1 00:00:47,380 --> 00:00:51,217 One, two, three... 2 00:00:51,384 --> 00:00:53,470 ...three, three. 3 00:00:53,636 --> 00:00:54,888 Yo, what comes after three? 4 00:00:55,263 --> 00:00:57,390 Four. Four comes after three. 5 00:00:57,557 --> 00:00:59,559 -I don't hear you counting. -Four. 6 00:01:00,977 --> 00:01:02,645 Four. 7 00:01:02,812 --> 00:01:05,315 -Five. -Five. 8 00:01:05,482 --> 00:01:07,984 -Six. -Six. Faster. 9 00:01:08,151 --> 00:01:10,904 -Seven, eight. -Sims. Sims! 10 00:01:11,071 --> 00:01:12,489 You're going home. 11 00:01:21,206 --> 00:01:22,832 I'll see you around, sweet mouth. 12 00:01:24,167 --> 00:01:25,835 Inmate on deck. 13 00:01:26,503 --> 00:01:28,713 -He'll be back. -What's up, baby? 14 00:01:28,880 --> 00:01:30,423 See you around, big man. 15 00:01:31,674 --> 00:01:33,343 Gate open. 16 00:01:55,990 --> 00:01:58,159 Where the hell is this guy? 17 00:02:08,169 --> 00:02:10,380 Cal. Cal. 18 00:02:15,343 --> 00:02:17,720 -What an idiot. -Let me pop this door for my man. 19 00:02:17,887 --> 00:02:19,889 My main man, just getting home from prison. 20 00:02:22,642 --> 00:02:26,229 -Percy. -I'm sorry, Cal. 21 00:02:26,396 --> 00:02:28,064 You stupid? 22 00:02:29,732 --> 00:02:32,652 All right, wait. Hold up. So they want us to steal a diamond? 23 00:02:32,819 --> 00:02:36,823 -How much your man Walken paying? -Dig this. A hundred G's. 24 00:02:36,990 --> 00:02:38,950 A hundred G's? 25 00:02:39,159 --> 00:02:41,411 -That's good loot. -Enough to get my label started. 26 00:02:41,953 --> 00:02:44,789 Let me give you a taste of my first single. 27 00:02:47,250 --> 00:02:49,002 -It's fire. -Yeah. 28 00:02:50,420 --> 00:02:51,963 Never been shot before... 29 00:02:52,130 --> 00:02:55,592 ...but I've been beat about the skull and the neck area with a crowbar. 30 00:02:55,758 --> 00:02:57,510 Check the lyrics, check the lyrics. 31 00:02:57,969 --> 00:02:59,721 I'II take you to the butcher shop 32 00:03:00,180 --> 00:03:02,432 Let you Iick a big pork chop 33 00:03:02,599 --> 00:03:04,767 GirI, I know you Iike ham hocks 34 00:03:04,934 --> 00:03:08,229 If you're Jewish, I even got Iox Hey! Hey! 35 00:03:09,105 --> 00:03:10,440 Yo, camel-mouth. 36 00:03:10,607 --> 00:03:14,235 -That's 50 Cent. -Cal, that's not 50 Cent. 37 00:03:14,402 --> 00:03:15,695 He talk about candy. 38 00:03:16,404 --> 00:03:18,281 I'm talking about meat. 39 00:03:18,448 --> 00:03:21,117 That's a whole other level. P-Unit. 40 00:03:21,284 --> 00:03:23,453 You better off stuffing your money in a mattress. 41 00:03:23,620 --> 00:03:26,414 Yeah. I bet you gonna mess your money up... 42 00:03:26,581 --> 00:03:28,041 ...on booze and cheap hookers. 43 00:03:28,208 --> 00:03:29,459 -So? -What you need to do... 44 00:03:29,626 --> 00:03:32,086 ...is just find you a nice girl and settle down, Cal. 45 00:03:32,253 --> 00:03:34,088 Come on, P, you know that ain't happening. 46 00:03:34,255 --> 00:03:36,633 I mean, you being all short and all. 47 00:03:37,467 --> 00:03:39,302 Let me tell you something about love. 48 00:03:39,469 --> 00:03:43,056 I never had it. I don't want it. I don't need it. All right? 49 00:03:44,057 --> 00:03:46,726 You ain't gotta keep hitting me, Calvin. I'm not your child. 50 00:03:46,893 --> 00:03:50,813 How am I gonna be a hard-core rapper if you keep putting your hands on me? 51 00:03:50,980 --> 00:03:56,069 Don't push me Because I'm cIose to the edge 52 00:03:56,236 --> 00:03:59,113 Check this out. You hang in the back until Vanessa gets here. 53 00:03:59,280 --> 00:04:00,865 When I give a signal, you come out. 54 00:04:01,032 --> 00:04:02,116 That's cool. I got you. 55 00:04:02,283 --> 00:04:04,953 Hey, Jimmy, please, man. This is the biggest day of my life. 56 00:04:05,119 --> 00:04:08,414 -It's gotta go off right, okay? -Baby, what'd I tell you? I got you. 57 00:04:08,581 --> 00:04:10,083 And can I say something? 58 00:04:10,250 --> 00:04:13,002 -Congratulations, man. -Thank you. 59 00:04:13,169 --> 00:04:16,005 You done stepped up to the plate. Give me a hug, homeboy. 60 00:04:16,172 --> 00:04:19,342 Oh, man, you done did it, you know. 61 00:04:21,427 --> 00:04:24,305 Hey, man, you ain't had to do this. 62 00:04:25,306 --> 00:04:26,849 You know, the valet tripping. 63 00:04:27,016 --> 00:04:29,519 -Made me park around the corner. -Jimmy, get-- Beat it. 64 00:04:29,686 --> 00:04:31,312 -Thank you. Thank you. -Get on it. 65 00:04:35,900 --> 00:04:38,695 -Hi. -Hey, beautiful. 66 00:04:40,196 --> 00:04:42,824 So I'm so glad that you got out of work to be here. 67 00:04:43,157 --> 00:04:47,912 You think I wouldn't take off work? And miss this? Are you crazy? 68 00:04:48,079 --> 00:04:49,831 Look at you, beautiful. 69 00:04:49,998 --> 00:04:52,875 -You are glowing. My God. -Thank you. 70 00:04:54,168 --> 00:04:56,045 It feels like it was just yesterday... 71 00:04:56,546 --> 00:04:59,549 ...sitting in this same restaurant, when I asked you to marry me. 72 00:05:00,383 --> 00:05:03,219 I'm still working on that diamond. I didn't forget the diamond. 73 00:05:03,386 --> 00:05:07,056 I know, baby. You are the sweetest, most supportive man on the planet. 74 00:05:08,766 --> 00:05:09,809 Can I talk now? 75 00:05:09,976 --> 00:05:11,936 -I'm sorry. Go ahead. -Okay. 76 00:05:12,103 --> 00:05:14,856 So you know what I've been waiting all week to find out. 77 00:05:15,023 --> 00:05:16,733 Yes. Yep. 78 00:05:16,899 --> 00:05:19,068 -Well, I got the news... -Yeah. 79 00:05:19,235 --> 00:05:22,739 -...and I'm-- -Pregnant. Yes! Yes! 80 00:05:23,239 --> 00:05:25,825 -Having my baby -Oh, no. 81 00:05:25,992 --> 00:05:27,827 -Is so important to me -No. No, no. 82 00:05:27,994 --> 00:05:29,912 -Darryl. Darryl. -Baby. 83 00:05:30,079 --> 00:05:33,249 -There's nothing more speciaI -Darryl-- No, honey, I'm not pregnant. 84 00:05:33,416 --> 00:05:35,251 -I'm not pregnant. -Than to raise a famiIy 85 00:05:35,418 --> 00:05:37,879 -Excuse me, sir. Sir. Sir. -I thought that you-- 86 00:05:38,046 --> 00:05:39,172 -Hey. -And-- 87 00:05:39,339 --> 00:05:40,798 -Sir. -Jimmy. 88 00:05:41,424 --> 00:05:43,343 -And-- -Sir! 89 00:05:43,926 --> 00:05:46,012 No. Stop. No. 90 00:05:47,096 --> 00:05:48,348 I'm not pregnant. 91 00:05:49,390 --> 00:05:51,434 -No? -No. 92 00:05:56,731 --> 00:05:57,732 You're not pregnant? 93 00:05:57,899 --> 00:06:00,777 Baby, but you was nauseous and throwing up all over the place. 94 00:06:00,943 --> 00:06:02,278 Well, I was very nervous. 95 00:06:03,029 --> 00:06:04,697 Baby, what are we doing here? 96 00:06:05,782 --> 00:06:07,033 Darryl... 97 00:06:07,200 --> 00:06:08,993 ...I got the promotion. 98 00:06:09,160 --> 00:06:12,622 And we're movin' on up To the east side 99 00:06:12,789 --> 00:06:14,040 Jimmy. 100 00:06:14,207 --> 00:06:16,667 They'II be movin' on up To that apartment in the sky 101 00:06:16,834 --> 00:06:20,755 -I'm gonna hurt him. -Hey. Hey, Jimmy. Jimmy, stop. 102 00:06:20,922 --> 00:06:23,132 -Man-- Man, you ain't got to do this. -Hey.... 103 00:06:23,633 --> 00:06:25,635 -Okay, then. All right. -Beat it. 104 00:06:28,096 --> 00:06:30,306 Congratulations. I'm really proud of you. 105 00:06:32,892 --> 00:06:34,310 But? 106 00:06:35,144 --> 00:06:37,313 But I thought we was gonna start a family. 107 00:06:38,689 --> 00:06:40,608 We will, baby. 108 00:06:41,067 --> 00:06:44,320 You know, with this promotion, everything's on track now. 109 00:06:44,487 --> 00:06:48,491 In a couple of years I'll be senior V.P., and I can take time off to have a child. 110 00:06:48,658 --> 00:06:50,660 A couple of years? I don't wanna wait years. 111 00:06:50,827 --> 00:06:53,162 Darryl, you know, having a baby changes everything. 112 00:06:53,579 --> 00:06:55,373 Hey, I'm willing to do whatever it takes. 113 00:06:55,540 --> 00:06:57,667 So no more late-night poker with the guys. 114 00:06:58,418 --> 00:06:59,419 Cool. 115 00:07:00,044 --> 00:07:01,337 No more... 116 00:07:01,504 --> 00:07:03,256 ...afternoon quickies. 117 00:07:03,423 --> 00:07:05,925 Stop right there. We haven't had a afternoon quickie... 118 00:07:06,092 --> 00:07:07,427 ...since your father moved in. 119 00:07:07,593 --> 00:07:11,180 That is not fair. My dad is getting old. Sometimes he forgets things. 120 00:07:11,347 --> 00:07:13,683 I don't feel comfortable with him living by himself. 121 00:07:13,850 --> 00:07:15,101 What about Whispering Glen? 122 00:07:15,268 --> 00:07:17,854 That place looked like a country club inside the brochure. 123 00:07:18,020 --> 00:07:19,939 They got Viagra vending machines. 124 00:07:20,106 --> 00:07:21,107 You listen to me. 125 00:07:21,274 --> 00:07:24,861 Until he is a danger to himself or others, he is staying with us. 126 00:07:26,696 --> 00:07:27,864 Now... 127 00:07:28,030 --> 00:07:29,699 ...can we celebrate? 128 00:07:29,866 --> 00:07:34,871 Celebration, come on We gonna ceIebrate tonight 129 00:07:35,037 --> 00:07:38,291 Come on, come on, let's celebrate Let's not have a fight 130 00:07:38,458 --> 00:07:40,626 And I'm not taIking tonight 131 00:07:40,793 --> 00:07:42,712 Remix! Now just you Iadies 132 00:07:43,421 --> 00:07:47,884 Celebrate, celebrate Celebrate, celebrate 133 00:08:00,646 --> 00:08:02,899 Hey, oblivious. What are you doing? 134 00:08:03,065 --> 00:08:05,193 Getting ready to rob a jewelry store, Calvin. 135 00:08:05,359 --> 00:08:06,861 I'm going straight Jesse James. 136 00:08:07,028 --> 00:08:10,239 Percy, put the gun away. Guns is how you wind up back in prison. 137 00:08:10,406 --> 00:08:14,076 I'm telling you, I ain't going back to jail. You understand? 138 00:08:14,243 --> 00:08:15,912 Now put the gun away. 139 00:08:16,370 --> 00:08:17,914 Why you gotta keep hitting me, Cal? 140 00:08:18,080 --> 00:08:20,750 Sometimes I gotta slap some sense into you, Percy. 141 00:08:20,917 --> 00:08:22,001 Come on. Give me a hand. 142 00:08:26,214 --> 00:08:27,673 Now, would you trust the big man? 143 00:08:29,091 --> 00:08:30,593 I got a plan, yo. 144 00:08:31,260 --> 00:08:36,432 Now, this stone is a 3-karat, G-color diamond. 145 00:08:36,599 --> 00:08:40,394 -VVS2, nearly flawless. -It's been a pleasure, sir. 146 00:08:40,770 --> 00:08:42,355 Just be cool, Cal. I'm telling you. 147 00:08:42,647 --> 00:08:44,815 Oh, there she go. There's-- 148 00:08:44,982 --> 00:08:46,442 Go ahead. Do your thing, Cal. 149 00:08:57,161 --> 00:08:59,622 Pardon me for just a moment. 150 00:09:01,791 --> 00:09:04,043 -Do your thing. -Yes? May I help you? 151 00:09:05,711 --> 00:09:09,423 Percy. CEO and A&R of P-Unit Records. 152 00:09:09,590 --> 00:09:11,592 Here to pick up jewelry for one of my artists. 153 00:09:12,051 --> 00:09:14,095 Well, holler at your girl. 154 00:09:15,471 --> 00:09:16,806 Step this way, Percy P. 155 00:09:16,973 --> 00:09:18,975 I like the way you said my name just now. 156 00:09:19,141 --> 00:09:20,726 Can I sit down? She's sitting down. 157 00:09:20,893 --> 00:09:23,229 Of course you may. Would you like some gin and juice? 158 00:09:41,664 --> 00:09:44,166 Well, I'm gonna show you some shiznit right about now. 159 00:09:47,503 --> 00:09:51,090 Yes. Come to daddy. 160 00:10:03,060 --> 00:10:05,313 Now that's what I'm talking about, baby. 161 00:10:05,479 --> 00:10:07,607 So, what can I get for you today, Percy P.? 162 00:10:09,525 --> 00:10:11,485 All of the above. 163 00:10:15,364 --> 00:10:17,783 I'll send one of my assistants from P-Unit Records... 164 00:10:17,950 --> 00:10:19,201 ...to pick everything up. 165 00:10:19,368 --> 00:10:23,372 Just tell him to pull up to my bumper, and I'll throw that junk in his trunk. 166 00:10:24,040 --> 00:10:25,207 Word? 167 00:10:26,375 --> 00:10:28,419 Let me get up out of here. I gotta bounce. 168 00:10:28,586 --> 00:10:31,047 I got some people meeting me down there, and I gotta.... 169 00:10:31,380 --> 00:10:33,466 So I'm gonna leave, you know? 170 00:10:33,883 --> 00:10:37,136 -Okay? See you later, all right? Peace. -Peace. 171 00:10:38,929 --> 00:10:40,473 Be cool. What's going on in there? 172 00:10:40,640 --> 00:10:42,308 Has anyone seen my dog? 173 00:10:43,934 --> 00:10:44,977 Hi, puppy. 174 00:10:50,399 --> 00:10:51,901 He stole my dog. 175 00:10:54,320 --> 00:10:55,321 Holy crap. 176 00:10:56,197 --> 00:10:58,074 The Queen's diamond. It's gone. 177 00:10:58,240 --> 00:11:01,035 Relax. We almost there, man. We about to be paid, man. 178 00:11:01,202 --> 00:11:03,996 I need the police. Yes, there's been a robbery. 179 00:11:06,332 --> 00:11:09,418 We did it. Modern-day Butch Cassidy and Sundance. 180 00:11:09,585 --> 00:11:11,754 Come back here with my dog. 181 00:11:12,380 --> 00:11:14,924 -Get out of here, mutt. -You just tossed a Chihuahua. 182 00:11:15,091 --> 00:11:17,927 -Come on, let's get out of here. -Gotcha that. We are gone. 183 00:11:18,094 --> 00:11:19,428 Come on, Percy. 