1
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I'M DRUNK AS HELL I'LL BLOW YOUR ASS AWAY

2
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LIKE A RICKETY BELL FOOT TO THE FLOOR

3
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AND THE WHISKEY IS FLOWING I GOT A FORTUNE

4
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I GOTTA GET IT GOING YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND

5
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HE DON'T GIVE A DAMN 12 OUNCE MOUSE, 12 OUNCE MOUSE

6
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12 OUNCE MOUSE, 12 OUNCE MOUSE JET CAR'S ROLLIN' ALL NIGHT LONG

7
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CRANKING UP THE JAMS AND SINGING ALONG

8
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CAR FULL OF RICHES AND A BRAND-NEW PHONE ♪

9
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[CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP]

10
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>> SO, WHAT'S IT LIKE TO BE AN EYE?

11
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>> IT'S, LIKE, WOW.

12
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>> OH, YEAH?

13
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REALLY?

14
00:00:51,000 --> 00:01:01,000
>> REAL...ESTATE.

15
00:01:01,000 --> 00:01:08,000
>> REAL...ESTATE.

16
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>> SO HOW DO YOU KNOW SHARK?

17
00:01:11,000 --> 00:01:14,000
>> SHARK KNOW I.

18
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>> SO WHAT, THEN YOU HIRED ME THROUGH HIM?

19
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>> AYE.

20
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>> MMM. GOOD NEWS FOR MOUSE.

21
00:01:22,000 --> 00:01:23,000
HE'S HIRED.

22
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WHAT'S THE JOB?

23
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>> GOLDEN JOE.

24
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>> GOLDEN?

25
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NO WAY.

26
00:01:28,000 --> 00:01:29,000
>> WAY.

27
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CURDS AND WHEY.

28
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>> WHO IS IT?

29
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>> MAGIC MAN.

30
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DOES BUSINESS ON FRICK.

31
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>> OWES YOU MONEY?

32
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>> LOTS. UP TO HIS EYES.

33
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>> HOW MUCH DOES IT COST?

34
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>> 50 MIL.

35
00:01:46,000 --> 00:01:50,000
HOW MUCH DO YOU CHARGE?

36
00:01:50,000 --> 00:01:51,000
>> 50 MIL.

37
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>> UP FRONT FOR EYE?

38
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>> UP FRONT, UP BACK, UPSIDE.

39
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UPSIDE YOUR HEAD.

40
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[AIR HORN SOUNDS] >> IT PAYS 50 MIL FROM EYE.

41
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>> OH, YEAH.

42
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IT PAYS 50 MIL UP FRONT.

43
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IT PAYS 50 MORE MIL WHEN I DELIVER.

44
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THAT'S 60 MIL.

45
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>> IT DOESN'T, BUT IT WILL.

46
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>> SIT DOWN.

47
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>> NO.

48
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>> STAND UP.

49
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>> NO.

50
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>> DID, UH, YOU MEET THE EYE?

51
00:02:24,000 --> 00:02:24,000
>> NO.

52
00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:28,000
>> DID HE SEE YOU?

53
00:02:28,000 --> 00:02:29,000
GET IT?

54
00:02:29,000 --> 00:02:38,000
>> MM-MM.

55
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[MUFFLED, INDISTINCT] >> GOLDEN JOE IS LIKE MAGICAL.

56
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[MUFFLED, INDISTINCT] >> GOLDEN JOE IS LIKE MAGICAL.

57
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HE'S ALL DISAPPEARY AND SHUT.

58
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YOU WATCH THAT, OK?

59
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>> NO.

60
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>> 'CAUSE I'VE COME TO CARE ABOUT YOU...A LOT.

61
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AND ALSO NOT IN THAT WAY.

62
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YEAH, IN THAT WAY A LITTLE.

63
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HALF AND HALF.

64
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>> I NEED A DRINK.

65
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>> IT DOESN'T MATTER.

66
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YOU'LL BE BACK.

67
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>> OH, WOW.

68
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AND I MEAN WOW OW WOW SHUT.

69
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LIP.

70
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GOLDEN JOE.

71
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GOLDEN JOE.

72
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WHAT THE DEALIO?

73
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>> YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN'?

