Meredith: If given the option, we prep our surgeries for days.
We study. We practice.
We run through it over and over again in our minds.
[ Door opens ] Jo, it's past 7:00 already.
♪ I can't expect you to be honest ♪
Yeah, I'm still sick.
You haven't gone to work all week.
Yeah, because I'm sick.
Maybe you should see a doctor.
No, it's just a bug.
Well, you don't have a fever.
-Stop. -You're not throwing up.
Jo, please talk to me.
Tell me what's going on.
My entire body aches, Alex, okay?
It's just a bug. Go to work so I can sleep.
♪ Underneath a crimson ocean of sky ♪
Taking on a patient's case is not unlike marriage.
♪ Know I'll always want you by my side ♪
We get to know you.
Inside and out.
♪♪
♪ When we drive ♪
When did you get the call?
Earlier this morning -- donor's in Olympia.
And everything checks out? Yeah, it's a perfect match.
Have you told her yet?
Well, I didn't want you to miss the fun.
You trust us with your lives.
And we promise to protect and care for you.
So...how did it go?
Oh, we just finished.
Any pain or nausea? Dizziness?
I feel annoyed. [ Cup thumps lightly ]
Too many people have nothing to do
except fret over a five-minute radiation zap.
A potato wouldn't have cooked in the time that I was in there.
[ Chuckles ] [ Sighs ]
-Mm. -Mm.
What?
♪♪
Well, we have something for you.
A gift.
I don't see anything.
It is a patient that we brought in from L.A.
for an abdominal wall transplant.
A gift implies jewelry.
We are also going to transplant his penis and scrotum.
♪♪
Or you are...
♪ When we drive ♪
If you're ready to come back.
In sickness and health.
♪ When we drive ♪
[ Breathes sharply ]
I guess I need to change into some scrubs.
[ Both laugh ]
My baby brought me a penis!
-Yes! -Ooh!
-Yes, yes, he did. -Hello!
For better or worse. Ooh! Yes!
Woman on P.A.: Dr. Nelson to Pediatrics.
Dr. Lisa Nelson to Pediatrics. [ Elevator bell dings ]
[ Indistinct conversations ]
[ Leo crying ]
Hi, Leo! [ Leo coos ]
How you doing? You good?
No, you're not, are you, buddy?
[ Doors slide shut ] You, uh, got two molars coming in,
so you've been a terror at night.
Well, teething is a natural biological process.
Don't let anyone blame you for that.
You tell Amelia that's not what I said.
You tell Owen he doesn't have to
communicate with me through a baby. [ Elevator bell dings, doors slide open ]
[ Leo fussing ]
The house had bay windows
and original hardwood floors and -- And ghosts.
Definitely ghosts near that creepy fireplace.
Oh, fun! Reunion!
Hey, so, you're looking at houses, huh?
And I'm gonna go see a consult in the pit.
[ Telephone ringing in distance ]
Um -- I'm looking at houses.
Yeah, I went along
because I can tell you about a house's foundation
by walking across the floor barefoot.
It's one of my superpowers. Mm.
I just -- I don't want to raise a baby
in a -- in a hotel room.
You know you can always stay with me.
I have plenty of room.
And [clicks tongue] baby supplies, you know.
I -- No, I-I'll -- I'll figure it out, thanks.
Okay. Well, if you need, we're here.
-Okay. -Bye.
[ Gasps ] You know, I bet Owen's house
doesn't have that cute little breakfast nook.
[ Elevator bell dings ]
You just said it was haunted.
Yeah, well -- [ Telephone rings in distance ]
Uh. [ Sighs ]
Woman on P.A.: Dr. Yannick to the ER.
You needed me? Yes.
Where did you put the compliance reports
for the Medical Boar--
You got an interview I need to know about? No.
No, I just got used to wearing suits,
so I like them now.
Uh-huh. So, where are the reports?
Please tell me you filled them out.
Karev, they're due tomorrow!
What reports are those? [ Sighs ]
Chief Bailey?
Sorry to interrupt, but the students are here.
Hey, hey, you in a suit sends a mixed message!
What s-s-students?
They're high schoolers enrolled in a STEM program
to learn about leadership.
You agreed to it last -- Uh, no, I have to focus,
not have ambitious teenagers staring at me
because they don't know how to have a conversation.
So, I'm delegating -- you take them, and --
Hello. Welcome.
I am [sighs] your... chief.
♪♪
Hey. Hey.
Um, hey, have you worked with Webber since the...?
The party? Mm-hmm.
No. You know, I've actually managed to avoid it.
[ Sighs ] He gave me a lap appy.
What do you mean he gave you a lap appy?
He said, "DeLuca, today's your lucky day.
I've got a lap appy, and I'm giving it to you."
Wow. Huh?
You think it's strange, too?
I think it's a test you ought not fail.
[ Sighs ] What kind of test?
