1
00:00:02,914 --> 00:00:04,914
Well, I was driving
my car one night...
2
00:00:08,437 --> 00:00:10,437
I crashed into
a utility pole.
3
00:00:11,860 --> 00:00:15,007
And then to add
insult to injury,
4
00:00:15,208 --> 00:00:18,376
I was electrocuted.
5
00:00:18,478 --> 00:00:20,846
What can I say?
6
00:00:20,533 --> 00:00:23,798
It was one of those days.
7
00:00:23,870 --> 00:00:26,843
All my neighbors
heard it happen,
8
00:00:26,917 --> 00:00:30,117
so they quickly left
their microwaved burritos...
9
00:00:30,180 --> 00:00:34,718
and their expensive jars
of moisturizer...
10
00:00:34,774 --> 00:00:39,503
and their racy
pay-per-view movies...
11
00:00:39,579 --> 00:00:41,202
and they hurried outside,
12
00:00:41,261 --> 00:00:44,195
excited to see
what all the ruckus was about.
13
00:00:44,264 --> 00:00:47,612
But then,
when they saw it was me,
14
00:00:47,685 --> 00:00:50,622
this weird thing happened.
15
00:00:50,676 --> 00:00:55,752
For a moment,
no one moved or said anything.
16
00:00:55,807 --> 00:00:58,147
They just stared.
17
00:00:58,207 --> 00:00:59,457
And then...
18
00:00:59,531 --> 00:01:01,105
Oh, my God.
19
00:01:01,180 --> 00:01:02,963
All hell broke loose.
20
00:01:03,026 --> 00:01:04,820
Does anybody know C.P.R.?
21
00:01:04,896 --> 00:01:06,272
There's been an accident.
22
00:01:06,333 --> 00:01:08,833
Edie!
23
00:01:08,899 --> 00:01:10,693
Can you hear me?
24
00:01:10,767 --> 00:01:14,262
Yes, everyone suddenly
became very concerned,
25
00:01:14,341 --> 00:01:15,787
which was touching,
26
00:01:15,864 --> 00:01:19,110
but ultimately pointless.
27
00:01:20,718 --> 00:01:23,612
Moments before the ambulance
finally arrived,
28
00:01:23,677 --> 00:01:26,184
I heard someone whisper...
29
00:01:26,251 --> 00:01:27,724
Don't worry, Edie.
30
00:01:27,804 --> 00:01:30,727
You're gonna get through this.
You're gonna be just fine.
31
00:01:30,799 --> 00:01:34,675
Susan Mayer--wrong again.
32
00:01:34,745 --> 00:01:38,151
Two seconds later, it happened.
33
00:01:38,222 --> 00:01:41,030
With all of my neighbors
surrounding me,
34
00:01:41,089 --> 00:01:43,999
I took my last breath.
35
00:01:44,066 --> 00:01:45,553
The good news?
36
00:01:45,619 --> 00:01:47,775
I died just like I lived--
37
00:01:47,840 --> 00:01:53,844
as the complete
and utter center of attention.
38
00:02:04,113 --> 00:02:07,484
Two days after I kicked
the proverbial bucket,
39
00:02:07,545 --> 00:02:11,324
my husband asked my neighbors
to do me a favor.
40
00:02:11,398 --> 00:02:13,749
You could tell
from the looks on their faces
41
00:02:13,823 --> 00:02:18,484
It wasn't something
they... wanted to do,
42
00:02:18,551 --> 00:02:21,872
But... they agreed to do it
anyway.
43
00:02:21,952 --> 00:02:25,527
So the next day,
they piled into a car
44
00:02:25,593 --> 00:02:28,297
with two thermoses filled
with coffee,
45
00:02:28,358 --> 00:02:30,889
a basket filled
with baked goods
46
00:02:30,951 --> 00:02:35,546
and an urn that was filled
with... me.
47
00:02:40,103 --> 00:02:42,874
I hate
that we have to do this.
48
00:02:42,941 --> 00:02:43,679
So you've said.
49
00:02:43,680 --> 00:02:46,730
I mean, it really is the kind
of thing a relative should do.
50
00:02:46,780 --> 00:02:50,201
Maybe it is, but we're
in the car, on our way there,
51
00:02:50,260 --> 00:02:51,257
so stop your bitching.
52
00:02:51,258 --> 00:02:53,433
Well, can you at
least put the radio on?
53
00:02:53,506 --> 00:02:56,443
I won't feel like bitching if I
can sing along to something.
54
00:02:56,508 --> 00:02:58,434
If you start singing,
I'll start bitching,
55
00:02:58,501 --> 00:03:00,818
and you don't want that.
It's a 4-hour drive.
56
00:03:00,891 --> 00:03:03,218
We have to do something
to pass the time.
57
00:03:03,284 --> 00:03:06,363
Here's a thought.
Why don't we talk about Edie?
58
00:03:06,418 --> 00:03:08,253
And say what?
59
00:03:08,309 --> 00:03:11,287
I don't know, but she is
the reason we're on this trip.
60
00:03:11,350 --> 00:03:13,714
Uh, maybe we could share
memories or tell stories.
61
00:03:13,775 --> 00:03:16,340
Mm. Why don't you start
with the time
62
00:03:16,419 --> 00:03:18,655
she tried to steal
your comatose boyfriend?
63
00:03:19,077 --> 00:03:21,033
That was fun.
