:21:10,406 (SPEAKING RUSSIAN) 1591 01:21:13,619 --> 01:21:15,078 (WHISTLING) 1592 01:21:16,121 --> 01:21:18,039 (SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE) 1593 01:21:19,291 --> 01:21:20,333 (SPEAKING RUSSIAN) 1594 01:21:23,837 --> 01:21:25,588 (BEEPING) 1595 01:21:28,092 --> 01:21:29,926 (SCREAMING) 1596 01:21:33,514 --> 01:21:34,556 (SPEAKING RUSSIAN) 1597 01:21:50,197 --> 01:21:51,281 (SPEAKING RUSSIAN) 1598 01:21:59,206 --> 01:22:01,207 (SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE) 1599 01:22:03,544 --> 01:22:04,586 (SPEAKING RUSSIAN) 1600 01:22:23,272 --> 01:22:25,398 (SHOUTING) 1601 01:22:52,343 --> 01:22:54,302 MAN: And they asked him, quite reasonably enough, 1602 01:22:54,386 --> 01:22:55,803 "How did you vote on that?" 1603 01:22:55,888 --> 01:22:59,140 And I swear to God, he looks over at his staff guy. 1604 01:23:00,434 --> 01:23:03,936 He had to check with an aide for an answer to that question. 1605 01:23:04,438 --> 01:23:07,190 I don't know how that guy stays in office. 1606 01:23:07,358 --> 01:23:08,399 (LAUGHING) 1607 01:23:40,057 --> 01:23:42,100 It was the Bamian-led group. They set an ambush here 1608 01:23:42,184 --> 01:23:43,828 - at the Fuladi Bridge. - GUS: What'd they get? 1609 01:23:43,852 --> 01:23:46,437 Four supply trucks coming out of Bagram Airbase. 1610 01:23:46,897 --> 01:23:49,732 They hit a Soviet motorized rifle battalion on horseback? 1611 01:23:50,109 --> 01:23:52,694 - You bet your ass. - Then these guys are pretty good. 1612 01:24:16,760 --> 01:24:18,845 We can't control this thing anymore. 1613 01:24:18,929 --> 01:24:23,725 The man stood in my office in Islamabad, and I told him, "A sudden influx of money" 1614 01:24:23,809 --> 01:24:27,311 - "and weaponry..." - Could you hand me that belt, please? 1615 01:24:28,272 --> 01:24:30,022 - Thank you. - I mean, how is it possible 1616 01:24:30,107 --> 01:24:32,775 that this congressman of no particular importance 1617 01:24:32,860 --> 01:24:34,360 is doing this by himself? 1618 01:24:34,445 --> 01:24:36,446 I will admit it's not unimpressive. 1619 01:24:36,530 --> 01:24:39,365 Is this the war we want to be fighting, Henry? Huh? 1620 01:24:39,450 --> 01:24:44,203 Harold, whatever he's doing, believe me, it's working. 1621 01:24:44,288 --> 01:24:45,830 (MISSILE FIRING) 1622 01:25:02,222 --> 01:25:08,186 The CIA estimates that seven out of every 10 times the muj fires a Stinger, 1623 01:25:09,354 --> 01:25:11,856 a Soviet chopper or a plane falls out of the sky. 1624 01:25:11,940 --> 01:25:16,110 Now, Russian MiGs go for $20 million, Stingers go for 60-70,000. 1625 01:25:16,195 --> 01:25:17,612 What do you want to do? 1626 01:25:17,696 --> 01:25:19,447 Well, I'd like to double to 250 million. 1627 01:25:19,531 --> 01:25:22,408 Remind me again, where did this thing start? 1628 01:25:22,701 --> 01:25:24,202 5 million. 1629 01:25:24,286 --> 01:25:25,536 (MEN LAUGHING) 1630 01:25:32,252 --> 01:25:33,795 (PHONE RINGING) 1631 01:25:35,214 --> 01:25:36,339 Hello? 1632 01:25:36,423 --> 01:25:38,800 CHARLIE: Is this Mrs. Joanne King Herring Davis? 1633 01:25:39,593 --> 01:25:40,968 Where's it at, Charlie? 1634 01:25:42,387 --> 01:25:43,930 How's the honeymoon? 1635 01:25:44,473 --> 01:25:47,475 Am I ever gonna see you naked again? 1636 01:25:48,227 --> 01:25:49,393 Where's it at, Charlie? 1637 01:25:50,896 --> 01:25:54,398 500 million. Matched by the Saudis. 