184 00:11:22,181 --> 00:11:24,725 -Oh, man. -This ain't time to be doing doughnuts. 185 00:11:28,104 --> 00:11:29,397 I can't believe this, man. 186 00:11:29,730 --> 00:11:31,273 Damn it, Percy. 187 00:11:31,440 --> 00:11:34,360 You got a boot on the car, and you about to get one in your butt. 188 00:11:34,527 --> 00:11:36,445 -She finally got me. -Who? 189 00:11:36,612 --> 00:11:39,532 Nettie, down at Motor Vehicles. Said I got her pregnant. 190 00:11:39,699 --> 00:11:42,118 I went to family court. I had all my receipts. 191 00:11:43,119 --> 00:11:44,245 I'm out. 192 00:11:45,287 --> 00:11:47,957 -Hey, yo, Percy. You forgot something. -What? 193 00:11:48,124 --> 00:11:49,959 Me! 194 00:11:50,876 --> 00:11:53,879 -Come on! -Sorry, Cal. 195 00:12:01,929 --> 00:12:03,848 -They went that way. -What'd he look like? 196 00:12:04,014 --> 00:12:05,599 -Black. -I got him. 197 00:12:05,766 --> 00:12:07,893 -Dark or light? -Medium. 198 00:12:08,060 --> 00:12:10,563 Suspect is escaping on foot. African-American male. 199 00:12:10,730 --> 00:12:13,566 About 5'1 0", not real dark, more of a mocha-caramel color. 200 00:12:23,617 --> 00:12:25,161 What? You shot? 201 00:12:25,369 --> 00:12:28,289 Sweet bejesus. My muscle, I think I pulled it. 202 00:12:28,456 --> 00:12:30,249 Quick. In here. 203 00:12:33,085 --> 00:12:35,129 Yo, quick, put me down. We gotta split up. 204 00:12:35,296 --> 00:12:36,839 Okay. 205 00:12:45,181 --> 00:12:48,434 It's late because of the stress, not because I'm pregnant. 206 00:12:48,601 --> 00:12:52,104 Please, don't even say words like "stress." It's not good for the baby. 207 00:12:52,605 --> 00:12:54,815 Darryl, there is no baby. 208 00:12:54,982 --> 00:12:57,109 -Aisle two. -Well, why didn't you just say that? 209 00:13:08,704 --> 00:13:12,082 -Okay, let's go. -Okay, fine. Just humor me, okay? 210 00:13:12,249 --> 00:13:13,959 -Okay, let's go. -Okay. 211 00:13:17,880 --> 00:13:21,842 -Enough. -Okay, okay. 212 00:13:28,182 --> 00:13:29,809 I got one! 213 00:13:35,231 --> 00:13:38,234 -Come on, man. -Do not resist. Do not resist. 214 00:13:38,400 --> 00:13:40,319 -I'm not resisting. -Wilson. Wilson. Wilson. 215 00:13:40,486 --> 00:13:41,904 Come on. It's not our guy. 216 00:13:42,071 --> 00:13:44,323 What? You said African-American. 217 00:13:44,615 --> 00:13:46,909 Yeah, but I said a mocha-caramel color. 218 00:13:47,076 --> 00:13:49,745 He's like a Starbucks black decaf, maybe a little cream. 219 00:13:50,246 --> 00:13:52,498 -It's not our guy. Sorry about that. -Come on, man. 220 00:13:52,665 --> 00:13:55,334 -You sure? -Yeah. He's okay. 221 00:13:58,254 --> 00:14:00,381 -Wilson! -Well, he looked mocha to me. 222 00:14:02,716 --> 00:14:05,511 -Thank you. -What? 223 00:14:07,680 --> 00:14:10,933 He looked real shady. He gonna do something else, and I'll be waiting. 224 00:14:12,726 --> 00:14:14,270 -You still got the diamond? -No. 225 00:14:14,436 --> 00:14:16,272 -I had to ditch it. -Where? 226 00:14:17,773 --> 00:14:19,358 In her bag. 227 00:14:19,525 --> 00:14:20,943 Calvin, now what? 228 00:14:21,110 --> 00:14:22,194 We go get it. 229 00:14:25,114 --> 00:14:26,949 Let's go. Come on. 230 00:14:34,456 --> 00:14:36,375 Follow that car. 231 00:14:58,397 --> 00:14:59,607 Yo, there they are. 232 00:14:59,773 --> 00:15:00,983 -There is no baby. -There is. 233 00:15:01,150 --> 00:15:03,652 -Honey, there is no baby. -Well, there will be. 234 00:15:04,653 --> 00:15:06,155 Let's go. 235 00:15:11,619 --> 00:15:12,828 Daddy, we're home. 236 00:15:13,162 --> 00:15:16,749 -There's my baby girl. -Hi, Daddy. 237 00:15:18,667 --> 00:15:20,753 Who's the best daddy in the whole, wide world? 238 00:15:20,920 --> 00:15:23,297 -I am. -I know you can do better than that. 239 00:15:23,464 --> 00:15:25,674 Who's the best daddy in the whole, wide world? 240 00:15:25,841 --> 00:15:28,636 -I am. -I can't hear you. 241 00:15:28,802 --> 00:15:30,971 I'm the best daddy in the whole, wide world! 242 00:15:44,026 --> 00:15:45,444 So, what's the good news? 243 00:15:45,611 --> 00:15:47,029 Dad... 244 00:15:47,196 --> 00:15:48,656 ...I got the promotion. 245 00:15:49,281 --> 00:15:53,327 Congratulations. Soon you'll make enough money to leave that bum. 246 00:15:53,494 --> 00:15:55,204 Oh, Dad, he's not a bum. 247 00:15:55,371 --> 00:15:58,040 No? What kind of man gives the woman he loves... 248 00:15:58,207 --> 00:15:59,833 ...a wedding ring with no diamond? 249 00:16:00,000 --> 00:16:03,170 Hey, as soon as I make enough money, I'm gonna buy her a diamond. 250 00:16:03,337 --> 00:16:05,714 And I'm going to do the nasty with Jennifer Lopez... 251 00:16:05,881 --> 00:16:08,801 ...while Halle Berry tickle my butt. 252 00:16:09,885 --> 00:16:12,554 You know, for a moment I thought you were gonna tell me... 253 00:16:12,721 --> 00:16:14,807 ...you were gonna let this one impregnate you. 254 00:16:14,974 --> 00:16:17,726 But I see now, this man ain't got no bullets in the chamber. 255 00:16:17,893 --> 00:16:19,353 What's that supposed to mean? 256 00:16:19,520 --> 00:16:21,480 You heard me. You're shooting blanks. 257 00:16:21,647 --> 00:16:24,316 -Cooking with a wet noodle. -What? 258 00:16:24,483 --> 00:16:26,318 Can't hoist the mainsaiI 259 00:16:26,485 --> 00:16:29,905 My sperm have fallen and it can't get up. 260 00:16:30,072 --> 00:16:32,074 I'll have you know, I hit that every night. 261 00:16:32,241 --> 00:16:34,076 Hey, that's my daughter you talking about. 262 00:16:34,243 --> 00:16:36,996 -Back up, old man. -Okay, okay. Stop. Stop. Please. 263 00:16:37,162 --> 00:16:38,205 Gentlemen. 264 00:16:38,372 --> 00:16:43,293 Dad, we are going to have a baby when the time is right. 265 00:16:44,086 --> 00:16:46,296 Play nice. 266 00:16:53,637 --> 00:16:54,847 It's still in the bag. 267 00:16:55,931 --> 00:16:58,809 Still in the bag. Let's go get the rock. 268 00:16:58,976 --> 00:17:02,563 Yo, Percy, how many times I gotta tell you? No guns. 269 00:17:02,730 --> 00:17:03,731 What we gonna do? 270 00:17:03,897 --> 00:17:06,859 Walken is gonna kill us if we don't give him the diamond. 271 00:17:07,026 --> 00:17:09,069 Then I guess we gotta find a way to sneak in. 272 00:17:13,282 --> 00:17:16,035 Well, they did say they wanted a baby. 273 00:17:16,952 --> 00:17:19,329 No. No. 274 00:17:19,496 --> 00:17:22,249 No. I ain't dressing up like no baby. 275 00:17:23,292 --> 00:17:26,128 Keep still, Cal. You heavy. You gonna make me drop you. 276 00:17:26,295 --> 00:17:28,797 You drop me and I'm gonna drop you. 277 00:17:28,964 --> 00:17:30,632 Now, look, you stay close. 278 00:17:30,799 --> 00:17:33,427 I'm gonna go in, I'm gonna get the diamond, and I'm out. 279 00:17:33,594 --> 00:17:37,890 If you don't mind me saying, Cal, you make a cute little baby. 280 00:17:38,057 --> 00:17:39,141 I'm out. 281 00:17:39,308 --> 00:17:41,560 You couldn't find nothing better than a dog basket? 282 00:17:41,727 --> 00:17:45,147 You just be cool. I told you, this gonna be great, Cal. 283 00:17:49,151 --> 00:17:50,986 Just hold tight. Everything gonna be fine. 284 00:17:51,153 --> 00:17:53,322 I'm gonna be over here in the bushes. 285 00:18:02,206 --> 00:18:03,499 Move, dog. 286 00:18:03,665 --> 00:18:05,667 Get out of here. I'll make a coat out of you. 287 00:18:05,834 --> 00:18:08,170 Get out of here before I feed you some chocolate. 288 00:18:08,837 --> 00:18:11,340 Get out of here, you fleabag. 289 00:18:11,507 --> 00:18:13,175 -Go. -Get out of here. 290 00:18:13,342 --> 00:18:15,344 Wait, hold-- Wait. Muttley, wait. No, no. 291 00:18:31,193 --> 00:18:32,611 Honey. 292 00:18:32,778 --> 00:18:34,530 -Yeah? -Come here. 293 00:18:34,863 --> 00:18:36,698 -What is it, Darryl? -Look. 294 00:18:39,618 --> 00:18:41,370 Oh, my God. 295 00:18:41,537 --> 00:18:43,038 It's a baby. 296 00:18:44,998 --> 00:18:47,042 I know. And here's a note too. 297 00:18:47,376 --> 00:18:49,545 "Plez luk tafter Kalvin. 298 00:18:49,711 --> 00:18:53,215 We wuzn't abele to keap em." 299 00:18:53,382 --> 00:18:55,342 Poor guy. His parents must've been retarded. 300 00:18:56,218 --> 00:18:57,803 Well, let's get him inside. 301 00:18:57,970 --> 00:19:00,347 -It's cold out here. -Okay, okay. All right. 302 00:19:00,514 --> 00:19:01,723 Come on, little guy. 303 00:19:01,890 --> 00:19:03,725 -Yes. -I got you. 304 00:19:06,562 --> 00:19:08,147 Oh, damn. 305 00:19:08,689 --> 00:19:10,816 -What in the hell is that? -I don't know. 306 00:19:12,234 --> 00:19:13,652 Man. 307 00:19:14,069 --> 00:19:16,321 Dad, we found a baby on the doorstep. 308 00:19:16,488 --> 00:19:19,199 -What? What is it? A boy or girl? -Dada. 309 00:19:19,449 --> 00:19:20,826 I think it's a boy. 310 00:19:20,993 --> 00:19:23,162 Well, whatever it is, it smell like piss. 311 00:19:24,288 --> 00:19:26,999 Yeah. I think Janet may have left diapers here. Let's look. 312 00:19:27,166 --> 00:19:29,251 Doesn't your dad have some diapers upstairs? 313 00:19:29,418 --> 00:19:32,004 I heard that. I don't wear diapers. Who you talking about? 314 00:19:32,588 --> 00:19:34,089 Haven't worn a diaper in years. 315 00:19:34,256 --> 00:19:36,258 I think she put them in here. 316 00:19:43,640 --> 00:19:45,225 What is it? 317 00:19:47,102 --> 00:19:49,271 That ain't no baby. That's a porn star. 318 00:19:50,063 --> 00:19:53,025 What on girth is that? 319 00:19:53,859 --> 00:19:56,236 I'm gonna call Child Services. 320 00:19:56,403 --> 00:19:57,446 -Yeah. -Yeah. Do that. 321 00:20:03,869 --> 00:20:04,953 Directory assistance. 322 00:20:05,120 --> 00:20:07,956 Yes, can I have the number for Child Services, please? 323 00:20:08,123 --> 00:20:09,791 Connecting you. 324 00:20:10,626 --> 00:20:13,295 ChiId Services is now cIosed for the weekend. 325 00:20:13,462 --> 00:20:17,007 We wiII re-open at 9 a.m. Monday morning. 326 00:20:21,136 --> 00:20:22,554 They're closed for the weekend. 327 00:20:22,721 --> 00:20:25,474 The office doesn't open until 9:00 on Monday morning. 328 00:20:26,308 --> 00:20:27,434 So, what do we do now? 329 00:20:27,851 --> 00:20:31,230 I say, toss this creature back in the Black Lagoon where it came from. 330 00:20:31,396 --> 00:20:32,564 Daddy, stop it. 331 00:20:33,315 --> 00:20:35,484 Maybe we should call the police. 332 00:20:46,995 --> 00:20:50,332 -That doesn't sound good. -No, we should take him to the doctor. 333 00:20:50,499 --> 00:20:53,335 Get him checked out. Who knows what he's been through? 334 00:20:53,502 --> 00:20:54,962 -Okay? -I'll go get the car keys. 335 00:20:55,128 --> 00:20:56,129 -All right. -Okay. 336 00:20:56,964 --> 00:20:59,841 Now, when you get to the hospital, don't stop. Don't stop. 337 00:21:00,008 --> 00:21:02,469 Toss that monster out the window and keep moving. 338 00:21:02,636 --> 00:21:05,681 Hit the accelerator. I don't wanna see that little ugly thing again. 339 00:21:07,140 --> 00:21:09,184 Stinky little thing. 340 00:21:09,935 --> 00:21:11,353 Was it a little cough? 341 00:21:11,520 --> 00:21:12,521 -No. -No. 342 00:21:12,688 --> 00:21:16,149 No, this was like a grown-man, smoker's cough. 343 00:21:17,025 --> 00:21:19,319 Well, it's probably nothing. 344 00:21:19,486 --> 00:21:21,989 Come on, let's get his shirt off. 345 00:21:24,366 --> 00:21:27,494 He's a strong little fella. 346 00:21:31,540 --> 00:21:34,167 Oh, my God. What is that scar? 347 00:21:34,751 --> 00:21:36,295 From the look of it, I'd say... 348 00:21:36,461 --> 00:21:38,880 ...this little guy has had his appendix removed. 349 00:21:39,047 --> 00:21:40,882 Or he was in one hell of a knife fight. 350 00:21:44,303 --> 00:21:45,929 What kind of person tattoos a child? 351 00:21:46,096 --> 00:21:47,597 Oh, you'd be amazed. Come on. 352 00:21:48,598 --> 00:21:50,726 Open up. Open up and say: 353 00:21:50,892 --> 00:21:52,728 Come on. Come on. Come on. 354 00:21:57,065 --> 00:21:59,735 -Wha--? What is it? -I've never seen a... 355 00:21:59,901 --> 00:22:01,153 ...baby with bridgework. 356 00:22:02,237 --> 00:22:05,407 This child has the mouth of a 40-year-old man. 357 00:22:05,866 --> 00:22:10,287 I can't tell whether these teeth are coming in or falling out. 358 00:22:10,454 --> 00:22:12,080 Well, he's gonna be okay? 359 00:22:12,539 --> 00:22:13,832 He's fine. 360 00:22:13,999 --> 00:22:18,295 His tonsils are a little swollen and he might have a bit of a cold. 361 00:22:18,462 --> 00:22:19,463 As a precaution... 362 00:22:19,629 --> 00:22:22,424 ...you should take his temperature before you put him to bed. 363 00:22:22,591 --> 00:22:24,551 -All right. Thank you, Dr. Murphy. -Okay. 364 00:22:24,718 --> 00:22:27,262 -Thank you very much. -Bye. 365 00:22:28,096 --> 00:22:30,599 This is just-- It's horrible. Look at this child. 366 00:22:30,766 --> 00:22:32,642 Let's turn him over to the authorities. 