1 00:00:00,409 --> 00:00:02,272 Kids, in the spring of 2008, 2 00:00:02,372 --> 00:00:05,002 something kinda strange had been happening to your Uncle Barney. 3 00:00:05,411 --> 00:00:06,909 He'd be doing great with a woman... 4 00:00:07,009 --> 00:00:09,426 So I throw the pressurized oxygen tank in his mouth, 5 00:00:09,526 --> 00:00:11,987 I shoot the tank, boom! No more shark. 6 00:00:12,087 --> 00:00:14,374 Mr. Holland and I swim back to shore. 7 00:00:14,857 --> 00:00:16,139 Let me freshen your drink. 8 00:00:16,785 --> 00:00:20,161 He'd only be gone a few moments, but when he returned... 9 00:00:20,261 --> 00:00:21,633 So where were we? 10 00:00:21,903 --> 00:00:22,976 ...he'd get slapped. 11 00:00:23,571 --> 00:00:24,868 It kept happening. 12 00:00:27,996 --> 00:00:30,905 Until finally, Lily was approached by a mysterious woman 13 00:00:31,001 --> 00:00:33,323 who warned her to stay away from Barney. 14 00:00:33,995 --> 00:00:35,878 So when it happened once more... 15 00:00:36,281 --> 00:00:39,449 Again?! Really?! Wait... 16 00:00:39,653 --> 00:00:41,619 ...Barney knew who to look for. 17 00:01:01,691 --> 00:01:02,746 Hey, excuse me. 18 00:01:02,852 --> 00:01:04,786 Did I sleep with you and then totally screw you over? 19 00:01:05,101 --> 00:01:06,268 No. 20 00:01:08,403 --> 00:01:10,108 What are you doing on Friday? 21 00:01:19,134 --> 00:01:19,868 Amy? 22 00:01:20,331 --> 00:01:21,137 Abby. 23 00:01:22,961 --> 00:01:24,828 Right. 24 00:01:26,324 --> 00:01:28,824 Sync by vNaru 25 00:01:40,254 --> 00:01:44,166 Kids, sometimes you can do something right a thousand times in a row... 26 00:01:44,271 --> 00:01:47,417 A rainbow! That's beautiful! 27 00:01:48,603 --> 00:01:51,369 What a beautiful rainbow! 28 00:01:52,211 --> 00:01:56,497 Another rainbow? It's beautiful! 29 00:01:56,723 --> 00:01:59,116 But then, that thousand-and-first time... 30 00:01:59,701 --> 00:02:03,159 You're kidding me. Seriously, aren't you sick of these things? 31 00:02:07,152 --> 00:02:08,686 Hey, how was yo day? 32 00:02:08,791 --> 00:02:11,469 Today, I yelled at a little girl for painting a rainbow. 33 00:02:11,693 --> 00:02:15,127 A rainbow? Sounds like that bitch had it coming. 34 00:02:18,132 --> 00:02:21,609 So, uh, I just met with the contractor. 35 00:02:21,711 --> 00:02:24,079 And it turns out, that fixing the floors of the new apartment 36 00:02:24,183 --> 00:02:26,019 is going to cost a lot more than the estimate. 37 00:02:26,122 --> 00:02:29,029 But we can barely afford that to begin with. 38 00:02:29,233 --> 00:02:30,867 I hate to say this, 39 00:02:31,233 --> 00:02:33,279 but I think you're going to have to sell your stuff. 40 00:02:33,483 --> 00:02:36,737 Whoa! Marshall, that's just a game we play in the bedroom. 41 00:02:37,731 --> 00:02:40,656 I mean your clothes. All those designer pieces and everything. 42 00:02:40,861 --> 00:02:43,159 What? Why just my clothes? 43 00:02:43,263 --> 00:02:45,407 We can sell my stuff, too, but I got to tell you, 44 00:02:45,511 --> 00:02:48,636 I think your Marc Jacobs cocktail dress is going to go for a lot more than my 45 00:02:48,742 --> 00:02:50,787 - "Split Happens" bowling shirt. - Dude. 46 00:02:50,894 --> 00:02:52,436 I'm not selling that. 47 00:02:54,354 --> 00:02:57,369 - I've already made the Website. - You made a Website? 