1 00:00:07,208 --> 00:00:10,209 [CHEERING] 2 00:00:12,980 --> 00:00:14,813 AAH! 3 00:00:14,815 --> 00:00:16,515 OHH! 4 00:00:16,517 --> 00:00:18,684 UNH. SURRENDER THE UKRONO HOURGLASS, 5 00:00:18,686 --> 00:00:21,587 AND I PROMISE YOU A QUICK END. 6 00:00:21,589 --> 00:00:25,224 YOU WANT THE UKRONO, HUNTSFOOL... 7 00:00:26,260 --> 00:00:28,761 COME AND GET IT. 8 00:00:28,763 --> 00:00:31,830 [SCREAMS] 9 00:00:34,301 --> 00:00:37,836 IT'S A BASE HIT FOR THE AM DRAG. THE CROWD GOES WILD. 10 00:00:37,838 --> 00:00:41,573 [IMITATES CROWD CHEERING] 11 00:00:42,109 --> 00:00:47,146 YOU ARE NO MATCH FOR ME. I'VE BEEN HUNTING YOUR KIND FOR 20 YEARS. 12 00:00:47,148 --> 00:00:49,014 HOW NICE FOR YOU. 13 00:00:49,016 --> 00:00:50,282 AAH! 14 00:00:50,284 --> 00:00:53,585 GROUND BALL UP THE MIDDLE-- 15 00:00:57,324 --> 00:01:00,692 [CHEERING] 16 00:01:00,694 --> 00:01:04,263 NOW WHERE COULD JAKE BE? IS HE STILL STUDYING AT THE LIBRARY? 17 00:01:04,265 --> 00:01:07,099 ACTUALLY, DADDY, HE'S ON A MISSION TO GET-- 18 00:01:07,101 --> 00:01:09,268 A MISSION TO GET AN "A" IN ENGLISH. 19 00:01:09,270 --> 00:01:12,271 HA HA. AW, THAT IS MY LITTLE JAKESTER. 20 00:01:12,273 --> 00:01:15,574 ALWAYS GOT BOTH FEET ON THE GROUND. 21 00:01:20,748 --> 00:01:24,049 THE HOURGLASS IS MINE. UHH. 22 00:01:25,586 --> 00:01:28,720 OHH... 23 00:01:29,890 --> 00:01:31,890 HUH? SAY WHAT? 24 00:01:31,892 --> 00:01:34,793 LOOK, JAKE'S ON TV. 25 00:01:34,795 --> 00:01:36,829 LIBRARY MY AUNT FIFI. 26 00:01:36,831 --> 00:01:39,865 UH-HUH. YOU KNOW IT. SAY WHAT? 27 00:01:39,867 --> 00:01:41,700 SAY WHOO-WHOO. 28 00:01:41,702 --> 00:01:44,770 ¶ HE'S COOL, HE'S HOT LIKE A FROZEN SUN ¶ 29 00:01:44,772 --> 00:01:48,040 ¶ HE'S YOUNG AND FAST, HE'S THE CHOSEN ONE ¶ 30 00:01:48,042 --> 00:01:51,243 ¶ PEOPLE, WE'RE NOT BRAGGIN' ¶ 31 00:01:51,245 --> 00:01:54,947 ¶ HE'S THE AMERICAN DRAGON ¶ 32 00:01:54,949 --> 00:01:58,717 ¶ HE'S GONNA STOP HIS ENEMIES WITH HIS DRAGON POWER ¶ 33 00:01:58,719 --> 00:02:02,454 ¶ DRAGON TEETH, DRAGON TAIL, BURNIN' DRAGON FIRE ¶ 34 00:02:02,456 --> 00:02:04,123 ¶ A REAL LIVE WIRE ¶ 35 00:02:04,125 --> 00:02:07,159 ¶ AMERICAN DRAGON ¶ 36 00:02:07,661 --> 00:02:10,162 ¶ AMERICAN DRAGON ¶ 37 00:02:13,634 --> 00:02:17,035 ¶ HE'S THE AMERICAN DRAGON ¶ 38 00:02:17,037 --> 00:02:19,037 ¶ HIS SKILLS ARE GETTIN' FASTER ¶ 39 00:02:19,039 --> 00:02:20,372 ¶ WITH GRANDPA, THE MASTER ¶ 40 00:02:20,374 --> 00:02:22,307 ¶ HIS DESTINY, WHAT'S UP, G? ¶ 41 00:02:22,309 --> 00:02:24,643 ¶ IT'S SHOWTIME, BABY, FOR THE LEGACY ¶ 42 00:02:24,645 --> 00:02:26,195 ¶ AMERICAN DRAGON ¶ 43 00:02:26,196 --> 00:02:27,746 ¶ I'M A DRAGON, AND I'M BRAGGIN' ¶ 44 00:02:27,748 --> 00:02:29,915 ¶ IT'S MY DESTINY ¶ 45 00:02:29,916 --> 00:02:32,083 ¶ I'M THE MAGICAL PROTECTOR FROM THE N.Y.C. ¶ 46 00:02:32,086 --> 00:02:34,186 ¶ YA HEARD? ¶ 47 00:02:34,188 --> 00:02:36,922 ¶ AMERICAN DRAGON ¶ 48 00:02:36,924 --> 00:02:39,024 YEOW! 49 00:02:41,962 --> 00:02:45,030 NO TV OR VIDEO GAMES FOR 2 WEEKS? 50 00:02:45,032 --> 00:02:47,299 UH-HUH. YOU LIED TO US, LITTLE MISTER, 51 00:02:47,301 --> 00:02:50,369 AND IN THIS HOUSE, YOU DO THE CRIME, YOU DO THE TIME. 52 00:02:50,371 --> 00:02:53,138 DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING TO SAY FOR YOURSELF? 53 00:02:53,140 --> 00:02:55,340 IT'S JUST I HAD TO DO MY DUTY. 54 00:02:55,342 --> 00:02:57,309 I MEAN, I'M THE AMERICAN... 55 00:02:57,311 --> 00:03:00,312 UH-HUH. WELL, LET'S HEAR IT, MR. BASEBALL. 56 00:03:00,314 --> 00:03:03,515 YOU'RE THE AMERICAN WHAT? 57 00:03:04,752 --> 00:03:06,151 I'M THE... 58 00:03:06,153 --> 00:03:17,396 THE AMERICAN KID WHO'S GROUNDED. 