1 00:00:01,967 --> 00:00:04,383 Previously on "Grey's Anatomy"... 2 00:00:04,383 --> 00:00:05,591 What if it wasn't - ridiculous? - What? 3 00:00:05,591 --> 00:00:07,938 What if you try to cure Alzheimer's? 4 00:00:07,938 --> 00:00:09,906 Should I anticipate any - goodbye e-mails from you? - I don't know. 5 00:00:09,906 --> 00:00:11,218 Tessa's like Seattle royalty. 6 00:00:11,218 --> 00:00:12,667 Man, I grew up on her stories. 7 00:00:12,667 --> 00:00:14,048 Tessa: I do have another story to tell. 8 00:00:14,048 --> 00:00:16,223 "Tessa and the Rising Sun." 9 00:00:17,534 --> 00:00:18,811 I'm sorry. I can't. 10 00:00:19,709 --> 00:00:21,193 Nick: You don't consider me part of your life. 11 00:00:21,193 --> 00:00:23,057 Of course you're part of my life. 12 00:00:23,057 --> 00:00:24,127 You took the Boston job without even talking to me. 13 00:00:24,127 --> 00:00:26,060 I love cardio. But I love you more. 14 00:00:26,060 --> 00:00:27,751 Guess I'm not sure that I respect that. 15 00:00:27,751 --> 00:00:29,167 [ Thunder crashes, glass shatters ] 16 00:00:29,167 --> 00:00:30,271 [ Child screaming ] 17 00:00:33,447 --> 00:00:40,419 ♪ I'm up, I'm here, I'm out the door ♪ 18 00:00:40,419 --> 00:00:42,732 Meredith: One of the greatest frustrations surgeons have 19 00:00:42,732 --> 00:00:45,148 are the unrealistic expectations of our patients. 20 00:00:45,148 --> 00:00:46,563 Whoa. 21 00:00:46,563 --> 00:00:47,771 ♪ Don't you wanna go with me 22 00:00:47,771 --> 00:00:50,602 Whoa! Whoa! 23 00:00:50,602 --> 00:00:52,017 No! 24 00:00:52,017 --> 00:00:54,675 No. No, no, no! 25 00:00:54,675 --> 00:00:57,678 Whether they're acutely ill or they've been sick for years... 26 00:00:57,678 --> 00:00:59,059 No, no, no, no, no. 27 00:00:59,059 --> 00:01:00,750 No, no. 28 00:01:00,750 --> 00:01:03,063 Oh, my God. No. 29 00:01:03,063 --> 00:01:04,719 ...by the time they're on the surgical table, 30 00:01:04,719 --> 00:01:06,135 they're hoping for a miracle. 31 00:01:06,135 --> 00:01:07,515 - Thanks for the ride. - Get out. 32 00:01:07,515 --> 00:01:09,897 I'm late. So am I. 33 00:01:09,897 --> 00:01:13,245 But often, surgery is just the beginning of the healing, 34 00:01:13,245 --> 00:01:14,902 rather than an end. 35 00:01:14,902 --> 00:01:16,317 Because for weeks or months post-op, 36 00:01:16,317 --> 00:01:18,319 people have to learn how to live 37 00:01:18,319 --> 00:01:20,252 without the part of their body we've just removed. 38 00:01:20,252 --> 00:01:22,668 - Simone: You're late. - Mika: Not as late as you. 39 00:01:22,668 --> 00:01:26,120 And that's not always easy and it's never painless. 40 00:01:26,120 --> 00:01:28,226 So, surgery is not the happily ever after 41 00:01:28,226 --> 00:01:30,228 our patients hope it will be. 42 00:01:30,228 --> 00:01:32,713 Like everything else in life, it's an evolution. 43 00:01:32,713 --> 00:01:34,059 Now, remember what I said to you. 44 00:01:34,059 --> 00:01:35,198 You're going to take these gifts 45 00:01:35,198 --> 00:01:37,545 and go visit your old daycare teachers. 46 00:01:37,545 --> 00:01:39,892 They're gonna be very excited to see you. 47 00:01:39,892 --> 00:01:41,031 Do you remember where you're going? 48 00:01:41,031 --> 00:01:43,137 - Mom, I'm not a baby. - Same, Mom. 49 00:01:43,137 --> 00:01:45,657 Okay. 50 00:01:45,657 --> 00:01:47,521 Amelia: Hey! Maggie: Look who's here! 51 00:01:47,521 --> 00:01:49,695 Hi. Big last day. 52 00:01:49,695 --> 00:01:51,007 Yeah, we're trying to forget 53 00:01:51,007 --> 00:01:52,077 all that and act like everything 54 00:01:52,077 --> 00:01:53,665 - is super normal. - How are we doing? 55 00:01:53,665 --> 00:01:55,322 Not great. [ Chuckles ] 56 00:01:55,322 --> 00:01:57,117 - How's the new place? - Amelia: It is great. 57 00:01:57,117 --> 00:01:59,464 It is weird to live alone when I don't have Scout, 58 00:01:59,464 --> 00:02:01,742 but I feel very grown up. 59 00:02:01,742 --> 00:02:04,158 Do you have any surgeries - I can watch today? - Zola-- 60 00:02:04,158 --> 00:02:05,987 I might have a very excellent one 61 00:02:05,987 --> 00:02:08,507 with Uncle Winston in O.R. two, if your mom says it's okay. 62 00:02:08,507 --> 00:02:10,544 Mom, please? 63 00:02:10,544 --> 00:02:12,373 Okay, if anyone asks, I don't know where you are. 64 00:02:14,134 --> 00:02:16,998 Link! Hi. Hey. 65 00:02:16,998 --> 00:02:19,518 Do you, uh-- Do you have - a busy schedule today? - Actually, no. 66 00:02:19,518 --> 00:02:21,762 I've carved out my whole day to catch up on charting. 67 00:02:21,762 --> 00:02:24,385 I am buried in--I need you to pick up a cake by noon. 68 00:02:24,385 --> 00:02:27,077 - This bakery's across town. - It's for Meredith. 69 00:02:27,077 --> 00:02:28,527 Does she like faraway cake? 70 00:02:28,527 --> 00:02:30,184 It's her favorite. 71 00:02:30,184 --> 00:02:31,358 It's the triple berry with the buttercream. 72 00:02:31,358 --> 00:02:32,704 I would do it myself, 73 00:02:32,704 --> 00:02:34,050 but the baby that I delivered 74 00:02:34,050 --> 00:02:35,569 two weeks ago with the malformed heart, 75 00:02:35,569 --> 00:02:37,191 he's having heart surgery today, 76 00:02:37,191 --> 00:02:39,400 and his parents are very attached to me, and-- 77 00:02:39,400 --> 00:02:41,816 and-- and you love me, so please help. 78 00:02:41,816 --> 00:02:43,370 That is true. 79 00:02:45,026 --> 00:02:46,614 I do love you. Thank you. 80 00:02:48,685 --> 00:02:50,342 [ Sighs, sniffs ] 81 00:02:50,342 --> 00:02:53,345 You're all rounding with Doctors Ndugu and Pierce. 82 00:02:53,345 --> 00:02:55,382 They are breaking new surgical ground, 83 00:02:55,382 --> 00:02:58,178 and it is a privilege that they have invited-- 84 00:02:58,178 --> 00:02:59,524 Sorry. My car broke down. 85 00:02:59,524 --> 00:03:01,215 Had to get a ride with my sister. 86 00:03:01,215 --> 00:03:02,734 Yeah, my car got towed and it's also my house. 87 00:03:02,734 --> 00:03:04,701 Do you know who else wasn't punctual? 88 00:03:04,701 --> 00:03:06,462 Taryn Helm wasn't punctual, 89 00:03:06,462 --> 00:03:08,291 despite being an excellent surgeon, 90 00:03:08,291 --> 00:03:11,087 and now you can find her throwing her life away 91 00:03:11,087 --> 00:03:12,813 bartending across the street. 92 00:03:12,813 --> 00:03:15,367 There's a surgeon bartending at Joe's? 93 00:03:15,367 --> 00:03:16,713 Why? 94 00:03:16,713 --> 00:03:18,543 Because she burnt out, that's why. 95 00:03:18,543 --> 00:03:22,823 So, hydrate and sleep and lean on your friends, 96 00:03:22,823 --> 00:03:26,033 and take a break and get a good therapist. 97 00:03:26,033 --> 00:03:27,931 And be on time, 98 00:03:27,931 --> 00:03:29,588 unless you want to wind up like Helm, 99 00:03:29,588 --> 00:03:31,107 wasting your talents, 100 00:03:31,107 --> 00:03:33,178 your family's investment, and your futures. 101 00:03:33,178 --> 00:03:34,973 Does she know you're throwing shade behind her back? 102 00:03:36,043 --> 00:03:37,907 [ Scoffs ] 103 00:03:40,254 --> 00:03:41,876 Woman over PA: Dr. Joseph to L 104 00:03:41,876 --> 00:03:44,120 Dr. Earl Joseph to L 105 00:03:46,778 --> 00:03:48,262 Meadow, Will. 106 00:03:48,262 --> 00:03:49,815 Um, we're a teaching hospital, 107 00:03:49,815 --> 00:03:51,196 and these are our first years. 108 00:03:51,196 --> 00:03:52,473 Is it okay if they stay? 109 00:03:52,473 --> 00:03:53,819 You can say no. 110 00:03:53,819 --> 00:03:55,545 Uh, i-it should be okay. 111 00:03:55,545 --> 00:03:57,202 Baby? 112 00:03:58,238 --> 00:03:59,273 [ Baby cries ] 113 00:04:03,208 --> 00:04:04,761 Dr. Kwan. 114 00:04:07,247 --> 00:04:09,697 Arlo Fischer, delivered by Dr. Wilson two weeks ago, 115 00:04:09,697 --> 00:04:12,528 and diagnosed with truncus arteriosus and VSD. 116 00:04:12,528 --> 00:04:14,875 He's been listed for a transplant for heart failure, 117 00:04:14,875 --> 00:04:17,291 and he was placed on ECMO a week ago. 118 00:04:17,291 --> 00:04:19,983 Arlo's deterioration is sending him into organ failure. 119 00:04:19,983 --> 00:04:22,365 We got a call from UNOS last night that there is a match, 120 00:04:22,365 --> 00:04:24,471 but the procurement team reported 121 00:04:24,471 --> 00:04:26,576 that the donor heart muscle is weak 122 00:04:26,576 --> 00:04:28,682 and not suitable for transplantation. 123 00:04:28,682 --> 00:04:30,200 Winston: But Dr. Pierce and I believe 124 00:04:30,200 --> 00:04:31,581 that we can still make use of the heart 125 00:04:31,581 --> 00:04:33,825 if we transplant only the two major arteries. 