Translated By The Community Of WWW.MY-SUBS.COM
What do you say we kill some evil sons of bitches and raise hell?
- You're offering up your soul? - All you gotta do is bring Sam back.
- How long did they give you? - One year.
- I don't wanna go to hell. - We'll save you.
Ed Zeddmore and Harry Spengler. Hellhoundslair. Com.
- What're you doing? - The hell are you doing?
We belong here. We're professional paranormal investigators.
We're just trying to get a book-and-movie deal, okay?
- Get that damn thing out of my face. Go, go!
Sweet Lord of the Rings. Run!
- I'm not going back in there. - Harry, this is our ticket to the big time.
The fame, money, sex. With girls.
Hello.
- I am Harry Spengler. - And I am Ed Zeddmore.
Now, if you've received this tape, you must be some bigwig network executive.
Well, today is your lucky day, mister.
Because the unsolicited pilot you are about to watch...
...is the bold new future of "reality TV."
Mm. We know you've had it hard during the writers' strike.
Lazy fat cats.
Who needs writers when you got guys like us?
Our team faced horrible horrors to bring you the footage...
...that will change your world forever.
So strap in for the scariest hour in the history of television.
In the history of your life.
Strap in for...
...Ghostfacers.
You know, it can get kind of hard balancing our daytime careers...
...with our nighttime missions.
But Ed and I pretty much call the shots at the Kinko's where we work.
So we can usually pretty much get off by 6.
- Every night. Yeah, 6:00.
It used to be just, you know, you and I taking on the cases.
- Just Harry and me. - Two lone wolves.
And two lone wolves need, uh...
...other wolves.
- Morning, Facers. - Good morning, Ghostfacers.
It's 7 p. m., dude.
It's morning to a Ghostfacer.
- Corbett, what we got, buddy? I'm just putting up some...
This has gotta go here, gotta see the whole field.
Markers, eraser, good job.
I first saw Ed, uh...
...putting up flyers down at the outlet mall in Scogan.
So I read one and I thought to myself:
"Huh. Where do ghosts come from?"
And now, here I am.
Oh, ow! Ed, your sister's abusing staff.
That's adopted sister, thank you very much.
Ed has been obsessed with the supernatural since we were kids...
...you know, and then he meets Harry...
...at computer camp and love at first geek.
Spruce here.
What up, player?
I am fifteen-sixteenths Jew...
...one-sixteenth Cherokee. My grandfather is a mohel.
My great-grandfather was a talus maker.
And my great-great-grandfather was a degenerate gambler...
...and, uh, had a peyote addiction.
Okay, people, let's cut the chatter and get on a mission.
Okay.
Morton House.
One of our big fish.
All right, we all know the legend.
Every four years, supposedly this becomes...
...the most haunted place in America.
The leap-year ghost some call it.
The ghost returns at midnight just as February 29th begins.
- And no one has ever stayed the night. - Yeah, every testimony we dug up...
...every eyewitness has run well before midnight.
- That's all about to change, isn't it, baby? - Absolutely true, Ed.
- Absolutely true. - Mm, that's good.
French vanilla, because the other day you said how much you liked it, so...
Thank you.
You are welcome.
I like Corbett, I do. Um...
Shows up early, does his job.
A lot of good hustle out...
I think he's got the hots for Ed and that could spell trouble for the team.
Ed's kind of the more rugged, with that really golden...
...beautiful sort of beard. Ha, ha.
Uh, and Harry's nice.
Twenty-ninth...
...is this Friday, Facers.
We want this mission, we gotta move on it now, or guess what.
He's gone for another four years.
- What's this? Wait a minute.
Watch out. Oh.
- Oh, Dad, come on! Let's just cut the cameras.
We don't need that. We don't need this part.
Stay low. Follow formation.
Okay, as expected.
A lot of people have tried to break into the Morton House.
The local authorities have just gotten fed up.
Looks like the cops have got this place pretty well fenced off.
Wait. Didn't you guys get, like, a permit or something?
A permit? That's a good idea for next time.
Yeah.
Car, car.
Flashlights off. Corbett!
Okay, okay.