367 00:22:32,809 --> 00:22:34,936 They can find his parents and prosecute them. 368 00:22:35,103 --> 00:22:36,605 Are you crazy? We can't do that. 369 00:22:36,772 --> 00:22:38,523 This kid's been through the wringer. 370 00:22:38,690 --> 00:22:41,026 Besides, his birth parents are probably crackheads. 371 00:22:41,193 --> 00:22:43,111 They're just gonna put them in rehab. 372 00:22:43,278 --> 00:22:46,281 Then they'll be back on the street, selling him for a bag of rocks. 373 00:22:46,948 --> 00:22:49,159 What are you saying? 374 00:22:49,326 --> 00:22:51,578 I'm saying, why don't we just keep him? 375 00:22:51,953 --> 00:22:53,705 -Just until Monday. -No. No, Darryl. 376 00:22:53,872 --> 00:22:55,082 -Just until-- -He's a child. 377 00:22:55,248 --> 00:22:57,793 -I don't know what to do with a child. -Just until Monday. 378 00:22:57,959 --> 00:22:59,836 And then we'll take him to Child Services. 379 00:23:00,003 --> 00:23:02,172 They'll find a home for him. 380 00:23:02,339 --> 00:23:05,425 Besides, who could take better care of this child than us? 381 00:23:08,387 --> 00:23:11,640 -Where is he? -Oh, man. 382 00:23:17,479 --> 00:23:19,815 Where do you think you're going? 383 00:23:20,774 --> 00:23:22,025 Well, what do we got here? 384 00:23:23,485 --> 00:23:25,237 -Is this your baby? -Yes, thank you. 385 00:23:26,279 --> 00:23:28,657 Well, actually... 386 00:23:28,824 --> 00:23:31,493 -...we found him-- -Mama. 387 00:23:36,623 --> 00:23:38,250 He called me Mama. 388 00:23:39,668 --> 00:23:40,669 There you go. 389 00:23:43,922 --> 00:23:46,591 Thank you, officer. Thank you. 390 00:23:47,843 --> 00:23:50,679 You know, Percy, I don't like having to look for people. 391 00:23:52,097 --> 00:23:54,141 Who, me? I wasn't hiding, Mr. W. 392 00:23:54,307 --> 00:23:55,642 Not Percy. Not the Kid. 393 00:23:55,809 --> 00:23:57,769 I was gonna come soon as I got the diamond. 394 00:23:58,186 --> 00:23:59,688 So you don't have my diamond, huh? 395 00:23:59,855 --> 00:24:01,314 No. I mean, I do. 396 00:24:01,481 --> 00:24:03,358 I don't have it on me now, but it's safe. 397 00:24:03,525 --> 00:24:06,611 We got everything on lockdown. Believe me. Trust me. 398 00:24:06,778 --> 00:24:09,030 You trying to hustle me, Percy? 399 00:24:09,531 --> 00:24:12,534 Hustle a hustler? Ain't nothing happening, Mr. W. 400 00:24:12,909 --> 00:24:15,745 It's just that the robbery didn't go as smooth as we wanted to. 401 00:24:15,912 --> 00:24:19,082 And a situation had popped up, so we had to split. 402 00:24:19,249 --> 00:24:22,335 -But my partner, he-- -Your partner is not my problem. 403 00:24:22,502 --> 00:24:24,963 My problem is I don't have my diamond. 404 00:24:25,380 --> 00:24:27,382 Now, I'm gonna give you 24 hours. 405 00:24:27,549 --> 00:24:30,802 After that, my problem becomes Bruno and Rosco's problem. 406 00:24:32,053 --> 00:24:33,388 And they... 407 00:24:33,555 --> 00:24:35,140 ...become your problem. 408 00:24:35,307 --> 00:24:36,683 You got a problem with that? 409 00:24:37,058 --> 00:24:39,269 Ain't got no problem with that, Mr. W. 410 00:24:39,436 --> 00:24:41,354 I got it all under control, I swear. 411 00:24:41,521 --> 00:24:43,690 Don't want a smudge on it, not a speck, nothing. 412 00:24:43,857 --> 00:24:45,901 Not a smudge. 413 00:24:46,318 --> 00:24:47,569 Okay, Mr. W. 414 00:24:48,570 --> 00:24:49,988 Get him out of here. 415 00:24:50,155 --> 00:24:52,115 -Get him out of here. -Come on. 416 00:24:58,246 --> 00:25:00,248 Ain't nothing better than the evening news... 417 00:25:00,415 --> 00:25:02,959 ...and my favorite, milk and cookies. 418 00:25:03,710 --> 00:25:05,879 Damn, I forgot my milk. 419 00:25:06,046 --> 00:25:08,256 Jeez, man, you can't be popping up like that. 420 00:25:08,757 --> 00:25:10,509 For a moment I thought you were Chucky. 421 00:25:11,051 --> 00:25:12,719 About to put you in a chokehold. 422 00:25:14,721 --> 00:25:16,306 What are you looking at? 423 00:25:17,224 --> 00:25:21,019 A man who exposed himseIf to poIice officers in a doughnut shop... 424 00:25:21,186 --> 00:25:23,563 ...cIaimed that voices made him do it. 425 00:25:23,730 --> 00:25:26,608 Oh, honey, look how comfortable he is with us. 426 00:25:26,775 --> 00:25:28,777 He is so cute. 427 00:25:28,944 --> 00:25:30,529 Oh, no, you don't. 428 00:25:30,695 --> 00:25:33,532 No, you don't. No, no, no. 429 00:25:33,698 --> 00:25:35,575 -Dad. -Come on, Pop, let him sit there. 430 00:25:35,742 --> 00:25:39,120 -Let him have a cookie. -This is my throne, my sanctuary. 431 00:25:39,287 --> 00:25:41,289 This is my air, my end zone. 432 00:25:41,456 --> 00:25:44,543 -It's just a cookie. -Oh, it start with the cookie. 433 00:25:46,962 --> 00:25:50,966 Then they want to come to dinner. Then they want to move in. 434 00:25:51,550 --> 00:25:55,303 Next thing you know, they're married to your daughter. 435 00:25:55,887 --> 00:25:59,307 -Why he got to bring it back here-- -Already made that mistake once. 436 00:25:59,474 --> 00:26:00,725 -Come on, now. -Honey. 437 00:26:00,892 --> 00:26:02,769 No more, my brother. 438 00:26:02,936 --> 00:26:06,147 Nobody makes a fool out of me. I'm from Detroit. 439 00:26:08,108 --> 00:26:09,651 -Everybody's here. -I can't wait... 440 00:26:09,818 --> 00:26:11,778 ...for everybody to meet little Calvin. 441 00:26:12,571 --> 00:26:14,155 -I'm so excited. -Yeah, yeah. 442 00:26:14,322 --> 00:26:17,951 Introduce him to everybody else, and go over to somebody else's house. 443 00:26:21,997 --> 00:26:23,582 Cookie got a little bite to it. 444 00:26:24,541 --> 00:26:27,002 -Hi. Come in, come in, come in. -Hello, hello, hello. 445 00:26:27,168 --> 00:26:30,797 -Hello, hello. -I'm so excited. 446 00:26:30,964 --> 00:26:32,173 -Hey. -Hello. 447 00:26:32,340 --> 00:26:36,386 -Consuela, welcome. Come in. -So where is the little one? 448 00:26:37,345 --> 00:26:42,350 -Here's Calvin. -Here's Calvin. 449 00:26:45,437 --> 00:26:47,856 -What a mess. -Honey, that's not nice. 450 00:26:48,023 --> 00:26:49,983 He's scary. 451 00:26:50,817 --> 00:26:52,861 Yeah, well, I mean.... 452 00:26:53,862 --> 00:26:58,783 -I mean, lucky he's not yours, right? -Yeah. 453 00:27:00,452 --> 00:27:03,622 I just think he is precious. I think he is a precious gift from God. 454 00:27:04,205 --> 00:27:05,540 You know, God gives gifts. 455 00:27:05,707 --> 00:27:10,128 Sometimes he wraps them in a hurry. Sometimes. Isn't he a precious gift? 456 00:27:10,712 --> 00:27:13,632 Oh, yeah. He's adorable... 457 00:27:14,215 --> 00:27:17,052 ...in a NationaI Geographic sort of way. 458 00:27:18,720 --> 00:27:20,513 What is he, a pygmy? 459 00:27:24,976 --> 00:27:27,228 Consuela, why don't you take the kids to go play? 460 00:27:27,395 --> 00:27:28,688 Yes, good idea. Come on, guys. 461 00:27:28,855 --> 00:27:31,483 Tommy, show Nicholas that scissor-lock thing... 462 00:27:31,650 --> 00:27:33,151 ...we've been working on, huh? 463 00:27:35,278 --> 00:27:38,948 Hey, little man. No hard feelings, right? 464 00:27:41,993 --> 00:27:43,328 Give me five. 465 00:27:50,001 --> 00:27:52,379 Hey, guess what, Calvin? We brought you some stuff. 466 00:27:52,545 --> 00:27:55,090 We got you some stuff. We got a box full of bottles, bibs. 467 00:27:55,256 --> 00:27:58,468 Oh, and all of the Dinosaurus Rex tapes you could possibly want. 468 00:27:58,635 --> 00:28:00,428 Well, thank you. That's a lot of stuff. 469 00:28:00,595 --> 00:28:04,599 He is so cute. I got your nose. 470 00:28:04,766 --> 00:28:07,936 Yes, I do. Yes, I do. 471 00:28:10,271 --> 00:28:11,898 Oh, you got my nose. 472 00:28:12,065 --> 00:28:15,276 You got my nose. Yes, you do. 473 00:28:16,611 --> 00:28:19,406 He's got my nose. He's got my nose. He's hurting-- 474 00:28:19,572 --> 00:28:20,949 Darryl, he's hurting me. 475 00:28:21,116 --> 00:28:23,618 -He's hurting me. -Okay, okay, okay. 476 00:28:23,785 --> 00:28:25,620 Wow, is he strong. 477 00:28:26,246 --> 00:28:28,707 Yeah, tell me about it. I still can't feel my hand. 478 00:28:28,873 --> 00:28:31,334 Okay, Darryl, I think you should take the crib upstairs. 479 00:28:31,501 --> 00:28:33,795 -Yes. -Ladies, will you help with this stuff? 480 00:28:33,962 --> 00:28:35,213 Okay. 481 00:28:35,380 --> 00:28:37,465 -Guys, help me grab this. -I'll get this box. 482 00:28:37,632 --> 00:28:39,801 Let's go into the kitchen. Come, Calvin. 483 00:28:39,968 --> 00:28:42,846 -Come on, baby. -Come on, little pumpkin-butt. 484 00:28:44,013 --> 00:28:46,141 Janet, this fits perfectly. 485 00:28:46,641 --> 00:28:48,017 -Thank you. -Let me see. 486 00:28:48,768 --> 00:28:50,562 I'm glad I kept it. 487 00:28:51,146 --> 00:28:53,940 Can't remember the last time I could wear horizontal stripes. 488 00:28:54,899 --> 00:28:57,819 But, you know, here I go again. How about you, woman of the hour? 489 00:28:57,986 --> 00:29:00,822 -Congratulations on the promotion. -Oh, thank you. 490 00:29:00,989 --> 00:29:03,324 It's awesome. Was Darryl so excited or what? 491 00:29:03,491 --> 00:29:07,662 No, actually. He was disappointed. 492 00:29:07,829 --> 00:29:10,081 Baby up-up. 493 00:29:12,500 --> 00:29:15,503 He thought I was going to tell him I was pregnant. 494 00:29:20,175 --> 00:29:22,177 Okay, right. 495 00:29:22,343 --> 00:29:24,095 Little Ms. Corporate-Climber pregnant? 496 00:29:24,262 --> 00:29:29,559 What? You guys. I want to have a baby at some point. 497 00:29:29,726 --> 00:29:33,438 You could schedule one between a conference call and a client meeting. 498 00:29:34,856 --> 00:29:38,526 Okay, you know, Darryl is the one that I'm really worried about. 499 00:29:38,693 --> 00:29:41,112 Are you kidding me? You're lucky he wants one at all. 500 00:29:41,279 --> 00:29:43,198 I had to promise Greg I'd give him these. 501 00:29:45,283 --> 00:29:48,703 Okay, now. Okay, easy, fella. 502 00:29:50,997 --> 00:29:55,376 This one's real grabby. He must have been breast-fed. 503 00:29:55,960 --> 00:29:57,837 Is the baby hungry? 504 00:29:58,296 --> 00:29:59,380 He should be nursed. 505 00:29:59,547 --> 00:30:01,549 Baby like nursey-nursey. 506 00:30:02,175 --> 00:30:04,469 Well, are you sure you should do that? 507 00:30:04,636 --> 00:30:07,263 Yeah. You don't have to be the birth mother to breast-feed. 508 00:30:08,056 --> 00:30:11,559 -Nursey-nursey? -You want to nursey? 509 00:30:13,978 --> 00:30:15,396 Okay. 510 00:30:19,484 --> 00:30:20,860 All right. 511 00:30:21,569 --> 00:30:25,323 -Drink up, precious. -This one's real wriggly, huh? 512 00:30:25,490 --> 00:30:28,576 Come on. Come on, now. Suck it. 513 00:30:28,743 --> 00:30:33,540 Latch-- Oh, that is not okay. 514 00:30:35,416 --> 00:30:36,709 Let's get these kids home. 515 00:30:36,876 --> 00:30:39,587 I have to take Nicholas and Chrissy to Mommy and Me tomorrow. 516 00:30:39,754 --> 00:30:41,047 Oh, have fun. 517 00:30:41,214 --> 00:30:44,300 Don't worry about the nose. He's adorable. 518 00:30:44,467 --> 00:30:47,303 -Thanks for all the stuff. -Call if you need anything. 519 00:30:47,470 --> 00:30:48,930 -Bye, good night. -Good night. 520 00:30:49,097 --> 00:30:51,850 If you change your mind about Consuela, you can take her. 521 00:30:52,016 --> 00:30:54,102 -Oh, thanks. -I've got, like, all the chores. 522 00:30:54,269 --> 00:30:55,937 One for you... 523 00:30:57,272 --> 00:30:59,274 ...and one for the baby. 524 00:31:17,876 --> 00:31:19,669 He's a little charmer, isn't he? 525 00:31:19,878 --> 00:31:22,130 Call me. 526 00:31:24,299 --> 00:31:26,801 I could have sworn he just stuck his tongue in my mouth. 527 00:31:34,976 --> 00:31:37,312 -Well, I-- That was-- I thought-- -That went well. 528 00:31:37,478 --> 00:31:39,647 -Yeah. -I thought they thought he was cute. 529 00:31:39,814 --> 00:31:42,358 Great. You're wonder-- Oh, Calvin, you did so good. 530 00:31:42,525 --> 00:31:44,611 -Come on. Yeah. -You did so well. 531 00:31:44,777 --> 00:31:47,697 If that lady touches you in a way that makes you uncomfortable... 532 00:31:47,864 --> 00:31:49,365 ...you let us know, okay? 533 00:31:49,532 --> 00:31:51,117 -Yeah. You're the charmer. -Yeah. 534 00:31:51,993 --> 00:31:56,164 Does that warm water feel good? Does it feel nice? 535 00:31:56,331 --> 00:31:58,499 Yeah. Look at you. 536 00:31:58,666 --> 00:32:02,337 Do you want some company in there with you? 537 00:32:02,503 --> 00:32:03,796 I think we can work that out. 538 00:32:04,339 --> 00:32:07,050 Yeah? Yeah? 539 00:32:07,216 --> 00:32:08,593 Hey, Darryl? 540 00:32:08,760 --> 00:32:11,846 Hello. It's bath time. 541 00:32:14,641 --> 00:32:16,684 Come on, let's get clean. 542 00:32:17,644 --> 00:32:20,563 We gonna clean your little butt-butt. Yes, we are. 543 00:32:20,730 --> 00:32:22,565 And then we gonna play Snatch the Marbles. 544 00:32:22,732 --> 00:32:24,192 We're gonna fart in the tub... 545 00:32:24,359 --> 00:32:27,487 ...and make our own little Jacuzzi bubbles. 