126 00:04:33,825 --> 00:04:35,205 So, it's a partial heart transplant? 127 00:04:35,205 --> 00:04:36,759 Has that ever been done before? 128 00:04:36,759 --> 00:04:39,209 No, this will be the first. 129 00:04:39,209 --> 00:04:41,419 Meadow: [ Sniffles ] I don't understand. 130 00:04:41,419 --> 00:04:43,041 Why can't we just wait on another heart? 131 00:04:43,041 --> 00:04:45,802 Meadow, it could take months to find another match. 132 00:04:45,802 --> 00:04:47,977 Arlo cannot stay on ECMO for that long. 133 00:04:47,977 --> 00:04:50,186 Baby, she's saying partial is better than nothing. 134 00:04:50,186 --> 00:04:52,188 We know this is frightening, but if this works, 135 00:04:52,188 --> 00:04:54,535 these valves will grow with him for the rest of his life, 136 00:04:54,535 --> 00:04:56,226 and he won't need a heart transplant 137 00:04:56,226 --> 00:04:58,090 or any other additional surgeries. 138 00:04:58,090 --> 00:05:01,577 If this works. What if it doesn't work? 139 00:05:01,577 --> 00:05:04,234 He dies? My baby dies? 140 00:05:05,926 --> 00:05:08,998 We're gonna give you some time to think about it. 141 00:05:08,998 --> 00:05:10,655 We really do believe that this is 142 00:05:10,655 --> 00:05:12,898 Arlo's best option at this point. 143 00:05:14,693 --> 00:05:15,901 [ Crying ] 144 00:05:18,076 --> 00:05:19,629 Can you... Jo: I can stay. 145 00:05:19,629 --> 00:05:21,079 Yes, Of course. 146 00:05:21,079 --> 00:05:22,183 - Thank you, Doctor. - Yeah. 147 00:05:22,183 --> 00:05:31,814 ♪ 148 00:05:31,814 --> 00:05:32,849 [ Knock on door ] 149 00:05:32,849 --> 00:05:34,023 Come in. 150 00:05:37,889 --> 00:05:39,200 Hey. Hi. 151 00:05:39,200 --> 00:05:40,478 [ Door closes ] 152 00:05:40,478 --> 00:05:42,134 Heard it's your last day. It is. 153 00:05:43,895 --> 00:05:45,206 Thanks for coming. 154 00:05:45,206 --> 00:05:47,208 I went by the house. 155 00:05:47,208 --> 00:05:48,831 It's nice to see it's still standing. 156 00:05:48,831 --> 00:05:51,040 There's a giant hole where the attic used to be. 157 00:05:51,040 --> 00:05:53,214 They've spent the last two weeks stabilizing the place, 158 00:05:53,214 --> 00:05:55,216 but everything still reeks of smoke. 159 00:05:55,216 --> 00:05:57,357 It's... How are the kids? 160 00:05:57,357 --> 00:05:59,462 Zola's excited to start at her new school. 161 00:05:59,462 --> 00:06:02,016 I think Bailey and Ellis are sad to leave. 162 00:06:02,016 --> 00:06:03,328 I called, you know? 163 00:06:03,328 --> 00:06:04,433 I know. 164 00:06:05,675 --> 00:06:07,539 This has been a lot. 165 00:06:07,539 --> 00:06:11,163 A fire, living in a hotel, moving. 166 00:06:11,163 --> 00:06:12,924 No, I know it's been a lot, but what-- what was your plan? 167 00:06:12,924 --> 00:06:14,339 You were just gonna leave and not call me back? 168 00:06:14,339 --> 00:06:15,651 And you're gonna move across the country 169 00:06:15,651 --> 00:06:16,928 without a conversation? 170 00:06:16,928 --> 00:06:19,379 I-I-I-I don't get that. I don't. 171 00:06:19,379 --> 00:06:20,690 I didn't know what to say. 172 00:06:20,690 --> 00:06:22,071 I moved here to be with you. 173 00:06:22,071 --> 00:06:23,279 Yes, I took a job, but I moved here 174 00:06:23,279 --> 00:06:25,246 to be with you. 175 00:06:25,246 --> 00:06:27,283 You didn't say it back. 176 00:06:28,698 --> 00:06:29,975 I didn't say what back? 177 00:06:29,975 --> 00:06:31,874 You s-- [ Sighs ] 178 00:06:31,874 --> 00:06:33,876 What? 179 00:06:33,876 --> 00:06:35,325 I said, "I love you." 180 00:06:35,325 --> 00:06:37,327 You were standing exactly in that spot 181 00:06:37,327 --> 00:06:38,639 where you are right now. 182 00:06:38,639 --> 00:06:39,916 I said, "I love you." 183 00:06:39,916 --> 00:06:41,504 You didn't say it back. 184 00:06:41,504 --> 00:06:44,507 You had just taken a job at my hospital. 185 00:06:44,507 --> 00:06:46,647 I thought-- I had hoped 186 00:06:46,647 --> 00:06:48,373 that we were gonna pick it up 187 00:06:48,373 --> 00:06:50,375 right where we left off. 188 00:06:50,375 --> 00:06:52,342 But you seemed to want to take it slow. 189 00:06:52,342 --> 00:06:55,173 So, it did not occur to me 190 00:06:55,173 --> 00:06:57,624 to confer with you about me moving. 191 00:06:57,624 --> 00:06:59,246 Okay, so wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, whoa. 192 00:06:59,246 --> 00:07:00,868 This-- So, this is on me? 193 00:07:00,868 --> 00:07:02,180 This whole thing, it's my fault? 194 00:07:02,180 --> 00:07:03,492 That is not what I just said. 195 00:07:03,492 --> 00:07:05,528 I-I didn't do and say exactly what you thought 196 00:07:05,528 --> 00:07:07,496 I should do and say on exactly your timeline, 197 00:07:07,496 --> 00:07:09,567 so this whole mess is my fault. 198 00:07:09,567 --> 00:07:11,016 That's what you're saying? That is not what I said. 199 00:07:11,016 --> 00:07:12,811 No, no. Nope. 200 00:07:12,811 --> 00:07:13,881 I can't.[ Door opens ] 201 00:07:13,881 --> 00:07:15,193 I can't. 202 00:07:15,193 --> 00:07:26,238 ♪ 203 00:07:31,554 --> 00:07:33,556 So essentially, we will take out the truncus 204 00:07:33,556 --> 00:07:35,144 and the malformed artery, 205 00:07:35,144 --> 00:07:36,973 replace it with the donor aorta and pulmonary trunk, 206 00:07:36,973 --> 00:07:39,389 and then use their walls to close the VSD. 207 00:07:39,389 --> 00:07:40,701 So it's like gutting the inside of a house 208 00:07:40,701 --> 00:07:42,185 without disturbing the frames. 209 00:07:42,185 --> 00:07:43,566 Can you not use the word "gutting" when talking 210 00:07:43,566 --> 00:07:44,705 about a tiny baby heart? 211 00:07:44,705 --> 00:07:46,569 Mm, cosign. 212 00:07:46,569 --> 00:07:48,157 I don't like the verbiage, but it is a pretty apt metaphor. 213 00:07:48,157 --> 00:07:49,986 Do we get to scrub in? 214 00:07:49,986 --> 00:07:52,195 There will only be room for one of you at the table. 215 00:07:52,195 --> 00:07:54,370 We are operating on a heart the size of a strawberry. 216 00:07:54,370 --> 00:07:56,406 The vessels are half a centimeter wide. 217 00:07:56,406 --> 00:07:58,167 My hands are the smallest! 218 00:07:58,167 --> 00:07:59,858 You will not be stitching. You will be observing. 219 00:07:59,858 --> 00:08:02,689 But whoever does the best vascular anastomosis 220 00:08:02,689 --> 00:08:05,381 in the skills lab wins the spot. 221 00:08:06,865 --> 00:08:08,177 Dr. Kwan. 222 00:08:08,177 --> 00:08:09,627 Yeah? 223 00:08:09,627 --> 00:08:11,387 Uh, don't do your finger agility exercises 224 00:08:11,387 --> 00:08:12,906 in front of the patients, alright? 225 00:08:12,906 --> 00:08:14,908 Oh, it's a technique I use to disengage 226 00:08:14,908 --> 00:08:16,081 from the emotionality. 227 00:08:17,600 --> 00:08:19,326 To stay neutral. 228 00:08:19,326 --> 00:08:20,638 Y-You know, when-- when the mother 229 00:08:20,638 --> 00:08:22,363 started crying, I was... 230 00:08:22,363 --> 00:08:24,642 It's smart. You just can't let them see it, Kwan. 231 00:08:24,642 --> 00:08:26,229 Understood. 232 00:08:27,921 --> 00:08:29,232 [ Sighs ] 233 00:08:29,232 --> 00:08:30,268 [ Door opens, closes ] 234 00:08:30,268 --> 00:08:31,511 Teddy: Richard! 235 00:08:31,511 --> 00:08:33,064 Just curious how it's going. 236 00:08:33,064 --> 00:08:34,583 The search for the new chief. 237 00:08:34,583 --> 00:08:36,377 It was easy a few years ago 238 00:08:36,377 --> 00:08:38,138 when we were at the top of our game. Right. 239 00:08:38,138 --> 00:08:39,967 But we've got a lot of interesting applicants 240 00:08:39,967 --> 00:08:41,555 we're sorting through, yeah. 241 00:08:41,555 --> 00:08:43,902 I mean, Grey-Sloan is not an easy place 242 00:08:43,902 --> 00:08:45,663 just to step right into.[ Chuckles ] 243 00:08:45,663 --> 00:08:47,975 It's got its own history, its-- its own quirks, 244 00:08:47,975 --> 00:08:49,252 its own personality. 245 00:08:49,252 --> 00:08:50,909 Well, that it does. [ Chuckles ] 246 00:08:50,909 --> 00:08:54,188 Yeah. I mean, it-- it wouldn't be the-- the worst idea 247 00:08:54,188 --> 00:08:55,845 to look closer to home. 248 00:08:55,845 --> 00:08:57,226 Someone who's been here, 249 00:08:57,226 --> 00:08:59,504 who-- who understands our history, 250 00:08:59,504 --> 00:09:02,818 the issues, and-- and our past and our needs. 251 00:09:02,818 --> 00:09:06,097 Altman, I think you're onto something. 