- Okay, I was thinking
64
00:03:21,097 --> 00:03:23,527
of stories that put Edie
in a positive light.
65
00:03:23,595 --> 00:03:26,904
And after that five minutes
is up, then what do we do?
66
00:03:26,969 --> 00:03:30,051
The woman is dead, people.
Let's honor her memory.
67
00:03:30,105 --> 00:03:33,715
Well, I'm all for saying
a few nice things...
68
00:03:33,791 --> 00:03:36,118
but you were
never really friends.
69
00:03:36,188 --> 00:03:39,311
You and Edie clashed
right from the start.
70
00:03:39,396 --> 00:03:42,391
Yeah.
71
00:03:42,457 --> 00:03:45,832
That's what everybody thinks.
72
00:03:45,894 --> 00:03:48,328
But the the first time we met,
73
00:03:48,406 --> 00:03:52,475
it seemed like we'd end up
being the best of friends.
74
00:04:01,928 --> 00:04:04,053
Oh, that's disgusting.
75
00:04:04,118 --> 00:04:06,139
No, it's okay.
76
00:04:06,219 --> 00:04:08,516
It landed
on the detergent box.
77
00:04:08,570 --> 00:04:09,763
Here.
78
00:04:09,828 --> 00:04:11,204
You go buy yourself
a fresh doughnut
79
00:04:11,284 --> 00:04:13,601
or booze, crack,
whatever eases the pain.
80
00:04:13,670 --> 00:04:15,148
Just move it along.
81
00:04:15,212 --> 00:04:19,199
Uh, you think I'm homeless.
Oh, no, no, no.
82
00:04:19,269 --> 00:04:20,810
No, I live here.
83
00:04:22,639 --> 00:04:24,832
I-I can prove it.
84
00:04:24,905 --> 00:04:27,471
I know exactly
what's in this garbage bag.
85
00:04:27,546 --> 00:04:30,332
Um, empty carton of eggs,
coffee grinds,
86
00:04:30,403 --> 00:04:31,721
shampoo bottle...
87
00:04:31,793 --> 00:04:33,682
Wart removal cream?
88
00:04:35,611 --> 00:04:38,498
You're right. I'm homeless.
89
00:04:39,885 --> 00:04:43,367
Susan Mayer. Oh.
90
00:04:43,427 --> 00:04:46,228
It's all cleared up.
91
00:04:46,303 --> 00:04:49,907
Mm. Edie Britt. I just
moved in down the street.
92
00:04:49,971 --> 00:04:52,568
Oh, yeah.
I saw the moving van. Welcome.
93
00:04:52,640 --> 00:04:54,119
Thanks.
94
00:04:54,186 --> 00:04:56,312
So is it just you,
or do you have a family?
95
00:04:56,382 --> 00:04:58,775
I have a son.
He lives with his dad.
96
00:04:58,852 --> 00:05:01,884
It's a long story. I'll tell you
one day over a margarita.
97
00:05:03,906 --> 00:05:06,911
You wanna invite me in
for a margarita?
98
00:05:06,978 --> 00:05:09,848
How about coffee?
I just put on a pot.
99
00:05:09,912 --> 00:05:11,204
Great.
100
00:05:11,277 --> 00:05:13,704
You can fill me in on all
of the neighborhood gossip,
101
00:05:13,759 --> 00:05:15,689
starting with the redhead
across the street
102
00:05:15,753 --> 00:05:18,387
with the muffin basket.
That's a robot, right?
103
00:05:18,461 --> 00:05:20,135
Funny and likes to gossip.
104
00:05:20,221 --> 00:05:23,217
We're gonna get along just fine.
- Yes, we are.
105
00:05:25,842 --> 00:05:28,707
Wait. Stop.
106
00:05:28,778 --> 00:05:31,841
Could we just rest
for a second?
107
00:05:31,911 --> 00:05:34,951
We've only gone four blocks.
108
00:05:35,015 --> 00:05:37,682
Okay, I lied.
109
00:05:37,749 --> 00:05:39,166
I hate running.
110
00:05:39,244 --> 00:05:41,196
Well, why didn't you
say something?
111
00:05:41,255 --> 00:05:42,700
We've been doing this for a week.
112
00:05:42,701 --> 00:05:44,670
Because we were
starting to become friends,
113
00:05:44,741 --> 00:05:47,298
and you like to run,
and I like to...
114
00:05:47,362 --> 00:05:49,556
sit and...
115
00:05:49,627 --> 00:05:51,551
one of us had to give.
116
00:05:51,611 --> 00:05:54,384
Hi, Susan!
- Oh, hi, Helen, Ed.
117
00:05:54,444 --> 00:05:55,931
I would have introduced you,
118
00:05:56,005 --> 00:05:58,091
but once Helen starts talking,
she doesn't shut up.
119
00:05:58,164 --> 00:06:01,904
Right. Ed told me that.
- Oh, you met Ed?
120
00:06:01,975 --> 00:06:05,279
Oh, yeah. I've gotten
to know him quite well.
121
00:06:05,347 --> 00:06:06,561
Yeah?
122
00:06:06,636 --> 00:06:08,584
We're kinda...
123
00:06:08,657 --> 00:06:10,036
doing it.
124
00:06:10,105 --> 00:06:12,198
Doing what?
125
00:06:12,262 --> 00:06:14,861
It.
126
00:06:14,938 --> 00:06:16,706
Ed is married.