59 00:03:17,398 --> 00:03:18,330 JAKE. 60 00:03:18,332 --> 00:03:20,199 I'M REALLY SORRY ABOUT TONIGHT. 61 00:03:20,201 --> 00:03:23,936 MOM, DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW OFTEN I'VE TAKEN THE HEAT FROM DAD 62 00:03:23,938 --> 00:03:26,071 ABOUT MAGICAL STUFF HE DOESN'T KNOW ABOUT? 63 00:03:26,073 --> 00:03:30,075 WELL, IF YOU DIDN'T EAT ALL THE COOKIES, WHO THE HECK DID? 64 00:03:30,077 --> 00:03:32,211 MAGICAL ELVES? 65 00:03:32,213 --> 00:03:35,147 OH, NOW, FOR THE LAST TIME, BEDTIME MEANS BEDTIME. 66 00:03:35,149 --> 00:03:38,250 THE WORLD WON'T END IF YOU'RE IN BED BY 10:00. 67 00:03:38,252 --> 00:03:41,253 ACTUALLY, IT KINDA WILL. 68 00:03:42,423 --> 00:03:44,823 DO YOU HONESTLY EXPECT ME TO BELIEVE 69 00:03:44,825 --> 00:03:47,960 THAT A DOG ATE YOUR HOMEWORK? 70 00:03:49,430 --> 00:03:51,664 [BELCHES] 71 00:03:51,665 --> 00:03:53,899 IT'S LIKE DAD DOESN'T EVEN KNOW WHO I AM, WHO WE ARE. 72 00:03:53,901 --> 00:03:58,337 ALL THESE YEARS. DIDN'T YOU EVER WANNA TELL HIM THE TRUTH? 73 00:03:58,339 --> 00:04:00,572 COME WITH ME. 74 00:04:02,476 --> 00:04:05,010 IT WAS THE LAST DAY OF HIGH SCHOOL. 75 00:04:05,012 --> 00:04:06,511 JUNE 27TH, 1986. 76 00:04:06,513 --> 00:04:08,413 YOUR DAD AND I HAD BEEN GOING OUT A YEAR, 77 00:04:08,415 --> 00:04:10,882 SO I DECIDED TO WRITE HIM A LETTER AND TELL HIM THE TRUTH. 78 00:04:10,884 --> 00:04:14,019 THE EXISTENCE OF MAGICAL CREATURES, ALL OF IT. 79 00:04:14,021 --> 00:04:16,405 IT'S NOT EVEN OPENED. 80 00:04:16,406 --> 00:04:18,790 I WAS GOING TO SLIP IT INTO HIS LOCKER THAT DAY, BUT I JUST COULDN'T. 81 00:04:18,792 --> 00:04:24,363 DON'T YOU EVER WONDER WHAT MIGHT'VE HAPPENED, YOU KNOW, IF YOU'D TOLD HIM THE TRUTH? 82 00:04:24,365 --> 00:04:26,798 EVERY DAY. BUT TRUST ME, JAKE, 83 00:04:26,800 --> 00:04:31,336 SOME SECRETS ARE BETTER LEFT SECRET. 84 00:04:31,772 --> 00:04:34,373 AH, YES, THE UKRONO HOURGLASS, 85 00:04:34,375 --> 00:04:37,409 BUILT BY NORDIC ELVES BACK IN 1103 A.D. 86 00:04:37,411 --> 00:04:40,012 YEAH? WELL, THAT HUNK OF JUNK GOT ME GROUNDED FOR 2 WEEKS. 87 00:04:40,014 --> 00:04:42,414 I HOPE IT WAS WORTH IT. 88 00:04:42,415 --> 00:04:44,815 JAKE, THAT JUNK HAS THE POWER TO TRANSCEND THE BOUNDARIES OF TIME. 89 00:04:44,818 --> 00:04:49,288 IF IT FELL INTO THE WRONG HANDS, WHO KNOWS WHAT UNTOLD HORRORS 90 00:04:49,290 --> 00:04:51,156 COULD BE UNLEASHED THROUGHOUT MAGICAL HISTORY. 91 00:04:51,158 --> 00:04:54,860 WHAT ABOUT THE UNTOLD HORRORS OF NO TV FOR 2 WEEKS? 92 00:04:54,862 --> 00:04:56,912 YOUNG DRAGON, 93 00:04:56,913 --> 00:04:58,963 THE CAG-ED LION DOES NOT ROAR BECAUSE IT IS CAG-ED. 94 00:04:58,966 --> 00:05:00,899 IT ROARS BECAUSE--AAH! 95 00:05:00,901 --> 00:05:02,100 THAT'S A NEW ONE. 96 00:05:02,102 --> 00:05:05,437 NO. IT'S MY BACK AGAIN. [SPEAKING CHINESE] 97 00:05:05,439 --> 00:05:08,440 I FELL FROM A LADDER THE DAY WE FIRST OPENED THE SHOP. 98 00:05:08,442 --> 00:05:10,509 TELL ME ABOUT IT. I'M THE ONE YOU FELL ON. 99 00:05:10,511 --> 00:05:14,146 COME ON, KID, WE GOTTA FIND A SAFE PLACE TO STASH THIS THING. 100 00:05:14,148 --> 00:05:19,851 SO WHAT YOU'RE SAYING IS IF SOMEONE WANTED TO USE THIS THINGY 101 00:05:19,853 --> 00:05:23,388 TO GO BACK TO, SAY, JUNE 27TH, 1986, 102 00:05:23,390 --> 00:05:25,524 THEY JUST FLIP THESE LITTLE DOOHICKEYS AROUND, 103 00:05:25,526 --> 00:05:27,492 AND PUNCH IN THE DATE AND TURN IT OVER? 104 00:05:27,494 --> 00:05:31,029 YEAH. IT'S ACTUALLY KINDA COOL THE WAY-- UH-UH, NO WAY. 105 00:05:31,031 --> 00:05:34,466 DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT. TIME TRAVELING'S A BAD IDEA. 106 00:05:34,468 --> 00:05:37,269 ONE LITTLE CHANGE, AND YOU COULD END UP THRASHING 107 00:05:37,271 --> 00:05:39,371 THE ENTIRE FABRIC OF SPACE AND TIME. 108 00:05:39,373 --> 00:05:42,341 OR I CAN CHANGE THINGS FOR THE BETTER. 