546 00:32:32,659 --> 00:32:36,037 Oh, the little baby. Yes, you're so clean now. 547 00:32:36,204 --> 00:32:37,664 You're so nice and clean. 548 00:32:42,418 --> 00:32:45,296 Hey. Okay-- Calvin. 549 00:32:45,463 --> 00:32:47,715 Okay, Calvin. 550 00:32:48,925 --> 00:32:50,385 Okay. Hey, Darryl? 551 00:32:50,551 --> 00:32:53,721 -All right, sweetie. -Hello, little boy. 552 00:32:53,888 --> 00:32:55,556 Hi, cutie. 553 00:32:55,723 --> 00:32:57,934 Now it's time to get you all dressed for bed, huh? 554 00:32:58,101 --> 00:33:00,895 Don't forget the doctor said we need to take his temperature. 555 00:33:01,062 --> 00:33:02,605 Okay. 556 00:33:02,814 --> 00:33:04,065 -Yeah. -All right. 557 00:33:04,232 --> 00:33:05,692 Open up wide. 558 00:33:05,858 --> 00:33:08,736 -Darryl, what are you doing? -I'm taking his temperature. 559 00:33:08,903 --> 00:33:12,407 Sweetie, he's a baby, so that's a rectal thermometer. 560 00:33:13,950 --> 00:33:15,243 Yeah. Go ahead. 561 00:33:15,410 --> 00:33:16,661 -You're such a-- -Okay, baby. 562 00:33:16,828 --> 00:33:18,871 All right. Here we go. There we-- 563 00:33:20,081 --> 00:33:21,833 -Oh, shit. -Darryl, what are you doing? 564 00:33:22,208 --> 00:33:24,919 Darryl, come on. Darryl, just-- 565 00:33:25,086 --> 00:33:27,380 -I'm trying to-- -Honey. 566 00:33:27,547 --> 00:33:29,424 It's okay, Calvin. It's okay. 567 00:33:29,590 --> 00:33:31,884 -If he'll just roll over here. -Okay, good, good. 568 00:33:32,051 --> 00:33:33,761 -I could get him down like-- -No, no. 569 00:33:33,928 --> 00:33:37,265 -Wait, be gentle. Calvin, it's okay. -He's a little strong. 570 00:33:37,432 --> 00:33:40,601 Okay, all right. Nobody likes this, I know. 571 00:33:40,768 --> 00:33:43,271 I know, nobody-- Nobody likes this. 572 00:33:43,438 --> 00:33:47,442 It's okay. It's okay. Oh, yeah. There we go, son. 573 00:33:47,608 --> 00:33:51,320 -Here comes the choo-choo train. -You're okay, baby. Oh, yeah. 574 00:33:57,035 --> 00:34:01,539 It's in the tunnel, son. It's almost at your stop. 575 00:34:06,169 --> 00:34:08,337 There you go, little man. 576 00:34:08,713 --> 00:34:12,508 Now, this is gonna put you to sleep. 577 00:34:13,468 --> 00:34:15,094 All right, little buddy. 578 00:34:21,559 --> 00:34:23,311 Good night, baby. 579 00:34:29,901 --> 00:34:32,820 Like this thing's gonna put somebody to sleep. 580 00:34:33,446 --> 00:34:35,406 I'm gonna wait for you to go to sleep. 581 00:34:35,573 --> 00:34:38,034 I'm gonna get my diamond and be out. 582 00:36:07,999 --> 00:36:12,003 Come on, baby, be in here. Come on. 583 00:36:13,588 --> 00:36:14,881 Come on. 584 00:36:15,047 --> 00:36:17,091 Come on, where you at? Where you at? 585 00:36:17,258 --> 00:36:18,843 There we go. 586 00:36:20,303 --> 00:36:24,724 Hi, beautiful. Yes. 587 00:36:40,281 --> 00:36:42,950 Man, this idiot better pick up the phone. 588 00:36:57,506 --> 00:36:59,926 People calling here all kind of time. 589 00:37:00,092 --> 00:37:03,930 Like people don't live here. I mean, you can't be calling nobody house.... 590 00:37:04,722 --> 00:37:08,809 P-Unit Productions, in association with Go Get a Girl Entertainment. 591 00:37:08,976 --> 00:37:11,312 -Hey, yo, Percy. It's me. -CaIvin? 592 00:37:11,479 --> 00:37:14,440 -What's going on? -I need you to come pick me up. 593 00:37:14,607 --> 00:37:17,485 -Now, look, I got the dia-- -Reach for the sky. 594 00:37:18,986 --> 00:37:20,655 Who you talking to, sonny boy? 595 00:37:25,826 --> 00:37:28,496 Oh, don't give me that old...crap. 596 00:37:28,663 --> 00:37:29,997 Hand me that damn phone. 597 00:37:31,290 --> 00:37:33,042 -Who is this? -Me no speak no English. 598 00:37:33,209 --> 00:37:34,502 Wrong number. Sorry. 599 00:37:34,669 --> 00:37:37,338 Who the hell's "No speak the English"? Who the hell is this? 600 00:37:37,505 --> 00:37:39,257 -Say something. -What are you doing? 601 00:37:39,423 --> 00:37:41,717 I heard some noises, came downstairs... 602 00:37:41,884 --> 00:37:43,970 ...and caught this little hoodlum on the phone. 603 00:37:44,136 --> 00:37:46,681 -Must've looked for the safe. -We don't have a safe. 604 00:37:46,847 --> 00:37:49,600 -He didn't know that. -Dada. 605 00:37:50,601 --> 00:37:54,522 Pop, man. He's a baby. 606 00:37:54,689 --> 00:37:57,525 It's his first night in a new house. Probably couldn't sleep. 607 00:37:57,692 --> 00:38:01,779 Look at you. You look crazy, man. Holding a shotgun, wearing red socks. 608 00:38:01,946 --> 00:38:05,074 You look like Fred Sanford on crack. Put that away, man. Go to bed. 609 00:38:05,241 --> 00:38:07,493 Oh, you are good. 610 00:38:07,660 --> 00:38:09,537 You are real good. 611 00:38:09,704 --> 00:38:11,872 I'm gonna keep my eye on you. 612 00:38:12,331 --> 00:38:13,874 You gonna give me the finger? 613 00:38:14,041 --> 00:38:17,503 Where did you learn that, huh? BET videos After Dark? 614 00:38:20,381 --> 00:38:21,632 Him scary. 615 00:38:21,799 --> 00:38:23,509 There we go. 616 00:38:23,676 --> 00:38:26,846 Don't pay him any mind. He just a old, crazy man. 617 00:38:27,013 --> 00:38:30,558 I know just what to fix you so you can have a good night's sleep. 618 00:38:44,613 --> 00:38:47,575 Go. Boy, you must have had a rough first night. 619 00:38:49,035 --> 00:38:51,078 That's because I'm new at this dad stuff. 620 00:38:51,245 --> 00:38:53,914 Give me a minute, I'll get it together. 621 00:38:57,668 --> 00:39:01,088 Man, can't imagine what kind of life you must have had. 622 00:39:01,922 --> 00:39:03,132 I'll tell you this: 623 00:39:03,299 --> 00:39:05,885 This weekend is gonna be the best weekend of your life. 624 00:39:06,052 --> 00:39:07,261 You know why? 625 00:39:07,428 --> 00:39:10,348 Because I'm gonna show you how great it is to have a dad... 626 00:39:10,514 --> 00:39:14,226 ...and you're gonna show me how great it is to be a dad. 627 00:39:15,311 --> 00:39:18,272 Vanessa don't think I can do it, but I know I got it in me. 628 00:39:18,439 --> 00:39:21,275 You know why? Because I would never abandon my child. 629 00:39:22,902 --> 00:39:26,113 Ever. I'll always be there for him. 630 00:39:26,489 --> 00:39:29,492 And there'll never be a time when my son can't come to me... 631 00:39:29,658 --> 00:39:32,036 ...and talk to me about anything in the world... 632 00:39:32,203 --> 00:39:36,123 ...over a nice, warm cup of milk. 633 00:39:45,800 --> 00:39:48,469 What's so funny? What are you all giggly for? 634 00:39:49,220 --> 00:39:51,263 You're drinking Janet's breast milk. 635 00:39:54,392 --> 00:39:58,771 Baby, you did the right thing, letting him stay with us this weekend. 636 00:39:59,230 --> 00:40:01,065 Thank you. 637 00:40:02,650 --> 00:40:07,488 But you know, I still can't wait for us to have one of our own. 638 00:40:08,906 --> 00:40:12,576 -Yes, I know. -All right. 639 00:40:13,661 --> 00:40:16,455 You wanna know the nice thing about you not being pregnant? 640 00:40:16,956 --> 00:40:18,499 What? 641 00:40:18,749 --> 00:40:20,835 We get to keep trying. 642 00:40:31,137 --> 00:40:34,181 Honey? What about the baby? 643 00:40:34,348 --> 00:40:37,184 He's asleep, don't worry about him. You've got me. 644 00:40:37,351 --> 00:40:39,145 But, honey... 645 00:40:41,105 --> 00:40:42,857 ...he's watching. 646 00:40:45,818 --> 00:40:48,946 He's too young to know what's going on. Forget him. 647 00:40:52,533 --> 00:40:53,909 Okay. 648 00:40:55,286 --> 00:40:56,996 Okay. 649 00:41:11,510 --> 00:41:13,053 Good morning. 650 00:41:14,763 --> 00:41:17,683 More like, great morning. 651 00:41:17,850 --> 00:41:21,228 Looks like someone had a really good night's sleep last night. 652 00:41:22,229 --> 00:41:23,856 Who could sleep? 653 00:41:24,023 --> 00:41:27,193 -You were an animal last night. -Oh, well, you know-- 654 00:41:27,359 --> 00:41:31,155 I don't remember the last time we did it twice in one night. 655 00:41:31,322 --> 00:41:32,781 Twice? 656 00:41:35,409 --> 00:41:36,869 Hey, when did he get in the bed? 657 00:41:38,579 --> 00:41:41,916 I don't know. I don't know how he gets out of that crib. 658 00:41:42,082 --> 00:41:43,751 He's such a crafty little fella. 659 00:41:47,838 --> 00:41:50,007 You want some breakfast? 660 00:41:50,174 --> 00:41:51,592 Some more ass. 661 00:41:54,136 --> 00:41:55,513 Twice? 662 00:42:14,114 --> 00:42:17,243 -How's my baby girl this morning? -So good, Dad. 663 00:42:17,409 --> 00:42:19,787 -How are you? -Mighty fine, thank you. 664 00:42:19,954 --> 00:42:21,455 No, no, no. 665 00:42:21,622 --> 00:42:23,958 Thanks very much, Jim. And in other news... 666 00:42:24,124 --> 00:42:27,086 ...poIice have a suspect in yesterday's daring diamond heist. 667 00:42:27,253 --> 00:42:29,922 It is this man, CaIvin "Baby Face" Sims... 668 00:42:30,089 --> 00:42:32,299 -...who was reIeased-- -D. Rex, D. Rex, D. Rex. 669 00:42:32,466 --> 00:42:34,301 Stop that, whatever you're talking about. 670 00:42:34,468 --> 00:42:37,263 D. Rex, D. Rex, D. Rex. 671 00:42:37,429 --> 00:42:38,639 Just be quiet. 672 00:42:39,014 --> 00:42:40,641 -D. Rex. -Baby Face-- 673 00:42:40,933 --> 00:42:43,978 Dad, let Calvin watch his show. 674 00:42:44,353 --> 00:42:47,773 You have to be the adult. Let Calvin watch his tape. 675 00:42:47,940 --> 00:42:50,818 -I wanna watch the news. -I don't care what you wanna watch. 676 00:42:50,985 --> 00:42:53,612 He was watching the TV first. 677 00:42:53,779 --> 00:42:55,239 I'll read the news. 678 00:42:55,406 --> 00:42:59,827 I tell you, the world is going to hell in a handcart. 679 00:43:36,071 --> 00:43:39,033 Wow, Dad, you really cleaned your plate. 680 00:43:39,199 --> 00:43:41,493 What? That hobgoblin ate my breakfast. 681 00:43:42,536 --> 00:43:44,538 Oh, Daddy, don't be ridiculous. 682 00:43:44,705 --> 00:43:47,875 I ain't being ridiculous. That little sucker ate my breakfast. 683 00:43:48,042 --> 00:43:51,545 I'm going to the diner, where I can eat and watch the news in peace. 684 00:43:51,837 --> 00:43:55,341 Okay, Dad. Be careful. 685 00:43:55,507 --> 00:43:59,345 Why don't we get you some food? You must be so hungry. 686 00:43:59,511 --> 00:44:01,972 It's time for you to eat something. 687 00:44:03,015 --> 00:44:05,517 -Morning, sweetie. -Oh, good morning, baby. 688 00:44:05,684 --> 00:44:06,977 Hello. 689 00:44:07,144 --> 00:44:10,147 -I have your breakfast right here. -Oh, goodie. 690 00:44:11,732 --> 00:44:15,402 Oh, sweetie, okay, now your dad is really tripping. 691 00:44:15,861 --> 00:44:19,365 Last night, I caught him holding little Calvin at gunpoint... 692 00:44:19,531 --> 00:44:22,034 ...because he heard him talking on the phone. 693 00:44:22,284 --> 00:44:24,078 That is-- That's crazy. 694 00:44:24,411 --> 00:44:27,039 Well, you know... 695 00:44:27,206 --> 00:44:32,252 ...just now he ate all of his breakfast, and then he told me the baby ate it. 696 00:44:33,420 --> 00:44:36,340 -Can you say, "Whispering Glen"? -No, Darryl. 697 00:44:36,507 --> 00:44:37,925 No nursing homes, okay? 698 00:44:38,092 --> 00:44:40,511 I don't wanna have this conversation with you again. 699 00:44:40,678 --> 00:44:43,389 I have to go to work, but the baby's food is here. 700 00:44:43,555 --> 00:44:45,683 -And I love you. -I love you too. 701 00:44:45,849 --> 00:44:49,228 Have a good day. Kiss. Feed him. 702 00:44:50,229 --> 00:44:51,939 All right. 703 00:44:54,191 --> 00:44:57,486 Okay, okay, let's get you all fed. 704 00:44:57,653 --> 00:45:02,783 All right. Open up wide. Here come the airplane. 705 00:45:08,789 --> 00:45:10,582 Oh, I see. 706 00:45:10,749 --> 00:45:12,918 You want to play a game of peekaboo, huh? 707 00:45:13,085 --> 00:45:15,087 Okay, okay, okay. 708 00:45:15,254 --> 00:45:16,880 Peekaboo, I see you. 709 00:45:20,134 --> 00:45:22,386 Peekaboo, I see you. 710 00:45:38,318 --> 00:45:41,488 You gotta be kidding me. God. 711 00:45:48,662 --> 00:45:50,247 Darryl? 712 00:45:51,498 --> 00:45:53,167 Where did I put it? 713 00:45:59,673 --> 00:46:01,842 Honey, I forgot my purse. 714 00:46:02,760 --> 00:46:04,762 Darryl. Darryl. 715 00:46:05,179 --> 00:46:08,515 Sweetheart. You can't just fall asleep like this. 716 00:46:09,016 --> 00:46:12,770 Oh, honey, I know that you're tired, but you have to watch the baby. 717 00:46:12,936 --> 00:46:16,023 You take your eyes off him for a minute, God knows what could happen. 718 00:46:16,190 --> 00:46:17,691 I was.... 719 00:46:18,609 --> 00:46:21,111 -Darryl. -I was.... 720 00:46:21,278 --> 00:46:23,155 -What...? -I don't-- 721 00:46:23,322 --> 00:46:27,201 Honey, just take him to the park or something, okay? 722 00:46:27,618 --> 00:46:28,952 Okay. 723 00:46:30,537 --> 00:46:31,872 What...? 724 00:46:39,546 --> 00:46:42,841 Peekaboo. Then I don't-- What? 725 00:46:48,013 --> 00:46:50,641 We gonna play baseball. We gonna play football. 726 00:46:50,808 --> 00:46:53,727 And we're gonna play golf. 727 00:46:54,061 --> 00:46:56,939 And we're gonna shoot a plane. 