1
00:00:02,540 --> 00:00:05,750
Meredith: When I was a kid,
I would wake up every morning

2
00:00:05,750 --> 00:00:07,580
in the winter and immediately
open the curtains

3
00:00:07,580 --> 00:00:09,670
to see if it was snowing.

4
00:00:09,670 --> 00:00:11,710
Where are you,
where are you...
♪ Doctor ♪

5
00:00:11,710 --> 00:00:13,170
And it usually was.

6
00:00:13,170 --> 00:00:14,210
It was Boston.

7
00:00:14,210 --> 00:00:15,460
♪ Look into my eyes ♪

8
00:00:15,460 --> 00:00:17,960
Woman on P.A.: Dr. James...

9
00:00:17,960 --> 00:00:21,750
♪ I've been breathing air,
but there's no sign of life ♪

10
00:00:21,750 --> 00:00:24,460
Okay, so what are we, uh...
Hey! What are you doing? Stop!

11
00:00:24,460 --> 00:00:27,420
It's freezing out there, and
there are sick people in here.

12
00:00:27,420 --> 00:00:29,880
♪ Doctor, the problem's
in my chest ♪
Sorry, Vic -- Vic -- Hello?

13
00:00:29,880 --> 00:00:31,960
No, it's crazy in the ER
right now. I can't talk.

14
00:00:31,960 --> 00:00:33,380
♪ My heart feels cold as ice,
but it's anybody's guess ♪
Alright.

15
00:00:33,380 --> 00:00:34,960
What do you -- What do you mean?
Why are you mad?

16
00:00:34,960 --> 00:00:36,750
Um, okay.
You know what?

17
00:00:36,750 --> 00:00:38,420
I can't hear you.
Hello?

18
00:00:38,420 --> 00:00:39,580
♪ Doctor, can you help me
'cause I don't feel right ♪

19
00:00:39,580 --> 00:00:41,120
Pretty sure she just
faked not hearing me

20
00:00:41,120 --> 00:00:42,500
so she could hang up.
You paged?

21
00:00:42,500 --> 00:00:43,920
You said you got
a patient with frostbite?

22
00:00:43,920 --> 00:00:46,290
Yeah, beds 2, 3, 6, 7, and 9.
Have fun.

23
00:00:46,290 --> 00:00:48,540
All...
Yeah. Uh. Hey, whoa!

24
00:00:48,540 --> 00:00:50,040
Get away from that door.

25
00:00:50,040 --> 00:00:52,080
Okay.
Schools would close.

26
00:00:52,080 --> 00:00:55,210
People would hunker down,
light candles,

27
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and eat everything
in the refrigerator.

28
00:00:56,540 --> 00:00:57,830
♪ Well, it's cold, cold, cold,
cold inside ♪

29
00:00:57,830 --> 00:00:58,960
Sorry, sorry, sorry.
Hey, Schmitt!

30
00:00:58,960 --> 00:01:00,880
Hayes: I don't have time,
for God's sake!

31
00:01:00,880 --> 00:01:02,750
Come on, you can't be serious.
This is supposed to be

32
00:01:02,750 --> 00:01:04,670
the bloody Pacific Northwest,
and you're telling me --

33
00:01:04,670 --> 00:01:06,210
♪ Cold, cold, cold,
cold inside ♪
Well, thank you very much.

34
00:01:06,210 --> 00:01:07,710
You've been very helpful.
Yeah, thank you.

35
00:01:07,710 --> 00:01:09,750
Hayes.

36
00:01:09,750 --> 00:01:11,750
We usually let the parents do
the screaming on this floor.

37
00:01:11,750 --> 00:01:13,380
I just told my 6-year-old
patient's parents

38
00:01:13,380 --> 00:01:15,170
that I have a liver
for their dying child,

39
00:01:15,170 --> 00:01:17,330
but now half a foot of snow
has rendered every road

40
00:01:17,330 --> 00:01:19,120
in Seattle useless,
apparently.

41
00:01:19,120 --> 00:01:20,500
Okay.
And no airlift either?

42
00:01:20,500 --> 00:01:21,960
No, there's no visibility.

43
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And it's just three miles away.
Three bloody miles.

44
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Okay, well,
I'm sure the roads

45
00:01:25,330 --> 00:01:27,040
are gonna be cleared up
in a few hours.

46
00:01:27,040 --> 00:01:28,420
She doesn't have
a few hours, Grey.

47
00:01:28,420 --> 00:01:30,420
INR is climbing.
She's developing ascites.

48
00:01:30,420 --> 00:01:32,040
I'll get it.
What?
What?

49
00:01:32,040 --> 00:01:33,750
I'll get your liver.
It's at Seattle Pres, right?

50
00:01:33,750 --> 00:01:35,380
Give me the paperwork right now.
I'll go.

51
00:01:35,380 --> 00:01:36,710
Thank you.

52
00:01:36,710 --> 00:01:38,620
I don't know whose service
you're on, but I'll cover you.

53
00:01:38,620 --> 00:01:40,080
How are you gonna
get there?
I'll walk.

54
00:01:40,080 --> 00:01:41,080
Thank you.
You're welcome.

55
00:01:41,080 --> 00:01:42,830
Everyone loves a "snow day."

56
00:01:42,830 --> 00:01:44,210
Except for one person.

57
00:01:44,210 --> 00:01:45,420
My mother.

58
00:01:45,420 --> 00:01:47,290
She always said
the same thing --

59
00:01:47,290 --> 00:01:50,120
"Meredith, surgeons
don't get snow days."

60
00:01:50,120 --> 00:01:51,670
Hey.
♪ Doctor, can you help me,
'cause I don't feel right ♪

61
00:01:51,670 --> 00:01:53,210
So, you know it's
8 degrees outside

62
00:01:53,210 --> 00:01:55,290
with a wind chill
of minus-15.

63
00:01:55,290 --> 00:01:56,710
People are freezing
to death.

64
00:01:56,710 --> 00:01:59,040
Hey, I'm used to the cold,
alright? I grew up in Wisconsin.

65
00:01:59,040 --> 00:02:00,790
♪ Well, it's cold, cold,
cold, cold inside ♪
I used to be a cross-country
skier in high school.

66
00:02:00,790 --> 00:02:03,000
Okay, well,
where are your skis,

67
00:02:03,000 --> 00:02:04,290
in your locker?
♪ Darker in the day
than the dead of night ♪

68
00:02:04,290 --> 00:02:06,040
Look, just tell Hayes
to call Seattle Pres

69
00:02:06,040 --> 00:02:07,420
and that I'll be there
in an hour, okay?
♪ Cold, cold, cold,
cold inside ♪

70
00:02:07,420 --> 00:02:08,670
Listen to me.
I'm not just not sure

71
00:02:08,670 --> 00:02:10,500
you're thinking
about this clearly.

72
00:02:10,500 --> 00:02:12,120
Hayes was just screaming
at the top of his lungs

73
00:02:12,120 --> 00:02:14,080
and slamming his phone down.
On the PEDS floor.

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00:02:14,080 --> 00:02:16,380
♪ Something don't feel right ♪

75
00:02:16,380 --> 00:02:17,620
You gonna tell him that
he sounds like my dad, too?

76
00:02:17,620 --> 00:02:18,670
♪ Something don't feel right ♪
She was right.

77
00:02:18,670 --> 00:02:19,670
We don't.

78
00:02:26,290 --> 00:02:29,210
"An object's weight
is the product

79
00:02:29,210 --> 00:02:31,040
of the Earth's
gravitational pull

80
00:02:31,040 --> 00:02:33,750
and the mass of
that object.

81
00:02:33,750 --> 00:02:37,040
What happens to the mass
and weight of a rocket

82
00:02:37,040 --> 00:02:39,880
as it travels beyond
Earth's orbit?"

83
00:02:39,880 --> 00:02:41,330
Kind of tricky.

84
00:02:41,330 --> 00:02:43,540
Mass is the same.
Weight decreases.

85
00:02:43,540 --> 00:02:46,830
Hmm.
I mean, correct.

86
00:02:46,830 --> 00:02:48,170
Taryn: Chief?

87
00:02:48,170 --> 00:02:49,330
Yeah?
Eight more nurses

88
00:02:49,330 --> 00:02:51,380
can't get here due to
the road conditions.

89
00:02:51,380 --> 00:02:53,830
ER's over capacity,
and Dr. DeLuca

90
00:02:53,830 --> 00:02:56,170
went on foot to pick up
a liver from Seattle Pres.

91
00:02:56,170 --> 00:02:57,460
He did what?

92
00:02:57,460 --> 00:02:58,620
Di--

93
00:02:58,620 --> 00:03:00,330
Alright. I-I'm coming.

94
00:03:00,330 --> 00:03:02,960
Joey.

95
00:03:02,960 --> 00:03:04,000
Keep at it.

96
00:03:04,000 --> 00:03:05,040
Yes, ma'am.

97
00:03:09,420 --> 00:03:11,330
Checked on the TEVAR
from last night.

98
00:03:11,330 --> 00:03:13,120
BP is finally normalized.

99
00:03:13,120 --> 00:03:14,380
Shh, shh, shh!

100
00:03:14,380 --> 00:03:15,880
Still snowing?

101
00:03:15,880 --> 00:03:18,420
Uh, it is.

102
00:03:18,420 --> 00:03:21,460
Coffee?
Two sugars. Thanks.

103
00:03:24,120 --> 00:03:26,920
So, Amelia's
not coming to work.

104
00:03:26,920 --> 00:03:29,960
She's not returning
my calls or my texts.

105
00:03:29,960 --> 00:03:31,460
Um, are we just
gonna keep doing this

106
00:03:31,460 --> 00:03:32,880
till the baby arrives,
then we --
Hey, Teddy!

107
00:03:34,250 --> 00:03:36,330
Oh. Would you like
some coffee, as well?

108
00:03:36,330 --> 00:03:39,420
I am pouring for everyone.

109
00:03:39,420 --> 00:03:40,420
Everything okay
with Amelia?

110
00:03:40,420 --> 00:03:41,750
What, she get snowed in?

111
00:03:41,750 --> 00:03:43,170
Oh.

112
00:03:43,170 --> 00:03:45,000
Something like that.

113
00:03:48,290 --> 00:03:50,710
Mm. Shepherd should take
a leave more often.

114
00:03:50,710 --> 00:03:52,080
Makes him look like
he actually belongs

115
00:03:52,080 --> 00:03:53,170
with the rest of
us mortals.

116
00:03:56,620 --> 00:03:57,670
Mm. You know what?

117
00:03:57,670 --> 00:03:59,210
I --

118
00:03:59,210 --> 00:04:00,120
I don't need
any more coffee.

119
00:04:00,120 --> 00:04:01,420
Here, someone take this.