109 00:05:42,343 --> 00:05:44,443 FU, THERE'S A WHOLE SIDE OF MY FAMILY 110 00:05:44,445 --> 00:05:46,311 THAT MY DAD DOESN'T KNOW ABOUT. 111 00:05:46,313 --> 00:05:48,213 I HAVE THE CHANCE TO CHANGE THAT, 112 00:05:48,215 --> 00:05:50,282 THE CHANCE TO REVERSE THE LAST 20 YEARS 113 00:05:50,284 --> 00:05:53,251 AND REDO EVERYTHING WITHOUT THE LIES, THE SECRETS, 114 00:05:53,253 --> 00:05:56,621 THE BEING GROUNDED EVERY OTHER WEEK. 115 00:05:56,622 --> 00:05:59,990 ACH, I'M SORRY, KID, REALLY, BUT IT'S JUST TOO DANGEROUS. 116 00:06:00,260 --> 00:06:03,061 I'M SORRY, TOO, FU. AHH... 117 00:06:03,063 --> 00:06:05,197 BUT I GOTTA DO WHAT I GOTTA-- NO. 118 00:06:05,199 --> 00:06:07,265 DON'T TURN IT... 119 00:06:10,170 --> 00:06:12,471 UNH. OVER. 120 00:06:12,473 --> 00:06:16,575 I-I THINK IT WORKED. 121 00:06:16,577 --> 00:06:20,278 FU, CHECK IT OUT. IT'S MY SCHOOL. 122 00:06:20,280 --> 00:06:23,048 ALL I GOTTA DO IS MAKE SURE MOM GIVES DAD THAT LETTER, 123 00:06:23,050 --> 00:06:25,050 AND WE CAN GET OUT OF HERE. 124 00:06:25,052 --> 00:06:27,619 UCH, IS THERE ANYTHING I CAN SAY TO CHANGE YOUR MIND? 125 00:06:27,621 --> 00:06:29,354 PRETTY MUCH, NO. 126 00:06:29,356 --> 00:06:32,657 UHH, ALL RIGHT, LET'S MAKE IT QUICK. 127 00:06:32,659 --> 00:06:34,393 SO, THIS IS 1986. 128 00:06:34,395 --> 00:06:37,462 THIS IS WHAT I CALL KICKING IT OLD SCHOOL. 129 00:06:37,464 --> 00:06:40,499 THESE FINALS ARE HEINOUS TO THE MAX, FER SURE. 130 00:06:40,501 --> 00:06:42,667 IT'S, LIKE, GAG ME WITH A SPOON. 131 00:06:42,669 --> 00:06:47,572 WOW, NUGGETS MADE OF CHICKENS. THAT IS SO RAD. 132 00:06:47,574 --> 00:06:50,375 Jake: NO WAY. 133 00:06:50,377 --> 00:06:54,179 UH...THOSE ARE MY PARENTS. 134 00:06:54,181 --> 00:06:57,983 SUSAN, I WANT TO SHARE SOMETHING WITH YOU, 135 00:06:57,985 --> 00:07:00,719 SOMETHING VERY SPECIAL. 136 00:07:00,721 --> 00:07:02,421 AHEM. 137 00:07:02,423 --> 00:07:04,974 [BEAT-BOXES] 138 00:07:04,975 --> 00:07:07,526 UH, WHAT THE HECK'S HE DOIN'? 139 00:07:11,565 --> 00:07:12,998 AAH! 140 00:07:13,000 --> 00:07:15,033 [CRASH] OW. 141 00:07:15,034 --> 00:07:17,067 IT'S MY LATEST BREAK-DANCE MOVES, SWEET POTATO. 142 00:07:17,070 --> 00:07:19,371 I CALL IT MY POPALACKIN', ELECTRIC-ZAPPIN', 143 00:07:19,373 --> 00:07:24,075 BUGALOO-SLUGGIN', FLIPTASTIC SHOVEL. WHAT DO YOU THINK? 144 00:07:24,077 --> 00:07:27,012 IT'S TUBULAR, JONATHAN. AND SO ARE YOU. 145 00:07:27,014 --> 00:07:29,414 I'LL SEE YOU AT THE BEACH PARTY TONIGHT. 146 00:07:29,416 --> 00:07:32,150 TILL THEN, SUGAR NUM-NUMS. 147 00:07:32,152 --> 00:07:34,519 [GIBBERISH] 148 00:07:34,521 --> 00:07:36,555 [THUD] 149 00:07:37,124 --> 00:07:38,290 I'M OK. 150 00:07:38,292 --> 00:07:42,060 I'M AMAZED HE MADE IT TO ADULTHOOD. 151 00:07:52,039 --> 00:07:55,240 MAN, SO CLOSE. 152 00:07:56,443 --> 00:07:59,411 DONE THE DO, FU. LET'S ROLL. 153 00:07:59,413 --> 00:08:03,148 NOT JUST YET. I KNOW THAT SMELL. 154 00:08:03,150 --> 00:08:06,418 IT'S SLOPPY JOE DAY. 155 00:08:07,087 --> 00:08:10,222 YOU SURE YOUR OLD MAN'S GONNA TAKE THE NEWS OK? 156 00:08:10,224 --> 00:08:13,291 TOTALLY. HE MAY BE KIND OF UPTIGHT SOMETIMES, 157 00:08:13,293 --> 00:08:15,560 BUT DEEP DOWN, MY DAD'S A COOL DUDE. 158 00:08:15,562 --> 00:08:18,463 SUSAN! YOU'RE--YOU'RE A MONSTER?! 159 00:08:18,465 --> 00:08:22,434 JONATHAN, HOW DID YOU EVEN-- I MEAN, I CAN EXPLAIN. 160 00:08:22,436 --> 00:08:25,070 EXPLAIN WHAT? THAT MY GIRLFRIEND 161 00:08:25,072 --> 00:08:28,139 IS A GRODY TO THE MAX FIRE-BREATHING DRAGON? 