Like a surgical test,
or like a "You're dating Meredith Grey
and I don't know if I approve" test?
Who cares? It's an appy. You got it.
I got to go get a penis.
[ Elevator bell dings ] Okay. Wait. What?
A penis?
DeLuca, we got OR 2.
Okay. Thank you, sir.
I-I really appreciate this.
I'm -- I'm looking forward to it.
I should hope so.
All right.
Woman on P.A.: Dr. York to Oncology.
-[ Clears throat ] -Dr. Riley York to Oncology.
[ Telephone rings in distance ]
Gus Carter, 10 years old,
day 16 of cough and recurrent sinus infection.
He's been listless, tired --
Really pale. And just...not himself.
Every Saturday, we get bagels
and eat them outside the Smith Tower.
It's Gus's thing.
He loves the history, knows every single thing about it.
We haven't been in three weeks.
We'll figure out what's going on.
You do a chest X-ray? A strep swab?
I haven't been able to do an exam.
Gus is autistic.
He struggles with being physically touched.
Is he in any pain?
I mean, it's hard to tell.
He -- He just doesn't communicate like other kids do.
Well, there are things we can try that may help. May I?
Uh, please.
Hey, Gus, I'm Alex.
I like your book.
You think buildings are pretty cool, huh?
The exterior of the Smith Tower has only been washed once.
In 1976.
Really? That's neat.
You know, if you look out that window over there,
you just might see the Space Needle.
Wanna try?
[ Penlight clicks ] And while you look over there,
I'm just gonna take a look in your eyes real quick --
-[ Gasps ] -Gus.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
-It's okay. It's okay, Gus. -It's all right.
Should I get the O2?
[ Breathing deeply ]
Slowly breathe in.
How are we supposed to help him?
We get creative.
Breathe out. Breathe in.
-All right. -[ Breathing deeply ]
Just breathe.
Man: Hey, let's go!
Hello? Oh! Megan!
-[ Laughing ] Hi, Meredith! -Hi!
How are you? I'm good!
You look fantastic! Are you well?
How are you feeling? What's happening?
Is there -- Oh, I'm sorry.
-Did you want to look at it? -Yes!
[ Laughs ]
There you go. Wow.
I know. Hey!
This stomach won the Catherine Fox Award, people.
You should all be looking at it, too.
That looks really good.
Yeah. Well, you did it.
So, now, tell me -- there's no pain, no tenderness, no...?
Nothing. And by the way, lifting up my shirt
was how I convinced my patient to get the same surgery,
so, you know, don't mess up.
Fantastic.
I'm on my way to do the procurement now.
Mm-hmm. And just for the record,
I did not tell Teddy and Owen that you were coming,
in case you want to surprise them.
Teddy?
Teddy's here?
Yes, Teddy is here. [ Laughs ]
[ Laughing ] Oh, my God.
Oh. Bed 3's ready to go up to CT...
Yep. Oh.
-Oh, no. -What?
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!
What?
-[ Sighs ] -What is wrong with you?!
Hey, Megan, before you get started,
I just want to --
Why didn't you tell me that you two
had finally gotten together?!
[ Gasps ]
[ Laughing ] And we're having a baby?!
Oh, my God, come on!
I am so happy!
Oh, my God! Oh!
Um, Megan... [ Clears throat ]
Um... [ Laughs ]
-Megan. -Oh, God.
[ Laughs ]
-Um. -What?
[ Sighs ]
[ Clicks tongue ]
[ Clears throat ]
[ Indistinct conversations in distance ]
Megan? Just making sure you're okay...
Uh...
She's okay. She's -- She's processing.
Right? You're processing?
I mean, it's a lot to process.
Yeah. [ Sniffles ]
Yeah. It's a lot.
It's just so much stupidity
that my brain is struggling to take it all in.
Okay, Megan, come on -- I mean...
so much stupidity.
[ Scoffs ]
You went to Germany for one night,
knocked her up,
and then screwed it up so badly
that you gave her your job instead of a ring?!
You dum-dum!
Oh, are you calling me dum-dum? Are we 6?
No, Owen, we are stone-cold adults.
But what you did here is so stupid
that the word "idiot" felt too sophisticated,
so, yes, I'm sticking with "dum-dum"!
[ Sighs ] Do you...
Well, I-I kind of want to defend you,
but it never goes well when I get in between you and Megan. Oh.
She's lying. That's a lie.
She doesn't want to defend you, Owen.
She wants to call you something way worse than "dum-dum."
For the record?
This is exactly why I didn't tell you.
No. It was your own deep-seated shame.
Ugh, so you're a shrink now? [ Door opens ]
-Altman. -Mnh.
247 Lawndale.
I'll check it out. Great, thanks.
No, no, you got to see it, and soon. It's, uh, perfect.
Is, uh, this your Realtor?
Um. No. Um... [ Chuckles ]
This is my -- This is my boyfriend. Ah.