120
00:04:01,420 --> 00:04:02,880
Uh...

121
00:04:06,920 --> 00:04:08,420
Amelia's on leave?

122
00:04:08,420 --> 00:04:09,460
Why?
Beats me.

123
00:04:09,460 --> 00:04:10,500
I just got a cryptic text

124
00:04:10,500 --> 00:04:11,750
saying the baby's fine

125
00:04:11,750 --> 00:04:13,670
but she needed me
to cover her service.

126
00:04:13,670 --> 00:04:16,580
And judging from Link's
disregard for personal hygiene,

127
00:04:16,580 --> 00:04:18,170
that doesn't bode well
for their little insta-family.

128
00:04:18,170 --> 00:04:19,710
Or her patients.

129
00:04:19,710 --> 00:04:21,120
Ha ha!
Kidding.

130
00:04:21,120 --> 00:04:25,250
Ohh!
Adonis has made this warm.

131
00:04:25,250 --> 00:04:27,000
Ahh.

132
00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:28,210
Man on tablet:
Little bit of bleeding.

133
00:04:28,210 --> 00:04:30,380
A rupture.
Oh, come on, man!

134
00:04:30,380 --> 00:04:32,750
Get proximal
and distal control.

135
00:04:32,750 --> 00:04:34,750
Mabel: Yeah, that's
why that guy died.
What...

136
00:04:34,750 --> 00:04:36,250
Oops. Spoiler alert.

137
00:04:36,250 --> 00:04:38,290
Whatcha working on?

138
00:04:38,290 --> 00:04:40,960
Oh, I have a lap chole
later today.

139
00:04:40,960 --> 00:04:42,960
Not everybody
was snowed out.

140
00:04:42,960 --> 00:04:46,040
Oh, yeah. Haven't you done
like a million of those?

141
00:04:46,040 --> 00:04:49,830
Why are you practicing?
I'm experienced
because I practice.

142
00:04:49,830 --> 00:04:51,170
I just don't get it.

143
00:04:51,170 --> 00:04:53,380
Those residents...

144
00:04:53,380 --> 00:04:55,290
they work their butts off,

145
00:04:55,290 --> 00:04:57,710
they go into a mountain of debt,
all for a chance

146
00:04:57,710 --> 00:05:00,290
at the greatest job
on the planet,

147
00:05:00,290 --> 00:05:02,620
and they treat it
like it's retail.

148
00:05:06,210 --> 00:05:10,210
What's your name?
Desmond, sir.
Tess Desmond.

149
00:05:11,920 --> 00:05:16,170
Well, Dr. Desmond, why
don't you step over here?

150
00:05:16,170 --> 00:05:19,120
And let's see what

151
00:05:19,120 --> 00:05:22,250
your laparoscopic skills
are like, hmm?

152
00:05:24,710 --> 00:05:27,000
Uh, Dr. Karev!
Good morning!
It's not. And move.

153
00:05:27,000 --> 00:05:28,670
We need to do pre-op rounds
on my carcinoma.

154
00:05:28,670 --> 00:05:31,000
I actually think we should
save Ms. Anderson for last.

155
00:05:31,000 --> 00:05:33,080
Like, switch it up
a bit, right?
I disrespectfully disagree.

156
00:05:33,080 --> 00:05:34,420
I need to order --
I need to talk to her.

157
00:05:34,420 --> 00:05:36,330
Move!

158
00:05:40,250 --> 00:05:42,460
Schmitt.
Um, I might've
misplaced her.

159
00:05:42,460 --> 00:05:43,750
Or she misplaced herself.

160
00:05:43,750 --> 00:05:45,460
You misplace pens.

161
00:05:45,460 --> 00:05:46,880
You misplace keys.

162
00:05:46,880 --> 00:05:48,210
You don't misplace people.

163
00:05:48,210 --> 00:05:49,960
Sure, when you
put it like that,

164
00:05:49,960 --> 00:05:52,920
but I still don't know
where she --
Find her!

165
00:05:52,920 --> 00:05:55,120
While you're at it,
try and find my husband.

166
00:06:01,540 --> 00:06:04,120
Stupid. Cavalier. Cowboy.
Doesn't ever listen.

167
00:06:04,120 --> 00:06:05,710
Maybe fired.
All due respect, Chief,

168
00:06:05,710 --> 00:06:07,750
my patient will die
without that liver.

169
00:06:07,750 --> 00:06:09,290
DeLuca could save her.
It's only three miles away.

170
00:06:09,290 --> 00:06:10,750
Carina:
Have you been outside?

171
00:06:10,750 --> 00:06:12,540
You can't even see three feet
ahead of you.

172
00:06:12,540 --> 00:06:14,250
Somebody needs to go
after him.

173
00:06:14,250 --> 00:06:16,080
What about Ben?
Can Ben send a rig out

174
00:06:16,080 --> 00:06:17,460
and look for him?
Yeah.

175
00:06:17,460 --> 00:06:18,880
He can get him to Seattle Pres
and get him back.

176
00:06:18,880 --> 00:06:21,540
Last time we spoke,
Ben was amputating a foot

177
00:06:21,540 --> 00:06:23,460
in a grounded rig.
So, no.

178
00:06:23,460 --> 00:06:25,290
Dr. Bailey, you asked me
to let you know

179
00:06:25,290 --> 00:06:26,540
when I discharged
Joey Phillips.

180
00:06:26,540 --> 00:06:28,790
No, no!
In the middle of a blizzard?

181
00:06:28,790 --> 00:06:30,120
What's the matter with you?

182
00:06:30,120 --> 00:06:32,210
Sorry, there's no medical
reason to keep him.

183
00:06:32,210 --> 00:06:33,880
All that's left is his dispo
with Social Services.

184
00:06:33,880 --> 00:06:36,290
He's free to go.

185
00:06:36,290 --> 00:06:38,170
Uh, and let me know
if there's an update.

186
00:06:38,170 --> 00:06:39,880
I'll call Andrea
every 15 minutes.

187
00:06:39,880 --> 00:06:41,790
Dr. Hayes, something's wrong!

188
00:06:41,790 --> 00:06:44,460
Baby? Elisa?
Honey, wake up.

189
00:06:44,460 --> 00:06:45,960
Honey?
Meredith:
She's hemorrhaging.

190
00:06:45,960 --> 00:06:48,830
Let's hang some FFP and get
two units of blood in here.

191
00:06:48,830 --> 00:06:50,380
Damn it, she's unresponsive.

192
00:06:50,380 --> 00:06:52,250
Oh, God.
It's okay. It's okay.
She's okay.

193
00:06:52,250 --> 00:06:54,000
Let's get an intubation tray
in here right now.

194
00:06:54,000 --> 00:06:56,170
Let's book an OR!

195
00:06:56,170 --> 00:06:59,170
Ms. Gutierrez, how are
we feeling today?

196
00:06:59,170 --> 00:07:01,580
I called my neighbor,
Stevie,

197
00:07:01,580 --> 00:07:04,880
to check that the heat
is still on in my house

198
00:07:04,880 --> 00:07:08,620
so my cats are okay,
but I worry about the strays.

199
00:07:08,620 --> 00:07:11,880
They don't have wings,
can't just fly south.

200
00:07:11,880 --> 00:07:13,960
You know, freezing to death
isn't supposed to be that bad.

201
00:07:15,750 --> 00:07:17,380
Uh, uh, people, uh,

202
00:07:17,380 --> 00:07:19,750
who have been resuscitated
said it was blissful.

203
00:07:19,750 --> 00:07:21,580
Ms. Gutierrez, if I may,

204
00:07:21,580 --> 00:07:24,210
I saw on TV that the animal
shelters are open 24/7.

205
00:07:24,210 --> 00:07:25,540
There's plenty of food.

206
00:07:25,540 --> 00:07:27,250
People can bring in
any animal that they find.

207
00:07:27,250 --> 00:07:29,120
Even horses.
Really?

208
00:07:29,120 --> 00:07:31,210
Oh, that's nice.

209
00:07:31,210 --> 00:07:32,750
Richard: Okay, then,
Ms. Gutierrez.

210
00:07:32,750 --> 00:07:35,420
Someone will come
to bring you to pre-op soon.

211
00:07:37,290 --> 00:07:39,790
Hey, Desmond, meet me
in the scrub room.

212
00:07:39,790 --> 00:07:42,500
Me?
Her? Uh, I'm -- I'm supposed
to assist, Dr. Webber.

213
00:07:42,500 --> 00:07:44,580
I remember. But I'm sure
the ER is slammed.

214
00:07:44,580 --> 00:07:45,830
They could use the help.

215
00:07:51,380 --> 00:07:54,120
Woman on TV: The worst snowstorm
we have ever seen in Seattle.

216
00:07:55,170 --> 00:07:56,670
Woman #2 on TV:
That's right --

217
00:07:56,670 --> 00:07:57,960
residents
around the region...

218
00:07:57,960 --> 00:08:00,500
I've never seen it
snow like this in Seattle.

219
00:08:00,500 --> 00:08:04,920
Mm, it's not supposed to, but
y'all ruined the planet so...

220
00:08:04,920 --> 00:08:07,960
The social worker said

221
00:08:07,960 --> 00:08:10,960
that you declined to meet
with her about your options.

222
00:08:10,960 --> 00:08:13,830
Mm. I just turned 18.

223
00:08:13,830 --> 00:08:17,290
Which means you can apply
for extended foster care

224
00:08:17,290 --> 00:08:19,540
or go to a group home.
Or go out on my own.

225
00:08:19,540 --> 00:08:21,670
Why take the chance on getting
crappy foster parents

226
00:08:21,670 --> 00:08:22,960
just in it for the money?

227
00:08:22,960 --> 00:08:28,120
Because you -- you might
get a great family.

228
00:08:28,120 --> 00:08:31,290
People that can help you get
your high-school diploma,

229
00:08:31,290 --> 00:08:33,380
apply for college.

230
00:08:33,380 --> 00:08:35,710
Uh, help you find
a career you love.

231
00:08:35,710 --> 00:08:37,500
What?
Oh. College?

232
00:08:37,500 --> 00:08:38,790
That'll never happen.

233
00:08:38,790 --> 00:08:40,250
I'll just get a job.

234
00:08:40,250 --> 00:08:41,880
There's always a sign
at a Burger Shack.

235
00:08:41,880 --> 00:08:44,080
Joey.

236
00:08:44,080 --> 00:08:46,250
Goodness.

237
00:08:46,250 --> 00:08:50,290
What...

238
00:08:50,290 --> 00:08:51,750
Come on.

239
00:08:51,750 --> 00:08:53,210
You're coming with me.

240
00:08:53,210 --> 00:08:55,830
You are checking out
jobs around here.

241
00:08:55,830 --> 00:08:58,210
I said, come on!

