1 00:00:02,942 --> 00:00:05,858 I can't keep it together, Dr. Venture. 2 00:00:06,067 --> 00:00:08,942 I'm sorry about the TVC15. 3 00:00:09,067 --> 00:00:11,025 Tom, I'm not worried about that tin can. 4 00:00:11,108 --> 00:00:12,275 I'm worried about you. 5 00:00:12,358 --> 00:00:14,775 You're not dying on me, and that's an order. 6 00:00:14,983 --> 00:00:17,150 What's going on, Pop? 7 00:00:17,275 --> 00:00:19,608 Everything is fine, son. You're having a nightmare. 8 00:00:19,733 --> 00:00:23,733 Kano! Take Rusty downstairs and give him some warm milk. 9 00:00:24,858 --> 00:00:27,525 I've got a message for the action man. 10 00:00:27,692 --> 00:00:29,317 He's listening, Tom. Go ahead. 11 00:00:29,442 --> 00:00:30,733 I'm happy. 12 00:00:31,067 --> 00:00:33,400 Hope you're happy, too. 13 00:00:34,067 --> 00:00:36,150 I've loved all I needed to love. 14 00:00:37,275 --> 00:00:39,025 Don't talk like that, Tom. 15 00:00:39,150 --> 00:00:40,900 You're gonna make it. Fight it! 16 00:00:41,025 --> 00:00:43,733 I'm feeling very still... 17 00:00:44,233 --> 00:00:49,150 and I think my spaceship knows which way to go. 18 00:00:50,025 --> 00:00:52,608 Tell my wife I love her very much. 19 00:00:52,733 --> 00:00:53,858 She knows! 20 00:00:54,567 --> 00:00:57,192 Ground control to Major Tom. Your circuit's dead. 21 00:00:57,358 --> 00:01:00,317 There's something wrong. Can you hear me, Major Tom? 22 00:01:00,483 --> 00:01:03,400 Can you hear me? Major Tom! 23 00:01:07,942 --> 00:01:09,025 Ashes... 24 00:01:10,192 --> 00:01:11,567 to ashes. 25 00:01:12,733 --> 00:01:13,608 One more, Pop. 26 00:01:13,775 --> 00:01:15,858 Need one with me next to the meta-sonic locator? 27 00:01:15,983 --> 00:01:17,983 No. I need one where your suit isn't riding up. 28 00:01:18,108 --> 00:01:19,775 Well, what do you want? It's terry cloth. 29 00:01:20,025 --> 00:01:21,608 It acts like a towel. 30 00:02:12,567 --> 00:02:14,692 Super bad idea, Doc. 31 00:02:14,817 --> 00:02:17,317 You've never taken a night dive before... 32 00:02:17,442 --> 00:02:20,525 or any dive. 33 00:02:20,650 --> 00:02:21,858 Think about it, Brock. 34 00:02:22,025 --> 00:02:26,025 There's fat greenbacks to be made on that flying saucer my dad lost here. 35 00:02:26,150 --> 00:02:27,525 He never patented it. 36 00:02:27,692 --> 00:02:29,567 One flyboy goes boom... 37 00:02:29,650 --> 00:02:32,525 and he scrapped the whole project out of respect for the dead. 38 00:02:32,692 --> 00:02:35,192 It's just sitting down there under eight hundred meters... 39 00:02:35,317 --> 00:02:37,192 of pitch-black liquid funeral. 40 00:02:37,317 --> 00:02:38,650 Wait. I need this. 41 00:02:38,900 --> 00:02:42,317 Um... eight hundred meters of black liquid funeral... 42 00:02:42,442 --> 00:02:44,358 lies between me and... no. Wait. 43 00:02:44,442 --> 00:02:47,275 Eight hundred meters of cold embalming fluid... 44 00:02:47,358 --> 00:02:50,983 lies between me and my sunken scientific trust fund. 45 00:02:51,233 --> 00:02:53,692 Dean, I am now testing the two-way. 46 00:02:53,858 --> 00:02:55,442 Can you read me? Over. 47 00:02:55,567 --> 00:02:56,650 I sure can, Pop. 48 00:02:56,775 --> 00:02:58,733 I read you loud and clear. 49 00:02:58,942 --> 00:02:59,858 Dean? 50 00:02:59,983 --> 00:03:01,608 Oh. Over. 51 00:03:02,483 --> 00:03:08,150 The meta-sonic locator has been affixed and I am "go" for the mission. Over. 52 00:03:11,858 --> 00:03:13,025 Journal entry one. 53 00:03:13,275 --> 00:03:16,608 As my loyal family and bodyguard lower me toward the indifferent ocean... 54 00:03:16,733 --> 00:03:20,317 One cannot help but think of a hangman's noose swinging like... 55 00:03:20,608 --> 00:03:22,025 Hank, what are you doing? 