Hey, hey, hey. Shh.
Be totally still.
It's okay. Not cops, just hicks.
Not cops, not cops. Ed.
I got it, I got it, I got it. Ed's got it, Ed's got it.
Guys, let's go, let's go, let's go.
- Go. Let's go.
Go, Spruce.
Still, be quiet.
There's the kitchen sink. Copy that.
All right, everybody. Ghostfacers, let's line up.
Everybody.
We're gonna set up camp right here. This is Command Center 1.
We call this the Eagle's Nest.
Hallway, Cam 1 up and running.
Looking good, Corbett.
Copy that, Ed.
Uh...
Uh, you're welcome. Spruce, how are we doing there, buddy?
Checking basement, Camera 2, mein Führer.
Maggie, I got no visual on you, Maggie.
- Do you copy? There you are.
- Harry, you alive? Upstairs den, Camera 1.
Good, good. I can smell syndication.
All right, fellas, let's regroup at the Eagle's Nest.
- Hey, Spengler. Right there.
- Battery check. Check.
- Check. Check. Okay.
Look at Corbett.
Yo, Corbett, dude. - Looking good, Corbett.
You're Robocop. - Robocop?
- You think I look like Robocop? Everybody, bring it in.
We've all been here before. Standard walk-through.
- Team one, west. Okay.
- Team two, east. - Got it.
Spin the tires, light the fires. Ghostfacers on three.
One, two, three, Ghostfacers!
Hello?
I'm speaking to the restless spirits of the Morton House.
- Let's go in. Okay.
Hello?
My name's Ed.
Careful.
Watch your back.
Okay. Okay. Look over there.
What's your name?
0.3, 0.29.
Is there an entity or entities here with us now?
- Give us a sign of your presence. - Breathe, buddy.
- I can't breathe. - Corbett, you...
Corbett, night vision.
Okay. Okay, okay, I got it. Okay.
- Okay. - Calm down. Breathe. Okay?
- What? - Calm the whirlwinds of your mind.
We're doing a basic EMF, EVP, temp-flux sweep.
Looks like we got all of our ducks in a row here.
Whoa. - What?
Oh. This camera's fritzing or something.
That's weird.
It's gone.
Get this, get this.
Turn the knob. - All right, that's a good idea.
Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
It's just a rat, dude.
I don't really like rats.
They're gross.
Rats are like the rats of the world.
Was that a...? Was that an apparition? Was that a spectral? A 0.4?
What do we got? Because the EMP was just off the... Oh, God!
Oh, that is so not funny, Spruce!
Oh, God. Okay, it was just... I think it was just this branch.
Okay. In the window.
- This is spooky, man. - It's pretty spooky.
Aah! Freeze! Police officers!
Oh, God.
Take it easy. Let's see identification.
- Come on. Let's see some ID. Why are we...?
- Are we under arrest? We are unarmed.
Oh, God. Oh, God.
You want to explain that weirdo outfit, Mr., uh, Corbett?
- Uh... - Whoa. I know you.
Yeah, sure you do. Give me some identification.
Hold on a second. I know the both of you guys. Yeah.
What? - Yeah.
Holy * * * *.
What?
Uh, west Texas, the tulpa we had to take out.
Those two goofballs that almost got us killed.
Uh, Hellhounds or something?
- * * * * me. - Yeah. We're not Hellhounds anymore.
- Didn't test that well. - What's going on?
They're not cops. No.
Ed, thought you had a partner, didn't you? A different guy?
Yeah. Is he here?
Running around, chasing ghosts. - Okay, listen.
You and Rambo need to get your girlfriends and get out.
Ha-ha-ha. All right.
Listen here, chisel chest, okay?
We were here first.
We've already set up base camp.
We beat you.
- They were here first. Mm-hm. Ha, ha.
Oh, God!
- Ed? - Yeah?
Where's your partner?
Ten-six, ten-seven. Guys, the EMF is really spiking here.
Temperature's down 11 degrees. Keep your eyes peeled.
This could be it.
Maggie, can I get a reading in here, please?
Something keeps messing with the chip.
I don't know what's going on here.