48 00:02:57,473 --> 00:03:02,849 Yeah, it's called "Lily-and-Marshall -sell-their-stuff-dot-com." 49 00:03:03,934 --> 00:03:06,888 No, you know what would be a better name for the site? 50 00:03:06,994 --> 00:03:14,319 Guy-forces-his-wife-to-dress-in-a-garbage -bag-for-the-next-three-years-dot-com. 51 00:03:15,842 --> 00:03:17,198 That's real. 52 00:03:17,733 --> 00:03:21,577 Now I'm worried. That woman is actually wearing a garbage bag. 53 00:03:22,101 --> 00:03:25,577 Hmm, but, girlfriend, you cannot pull off a tall kitchen. 54 00:03:26,632 --> 00:03:28,939 Why are you trying to ruin my life? 55 00:03:29,041 --> 00:03:31,247 Well, you slept with me and then you never called me again. 56 00:03:32,343 --> 00:03:33,839 - And? - That's it. 57 00:03:34,041 --> 00:03:35,059 That's it? 58 00:03:35,634 --> 00:03:37,498 As far as I'm concerned, if I leave you safe on dry land 59 00:03:37,604 --> 00:03:40,178 with adequate transportation home, you've got nothing to complain about. 60 00:03:40,483 --> 00:03:41,918 Well, it hurt, okay? 61 00:03:42,024 --> 00:03:45,247 And then Ted, the love of my life, started dating my boss instead of me. 62 00:03:45,572 --> 00:03:46,938 Do you know how that feels? 63 00:03:47,043 --> 00:03:50,058 Oh, boo-hoo, poor little Ashley. 64 00:03:50,262 --> 00:03:52,187 - Abby! - Abby. 65 00:03:52,594 --> 00:03:55,517 A few weeks ago, Ted dumped me as his wingman. 66 00:03:56,001 --> 00:03:57,769 You had a crush on him for a couple weeks? 67 00:03:57,872 --> 00:04:00,078 I was Ted's best friend for seven years. 68 00:04:00,183 --> 00:04:03,026 - Ted said Marshall was his best friend. - Seven years! 69 00:04:03,964 --> 00:04:04,698 Sorry. 70 00:04:05,364 --> 00:04:07,039 Ted. What an idiot. 71 00:04:07,734 --> 00:04:11,828 With his stupid "meaningful relationship" with Stella. 72 00:04:12,243 --> 00:04:14,078 - Ted. - Ted. 73 00:04:14,354 --> 00:04:16,717 - I hate Ted. - I hate Ted more. 74 00:04:16,822 --> 00:04:20,198 - Are you as turned on as I am? - Probably not quite as much. 75 00:04:22,652 --> 00:04:24,706 I'm sorry I yelled out "Ted." 76 00:04:24,813 --> 00:04:26,896 I'm sorry I yelled out "Abby." 77 00:04:27,672 --> 00:04:29,358 I am Abby. 78 00:04:30,244 --> 00:04:31,228 Oh, cool. 79 00:04:32,552 --> 00:04:33,688 This is insane. 80 00:04:33,893 --> 00:04:35,647 Has Lily even worn half this stuff? 81 00:04:35,852 --> 00:04:38,568 Oh, yeah, like there's nothing in your closet you've never worn? 82 00:04:38,841 --> 00:04:40,756 As a matter of fact, no, there isn't. 83 00:04:40,861 --> 00:04:42,989 Whatever, red cowboy boots. 84 00:04:43,191 --> 00:04:45,869 Those are nice boots. I totally pull those off. 85 00:04:48,024 --> 00:04:50,396 If I were to say "Ted could never pull them off," 86 00:04:50,504 --> 00:04:52,549 - what would I be talking about? - His red cowboy boots. 87 00:04:52,652 --> 00:04:56,166 I totally pull them off! It's a classic Western look. 88 00:04:56,671 --> 00:04:58,889 Oh, okay, uh, today's category: 89 00:04:59,271 --> 00:05:02,509 classic Westerns that involve red cowboy boots. 90 00:05:03,463 --> 00:05:04,246 Robin. 91 00:05:04,451 --> 00:05:06,429 "The Good, the Bad, and the Fabulous." 92 00:05:08,553 --> 00:05:10,056 "The Magnificent Kevin." 93 00:05:11,342 --> 00:05:13,508 "No Country for Straight Men." 94 00:05:15,481 --> 00:05:17,649 I don't want to sell my clothes! 95 00:05:17,854 --> 00:05:19,679 I know, sweetie. Come here. 96 00:05:21,791 --> 00:05:23,069 Is this a hundred percent silk? 97 00:05:24,523 --> 00:05:26,546 Lily, listen, we really need the money. 