242
00:08:58,210 --> 00:09:00,040
Yes, ma'am.

243
00:09:07,500 --> 00:09:09,580
Hey.
Have you seen my patient?

244
00:09:09,580 --> 00:09:12,380
She's got brown hair
and maybe brownish eyes.

245
00:09:12,380 --> 00:09:14,420
She's about, um...

246
00:09:14,420 --> 00:09:15,580
Well, I don't know
how tall she is.

247
00:09:15,580 --> 00:09:17,170
I -- I've only
seen her in bed.

248
00:09:17,170 --> 00:09:19,620
Uh, no, but after you
find her,

249
00:09:19,620 --> 00:09:21,040
why don't we find
an on-call room?

250
00:09:21,040 --> 00:09:22,290
My hip replacement
rescheduled.

251
00:09:22,290 --> 00:09:24,080
Um, yeah, yeah, sure.

252
00:09:24,080 --> 00:09:25,330
May-- Uh, maybe.

253
00:09:25,330 --> 00:09:26,620
What? Doesn't sound fun?

254
00:09:26,620 --> 00:09:28,670
Might get snowed in,
make a night out of it.

255
00:09:28,670 --> 00:09:31,210
It does, but we've been
having a lot of fun lately.

256
00:09:31,210 --> 00:09:32,710
In fact, this might be
the most we've talked

257
00:09:32,710 --> 00:09:34,540
since you told me you
weren't out to your parents.

258
00:09:36,710 --> 00:09:39,460
I love you, Nico.
You can talk to me.

259
00:09:39,460 --> 00:09:41,750
You still
haven't found her?

260
00:09:41,750 --> 00:09:44,670
Schmitt, I know
this job is hard,

261
00:09:44,670 --> 00:09:46,040
but you should be able
to follow basics like,

262
00:09:46,040 --> 00:09:48,830
don't let a severely
sick patient evaporate.

263
00:09:48,830 --> 00:09:51,080
If she isn't here,
you shouldn't be either.

264
00:09:54,540 --> 00:09:55,830
I have to find my patient.

265
00:09:58,250 --> 00:09:59,920
Hey, more frostbite, bed 10.

266
00:09:59,920 --> 00:10:01,670
Of course there is.

267
00:10:01,670 --> 00:10:03,420
Hey. So, Mom called.

268
00:10:03,420 --> 00:10:04,540
Leo is stir-crazy.

269
00:10:04,540 --> 00:10:05,670
He keeps trying to open
the front door.

270
00:10:05,670 --> 00:10:08,210
But Allison rolled over.
Twice.

271
00:10:08,210 --> 00:10:11,000
No! Wait, did your mom record --
Oh, you know what?

272
00:10:11,000 --> 00:10:12,380
I don't even know
why I bothered to ask.
Kendra: Help!

273
00:10:12,380 --> 00:10:14,500
Help me, please!
Please help!

274
00:10:14,500 --> 00:10:16,210
It's my wife --
she's not talking.

275
00:10:16,210 --> 00:10:17,960
I don't think she's breathing.
Okay, just stop
moving her. Stop.

276
00:10:17,960 --> 00:10:19,170
Let's lay her down.
I got her.

277
00:10:19,170 --> 00:10:20,170
Alright. Yep.
Yeah.

278
00:10:20,170 --> 00:10:21,210
We need a gurney!
Woman: On it!

279
00:10:21,210 --> 00:10:22,710
She's 32 weeks pregnant.

280
00:10:22,710 --> 00:10:24,210
Why's she hurt?
What happened?

281
00:10:24,210 --> 00:10:25,880
I hit her with my car.

282
00:10:35,540 --> 00:10:37,290
Oh, my God. How far along?

283
00:10:37,290 --> 00:10:38,830
32 weeks. Page OB.

284
00:10:38,830 --> 00:10:40,500
Let's get the X-ray in here,
warm saline,

285
00:10:40,500 --> 00:10:42,250
and where's
the fetal heart monitor?

286
00:10:42,250 --> 00:10:44,250
-Is she dead?
-We need to do a full exam.

287
00:10:44,250 --> 00:10:45,710
Kendra, are you hurt?

288
00:10:45,710 --> 00:10:47,380
No, no, I'm just c-cold.

289
00:10:47,380 --> 00:10:48,790
Alright, let's get her
a warming blanket.

290
00:10:48,790 --> 00:10:50,880
Her back's been hurting her,
and I was snowed in at work,

291
00:10:50,880 --> 00:10:52,290
and she called and said
that she was worried

292
00:10:52,290 --> 00:10:53,830
that she might be having
contractions.

293
00:10:53,830 --> 00:10:55,960
And she wanted to come here.
We only live four blocks away.

294
00:10:55,960 --> 00:10:59,000
She was walking here?
I told her not to go,
but I-I got in my car.

295
00:10:59,000 --> 00:11:02,790
I was almost home, and that's
when I-I hit something.

296
00:11:02,790 --> 00:11:04,380
And I got out, and...

297
00:11:04,380 --> 00:11:06,880
I'm gonna be sick.
Whoa, whoa. Hey.

298
00:11:06,880 --> 00:11:09,170
Fetal heartbeat's strong.

299
00:11:09,170 --> 00:11:12,000
Tube's good.
Kendra: I thought I was driving
on the street.

300
00:11:12,000 --> 00:11:13,120
I was on the sidewalk.

301
00:11:16,750 --> 00:11:19,380
Tess: ...and then,
under direct visualization,

302
00:11:19,380 --> 00:11:20,880
we remove the ports.

303
00:11:20,880 --> 00:11:22,790
At which point we...

304
00:11:22,790 --> 00:11:24,290
Uh, deflate the abdomen

305
00:11:24,290 --> 00:11:26,540
and close the fascia
with U stitches.

306
00:11:27,750 --> 00:11:31,120
Great.
So...you ready?

307
00:11:31,120 --> 00:11:33,420
Uh, why wouldn't
I be ready?

308
00:11:33,420 --> 00:11:35,620
Oh, my mistake.
I didn't realize

309
00:11:35,620 --> 00:11:38,330
that you had already
performed a lap chole.

310
00:11:38,330 --> 00:11:40,210
Performed one?
Of course not.

311
00:11:40,210 --> 00:11:42,790
Wait, you don't
want me to...

312
00:11:42,790 --> 00:11:44,000
No, I-I --

313
00:11:44,000 --> 00:11:45,380
I can't.
I'm not ready.

314
00:11:45,380 --> 00:11:47,580
Do you know how many
of your classmates beg

315
00:11:47,580 --> 00:11:49,580
to do procedures
when they're not ready?

316
00:11:49,580 --> 00:11:51,290
By the way you formed
the question,

317
00:11:51,290 --> 00:11:53,250
I assume it's
a big number.

318
00:11:53,250 --> 00:11:54,880
I'm not gonna leave you
on your own, Desmond.

319
00:11:54,880 --> 00:11:56,330
You'll be my hands,

320
00:11:56,330 --> 00:11:57,790
but I will guide you through
the whole thing,

321
00:11:57,790 --> 00:11:59,210
step by step.

322
00:12:03,250 --> 00:12:06,670
Have you ever wanted something
with your whole being,

323
00:12:06,670 --> 00:12:09,960
but there are so
many obstacles

324
00:12:09,960 --> 00:12:11,250
it seems like you
won't get it?

325
00:12:11,250 --> 00:12:13,420
So you try to stop dreaming,

326
00:12:13,420 --> 00:12:15,380
but you can't make
yourself stop,

327
00:12:15,380 --> 00:12:20,500
so you just live with it,
quietly in hell?

328
00:12:20,500 --> 00:12:22,540
Let's show your classmates
what you're made of.

329
00:12:24,960 --> 00:12:27,620
Yeah. So, uh,
Ruben's a phlebotomist,

330
00:12:27,620 --> 00:12:30,670
draws blood for lab work,
never leaves a bruise.

331
00:12:30,670 --> 00:12:33,580
And Pablo, he's
a respiratory therapist --

332
00:12:33,580 --> 00:12:36,460
he oversees ventilators
on patients

333
00:12:36,460 --> 00:12:40,210
and, um, helps them if
they have any lung issues.
Right.

334
00:12:40,210 --> 00:12:41,750
So should you --
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

335
00:12:41,750 --> 00:12:43,500
Schmitt! Slow down!

336
00:12:43,500 --> 00:12:45,120
Huh? What's the problem?
Uh, nothing. No problem.

337
00:12:45,120 --> 00:12:46,170
All good.

338
00:12:47,750 --> 00:12:49,500
I lost a patient.

339
00:12:49,500 --> 00:12:51,420
I mean, physically.
I can't find her.

340
00:12:53,000 --> 00:12:54,330
If this story doesn't
have a happy ending,

341
00:12:54,330 --> 00:12:56,500
neither will your career.
Understand?

342
00:12:56,500 --> 00:12:57,920
Yep. I'm just gonna...

343
00:13:00,000 --> 00:13:01,290
Can I have his job?

344
00:13:01,290 --> 00:13:02,460
Losing people?

345
00:13:02,460 --> 00:13:04,460
You're not funny.

346
00:13:04,460 --> 00:13:07,080
Hayes: Think this shunt
will stop the bleeding?

347
00:13:07,080 --> 00:13:10,210
Meredith:
Well, it's our only choice
until the liver gets here.

348
00:13:10,210 --> 00:13:12,330
So, you were fired.

349
00:13:12,330 --> 00:13:14,670
And?

350
00:13:14,670 --> 00:13:17,500
And I never heard the full
story, and we have time to kill.

351
00:13:19,920 --> 00:13:22,330
I had a 4-year-old patient,

352
00:13:22,330 --> 00:13:25,120
and she did not have
health insurance,

353
00:13:25,120 --> 00:13:27,540
so I put my daughter's name
on her paperwork

354
00:13:27,540 --> 00:13:30,000
so that I could
save her life.
That's insane.

355
00:13:30,000 --> 00:13:32,290
Well, if you had seen
how sick she was --

356
00:13:32,290 --> 00:13:33,960
No, this country's
medical system is insane

357
00:13:33,960 --> 00:13:35,960
that you had to do that.

358
00:13:35,960 --> 00:13:37,830
I'd do it for more people
if I could,

359
00:13:37,830 --> 00:13:40,460
but then they would definitely
take away my license.

360
00:13:40,460 --> 00:13:43,710
Hmm.
Never seen such an early case
of cirrhosis before.

361
00:13:43,710 --> 00:13:46,120
Alpha-1-Antitrypsin
deficiency.

362
00:13:46,120 --> 00:13:48,210
Elisa's older sister
died of the same thing.

363
00:13:48,210 --> 00:13:50,790
Family's first doctor diagnosed
it from the autopsy.

364
00:13:50,790 --> 00:13:52,290
O.R. Nurse:
That was Seattle Pres.