Um... Ah. [ Laughs ]
Uh, Megan, Tom. Tom, Megan.
Megan Hunt.
[ Laughs ]
Dum-dum. Sorry?
Not you.
♪♪
[ Smacks lips ]
And then, I isolate the pudendal nerve, and you...
Hello?
Yeah. The, um, trickiest part of an appy
is if it's retrocecal, right?
Why?
Because Andrew is doing an appy today
with Richard. DeLuca?
Yeah. He'll be fine.
DeLuca's passed appys.
Now, can you pay attention to this, please?
Sure. I -- I won an award for this.
And I didn't because I was nice enough
to take my name off of it.
-Remember? -Mm.
This is a whole different ba--
What? Were you just about to say "ball game"?
I was gonna say it's important that we don't mess this up.
Okay. All right? That we get it right.
It's my mom's first surgery back.
Yeah, I was gonna say "ball game."
[ Laughs ]
[ Telephone rings in distance ]
Oh, you're pretty good at that.
It takes 41 seconds to ride the elevator
to the top of the Space Needle.
-Yeah. -On a non-windy day.
Really? That seems fast.
It is.
[ Gloves stretching ]
Gus, do you ever get a pain in your chest?
Like, when you take a walk,
does it hurt a little to breathe?
Does it hurt a lot? Or a little?
Does it hurt... this much?
Or more?
[ Blocks tap lightly ]
♪♪
That much?
Let's get a chest CT.
♪♪
[ Blocks tap lightly ]
You got through to him.
Yeah, let me know when the scans are up.
Woman on P.A.: Dr. Brody, call Radiology.
Dr. Jeannette Brody, call Radiology.
Hey. Have you talked to Jo
since she got back from visiting her birth mom?
Jo found her birth mom? Whoa.
What happened? I-I don't know.
But it wasn't good. She won't talk to me.
She won't return Meredith's calls or Bailey's.
[ Sighs ] She won't come to work.
But she trusts you. Maybe you can talk to her?
Be like her -- her Legos, or -- Huh?
Just maybe you can reach her, or -- or distract her.
I-I don't know what.
Can you try? Please? Yeah.
Uh, I'll move some stuff around.
Thanks. [ Sighs ]
[ Indistinct conversations ]
Oh! You're in here.
Hey, can you -- I'm sorry. I need your room.
I just had a stupid elevator ride with Owen,
which was...pain.
It was painful.
Which you would think it wouldn't be.
I mean, I'm having great sex.
I'm having aerobic sex!
I mean, I'm waking up with endorphins --
[ Clears throat loudly ]
Dr. Shepherd, meet the students
from the STEM leadership program.
Dr. Shepherd is our chief of neurosurgery.
Who can define "endorphins"?
♪♪
[ Monitor beeping ]
[ Gasps ]
Okay. Uh.
Alicia Davis, 24, admitted with severe abdominal pain... Mm-hmm.
...which then localized in the right-lower quadrant.
Inability to keep food down --
Which was weird,
because I'm pretty ruthless about what I put into my body.
You are, too, I bet, look at you.
[ Chuckles ]
Uh.
[ Clears throat ]
Right, um, which made sense, then,
when the CT showed an inflamed appendix --
Do you CrossFit, bro?
I'm a CrossFit fiend.
Uh, no. Sadly, no time.
I could train you. Or with you.
I'm the real deal.
[ Breathes sharply ] I have almost a million followers
on Instagram.
See? That's okay.
-Just look! -Really, I'm good.
I just want to get you prepped for surgery.
Uh, patient care includes
putting the patient at ease, Dr. DeLuca.
Right.
Let's have a look.
♪♪
I'm hot, right?
I'm saying, don't leave a scar.
Uh-huh.
♪♪
[ Pats back ]
♪♪
Caleb Hicks, 29,
here for an abdominal wall,
penis and scrotum transplant.
He sustained major injuries
to his lower extremities and pelvic area
during an IED blast in Afghanistan
about a year ago.
Are you her?
Are you Catherine Fox?
Indeed.
It's a pleasure to meet you, Caleb.
You're a legend to the online support groups,
like the Neil Armstrong of Johnsons.
[ Laughs ] I'll take that. I'll take...
Well, I just want to make sure that you're completely clear
about the extent of this surgery.
Not only is it a massive piece of tissue
from another man's body,
but the recovery is --
It's rough. I know.
Dr. Hunt explained it to me in L.A., and I can do it.
I'm ready. Okay.
And my mom came in from Reno to help out.
I'll be here until Anna gets back.
-[ Chuckles ] -Anna's my fiancée.
She's on an Air Force mission for 10 days,
and then she's on nursing duty. Okay.
Then we will come back and prep you
as soon as Dr. Avery and Dr. Grey
are on their way with the organ,
and -- and then both Dr. Hunts
will be assisting me in the OR.
Both? Oh, yes, this is a very complex procedure.
