1 00:00:55,220 --> 00:00:56,915 Onward, Ohauncey! 2 00:00:57,055 --> 00:00:59,649 To the highest room of the tallest tower... 3 00:00:59,791 --> 00:01:04,888 ...where my princess awaits rescue from her handsome Prince Oharming! 4 00:01:16,241 --> 00:01:20,007 This is worse than " Love Letters" . I hate dinner theater! 5 00:01:20,145 --> 00:01:21,908 Me, too. 6 00:01:23,248 --> 00:01:25,239 Whoa there, Ohauncey! 7 00:01:26,651 --> 00:01:30,109 Hark! The brave Prince Oharming approacheth. 8 00:01:30,255 --> 00:01:34,624 Fear not, fair maiden. I shall slay the monster that guards you... 9 00:01:34,760 --> 00:01:37,695 ...then take my place as rightful king. 10 00:01:37,829 --> 00:01:39,421 What did she say? 11 00:01:43,201 --> 00:01:44,600 It's Shrek! 12 00:01:44,870 --> 00:01:46,531 Whoo, Shrek, yeah! 13 00:01:48,774 --> 00:01:50,867 Prepare, foul beast... 14 00:01:51,009 --> 00:01:55,673 ...to enter into a world of pain with which you are not familiar! 15 00:01:55,814 --> 00:01:58,374 Happy birthday to thee Happy birthday to thee 16 00:01:58,517 --> 00:01:59,779 Do you mind? 17 00:02:00,118 --> 00:02:03,281 Do you mind? Boring! 18 00:02:07,793 --> 00:02:10,125 Prepare, foul beast... 19 00:02:19,137 --> 00:02:21,833 Someday you'll be sorry. 20 00:02:21,973 --> 00:02:24,134 We already are! 21 00:02:49,267 --> 00:02:50,564 Mommy... 22 00:02:54,506 --> 00:02:57,998 You're right. I can't let this happen. 23 00:02:58,844 --> 00:03:00,175 I can't ! 24 00:03:01,346 --> 00:03:05,112 I am the rightful King of Far Far Away. 25 00:03:05,250 --> 00:03:07,343 And I promise you this, Mother... 26 00:03:07,686 --> 00:03:10,416 ...I will restore dignity to my throne. 27 00:03:15,026 --> 00:03:16,118 And this time, 28 00:03:16,261 --> 00:03:20,425 no one will stand in my way. 29 00:03:37,382 --> 00:03:39,043 Good morning. 30 00:03:40,051 --> 00:03:41,712 Good morning. 31 00:03:43,388 --> 00:03:44,412 Morning breath. 32 00:03:44,556 --> 00:03:47,719 I know. Isn't it wonderful? 33 00:03:48,393 --> 00:03:50,224 Good morning, good morning 34 00:03:50,896 --> 00:03:53,296 The sun is shining through 35 00:03:53,431 --> 00:03:55,626 Good morning, good morning To you 36 00:03:55,767 --> 00:03:57,894 And you! And you! 37 00:04:01,806 --> 00:04:03,501 They grow up so fast. 38 00:04:03,642 --> 00:04:05,735 Not fast enough. 39 00:04:07,812 --> 00:04:10,508 You'll be filling in for the King and Queen. 40 00:04:10,649 --> 00:04:13,846 Several functions require your attendance, sir. 41 00:04:13,985 --> 00:04:17,284 Great! Let's get started. 42 00:04:17,422 --> 00:04:20,255 Oome on, lazybones. Time to get moving! 43 00:04:21,092 --> 00:04:23,356 You need to get a pair ofjammies. 44 00:04:30,802 --> 00:04:34,033 I got some sleep and I needed it 45 00:04:34,172 --> 00:04:36,902 Not a lot, just a little bit 46 00:04:37,042 --> 00:04:40,136 Someone's always trying to keep me from it 47 00:04:40,278 --> 00:04:43,111 It's a crying shame 48 00:04:43,782 --> 00:04:46,148 It's a royal pain in the neck 49 00:04:46,284 --> 00:04:47,945 I knight thee. 50 00:05:09,808 --> 00:05:12,936 If you're filling in for a king, you should look like one. 51 00:05:13,078 --> 00:05:16,138 Oan somebody come in and work on Shrek? 52 00:05:17,983 --> 00:05:19,473 I will see what I can do. 53 00:05:40,672 --> 00:05:42,333 Yeah, wow. 54 00:05:43,174 --> 00:05:45,665 Is this really necessary? 55 00:05:46,444 --> 00:05:48,105 Quite necessary, Fiona. 56 00:05:48,246 --> 00:05:51,044 - I'm Shrek, you twit. - Whatever. 57 00:05:51,182 --> 00:05:54,879 This isn't a rehearsal, peoples. Let's see some hustle! 58 00:05:55,020 --> 00:05:56,954 Smiles, everyone! Smiles! 59 00:05:57,088 --> 00:06:00,546 I don't know how much longer I can keep this up. 60 00:06:00,692 --> 00:06:03,627 I'm sorry, but can you just try to grin and bear it? 61 00:06:03,762 --> 00:06:05,787 It's just until Dad gets better. 62 00:06:07,866 --> 00:06:09,197 Shrek? 63 00:06:10,535 --> 00:06:12,127 You look handsome. 64 00:06:12,270 --> 00:06:14,204 Oome here, you. 65 00:06:28,553 --> 00:06:33,217 My butt is itching up a storm and I can't reach it in this monkey suit. 66 00:06:34,059 --> 00:06:36,994 Hey, you! Oome here. What's your name? 67 00:06:37,128 --> 00:06:39,494 Fiddlesworth, sir. 68 00:06:39,631 --> 00:06:40,723 Perfect. 69 00:06:43,401 --> 00:06:45,767 Ladies and gentlemen... 70 00:06:45,904 --> 00:06:49,067 ...Princess Fiona and Sir Shrek! 71 00:06:53,411 --> 00:06:55,174 Ahh! You've got it. 72 00:06:55,313 --> 00:06:56,837 A little to the left. 73 00:06:58,083 --> 00:07:00,278 That's it! That's good. 74 00:07:00,418 --> 00:07:03,512 Oh, yeah! Scratch that thing! You're on it. 75 00:07:03,655 --> 00:07:05,088 Shrek! 76 00:07:09,994 --> 00:07:11,120 My eye! 77 00:07:11,262 --> 00:07:12,422 What are you doing? 78 00:07:19,003 --> 00:07:19,992 Fiona! 79 00:07:23,108 --> 00:07:26,339 - Are you okay? - Yeah. I'm fine. 80 00:07:29,948 --> 00:07:32,280 Shrimp! My favorite! 81 00:07:42,794 --> 00:07:45,490 - That's it! We're leaving! - Oalm down. 82 00:07:45,630 --> 00:07:50,567 Oalm down? Who do you think we're kidding? I am an ogre. 83 00:07:50,702 --> 00:07:54,297 I'm not cut out for this, Fiona, and I never will be. 84 00:07:58,376 --> 00:07:59,741 I think that went well. 85 00:07:59,878 --> 00:08:01,106 Donkey! 86 00:08:01,246 --> 00:08:02,975 Oome on, Shrek! 87 00:08:03,481 --> 00:08:06,712 Some people just don't understand boundaries. 88 00:08:15,994 --> 00:08:20,590 Just think. A couple more days and we'll be back home... 89 00:08:20,732 --> 00:08:24,031 ...in our vermin-filled shack strewn with fungus... 90 00:08:24,169 --> 00:08:27,070 ...and filled with the stench of mud and neglect. 91 00:08:27,205 --> 00:08:29,833 You had me at "vermin-filled" . 92 00:08:30,675 --> 00:08:35,510 And, um... maybe even the pitter-patter of little feet on the floor. 93 00:08:36,014 --> 00:08:38,710 That's right, the swamp rats will be spawning. 94 00:08:38,850 --> 00:08:40,215 Uh, no. 95 00:08:40,351 --> 00:08:44,048 What I'm thinking of is a little bigger than a swamp rat. 96 00:08:44,189 --> 00:08:45,213 Donkey? 97 00:08:45,356 --> 00:08:49,019 No, Shrek. What if, theoretically... 98 00:08:50,295 --> 00:08:52,422 ...they were little ogre feet? 99 00:08:58,870 --> 00:09:02,237 Honey, let's be rational about this. 100 00:09:02,373 --> 00:09:04,739 Have you seen a baby lately? 101 00:09:04,876 --> 00:09:08,073 They just eat and poop, and they cry... 102 00:09:08,213 --> 00:09:11,580 ...then they cry when they poop and poop when they cry. 103 00:09:11,716 --> 00:09:14,514 Now, imagine an ogre baby. 104 00:09:14,652 --> 00:09:18,452 They extra-cry and they extra-poop. 105 00:09:18,590 --> 00:09:22,185 Shrek, don't you ever think about having a family? 106 00:09:22,327 --> 00:09:25,888 Right now, you're my family. 107 00:09:29,901 --> 00:09:32,062 Somebody better be dying. 108 00:09:34,005 --> 00:09:36,235 I'm dying. 109 00:09:38,576 --> 00:09:39,736 Harold? 110 00:09:41,913 --> 00:09:45,007 Don't forget to pay the gardener, Lillian. 111 00:09:45,149 --> 00:09:47,083 Of course, darling. 112 00:09:48,820 --> 00:09:49,878 Fiona. 113 00:09:50,021 --> 00:09:51,545 Yes, Daddy? 114 00:09:51,689 --> 00:09:54,419 I know I made many mistakes with you. 115 00:09:55,426 --> 00:09:56,893 It's okay. 116 00:09:57,028 --> 00:09:59,155 But your love for Shrek has... 117 00:10:00,098 --> 00:10:01,497 ...taught me much. 118 00:10:03,635 --> 00:10:05,626 My dear boy... 119 00:10:05,770 --> 00:10:09,035 ...I am proud to call you my son. 120 00:10:09,173 --> 00:10:12,301 And I'm proud to call you my frog... 121 00:10:12,443 --> 00:10:14,877 ...King dad-in-law. 122 00:10:15,013 --> 00:10:20,610 Now there is a matter of business to attend to. 123 00:10:30,962 --> 00:10:33,954 The Frog King... is dead. 124 00:10:42,140 --> 00:10:44,108 Put your hat back on, fool. 125 00:10:44,242 --> 00:10:45,834 Shrek... 126 00:10:45,977 --> 00:10:47,638 ...please come hither. 127 00:10:51,482 --> 00:10:52,847 Yeah, Dad? 128 00:10:52,984 --> 00:10:56,147 This kingdom needs a new king. 129 00:10:57,488 --> 00:11:02,152 You and Fiona are next in line for the throne. 130 00:11:03,828 --> 00:11:08,026 Next in line. You see, Dad, that's why people love you. 131 00:11:08,166 --> 00:11:11,499 Even on your deathbed, you're still making jokes. 132 00:11:15,173 --> 00:11:18,870 Oome on, Dad. An ogre as king? 133 00:11:19,010 --> 00:11:21,535 That's not such a good idea. 134 00:11:21,679 --> 00:11:24,978 There must be somebody else. Anybody! 135 00:11:25,116 --> 00:11:30,315 Aside from you, there is only one remaining heir. 136 00:11:30,455 --> 00:11:33,652 Really? Who is he, Dad? 137 00:11:33,791 --> 00:11:35,850 His name is... 138 00:11:37,228 --> 00:11:38,286 ...is... 139 00:11:38,429 --> 00:11:40,056 What's his name? 140 00:11:40,198 --> 00:11:41,790 ...is... 141 00:11:43,701 --> 00:11:44,793 Daddy! 142 00:12:02,053 --> 00:12:04,021 His name is Arthur. 143 00:12:04,155 --> 00:12:05,554 Arthur? 144 00:12:09,894 --> 00:12:13,091 I know you'll do... 145 00:12:13,231 --> 00:12:15,893 ...what's right. 146 00:12:18,936 --> 00:12:20,267 Harold? 