127
00:06:16,785 --> 00:06:19,957
Yeah, I'm a naughty girl.
128
00:06:20,030 --> 00:06:23,499
No, you're being immoral.
129
00:06:23,573 --> 00:06:25,691
You're committing adultery.
130
00:06:25,763 --> 00:06:30,419
Actually, Ed's committing
adultery. I'm just getting laid.
131
00:06:30,488 --> 00:06:32,719
You know,
forget I ever mentioned it.
132
00:06:32,782 --> 00:06:34,772
I can't forget
something like this.
133
00:06:34,838 --> 00:06:37,872
Helen is my very good friend.
- I thought you just said that she was--
134
00:06:37,936 --> 00:06:40,878
She is annoying, and I hide
when she knocks on my door,
135
00:06:40,952 --> 00:06:44,959
but she does not deserve for you
to be wrecking her marriage.
136
00:06:45,028 --> 00:06:46,481
Where are you going?
137
00:06:46,537 --> 00:06:48,104
Home.
138
00:06:48,163 --> 00:06:50,763
Oh, so you're not
gonna be my friend anymore?
139
00:06:50,827 --> 00:06:54,105
I don't think so.
140
00:06:54,172 --> 00:06:55,634
I thought
you didn't like running.
141
00:06:55,686 --> 00:06:58,258
Well, it depends
on what I'm running away from!
142
00:07:02,551 --> 00:07:05,001
Hi. I'm the whore
that lives down the street.
143
00:07:05,103 --> 00:07:06,869
Could I borrow
a cup of condoms?
144
00:07:06,923 --> 00:07:09,250
A cup? Are you sure
that'll be enough?
145
00:07:09,322 --> 00:07:11,554
Look, I know
that you don't like me,
146
00:07:11,627 --> 00:07:14,729
but I am here
to do you a favor anyway.
147
00:07:16,238 --> 00:07:18,202
I was out to dinner
last night,
148
00:07:18,262 --> 00:07:20,735
and I saw your husband
with another woman.
149
00:07:20,736 --> 00:07:21,195
Really?
150
00:07:21,263 --> 00:07:23,398
I feel bad saying it,
151
00:07:23,471 --> 00:07:27,787
but if I were in your shoes,
I would want to know.
152
00:07:27,848 --> 00:07:29,393
You're welcome.
153
00:07:29,464 --> 00:07:32,228
Oh, I get it.
154
00:07:32,304 --> 00:07:36,282
So you feel I judged you,
and for revenge,
155
00:07:36,357 --> 00:07:38,784
you're trying to make me
insecure about my marriage.
156
00:07:38,845 --> 00:07:40,774
If I wanted revenge,
157
00:07:40,847 --> 00:07:44,112
I would have joined them
and made it a threesome.
158
00:07:44,176 --> 00:07:46,099
You know,
Karl would never cheat,
159
00:07:46,169 --> 00:07:49,584
And the woman he was with--
Brandi, his secretary,
160
00:07:49,642 --> 00:07:51,858
and he took her out
for her birthday.
161
00:07:51,944 --> 00:07:53,857
Oh, the old
"I'm taking my secretary
162
00:07:53,932 --> 00:07:55,913
out for her birthday"
routine.
163
00:07:55,991 --> 00:07:59,293
Hmm. Nice tip of the hat
to the classics.
164
00:07:59,362 --> 00:08:02,669
Okay, well,
since you're on this moral roll,
165
00:08:02,739 --> 00:08:04,660
why don't we walk
over to Helen's?
166
00:08:04,726 --> 00:08:06,647
and I will introduce you.
We can have some tea,
167
00:08:06,728 --> 00:08:08,640
And then you two
could swap stories
168
00:08:08,714 --> 00:08:10,592
about
Ed's favorite positions.
169
00:08:10,676 --> 00:08:14,541
What I do and what Brandi's
doing is completely different.
170
00:08:14,603 --> 00:08:15,646
How?
171
00:08:15,725 --> 00:08:19,096
I'm not looking to break up
anyone's marriage.
172
00:08:19,164 --> 00:08:21,326
I'm in it for a little fun,
some free meals
173
00:08:21,403 --> 00:08:24,325
and to help an unhappy man
through his midlife crisis.
174
00:08:24,396 --> 00:08:29,054
Wow. You're just a giver.
175
00:08:29,117 --> 00:08:30,677
Fine.
176
00:08:30,743 --> 00:08:32,933
Use all of your energy
judging me
177
00:08:33,007 --> 00:08:34,925
and ignore the real problem.
178
00:08:34,991 --> 00:08:37,829
But let me
tell you something.
179
00:08:37,890 --> 00:08:39,822
This is my area of expertise,
180
00:08:39,896 --> 00:08:41,842
and I saw the look
in that woman's eyes.
181
00:08:41,915 --> 00:08:45,553
She's not in it for the free
meals. She's in it for keeps.
182
00:08:49,024 --> 00:08:50,718
You should leave now.
183
00:08:50,777 --> 00:08:52,668
You know, Susan,
184
00:08:52,739 --> 00:08:55,282
I'm trying
to help my neighbor out.
185
00:08:55,335 --> 00:08:59,992
I thought it was
the moral thing to do.
186
00:09:03,846 --> 00:09:05,761
Three weeks later,
I found Brandi's bra
187
00:09:05,839 --> 00:09:09,674
in Karl's glove compartment,
and, well, you know the rest.