We're gonna need an additional set of hands,
so I thought Caleb would be most comfortable
with another veteran.
-Oh. -It's nice to meet you.
-Okay. -Hello.
[ Sighs ]
[ Siren wailing in distance ]
[ Knocking on door ]
Link: I know you're in there!
So...
I'll just keep knocking.
[ Pounding on door ]
[ Bed creaks ]
[ Door creaks ]
Chicken soup?
Heard you were sick.
I'm not hungry.
This Chinese joint on Weller --
they sell out most days because it is so good.
You shouldn't be in here. I'm -- I'm contagious.
I'm throwing up sick.
Do you want it in a bowl, or just out of the container?
I don't want any -- [ Sighs ]
Brought some for myself, too.
[ Sniffs ] Mmm. Soup.
[ Container taps lightly ]
Whatever.
♪♪
[ Silverware clattering ]
[ Sighs ]
♪♪
Okay. Once we have positioned the donor tissue,
we'll start by connecting the urethra.
What's next?
Corpus cavernosum? Exactly.
So, do we know which vessels we're getting from the donor?
Schmitt, vessels -- that's the next thing we'll anastomose.
Name them. Megan, I'm just trying to get up to speed here, so --
Go, Schmitt.
Dorsal, deep dorsal, superficial dorsal,
superficial pudendal, femoral --
Greater saphenous and deep epigastric.
Listen, I am sorry
I didn't tell you everything, but it's complicated --
Now let's talk about the nerves.
And it's my life,
and I get to decide when I share important details --
Should I leave?
No. Please.
Listen, before we go in this OR,
I want to make sure that we're okay.
Do you know how long I've been working with Caleb?
10 months.
And now we are finally here, and he is ready,
and I don't have time to deal with
your constant need to make everything okay.
What I do need right now is to make sure
that you understand the steps of this procedure.
Do you? Yes.
Okay, nerves.
We want to do the nerve coaptation
as far distally as we can.
Woman on P.A.: Dr. Thatcher -- Dr. Kirsten Thatcher, 6411.
[ Birds chirping ]
[ Water lapping ]
[ Liquid suctioning, monitor beeping ]
You're good on your plane dissection?
Yes. Time, please? We barely started.
I'm thinking about the appy. They're quick.
They should be finished by now, don't you think?
Richard's with him. He'll be fine.
Right, well, that's the problem.
At your party, Andrew and I were having a moment,
and Richard kind of walked --
Oh. He caught you. [ Beeping continues ]
Yes.
Well, he caught me and Maggie once, too.
I felt like I was 14.
What is that about?
Don't worry about that. Worry about the appy patient.
If you're feeling this nervous, imagine how DeLuca feels.
It's just an appy.
So simple. Yet so easy to overthink.
I hate you.
[ Sizzles ]
[ Telephone rings in distance ]
Have you seen a picture of it?
Yes. You'll be happy.
Happy how?
What's it look like?
It looks...healthy. Come on.
Could you at least tell him the donor's shoe size?
[ Laughter ] Geez.
Caleb, look who's here.
Oh, my God. What happened to you?
Sue: Anna! You made it!
Get out.
Caleb, your mom called me --
I don't want her here. She needs to leave!
Get her out now!
Hey. Hey, hey, hey. Whoa.
♪♪
[ Scoffs ]
That's a large mass on the thymus gland. How old?
Uh, 10.
In kids, thymomas are always malignant,
but, luckily, resecting them can be completely curative.
I can scrub in.
Hey, Jo's been out all week. Is everything okay?
I'll book the OR.
[ Telephone rings in distance ]
♪♪
Gus is severely anemic --
we can't operate until we transfuse him.
♪♪
[ Horns honk ]
I know what you're doing.
Just laundry. Not that big a mystery.
You're checking on me. I don't need it.
I just need to go to sleep.
Do you have a basket or something?
Please leave.
Do you remember Bronwyn Murphy?
Your redheaded bartender girlfriend
with the "Texas" tattoo?
[ Grunts ]
Remember when she dumped me?
Vaguely. Vaguely?
I drank for three days.
I-I missed so much work, I almost got fired.
So what's your point?
I was a shell.
I couldn't move.
But I had this friend who came over to my place,
even though all I wanted in the world
was to be left alone.
In fact, I told her that. Several times.
But...she stayed.
And she did my laundry.
So this is revenge?
It's just a friend doing another friend's laundry.
Link: Oh, I'd give the soup another minute to cool.
I'm pretty sure they boil it before they --
[ Bottle clinks ]
Don't mind if I do.
I wasn't offering.
I'll take one, anyway.
[ Sighs ]
[ Liquid pouring ]
-Why would you call her? -She said you needed me.
Right! So I dropped everything, and I came --
despite being dumped nine months ago
with no explanation.
What do you mean, dumped?