252 00:09:06,097 --> 00:09:08,375 T-There's no extra pay involved, 253 00:09:08,375 --> 00:09:09,514 but there's lots of free pastries 254 00:09:09,514 --> 00:09:11,378 and we could use your expertise. 255 00:09:11,378 --> 00:09:13,863 I-I'm sorry, there's no extra pay? 256 00:09:13,863 --> 00:09:15,520 No, the search committee is voluntary. 257 00:09:15,520 --> 00:09:17,073 But we'd love to have you. 258 00:09:17,073 --> 00:09:18,903 We're meeting in the second floor conference room 259 00:09:18,903 --> 00:09:21,491 from 4:00 to 6:00 on Monday. 260 00:09:21,491 --> 00:09:23,183 Okay, got it. Thank you. 261 00:09:23,183 --> 00:09:24,529 I will... 262 00:09:24,529 --> 00:09:26,013 join. Great. 263 00:09:26,013 --> 00:09:27,083 Yeah. [ Chuckles ] Thank you. 264 00:09:27,083 --> 00:09:28,360 Okay. 265 00:09:30,604 --> 00:09:32,641 Meadow, I got a page. Is everything okay? 266 00:09:32,641 --> 00:09:34,125 I can't do it. 267 00:09:35,195 --> 00:09:37,887 I-I can't kiss him goodbye 268 00:09:37,887 --> 00:09:39,751 for what might be forever. 269 00:09:39,751 --> 00:09:41,201 She wants to wait. 270 00:09:42,443 --> 00:09:45,585 W-We want to wait for a whole heart. 271 00:09:45,585 --> 00:09:48,311 An infant donor heart could take up to six months 272 00:09:48,311 --> 00:09:49,347 to find a match. 273 00:09:49,347 --> 00:09:50,659 But we got this one. 274 00:09:50,659 --> 00:09:52,143 This one was a match and it came in days. 275 00:09:52,143 --> 00:09:54,386 - But it was damaged. - I know. 276 00:09:54,386 --> 00:09:56,561 But we could get another match 277 00:09:56,561 --> 00:09:58,080 in the next couple of days. 278 00:09:58,080 --> 00:09:59,978 It could happen. 279 00:09:59,978 --> 00:10:02,602 I know that it's hard, and I know that it's scary, 280 00:10:02,602 --> 00:10:05,570 but Dr. Pierce is as good as it gets 281 00:10:05,570 --> 00:10:07,365 and she is not a risk taker. 282 00:10:07,365 --> 00:10:09,574 She doesn't do experimental surgeries 283 00:10:09,574 --> 00:10:11,507 for practice or for glory. 284 00:10:11,507 --> 00:10:13,992 She is suggesting this because she believes 285 00:10:13,992 --> 00:10:15,373 that she can save Arlo's life. 286 00:10:19,998 --> 00:10:23,484 I don't know how to love my son this much 287 00:10:23,484 --> 00:10:25,728 and send him in for an experimental surgery 288 00:10:25,728 --> 00:10:27,212 that might kill him. 289 00:10:29,387 --> 00:10:30,906 I-I can't do it. 290 00:10:33,598 --> 00:10:35,324 [ Crying ] If he dies in that surgery, 291 00:10:35,324 --> 00:10:38,327 I won't ever be okay again. 292 00:10:38,327 --> 00:10:40,398 Tell Dr. Pierce thank you, but no. 293 00:10:40,398 --> 00:10:42,331 The surgery is off. 294 00:10:42,331 --> 00:10:49,890 ♪ 295 00:10:49,890 --> 00:10:52,548 [ Cries ] 296 00:10:52,548 --> 00:10:58,347 ♪ 297 00:11:04,594 --> 00:11:06,666 Ow! Damn it.[ Glasses clatter ] 298 00:11:06,666 --> 00:11:08,668 You know what? 299 00:11:08,668 --> 00:11:10,048 Screw this. 300 00:11:12,844 --> 00:11:14,674 What? Should I go after her? Blue: Shh. 301 00:11:14,674 --> 00:11:16,399 Some of us are trying to win. 302 00:11:16,399 --> 00:11:18,229 I hate this stitch. 303 00:11:18,229 --> 00:11:21,439 Oh, you have to kinda twirl your wrist like, um... 304 00:11:21,439 --> 00:11:22,716 Here. 305 00:11:24,753 --> 00:11:26,582 Right. 306 00:11:26,582 --> 00:11:28,170 Yeah. 307 00:11:29,585 --> 00:11:30,828 [ Cellphone buzzes ] 308 00:11:30,828 --> 00:11:32,381 - Oh, no. - It's Tessa Hobbes. 309 00:11:32,381 --> 00:11:33,727 Who? 310 00:11:33,727 --> 00:11:35,177 I have no idea. 311 00:11:35,177 --> 00:11:36,557 [ Tweezers clatter ] 312 00:11:36,557 --> 00:11:37,697 Done. 313 00:11:39,008 --> 00:11:40,216 Tessa. What happened? 314 00:11:40,216 --> 00:11:41,562 I'm so sorry. 315 00:11:41,562 --> 00:11:43,219 She came in with severe abdominal pain. 316 00:11:43,219 --> 00:11:46,050 She's a bit hypotensive. Take her to CT. 317 00:11:46,050 --> 00:11:48,052 I-I picked up my groceries. 318 00:11:48,052 --> 00:11:50,054 Tessa, we said no heavy lifting, three months. 319 00:11:50,054 --> 00:11:51,365 It was just a grocery bag, 320 00:11:51,365 --> 00:11:54,265 and I was feeling so great. 321 00:11:54,265 --> 00:11:56,025 And then there was this sharp pain, 322 00:11:56,025 --> 00:11:57,475 like something tore. 323 00:11:57,475 --> 00:11:58,821 And then she drove herself here. 324 00:11:58,821 --> 00:12:00,029 Wh-- You drove yourself? 325 00:12:00,029 --> 00:12:01,134 Well, in retrospect, I can see 326 00:12:01,134 --> 00:12:02,514 that might have been a bad idea. 327 00:12:02,514 --> 00:12:04,344 Tessa, which area hurts exactly? 328 00:12:04,344 --> 00:12:06,208 All of it. The entire abdomen hurts. 329 00:12:06,208 --> 00:12:07,312 Here-- touch right there. 330 00:12:07,312 --> 00:12:08,762 - Ow! - She's tachycardic. 331 00:12:08,762 --> 00:12:10,074 We should take her straight to the O.R. 332 00:12:10,074 --> 00:12:11,523 No, her blood pressure's holding. 333 00:12:11,523 --> 00:12:12,870 Get her to CT first and then call the O.R. 334 00:12:12,870 --> 00:12:14,216 to be on standby. 335 00:12:14,216 --> 00:12:15,735 Skip the line. I'll call ahead. 336 00:12:15,735 --> 00:12:17,184 I really think we should just take her 337 00:12:17,184 --> 00:12:18,427 straight to the O.R.Go! I'll call Marsh. 338 00:12:18,427 --> 00:12:19,566 Someone page Chief Grey! 339 00:12:25,986 --> 00:12:28,161 ♪ Hey, love 340 00:12:28,161 --> 00:12:32,027 - Are you Dr. Hellum? - Who's asking? 341 00:12:32,027 --> 00:12:34,374 Mika Yasuda, first year surgical resident. 342 00:12:34,374 --> 00:12:36,238 It's Helm, and I'm no longer a doctor. 343 00:12:36,238 --> 00:12:37,653 Cool, 'cause I'm barely a doctor 344 00:12:37,653 --> 00:12:38,930 and I'm desperate for a win. 345 00:12:40,794 --> 00:12:42,347 Could you possibly teach me 346 00:12:42,347 --> 00:12:44,902 how to do a perfect microvascular anastomosis? 347 00:12:44,902 --> 00:12:47,042 There's a contest and if I win I get to scrub in 348 00:12:47,042 --> 00:12:48,975 on a partial heart transplant on a newborn. 349 00:12:48,975 --> 00:12:50,700 A partial heart transplant doesn't exist. 350 00:12:50,700 --> 00:12:54,083 I know, but it is about to, and I-I need this. 351 00:12:55,119 --> 00:12:57,155 I need a win because I, uh-- 352 00:12:57,155 --> 00:12:58,363 I don't have anywhere to sleep tonight, 353 00:12:58,363 --> 00:13:00,780 and Seattle is outrageously expensive, 354 00:13:00,780 --> 00:13:04,576 and being a surgical resident is exhausting... 355 00:13:04,576 --> 00:13:06,647 [ Chuckles ] ...to the point of nearly impossible, 356 00:13:06,647 --> 00:13:09,374 and I just really need to give myself a reason to keep caring. 357 00:13:10,582 --> 00:13:13,585 And if Blue wins, I cannot take the gloating. 358 00:13:13,585 --> 00:13:15,242 Blue? Like the ribbon. 359 00:13:15,242 --> 00:13:16,968 And this is a nickname he perpetuates. 360 00:13:16,968 --> 00:13:18,556 Wow. That is arrogant. 361 00:13:18,556 --> 00:13:19,937 Right? 362 00:13:21,593 --> 00:13:23,526 20 bucks. 363 00:13:23,526 --> 00:13:25,977 My house was towed this morning, so I don't have 20 bucks. 364 00:13:25,977 --> 00:13:27,496 But if I win this contest, 365 00:13:27,496 --> 00:13:28,842 I will barback for you on Friday night for free. 366 00:13:28,842 --> 00:13:30,188 You've been a barback? 367 00:13:30,188 --> 00:13:31,362 No, but I've been a cater waiter 368 00:13:31,362 --> 00:13:32,846 and I'm excellent at chopping limes. 369 00:13:32,846 --> 00:13:37,299 ♪ 370 00:13:37,299 --> 00:13:38,576 Give me it. 371 00:13:38,576 --> 00:13:40,820 ♪ 372 00:13:40,820 --> 00:13:43,374 ♪ I love you far 373 00:13:43,374 --> 00:13:45,410 ♪ You know I'm never right 374 00:13:47,688 --> 00:13:51,209 I was treating myself to champagne and fruit salad 375 00:13:51,209 --> 00:13:53,591 because that's what I was craving, 376 00:13:53,591 --> 00:13:56,076 and I had plenty to celebrate. 377 00:13:56,076 --> 00:13:57,802 Now, okay, wait, wait. 378 00:13:59,390 --> 00:14:01,392 [ Shakily ] And then the groceries came. 379 00:14:01,392 --> 00:14:03,394 They left them on the front stoop. 380 00:14:03,394 --> 00:14:05,085 It didn't even o-occur to me 381 00:14:05,085 --> 00:14:07,260 not to bend over and pick them up. 382 00:14:07,260 --> 00:14:08,778 It's routine. 383 00:14:08,778 --> 00:14:11,816 It's muscle memory. 384 00:14:11,816 --> 00:14:14,508 Dr. Griffith, the ring around your necklace-- 385 00:14:14,508 --> 00:14:15,889 are you engaged? 