1 00:00:02,226 --> 00:00:03,666 Can I get you guys anything to drink? 2 00:00:03,900 --> 00:00:04,882 BOTH: Scotch, neat. 3 00:00:04,884 --> 00:00:05,532 Jinx. 4 00:00:05,534 --> 00:00:06,667 (gasps) 5 00:00:08,804 --> 00:00:11,472 Oh, my... 6 00:00:11,474 --> 00:00:13,724 God. 7 00:00:13,826 --> 00:00:16,544 NARRATOR: Kids, you may be wondering why five adults 8 00:00:16,546 --> 00:00:19,680 in their 30s would take a jinx so seriously. 9 00:00:19,682 --> 00:00:22,316 It all started one day five years ago. 10 00:00:22,318 --> 00:00:23,834 Ooh, Van Helsing. Ooh, Van Helsing. 11 00:00:23,836 --> 00:00:26,053 Jinx. You're jinxed. 12 00:00:26,055 --> 00:00:27,788 That means that you can't speak until someone 13 00:00:27,790 --> 00:00:29,656 who was present for the jinx says your name, 14 00:00:29,658 --> 00:00:30,491 or else 15 00:00:30,493 --> 00:00:32,493 you will have very bad luck. 16 00:00:32,495 --> 00:00:33,794 (scoffs) That's ridiculous. 17 00:00:33,796 --> 00:00:34,962 (both gasp) 18 00:00:34,964 --> 00:00:36,347 You broke the jinx. 19 00:00:36,349 --> 00:00:38,215 Marshall, I'm a grown-ass man. 20 00:00:38,217 --> 00:00:40,217 I'm on my building's co-op board. 21 00:00:40,219 --> 00:00:43,137 When I say a Pinot Noir tastes luxuriously earthy 22 00:00:43,139 --> 00:00:45,556 with a hint of rhubarb, I'm not faking it. 23 00:00:45,558 --> 00:00:46,691 I've had several 24 00:00:46,693 --> 00:00:49,026 of the same sexual partners as Henry Kissinger. 25 00:00:49,028 --> 00:00:52,146 I'm not about to stop talking just because I was jinxed. 26 00:00:54,333 --> 00:00:55,533 NARRATOR: Barney broke three limbs 27 00:00:55,535 --> 00:00:56,701 and two vertebrae, 28 00:00:56,703 --> 00:00:58,386 but he never broke another jinx. 29 00:00:58,388 --> 00:01:01,655 In fact, he started taking jinxes way too seriously. 30 00:01:01,657 --> 00:01:04,191 Barney, I'm on hold with Sports Talk AM 31 00:01:04,193 --> 00:01:06,527 to talk to my childhood hero from the Minnesota Twins. 32 00:01:06,529 --> 00:01:07,545 Who's your childhood hero? 33 00:01:07,547 --> 00:01:09,196 Frank Viola. Frank Viola-- jinx! 34 00:01:09,198 --> 00:01:11,215 (over phone): Hello, this is Frank. 35 00:01:11,217 --> 00:01:12,299 Anyone there? 36 00:01:12,301 --> 00:01:13,367 Hello? 37 00:01:13,369 --> 00:01:16,587 I can hear you breathing, you coward. 38 00:01:17,756 --> 00:01:19,757 NARRATOR: So, when someone finally jinxed Barney 39 00:01:19,759 --> 00:01:21,125 for the first time in years, 40 00:01:21,127 --> 00:01:22,876 we were pretty psyched. 41 00:01:22,878 --> 00:01:24,562 The reign of terror is over! 42 00:01:24,564 --> 00:01:26,931 I've had this cigar in my pocket for two years, 43 00:01:26,933 --> 00:01:29,517 waiting for this moment. 44 00:01:29,519 --> 00:01:32,987 Aw, that would've been good about two years ago. 45 00:01:32,989 --> 00:01:35,055 Cheers. 46 00:01:35,057 --> 00:01:35,990 (all whooping) 47 00:01:35,992 --> 00:01:37,575 Huzzah! Huzzah. 48 00:01:37,577 --> 00:01:40,745 LILY: Oh, oh, oh, you want us to say your name 49 00:01:40,747 --> 00:01:42,396 and un-jinx you? 50 00:01:42,398 --> 00:01:43,664 I don't think so, pal. 51 00:01:43,666 --> 00:01:46,117 This is gonna be a long jinx. 52 00:01:46,119 --> 00:01:48,169 Like Yom Kippur services long. 53 00:01:48,171 --> 00:01:50,755 The only difference is, Yom Kippur's a fast 54 00:01:50,757 --> 00:01:53,040 and this one's gonna be a slow. 55 00:01:53,042 --> 00:01:54,792 Oh! ROBIN: Now, Ted, 56 00:01:54,794 --> 00:01:57,911 I was wondering if you could expand upon what you were saying 57 00:01:57,913 --> 00:02:00,247 earlier about antiquated currency. 58 00:02:00,249 --> 00:02:01,515 Ah, yes, yes. 59 00:02:01,517 --> 00:02:03,384 Contrary to popular belief, 60 00:02:03,386 --> 00:02:06,687 the buffalo nickel was modeled on the Black Diamond bison 61 00:02:06,689 --> 00:02:10,357 rather than the more iconic Western Plains bison. 62 00:02:10,359 --> 00:02:11,692 To wit, 63 00:02:11,694 --> 00:02:13,260 if President Taft had had his way, 64 00:02:13,262 --> 00:02:15,681 we'd all be talking about the egret nickel. 