You told me she was gonna take care of you after surgery,
when she got back from --
Where were you assigned? No, I'm not on assignment.
I came from San Diego.
What surgery? Lord.
Are you getting a procedure for a prosthetic leg
or something...?
-It's none of her business. -[ Sighs ]
She's supposed to be your support system --
you listed her in your evaluation.
You knew that having a support system
was essential for you being able to get this surgery.
You knew that. What surgery?!
Can we please just get everyone out of here
and then do my surgery?
Okay? And then I'll leave everyone alone.
♪♪
[ Sighs ]
Caleb's been prepping for months.
-You can't just say no. -The hell I can't.
Catherine, just wait a minute.
We got it -- everything's intact.
Why isn't everyone in the OR?
The surgery is off!
I'm not giving that man a penis today.
[ Elevator bell dings ]
Any questions about the urology floor?
[ Telephone rings in distance ]
I'm creating a window at the base of the mesoappendix now.
You're good to get it? Or... Yes. Absolutely.
What's your plan here? [ Monitors beeping ]
Excuse me?
Where do you see this going? Long-term?
[ Beeping continues ]
[ Chuckles ] Sir, I...
We've not really had those discussions yet.
[ Sighs ] Uh, I mean, she's got a family.
That informs where she's coming from...
and I certainly want to respect that.
But, uh, for me? [ Beeping continues ]
[ Sighs ] She's amazing, sir.
She makes me so happy.
You know, I'm -- I'm -- She --
I'm gonna stop you right now
because my question was... [ Sighs ]
...where do you see your surgical career going,
long-term?
And whether you've thought about a specialty.
[ Coughing ] Um.
Oh, right. Uh...shoot.
Well, uh, g-general surgery... is attractive.
What a surprise. [ Sighs ]
All right, do you see that, sir?
Is that a dead bowel? It is.
The terminal ileum's been compromised.
What do you want to do?
I think we need to convert to an open procedure.
What do you think? I think you're right.
All right, let's pull the trocars.
♪♪
Ma, it's gonna be a grueling surgery, all right?
You haven't been in the OR in a while now.
The patient is not mentally or emotionally prepared
for a transplant.
We're taking a piece of another person's body
and putting it onto his.
He needs a support team for that,
just like I had for my own surgery.
As much as all the constant nagging and worrying
makes me crazy --
if I didn't have you or Richard,
I couldn't have done any of this.
The surgery is off.
[ Sighs ]
And don't you dare accuse me of being scared or tired.
Even though I'm a little bit of both,
but that is not the reason.
[ Indistinct conversations ]
Woman on P.A.: Dr. Lowe to Maternity.
Dr. Kathy Lowe to Maternity.
Uh, I think she's right. I'm sorry.
Keep everything on ice, keep everybody close, okay?
I'm gonna fix this -- I just need to talk to Caleb.
I'll do it.
No, Owen. It's my patient.
I don't need you to swoop in and save the day.
Do you have a penis?
[ Elevator bell dings ]
[ Stammers ]
[ Door creaks ]
I cannot believe this is the one time
this could make a difference.
Fine. Just don't screw it up
like you screwed up the rest of your life.
[ Clears throat ]
[ Telephone rings in distance ]
Okay, now, you have to run the bowel through your --
From the ligament of Treitz all the way down -- I did.
Okay, make sure you feel for -- Wait. Sir, hold on.
Is -- [ Sighs ]
Is this -- Is it a Meckel's band?
It is. What is it? [ Monitor beeping ]
Meckel's diverticulum,
a congenital anomaly of the small intestine.
The band seems to be kinking off the blood supply.
I have to do an ileocecectomy.
No. You don't. I do.
It's my surgery. No, your surgery was an appy.
This was an incidental finding.
Yeah, but it's my incidental finding.
DeLuca -- I staple off the area of necrosis.
Right? You don't even know what stapler to use.
GIA 60 with 3.8-millimeter staples.
[ Beeping continues ]
♪♪
[ Stapler clicks ]
This one, right?
♪♪
In kids, the thymus gland helps regulate
the body's immune responses.
But since he has a tumor there...
His gland isn't working properly,
so it's causing all sorts of symptoms --
uh, his cough, his fatigue, his discomfort.
But this transfusion should help
get his red blood cell count up,
correcting the anemia.
And then you'll do the surgery? Correct.
God, a tumor. And anemia.
I just thought we were gonna take out his tonsils.
[ Alarm beeping ] Dr. Karev!
[ Ragged breathing ]
Give him space, or you'll scare him more.
[ Hyperventilating ] Sweetie, you're all right.
You need to pull the IV. Can you back up, please?
H-He doesn't like to be touched.
It's not a panic attack. It's a reaction to the blood.
Why? Why is he reacting to the blood?
[ Hyperventilating ]
[ Breathing slowing ] Maggie: It's okay, Gus. It's okay.
We've got you. All right, Gus.
Good, good. Take a deep breath.