1638 01:25:55,067 --> 01:25:56,609 One billion dollars. 1639 01:25:56,693 --> 01:25:59,070 That's right. Billion with a "b." 1640 01:26:00,405 --> 01:26:03,157 Where does this rank relative to other covert wars? 1641 01:26:03,784 --> 01:26:05,952 There's never been anything else like it. 1642 01:26:06,036 --> 01:26:07,411 Since when? 1643 01:26:08,914 --> 01:26:10,039 Ever. 1644 01:26:11,959 --> 01:26:13,709 I miss you, Charlie. 1645 01:26:14,086 --> 01:26:15,419 I, Joanne, 1646 01:26:17,381 --> 01:26:19,006 I always miss you. 1647 01:26:23,595 --> 01:26:24,971 I better go. 1648 01:26:35,023 --> 01:26:36,501 CHARLIE: There's nothing wrong with that! 1649 01:26:36,525 --> 01:26:37,608 (DISCO MUSIC PLAYING) 1650 01:26:37,693 --> 01:26:39,879 And out in Polk, there's the polecat who took us over the side there. 1651 01:26:39,903 --> 01:26:42,572 You know, that's the truth. What do you got? 1652 01:26:42,656 --> 01:26:44,574 Is that Gus? You got it. 1653 01:26:44,658 --> 01:26:45,783 Hey, Gus! 1654 01:26:46,159 --> 01:26:48,452 - Congratulations on your reelection. - Yeah, thank you. 1655 01:26:48,537 --> 01:26:51,622 - Tell me what you know. - All right. Doc Long is gonna lose. 1656 01:26:51,707 --> 01:26:53,875 Yeah, yeah, yeah. We saw that coming. 1657 01:26:53,959 --> 01:26:56,627 Yeah, so who's gonna be our wallet now? 1658 01:26:57,170 --> 01:26:59,297 - John Murtha. - And is that good news? 1659 01:26:59,381 --> 01:27:00,715 - Yep. - Why? 1660 01:27:01,884 --> 01:27:04,594 I was his vote on the Ethics Committee. 1661 01:27:04,678 --> 01:27:06,637 (LAUGHING) 1662 01:27:06,722 --> 01:27:09,140 You know, you're a very, very easy man to like, Congressman. 1663 01:27:09,474 --> 01:27:11,392 Call me tomorrow morning at high noon. 1664 01:27:12,227 --> 01:27:13,811 (LAUGHING) I will. Bye-bye. 1665 01:27:15,230 --> 01:27:16,355 (HORSES NEIGHING) 1666 01:27:22,988 --> 01:27:24,447 (SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE) 1667 01:27:24,531 --> 01:27:27,158 We present you with this Stinger tube. 1668 01:27:27,492 --> 01:27:29,827 (MEN CHEERING) 1669 01:27:30,537 --> 01:27:32,079 (GUNS FIRING) 1670 01:27:32,998 --> 01:27:37,043 REPORTER: There was wild jubilation inside the country of Afghanistan 1671 01:27:37,169 --> 01:27:40,044 as last weekend it became the first country 1672 01:27:40,069 --> 01:27:43,073 in history to defeat the mighty Soviet Union. 1673 01:27:43,175 --> 01:27:44,842 (CROWD CHATTERING) 1674 01:27:44,927 --> 01:27:48,638 The retreat of Soviet military power from Afghanistan is complete. 1675 01:27:48,722 --> 01:27:52,224 The last of Russia's regular army invasion force is out. 1676 01:27:52,559 --> 01:27:55,353 Fear and uncertainty were mixed with joy today 1677 01:27:55,437 --> 01:27:57,188 as the commander of Soviet troops 1678 01:27:57,272 --> 01:27:59,523 followed the last of his men across the border. 1679 01:27:59,608 --> 01:28:03,194 CBS News Moscow correspondent, Barry Petersen, begins our coverage. 1680 01:28:03,278 --> 01:28:06,697 BARRY: It was the last hurrah. The final Soviet combat troops 1681 01:28:06,782 --> 01:28:08,741 crossing the Friendship Bridge on the border 1682 01:28:08,867 --> 01:28:11,285 between Afghanistan and the Soviet Union. 1683 01:28:11,370 --> 01:28:12,870 The Soviet commander, Lieutenant... 1684 01:28:12,955 --> 01:28:15,039 Look what you did, Charlie. 