1 00:00:01,169 --> 00:00:04,305 You know the kind of guy who does nothing but bad things... 2 00:00:04,338 --> 00:00:07,175 and then wonders why his life sucks? 3 00:00:07,208 --> 00:00:11,145 Well, that was me. Every time somethin' good happened to me, 4 00:00:11,179 --> 00:00:13,281 somethin' bad was always waitin' around the corner. 5 00:00:15,516 --> 00:00:17,118 Karma. 6 00:00:17,151 --> 00:00:19,220 That's when I realized I had to change. 7 00:00:20,754 --> 00:00:23,424 So I made a list of everything bad I've ever done, 8 00:00:23,457 --> 00:00:26,394 and, one by one, I'm gonna make up for all my mistakes. 9 00:00:26,427 --> 00:00:28,362 I'm just tryin' to be a better person. 10 00:00:28,396 --> 00:00:30,764 My name is Earl. 11 00:00:34,402 --> 00:00:37,338 Good morning. 12 00:00:37,371 --> 00:00:40,741 Could I have two beers and three of them pink eggs out of the big jar, please? 13 00:00:40,774 --> 00:00:43,144 You got it. 14 00:00:43,177 --> 00:00:46,380 Hey, everybody! I'm Gus, the Camden County Fair bear. 15 00:00:46,414 --> 00:00:48,516 Who's ready for some fun? 16 00:00:48,549 --> 00:00:53,254 Enjoy food, fun, prizes, an Osama bin Laden shooting gallery. 17 00:00:53,287 --> 00:00:57,325 And this year, get your picture taken inside the actual car... 18 00:00:57,358 --> 00:00:59,360 from Smokey and the Bandit. 19 00:00:59,393 --> 00:01:02,130 It's gonna be bear-tastic. 20 00:01:02,163 --> 00:01:04,398 It's here. It's here! 21 00:01:04,432 --> 00:01:07,335 Earl. Earl, it's here! It's here! 22 00:01:07,368 --> 00:01:10,338 [ Earl Narrating ] Every year there are three things Randy gets excited about-- 23 00:01:10,371 --> 00:01:15,243 amnesty day at the adult video store, the high school cheerleader bikini dog wash... 24 00:01:15,276 --> 00:01:16,744 and the Camden County Fair. 25 00:01:16,777 --> 00:01:19,413 What exactly is a county fair? 26 00:01:19,447 --> 00:01:21,349 It's like Disneyland for poor people. 27 00:01:21,382 --> 00:01:23,651 They got a Ferris wheel, bumper boats, bands you thought were dead. 28 00:01:23,684 --> 00:01:25,619 Last year, they had the world's tallest midget. 29 00:01:25,653 --> 00:01:27,555 He was as tall as you, Earl, remember? 30 00:01:27,588 --> 00:01:29,590 I think that might have been a scam, Randy. 31 00:01:29,623 --> 00:01:32,360 I don't know. That was one tall midget. 32 00:01:32,393 --> 00:01:34,728 This year, they got the car from Smokey and the Bandit. 33 00:01:34,762 --> 00:01:39,300 - What is Smokey and the Bandit? - Only the best movie ever made. 34 00:01:39,333 --> 00:01:41,402 Hurry up, Earl. I wanna get down there... 35 00:01:41,435 --> 00:01:44,272 before the lines are too long for the world's smallest giant. 36 00:01:44,305 --> 00:01:47,341 We'll go, right after I cross somethin' off my list. 37 00:01:48,876 --> 00:01:52,180 But you did two yesterday. Can't you take the day off? 38 00:01:52,213 --> 00:01:55,149 Randy, I can't enjoy myself at the fair unless I cross somethin' off. 39 00:01:55,183 --> 00:01:57,485 All right, well, pick something easy. I will. 40 00:01:57,518 --> 00:01:59,553 Not the deaf girl. That's gonna take forever. 