[ Sighs ]
-What are you doing? -Hey.
Oh, I'm trying to find a place for my baby
that doesn't share walls with strangers
who can hear her wail all night while I fail at new parenting.
And apparently,
it has to be in a good school district.
[ Computer keys clack ]
You're house-hunting.
With another guy, Teddy?
I -- I'm not moving in with Tom.
He's -- He's just -- You know, he's helping --
I watched you suffer from afar for years,
I watched you love him for years,
and then I watched you suffer some more.
I'm sure the neurosurgeon is...lovely,
but my brother is single.
And you love him. And you've always loved him.
And he's an idiot, but he loves you, too.
And now he has Leo and a crib,
and I know for sure that he would want you to move in,
and -- and then -- and... [ Sighs ]
It can be easy, and it can evolve.
Megan, I'm not gonna m-move in to that house.
I-I -- And -- what --
just...slide into Amelia's place in their bed?
I mean, that is not gonna happen.
And, I mean, Megan, if it were you,
you would burn the house down before you moved into it.
I would.
Totally would. [ Laughs ]
I totally would. [ Chuckles ]
I am so happy you're here.
-So, where were you stationed? -Near Kandahar.
-Not a lot of trees. -[ Chuckles ] No.
I, uh, spent most of my time in Fallujah.
When I got back, I would...
still kick my shoes out for sand.
It's a kind of habit, I guess.
Don't have that problem anymore.
[ Chuckles ]
Yeah. [ Sighs ]
I didn't lie to Anna.
When I broke up with her,
I told her I wasn't right in the head.
And I wasn't.
You went through something terrible.
Took one wrong step, and I became a monster.
Nobody thinks that.
I woke up, and a part of me was missing.
And I'm not talking about my leg.
I can live with one leg.
I didn't feel like a man anymore.
I didn't know if I could live like that,
and I didn't want Anna to live like that, either.
Yeah.
You know, I was in an explosion over there, too.
I didn't suffer like you have, but...
I, uh...
I lost my whole platoon.
Damn. Yeah.
[ Breathes sharply ] They sent me home,
and I broke up with my fiancée
with a three-line e-mail.
I mean, she wasn't right for me,
but I'm still ashamed of how I treated her.
Anna's...
She's right for me.
She's everything. She's my...
[ Voice breaking ] She was my everything.
You owe her better than what she got.
♪♪
Give her a chance, Caleb.
You know, talk to her.
Sometimes, when you give people a chance,
they show up in ways you wouldn't believe.
♪♪
Megan: And he just told her the truth?
He did. And she's not going anywhere.
And this is supposed to change my mind?
Him having one conversation?
Catherine, I know this guy.
I've been this guy.
When I came back, I wasn't myself.
I did things that I wasn't proud of --
it took me several months
just to knock on my mom's door
to tell her that I was home.
And I didn't lose a part of my body.
Catherine, I operated on guys over there,
and when they woke up,
the first question they would ask was,
"Is it still there?"
And they weren't talking about their legs or their arms.
Every time Caleb changes his clothes,
goes to the bathroom, looks down...he's triggered.
So I believe this surgery
is what he needs to move forward.
I believe this will help him far more
than it could possibly hurt him.
♪♪
[ Beeping ]
Alex: What do you mean, you don't know?
I mean, I don't know!
I read the crossmatch as AB -- he got AB.
We do not give children the wrong blood
in this hospital, Karev.
We do not give adults the wrong blood in this hospital.
So, someone, please explain to me
what the hell is going on and how this isn't a lawsuit,
so I can lower my voice!
You see this, girls? This is leadership.
We're running a second crossmatch
to check his blood type again.
His chart says AB.
It's gotta be something else, right?
[ Beeps ] Second crossmatch is up.
He's definitely AB.
Positive or negative? Neither.
-What? -Huh?
He's Rh-Null.
What is that?
-That's golden blood. -[ Breathes sharply ]
It's a rare blood type that lacks all Rh antigens.
No positive, no negative. I've never seen this.
How rare is rare?
Pretty rare, 'cause I've never heard of it.
Less than 50 people have been documented to have it.
♪♪
Close with 2-0 PDS? Good call.
All right, clamps.
Look, I'm -- I'm sorry.
I overstepped. I was --
Terse. A little more terse than necessary.
I'm sorry. I just --
I-I could see the whole procedure in my head.
You know, you gave me the case --
I wanted to do the case from start to finish.
I wanted to show you that I was worthy of...
Malleable?
[ Monitor beeping ]
Worthy of what?
A career in general surgery.
Well, Dr. Grey's head of that department.
It's not up to me. Of course.
I could put in a good word.
Or are you set there?
[ Beeping continues ]
That would be great, sir. Thank you.
You got this?
Yes, sir.
[ Beeping continues ]
[ Tools clatter lightly ]
[ Meredith sighs ]
So, how did you convince your mother to do the surgery?