1685 01:28:15,415 --> 01:28:17,792 Hey, it's... Hey, hey, hey. Hey, hey! 1686 01:28:17,876 --> 01:28:21,545 It's traditional to make a gesture towards the vanquished. 1687 01:28:22,047 --> 01:28:24,465 - Gus, it's your honor. - GUS: Okay. 1688 01:28:24,549 --> 01:28:27,051 Reports that some Afghan units have... 1689 01:28:27,135 --> 01:28:31,305 Well, here's to you, you motherfuckers. 1690 01:28:31,390 --> 01:28:32,473 (CHEERING) 1691 01:28:32,557 --> 01:28:37,061 determined to show the world that the era of Soviet military intervention 1692 01:28:37,145 --> 01:28:39,981 in other countries is now over. 1693 01:28:40,399 --> 01:28:42,900 (DISCO MUSIC PLAYING) 1694 01:28:42,985 --> 01:28:46,946 - CHARLIE: Well, I told you. - GUS: Told me what? 1695 01:28:47,072 --> 01:28:50,116 All we had to do was shoot down the helicopters. 1696 01:28:52,911 --> 01:28:55,705 Listen, not for nothing, but do you know the story 1697 01:28:55,789 --> 01:28:57,415 about the Zen master and the little boy? 1698 01:28:57,499 --> 01:28:59,083 Oh, is this something from Nitsa, 1699 01:28:59,167 --> 01:29:01,961 the Greek witch of Aquilippa, Pennsylvania? 1700 01:29:02,087 --> 01:29:04,463 Yeah, as a matter of fact, it is. 1701 01:29:04,589 --> 01:29:06,215 (PEOPLE LAUGHING) 1702 01:29:06,299 --> 01:29:09,593 There was a little boy, and on his 14th birthday he gets a horse. 1703 01:29:09,678 --> 01:29:12,638 And everybody in the village says, "How wonderful! The boy got a horse." 1704 01:29:12,764 --> 01:29:15,307 And the Zen master says, "We'll see." 1705 01:29:15,767 --> 01:29:17,996 Two years later, the boy falls off the horse, breaks his leg. 1706 01:29:18,020 --> 01:29:20,062 And everybody in the village says, "How terrible!" 1707 01:29:20,147 --> 01:29:22,773 And the Zen master says, "We'll see." 1708 01:29:23,108 --> 01:29:24,400 Then a war breaks out, 1709 01:29:24,484 --> 01:29:26,004 and all the young men have to go off and fight, 1710 01:29:26,028 --> 01:29:27,839 except the boy can't 'cause his leg's all messed up. 1711 01:29:27,863 --> 01:29:29,590 And everybody in the village says, "How wonderful!" 1712 01:29:29,614 --> 01:29:32,158 And the Zen master says, "We'll see." 1713 01:29:33,326 --> 01:29:37,163 - So you get it. - No. No, I don't 'cause I'm stupid. 1714 01:29:37,539 --> 01:29:40,041 You're not stupid. You're just in Congress. 1715 01:29:40,125 --> 01:29:41,936 - Send them money. - You can start with the roads. 1716 01:29:41,960 --> 01:29:44,188 - Move on to the schools, factories. - Gus, now, it's a party. 1717 01:29:44,212 --> 01:29:45,588 - Restock the sheep herds. - Hey. 1718 01:29:45,672 --> 01:29:47,483 - Give them jobs, give them hope. - I'm trying. I'm trying. 1719 01:29:47,507 --> 01:29:49,485 - Yeah, well, try harder. - I'm fighting for every dollar. 1720 01:29:49,509 --> 01:29:53,137 - Yeah, yeah. - I took you from 5 million to a billion. 1721 01:29:53,638 --> 01:29:55,158 I broke the ice on the Stinger and the Milan. 1722 01:29:55,182 --> 01:29:58,184 I got a Democratic Congress in lockstep behind a Republican President. 1723 01:29:58,310 --> 01:29:59,435 Well, that's not good enough 1724 01:29:59,519 --> 01:30:01,956 'cause I'm gonna hand you a code word classified NIE right now, 1725 01:30:01,980 --> 01:30:03,833 and it's gonna tell you that the crazies have started rolling 1726 01:30:03,857 --> 01:30:06,984 into Kandahar like it's a fucking bathtub drain. 