162 00:08:28,141 --> 00:08:32,244 I TOLD YOU, IT SKIPPED MY GENERATION, BUT MY WHOLE FAMILY-- 163 00:08:32,246 --> 00:08:35,447 NO, I DON'T WANNA HEAR ANY MORE. WE ARE FINISHED! 164 00:08:35,449 --> 00:08:38,250 ¶ LA LA LA LA LA LA LA ¶ I CAN'T HEAR YOU. 165 00:08:38,252 --> 00:08:43,455 ¶ LA LA LA LA ¶ [HUMS GIBBERISH] 166 00:08:43,457 --> 00:08:45,423 HE JUST NEEDS A LITTLE SPACE. 167 00:08:45,425 --> 00:08:50,095 I MEAN, IN 20 YEARS, THIS FILE'D BE, LIKE, ANCIENT HISTORY. 168 00:08:50,097 --> 00:08:51,530 RIGHT? GUESS AGAIN, KID. 169 00:08:51,532 --> 00:08:53,665 IF YOUR FOLKS DON'T GET BACK TOGETHER, 170 00:08:53,667 --> 00:08:56,401 YOU'RE GONNA BE ANCIENT HISTORY. 171 00:08:56,403 --> 00:08:59,237 AW, MAN! 172 00:09:02,543 --> 00:09:05,110 THE CLOCK IS RUNNING, KID. 173 00:09:05,111 --> 00:09:07,678 WE GOTTA GET YOUR PARENTS TO KISS AND MAKE UP BEFORE THE SAND RUNS OUT. 174 00:09:07,681 --> 00:09:08,747 WHERE WE GOIN' AGAIN? 175 00:09:08,749 --> 00:09:12,050 TO SEE THE ONE GUY WHO CAN HELP US. 176 00:09:14,054 --> 00:09:17,188 SHEESH, DIDN'T YOU GUYS EVER HAVE CUSTOMERS? 177 00:09:17,190 --> 00:09:20,358 EHH, WE BETTER GO IN THROUGH THE BACK. 178 00:09:20,360 --> 00:09:26,331 LOOK AT THOSE GRAPHICS. TODAY'S TECHNOLOGY IS AMAZING. 179 00:09:26,333 --> 00:09:27,465 [POUNDING ON DOOR] 180 00:09:27,467 --> 00:09:30,201 YEAH, YEAH, I'M COMIN'. 181 00:09:30,203 --> 00:09:34,506 WELL, WELL, WELL. LOOK WHO'S BEEN TIME TRAVELING AGAIN. 182 00:09:34,508 --> 00:09:36,474 NOTE TO SELF-- LAY OFF THE CANNOLIS. 183 00:09:36,476 --> 00:09:38,643 WHAT CAN I SAY? WE NEVER LEARN. 184 00:09:38,645 --> 00:09:39,711 SO, NICE PLACE. 185 00:09:39,713 --> 00:09:41,580 WHO'S THE KID? 186 00:09:41,581 --> 00:09:43,448 WAIT A MINUTE, DON'T TELL ME. I DON'T EVEN WANNA KNOW. 187 00:09:43,450 --> 00:09:45,850 DIDN'T THIS JOKER TELL YOU WHAT HAPPENED THE LAST TIME HE-- 188 00:09:45,852 --> 00:09:49,220 I MEAN, I--I MEAN, WE USED THE UKRONO? 189 00:09:49,222 --> 00:09:51,823 SO THIS IS THE ISLAND OF ATLANTIS. 190 00:09:51,825 --> 00:09:55,427 HUH, I WONDER WHAT THIS DOES. 191 00:09:55,596 --> 00:09:57,546 [SCREAMING] 192 00:09:57,547 --> 00:09:59,497 LOOK, THE OLD MAN'S GONNA FREAK IF HE SEES US TOGETHER, 193 00:09:59,499 --> 00:10:01,633 SO WE NEED YOU TO SCRAM FOR A DAY OR SO. 194 00:10:01,635 --> 00:10:04,235 UH-UH, NO WAY. AS AN OFFICIAL ANIMAL GUARDIAN, 195 00:10:04,237 --> 00:10:08,239 IT IS MY MORAL OBLIGATION TO PROTECT THE CONTINUITY-- HERE. 196 00:10:08,241 --> 00:10:10,842 THE BUS TO ATLANTIC CITY LEAVES IN AN HOUR. AVOID THE SHRIMP. 197 00:10:10,844 --> 00:10:15,347 OK, KID, HERE'S THE PLAN. I'LL GO IN AND TELL THE OLD MAN ABOUT THE BREAK-UP. 198 00:10:15,349 --> 00:10:17,682 ONCE HE HEARS HOW HEARTBROKEN YOUR MOM IS, 199 00:10:17,684 --> 00:10:20,218 HE'LL CONVINCE YOUR FOLKS TO GET BACK TOGETHER 200 00:10:20,220 --> 00:10:23,388 AND HISTORY WILL BE RIGHT ON TRACK. 201 00:10:23,390 --> 00:10:26,891 SUSAN AND JONATHAN BROKE UP? 202 00:10:26,893 --> 00:10:29,594 [SPEAKS CHINESE] THANK THE SWEET HEAVENS. 203 00:10:29,596 --> 00:10:31,529 I'VE BEEN PRAYING SHE'D CAST OFF 204 00:10:31,531 --> 00:10:33,665 THAT MEATHEADED MORTAL FOR MONTHS. WHOO-HOO. 205 00:10:33,667 --> 00:10:38,470 NO, YOU GOTTA CONVINCE HER TO GET BACK WITH JONATHAN. 206 00:10:38,472 --> 00:10:40,805 ALL RIGHT, I WILL PERSUADE MY ONLY DAUGHTER 207 00:10:40,807 --> 00:10:46,277 TO DEVOTE HER ENTIRE FUTURE TO THIS RIDICULOUS, NON-MAGICAL MISFIT. 208 00:10:46,279 --> 00:10:48,096 REALLY? 209 00:10:48,097 --> 00:10:49,914 NOT! HA HA HA. NOT. NOT. I JUST HEARD THAT TODAY. 210 00:10:49,916 --> 00:10:55,387 VERY HUMOROUS. HA HA HA. HAVE YOU GAINED WEIGHT? 