56 00:03:22,192 --> 00:03:24,442 Sorry, Dad. These controls are a little sticky. 57 00:03:24,525 --> 00:03:27,233 I mean, we haven't done this since... ever. 58 00:03:27,358 --> 00:03:29,525 Well, just try to be a little more gentle, please. 59 00:03:29,650 --> 00:03:31,067 I'm already starting to... 60 00:03:33,067 --> 00:03:35,567 I'm in, and I totally bashed my head. 61 00:03:36,650 --> 00:03:39,650 Beginning my descent into... oh, I should record this. 62 00:03:40,858 --> 00:03:43,983 The Bermuda Triangle... ocean of mystery. 63 00:03:44,275 --> 00:03:48,733 Many have come to her before me seeking... stuff... 64 00:03:49,150 --> 00:03:51,442 never to be seen again. 65 00:03:51,942 --> 00:03:54,317 Dad is super serious all of a sudden. 66 00:03:54,775 --> 00:03:57,275 Do you think he's really in as much danger as he says? 67 00:03:57,442 --> 00:03:58,817 Oh, yeah. He's screwed. 68 00:03:59,025 --> 00:04:02,608 I give him about an hour before he panics and begs us to haul him up. 69 00:04:02,733 --> 00:04:05,358 OK, guys. I can hear all of this. 70 00:04:06,108 --> 00:04:07,983 Journal entry 29. 71 00:04:08,358 --> 00:04:10,942 I am about to switch on the meta-sonic locator... 72 00:04:11,150 --> 00:04:12,650 a device of my own design... 73 00:04:12,775 --> 00:04:16,775 that generates experimental hypersonic sound waves so extra-special... 74 00:04:16,942 --> 00:04:21,442 they not only vibrate the water, they vibrate time. 75 00:04:22,358 --> 00:04:23,983 Ingenious, I know. 76 00:04:26,483 --> 00:04:29,147 - Brock. Come in, Brock. - Yeah. 77 00:04:29,483 --> 00:04:32,192 - You had enough yet? - What? No! Stop that. 78 00:04:32,317 --> 00:04:33,775 What is your status topside? 79 00:04:33,900 --> 00:04:34,900 Yeah. It's fine. 80 00:04:35,067 --> 00:04:36,442 Boys are finally asleep. 81 00:04:36,567 --> 00:04:39,525 Think Dean might have a bladder infection or something. 82 00:04:39,650 --> 00:04:42,942 He had to get up and pee, like, five times. 83 00:04:45,483 --> 00:04:46,608 No way. 84 00:04:47,150 --> 00:04:48,150 Hold on, Doc. 85 00:04:48,275 --> 00:04:51,025 I think I see something that makes no sense. 86 00:04:51,358 --> 00:04:52,317 Better check it out. 87 00:04:52,442 --> 00:04:54,567 OK, but I was just gonna turn on my machine. 88 00:04:54,775 --> 00:04:57,525 I thought it'd be cool for my journal if, like, your voice was in the background... 89 00:04:57,608 --> 00:05:00,358 you know, saying impressive danger stuff. 90 00:05:01,567 --> 00:05:03,525 Dean. Dean, wake up. 91 00:05:03,817 --> 00:05:05,233 I think something's going on. 92 00:05:05,567 --> 00:05:08,817 Brock's gone, and I just heard Dad say something about danger stuff. 93 00:05:08,942 --> 00:05:09,817 So what? 94 00:05:09,900 --> 00:05:11,983 Sew buttons. I'm gonna check it out. 95 00:05:12,192 --> 00:05:13,317 Plus, I have to take a leak. 96 00:05:13,442 --> 00:05:14,400 Do it off the heliport. 97 00:05:14,525 --> 00:05:15,817 It makes this awesome arc. 98 00:05:15,942 --> 00:05:17,942 Cool. Be right back. 99 00:05:31,358 --> 00:05:33,025 Oh, damn it. 100 00:05:37,983 --> 00:05:40,358 Brock! Pirates on the X-2! 101 00:05:40,483 --> 00:05:41,525 Smooth, Hank. 102 00:05:42,400 --> 00:05:45,650 I'm on it. Now keep quiet and don't move till I tell you... 103 00:05:45,775 --> 00:05:49,483 - no matter what you see. - Brock, if pirates really exist... 104 00:05:49,608 --> 00:05:53,067 that means Santa Claus and the tooth fairy can even be real, right? 105 00:05:53,275 --> 00:05:54,650 It's like all bets are off. 106 00:05:54,733 --> 00:05:57,525 Hank, nobody ever said pirates don't exist. 107 00:05:57,692 --> 00:06:00,233 So you agree with me that this is impossible. 