147 00:12:20,405 --> 00:12:21,963 Dad? Dad! 148 00:12:23,408 --> 00:12:24,636 Dad? 149 00:12:25,243 --> 00:12:26,835 Do your thing, man. 150 00:12:56,774 --> 00:13:00,642 When you were young and your heart 151 00:13:00,778 --> 00:13:02,939 Was an open book 152 00:13:04,949 --> 00:13:09,079 y ou used to say live and let live 153 00:13:09,220 --> 00:13:12,553 y ou know you did, you know you did y ou know you did 154 00:13:13,357 --> 00:13:18,420 But if this ever changing world In which we live in 155 00:13:19,297 --> 00:13:23,461 Makes you give in and cry 156 00:13:25,970 --> 00:13:28,131 Say live and let die 157 00:13:31,576 --> 00:13:33,237 Live and let die 158 00:14:09,747 --> 00:14:13,513 Hey, lady y ou, lady 159 00:14:14,519 --> 00:14:16,680 Cursing at your life 160 00:14:17,355 --> 00:14:20,017 y ou're a discontented mother 161 00:14:21,692 --> 00:14:24,354 And a regimented wife 162 00:14:50,054 --> 00:14:53,217 What does a prince have to do to get a drink here? 163 00:14:54,559 --> 00:14:56,254 Ah, Mabel! 164 00:14:56,394 --> 00:15:00,797 Why they call you an ugly stepsister, I'll never know. 165 00:15:01,899 --> 00:15:04,993 Where's Doris? Taking the night off? 166 00:15:05,136 --> 00:15:08,902 She's not welcome here, and neither are you. 167 00:15:10,575 --> 00:15:12,600 What do you want, Oharming? 168 00:15:12,743 --> 00:15:16,804 Not much. Just a chance at redemption. 169 00:15:18,416 --> 00:15:19,883 And a Fuzzy Navel. 170 00:15:20,017 --> 00:15:23,077 And Fuzzy Navels for all my friends! 171 00:15:27,525 --> 00:15:29,152 We're not your friends. 172 00:15:31,362 --> 00:15:33,489 You don't belong here. 173 00:15:33,631 --> 00:15:37,795 You're absolutely right, but, I mean, do any of us? 174 00:15:37,935 --> 00:15:39,562 Do a number on his face. 175 00:15:39,704 --> 00:15:44,300 Wait, wait, wait! We are more alike than you think. 176 00:15:44,442 --> 00:15:48,344 Wicked Witch! The Seven Dwarfs saved Snow White, and what happened? 177 00:15:48,479 --> 00:15:49,571 Oh, what's it to you? 178 00:15:49,714 --> 00:15:51,978 They left you the unfairest of them all. 179 00:15:52,116 --> 00:15:56,644 Now here you are, hustling pool to get your next meal. 180 00:15:56,787 --> 00:15:58,618 How does that feel? 181 00:16:04,095 --> 00:16:05,687 Pretty unfair. 182 00:16:05,830 --> 00:16:07,229 And you! 183 00:16:07,365 --> 00:16:11,995 Your star puppet abandons the show to go and find his father. 184 00:16:13,504 --> 00:16:15,597 I hate that little wooden puppet. 185 00:16:15,740 --> 00:16:17,708 And Hook. 186 00:16:17,842 --> 00:16:19,434 Need I say more? 187 00:16:23,147 --> 00:16:25,911 - And you, Frumpypigskin! - Rumpelstiltskin. 188 00:16:26,050 --> 00:16:28,678 Where's that firstborn you were promised? 189 00:16:31,088 --> 00:16:34,990 Mabel. Remember how you couldn't get your little fat foot... 190 00:16:35,126 --> 00:16:37,026 ...into that tiny glass slipper? 191 00:16:39,697 --> 00:16:43,224 Oinderella is in Far Far Away right now... 192 00:16:43,367 --> 00:16:48,395 ...eating bonbons, cavorting with every last fairy tale creature... 193 00:16:48,539 --> 00:16:51,007 ...that has ever done you wrong! 194 00:16:51,142 --> 00:16:56,079 Once upon a time, someone decided that we were the losers. 195 00:16:56,213 --> 00:16:59,080 But there are two sides to every story... 196 00:16:59,250 --> 00:17:01,775 ...and our side has not been told! 197 00:17:01,919 --> 00:17:06,788 So who will join me? Who wants to come out on top for once? 198 00:17:06,924 --> 00:17:08,585 Who wants their... 199 00:17:08,726 --> 00:17:11,889 ..." happily ever after" ? 200 00:17:29,080 --> 00:17:30,741 This way, gents. 201 00:17:42,093 --> 00:17:47,121 It's out of my hands, senorita. The winds of fate have blown on my destiny. 202 00:17:47,264 --> 00:17:51,064 But I will never forget you. You are the love of my life. 203 00:17:51,202 --> 00:17:53,636 As are you. 204 00:17:53,771 --> 00:17:56,137 And, uh, you. 205 00:17:56,273 --> 00:17:59,436 I don't know you, but I'd like to. 206 00:18:00,611 --> 00:18:01,942 I got to go! 207 00:18:03,347 --> 00:18:05,042 I don't wanna leave you either. 208 00:18:05,182 --> 00:18:08,015 But you know how Shrek is. The dude's lost without me. 209 00:18:08,953 --> 00:18:12,286 But don't worry. I'll send you airmail kisses every day! 210 00:18:13,624 --> 00:18:14,989 Be strong, babies. 211 00:18:15,126 --> 00:18:17,560 Ooco, Peanut, listen to your mama. 212 00:18:17,695 --> 00:18:21,688 Bananas, no roasting marshmallows on your sister's head. 213 00:18:23,701 --> 00:18:25,328 That's my special boy! 214 00:18:25,469 --> 00:18:28,563 Oome here, all of you! Give your daddy a big hug! 215 00:18:35,146 --> 00:18:36,477 Shrek? 216 00:18:37,481 --> 00:18:41,781 Maybe you should just stay and be King. 217 00:18:41,919 --> 00:18:45,446 Oome on. There's no way I could run a kingdom. 218 00:18:45,589 --> 00:18:48,581 That's why your cousin Arthur is a perfect choice. 219 00:18:48,726 --> 00:18:51,251 It's not that. You see... 220 00:18:51,395 --> 00:18:55,855 And if he gives me trouble, I always have persuasion and reason. 221 00:18:56,000 --> 00:18:59,333 Here's persuasion... and here's reason. 222 00:19:01,739 --> 00:19:03,138 Fiona... 223 00:19:03,274 --> 00:19:06,539 ...soon it's just going to be you, me... 224 00:19:06,677 --> 00:19:08,338 ...and our swamp. 225 00:19:10,181 --> 00:19:12,672 It's not going to be just you and me. 226 00:19:13,951 --> 00:19:15,851 All aboard! 227 00:19:17,021 --> 00:19:19,854 It will be. I promise. 228 00:19:21,025 --> 00:19:22,515 I love you. 229 00:19:29,133 --> 00:19:30,794 That's lovely. 230 00:19:30,935 --> 00:19:32,527 Bye-bye, babies! 231 00:19:40,110 --> 00:19:41,304 Shrek! 232 00:19:42,546 --> 00:19:44,741 - Wait! - What is it? 233 00:19:44,882 --> 00:19:46,372 I'm ... I'm ... 234 00:19:50,387 --> 00:19:52,252 I love you, too, honey! 235 00:19:52,389 --> 00:19:55,222 No! I said I'm ... 236 00:19:58,229 --> 00:19:59,662 You're what? 237 00:19:59,797 --> 00:20:02,231 I said I'm pregnant! 238 00:20:06,403 --> 00:20:07,870 What was that? 239 00:20:08,005 --> 00:20:11,065 You're going to be a father! 240 00:20:12,910 --> 00:20:14,707 That's great! 241 00:20:14,845 --> 00:20:18,110 Really? I'm glad you think so! 242 00:20:18,249 --> 00:20:19,648 I love you! 243 00:20:19,783 --> 00:20:21,774 Yeah! 244 00:20:21,919 --> 00:20:24,251 Me, too! You! 245 00:20:28,125 --> 00:20:31,617 I'm going to be an uncle! I'm going to be an uncle! 246 00:20:31,762 --> 00:20:34,822 And you, my friend, are royally... 247 00:21:13,537 --> 00:21:14,526 Home. 248 00:21:26,817 --> 00:21:28,148 Shrek! 249 00:21:30,487 --> 00:21:31,818 Fiona! 250 00:21:35,826 --> 00:21:37,157 Fiona? 251 00:21:56,380 --> 00:21:57,779 Oh, no. 252 00:22:00,951 --> 00:22:03,852 Better out than in, I always say. 253 00:22:13,530 --> 00:22:14,861 No, no, no! 254 00:22:17,034 --> 00:22:19,594 It's okay. It's gonna be all right. 255 00:22:24,875 --> 00:22:27,036 Stop! Hey, wait! 256 00:23:16,427 --> 00:23:17,951 Donkey. Donkey! 257 00:23:18,095 --> 00:23:19,323 Wake up! 258 00:23:21,765 --> 00:23:23,096 Dada! 259 00:23:25,536 --> 00:23:27,527 Shrek! Are you okay? 260 00:23:29,273 --> 00:23:34,802 I can't believe I'm going to be a father. How did this happen? 261 00:23:34,945 --> 00:23:39,143 Allow me to explain. When a man has feelings for a woman... 262 00:23:39,283 --> 00:23:41,808 ...a powerful urge sweeps over him. 263 00:23:41,952 --> 00:23:44,443 I know how it happened. 264 00:23:45,289 --> 00:23:47,348 I just can't believe it. 265 00:23:50,127 --> 00:23:51,958 How does it happen? 266 00:23:58,969 --> 00:24:04,236 And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon 267 00:24:04,374 --> 00:24:07,002 Little Boy Blue and the Man in the Moon 268 00:24:07,144 --> 00:24:09,738 When you coming home, son? I don't know when 269 00:24:09,880 --> 00:24:12,178 But we'll get together then, Dad. 270 00:24:12,316 --> 00:24:14,307 Donkey! Oan you just cut to the part 271 00:24:14,451 --> 00:24:16,976 where you're supposed to make me feel better? 272 00:24:17,721 --> 00:24:20,246 You know I love Fiona, boss. Right? 273 00:24:20,390 --> 00:24:24,451 What I am talking about is you, me, my cousin's boat... 274 00:24:24,595 --> 00:24:30,192 ...an ice cold pitcher of mojitos and two weeks of nothing but fishing. 275 00:24:30,334 --> 00:24:32,199 Don't listen to him! 276 00:24:32,336 --> 00:24:35,032 Having a baby isn't going to ruin your life. 277 00:24:35,172 --> 00:24:39,700 It's not my life I'm worried about ruining, it's the kid's . 278 00:24:39,843 --> 00:24:44,143 When have you ever heard the phrase "as sweet as an ogre" ... 279 00:24:44,281 --> 00:24:46,715 ...or " as nurturing as an ogre" ... 280 00:24:46,850 --> 00:24:51,219 ...or "You'll love my dad. He's a real ogre." 281 00:24:51,355 --> 00:24:53,118 Okay. I get it. 282 00:24:53,257 --> 00:24:56,715 It's not going to be easy. But you got us to help you. 283 00:24:56,860 --> 00:24:58,555 That's true. 284 00:24:58,695 --> 00:25:00,162 I'm doomed. 285 00:25:00,297 --> 00:25:01,958 You'll be fine. 286 00:25:02,866 --> 00:25:04,766 You're finished. 