41 00:01:59,587 --> 00:02:04,325 Here we go. Number 139-- stole beer from a golfer. 42 00:02:04,358 --> 00:02:06,294 [ Chattering ] 43 00:02:08,396 --> 00:02:10,931 [ Earl Narrating ] About seven months ago, I was playing a game of chance... 44 00:02:10,964 --> 00:02:13,467 with a few of my friends over at the local country club. 45 00:02:15,203 --> 00:02:17,805 Son of a bitch. 46 00:02:17,838 --> 00:02:21,475 That's it for me, Pablo. I'm tapped out. 47 00:02:21,509 --> 00:02:23,777 Good luck, fellas. Good night. 48 00:02:37,425 --> 00:02:41,229 Cashew. Fancy. 49 00:02:41,262 --> 00:02:45,366 Beers are on me, boys. I just got a hole in one. [ Men Cheering ] 50 00:02:49,002 --> 00:02:51,505 Here you go, sir. 51 00:02:51,539 --> 00:02:54,308 [ Earl Narrating ] To some people a free beer might not mean too much, 52 00:02:54,342 --> 00:02:57,345 but for a guy who just lost his last $12... 53 00:02:57,378 --> 00:03:01,682 and is stuffing free nuts in his pocket, it's a lifesaver. 54 00:03:01,715 --> 00:03:06,387 I explained to Randy how this guy buys drinks after he gets one of these holes in ones, 55 00:03:06,420 --> 00:03:09,690 and the next Saturday we went back for more free beer. 56 00:03:09,723 --> 00:03:12,660 To make sure we looked like we belonged there, 57 00:03:12,693 --> 00:03:16,797 we went by the thrift store and picked up some golfing clothes. 58 00:03:18,366 --> 00:03:19,967 Hey. 59 00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:23,871 You just finished playing a golf match contest? 60 00:03:23,904 --> 00:03:26,574 - Yep. - You get any holes in ones? 61 00:03:26,607 --> 00:03:29,610 - No. - You sure? You got one last week. 62 00:03:29,643 --> 00:03:31,545 Yeah. Yeah, I'm pretty sure I didn't. 63 00:03:32,780 --> 00:03:35,616 - What'd you shoot? - Who, me? 64 00:03:35,649 --> 00:03:37,718 Yeah. You get any birdies out there? 65 00:03:41,355 --> 00:03:43,724 I got... 12. 66 00:03:43,757 --> 00:03:46,460 You got 12 birdies? How many under were you? 67 00:03:46,494 --> 00:03:48,696 I, um-- 68 00:03:48,729 --> 00:03:52,466 Excuse me. I have to go call my banker. 69 00:03:55,803 --> 00:03:59,540 What's that guy's handicap? Ah, he's just a little slow, that's all. 70 00:03:59,573 --> 00:04:02,310 [ Earl Narrating ] Turns out, holes in ones don't happen that often. 71 00:04:04,345 --> 00:04:06,714 So, we decided to help things out a little. 72 00:04:22,596 --> 00:04:27,401 Oh! [ Shouting ] 73 00:04:27,435 --> 00:04:29,570 Guess who just got another hole in one? 74 00:04:29,603 --> 00:04:32,440 [ All Cheering ] 75 00:04:41,081 --> 00:04:45,719 Every Saturday, Randy and I would make sure this guy hit a perfect shot. 76 00:04:45,753 --> 00:04:49,690 Next Saturday, if I break 80, I'm buying all you guys lunch, huh? 77 00:04:49,723 --> 00:04:51,892 [ All Cheering ] 78 00:04:51,925 --> 00:04:55,729 Knowing that we could start gettin' free lunch with our free beer, 79 00:04:55,763 --> 00:04:59,367 Randy and I made sure this guy had the game of his life. 80 00:05:07,975 --> 00:05:10,911 Guys, you aren't gonna believe this, but I just got another hole in one... 81 00:05:10,944 --> 00:05:13,881 and the new course record. No way! 82 00:05:13,914 --> 00:05:16,884 You're the man! Hey, let's get these boys some hot wings, 83 00:05:16,917 --> 00:05:19,753 and make 'em spicy, 'cause I'm on fire. He's on fire! 84 00:05:19,787 --> 00:05:23,724 Yeah! Yeah! Make mine mild. I got a sensitive tongue. 