1 00:00:01,877 --> 00:00:04,838 This is your territory, young dragon... 2 00:00:04,922 --> 00:00:06,465 And you alone are responsible 3 00:00:06,548 --> 00:00:09,718 for the magical creatures living within it. 4 00:00:09,801 --> 00:00:13,055 From the centaur herds of Highbridge Park... 5 00:00:13,138 --> 00:00:18,393 To the floor of the secret leprechaun stock exchange. 6 00:00:18,477 --> 00:00:23,106 From the gargoyle nest on top of the Empire State Building... 7 00:00:23,190 --> 00:00:27,110 To the mermaids of the East River. 8 00:00:27,611 --> 00:00:29,363 Whoo-hoo! 9 00:00:29,446 --> 00:00:32,866 Hey, kid, if you can make it here, you'll make it anywhere. 10 00:00:32,950 --> 00:00:34,451 (LAUGHING) 11 00:00:34,535 --> 00:00:35,744 Ah, no problem. 12 00:00:35,827 --> 00:00:37,037 I am totally on it. 13 00:00:37,120 --> 00:00:38,163 But first, you must master 14 00:00:38,247 --> 00:00:40,999 your dragon training one step at a time. 15 00:00:41,083 --> 00:00:42,084 Even a young falcon 16 00:00:42,167 --> 00:00:44,711 must stand before it can fly. 17 00:00:44,795 --> 00:00:48,215 Check this out, G. Dragon up, yo! 18 00:00:51,885 --> 00:00:55,764 Bow! I'm not only ready to fly, I'm ready to soar! 19 00:00:55,848 --> 00:00:57,224 Represent! 20 00:00:57,307 --> 00:00:58,809 Whoo-hoo! 21 00:00:58,892 --> 00:01:00,102 Yeah! 22 00:01:00,185 --> 00:01:05,190 Bad dudes beware 'cause the American Dragon is in the house! 23 00:01:05,274 --> 00:01:07,442 Yeah! Yeah... 24 00:01:07,526 --> 00:01:09,403 Aah! Unh! 25 00:01:09,486 --> 00:01:11,238 I'm cool. No prob. 26 00:01:11,321 --> 00:01:13,198 Unh! C... C... Could you guys... 27 00:01:13,282 --> 00:01:14,533 A little help down here? 28 00:01:14,616 --> 00:01:15,951 (SIGHS) 29 00:01:16,034 --> 00:01:17,494 (THEME SONG PLAYING) 30 00:01:17,578 --> 00:01:20,497 ♪ He's cool, he's hot like a frozen sun ♪ 31 00:01:20,581 --> 00:01:23,500 ♪ He's young and fast He's the chosen one ♪ 32 00:01:23,584 --> 00:01:26,461 ♪ People, we're not braggin' ♪ 33 00:01:26,545 --> 00:01:30,090 ♪ He's the American Dragon ♪ 34 00:01:30,174 --> 00:01:33,594 ♪ He's gonna stop his enemies with his dragon power ♪ 35 00:01:33,677 --> 00:01:37,306 ♪ Dragon teeth, dragon tail, burnin' dragon fire ♪ 36 00:01:37,389 --> 00:01:38,807 ♪ A real live wire ♪ 37 00:01:38,891 --> 00:01:41,059 ♪ American Dragon ♪ 38 00:01:41,143 --> 00:01:42,311 JAKE: Dragon up! 39 00:01:42,394 --> 00:01:44,354 ♪ American Dragon ♪ 40 00:01:44,438 --> 00:01:47,274 Oh, oh, oh, whoa! 41 00:01:48,275 --> 00:01:50,611 ♪ He's the American Dragon ♪ 42 00:01:50,694 --> 00:01:51,820 Break it down with the dragon. 43 00:01:51,904 --> 00:01:53,822 ♪ His skills are gettin' faster ♪ 44 00:01:53,906 --> 00:01:55,782 ♪ With Grandpa, the master ♪ 45 00:01:55,866 --> 00:01:56,867 ♪ His destiny, what's up, G? ♪ 46 00:01:56,950 --> 00:01:58,952 ♪ It's showtime, baby, for the legacy ♪ 47 00:01:59,036 --> 00:02:00,037 ♪ American Dragon ♪ 48 00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:03,874 ♪ From the "J" to the "A" to the "K" to the "E" ♪ 49 00:02:03,957 --> 00:02:07,461 ♪ I'm the Mack Daddy dragon of the NYC ♪ 50 00:02:07,544 --> 00:02:08,545 Ya heard? 51 00:02:08,629 --> 00:02:11,298 GRANDPA: Jake! Get back to work! 52 00:02:11,381 --> 00:02:13,133 Aw, man. 53 00:02:13,217 --> 00:02:15,219 (GONG DINGS) 54 00:02:17,221 --> 00:02:21,266 We dragons are creatures of immense magical power. 55 00:02:21,350 --> 00:02:23,852 But to unlock your potential, 56 00:02:23,936 --> 00:02:25,312 you must keep training, 57 00:02:25,395 --> 00:02:26,480 and master the fundamentals. 58 00:02:26,563 --> 00:02:28,440 Dragon fire! Dragon teeth! 59 00:02:28,524 --> 00:02:30,484 Dragon tongue! Dragon claws! 60 00:02:30,567 --> 00:02:32,611 Dragon tail! 61 00:02:33,278 --> 00:02:35,405 Ha! Right! Yo, I'm all over it, Grandpa. 62 00:02:35,489 --> 00:02:38,534 And a dragon student must obey his dragon master, 63 00:02:38,617 --> 00:02:41,036 without question or hesitation. 64 00:02:41,119 --> 00:02:43,330 Totally. I'm all about obeying. 65 00:02:43,413 --> 00:02:46,166 Whatever you say, whenever you say it. 66 00:02:46,250 --> 00:02:48,460 (SNIFFING) Oh! Blecch! 