211 00:10:56,390 --> 00:10:57,789 THIS IS LANA, THE LOVE LADY. 212 00:10:57,791 --> 00:11:00,458 JONATHAN FROM FILLMORE HIGH, HOW'S YOUR LOVE LIFE? 213 00:11:00,460 --> 00:11:05,263 TERRIBLE. WE WERE SUPPOSED TO BE GOING TO THIS HALLEY'S COMET PARTY 214 00:11:05,265 --> 00:11:07,549 TONIGHT AT JONES BEACH, 215 00:11:07,550 --> 00:11:09,834 BUT I JUST FOUND OUT MY GIRLFRIEND IS SOME KIND OF DRAGON. 216 00:11:09,836 --> 00:11:11,286 DRAGON. 217 00:11:11,287 --> 00:11:12,737 DRAGONS PARTYING AT JONES BEACH... 218 00:11:12,739 --> 00:11:15,540 I LOCKED IN THE FREQUENCY. 219 00:11:15,542 --> 00:11:17,175 NEXT CALLER. 220 00:11:17,177 --> 00:11:18,743 GOT IT. 221 00:11:26,286 --> 00:11:27,652 MASTER. 222 00:11:27,921 --> 00:11:29,387 YOUNG APPRENTICE, 223 00:11:29,389 --> 00:11:32,691 WE HAVE INFORMATION ON A POSSIBLE DRAGON GATHERING. 224 00:11:32,693 --> 00:11:34,659 IT IS TIME FOR YOUR FIRST HUNT. 225 00:11:34,661 --> 00:11:38,596 I SHALL SHOW NO MERCY AND SLAY MY FIRST DRAGON. 226 00:11:38,598 --> 00:11:44,436 DUDE, IS HIS VOICE EVER GONNA CHANGE? HA HA HA. 227 00:11:44,905 --> 00:11:48,406 OK, PLAN B--YOUR MOM AND DAD WERE SUPPOSED TO GO TO THAT BEACH PARTY. 228 00:11:48,408 --> 00:11:53,878 IF WE CAN GET 'EM THERE AND REUNITE THEIR VA-VA-VOOM, WE'RE BACK IN BUSINESS. 229 00:11:53,880 --> 00:11:56,481 I'LL BRING YOUR OLD MAN. YOU HANDLE YOUR MOM. 230 00:11:56,483 --> 00:11:57,982 HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO-- 231 00:11:57,984 --> 00:11:59,517 SUSAN, IT IS FOR THE BEST. 232 00:11:59,519 --> 00:12:02,454 YOU ARE BETTER OFF WITH SOMEONE WHO WALKS FORWARD. 233 00:12:02,456 --> 00:12:05,557 SOMEONE WITH A HAIRSTYLE BEFITTING TO THIS PLANET. 234 00:12:05,559 --> 00:12:10,395 SOMEONE--AAH! 235 00:12:10,397 --> 00:12:12,497 SOMEONE MAGICAL. 236 00:12:12,499 --> 00:12:15,967 YOUNG DRAGON, I AM IN YOUR DEBT. 237 00:12:15,969 --> 00:12:17,435 WHO ARE YOU? 238 00:12:17,437 --> 00:12:20,472 UH, MY NAME IS, UH... 239 00:12:20,474 --> 00:12:23,374 B-BEYONCE TIMBERLAKE. 240 00:12:23,376 --> 00:12:26,311 I'M THE, UH, CANADIAN DRAGON. EH? 241 00:12:26,313 --> 00:12:31,015 BEYONCE TIMBERLAKE? WHAT KIND OF BOGUS NAME IS BEYONCE TIMBERLAKE? 242 00:12:31,017 --> 00:12:34,452 PERHAPS THE NAME OF YOUR FUTURE HUSBAND. 243 00:12:34,454 --> 00:12:36,454 AAH! AAH! 244 00:12:36,455 --> 00:12:38,455 AS IF. DAD, I STILL LOVE JONATHAN. 245 00:12:38,458 --> 00:12:40,492 I UNDERSTAND, MY LOTUS FLOWER. 246 00:12:40,494 --> 00:12:43,995 A BROKEN HEART NEEDS TIME TO HEAL. 247 00:12:43,997 --> 00:12:46,998 WELL, TIME'S UP. [WHISTLES] 248 00:12:47,000 --> 00:12:49,567 JONES BEACH, KEEP THE METER RUNNING, 249 00:12:49,569 --> 00:12:51,569 AND HAVE THEM BACK BY MIDNIGHT. 250 00:12:51,571 --> 00:12:53,538 WHO NEEDS A STUPID BEACH PARTY? 251 00:12:53,540 --> 00:12:56,274 I CAN HAVE PLENTY OF FUN RIGHT HERE. 252 00:12:56,276 --> 00:12:57,475 HOLY HAMMOCKS. I DID IT. 253 00:12:57,477 --> 00:13:01,880 IT TOOK ME 3 YEARS, BUT I FINALLY FINISHED IT. 254 00:13:01,882 --> 00:13:04,482 WHOA. WHAT IN THE...? 255 00:13:04,484 --> 00:13:06,918 YOU GRODY MUTT. GET BACK HERE. 256 00:13:06,920 --> 00:13:10,488 BEYONCE, I'M REALLY SORRY MY DAD PUT YOU UP TO THIS. 257 00:13:10,490 --> 00:13:13,324 IT'S COOL. AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED, 258 00:13:13,326 --> 00:13:16,494 [ACCENT] IT'S ALL ABOUT YOU AND JONATHAN. 259 00:13:16,496 --> 00:13:19,297 THIS IS HOPELESS. HE ISN'T COMING. 260 00:13:19,299 --> 00:13:23,701 JONATHAN'S NEVER GONNA ACCEPT ME FOR WHO I AM. 261 00:13:24,037 --> 00:13:26,304 MOM, NO. WAIT. 262 00:13:26,306 --> 00:13:27,605 COME BACK. 263 00:13:27,607 --> 00:13:33,444 I AM NEVER TIME TRAVELING AGAIN. 264 00:13:33,446 --> 00:13:36,581 FU, WE'RE GONNA NEED A PLAN C. MOM BAILED. 