Oh, I didn't. That was all Hunt. [ Sighs ]
Basically, I just accused her
of being scared to come back.
[ Laughs ] I bet she loved that.
[ Chuckles ] Yep.
Heparinized saline in here, please. Uh-huh.
There we go.
You know, ever since she got sick,
I'm scared all the time.
Even if things are fine.
Well, I was scared for Richard.
Uh, I did not want him to lose another person.
You know, the weird thing is, when I first found out,
my initial thought was, "Okay, my mom is gonna die.
It's just gonna be me and Richard and..."
Then I remembered I actually have a father.
Whole time, did not occur to me once that I had a father.
Same thing happened to me with Thatcher.
I was sitting with him, and I thought,
"Oh, I actually have a father.
And he's dying, but...I have a father,
and it's not Richard Webber."
[ Breathes sharply ]
Well, I think we are prepped and ready to re-scrub.
All right. It's all yours.
What? Where are you going?
I have to go spend some time in my lab --
You know, work on my next groundbreaking thing.
I'm taking my name off. We're even.
You just don't want to do an extremely long surgery
you already won an award for.
You don't need to go to the moon twice.
[ Sighs ]
[ "The Fire" by Bishop Briggs plays ]
[ Monitor beeping ]
[ Vocalizing ]
♪♪
♪ Gave me love ♪
♪ Sweet love ♪
♪ Gave me love ♪
♪ Sweet love ♪
♪ Heaven above ♪
♪ Sent me love ♪
♪ But it wasn't enough ♪
♪ No, it wasn't enough ♪
♪ 'Cause I've been a devil ♪
♪ I've been a saint ♪
♪ Somebody help me ♪
♪ I can't change ♪
♪ I keep on ♪
♪ Runnin' toward, runnin' toward the fire ♪
♪ I keep on ♪
♪ Runnin' toward, runnin' toward the fire ♪
♪ The fire ♪
♪ Oh, I let my lover go ♪
♪ Didn't wanna be a liar ♪
♪ Ashes in the cold ♪
♪ Now I'm running toward the fire ♪
♪ Runnin' toward, runnin' toward the fire ♪
Catherine: Thank you, doctors.
Dr. Avery and I have this from here.
♪ I keep on ♪
♪ Runnin' toward, runnin' toward the fire ♪
♪ The fire ♪
♪ Gave me love, gave me sick, sick love ♪
♪ But it was me who got swallowed up ♪
All right. Ready to assess profusion?
♪ Not enough, dust to dust ♪ Please.
♪ Pray for us ♪
I promise, if things get worse, I will tell you.
I promise I will not keep any more secrets from you.
♪♪
Thank you.
♪♪
[ Vocalizing ]
Oh, we got a good blood flow.
Aww. Thank you, baby. This was a beautiful gift.
[ Vocalizing continues ]
[ Music ends ]
[ Laughing ] It's true.
Well...
She didn't even have a tattoo of Texas.
It was just the word "Texas."
[ Laughs ] She --
She had a picture of it further down her back.
[ Laughs ] Classy.
[ Both laugh ]
Okay, all right, Bronwyn wasn't perfect, but I was --
Bronwyn. [ Laughs ]
I was in love with her, and it still hurt.
Aww. [ Laughs ]
It -- It -- It hurt when she dumped me.
She was doing you a favor.
Ah, didn't feel like it. [ Sighs ]
Okay, it's time you knew.
She wasn't even from Texas. [ Laughs ]
She was from Delaware, I think.
[ Laughs ]
I've done that favor a lot.
Huh?
Do you remember when I started at the restaurant?
I had just walked out on another job in Kingston.
I was dating this waiter there. Logan.
I really liked him.
I mean, he was kind of a stoner,
but he was cute and polite
and a good kisser.
Dated for months.
And then, one day, we were making out after work,
and he said, "I love you."
And I felt...
I felt the opposite
of how that should make you feel.
I felt...
like he was wrong.
Like no one should ever feel that way about me.
I couldn't even look at him.
I just left.
I didn't call him. I didn't call work.
I just moved to a different part of town and started a new job,
like none of it had ever happened.
I did the same thing to a guy in high school.
And then there was Paul.
Now, you left Paul to save your life.
It's in my wiring.
My mother was a runner.
She still is, apparently.
She can't even sit in the same room as me,
[Voice breaks] even though she says she loves me.
And my father...
♪♪
I always run. It's what I do.
♪♪
[ Bottle thumps ]
♪♪
[ Clattering ]
I think you've maybe had enough.
I don't really care what you think.
♪♪
[ Indistinct conversations ]
Oh, uh... [ Breathes sharply ]
Yes. Uh...
You came here seeking a teacher.
You came here looking for...Yoda.
And I was not your Yoda today.
I can be.
In -- In fact, I'm an excellent Yoda,
but not today.
Uh, I will look into rescheduling.