188
00:09:09,748 --> 00:09:12,752
Say what you want about Edie,
she really understood men.
189
00:09:12,812 --> 00:09:15,981
I should hope so.
After all those years of research...
190
00:09:17,904 --> 00:09:19,839
I can't help thinking about
191
00:09:19,899 --> 00:09:23,143
all the times Edie and I
sniped at each other.
192
00:09:23,217 --> 00:09:25,133
We could have been
good friends.
193
00:09:25,203 --> 00:09:28,482
Well, if she knew what
you're about to do for her,
194
00:09:28,536 --> 00:09:30,642
she'd forgive you
for everything.
195
00:09:38,238 --> 00:09:40,666
Okay, my hour's up.
Someone else hold Edie now.
196
00:09:40,743 --> 00:09:42,732
Mm.
- I'll take her.
197
00:09:49,068 --> 00:09:51,000
Kinda looks like cat litter.
198
00:09:51,057 --> 00:09:53,428
Lynette, don't look at Edie.
199
00:09:53,481 --> 00:09:56,925
Or what, I'll turn to stone?
She's all rough and gritty.
200
00:09:57,005 --> 00:09:59,909
Uh, Gaby, before we learn
what Edie tastes like...
201
00:09:59,961 --> 00:10:01,385
I got it.
202
00:10:01,463 --> 00:10:04,058
I think a little more reverence
for the dead is in order.
203
00:10:04,108 --> 00:10:06,076
Oh, please.
We're talking about Edie.
204
00:10:06,141 --> 00:10:08,769
A little more irreverence
is what we need.
205
00:10:08,846 --> 00:10:11,505
Give it.
206
00:10:17,678 --> 00:10:22,096
Do you guys remember when you
took turns driving me to chemo?
207
00:10:22,169 --> 00:10:25,205
Well,
none of you did it like Edie.
208
00:10:26,657 --> 00:10:28,108
Hey, Lynette.
209
00:10:28,183 --> 00:10:30,638
Hey.
210
00:10:30,708 --> 00:10:31,787
How you feelin'?
211
00:10:31,852 --> 00:10:33,435
Eh, same.
212
00:10:33,505 --> 00:10:35,561
Well, here's the DVD
you asked for.
213
00:10:35,637 --> 00:10:38,800
Thanks. I'll watch it during
chemo if I'm not too tired.
214
00:10:38,873 --> 00:10:41,605
Here we go.
215
00:10:41,677 --> 00:10:43,936
Oh, hi, Edie.
216
00:10:44,006 --> 00:10:45,924
Hi. Ugh. What is that?
217
00:10:45,998 --> 00:10:48,254
It's a health shake
of fermented brown rice,
218
00:10:48,330 --> 00:10:49,810
and for her entrée,
219
00:10:49,881 --> 00:10:52,974
a salad of radish,
burdock root and Bok Choy.
220
00:10:53,044 --> 00:10:55,438
Mmm. What's for dessert,
waterboarding?
221
00:10:55,515 --> 00:10:57,257
Thanks.
222
00:10:57,335 --> 00:10:59,184
I can't get comfortable.
223
00:10:59,253 --> 00:11:02,056
Could you fluff my pillows?
- Of course.
224
00:11:03,816 --> 00:11:05,765
Well, I've got errands to run,
225
00:11:05,832 --> 00:11:07,430
and I'll be back to
drive you to chemo.
226
00:11:07,431 --> 00:11:09,308
Before you go, would
you put my socks back on?
227
00:11:09,376 --> 00:11:12,686
My feet are cold again.
228
00:11:12,748 --> 00:11:15,448
Oh, of course.
229
00:11:15,522 --> 00:11:18,257
Katherine,
you have got stuff to do.
230
00:11:18,328 --> 00:11:20,612
Why don't I take her
to chemo?
231
00:11:20,687 --> 00:11:22,265
It's fine.
232
00:11:22,336 --> 00:11:23,788
Okay.
233
00:11:23,865 --> 00:11:25,442
See you tomorrow then.
234
00:11:25,512 --> 00:11:26,898
Bye.
235
00:11:30,837 --> 00:11:32,502
Okay, where's your coat?
236
00:11:32,561 --> 00:11:35,273
Why? Chemo's not until 5:00.
237
00:11:35,325 --> 00:11:39,455
Yeah, I've gotta make
a little stop on the way.
238
00:11:45,053 --> 00:11:48,050
Edie!
- Whoo!
239
00:11:48,120 --> 00:11:49,577
Been here before?
240
00:11:49,643 --> 00:11:51,874
A couple of times.
You're gonna love it. Hey!
241
00:11:51,927 --> 00:11:53,862
Love it? I have cancer.
242
00:11:53,918 --> 00:11:56,858
I probably shouldn't even use
the ladies' room in this place.
243
00:11:56,928 --> 00:11:59,257
Oh, there isn't a ladies' room,
so that's not a problem.
244
00:11:59,323 --> 00:12:01,207
Um, I...
245
00:12:01,278 --> 00:12:04,479
Edie, I have chemo
in half an hour.
246
00:12:04,543 --> 00:12:08,428
Fine. Then we better start drinking.
- I'm not supposed to drink.
247
00:12:08,500 --> 00:12:11,445
And they're not supposed to do
tattoos in the kitchen,
248
00:12:11,512 --> 00:12:14,448
but I have a bald eagle
on my ass that says otherwise.
249
00:12:14,505 --> 00:12:16,466
Two tequila shooters!