386 00:14:15,889 --> 00:14:17,477 I-I was. I was engaged. 387 00:14:17,477 --> 00:14:19,065 Now I'm not. 388 00:14:20,031 --> 00:14:22,033 Heartbreak is the worst. 389 00:14:22,033 --> 00:14:23,724 It is. 390 00:14:23,724 --> 00:14:25,692 If I die today, I might even miss heartbreak. 391 00:14:25,692 --> 00:14:26,900 Please try not to die today. 392 00:14:26,900 --> 00:14:28,660 Yeah, I'll do my best. 393 00:14:28,660 --> 00:14:30,524 Oh, wait. I need my purse. 394 00:14:30,524 --> 00:14:32,147 - Right now? - Yes, where is it? 395 00:14:32,147 --> 00:14:33,182 Uh, it's downstairs with your clothes. 396 00:14:33,182 --> 00:14:34,494 I can get it after we're done here. 397 00:14:34,494 --> 00:14:36,082 Okay. 398 00:14:36,082 --> 00:14:37,911 Meredith: Hey, what happened? 399 00:14:37,911 --> 00:14:40,017 Schmitt said her abdomen is distended and she's tachy. 400 00:14:40,017 --> 00:14:41,604 She's getting more hypotensive. 401 00:14:41,604 --> 00:14:43,710 Okay, well, you two need to go book an O.R. 402 00:14:43,710 --> 00:14:45,574 I don't care if you have to kick someone out to do it. 403 00:14:45,574 --> 00:14:47,472 Tessa takes priority. 404 00:14:47,472 --> 00:14:49,992 [ Sighs ] I don't get it. 405 00:14:49,992 --> 00:14:51,511 She did this for groceries? 406 00:14:51,511 --> 00:14:53,685 Well, I don't think she did it on purpose, Nick. 407 00:14:53,685 --> 00:14:56,240 I think she probably lives alone and is set in her ways, 408 00:14:56,240 --> 00:14:58,759 and I'm sure it's a lot for her to change and ask for help. 409 00:14:58,759 --> 00:15:00,485 Hello? 410 00:15:00,485 --> 00:15:02,763 We're here, Tessa. Please stay very still. 411 00:15:02,763 --> 00:15:05,559 I'm afraid. This is all wrong. 412 00:15:05,559 --> 00:15:06,940 I-I don't want to die. 413 00:15:06,940 --> 00:15:08,355 [ Breathes shakily ] 414 00:15:08,355 --> 00:15:10,254 I still have something to say. 415 00:15:10,254 --> 00:15:11,980 Tessa, you're not going anywhere today. 416 00:15:11,980 --> 00:15:13,188 We've got you. 417 00:15:13,188 --> 00:15:14,568 She's bleeding out. 418 00:15:14,568 --> 00:15:16,467 We're gonna need some help in here. 419 00:15:16,467 --> 00:15:18,745 We're gonna need blood in the O.R. 420 00:15:18,745 --> 00:15:20,712 Tessa, we're gonna take you upstairs. 421 00:15:22,024 --> 00:15:23,577 Amelia: So on a scale of one to better? 422 00:15:23,577 --> 00:15:25,752 We're better. I think. I think we're better. 423 00:15:25,752 --> 00:15:28,134 But you're not sure? 424 00:15:28,134 --> 00:15:30,377 I am sure that we are both excited 425 00:15:30,377 --> 00:15:32,932 about this partial heart transplant on an infant, 426 00:15:32,932 --> 00:15:34,554 which is a stroke-of-genius idea 427 00:15:34,554 --> 00:15:36,211 that we came up with together. 428 00:15:36,211 --> 00:15:39,214 And that is because in the O.R., we're good together. 429 00:15:39,214 --> 00:15:41,595 In our chosen field of study, we are so good. 430 00:15:41,595 --> 00:15:43,080 Are you rehearsing a speech you plan on 431 00:15:43,080 --> 00:15:44,702 - giving him later? - Maybe a little. 432 00:15:44,702 --> 00:15:46,773 So the two of you haven't really spoken since the fire. 433 00:15:46,773 --> 00:15:48,740 Oh, we said some things. 434 00:15:48,740 --> 00:15:50,328 We needed a cooling-off period. 435 00:15:50,328 --> 00:15:52,537 It's best that we haven't talked about it. 436 00:15:52,537 --> 00:15:55,747 A-And, you know, we'll talk again soon. 437 00:15:55,747 --> 00:15:58,129 As soon as we change medical history. 438 00:15:58,129 --> 00:16:00,338 I have bad news. 439 00:16:00,338 --> 00:16:01,305 Oh, no. The baby? 440 00:16:01,305 --> 00:16:02,858 No, he's stable. 441 00:16:02,858 --> 00:16:04,342 But his mom's too scared. 442 00:16:04,342 --> 00:16:06,034 She wants to call it off. 443 00:16:06,034 --> 00:16:08,381 I can't talk her into it. That would be unethical. 444 00:16:08,381 --> 00:16:10,659 But you think she's got this one wrong? 445 00:16:10,659 --> 00:16:13,696 Without this surgery, the baby has days to live. 446 00:16:13,696 --> 00:16:16,216 She had a 30-hour labor and she did it without any meds. 447 00:16:16,216 --> 00:16:18,011 - Meaning? - She's a warrior. 448 00:16:18,011 --> 00:16:19,426 She's strong in her convictions, 449 00:16:19,426 --> 00:16:21,428 and she seems sure of what she wants. 450 00:16:22,843 --> 00:16:24,328 Let me talk to her. 451 00:16:24,328 --> 00:16:25,639 You can't. 452 00:16:25,639 --> 00:16:26,778 I'm not her doctor. 453 00:16:28,194 --> 00:16:29,264 Let me talk to her. 454 00:16:31,714 --> 00:16:34,407 Will: You're a neurosurgeon, so do you think Arlo needs-- 455 00:16:34,407 --> 00:16:35,891 No, no, no. No. 456 00:16:35,891 --> 00:16:37,651 No, I'm not here as one of Arlo's doctors. 457 00:16:37,651 --> 00:16:40,206 I'm sorry, but if you're here to try to talk me into-- 458 00:16:40,206 --> 00:16:42,173 I'm here because I had a baby 459 00:16:42,173 --> 00:16:45,038 who only lived for 43 minutes. 460 00:16:45,038 --> 00:16:47,075 He had a condition called anencephaly, 461 00:16:47,075 --> 00:16:50,595 which is when the baby's brain does not develop typically, 462 00:16:50,595 --> 00:16:54,392 and, uh, we discovered it when I was 6 months pregnant. 463 00:16:54,392 --> 00:16:56,222 We didn't know. 464 00:16:56,222 --> 00:16:57,533 We didn't know until he was born 465 00:16:57,533 --> 00:16:59,052 that there was anything wrong. 466 00:16:59,052 --> 00:17:00,329 I gave birth to Christopher 467 00:17:00,329 --> 00:17:02,228 knowing that he would be an organ donor, 468 00:17:02,228 --> 00:17:04,230 uh, because there was nothing that we could do. 469 00:17:04,230 --> 00:17:07,302 There was no surgery that we could try. 470 00:17:07,302 --> 00:17:11,754 And, um, I think about him a lot these days 471 00:17:11,754 --> 00:17:16,069 because he has a brother now, named Scout, 472 00:17:16,069 --> 00:17:17,553 and as Scout grows up, 473 00:17:17,553 --> 00:17:19,176 I cannot help but think about 474 00:17:19,176 --> 00:17:20,694 who Christopher would have been. 475 00:17:21,695 --> 00:17:24,560 And, um... 476 00:17:24,560 --> 00:17:28,047 what I do know is [sighs] 477 00:17:28,047 --> 00:17:30,911 if there had been a chance 478 00:17:30,911 --> 00:17:32,189 that Christopher could have lived, 479 00:17:32,189 --> 00:17:34,053 if there had been any hope, 480 00:17:34,053 --> 00:17:36,331 if there had been any surgery 481 00:17:36,331 --> 00:17:40,473 and it meant that he might live... 482 00:17:40,473 --> 00:17:42,164 I would take the shot. 483 00:17:50,207 --> 00:17:52,519 [ Alarm beeping ] 484 00:17:52,519 --> 00:17:59,561 ♪ 485 00:17:59,561 --> 00:18:01,183 I knew it. 486 00:18:01,183 --> 00:18:02,702 I knew we should have taken her straight to the O.R. 487 00:18:02,702 --> 00:18:03,806 We needed the CT to see if we could operate-- 488 00:18:03,806 --> 00:18:06,154 My gut doesn't lie. 489 00:18:06,154 --> 00:18:07,845 And I should have fought for it. 490 00:18:07,845 --> 00:18:09,743 We should have brought her straight here. 491 00:18:15,128 --> 00:18:16,647 Yeah, I'm number one. 492 00:18:16,647 --> 00:18:18,062 Ew, someone likes himself. 493 00:18:18,062 --> 00:18:21,030 No, my sample is literally number one. 494 00:18:21,030 --> 00:18:22,825 But yes, I intend to win. 495 00:18:22,825 --> 00:18:25,414 What is that face? Is that good? 496 00:18:25,414 --> 00:18:27,209 It is if you want to go home early. 497 00:18:27,209 --> 00:18:28,831 I knew I shouldn't have practiced on bananas. 498 00:18:28,831 --> 00:18:31,386 What about fruit says "baby veins" to you? 499 00:18:31,386 --> 00:18:33,146 This is all good work. 500 00:18:33,146 --> 00:18:35,769 Number one's sutures are particularly precise. 501 00:18:38,427 --> 00:18:41,154 But with perfect alignment and tension, 502 00:18:41,154 --> 00:18:43,639 the winner is number three. 503 00:18:43,639 --> 00:18:45,745 That's me! 504 00:18:45,745 --> 00:18:49,024 Guess we gotta call you Red today, huh? 505 00:18:49,024 --> 00:18:50,198 [ Sniffles ] Hm. 506 00:18:50,198 --> 00:18:52,338 [ Sirens wailing ] 507 00:18:52,338 --> 00:19:16,051 ♪ 508 00:19:16,051 --> 00:19:17,570 Scalpel. 509 00:19:17,570 --> 00:19:28,097 ♪ 510 00:19:28,097 --> 00:19:30,099 I thought you would win. 511 00:19:30,099 --> 00:19:32,067 Your stitches are typically excellent. 