67 00:02:48,544 --> 00:02:51,004 Blue cheese with a touch of sweat sock. 68 00:02:51,088 --> 00:02:53,382 It's the Huntsman. I'd know that foot stink anywhere. 69 00:02:53,465 --> 00:02:55,509 The Huntsman? You sure, Fu Dog? 70 00:02:55,592 --> 00:02:57,386 What's he doing here? 71 00:02:57,469 --> 00:02:59,638 Ahh, you tell us, young one. 72 00:02:59,721 --> 00:03:02,349 Huntsman's footprints head north/south 73 00:03:02,432 --> 00:03:05,394 on the night of a full moon. 74 00:03:05,477 --> 00:03:07,354 (WHINNYING) 75 00:03:07,437 --> 00:03:09,439 (GASPS) He's hunting unicorns! 76 00:03:09,523 --> 00:03:12,150 Bada-bingo! Give the kid a prize! 77 00:03:12,234 --> 00:03:15,279 Ah, yes. Unicorn horns. 78 00:03:15,362 --> 00:03:20,367 Always a valuable commodity on the magical black market. 79 00:03:22,452 --> 00:03:23,453 What's going down? 80 00:03:23,537 --> 00:03:25,038 Are we gonna crack open a can of smack daddy 81 00:03:25,122 --> 00:03:27,291 on this Huntsman here or what? 82 00:03:27,374 --> 00:03:29,334 Not we, you. 83 00:03:29,418 --> 00:03:32,129 Me? As in alone? Solo? 84 00:03:32,212 --> 00:03:33,881 I will not be around forever. 85 00:03:33,964 --> 00:03:37,676 It's time you put your dragon training to the test. 86 00:03:37,759 --> 00:03:39,094 Right! Ha! 87 00:03:39,178 --> 00:03:41,388 Put my mad skizz-ills to the test. 88 00:03:41,471 --> 00:03:44,349 I'm all over it. 89 00:03:44,600 --> 00:03:46,268 FU: Hey, hey! Make it good, kid. 90 00:03:46,351 --> 00:03:49,104 I'm calling Ernie and laying 50 biscuits on you. 91 00:03:49,188 --> 00:03:51,565 Hey, Big Ernie! Ho ho! It's Fu! 92 00:03:51,648 --> 00:03:54,193 I need to make a bet. 93 00:03:58,238 --> 00:03:59,239 Now! 94 00:03:59,323 --> 00:04:00,699 Give him dragon fire. 95 00:04:00,782 --> 00:04:04,369 Taste my dragon breath, dirtball. 96 00:04:04,453 --> 00:04:06,663 (GRUNTS) 97 00:04:06,747 --> 00:04:08,624 Incoming! 98 00:04:08,707 --> 00:04:11,168 -Aah! -Aah! 99 00:04:12,294 --> 00:04:14,171 Sorry! My bad, guys! 100 00:04:14,254 --> 00:04:15,589 Whoa! Watch it! 101 00:04:15,672 --> 00:04:18,008 Hot cheeks! Hot cheeks! 102 00:04:18,467 --> 00:04:20,010 Oh, oh, oh, oh! 103 00:04:20,093 --> 00:04:22,221 Ahh... 104 00:04:22,513 --> 00:04:24,097 Dragon. 105 00:04:24,181 --> 00:04:25,224 Huh? 106 00:04:25,307 --> 00:04:27,434 Oh, come on. Dragon up. 107 00:04:27,518 --> 00:04:29,102 Oh! Dragon up! 108 00:04:29,186 --> 00:04:31,396 Oh! Now would be nice! 109 00:04:31,480 --> 00:04:33,273 Say good-bye, dragon! 110 00:04:33,357 --> 00:04:34,650 Whoa! Unh! 111 00:04:34,733 --> 00:04:36,360 Ha ha! Is that all you got, Huntsman? 112 00:04:36,443 --> 00:04:38,654 'Cause I'm about to come over there and... 113 00:04:38,737 --> 00:04:41,281 Hyah! How was that, Huntsmaster? 114 00:04:41,365 --> 00:04:45,202 Very nice, Huntsgirl. Your training has served you well. 115 00:04:45,285 --> 00:04:46,453 Oh... 116 00:04:46,537 --> 00:04:48,205 Hyah! 117 00:04:48,372 --> 00:04:51,124 Come on, now, what's a nice girl like you doing 118 00:04:51,208 --> 00:04:53,043 hunting unicorns? (BELCHES) Oh! 119 00:04:53,126 --> 00:04:54,586 What's a nice guy like you 120 00:04:54,670 --> 00:04:56,421 doing outside in his undies? 121 00:04:56,505 --> 00:04:58,465 Huh? Oh! Well, I... 122 00:04:58,549 --> 00:05:00,175 You have a golden opportunity 123 00:05:00,259 --> 00:05:02,219 to slay your first dragon. 124 00:05:02,302 --> 00:05:03,470 Finish him! 125 00:05:03,554 --> 00:05:05,347 With pleasure. 126 00:05:05,430 --> 00:05:07,266 Aah! 127 00:05:10,269 --> 00:05:14,731 This is not over, dragon! 128 00:05:16,400 --> 00:05:17,442 Ah, tough break, kid. 129 00:05:17,526 --> 00:05:19,152 Almost as bad as when you tangled 130 00:05:19,236 --> 00:05:21,321 with those mountain trolls last week. 131 00:05:21,405 --> 00:05:24,324 Aah! Ow! Ooh! Ow! 132 00:05:24,408 --> 00:05:25,492 (GIGGLING) 133 00:05:25,576 --> 00:05:28,787 Or the week before that, when you took on the giants? 134 00:05:29,496 --> 00:05:32,082 Oh! Oh! 135 00:05:32,165 --> 00:05:34,168 (LAUGHING) Or the week before that, 136 00:05:34,251 --> 00:05:37,713 when those field pixies tossed you a beatin'. 