365
00:13:52,290 --> 00:13:54,170
Dr. DeLuca just left
with the donor organ.

366
00:13:54,170 --> 00:13:56,290
On foot?
No idea.

367
00:13:58,290 --> 00:14:00,290
Alpha-1-Antitrypsin
deficiency.

368
00:14:00,290 --> 00:14:02,080
Was their first doctor
Alex Karev?

369
00:14:02,080 --> 00:14:04,460
My absentee co-chief?
Yes, it was.

370
00:14:04,460 --> 00:14:07,620
I think I remember her.
She loved comic books.

371
00:14:07,620 --> 00:14:10,080
He did a whole thing for her
on the PEDS floor.

372
00:14:10,080 --> 00:14:11,620
He was devastated
when she died.

373
00:14:11,620 --> 00:14:14,210
Well, not devastated enough
to come back and help Elisa.

374
00:14:14,210 --> 00:14:16,040
Yang spoke a lot
about Karev.

375
00:14:16,040 --> 00:14:17,670
She used to call him
the devil or something?

376
00:14:17,670 --> 00:14:19,920
Evil Spawn.
Evil Spawn. That was it.

377
00:14:21,290 --> 00:14:24,210
What did Yang
say about me?

378
00:14:24,210 --> 00:14:26,290
Nothing that I can recall.

379
00:14:26,290 --> 00:14:28,790
Hmm.

380
00:14:51,290 --> 00:14:53,120
No.

381
00:14:53,120 --> 00:14:55,500
No, no, no, no, no, no!

382
00:14:55,500 --> 00:14:57,830
Stop! Everybody.
Oh, my God, stop.

383
00:14:57,830 --> 00:14:59,750
Schmitt?! What if we'd have
been in mid-dissection?

384
00:14:59,750 --> 00:15:01,330
You could've startled
Dr. Desmond so badly

385
00:15:01,330 --> 00:15:02,960
she'd injure
the common bile duct.

386
00:15:02,960 --> 00:15:04,670
Dr. Desmond?
Who's that?

387
00:15:04,670 --> 00:15:06,210
She may not have
been your year,

388
00:15:06,210 --> 00:15:08,290
but, Schmitt, that's no excuse
for not knowing who she is.

389
00:15:08,290 --> 00:15:10,920
That's my patient,
Tess Anderson!

390
00:15:12,330 --> 00:15:13,960
Your patient?
Now, that's absurd.

391
00:15:13,960 --> 00:15:15,960
I can explain.

392
00:15:15,960 --> 00:15:17,960
Am I, um, technically
a-a patient?

393
00:15:17,960 --> 00:15:19,960
Yes. But you were the one
that brought me into the OR.

394
00:15:19,960 --> 00:15:21,500
I was just gonna stay
in the skills lab,

395
00:15:21,500 --> 00:15:24,080
but you told me to be
confident, and I also...

396
00:15:25,790 --> 00:15:27,040
Oh, not again!

397
00:15:27,040 --> 00:15:28,710
Ohh!

398
00:15:28,710 --> 00:15:30,420
Hey! Stop!

399
00:15:30,420 --> 00:15:31,290
God in heaven.

400
00:15:37,120 --> 00:15:39,330
Hey, Pierce!
Pierce, Pierce, here!

401
00:15:39,330 --> 00:15:40,580
I want you to meet,
uh, Joey Phillips.

402
00:15:40,580 --> 00:15:43,330
He is experiencing my version
of a career fair.

403
00:15:43,330 --> 00:15:45,750
Joey,
this is Dr. Maggie Pierce.

404
00:15:45,750 --> 00:15:48,620
Just like Avery, she is chief
of her own department,

405
00:15:48,620 --> 00:15:51,120
cardiothoracic surgery.
Well, technically,
I'm co-chief, right?

406
00:15:51,120 --> 00:15:53,920
I was the chief, but then
I kind of got demoted.

407
00:15:53,920 --> 00:15:57,500
After you quit and got rehired
out of the goodness of my heart.

408
00:15:57,500 --> 00:16:01,290
Which is why it is such
an honor to be co-chief,

409
00:16:01,290 --> 00:16:02,580
and I'm so proud.

410
00:16:02,580 --> 00:16:05,000
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Maggie.
Mom's in P.E.A.

411
00:16:05,000 --> 00:16:06,790
Okay, come on, come on.

412
00:16:06,790 --> 00:16:09,290
Okay. We lost her pulse.
Did we get OB?

413
00:16:09,290 --> 00:16:10,960
They got swamped with
an abruption upstairs.

414
00:16:10,960 --> 00:16:12,210
Give me that ultrasound.

415
00:16:12,210 --> 00:16:13,420
Bailey:
You know what, Joey?

416
00:16:13,420 --> 00:16:15,000
We should go check out
a calmer department.

417
00:16:15,000 --> 00:16:16,330
Is she gonna be okay?

418
00:16:16,330 --> 00:16:17,330
The rib must've
punctured her heart.

419
00:16:17,330 --> 00:16:18,920
Damn it.
Fetal heart rate's down to 80.

420
00:16:18,920 --> 00:16:20,380
I think we're out of time.

421
00:16:20,380 --> 00:16:22,290
Time for what? Use words.
You're not using words.

422
00:16:22,290 --> 00:16:23,380
Am I losing them both?

423
00:16:23,380 --> 00:16:24,580
Bailey: I'm sorry,
what's your name?

424
00:16:24,580 --> 00:16:26,000
Kendra. I'm Kendra.

425
00:16:26,000 --> 00:16:27,750
Kendra, okay, they need
to do a C-section.

426
00:16:27,750 --> 00:16:29,040
But she's only 32 weeks.

427
00:16:29,040 --> 00:16:31,420
Yeah, but her heart has been
stopped for too long,

428
00:16:31,420 --> 00:16:34,080
and if they don't deliver the
baby now, it'll be too late.

429
00:16:34,080 --> 00:16:35,710
And then they'll
help Lesley?

430
00:16:35,710 --> 00:16:37,040
Uh, I'm afraid --

431
00:16:37,040 --> 00:16:38,500
Let's get a lap
and a thoracotomy tray.

432
00:16:38,500 --> 00:16:40,290
We're gonna do a C-section
and a thoracotomy.

433
00:16:40,290 --> 00:16:42,670
Both?
Hunt, she will lose
way too much blood.

434
00:16:42,670 --> 00:16:44,710
We can give her more.
We're saving them both.

435
00:16:44,710 --> 00:16:46,290
Mom and baby, okay?

436
00:16:46,290 --> 00:16:48,000
Teddy, you take over CPR.

437
00:16:48,000 --> 00:16:49,920
I -- Hold on. Hold on.
I'm gonna prep
for a crash C-section.

438
00:16:51,460 --> 00:16:53,460
Kendra:
Joey, take her arm.

439
00:16:53,460 --> 00:16:54,420
Get her out of here.

440
00:16:54,420 --> 00:16:56,080
Come on.
Lesley, I love you.

441
00:16:56,080 --> 00:16:58,330
I'm so sorry.
I'm sorry.

442
00:17:00,170 --> 00:17:01,500
You don't have to
have me guarded.

443
00:17:01,500 --> 00:17:02,880
I'm not a lunatic.

444
00:17:02,880 --> 00:17:05,620
You almost cut into a patient
with zero qualifications.

445
00:17:05,620 --> 00:17:06,960
I spent half my life
in hospitals.

446
00:17:06,960 --> 00:17:08,960
Mm. What kind
of hospitals?

447
00:17:08,960 --> 00:17:11,380
♪ Louder now ♪
Schmitt, can you go check
on the psych eval?

448
00:17:11,380 --> 00:17:14,170
♪ It was ♪
Gladly.

449
00:17:14,170 --> 00:17:16,000
♪ Harder somehow ♪
Is there someone that
we can call for you?

450
00:17:16,000 --> 00:17:19,080
Um, friends or family?

451
00:17:19,080 --> 00:17:22,500
♪ To listen to the silence ♪
No one who'd come out
in a blizzard.

452
00:17:22,500 --> 00:17:25,880
Tess,
what were you thinking?

453
00:17:25,880 --> 00:17:27,460
♪ Lights go down ♪
I got caught.
It doesn't matter.

454
00:17:27,460 --> 00:17:30,380
♪ Chains get ♪
Well, it matters to me.

455
00:17:30,380 --> 00:17:32,500
♪ Tighter now ♪
I have
adrenocortical carcinoma.

456
00:17:32,500 --> 00:17:34,790
Which is extremely treatable
at your stage.

457
00:17:34,790 --> 00:17:36,420
♪ Drowning in the quiet ♪
Yeah, so I've heard.

458
00:17:36,420 --> 00:17:39,580
First time you get sick,
everyone's there for you.

459
00:17:39,580 --> 00:17:42,620
Kids
at school who hated me...
♪ Waiting ♪

460
00:17:42,620 --> 00:17:46,120
♪ I was ♪
...came to the hospital
and apologized and cried.

461
00:17:46,120 --> 00:17:48,250
♪ Waiting ♪
Not so much the second time
or the third.

462
00:17:48,250 --> 00:17:51,290
This is my fourth type
of cancer in eight years.

463
00:17:51,290 --> 00:17:53,960
♪ Waiting to break free ♪
In high school, I was
so inspired by the doctors,

464
00:17:53,960 --> 00:17:55,420
I decided to become one,

465
00:17:55,420 --> 00:17:57,750
to become the people
who saved my life.

466
00:17:57,750 --> 00:18:00,210
♪ Waiting I was ♪

467
00:18:00,210 --> 00:18:02,670
Got diagnosed the third time
in med school.

468
00:18:02,670 --> 00:18:05,750
♪ Waiting ♪
Recovery took a year,
drained my college fund.

469
00:18:05,750 --> 00:18:07,620
♪ Waiting... ♪
Now I'm a barista.

470
00:18:07,620 --> 00:18:11,460
♪ ...to break free ♪

471
00:18:11,460 --> 00:18:14,880
And when I was getting sick,
everyone else just kept living.

472
00:18:14,880 --> 00:18:17,380
Graduating, matching.

473
00:18:17,380 --> 00:18:20,920
They all got to live their dream
while I just sat here.

474
00:18:20,920 --> 00:18:23,880
♪ Can't let go ♪

475
00:18:23,880 --> 00:18:25,170
And then, one night,
it snowed.

476
00:18:25,170 --> 00:18:27,210
♪ But no one knows ♪

477
00:18:27,210 --> 00:18:29,620
It snowed so much
almost no one was here.

478
00:18:29,620 --> 00:18:33,580
♪ The struggle
in the darkness ♪
And everything looked new.

479
00:18:33,580 --> 00:18:36,830
And I thought,
"What if I were new?"