728 00:46:57,105 --> 00:46:59,566 We're gonna have fun. 729 00:47:03,278 --> 00:47:04,947 There we go. 730 00:47:05,113 --> 00:47:08,575 All right, son. Now, don't be afraid to really swing that bat, okay? 731 00:47:08,742 --> 00:47:11,995 Now, the trick is to really keep your eye on the ball, okay? 732 00:47:12,162 --> 00:47:13,705 Here we go. 733 00:47:18,919 --> 00:47:21,547 Yeah, you want that sucker to really fly. 734 00:47:21,713 --> 00:47:23,841 You wanna give that thing a lot of air, okay? 735 00:47:24,007 --> 00:47:25,717 There you go. Give it some good pump. 736 00:47:25,884 --> 00:47:28,428 You want it to really fly. You want it to blast off. 737 00:47:28,595 --> 00:47:32,099 Yeah, there you go. No, no, no. You want to point that up. 738 00:47:32,266 --> 00:47:35,561 No. No, no, son. What are you--? No, no, no. Don't push that button. 739 00:47:38,856 --> 00:47:42,067 Okay, so now, what you wanna do is you wanna wind that baby up... 740 00:47:42,234 --> 00:47:44,278 ...and you throw it as hard as you can, okay? 741 00:47:44,444 --> 00:47:46,029 -Okay. -All right. Come on. 742 00:47:50,033 --> 00:47:52,452 Look at that. Yeah. 743 00:47:53,495 --> 00:47:56,290 Yeah. Look at that sucker. 744 00:47:58,792 --> 00:48:00,127 Where'd it go? 745 00:48:10,095 --> 00:48:11,889 The ducks teach you playfulness. 746 00:48:12,055 --> 00:48:14,766 Here, you can borrow this if you want. He'd love it. 747 00:48:14,933 --> 00:48:16,977 Hey, Dad-For-A-Weekend. 748 00:48:17,603 --> 00:48:18,812 How's it going? 749 00:48:18,979 --> 00:48:21,940 I think they designed all the toys to hit you in the nuts. 750 00:48:22,482 --> 00:48:23,901 Oh, yeah. 751 00:48:24,735 --> 00:48:25,736 Get off. 752 00:48:25,903 --> 00:48:29,072 Richard, I bet my son could kick the crap out of both your kids... 753 00:48:29,239 --> 00:48:31,909 ...blindfolded, one hand tied behind his back. 754 00:48:32,075 --> 00:48:35,537 Come on, Greg. Nicholas is a sweet, sensitive kid. 755 00:48:35,704 --> 00:48:37,748 He's not a fighter. 756 00:48:37,915 --> 00:48:40,959 I'm telling you, Darryl, see, you gotta be tough on kids nowadays. 757 00:48:41,126 --> 00:48:44,588 All right, the slightest bit of weakness and they could end up... 758 00:48:47,007 --> 00:48:48,467 ...like that. 759 00:48:48,634 --> 00:48:51,553 Well, I don't know about all that, but I gotta be honest with you. 760 00:48:51,720 --> 00:48:54,806 I'm starting to dig this father thing. It's kind of cool. 761 00:48:54,973 --> 00:48:58,685 It's kind of like I get to do all the things that I never did with my dad. 762 00:48:58,852 --> 00:49:00,687 -You know? -That's real cute. 763 00:49:01,229 --> 00:49:04,441 Really, I think I'm having a positive influence on him. 764 00:49:05,943 --> 00:49:08,362 Cee-lo, that's right. Dig up in your OshKosh... 765 00:49:08,528 --> 00:49:09,988 ...your babyGap and pay the man. 766 00:49:10,155 --> 00:49:13,367 -That's right. Yeah. -It's not fair. 767 00:49:13,533 --> 00:49:15,202 Come on, put your money in the pot. 768 00:49:15,369 --> 00:49:17,120 Whine to your mama, don't whine to me. 769 00:49:17,287 --> 00:49:18,622 Right, good game, good game. 770 00:49:18,789 --> 00:49:20,290 Come here, you guys. Come here. 771 00:49:21,833 --> 00:49:24,002 Yo, y'all bring your money tomorrow... 772 00:49:24,169 --> 00:49:27,047 ...I'm gonna sell y'all some pictures of some naked girls. 773 00:49:28,715 --> 00:49:31,385 What I say? Y'all don't like big breasts? 774 00:49:31,551 --> 00:49:33,178 Daddy, can I have some ice cream? 775 00:49:33,345 --> 00:49:34,721 Sure, sweetie. What flavor? 776 00:49:34,888 --> 00:49:36,515 -Vanilla. -You got it. 777 00:49:36,682 --> 00:49:38,141 -I think we'll go with you. -Okay. 778 00:49:39,393 --> 00:49:41,395 -You're getting big. -Janet, do me a favor? 779 00:49:42,562 --> 00:49:44,898 -Could you watch Calvin for me? -No problem. 780 00:49:45,983 --> 00:49:47,401 Calvin. 781 00:49:47,567 --> 00:49:48,860 Percy. 782 00:49:49,820 --> 00:49:53,240 -Cal, you get the diamond? -Yeah, it's in the diaper bag. Come on. 783 00:49:53,407 --> 00:49:54,574 Hold hands. 784 00:49:54,741 --> 00:49:57,285 Cal, which one is it? 785 00:49:57,744 --> 00:49:59,496 The one with the duck on it. 786 00:50:01,289 --> 00:50:04,918 -They all got ducks on them. -I think it's that one. 787 00:50:05,419 --> 00:50:07,087 Come on. 788 00:50:07,879 --> 00:50:09,923 Hey, that guy's not even here with a child. 789 00:50:10,090 --> 00:50:11,550 Hey. 790 00:50:12,884 --> 00:50:15,387 Hey, get away from him. Girls, let's get him! 791 00:50:15,554 --> 00:50:18,056 -I'm out. -There he is. 792 00:50:19,599 --> 00:50:21,852 Pumpkin, are you okay? 793 00:50:22,269 --> 00:50:23,937 -Did he touch you anywhere? -No. 794 00:50:24,104 --> 00:50:26,273 No? Okay. Good. 795 00:50:26,440 --> 00:50:28,608 -Hey, is everything okay, Janet? -It's not okay. 796 00:50:28,775 --> 00:50:31,445 Some sick pervert tried to run away with this little guy. 797 00:50:31,611 --> 00:50:33,572 Hey, that psycho took my diaper bag. 798 00:50:33,739 --> 00:50:35,782 -What? -Damn. 799 00:50:36,950 --> 00:50:38,618 Pervert. 800 00:50:40,120 --> 00:50:43,915 Okay, we gonna get you home where it's nice and safe, all right? 801 00:50:47,627 --> 00:50:50,297 Keys, keys. I want the keys. 802 00:50:50,547 --> 00:50:54,801 Keys, keys, I want keys. Keys. Keys. Keys. 803 00:50:54,968 --> 00:50:57,137 No, no, no. Daddy needs these to drive the-- 804 00:50:57,304 --> 00:50:58,805 -Keys. -Oh, God. 805 00:50:58,972 --> 00:51:00,724 Keys. Give me the keys. 806 00:51:01,308 --> 00:51:03,894 -Oh, no. Here. Take that. -No. Keys. 807 00:51:04,061 --> 00:51:05,979 -I want keys. -Play with that for a while. 808 00:51:06,146 --> 00:51:08,482 -No, no, no. I need these. -I want keys. 809 00:51:09,316 --> 00:51:10,734 -Want keys. -Okay, here. 810 00:51:11,318 --> 00:51:13,945 -Keys. -All right, all right. 811 00:51:14,112 --> 00:51:18,033 All right, you wait right there, and I'll be right back, okay? 812 00:51:23,580 --> 00:51:25,248 Hey! 813 00:51:25,415 --> 00:51:26,833 My car. My kid. 814 00:51:28,168 --> 00:51:30,837 Hey, stop! 815 00:51:36,885 --> 00:51:38,929 Someone just stole my car with my kid in it. 816 00:51:39,096 --> 00:51:40,347 Hop in. 817 00:51:41,431 --> 00:51:43,809 -Thank you. -Let's go get that son of a bitch. 818 00:51:54,194 --> 00:51:55,654 Damn. 819 00:52:07,707 --> 00:52:10,377 Man, my wife is gonna kill me when she finds out about this. 820 00:52:10,544 --> 00:52:12,379 My advice to you is don't tell her a word. 821 00:52:12,546 --> 00:52:14,381 I left Bobby Jr. at an amusement park. 822 00:52:14,548 --> 00:52:17,050 Told his father he was at summer camp. Bought me a week. 823 00:52:22,222 --> 00:52:25,267 Hello? I'm on my way. I'll be there in about five minutes. 824 00:52:25,433 --> 00:52:27,894 I have the cupcakes. Yes. 825 00:52:28,061 --> 00:52:29,896 I didn't bring juice. You didn't tell me. 826 00:52:30,063 --> 00:52:32,649 -Don't talk to me that way. -Excuse me. 827 00:52:33,275 --> 00:52:34,901 -I'm hanging up. -Oh, my God. 828 00:52:35,068 --> 00:52:36,903 I'm hanging up. I'm hanging up. 829 00:52:38,572 --> 00:52:40,657 Watch the road, moron. 830 00:52:41,408 --> 00:52:43,743 Come on, baby. Let's go. Let's do this. 831 00:52:51,710 --> 00:52:55,088 Oh, wow, you are really upset. 832 00:52:55,255 --> 00:52:58,925 It makes me feel so good to know that there are people out there who care... 833 00:52:59,092 --> 00:53:01,219 -Mommy, Mommy.... -...about their kids-- What? 834 00:53:01,386 --> 00:53:02,387 --as I do. 835 00:53:02,554 --> 00:53:04,472 -Mommy, Mommy. -Just one second, honey. 836 00:53:04,639 --> 00:53:07,684 I'm fixing my makeup. 837 00:53:07,851 --> 00:53:10,020 -Mom. -What? 838 00:53:10,187 --> 00:53:12,439 I think Dillon did a doodie. 839 00:53:12,606 --> 00:53:15,275 -Mom, hurry up. Come on, hurry. -Change him. 840 00:53:15,442 --> 00:53:18,403 Oh, wait, no. Wait. 841 00:53:19,863 --> 00:53:22,574 Oh, my God. Excuse me. A truck. 842 00:53:22,782 --> 00:53:25,118 Excuse me. A truck. 843 00:53:25,285 --> 00:53:27,245 There you go. Can you hand me the powder? 844 00:53:27,412 --> 00:53:28,914 What? No, stop. 845 00:53:29,956 --> 00:53:31,541 We're gonna die. 846 00:53:38,381 --> 00:53:40,425 Oh, my God. 847 00:53:40,592 --> 00:53:42,802 Don't worry. You'll get your little boy back. 848 00:53:42,969 --> 00:53:45,805 It ain't worth it. Let me out. 849 00:53:52,312 --> 00:53:53,605 Oh, no. 850 00:54:09,746 --> 00:54:12,832 -Suspect got away. -Damn it! 851 00:54:13,750 --> 00:54:18,255 -But the kid's okay. -I want my daddy. 852 00:54:19,631 --> 00:54:23,843 I want Daddy. I want my daddy. 853 00:54:24,010 --> 00:54:25,887 Thanks for everything. 854 00:54:27,597 --> 00:54:29,683 Oh, by the way, I run a carpool... 855 00:54:29,849 --> 00:54:32,852 ...if the little one ever needs a ride to preschool. 856 00:54:33,103 --> 00:54:34,854 -Daddy. -That's my kid. 857 00:54:35,146 --> 00:54:37,357 Daddy. Daddy. 858 00:54:37,524 --> 00:54:40,944 -Are you okay, huh? -Daddy. 859 00:54:41,236 --> 00:54:45,532 -Son's okay, but car's totaled. -Screw the car. Long as he's okay. 860 00:54:45,699 --> 00:54:48,618 I'm sorry, man. I'm sorry, little buddy. 861 00:54:48,785 --> 00:54:51,371 I would never want anything to happen to you. 862 00:54:51,538 --> 00:54:53,415 I love you, man. 863 00:54:56,209 --> 00:54:57,794 -Mr. W. -Yeah. 864 00:54:57,961 --> 00:55:00,880 Your boy came through. I got it. 865 00:55:03,216 --> 00:55:05,719 Bring it to me. Watch my drink, babe. 866 00:55:21,067 --> 00:55:25,071 Keep looking. Keep digging in there. It's in there. It's in there, baby. 867 00:55:26,072 --> 00:55:27,907 Look around in there. 868 00:55:28,950 --> 00:55:31,703 Mr. Dub, could you dig deeper in there? 869 00:55:31,870 --> 00:55:33,163 Damn. 870 00:55:35,290 --> 00:55:37,083 Is that a dirty diaper? 871 00:55:38,335 --> 00:55:41,713 -Did I just touch a dirty diaper? -Wait a minute. 872 00:55:41,880 --> 00:55:44,132 Whoa, that baby had lasagna last night. 873 00:55:44,299 --> 00:55:46,760 I know it's in here. The diamond's in here. 874 00:55:46,926 --> 00:55:50,680 -He said the diamond's in there. -Your 24 hours are up, Percy. 875 00:55:55,310 --> 00:55:57,354 And you haven't delivered my diamond. 876 00:55:57,520 --> 00:55:59,689 Do you know how that makes me feel? 877 00:56:00,940 --> 00:56:04,277 Please, Mr. Dub, give me a little more time. I promise I'll get the rock. 878 00:56:04,444 --> 00:56:07,030 It makes me feel like wanting to hurt you very badly. 879 00:56:07,572 --> 00:56:09,366 But I won't. 880 00:56:09,949 --> 00:56:13,119 Because that diamond means more to me than your life. 881 00:56:13,453 --> 00:56:15,705 Now, you get out of here and find me that diamond. 882 00:56:18,750 --> 00:56:22,337 -Get out of here. -I promise you, okay? I got you. 883 00:56:23,671 --> 00:56:26,132 Follow him. Find his partner. 884 00:56:26,299 --> 00:56:29,803 Get me my diamond, then stick them both in the ground. 885 00:56:30,428 --> 00:56:32,555 Aren't you taking this a bit far? 886 00:56:32,722 --> 00:56:35,266 I didn't even know they made a LoJack for kids. 887 00:56:35,433 --> 00:56:39,062 No, I'm telling you, I'm not taking any chances. This guy's tricky. 888 00:56:39,229 --> 00:56:40,605 Maybe I should skip the game. 889 00:56:40,772 --> 00:56:44,818 Are you crazy? They're playing Detroit, D. 890 00:56:45,402 --> 00:56:49,280 Why don't we pack up the little ugly son of a bitch and take him with us? 891 00:56:52,283 --> 00:56:54,160 You really think that's the best idea? 892 00:56:54,327 --> 00:56:56,663 Yeah, Richard, I do think it's the best idea. 893 00:56:56,830 --> 00:56:59,165 It's never too early to become a Chicago fan. 894 00:57:01,084 --> 00:57:04,337 -You know what, I'm in. -Yeah. Come on, let's go. 895 00:57:04,504 --> 00:57:08,091 Okay, but when the ladies ask, I was the one that said no. 896 00:57:08,258 --> 00:57:09,509 I-- No. 897 00:57:15,849 --> 00:57:18,351 Are you ready to see how exciting a hockey game is? 898 00:57:18,518 --> 00:57:19,811 It's like boxing on ice. 899 00:57:19,978 --> 00:57:22,480 Five rows up behind the penalty box. Who the man? 900 00:57:22,647 --> 00:57:24,149 -Yeah, boy. Yeah. -That's right. 901 00:57:28,862 --> 00:57:31,614 Let's go. Come on. Come on. 902 00:57:32,282 --> 00:57:35,201 -Go, go, go. -Come on, what are you watching? 903 00:57:37,912 --> 00:57:39,706 Did you see that play? Hey. 904 00:57:39,873 --> 00:57:41,958 What you got in your mouth there, little fella? 905 00:57:42,667 --> 00:57:46,045 What you got in your mouth? Open up. Open. Let me see. 906 00:57:46,754 --> 00:57:48,715 Oh, okay, it was nothing. 