74
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>> NOPE, I DO NOT.

75
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NO WAY IN HELL DO I DO.

76
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I DON'T KNOW.

77
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HEH HEH HEH.

78
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GOLDEN JOE.

79
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>> SLIDE ME A SPILL THRILL, GIRL.

80
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>> YOU ARE GOLDEN JOE.

81
00:03:52,000 --> 00:04:04,000
GOLDEN FRICKIN' JOE, PEOPLE!

82
00:04:04,000 --> 00:04:06,000
HERE YOU GO, JOE.

83
00:04:06,000 --> 00:04:09,000
>> FLO MO SO HO DO QUIZ NIGHT, SHOW YOU RIGHT.

84
00:04:09,000 --> 00:04:10,000
SHORTY, WAZZUP?

85
00:04:10,000 --> 00:04:12,000
>> YEAH, I'M IN!

86
00:04:12,000 --> 00:04:13,000
I'M IN!

87
00:04:13,000 --> 00:04:14,000
HOW ABOUT YOU?

88
00:04:14,000 --> 00:04:18,000
YOU WANT THE USUAL 12 BEERS AT ONCE?

89
00:04:18,000 --> 00:04:21,000
>> CAN I GET, UM...LET'S MAKE IT 13.

90
00:04:21,000 --> 00:04:23,000
>> SO, YO THE MO.

91
00:04:23,000 --> 00:04:26,000
>> WHAT, IS THAT, LIKE, SHORT FOR MOUSE?

92
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THEN, YEAH.

93
00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:28,000
>> SO TELL ME MAN, MO, WHAT'S UP?

94
00:04:28,000 --> 00:04:30,000
WHAT YOU WANT WITH JOE?

95
00:04:30,000 --> 00:04:31,000
'CAUSE THE JOE GOT TO BLOW IN A FEW SECONDS, MAN.

96
00:04:32,000 --> 00:04:33,000
I GOTTA BOUNCE.

97
00:04:33,000 --> 00:04:35,000
I GOT A FEW SHORTIES AT THE HOUSE, MAN.

98
00:04:35,000 --> 00:04:36,000
WHAT'S UP?

99
00:04:36,000 --> 00:04:40,000
>> PRICE ON YOUR GOLDEN HEAD.

100
00:04:40,000 --> 00:04:42,000
LISTEN UP, GWEET.

101
00:04:42,000 --> 00:04:46,000
GOLDEN JOE, HE OWES THE EYE A LOT OF MO...NEY.

102
00:04:46,000 --> 00:04:47,000
>> SO?

103
00:04:47,000 --> 00:04:51,000
>> SO, HE WANTS ME TO COLLECT HALF RIGHT NOW.

104
00:04:51,000 --> 00:04:54,000
>> WHAT YOU SAYING, MAN?

105
00:04:54,000 --> 00:05:00,000
[SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY] >> DAMN, DAWG!

106
00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:03,000
>> OK, LOOK, HERE'S THE PLAN.

107
00:05:03,000 --> 00:05:09,000
YOU GOT A SPECIAL EFFECTS GUY OUTSIDE, WORKS IN THE MOVIES.

108
00:05:09,000 --> 00:05:12,000
HE WORKED ON "BLACK BEAST."

109
00:05:12,000 --> 00:05:12,000
HE'S THE BEST.

110
00:05:12,000 --> 00:05:14,000
HAVE YOU SEEN THAT?

111
00:05:14,000 --> 00:05:16,000
THERE'S NOT ONE BEAST IN IT, BUT YOU THINK THERE IS, OK?

112
00:05:16,000 --> 00:05:18,000
HE'S THAT GOOD.

113
00:05:18,000 --> 00:05:20,000
HE'S GONNA MAKE A MOLD OF YOUR HEAD.

114
00:05:20,000 --> 00:05:22,000
>> YOU WANT TO DO WHAT WITH MY HEAD, MAN?

115
00:05:22,000 --> 00:05:23,000
>> YOUR GOLDEN JOE HEAD.

116
00:05:23,000 --> 00:05:25,000
>> WHAT THE HELL?

117
00:05:25,000 --> 00:05:26,000
>> SHUT UP.

118
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I'M GONNA TAKE JOE HEAD TO THE SHARK.