137 00:05:38,463 --> 00:05:40,174 Aah! Oh! Unh! 138 00:05:40,257 --> 00:05:41,592 Young dragon, you must learn 139 00:05:41,675 --> 00:05:45,345 that smack daddy does not come in a can. 140 00:05:45,429 --> 00:05:46,680 Tomorrow, we step up your training. 141 00:05:46,763 --> 00:05:49,141 Be on rooftop right after school. 142 00:05:49,224 --> 00:05:52,561 Ahh, okay. I'll be there, Grandpa. 143 00:05:52,895 --> 00:05:55,439 ...which brings us to the topic of dragons. 144 00:05:55,522 --> 00:05:57,608 Now, if you'll turn to chapter 237 145 00:05:57,691 --> 00:06:00,277 of my groundbreaking yet unpublished 1984 thesis 146 00:06:00,360 --> 00:06:03,780 entitled Mythobiology: a Scientific Study 147 00:06:03,864 --> 00:06:06,366 of the Magical Creatures Among Us, 148 00:06:06,450 --> 00:06:08,410 you'll see that I describe dragons 149 00:06:08,493 --> 00:06:11,371 as an evolutionary offshoot of the dinosaurs. 150 00:06:11,455 --> 00:06:13,498 Thus, what can we conclude 151 00:06:13,582 --> 00:06:16,418 about the size of a dragon's brain? Mr. Long! 152 00:06:16,502 --> 00:06:18,295 Uh, well, um, I would conclude 153 00:06:18,378 --> 00:06:20,339 that dragons have very large brains. 154 00:06:20,422 --> 00:06:23,509 I mean, they'd probably be pretty smart and cool. 155 00:06:23,592 --> 00:06:26,428 Incorrect! We can assume that a dragon's brain 156 00:06:26,512 --> 00:06:28,514 is about... About the size of a pea. 157 00:06:28,597 --> 00:06:30,390 Maybe a walnut. 158 00:06:30,474 --> 00:06:32,392 -But I thought... -Not with the... Quiet. 159 00:06:32,476 --> 00:06:36,188 Write that down, Mr. Long. It's certain to be on your final examination. 160 00:06:36,271 --> 00:06:37,564 Aw, man. 161 00:06:37,648 --> 00:06:39,149 TRIXIE: Hey, yo, Mr. Rot... 162 00:06:39,233 --> 00:06:42,486 -Professor! -Yeah. Professor Rotwood. 163 00:06:42,569 --> 00:06:45,489 This is mythology class up in here, right? 164 00:06:45,572 --> 00:06:46,698 So, how can you know 165 00:06:46,782 --> 00:06:48,116 about the size of a dragon's brain? 166 00:06:48,200 --> 00:06:50,577 I mean, elves, unicorns? 167 00:06:50,661 --> 00:06:53,330 That stuff isn't even really real, yo. 168 00:06:53,413 --> 00:06:55,499 Heh. Yo, yo. Yes, well, you know, 169 00:06:55,582 --> 00:06:59,378 this is certainly the prevailing belief now, isn't it, you know? 170 00:06:59,461 --> 00:07:00,629 However, some great minds 171 00:07:00,712 --> 00:07:03,173 have devoted the bulk of their careers 172 00:07:03,257 --> 00:07:05,843 and indeed their lives to proving otherwise! 173 00:07:05,926 --> 00:07:07,469 Yeah, yeah, yeah, well, you know, of course, 174 00:07:07,553 --> 00:07:09,888 this... This kind of academic courage, you know, 175 00:07:09,972 --> 00:07:12,766 doesn't, you know, come without a price, of course. 176 00:07:12,850 --> 00:07:16,562 Not unlike being ridiculed by one's colleagues! 177 00:07:16,645 --> 00:07:21,900 Or being banished from every respectable educational institution 178 00:07:21,984 --> 00:07:23,318 in the world! 179 00:07:23,402 --> 00:07:25,487 Or even being... Help me... 180 00:07:25,571 --> 00:07:27,322 Or even being reduced to teaching 181 00:07:27,406 --> 00:07:30,450 in the public schools! 182 00:07:30,534 --> 00:07:32,619 (STUDENT COUGHS) 183 00:07:32,703 --> 00:07:33,954 (RING) 184 00:07:34,037 --> 00:07:35,831 Oh, okey-dokey. 185 00:07:35,914 --> 00:07:38,625 Class dismissed. 186 00:07:42,504 --> 00:07:44,298 -TRIXIE: Hey, yo, Jake! -SPUD: Dude. 187 00:07:44,381 --> 00:07:45,799 What's crack-alatin', baby? 188 00:07:45,883 --> 00:07:47,593 Yo, what's up, Trixie? Spud? 189 00:07:47,676 --> 00:07:50,220 We cruisin' over to Washington Park Right about now. 190 00:07:50,304 --> 00:07:52,639 We gonna shred some serious asphalt. 191 00:07:52,723 --> 00:07:56,476 Last time we hit that place, Spud got a concussion. 192 00:07:56,560 --> 00:07:57,603 Ha ha! No way! 193 00:07:57,686 --> 00:07:59,188 That was totally a case 194 00:07:59,271 --> 00:08:02,149 of subcutaneous occipital trauma. 195 00:08:02,232 --> 00:08:04,318 (GIGGLING) No worries, bro. 196 00:08:04,401 --> 00:08:05,569 Yeah, whatever. 