65 00:02:15,682 --> 00:02:19,682 ♪ How I Met Your Mother 8x11 ♪ The Final Page, Part One Original Air Date on December 17, 2012 66 00:02:19,683 --> 00:02:23,683 == sync, corrected by elderman == 67 00:02:31,074 --> 00:02:33,759 NARRATOR: In the winter of 2012 the skyscraper 68 00:02:33,761 --> 00:02:35,878 that I designed was about to open, 69 00:02:35,880 --> 00:02:38,130 which got me thinking about the most influential 70 00:02:38,132 --> 00:02:40,349 architecture professor I ever had. 71 00:02:40,351 --> 00:02:44,019 So when the children of our grandchildren's children 72 00:02:44,021 --> 00:02:47,356 ask us "Who were we," they'll find the answer carved 73 00:02:47,358 --> 00:02:51,977 into the granite poetry of our architecture. 74 00:02:51,979 --> 00:02:53,896 Okay. 75 00:02:53,898 --> 00:02:56,282 It doesn't get any better than that. 76 00:02:56,284 --> 00:02:58,934 Class dismissed. 77 00:03:01,571 --> 00:03:05,374 Wow, just wow. 78 00:03:05,376 --> 00:03:06,575 Do you need something? 79 00:03:06,577 --> 00:03:08,827 I have an apple I was hoping to eat in silence. 80 00:03:08,829 --> 00:03:11,780 Of course, Professor Vinick, I, um, 81 00:03:11,782 --> 00:03:13,615 I-I sketched out a design, 82 00:03:13,617 --> 00:03:15,751 and it'd be such an honor if you took a look at it. 83 00:03:15,753 --> 00:03:18,053 Oh, well. 84 00:03:18,055 --> 00:03:19,221 It is believed 85 00:03:19,223 --> 00:03:24,226 that it took the pharaohs over 100 years 86 00:03:24,228 --> 00:03:26,011 to build the Sphinx. 87 00:03:26,863 --> 00:03:29,164 So... 88 00:03:29,166 --> 00:03:30,465 you think... 89 00:03:30,467 --> 00:03:32,434 I should spend more time on it? 90 00:03:32,436 --> 00:03:33,852 Oh, dear God, no. 91 00:03:33,854 --> 00:03:35,070 This is terrible. 92 00:03:35,072 --> 00:03:37,439 Then, why'd you mention the Sphinx? 93 00:03:37,441 --> 00:03:39,191 (laughs) 94 00:03:39,193 --> 00:03:42,778 I find my mind is often with the Sphinx. 95 00:03:42,780 --> 00:03:45,531 Anyway, you'll never be an architect. 96 00:03:45,533 --> 00:03:47,149 You'll never be an architect. 97 00:03:47,151 --> 00:03:48,483 You'll never be an architect. 98 00:03:48,485 --> 00:03:50,986 (laughing): You'll never be an architect! 99 00:03:50,988 --> 00:03:51,887 Well, guess what. 100 00:03:51,889 --> 00:03:53,372 I sent Professor Vinick 101 00:03:53,374 --> 00:03:55,157 the invitation to the opening of my building, 102 00:03:55,159 --> 00:03:57,126 so he'll see that I did become an architect, 103 00:03:57,128 --> 00:03:59,294 and that I've moved past his petty, hurtful words. 104 00:03:59,296 --> 00:04:01,130 ROBIN: Wow. 105 00:04:01,132 --> 00:04:02,497 15 years later and you're still this obsessed. 106 00:04:02,499 --> 00:04:04,266 Yeah, if Vinick ever goes missing, 107 00:04:04,268 --> 00:04:06,635 the cops are gonna come looking for him in your basement. 108 00:04:06,637 --> 00:04:09,388 Totally, he's Ted's pit guy. 109 00:04:09,390 --> 00:04:11,106 How dare you? 110 00:04:11,108 --> 00:04:12,141 And what is that? 111 00:04:12,143 --> 00:04:13,809 A pit guy is someone 112 00:04:13,811 --> 00:04:16,028 you've been obsessed with for so long... 113 00:04:16,030 --> 00:04:17,679 that it's driven you crazy enough 114 00:04:17,681 --> 00:04:19,681 to throw them in a pit in your basement 115 00:04:19,683 --> 00:04:21,617 like in The Silence of the Lambs. 116 00:04:21,619 --> 00:04:25,120 (screaming) 117 00:04:25,122 --> 00:04:27,039 (laughing) 118 00:04:27,041 --> 00:04:29,491 I'm not gonna Silence of the Lambs him. 119 00:04:29,493 --> 00:04:30,709 At most, 120 00:04:30,711 --> 00:04:32,661 I'd Revenge of the Nerds him. 121 00:04:32,663 --> 00:04:34,529 Though I don't see a scenario where he agrees 122 00:04:34,531 --> 00:04:35,964 to play me in a pentathlon. 123 00:04:35,966 --> 00:04:38,867 Yeah, I'm with Ted-- there is no one I hate enough 124 00:04:38,869 --> 00:04:40,502 to throw into a pit. 125 00:04:41,037 --> 00:04:42,871 What? 126 00:04:42,873 --> 00:04:45,424 NARRATOR: When Robin's most hated coworker Patrice 127 00:04:45,426 --> 00:04:46,592 started dating Barney, 128 00:04:46,594 --> 00:04:48,477 she became obsessed. 