119
00:05:28,000 --> 00:05:29,000
YOU GET IT?

120
00:05:29,000 --> 00:05:32,000
SEE, HE'LL THINK YOU'RE DEAD 'CAUSE HE'S DUMB.

121
00:05:32,000 --> 00:05:33,000
>> WHAT YOU TALKING ABOUT DEAD?

122
00:05:33,000 --> 00:05:35,000
>> BUT YOU'RE NOT.

123
00:05:35,000 --> 00:05:36,000
NOT YET.

124
00:05:36,000 --> 00:05:37,000
>> MAN, LET'S ROLL FROM HERE, MAN.

125
00:05:37,000 --> 00:05:41,000
>> MMM. LET'S GO OUT LATER.

126
00:05:41,000 --> 00:05:47,000
I WANT TO DRINK SOME SO I CAN DRIVE.

127
00:05:47,000 --> 00:05:49,000
WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT TANKS?

128
00:05:49,000 --> 00:05:51,000
>> THEY ARE BIG AS HELL.

129
00:05:51,000 --> 00:05:55,000
>> THEY'RE ALSO GOOD FOR BUSTING SQUIRRELS OUT OF JAIL.

130
00:05:56,000 --> 00:06:01,000
BUT FIRST, THIS TANK NEEDS SOME LIQUOR.

131
00:06:01,000 --> 00:06:03,000
>> AH, FITZ, THE USUAL?

132
00:06:03,000 --> 00:06:04,000
>> YUP.

133
00:06:04,000 --> 00:06:09,000
>> THAT'LL BE...

134
00:06:09,000 --> 00:06:14,000
LET'S SEE...

135
00:06:14,000 --> 00:06:15,000
$300?

136
00:06:15,000 --> 00:06:21,000
>> TELL YOU WHAT.

137
00:06:21,000 --> 00:06:27,000
[DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES] [AIR HORN SOUNDS]

138
00:06:28,000 --> 00:06:29,000
>> MAN, WHAT ABOUT GOLDEN JOE?

139
00:06:29,000 --> 00:06:31,000
WHERE HIS DRINK AT?

140
00:06:31,000 --> 00:06:33,000
I KNOW YOU DIDN'T JUST TAKE MY DAMN MONEY UP THERE AND BUY

141
00:06:33,000 --> 00:06:35,000
YOURSELF A DRINK AND LEAVE ME OUT, MAN.

142
00:06:35,000 --> 00:06:37,000
WHAT'S UP?

143
00:06:37,000 --> 00:06:41,000
WHERE'S MY DRINK?

144
00:06:41,000 --> 00:06:42,000
>> EXCUSE ME.

145
00:06:42,000 --> 00:06:44,000
EXCUSE ME, SIR?

146
00:06:44,000 --> 00:06:46,000
YOU CAN'T PARK THAT TANK HERE.

147
00:06:46,000 --> 00:06:47,000
SIR? SIR?

148
00:06:47,000 --> 00:06:48,000
EXCUSE ME.

149
00:06:48,000 --> 00:06:50,000
YOU CAN'T PARK THAT TANK HERE.

150
00:06:50,000 --> 00:06:51,000
SIR?

151
00:06:51,000 --> 00:06:52,000
YOU CAN'T PARK THAT TANK HERE.

152
00:06:52,000 --> 00:06:53,000
EXCUSE ME, SIR?

153
00:06:53,000 --> 00:06:55,000
YOU CAN'T PARK THAT TANK HERE.

154
00:06:55,000 --> 00:06:56,000
EXCUSE ME.

155
00:06:56,000 --> 00:07:01,000
YOU CAN'T PARK THAT TANK HERE.

156
00:07:01,000 --> 00:07:02,000
>> WHAT'D SHE SAY?

157
00:07:02,000 --> 00:07:04,000
>> MAN, THAT WAS CRAZY AS HELL.

158
00:07:04,000 --> 00:07:08,000
>> OFFICER, WE HAVE A PLAN.

159
00:07:08,000 --> 00:07:09,000
>> RIGHT ON.

160
00:07:10,000 --> 00:07:13,000
[COUGHS] AM I IN ON IT?