907 00:57:48,882 --> 00:57:50,800 Come on. 908 00:57:53,094 --> 00:57:54,095 T Man! 909 00:57:54,262 --> 00:57:56,222 -Come on. -Here we go. 910 00:57:56,848 --> 00:57:58,099 Yeah. 911 00:58:00,727 --> 00:58:02,312 Yeah. 912 00:58:06,441 --> 00:58:09,068 -All right, who needs drinks? -I'm good. 913 00:58:09,235 --> 00:58:14,908 Oh, wait. Yeah, I guess I need another one, please. 914 00:58:16,659 --> 00:58:17,911 -Thanks. -Thanks. 915 00:58:18,119 --> 00:58:20,622 How about you guys? Anything to drink? 916 00:58:20,788 --> 00:58:23,583 -Yeah, I'll grab a beer, sure. -Me too, me too. Get me one. 917 00:58:24,250 --> 00:58:26,753 -There you go. -Thank you. 918 00:58:26,920 --> 00:58:30,465 -Okay. Here you go. -Nice ass. 919 00:58:33,259 --> 00:58:34,594 Pig. 920 00:58:35,762 --> 00:58:37,514 Tramp. 921 00:58:48,358 --> 00:58:51,778 What the hell was that for? 922 00:58:52,320 --> 00:58:54,197 -What did I do? -You know her? 923 00:58:54,364 --> 00:58:55,782 No, I don't know her. 924 00:58:57,075 --> 00:58:58,368 I don't know-- I don't. 925 00:58:58,535 --> 00:59:00,245 -Hey, man. Get your own. -Hey. 926 00:59:00,537 --> 00:59:02,121 -What? -Beer. It's empty. 927 00:59:02,288 --> 00:59:04,707 -So get another one. -I'm gonna-- 928 00:59:04,874 --> 00:59:06,960 -Get off. Wait. -What's your problem, man? 929 00:59:08,044 --> 00:59:10,380 -Come on, man. Come on, Miller. -Miller. 930 00:59:13,424 --> 00:59:15,385 You suck. 931 00:59:17,595 --> 00:59:20,807 -You suck, man. You suck. -Shut it, you losers! 932 00:59:20,974 --> 00:59:23,935 Want some of me? Come down here. Come play with the big boys. 933 00:59:24,102 --> 00:59:27,313 -You're a bully. You're a bully, man. -Yeah, I thought so, you princess. 934 00:59:27,480 --> 00:59:30,316 -Come on, you. -Pick on somebody your own size. 935 00:59:30,483 --> 00:59:32,485 Come on down here, then. 936 00:59:36,072 --> 00:59:37,782 Who did that? 937 00:59:40,451 --> 00:59:43,121 You. You're dead! 938 00:59:45,999 --> 00:59:47,500 He's gonna kill me. 939 00:59:48,668 --> 00:59:51,462 -Get out of my way. -It wasn't me. It was the baby. 940 00:59:51,629 --> 00:59:53,089 -You're mine. -Get him. 941 00:59:53,256 --> 00:59:54,674 Hockey fight! 942 01:00:01,014 --> 01:00:04,017 He's got my ear. Get this baby off of me. 943 01:00:08,521 --> 01:00:12,442 -Hey. Hey, hey. -Is that all you got? 944 01:00:16,571 --> 01:00:18,031 I don't know, baby. 945 01:00:18,197 --> 01:00:21,075 Maybe you're right. Maybe I'm not ready to be a dad yet. 946 01:00:21,242 --> 01:00:23,911 It really wasn't your fault. 947 01:00:24,203 --> 01:00:26,289 It's so funny, man. It just happened so fast. 948 01:00:26,456 --> 01:00:28,333 I took my eyes off him for one second and: 949 01:00:28,499 --> 01:00:30,543 He would've never had another birthday again. 950 01:00:32,879 --> 01:00:35,840 Hey. Why don't we do that? 951 01:00:36,007 --> 01:00:37,717 Why don't we throw him a birthday party? 952 01:00:37,884 --> 01:00:40,386 Well, we don't know when his birthday is. 953 01:00:40,553 --> 01:00:42,180 So what? We'll celebrate it tomorrow. 954 01:00:42,347 --> 01:00:45,892 We'll throw him a big birthday bash. The biggest birthday party he ever had. 955 01:00:46,059 --> 01:00:48,019 That is a really good idea. 956 01:00:48,394 --> 01:00:52,315 And I got a little surprise for him. 957 01:00:52,482 --> 01:00:54,567 Does everyone know what time it is? 958 01:00:54,734 --> 01:00:59,572 It's time to dance and sing, and have lots and lots of fun. 959 01:00:59,739 --> 01:01:02,408 Hey there, boys and girls, it's Dinosaur Rex... 960 01:01:02,575 --> 01:01:04,577 ...your favorite prehistoric pal. 961 01:01:04,744 --> 01:01:06,871 Now, where's the birthday boy? 962 01:01:07,038 --> 01:01:08,581 -There. -Yo, no, no. 963 01:01:08,790 --> 01:01:10,917 -Happy birthday. -Hey, yo. 964 01:01:11,084 --> 01:01:12,418 Happy birthday, IittIe buddy 965 01:01:12,585 --> 01:01:13,753 I got a nasty hangover... 966 01:01:13,920 --> 01:01:15,713 ...and a rock stuck in my gut... 967 01:01:15,880 --> 01:01:18,257 ...that got my colon backed up like rush-hour traffic. 968 01:01:18,424 --> 01:01:21,052 Now, either you're gonna stop with your fruity kid songs... 969 01:01:21,219 --> 01:01:23,596 ...or I'm gonna kick you right in your furry balls. 970 01:01:24,097 --> 01:01:26,057 -All right? -Well... 971 01:01:26,224 --> 01:01:28,434 ...maybe we should talk about manners. 972 01:01:28,601 --> 01:01:30,520 Now, manners are very important. 973 01:01:30,687 --> 01:01:34,607 When I was a tiny lizard, my mom told me that if I had good manners... 974 01:01:34,774 --> 01:01:39,445 ...one day I could grow up to be president of the whole United States. 975 01:01:39,612 --> 01:01:41,989 But instead, you entertain snotty-nosed kids... 976 01:01:42,156 --> 01:01:43,825 ...in a crusty, blue dinosaur suit... 977 01:01:43,991 --> 01:01:47,328 ...that smell like sweaty armpits and baby urine. 978 01:01:48,621 --> 01:01:50,081 Far cry from president, buddy. 979 01:01:54,085 --> 01:01:56,254 I just got out of rehab. 980 01:01:56,421 --> 01:01:58,589 Because of the new "deadbeat dad" law... 981 01:01:58,756 --> 01:02:02,719 ...my wife's garnishing 85 percent of my dinosaur wages. 982 01:02:02,885 --> 01:02:06,806 So if I weren't afraid to lose this job, I'd kick your ass. 983 01:02:06,973 --> 01:02:10,226 Oh, you so pathetic you need $4.50 an hour that bad? 984 01:02:10,393 --> 01:02:12,228 Come on, get your ass kicked. 985 01:02:16,232 --> 01:02:18,317 -Bring it on. -Come on. Come on, then. 986 01:02:19,402 --> 01:02:22,488 -Hey. -Oh, you mine now. You mine. 987 01:02:24,240 --> 01:02:26,617 Get him, get him, get him. 988 01:02:29,954 --> 01:02:31,622 You little bastard. 989 01:02:34,167 --> 01:02:36,502 That was a cheap shot. 990 01:02:38,504 --> 01:02:41,841 -You stink. -I hate your show. 991 01:02:42,008 --> 01:02:44,677 It has been confirmed, the driver of the stoIen vehicIe... 992 01:02:44,844 --> 01:02:48,389 ...matches the description of the suspect in Friday's diamond heist. 993 01:02:48,556 --> 01:02:50,933 -PoIice are Iooking to question... -I knew it. 994 01:02:51,100 --> 01:02:52,602 ...CaIvin "Baby Face" Sims. 995 01:02:52,769 --> 01:02:56,189 Sims, who was recentIy reIeased from state prison, has thus far eIuded-- 996 01:02:56,355 --> 01:02:58,524 Hey, guys, what do you say we liven this party up? 997 01:02:58,691 --> 01:03:00,526 We have a little father-son football game. 998 01:03:00,693 --> 01:03:03,696 Football? Greg, I don't know. I don't think that's a good idea. 999 01:03:03,863 --> 01:03:06,616 Nicholas is a little young and small for football. 1000 01:03:06,783 --> 01:03:09,327 How about Simon Says instead? 1001 01:03:09,535 --> 01:03:12,330 You know, Richard, your son practically squats to pee. 1002 01:03:12,872 --> 01:03:15,666 Come on, man. Look, we gotta scar these kids for life. 1003 01:03:15,833 --> 01:03:17,668 All right? We gotta toughen them up a bit. 1004 01:03:17,835 --> 01:03:19,212 You don't-- 1005 01:03:19,879 --> 01:03:20,880 -Come on. -Come on. 1006 01:03:21,047 --> 01:03:23,299 Darryl, you in, or does Calvin have ballet class? 1007 01:03:23,466 --> 01:03:24,550 I'm down. 1008 01:03:25,051 --> 01:03:26,719 -All right. -All right, let's do it. 1009 01:03:29,680 --> 01:03:32,642 Football? That's not in the books. I've read all the books. 1010 01:03:32,809 --> 01:03:35,353 Yeah, you're wetting yourself here. Go play football. 1011 01:03:35,520 --> 01:03:37,146 -You sure? -Rich, let's go. 1012 01:03:37,313 --> 01:03:40,983 -It's 7-0 already. -All right. I'm playing football. 1013 01:03:41,150 --> 01:03:43,236 Take off the sli-- Oh, my God. 1014 01:03:43,402 --> 01:03:45,613 Whoa, here we go. 1015 01:03:45,780 --> 01:03:48,908 P-U-T-I-T-I-N Put it in 1016 01:03:49,075 --> 01:03:52,245 P-U-T-I-T-I-N Put it in 1017 01:03:53,621 --> 01:03:57,250 You and me, this is father-son stuff. Right here, huh? Here we go. 1018 01:03:57,416 --> 01:04:00,878 -Ready, set.... -I love you, baby. 1019 01:04:01,045 --> 01:04:02,713 Hike. 1020 01:04:02,880 --> 01:04:04,924 One Victoria's Secret. Two-- 1021 01:04:06,092 --> 01:04:07,677 -Oh, God. -Yeah. 1022 01:04:07,844 --> 01:04:10,221 You want the hospital or the graveyard, punk? 1023 01:04:10,721 --> 01:04:11,889 Yeah. 1024 01:04:12,056 --> 01:04:13,850 -Here we go. -Are you okay? 1025 01:04:14,016 --> 01:04:16,853 -I thought this was a touch game. -You have his license number? 1026 01:04:17,019 --> 01:04:19,438 -What is he doing? -Sorry, D, did I hurt your vagina? 1027 01:04:19,605 --> 01:04:23,484 Our team is what? Dynamite Our team is what? Dynamite 1028 01:04:23,651 --> 01:04:25,444 -What's going on? -Our team is 1029 01:04:26,654 --> 01:04:27,697 Dynamite 1030 01:04:27,864 --> 01:04:29,031 Break. 1031 01:04:31,409 --> 01:04:33,202 Run, Dad. 1032 01:04:36,372 --> 01:04:38,040 Nicholas, are you okay? 1033 01:04:38,207 --> 01:04:40,084 Game on. 1034 01:04:40,293 --> 01:04:43,588 -Just stay down, son. -Thattaboy. You did it. 1035 01:04:44,171 --> 01:04:46,966 Now, that's why we put creatine in our corn flakes. 1036 01:04:47,592 --> 01:04:49,886 -You okay? -Punch him, kick him 1037 01:04:50,052 --> 01:04:52,471 Stick him in the eye 1038 01:04:53,973 --> 01:04:55,975 Here we go, here we go. 1039 01:04:56,142 --> 01:04:58,311 All right, here we go. Come on, boys. 1040 01:05:04,150 --> 01:05:07,278 -Yeah. -Your husband is a brute. 1041 01:05:07,445 --> 01:05:09,071 -That's right. -Yo, Greg, man. 1042 01:05:09,238 --> 01:05:10,907 You should be ashamed of yourself! 1043 01:05:11,073 --> 01:05:13,492 Hey, what are you doing, Greg? Man, he's a kid. 1044 01:05:13,659 --> 01:05:16,454 Hey, Darryl, Darryl. Shut your pie-hole, man! 1045 01:05:16,621 --> 01:05:19,332 -It's football. It's football. -I know. 1046 01:05:19,498 --> 01:05:21,918 -Stop acting like a bitch. -Why you starting, man? 1047 01:05:22,084 --> 01:05:25,338 Come on, let's go. Man, come on. You guys suck. 1048 01:05:25,713 --> 01:05:27,840 It's time to kick some butt. Come on. 1049 01:05:28,591 --> 01:05:32,970 Ready, set, hike. 1050 01:05:35,389 --> 01:05:38,142 -I got him. -Nicholas, block left. Come on. 1051 01:05:40,978 --> 01:05:43,356 -Tommy. -How do you like them apples? 1052 01:05:43,522 --> 01:05:46,359 -Get him. -Yeah, come on. 1053 01:05:47,485 --> 01:05:50,696 -Yeah. -Yes. Yes. 1054 01:05:54,283 --> 01:05:58,162 Tommy, what's going on? You call that a tackle? 1055 01:05:58,621 --> 01:06:00,331 Told you, you gotta stay in the zone. 1056 01:06:00,498 --> 01:06:03,042 You gotta eat some lightning and crap thunder, son. 1057 01:06:03,209 --> 01:06:06,003 You wanna get up? Come on. Come on. Come on. 1058 01:06:07,296 --> 01:06:11,467 -Come on. Come on, man. -Shut up, Darryl. It's my son. 1059 01:06:12,343 --> 01:06:16,973 All right, it's do-or-die time. Last point wins. 1060 01:06:17,848 --> 01:06:20,309 Nicholas, you ready? 1061 01:06:21,394 --> 01:06:25,356 Purple Haze. Purple Haze 1 5. 1062 01:06:25,690 --> 01:06:29,902 Ready, set, hike. 1063 01:06:31,070 --> 01:06:32,321 Follow me. 1064 01:06:34,407 --> 01:06:36,534 -Go, Nicholas. Go, Nicholas. -Come on, come on. 1065 01:06:37,493 --> 01:06:39,078 -Bring it on. -Go. Go. 1066 01:06:41,580 --> 01:06:43,916 -Go. Oh, my goodness. -Come on, get up. 1067 01:06:45,084 --> 01:06:47,086 Go, Nicholas. Go, Nicholas. Go, Nicholas. 1068 01:06:47,253 --> 01:06:49,839 -Come on. -Tommy, hurry. 1069 01:06:50,006 --> 01:06:53,384 This team is dynamite We're dynamite 1070 01:06:54,593 --> 01:06:58,472 -That's my son. -That is my boy. That is my boy. 1071 01:06:58,639 --> 01:07:01,600 You did it, son. You crapped thunder. 1072 01:07:01,767 --> 01:07:04,395 Nine months inside. Yes. 1073 01:07:04,937 --> 01:07:06,397 Dad, Dad. 1074 01:07:07,106 --> 01:07:10,276 -Yeah, son? -You suck. 1075 01:07:10,901 --> 01:07:12,695 Son, Dad hurt his pee-pee. 1076 01:07:12,862 --> 01:07:14,572 -Get up, you pussy. -I can't. 1077 01:07:18,743 --> 01:07:21,746 All right, everybody, here she comes. Everybody, on three. 1078 01:07:22,079 --> 01:07:24,457 One, two, three. 1079 01:07:29,336 --> 01:07:31,047 They trying to punk me. 1080 01:07:33,174 --> 01:07:36,218 AII these peopIe trying to make a fooI out of me. 1081 01:07:36,385 --> 01:07:37,970 Trying to make me cry. 1082 01:07:38,220 --> 01:07:43,225 I didn't cry when I went to prison, and I ain't gonna cry now. 1083 01:07:43,392 --> 01:07:48,147 I don't care if I never had a mother who threw me a party. 1084 01:07:48,814 --> 01:07:53,861 Today is my birthday and I'm gonna smiIe, damn it. 1085 01:07:57,656 --> 01:07:59,366 I wish I had a famiIy. 1086 01:07:59,533 --> 01:08:03,496 Well done, baby. What is this, Dad? 1087 01:08:03,662 --> 01:08:06,665 I got a gift for the kid. I know I've been a little tough on him. 1088 01:08:06,832 --> 01:08:09,835 But it ain't easy when I've been the center of all the attention... 