129 00:04:48,479 --> 00:04:51,013 Patrice, Patrice goes in your pit. 130 00:04:51,015 --> 00:04:54,650 Guys, I told you, I am done obsessing about Patrice. 131 00:04:54,652 --> 00:04:55,884 Just drop her. 132 00:04:55,886 --> 00:04:56,935 Drop her in a pit. 133 00:04:56,937 --> 00:04:58,187 Enough. 134 00:04:58,189 --> 00:05:00,555 We all have people that we would throw in our pits, 135 00:05:00,557 --> 00:05:02,724 and I'm sure we all have people 136 00:05:02,726 --> 00:05:05,527 who would like to throw us in their pits. 137 00:05:05,529 --> 00:05:07,413 Yeah, if Marshall or I ever go missing, 138 00:05:07,415 --> 00:05:09,531 I'll tell you whose basement to look in. 139 00:05:09,533 --> 00:05:11,250 Daryl LaCourte. 140 00:05:11,252 --> 00:05:12,334 Oh, no. 141 00:05:12,336 --> 00:05:13,585 It's creepy Daryl. 142 00:05:13,587 --> 00:05:14,503 Let's get out of here before he sees us. 143 00:05:14,505 --> 00:05:16,955 Hey, hot sack coming through. 144 00:05:16,957 --> 00:05:18,740 Ha... ha... 145 00:05:18,742 --> 00:05:20,592 Hi, Daryl. Hey, Daryl. Hey! 146 00:05:20,594 --> 00:05:22,878 I feel like I never see you guys anymore. 147 00:05:22,880 --> 00:05:25,264 Like whenever I'm getting to a party, you're just leaving. 148 00:05:25,266 --> 00:05:26,298 Even that party 149 00:05:26,300 --> 00:05:28,016 at your place-- you guys just raced off 150 00:05:28,018 --> 00:05:29,518 into the night at 7:30. 151 00:05:29,520 --> 00:05:30,519 That's weird. 152 00:05:30,521 --> 00:05:31,419 But this is 153 00:05:31,421 --> 00:05:33,255 great-- the three hackmigos 154 00:05:33,257 --> 00:05:34,973 back together again. 155 00:05:36,309 --> 00:05:39,427 We played Hacky Sack together once freshman year, Daryl. 156 00:05:39,429 --> 00:05:40,929 Once. 157 00:05:40,931 --> 00:05:42,698 November 14, 1996. 158 00:05:42,700 --> 00:05:43,765 That is the best memory ever. 159 00:05:43,767 --> 00:05:44,783 Sure. 160 00:05:44,785 --> 00:05:46,435 (grunts) 161 00:05:46,437 --> 00:05:49,071 The three hackmigos for life. 162 00:05:49,073 --> 00:05:51,123 To this day, we are still getting e-mails 163 00:05:51,125 --> 00:05:52,991 and posts from Daryl. 164 00:05:52,993 --> 00:05:55,277 He has commented on every photo 165 00:05:55,279 --> 00:05:57,663 of Baby Marvin we have ever posted, 166 00:05:57,665 --> 00:05:58,714 and then 167 00:05:58,716 --> 00:06:02,367 he comments on his own comments. 168 00:06:02,369 --> 00:06:03,385 (door opens) 169 00:06:03,387 --> 00:06:05,838 (all clamoring excitedly) 170 00:06:05,840 --> 00:06:08,207 Hey, guys, look, it's Bar... 171 00:06:08,209 --> 00:06:09,457 none, my favorite 172 00:06:09,459 --> 00:06:10,458 non-speaking 173 00:06:10,460 --> 00:06:12,094 jinxed person in the world. 174 00:06:12,096 --> 00:06:12,945 How was 175 00:06:12,947 --> 00:06:14,596 your day? 176 00:06:36,252 --> 00:06:37,920 Yeah, I didn't get a word of that. 177 00:06:37,922 --> 00:06:39,487 Sorry, buddy. 178 00:06:39,489 --> 00:06:42,758 Ah, Scherbatsky, it's my favorite time of year. 179 00:06:42,760 --> 00:06:44,492 Didn't know you liked Christmas so much. 180 00:06:44,494 --> 00:06:46,161 No, year-end reviews. 181 00:06:46,163 --> 00:06:47,679 We get to fire some people. 182 00:06:47,681 --> 00:06:49,848 Get into the spirit. 183 00:06:49,850 --> 00:06:52,000 Look, Sandy, you might enjoy firing people 184 00:06:52,002 --> 00:06:53,352 for petty personal differences. 185 00:06:53,354 --> 00:06:55,270 I'd hardly call giving me gonorrhea 186 00:06:55,272 --> 00:06:57,105 a petty personal difference. 187 00:06:57,107 --> 00:06:58,440 But I am a professional, 188 00:06:58,442 --> 00:07:00,776 and I would never fire someone for unprofessional reasons. 189 00:07:00,778 --> 00:07:02,561 Well, somebody's got to go. 190 00:07:02,563 --> 00:07:05,230 NARRATOR: Kids, the thing about pit people, 191 00:07:05,232 --> 00:07:07,015 sometimes you don't even know you have one 192 00:07:07,017 --> 00:07:09,568 until you have a chance to push 'em in. 193 00:07:09,570 --> 00:07:11,103 Hi, Robin. 