287 00:25:07,037 --> 00:25:09,699 Uh, with yourjourney. 288 00:25:17,881 --> 00:25:22,318 "Wor-ces-ters-shiree" ? Now that sounds fancy! 289 00:25:22,452 --> 00:25:23,783 It's Worcestershire. 290 00:25:23,921 --> 00:25:25,752 Like the sauce? 291 00:25:25,889 --> 00:25:27,220 It's spicy! 292 00:25:31,061 --> 00:25:32,892 They must be expecting us. 293 00:25:38,802 --> 00:25:41,600 What in the shista-shire kind of place is this? 294 00:25:41,738 --> 00:25:46,937 Well, my stomach aches and my palms just got sweaty. Must be a high school. 295 00:25:47,077 --> 00:25:48,237 High school? 296 00:25:48,378 --> 00:25:49,936 Ready? Okay! 297 00:25:50,080 --> 00:25:52,514 Wherefore art thou headed, to the top? 298 00:25:52,649 --> 00:25:56,608 Yeah, we think so, we think so! And dost thou thinkest thine can be stopped? 299 00:25:56,753 --> 00:25:59,221 Nay, we thinkst not, we thinkst not! 300 00:26:04,494 --> 00:26:08,487 All right, Mr. Percival, ease up on the reins. 301 00:26:11,835 --> 00:26:15,532 For lo, bro, don't burn all my frankincense and myrrh. 302 00:26:15,672 --> 00:26:19,164 I'm feeling nauseous from memories of wedgies and swirlies! 303 00:26:19,309 --> 00:26:23,973 How did you receive wedgies when you are clearly not the wearer of underpants? 304 00:26:24,114 --> 00:26:27,015 Let's just say some things are better left unsaid. 305 00:26:27,150 --> 00:26:31,211 So I was all like, " I'd rather get the black plague than go out with you." 306 00:26:31,355 --> 00:26:33,687 - Oh, totally. - Pardon me. 307 00:26:33,824 --> 00:26:36,622 - Totally ew-eth. - Yeah, totally. 308 00:26:38,228 --> 00:26:40,822 I just altered my character level to +3 superb-ability. 309 00:26:40,964 --> 00:26:43,524 Hi. We're looking for someone named... 310 00:26:43,667 --> 00:26:48,195 Who rolled a +9 dork spell and summoned the beast and his quadruped? 311 00:26:50,040 --> 00:26:54,534 I know you're busy not fitting in, but can you tell me where I can find Arthur? 312 00:26:54,678 --> 00:26:55,975 He's over there. 313 00:27:16,166 --> 00:27:20,569 There is no sweeter taste on thy tongue than victory! 314 00:27:23,006 --> 00:27:25,873 Strong, handsome, face of a leader. 315 00:27:26,009 --> 00:27:29,342 Does Arthur look like a king or what? 316 00:27:30,514 --> 00:27:31,845 Sorry. 317 00:27:32,582 --> 00:27:35,210 Did you say you were looking for Arthur? 318 00:27:35,352 --> 00:27:37,786 That information is on a need-to-know basis. 319 00:27:37,921 --> 00:27:39,616 It's top secret! 320 00:27:39,756 --> 00:27:43,351 Now, gentlemen, let's away. To the showers! 321 00:27:45,862 --> 00:27:47,489 Greetings, Your Majesty. 322 00:27:47,631 --> 00:27:49,189 This is your lucky day. 323 00:27:50,033 --> 00:27:52,126 What are you supposed to be? 324 00:27:52,269 --> 00:27:55,534 Some kind of giant mutant leprechaun or something? 325 00:27:56,540 --> 00:28:00,032 Giant mutant... You made a funny. 326 00:28:00,544 --> 00:28:02,478 Unhand me, monster! 327 00:28:02,612 --> 00:28:04,580 Stop squirming, Arthur. 328 00:28:04,715 --> 00:28:07,047 I'm not Arthur. 329 00:28:09,052 --> 00:28:11,577 I am Lancelot. 330 00:28:11,722 --> 00:28:14,384 That dork over there is Arthur. 331 00:28:20,464 --> 00:28:22,659 This is, like, totally embarrassing... 332 00:28:22,799 --> 00:28:25,393 ...but Tiffany thinkest thou vex her so soothly. 333 00:28:25,535 --> 00:28:28,936 She thought perchance thou would ask her to the Homecoming Dance. 334 00:28:29,072 --> 00:28:30,164 Excuse me? 335 00:28:30,307 --> 00:28:34,243 Like, whatever. She's into college guys and mythical creatures. 336 00:28:37,681 --> 00:28:39,774 Oh, Arthur... 337 00:28:39,916 --> 00:28:43,613 ...come out, come out, wherever you are! 338 00:28:45,655 --> 00:28:48,283 You better run, you little punk no-goodniks! 339 00:28:48,425 --> 00:28:51,826 The days of Donkey Dumpy Drawers are over! 340 00:28:57,934 --> 00:28:59,265 Hold it. 341 00:28:59,936 --> 00:29:01,995 We're here for the mascot contest. 342 00:29:06,676 --> 00:29:09,873 We're here for the mascot contest, too. 343 00:29:10,013 --> 00:29:12,538 This is a costume? 344 00:29:12,682 --> 00:29:14,673 Worked on it all night long. 345 00:29:16,019 --> 00:29:17,816 Looks pretty real to me. 346 00:29:17,954 --> 00:29:20,354 If he were real, could I do this? 347 00:29:22,025 --> 00:29:23,686 Or this? 348 00:29:24,961 --> 00:29:29,830 If it were real, that would have been agonizingly painful. 349 00:29:29,966 --> 00:29:33,163 - Now watch this! - That's quite enough, boys. 350 00:29:33,303 --> 00:29:37,103 Thank you to Professor Primbottom and his lecture... 351 00:29:37,240 --> 00:29:38,639 ...on "just say nay" . 352 00:29:39,576 --> 00:29:43,842 And now, without further ado, let's give a warm Worcestershire hoozah... 353 00:29:43,980 --> 00:29:47,472 ...to the winner of our mascot contest, the... 354 00:29:48,652 --> 00:29:49,641 ...ogre? 355 00:29:51,721 --> 00:29:54,019 That's right. I'm the new mascot. 356 00:29:54,157 --> 00:29:57,786 So let's really try and beat the other guys at... 357 00:29:57,928 --> 00:30:01,056 ...whatever it is they're doing! 358 00:30:04,601 --> 00:30:07,593 This is all a bit unorthodox... 359 00:30:07,737 --> 00:30:11,400 Where can I find Arthur Pendragon? 360 00:30:13,677 --> 00:30:15,167 Hey, wait... 361 00:30:19,282 --> 00:30:20,909 Olassic. 362 00:30:21,051 --> 00:30:22,746 You should be ashamed of yourself! 363 00:30:22,886 --> 00:30:25,286 I didn't do it. They did. 364 00:30:30,093 --> 00:30:31,822 Please don't eat me. 365 00:30:31,962 --> 00:30:34,294 Eat him! Eat him! Eat him! 366 00:30:35,298 --> 00:30:37,960 I'm not here to eat him! 367 00:30:39,436 --> 00:30:42,064 Time to pack up your toothbrush and jammies. 368 00:30:42,205 --> 00:30:44,435 You're the new King of Far Far Away. 369 00:30:44,574 --> 00:30:46,235 What? 370 00:30:47,777 --> 00:30:51,975 Artie a king? More like the Mayor of Loserville! 371 00:30:56,720 --> 00:30:57,709 Burn. 372 00:31:01,324 --> 00:31:02,450 Is this for real? 373 00:31:02,592 --> 00:31:06,995 Absolutely. Olean out your locker, kid. You have a kingdom to run. 374 00:31:07,130 --> 00:31:09,792 So, wait...l'm really the only heir? 375 00:31:11,134 --> 00:31:12,465 The one and only. 376 00:31:13,803 --> 00:31:15,464 Give me a second. 377 00:31:17,807 --> 00:31:19,468 My good people... 378 00:31:19,609 --> 00:31:22,339 ...there's a lesson here for all of us. 379 00:31:22,479 --> 00:31:26,779 Next time you're about to dunk a kid's head in a chamber pot, stop and think, 380 00:31:26,917 --> 00:31:29,408 " Hey, maybe this guy has feelings. 381 00:31:30,153 --> 00:31:32,519 Maybe I should cut him some slack. 382 00:31:32,656 --> 00:31:36,023 Cause maybe... just maybe... 383 00:31:36,159 --> 00:31:39,856 ...this guy's gonna turn out to be, I don't know, a king? 384 00:31:39,996 --> 00:31:45,024 Maybe his first royal decree will be to banish everyone who ever picked on him." 385 00:31:45,168 --> 00:31:48,035 I'm looking at you, jousting team! 386 00:31:48,371 --> 00:31:51,568 And Guin? Oh, Guin. 387 00:31:52,442 --> 00:31:53,773 I've always loved you. 388 00:31:55,645 --> 00:31:58,205 Good friends, it breaks my heart, but... 389 00:31:58,348 --> 00:32:01,840 ...enjoy your stay here in prison while I rule the free world! 390 00:32:01,985 --> 00:32:03,577 Okay, let's not overdo it. 391 00:32:03,720 --> 00:32:07,053 I'm building my city, people... on rock 'n ' roll! 392 00:32:07,190 --> 00:32:09,055 You just overdid it. 393 00:32:18,201 --> 00:32:19,828 Look at you! 394 00:32:19,970 --> 00:32:21,494 You look darling. 395 00:32:21,638 --> 00:32:23,833 Just precious. Look at her. 396 00:32:23,974 --> 00:32:26,340 Any cravings since you got pregnant? 397 00:32:26,476 --> 00:32:29,104 No. Not at all. 398 00:32:29,946 --> 00:32:31,675 Do you smell ham? 399 00:32:31,815 --> 00:32:34,943 It's present time! 400 00:32:36,820 --> 00:32:40,881 Fiona, please open mine first. It's the one in front. 401 00:32:41,024 --> 00:32:45,654 " Oongratulations on your new mess mak..." Oh, mess maker! 402 00:32:45,795 --> 00:32:48,787 " Hopefully this helps. Love, Oinderella." 403 00:32:50,133 --> 00:32:51,794 - Look at that! - What is it? 404 00:32:53,370 --> 00:32:55,838 It's for the poopies. 405 00:32:55,972 --> 00:32:57,530 Wait... babies poop? 406 00:32:57,674 --> 00:32:59,005 Everyone poops, Beauty. 407 00:32:59,142 --> 00:33:00,609 Fiona! 408 00:33:00,744 --> 00:33:03,577 We all chipped in for a little present, too. 409 00:33:04,481 --> 00:33:06,039 Ta-da! 410 00:33:07,250 --> 00:33:10,083 You know the baby will love it, because I do! 411 00:33:10,220 --> 00:33:13,189 Guys, that's so sweet. Thank you. 412 00:33:13,323 --> 00:33:14,722 Who's this one from? 413 00:33:14,858 --> 00:33:17,793 I got you the biggest one, because I love you most. 414 00:33:17,927 --> 00:33:20,987 " Have one on me. Love, Snow White." 415 00:33:23,833 --> 00:33:25,460 What is it? 416 00:33:25,602 --> 00:33:27,126 He's a live-in babysitter. 417 00:33:27,270 --> 00:33:28,362 Where's the baby? 418 00:33:28,505 --> 00:33:32,566 You're too kind, Snow, but I can't accept this. 419 00:33:32,709 --> 00:33:35,075 It's nothing. I have six more at home. 420 00:33:35,211 --> 00:33:36,974 - What does he do? - Oleaning. 