- Guys. Guys. Guys. What is this?
Look, buddy, I'm sorry. That's it. I'm telling you, that's all the money I...
What're you doing at the Morton House? On leap year?
We're here to spend the night, okay? It's for our TV show.
What? Great. Perfect.
- Nobody's spent the night before. - Uh, actually, yeah, they have.
Uh, we've never heard of them.
Yeah, you know why? The ones that have, haven't lived to talk about it.
Oh, come on, I don't believe you.
Look, missing-persons reports going back almost a half century.
Uh, John Graham stayed on a dare: Gone.
Julie Wilkerson: Gone. There are tons more.
All of them came to stay the night, always on a leap year.
The only body they ever found was the last owner, Freeman Daggett.
These look legit. - They are legit.
And we ain't got much time.
Starting at midnight, your friends are going to die.
Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Guys! Guys! Oh, my God!
Oh, my God, we got one!
- Corbett! We saw it. What?
A full apparition! - Get out.
- It was a Class 4, a spectral illumination. It was absolutely amazing.
Hey, aren't those the * * * * * * * * from Texas?
Yes.
Let's have this reunion across the street.
What are you doing here? - Get you ice cream.
- What do you say? Let's go. Guys, I think you should listen...
No, no, no. Look at this. The honest-to-God proof, all right?
Are you kidding me? No, not kidding you.
- We got ghosts. - What reading did we get?
- Uh, it was a 10.9. 10.9?
Yeah, it was 10.9, it was almost 11. And I was like, "What's going on?"
- And I was... Hold on, watch this part.
Oh! He got blasted.
It was crazy. Oh, my God.
What's a death echo?
Look, if we got a problem here, that ghost ain't it.
That's real. Like, that happened. What's a death echo?
Echoes are trapped in a loop, okay?
They keep replaying how they died over and over again...
...usually in the place where they were ganked. As dangerous as a scary movie.
The echo's not dangerous, but something else is.
- You're right. - We need to get out. Come on.
- Let's go. Let's go. Let's go, guys.
Guys, time is running out.
But what about our equipment? What are we gonna...?
We got the material. We got all kinds of stuff.
- We'll make you recurring guest stars. Wait! Wait! Wait!
Where's Corbett?
I wish to communicate with the restless spirits here.
Oh. Lights out. I think I got night-vision here.
That's better.
No man left behind.
That was Corbett. - Come in, Corbett.
Tell Corbett we'll get him. Corbett, don't worry!
Guys.
* * * * you!
Where are you, dude?
- Tell us where you are! Corbett!
Let me go! Aah! Guys!
- Come back, Corbett. - Aah!
Hey, hey, hey! Come on.
Hey, hey, hey!
Hey, Corbett's...
He's not here. Let's go. Let's go back.
No, no, no. That was Corbett. Didn't you hear that?
Sam, get them out of here. Let's go, come on.
- There we go. Keep it moving. Looking good.
Corbett? All right.
Hey. Come on, let's go. Hey.
Watch him. Watch him. - Take a left.
Move, move. Let's go. Turn it off.
Oh, God, what's happened?
Oh, God. He's gone.
He just disappeared.
Let's go through all the angles, all the cameras.
- It's 12:04, Dean. Good? You happy? - Yeah, I am happy.
"Let's go hunt the Morton House. It's our Grand Canyon. "
I don't wanna hear it. You got two months left.
- Instead, we're gonna die tonight. Whoa, whoa!
- What is going on, guys? - I'll tell you what's going on.
Every door, every window, every exit out of this house, they're all sealed.
- Why are they sealed? - It's a supernatural lockdown, okay?
Whatever took Corbett doesn't want us to leave.
And it's no death echo, this is a bad mother. It wants us scared.
Or it just wants us.
Uh, guys, the camera's fritzing again.
Whoa. Guys, the EMF's starting to spike.
- This is a big one. Ed.
Everybody stay close, there's something coming.
Guys.
Uh, whoa. Okay, let's... Let's just stay...
Whoa!
Guys, is this the same echo you guys saw earlier?
- No, it's a different guy. - Multiple echoes? What's going on?