194 00:07:14,040 --> 00:07:16,024 Not happening, bro. 195 00:07:18,211 --> 00:07:20,412 Not happening, bro. 196 00:07:22,048 --> 00:07:24,750 Hand get tired? 197 00:07:24,752 --> 00:07:26,835 Not happening, bro. 198 00:07:26,837 --> 00:07:29,137 I hold in my hand 199 00:07:29,139 --> 00:07:31,539 the RSVP from Professor Vinick. 200 00:07:31,541 --> 00:07:32,641 Uh-huh. 201 00:07:32,643 --> 00:07:34,209 Ah, he's checked 202 00:07:34,211 --> 00:07:35,844 "Will not attend," which is fine, 203 00:07:35,846 --> 00:07:38,564 because all I needed to know was that he knows. 204 00:07:38,566 --> 00:07:42,568 So now I will throw this in the trash and never look at it. 205 00:07:42,570 --> 00:07:44,386 What's this? 206 00:07:44,388 --> 00:07:46,321 "I believe you've sent this to the wrong person. 207 00:07:46,323 --> 00:07:49,241 I have no idea who Ted Mosby is." 208 00:07:49,243 --> 00:07:52,444 Uh-oh. Uh-oh. 209 00:07:53,913 --> 00:07:56,331 Oh, you'll remember who I am, Professor Vinick. 210 00:07:56,333 --> 00:07:59,401 You'll never forget it. 211 00:07:59,403 --> 00:08:01,587 Not happening, bro. 212 00:08:04,643 --> 00:08:06,358 Ted, just because we're coming with you to Wesleyan 213 00:08:06,458 --> 00:08:08,178 does not mean that we condone your behavior. 214 00:08:08,292 --> 00:08:10,009 Just using it as an excuse 215 00:08:10,011 --> 00:08:12,895 to see the old campus... 216 00:08:12,897 --> 00:08:15,231 and maybe watch you have a complete mental breakdown. 217 00:08:15,233 --> 00:08:18,534 What are you even gonna do when you see Professor Vinick? 218 00:08:18,536 --> 00:08:20,936 Oh, I'll tell you what I'm gonna do. 219 00:08:23,690 --> 00:08:26,809 Sweet merciful Franks Gehry and Lloyd Wright, 220 00:08:26,811 --> 00:08:30,062 from what brilliant mind was this work of art sired? 221 00:08:30,064 --> 00:08:31,614 Mosby. 222 00:08:31,616 --> 00:08:34,533 Ted Mosby. 223 00:08:34,535 --> 00:08:37,319 (coughing): Architect. 224 00:08:37,321 --> 00:08:38,370 But that's-that's... 225 00:08:38,372 --> 00:08:40,239 Impossible? 226 00:08:40,241 --> 00:08:42,658 Looks like you were wrong, Vinick. 227 00:08:42,660 --> 00:08:45,494 Dead wrong. 228 00:08:51,618 --> 00:08:53,385 (distorted): No! 229 00:08:54,588 --> 00:08:56,288 (yells) 230 00:08:56,290 --> 00:08:57,389 (laughs) 231 00:08:57,391 --> 00:08:59,175 Be careful, Ted. 232 00:08:59,177 --> 00:09:03,145 Revenge fantasies never work out the way you want. 233 00:09:03,147 --> 00:09:05,564 Especially dance- based revenge. 234 00:09:06,566 --> 00:09:07,633 My prom was rough, guys. 235 00:09:07,635 --> 00:09:08,984 LILY: Ooh! 236 00:09:08,986 --> 00:09:10,069 We're almost there. 237 00:09:10,071 --> 00:09:12,238 Oh, I can't wait to see the old campus. 238 00:09:12,240 --> 00:09:15,107 I'm gonna grab one of those giant dining hall hot dogs. 239 00:09:15,109 --> 00:09:17,142 Oh, I love those huge wieners. 240 00:09:19,312 --> 00:09:21,313 I'm not so sure you heard me. 241 00:09:21,315 --> 00:09:25,201 I said, "I love those huge wieners." 242 00:09:25,203 --> 00:09:26,368 I love them. 243 00:09:26,370 --> 00:09:27,586 In my mouth. 244 00:09:29,456 --> 00:09:33,175 So, let me ask you a few questions, Clarice... Patrice. 245 00:09:33,177 --> 00:09:35,544 How would you rate your performance 246 00:09:35,546 --> 00:09:37,346 in the last six months? 247 00:09:37,348 --> 00:09:39,215 Well, I don't like to talk about myself, 248 00:09:39,217 --> 00:09:41,884 but all my coworkers deserve an A-double-plus, 249 00:09:41,886 --> 00:09:43,302 that's for suresies. 250 00:09:43,304 --> 00:09:44,470 Ooh, 251 00:09:44,472 --> 00:09:46,222 fancy lotion. 252 00:09:46,224 --> 00:09:49,608 It puts the lotion in the basket. 253 00:09:49,610 --> 00:09:52,478 It's just, this is really nice lotion. 254 00:09:52,480 --> 00:09:54,280 And what a pretty basket, Robin. 255 00:09:54,282 --> 00:09:56,899 I know, that's why I bought it, Patrice! 256 00:09:58,535 --> 00:10:00,236 Man, it's like 257 00:10:00,238 --> 00:10:01,871 nothing has changed. Mmm, I know. 258 00:10:01,873 --> 00:10:05,491 The bun, the relish. 