421 00:33:37,113 --> 00:33:38,705 - Feeding. - Burping. 422 00:33:38,848 --> 00:33:41,316 So, what are Shrek and I supposed to do? 423 00:33:41,451 --> 00:33:43,578 Work on your marriage. 424 00:33:43,720 --> 00:33:47,588 Thanks, Rapunzel. What's that supposed to mean? 425 00:33:47,724 --> 00:33:51,751 Oome on now, Fiona. You know what happens. 426 00:33:52,696 --> 00:33:54,721 You're tired all the time. 427 00:33:54,864 --> 00:33:56,593 You start letting yourself go. 428 00:33:56,733 --> 00:33:57,893 Stretch marks. 429 00:33:58,034 --> 00:33:59,365 Say goodbye to romance. 430 00:34:01,705 --> 00:34:05,141 I'm sorry, but how many of you have kids? 431 00:34:05,275 --> 00:34:06,833 She's right! 432 00:34:06,976 --> 00:34:11,413 A baby will only strengthen the love Shrek and Fiona have. 433 00:34:11,548 --> 00:34:14,381 How did Shrek react when you told him? 434 00:34:15,552 --> 00:34:18,715 When he first found out, Shrek said... 435 00:34:31,568 --> 00:34:35,902 Onward, my new friends! To our happily ever afters! 436 00:34:41,578 --> 00:34:43,739 Now... bombs away! 437 00:35:00,263 --> 00:35:03,130 Well, well, well. If it isn't Peter Pan. 438 00:35:03,266 --> 00:35:05,734 - His name's not Peter. - Shut it, Wendy. 439 00:35:24,287 --> 00:35:27,950 Enough pillaging! To the castle! 440 00:35:46,309 --> 00:35:47,776 You go! Take care of the baby! 441 00:35:47,911 --> 00:35:51,074 Everybody stay calm! We're going to die! 442 00:35:55,485 --> 00:35:57,612 Everyone in! Now! 443 00:35:57,754 --> 00:35:59,881 Oome on! Put some back into it! 444 00:36:03,226 --> 00:36:04,716 We don't have time. Now go! 445 00:36:04,861 --> 00:36:06,658 Quickly, ladies! 446 00:36:08,932 --> 00:36:10,490 We'll hold them off as long as we can! 447 00:36:26,182 --> 00:36:28,582 Where are Shrek and Fiona? 448 00:36:28,718 --> 00:36:30,879 The name doesn't ring a bell. 449 00:36:31,020 --> 00:36:32,715 No bell. 450 00:36:32,856 --> 00:36:36,223 I suggest you freaks cooperate... 451 00:36:36,359 --> 00:36:38,953 ...with the new King of Far Far Away! 452 00:36:39,095 --> 00:36:42,792 The only thing you're ever gonna be king of is King of the Stupids! 453 00:36:42,932 --> 00:36:45,230 - Hook! - Right! 454 00:36:45,368 --> 00:36:47,598 Avast, ye cookie. 455 00:36:50,206 --> 00:36:51,867 Start talking. 456 00:36:56,246 --> 00:36:57,736 - Gingy! - Papa! 457 00:36:57,881 --> 00:36:59,246 Settle down now. 458 00:37:13,229 --> 00:37:16,528 On the good ship Lollipop 459 00:37:16,666 --> 00:37:20,102 It's a sweet trip to the candy shop 460 00:37:20,236 --> 00:37:21,225 You! 461 00:37:22,071 --> 00:37:24,266 You can't lie. 462 00:37:24,407 --> 00:37:28,070 So tell me, puppet... where is Shrek? 463 00:37:31,080 --> 00:37:34,311 Well... I don't know where he's not. 464 00:37:34,450 --> 00:37:36,645 You don't know where Shrek is? 465 00:37:36,786 --> 00:37:39,380 It wouldn't be inaccurate to assume... 466 00:37:39,522 --> 00:37:43,788 ...that I couldn't exactly not say that is or isn't almost partially incorrect. 467 00:37:43,927 --> 00:37:45,292 So you do know where he is! 468 00:37:45,428 --> 00:37:47,953 On the contrary, I'm possibly more or less 469 00:37:48,097 --> 00:37:50,327 not definitely rejecting the idea 470 00:37:50,466 --> 00:37:54,129 that in no way, with any amount of uncertainty... 471 00:37:54,270 --> 00:37:55,259 Stop it! 472 00:37:55,405 --> 00:37:57,532 ...I do not know where he shouldn't be. 473 00:37:57,674 --> 00:38:00,142 If that indeed wasn't where he isn't . 474 00:38:00,276 --> 00:38:03,871 Even if he wasn't not where I knew he was, it could mean... 475 00:38:04,013 --> 00:38:06,243 On the good ship Lollipop 476 00:38:06,382 --> 00:38:10,785 Enough! Shrek went off to bring back the next heir! 477 00:38:13,790 --> 00:38:15,587 He's bringing back the next heir? 478 00:38:15,725 --> 00:38:17,215 No! 479 00:38:18,461 --> 00:38:21,658 Hook! Get rid of this new " King" . 480 00:38:21,798 --> 00:38:23,663 But bring Shrek to me. 481 00:38:23,800 --> 00:38:26,997 I have something special in mind for him. 482 00:38:27,136 --> 00:38:29,297 He'll never fall for your tricks! 483 00:38:30,974 --> 00:38:32,635 Oh, boy. 484 00:38:42,485 --> 00:38:45,511 I can't believe it. Me, a king? 485 00:38:45,655 --> 00:38:48,681 I knew I came from royalty, but... 486 00:38:48,825 --> 00:38:50,918 ...I figured everyone forgot about me. 487 00:38:51,060 --> 00:38:54,791 Oh, no. In fact the King asked for you personally. 488 00:38:54,931 --> 00:38:57,491 Really? Wow. 489 00:38:58,835 --> 00:39:01,065 But I know it's not all fun and games. 490 00:39:01,204 --> 00:39:04,196 It really is all fun and games, actually. 491 00:39:04,340 --> 00:39:07,935 Sure, you have to knight a few heroes, launch a ship or two. 492 00:39:08,077 --> 00:39:12,411 By the way, make sure you hit the boat just right with the bottle. 493 00:39:12,548 --> 00:39:15,346 Any idiot can hit a boat with a bottle. 494 00:39:16,185 --> 00:39:19,120 Well, I've heard it's harder than it looks. 495 00:39:19,255 --> 00:39:21,223 This is going to be huge. 496 00:39:21,357 --> 00:39:26,226 Parties, princesses, castles. Princesses. 497 00:39:26,362 --> 00:39:29,229 You'll be living in the lap of luxury. 498 00:39:29,365 --> 00:39:31,833 The finest chefs will wait for your order. 499 00:39:31,968 --> 00:39:34,937 And fortunately, you'll have the royal food tasters. 500 00:39:35,071 --> 00:39:36,766 What do they do? 501 00:39:36,906 --> 00:39:41,502 Taste the food before the King eats, to make sure it's not poisoned. 502 00:39:41,644 --> 00:39:44,238 - Poisoned? - Or too salty. 503 00:39:44,380 --> 00:39:47,907 Don't worry. Your bodyguards will keep you safe. 504 00:39:48,051 --> 00:39:50,315 All of them willing at a moment's notice 505 00:39:50,453 --> 00:39:53,286 to lay down their lives out of devotion to you. 506 00:39:53,423 --> 00:39:54,856 Really? 507 00:39:54,991 --> 00:39:58,017 The whole kingdom will look to you for wisdom and guidance. 508 00:39:58,394 --> 00:40:00,328 Make sure they don't die of famine! 509 00:40:00,463 --> 00:40:02,192 - Or plague. - Plague is bad. 510 00:40:02,331 --> 00:40:05,232 The coughing, the groaning, the festering sores. 511 00:40:06,803 --> 00:40:11,240 Festering sores! You are one funny kitty cat. 512 00:40:11,908 --> 00:40:13,307 What did I say? 513 00:40:13,443 --> 00:40:15,809 We don't want Artie getting the wrong idea. 514 00:40:16,579 --> 00:40:17,739 Artie? 515 00:40:22,018 --> 00:40:23,781 There goes my hip! 516 00:40:23,920 --> 00:40:26,081 Artie! What are you doing? 517 00:40:28,024 --> 00:40:30,151 What does it look like?! 518 00:40:32,829 --> 00:40:35,297 This really isn't up to you. 519 00:40:35,431 --> 00:40:38,298 I don't know anything about being king! 520 00:40:38,434 --> 00:40:40,368 You'll learn on the job! 521 00:40:42,271 --> 00:40:44,796 Sorry, but I'm going back. 522 00:40:44,941 --> 00:40:47,375 Back to what? Being a loser? 523 00:40:50,947 --> 00:40:52,505 Now look what you did! 524 00:40:53,282 --> 00:40:57,116 Look what I did? Who's holding the wheel, chief? 525 00:40:58,121 --> 00:40:59,611 Shrek! 526 00:41:11,968 --> 00:41:13,959 Land ho! 527 00:41:26,482 --> 00:41:28,313 How humiliating. 528 00:41:29,318 --> 00:41:32,253 Oh, nice going, Your Highness. 529 00:41:32,388 --> 00:41:36,085 Now it's "Your Highness" ? What happened to " loser" ? 530 00:41:36,225 --> 00:41:39,126 If you think this is getting you out of anything, it isn't . 531 00:41:39,262 --> 00:41:43,028 We're heading back to Far Far Away one way or another... 532 00:41:43,166 --> 00:41:45,600 ...and you're going to be a father! 533 00:41:45,735 --> 00:41:47,168 What? 534 00:41:48,004 --> 00:41:49,562 You just said "father" . 535 00:41:49,705 --> 00:41:52,435 King! You're going to be king! 536 00:41:52,575 --> 00:41:55,567 "You're going to be king!" Yeah, right. 537 00:41:56,779 --> 00:41:58,212 Where are you going? 538 00:41:58,347 --> 00:42:00,815 Far Far Away... from you! 539 00:42:00,950 --> 00:42:02,918 Get back here, young man! 540 00:42:04,887 --> 00:42:07,378 Boss? I don't think he's coming back. 541 00:42:07,523 --> 00:42:10,720 Maybe it's for the best. He's not exactly king material. 542 00:42:10,860 --> 00:42:14,091 When did you plan to tell him you were supposed to be king? 543 00:42:14,230 --> 00:42:17,063 Oome on. Why would I do that? 544 00:42:17,200 --> 00:42:20,260 Besides, he'll be ten times better at it than me. 545 00:42:20,403 --> 00:42:24,362 Then change your tactics if you want to get anywhere with him. 546 00:42:26,709 --> 00:42:28,540 You're right, Donkey. 547 00:42:30,880 --> 00:42:32,404 What about this? 548 00:42:32,548 --> 00:42:36,382 - Shrek! - Oome on. It's just a joke. 549 00:42:37,954 --> 00:42:39,285 Still... 550 00:42:56,072 --> 00:42:57,733 Listen, Artie. 551 00:42:58,307 --> 00:43:03,438 If you think this whole mad scene ain't dope, I feel you, dude. 552 00:43:03,579 --> 00:43:07,709 I'm not trying to get up in your grill or raise your roof. 553 00:43:07,850 --> 00:43:09,977 But what I am screamin' is, yo... 554 00:43:10,119 --> 00:43:13,316 ...check out this kazing thazing, bazaby! 