Uh.
Are you kidding?
About which part?
We learned so much.
Leadership skills, communication.
You told an intern to "move his sorry damn ass
before you move it for him
in a way that he would not appreciate..."
You have a secret innovative medicine lab
and a blue light room and...
And you're always on the move, rolling with the punches,
solving problems...
And the women! It's all women!
Better than Yoda, you were.
Levi: Chief Bailey?
I hear you're looking for the compliance reports?
You're ruining a moment, Schmitt.
Dr. Karev has me do them every month.
I'm sorry? Yeah.
And Helm does the agency and overtime costs,
Parker does the quality and employee metrics,
and Qadri does the vendor contracts...
♪♪
[ Telephone ringing in distance ]
Hey! Your appy turned into a four-hour ileocecectomy?
[ Sighs ] DeLuca's ileocecectomy.
Really? How'd he do?
Oh, it was -- was fine.
He got a little snippy with me, though.
Snippy?
Oh, he had a plan,
and he -- he wanted to see it through, and...
he was right. [ Scoffs ]
Huh.
He's a surgeon, Meredith.
And a good one.
He's a good man.
♪♪
What does that mean, "rare blood"?
Does that matter?
Don't you have all kinds of blood in a bank?
Uh, or O-Negative?
Isn't that the universal donor?
Gus can only receive blood of the exact same type he has.
And until we find enough donors, we can't operate.
How long will that take?
So far, we've found four potential donors.
In...Washington?
In the world.
Oh, my God.
[ Breathes deeply ] So he's just gonna get sicker?
Well, we're going to do everything we can
to correct his anemia
without transfusing him --
We'll find the blood.
Dr. Karev --
We're not gonna stop until we find it.
He didn't want to tell us what was wrong, but he did,
and now we're not gonna give up until we fix him, okay?
[ Breathes shakily ] Thank you.
♪♪
[ Cellphone chimes ]
♪♪
Is that after expenses? Yep.
And did you see the way they separated the departments
with the columns?
With the headings?
Oh. That's very nice.
He had the interns do all of this?
Mm-hmm.
It's ingenious.
Right?
Karev did something better than us.
And he can never know.
♪♪
[ Monitor beeping ]
♪♪
[ Beeping continues ]
Hey.
Megan: You saved the case.
You're welcome. I wasn't saying thank you.
So, just more name-calling, then?
Owen. I love you.
I call you names because someone has to.
Someone has to tell you the truth.
Oh, the truth that I'm an idiot?
That you need help. [ Sighs ]
That you need to do for yourself what you just did for Caleb. [ Scoffs ]
You need to find a -- a way to heal enough
to believe that you are worthy
of joy and happiness and ease in this life.
Because you are. But somehow --
I'm thinking because of trauma --
I'm thinking because of war
and pain and ugliness and PTSD --
somehow, you've come to believe
that you aren't deserving of those things,
so you keep making the hardest possible choices! [ Scoffs ]
Y'know, Megan, I'm sorry we can't all be perfect.
We can't all be you and Riggs.
Owen. Shut up. Seriously.
I see a talk therapist once a week,
I see a somatic PTSD specialist once a week. [ Sighs ]
Riggs and I see a couples therapist one a week
because I want to be as happy as I can for the life I have left.
Don't you?
I've done therapy, Megan. Not enough!
Since when are you an authority --
You went to Germany, and you told Teddy that you loved her,
and then revealed that, 24 hours previously,
you had been in bed with your ex-wife,
so she kicked you out.
How do you not go and get a hotel room
and try again the next day and the next day and the next?
How do you go back to the States
and get back in bed with your ex-wife
and have a foster baby and a teenage addict?!
Owen, you're not well.
Do the work to fix it.
In sickness and in health, they say.
Okay?
That sounds so final, so binding.
♪ I see it in your face ♪
But it just means you have to be there.
♪ Something you can't say ♪
♪ But God only knows ♪ You have to really want to be there.
♪ God only knows ♪ For whatever's coming.
You definitely should...
[ Jo laughing ] ♪ Misery's repeating ♪
And we don't know.
[ Laughs ] ♪ The emptiness is breathing ♪
It could all pan out the way we want...
[ Laughs ] ♪ Love can be misleading ♪
...the way it's supposed to be.
♪ Love can be misleading ♪
Hey. Hey.
We need more ice. [ Laughs ]
♪ Misery's repeating ♪
[ Laughs ] ♪ The emptiness is breathing ♪
You scared the crap out of me with that text.
♪ Love can be misleading ♪ I'm sorry about that.
Well...[ Sighs ] She looks fine now.
[ Laughs ] ♪ But your love is what I'm needing ♪
She's not.
I've seen her in rough shape before, but never like this.
I want to help. I don't know how.
♪ God only knows ♪
Or it could be so much worse.
♪ God only knows ♪ [ Laughs ]
♪♪