Beats me.
Okay. All right, all right, all right.
Uh, hey, buddy! Hey, hey.
Wake up. You're dead!
- Hello? - What's he doing? What's he doing?
Sometimes you can shock an echo out of its loop...
...if you can talk to the part that's still human.
But usually you have to have some connection to the deceased.
Come on, wake up! Be dead! Huh?
Hey! Hey! - You guys hear that?
- What's that sound? - You guys hear that?
What is that? - Snap out of it, buddy, huh?
What are you waiting for? You're dead.
Oh! Where the hell did it go?
There's no records of this.
No one got shot here, no one got run over by a train. Stay close.
Did the echoes take Corbett?
Yes... No. We don't know what's doing what here...
...that's what we're trying to figure out. Stay close.
Okay, look, um, death echoes are ghosts, okay?
Now, ghosts usually haunt places where they lived or died.
Except these mooks didn't live or die here.
Right. What are they doing here?
Hey, give the lady a cigar.
Does looking at this through that camera...
...make you feel better or something? I mean...
Um... I, uh...
- Oh, yeah. Uh, yeah, I think so. Mm-hm. - Oh.
Freeman Daggett, house's last owner.
Officially commended for 20 years of fine service...
...at the Gamble General Hospital. He's a doctor?
Janitor.
This looks like his den.
- When did you say he died? '64? - Yeah. Heart attack.
What are these, C rations? Army-issued, three squares.
Like, a lifetime supply.
God, is that all he ate?
One-stop shopping.
Hello. Locked.
Come on, guys, this is ridiculous. How is this supposed to find Corbett?
Huh? We should be digging up the frigging floorboards right now.
Huh. Survival Under Atomic Attack.
An optimist.
Crap.
Taxidermy. Okay.
- You said Daggett was a hospital janitor? Yeah.
Ew.
We got three toe tags here.
One, death by gunshots, train accident, and suicide.
Ew.
What?
Well, that explains why all the death echoes are here.
They're here because their bodies are here.
- Somewhere in the house. - What?
Daggett brought the remains home from the morgue to play.
Ew!
That's nasty, dude.
Right.
Wait a minute.
Corbett.
Okay, Maggie.
- Closer to the herd, okay? Maggie?
- Maggie? She's fine.
Harry, I got an 8.6 and climbing fast. Something huge is coming. Look.
Something big is coming.
It's past 11, you guys.
What is happening? Nobody move.
Hold on, hold on. Stay quiet.
- What's going on? Sam? Ed.
Must be the surge.
Sam?
Where'd he go?
Oh, no.
Oh.
Sam!
Sammy! Sam!
Yo! Talk to us! Corbett, Corbett!
- Sammy! Sam?
Corbett, Corbett!
Corbett!
- Corbett! - Sam!
God, I am so scared.
I'm so scared.
It's gonna be okay.
It's gonna be okay, Maggie.
Corbett!
Whoa.
My best friend...
...and my best sister. Ed.
- Harry. - Ed.
- Harry. - Ed. Listen, Ed...
Are you banging my sister?
No.
- Hold my glasses. You got it.
Ed, Ed, Ed!
Guys. Guys. Ed, get off. You guys, stop.
You guys are in trouble. Hey, hey, hey!
The * * * * are you doing?
Cut it out!
We're down by two people.
Sam!
Great.
Sammy!
Sorry.
I'm sorry.
You got my glasses.
- He got my tooth there? Uh, no.
- I won that, right? Yup, you're good.
- Thanks, Spruce. Yeah, it's my fault.
Great. That's nice. Thanks.
Corbett.
Hey. Wake up, man.
Corbett, hey.
- Corbett, hey. Sam?
You gotta keep listening to my voice, okay?
I'm right here.
Stay awake.
Don't listen to him.
It stops hurting, so don't worry.
Corbett, stay with me.
Stay with me, you got it? I'm right here.
Hey. Stay with me. Don't.
Don't. No!
Corbett!
- Corbett! Where'd you go?
Where are you guys?
Dean, what are you doing? Daggett was a Cold-War nut.