259 00:10:09,329 --> 00:10:10,829 That's a knee. 260 00:10:10,831 --> 00:10:12,665 It's a beautifully drawn knee, so? 261 00:10:19,089 --> 00:10:21,039 That's a barn. 262 00:10:21,641 --> 00:10:24,710 Oh, knee barn, right. 263 00:10:24,712 --> 00:10:25,594 That's a great idea, Lily. 264 00:10:25,596 --> 00:10:26,979 On the way home, we should stop 265 00:10:26,981 --> 00:10:28,013 at the knee barn, 266 00:10:28,015 --> 00:10:29,815 pick us up some wholesale knees. Yeah. 267 00:10:30,600 --> 00:10:33,552 MAN: Marshall? Lily! 268 00:10:33,554 --> 00:10:35,938 You... you're here. 269 00:10:35,940 --> 00:10:39,108 Hi, Daryl. (quietly): Hi, Daryl. 270 00:10:39,110 --> 00:10:40,075 Hi. 271 00:10:40,077 --> 00:10:41,527 Wow, 272 00:10:41,529 --> 00:10:42,912 after all these years. 273 00:10:42,914 --> 00:10:45,397 You look just like you do in my paintings. 274 00:10:46,666 --> 00:10:48,867 Come here, guys. (grunts) 275 00:10:50,086 --> 00:10:52,738 There are men and there are gods. 276 00:10:52,740 --> 00:10:55,791 Antoni Gaudí was both. 277 00:10:55,793 --> 00:10:58,544 TED: There are jerk faces and there are buttholes. 278 00:10:58,546 --> 00:11:01,263 Professor Vinick was both. 279 00:11:01,265 --> 00:11:02,881 Good one, Ted. 280 00:11:02,883 --> 00:11:06,418 Come on, Vinick, give me an opening. 281 00:11:06,420 --> 00:11:08,253 Gaudí's architecture gave expression 282 00:11:08,255 --> 00:11:12,358 to the anarchic geometric form of nature. 283 00:11:12,360 --> 00:11:14,960 TED (mocking): "Gaudí's architecture..." 284 00:11:14,962 --> 00:11:17,529 Actually, that's a really good point. 285 00:11:17,531 --> 00:11:20,766 ♪ Wow, Professor Vinick 286 00:11:20,768 --> 00:11:23,702 ♪ Man, you taught me so much 287 00:11:23,704 --> 00:11:26,405 ♪ About architecture and life 288 00:11:26,407 --> 00:11:29,575 ♪ God, your lectures are so cool ♪ 289 00:11:29,577 --> 00:11:34,079 ♪ I'll earn your respect and we'll be best friends. ♪ 290 00:11:34,081 --> 00:11:38,450 Okay, it doesn't get any better than that. 291 00:11:38,452 --> 00:11:41,503 (sniffles) No, it doesn't. 292 00:11:41,505 --> 00:11:44,506 What are you doing here, Daryl? 293 00:11:44,508 --> 00:11:47,226 Well, I live right down the street. 294 00:11:47,228 --> 00:11:49,228 But I work right here. 295 00:11:49,230 --> 00:11:51,730 Whoa. Oh, boy. 296 00:11:53,083 --> 00:11:55,184 MARSHALL: Are those... 297 00:11:55,186 --> 00:11:58,020 (clears throat) ...our, our faces up there, buddy? 298 00:11:58,022 --> 00:11:59,071 Hack, yeah! 299 00:11:59,073 --> 00:12:01,106 It was just as much your idea as mine 300 00:12:01,108 --> 00:12:03,609 to open up a Hacky Sack store here at Wesleyan. 301 00:12:03,611 --> 00:12:05,661 So you never left? 302 00:12:05,663 --> 00:12:07,329 Once. I met a girl on Craigslist, 303 00:12:07,331 --> 00:12:10,032 and I flew to Boston to meet her. 304 00:12:10,034 --> 00:12:12,418 She was a man, 300 pounds, and robbed me. 305 00:12:12,420 --> 00:12:14,687 Still, the best night of my life. 306 00:12:14,689 --> 00:12:16,205 Until now! 307 00:12:16,207 --> 00:12:18,707 The three hackmigos back together again! 308 00:12:18,709 --> 00:12:21,694 You know, I've been waiting forever to give you something. 309 00:12:21,696 --> 00:12:23,178 You're coming with me to my house, 310 00:12:23,180 --> 00:12:25,097 and I'm not taking no for an answer. 311 00:12:26,833 --> 00:12:28,634 BARNEY: Dude, this is your chance. 312 00:12:28,636 --> 00:12:30,886 Set me free, and I will lie you out 313 00:12:30,888 --> 00:12:32,021 of this creepynightmare. 314 00:12:32,023 --> 00:12:33,672 MARSHALL: This is a tough one. 315 00:12:33,674 --> 00:12:35,641 On the one hand, we might die. 316 00:12:35,643 --> 00:12:38,143 On the other, you're jinxed. 317 00:12:38,145 --> 00:12:40,145 BARNEY: Let me free, Marshall. 318 00:12:40,147 --> 00:12:42,314 This guy could be violent. 319 00:12:42,316 --> 00:12:45,484 MARSHALL: Violent... Viola... 320 00:12:45,486 --> 00:12:47,453 Frank Viola. 321 00:12:47,455 --> 00:12:52,157 We would love to come to your house, Daryl! 322 00:12:52,159 --> 00:12:54,243 Yeah! 323 00:12:54,245 --> 00:12:56,228 Okay, um... 324 00:12:56,230 --> 00:12:58,864 how often are you and Barney doing it? 325 00:12:58,866 --> 00:13:01,133 That's a strange question, Robin. 