1089 01:08:10,002 --> 01:08:12,505 ...and all of a sudden, a kid walk in the house. A baby. 1090 01:08:12,671 --> 01:08:16,133 I want you to know now, from now on, I'm here to help. 1091 01:08:16,842 --> 01:08:20,387 Now, Calvin, make a wish. 1092 01:08:20,554 --> 01:08:25,684 And I hope all of your wishes come true. 1093 01:08:37,530 --> 01:08:39,115 Oh, great, you're here. 1094 01:08:39,365 --> 01:08:41,700 The bouncy's in the back. Just go around the side. 1095 01:08:41,867 --> 01:08:43,369 No, I'm here to get my son. 1096 01:08:44,954 --> 01:08:46,664 Little dude. Little man. 1097 01:08:46,956 --> 01:08:48,582 -Son? -That's right. 1098 01:08:48,749 --> 01:08:51,836 I didn't think I could do it, but I got myself together, baby. 1099 01:08:52,002 --> 01:08:55,172 So if you just give me the boy, we're gonna slide out of here. 1100 01:08:55,339 --> 01:08:59,009 So you're the guy who left his baby on my doorstep... 1101 01:08:59,176 --> 01:09:02,012 -...in a dog basket? -That's right, but that was a mistake. 1102 01:09:02,179 --> 01:09:04,014 The guy who gave his own kid a tattoo? 1103 01:09:04,181 --> 01:09:06,725 Wait. I can explain that. His mother was in the service. 1104 01:09:06,892 --> 01:09:10,604 The person responsible for allowing his baby boy to take a knife in the gut? 1105 01:09:10,771 --> 01:09:12,398 Wait. The boy needed discipline. 1106 01:09:12,565 --> 01:09:14,191 -You should be castrated. -What? 1107 01:09:14,358 --> 01:09:16,235 Ain't nothing wrong with my bowel movement. 1108 01:09:16,402 --> 01:09:19,029 I go two, three times a day. Let me tell you something. 1109 01:09:19,196 --> 01:09:21,198 I ain't got to explain nothing. I'm a grown-- 1110 01:09:21,365 --> 01:09:24,660 You just caught yourself the official Brooklyn beat-down, homes. 1111 01:09:24,827 --> 01:09:26,996 You just entered the dragon, homeboy. 1112 01:09:27,163 --> 01:09:29,456 Word up. I'm gonna tap you right on your Flintstone. 1113 01:09:29,623 --> 01:09:32,376 Here it come, homeboy. Here it come, homeboy. Here it-- 1114 01:09:37,006 --> 01:09:38,716 Who is Mike Jones? 1115 01:09:40,509 --> 01:09:42,595 Get the hell out of here. And don't come back. 1116 01:09:45,556 --> 01:09:47,474 I want my mother. 1117 01:09:48,434 --> 01:09:52,104 Looks like Percy's partner decided to keep the rock for himself. 1118 01:09:52,271 --> 01:09:55,107 -Better go tell Mr. Walken. -Yeah. 1119 01:09:55,399 --> 01:09:59,278 There you go. Good. 1120 01:09:59,945 --> 01:10:01,405 -Come on. -Honestly, Janet... 1121 01:10:01,572 --> 01:10:02,948 ...I don't know how you do it. 1122 01:10:03,115 --> 01:10:05,284 -What's that, sweetie? -All of this. 1123 01:10:05,451 --> 01:10:07,703 The parenting, the responsibility. 1124 01:10:07,870 --> 01:10:10,164 It's really no different than any other career. 1125 01:10:10,873 --> 01:10:14,126 I mean, you have scheduling, you have planning. Budgeting, of course. 1126 01:10:14,293 --> 01:10:16,962 I guess the big difference is that my boss... 1127 01:10:17,129 --> 01:10:19,298 ...I want to slather in kisses all day long. 1128 01:10:19,632 --> 01:10:22,635 And I can, without being sued for sexual harassment. 1129 01:10:24,470 --> 01:10:26,639 And you don't miss the job at all? 1130 01:10:26,805 --> 01:10:29,642 You know, sometimes I think I miss it... 1131 01:10:29,808 --> 01:10:32,311 ...but then I remember all they really liked about me... 1132 01:10:32,478 --> 01:10:34,313 ...was the money that I made for them. 1133 01:10:34,813 --> 01:10:39,693 You know? I mean, this.... This is real. These guys dig me. 1134 01:10:39,860 --> 01:10:43,989 I am a diva, a giant, a goddess. 1135 01:10:44,156 --> 01:10:46,617 I'm perfect. Aren't I perfect? 1136 01:10:49,286 --> 01:10:51,330 Mommy, I don't feel good. 1137 01:10:51,497 --> 01:10:53,791 What's the matter, honey? You got a tummy ache? 1138 01:10:53,958 --> 01:10:57,503 Yeah? Think maybe it's from eating 1 6 pieces of cake... 1139 01:10:57,670 --> 01:10:59,213 ...and beef jerky... 1140 01:10:59,380 --> 01:11:01,674 ...and a balloon? Yeah. 1141 01:11:03,384 --> 01:11:07,304 -Is he gonna be okay? -Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. 1142 01:11:07,471 --> 01:11:08,973 Just a little teaspoon of this-- 1143 01:11:09,139 --> 01:11:10,349 It is magic. 1144 01:11:10,516 --> 01:11:14,353 --and he will poop very shortly. 1145 01:11:14,979 --> 01:11:16,647 It'll slide right out. 1146 01:11:18,649 --> 01:11:19,692 Good boy. 1147 01:11:20,109 --> 01:11:22,027 Well, maybe you should take him home. 1148 01:11:22,194 --> 01:11:23,862 Yes, maybe we shall. 1149 01:11:24,029 --> 01:11:26,991 -You wanna go home? -And you too. Yeah. 1150 01:11:28,325 --> 01:11:30,536 Oh, goodness, what do you feed this kid? 1151 01:11:30,703 --> 01:11:32,121 What do I feed you? 1152 01:11:32,288 --> 01:11:34,206 -All right. I'll see you soon? -Okay. 1153 01:11:34,373 --> 01:11:36,208 -Thank you. -See you later. Come on, hon. 1154 01:11:36,375 --> 01:11:39,586 Such a good boy, helping your mom. 1155 01:12:01,775 --> 01:12:04,361 Oh, sweetie. Wha--? 1156 01:12:04,695 --> 01:12:08,407 Oh, honey, what's wrong? Sweetie? 1157 01:12:08,574 --> 01:12:11,702 -Hey, little man, what's the matter? -I don't think he's feeling well. 1158 01:12:11,869 --> 01:12:13,662 Are you okay? 1159 01:12:16,999 --> 01:12:19,626 What's the matter, you gotta make a poo-poos? 1160 01:12:20,961 --> 01:12:24,423 You gotta make a poo-poo. He gotta make a little poo-poo, yeah. 1161 01:12:27,301 --> 01:12:28,719 God. 1162 01:12:29,261 --> 01:12:31,430 What's going on, man, huh? 1163 01:12:45,402 --> 01:12:48,447 Ain't that cute. He made a little surprise... 1164 01:12:48,614 --> 01:12:49,990 ...for Mommy. 1165 01:12:50,157 --> 01:12:51,450 -Mom--? For me? -Go ahead. 1166 01:12:51,617 --> 01:12:54,787 -Mommy take care. -Darryl, why me? I did it last time. 1167 01:12:54,953 --> 01:12:56,872 Wash your hands before you make dinner. 1168 01:12:57,039 --> 01:12:58,832 Come on, Calvin. 1169 01:12:59,625 --> 01:13:00,793 Come on. 1170 01:13:08,550 --> 01:13:10,469 Man, what a day. 1171 01:13:12,638 --> 01:13:15,182 -I can't believe you did this. -Did what? 1172 01:13:15,349 --> 01:13:18,769 -This. Darryl, it's so beautiful. -I did-- I-- 1173 01:13:18,936 --> 01:13:21,271 It's so romantic, the way you put it in his diaper. 1174 01:13:21,438 --> 01:13:24,566 Then you made me change him even though I didn't want to. Oh, so-- 1175 01:13:25,317 --> 01:13:27,486 -No, but, honey-- -We should go out and celebrate. 1176 01:13:27,653 --> 01:13:29,321 -Somewhere nice? I'll change. -Wait. 1177 01:13:29,488 --> 01:13:31,990 Thank you, baby. I love it, I love it, I love it. 1178 01:13:32,157 --> 01:13:35,452 -I love it, I love it, I love it. -I gotta talk to you. 1179 01:13:35,619 --> 01:13:37,454 -Baby, come here. -Damn. 1180 01:13:40,791 --> 01:13:42,501 Are you sure you guys are gonna be okay? 1181 01:13:42,668 --> 01:13:46,672 -We'll be fine, won't we, little boy? -I love Papa. 1182 01:13:46,839 --> 01:13:48,465 -All right. Bye. -Okay. 1183 01:13:48,632 --> 01:13:50,843 Y'all have a good time, now. I know we will. 1184 01:13:53,137 --> 01:13:54,847 Bye-bye. 1185 01:13:55,347 --> 01:13:59,518 We going to have a good time. He's a nice little boy too. Yes, indeedy. 1186 01:13:59,685 --> 01:14:02,604 He's a cute little boy too. Look at the little baby. 1187 01:14:02,771 --> 01:14:06,525 Yeah, he's a good little boy. One, two, three. 1188 01:14:08,694 --> 01:14:11,029 Now, you come clean, you little punk. Who are you? 1189 01:14:11,196 --> 01:14:13,949 Where you from? What you all about? What is all this? 1190 01:14:17,536 --> 01:14:20,539 Look here, old man. You been a real pain in my butt. 1191 01:14:20,706 --> 01:14:23,041 And you're right, I did rob that jewelry store. 1192 01:14:23,208 --> 01:14:26,211 And now there's some real bad people after me. 1193 01:14:26,378 --> 01:14:28,547 And the people you love are gonna get hurt... 1194 01:14:28,714 --> 01:14:30,174 ...if I don't get that diamond. 1195 01:14:30,340 --> 01:14:34,887 And I don't want that to happen, so you better just stay out of my way. 1196 01:14:40,893 --> 01:14:43,562 Hey, yo, Percy, it's me. Be here in a hour. 1197 01:14:43,729 --> 01:14:46,398 -I'll have the diamond then. -How can you do this to us? 1198 01:14:46,982 --> 01:14:49,151 We took you in, thought you were a child in need. 1199 01:14:49,318 --> 01:14:52,905 -You turn out to be a lowlife thief. -Look, I didn't mean for it to go this far. 1200 01:14:53,071 --> 01:14:55,157 I was just trying to get my diamond and be out. 1201 01:14:55,324 --> 01:14:59,411 -You ain't getting away with it. -Then it's time to dance. Come on. 1202 01:15:00,621 --> 01:15:02,414 -Baby, I-- -Sweetheart... 1203 01:15:02,581 --> 01:15:04,583 ...this means so much to me. 1204 01:15:04,750 --> 01:15:06,877 I know it's not real. Look at the size of this. 1205 01:15:07,044 --> 01:15:09,046 There's no way you could afford that, but.... 1206 01:15:09,254 --> 01:15:13,759 Well, it's what the ring symbolizes that makes it so special to me. 1207 01:15:13,926 --> 01:15:16,595 -Yeah, about that, baby. I didn't-- -Please. Let me finish. 1208 01:15:16,762 --> 01:15:20,933 Please. I know that you are not the one who isn't ready. It's me. 1209 01:15:21,099 --> 01:15:23,685 I have always needed for everything to fit my schedule. 1210 01:15:23,852 --> 01:15:27,231 And you have shown me that sometimes life doesn't work that way. 1211 01:15:27,397 --> 01:15:31,276 It's unpredictable, and sometimes you have to go with the flow and.... 1212 01:15:31,443 --> 01:15:33,445 I'll never be ready until it just happens. 1213 01:15:33,612 --> 01:15:36,907 -Vanessa, I just wanna tell you-- -I think that we should just do it. 1214 01:15:37,950 --> 01:15:39,576 Do what? 1215 01:15:39,785 --> 01:15:41,119 Let's adopt him. 1216 01:15:41,286 --> 01:15:43,789 Tomorrow let's take the baby to Child Services... 1217 01:15:43,956 --> 01:15:45,249 ...and start the paperwork. 1218 01:15:45,415 --> 01:15:46,959 You mean we can keep him? 1219 01:15:47,125 --> 01:15:49,044 -Yeah. -Yes. 1220 01:15:50,295 --> 01:15:52,256 So, what did you wanna tell me? 1221 01:15:54,550 --> 01:15:55,551 Nothing. 1222 01:15:55,717 --> 01:15:57,553 Nothing at all. Let's-- Let's toast. 1223 01:15:58,053 --> 01:15:59,680 Okay. 1224 01:16:03,225 --> 01:16:04,977 You don't mess with a man from Detroit. 1225 01:16:05,143 --> 01:16:06,311 I'm from Detroit. 1226 01:16:06,478 --> 01:16:08,647 The hell you doing? 1227 01:16:08,814 --> 01:16:10,732 -What's going on? -Daddy, get off of him. 1228 01:16:10,899 --> 01:16:12,943 -Get off of the baby. -Stop it. 1229 01:16:13,110 --> 01:16:14,611 Ain't no baby. That's a criminal. 1230 01:16:14,778 --> 01:16:17,948 I have had it with you. I'm calling Whispering Glen. 1231 01:16:18,115 --> 01:16:19,366 Vanessa, I ain't crazy. 1232 01:16:19,533 --> 01:16:22,286 You see, I know what is and I know what ain't is. 1233 01:16:22,452 --> 01:16:24,621 And he ain't is what he say he is. 1234 01:16:24,788 --> 01:16:26,999 You see, "is" is and "ain'ts" ain't. 1235 01:16:27,416 --> 01:16:29,126 Check the teddy bear. The teddy bear. 1236 01:16:29,293 --> 01:16:30,752 Teddy bear knows. 1237 01:16:30,919 --> 01:16:33,630 -Come on, then. Please. -We'll take good care of your father. 1238 01:16:33,797 --> 01:16:35,841 Whispering Glen is a safe facility. 1239 01:16:36,008 --> 01:16:38,093 Give him a couple of days to adjust... 1240 01:16:38,260 --> 01:16:40,596 -Let me go. -...and then come visit. 1241 01:16:48,687 --> 01:16:52,691 Vanessa, believe me. "Is" is, "ain'ts" ain't. 1242 01:16:52,858 --> 01:16:54,860 Use the Taser if you have to. 1243 01:16:55,027 --> 01:16:56,486 Check the teddy bear. 1244 01:16:56,653 --> 01:16:58,155 The teddy bear. 1245 01:17:00,324 --> 01:17:02,200 I'm gonna go put him to bed. 1246 01:17:02,784 --> 01:17:04,328 Yeah. 1247 01:17:12,794 --> 01:17:13,795 Man. 1248 01:17:14,796 --> 01:17:18,175 How does one child turn a household upside down in a weekend? 1249 01:17:18,550 --> 01:17:21,637 Look at this place. It's a mess. 1250 01:17:36,735 --> 01:17:38,570 Check the teddy bear. The teddy bear. 1251 01:17:38,737 --> 01:17:40,280 Teddy bear knows. 1252 01:17:42,658 --> 01:17:44,242 Grandpa bad. 1253 01:17:44,409 --> 01:17:47,037 No. No, baby. No, no, no. 1254 01:17:47,204 --> 01:17:49,706 Papa's not bad. He didn't mean to hurt you. He just-- 1255 01:17:50,415 --> 01:17:53,543 He's a little.... Yeah. 1256 01:18:20,570 --> 01:18:23,281 Now, Iook here, oId man. You've been a reaI pain in the butt. 1257 01:18:23,949 --> 01:18:26,201 And you're right, I did rob that jeweIry store. 