108 00:06:03,483 --> 00:06:05,692 Ghost pirates! 109 00:06:07,733 --> 00:06:10,983 Leave this ship at once. 110 00:06:16,983 --> 00:06:18,400 Holy crap. He's getting his ass kicked. 111 00:06:18,567 --> 00:06:19,476 Let's go save him. 112 00:06:19,501 --> 00:06:22,567 You crazy? My sword's made of cardboard. 113 00:06:24,900 --> 00:06:26,108 Enough! 114 00:06:26,608 --> 00:06:29,817 Get off that man before he kills all of you. 115 00:06:30,150 --> 00:06:33,983 I'm sure he doesn't want to see what his child is made of. 116 00:06:34,275 --> 00:06:38,108 I mean, really what he's made of, not like a test of his mettle. 117 00:06:38,233 --> 00:06:39,861 I mean, I'm gonna spill his... 118 00:06:39,886 --> 00:06:41,067 Yeah. Got it the first time. 119 00:06:41,192 --> 00:06:44,608 Silence! Your insolence will not be tolerated... 120 00:06:45,358 --> 00:06:46,400 again. 121 00:06:46,983 --> 00:06:48,233 Hey, is that guy dead? 122 00:06:48,400 --> 00:06:49,858 Yeah, probably. 123 00:06:49,983 --> 00:06:52,192 Come on. Was that necessary? Really. 124 00:06:52,358 --> 00:06:57,983 Your scheme was very clever, very clever indeed, but he's no ghost. 125 00:06:58,067 --> 00:07:00,775 Oh, you think, genius? What tipped you off? 126 00:07:00,900 --> 00:07:03,442 Was it the huge zipper? Maybe the rubber mask? 127 00:07:03,733 --> 00:07:05,817 But you had to kill him anyway. 128 00:07:05,942 --> 00:07:07,567 If you played by the rules... 129 00:07:07,733 --> 00:07:09,692 the ghost pirate rules... 130 00:07:09,817 --> 00:07:12,567 and just ran away, none of this would be happening. 131 00:07:12,733 --> 00:07:15,400 But no. You had to go nuts and kill a guy. 132 00:07:15,733 --> 00:07:17,442 Take him to the brig! 133 00:07:18,483 --> 00:07:20,275 I'm keeping the boy with me. 134 00:07:20,608 --> 00:07:24,108 If you try anything funny, your son dies. 135 00:07:24,442 --> 00:07:26,733 Uh, Captain? 136 00:07:26,858 --> 00:07:28,275 Do we not need this now? 137 00:07:28,775 --> 00:07:32,733 Fine! But without the fog, what am I gonna project the sea monster on? 138 00:07:36,275 --> 00:07:38,567 Like trying to walk around inside a giant fat kid. 139 00:07:38,817 --> 00:07:40,483 Journal entry 36. 140 00:07:40,692 --> 00:07:41,650 I don't get it. 141 00:07:41,817 --> 00:07:44,650 The meta-sonic locator should've rolled back the curtain of time... 142 00:07:44,775 --> 00:07:47,442 and revealed my dad's flying metal failure by now. 143 00:07:47,608 --> 00:07:49,150 No, wait. That's crap. 144 00:07:50,900 --> 00:07:52,692 Journal entry 36. 145 00:07:52,983 --> 00:07:56,150 The meta-sonic locator, though performing admirably... 146 00:07:56,400 --> 00:08:02,108 begs his master to increase the volume, a bidding his master gladly complies with. 147 00:08:14,400 --> 00:08:19,400 I seem to have stepped into some sort of undersea chewing gum. 148 00:08:19,733 --> 00:08:21,067 Because of this... 149 00:08:21,442 --> 00:08:22,692 I can't move. 150 00:08:22,817 --> 00:08:24,025 Oh, boy. This can't be good. 151 00:08:24,108 --> 00:08:27,358 Abort! Brock! Come in, Brock! 152 00:08:28,858 --> 00:08:30,358 Hank. Come in, Hank. 153 00:08:30,692 --> 00:08:32,067 I'm here. Where are you? 154 00:08:32,192 --> 00:08:34,567 Are you being keelhauled? Have they removed your fingernails? 155 00:08:34,733 --> 00:08:36,358 Hank, please. I need your help. 156 00:08:36,567 --> 00:08:38,900 - Really? - Yes, really. Where are you? 157 00:08:39,025 --> 00:08:41,275 I'm near the heliport at the stern of the X-2. 158 00:08:41,442 --> 00:08:44,400 It's dicey, but I could probably rescue you if you give me your coordinates. 