480
00:18:36,830 --> 00:18:40,540
♪ Locked away ♪
"What if I got to live
my dream just once?"

481
00:18:40,540 --> 00:18:43,080
♪ Fires fade ♪
"Just for a day.

482
00:18:43,080 --> 00:18:45,460
How would it feel?"

483
00:18:45,460 --> 00:18:47,040
♪ Hope burns... ♪
Felt great, by the way.

484
00:18:47,040 --> 00:18:49,170
♪ ...in the distance ♪
Escaping.

485
00:18:49,170 --> 00:18:51,000
Dr. Webber, you paged?

486
00:18:51,000 --> 00:18:52,830
Uh, yes, I need you
to scrub in with me...

487
00:18:52,830 --> 00:18:54,380
♪ Waiting ♪
...for Ms. Gutierrez's
lap chole.

488
00:18:54,380 --> 00:18:56,000
♪ I was ♪
Wow. Thank you.

489
00:18:56,000 --> 00:19:00,170
♪ Waiting ♪

490
00:19:00,170 --> 00:19:01,790
What happened?
♪ Waiting... ♪

491
00:19:01,790 --> 00:19:05,460
Uh...it doesn't
concern you.
♪ ...to break free ♪

492
00:19:07,960 --> 00:19:09,880
♪ Waiting ♪

493
00:19:09,880 --> 00:19:12,750
♪ I was waiting ♪

494
00:19:12,750 --> 00:19:16,250
Second round of epi is in.
Are we ready?

495
00:19:16,250 --> 00:19:20,120
Okay, here we go, Lesley.
♪ Waiting to break free ♪

496
00:19:24,120 --> 00:19:25,380
♪ Waiting I was ♪

497
00:19:25,380 --> 00:19:27,380
When's the last time
you did a C-section?

498
00:19:27,380 --> 00:19:30,460
♪ Waiting ♪
This is just a normal laparotomy
with a...baby inside.

499
00:19:30,460 --> 00:19:32,790
Did we page
the NICU team yet?
They're on their way.

500
00:19:32,790 --> 00:19:34,120
♪ Waiting to break free ♪
We have seconds before
we lose both of them.

501
00:19:34,120 --> 00:19:35,500
We have a liver lac,

502
00:19:35,500 --> 00:19:36,790
I need you to be on standby
with the laps.

503
00:19:36,790 --> 00:19:38,000
Owen, you need to cut.

504
00:19:38,000 --> 00:19:40,330
-Okay.
-Stopping compressions.

505
00:19:40,330 --> 00:19:41,880
♪ Waiting ♪

506
00:19:41,880 --> 00:19:44,080
♪ I was ♪
My turn. Stop CPR.

507
00:19:44,080 --> 00:19:45,500
♪ Waiting... ♪
Retractor.

508
00:19:45,500 --> 00:19:49,000
♪ ...to break free ♪

509
00:19:49,000 --> 00:19:51,250
No response from Dr. DeLuca.

510
00:19:51,250 --> 00:19:52,920
He left over an hour ago.

511
00:19:52,920 --> 00:19:54,670
Should I not have
trusted him to go?

512
00:19:54,670 --> 00:19:56,330
Suture scissors.

513
00:19:58,170 --> 00:20:00,620
Okay.
So, why Switzerland?

514
00:20:00,620 --> 00:20:02,120
What?
We have time to kill.

515
00:20:02,120 --> 00:20:03,380
Why did you move
to Switzerland?

516
00:20:03,380 --> 00:20:06,000
I sort of ran away.
When my wife died.

517
00:20:06,000 --> 00:20:08,710
Took my kids and went to the
furthest place I could think of.

518
00:20:10,620 --> 00:20:12,710
Don't usually get a
laugh when I tell that one.

519
00:20:12,710 --> 00:20:15,540
Uh, I'm sorry, it's just that
I did the same exact thing.

520
00:20:20,250 --> 00:20:21,750
Where'd you run to?

521
00:20:21,750 --> 00:20:23,830
San Diego.

522
00:20:23,830 --> 00:20:25,460
No idea why.

523
00:20:25,460 --> 00:20:27,500
Hmm.

524
00:20:27,500 --> 00:20:30,290
When your husband died,
was it fast or was it slow?

525
00:20:30,290 --> 00:20:32,120
Fast, very fast.

526
00:20:33,960 --> 00:20:35,540
You?
Unbearably slow.

527
00:20:35,540 --> 00:20:37,830
Years.

528
00:20:37,830 --> 00:20:39,580
Everyone says
it gets easier.

529
00:20:43,540 --> 00:20:46,210
Well, it does
and it doesn't.

530
00:20:46,210 --> 00:20:49,460
I mean,
the firsts are tough.

531
00:20:49,460 --> 00:20:51,750
And just when you feel like
you're starting to heal --

532
00:20:51,750 --> 00:20:53,210
First time Liam got
a stomach bug,

533
00:20:53,210 --> 00:20:55,040
I nearly had
to be committed.

534
00:20:55,040 --> 00:20:57,420
15 years of medical training
out the window.

535
00:20:57,420 --> 00:21:00,290
First anniversary,
first birthdays...

536
00:21:02,000 --> 00:21:03,080
First kiss.

537
00:21:04,920 --> 00:21:06,210
Haven't had that one yet.

538
00:21:07,290 --> 00:21:09,880
Okay, I'm back.
I got it.

539
00:21:09,880 --> 00:21:13,120
Here. Here.
I got it.

540
00:21:13,120 --> 00:21:15,830
Dr. DeLuca,
tell me you wore gloves.

541
00:21:15,830 --> 00:21:17,620
Okay. I wore gloves.

542
00:21:17,620 --> 00:21:19,880
Let's page
Dr. Avery right now.

543
00:21:19,880 --> 00:21:21,750
And let's prep
for this transplant!

544
00:21:29,330 --> 00:21:31,960
Everyone is overexaggerating,
okay?

545
00:21:31,960 --> 00:21:33,670
We're taking away resources from
actual patients that need us.

546
00:21:33,670 --> 00:21:34,710
Stop.

547
00:21:41,880 --> 00:21:43,290
Jackson: Simms, I need
a rewarming basin

548
00:21:43,290 --> 00:21:45,080
set up at 100 degrees
with saline,

549
00:21:45,080 --> 00:21:47,790
warming blanket,
and I want tPA on standby

550
00:21:47,790 --> 00:21:49,380
just in case we end up
needing it.
On it.

551
00:21:49,380 --> 00:21:50,330
No. Stop.
This is ridiculous.

552
00:21:50,330 --> 00:21:51,380
I need to treat patients.

553
00:21:51,380 --> 00:21:53,500
You're not treating patients
like this.

554
00:21:53,500 --> 00:21:55,880
W-Who are you gonna treat?
You're not a doctor right now.

555
00:21:55,880 --> 00:21:57,460
Can -- Can we get my sister
out of here, please?

556
00:21:57,460 --> 00:21:58,540
DeLuca, I've been
doing this all day,

557
00:21:58,540 --> 00:22:00,120
so I need you to listen close.

558
00:22:00,120 --> 00:22:02,330
If you do not let me treat you
exactly the way I need to,

559
00:22:02,330 --> 00:22:04,380
you will lose one or both
of your hands,

560
00:22:04,380 --> 00:22:06,000
and your future as
a surgeon, okay?

561
00:22:06,000 --> 00:22:07,670
So sit tight, shut the hell up,
and let me get you thawed out.

562
00:22:12,880 --> 00:22:15,790
A rib has punctured
the pericardium.

563
00:22:15,790 --> 00:22:17,460
Teddy: It feels like
one big clot.

564
00:22:17,460 --> 00:22:19,460
She's tamponading --
the heart has no room to beat.

565
00:22:19,460 --> 00:22:21,040
We're gonna have
to open her up.
Metz.

566
00:22:21,040 --> 00:22:23,380
How are you doing?
Okay. Where's that warmer?

567
00:22:23,380 --> 00:22:27,000
-Okay. Alright.

568
00:22:27,000 --> 00:22:28,750
Okay, here we go.

569
00:22:28,750 --> 00:22:31,420
Okay.

570
00:22:31,420 --> 00:22:33,080
Okay.

571
00:22:35,380 --> 00:22:36,960
Okay.

572
00:22:38,080 --> 00:22:40,460
Okay, starting compressions.

573
00:22:40,460 --> 00:22:43,880
Come on, come on, come on,
come on, come on.

574
00:22:43,880 --> 00:22:46,460
I'm gonna need a neonatal
intubation tray.

575
00:22:46,460 --> 00:22:48,620
Come on, come on, come on.
Come on, come on.

576
00:22:48,620 --> 00:22:51,290
I asked her not to
leave the house.

577
00:22:51,290 --> 00:22:53,670
I asked her not to go.

578
00:22:53,670 --> 00:22:55,880
Hey...

579
00:22:55,880 --> 00:22:58,500
You know, pregnant women
have a stubborn streak.

580
00:22:59,880 --> 00:23:03,040
Yeah, but this
isn't normal, right?

581
00:23:03,040 --> 00:23:06,170
I mean, having heart surgery
and delivering a baby?

582
00:23:06,170 --> 00:23:08,000
Have you ever seen this?

583
00:23:10,250 --> 00:23:12,790
Y--
I-I'll go check on her.

584
00:23:12,790 --> 00:23:14,540
Hey, stay right here.

585
00:23:21,040 --> 00:23:22,880
Her bleeding has stopped
with the shunt,

586
00:23:22,880 --> 00:23:24,500
and we did a successful
transplant.

587
00:23:24,500 --> 00:23:25,830
Her numbers are improving.

588
00:23:25,830 --> 00:23:27,920
So...she's okay.
Elisa's okay?

589
00:23:27,920 --> 00:23:28,960
She's gonna be okay.

590
00:23:31,120 --> 00:23:33,040
We'd like to thank the doctor
who went out in the snow

591
00:23:33,040 --> 00:23:34,290
to get the liver.
Do you know where he is?

592
00:23:34,290 --> 00:23:35,960
Oh, he's warming up.

593
00:23:35,960 --> 00:23:38,040
You've all been so...

594
00:23:38,040 --> 00:23:39,500
Thank you. Thank you.

595
00:23:39,500 --> 00:23:40,540
Mm-hmm.

596
00:23:40,540 --> 00:23:42,380
Thank you.

597
00:23:49,380 --> 00:23:52,540
Oh, God.
Is there an update?

598
00:23:52,540 --> 00:23:55,330
I just pulled a huge clot
out of her pericardium,

599
00:23:55,330 --> 00:23:57,080
and now I'm massaging --
Teddy:
Wait, hold compressions.

600
00:23:57,080 --> 00:23:58,580
Let's see if we have a rhythm.

601
00:24:03,210 --> 00:24:05,830
Maggie: Alright, let's pack her
and get her to the OR.