197 00:08:05,652 --> 00:08:09,281 So, what up? You in or are you in? 198 00:08:09,364 --> 00:08:10,449 Oh, I wish, Trixie, 199 00:08:10,532 --> 00:08:13,619 but I gotta work at my Grandpa's shop today. 200 00:08:13,702 --> 00:08:17,164 Again? Aw, man. That's, like, the... 201 00:08:17,247 --> 00:08:20,167 1, 2, 4, 23... No... 202 00:08:20,250 --> 00:08:22,669 Eleven-teenth time this week, dude. 203 00:08:22,753 --> 00:08:25,130 What up? It's stressing me out. 204 00:08:25,214 --> 00:08:27,925 Yeah, man, for real! Don't we have some kind of child labor laws 205 00:08:28,008 --> 00:08:29,009 in this city or something? 206 00:08:29,092 --> 00:08:31,261 Yo, maybe next time, guys, aiight? Holla! 207 00:08:31,345 --> 00:08:34,306 Yeah, aiight. Holla at your girl. 208 00:08:34,389 --> 00:08:36,642 Adiós, buddy. 209 00:08:37,100 --> 00:08:38,101 Unh! 210 00:08:38,185 --> 00:08:40,020 Oh, my bad. I'm sorry about the... 211 00:08:40,812 --> 00:08:42,731 -Hi. -Hi yourself. 212 00:08:42,814 --> 00:08:46,068 Hey! That's a really cool dragon tattoo. 213 00:08:46,151 --> 00:08:48,237 ROSE: Actually, it's a birthmark. 214 00:08:48,320 --> 00:08:49,780 (CLEARS THROAT) 215 00:08:49,863 --> 00:08:51,782 I'll, uh, see you around, okay? 216 00:08:51,865 --> 00:08:54,076 Yes! Yes! Most definitely! Yeah. 217 00:08:54,159 --> 00:08:56,161 Oh, well, I mean, you know, 218 00:08:56,245 --> 00:08:58,080 if I have time and you have time, 219 00:08:58,163 --> 00:09:00,916 we can kill some time. Whatever. 220 00:09:03,085 --> 00:09:05,087 ...and 3, 2, 1. 221 00:09:05,170 --> 00:09:06,713 He's late! Goo goo goo goo! 222 00:09:06,797 --> 00:09:09,758 I'm here! I'm here! I'm here! Whoa! 223 00:09:09,842 --> 00:09:12,386 You are late, young dragon. 224 00:09:12,469 --> 00:09:14,763 Say what? By, like, 3 seconds! 225 00:09:14,847 --> 00:09:17,808 3 seconds or 3 hours, late is late! 226 00:09:17,891 --> 00:09:20,018 HUNTSMAN: Ahh, yes. 227 00:09:20,102 --> 00:09:23,397 Do you know what would look magnificent stuffed 228 00:09:23,480 --> 00:09:26,733 and mounted on the wall of the Huntslair? 229 00:09:26,817 --> 00:09:28,861 Let me guess. 230 00:09:29,444 --> 00:09:31,822 Whoa, whoa, whoa! 231 00:09:31,905 --> 00:09:33,115 I'm cool, I'm cool. 232 00:09:33,198 --> 00:09:35,075 A pair of dragon skins? 233 00:09:35,158 --> 00:09:37,286 (LAUGHING MANIACALLY) 234 00:09:37,369 --> 00:09:39,121 (LAUGHS) 235 00:09:43,083 --> 00:09:46,753 GRANDPA: Today, we will begin old school dragon training. 236 00:09:46,837 --> 00:09:49,131 Yo, bring it, G. What are we starting with today, 237 00:09:49,214 --> 00:09:53,260 extreme aerial maneuvers? A little fireball action? 238 00:09:54,011 --> 00:09:55,929 I'm ready to rock over here. 239 00:09:56,013 --> 00:09:57,181 Begin in bathroom. 240 00:09:57,264 --> 00:09:58,765 Say what? 241 00:09:58,849 --> 00:10:02,186 You must clean toilet using circular motion, 242 00:10:02,269 --> 00:10:05,898 first clockwise, then counterclockwise. 243 00:10:05,981 --> 00:10:07,232 Uh, if you say so. 244 00:10:07,316 --> 00:10:09,484 Aah! Not with hand! 245 00:10:09,568 --> 00:10:13,697 You must clean toilet using only dragon tongue. 246 00:10:13,780 --> 00:10:15,199 My tongue? On that? 247 00:10:15,282 --> 00:10:17,910 Ha ha! Nuh-uh, no way, fuh-get about it. 248 00:10:17,993 --> 00:10:19,077 Are you not dragon student? 249 00:10:19,161 --> 00:10:22,414 Did you not pledge to obey dragon master? 250 00:10:22,497 --> 00:10:24,917 I really don't remember every single thing 251 00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:26,251 that we'd agreed upon. 252 00:10:26,335 --> 00:10:28,086 Totally! I am all about obeying. 253 00:10:28,170 --> 00:10:31,131 Whatever you say, whenever you say it. 254 00:10:31,215 --> 00:10:33,133 (GRUNTS) 255 00:10:34,009 --> 00:10:35,802 Aw, man! 256 00:10:35,886 --> 00:10:38,013 You cannot be serious! 257 00:10:38,096 --> 00:10:41,850 Circular motion. First clockwise, then counterclockwise. 258 00:10:41,934 --> 00:10:44,853 JAKE: Ew! Aah! This is nasty. 259 00:10:44,937 --> 00:10:47,397 I'm gonna throw up! Ew... 260 00:10:47,481 --> 00:10:52,444 Hurry up! Grandpa has more old school training waiting. 