He was an amateur taxidermist.
He liked to slow dance with cadavers and all he ate was C rations.
- So what are we looking for? A horrible life.
A lonely life.
A Cold-War life.
He was scared.
- He was scared. He was scared. Scared of what?
What? Where are you going?
Don't leave me in here. Guys. Wait. Dean!
Get away from me.
This won't hurt.
It's okay. It's okay.
Relax.
Where are you going?
Guys like Daggett back then, the ones scared of the Russkies...
...they built bomb shelters.
I'm guessing he's got one.
I'll bet you it's in the basement.
Whoa!
That is not funny. How many times...?
Uh, who closed the door? It did.
It wants to separate us.
Ed, listen to me. There's some salt in my duffle.
Make a circle and get inside.
- Inside his...? - That's stupid.
Inside your duffle bag?
In the salt, you idiot!
- Oh, okay. - Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Hurry up. Get in the circle, get in the circle.
Come on, come on. Quick, quick.
Guys, guys, I don't wanna die, okay? And I don't want you...
- Hey, listen to me, okay? - Don't want you to...
Listen, if we don't die...
...it's totally okay if you, uh, do my sister.
- Ow! Nice.
Guys. Hey, guys.
It's coming again.
Okay. Oh, God. Get in close. - Why does this keep happening?
Why does this keep happening?
Oh, my God.
Oh, God.
Corbett.
Hey, can I ask you something?
- What? - Earlier, you and Sam.
He said you had two months left?
It's complicated.
A while ago, Sam...
No, no, no. I'm not gonna whine about my * * * * * * * * problems...
...to some * * * * * * * * reality show.
I'm gonna do my * * * * * * * job.
Is it cancer? - Shut up.
You hear that?
I've been waiting for some more friends.
I get lonely.
But you're coming to my party, aren't you?
Is that music? It's coming from behind this wall.
Wow, you're strong.
You'll stay a good, long time.
Sam!
Oh, my God.
Oh, no. Corbett.
Oh, God, what have we done?
- Oh, Corbett. - Ed. Ed.
Yeah? - Corbett's... He's a death echo.
He's, uh, reliving his own murder.
Over and over forever.
What's this Daggett guy's problem anyway?
Loneliness.
- Has he never heard of a RealDoll? - No, no.
Daggett was the Norman Bates, stuff-your-mother kind of lonely.
I mean, that's why he lifted these bodies from the morgue.
He threw himself a birthday party, except they were the only ones who would come.
Anyway, so at midnight, he sealed them in the bomb shelter and went upstairs...
...and OD'd on horse tranqs.
How do you know this?
- Because he told me. - Oh.
- Yeah. - Okay, so now that he's dead, what?
Same song, different verse, trying to get people come to his party?
Pretty much, yeah. Stay forever.
Those real bullets?
It's rock salt.
Ghostfacers
We go to places where others will not
Ghostfacers
Stay in the kitchen When the kitchen gets hot
Guys.
Oh, no. Oh, Corbett.
Wait, guys.
Guys, it's... It's Corbett.
He's... He's trapped.
He's in a lot of pain, you know? We gotta... We gotta try and...
We got to try and pull him out of his loop.
We have to.
Ed.
Corbett?
Corbett, it's...
- Oh, God. I gotta do it, Harry. Don't cross the line of salt.
Corbett, listen to me.
Okay, I'm not gonna hurt you.
Listen.
Listen. Oh, God.
Corbett.
- Oh, my God. Get back here. Get back.
I can't, okay?
He's not hearing me, okay? He won't stop dying.
Seriously? You're still shooting?
It makes him feel better. Don't ask.
God.
Oh, hell, guys. Get in your ghost role thing.
Something's coming.
Oh, my God. Aah!
L... I know how we can get through to him.
How?
Ed.
- He had feelings for you. - Huh?
- He wanted you. - Wha...?
- Wanted me to what? - You know.
No.
And you know what you've gotta do.
You can do it, Ed.
You've always been the brave one. Yes, you can. You make us brave.
- Maggie, right? Yeah. Yeah, you do.
You totally do.
Ed...