85 00:05:23,757 --> 00:05:27,661 Every Saturday we would make sure the golfer played good enough to pay our bar tab. 86 00:05:29,162 --> 00:05:30,731 Ow! 87 00:05:30,764 --> 00:05:32,866 Things were great, 88 00:05:32,900 --> 00:05:35,636 until Randy started bragging to everyone at the Crab Shack. 89 00:05:35,669 --> 00:05:37,805 Guess who just got another-- 90 00:05:40,608 --> 00:05:43,577 That was the day they started checking I.D.'s at the door. 91 00:05:43,611 --> 00:05:46,914 The free ride was over. 92 00:05:46,947 --> 00:05:50,083 All I have to do is buy that golfer some beer. Easy enough for you? 93 00:05:50,117 --> 00:05:53,020 Eastbound and down. Let's do it, Snowman. 94 00:05:53,053 --> 00:05:56,424 You mean the Bandit. I'm the Bandit, you're Snowman. 95 00:05:56,457 --> 00:05:58,559 How come you always get to be the Bandit? 96 00:05:58,592 --> 00:06:01,028 'Cause I got a mustache. You gotta have a mustache to be the Bandit. 97 00:06:01,061 --> 00:06:03,831 My mother could be the Bandit. 98 00:06:05,799 --> 00:06:09,837 - I can't believe you did that. - I know. It's crazy. 99 00:06:09,870 --> 00:06:13,674 But it's true. It's right here on my list-- "Stole beer from a golfer." 100 00:06:13,707 --> 00:06:16,410 I'm here to make things right. So if you wanna give me a hand, 101 00:06:16,444 --> 00:06:18,979 we can load this beer into your car, and I'll be on my way. 102 00:06:19,012 --> 00:06:22,182 We're going to the fair. You know, the one the bear talks about on TV. 103 00:06:22,215 --> 00:06:25,886 You were fixing my games. 104 00:06:25,919 --> 00:06:28,456 I thought I had mastered golf. I was gonna go pro. 105 00:06:28,489 --> 00:06:31,825 This is why I've been so bad lately. I just thought I was in a slump. 106 00:06:31,859 --> 00:06:35,596 I've done nothing for the past five months except try to get good again. 107 00:06:35,629 --> 00:06:40,801 I had a tendon from my thigh put in my arm to try to get more release from my drives. 108 00:06:40,834 --> 00:06:45,906 Well, now you can stop wasting your time and start drinking some free beer. 109 00:06:45,939 --> 00:06:48,542 Go ahead and pop open your trunk. 110 00:06:48,576 --> 00:06:51,178 We'll get these cases in there so I can cross you off my list. 111 00:06:51,211 --> 00:06:54,147 Sure. Whatever. 112 00:06:57,785 --> 00:07:01,221 Your trunk's kind of full. How you gonna get all this beer back to your house? 113 00:07:01,254 --> 00:07:02,923 This is my house. 114 00:07:02,956 --> 00:07:04,958 You live in your car? Cool. 115 00:07:04,992 --> 00:07:08,729 I kind of remember something about you having some sort of fancy job or something. 116 00:07:08,762 --> 00:07:14,101 I was an accountant at Buckland and Simon, but I got fired after I kind of lost my focus. 117 00:07:14,134 --> 00:07:16,537 [ Man ] About six points from-- 118 00:07:18,939 --> 00:07:20,941 Sorry. 