602
00:24:05,830 --> 00:24:08,750
Uh, Hunt?
Baby's intubated,
two rounds of epi.

603
00:24:08,750 --> 00:24:11,210
Just hold on,
just...give it a second.

604
00:24:20,710 --> 00:24:22,170
It's a girl.

605
00:24:22,170 --> 00:24:25,120
Bailey: Dear God.

606
00:24:25,120 --> 00:24:26,750
You guys...

607
00:24:26,750 --> 00:24:28,420
Okay.

608
00:24:28,420 --> 00:24:29,920
Joey!

609
00:24:29,920 --> 00:24:31,880
He brought them both back.

610
00:24:31,880 --> 00:24:33,460
Awesome.

611
00:24:33,460 --> 00:24:36,830
He's right, Hunt.
Everybody, this was awesome.

612
00:24:38,000 --> 00:24:39,670
-It was, wasn't it?
-Oh!

613
00:24:58,500 --> 00:24:59,960
Careful.

614
00:24:59,960 --> 00:25:02,040
Avery's trying to
save DeLuca's hands

615
00:25:02,040 --> 00:25:03,580
because he played outside
for too long.

616
00:25:03,580 --> 00:25:05,250
How did you know
I was out here?

617
00:25:05,250 --> 00:25:08,120
A little blinking
beacon in my brain

618
00:25:08,120 --> 00:25:09,580
tells me where you are
at all times.

619
00:25:09,580 --> 00:25:11,460
That was creepy.
Even for me.

620
00:25:11,460 --> 00:25:14,920
No, I -- I came down
from the ER with cocoa,

621
00:25:14,920 --> 00:25:17,120
and I saw you walk
out of trauma one.

622
00:25:17,120 --> 00:25:18,250
Looked like
an unbelievable save.

623
00:25:18,250 --> 00:25:19,790
Here. Here.

624
00:25:19,790 --> 00:25:20,830
Thanks.

625
00:25:20,830 --> 00:25:23,330
Everything okay?

626
00:25:23,330 --> 00:25:25,620
Yeah, I'm just, uh...

627
00:25:25,620 --> 00:25:29,380
I'm just, uh...trying
to quiet my mind.

628
00:25:29,380 --> 00:25:31,120
You know, I've had this fear
for a couple months,

629
00:25:31,120 --> 00:25:32,540
and I'm just, uh...

630
00:25:34,500 --> 00:25:36,580
Just worried that it
might be coming true.

631
00:25:36,580 --> 00:25:37,710
What's that?

632
00:25:37,710 --> 00:25:39,420
Well, I'm just --

633
00:25:39,420 --> 00:25:42,620
I'm worried that Owen is
the father of Amelia's baby.

634
00:25:42,620 --> 00:25:45,540
Which is crazy,
probably, right? That --

635
00:25:45,540 --> 00:25:48,250
But it -- it --
I just -- I can't shake it.

636
00:25:48,250 --> 00:25:49,750
It's the first thing
that went through my mind

637
00:25:49,750 --> 00:25:51,830
when I heard that Amelia
was pregnant.

638
00:25:51,830 --> 00:25:53,580
W-Why -- Why do you
think that is?

639
00:25:53,580 --> 00:25:55,830
Because I'm broken, maybe?

640
00:25:57,500 --> 00:26:02,080
'Cause I can't trust that things
will work out 'cause...

641
00:26:02,080 --> 00:26:04,250
Because maybe
I'm afraid that --

642
00:26:04,250 --> 00:26:06,420
that he'll always
be in love with Amelia.

643
00:26:06,420 --> 00:26:08,830
That's a terrible feeling,

644
00:26:08,830 --> 00:26:10,290
thinking somebody
you're in love with

645
00:26:10,290 --> 00:26:11,750
is pining
for someone else.

646
00:26:11,750 --> 00:26:15,250
I mean...trust me, I know.

647
00:26:15,250 --> 00:26:17,620
But, hey...

648
00:26:17,620 --> 00:26:18,960
Come on. I...

649
00:26:18,960 --> 00:26:21,330
I've seen Owen with you.

650
00:26:21,330 --> 00:26:23,290
That man's clearly
in love with you.

651
00:26:23,290 --> 00:26:26,620
It's seeping out of his
ruddy little pores.

652
00:26:26,620 --> 00:26:27,920
Trust me,
I'd be the first one

653
00:26:27,920 --> 00:26:29,960
to tell you otherwise.

654
00:26:34,880 --> 00:26:36,670
Mm.

655
00:26:36,670 --> 00:26:38,330
You're a good man, Tom.

656
00:26:38,330 --> 00:26:40,290
Oh, God.

657
00:26:40,290 --> 00:26:42,830
You're the only person here
who thinks that.

658
00:26:42,830 --> 00:26:46,580
I-I know people
dislike me.

659
00:26:46,580 --> 00:26:48,420
Strongly.

660
00:26:48,420 --> 00:26:51,330
And I know I don't show it,
but, uh, I think I hate it.

661
00:26:51,330 --> 00:26:54,290
And...they're all
part of a club,

662
00:26:54,290 --> 00:26:57,120
and they won't
have me join.

663
00:26:57,120 --> 00:26:58,750
And I've been trying
for two years.

664
00:27:00,000 --> 00:27:01,460
Well,
I don't dislike you.

665
00:27:01,460 --> 00:27:02,960
Hmm.

666
00:27:02,960 --> 00:27:04,710
I'd even say I like you.

667
00:27:05,670 --> 00:27:06,790
Hm.

668
00:27:06,790 --> 00:27:09,120
A lot.
Hmm.

669
00:27:09,120 --> 00:27:10,790
Hmm.

670
00:27:10,790 --> 00:27:13,380
What are you doing?
What?

671
00:27:13,380 --> 00:27:15,380
Oh, that look, I --
That look is --

672
00:27:15,380 --> 00:27:17,080
No, there's no look!
You always have a look.

673
00:27:17,080 --> 00:27:18,540
No. No look.

674
00:27:18,540 --> 00:27:20,080
Oh.
There's no look.

675
00:27:20,080 --> 00:27:21,670
♪ I went home ♪
I don't -- No, that's --
Oh, that --

676
00:27:21,670 --> 00:27:23,290
Oh.

677
00:27:23,290 --> 00:27:24,920
♪ And I stood in the garden
looking on ♪
Tom! Oh!

678
00:27:24,920 --> 00:27:27,460
You are a dead man!

679
00:27:27,460 --> 00:27:28,920
Don't. Don't!
You wait. Oh, yes.

680
00:27:28,920 --> 00:27:31,000
Don't -- Don't do it.
Don't --

681
00:27:31,000 --> 00:27:35,420
♪ At where my dog
used to reside ♪

682
00:27:35,420 --> 00:27:37,420
♪ And I started thinking
about your eyes ♪
These hands are insured!

683
00:27:37,420 --> 00:27:40,120
Psych says that she's
not a flight risk,

684
00:27:40,120 --> 00:27:42,710
so I moved her
surgery to tomorrow.

685
00:27:42,710 --> 00:27:43,750
Thanks.

686
00:27:43,750 --> 00:27:45,620
♪ Deep water ♪

687
00:27:49,290 --> 00:27:51,080
♪ I walk in ♪
Ms. Gutierrez is okay.

688
00:27:51,080 --> 00:27:53,330
You here to rub it in?

689
00:27:53,330 --> 00:27:55,170
♪ And I cook with
my mother once more ♪
No, I'm here because
after the surgery,

690
00:27:55,170 --> 00:27:56,580
she asked where
the doctor was

691
00:27:56,580 --> 00:27:59,040
that had the nice things
to say about the animals.

692
00:27:59,040 --> 00:28:01,670
♪ And she'll peel the onion ♪
Did you tell her
I'm in a straitjacket?

693
00:28:01,670 --> 00:28:04,250
I said that Dr. Desmond
was with another patient.

694
00:28:04,250 --> 00:28:06,420
♪ And she'll ask me
why I never call ♪
Desmond.

695
00:28:06,420 --> 00:28:09,250
Sounds like something
out of a soap opera.

696
00:28:09,250 --> 00:28:11,500
♪ Why my pride only arrives
before I fall? ♪
I'm such an idiot.

697
00:28:11,500 --> 00:28:14,080
My dream was to
be a surgeon, too.

698
00:28:14,080 --> 00:28:15,960
Yeah, well, lucky you.

699
00:28:15,960 --> 00:28:18,500
You really want to get into a
contest about obstacles with me?

700
00:28:18,500 --> 00:28:20,170
♪ Oh, the man that I was ♪

701
00:28:20,170 --> 00:28:23,250
What I was saying was my dream
was a lot harder

702
00:28:23,250 --> 00:28:25,580
than it was for
other people.

703
00:28:25,580 --> 00:28:29,380
But I stuck with it,
and I made it come true.

704
00:28:29,380 --> 00:28:30,250
♪ And the boy
that I have become ♪

705
00:28:30,250 --> 00:28:31,920
If you can survive
four cancers...

706
00:28:31,920 --> 00:28:33,250
♪ I wanna run ♪

707
00:28:33,250 --> 00:28:35,620
...you can finish
med school.

708
00:28:35,620 --> 00:28:39,120
♪ Just like the times before
and the times before ♪

709
00:28:42,250 --> 00:28:46,120
You know why I asked you
to be my hands today?

710
00:28:46,120 --> 00:28:48,500
Some teaching crap,
I guess.

711
00:28:48,500 --> 00:28:51,080
♪ Down that ancient corridor ♪

712
00:28:56,330 --> 00:28:58,040
What is it?
Parkinson's?

713
00:28:58,040 --> 00:28:59,080
♪ When I get home ♪

714
00:28:59,080 --> 00:29:00,960
Yeah, it could be.

715
00:29:00,960 --> 00:29:02,500
Or old age, I'm not sure.

716
00:29:02,500 --> 00:29:04,250
♪ I'll throw my arms
'round my sister ♪

717
00:29:04,250 --> 00:29:05,750
♪ And let her know... ♪
There are treatments
for that now. Medications.

718
00:29:05,750 --> 00:29:08,120
They're even working on
some brain surgeries that --

719
00:29:08,120 --> 00:29:09,500
♪ ...that "I'm sorry
I missed your birthday" ♪
There's no treatment
that can let me

720
00:29:09,500 --> 00:29:12,330
keep doing what
I love most.

721
00:29:12,330 --> 00:29:15,790
♪ And I know that
you raised me and all ♪
This job defined me.

722
00:29:15,790 --> 00:29:19,460
More than any relationship,
any illness.

723
00:29:19,460 --> 00:29:22,580
♪ But we both watched
that wine glass fall ♪
And if I can't do it
anymore, then...