98 00:05:26,652 --> 00:05:29,417 I have some leads on a job, but until then, I just... 99 00:05:29,831 --> 00:05:31,038 I don't know what else we can do. 100 00:05:32,774 --> 00:05:34,459 I'll sell my paintings! 101 00:05:35,281 --> 00:05:35,867 What? 102 00:05:36,073 --> 00:05:37,877 Yeah, I'll sell my paintings. 103 00:05:37,913 --> 00:05:40,509 Good oil paintings go for like, $500. 104 00:05:41,111 --> 00:05:43,008 Yeah. Totally. 105 00:05:43,464 --> 00:05:44,156 But... 106 00:05:44,261 --> 00:05:47,639 Kids, sometimes you can do something right a thousand times in a row... 107 00:05:48,094 --> 00:05:49,009 I love it. 108 00:05:49,214 --> 00:05:50,836 It's a masterpiece. 109 00:05:53,004 --> 00:05:54,679 That's it. We're selling the TV. 110 00:05:54,883 --> 00:05:57,148 I just want to come home and stare at this all day. 111 00:05:58,924 --> 00:06:00,397 Somebody call the cops! 112 00:06:00,604 --> 00:06:03,516 My wife stole an awesome painting from the museum! 113 00:06:06,291 --> 00:06:08,609 But then, that thousand-and-first time... 114 00:06:08,711 --> 00:06:11,167 ...that kind of money only goes for real paintings. 115 00:06:13,504 --> 00:06:14,786 What does that mean? 116 00:06:15,861 --> 00:06:20,228 Look, it just means that we need money right now and I'm not sure that 117 00:06:20,334 --> 00:06:22,586 selling your paintings is how we're going to get it. 118 00:06:23,124 --> 00:06:24,739 You don't believe in me. 119 00:06:26,111 --> 00:06:28,259 No, wait, wait! Of c... 120 00:06:28,464 --> 00:06:29,836 of course I believe in you! 121 00:06:30,043 --> 00:06:32,609 Marshall, I am proud of my work as an artist. 122 00:06:32,714 --> 00:06:35,928 My paintings are good. I bet Robin would buy one. 123 00:06:36,133 --> 00:06:37,137 What now? 124 00:06:38,583 --> 00:06:41,979 I love your painting, I just... I'm trying to be realistic. 125 00:06:43,042 --> 00:06:46,069 Well, how much money do we need for the contractor to finish the job? 126 00:06:46,272 --> 00:06:47,619 About 1,500 bucks. 127 00:06:48,722 --> 00:06:53,129 So, if I can sell three of my paintings at 500 bucks a pop, then 128 00:06:53,231 --> 00:06:55,047 I get to keep all my clothes. 129 00:06:55,902 --> 00:06:58,928 - We need money fast. - Well, give me a week. 130 00:07:00,653 --> 00:07:02,127 Okay, a week. 131 00:07:02,402 --> 00:07:03,497 - Fine. - Fine. 132 00:07:03,824 --> 00:07:04,958 Fine. 133 00:07:17,004 --> 00:07:20,316 Pulling. Them. Off. 134 00:07:25,311 --> 00:07:28,216 Lily's first move in the great art challenge of 2008 135 00:07:28,324 --> 00:07:31,549 was to display one of her favorite paintings at her friend's gallery. 136 00:07:31,653 --> 00:07:33,287 The night didn't go so well. 137 00:07:39,341 --> 00:07:41,318 But then at the last minute... 138 00:07:41,423 --> 00:07:43,459 - I love it. - You do? 139 00:07:43,742 --> 00:07:46,608 Your top. It's gorgeous. Is that 100% silk? 140 00:07:46,712 --> 00:07:49,706 It's not for sale! My clothes are not for sale! 141 00:07:49,921 --> 00:07:52,558 So the next day, Lily took her painting to a coffee house 142 00:07:52,656 --> 00:07:54,345 that displayed local artists. 143 00:07:54,591 --> 00:07:58,433 We've been sitting here for hours and nobody's even glanced at my painting. 144 00:07:58,935 --> 00:08:00,768 Come on. Let's start talking it up. 145 00:08:02,781 --> 00:08:04,938 I really like that painting! 