119 00:07:20,974 --> 00:07:24,545 I had a, uh, uh, doctor's appointment. 120 00:07:28,649 --> 00:07:32,620 Once I got obsessed with golf, it's all I thought about. I lost everything. 121 00:07:32,653 --> 00:07:36,056 But now you have beer. So sometimes things work out. 122 00:07:36,089 --> 00:07:39,493 Thanks for telling me the truth. You can cross me off your list thing. 123 00:07:39,527 --> 00:07:42,195 - Go have fun at the fair. - Oh, we will. 124 00:07:42,229 --> 00:07:46,199 [ Singsongy ] Fair, fair, fair, fair, fair, fair, fair. 125 00:07:49,670 --> 00:07:51,705 Sorry again. See ya. 126 00:07:51,739 --> 00:07:53,674 Fair, fair, fair, fair, fair, fair, fair. 127 00:07:58,211 --> 00:08:01,582 He doesn't look happy. Who? 128 00:08:01,615 --> 00:08:05,118 Scott, the guy living in his car. It's my fault, Randy. 129 00:08:05,152 --> 00:08:08,689 I ruined his life. I gotta fix it. 130 00:08:08,722 --> 00:08:10,758 Fix what? He's got a nice car. 131 00:08:10,791 --> 00:08:14,194 It's got a TV in it, Earl. 132 00:08:14,227 --> 00:08:17,631 I'm not done with him until I get him his job back. 133 00:08:17,665 --> 00:08:19,633 Gus, the fair bear here. 134 00:08:19,667 --> 00:08:22,936 Three days left and then the fair goes into hibernation. 135 00:08:22,970 --> 00:08:26,106 So don't get caught napping. Come to the fair. It's bear-riffic! 136 00:08:28,041 --> 00:08:29,977 Bear-riffic. 137 00:08:32,580 --> 00:08:34,514 Bear-riffic. 138 00:08:40,788 --> 00:08:44,224 I wanted 'em to take me seriously when I went to try and get Scott his job back, 139 00:08:44,257 --> 00:08:48,028 so I wore the suit my public defender bought me. 140 00:08:48,061 --> 00:08:52,633 So wait a minute. You made him think he was great at golf just to get free beer? 141 00:08:52,666 --> 00:08:56,236 - Yes, we did. - Unbelievable! 142 00:08:56,269 --> 00:08:58,271 Will you take him back? 143 00:08:58,305 --> 00:09:00,941 Sure I'll take him back, just for the jokes alone. 144 00:09:00,974 --> 00:09:03,010 [ Laughing ] 145 00:09:04,712 --> 00:09:06,914 Hello? 146 00:09:06,947 --> 00:09:09,817 Oh, hey, Earl. Coffee? 147 00:09:09,850 --> 00:09:11,852 Got your job back, buddy. 148 00:09:11,885 --> 00:09:15,222 You're kidding. That's amazing. Thank you so much. 149 00:09:15,255 --> 00:09:19,092 - That's what I do-- I fix things. - Wow. 150 00:09:19,126 --> 00:09:22,262 Too bad I don't have my girlfriend back. Then things would be perfect. 151 00:09:22,295 --> 00:09:25,098 - Your who? - Tess. 152 00:09:25,132 --> 00:09:27,735 Turns out Scott lost more than just his job-- 153 00:09:27,768 --> 00:09:30,738 [ Golf Club Swinging ] when he became obsessed with golf. 154 00:09:30,771 --> 00:09:32,806 [ Golf Club Swinging ] 155 00:09:34,942 --> 00:09:38,045 Honey, would you mind scooching down to the other end of the couch? 156 00:09:38,078 --> 00:09:40,781 I can see you moving around in my backswing, and it's a little distracting. 157 00:09:47,154 --> 00:09:49,923 I'm breaking up with you. 158 00:09:49,957 --> 00:09:54,027 When I get back home, I want you out. 159 00:09:54,061 --> 00:09:59,066 Okay, honey. You have fun. 160 00:09:59,099 --> 00:10:01,969 Would you grab my new putting machine from the car on the way back up, please? 