159 00:08:44,483 --> 00:08:45,942 Oh, Hank. 160 00:08:46,108 --> 00:08:51,567 If there was ever a time in your life I needed you not to be Hank, it's now. 161 00:08:51,775 --> 00:08:53,442 - Sorry, Brock. - Forget about it. 162 00:08:53,567 --> 00:08:57,775 All right. You have to be my hands. 163 00:08:58,275 --> 00:08:59,442 I'll talk you through it. 164 00:08:59,567 --> 00:09:00,983 - Brock? - What? 165 00:09:01,150 --> 00:09:03,650 This could be the single greatest moment of my life. 166 00:09:03,733 --> 00:09:04,817 Focus, Hank. 167 00:09:05,108 --> 00:09:07,192 Whatever you do, don't light a cigarette. 168 00:09:07,358 --> 00:09:09,858 A good sniper can see a hot cherry for miles. 169 00:09:09,983 --> 00:09:11,067 Brock, I don't smoke. 170 00:09:11,192 --> 00:09:13,317 Good. Now's a lousy time to start. 171 00:09:14,692 --> 00:09:16,817 We're not carrying gold or anything like that. 172 00:09:16,983 --> 00:09:20,067 I don't want your treasure, kid. I don't even want your wallet. 173 00:09:20,400 --> 00:09:21,983 I just want your boat. 174 00:09:22,275 --> 00:09:24,858 Now just tell me where the keys are. 175 00:09:25,067 --> 00:09:26,900 You have a pirate ship. 176 00:09:28,192 --> 00:09:30,942 Sit on my lap, son. It's story time. 177 00:09:31,108 --> 00:09:32,567 I don't want to sit in your lap. 178 00:09:32,692 --> 00:09:34,858 Fine. Don't. I'll tell you anyway. 179 00:09:35,067 --> 00:09:39,192 That pirate ship out there hasn't moved an inch in, like, forever. 180 00:09:39,567 --> 00:09:42,067 We've been stuck in that disgusting sargassum... 181 00:09:42,192 --> 00:09:43,858 which, by the way, no matter how you cook it... 182 00:09:44,025 --> 00:09:45,900 still tastes like hot sargassum... 183 00:09:46,108 --> 00:09:47,442 It's been, like, ten years. 184 00:09:47,567 --> 00:09:49,692 - Wow! - Yeah, wow. Oh, sure. 185 00:09:49,817 --> 00:09:51,150 In the beginning, it's lots of fun... 186 00:09:51,317 --> 00:09:54,233 you know, set up the projector, turn on the fog machine... 187 00:09:54,358 --> 00:09:57,650 and everybody is like, "Oh, no! Ghost pirates!" 188 00:09:57,900 --> 00:10:01,067 And then you'd abandon ship like you were supposed to... 189 00:10:01,233 --> 00:10:03,108 and then we'd help ourselves to the booty. 190 00:10:03,233 --> 00:10:06,900 Treasure? Like gold doubloons and "pieces of eight"? 191 00:10:06,983 --> 00:10:07,942 Think about it, kid. 192 00:10:08,025 --> 00:10:10,942 Who ships doubloons across the Bermuda Triangle these days? 193 00:10:11,067 --> 00:10:12,817 You want to know what our biggest haul was? 194 00:10:12,983 --> 00:10:14,483 Shipment of I'Eggs eggs. 195 00:10:14,608 --> 00:10:17,900 Some of the boys still wear the pantyhose as sashes and headbands. 196 00:10:18,233 --> 00:10:20,025 - Did that hurt? - Not really. 197 00:10:20,192 --> 00:10:23,733 Here. Lick your arm. I've got more in me pocket. 198 00:10:30,900 --> 00:10:32,233 What the hell was that? 199 00:10:32,358 --> 00:10:33,775 Oh, come on now. 200 00:10:33,983 --> 00:10:37,358 I can't believe you think that old joke would work on me twice. 201 00:10:37,442 --> 00:10:39,233 I'm totally serious. I don't know what that was. 202 00:10:39,400 --> 00:10:40,858 Yeah, right. 203 00:10:41,442 --> 00:10:42,400 I don't hear anything. 204 00:10:42,567 --> 00:10:44,025 But you did, right? 205 00:11:03,150 --> 00:11:04,067 There it is again. 206 00:11:04,192 --> 00:11:05,442 I didn't hear... 207 00:11:05,858 --> 00:11:06,817 I can't hear any... 208 00:11:06,900 --> 00:11:07,942 Hold on a second. 209 00:11:08,358 --> 00:11:09,567 You didn't just... 210 00:11:09,942 --> 00:11:11,150 You heard that, right? 211 00:11:11,275 --> 00:11:12,942 What am I listening for? 212 00:11:13,067 --> 00:11:15,650 If you would just shut up for a minute! 