250
00:12:16,533 --> 00:12:17,226
Hey, Edie!
251
00:12:17,227 --> 00:12:20,273
Reggie! Oh, I thought
you were in Florida.
252
00:12:20,353 --> 00:12:23,310
Nah. That was just a body
they identified as me.
253
00:12:23,383 --> 00:12:26,556
Oh. Reggie,
this is my friend Lynette.
254
00:12:26,617 --> 00:12:28,950
I'm trying to cheer her up
a little.
255
00:12:29,019 --> 00:12:31,217
Right on.
You wanna shoot some stick?
256
00:12:31,274 --> 00:12:32,322
Uh...
257
00:12:32,388 --> 00:12:33,840
No, thanks.
258
00:12:33,914 --> 00:12:36,678
Oh, come on.
You can totally take him.
259
00:12:36,755 --> 00:12:40,394
No, I can't. Uh, see?
Cancer.
260
00:12:40,455 --> 00:12:43,060
Oh. No sweat.
261
00:12:46,495 --> 00:12:49,033
I'll play you one-handed.
262
00:12:51,151 --> 00:12:53,789
Can you excuse us
for one second?
263
00:12:56,922 --> 00:13:00,665
I need to go to chemo. I have--
- Cancer. Yeah, I heard.
264
00:13:02,633 --> 00:13:04,651
And what do you want
from me?
265
00:13:04,714 --> 00:13:07,456
I want you to fluff
your own pillows.
266
00:13:07,532 --> 00:13:09,844
You need to start
fighting this thing.
267
00:13:09,916 --> 00:13:11,778
I'm doing the best I can.
268
00:13:11,839 --> 00:13:13,291
Oh, not even close.
269
00:13:13,359 --> 00:13:17,247
Hell, Lynette, you--you are
the strongest person I know.
270
00:13:17,313 --> 00:13:21,052
You're even stronger than me,
and that's saying something.
271
00:13:24,231 --> 00:13:26,220
Now...
272
00:13:26,292 --> 00:13:29,764
I may be a little out of line
bringing you here,
273
00:13:29,836 --> 00:13:32,557
But you need to remember
who you are.
274
00:13:32,637 --> 00:13:34,278
Screw cancer.
275
00:13:34,353 --> 00:13:38,189
You are Lynette Scavo.
276
00:13:42,070 --> 00:13:44,702
Two tequilas.
277
00:13:58,944 --> 00:14:03,741
Now... where's that
one-armed friend of yours?
278
00:14:03,819 --> 00:14:07,384
I'm--wanna shoot some stick.
279
00:14:14,471 --> 00:14:17,706
Wow. It sounds like she gave you
just what you needed.
280
00:14:17,779 --> 00:14:20,177
Good for Edie.
- She never let me forget it either.
281
00:14:20,246 --> 00:14:21,901
She always insisted
282
00:14:21,972 --> 00:14:24,391
it was the tequila shooters
that killed the cancer.
283
00:14:25,200 --> 00:14:27,391
Oh, what the hell is that?
284
00:14:27,462 --> 00:14:29,762
Oh, not now. We have a flat.
285
00:14:29,815 --> 00:14:33,166
Maybe it's a sign we're not
supposed to do this today.
286
00:14:33,238 --> 00:14:35,259
Nice try.
287
00:14:36,852 --> 00:14:39,471
We don't have time for this.
288
00:14:39,548 --> 00:14:41,950
Anybody know
how to change a tire?
289
00:14:52,204 --> 00:14:56,156
You want to hand me that cross wrench?
- Do you wanna tell me what that is?
290
00:14:56,231 --> 00:14:57,685
It's the T-shaped dealie
291
00:14:57,740 --> 00:15:01,158
I'm gonna whack you with
if you don't hand it over.
292
00:15:01,217 --> 00:15:03,177
You know,
Edie used to live around here
293
00:15:03,254 --> 00:15:06,353
when she moved away
from Wisteria Lane.
294
00:15:06,427 --> 00:15:09,460
You mean when you gals gave her the boot.
- Less yakkin', more jackin'.
295
00:15:09,531 --> 00:15:12,450
Bree, how did you know
where she lived?
296
00:15:12,527 --> 00:15:15,834
Um, I ran into her once,
unexpectedly...
297
00:15:15,898 --> 00:15:19,486
in a place
I never thought I'd be.
298
00:15:19,541 --> 00:15:21,435
Bree Hodge.
299
00:15:23,155 --> 00:15:25,146
Follow me.
I'll get you situated,
300
00:15:25,211 --> 00:15:27,276
and I'll bring
your husband in.
301
00:15:38,684 --> 00:15:40,263
Is that the visitors' room?
302
00:15:40,338 --> 00:15:42,083
Yeah. Why?
303
00:15:42,161 --> 00:15:45,506
You don't happen to have
a private room, do you?
304
00:15:48,274 --> 00:15:50,216
You mean, like an upgrade,
305
00:15:50,296 --> 00:15:52,644
something with a couch
and softer lighting?
306
00:15:52,714 --> 00:15:56,125
That would be lovely.
307
00:15:56,187 --> 00:15:58,829
Oh.
You were being sarcastic.
308
00:15:58,887 --> 00:16:01,500
Yes, ma'am.
Are you ready to--
309
00:16:01,551 --> 00:16:04,426
Oh, not, uh, just yet.