161 00:10:03,704 --> 00:10:05,673 What's wrong with me? 162 00:10:05,706 --> 00:10:08,742 Let's go call your girlfriend. 163 00:10:08,776 --> 00:10:11,078 No, no. You don't have to do that. 164 00:10:11,111 --> 00:10:13,346 Yes, I do, Scott. Yes, I do. 165 00:10:15,415 --> 00:10:17,718 [ Moans ] 166 00:10:17,751 --> 00:10:21,689 Hey, everybody, only two days left to see the car from Smokey and the Bandit. 167 00:10:21,722 --> 00:10:23,891 It's bear-awesome! 168 00:10:23,924 --> 00:10:28,295 Oh, man, it is bear-awesome. We're never gonna make it to the fair. 169 00:10:28,328 --> 00:10:33,266 She took the phone off the hook. Don't worry. We'll get her. 170 00:10:33,300 --> 00:10:36,937 And then we'll go to the fair. We just have to figure out how to get his girl back. 171 00:10:36,970 --> 00:10:39,006 What would the Bandit do, Bandit? 172 00:10:39,039 --> 00:10:42,242 Bandit wouldn't have lost the girl in the first place. 173 00:10:42,275 --> 00:10:44,678 No, he wouldn't have. 174 00:10:44,712 --> 00:10:46,880 But guys from other movies have. 175 00:10:50,951 --> 00:10:53,386 Maybe the Bandit never had to get a girl back, 176 00:10:53,420 --> 00:10:56,356 but I did see a movie once where the guy from Ferris Bueller did. 177 00:10:56,389 --> 00:10:58,926 So I thought we'd try that. 178 00:10:58,959 --> 00:11:01,128 What the hell are you doing? 179 00:11:01,161 --> 00:11:04,131 - Is that a cross? - No. 180 00:11:04,164 --> 00:11:07,267 No, no. God, no! That's my seven iron resting on top of the-- 181 00:11:09,402 --> 00:11:11,839 I'm trying to show my old girlfriend I'm giving up golf. 182 00:11:11,872 --> 00:11:16,476 - She lives right above you. Sorry. - Scott? 183 00:11:16,509 --> 00:11:18,345 What are you doing? 184 00:11:18,378 --> 00:11:23,150 - I'm proving my love. - By burning a swastika in my yard? 185 00:11:23,183 --> 00:11:26,854 - What? Oh, man! - I got it. 186 00:11:26,887 --> 00:11:31,124 I'm burning my golf clubs 'cause I'm done with golf. I'll do anything to get you back. 187 00:11:31,158 --> 00:11:34,261 I never should have put golf ahead of you. Please forgive me. 188 00:11:34,294 --> 00:11:36,296 I miss you. 189 00:11:36,329 --> 00:11:40,367 [ Sighs ] I miss you too. 190 00:11:40,400 --> 00:11:44,237 - [ Earl ] Damn it! - Who is that? 191 00:11:44,271 --> 00:11:47,374 That's Earl. I'm on his list. How you doin'? 192 00:11:47,407 --> 00:11:50,377 Hi. Oh, your foot is on fire. 193 00:11:50,410 --> 00:11:52,780 Hmm? [ Gasps ] 194 00:11:52,813 --> 00:11:54,915 [ Screaming ] Get it off! Get it off! 195 00:11:59,019 --> 00:12:00,453 [ Glass Smashing ] 196 00:12:03,857 --> 00:12:06,059 - We're not moving! - Sorry, sir. 197 00:12:11,264 --> 00:12:14,334 Well, that's the last one. You're officially moved back in. 198 00:12:14,367 --> 00:12:18,205 [ Car Horn Honking ] Hold on. 199 00:12:20,407 --> 00:12:22,943 I'm comin'. 200 00:12:24,477 --> 00:12:29,149 Okay. You got your job back, your girlfriend. 