213 00:11:17,317 --> 00:11:19,067 OK. I see them. 214 00:11:19,608 --> 00:11:23,650 I think they're drunk on rum because they're pirates. 215 00:11:24,108 --> 00:11:25,150 Hey, I found your knife. 216 00:11:25,275 --> 00:11:26,650 Leave it. You're not ready. 217 00:11:26,733 --> 00:11:29,650 Now I want you to put your hand around your throat, Hank. 218 00:11:30,400 --> 00:11:31,358 All right. 219 00:11:31,483 --> 00:11:33,650 That tube you feel is your trachea. 220 00:11:33,775 --> 00:11:34,983 Think of it as a handle. 221 00:11:35,317 --> 00:11:37,233 Your thumb is on your carotid artery. 222 00:11:37,358 --> 00:11:38,275 That's your button. 223 00:11:38,358 --> 00:11:42,025 Now, remember... grab the handle. Push the button. 224 00:11:42,400 --> 00:11:43,567 Repeat that back. 225 00:11:43,650 --> 00:11:45,358 Grab the handle. Push the... 226 00:11:45,442 --> 00:11:47,233 Let go of your own throat, Hank. 227 00:11:48,567 --> 00:11:50,025 Journal entry 48. 228 00:11:50,358 --> 00:11:53,650 The blanket of warm vomit that previously kept the icy chill at bay... 229 00:11:53,733 --> 00:11:55,650 has hardened to a sticky shell. 230 00:11:56,025 --> 00:11:57,817 Thankfully, the stench has faded. 231 00:11:58,025 --> 00:12:01,108 Continued efforts to contact base have proved fruitless... 232 00:12:01,442 --> 00:12:03,983 and the clam won't quit it. 233 00:12:08,233 --> 00:12:10,650 All right. This is just getting downright spooky. 234 00:12:10,817 --> 00:12:12,358 Come on. Just give me the key, Dean. 235 00:12:12,483 --> 00:12:14,942 I really don't have the key, I swear. 236 00:12:15,150 --> 00:12:16,483 I guess Brock might. 237 00:12:16,775 --> 00:12:18,192 Who's Brock? 238 00:12:18,483 --> 00:12:19,733 My dad's bodyguard. 239 00:12:19,858 --> 00:12:21,567 Your dad has a bodyguard? 240 00:12:21,900 --> 00:12:24,354 Why would he need a bodyguard? The guy's a tank. 241 00:12:24,410 --> 00:12:26,108 Well, because... 242 00:12:26,233 --> 00:12:27,733 So where is this Brock guy? 243 00:12:27,900 --> 00:12:29,608 He's hiding... 244 00:12:29,817 --> 00:12:31,608 and waiting to save me... 245 00:12:31,900 --> 00:12:33,858 with guys. 246 00:12:34,233 --> 00:12:37,108 You're not a very good liar, Dean, are you? 247 00:12:37,317 --> 00:12:38,817 Maybe. 248 00:12:39,067 --> 00:12:41,192 Yo ho, Mike. Do you copy? 249 00:12:41,775 --> 00:12:43,942 We hit a Toys "R" Us ship a couple of years ago. 250 00:12:44,067 --> 00:12:45,358 - Yo ho, Captain. - Yeah, Mike. 251 00:12:45,483 --> 00:12:48,817 The guy in the brig might have the key, or there might be someone named Brock... 252 00:12:48,942 --> 00:12:51,567 - Ioose on the ship with... - Guys. 253 00:12:51,692 --> 00:12:53,275 With guys, Mike. 254 00:12:55,650 --> 00:12:58,192 You are not gonna tell me you didn't hear that! 255 00:12:58,567 --> 00:13:02,525 After the twist, you'll feel a snap, and the body goes rag doll on you. 256 00:13:02,650 --> 00:13:06,483 And that will knock him out even more? 257 00:13:06,608 --> 00:13:07,442 That will kill him. 258 00:13:07,608 --> 00:13:08,400 Do I have to? 259 00:13:08,525 --> 00:13:10,067 All right. Fine, crybaby. 260 00:13:10,150 --> 00:13:12,942 Just tie him up and maybe, I guess, gag him... 261 00:13:12,983 --> 00:13:14,067 But at the first sign of trouble... 262 00:13:14,150 --> 00:13:16,692 I want you to at least break both his knees. 263 00:13:19,067 --> 00:13:21,358 Hank, there's no reason to get upset. 264 00:13:21,483 --> 00:13:22,358 I'll get you through... 265 00:13:22,525 --> 00:13:23,858 Crap. Someone's coming. 