326 00:13:01,135 --> 00:13:03,034 You're right. 327 00:13:03,036 --> 00:13:04,803 Maybe I should leave. 328 00:13:04,805 --> 00:13:06,371 Yeah, maybe you should. 329 00:13:06,373 --> 00:13:07,506 You're fired. 330 00:13:08,725 --> 00:13:12,311 Wow. Just wow. 331 00:13:12,313 --> 00:13:15,481 Ted Mosby. I'm a former student of yours. 332 00:13:15,483 --> 00:13:18,183 You know, I actually became an architect. 333 00:13:18,818 --> 00:13:20,069 Any chance you remember me? 334 00:13:20,071 --> 00:13:22,738 Oh, please excuse me, I've been teaching for over 20 years. 335 00:13:22,740 --> 00:13:25,574 All the faces start to blend together 336 00:13:25,576 --> 00:13:28,727 unless you have a, a weird mustache or, or something. 337 00:13:28,729 --> 00:13:31,363 Junior year I tried to grow muttonchops, 338 00:13:31,365 --> 00:13:34,366 but people kept saying my face made them nauseous. 339 00:13:34,368 --> 00:13:37,002 Well, not people. You. 340 00:13:37,754 --> 00:13:40,205 Anay, I would be honored if you, 341 00:13:40,207 --> 00:13:42,458 if you took a look at my building. 342 00:13:45,428 --> 00:13:46,879 This... 343 00:13:46,881 --> 00:13:49,548 is hideous. 344 00:13:50,517 --> 00:13:51,800 You'll never be an architect. 345 00:13:51,802 --> 00:13:53,435 (echoing): You'll never be an architect. 346 00:13:53,437 --> 00:13:55,888 You'll never be an architect. You'll never be an architect! 347 00:13:55,890 --> 00:13:57,189 You'll never be an architect. 348 00:13:57,191 --> 00:13:59,858 Wait. I was mistaken. 349 00:13:59,860 --> 00:14:02,227 You most definitely will be an architect. 350 00:14:02,229 --> 00:14:03,395 Really? 351 00:14:03,397 --> 00:14:04,763 These are astonishing, 352 00:14:04,765 --> 00:14:07,733 Handlebar Pete. 353 00:14:10,005 --> 00:14:12,674 So, when you said "surprise in your house," 354 00:14:12,676 --> 00:14:16,211 what you really meant was "surprise in the poorly lit 355 00:14:16,213 --> 00:14:18,094 windowless basement of your house." 356 00:14:18,095 --> 00:14:20,763 Oh, you guys are gonna love what I have to show you. 357 00:14:20,765 --> 00:14:24,683 I am so excited, I could just cry and laugh and scream 358 00:14:24,685 --> 00:14:26,058 and just punch the wall 359 00:14:26,083 --> 00:14:28,146 over and over and over and over and over! 360 00:14:29,474 --> 00:14:30,857 Could we just see it, 361 00:14:30,859 --> 00:14:32,091 like, up in the living room 362 00:14:32,093 --> 00:14:36,396 or anywhere less... gimp-storagey? 363 00:14:36,398 --> 00:14:37,614 (laughs) I just realized 364 00:14:37,616 --> 00:14:40,366 I want to take a picture of this. 365 00:14:40,368 --> 00:14:42,819 I want to put your faces on my mantel like a trophy. 366 00:14:42,821 --> 00:14:44,204 Like a trophy! 367 00:14:46,123 --> 00:14:49,959 Aah...! Aah...! 368 00:14:52,021 --> 00:14:56,012 (singsongy): Here I come. 369 00:14:56,014 --> 00:15:00,569 And I've got your surprise right here! 370 00:15:00,669 --> 00:15:02,652 No! We don't want your surprise, Daryl! 371 00:15:03,537 --> 00:15:04,871 We're not your amigos, 372 00:15:04,873 --> 00:15:06,573 we're definitely not your hackmigos. 373 00:15:06,575 --> 00:15:08,308 And before you murder us, 374 00:15:08,310 --> 00:15:10,677 you should know that we have a child! 375 00:15:10,679 --> 00:15:12,845 He probably has eight or nine! 376 00:15:12,847 --> 00:15:15,014 What? Murder? 377 00:15:15,016 --> 00:15:17,967 I wanted to give you a check. 378 00:15:19,019 --> 00:15:21,387 For $100,000... 379 00:15:21,389 --> 00:15:24,524 for coming up with the idea of the Three Hackmigos with me. 380 00:15:25,643 --> 00:15:28,678 I brought you down here to show you all my inventory. 381 00:15:29,480 --> 00:15:32,899 Business has really exploded. 382 00:15:32,901 --> 00:15:34,367 (laughs) 383 00:15:34,369 --> 00:15:36,352 I mean, I'm sort of the Mark Zuckerberg 384 00:15:36,354 --> 00:15:39,372 of jam-band concert parking lot athletics. 385 00:15:39,374 --> 00:15:40,490 Well, second. 