265 00:13:36,583 --> 00:13:38,016 WHAT? 266 00:13:39,953 --> 00:13:41,886 KID, TIME'S ALMOST UP. 267 00:13:41,888 --> 00:13:44,389 I...BELIEVE... 268 00:13:44,391 --> 00:13:47,659 THAT'S...MINE. 269 00:13:50,030 --> 00:13:51,663 WHA-WHAT'S GOING ON HERE? 270 00:13:51,665 --> 00:13:55,700 HEY, DAD--I MEAN, DUDE, I KNOW YOU DON'T KNOW ME, 271 00:13:55,702 --> 00:13:57,535 BUT IT'S REALLY IMPORTANT 272 00:13:57,537 --> 00:14:00,505 YOU AND SUSAN GET BACK TOGETHER. LIVES DEPEND ON IT. 273 00:14:00,507 --> 00:14:04,025 WHO--WHO ARE YOU? 274 00:14:04,026 --> 00:14:07,544 I'M FROM THE FUTURE, AND YOU AND SUSAN ARE MY PARENTS. 275 00:14:07,547 --> 00:14:12,450 YEAH, RIGHT. AND I SUPPOSE THAT'S A MAGICAL TALKING DOG. 276 00:14:12,452 --> 00:14:14,385 YOU ARE CORRECT, SIR. AAH! 277 00:14:14,387 --> 00:14:17,722 SEE? THAT'S YOU AND THAT'S MOM AND THAT'S ME 278 00:14:17,724 --> 00:14:18,957 AND THAT'S YOUR DAUGHTER. 279 00:14:18,959 --> 00:14:20,792 WE'RE A REALLY HAPPY FAMILY, 280 00:14:20,794 --> 00:14:22,694 EXCEPT THAT YOU GROUND ME, A LOT. 281 00:14:22,696 --> 00:14:25,530 UH-HUH, YEAH. LOOK, WHATEVER YOUR NAME IS, 282 00:14:25,532 --> 00:14:27,732 THIS HAS BEEN THE WORST DAY OF MY LIFE, OK? 283 00:14:27,734 --> 00:14:29,868 THE GIRL OF MY DREAMS IS A DRAGON, 284 00:14:29,870 --> 00:14:32,370 THERE'S DOG SLOBBER ON MY PUZZLE GAME, 285 00:14:32,372 --> 00:14:34,939 AND I CAN'T GET MY COLLAR TO STAY UP TO SAVE MY LIFE. 286 00:14:34,941 --> 00:14:37,575 SO IF THIS IS SOME KIND OF SICK JOKE... 287 00:14:37,577 --> 00:14:41,813 DRAGON UP. NOW DO YOU BELIEVE ME? 288 00:14:41,815 --> 00:14:44,616 AAH! [STAMMERS] 289 00:14:44,618 --> 00:14:47,518 COULD THIS DAY GET ANY WORSE? 290 00:14:47,520 --> 00:14:50,421 IT JUST DID, DRAGON. 291 00:14:52,525 --> 00:14:54,926 IT'S YOU. THE HUNTSMAN. 292 00:14:54,928 --> 00:14:56,594 DUDE, WHAT'S WITH THE VOICE? 293 00:14:56,596 --> 00:14:58,963 YOU SOUND LIKE AN ACCORDION STUCK IN A WOOD CHIPPER. 294 00:14:58,965 --> 00:15:03,801 NO ONE MAKES FUN OF MY VOICE. 295 00:15:06,606 --> 00:15:08,573 WHOA! 296 00:15:17,083 --> 00:15:23,588 HAH. AT LAST, I SHALL SLAY MY FIRST DRAGON. 297 00:15:23,590 --> 00:15:25,156 AAH! 298 00:15:25,158 --> 00:15:28,559 WHOA-A-A-A! OOF. 299 00:15:34,668 --> 00:15:36,834 GET USED TO HAVING ME WHIP YOU, HUNTSPUNK, 300 00:15:36,836 --> 00:15:40,605 'CAUSE IN ABOUT 20 YEARS, I'M GONNA BE--WAAH! 301 00:15:42,175 --> 00:15:43,508 WHOA! 302 00:15:43,510 --> 00:15:47,779 ENJOY MY DETONATOR, DRAGON. [BEEPING] 303 00:15:47,781 --> 00:15:51,516 NO WAY AM I FETCHING THAT. HUH? 304 00:15:51,518 --> 00:15:54,485 YAAH! TAKE COVER. 305 00:15:59,592 --> 00:16:02,226 SHOW YOURSELF, DRAGON. 306 00:16:06,800 --> 00:16:10,601 [BOTH COUGHING] 307 00:16:12,739 --> 00:16:16,841 OH, NO, DAD! 308 00:16:19,612 --> 00:16:23,014 NO, NO! THIS IS ALL MY FAULT. 309 00:16:23,016 --> 00:16:26,250 IT'S BECAUSE OF MY LETTER. DAD, WE HAVE TO SAVE HIM. 310 00:16:26,252 --> 00:16:28,486 THERE, THERE. WE WILL DO OUR BEST. 311 00:16:28,488 --> 00:16:32,490 ALTHOUGH, MY DAUGHTER, THERE ARE STILL PLENTY OF FISH IN THE SEA. 312 00:16:32,492 --> 00:16:34,058 DADDY! 313 00:16:34,059 --> 00:16:35,625 OK, OK. I WAS JUST PUTTING IT OUT THERE. 314 00:16:35,628 --> 00:16:38,229 LOOK, THERE'S GOTTA BE SOME WAY WE CAN FIND HIM. 315 00:16:38,231 --> 00:16:41,566 I DIDN'T WANT TO SHOW YOU THIS, BUT, UH...HA HA HA. 316 00:16:41,568 --> 00:16:43,534 I HAVE BEEN USING AN ENCHANTED COMPASS 317 00:16:43,536 --> 00:16:45,703 TO KEEP TRACK OF JONATHAN ON YOUR DATES. 