146 00:08:05,141 --> 00:08:06,716 It's neat! 147 00:08:06,824 --> 00:08:08,916 The-the colors are neat. 148 00:08:09,024 --> 00:08:10,697 The-the shapes are neat. 149 00:08:11,004 --> 00:08:13,839 It's really just... neat. 150 00:08:16,012 --> 00:08:16,709 What? 151 00:08:18,051 --> 00:08:19,077 Observe. 152 00:08:20,213 --> 00:08:23,397 I think there's a dynamic quality to the brushwork that, 153 00:08:23,501 --> 00:08:25,258 combined with the fluid composition, 154 00:08:25,363 --> 00:08:28,296 creates an almost Kandinsky-like emotional resonance. 155 00:08:29,652 --> 00:08:34,296 Yes, and you can still enjoy it even if you're not a pretentious douche. 156 00:08:36,091 --> 00:08:38,007 Can you clarify something for me about your critique? 157 00:08:38,112 --> 00:08:41,387 Are the colors "neat" or are they more "neato burrito?" 158 00:08:43,424 --> 00:08:45,396 Uh, then again, red cowboy boots. 159 00:08:45,501 --> 00:08:50,066 I pull these off! I pull these off! 160 00:08:50,674 --> 00:08:52,627 You know what I hate most about Ted? 161 00:08:52,731 --> 00:08:53,568 What? 162 00:08:53,903 --> 00:08:55,756 His stupid hair. 163 00:08:56,002 --> 00:08:58,618 His stupid, lame awesome hair. 164 00:08:58,943 --> 00:09:01,287 It's so stupid and awesome. 165 00:09:03,561 --> 00:09:04,829 You know what I hate most about Ted? 166 00:09:04,862 --> 00:09:05,588 What? 167 00:09:05,671 --> 00:09:09,656 How he's always like, "Oh, I want to fall in love and have a relationship. 168 00:09:09,761 --> 00:09:13,219 I care about the people I have sex with." He's so lame. 169 00:09:13,424 --> 00:09:15,048 He's so lame and awesome. 170 00:09:17,863 --> 00:09:19,128 You know what he needs? 171 00:09:19,231 --> 00:09:22,557 He needs to see just how horrible he is when he's in a relationship. 172 00:09:22,861 --> 00:09:26,347 Yeah, and I need to show Ted that I'm over him. 173 00:09:27,064 --> 00:09:28,516 Are you thinking what I'm thinking? 174 00:09:29,474 --> 00:09:30,647 I think so. 175 00:09:30,894 --> 00:09:33,028 You're thinking of having sex with Ted? 176 00:09:35,574 --> 00:09:39,638 After four days without selling a single painting, Lily was getting desperate. 177 00:09:39,744 --> 00:09:42,846 Painting for sale! $500! 178 00:09:42,953 --> 00:09:45,829 Lifelong dream hanging in the balance! 179 00:09:47,701 --> 00:09:49,848 It's like they don't even see us. 180 00:09:49,954 --> 00:09:51,799 Yeah, we're dirt to them. 181 00:09:52,281 --> 00:09:53,969 What do you need money for? 182 00:09:54,073 --> 00:09:57,108 Oh, I'm trying to fix the hardwood floors in my new apartment. 183 00:09:57,212 --> 00:09:58,089 You? 184 00:09:58,522 --> 00:09:59,638 Heroin. 185 00:10:03,244 --> 00:10:05,598 - Do you like heroin? - Love it. 186 00:10:05,701 --> 00:10:08,769 If you sell that, I'm going to take your money and go buy some more heroin. 187 00:10:10,793 --> 00:10:13,379 Thanks for your honesty, Crazy Sock Guy. 188 00:10:15,322 --> 00:10:18,158 - Oh, I'm never gonna sell this... - It's not very good. 189 00:10:20,002 --> 00:10:22,577 And just as she was about to lose all hope, 190 00:10:22,684 --> 00:10:24,469 something amazing happened. 191 00:10:25,581 --> 00:10:26,827 Oh, my God! 192 00:10:28,044 --> 00:10:31,147 500 bucks! Who's a real painter now, Marshall? 193 00:10:31,252 --> 00:10:33,339 Honey, I never said you weren't a real painter. 194 00:10:33,544 --> 00:10:35,068 I know, sweetie. 