555 00:43:13,456 --> 00:43:15,549 If it doesn't groove, or what I'm saying 556 00:43:15,691 --> 00:43:18,626 ain't straight trippin', say, " Oh, no, you didn't ! 557 00:43:18,761 --> 00:43:21,195 You're getting on my last nerve." 558 00:43:21,330 --> 00:43:24,322 And then I'll know it's ... I'll know it's wack! 559 00:43:25,935 --> 00:43:27,129 Help! 560 00:43:27,270 --> 00:43:30,671 I've been kidnapped by a monster who's trying to relate to me! 561 00:43:30,806 --> 00:43:34,435 - Artie, wait. - Oome on! Help! Hello? 562 00:43:35,945 --> 00:43:39,642 Greetings, cosmic children of the universe. 563 00:43:39,782 --> 00:43:41,716 Welcome to my serenity circle. 564 00:43:41,851 --> 00:43:45,981 Please leave any bad vibes outside the healing vortex. 565 00:43:46,122 --> 00:43:47,953 Now prepare to... 566 00:43:53,629 --> 00:43:56,462 I knew I should have got that warranty! 567 00:43:59,368 --> 00:44:00,835 Mr. Merlin? 568 00:44:00,970 --> 00:44:02,437 You know this guy? 569 00:44:02,571 --> 00:44:06,837 Yeah. He was the school magic teacher, until he had his nervous breakdown. 570 00:44:06,976 --> 00:44:10,343 Technically, I was merely a victim of a level 3 fatigue. 571 00:44:10,479 --> 00:44:12,572 At the request of my therapist, 572 00:44:12,715 --> 00:44:16,344 and the school authorities, I retired to the tranquility of nature 573 00:44:16,485 --> 00:44:18,646 to discover my divine purpose. 574 00:44:20,156 --> 00:44:23,557 Oan I interest anyone in a snack or beverage? 575 00:44:23,693 --> 00:44:24,785 Uh, no. 576 00:44:24,927 --> 00:44:28,260 Sure you don't want to try my Rock Au Gratin? 577 00:44:31,167 --> 00:44:32,634 It's organic. 578 00:44:32,768 --> 00:44:35,202 Thanks. I ate a boulder on the way in. 579 00:44:35,338 --> 00:44:38,273 We need directions to Far Far Away. 580 00:44:38,407 --> 00:44:40,932 "We" ? Who said I was going with you? 581 00:44:41,077 --> 00:44:45,446 I did. People are counting on you, so don't try to weasel out of it. 582 00:44:45,581 --> 00:44:47,640 If the job's so great, you do it. 583 00:44:48,184 --> 00:44:52,450 Understand this, kid. No more Mr. Nice Guy from here on out. 584 00:44:52,588 --> 00:44:54,886 That was your Mr. Nice Guy? 585 00:44:55,024 --> 00:44:56,958 Yeah, and I'm going to miss him. 586 00:44:57,093 --> 00:45:01,496 Why don't you go terrorize a village and leave me alone! 587 00:45:01,630 --> 00:45:06,158 Was that a crack about ogres? You get your royal highness to Far Far Away... 588 00:45:06,302 --> 00:45:10,329 ...before I kick it there! Now, which way am I kicking? 589 00:45:10,473 --> 00:45:12,304 I could tell you, but since you're 590 00:45:12,441 --> 00:45:14,966 in the midst of a self-destructive rage spiral, 591 00:45:15,111 --> 00:45:17,636 it would be karmically irresponsible. 592 00:45:17,780 --> 00:45:21,443 Self-destructive...? Are you going to help us or not? 593 00:45:21,584 --> 00:45:24,178 Most definitely, but only after you 594 00:45:24,320 --> 00:45:27,517 take the journey to your soul! 595 00:45:27,656 --> 00:45:29,021 I don't think so. 596 00:45:29,158 --> 00:45:32,992 It's either that or primal scream therapy. 597 00:45:35,064 --> 00:45:37,726 All right. Journey to the soul. 598 00:45:38,567 --> 00:45:40,432 Now, all of you, 599 00:45:40,569 --> 00:45:43,094 look into the Fire of Truth 600 00:45:43,239 --> 00:45:46,231 and tell me what you see. 601 00:45:49,078 --> 00:45:50,943 Ooh, charades! 602 00:45:51,080 --> 00:45:55,847 Okay, I see a Dutch fudge torte with cinnamon swirls! 603 00:45:55,985 --> 00:45:58,579 Okay, monster... go for it. 604 00:46:07,263 --> 00:46:08,958 I see a rainbow pony. 605 00:46:09,098 --> 00:46:11,032 Excellent work! Now the boy. 606 00:46:11,167 --> 00:46:12,634 This is lame. 607 00:46:12,768 --> 00:46:15,032 You're lame! Now just go for it. 608 00:46:16,605 --> 00:46:17,936 Okay. 609 00:46:18,774 --> 00:46:23,211 There's a baby bird and a father bird sitting in a nest. 610 00:46:23,345 --> 00:46:25,336 Yes! Stay with it! 611 00:46:26,182 --> 00:46:30,175 The dad just flew away. Why did he leave the little bird all alone? 612 00:46:30,853 --> 00:46:34,289 It's trying to fly, but it doesn't know how to. 613 00:46:35,191 --> 00:46:37,352 It's going to fall! 614 00:46:42,198 --> 00:46:46,191 Proper head case you are. Really messed up. 615 00:46:49,538 --> 00:46:54,532 Okay, I get it. The bird's me. My dad left. So what? 616 00:47:06,555 --> 00:47:09,217 Look, Artie, um... 617 00:47:13,562 --> 00:47:16,326 Just thought I'd help set the mood... 618 00:47:16,465 --> 00:47:19,798 ...for your big heart-to-heart chat. 619 00:47:28,244 --> 00:47:31,577 I know what it's like to not feel ready for something. 620 00:47:33,916 --> 00:47:36,248 Even ogres get scared. 621 00:47:37,086 --> 00:47:39,919 You know... once in a while. 622 00:47:41,924 --> 00:47:45,690 I know you want me to be king, but I can't . 623 00:47:45,828 --> 00:47:48,695 I'm not cut out for it, and I never will be. 624 00:47:49,598 --> 00:47:52,089 Even my own dad knew I wasn't worth the trouble. 625 00:47:52,234 --> 00:47:55,431 He dumped me at that school first chance he got... 626 00:47:56,105 --> 00:47:58,437 ...and I never heard from him again. 627 00:48:00,109 --> 00:48:03,943 My dad wasn't really the fatherly type, either. 628 00:48:04,446 --> 00:48:06,607 I doubt he was worse than mine. 629 00:48:07,449 --> 00:48:08,746 Oh, yeah? 630 00:48:08,884 --> 00:48:12,945 My father was an ogre. He tried to eat me. 631 00:48:13,789 --> 00:48:15,984 I guess I should have realized it. 632 00:48:16,125 --> 00:48:20,391 He bathed me in barbecue sauce and put me to bed with an apple in my mouth. 633 00:48:22,298 --> 00:48:24,789 I guess that's pretty bad. 634 00:48:27,136 --> 00:48:29,331 It may be hard to believe, 635 00:48:29,471 --> 00:48:32,929 what, with my obvious charm and good looks, 636 00:48:33,075 --> 00:48:36,010 but people used to think I was a monster. 637 00:48:36,145 --> 00:48:39,808 And for a long time, I believed them. 638 00:48:41,817 --> 00:48:43,409 But after a while, 639 00:48:43,552 --> 00:48:47,079 you learn to ignore the names people call you 640 00:48:47,223 --> 00:48:49,555 and just trust who you are. 641 00:48:51,660 --> 00:48:54,823 You know... you're okay, Shrek. 642 00:48:55,664 --> 00:48:59,225 You just need to do a little less yelling and use a little more soap. 643 00:49:00,569 --> 00:49:02,196 Thanks, Artie. 644 00:49:02,338 --> 00:49:06,001 The soap's because you stink... really bad. 645 00:49:07,176 --> 00:49:09,667 Yeah... I got that. 646 00:49:13,682 --> 00:49:16,549 This place is filthy! 647 00:49:16,852 --> 00:49:18,444 I feel like a hobo. 648 00:49:19,688 --> 00:49:22,452 I'm sorry, but this isn't working for me. 649 00:49:22,591 --> 00:49:27,153 Everything's always about you. It's not like your attitude is helping. 650 00:49:27,296 --> 00:49:30,993 Maybe itjust bothers you I was voted fairest in the land. 651 00:49:31,133 --> 00:49:33,226 You mean in that rigged election? 652 00:49:33,369 --> 00:49:36,338 Give me a break. " Rapunzel, Rapunzel... 653 00:49:36,472 --> 00:49:39,600 ...let down thy golden extensions!" 654 00:49:39,742 --> 00:49:44,543 Ladies, let go of your petty complaints and let's work together! 655 00:49:47,516 --> 00:49:50,508 So I guess the plan is we just wander aimlessly 656 00:49:50,653 --> 00:49:52,746 in this stinkhole until we rot. 657 00:49:52,888 --> 00:49:56,415 No, we get inside and find out what Oharming's up to. 658 00:49:56,558 --> 00:49:59,254 I know he's a jerk and everything, 659 00:49:59,395 --> 00:50:03,559 but that Oharming makes me hotter than July. 660 00:50:04,900 --> 00:50:06,231 That's it! 661 00:50:34,263 --> 00:50:36,629 Oome on! This way! 662 00:50:36,765 --> 00:50:37,754 Rapunzel, wait! 663 00:50:47,276 --> 00:50:49,107 Oharming, let go of her. 664 00:50:49,244 --> 00:50:51,872 But why would I want to do that? 665 00:50:57,419 --> 00:50:58,408 What? 666 00:50:58,554 --> 00:51:03,651 Say hello, ladies, to the new Queen of Far Far Away. 667 00:51:07,663 --> 00:51:09,460 Rapunzel, how could you? 668 00:51:09,598 --> 00:51:11,862 Jealous much? 669 00:51:12,000 --> 00:51:14,434 Soon you'll be back where you started, 670 00:51:14,570 --> 00:51:17,198 scrubbing floors or locked away in towers. 671 00:51:17,339 --> 00:51:20,968 That is, if I let you last the week. 672 00:51:23,278 --> 00:51:25,872 Pookie, you promised not to hurt them. 673 00:51:26,014 --> 00:51:30,007 Not here, kitten whiskers. Daddy will discuss it later. 674 00:51:30,753 --> 00:51:33,278 Now forgive us. We have a show to put on. 675 00:51:33,422 --> 00:51:36,687 Shrek will be back soon, and you'll be sorry. 676 00:51:36,825 --> 00:51:38,224 Sorry?! 677 00:51:38,360 --> 00:51:42,626 Don't you realize once Shrek sets foot in Far Far Away... 678 00:51:42,765 --> 00:51:44,528 ...he's doomed? 679 00:52:24,072 --> 00:52:25,699 Look out! They got a piano! 680 00:52:25,841 --> 00:52:29,208 Kill them all... except the fat one. 681 00:52:29,344 --> 00:52:33,713 King Oharming has something special in mind for you, ogre. 682 00:52:33,849 --> 00:52:35,146 King Oharming? 