318 00:16:45,705 --> 00:16:48,723 DADDY, HOW COULD YOU? 319 00:16:48,724 --> 00:16:51,742 MY DARLING, I MAY POSSESS ALL THE MAGIC AND STRENGTH OF A GREAT DRAGON WARRIOR, 320 00:16:51,745 --> 00:16:54,012 BUT I AM ALSO A SINGLE DAD. 321 00:16:54,014 --> 00:16:58,282 FOR THE LAST TIME, IF YOU VALUE YOUR LIFE, 322 00:16:58,284 --> 00:17:01,119 YOU WILL TELL ME EVERYTHING YOU KNOW. 323 00:17:01,121 --> 00:17:03,821 I WILL TELL YOU NOTHING! 324 00:17:03,823 --> 00:17:06,924 VERY WELL. 325 00:17:09,629 --> 00:17:11,229 OHH... 326 00:17:11,231 --> 00:17:12,563 [BEAST ROARS] 327 00:17:12,565 --> 00:17:14,699 AAH! I'LL TELL YA EVERYTHING. 328 00:17:14,700 --> 00:17:16,834 IN THE TENTH GRADE, I FILLED MY TEACHER'S TRUNK WITH 3-BEAN SALAD. 329 00:17:16,836 --> 00:17:21,139 IN THE SEVENTH GRADE, I DROVE OUR LAWNMOWER OVER OUR SISTER'S POOL... 330 00:17:21,141 --> 00:17:24,575 AND IN SIXTH GRADE, I TOOK ALL THE MONEY I MADE FOR THE LESS FORTUNATE 331 00:17:24,577 --> 00:17:26,544 AND SPENT IT AT THE ARCADE! 332 00:17:26,546 --> 00:17:28,246 TELL US THE LOCATION OF THE DRAGONS. 333 00:17:28,248 --> 00:17:32,583 WHY PUT YOURSELF IN HARM'S WAY JUST TO PROTECT SOME HIDEOUS MONSTERS? 334 00:17:32,585 --> 00:17:36,154 SEE? THAT'S YOU AND THAT'S MOM AND THAT'S ME 335 00:17:36,156 --> 00:17:41,692 AND THAT'S YOUR DAUGHTER. WE'RE A REALLY HAPPY FAMILY. 336 00:17:41,694 --> 00:17:44,829 THE ONLY MONSTERS I SEE ARE YOU! 337 00:17:44,831 --> 00:17:47,632 CHECK IT. HE'S DEFENDING US. 338 00:17:47,634 --> 00:17:49,100 HE'S SO BRAVE. 339 00:17:49,102 --> 00:17:51,102 MY DAUGHTER, IF AN ORDINARY HUMAN 340 00:17:51,104 --> 00:17:53,271 IS DESTINED TO BE YOUR TRUE LOVE, 341 00:17:53,273 --> 00:17:55,807 I SUPPOSE YOU COULD DO WORSE. 342 00:17:55,809 --> 00:17:59,844 VERY WELL. LET'S BEGIN. 343 00:17:59,846 --> 00:18:01,412 AAH. 344 00:18:01,414 --> 00:18:04,082 DRAGON UP! 345 00:18:11,724 --> 00:18:14,092 [ALL SCREAM] 346 00:18:14,094 --> 00:18:15,860 THAT'S RIGHT, AM DRAGON-- 347 00:18:15,862 --> 00:18:21,265 I MEAN, CAN DRAGS IN THE HIZZOUSE. 348 00:18:25,171 --> 00:18:27,071 LOOKING FOR ME? 349 00:18:27,073 --> 00:18:29,707 GET HIM. 350 00:18:31,244 --> 00:18:33,978 [BEAST ROARS] WHO DARES...? 351 00:18:46,693 --> 00:18:49,060 LOOK OUT, SWEET POTATO! 352 00:18:49,062 --> 00:18:50,361 AAH! 353 00:18:50,363 --> 00:18:53,664 OHH! 354 00:18:57,303 --> 00:18:59,871 SAY GOODBYE, DRAGON. 355 00:19:03,409 --> 00:19:05,276 WHA...? 356 00:19:07,680 --> 00:19:09,814 AAH! 357 00:19:09,816 --> 00:19:11,399 [BEAST ROARS] 358 00:19:11,400 --> 00:19:12,983 OOPS, THAT'S GOTTA HURT WITH THE CLAWING AND PINCHING. 359 00:19:12,986 --> 00:19:16,654 YO, LET'S BLOW THIS CRIB. 360 00:19:16,656 --> 00:19:18,823 [SCREAMING] 361 00:19:22,762 --> 00:19:24,712 [LAUGHING] 362 00:19:24,713 --> 00:19:26,663 OH, PLEASE TELL ME WE CAUGHT THAT ON THE SURVEILLANCE CAMERAS. 363 00:19:26,666 --> 00:19:29,250 SOMEBODY GO GET THE TAPE. 364 00:19:29,251 --> 00:19:31,835 DUDE, DID YOU HEAR HIM? HE WAS, "SAY GOODBYE, DRAGON," 365 00:19:31,838 --> 00:19:35,706 AND HE WAS ALL, "NO! HELP ME! IT HURTS! OW!" 366 00:19:35,708 --> 00:19:38,242 OH, STOP. 367 00:19:38,243 --> 00:19:40,777 DRAGONS--I WILL SLAY EACH AND EVERY ONE OF THEM 368 00:19:40,780 --> 00:19:44,115 IF IT TAKES UNTIL THE END OF TIME. 369 00:19:44,117 --> 00:19:48,052 [YELLS; ECHOES] 370 00:19:49,055 --> 00:19:51,289 UH, WHA-WHAT HAPPENED? 371 00:19:51,291 --> 00:19:53,457 YOU TRIPPED OVER A BOOM BOX AND HIT YOUR HEAD. 372 00:19:53,459 --> 00:19:56,928 WHAT ABOUT THE FREAKOS WHO WERE TORTURING ME? 373 00:19:56,930 --> 00:20:00,064 THEY WANTED INFORMATION ABOUT YOU GUYS BEING DRAGONS. 374 00:20:00,066 --> 00:20:01,999 WE HAD THAT FIGHT, REMEMBER? 375 00:20:02,001 --> 00:20:03,901 DRAGONS? DUDE, SOUNDS LIKE 376 00:20:03,903 --> 00:20:06,170 SOMEBODY'S MP3 FILE'S BEEN CORRUPTED. 