266 00:13:23,983 --> 00:13:26,317 Maintain radio silence and stay calm. 267 00:13:27,233 --> 00:13:31,275 We need that key that starts your boat, Mr. Big Stuff. Let's have it. 268 00:13:32,483 --> 00:13:33,942 It's up my ass. 269 00:13:34,108 --> 00:13:34,858 Are you serious? 270 00:13:35,067 --> 00:13:36,317 Why don't you check? 271 00:13:36,733 --> 00:13:38,942 Well? Check. 272 00:13:39,067 --> 00:13:39,858 What if he's lying? 273 00:13:40,025 --> 00:13:42,317 If he were telling the truth, that would be better? 274 00:13:43,192 --> 00:13:47,817 Journal entry 56. 275 00:13:48,400 --> 00:13:49,858 I just learned that giant clams... 276 00:13:50,025 --> 00:13:52,442 don't like the taste of exploding robot legs. 277 00:13:52,900 --> 00:13:55,400 I've taken refuge in the forward compartment 278 00:13:55,525 --> 00:13:57,567 and am now running on reserve power... 279 00:13:57,900 --> 00:14:02,775 mobility hindered, morale low, no radio contact. 280 00:14:02,942 --> 00:14:04,483 Oh, yeah. 281 00:14:04,775 --> 00:14:10,275 I lost my locator, and, yes, I realize the irony of that. 282 00:14:11,650 --> 00:14:12,983 No way! 283 00:14:13,317 --> 00:14:15,150 Journal entry 57. 284 00:14:15,275 --> 00:14:16,983 Oh, how they scoffed. 285 00:14:17,192 --> 00:14:21,733 True, in light of certain setbacks, I even began to doubt myself... 286 00:14:22,025 --> 00:14:26,108 but through perseverance and no small amount of ingenuity... 287 00:14:26,233 --> 00:14:30,942 I've located the saucer! 288 00:14:32,567 --> 00:14:35,275 I can't believe I got to swab the poop deck. 289 00:14:35,942 --> 00:14:39,108 And remember how you complained when we hit that Red Cross ship? 290 00:14:40,025 --> 00:14:43,067 "What are we gonna do with twenty crates of rubber gloves?" 291 00:14:43,192 --> 00:14:44,650 Totally take it back. 292 00:14:44,983 --> 00:14:46,317 Hey, buddy, 293 00:14:47,025 --> 00:14:49,275 I'd kill for one of those right about now. 294 00:14:50,067 --> 00:14:51,192 My last pack. 295 00:14:51,608 --> 00:14:53,067 It'll help me relax. 296 00:14:53,192 --> 00:14:55,067 Dude, give him one. 297 00:14:56,733 --> 00:14:57,483 Please. 298 00:14:57,608 --> 00:14:58,817 No. Screw him. 299 00:14:58,942 --> 00:15:00,858 Pirates don't give people cigarettes. 300 00:15:00,983 --> 00:15:02,025 They take them. 301 00:15:04,067 --> 00:15:05,275 My friggin' hand! 302 00:15:05,400 --> 00:15:06,817 My elbow! My arm! 303 00:15:06,942 --> 00:15:09,233 Let go of my arm with your ass! 304 00:15:10,567 --> 00:15:13,108 Your ass is clamped to my arm! 305 00:15:14,775 --> 00:15:17,692 Mike? Yo ho? 306 00:15:18,358 --> 00:15:19,942 What's going on with that key already? 307 00:15:20,025 --> 00:15:22,567 Hey, Captain, I got your key. 308 00:15:22,983 --> 00:15:27,108 Hope you're hungry... 'cause I'm gonna feed it to you. 309 00:15:31,942 --> 00:15:34,483 I told you what I'd do for one of these. 310 00:15:35,483 --> 00:15:36,567 This is all wrong. 311 00:15:36,733 --> 00:15:38,858 This is not the way this is supposed to go down. 312 00:15:40,150 --> 00:15:42,733 Wow. I've never hot-wired a hydrofoil before. 313 00:15:42,942 --> 00:15:44,192 That was easy. 314 00:15:45,025 --> 00:15:47,067 Wait! What about my dad? 315 00:15:47,192 --> 00:15:49,650 Kid, who do you think's the reason I'm hauling ass out of here? 316 00:15:49,775 --> 00:15:52,317 Did you hear him? He sounded scarier than... 317 00:15:52,942 --> 00:15:54,733 Than whatever the hell that is. 318 00:15:56,483 --> 00:16:00,858 And as I prepare to open the long-submerged saucer... 319 00:16:01,067 --> 00:16:03,025 I must pause for a brief aside... 320 00:16:03,192 --> 00:16:10,345 for once again, where my father failed, I, Dr. Thaddeus S. Venture, am about to... 321 00:16:10,525 --> 00:16:11,650 Whoop. 