195 00:10:35,171 --> 00:10:38,186 And since I'm a professional artist now, 196 00:10:38,291 --> 00:10:40,827 I'm going to sketch you an Aldrin original, 197 00:10:40,933 --> 00:10:44,326 you know, to say thanks for being such a supportive husband. 198 00:10:44,431 --> 00:10:46,316 I'm thinking about calling it... 199 00:10:46,423 --> 00:10:47,636 "Suck It!" 200 00:10:48,163 --> 00:10:51,557 Lily, come on. I'm proud of you. Who-who bought it? 201 00:10:51,952 --> 00:10:55,018 Well, that's the best part. A gay couple without kids. 202 00:10:55,124 --> 00:10:56,817 A G-CWOK! 203 00:10:57,082 --> 00:10:59,857 - You bagged a G-CWOK?! - Yeah, that's right. 204 00:10:59,962 --> 00:11:02,707 They are the heart and soul of the art-buying community. 205 00:11:02,811 --> 00:11:05,216 You know what you should do? You should call up the G-CWOKs 206 00:11:05,321 --> 00:11:07,616 and offer them a free painting if they throw a private art party 207 00:11:07,721 --> 00:11:09,336 for all their G-CWOK friends. 208 00:11:09,443 --> 00:11:12,407 That's an amazing idea. I'm going to go call them. 209 00:11:12,511 --> 00:11:15,717 I can probably sell two more paintings with time to spare. 210 00:11:16,211 --> 00:11:19,857 Oh, wait, Marshall. There was something I had to tell you. What was it? 211 00:11:19,961 --> 00:11:21,358 Oh, that's right. 212 00:11:21,492 --> 00:11:22,507 Suck it. 213 00:11:30,022 --> 00:11:31,067 Hey. 214 00:11:31,454 --> 00:11:34,066 Ted, fancy bumping into you here. 215 00:11:34,331 --> 00:11:36,478 Have you guys met my girlfriend Abby? 216 00:11:37,051 --> 00:11:40,159 - Uh, yeah. Hi, Abby. So... - Hello, Abby. 217 00:11:40,654 --> 00:11:42,126 So you guys are dating now? 218 00:11:42,321 --> 00:11:43,197 That's right. 219 00:11:43,653 --> 00:11:45,937 I am done with this whole being awesome thing. 220 00:11:46,182 --> 00:11:48,418 Now I'm all about farmers' markets and 221 00:11:48,522 --> 00:11:51,746 day hikes in matching khaki cargo shorts. Isn't that right, sweetie? 222 00:11:51,953 --> 00:11:54,777 That's right. And girlfriends are lame. 223 00:11:54,881 --> 00:11:57,257 Unless they're me. I miss you, Ted. 224 00:11:58,504 --> 00:12:00,506 Abby and I are in love. 225 00:12:00,851 --> 00:12:02,826 Not hot passionate love. 226 00:12:02,934 --> 00:12:04,239 Couple love. 227 00:12:04,342 --> 00:12:06,718 You know, movie night with my girlfriend, 228 00:12:06,824 --> 00:12:08,488 then waiting for her to go to bed 229 00:12:08,594 --> 00:12:11,437 so I can steal one pitiful moment of hollow ecstasy 230 00:12:11,541 --> 00:12:13,936 by the cold, blue light of my computer monitor. 231 00:12:15,184 --> 00:12:17,407 We're showing Ted how lame he is. 232 00:12:17,641 --> 00:12:19,618 You don't have to say it, though. 233 00:12:20,144 --> 00:12:22,776 Uh, okay, Barney, you can stop. 234 00:12:22,982 --> 00:12:25,128 Stop what, Ted? Stop being in love? 235 00:12:25,234 --> 00:12:27,409 Next he'll ask us to stop breathing. 236 00:12:28,351 --> 00:12:30,177 We can't stop breathing, Ted. 237 00:12:30,284 --> 00:12:31,959 Your hair looks amazing. 238 00:12:33,704 --> 00:12:36,537 Barney, I, I see what you're doing. Please stop. 239 00:12:36,742 --> 00:12:40,756 Not before I share with you what being in a relationship leads to, Ted. 240 00:12:41,402 --> 00:12:43,887 Abby, Pookie Bear... 241 00:12:44,521 --> 00:12:48,507 I am so pathetically desperate for you, that... 242 00:12:48,894 --> 00:12:50,898 aw, heck, I'll just say it. 243 00:12:54,022 --> 00:12:57,146 - Will you marry me? - Wait, really? 