261 00:10:54,947 --> 00:10:56,782 (INHALES AND BELCHES) 262 00:10:58,909 --> 00:11:00,494 Ew! 263 00:11:02,329 --> 00:11:03,830 (STATIC) 264 00:11:14,007 --> 00:11:16,093 Aha! 265 00:11:20,305 --> 00:11:22,057 (PIGEON SQUAWKING) 266 00:11:22,140 --> 00:11:23,517 Oh! That's foul! 267 00:11:23,600 --> 00:11:24,977 SPUD: Ha ha! Aiight, Trixie! 268 00:11:25,060 --> 00:11:26,770 TRIXIE: Put it down, baby! 269 00:11:26,854 --> 00:11:28,897 -Go, girl! -That's what's up! 270 00:11:28,981 --> 00:11:30,899 (TOILET FLUSHES) 271 00:11:30,983 --> 00:11:32,860 Oh, Jake! I think the toilet's gonna need 272 00:11:32,943 --> 00:11:35,863 a little touch-up. Ha ha ha! 273 00:11:38,657 --> 00:11:41,243 You are done with training for today. 274 00:11:41,326 --> 00:11:42,619 Training? You call this training? 275 00:11:42,703 --> 00:11:44,538 I call it being your house boy. 276 00:11:44,621 --> 00:11:47,082 What's cleaning your toilet and sweeping your floor 277 00:11:47,165 --> 00:11:48,542 have to do with being the American Dragon? 278 00:11:48,625 --> 00:11:52,421 The seed does not question where the wind takes it. 279 00:11:52,504 --> 00:11:55,090 In other words, listen to the old man. Come back tomorrow, 280 00:11:55,174 --> 00:12:00,262 and get ready. Fu Dog's gonna need a deep wrinkle massage. 281 00:12:00,345 --> 00:12:01,889 Whoa. 282 00:12:01,972 --> 00:12:03,473 JAKE: I'm telling you, Mom, 283 00:12:03,557 --> 00:12:06,310 Grandpa has seriously lost it. 284 00:12:06,393 --> 00:12:08,103 Yeah, uh-huh. Haley! 285 00:12:08,187 --> 00:12:10,314 You can chop the vegetables now! 286 00:12:10,397 --> 00:12:14,610 All right! Check out my Japanese chopping-yake technique. 287 00:12:14,693 --> 00:12:17,779 I mean, he's turned dragon training into gag-me training. 288 00:12:17,863 --> 00:12:20,407 Days like today make me wish I could just be 289 00:12:20,490 --> 00:12:22,117 a normal human like Dad. 290 00:12:22,201 --> 00:12:23,202 FATHER: Hey! 291 00:12:23,285 --> 00:12:25,495 (SINGING) ♪ Who's that cow With the halo on her head ♪ 292 00:12:25,579 --> 00:12:26,914 Haley, lose the claws! 293 00:12:26,997 --> 00:12:28,957 ♪ And an udder made of gold ♪ 294 00:12:29,041 --> 00:12:30,459 ♪ 'Cause she's all grain fed ♪ 295 00:12:30,542 --> 00:12:31,877 ♪ Oh, the cow... ♪ 296 00:12:31,960 --> 00:12:33,921 And, uh, I use the term "normal" 297 00:12:34,004 --> 00:12:35,797 very loosely. 298 00:12:35,881 --> 00:12:37,591 ♪ Moo ♪ 299 00:12:37,674 --> 00:12:40,260 Hey, great news, familia. 300 00:12:40,344 --> 00:12:41,637 I just landed... 301 00:12:41,720 --> 00:12:44,556 The Wholesome Heifer account! Huh? Okay. 302 00:12:44,640 --> 00:12:46,266 Wholesome Heifer 303 00:12:46,350 --> 00:12:48,602 is the city's largest organic milk producer. 304 00:12:48,685 --> 00:12:50,062 The head honcho and his wife 305 00:12:50,145 --> 00:12:51,980 are coming over for dinner tomorrow night 306 00:12:52,064 --> 00:12:53,607 to seal the deal! 307 00:12:53,690 --> 00:12:55,984 Congratulations, honey. Mmwah! 308 00:12:56,068 --> 00:12:59,613 Daddy, Daddy, Daddy! Look at the violin concerto I composed at school today. 309 00:12:59,696 --> 00:13:01,949 Oh, peanut, that is so cute. 310 00:13:02,032 --> 00:13:03,867 Uh, Mom, are we ever gonna tell Dad 311 00:13:03,951 --> 00:13:06,119 that he married into a family of magical reptiles? 312 00:13:06,203 --> 00:13:08,288 Well, of course, dear. 313 00:13:08,372 --> 00:13:12,376 It's just that your father's always been so, you know... 314 00:13:12,459 --> 00:13:14,211 I think we need to wait for the right moment. 315 00:13:14,294 --> 00:13:18,131 A time when, uh... Well, uh, a time when... 316 00:13:18,215 --> 00:13:20,634 There's a spider on me! Get it off! Get it off! 317 00:13:20,717 --> 00:13:24,471 Oh. Oh, wait. Oh, it's just a fuzzy. Ha! False alarm. 318 00:13:24,555 --> 00:13:27,891 A time when we think he can handle it. 319 00:13:27,975 --> 00:13:32,020 Unh! Ecch! All I can taste is toilet brush. Ecch! 320 00:13:32,104 --> 00:13:36,108 Listen, Jake? I know this whole thing has been hard on you. 321 00:13:36,191 --> 00:13:37,693 First, you find out you're a dragon... 