1727 01:30:08,028 --> 01:30:10,654 Jesus, Gus, you could depress a bride on her wedding day. 1728 01:30:10,739 --> 01:30:11,822 Hey. 1729 01:30:15,327 --> 01:30:17,578 Listen to what I'm telling you. 1730 01:30:35,097 --> 01:30:38,682 You did a hell of a job for the son of a soda pop maker. 1731 01:30:39,226 --> 01:30:42,895 "We'll see," said the Zen master. 1732 01:30:58,245 --> 01:31:00,371 $1 million for school reconstruction? 1733 01:31:00,497 --> 01:31:01,705 MAN 1: Oh, shit, Charlie. 1734 01:31:01,832 --> 01:31:04,500 - Listen. - He's like the congressman from Kabul. 1735 01:31:04,584 --> 01:31:08,337 Did you hear me say it was a million, not a billion, for school construction? 1736 01:31:08,421 --> 01:31:10,339 Yeah, we heard you. Everybody heard you, buddy. 1737 01:31:10,423 --> 01:31:12,049 They heard you in Dover, Delaware. 1738 01:31:12,175 --> 01:31:13,694 Well, I sure hope I'm not annoying you, Bob, 1739 01:31:13,718 --> 01:31:15,571 - 'cause that's the last thing I want to do. - Look... 1740 01:31:15,595 --> 01:31:18,556 I was in the Roosevelt Room with the President last week. 1741 01:31:18,682 --> 01:31:19,723 You know what he said? 1742 01:31:19,850 --> 01:31:22,017 He said, "Afghanistan? Is that still going on?" 1743 01:31:22,102 --> 01:31:23,519 Well, it is. 1744 01:31:23,687 --> 01:31:25,104 Half the population of that country 1745 01:31:25,230 --> 01:31:26,582 - is under the age of 14. - Charlie. 1746 01:31:26,606 --> 01:31:30,234 Half the population is under the age of 14. 1747 01:31:31,069 --> 01:31:32,588 Now, think how fucking dangerous that is. 1748 01:31:32,612 --> 01:31:35,364 They're gonna come home and find their families are dead, 1749 01:31:35,448 --> 01:31:36,949 their villages have been napalmed. 1750 01:31:37,075 --> 01:31:39,887 - And we helped kill the guys who did it. - Yeah, but they don't know that, Bob, 1751 01:31:39,911 --> 01:31:41,889 'cause they don't get home delivery of The New York Times. 1752 01:31:41,913 --> 01:31:45,082 And even if they did, it was covert, remember? 1753 01:31:45,876 --> 01:31:49,628 This is what we always do. We always go in with our ideals 1754 01:31:49,754 --> 01:31:52,590 and we change the world and then we leave. 1755 01:31:52,924 --> 01:31:54,550 We always leave. 1756 01:31:54,926 --> 01:31:57,720 But that ball, though, it keeps on bouncing. 1757 01:31:57,804 --> 01:32:00,222 - What? - The ball keeps on bouncing. 1758 01:32:00,432 --> 01:32:01,784 MAN 2: Yeah, we're a little busy right now 1759 01:32:01,808 --> 01:32:03,726 reorganizing Eastern Europe, don't you think? 1760 01:32:03,810 --> 01:32:05,603 We've spent billions. 1761 01:32:05,729 --> 01:32:09,398 Let's spend a million on H.R. 118 and rebuild a school. 1762 01:32:09,482 --> 01:32:13,068 Charlie, nobody gives a shit about a school in Pakistan. 1763 01:32:13,612 --> 01:32:15,070 Afghanistan. 1764 01:32:36,468 --> 01:32:41,513 MAN: So, for the first time, a civilian is being given our highest recognition, 1765 01:32:42,098 --> 01:32:44,141 that of Honored Colleague. 1766 01:32:44,309 --> 01:32:46,936 Ladies and gentlemen of the Clandestine Services, 1767 01:32:47,020 --> 01:32:49,146 Congressman Charles Wilson. 1768 01:32:53,109 --> 01:32:54,610 MAN: Bravo, Charlie. 1769 01:32:55,445 --> 01:32:57,655 (AUDIENCE APPLAUDING) 1770 01:33:03,703 --> 01:33:05,371 (AUDIENCE CHEERING)