683 00:52:35,284 --> 00:52:36,308 Attack! 684 00:52:42,591 --> 00:52:43,751 Artie, duck! 685 00:52:58,307 --> 00:52:59,569 Ready the plank! 686 00:53:15,290 --> 00:53:16,951 - Shrek! - Help! 687 00:53:36,278 --> 00:53:37,575 Oowards! 688 00:53:37,713 --> 00:53:40,079 What has Oharming done with Fiona? 689 00:53:40,215 --> 00:53:42,809 She's going to get what's coming to her. 690 00:53:43,385 --> 00:53:48,288 And there ain't nothing you can do to stop him! 691 00:53:48,423 --> 00:53:50,948 - We've got to save her. - But she's so far far away! 692 00:53:51,894 --> 00:53:54,192 Get yourself back to Worcestershire, kid. 693 00:53:54,329 --> 00:53:57,821 No, Shrek. Hold on. I've got an idea. 694 00:53:57,966 --> 00:54:00,230 I am a buzzing bee. 695 00:54:00,903 --> 00:54:04,100 Mr. Merlin? They need a spell to get them... 696 00:54:04,239 --> 00:54:07,265 ...I mean us, back to Far Far Away. 697 00:54:07,409 --> 00:54:10,845 Forget it. I don't have that kind of magic in me anymore. 698 00:54:10,979 --> 00:54:14,676 How about a hug? That's the best kind of magic. 699 00:54:14,816 --> 00:54:17,182 Please. I know you can do it. 700 00:54:17,319 --> 00:54:19,116 I said forget it! 701 00:54:19,254 --> 00:54:20,585 But... 702 00:54:27,996 --> 00:54:29,588 What's with you? 703 00:54:30,933 --> 00:54:34,096 It's just so hard, you know? 704 00:54:34,770 --> 00:54:38,900 They need to get back, cause their kingdom's in trouble. 705 00:54:39,041 --> 00:54:41,566 Cause there's a really bad man. 706 00:54:41,710 --> 00:54:43,473 It's just so hard! 707 00:54:43,612 --> 00:54:45,739 Take it easy. 708 00:54:45,881 --> 00:54:49,248 No! I don't think you understand! 709 00:54:49,384 --> 00:54:53,912 There's a mean person doing mean things to good people. 710 00:54:54,056 --> 00:54:55,751 Have a heart, old man. 711 00:54:55,891 --> 00:55:00,055 They really need your help to get back. Why won't you help them?! 712 00:55:03,899 --> 00:55:05,491 Okay. 713 00:55:05,634 --> 00:55:07,625 I'll go get my things. 714 00:55:10,405 --> 00:55:11,599 Piece of cake. 715 00:55:11,740 --> 00:55:15,267 Well, well. You want eggs with that ham? 716 00:55:15,410 --> 00:55:19,107 I am a little rusty, so there could be some side effects. 717 00:55:19,247 --> 00:55:20,714 - Side effects? - Don't worry. 718 00:55:20,849 --> 00:55:24,615 Whatever it is, no matter how excruciatingly painful, 719 00:55:24,753 --> 00:55:27,916 it will wear off eventually. I think. 720 00:55:29,891 --> 00:55:32,121 - Oops. - You sure about this? 721 00:55:32,260 --> 00:55:36,390 If Artie trusts him, that's good enough for me. 722 00:55:36,531 --> 00:55:38,396 Even if his robe doesn't cover... 723 00:55:38,533 --> 00:55:41,058 Alacritious expeditious... 724 00:55:41,203 --> 00:55:43,899 ...a-zoomy-zoom-zoom! 725 00:55:44,039 --> 00:55:46,872 Let's help our friends get back... 726 00:55:49,611 --> 00:55:50,942 ...soon! 727 00:55:58,286 --> 00:55:59,878 It worked! 728 00:56:08,597 --> 00:56:11,623 I haven't been on a trip like that since college! 729 00:56:12,067 --> 00:56:13,329 Donkey? 730 00:56:13,468 --> 00:56:16,301 What? Is something in my teeth? 731 00:56:18,740 --> 00:56:23,734 Oh, no! I've been abracadabra-ed into a Fancy Feastin', second-rate sidekick! 732 00:56:26,081 --> 00:56:30,142 At least you don't look like some kind of bloated piņata! 733 00:56:30,285 --> 00:56:32,344 You should think about going on a diet! 734 00:56:32,487 --> 00:56:37,083 You should get yourself a pair of pants. I feel all exposed and nasty! 735 00:56:38,760 --> 00:56:41,092 So you two think this is funny? 736 00:56:43,598 --> 00:56:45,395 I'm really sorry, guys. 737 00:56:45,534 --> 00:56:48,002 Don't be. You got us back, kid. 738 00:56:53,675 --> 00:56:55,802 How in the Hans Ohristian Andersen 739 00:56:55,944 --> 00:56:58,708 am I supposed to parade around in these goofy boots? 740 00:56:58,847 --> 00:57:01,680 Hey, hey, hey! Be very careful with those. 741 00:57:03,118 --> 00:57:06,451 They were made in Madrid by the finest... 742 00:57:07,122 --> 00:57:09,113 You'll learn to control that. 743 00:57:12,027 --> 00:57:17,021 Seriously. Ow! You need some comfort inserts or arch supports or something. 744 00:57:23,205 --> 00:57:28,074 Watch it. I'm walking here and I'm gonna keep going until... 745 00:57:28,210 --> 00:57:29,302 Pinocchio! 746 00:57:30,045 --> 00:57:32,070 Shrek! Help me! 747 00:57:32,214 --> 00:57:35,411 - What happened? - Oharming and the villains took over! 748 00:57:35,550 --> 00:57:39,316 Fiona and the Princesses got away. Now she's ... 749 00:57:39,454 --> 00:57:40,978 She's what?! What?! 750 00:57:43,325 --> 00:57:45,156 Puss! Loan me five bucks. 751 00:57:45,293 --> 00:57:47,523 You heard him. Help the brother out. 752 00:57:47,662 --> 00:57:49,755 Do you see any pockets on me? 753 00:57:49,898 --> 00:57:51,729 Hold on a second. 754 00:57:54,236 --> 00:57:58,400 I had no idea, really. I... I swear. 755 00:57:59,574 --> 00:58:01,769 Quick! Where is Fiona? 756 00:58:01,910 --> 00:58:05,676 Oharming has her locked away someplace. You have to find him! 757 00:58:05,814 --> 00:58:08,681 He's probably getting ready for the show! 758 00:58:08,817 --> 00:58:11,149 Wait, Pinocchio! What show? 759 00:58:16,158 --> 00:58:18,558 " It's a Happily Ever After After All" . 760 00:58:18,693 --> 00:58:21,025 " Shrek's final performance" ? 761 00:58:21,163 --> 00:58:25,293 Shrek! You didn't tell us you were in a play! 762 00:58:25,433 --> 00:58:28,891 I guess I've been so busy I forgot to mention it. 763 00:58:29,037 --> 00:58:30,595 The ogre! Get him! 764 00:58:31,940 --> 00:58:34,272 Don't worry, jefe. I got this. 765 00:58:40,816 --> 00:58:42,443 Uck! Kill it! 766 00:58:43,451 --> 00:58:48,582 Look. Don't you know who he thinks he is? How dare you! 767 00:58:48,723 --> 00:58:50,247 We're dealing with amateurs. 768 00:58:50,392 --> 00:58:55,329 He's a star, people! Hello? I'm so sorry about this, Mr. Shrek. 769 00:58:55,463 --> 00:58:56,987 I'm going to lose it! 770 00:58:57,132 --> 00:59:00,932 Is everything ready? You did get the list for the dressing room? 771 00:59:01,069 --> 00:59:04,163 Breakfast croissant stuffed with seared sashimi tuna. 772 00:59:04,306 --> 00:59:07,605 And I hope you have the saffron corn with jalapeno honey butter. 773 00:59:07,742 --> 00:59:10,734 Our client cannot get into his proper emotional state 774 00:59:10,879 --> 00:59:12,676 withoutjalapeno honey butter! 775 00:59:12,814 --> 00:59:14,213 I just lost it. 776 00:59:14,983 --> 00:59:17,508 They should talk to Nancy in Human Resources. 777 00:59:17,652 --> 00:59:21,144 Oh, we will have much to say to Nancy, I promise! 778 00:59:22,824 --> 00:59:26,521 "With this sword, I do..." No. "With..." 779 00:59:26,661 --> 00:59:30,324 "With this sword, I do smote thee!" 780 00:59:31,233 --> 00:59:33,701 Is " smote" the right word? " Smoot" ? 781 00:59:33,835 --> 00:59:35,700 I don't think that's a word. 782 00:59:35,837 --> 00:59:40,171 Maybe I should just " smite" him. Let's try this again. Now... 783 00:59:41,343 --> 00:59:44,506 Shrek attacks me. I pretend to be afraid. 784 00:59:45,247 --> 00:59:49,650 " Now the kingdom will get the happily ever after they deserve. Die, ogre!" 785 00:59:49,784 --> 00:59:53,447 Blah, blah, blah. Oh, itjust doesn't feel real enough! 786 00:59:55,357 --> 00:59:57,382 Who told you to stop dancing?! 787 00:59:57,525 --> 00:59:58,992 Wink and turn. 788 00:59:59,127 --> 01:00:02,358 What are you laying around for? Get up! Honestly! 789 01:00:11,039 --> 01:00:14,236 Our happily ever after is nearly complete, Mummy. 790 01:00:14,376 --> 01:00:16,571 And I assure you... 791 01:00:16,711 --> 01:00:21,705 ...the people of this kingdom will pay dearly for every second... 792 01:00:22,884 --> 01:00:24,545 ...we've had to wait. 793 01:00:26,154 --> 01:00:27,587 Break a leg. 794 01:00:27,722 --> 01:00:30,486 On second thought, let me break it for you. 795 01:00:30,625 --> 01:00:34,925 Thank goodness. I was afraid you wouldn't get back in time. 796 01:00:35,063 --> 01:00:36,690 Where's Fiona? 797 01:00:36,831 --> 01:00:41,063 Don't worry. She and the others are safe... for now. 798 01:00:50,245 --> 01:00:53,578 Let me guess. Arthur. 799 01:00:54,249 --> 01:00:56,274 It's Artie, actually. 800 01:00:56,418 --> 01:01:01,412 This boy is supposed to be the new King of Far Far Away? 801 01:01:03,325 --> 01:01:04,622 How pathetic. 802 01:01:04,759 --> 01:01:07,626 Stand still, so I won't make a mess. 803 01:01:07,762 --> 01:01:11,198 Oharming, stop! I'm here now. You got what you wanted. 804 01:01:11,333 --> 01:01:12,994 This isn't about him. 805 01:01:13,768 --> 01:01:18,102 Then who's it about? I'm supposed to be king, right? 806 01:01:19,441 --> 01:01:23,810 You weren't really next in line for the throne. 807 01:01:23,945 --> 01:01:25,344 I was. 808 01:01:25,480 --> 01:01:28,813 But you said the King asked for me personally. 809 01:01:28,950 --> 01:01:30,781 Not exactly. 810 01:01:30,919 --> 01:01:32,352 What does that mean? 811 01:01:32,487 --> 01:01:34,978 I said whatever I had to say, all right? 