322 00:13:37,776 --> 00:13:38,986 That's cool. 323 00:13:39,069 --> 00:13:41,363 It was the whole, "By the way, you're responsible 324 00:13:41,446 --> 00:13:44,908 "for protecting an entire magical underworld" that's freaking me out. 325 00:13:44,992 --> 00:13:46,910 Well, that's why it's so important for you 326 00:13:46,994 --> 00:13:48,495 to master your dragon powers. 327 00:13:48,579 --> 00:13:51,081 Believe me, I know your grandfather can be 328 00:13:51,164 --> 00:13:52,249 a bit eccentric, 329 00:13:52,332 --> 00:13:55,419 but you just have to trust him, okay? 330 00:13:55,502 --> 00:13:57,296 (SCHOOL BELL RINGS) 331 00:13:58,755 --> 00:14:02,926 ♪ When I think of all The times I fell in love ♪ 332 00:14:03,010 --> 00:14:05,137 ♪ When I think of all the girls ♪ 333 00:14:05,220 --> 00:14:06,638 ♪ I was dreaming of ♪ 334 00:14:06,722 --> 00:14:08,557 ♪ When I think of all the years ♪ 335 00:14:08,640 --> 00:14:11,560 ♪ That are to come ♪ 336 00:14:11,643 --> 00:14:13,645 ♪ I love you better ♪ 337 00:14:13,729 --> 00:14:15,022 ♪ When I... ♪ 338 00:14:15,105 --> 00:14:16,148 -Hey, yo, Jake! -Huh? 339 00:14:16,231 --> 00:14:17,983 Wake up, dawg! Don't even tell me 340 00:14:18,066 --> 00:14:19,943 you're still crushing on that Rhodes girl. 341 00:14:20,027 --> 00:14:21,236 She's so far out of your league, 342 00:14:21,320 --> 00:14:22,738 you don't even know it. 343 00:14:22,821 --> 00:14:25,407 Dude, she's like Tiger burning the 18th at Pebble Beach, 344 00:14:25,490 --> 00:14:27,576 and you're like 9-putting the windmill 345 00:14:27,659 --> 00:14:29,578 at Coney Island mini-golf. 346 00:14:29,661 --> 00:14:31,413 Man, forget her. We got serious business. 347 00:14:31,496 --> 00:14:34,541 They just reopened the 14th Street skate park! 348 00:14:34,625 --> 00:14:36,084 BOTH: We gonna hit that! 349 00:14:36,168 --> 00:14:37,669 Oh, sounds sweet, Trix, 350 00:14:37,753 --> 00:14:39,630 but, you know, I gotta... 351 00:14:39,713 --> 00:14:43,050 Dude! No! Not working in the shop again! 352 00:14:43,133 --> 00:14:44,968 That's, like, the... 353 00:14:45,052 --> 00:14:46,345 1, 2, 4... 354 00:14:46,428 --> 00:14:48,222 Wake up, Jake! that old dude 355 00:14:48,305 --> 00:14:50,641 is, like, stealing your youth, man. 356 00:14:50,724 --> 00:14:52,100 (INHALES) 357 00:14:52,184 --> 00:14:54,603 I... I can't do it, Trix. Sorry. 358 00:14:54,686 --> 00:14:59,441 Aiight. But I'm telling you, Jake, you're missing out here. 359 00:14:59,691 --> 00:15:02,277 Sign here. 360 00:15:03,362 --> 00:15:04,613 Hurry up and get to training! 361 00:15:04,696 --> 00:15:06,615 Must use dragon teeth to scoop sludge 362 00:15:06,698 --> 00:15:09,243 out of Grandpa's rain gutter! 363 00:15:11,078 --> 00:15:12,704 Oh... 364 00:15:12,788 --> 00:15:14,331 Yo, Trixie, Spud! 365 00:15:14,414 --> 00:15:15,541 Wait up, guys! 366 00:15:15,624 --> 00:15:18,126 Uh, yeah. Jake is one hour late for training. 367 00:15:18,210 --> 00:15:21,588 I got a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach. 368 00:15:21,672 --> 00:15:23,215 Oh, you're telling me. 369 00:15:23,298 --> 00:15:24,758 But that's what we get for eating lunch 370 00:15:24,842 --> 00:15:28,053 at a place called the Chimichanga Chuckwagon. 371 00:15:28,136 --> 00:15:31,306 Oh! Hold down the fort, Pops, 372 00:15:31,390 --> 00:15:34,351 'cause nature's calling 911! 373 00:15:34,434 --> 00:15:35,644 Aye-yi-yi-yi-yi... 374 00:15:35,727 --> 00:15:37,479 Jake, where are you? 375 00:15:37,563 --> 00:15:40,232 Something must be wrong. 376 00:15:40,732 --> 00:15:42,234 How right you are. 377 00:15:42,317 --> 00:15:44,528 Dragon, we meet again. 378 00:15:44,611 --> 00:15:48,448 Ho! It is always a pleasure to defeat you! 379 00:15:48,532 --> 00:15:50,284 Hyah! 380 00:15:50,367 --> 00:15:52,411 Whoa! 381 00:16:04,506 --> 00:16:06,300 Unh! 382 00:16:06,383 --> 00:16:08,135 What? 383 00:16:09,761 --> 00:16:12,514 (GRUNTING) 384 00:16:13,348 --> 00:16:16,643 Forget it, old man. That net is pure sphinx hair. 385 00:16:16,727 --> 00:16:18,187 Oh... 386 00:16:18,270 --> 00:16:21,190 Well, one dragon down, 387 00:16:21,273 --> 00:16:22,274 one to go. 388 00:16:22,357 --> 00:16:25,110 (LAUGHING MANIACALLY) 389 00:16:30,449 --> 00:16:33,660 Okay, Fu Dog, just keep quiet. 