310
00:16:04,490 --> 00:16:08,134
It's not a bad idea,
having an upgrade available.
311
00:16:08,207 --> 00:16:11,182
I bet that's a perk people
would be willing to pay for.
312
00:16:11,240 --> 00:16:13,299
Ma'am, it's a prison.
313
00:16:13,379 --> 00:16:16,777
The only perk we offer is
a cavity search.
314
00:16:16,840 --> 00:16:19,105
Um...
315
00:16:19,171 --> 00:16:21,434
To be honest,
I-I'm not feeling up to this.
316
00:16:21,510 --> 00:16:24,706
I'm gonna have
to come back another day.
317
00:16:24,782 --> 00:16:26,630
Fine. He's got another visitor
scheduled anyway,
318
00:16:26,700 --> 00:16:29,109
so I don't even have to
tell him you were here.
319
00:16:29,110 --> 00:16:30,213
Another visitor? Who?
320
00:16:30,271 --> 00:16:32,672
Some lady.
She visits him every week.
321
00:16:32,736 --> 00:16:34,595
Every week?
What's her name?
322
00:16:34,658 --> 00:16:37,088
I can't give you that.
323
00:16:37,161 --> 00:16:41,031
If she's visiting my husband,
I think I have a right to know.
324
00:16:41,115 --> 00:16:44,484
Ma'am, I'm sorry,
but I cannot give you her name.
325
00:16:44,546 --> 00:16:46,717
Really?
326
00:16:46,778 --> 00:16:51,125
Because I would consider that
a perk worth paying for.
327
00:16:57,409 --> 00:16:59,536
Well, well.
328
00:16:59,610 --> 00:17:01,527
What are you doing here?
329
00:17:01,598 --> 00:17:03,812
I wanted to see you.
330
00:17:03,883 --> 00:17:06,454
And you didn't
bring muffins?
331
00:17:06,528 --> 00:17:09,658
It isn't
that kind of visit.
332
00:17:14,588 --> 00:17:17,722
No muffins, no small talk.
333
00:17:17,798 --> 00:17:20,787
Should I be scared
or grateful?
334
00:17:20,860 --> 00:17:23,626
I stopped by
the prison today.
335
00:17:23,695 --> 00:17:26,393
The guard tells me
you've been visiting Orson--
336
00:17:26,462 --> 00:17:29,198
Sometimes twice a week,
she said.
337
00:17:29,273 --> 00:17:32,430
Oh. Who knew lady prison guards
could be so chatty?
338
00:17:32,502 --> 00:17:34,634
What are you up to, Edie?
339
00:17:34,690 --> 00:17:36,820
I'm not up to anything,
you redheaded ice cube.
340
00:17:36,893 --> 00:17:39,327
He's 15 minutes away.
341
00:17:39,394 --> 00:17:42,558
And quite frankly,
I feel sorry for him.
342
00:17:42,626 --> 00:17:45,930
After all, I know what it's like
to be exiled from suburbia.
343
00:17:45,997 --> 00:17:48,976
So you're not...
344
00:17:49,038 --> 00:17:51,029
Trying to start up something?
345
00:17:51,090 --> 00:17:54,231
He's in jail.
346
00:17:54,302 --> 00:17:57,885
My boobs are impressive,
but they can't bend iron bars.
347
00:17:57,944 --> 00:18:00,376
Well...
348
00:18:00,445 --> 00:18:03,954
Thank you for...
checking in on him
349
00:18:04,018 --> 00:18:07,169
and for answering
my question.
350
00:18:09,792 --> 00:18:13,471
I have a question.
351
00:18:13,545 --> 00:18:16,339
Why aren't you visiting him?
352
00:18:16,406 --> 00:18:18,638
Oh, well,
my schedule is just unreal,
353
00:18:18,698 --> 00:18:21,733
what with the catering company
and looking after Benjamin.
354
00:18:21,804 --> 00:18:24,401
Yeah, well, we're all busy.
355
00:18:24,472 --> 00:18:26,429
Come on.
356
00:18:26,508 --> 00:18:28,520
Why haven't you
been to see him?
357
00:18:33,045 --> 00:18:35,878
That jail is...
358
00:18:35,944 --> 00:18:38,554
it's disgusting.
359
00:18:38,618 --> 00:18:44,887
All those men in cages,
like animals.
360
00:18:44,953 --> 00:18:48,190
Even to step foot in that place
is humiliating.
361
00:18:48,262 --> 00:18:52,283
That man
went to jail for you.
362
00:18:52,354 --> 00:18:55,754
Do you have any idea
how much he must love you?
363
00:18:57,551 --> 00:18:59,666
I do.
364
00:18:59,728 --> 00:19:03,893
Then why can't you suck it up
once a month and go and say hi?
365
00:19:03,959 --> 00:19:08,445
Try to help him get through
this living nightmare.
366
00:19:08,508 --> 00:19:10,500
Why can't you do that?
367
00:19:13,364 --> 00:19:17,587
Now as I think about it,
368
00:19:17,651 --> 00:19:19,174
don't visit him.
369
00:19:19,250 --> 00:19:21,802
He can do so much better
than you.
370
00:19:52,778 --> 00:19:56,265
So... how are you doing?
371
00:19:56,363 --> 00:19:58,918
How do you think?
372
00:20:02,601 --> 00:20:05,571
You're right.
I shouldn't have asked.
373
00:20:05,637 --> 00:20:08,435
I know it's horrible here.