377 00:20:06,172 --> 00:20:09,740 MY WHAT? SO SUSAN AND I AREN'T REALLY YOUR PARENTS? 378 00:20:09,742 --> 00:20:15,713 PARENTS? OH, JONATHAN, YOU REALLY MUST'VE HIT YOUR HEAD HARD. 379 00:20:15,715 --> 00:20:17,715 UH, KID, WE GOTTA SCRAM. 380 00:20:17,717 --> 00:20:21,852 WELL, I GOTTA GET BACK TO CANADA. GOOD DAY, EH? 381 00:20:21,854 --> 00:20:26,057 MAY YOUR JOURNEY BE SAFE, BEYONCE TIMBERLAKE. 382 00:20:26,059 --> 00:20:27,959 THANK YOU FOR EVERYTHING. 383 00:20:27,961 --> 00:20:30,161 IF WE CAN EVER RETURN THE FAVOR... 384 00:20:30,163 --> 00:20:33,431 DON'T WORRY, YOU WILL. 385 00:20:33,433 --> 00:20:35,833 SUSAN, LOOK. IT'S HALLEY'S COMET. 386 00:20:35,835 --> 00:20:37,401 I THOUGHT IT WAS PRONOUNCED HALEY? 387 00:20:37,403 --> 00:20:42,240 HALEY. I'VE ALWAYS LIKED THAT NAME. 388 00:20:42,475 --> 00:20:46,777 HEY, G, WHAT'S UP? HOW'S YOUR BACK FEELIN'? 389 00:20:46,779 --> 00:20:48,980 MY BACK? IT'S FINE. WHY DO YOU ASK? 390 00:20:48,982 --> 00:20:52,416 YOU KNOW, YOUR BAD BACK FROM WHEN YOU FELL OFF THE LADDER IN NINETEEN EIGHTY-- 391 00:20:52,418 --> 00:20:55,953 KID, IXNAY ON THE ACKBAY, HUH? 392 00:20:55,955 --> 00:20:59,390 OH, RIGHT. 'CAUSE THAT NEVER-- SO YOU NEVER-- 393 00:20:59,392 --> 00:21:02,827 FU DOG... [SCOLDS IN CHINESE] 394 00:21:02,829 --> 00:21:05,329 YOU HAVE BEEN TIME TRAVELING AGAIN, HAVEN'T YOU? 395 00:21:05,331 --> 00:21:12,503 LOOK, I PROMISE, I WILL NEVER, EVER, EVER DO THIS KIND OF THING EVER AGAIN. 396 00:21:13,139 --> 00:21:15,072 IS THIS A BAD TIME? 397 00:21:15,074 --> 00:21:18,409 HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH. OH, BOY. 398 00:21:18,411 --> 00:21:21,779 MORNING, DAD. MORNING, MOM. MORNING, HALEY. 399 00:21:21,781 --> 00:21:24,382 WOW, SOMEONE'S AWFULLY CHIPPER THIS MORNING. 400 00:21:24,384 --> 00:21:27,485 WHAT CAN I SAY? I'M HAPPY FOR EVERYTHING WE HAVE HERE, 401 00:21:27,487 --> 00:21:29,053 JUST THE WAY IT IS. 402 00:21:29,055 --> 00:21:32,556 YOU KNOW, YOU AND MOM TOGETHER, ME AND HALEY EXISTING. 403 00:21:32,558 --> 00:21:34,759 THAT KIND OF THING. 404 00:21:34,760 --> 00:21:36,961 JAKE, I HOPE YOU DON'T THINK I LIKE PUNISHING YOU. 405 00:21:36,963 --> 00:21:41,532 IT'S JUST...I CAN'T BEAR THE THOUGHT OF SEEING YOU HURT. 406 00:21:41,534 --> 00:21:43,351 I KNOW, DAD. ME, TOO. 407 00:21:43,352 --> 00:21:45,169 YOUR MOTHER AND I TALKED ABOUT YOUR GROUNDING, AND, WELL... 408 00:21:45,171 --> 00:21:48,272 WE'VE DECIDED TO LET YOU OFF WITH A WARNING THIS TIME. 409 00:21:48,274 --> 00:21:50,408 HAVE A GOOD DAY, ALL. 410 00:21:50,410 --> 00:21:51,876 THANKS, MOM. 411 00:21:51,877 --> 00:21:53,343 OF COURSE. I JUST HATE SEEING YOU GET PUNISHED 412 00:21:53,346 --> 00:21:55,813 FOR SOMETHING YOU DIDN'T-- WHAT THE...? 413 00:21:55,815 --> 00:21:59,116 TIME TRAVELING? AND ON A SCHOOL NIGHT? 414 00:21:59,118 --> 00:22:02,219 YOU ARE GROUNDED, YOUNG MAN. NO TV. 415 00:22:02,221 --> 00:22:04,922 NO VIDEO GAMES. 2 WEEKS. 416 00:22:04,924 --> 00:22:06,957 AW, MAN! 417 00:22:08,261 --> 00:22:11,112 HEY, KID, CHECK OUT A FEW OF MY TIME-TRAVELING VACATION PHOTOS. 418 00:22:11,113 --> 00:22:13,964 HERE'S ME REINTRODUCING THE CONCEPT OF A TOGA PARTY TO THE ROMANS. 419 00:22:13,966 --> 00:22:17,201 HERE I'M TELLING BETSY ROSS THAT RED, WHITE AND BLUE 420 00:22:17,203 --> 00:22:19,303 WOULD MAKE A PRETTY COLOR COMBINATION. 421 00:22:19,305 --> 00:22:22,006 AND THIS HERE'S MY CONTRIBUTION TO ART HISTORY. 422 00:22:22,008 --> 00:22:24,208 THE MONA LISA? 423 00:22:24,209 --> 00:22:26,409 YEAH, SHE WAS ALL SMILES UNTIL--[BELCHES] 424 00:22:26,412 --> 00:22:28,813 DUDE, THAT'S MESSED UP. 425 00:22:28,814 --> 00:22:31,215 BLAME IT ON THE 2 DOZEN MEATBALLS I ATE FOR BREAKFAST THAT MORNING.