390 00:16:33,744 --> 00:16:36,371 They'll never know you're in here. 391 00:16:36,455 --> 00:16:38,123 HUNTSGIRL: Who's in there? Open up! 392 00:16:38,207 --> 00:16:41,210 I really gotta stop talking to myself. 393 00:16:41,293 --> 00:16:42,836 (RATTLING) 394 00:16:42,920 --> 00:16:44,671 Here goes nothing. 395 00:16:44,755 --> 00:16:46,173 (SPLASH) 396 00:16:46,256 --> 00:16:48,467 Aah... 397 00:16:50,802 --> 00:16:52,179 (HORN HONKS) 398 00:16:52,262 --> 00:16:53,722 Yeah! Yeah! 399 00:16:53,805 --> 00:16:55,474 This is only like the best day ever! 400 00:16:55,557 --> 00:16:56,725 Ha ha! Whoop! 401 00:16:56,808 --> 00:16:59,478 Ah, this is the worst day ever! 402 00:16:59,561 --> 00:17:01,647 Lost in a sewer, no cell service. 403 00:17:01,730 --> 00:17:03,065 How come Lassie always made 404 00:17:03,148 --> 00:17:05,442 this getting help stuff look so glamorous. 405 00:17:05,526 --> 00:17:09,905 Who dares to enter the lair of the one-eyed sewer troll? 406 00:17:09,988 --> 00:17:13,742 Easy there, tiger. I'm just... 407 00:17:13,825 --> 00:17:16,161 Stanlifkowski? Is that you? 408 00:17:16,245 --> 00:17:18,205 Fu-ster? Hey! 409 00:17:18,288 --> 00:17:19,706 You're a sight for sore eye. 410 00:17:19,790 --> 00:17:20,916 What's it been, 2-300 years? 411 00:17:20,999 --> 00:17:22,793 What brings you down here? 412 00:17:22,876 --> 00:17:25,838 Serious trouble, Stan. I gotta get to the East Village pronto. 413 00:17:25,921 --> 00:17:28,173 Say no more. I know a shortcut under the zoo. 414 00:17:28,257 --> 00:17:30,884 Ah, more sewer. 415 00:17:31,593 --> 00:17:33,220 Oh, Jake, there you are. Hurry and wash up. 416 00:17:33,303 --> 00:17:34,721 Dad's clients are already here. 417 00:17:34,805 --> 00:17:37,808 Uh, Haley, a little help, honey? 418 00:17:39,977 --> 00:17:43,105 Who's ready for mushroom caps? 419 00:17:43,188 --> 00:17:45,649 -(GRUNTS) -Fu? Yo, dawg, 420 00:17:45,732 --> 00:17:47,109 we do have a doggie door. 421 00:17:47,192 --> 00:17:48,193 Kid, where were you? 422 00:17:48,277 --> 00:17:49,695 Fu, I don't even want to hear it. 423 00:17:49,778 --> 00:17:51,280 Grandpa must be buggin' if he thinks he's gonna 424 00:17:51,363 --> 00:17:52,656 make me clean his whole house with... 425 00:17:52,739 --> 00:17:55,492 You don't understand! You left me and Gramps 426 00:17:55,576 --> 00:17:57,953 waiting for you on the roof. We were sitting ducks out there. 427 00:17:58,036 --> 00:18:00,956 -When the Huntsman showed up... -The Huntsman? Where's Grandpa now. 428 00:18:01,039 --> 00:18:03,959 Look, long story short, It ain't looking good for the old man. 429 00:18:04,042 --> 00:18:05,544 This is all my fault. 430 00:18:05,627 --> 00:18:06,795 We gotta go get help. 431 00:18:06,879 --> 00:18:08,463 No! I've gotta do this. 432 00:18:08,547 --> 00:18:10,966 Uh, look, no offense, kid, but we don't got time for no dress rehearsal. 433 00:18:11,049 --> 00:18:13,969 It's showtime! And you haven't even mastered 434 00:18:14,052 --> 00:18:15,679 going full dragon yet. 435 00:18:15,762 --> 00:18:17,890 Watch me. 436 00:18:20,100 --> 00:18:22,019 Dragon up! 437 00:18:22,102 --> 00:18:25,689 ♪ Drag-drag-drag-drag-dragon up ♪ 438 00:18:30,986 --> 00:18:32,237 Hey! I did it! 439 00:18:32,321 --> 00:18:35,782 Check me out! I'm the American Dragon! 440 00:18:35,866 --> 00:18:38,994 -(GROWLS) -Okay, let's fly, kid! 441 00:18:39,077 --> 00:18:40,829 Uh, you can fly, can't you? 442 00:18:40,913 --> 00:18:43,916 So, as you can see, we're just your normal, 443 00:18:43,999 --> 00:18:47,252 wholesome, milk-drinking family. Whoopsie! 444 00:18:47,336 --> 00:18:50,214 (JAKE AND FU SCREAMING) 445 00:18:50,297 --> 00:18:51,632 (CRASH) 446 00:18:51,715 --> 00:18:54,593 So, who'd like salad? 447 00:18:54,676 --> 00:18:57,679 I'll ask you one last time, old man. 448 00:18:57,763 --> 00:19:00,766 Where is the American Dragon? 449 00:19:00,849 --> 00:19:04,228 Right under your nose, dude! I'm like a booger that way. Ha! 450 00:19:04,311 --> 00:19:07,648 Wait. That didn't come out right. 451 00:19:07,940 --> 00:19:11,693 Allow me. I have unfinished business with this dragon. 