322 00:16:11,900 --> 00:16:14,775 No, no, no, no! Now you try to help me? 323 00:16:14,900 --> 00:16:16,692 Cancel mission-abort command. 324 00:16:16,817 --> 00:16:18,442 Rebort. Do you copy? 325 00:16:18,567 --> 00:16:20,900 Take me back over to the thing. 326 00:16:21,025 --> 00:16:23,608 Seriously, Brock, what the f... 327 00:16:25,400 --> 00:16:26,233 You OK? 328 00:16:26,400 --> 00:16:28,733 Oh, my God. Am I bleeding? 329 00:16:28,858 --> 00:16:30,150 It's a little red. 330 00:16:31,192 --> 00:16:32,858 Thought we cut the anchor chain. 331 00:16:35,150 --> 00:16:36,858 Well, here's your trouble right h... 332 00:16:37,067 --> 00:16:38,150 What's going on here? 333 00:16:38,317 --> 00:16:40,025 Aw, come on. Who did this? 334 00:16:40,108 --> 00:16:42,233 Like these guys haven't had it bad enough tonight. 335 00:16:42,400 --> 00:16:44,233 Guess you weren't lying about that Brock guy. 336 00:16:44,400 --> 00:16:45,567 I guess I wasn't. 337 00:16:46,525 --> 00:16:50,150 What kind of expert bodyguard ties men up with big bows? 338 00:16:52,858 --> 00:16:55,442 - That came from the bow. - Told you. 339 00:16:59,108 --> 00:17:00,942 A real ghost? 340 00:17:01,108 --> 00:17:02,233 Gaar! That's... 341 00:17:03,108 --> 00:17:05,483 That... wow! No way! 342 00:17:05,650 --> 00:17:07,692 Hank, don't move. 343 00:17:07,817 --> 00:17:09,108 - I can't. - Shoot it. 344 00:17:09,192 --> 00:17:12,275 This thing came from the same ship we got the walkie-talkies. 345 00:17:12,400 --> 00:17:13,400 It's plastic. 346 00:17:13,608 --> 00:17:16,150 And that's a ghost! 347 00:17:16,553 --> 00:17:18,525 Well, do something. 348 00:17:18,608 --> 00:17:19,525 You're a grownup. 349 00:17:19,650 --> 00:17:22,733 All right. I'll save your dad's bodyguard. 350 00:17:22,983 --> 00:17:24,400 I guess I deserve this. 351 00:17:24,525 --> 00:17:27,942 You live by the ghost, you die by the ghost. 352 00:17:42,900 --> 00:17:45,108 Uh, it doesn't seem to want to kill us. 353 00:17:45,192 --> 00:17:49,192 It doesn't seem to want to do anything except that. 354 00:18:00,067 --> 00:18:01,900 Dr. Orpheus, master of mysticism. 355 00:18:02,108 --> 00:18:04,525 Oh, hello, Hank. 356 00:18:04,775 --> 00:18:06,567 How is your father? 357 00:18:07,108 --> 00:18:08,983 Well, I'm busy at the moment. 358 00:18:09,150 --> 00:18:14,567 Pumpkin's due home from tennis, and I'm making my famous frittatas. 359 00:18:14,858 --> 00:18:16,983 What is that yelling in the background? 360 00:18:17,150 --> 00:18:18,692 It's kind of what I called about. 361 00:18:19,067 --> 00:18:21,358 We have a ghost problem. 362 00:18:21,525 --> 00:18:22,567 Who's that he's talking to? 363 00:18:22,650 --> 00:18:25,900 Well, he's a necromancer. He lives in my backyard. 364 00:18:26,233 --> 00:18:31,150 Hank, are you certain it isn't just a guy in a rubber mask messing with you? 365 00:18:31,733 --> 00:18:32,942 I see. 366 00:18:33,525 --> 00:18:34,733 No. I can hear it. 367 00:18:34,817 --> 00:18:37,817 Listen, Hank. Can you hang on a sec? 368 00:18:38,275 --> 00:18:39,942 What's he saying? 369 00:18:40,025 --> 00:18:41,108 I'm on hold. 370 00:18:41,275 --> 00:18:44,108 I think he's astroprojecting or something. 371 00:18:44,358 --> 00:18:45,942 Journal entry whatever. 372 00:18:46,317 --> 00:18:48,900 All attempts to contact the ship above me have failed. 373 00:18:49,400 --> 00:18:52,733 The only warmth I feel stems from moderate hypothermia. 374 00:18:53,525 --> 00:18:56,775 All I can do now is wait for death's casual hand... 375 00:18:56,942 --> 00:19:01,567 to finish the job that fate began at my uneventful puberty. 376 00:19:05,233 --> 00:19:07,525 All right, Hank. Are you there? 