244 00:12:57,681 --> 00:13:00,358 I would never joke about true love. 245 00:13:01,462 --> 00:13:03,967 - Yes, I'll marry you. - Okay. 246 00:13:05,664 --> 00:13:07,696 Thank you, thank you. 247 00:13:08,121 --> 00:13:10,118 I have to call my mom. 248 00:13:11,371 --> 00:13:12,579 That's you. 249 00:13:14,074 --> 00:13:16,256 Uh, yeah, I don't think Abby knows you're kidding. 250 00:13:16,361 --> 00:13:17,919 Uh, yes, she does. 251 00:13:18,194 --> 00:13:20,107 It finally happened, Mama. 252 00:13:20,292 --> 00:13:22,916 I just wish Daddy were alive to walk me down the aisle. 253 00:13:24,633 --> 00:13:26,297 Totally committed to the bit. 254 00:13:27,521 --> 00:13:30,559 Yes, Lily Aldrin. I sold you the painting earlier today. 255 00:13:30,762 --> 00:13:32,239 Oh, honey, hello. 256 00:13:32,341 --> 00:13:33,559 You sound happy. 257 00:13:33,764 --> 00:13:35,899 Are you kidding? We're popping the champagne right now. 258 00:13:36,762 --> 00:13:40,069 Well, I just wanted to offer you an exclusive chance 259 00:13:40,171 --> 00:13:42,146 to view some of my other paintings. 260 00:13:42,354 --> 00:13:46,408 Oh, honey, oh, sweetie, oh, I guess I should have told you. 261 00:13:46,601 --> 00:13:48,316 We just bought that for the frame. 262 00:13:49,214 --> 00:13:49,916 What? 263 00:13:50,023 --> 00:13:51,808 Yeah, it's an original Anton Kreutzer, 264 00:13:51,913 --> 00:13:53,827 a very rare frame from the turn of the century. 265 00:13:54,444 --> 00:13:57,459 So... you didn't like my painting? 266 00:13:57,663 --> 00:14:00,667 Oh, honey, oh, sweetie, no, not at all. 267 00:14:01,343 --> 00:14:03,636 But you know, good for you. 268 00:14:07,282 --> 00:14:10,488 Well, if you didn't want the painting, can I... 269 00:14:10,843 --> 00:14:12,817 can I at least get it back? 270 00:14:13,101 --> 00:14:15,478 Yeah, no, we don't have it anymore. 271 00:14:16,102 --> 00:14:17,016 Where is it? 272 00:14:19,352 --> 00:14:20,297 I see. 273 00:14:22,014 --> 00:14:23,569 H-He threw out my painting. 274 00:14:25,233 --> 00:14:27,486 Champagne for everyone, on me, 275 00:14:27,752 --> 00:14:30,118 the happiest guy in the world. 276 00:14:32,762 --> 00:14:34,397 Ginger ale. It's a bit. 277 00:14:37,482 --> 00:14:38,826 This is great. 278 00:14:38,934 --> 00:14:40,966 My dream of becoming an artist is dead, 279 00:14:41,073 --> 00:14:44,967 and now I'm watching my wardrobe disappear piece by piece. 280 00:14:45,781 --> 00:14:47,488 There goes my favorite dress. 281 00:14:48,712 --> 00:14:50,128 This dress meant a lot to me. 282 00:14:50,491 --> 00:14:52,328 - Really? - Yeah. 283 00:14:52,551 --> 00:14:56,849 It was spring of 2004 and I had been having a hard few months. 284 00:14:59,111 --> 00:15:00,916 Day-am. 285 00:15:02,111 --> 00:15:04,659 I got a two-syllable "damn" in this dress. 286 00:15:05,032 --> 00:15:06,989 A two-syllable "damn." 287 00:15:07,554 --> 00:15:09,278 - That's the dream. - Yeah. 288 00:15:09,684 --> 00:15:15,656 Now she belongs to... CanadaGirl@MetroNewsOne.com. 289 00:15:15,981 --> 00:15:17,408 It's still in the family. 290 00:15:19,083 --> 00:15:21,166 Lily, you're not going to believe this. 291 00:15:21,492 --> 00:15:23,087 - Something amazing happened. - What? 292 00:15:23,641 --> 00:15:25,346 I went to the G-CWOK's apartment. 