201 00:12:29,182 --> 00:12:33,220 You're moved back into your old place. I think we're done. 202 00:12:33,253 --> 00:12:37,190 Thank you so much. This is so great. Life is back to normal again. 203 00:12:37,224 --> 00:12:40,227 Poochie. Poochie. 204 00:12:40,260 --> 00:12:42,362 Come here, boy! Poochie! Poochie. 205 00:12:42,395 --> 00:12:45,298 Uh, S-Scott? Huh? 206 00:12:45,332 --> 00:12:47,367 Poochie's gone. 207 00:12:47,400 --> 00:12:49,369 What do you mean? 208 00:12:49,402 --> 00:12:53,040 When you left, I had to take a second job to pay the rent. 209 00:12:53,073 --> 00:12:56,143 I couldn't take care of him. I gave him up for adoption. 210 00:13:04,151 --> 00:13:06,519 [ Sighs ] I'll find your dog. 211 00:13:06,553 --> 00:13:10,223 - What? - It's my fault he's gone. 212 00:13:10,257 --> 00:13:12,960 Just write the name of the pet adoption place... 213 00:13:12,993 --> 00:13:15,495 on the back of the picture and I'll find him. 214 00:13:15,528 --> 00:13:19,232 Okay. Great. Thanks. 215 00:13:19,266 --> 00:13:22,202 No, Earl, you've already done so much. You can cross me off the list. 216 00:13:22,235 --> 00:13:25,438 I don't mind. It doesn't matter if you mind. Karma minds. 217 00:13:25,472 --> 00:13:29,109 Your old life had a Poochie, I gotta find your Poochie. 218 00:13:29,142 --> 00:13:31,278 That's how the list works. 219 00:13:31,311 --> 00:13:35,048 Come on, Bandit. We got a long way to go and a short time to get there. 220 00:13:35,082 --> 00:13:38,952 Sorry, Snowman. We got a little longer to go. 221 00:13:38,986 --> 00:13:42,389 - You guys are gonna find Poochie. - No, no, Earl. The fair. 222 00:13:42,422 --> 00:13:44,591 Excuse us. 223 00:13:44,624 --> 00:13:46,459 I hate you. 224 00:13:49,396 --> 00:13:52,232 Look, I have to do this. The fair. It's almost over. 225 00:13:52,265 --> 00:13:54,301 Really, Randy? The fair's in town? 226 00:13:54,334 --> 00:13:56,970 This is the first time you've said anything about it. 227 00:13:57,004 --> 00:14:00,407 You said we wouldn't miss it. You'd cross something easy off your list, and then we'd go. 228 00:14:00,440 --> 00:14:03,343 What do you want me to do? Maybe if you'd quit whining... 229 00:14:03,376 --> 00:14:06,546 about the stupid fair and helped out a little more, maybe I'd be done already. 230 00:14:06,579 --> 00:14:10,183 Since when is the fair stupid? We've been going since we were little kids. 231 00:14:10,217 --> 00:14:11,919 Remember when we used to have fun? 232 00:14:11,952 --> 00:14:14,221 Life isn't about always having fun. 233 00:14:14,254 --> 00:14:17,324 Maybe it's time for you to grow up and realize that. Now go wait in the car. 234 00:14:25,565 --> 00:14:29,970 I'm sorry about that. Don't worry. I'll find your dog. But that's it, right? 235 00:14:30,003 --> 00:14:33,273 Then your life is exactly back to the way it was seven months ago? We're done? 236 00:14:33,306 --> 00:14:35,943 Yes. I think that should put everything back to normal. 237 00:14:35,976 --> 00:14:38,611 - Good. - Unless-- 238 00:14:38,645 --> 00:14:42,215 You didn't have sex with anyone else while we were broken up, did you? 239 00:14:42,249 --> 00:14:44,952 I used my hand on a guy a little. 