512 00:19:32,067 --> 00:19:33,379 I know. 513 00:19:33,379 --> 00:19:35,415 Better than Yasuda's. 514 00:19:35,415 --> 00:19:37,176 I tanked the contest 515 00:19:37,176 --> 00:19:39,523 because babies scare the crap out of me.[ Chuckles ] 516 00:19:39,523 --> 00:19:41,214 Didn't want to be anywhere near that table. 517 00:19:41,214 --> 00:19:42,767 Why are you scared of babies? 518 00:19:44,079 --> 00:19:45,218 Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. 519 00:19:45,218 --> 00:19:46,219 You gotta tell me. Come on. 520 00:19:46,219 --> 00:19:48,670 Okay, but you owe me one. 521 00:19:48,670 --> 00:19:49,705 Owe you what? 522 00:19:49,705 --> 00:19:50,982 Whatever I decide. 523 00:19:50,982 --> 00:19:52,398 Fine. 524 00:19:54,262 --> 00:19:57,644 When I was 5, my dad took me into the backyard 525 00:19:57,644 --> 00:20:02,097 where my mom had just given birth to my brother 526 00:20:02,097 --> 00:20:03,685 in a kiddie pool. 527 00:20:03,685 --> 00:20:05,238 [ Inhales deeply ] 528 00:20:05,238 --> 00:20:07,240 Now, you've done an OB rotation. 529 00:20:07,240 --> 00:20:10,105 You're acquainted with all the blood and placenta 530 00:20:10,105 --> 00:20:12,901 and the literal horror movie that is human child birth. 531 00:20:12,901 --> 00:20:15,283 And I'm sure it's all very beautiful in its own way, 532 00:20:15,283 --> 00:20:17,008 but I was 5. 533 00:20:17,008 --> 00:20:19,252 And before I could fully process what I was seeing, 534 00:20:19,252 --> 00:20:21,461 my dad handed me a pair of scissors 535 00:20:21,461 --> 00:20:23,636 and told me to cut the umbilical cord. 536 00:20:23,636 --> 00:20:24,878 Wait, you were 5? 537 00:20:24,878 --> 00:20:26,225 Yeah. 538 00:20:26,225 --> 00:20:28,572 [ Stifled laughter ] 539 00:20:28,572 --> 00:20:30,677 What, you think this is funny? 540 00:20:30,677 --> 00:20:32,921 This is trauma. 541 00:20:32,921 --> 00:20:35,164 This is-- This is crystal-loving, 542 00:20:35,164 --> 00:20:38,029 weed-smoking, latter-day hippie-style trauma. 543 00:20:38,029 --> 00:20:40,308 [ Laughter ] Zola: Shh! 544 00:20:40,308 --> 00:20:42,102 Sorry to shush you, but my aunt 545 00:20:42,102 --> 00:20:43,414 is making history right now, 546 00:20:43,414 --> 00:20:45,451 and I think we should all be paying attention. 547 00:20:47,901 --> 00:21:02,675 ♪ I've had my heart get swallowed ♪ 548 00:21:02,675 --> 00:21:05,229 [ Monitor alarm ] 549 00:21:05,229 --> 00:21:07,542 ♪ And dragged down to the deep ♪ 550 00:21:11,511 --> 00:21:15,239 ♪ But I made it to tomorrow 551 00:21:17,724 --> 00:21:21,107 ♪ So I believe 552 00:21:23,696 --> 00:21:28,563 ♪ After all these years of trying ♪ 553 00:21:30,358 --> 00:21:34,914 ♪ Weighing on these tired bones ♪ 554 00:21:37,019 --> 00:21:41,541 ♪ If there's something I'll take with me ♪ 555 00:21:41,541 --> 00:21:42,715 [ Flatline ] 556 00:21:42,715 --> 00:21:44,164 Starting compressions. 557 00:21:44,164 --> 00:21:45,890 [ Flatline ] 558 00:21:45,890 --> 00:21:47,858 ♪ Let it be hope 559 00:21:47,858 --> 00:21:49,169 Come on, Tessa. 560 00:21:49,169 --> 00:21:52,552 ♪ Yeah, let it be hope 561 00:21:52,552 --> 00:21:55,900 ♪ Yeah, let it be 562 00:21:55,900 --> 00:21:58,800 ♪ Let it be hope 563 00:21:58,800 --> 00:22:00,042 ♪ Let it be 564 00:22:00,042 --> 00:22:02,044 Come on, Tessa. Fight. 565 00:22:02,044 --> 00:22:03,356 Nick: Mer. 566 00:22:03,356 --> 00:22:04,875 Meredith, let Griffith take over. 567 00:22:04,875 --> 00:22:08,499 ♪ After all these years of trying ♪ 568 00:22:11,088 --> 00:22:15,575 ♪ Weighing on these tired bones ♪ 569 00:22:17,715 --> 00:22:22,306 ♪ If there's something I'll take with me ♪ 570 00:22:23,514 --> 00:22:25,067 ♪ Mm-mmm 571 00:22:26,690 --> 00:22:29,831 ♪ Let it be hope 572 00:22:29,831 --> 00:22:33,144 ♪ Yeah, let it be hope 573 00:22:33,144 --> 00:22:34,422 ♪ Yeah, let it be 574 00:22:36,596 --> 00:22:38,667 ♪ Let it be hope 575 00:22:39,875 --> 00:22:41,083 ♪ Yeah, let it be 576 00:22:42,878 --> 00:22:46,399 ♪ Yeah, let it be hope 577 00:22:46,399 --> 00:22:48,228 Meredith: Griffith, it's time to stop. 578 00:22:49,678 --> 00:22:52,854 ♪ Let it be hope 579 00:22:52,854 --> 00:22:53,855 [ Exhales deeply ] 580 00:22:53,855 --> 00:22:55,753 ♪ Let it be hope 581 00:22:55,753 --> 00:22:57,168 [ Flatline ] 582 00:22:57,168 --> 00:22:58,411 Simone: Oh, God. 583 00:22:58,411 --> 00:23:00,689 [ Flatline ] 584 00:23:03,105 --> 00:23:04,900 Oh, my God. No. [ Sniffles ] 585 00:23:04,900 --> 00:23:07,731 ♪ Let it be hope 586 00:23:10,699 --> 00:23:12,908 Time of death 12:21. 587 00:23:16,360 --> 00:23:20,260 Chief Grey, I'd like to close her up. 588 00:23:20,260 --> 00:23:21,365 I'd like to pay her that respect. 589 00:23:26,922 --> 00:23:28,924 Can I help? Yeah. 590 00:23:28,924 --> 00:23:30,512 [ Door opens ] 591 00:23:40,177 --> 00:23:42,559 [ Exhales deeply ] 592 00:23:46,459 --> 00:23:49,151 That was so incredibly stupid. 593 00:23:49,151 --> 00:23:50,429 That did not have to end that way. 594 00:23:50,429 --> 00:23:52,085 I hate this day. 595 00:23:52,085 --> 00:23:53,673 I hate everything about this day. 596 00:23:53,673 --> 00:23:55,261 Me, too. 597 00:24:01,370 --> 00:24:03,200 I-I'm a-- I-I'm a transplant surgeon. 598 00:24:03,200 --> 00:24:05,547 I-I wait. I'm trained to wait. 599 00:24:05,547 --> 00:24:08,170 I attach, I perfuse, I wait for the organ to take. 600 00:24:08,170 --> 00:24:10,379 For it not to be rejected. 601 00:24:10,379 --> 00:24:13,037 For it to pink up. For blood to flow. 602 00:24:13,037 --> 00:24:15,005 Because that's how humans respond. 603 00:24:15,005 --> 00:24:17,904 They're not machines with an on/off switch. 604 00:24:17,904 --> 00:24:19,319 [ Sighs ] 605 00:24:19,319 --> 00:24:21,632 And I'm a grown woman with a big life 606 00:24:21,632 --> 00:24:23,047 and a big career and three kids. 607 00:24:23,047 --> 00:24:25,222 And this move is what my daughter needs. 608 00:24:25,222 --> 00:24:27,845 I want you in my life if you want to be in my life. 609 00:24:29,053 --> 00:24:31,193 But if I have to choose, I'm going to pick me. 610 00:24:31,193 --> 00:24:34,265 I pick my kids, and I pick what's best for us. 611 00:24:34,265 --> 00:24:36,751 And I am not going to beg you to love me. 612 00:24:41,549 --> 00:24:43,378 [ Sighs ] 613 00:24:43,378 --> 00:24:45,691 [ Door opens, closes ] 614 00:24:54,389 --> 00:24:56,218 [ Exhales deeply ] 615 00:24:57,461 --> 00:25:00,084 [ Siren wails in distance ] 616 00:25:00,084 --> 00:25:01,672 I'm sorry I was emotional earlier. 617 00:25:04,364 --> 00:25:07,575 Be sorry when you stop feeling the losses. 618 00:25:07,575 --> 00:25:09,059 This was my last surgery here. 619 00:25:11,268 --> 00:25:13,822 I thought for sure I was going out on a high. 620 00:25:13,822 --> 00:25:15,652 I know that sounds shallow. 621 00:25:15,652 --> 00:25:17,999 No, it's devastating, on every level. 622 00:25:20,933 --> 00:25:22,521 How's your grandmother? 623 00:25:22,521 --> 00:25:24,074 Awful. It's awful. 624 00:25:24,074 --> 00:25:26,525 She exclusively calls me by my mother's name now, 625 00:25:26,525 --> 00:25:27,905 which I can handle. I didn't know my mother. 626 00:25:27,905 --> 00:25:30,252 But my sister, she remembers my mother, 627 00:25:30,252 --> 00:25:31,668 she remembers that I killed her. 628 00:25:31,668 --> 00:25:34,429 She was 6 when it happened and... 629 00:25:34,429 --> 00:25:37,225 she's never forgiven me for it. 630 00:25:37,225 --> 00:25:39,054 And every time my grandmother calls me 631 00:25:39,054 --> 00:25:41,229 by my mother's name, she hates me more, 632 00:25:41,229 --> 00:25:43,024 and I don't know why I'm telling you this, Chief Grey. 633 00:25:45,267 --> 00:25:48,029 Well, because you know I know. 634 00:25:48,029 --> 00:25:49,375 And I don't work here anymore, 635 00:25:49,375 --> 00:25:51,653 so you can call me Meredith. 636 00:25:54,553 --> 00:25:55,899 I have Tessa's book, Meredith. 637 00:25:57,279 --> 00:25:59,040 - What? - She wrote her last book. 638 00:25:59,040 --> 00:26:00,800 She saved it on a thumb drive, 639 00:26:00,800 --> 00:26:02,250 and she brought it here to the hospital, 640 00:26:02,250 --> 00:26:03,527 which means after she felt her pain, 641 00:26:03,527 --> 00:26:04,908 the first thing she did 642 00:26:04,908 --> 00:26:06,150 is go to her computer and save her book. 643 00:26:06,150 --> 00:26:08,532 ♪ 644 00:26:08,532 --> 00:26:10,983 She wanted me to give it to her publisher in Boston, 645 00:26:10,983 --> 00:26:13,710 and, um, I know you're-- you're going there today. 