293 00:15:25,512 --> 00:15:26,676 Really? Why? 294 00:15:26,784 --> 00:15:28,338 Because I felt guilty. 295 00:15:28,633 --> 00:15:31,437 This auction was my idea and now you've had to sit around all day 296 00:15:31,541 --> 00:15:35,806 while a bunch of vultures ruthlessly pick apart the carcass of your wardrobe. 297 00:15:38,151 --> 00:15:39,917 It's still in the family. 298 00:15:40,313 --> 00:15:41,658 And more importantly, 299 00:15:41,764 --> 00:15:43,707 I honestly love that painting and 300 00:15:43,812 --> 00:15:46,438 I couldn't stand to think of it in a trashcan someplace. 301 00:15:46,883 --> 00:15:48,158 Well, what happened? 302 00:15:49,683 --> 00:15:50,917 Well, hello. 303 00:15:51,023 --> 00:15:55,266 Hi, um... Lawrence. I'm here about the painting my wife Lily sold you... 304 00:15:55,572 --> 00:15:57,227 the one in the nice frame. 305 00:15:57,573 --> 00:16:01,319 Talk about a nice frame. My, my, you are a big one, aren't you? 306 00:16:01,421 --> 00:16:04,167 And you're married to that little bit of a thing. How does that work? 307 00:16:04,864 --> 00:16:06,157 I'd like to find out. 308 00:16:07,051 --> 00:16:08,848 Yeah, we get it. Gay guys like you. 309 00:16:09,413 --> 00:16:10,846 No, Lily, 310 00:16:11,202 --> 00:16:13,567 they love me, but that's not the important part. 311 00:16:13,783 --> 00:16:15,336 Here's the important part. 312 00:16:15,723 --> 00:16:18,547 Since you're clearly a man of impeccable taste and style, 313 00:16:18,654 --> 00:16:20,489 I came down here to ask you: 314 00:16:21,832 --> 00:16:23,678 what do you think of the boots? 315 00:16:29,231 --> 00:16:29,988 Boots. 316 00:16:35,323 --> 00:16:38,326 Pulling. Them. Off. 317 00:16:42,282 --> 00:16:43,568 I'll be in the cab. 318 00:16:48,193 --> 00:16:49,547 G-CWOK-approved. 319 00:16:49,752 --> 00:16:50,876 The painting. 320 00:16:51,313 --> 00:16:54,389 Right, so, um, they told me they threw it in the building's Dumpster. 321 00:16:55,053 --> 00:16:58,657 It wasn't in there, but the super told me that he'd seen one Dr. Greer, 322 00:16:58,762 --> 00:17:00,188 a veterinarian who works in the building, 323 00:17:00,293 --> 00:17:01,847 take the painting out of the trash. 324 00:17:02,172 --> 00:17:06,199 Dr. Greer? Who's Dr. Greer and why did he take my painting? 325 00:17:06,844 --> 00:17:08,338 You're about to find out. 326 00:17:10,392 --> 00:17:12,266 Long story short, I had to make a trash run. 327 00:17:12,373 --> 00:17:14,069 Been a busy day... lots of neuterings. 328 00:17:14,172 --> 00:17:15,357 Ooh, we don't need the details. 329 00:17:15,462 --> 00:17:17,167 Oh, no no no, it's not what you think. 330 00:17:17,604 --> 00:17:19,977 Yeah, yeah, yeah, mostly just dog testicles. Anyway... 331 00:17:21,202 --> 00:17:22,796 I noticed your painting 332 00:17:22,903 --> 00:17:27,206 just sitting right there on top and I thought, "Hey, free painting," 333 00:17:28,063 --> 00:17:31,636 so I brought it upstairs and hung it up in Exam Room 3, 334 00:17:31,741 --> 00:17:34,146 and then the strangest thing happened. 335 00:17:36,534 --> 00:17:38,217 Hey, Muffin. 336 00:17:39,684 --> 00:17:42,516 Whoa, I think he remembers me from the last time he was here. 337 00:17:44,393 --> 00:17:47,218 Take Muffin to Exam Room 3. I'll meet you there. 338 00:17:48,604 --> 00:17:50,727 I went in, expecting the worst. 