240 00:14:47,254 --> 00:14:50,090 Yeah, I'm not sure how to un-ring that bell. 241 00:14:52,059 --> 00:14:53,593 [ Sighs ] 242 00:14:53,626 --> 00:14:56,396 Randy? Randy? 243 00:14:56,429 --> 00:14:58,631 What's going on? 244 00:14:58,665 --> 00:15:02,502 My damn brother took off with my car keys. Probably hitched a ride to the fair. 245 00:15:02,535 --> 00:15:06,506 Well, that sucks. Well, do you want a ride? I was gonna shave anyway. 246 00:15:06,539 --> 00:15:09,242 Sure. Thanks. 247 00:15:14,314 --> 00:15:17,717 He's not in there. Doesn't make sense. He's been begging to come here all week. 248 00:15:17,750 --> 00:15:21,088 Well, people are funny. When I was really into golf, 249 00:15:21,121 --> 00:15:23,991 Tess used to bug me about taking her to Colonial Williamsburg. 250 00:15:24,024 --> 00:15:26,126 After she left me, did she go? 251 00:15:26,159 --> 00:15:29,562 No. She went to Ozzfest and churned some guy's butter. 252 00:15:29,596 --> 00:15:32,565 Oh, my God. 253 00:15:32,599 --> 00:15:35,268 I'm doing the same thing you did. 254 00:15:35,302 --> 00:15:39,606 I'm obsessed with my list. My list is my golf. 255 00:15:39,639 --> 00:15:42,209 I gotta find my brother. 256 00:15:57,224 --> 00:16:00,593 [ Earl Narrating ] I wanted to tell Randy I was sorry for the way I acted. 257 00:16:03,196 --> 00:16:06,433 I figured he'd eventually show up at the Crab Shack, 258 00:16:12,339 --> 00:16:14,241 but he didn't. 259 00:16:37,197 --> 00:16:40,100 When he didn't come home all night, I started to get worried. 260 00:16:40,133 --> 00:16:43,203 I went to look for him in the one place I didn't want to find him. 261 00:16:43,236 --> 00:16:46,306 Hello there. What can I do you for? 262 00:16:46,339 --> 00:16:49,742 This guy hasn't been in here, has he? Well, yeah. He's here right now. 263 00:16:49,776 --> 00:16:52,245 Where? Right in front of me. 264 00:16:52,279 --> 00:16:55,148 That's you, silly. [ Laughing ] 265 00:16:55,182 --> 00:16:58,451 How 'bout the guy in the picture that isn't me? Have you seen him? 266 00:16:58,485 --> 00:17:01,621 Oh, yeah. Yeah, he came in. What happened? Is he okay? 267 00:17:01,654 --> 00:17:05,225 Don't worry. He just wanted to sell some of his blood for a bus ticket. 268 00:17:05,258 --> 00:17:08,395 Are you sure it was him? Yeah. I had to yell at him... 269 00:17:08,428 --> 00:17:11,631 because he was carving in that chair over there. 270 00:17:14,501 --> 00:17:17,804 Yeah, I know that's me. 271 00:17:17,837 --> 00:17:20,440 How 'bout the guy in the picture that isn't me? Have you seen him? 272 00:17:20,473 --> 00:17:24,144 Oh, yeah. I sold him a ticket to Hagerstown. Hagerstown? 273 00:17:24,177 --> 00:17:26,413 Yeah. Oh, while we're showing pictures-- 274 00:17:26,446 --> 00:17:31,218 Here's my daughter. That's her fiancé, Paul. 275 00:17:31,251 --> 00:17:35,522 He's Canadian. But not the French kind, so we're fine with it. 276 00:17:38,291 --> 00:17:40,427 [ Earl ] So he ran off to Hagerstown, 277 00:17:40,460 --> 00:17:44,697 and he took my car keys, and I couldn't follow him. 278 00:17:46,699 --> 00:17:48,801 I'm good. Thanks. 