646 00:26:13,710 --> 00:26:16,229 ♪ Your color's fading 647 00:26:17,196 --> 00:26:19,750 ♪ 'Cause I kept you waiting 648 00:26:19,750 --> 00:26:21,994 ♪ It's a wild, wild world 649 00:26:21,994 --> 00:26:24,134 I'm so happy she got to write her last story. 650 00:26:24,134 --> 00:26:28,172 ♪ And you're a wild, wild girl ♪ 651 00:26:30,105 --> 00:26:31,866 Chief Grey? Meredith? 652 00:26:31,866 --> 00:26:33,177 ♪ Our sun's still shining 653 00:26:33,177 --> 00:26:35,248 ♪ But it seems half the size I'm sorry. 654 00:26:35,248 --> 00:26:37,354 ♪ And it's a wild, wild world 655 00:26:37,354 --> 00:26:39,080 My mentor once told me you worry 656 00:26:39,080 --> 00:26:41,289 when you stop feeling the losses. 657 00:26:45,396 --> 00:26:50,298 ♪ Before my time runs out [ Sighs ] Let's go inside. 658 00:26:51,437 --> 00:26:57,236 ♪ What if I run away to Mars? 659 00:26:59,548 --> 00:27:01,171 ♪ Would you find me in the stars? ♪ 660 00:27:01,171 --> 00:27:02,966 The heart is completely pumping on its own. 661 00:27:02,966 --> 00:27:09,593 ♪ Would you miss me in the end? ♪ 662 00:27:09,593 --> 00:27:11,043 It worked? 663 00:27:11,043 --> 00:27:12,216 So far, yeah. So far, it worked, yeah. 664 00:27:12,216 --> 00:27:15,841 ♪ If I run out of oxygen 665 00:27:15,841 --> 00:27:17,187 ♪ When I run away 666 00:27:17,187 --> 00:27:18,844 Amelia, thank you. 667 00:27:18,844 --> 00:27:22,571 ♪ To Mars 668 00:27:22,571 --> 00:27:25,264 [ Exhales deeply ] 669 00:27:25,264 --> 00:27:29,026 Echo looks great. VSD is closed. 670 00:27:29,026 --> 00:27:31,373 Outflow from the new arteries looks good. 671 00:27:31,373 --> 00:27:32,823 It sure feels like we saved that baby's life. 672 00:27:32,823 --> 00:27:34,480 [ Chuckles ] 673 00:27:34,480 --> 00:27:37,069 [ Sighs ] 674 00:27:37,069 --> 00:27:39,865 Are you taking in the miracle? 675 00:27:39,865 --> 00:27:42,419 That is exactly what I'm doing. 676 00:27:42,419 --> 00:27:44,352 That was beyond my wildest imagination 677 00:27:44,352 --> 00:27:45,802 of what my day would be. 678 00:27:45,802 --> 00:27:47,666 And not just this day, which was awful 679 00:27:47,666 --> 00:27:49,564 because my house-van got towed with my whole life in it. 680 00:27:49,564 --> 00:27:52,222 That was beyond my wildest imagination 681 00:27:52,222 --> 00:27:54,431 of what any day of my life could be. 682 00:27:54,431 --> 00:27:57,745 The way that you saved that tiny baby heart. 683 00:27:57,745 --> 00:27:58,815 I will never forget it. 684 00:27:58,815 --> 00:28:00,057 Did you say house-van? 685 00:28:00,057 --> 00:28:01,369 Yeah, you sleep in a van? 686 00:28:01,369 --> 00:28:03,682 Oh, well, I can't afford to get it out of impound, 687 00:28:03,682 --> 00:28:05,684 so not tonight. 688 00:28:05,684 --> 00:28:07,686 Anyway, thank you. 689 00:28:07,686 --> 00:28:12,069 ♪ Mars 690 00:28:12,069 --> 00:28:17,316 ♪ Would you find me in the stars? ♪ 691 00:28:17,316 --> 00:28:19,525 Aunt Amy, how did you do it? 692 00:28:19,525 --> 00:28:21,147 How did I do what? 693 00:28:21,147 --> 00:28:22,908 How did you stop caring what other people think? 694 00:28:22,908 --> 00:28:25,531 My mom, your sisters, they talk about you like-- 695 00:28:25,531 --> 00:28:26,843 like-- like you don't give a flying crap 696 00:28:26,843 --> 00:28:28,499 what anybody else thinks 697 00:28:28,499 --> 00:28:30,709 and, like, they're a little jealous of that. 698 00:28:30,709 --> 00:28:31,951 And I want to know how you did it. 699 00:28:33,608 --> 00:28:36,542 Because I wanted to fight for a patient today. 700 00:28:36,542 --> 00:28:38,751 My gut told me everything she needed and I didn't do it 701 00:28:38,751 --> 00:28:40,649 because I was worried about what other people would think. 702 00:28:40,649 --> 00:28:43,204 I-I was worried about getting in trouble. 703 00:28:43,204 --> 00:28:45,724 You want to know the truth? 704 00:28:45,724 --> 00:28:50,729 The truth is I care deeply what other people think. 705 00:28:50,729 --> 00:28:54,733 And then I do what I think is right anyway. 706 00:28:54,733 --> 00:28:56,493 But I learned that the hard way. 707 00:28:56,493 --> 00:28:58,150 I had to live a lot of life 708 00:28:58,150 --> 00:28:59,496 before I became the kind of person 709 00:28:59,496 --> 00:29:01,187 I like and respect. 710 00:29:04,052 --> 00:29:05,467 My patient died today. 711 00:29:07,676 --> 00:29:08,919 I should have fought. 712 00:29:10,990 --> 00:29:12,889 The good news is... 713 00:29:12,889 --> 00:29:14,442 you let that pain soak in... 714 00:29:16,202 --> 00:29:19,309 ...next time, you will fight. 715 00:29:19,309 --> 00:29:25,177 ♪ 716 00:29:25,177 --> 00:29:27,213 Did you ever find a place to live, Shep? 717 00:29:28,697 --> 00:29:32,184 Uh, yeah, I found a youth hostel with a roach problem. 718 00:29:32,184 --> 00:29:34,220 And please don't call me Shep. 719 00:29:34,220 --> 00:29:36,084 Then don't call me Aunt Amy. 720 00:29:39,467 --> 00:29:40,882 [ Siren wails in distance ] 721 00:29:40,882 --> 00:29:42,504 Is that it? 722 00:29:42,504 --> 00:29:44,127 Straight from the oven from the faraway bakery. 723 00:29:44,127 --> 00:29:47,199 You are truly, madly, deeply the best. 724 00:29:47,199 --> 00:29:49,753 Wow, it's so much bigger than I thought it would be. 725 00:29:49,753 --> 00:29:51,513 I know. It barely fit in my car. 726 00:29:51,513 --> 00:29:53,584 Wait, what do you mean bigger? 727 00:29:53,584 --> 00:29:55,034 Did you check it? 728 00:29:55,034 --> 00:29:56,795 I gave them your name, they gave me a cake. 729 00:30:00,764 --> 00:30:04,768 [ Laughs ] 730 00:30:04,768 --> 00:30:05,873 Well, there's no time to take it back. 731 00:30:05,873 --> 00:30:07,322 What do we do? 732 00:30:07,322 --> 00:30:12,569 ♪ 733 00:30:13,777 --> 00:30:15,158 [ Cork pops ] 734 00:30:17,401 --> 00:30:21,129 ♪ 735 00:30:21,129 --> 00:30:22,579 Oh, hey. 736 00:30:22,579 --> 00:30:32,520 ♪ 737 00:30:32,520 --> 00:30:34,591 Oh. [ Clears throat ] 738 00:30:34,591 --> 00:30:36,420 - Top of my class. - What? 739 00:30:36,420 --> 00:30:38,767 I was top of my class at an East Coast boarding school 740 00:30:38,767 --> 00:30:40,528 where my classmates were doing designer drugs 741 00:30:40,528 --> 00:30:41,909 and cheating their way to a passing grade. 742 00:30:41,909 --> 00:30:43,427 I was top of my class. 743 00:30:43,427 --> 00:30:45,015 And I didn't even drink in high school. 744 00:30:45,015 --> 00:30:46,327 Well, this is sparkling cider. 745 00:30:46,327 --> 00:30:48,501 Then I was second in my class in undergrad, 746 00:30:48,501 --> 00:30:50,883 but that's because I had a brutal case of mono 747 00:30:50,883 --> 00:30:52,816 my junior year, which took me out for weeks, 748 00:30:52,816 --> 00:30:56,233 but in med school, I was back up to number one. 749 00:30:56,233 --> 00:30:59,029 And I completed my cardiothoracic fellowship 750 00:30:59,029 --> 00:31:01,342 at the Mayo Clinic before coming here 751 00:31:01,342 --> 00:31:05,139 and training Cristina Yang as a heart surgeon. 752 00:31:05,139 --> 00:31:07,486 I have an inarguable pedigree and I find it insulting 753 00:31:07,486 --> 00:31:10,213 that you invite me to sit on a panel to choose a chief 754 00:31:10,213 --> 00:31:12,525 without stopping to consider offering me the job. 755 00:31:12,525 --> 00:31:15,425 Teddy, this hospital just came out of a shutdown. 756 00:31:15,425 --> 00:31:17,876 Dr. Bailey and Dr. Grey both quit the job 757 00:31:17,876 --> 00:31:19,153 that you're talking about, 758 00:31:19,153 --> 00:31:21,362 and their pedigree is quite similar to yours. 759 00:31:21,362 --> 00:31:22,881 I didn't consider you for the job 760 00:31:22,881 --> 00:31:24,813 because it is a flailing program 761 00:31:24,813 --> 00:31:26,885 with a huge amount of stress. 762 00:31:26,885 --> 00:31:29,646 But by all means, if you want it, 763 00:31:29,646 --> 00:31:32,062 it's yours. 764 00:31:32,062 --> 00:31:33,546 Really? Is that a yes? 765 00:31:34,754 --> 00:31:35,894 Can I think about it? 766 00:31:40,415 --> 00:31:42,072 What is going on here? 767 00:31:42,072 --> 00:31:44,178 Oh, crap. She's here. Surprise! 768 00:31:44,178 --> 00:31:45,904 All: Surprise! 769 00:31:45,904 --> 00:31:48,009 Aw, Come on, people. You can do better than this. 770 00:31:48,009 --> 00:31:49,666 Okay, ready? 771 00:31:49,666 --> 00:31:51,426 All: Surprise! 772 00:31:51,426 --> 00:31:53,221 [ Chuckles ] 773 00:31:53,221 --> 00:31:54,602 Well, this is very thoughtful. 