339 00:17:53,302 --> 00:17:56,337 I'd never seen Muffin that calm, 340 00:17:56,702 --> 00:18:00,686 and then a little later the same thing happened again with Tidbit... 341 00:18:01,251 --> 00:18:02,956 and King Larry... 342 00:18:04,222 --> 00:18:07,199 and again with the Weinstein triplets. 343 00:18:09,924 --> 00:18:11,459 Something about your art 344 00:18:11,564 --> 00:18:14,789 speaks to the canine sensibility on a very primal level. 345 00:18:15,022 --> 00:18:18,088 - Really? Dogs like my paintings? - Yeah. 346 00:18:18,294 --> 00:18:20,889 But you know who it bums out? Birds. 347 00:18:22,194 --> 00:18:24,638 Had a parrot in there today. He took one look at it, 348 00:18:24,744 --> 00:18:27,849 pried open his cage, flew right into the ceiling fan. 349 00:18:31,972 --> 00:18:34,107 Anyway, because your first painting worked so well, 350 00:18:34,211 --> 00:18:36,276 I convinced Dr. Greer to buy four more. 351 00:18:36,482 --> 00:18:39,049 - Really? - At $500 a piece. 352 00:18:39,154 --> 00:18:42,106 That's two grand. That's more than we need for the contractor. 353 00:18:42,321 --> 00:18:44,696 Yeah, but I was actually thinking we could reinvest it. 354 00:18:44,802 --> 00:18:46,459 - In what? - In you. 355 00:18:50,812 --> 00:18:53,348 Marshall explained that he was building a fancy new Web site 356 00:18:53,454 --> 00:18:57,129 specifically to sell Lily's artwork to veterinarians. 357 00:18:58,894 --> 00:19:02,137 Well, it's not exactly the clientele I had in mind, but... 358 00:19:03,031 --> 00:19:05,269 thank you for believing in me. 359 00:19:10,793 --> 00:19:13,999 Man, birds do not get you. 360 00:19:25,154 --> 00:19:26,158 Hi, sweetie. 361 00:19:26,262 --> 00:19:28,018 Hey, I think I left my tie here. Have you seen it? 362 00:19:28,271 --> 00:19:30,809 No, I'm in wedding-planning mode. 363 00:19:31,064 --> 00:19:33,588 Stressville. Population: me. Okay, big decision. 364 00:19:33,791 --> 00:19:37,088 What do you think the cake should be: Fudgie the Whale or Cookie Puss? 365 00:19:37,881 --> 00:19:40,929 Yeah, that was a bit. We were doing a bit. 366 00:19:41,383 --> 00:19:44,277 So I'm thinking Labor Day. I was going to say Fourth of July, 367 00:19:44,382 --> 00:19:47,846 but I don't want to steal any attention away from America. 368 00:19:49,754 --> 00:19:52,187 Abby, I've... I've got some bad news. 369 00:19:53,361 --> 00:19:55,227 - I can't marry you. - What? 370 00:19:55,581 --> 00:19:59,716 Ted begged me not to. I think he's in love with you. 371 00:19:59,823 --> 00:20:02,478 - Really? - Yes, our plan worked, 372 00:20:02,582 --> 00:20:04,867 better than we ever dreamed. You have to go to him. 373 00:20:06,931 --> 00:20:09,169 Here's his home address. But you know what? He works late, 374 00:20:09,273 --> 00:20:11,539 so I wouldn't go before 2:00 or 3:00 in the morning. 375 00:20:11,914 --> 00:20:15,796 Oh, my God, thank you. But now I feel wrong keeping this. 376 00:20:15,901 --> 00:20:19,217 Oh, yeah, I wouldn't worry about that. That's made of candy. 377 00:20:19,791 --> 00:20:20,646 Later. 378 00:20:26,784 --> 00:20:30,706 Hey, go to lilyandmarshallselltheirstuff.com or charityfolks.com. 379 00:20:30,811 --> 00:20:32,447 We're having an auction to raise money 380 00:20:32,553 --> 00:20:34,208 for the children's hospital of Los Angeles. 381 00:20:34,314 --> 00:20:37,208 You can get a tone of cool stuff from the show and it's all for a great cause. 382 00:20:37,312 --> 00:20:38,596 - Thanks. - Thanks.