724
00:29:22,580 --> 00:29:24,290
You were right earlier,

725
00:29:24,290 --> 00:29:26,540
this is the greatest job
on the planet.

726
00:29:26,540 --> 00:29:28,380
♪ Oh, the man that I was ♪
And if I thought there
was even a chance

727
00:29:28,380 --> 00:29:30,540
that I could get
to operate again,

728
00:29:30,540 --> 00:29:32,880
I would move heaven and earth
to make it happen.

729
00:29:32,880 --> 00:29:34,750
So you can give up,
but I can't?

730
00:29:34,750 --> 00:29:36,210
♪ And the boy I have become ♪
No, there
is a big difference

731
00:29:36,210 --> 00:29:38,460
between throwing in the towel
after a fight

732
00:29:38,460 --> 00:29:40,500
and before
the fight even started.

733
00:29:40,500 --> 00:29:41,750
♪ I wanna run ♪

734
00:29:43,880 --> 00:29:48,250
♪ Just like the times before
and the times before ♪

735
00:29:50,580 --> 00:29:52,960
No, you -- you can't.
♪ And you'll say ♪

736
00:29:52,960 --> 00:29:57,000
Ah, I don't need it
anymore.
♪ Where do you go wandering? ♪

737
00:29:57,000 --> 00:30:00,000
♪ Well, I ♪

738
00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:05,250
But I really hope you do.
♪ I am the only son
of the falling snow ♪

739
00:30:18,580 --> 00:30:21,580
Jackson: And this will help
with the pain.
DeLuca: It doesn't hurt,
actually.

740
00:30:21,580 --> 00:30:23,710
It will. I mean, none of
your blisters are open now,

741
00:30:23,710 --> 00:30:24,960
but there's a very
strong chance

742
00:30:24,960 --> 00:30:26,580
I'm gonna need to
debride in the OR.

743
00:30:26,580 --> 00:30:28,290
And, DeLuca,
I can't stress this enough --

744
00:30:28,290 --> 00:30:30,330
the next 12 hours
are critical.

745
00:30:33,170 --> 00:30:34,540
-Thank you.
-Thank you.
-Mm-hmm.

746
00:30:34,540 --> 00:30:36,710
I'm not really in the mood
for visitors.

747
00:30:36,710 --> 00:30:40,670
Andrew, that little girl
is alive because of you.

748
00:30:40,670 --> 00:30:42,830
So I just wanted
you to know that.

749
00:30:42,830 --> 00:30:44,500
I do know that.

750
00:30:44,500 --> 00:30:46,670
And I also know that
if you'd had it your way,

751
00:30:46,670 --> 00:30:47,830
I wouldn't have
gone out there,

752
00:30:47,830 --> 00:30:49,330
and that little girl
would be dead.

753
00:30:49,330 --> 00:30:51,580
So I guess you're thanking me
for not listening to you.

754
00:30:52,920 --> 00:30:56,000
Andrea, we were just
worried about you.

755
00:30:57,880 --> 00:31:01,750
Okay, this is just
like when Papa --

756
00:31:01,750 --> 00:31:04,330
I'm not him, okay?!
I'm not him!

757
00:31:04,330 --> 00:31:06,290
For the first time
in my career,

758
00:31:06,290 --> 00:31:08,710
I'm succeeding on my own,
without anybody's help.

759
00:31:08,710 --> 00:31:11,000
Why can't you just be happy
for me and accept that?

760
00:31:11,000 --> 00:31:12,620
Why -- Why -- Why you do
you always got to accuse me

761
00:31:12,620 --> 00:31:15,170
of -- of not being well?
Because there's
a history --

762
00:31:15,170 --> 00:31:16,710
Okay, well I don't accuse you
of having Alzheimer's

763
00:31:16,710 --> 00:31:18,170
every time you
forget something, do I?

764
00:31:20,210 --> 00:31:21,330
You know, you can go,
Meredith.

765
00:31:21,330 --> 00:31:23,210
Please, just --
just leave.

766
00:31:38,210 --> 00:31:40,960
Sorry. I had
a couple of fires to put out.

767
00:31:40,960 --> 00:31:43,500
That's a chief's job.

768
00:31:43,500 --> 00:31:45,250
Did the baby's mom
make it?

769
00:31:45,250 --> 00:31:48,210
She did.
Lesley's in the ICU.

770
00:31:48,210 --> 00:31:49,960
Was that woman right?

771
00:31:49,960 --> 00:31:51,460
This doesn't
usually happen?

772
00:31:51,460 --> 00:31:54,670
It definitely does not.

773
00:31:54,670 --> 00:31:57,380
That might have been the coolest
thing I've ever seen.

774
00:31:59,080 --> 00:32:01,670
Me, too.

775
00:32:06,880 --> 00:32:09,250
Hey, c-come home with me.

776
00:32:09,250 --> 00:32:10,960
With my family.

777
00:32:10,960 --> 00:32:13,170
What?
Come to my house.

778
00:32:13,170 --> 00:32:15,120
Stay while you finish
high school,

779
00:32:15,120 --> 00:32:17,120
while we fill out
your college applications.

780
00:32:17,120 --> 00:32:21,040
And after you've been
away at school,

781
00:32:21,040 --> 00:32:23,750
come back and eat
Thanksgiving dinner

782
00:32:23,750 --> 00:32:25,540
and -- and do your
laundry.

783
00:32:25,540 --> 00:32:29,500
And maybe talk about
what career you want.

784
00:32:29,500 --> 00:32:31,330
Look, I don't need money
from the county.

785
00:32:31,330 --> 00:32:33,120
That's not what
this is about.

786
00:32:33,120 --> 00:32:36,210
I have an extra room,
extra food,

787
00:32:36,210 --> 00:32:39,500
extra...love to give.

788
00:32:39,500 --> 00:32:40,960
I...

789
00:32:40,960 --> 00:32:43,580
I have a son who loves
to play video games.

790
00:32:43,580 --> 00:32:49,580
And a husband who...will
understand eventually.

791
00:32:51,460 --> 00:32:53,290
You're serious?

792
00:32:53,290 --> 00:32:55,290
When have you known me
to not to be serious?

793
00:32:57,540 --> 00:32:58,960
Yeah.

794
00:32:58,960 --> 00:33:02,040
Yeah.
I'd like that.

795
00:33:02,040 --> 00:33:04,580
You --

796
00:33:04,580 --> 00:33:06,880
Okay. Yeah.

797
00:33:06,880 --> 00:33:08,710
Okay.

798
00:33:10,540 --> 00:33:11,960
Alright.

799
00:33:15,120 --> 00:33:18,670
Thank you.
Thank you so much.

800
00:33:23,790 --> 00:33:25,710
Hi.

801
00:33:30,080 --> 00:33:33,620
I've seen her,
sweetheart.

802
00:33:33,620 --> 00:33:36,710
I've seen our little girl.

803
00:33:36,710 --> 00:33:40,120
And she is...

804
00:33:40,120 --> 00:33:42,460
she is so you.

805
00:33:53,380 --> 00:33:54,620
Can I give this to you?

806
00:33:54,620 --> 00:33:56,000
Thank you.

807
00:33:56,000 --> 00:33:57,330
Maggie, I have
a favor to ask you.

808
00:33:57,330 --> 00:33:58,460
Sure...

809
00:34:00,380 --> 00:34:02,710
I know that Amelia just took
some personal time.

810
00:34:02,710 --> 00:34:04,540
And I know that Link is having
a terrible time with it.

811
00:34:04,540 --> 00:34:06,330
And I -- I know that

812
00:34:06,330 --> 00:34:08,580
I have this feeling
that I can't shake,

813
00:34:08,580 --> 00:34:10,330
but has something to do
with Owen.

814
00:34:12,330 --> 00:34:13,790
I know that you're
Amelia's sister,

815
00:34:13,790 --> 00:34:15,080
and that your allegiance
is to her,

816
00:34:15,080 --> 00:34:17,250
and I deeply respect that.

817
00:34:17,250 --> 00:34:19,000
And I'm not asking you to tell
me everything that you know,

818
00:34:19,000 --> 00:34:20,830
but I am asking you...

819
00:34:20,830 --> 00:34:22,670
Am I crazy?

820
00:34:22,670 --> 00:34:26,120
Am I seeing things that --
that -- that aren't there?

821
00:34:29,790 --> 00:34:31,290
You're not crazy.

822
00:34:46,500 --> 00:34:49,170
-Hey.
-Ah.

823
00:34:49,170 --> 00:34:51,580
Uh, the rigs got the all-clear,
so I just --

824
00:34:51,580 --> 00:34:56,620
we just dropped off the guy
with the amputated foot.

825
00:34:56,620 --> 00:34:58,960
Uh, JJ gave birth at the station
in the bathroom.

826
00:34:58,960 --> 00:35:00,420
Wow, that's, um --

827
00:35:00,420 --> 00:35:02,460
But she's good.
She's good, and the baby's good.

828
00:35:02,460 --> 00:35:04,880
So...
I'm sorry, Vic.

829
00:35:04,880 --> 00:35:07,500
I'm -- Look, I'm sorry
we had our first fight.

830
00:35:07,500 --> 00:35:09,670
I'm sorry I...

831
00:35:09,670 --> 00:35:10,790
God, I'm too tired
to remember.

832
00:35:10,790 --> 00:35:12,880
But I -- I am sorry.

833
00:35:14,540 --> 00:35:16,210
I'm sorry, too.

834
00:35:16,210 --> 00:35:18,380
It was stupid.

835
00:35:18,380 --> 00:35:20,000
I'm pretty sure
I was stupid, but...

836
00:35:20,000 --> 00:35:21,210
Not touching that.
Yeah.

837
00:35:21,210 --> 00:35:23,580
I know better than that.

838
00:35:23,580 --> 00:35:25,170
Meet you at your place?
Yeah.

839
00:35:25,170 --> 00:35:26,250
We could have
our second fight.

840
00:35:26,250 --> 00:35:27,670
Oh, it's too soon.

841
00:35:35,170 --> 00:35:36,620
Find your patient?

842
00:35:36,620 --> 00:35:39,080
Yeah, and she got to do
more medicine than I did

843
00:35:39,080 --> 00:35:41,290
because she impersonated
a surgeon.

844
00:35:41,290 --> 00:35:43,380
She could have
killed somebody.

845
00:35:49,460 --> 00:35:51,790
Nico, you're silencing me
with sex.

846
00:35:51,790 --> 00:35:56,290
And it's really amazing sex,
but it's becoming all we do.

847
00:35:56,290 --> 00:35:58,210
And I understand if
you're not ready

848
00:35:58,210 --> 00:35:59,750
to talk about your parents.

849
00:35:59,750 --> 00:36:05,500
But I want a relationship,
not an impersonation.

850
00:36:05,500 --> 00:36:07,620
And this...it doesn't
feel real.