774 00:31:56,155 --> 00:31:58,364 And ridiculous because I'm only going to Boston, 775 00:31:58,364 --> 00:32:00,504 and you know I'll probably be here next week. 776 00:32:00,504 --> 00:32:02,575 For God's sake, Grey, will you just let us toast you? 777 00:32:02,575 --> 00:32:03,991 [ Laughter ] 778 00:32:03,991 --> 00:32:06,338 To Meredith Grey![ Cheering ] 779 00:32:06,338 --> 00:32:08,064 ♪ Been swimming through shadows ♪ 780 00:32:08,064 --> 00:32:09,755 You know, once upon a time... 781 00:32:09,755 --> 00:32:11,136 ♪ Moonrise 782 00:32:11,136 --> 00:32:14,346 ...you were the bane of my existence. 783 00:32:14,346 --> 00:32:18,315 But, no, you grew up to become 784 00:32:18,315 --> 00:32:21,146 one of my greatest points of pride. 785 00:32:21,146 --> 00:32:22,941 I'm... 786 00:32:22,941 --> 00:32:27,635 ♪ We keep run, run, running from the cold ♪ 787 00:32:30,051 --> 00:32:31,294 To-- Wa-- 788 00:32:31,294 --> 00:32:33,227 ♪ Keep my eyes wide open 789 00:32:33,227 --> 00:32:34,745 Okay, go. Go. 790 00:32:34,745 --> 00:32:39,336 Dr. Grey, what Dr. Bailey is trying to say is... 791 00:32:39,336 --> 00:32:42,753 this place won't be the same without you. 792 00:32:42,753 --> 00:32:46,999 ♪ On my, my way 793 00:32:46,999 --> 00:32:51,003 ♪ Oh, you gotta keep on feeding that fire ♪ 794 00:32:51,003 --> 00:32:55,559 ♪ Oh, you gotta keep on dancing through the night ♪ 795 00:32:55,559 --> 00:32:58,873 ♪ Hey, let it fall 796 00:32:58,873 --> 00:33:00,288 To Meredith Grey. 797 00:33:00,288 --> 00:33:01,324 Hey. Hear, hear. 798 00:33:01,324 --> 00:33:03,912 [ Cheering ] 799 00:33:03,912 --> 00:33:08,124 ♪ Hey 800 00:33:08,124 --> 00:33:09,677 Mom. Yes? 801 00:33:09,677 --> 00:33:10,919 - It was amazing. - Was it? 802 00:33:10,919 --> 00:33:12,473 Aunt Maggie was amazing. 803 00:33:12,473 --> 00:33:14,233 Of course she's amazing. 804 00:33:14,233 --> 00:33:15,752 I think I might want to change 805 00:33:15,752 --> 00:33:17,547 from neuro to cardio. 806 00:33:17,547 --> 00:33:19,238 Will you be mad? 807 00:33:19,238 --> 00:33:21,137 I will absolutely not be mad. 808 00:33:21,137 --> 00:33:22,862 [ Laughter ] 809 00:33:22,862 --> 00:33:24,519 Did you talk to Nick? I did. 810 00:33:26,073 --> 00:33:27,212 We have a plane to catch. 811 00:33:28,213 --> 00:33:29,593 Should we go? 812 00:33:29,593 --> 00:33:31,078 ♪ Chasing the light 813 00:33:34,219 --> 00:33:35,082 [ Giggles ] 814 00:33:41,571 --> 00:33:43,814 [ Indistinct conversations ] 815 00:33:43,814 --> 00:33:44,677 [ Exhales deeply ] 816 00:33:46,265 --> 00:33:47,542 Dr. Marsh. 817 00:33:48,371 --> 00:33:50,752 [ Clears throat ] Helm. 818 00:33:50,752 --> 00:33:52,099 Hey. 819 00:33:53,686 --> 00:33:56,034 What are you doing behind a bar? 820 00:33:56,034 --> 00:33:57,311 Living my best life. 821 00:33:57,311 --> 00:33:59,209 What are you doing at the bar? 822 00:34:00,452 --> 00:34:02,764 Uh, yeah, well, it was a bit of a rough day, 823 00:34:02,764 --> 00:34:04,939 so I decided to call it early. 824 00:34:04,939 --> 00:34:07,873 Actually, can I have a whiskey rocks, please? 825 00:34:07,873 --> 00:34:09,909 Thank you. I don't get it. 826 00:34:09,909 --> 00:34:12,498 Isn't Dr. Grey leaving today? 827 00:34:12,498 --> 00:34:14,535 Isn't her party, like, right now? 828 00:34:16,433 --> 00:34:17,710 Yeah. Oh, my God. 829 00:34:17,710 --> 00:34:18,884 You are such an idiot. 830 00:34:18,884 --> 00:34:20,506 [ Chuckles ] Wow. 831 00:34:22,336 --> 00:34:24,200 [ Sighs ] I don't work there anymore, 832 00:34:24,200 --> 00:34:25,718 so I'm just gonna tell you the truth 833 00:34:25,718 --> 00:34:27,065 instead of pretending to respect 834 00:34:27,065 --> 00:34:28,342 your awful decision making. 835 00:34:28,342 --> 00:34:29,998 She's Meredith Grey. 836 00:34:29,998 --> 00:34:31,862 She's impossible, and she's perfect, 837 00:34:31,862 --> 00:34:33,692 and she's brilliant, and she cares. 838 00:34:33,692 --> 00:34:36,315 And she can be mean sometimes, but only when she needs to be, 839 00:34:36,315 --> 00:34:38,110 and she can be selfish sometimes 840 00:34:38,110 --> 00:34:40,354 because she has earned that right. 841 00:34:40,354 --> 00:34:42,287 And for some stupid reason she's into men 842 00:34:42,287 --> 00:34:43,495 so she never fell in love with me, 843 00:34:43,495 --> 00:34:45,152 but she fell in love with you. 844 00:34:46,532 --> 00:34:47,775 And you're here? 845 00:34:48,741 --> 00:34:50,329 How stupid are you? 846 00:34:50,329 --> 00:35:02,134 ♪ 847 00:35:02,134 --> 00:35:04,895 [ Maggie sighs ] 848 00:35:04,895 --> 00:35:07,553 He's still going strong. 849 00:35:07,553 --> 00:35:09,555 I am in awe. 850 00:35:09,555 --> 00:35:12,731 It really is a miracle. 851 00:35:12,731 --> 00:35:15,043 Yes. Yeah. 852 00:35:15,043 --> 00:35:18,495 It is-- It's a miracle of science, Winston. 853 00:35:18,495 --> 00:35:22,016 Specifically, it's a miracle of cardiothoracic surgery. 854 00:35:22,016 --> 00:35:24,846 We did a thing that no one else has done today, 855 00:35:24,846 --> 00:35:27,228 and-- and we saved that baby's life. 856 00:35:27,228 --> 00:35:29,403 And if it worked like I think it did, 857 00:35:29,403 --> 00:35:31,336 this miracle of science is going to save 858 00:35:31,336 --> 00:35:34,477 thousands of babies' lives. [ Chuckles ] 859 00:35:34,477 --> 00:35:36,824 That has to make you see that you can't just change 860 00:35:36,824 --> 00:35:39,171 your field of study at this stage of your career. 861 00:35:41,069 --> 00:35:43,831 You told me that you didn't respect my choice-- 862 00:35:43,831 --> 00:35:45,177 you said you didn't respect me. 863 00:35:45,177 --> 00:35:46,558 - I didn't say that. - And then there was a fire. 864 00:35:46,558 --> 00:35:48,042 You know, it was a lot. 865 00:35:48,042 --> 00:35:49,354 I gave you time, and I gave you space, 866 00:35:49,354 --> 00:35:50,976 but for two weeks now, I've been waiting 867 00:35:50,976 --> 00:35:52,495 for an apology that hasn't come. 868 00:35:52,495 --> 00:35:54,566 And now you're doubling down? 869 00:35:54,566 --> 00:35:56,154 You're-- There's no apology coming 870 00:35:56,154 --> 00:35:57,396 because you meant what you said? 871 00:35:57,396 --> 00:35:59,053 I think you'll reconsider-- 872 00:35:59,053 --> 00:36:00,641 Yeah, changing my job to protect my marriage. 873 00:36:00,641 --> 00:36:01,642 It's not a job. 874 00:36:01,642 --> 00:36:03,575 It's not a job. 875 00:36:03,575 --> 00:36:05,232 It is a gift. 876 00:36:05,232 --> 00:36:08,304 Alright. 877 00:36:08,304 --> 00:36:10,858 And just like that the feeling is mutual. 878 00:36:10,858 --> 00:36:13,067 What feeling? 879 00:36:13,067 --> 00:36:15,173 You told Kwan that his strategy to disengage 880 00:36:15,173 --> 00:36:17,658 emotionally from his patients was smart. 881 00:36:17,658 --> 00:36:19,522 What feeling? 882 00:36:19,522 --> 00:36:21,075 All this time, I don't-- I don't know how I missed it. 883 00:36:21,075 --> 00:36:22,835 Winston, what feeling? 884 00:36:22,835 --> 00:36:24,734 The disrespect. 885 00:36:24,734 --> 00:36:26,218 You're cold. 886 00:36:26,218 --> 00:36:28,462 And I don't respect it. 887 00:36:28,462 --> 00:36:36,090 ♪ 888 00:36:38,057 --> 00:36:39,507 Bailey, w-w-where's Meredith? 889 00:36:39,507 --> 00:36:41,371 She's one of a kind. 890 00:36:41,371 --> 00:36:42,717 That's what I was trying to say. She's one of a kind. 891 00:36:42,717 --> 00:36:44,029 A firecracker. 892 00:36:44,029 --> 00:36:45,479 - Yeah. - Any words at all, really. 893 00:36:45,479 --> 00:36:47,032 Look, she's, uh, on her way to the airport. 894 00:36:47,032 --> 00:36:49,103 But look, there's cake if you need some. 895 00:36:49,103 --> 00:36:50,069 You look like you need some. 896 00:36:50,069 --> 00:36:52,658 ♪ 897 00:36:52,658 --> 00:36:56,524 Well, fine. More for me. 898 00:36:56,524 --> 00:36:58,664 Woman over PA: This is the final boarding call for Flight 623. 899 00:36:58,664 --> 00:37:00,079 Any remaining passengers, 900 00:37:00,079 --> 00:37:02,150 please proceed to the gate at this time. 901 00:37:02,150 --> 00:37:10,918 ♪ Hold steady 902 00:37:10,918 --> 00:37:14,715 ♪ This heaviness 903 00:37:14,715 --> 00:37:15,681 ♪ Will break 904 00:37:15,681 --> 00:37:16,820 Come on, come on, come on. 905 00:37:16,820 --> 00:37:18,719 ♪ Through the ground 906 00:37:18,719 --> 00:37:26,554 ♪ Take cover 907 00:37:26,554 --> 00:37:29,626 ♪ What's underneath 908 00:37:29,626 --> 00:37:31,490 Oh, come on. 909 00:37:31,490 --> 00:37:32,905 [ Sighs ] Oh, my God. 910 00:37:32,905 --> 00:37:35,253 ♪ Will find a way out 911 00:37:37,531 --> 00:37:38,532 Alright. 