812 01:01:35,123 --> 01:01:38,820 I wasn't right for the job, so I needed some fool to replace me. 813 01:01:38,960 --> 01:01:42,623 And you fit the bill. So just go! 814 01:01:45,700 --> 01:01:47,759 You were playing me the whole time. 815 01:01:47,902 --> 01:01:49,665 You catch on real fast, kid. 816 01:01:49,804 --> 01:01:52,898 Maybe you're not as big of a loser as I thought. 817 01:01:59,314 --> 01:02:01,680 You know, for a minute... 818 01:02:01,816 --> 01:02:03,716 - ...I actually thought... - What? 819 01:02:03,852 --> 01:02:07,344 That he cared about you? He's an ogre. 820 01:02:07,489 --> 01:02:09,320 What did you expect? 821 01:02:19,300 --> 01:02:23,327 You really do have a way with children, Shrek. 822 01:02:35,683 --> 01:02:39,483 Leave me out with the waste 823 01:02:39,621 --> 01:02:42,556 This is not what I do 824 01:02:42,690 --> 01:02:46,387 It's the wrong time 825 01:02:46,528 --> 01:02:49,224 She's pulling me through 826 01:02:49,364 --> 01:02:53,061 It's a small crime 827 01:02:53,201 --> 01:02:55,829 And I got no excuse 828 01:02:55,970 --> 01:02:58,370 And is that all right, yeah? 829 01:02:59,841 --> 01:03:01,866 Is that all right with you? 830 01:03:02,710 --> 01:03:07,044 Is that all right, yeah? 831 01:03:07,549 --> 01:03:11,542 If I give my gun away when it's loaded? 832 01:03:13,721 --> 01:03:18,385 If you don't shoot it how am I supposed to hold it? 833 01:03:21,563 --> 01:03:24,430 Is that all right? Is that all right? 834 01:03:24,566 --> 01:03:28,002 Is that all right with you? 835 01:03:28,136 --> 01:03:29,001 No. 836 01:03:29,337 --> 01:03:31,168 Had we stayed put like I suggested, 837 01:03:31,306 --> 01:03:34,104 we'd be sipping tea out of little heart-shaped cups. 838 01:03:34,242 --> 01:03:35,766 Yeah, heart-shaped cups. 839 01:03:35,910 --> 01:03:38,538 And eating crumpets smothered with loganberries. 840 01:03:38,680 --> 01:03:40,272 Yeah, loganberries. 841 01:03:40,415 --> 01:03:42,280 - Shut up, Oindy. - Yeah, shut up. 842 01:03:42,417 --> 01:03:45,284 - No, you shut up. - Stay out of this. 843 01:03:45,420 --> 01:03:48,218 Who cares who's " running the kingdom" ? 844 01:03:48,356 --> 01:03:51,587 - I care. - You should all care. 845 01:03:55,563 --> 01:03:58,464 I have your badge number, tin can! 846 01:03:58,600 --> 01:04:00,465 - Donkey? - Princess! 847 01:04:00,602 --> 01:04:01,591 Puss? 848 01:04:01,736 --> 01:04:05,797 I am Puss, stuck here inside this hideous body. 849 01:04:05,940 --> 01:04:06,964 And I'm me! 850 01:04:07,108 --> 01:04:08,234 But you're... 851 01:04:08,376 --> 01:04:11,038 Everything's fruity in the loops, but what happened is 852 01:04:11,179 --> 01:04:13,147 we went to high school, the boat crashed 853 01:04:13,281 --> 01:04:15,841 and we got bippity-boppity-booped by the magic man. 854 01:04:15,984 --> 01:04:18,179 You poor sweet things. 855 01:04:18,319 --> 01:04:19,718 I don't get it. 856 01:04:19,854 --> 01:04:23,585 The cat turned into a little horse that smells like feet. What's to get? 857 01:04:23,725 --> 01:04:25,090 Who dat? 858 01:04:25,226 --> 01:04:26,250 Where's Shrek? 859 01:04:26,394 --> 01:04:30,387 Oharming has him. He plans to kill Shrek tonight in front of the whole kingdom! 860 01:04:31,799 --> 01:04:35,963 All right, everyone. We need to find a way out now. 861 01:04:36,104 --> 01:04:39,631 You're right. Ladies, assume the position! 862 01:04:44,512 --> 01:04:45,706 What are you doing? 863 01:04:46,481 --> 01:04:47,846 Waiting to be rescued. 864 01:04:47,982 --> 01:04:49,950 You've got to be kidding me. 865 01:04:50,084 --> 01:04:52,848 What else can we do? We're just four... 866 01:04:52,987 --> 01:04:56,286 ...I mean three, super-hot princesses... 867 01:04:56,424 --> 01:05:00,485 ...two circus freaks, a pregnant ogre and an old lady! 868 01:05:01,329 --> 01:05:05,663 Excuse me. Old lady coming through. 869 01:05:14,275 --> 01:05:16,072 Mom! 870 01:05:16,211 --> 01:05:20,477 You didn't think you got your fighting skills from your father, did you? 871 01:05:20,615 --> 01:05:23,345 Excuse me. There's still one more. 872 01:05:33,528 --> 01:05:35,860 Why don't you just lie down? 873 01:05:38,533 --> 01:05:41,400 Okay, girls, from here on out... 874 01:05:41,536 --> 01:05:44,004 ...we take care of business ourselves. 875 01:06:01,055 --> 01:06:05,583 The Far Far Away Theatre at the Charming Pavilion is proud to present... 876 01:06:05,727 --> 01:06:07,490 ..."It's A Happily Ever After After AII." 877 01:06:07,629 --> 01:06:10,928 Enjoy your evening of theatrical reverie, citizen. 878 01:06:11,065 --> 01:06:14,398 Oi! No food or beverages in the theater! 879 01:06:28,249 --> 01:06:29,614 Places, everyone! 880 01:06:34,756 --> 01:06:35,882 Easy! 881 01:06:36,024 --> 01:06:39,926 Sorry. I was showing off for the little one. 882 01:06:40,662 --> 01:06:44,257 It's Bring Your Kids to Work Day. Oome here, beautiful. 883 01:06:47,435 --> 01:06:50,427 Well, she's got your eye. 884 01:06:51,673 --> 01:06:56,610 Who would have thought a monster like me deserved something as special as you? 885 01:07:38,286 --> 01:07:41,312 Little birdies, take wing 886 01:07:42,156 --> 01:07:44,784 Flitting down from the trees they appear 887 01:07:44,926 --> 01:07:47,394 And to chirp in my ear 888 01:07:48,663 --> 01:07:51,655 All because I sing 889 01:08:21,295 --> 01:08:22,353 Move it! Go! 890 01:08:28,970 --> 01:08:30,699 My babies! 891 01:08:31,706 --> 01:08:32,695 Help! 892 01:09:18,252 --> 01:09:20,243 Hey, how's it goin' 893 01:09:30,932 --> 01:09:32,866 O to the K. The coast is clear. 894 01:09:33,000 --> 01:09:35,628 Let's do this. Go, Team Dynamite! 895 01:09:35,770 --> 01:09:39,604 I thought we agreed to use the name Team Super Oool. 896 01:09:39,740 --> 01:09:41,970 I recall it was Team Awesome. 897 01:09:42,109 --> 01:09:44,043 I voted for Team Alpha Wolf Squadron. 898 01:09:44,178 --> 01:09:46,146 Okay! From henceforth, 899 01:09:46,280 --> 01:09:50,410 we will be Team Alpha Super Awesome Oool Dynamite Wolf Squadron. 900 01:09:50,551 --> 01:09:54,783 Ach de liebe! There is some strange little girl over there staring at us! 901 01:09:55,723 --> 01:09:57,088 Artie! 902 01:09:57,225 --> 01:09:58,590 Wait, wait! 903 01:09:58,726 --> 01:10:00,921 Where is the fire, seņor? 904 01:10:01,062 --> 01:10:03,087 Please. Don't act so innocent. 905 01:10:03,231 --> 01:10:06,997 You both knew what was going on and kept it to yourselves. 906 01:10:07,134 --> 01:10:08,726 It's not like it seems. 907 01:10:08,870 --> 01:10:11,703 It's not? I think it seems pretty clear. 908 01:10:11,839 --> 01:10:14,364 He was using me. That's all. 909 01:10:14,509 --> 01:10:16,943 Using you? You really don't get it. 910 01:10:17,078 --> 01:10:20,070 Shrek only said those things to protect you. 911 01:10:20,748 --> 01:10:25,412 Oharming was going to kill you, Artie! Shrek saved your life. 912 01:10:35,997 --> 01:10:37,589 Oue the spot! 913 01:10:41,435 --> 01:10:43,960 I wait alone up here 914 01:10:44,105 --> 01:10:46,801 I'm trapped another day 915 01:10:46,941 --> 01:10:50,138 Locked up here, please set me free 916 01:10:50,278 --> 01:10:53,304 My new life I almost see 917 01:10:53,447 --> 01:10:56,143 A castle, you and me 918 01:10:56,284 --> 01:11:01,381 Yes, a castle, you and me 919 01:11:03,457 --> 01:11:04,515 Oherubs! 920 01:11:08,462 --> 01:11:12,262 Tis I, Tis I Upon my regal steed 921 01:11:12,400 --> 01:11:14,027 Princess, my love 922 01:11:14,168 --> 01:11:16,932 At last you shall be freed I'm strong 923 01:11:17,071 --> 01:11:19,039 And brave And dashing my way there 924 01:11:19,473 --> 01:11:25,139 With speed! With might! With soft and bouncy hair! 925 01:11:26,113 --> 01:11:29,879 - Through the blistering desert - Hot! 926 01:11:30,017 --> 01:11:33,043 - Across the stormiest sea - Wet! 927 01:11:33,187 --> 01:11:35,178 Facing creatures so vile 928 01:11:35,323 --> 01:11:36,449 Foul! 929 01:11:36,591 --> 01:11:40,721 So you can gaze upon me! 930 01:11:42,029 --> 01:11:44,361 I knew you'd come for me 931 01:11:44,498 --> 01:11:48,332 And now we finally meet 932 01:11:48,469 --> 01:11:49,936 I knew you'd wait 933 01:11:50,071 --> 01:11:54,599 And from my plate of love you'd eat 934 01:12:14,528 --> 01:12:17,861 Who is this terribly ugly fiend Who so rudely intervened? 935 01:12:17,999 --> 01:12:19,830 Will Charming fight or flee? 936 01:12:19,967 --> 01:12:21,025 Please rescue me! 937 01:12:21,168 --> 01:12:22,863 From this monstrosity! 938 01:12:23,004 --> 01:12:28,032 Fear thee not, honey lamb! I will slice this thing up like a ham! 939 01:12:29,210 --> 01:12:30,677 Oh, boy. 940 01:12:30,811 --> 01:12:34,406 You are about to enter a world of pain 941 01:12:34,548 --> 01:12:38,882 With which you are not familiar! 942 01:12:42,323 --> 01:12:46,726 It can't be any more painful than your lousy performance. 943 01:12:50,398 --> 01:12:52,389 " Prepare, foul beast." 944 01:12:54,502 --> 01:12:57,767 Prepare, foul beast, your time is done! 945 01:12:57,905 --> 01:13:01,068 Oould you kill me and then sing? 946 01:13:02,576 --> 01:13:04,271 Be quiet! 947 01:13:04,412 --> 01:13:08,542 I'm just having fun with you. That's actually a very nice leotard. 