851
00:36:07,620 --> 00:36:08,750
Okay, look.

852
00:36:08,750 --> 00:36:10,170
Uh, Levi...

853
00:36:10,170 --> 00:36:13,290
I'm not you.

854
00:36:13,290 --> 00:36:15,710
I don't like talking
about feelings,

855
00:36:15,710 --> 00:36:17,080
I don't like to "dive deep."

856
00:36:17,080 --> 00:36:20,540
I like to show up
and just...be together.

857
00:36:20,540 --> 00:36:23,420
And I accept all
your feelings talk

858
00:36:23,420 --> 00:36:24,500
and whatever,
all of you.

859
00:36:24,500 --> 00:36:26,420
I accept you.

860
00:36:26,420 --> 00:36:29,210
I don't try to change you.

861
00:36:29,210 --> 00:36:31,620
But you can't stop
trying to change me.

862
00:36:35,000 --> 00:36:37,830
So, this is all I have to give.
This right here, Levi --

863
00:36:37,830 --> 00:36:39,170
This is who I am.

864
00:36:41,380 --> 00:36:43,170
And if I'm really
not enough for you, then...

865
00:36:45,120 --> 00:36:46,460
Wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait, wait.

866
00:36:46,460 --> 00:36:47,750
Don't go.

867
00:36:47,750 --> 00:36:49,250
I love you.

868
00:36:49,250 --> 00:36:51,420
I -- I accept you.
Don't go.

869
00:36:51,420 --> 00:36:57,330
♪ My hands are cold,
but steady ♪

870
00:37:01,250 --> 00:37:05,330
♪ I hold my breath ♪
Hey.

871
00:37:05,330 --> 00:37:10,250
♪ When the air gets heavy ♪

872
00:37:10,250 --> 00:37:14,330
♪ Looking for a sign ♪

873
00:37:14,330 --> 00:37:19,000
♪ Before I lose my grip ♪
Okay, no need to take it
out on the door,

874
00:37:19,000 --> 00:37:21,040
I'm coming, I'm coming,
coming, coming, coming.

875
00:37:22,380 --> 00:37:26,620
Hold on.
♪ This is how it goes ♪

876
00:37:26,620 --> 00:37:28,250
Oh.

877
00:37:28,250 --> 00:37:29,620
♪ This is how it goes ♪
I was just kidding.
I, uh --

878
00:37:29,620 --> 00:37:31,120
I love the way you knock.

879
00:37:31,120 --> 00:37:32,460
Never change --

880
00:37:32,460 --> 00:37:34,960
♪ This is how it goes ♪

881
00:37:38,120 --> 00:37:41,080
♪ This is how ♪

882
00:37:41,080 --> 00:37:43,670
♪ This is how ♪
Meredith: Right after a storm,
I would run outside.

883
00:37:43,670 --> 00:37:46,210
♪ This is how it goes ♪
Whether it was the air or
the fresh blanket of snow...

884
00:37:46,210 --> 00:37:48,710
♪ I need something
to believe in ♪
...it always felt magical.

885
00:37:48,710 --> 00:37:49,670
Or new.

886
00:37:49,670 --> 00:37:51,250
Hey.
Hey.

887
00:37:51,250 --> 00:37:52,330
Finally stopped snowing,
so I ran out

888
00:37:52,330 --> 00:37:53,790
and made an executive
decision about dinner.

889
00:37:53,790 --> 00:37:56,170
Oh.
Chicken noodle soup
from Harry's.

890
00:37:56,170 --> 00:37:57,620
♪ I need something
worth the kneeling ♪
You know, with the bagel chips
you like.

891
00:37:57,620 --> 00:37:58,830
Oh, wait, wait.

892
00:37:58,830 --> 00:38:00,210
Ben.

893
00:38:00,210 --> 00:38:01,750
Are you, uh...

894
00:38:01,750 --> 00:38:02,920
♪ This is how it goes ♪
Everything okay?

895
00:38:02,920 --> 00:38:05,420
Everything's great!

896
00:38:05,420 --> 00:38:07,670
Joey: Oh, there we go.
Um...

897
00:38:07,670 --> 00:38:09,880
♪ This is how it goes ♪
Is that Joey?

898
00:38:09,880 --> 00:38:12,210
Is he wearing my clothes?

899
00:38:12,210 --> 00:38:14,620
♪ This is how it goes ♪

900
00:38:14,620 --> 00:38:17,880
Uh, so we should talk.

901
00:38:17,880 --> 00:38:19,880
♪ This is how ♪

902
00:38:19,880 --> 00:38:22,170
♪ This is how ♪

903
00:38:22,170 --> 00:38:25,040
♪ This is how it goes ♪
But as beautiful as it is,
the snow starts to melt.

904
00:38:26,250 --> 00:38:28,420
♪ I'm ready ♪

905
00:38:28,420 --> 00:38:32,830
♪ And I don't want
to fight anymore ♪

906
00:38:32,830 --> 00:38:34,620
♪ This is how it goes ♪

907
00:38:36,040 --> 00:38:39,000
Misery loves company, so...

908
00:38:39,000 --> 00:38:40,580
I brought donuts...

909
00:38:40,580 --> 00:38:43,000
and despair.

910
00:38:52,460 --> 00:38:54,460
Jo?

911
00:38:54,460 --> 00:38:55,830
I...

912
00:38:55,830 --> 00:38:57,380
I thought you were him.

913
00:39:02,620 --> 00:39:04,880
I'm sorry.

914
00:39:04,880 --> 00:39:07,710
He left me.

915
00:39:07,710 --> 00:39:09,080
No, he didn't.

916
00:39:11,710 --> 00:39:13,380
I think he did.

917
00:39:16,500 --> 00:39:20,500
I think he woke up one day

918
00:39:20,500 --> 00:39:25,080
and felt the need to
escape his life and me.

919
00:39:28,830 --> 00:39:30,460
I called his mom.

920
00:39:32,210 --> 00:39:34,960
He wasn't there.

921
00:39:34,960 --> 00:39:36,880
He'd never been there.

922
00:39:40,620 --> 00:39:42,710
He left me.

923
00:39:42,710 --> 00:39:45,250
And now I can't...

924
00:39:45,250 --> 00:39:47,710
I can't...

925
00:39:47,710 --> 00:39:49,670
I can't breathe.

926
00:39:49,670 --> 00:39:52,750
And you're suddenly
standing in dirty slush...
I can't breathe.

927
00:39:52,750 --> 00:39:55,620
...frozen and unable to
feel anything at all.

928
00:40:03,880 --> 00:40:08,120
But after enough time,
even that disappears.

929
00:40:10,960 --> 00:40:12,710
Hey.

930
00:40:12,710 --> 00:40:14,880
Hey.

931
00:40:14,880 --> 00:40:16,170
Where you off to?

932
00:40:16,170 --> 00:40:17,880
Home to hug my boys,

933
00:40:17,880 --> 00:40:20,330
spoil them rotten
just because they're alive.

934
00:40:20,330 --> 00:40:21,380
♪ And it's always on her mind ♪
You?

935
00:40:21,380 --> 00:40:22,670
Same.

936
00:40:22,670 --> 00:40:24,920
Hmm.

937
00:40:24,920 --> 00:40:27,960
♪ She cries at the news
when the shots ring out ♪

938
00:40:27,960 --> 00:40:30,580
Grey.
♪ Every single time ♪

939
00:40:30,580 --> 00:40:34,460
Dr. DeLuca,
who is he to you?

940
00:40:34,460 --> 00:40:36,710
♪ And, no, I cannot fix it ♪

941
00:40:36,710 --> 00:40:39,080
♪ No, I cannot make it stop ♪

942
00:40:39,080 --> 00:40:41,830
♪ So I said,
"Turn your phone off" ♪

943
00:40:41,830 --> 00:40:45,580
He's one of my firsts.
♪ "Only look me in my eyes" ♪

944
00:40:45,580 --> 00:40:47,830
He's the first man
that I said

945
00:40:47,830 --> 00:40:50,290
"I love you" to
after my husband.
♪ "Can we live that real life,
real life?"

946
00:40:50,290 --> 00:40:53,790
♪ Oh, hey, "Turn your phone off,
only look me in the eyes" ♪
Hmm.

947
00:40:53,790 --> 00:40:56,460
Was it good?

948
00:40:56,460 --> 00:40:59,750
♪ "Can we live, yeah,
real life, real life?"
To say I love you
to someone new?

949
00:41:04,620 --> 00:41:05,710
Yeah, I --

950
00:41:05,710 --> 00:41:08,670
It was.

951
00:41:08,670 --> 00:41:10,880
It was good.

952
00:41:10,880 --> 00:41:13,120
It was really good.

953
00:41:13,120 --> 00:41:14,880
I've been, um...

954
00:41:18,830 --> 00:41:21,250
♪ I wish I had the answers ♪

955
00:41:21,250 --> 00:41:23,670
It's been lonely.

956
00:41:23,670 --> 00:41:25,540
You know?

957
00:41:25,540 --> 00:41:27,750
I've never met
anyone like me.
♪ Something you
could hold to ♪

958
00:41:27,750 --> 00:41:30,380
Widowed so young.

959
00:41:30,380 --> 00:41:31,670
It's nice.

960
00:41:31,670 --> 00:41:33,420
♪ Only thing that's real
to me is you ♪

961
00:41:33,420 --> 00:41:36,500
It helps.

962
00:41:36,500 --> 00:41:38,000
To have a friend.

963
00:41:40,540 --> 00:41:42,040
It helps me, too.

964
00:41:42,040 --> 00:41:44,750
The ground thaws,
the days get longer,

965
00:41:44,750 --> 00:41:46,710
and though you could
never imagine it,

966
00:41:46,710 --> 00:41:48,620
you start to feel again.

967
00:41:48,620 --> 00:41:51,210
Good night, Hayes.
♪ "Turn your phone off ♪

968
00:41:51,210 --> 00:41:53,880
♪ Only look me in my eyes ♪

969
00:41:53,880 --> 00:41:57,710
♪ Can we live that real life,
real life?" ♪

970
00:41:57,710 --> 00:42:01,040
She talked about having
a "twisted sister."
♪ Oh, hey,
"Turn your phone off" ♪

971
00:42:01,040 --> 00:42:03,420
Yang did.
♪ "Only look me in my eyes" ♪

972
00:42:03,420 --> 00:42:05,170
I'm guessing that's you?

973
00:42:05,170 --> 00:42:07,750
♪ "Can we live that real life,
real life?"

974
00:42:07,750 --> 00:42:08,790
♪ Oh, hey ♪

975
00:42:15,120 --> 00:42:17,670
♪ Real life, real life ♪
It surprises me every time.

976
00:42:17,670 --> 00:42:18,920
♪ Oh, hey ♪