452 00:19:11,777 --> 00:19:13,946 Hyah! 453 00:19:14,780 --> 00:19:16,114 (GRUNTING) 454 00:19:17,908 --> 00:19:20,202 -Hyah! -Whoa! 455 00:19:20,285 --> 00:19:22,829 Ow! Ow! Ow! Stop it! 456 00:19:22,913 --> 00:19:24,706 Yo, Big Ernie! Yeah, it's Fu. 457 00:19:24,790 --> 00:19:26,333 I want to lay down some cookies on a bet. 458 00:19:26,416 --> 00:19:28,710 -Hey, get off! -Hey, what, are we strangers? 459 00:19:28,794 --> 00:19:31,171 You know I'm good for it. 460 00:19:31,255 --> 00:19:33,257 Hah! 461 00:19:33,340 --> 00:19:35,801 Hah! Hyah! 462 00:19:38,720 --> 00:19:41,723 Try my fastball! 463 00:19:44,768 --> 00:19:45,769 No! Oh! 464 00:19:45,853 --> 00:19:47,938 Enough! American Dragon, 465 00:19:48,021 --> 00:19:51,942 prepare to become a pair of boots! 466 00:19:52,025 --> 00:19:54,778 Young one! Clean toilet bowl! 467 00:19:54,862 --> 00:19:58,073 (THINKING) First clockwise, then counterclockwise. 468 00:19:58,156 --> 00:20:00,826 What? How did he... Unh! 469 00:20:00,909 --> 00:20:02,953 Hey! It worked! Ha ha! 470 00:20:03,036 --> 00:20:04,079 Who the man now, Huntsman? 471 00:20:04,162 --> 00:20:06,415 Huh, Hunts-punk? Yeah, you want some? 472 00:20:06,498 --> 00:20:08,709 There's some more where that came from. 473 00:20:08,792 --> 00:20:11,712 -Hyah! -Young one! Sweep floor! 474 00:20:11,795 --> 00:20:14,298 -Aah! -Ernie, Ernie! I changed my mind! 475 00:20:14,381 --> 00:20:17,885 Put all my biscuits on the kid! Yeah, that's right, the whole thing! 476 00:20:17,968 --> 00:20:19,761 -Unh! -Unh! Hey! 477 00:20:19,845 --> 00:20:22,306 Check you out. You're good, Huntsgirl. 478 00:20:22,389 --> 00:20:25,225 -Hah! -Unh! 479 00:20:25,309 --> 00:20:27,060 Hyah! Unh! 480 00:20:27,144 --> 00:20:28,228 Ooh, you're really good. 481 00:20:28,312 --> 00:20:31,106 You're not so bad yourself, dragon boy. 482 00:20:31,190 --> 00:20:33,192 (GRUNTING) 483 00:20:35,152 --> 00:20:36,987 Hey! 484 00:20:37,321 --> 00:20:39,323 -Kid! Behind you! -Huh? 485 00:20:39,406 --> 00:20:40,991 Unh! 486 00:20:42,034 --> 00:20:43,160 (GRUNTS) 487 00:20:43,243 --> 00:20:44,786 (FARTS) 488 00:20:44,870 --> 00:20:46,288 Aah! 489 00:20:46,371 --> 00:20:48,874 Whah! 490 00:20:51,418 --> 00:20:53,754 -We'll be back! -And I'll be ready. 491 00:20:53,837 --> 00:20:56,757 Uh, kid, you got a little problem downstairs. 492 00:20:56,840 --> 00:20:59,343 Aw, man! 493 00:21:03,514 --> 00:21:04,681 I knew you could do it, kid. 494 00:21:04,765 --> 00:21:07,142 I didn't doubt you for a second. 495 00:21:07,226 --> 00:21:08,393 Okay, I did, but that's 496 00:21:08,477 --> 00:21:09,728 why you love me, right? Come on. 497 00:21:09,811 --> 00:21:13,273 Well done, young dragon. But word to the wise, 498 00:21:13,357 --> 00:21:16,068 it is not good idea to flirt with mortal enemies. 499 00:21:16,151 --> 00:21:19,238 Trust Grandpa. He's been there. 500 00:21:19,321 --> 00:21:21,073 Even a mortal enemy that fine? 501 00:21:21,156 --> 00:21:22,241 Come on, Gramps. 502 00:21:22,324 --> 00:21:23,909 Many battles lie ahead. 503 00:21:23,992 --> 00:21:26,161 We pick training up tomorrow, right after school! 504 00:21:26,245 --> 00:21:28,163 I'll be there, Grandpa, right on time. 505 00:21:28,247 --> 00:21:30,832 I'm sorry I doubted you. 506 00:21:30,916 --> 00:21:33,460 Come. It's late. Fu Dog and I walk you home. 507 00:21:34,378 --> 00:21:35,712 Ahh. Okay, so I get the whole 508 00:21:35,796 --> 00:21:37,798 cleaning the toilet with the tongue thing now. 509 00:21:37,881 --> 00:21:39,883 No problem. Very useful stuff. 510 00:21:39,967 --> 00:21:42,135 -Disgusting, but useful. -Right. 511 00:21:42,219 --> 00:21:43,846 And that whole sweeping the floor with the tail thing? 512 00:21:43,929 --> 00:21:46,849 I see how that's gonna come in handy, too. 513 00:21:46,932 --> 00:21:48,475 -Mm-hmm. -But what about the part 514 00:21:48,559 --> 00:21:50,185 where I did all your laundry? I mean, you had me scrubbing 515 00:21:50,269 --> 00:21:53,021 all your nasty socks and drawers. Ecch! What's up with that? 516 00:21:53,105 --> 00:21:56,358 What's up was Grandpa needed his laundry done. 517 00:21:56,441 --> 00:22:00,195 FU: And tomorrow, you get to do mine. (LAUGHING) 518 00:22:00,279 --> 00:22:03,448 JAKE: But... But I just... Aw, man!