...you gotta go be gay for that poor, dead intern.
You gotta send him into the light.
Corbett.
Maggie. No, no, Maggie. No, it's okay. Don't worry.
Corbett, look.
Hey, it's just Ed, buddy.
It's just me.
Hey. Hey, Corbett, listen to me.
Listen to me. I'm... We...
Okay.
You meant...
Corbett, you meant a lot to the team.
You meant...
You meant a lot to me.
You know, never ever back down...
...never say a bad word, okay? I remember that, Corbett. L...
I remember that. I remember because I love you, Corbett.
I really, truly love you.
Do you remember that?
Do you?
- Hey. Ed? Yeah.
Yeah, Corbett, it's...
Corbett, yeah, it's me.
It's me. Look at me.
You gotta help us, man.
You have to help us, Corbett. Please. Please.
Please help us right now.
Take it easy. You all right?
Uh, guys.
Hey! Come here!
This is bad. Very bad.
Corbett?
You all right, dude? - Oh. Unh.
You all right? - Oh.
Oh, my God.
Leap year, February 29th, the Morton House.
A tragic day.
A day of souls bound in torment...
...of lives held in cruel balance.
But the Ghostfacers, they did the best that they could.
We lost a beloved friend...
...but we gained new allies.
We know this much:
That every day, including today, is a new beginning.
We learned more than we can say in the brutal feat of the Morton House.
The Ghostfacers were forced to face something far more scary than ghosts.
They were forced to face themselves.
War changes man.
And Maggie.
War changes man...
...and one woman.
You know, Corbett, we just...
Oh, gosh, we just like to think that you're out there watching over us.
As far as we're concerned, you're not an intern anymore.
You have more than earned full Ghostfacer status.
Plus it'd cool to have a ghost on the team.
Yeah.
And here we were thinking that, you know, we were teaching you...
...and all this time, you were teaching us...
...about heart...
...about dedication.
About...
...how gay love can pierce through the veil of death and save the day.
Thank you, Alan J. Corbett.
Go well into that starry night, young Turk.
Go well.
Come on, Spruce, I gotta get all this stuff packed up.
So? Pack and talk.
I don't know what to say.
Say what comes to mind.
This is one of our confessional moments, Corbett, so confess.
What'd you think was gonna happen tonight?
What do you think's gonna happen tonight on this trip?
I think tonight...
I really do.
- I think all our dreams are gonna come true.
Does that sound stupid?
Kind of does, yeah. - Ha, ha.
So guys, what do you think?
You all right?
You know, I kind of think it was half awesome.
Half awesome. That's full-on good, right?
Yeah. I mean, it's bizarre how y'all are able to, uh...
...honor Corbett's memory while grossly exploiting the manner of his death.
Yeah. No, it's a real tight rope you guys are walking.
Yeah. All right, guys.
No, that's reality, man.
Yeah. Corbett gave his life searching for the truth...
...and it is our job over here to share it with the world.
Right. Well, um, our experience:
Know what you get when you show the truth?
A straitjacket or a punch in the face.
- Sometimes both. - Right.
Come on, guys, don't be Facer haters because...
...we happened to have gotten the footage of the century.
Oh, yeah.
- You got us there. - Yeah.
Yeah. Well, we'll see you guys around.
- Yeah. - Peace out.
- Dicks. - Oh, yeah.
Totally. - Yep. Let's start laying off some DVDs.
That sounds like a good idea, Spruce.
I think we're gonna need a bigger office here.
Because we're gonna go national, then it's gonna go international, and...
- Menudo left their dance bag behind. - Ha-ha-ha.
What's inside?
Huh?
Whoa. What the hell is this?
Uh, seem to be having some technical difficulty over here.
- Wait, wait, wait. No, no, no.
Wait! " No operating system found"? Wait a minute.
- We clean? No!
Are you kidding me? No. This can't be happening.
Harry. Harry. No!
Electromagnet. Wiped out every tape and hard drive.
World just isn't ready for the Ghostfacers.
That's too bad, I kind of liked the show.
Had its moments.
That is money in the bank.
Subtitles by SDI Media Group