948 01:13:08,683 --> 01:13:09,945 Thank you. 949 01:13:10,084 --> 01:13:12,177 Do they come in men's sizes? 950 01:13:15,256 --> 01:13:16,985 Now that be funny! 951 01:13:17,124 --> 01:13:19,092 Enough! 952 01:13:21,495 --> 01:13:25,295 Now you'll finally know what it's like... 953 01:13:25,433 --> 01:13:28,960 ...to have everything you worked for... 954 01:13:29,103 --> 01:13:33,130 ...everything that's precious to you, taken away. 955 01:13:33,274 --> 01:13:36,607 Now you'll know how I felt. 956 01:13:43,951 --> 01:13:45,612 Sausage roll! 957 01:14:02,970 --> 01:14:05,495 Pray for mercy from Puss! 958 01:14:05,639 --> 01:14:07,129 And Donkey! 959 01:14:07,341 --> 01:14:08,399 D 960 01:14:19,420 --> 01:14:20,682 Hi, honey. 961 01:14:20,821 --> 01:14:23,847 Sorry we're late. You okay? 962 01:14:23,991 --> 01:14:26,323 Much better, now that you're here. 963 01:14:28,996 --> 01:14:34,195 So, Oharming, you want to let me out of these so we can settle this ogre-to-man? 964 01:14:34,335 --> 01:14:38,669 Ooh, that sounds fun. But I have a better idea. 965 01:14:54,522 --> 01:14:56,922 No! Let go of me! 966 01:14:57,057 --> 01:15:01,187 You will not ruin things this time, ogre. Kill it. 967 01:15:05,032 --> 01:15:06,795 Everybody, stop! 968 01:15:08,636 --> 01:15:10,729 Oh, what is it now?! 969 01:15:10,871 --> 01:15:12,133 Artie? 970 01:15:21,816 --> 01:15:24,284 Who thinks we need to settle things this way? 971 01:15:28,556 --> 01:15:32,253 You mean you want to be villains your whole lives? 972 01:15:32,393 --> 01:15:36,193 But we are villains! It's the only thing we know. 973 01:15:36,330 --> 01:15:38,764 You never wish you could be something else? 974 01:15:38,899 --> 01:15:42,357 Easy for you to say. You're not some evil enchanted tree. 975 01:15:42,503 --> 01:15:45,267 You morons! Don't listen to him! Attack! 976 01:15:45,406 --> 01:15:48,204 What Steve means is it's hard to come by honest work 977 01:15:48,342 --> 01:15:50,367 when the whole world's against you. 978 01:15:50,511 --> 01:15:52,240 Right. Thanks, Ed. 979 01:15:52,379 --> 01:15:56,782 Fair enough. You're right. I'm not a talking tree. 980 01:15:56,917 --> 01:15:58,009 But you know... 981 01:15:58,152 --> 01:16:01,280 ...a good friend once told me... 982 01:16:01,422 --> 01:16:06,450 ...just because people treat you like a villain, or an ogre... 983 01:16:06,594 --> 01:16:08,585 ...orjust some loser... 984 01:16:10,097 --> 01:16:11,997 ...doesn't mean you are one. 985 01:16:14,869 --> 01:16:18,737 What matters most is what you think of yourself. 986 01:16:18,873 --> 01:16:23,173 If there's something you really want, or someone you want to be... 987 01:16:23,310 --> 01:16:26,939 ...the only person standing in your way is you. 988 01:16:27,448 --> 01:16:29,211 - Me? - Get him! 989 01:16:29,350 --> 01:16:30,749 No, no, no! 990 01:16:30,885 --> 01:16:33,820 What I mean is each of you... 991 01:16:33,954 --> 01:16:36,218 ...is standing in your own way. 992 01:16:40,127 --> 01:16:42,618 I always wanted to play the flute. 993 01:16:42,763 --> 01:16:46,426 I'd like to open up a spa... in France! 994 01:16:46,567 --> 01:16:51,129 I grow daffodils. And they're beautiful. 995 01:17:39,853 --> 01:17:43,016 A new era finally begins! 996 01:17:44,858 --> 01:17:46,519 Now all of you... 997 01:17:47,361 --> 01:17:49,761 ...bow before your King! 998 01:17:56,203 --> 01:17:58,535 You need to work on your aim. 999 01:18:00,874 --> 01:18:03,741 This was supposed to be my happily ever after! 1000 01:18:03,877 --> 01:18:06,368 Well, you need to keep looking... 1001 01:18:08,382 --> 01:18:10,441 ...because I'm not giving up mine. 1002 01:18:15,723 --> 01:18:16,883 Mommy? 1003 01:18:28,235 --> 01:18:30,396 It's yours if you want it. 1004 01:18:31,071 --> 01:18:33,403 But this time it's your choice. 1005 01:18:56,096 --> 01:18:57,120 Author! 1006 01:18:57,264 --> 01:19:00,597 Artie! Artie! Artie! Artie! 1007 01:19:04,938 --> 01:19:07,930 Excuse me. That's my seat. 1008 01:19:08,942 --> 01:19:13,709 Okay, Seņor Hocusy-Pocusy, the time has come to rectify some wrongs! 1009 01:19:13,847 --> 01:19:16,372 Though I have been enjoying these cat baths. 1010 01:19:16,517 --> 01:19:18,007 Please say you didn't . 1011 01:19:18,152 --> 01:19:20,052 All right! Look. 1012 01:19:20,187 --> 01:19:23,486 You'll feel a pinch and possibly lower intestinal discomfort... 1013 01:19:23,624 --> 01:19:25,956 ...but this should do the trick. 1014 01:19:30,197 --> 01:19:32,665 - Are you...? - I'm me again! 1015 01:19:32,800 --> 01:19:35,064 - And I am not you! - All right! 1016 01:19:36,637 --> 01:19:37,797 Oops. 1017 01:19:39,807 --> 01:19:41,206 Ah, never mind. 1018 01:19:45,212 --> 01:19:49,273 What did I tell you? The kid's going to be a great king. 1019 01:19:49,416 --> 01:19:52,977 Well, for what it's worth, you would have, too. 1020 01:19:54,488 --> 01:19:57,480 I have something much more important in mind. 1021 01:20:23,016 --> 01:20:24,244 Finally. 1022 01:20:31,024 --> 01:20:32,355 Dada. 1023 01:20:34,461 --> 01:20:38,830 Was I wrong about the world? It's a beautiful new place 1024 01:20:38,966 --> 01:20:41,457 I smell Shrek Junior! 1025 01:20:41,602 --> 01:20:44,264 Where else could a creep like me 1026 01:20:44,404 --> 01:20:47,134 Meet such a pretty face 1027 01:20:47,274 --> 01:20:51,210 Meeting every day with the rising sun 1028 01:20:54,014 --> 01:20:56,915 Looking up, it's looking like 1029 01:20:57,050 --> 01:20:59,712 My losing streak is done 1030 01:21:00,621 --> 01:21:01,918 Peek-a-boo! 1031 01:21:02,055 --> 01:21:03,386 Peek-a-boo! 1032 01:21:06,593 --> 01:21:08,424 A bouncy, bouncy, boy! 1033 01:21:08,562 --> 01:21:11,258 Used to always feel like 1034 01:21:11,398 --> 01:21:14,060 Wished that I was dressed better 1035 01:21:15,068 --> 01:21:16,729 Where's the baby? 1036 01:21:16,870 --> 01:21:21,239 Never had a lot of luck Until I finally met her 1037 01:21:30,751 --> 01:21:34,744 Meeting every day with the rising sun 1038 01:21:37,424 --> 01:21:39,585 Looking up, it's looking like 1039 01:21:40,260 --> 01:21:43,093 My losing streak is done 1040 01:21:45,265 --> 01:21:47,597 My losing streak is done 1041 01:21:58,445 --> 01:22:01,107 Well... what shall we do now? 1042 01:22:17,130 --> 01:22:18,791 I got it. 1043 01:22:25,305 --> 01:22:29,674 Puss and Donkey, baby! Once again, come on! 1044 01:22:29,810 --> 01:22:34,440 I want to thank you for letting me be myself 1045 01:22:34,581 --> 01:22:35,673 Again! 1046 01:22:35,816 --> 01:22:37,681 Look at my hips! 1047 01:22:37,818 --> 01:22:43,017 I want to thank you for letting me be myself 1048 01:22:43,156 --> 01:22:44,646 Again! 1049 01:22:49,930 --> 01:22:51,454 - Break it down! - Let's go! 1050 01:22:51,598 --> 01:22:53,998 Stiff all in the collar 1051 01:22:55,836 --> 01:22:57,997 Fluffy in the face 1052 01:23:00,173 --> 01:23:02,664 Chit chat chatter trying 1053 01:23:04,011 --> 01:23:06,172 Stuffy in the place 1054 01:23:08,348 --> 01:23:11,181 Thank you for the par-tay 1055 01:23:12,352 --> 01:23:14,217 But I could never stay 1056 01:23:14,354 --> 01:23:15,685 I'm sorry. 1057 01:23:16,356 --> 01:23:19,348 I got many things on my mind 1058 01:23:20,694 --> 01:23:22,855 But the word's in the way 1059 01:23:23,864 --> 01:23:29,063 And I want to thank you for letting me be myself 1060 01:23:29,202 --> 01:23:30,533 Again 1061 01:23:31,538 --> 01:23:33,506 Different strokes for different folks 1062 01:23:33,640 --> 01:23:37,235 Thank you for letting me be myself 1063 01:23:37,377 --> 01:23:38,867 Again 1064 01:23:41,048 --> 01:23:42,538 Break it down! 1065 01:23:43,550 --> 01:23:46,713 Puss and Donkey, baby! Puss and Donkey, baby! 1066 01:23:47,220 --> 01:23:48,881 Puss and Donkey, baby! 1067 01:23:50,223 --> 01:23:52,384 Dance to the music 1068 01:23:54,227 --> 01:23:56,559 All night long 1069 01:23:58,565 --> 01:24:00,897 Everyday people 1070 01:24:02,569 --> 01:24:04,730 Sing a simple song 1071 01:24:06,740 --> 01:24:09,231 Mama's so happy 1072 01:24:11,078 --> 01:24:13,069 Mama start to cry 1073 01:24:15,248 --> 01:24:17,739 Papa's still singing 1074 01:24:18,919 --> 01:24:22,411 You can make it if you try So try! 1075 01:24:23,590 --> 01:24:27,458 Thank you for letting me be myself 1076 01:24:27,594 --> 01:24:28,925 Again 1077 01:24:31,932 --> 01:24:35,800 Thank you for letting me be myself 1078 01:24:35,936 --> 01:24:37,631 Again 1079 01:24:37,771 --> 01:24:40,638 Oome on, Donkey. Do something right! 1080 01:24:40,774 --> 01:24:43,174 Put the hoofs together! Put the hoofs together! 1081 01:24:44,277 --> 01:24:48,475 Stomp your boots, baby! Stomp your boots, baby! Stomp your boots, baby! 1082 01:24:48,615 --> 01:24:52,483 Thank you for letting me be myself 1083 01:24:52,619 --> 01:24:54,109 Again 1084 01:24:56,289 --> 01:25:00,817 I want to thank you for letting me be myself 1085 01:25:00,961 --> 01:25:02,053 Again 1086 01:25:02,195 --> 01:25:05,164 Thank you, thank you, thank you. 1087 01:25:05,298 --> 01:25:08,495 Want to thank you Just to be my 1088 01:25:08,635 --> 01:25:11,502 Because I just want to be my... See? 1089 01:25:11,638 --> 01:25:14,334 Can I, can I thank you! Can I 1090 01:25:14,474 --> 01:25:16,305 Yes! Yes!