377 00:19:07,942 --> 00:19:10,400 I went through your grandfather's records. 378 00:19:10,608 --> 00:19:13,692 My garage has piles of them, but I have it figured out. 379 00:19:14,192 --> 00:19:18,858 A Major Tom was tragically lost on that very spot... 380 00:19:19,067 --> 00:19:21,733 in the nineteen hundred and sixties. 381 00:19:21,900 --> 00:19:24,858 That's your man. I can feel it in my soul. 382 00:19:24,983 --> 00:19:26,317 So what do I do? 383 00:19:26,400 --> 00:19:28,775 Oh, please. You've seen "Ghost"? 384 00:19:28,983 --> 00:19:31,067 The rest is cake. Do you have a pen? 385 00:19:31,192 --> 00:19:32,733 To use as a magic wand. 386 00:19:32,900 --> 00:19:34,983 To use as a pen, Hank. 387 00:19:35,233 --> 00:19:36,775 Take this number down. 388 00:19:42,692 --> 00:19:43,650 Hello? 389 00:19:43,817 --> 00:19:45,067 Hello, Mrs. Tom? 390 00:19:45,233 --> 00:19:47,150 Oh, I didn't know this thing still worked. 391 00:19:47,275 --> 00:19:48,442 Marvelous. 392 00:19:48,525 --> 00:19:50,275 Mrs. Tom, it's about your husband. 393 00:19:50,400 --> 00:19:51,567 He's in trouble. 394 00:19:51,692 --> 00:19:53,400 Jeanie? Jeanie, what's happening? 395 00:19:53,483 --> 00:19:55,192 Rodney? He's right here. 396 00:19:55,317 --> 00:19:56,442 Do you want to speak with him? 397 00:19:56,525 --> 00:20:00,150 Dude, no. I want you to talk to your husband so he'll shut up. 398 00:20:00,317 --> 00:20:02,442 No offense, Mrs. Tom, but he's a real pain. 399 00:20:02,567 --> 00:20:03,942 Beg pardon? 400 00:20:10,442 --> 00:20:12,650 Tom, it's your wife, sweetie. 401 00:20:12,817 --> 00:20:14,983 You're dead now. It's time to go. 402 00:20:15,275 --> 00:20:18,067 Leave the Venture family alone, honey. 403 00:20:19,858 --> 00:20:20,775 It's working. 404 00:20:20,942 --> 00:20:22,942 Give me that. Tom, it's Rodney. 405 00:20:23,067 --> 00:20:24,400 You know, the action man. 406 00:20:24,692 --> 00:20:26,900 It was sure good times we had back then... 407 00:20:27,025 --> 00:20:28,900 But that was almost thirty years ago. 408 00:20:29,150 --> 00:20:31,317 You're dead. Jeanie's remarried... 409 00:20:31,775 --> 00:20:33,192 to me, actually. 410 00:20:48,733 --> 00:20:50,275 Well, we could've done that. 411 00:20:51,650 --> 00:20:54,275 Final journal entry. 412 00:20:56,275 --> 00:21:00,692 Perhaps someday my own sons will find it and learn from my mistakes... 413 00:21:01,650 --> 00:21:03,733 When they return to this spot to get rich... 414 00:21:03,817 --> 00:21:06,817 off of discovering my father's flying saucer... 415 00:21:06,983 --> 00:21:09,567 and my meta-sonic locator. 416 00:21:10,942 --> 00:21:16,275 If you're listening to this, boys, I just want you both to know... 417 00:21:48,108 --> 00:21:49,192 His eyes! 418 00:21:49,900 --> 00:21:51,650 Crazy eyes! 419 00:21:53,025 --> 00:21:54,775 Accusing! 420 00:21:58,108 --> 00:21:59,025 Who are you? 421 00:21:59,192 --> 00:22:01,067 All right, Brock. I know this sounds crazy... 422 00:22:01,192 --> 00:22:02,567 but just hear him out. 423 00:22:04,692 --> 00:22:05,983 Can we have a ride home? 424 00:22:06,150 --> 00:22:07,900 - What? - No. 425 00:22:08,067 --> 00:22:10,108 Do it like you said you were gonna. 426 00:22:11,317 --> 00:22:14,317 I'm really, really sorry about this whole mess... 427 00:22:14,483 --> 00:22:17,108 and, you know, the whole pirate thing is behind me now... 428 00:22:17,317 --> 00:22:19,942 and plus, you kind of killed Steve and burnt my ship. 429 00:22:19,982 --> 00:22:25,192 So if you could give us a lift out of here, I figured we'd just call it squaresies. 430 00:22:26,067 --> 00:22:29,358 - All right. - Go, Team Venture! 431 00:22:29,608 --> 00:22:31,608 I don't know. They just do that.