912 00:37:38,532 --> 00:37:40,292 Zola, you can sit here. 913 00:37:40,292 --> 00:37:41,397 Guys, we're gonna sit here. 914 00:37:43,019 --> 00:37:44,331 Go right in there. 915 00:37:44,331 --> 00:37:46,540 ♪ Living in the lost 916 00:37:46,540 --> 00:37:52,546 [ Sighs ] I'm never gonna make it. 917 00:37:52,546 --> 00:37:54,513 ♪ Falling through the motions like a sinking stone ♪ 918 00:37:54,513 --> 00:37:56,343 Okay. 919 00:37:56,343 --> 00:38:00,692 ♪ Living in the lost 920 00:38:00,692 --> 00:38:03,867 ♪ Seeking out the silence, but you're never alone ♪ 921 00:38:03,867 --> 00:38:08,665 ♪ Living in the lost 922 00:38:08,665 --> 00:38:12,497 Who wants to read the new [singsong voice] Tessa book? 923 00:38:12,497 --> 00:38:14,568 Oh, Zola, I know these are a little young for you, 924 00:38:14,568 --> 00:38:15,845 but this is the last one ever. 925 00:38:15,845 --> 00:38:17,674 Ellis: That's the book? 926 00:38:17,674 --> 00:38:19,435 [ Cellphone buzzes ] Yes, I got an advanced copy. 927 00:38:21,747 --> 00:38:23,093 Hold on, guys. 928 00:38:24,509 --> 00:38:26,200 Hi. We're on the plane. 929 00:38:26,200 --> 00:38:27,305 I love you. 930 00:38:29,445 --> 00:38:31,585 I fell in love with you the first day I met you. 931 00:38:31,585 --> 00:38:34,242 I fell in love with you the second day I met you. 932 00:38:34,242 --> 00:38:36,383 And I have loved you every minute of every day 933 00:38:36,383 --> 00:38:38,005 that I have known you. 934 00:38:41,422 --> 00:38:43,528 Meredith? 935 00:38:43,528 --> 00:38:45,840 Um, I... 936 00:38:45,840 --> 00:38:47,359 Meredith? 937 00:38:47,359 --> 00:38:50,189 I can't quite hear you. Meredith? 938 00:38:50,189 --> 00:38:51,674 We're about to take off, 939 00:38:51,674 --> 00:38:55,160 so I'll call you when we get settled. 940 00:38:55,160 --> 00:38:56,851 Meredith... 941 00:38:56,851 --> 00:38:58,370 Meredi-- [ Beep ] 942 00:39:00,614 --> 00:39:09,347 ♪ 943 00:39:09,347 --> 00:39:12,350 "I've flown rockets and slayed dragons, 944 00:39:12,350 --> 00:39:16,526 I've saved lives and I've had my life saved. 945 00:39:16,526 --> 00:39:19,149 I've been through broken bones and a broken home 946 00:39:19,149 --> 00:39:22,463 and the death of people I love, but I'm still here." 947 00:39:22,463 --> 00:39:24,258 [ Elevator bell dings ] 948 00:39:24,258 --> 00:39:26,467 "I never chose the safety of what was known 949 00:39:26,467 --> 00:39:29,401 when there was the possibility of more to be discovered." 950 00:39:29,401 --> 00:39:32,197 Hey. 951 00:39:32,197 --> 00:39:34,268 Could I stay at your place tonight? 952 00:39:34,268 --> 00:39:37,582 ♪ 953 00:39:37,582 --> 00:39:40,136 "I've had adventures that most people only dream about." 954 00:39:41,896 --> 00:39:43,726 ♪ Nocturnal 955 00:39:43,726 --> 00:39:45,486 "And I've had losses that I still dream about." 956 00:39:45,486 --> 00:39:49,179 ♪ When the days and the nights blend into one ♪ 957 00:39:51,078 --> 00:39:52,562 "And if there's one thing I've learned 958 00:39:52,562 --> 00:39:56,359 in all my adventures, it's that there's no such thing 959 00:39:56,359 --> 00:39:59,397 as a life lived happily ever after. 960 00:39:59,397 --> 00:40:03,470 Unless the happily means simply that we're still alive. 961 00:40:03,470 --> 00:40:06,162 That the sun is rising on another day. 962 00:40:06,162 --> 00:40:07,474 Because with every sunrise 963 00:40:07,474 --> 00:40:09,476 comes the possibility of happiness 964 00:40:09,476 --> 00:40:12,479 and also the possibility of heartache." 965 00:40:12,479 --> 00:40:15,067 [ Chuckles ] Uh, what are you doing here? 966 00:40:15,067 --> 00:40:16,241 Grey gave me a key. 967 00:40:16,241 --> 00:40:18,139 She said there's a hole in the attic, 968 00:40:18,139 --> 00:40:21,453 but if I don't mind overseeing the repairs, I can stay here. 969 00:40:21,453 --> 00:40:23,490 "And sometimes it's all rolled up together." 970 00:40:23,490 --> 00:40:26,113 Yeah, my Aunt Amelia told me the same thing. 971 00:40:27,701 --> 00:40:29,461 [ Chuckles ] 972 00:40:29,461 --> 00:40:31,498 "I came to understand as a very young child 973 00:40:31,498 --> 00:40:33,914 that when the imagination is limitless, 974 00:40:33,914 --> 00:40:35,985 life's possibilities are endless." 975 00:40:35,985 --> 00:40:39,091 When I got kicked out of my residency, 976 00:40:39,091 --> 00:40:40,852 it also ended my relationship. 977 00:40:40,852 --> 00:40:44,096 Had my dream job, was planning my dream life, 978 00:40:44,096 --> 00:40:45,650 and then I didn't, and I wasn't. 979 00:40:45,650 --> 00:40:47,306 "But I learned that the hard way." 980 00:40:47,306 --> 00:40:49,861 It's not that I don't feel things. 981 00:40:49,861 --> 00:40:51,034 It's that I don't want to put 982 00:40:51,034 --> 00:40:56,074 you through any kind of rebound. 983 00:40:56,074 --> 00:40:57,558 ♪ Keep reaching and seeing if I can just break my way out ♪ 984 00:40:57,558 --> 00:40:59,077 [ Chuckles ] 985 00:40:59,077 --> 00:41:01,148 I-I mean, 986 00:41:01,148 --> 00:41:03,357 I could be down for a rebound. 987 00:41:03,357 --> 00:41:05,221 [ Chuckles ] Did you really just say that? 988 00:41:05,221 --> 00:41:07,223 [ Both chuckle ] 989 00:41:07,223 --> 00:41:08,914 Um, okay, w-what I'm saying is, 990 00:41:08,914 --> 00:41:10,571 you know, as long as we call it what it is, 991 00:41:10,571 --> 00:41:13,194 then no harm, no foul, right? 992 00:41:13,194 --> 00:41:15,093 Apparently we live together 993 00:41:15,093 --> 00:41:17,336 so that's a really, uh... 994 00:41:17,336 --> 00:41:19,166 [ Chuckles ] 995 00:41:19,166 --> 00:41:21,375 ...terrible idea. 996 00:41:21,375 --> 00:41:22,549 Yeah. 997 00:41:22,549 --> 00:41:24,861 ♪ Oh 998 00:41:24,861 --> 00:41:26,725 [ Exhales deeply ] 999 00:41:28,175 --> 00:41:29,141 [ Chuckles ] 1000 00:41:29,141 --> 00:41:31,558 ♪ Nocturnal 1001 00:41:31,558 --> 00:41:33,525 "I learned it through yearning and frustration 1002 00:41:33,525 --> 00:41:35,423 and ache and longing 1003 00:41:35,423 --> 00:41:37,218 and sometimes desperation for a life different 1004 00:41:37,218 --> 00:41:38,565 than the one I was living." 1005 00:41:38,565 --> 00:41:42,016 ♪ Turned purple 1006 00:41:42,016 --> 00:41:46,262 ♪ All the air that I had gone from my lungs ♪ 1007 00:41:47,608 --> 00:41:51,957 ♪ Eyes are closing, head spinning round ♪ 1008 00:41:51,957 --> 00:41:53,890 "I learned to stretch my imagination 1009 00:41:53,890 --> 00:41:55,616 and spread my wings, 1010 00:41:55,616 --> 00:41:58,550 and to allow for all the options life had to offer." 1011 00:41:58,550 --> 00:42:05,039 ♪ Oh 1012 00:42:05,039 --> 00:42:08,042 "Not only the ones I could see with my eyes. 1013 00:42:08,042 --> 00:42:10,873 I stretch for the ones I could feel with my heart." 1014 00:42:13,220 --> 00:42:18,328 ♪ Lost or found, who am I now? ♪ 1015 00:42:18,328 --> 00:42:20,676 Wow. 1016 00:42:20,676 --> 00:42:22,850 This is amazing. 1017 00:42:22,850 --> 00:42:26,613 ♪ Before I hit the ground 1018 00:42:26,613 --> 00:42:29,201 [ Door closes ]♪ Lost or found 1019 00:42:29,201 --> 00:42:31,065 ♪ Who am I now? 1020 00:42:31,065 --> 00:42:33,689 What are you doing here? 1021 00:42:33,689 --> 00:42:35,622 Uh, Dr. Pierce gave me a key. 1022 00:42:35,622 --> 00:42:37,347 She said I could stay 1023 00:42:37,347 --> 00:42:39,349 if I fix up the hole in the attic. 1024 00:42:41,731 --> 00:42:43,491 Same. Same. 1025 00:42:43,491 --> 00:42:45,666 "As long as the sun rises on your life..." 1026 00:42:45,666 --> 00:42:48,807 Then I guess we should have brought sleeping bags. 1027 00:42:48,807 --> 00:42:51,638 "...there will be new dragons to slay." 1028 00:42:51,638 --> 00:42:53,018 So, who wants pizza? 1029 00:42:53,018 --> 00:42:55,055 [ Chuckles ] 1030 00:42:55,055 --> 00:42:58,472 "So the end of my story is not any kind of ever after. 1031 00:42:58,472 --> 00:43:00,232 Because I'm still alive. 1032 00:43:00,232 --> 00:43:02,234 I'm still here. 1033 00:43:02,234 --> 00:43:05,168 And the sun still rises on my life." 1034 00:43:05,168 --> 00:43:08,827 ♪ Break my way out 1035 00:43:08,827 --> 00:43:13,521 ♪ Oh 1036 00:43:13,521 --> 00:43:15,662 [ Sighs ] 1037 00:43:15,662 --> 00:43:23,393 ♪ 1038 00:43:28,778 --> 00:43:31,505 Captions by VITAC-- 1039 00:43:31,505 --> 00:43:56,116 ♪