374
00:20:08,507 --> 00:20:10,974
How would you know?
375
00:20:11,048 --> 00:20:12,556
You've never been.
376
00:20:14,279 --> 00:20:16,266
You have every right
to hate me.
377
00:20:18,839 --> 00:20:22,040
There's no need
to be melodramatic.
378
00:20:22,103 --> 00:20:24,368
I meant for asking you
to come here,
379
00:20:24,446 --> 00:20:26,557
for insisting
you turn yourself in.
380
00:20:28,766 --> 00:20:28,926
Oh.
381
00:20:28,927 --> 00:20:32,236
Now that I see this place,
I don't know what I was thinking.
382
00:20:32,298 --> 00:20:33,750
You were thinking
383
00:20:33,817 --> 00:20:36,246
I needed to take responsibility
for what I did,
384
00:20:36,323 --> 00:20:37,726
and you were right.
385
00:20:37,798 --> 00:20:41,654
But still, asking you to make
this sacrifice and not...
386
00:20:41,713 --> 00:20:44,349
ever...
387
00:20:44,419 --> 00:20:46,072
coming to see you...
388
00:20:52,408 --> 00:20:55,245
How can you ever forgive me?
389
00:20:57,946 --> 00:21:00,037
Just be there
when I get out.
390
00:21:14,111 --> 00:21:18,463
I never told you about that
because... I was embarrassed.
391
00:21:18,528 --> 00:21:21,459
Yeah, Edie Britt shamed you
into being a better human being.
392
00:21:21,543 --> 00:21:23,693
That is embarrassing.
393
00:21:25,179 --> 00:21:27,097
All right, ladies,
we're ready to ride.
394
00:21:27,168 --> 00:21:29,094
Good. We got some ground
to make up.
395
00:21:29,159 --> 00:21:32,057
I was hoping we would be able
to get there before dark.
396
00:21:32,142 --> 00:21:34,092
How do you think he'll
react when we tell him?
397
00:21:34,093 --> 00:21:35,129
How do you think?
398
00:21:39,972 --> 00:21:41,972
I never thought Edie
would be cremated.
399
00:21:42,160 --> 00:21:43,582
I figured she'd wanna be
400
00:21:43,653 --> 00:21:45,912
pumped full of chemicals
and preserved.
401
00:21:45,968 --> 00:21:49,211
Isn't that what she did
for the last 15 years?
402
00:21:49,286 --> 00:21:51,574
My theory--
Edie knew if she was buried,
403
00:21:51,640 --> 00:21:54,572
her true date of birth
would be carved into a tombstone
404
00:21:54,651 --> 00:21:55,755
for all the world to see.
405
00:21:55,756 --> 00:21:57,610
You really think
she spent a lot of time
406
00:21:57,693 --> 00:21:59,196
thinking about her death?
407
00:21:59,268 --> 00:22:02,812
Yeah, I do.
408
00:22:04,503 --> 00:22:06,765
I spent a night with her
409
00:22:06,833 --> 00:22:08,985
right after Carlos
and I got divorced.
410
00:22:08,986 --> 00:22:11,325
Is this too red? I think
I need something pinker.
411
00:22:11,379 --> 00:22:12,834
It's fine. Hurry up.
412
00:22:12,911 --> 00:22:17,322
I want to get to the club while
this bikini wax is still fresh.
413
00:22:17,396 --> 00:22:19,314
This is gonna be fun.
414
00:22:19,380 --> 00:22:22,318
I can't believe we've never
gone out on the town together.
415
00:22:22,382 --> 00:22:24,311
Well, we've never been single
together before.
416
00:22:24,386 --> 00:22:27,322
Oh, I feel so sorry for all
those other girls in the bar.
417
00:22:27,376 --> 00:22:29,069
Oh, so do I.
418
00:22:29,144 --> 00:22:34,298
To be fair, we should
probably walk in backwards.
419
00:22:34,362 --> 00:22:37,769
Oh, no, that won't work.
420
00:22:37,841 --> 00:22:39,462
We're an unstoppable team.
421
00:22:39,530 --> 00:22:42,524
Mm, the hottest chicks
on Wisteria Lane.
422
00:22:42,598 --> 00:22:44,562
Oh, be nice.
423
00:22:44,629 --> 00:22:47,082
There are lots of
attractive women on the street.
424
00:22:47,154 --> 00:22:48,371
Like who?
425
00:22:48,437 --> 00:22:50,091
How about Bree?
426
00:22:50,158 --> 00:22:52,353
Uh, with that hair color,
427
00:22:52,425 --> 00:22:54,343
you could stick
a red nose on her,
428
00:22:54,420 --> 00:22:56,322
and she could join
the circus.
429
00:22:56,402 --> 00:22:57,886
Lynette's beautiful.
430
00:22:57,952 --> 00:22:59,578
Mm, for a baby factory.
431
00:22:59,638 --> 00:23:02,543
And Susan?
- We're the hottest, okay?
432
00:23:04,902 --> 00:23:06,996
Wow.
433
00:23:07,060 --> 00:23:09,872
Too much?
434
00:23:09,933 --> 00:23:12,566
No, it's great.
435
00:23:12,637 --> 00:23:14,630
All right.
Come on. Let's go.
436
00:23:24,922 --> 00:23:27,251
Wow! You were right
about this place.
437
00:23:27,323 --> 00:23:31,194
Told ya. A lot of hotties,
very few "notties."