1258 01:18:26,368 --> 01:18:28,954 And now there's a Iot of bad peopIe after me. 1259 01:18:29,121 --> 01:18:30,747 PeopIe you Iove are gonna get hurt... 1260 01:18:30,914 --> 01:18:32,457 ...if I don't get the diamond back. 1261 01:18:32,624 --> 01:18:33,917 Vanessa. 1262 01:18:34,084 --> 01:18:35,252 Vanessa. 1263 01:18:35,961 --> 01:18:38,505 -Where's Calvin? -I put him in the cr-- 1264 01:18:38,672 --> 01:18:40,924 -Where's the diamond? -It was-- 1265 01:18:41,758 --> 01:18:43,969 -Gone. -Damn. Pops was right. 1266 01:18:44,136 --> 01:18:46,972 -I'm calling the police. -I'm gonna get my dad. 1267 01:18:48,682 --> 01:18:49,808 Dad! 1268 01:18:49,975 --> 01:18:52,352 Yes, I have some information on a stolen diamond. 1269 01:18:53,145 --> 01:18:54,688 That's what I'm talking about. 1270 01:18:54,855 --> 01:18:56,690 We did it. We rich, baby. 1271 01:18:58,608 --> 01:19:01,820 -Yes. Just in the nick of time. -We blinging. 1272 01:19:01,987 --> 01:19:03,947 Walken and his goons is going to that house. 1273 01:19:04,322 --> 01:19:05,574 -What? -Don't worry. 1274 01:19:05,741 --> 01:19:07,701 He thinks Darryl's my partner. 1275 01:19:07,868 --> 01:19:10,787 You idiot. Walken will kill him if he don't have his diamond. 1276 01:19:10,954 --> 01:19:14,166 Exactly. Which means he won't be coming after you. 1277 01:19:14,332 --> 01:19:17,794 It's perfect. We get away scot-free. 1278 01:19:20,005 --> 01:19:21,548 This is the time you hit me, right? 1279 01:19:24,885 --> 01:19:26,428 Let me pull over. 1280 01:19:29,431 --> 01:19:32,726 Don't start beating me like I'm a R & B singer, man. 1281 01:19:34,352 --> 01:19:37,481 Police is here. Hey. 1282 01:19:38,607 --> 01:19:40,650 Hey. Can I help you? 1283 01:19:40,817 --> 01:19:42,778 Is this the guy that double-crossed Percy? 1284 01:19:42,944 --> 01:19:44,196 Yeah, that's the guy, boss. 1285 01:19:44,362 --> 01:19:47,532 I don't know anybody named Percy. You must got the wrong guy. 1286 01:19:47,866 --> 01:19:50,327 -Cut the crap. I want my diamond. -I don't have it. 1287 01:19:50,494 --> 01:19:53,121 Too bad. I guess we're gonna have to beat it out of you. 1288 01:19:53,288 --> 01:19:56,041 I just called the police. And they're on their way over here. 1289 01:19:56,374 --> 01:19:58,668 Really? That doesn't leave us much time then. 1290 01:19:59,836 --> 01:20:02,506 -Take him. -Wait, wait, wait. Wait, guys. 1291 01:20:04,132 --> 01:20:05,300 Dada? 1292 01:20:08,053 --> 01:20:09,721 Dada. 1293 01:20:10,597 --> 01:20:11,681 Who's this little guy? 1294 01:20:12,974 --> 01:20:14,559 That's my son. 1295 01:20:17,187 --> 01:20:18,230 Take him upstairs. 1296 01:20:20,148 --> 01:20:22,567 -I wanna talk to you. -Cute kid. 1297 01:20:22,734 --> 01:20:25,403 It's-- Just-- I don't have-- Listen. That's my nipple. 1298 01:20:30,408 --> 01:20:31,535 Time to take a nap. 1299 01:20:31,701 --> 01:20:33,286 Night-night? 1300 01:20:33,453 --> 01:20:36,414 And don't worry about any loud noises you may hear downstairs. 1301 01:20:36,581 --> 01:20:38,834 It's just us beating up your daddy. 1302 01:20:41,002 --> 01:20:42,587 Here you are. 1303 01:20:45,757 --> 01:20:47,926 Nighty-night. 1304 01:21:24,129 --> 01:21:25,463 Click. 1305 01:21:30,760 --> 01:21:33,305 Now tell me, where's my diamond? 1306 01:21:33,471 --> 01:21:34,806 I told you, I don't have it. 1307 01:21:34,973 --> 01:21:36,892 You don't tell me where my diamond is... 1308 01:21:37,058 --> 01:21:40,687 ...that cute little baby of yours is gonna get hurt. 1309 01:21:47,110 --> 01:21:49,654 Moron, get the kid. Get the kid. 1310 01:21:51,364 --> 01:21:52,616 I want him. 1311 01:21:58,413 --> 01:21:59,873 There you are, little buddy. 1312 01:22:01,166 --> 01:22:02,542 Come on. 1313 01:22:02,709 --> 01:22:04,044 Come to Uncle Rosco. 1314 01:22:13,011 --> 01:22:14,638 Okay. Play nicey-nicey. 1315 01:22:44,501 --> 01:22:46,378 Okay, get your ass up. 1316 01:22:46,544 --> 01:22:49,506 Yeah, get up. I got you now. 1317 01:22:49,673 --> 01:22:51,216 Yeah. Yeah. 1318 01:22:52,050 --> 01:22:53,301 Ain't so tough now, are you? 1319 01:22:57,806 --> 01:22:59,474 Back up. Or I'll shoot you. 1320 01:22:59,891 --> 01:23:01,726 Shoot me, tough guy. Come on. 1321 01:23:04,396 --> 01:23:05,563 Oh, boy. 1322 01:23:05,730 --> 01:23:07,148 I'm surrounded by morons. 1323 01:23:07,649 --> 01:23:09,526 Here. You dropped your gun, sir. 1324 01:23:09,693 --> 01:23:12,153 Here you go. It's all yours. 1325 01:23:12,320 --> 01:23:14,197 -What are you gonna do? -Wait, wait, I-- 1326 01:23:14,364 --> 01:23:17,117 Come on, get out of here. Come on. 1327 01:23:21,579 --> 01:23:22,580 All right, dude. 1328 01:23:22,747 --> 01:23:27,252 You busted my Sergio da Vincis, $62.50 designer frames. 1329 01:23:27,419 --> 01:23:30,422 Not cool. Not cool. 1330 01:23:30,922 --> 01:23:32,090 Okay, buddy. 1331 01:23:32,257 --> 01:23:34,676 We can either do this the easy way or the hard way. 1332 01:23:35,510 --> 01:23:38,930 I think I like it the hard way. 1333 01:23:48,356 --> 01:23:49,858 Did we get him? 1334 01:23:50,567 --> 01:23:51,776 He's yours, man. 1335 01:24:00,076 --> 01:24:01,077 Dude... 1336 01:24:02,287 --> 01:24:04,122 ...you just woke the dragon up. 1337 01:24:04,289 --> 01:24:05,957 Prepare for pain. 1338 01:24:06,124 --> 01:24:08,960 It's time for the dragon to go back to sleep. 1339 01:24:20,972 --> 01:24:22,766 What are you doing? 1340 01:24:25,101 --> 01:24:27,979 -Stop. -You going down, Sasquatch. 1341 01:24:28,146 --> 01:24:29,981 Better not. 1342 01:24:49,501 --> 01:24:51,044 What the hell is going on here? 1343 01:24:51,211 --> 01:24:52,754 That ain't no baby. 1344 01:24:52,921 --> 01:24:54,130 -Who else is here? -Nobody. 1345 01:24:54,297 --> 01:24:56,674 -Who's here? -Nobody, I swear. 1346 01:24:56,841 --> 01:24:58,426 Come on. 1347 01:24:58,593 --> 01:25:00,929 Inside. Inside. 1348 01:25:02,180 --> 01:25:03,389 There's the little monster. 1349 01:25:04,015 --> 01:25:05,975 Listen, what does he got there? 1350 01:25:06,351 --> 01:25:08,853 -It's an airplane. -Tell him to get rid of the plane. 1351 01:25:10,188 --> 01:25:11,231 Get rid of it. 1352 01:25:12,524 --> 01:25:14,776 Calvin, throw the plane. 1353 01:25:24,869 --> 01:25:25,870 What are you doing? 1354 01:25:32,210 --> 01:25:33,837 Don't move. 1355 01:25:35,088 --> 01:25:36,756 Save it, tough guy. 1356 01:25:36,923 --> 01:25:39,050 You're not gonna shoot me. 1357 01:25:39,634 --> 01:25:40,885 But I will. 1358 01:25:42,720 --> 01:25:43,847 Freeze! Police! 1359 01:25:44,013 --> 01:25:45,431 Freeze! Police! 1360 01:25:45,598 --> 01:25:47,600 I got this. You check the house. 1361 01:25:48,726 --> 01:25:51,688 Black cops, come with me. White lady, you stay here. 1362 01:25:51,896 --> 01:25:53,898 I'm telling you, guys, that ain't no baby. 1363 01:25:54,065 --> 01:25:56,317 He's the mastermind behind the whole thing. 1364 01:25:56,484 --> 01:25:58,027 Get him out of here. 1365 01:25:58,194 --> 01:26:00,738 He's a stone-cold killer, that kid. 1366 01:26:02,157 --> 01:26:03,658 Would you get this thing off me? 1367 01:26:03,825 --> 01:26:07,245 Relax. Where you're going, you might want to keep that on. 1368 01:26:07,787 --> 01:26:09,581 I don't wanna go to jail. 1369 01:26:09,747 --> 01:26:11,833 It's too dark. There's no TV. 1370 01:26:16,796 --> 01:26:18,506 Hey, where you going, little guy? 1371 01:26:21,926 --> 01:26:23,761 Ain't this your kid? 1372 01:26:23,928 --> 01:26:24,929 Dada? 1373 01:26:26,431 --> 01:26:27,932 Yeah, that's my son. 1374 01:26:28,391 --> 01:26:30,351 Now, Calvin... 1375 01:26:30,518 --> 01:26:32,770 ...don't you have something for the nice policeman? 1376 01:26:34,439 --> 01:26:36,274 -No. -Come on. 1377 01:26:36,441 --> 01:26:39,402 You don't wanna go to prison with the rest of the bad men, do you? 1378 01:26:45,116 --> 01:26:46,242 There we go. 1379 01:26:46,409 --> 01:26:48,453 Hey, the diamond. 1380 01:26:48,620 --> 01:26:51,414 Thanks, kid. Now your dad's gonna get a big reward. 1381 01:26:51,581 --> 01:26:53,917 -A reward? -Yeah, the insurance company... 1382 01:26:54,083 --> 01:26:56,794 ...offered $1 00,000 to whoever found the diamond. 1383 01:26:56,961 --> 01:26:58,546 A hundred thousand dollars? 1384 01:26:59,130 --> 01:27:00,632 God, that's gonna come in handy. 1385 01:27:00,798 --> 01:27:02,300 Shoot, I could get my car fixed... 1386 01:27:02,467 --> 01:27:04,219 ...get a new wedding ring for my wife... 1387 01:27:04,385 --> 01:27:07,722 ...I could take a vacation, buy a TV set-- 1388 01:27:08,181 --> 01:27:10,099 And if there's any change left over... 1389 01:27:10,266 --> 01:27:13,144 ...I'll give a little something to my son. 1390 01:27:13,478 --> 01:27:16,147 Right. Well, we'll be in touch. 1391 01:27:26,491 --> 01:27:27,659 So.... 1392 01:27:27,909 --> 01:27:30,703 Oh, come on. Let's not get all mushy about this. 1393 01:27:30,870 --> 01:27:33,831 Let's just shake hands and part ways like men. 1394 01:27:33,998 --> 01:27:35,959 All right? No hard feelings? 1395 01:27:36,334 --> 01:27:38,753 -Nah, no hard feelings. -All right. 1396 01:27:38,920 --> 01:27:41,798 Besides, it was kind of cool having a son for a minute. 1397 01:27:41,965 --> 01:27:44,968 See? There you go with all that sentimental stuff. 1398 01:27:45,843 --> 01:27:47,428 If that's the game you wanna play... 1399 01:27:47,595 --> 01:27:50,515 ...I guess it was cool having you as a fa-- 1400 01:27:50,890 --> 01:27:52,058 Oh, boy. 1401 01:27:52,225 --> 01:27:56,312 What I'm trying to say is, I've never really had a daddy. 1402 01:27:57,105 --> 01:27:58,398 I guess what I'm saying is... 1403 01:27:58,564 --> 01:28:00,733 ...you're gonna make a great father, all right? 1404 01:28:00,900 --> 01:28:02,652 There, I said it. Are you happy now? 1405 01:28:04,070 --> 01:28:05,905 Now, I'm gonna walk out that back door... 1406 01:28:06,072 --> 01:28:09,867 ...and you ain't gonna see me no more. Ever. 1407 01:28:10,868 --> 01:28:12,620 -But-- -Oh, it hurts. 1408 01:28:12,787 --> 01:28:14,622 -We-- -I know. 1409 01:28:14,789 --> 01:28:16,291 We'll never see each other again. 1410 01:28:16,457 --> 01:28:18,751 -But we-- -Maybe that's for the best. 1411 01:28:18,918 --> 01:28:20,086 You'll start a family... 1412 01:28:20,253 --> 01:28:23,172 ...and you won't need a lowlife criminal like... 1413 01:28:23,339 --> 01:28:25,174 ...Calvin Sims around anymore. 1414 01:28:25,341 --> 01:28:28,886 Actually what I was gonna say is, we don't have a back door. 1415 01:28:29,053 --> 01:28:31,389 Okay, well, then I'll go out the front. 1416 01:28:32,265 --> 01:28:34,809 -Fine. -Well.... 1417 01:28:35,393 --> 01:28:39,814 I'll be out of your lives for good, never to return again. 1418 01:28:40,398 --> 01:28:41,983 Cool. 1419 01:28:45,570 --> 01:28:46,988 So long. 1420 01:28:47,155 --> 01:28:50,700 Farewell. Oh, God. 1421 01:28:53,745 --> 01:28:57,081 Aren't you gonna miss me? Just a little bit? 1422 01:28:57,248 --> 01:29:00,752 -See you around, buddy. -No? 1423 01:29:01,336 --> 01:29:02,545 Take care. 1424 01:29:03,046 --> 01:29:04,672 Goodbye. 1425 01:29:04,839 --> 01:29:10,053 It's so hard to say goodbye 1426 01:29:24,400 --> 01:29:26,527 Why? 1427 01:29:27,320 --> 01:29:31,449 Nobody loves Calvin. 1428 01:29:31,616 --> 01:29:33,618 Because I'm short. 1429 01:29:34,619 --> 01:29:37,705 -They think I'm ugly. -Hey, little man. 1430 01:29:38,623 --> 01:29:40,291 Wanna share a glass of milk? 1431 01:29:50,301 --> 01:29:53,096 Enough of all this girlie stuff. This ain't Brokeback Mountain. 1432 01:29:54,222 --> 01:29:56,808 Hey, how about we put a little bit of liquor in that milk? 1433 01:29:56,974 --> 01:29:58,768 Forget that. Let's go to a bar. 1434 01:29:58,935 --> 01:30:00,103 All right. Bet. 1435 01:30:00,269 --> 01:30:02,772 -Are you over 21 ? -And then some. 1436 01:30:02,980 --> 01:30:04,482 All right. 1437 01:30:06,734 --> 01:30:08,861 Hey, I know this great strip club. 1438 01:30:09,320 --> 01:30:11,239 Don't say that loud. My wife might get mad. 1439 01:30:11,406 --> 01:30:13,157 -Oh, sorry. -Got change of a hundred? 1440 01:30:13,324 --> 01:30:15,660 -No, we steal it from Pops. -All right. All singles. 1441 01:30:29,090 --> 01:30:31,843 You a cute little fellow. Yes, you are. 1442 01:30:32,009 --> 01:30:34,762 Take after your mama. You got a lot of grandpoppy in you too. 1443 01:30:34,929 --> 01:30:39,183 Yes, you do, little boy. Look at the little boy. 1444 01:30:39,600 --> 01:30:41,352 Where's the bottle? The kid is starving. 1445 01:30:41,519 --> 01:30:43,855 I'm coming. I'm coming. Old grouch. 1446 01:30:44,564 --> 01:30:45,857 Here he comes, little boy. 1447 01:30:46,023 --> 01:30:50,570 Don't worry. We gonna get you some milk. Yeah. 1448 01:30:50,945 --> 01:30:53,197 That little guy's so cute... 1449 01:30:53,364 --> 01:30:55,533 ...it's making me go soft. 1450 01:30:55,700 --> 01:30:58,035 He look just like his daddy. 1451 01:31:00,621 --> 01:31:03,124 Howdy-do, little boy.