386 00:15:40,985 --> 00:15:43,619 But I'm coming for you, Devil Stick Ron. 387 00:15:43,621 --> 00:15:46,672 (screaming) 388 00:15:46,676 --> 00:15:48,277 Why would you fire me? 389 00:15:48,279 --> 00:15:50,696 Because nobody should be as happy as you are. 390 00:15:51,815 --> 00:15:56,569 And also your cookies... they're only pretty good. 391 00:15:56,571 --> 00:15:58,955 (gasps) 392 00:16:01,075 --> 00:16:03,626 Robin, is this really about me? 393 00:16:05,546 --> 00:16:07,797 (voice breaking): No, it's not. 394 00:16:13,036 --> 00:16:17,974 The old "fire and bang." Respect, Scherbatsky. 395 00:16:20,627 --> 00:16:23,711 Hey, Ted, I see you're holding a little version of your building. 396 00:16:24,327 --> 00:16:26,194 So I assume it all worked out? 397 00:16:26,196 --> 00:16:29,063 I realized, since I work in a three-dimensional medium, 398 00:16:29,065 --> 00:16:31,532 the only way to really stick it to Vinick would be 399 00:16:31,534 --> 00:16:33,418 with a three-dimensional model. 400 00:16:33,420 --> 00:16:35,370 Whatever you do, don't march in there 401 00:16:35,372 --> 00:16:37,372 thinking, "I'm gonna do the worm. 402 00:16:37,374 --> 00:16:38,423 That'll show 'em!" 403 00:16:39,208 --> 00:16:40,375 Seriously, guys, 404 00:16:40,377 --> 00:16:42,844 I can't stress enough how bad my prom was. 405 00:16:42,846 --> 00:16:45,046 Speaking of the past... 406 00:16:45,048 --> 00:16:48,349 Wow, we feel like idiots. We're sorry. 407 00:16:48,351 --> 00:16:50,802 You know, honestly, it's fine. 408 00:16:50,804 --> 00:16:52,520 Look how great I'm doing. 409 00:16:52,522 --> 00:16:54,355 Look at what I've built. I don't need 410 00:16:54,357 --> 00:16:55,923 the validation of some people from college 411 00:16:55,925 --> 00:16:57,141 to feel good about myself. 412 00:16:57,143 --> 00:16:59,394 My life is amazing! 413 00:16:59,396 --> 00:17:02,263 I own a timeshare in St. Barts with P-Funk! 414 00:17:02,265 --> 00:17:03,931 The, the whole band? 415 00:17:03,933 --> 00:17:05,433 Yeah. 416 00:17:05,435 --> 00:17:07,602 Do you guys jam? 417 00:17:07,604 --> 00:17:11,105 That's all we do. 418 00:17:11,107 --> 00:17:12,373 (all gasp) 419 00:17:12,375 --> 00:17:13,624 So, you completely rejected 420 00:17:13,626 --> 00:17:14,909 the guy who's been obsessing 421 00:17:14,911 --> 00:17:18,713 about you for 16 years, and he was okay with it? 422 00:17:18,715 --> 00:17:20,114 Whoa. 423 00:17:20,116 --> 00:17:23,784 Is creepy Daryl more emotionally adjusted than I am? 424 00:17:23,786 --> 00:17:25,887 NARRATOR: Kids, sometimes in life 425 00:17:25,889 --> 00:17:28,139 you'll make a pit for someone in your mind. 426 00:17:28,141 --> 00:17:33,478 But ultimately the only person in that pit is yourself. 427 00:17:34,313 --> 00:17:36,797 I'm sorry. 428 00:17:36,799 --> 00:17:39,800 Just seeing you with Barney has brought up 429 00:17:39,802 --> 00:17:41,786 some old feelings, and I... 430 00:17:41,788 --> 00:17:43,855 I really don't like feelings. 431 00:17:43,857 --> 00:17:47,992 But that's not your fault or Barney's fault. 432 00:17:48,977 --> 00:17:51,412 It's just really hard seeing you with him. 433 00:17:51,414 --> 00:17:54,916 ♪ There's been a book on the side of the bed... ♪ 434 00:17:54,918 --> 00:17:57,335 NARRATOR: Which means there's only one person 435 00:17:57,337 --> 00:18:00,455 who can let you out of the pit. 436 00:18:02,758 --> 00:18:07,428 ♪ Many years from now 437 00:18:07,430 --> 00:18:10,548 ♪ I know you'll hear me somehow... ♪ 438 00:18:10,550 --> 00:18:13,834 So you fired Patrice? 439 00:18:13,836 --> 00:18:15,853 No, she's staying. 440 00:18:17,773 --> 00:18:21,509 ♪ The places we will go... 441 00:18:22,194 --> 00:18:25,480 Let's get out of here, guys. 442 00:18:25,482 --> 00:18:27,532 Oh, Mr. Mosby. 443 00:18:27,534 --> 00:18:29,367 You built a model of your building. 444 00:18:29,369 --> 00:18:30,368 No. 445 00:18:30,370 --> 00:18:33,204 Why? To prove some sort of point? 446 00:18:33,206 --> 00:18:34,455 This is just sad. 447 00:18:34,457 --> 00:18:36,157 No, no, I was just throwing it out. 448 00:18:36,159 --> 00:18:38,543 Sure, you were. 449 00:18:38,545 --> 00:18:39,877 No! 450 00:18:39,879 --> 00:18:42,505 No, I-I-I had a transcendent moment 451 00:18:42,506 --> 00:18:45,157 where I found emotional clarity! 