161
00:07:14,000 --> 00:07:14,000
DUDE.

162
00:07:15,000 --> 00:07:16,000
>> MMM. IN A WAY.

163
00:07:16,000 --> 00:07:20,000
>> UM...WHICH WAY?

164
00:07:20,000 --> 00:07:21,000
DUDE? BRO?

165
00:07:21,000 --> 00:07:22,000
MAN BRO.

166
00:07:22,000 --> 00:07:23,000
>> EVERY WAY.

167
00:07:23,000 --> 00:07:25,000
>> NO WAY.

168
00:07:25,000 --> 00:07:29,000
HA HA HA HA!

169
00:07:30,000 --> 00:07:31,000
>> HA HA HA!

170
00:07:32,000 --> 00:07:34,000
YOU SO STONED, BRO.

171
00:07:34,000 --> 00:07:46,000
[LAUGHTER] >> REALLY?

172
00:07:46,000 --> 00:07:47,000
>> HELLO?

173
00:07:48,000 --> 00:07:48,000
A LITTLE HELP.

174
00:07:48,000 --> 00:07:49,000
>> OH.

175
00:07:49,000 --> 00:07:50,000
>> WHY DON'T YOU HOLD THIS.

176
00:07:50,000 --> 00:07:52,000
>> IS THIS, UH, PART OF THE PLAN?

177
00:07:53,000 --> 00:07:54,000
>> IT CAN BE.

178
00:07:54,000 --> 00:07:57,000
>> 'CAUSE I AM THE LAW.

179
00:07:57,000 --> 00:07:59,000
HA HA HA!

180
00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:00,000
>> WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

181
00:08:00,000 --> 00:08:02,000
SKILLET, WHAT'S WRONG?

182
00:08:02,000 --> 00:08:04,000
[SQUEAKING] >> SKILLET?

183
00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:05,000
SKILLET?

184
00:08:05,000 --> 00:08:07,000
SKILLET?

185
00:08:07,000 --> 00:08:08,000
WHAT'S SHAKIN'?

186
00:08:09,000 --> 00:08:12,000
[SQUEAKING] OH, YOU'RE IN A JAIL.

187
00:08:12,000 --> 00:08:14,000
OH.

188
00:08:14,000 --> 00:08:16,000
YOU'RE IN THIS JAIL.

189
00:08:16,000 --> 00:08:18,000
WELL, NOT FOR LONG.

190
00:08:18,000 --> 00:08:20,000
YOU...TRADE.

191
00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:22,000
>> THANK YOU, DAWG.

192
00:08:22,000 --> 00:08:25,000
>> HEY...

193
00:08:25,000 --> 00:08:26,000
YOU FORGOT YOUR BOMB.

194
00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:27,000
>> YOU CAN KEEP IT.

195
00:08:27,000 --> 00:08:29,000
I MADE IT FOR YOU, MAN.

196
00:08:29,000 --> 00:08:32,000
>> OHHH.

197
00:08:33,000 --> 00:08:37,000
YOU GOT ME.

198
00:08:37,000 --> 00:08:47,000
DUDE.

199
00:08:47,000 --> 00:08:56,000
>> ♪ LOOK AT THE SUN OVER THE MOUNTAIN

200
00:08:56,000 --> 00:09:03,000
IT SETS LIKE DESTINY OVER THE MOUNTAINS

201
00:09:03,000 --> 00:09:12,000
IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL ♪ >> I SAW YOU DRIVING THE TANK.

202
00:09:12,000 --> 00:09:14,000
>> NO. IT WASN'T ME.

203
00:09:14,000 --> 00:09:15,000
I DON'T DRIVE.

204
00:09:15,000 --> 00:09:18,000
>> DID YOU GET MY-ONE-EYE?

205
00:09:18,000 --> 00:09:20,000
>> I DON'T UNDERSTAND ANYTHING YOU'RE SAYING.

206
00:09:20,000 --> 00:09:23,000
>> DID YOU GET MY MONEY?

207
00:09:23,000 --> 00:09:24,000
>> YES.

208
00:09:25,000 --> 00:09:26,000
>> WHERE IS IT?

209
00:09:26,000 --> 00:09:27,000
>> PISSED IT AWAY.