279 00:17:59,779 --> 00:18:02,515 I just hope he forgives me when I find him. 280 00:18:02,549 --> 00:18:05,685 I just can't stand the thought of him all alone somewhere, 281 00:18:05,718 --> 00:18:08,821 miserable and hatin' me. 282 00:18:22,935 --> 00:18:26,406 Stop the bus! 283 00:18:26,439 --> 00:18:30,543 Stop the-- Could you please tell him to stop the bus? 284 00:18:30,577 --> 00:18:33,846 [ Tires Skidding ] 285 00:18:36,649 --> 00:18:39,652 You went to get the dog? Yeah. 286 00:18:39,686 --> 00:18:43,156 The adoption place told me where to find him in Hagerstown. You were right, Earl. 287 00:18:43,190 --> 00:18:45,892 I shouldn't have been complaining. I should've been helping. 288 00:18:45,925 --> 00:18:48,261 Come here, Poochie. 289 00:18:48,295 --> 00:18:50,563 [ Earl Narrating ] Thing is, I wasn't right. I was dead wrong. 290 00:18:50,597 --> 00:18:53,566 Whoa! But Randy was too sweet to notice. 291 00:18:53,600 --> 00:18:57,737 That's when I realized I needed to add something to my list. 292 00:18:57,770 --> 00:19:02,275 Number 260-- neglected Randy. 293 00:19:02,309 --> 00:19:05,412 And this is one I don't ever plan on crossin' off. 294 00:19:05,445 --> 00:19:09,216 That way I won't ever stop tryin' to make it up to him. 295 00:19:09,249 --> 00:19:11,818 Come on, Randy. I bet if we get on this bus, 296 00:19:11,851 --> 00:19:15,355 we can catch the last couple hours of the fair. 297 00:19:25,332 --> 00:19:28,235 That's okay, Earl. We can go to the fair next year. 298 00:19:29,602 --> 00:19:33,273 Is that blue sugar in a bag? Yep. 299 00:19:33,306 --> 00:19:36,509 Can I have it? All right. Go ahead. 300 00:19:42,249 --> 00:19:45,385 [ Earl Narrating ] Randy was right. We would go to the fair next year, 301 00:19:45,418 --> 00:19:49,522 but I still felt like I owed him somethin' for missin' it this year. 302 00:19:54,661 --> 00:19:56,529 [ Horn Honking ] 303 00:20:03,002 --> 00:20:06,005 The Bandit car. 304 00:20:06,038 --> 00:20:09,576 Caught up with the fair outside Cumberland and convinced 'em to rent it to us for the day. 305 00:20:09,609 --> 00:20:11,811 The whole day? The whole day. 306 00:20:11,844 --> 00:20:14,581 Yep. And today, you get to be the Bandit. 307 00:20:14,614 --> 00:20:18,551 The whole day? The whole day, brother. 308 00:20:20,387 --> 00:20:22,555 [ Laughs ] Yes! 309 00:20:45,512 --> 00:20:48,781 Hey, uh, you just finished playing a golf champion? 310 00:20:50,350 --> 00:20:52,785 [ Speaking Gibberish ] 311 00:20:52,819 --> 00:20:56,589 My damn brother locked the keys. No, he didn't lock 'em. He took 'em. 312 00:20:56,623 --> 00:20:59,659 - [ Grunts ] - I wanna get down there before the lines... 313 00:20:59,692 --> 00:21:03,763 for the world's smallest giant are too big. [ Crew Laughing ] 314 00:21:03,796 --> 00:21:07,367 Your life is exactly what it was seven months of fee-pa-chew, na-ka-too. 315 00:21:07,400 --> 00:21:10,870 Look at me and I look at you. [ Chuckles ] 316 00:21:10,903 --> 00:21:12,872 He looked like a chicken "choo-keepa." 317 00:21:12,905 --> 00:21:15,975 [ Speaking Gibberish ] 318 00:21:16,008 --> 00:21:19,612 [ Gibberish Continues ] 319 00:21:21,581 --> 00:21:23,683 [ Laughing ] 320 00:21:23,716 --> 00:21:26,753 Whoo-hoo!