452 00:18:45,159 --> 00:18:46,542 And I realize shouting that 453 00:18:46,544 --> 00:18:49,511 makes it seem like it's not true, but I did! 454 00:18:50,797 --> 00:18:52,381 Yeah, we're gonna grab some snacks. 455 00:18:52,383 --> 00:18:54,049 You guys want anything? 456 00:18:55,852 --> 00:18:56,886 Spicy beef jerky. 457 00:18:56,888 --> 00:18:59,004 Got you loud and clear. 458 00:18:59,890 --> 00:19:01,307 (sighs) 459 00:19:05,028 --> 00:19:06,278 Oh, my God! Barney! 460 00:19:06,280 --> 00:19:07,646 You unjinxed me! 461 00:19:07,648 --> 00:19:09,198 I'm free! If the bison 462 00:19:09,200 --> 00:19:11,200 on the nickel could hear you talk about them, 463 00:19:11,202 --> 00:19:13,319 they would diminish their population even further on purpose. 464 00:19:13,321 --> 00:19:15,905 If Lily wants a big wiener in her mouth, she's got my number. 465 00:19:15,907 --> 00:19:18,123 And I'm sorry that you took the rap for all the farting on 466 00:19:18,125 --> 00:19:19,992 the car ride up here. That was me! (sighs) 467 00:19:19,994 --> 00:19:21,994 The ring! What's, what's, what's the ring? 468 00:19:21,996 --> 00:19:24,830 Right, the ring. I'm gonna ask Patrice to marry me. 469 00:19:24,832 --> 00:19:25,881 BOTH: Are you serious? 470 00:19:25,883 --> 00:19:27,750 Jinx! Good! 471 00:19:27,752 --> 00:19:29,802 I need to say some things without you interrupting. 472 00:19:29,804 --> 00:19:33,639 Yes, I am serious. I know that if you could talk, 473 00:19:33,641 --> 00:19:35,007 you'd say that I'm crazy 474 00:19:35,009 --> 00:19:36,558 or that I'm overcorrecting or that I'm moving too fast. 475 00:19:36,560 --> 00:19:37,726 But you would be wrong. 476 00:19:37,728 --> 00:19:40,429 Look, I have banged my way through every bimbo 477 00:19:40,431 --> 00:19:42,398 in the tristate area, and it left me 478 00:19:42,400 --> 00:19:44,516 feeling nothing but, but broken. 479 00:19:44,518 --> 00:19:47,519 But now, with Patrice, 480 00:19:47,521 --> 00:19:51,123 for the first time in my life, I feel settled and happy. 481 00:19:51,125 --> 00:19:53,492 I want to feel this way forever. 482 00:19:53,494 --> 00:19:56,111 So tomorrow night on the roof 483 00:19:56,113 --> 00:19:57,863 of the World Wide News building-- 484 00:19:57,865 --> 00:19:59,164 that's Patrice's favorite spot-- 485 00:19:59,166 --> 00:20:01,033 I'm gonna ask her to marry me. 486 00:20:01,035 --> 00:20:03,268 Ah, poot-tu-tat! You're jinxed. 487 00:20:03,270 --> 00:20:05,421 I'll unjinx you if you'll follow these two rules: 488 00:20:05,423 --> 00:20:07,589 one: you can't try to talk me out of it, 489 00:20:07,591 --> 00:20:12,261 and two: you can't tell anybody. Agreed? 490 00:20:15,765 --> 00:20:17,716 It's a jinx swear, so if you break it, 491 00:20:17,718 --> 00:20:19,918 I get to hit you in the nuts three times 492 00:20:19,920 --> 00:20:21,420 with a Wiffle ball bat. 493 00:20:23,423 --> 00:20:26,225 Thank you... Ted. 494 00:20:28,895 --> 00:20:31,096 Hey... 495 00:20:32,365 --> 00:20:34,149 Hi, guys! 496 00:20:34,151 --> 00:20:35,701 No. But you're jinxed! 497 00:20:35,703 --> 00:20:38,120 I tricked Ted into saying my name. 498 00:20:38,122 --> 00:20:39,705 ALL: Aw, come on, Ted! 499 00:20:39,707 --> 00:20:41,540 Jinx! Jinx! Ha-ha! 500 00:20:41,542 --> 00:20:45,828 The reign of terror is back! (evil laugh) 501 00:20:45,830 --> 00:20:48,380 Hey, if you guys don't want me to smoke 502 00:20:48,382 --> 00:20:50,115 or fart in here, just speak up. 503 00:20:50,117 --> 00:20:51,633 Nothing? Great. 504 00:20:51,635 --> 00:20:54,970 Thanks for the spicy beef jerky, dude. 505 00:20:54,972 --> 00:20:59,091 Anyway, I think we could all use a little quiet. 506 00:20:59,093 --> 00:21:02,794 Unless you have something you want to talk about, Ted? 507 00:21:04,464 --> 00:21:05,764 No. 508 00:21:05,766 --> 00:21:07,433 (engine starts) 509 00:21:09,102 --> 00:21:11,603 Not happening, bro. 510 00:21:12,041 --> 00:21:17,041 == sync, corrected by elderman ==