210
00:09:27,000 --> 00:09:29,000
>> OOH.

211
00:09:29,000 --> 00:09:30,000
ON WHAT?

212
00:09:30,000 --> 00:09:35,000
>> SPENT IT ON PISS.

213
00:09:35,000 --> 00:09:36,000
>> ON WHAT?

214
00:09:36,000 --> 00:09:37,000
>> A TANK.

215
00:09:37,000 --> 00:09:39,000
>> WHICH TONK?

216
00:09:39,000 --> 00:09:40,000
>> EVERY TONK.

217
00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:44,000
[SQUEAKING] >> WHAT IN THE PISS IS WRONG

218
00:09:44,000 --> 00:09:46,000
WITH YOUR FRIEND?

219
00:09:46,000 --> 00:09:49,000
>> HIS NAME IS NIGHT MOVES.

220
00:09:49,000 --> 00:09:53,000
HE WAS BORN WITH IT AND HE LOVES TANKS.

221
00:09:53,000 --> 00:09:55,000
>> WHOA.

222
00:09:55,000 --> 00:10:03,000
>> ♪ LOOK WITH ME, EYE AND SEE WHAT YOU CAN SEE

223
00:10:03,000 --> 00:10:14,000
WHEN YOU SEE THE SUN WHEN IT SETS ♪

224
00:10:14,000 --> 00:10:16,000
>> HEY, HOW'D THE JOB GO?

225
00:10:16,000 --> 00:10:17,000
>> YOU KNOW.

226
00:10:17,000 --> 00:10:18,000
>> MM-HMM.

227
00:10:18,000 --> 00:10:22,000
>> STARTED IT AND IT WENT ON, YOU KNOW?

228
00:10:22,000 --> 00:10:22,000
>> MMM.

229
00:10:22,000 --> 00:10:23,000
YOU DIDN'T DO IT, DID YOU?

230
00:10:23,000 --> 00:10:24,000
>> NO, NO. I DID IT.

231
00:10:24,000 --> 00:10:25,000
>> NO, NO, NO, NO.

232
00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:27,000
DON'T LIE.

233
00:10:27,000 --> 00:10:28,000
'CAUSE YOU DIDN'T DO IT.

234
00:10:28,000 --> 00:10:29,000
>> DID.

235
00:10:29,000 --> 00:10:30,000
>> ALL RIGHT, THEN WHAT WAS THE JOB?

236
00:10:30,000 --> 00:10:31,000
>> TO DO THINGS.

237
00:10:31,000 --> 00:10:32,000
>> FOR WHAT?

238
00:10:32,000 --> 00:10:34,000
>> MMM...MONEY.

239
00:10:34,000 --> 00:10:36,000
>> DON'T SAY MONEY.

240
00:10:36,000 --> 00:10:38,000
>> RUBLES.

241
00:10:38,000 --> 00:10:39,000
BARNEY RUBLES.

242
00:10:39,000 --> 00:10:40,000
>> WHERE'S THIS GOING?

243
00:10:40,000 --> 00:10:41,000
>> RIGHT HERE.

244
00:10:41,000 --> 00:10:42,000
>> WHERE?

245
00:10:42,000 --> 00:10:44,000
>> EVERYWHERE.

246
00:10:44,000 --> 00:10:46,000
WHO'S THE GHOST?

247
00:10:46,000 --> 00:10:48,000
>> THAT'S THE NEW GUY.

248
00:10:48,000 --> 00:10:52,000
[CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP]

249
00:10:52,000 --> 00:10:56,000
[CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE

250
00:10:56,000 --> 00:10:59,000
--www.ncicap.org--] >> ♪ 12 OUNCE MOUSE

251
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12 OUNCE MOUSE 12 OUNCE MOUSE, 12 OUNCE MOUSE

252
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12 OUNCE MOUSE, 12 OUNCE MOUSE 12 OUNCE MOUSE, 12 OUNCE MOUSE

253
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12 OUNCE MOUSE, 12 OUNCE MOUSE 12 OUNCE MOUSE, 12 OUNCE MOUSE

254
00:11:18,000 --> 00:11:31,000
12 OUNCE MOUSE, 12 OUNCE MOUSE 12 OUNCE MOUSE ♪