438
00:23:31,259 --> 00:23:32,815
Ooh.
439
00:23:32,881 --> 00:23:34,293
Ladies, this is
440
00:23:34,366 --> 00:23:37,373
from the gentleman
at the end of the bar.
441
00:23:37,444 --> 00:23:39,467
Oh, and I just sat down.
442
00:23:39,533 --> 00:23:41,851
Well,
that's a personal best.
443
00:23:41,925 --> 00:23:43,978
Actually, the drink's for her.
444
00:23:44,050 --> 00:23:47,059
Oh.
445
00:23:49,054 --> 00:23:51,483
Oh!
- It's pretty dark in here.
446
00:23:51,550 --> 00:23:53,469
He probably didn't get
a good look at me.
447
00:23:53,533 --> 00:23:55,699
Oh, Edie,
don't take it personally.
448
00:23:55,769 --> 00:23:57,212
We're just different types.
449
00:23:57,277 --> 00:24:00,249
You're right. Some like
tall, blonde and sexy,
450
00:24:00,314 --> 00:24:02,519
And some men like...
451
00:24:02,578 --> 00:24:04,371
that.
452
00:24:04,438 --> 00:24:06,498
Now, now, Edie.
Don't be snarky.
453
00:24:06,560 --> 00:24:09,121
We're both hot, remember?
454
00:24:09,196 --> 00:24:12,066
Although, apparently,
I'm just a little bit hotter.
455
00:24:12,133 --> 00:24:14,729
Well,
one guy might think so.
456
00:24:14,786 --> 00:24:16,716
One guy
who's evidently intimidated
457
00:24:16,780 --> 00:24:19,556
by full-sized
womanly breasts.
458
00:24:19,615 --> 00:24:22,991
Hmm. Yes, I guess I am
a little on the small side.
459
00:24:23,061 --> 00:24:26,093
That's the drawback
to having ones that are real.
460
00:24:26,164 --> 00:24:29,266
What are you talking about?
These are real.
461
00:24:29,341 --> 00:24:31,775
Oh, Edie, come on.
When you jump up and down,
462
00:24:31,841 --> 00:24:33,759
the room moves more
than your boobs.
463
00:24:35,412 --> 00:24:39,125
Well, someone obviously has
a chip on her shoulder.
464
00:24:39,225 --> 00:24:41,110
I'd reach down
and knock it off,
465
00:24:41,187 --> 00:24:43,742
but I can't go down that low.
466
00:24:43,815 --> 00:24:47,354
Okay, you really think
you're hotter an me?
467
00:24:47,427 --> 00:24:51,942
Let's just say that I have more
of what men want.
468
00:24:52,012 --> 00:24:55,729
Yeah? Well, I have a vodka soda
here that says otherwise.
469
00:24:55,795 --> 00:24:58,732
Ooh! So he bought you
one drink--
470
00:24:58,794 --> 00:25:01,020
A well drink, I might add.
471
00:25:01,093 --> 00:25:04,096
Well, it's one more
than you got.
472
00:25:06,017 --> 00:25:10,579
Are you saying that I can't get
a man to buy me a cocktail?
473
00:25:10,638 --> 00:25:14,759
Sure, you can,
just not as many as me.
474
00:25:14,825 --> 00:25:16,919
One hour.
475
00:25:16,993 --> 00:25:20,660
Whoever gets the most
swizzle sticks by the end wins.
476
00:25:24,606 --> 00:25:27,788
See ya in an hour, loser.
477
00:25:31,123 --> 00:25:35,048
# I know what boys
like, we know what guys want #
478
00:25:35,108 --> 00:25:39,565
# I know what boys like,
we know what guys like #
479
00:25:39,632 --> 00:25:41,487
# I make them want me #
480
00:25:41,562 --> 00:25:43,717
# I like to tease them #
481
00:25:43,784 --> 00:25:45,737
# they want to touch me #
482
00:25:45,803 --> 00:25:47,892
# I never let them #
483
00:25:47,966 --> 00:25:50,000
# I know what boys like #
484
00:25:50,054 --> 00:25:52,523
# we know what guys want #
485
00:25:52,595 --> 00:25:55,018
# I know what boys like #
486
00:25:55,097 --> 00:25:57,312
# boys like #
487
00:25:57,381 --> 00:26:00,631
# boys like me #
488
00:26:00,684 --> 00:26:01,706
# sucker #
489
00:26:01,773 --> 00:26:03,863
# I know what boys like #
490
00:26:03,928 --> 00:26:05,846
# we know what guys want #
491
00:26:05,922 --> 00:26:08,040
# na-na na-na na #
492
00:26:08,111 --> 00:26:10,783
# na-na na-na na #
493
00:26:15,871 --> 00:26:20,057
Count 'em and weep, Solis.
494
00:26:21,579 --> 00:26:23,932
Well,
I guess I could do that.
495
00:26:25,631 --> 00:26:28,421
Or I could do this.
496
00:26:33,652 --> 00:26:35,811
Ah.
497
00:26:35,883 --> 00:26:37,816
I should make
some kind of speech.
498
00:26:37,875 --> 00:26:40,130
But I think it's enough. We both
know I crushed you, right?
499
00:26:40,202 --> 00:26:42,026
Now if you'll excuse me,
500
00:26:42,085 --> 00:26:46,408
swizzle stick number 17
has a yacht and giant feet.
501
00:26:47,962 --> 00:26:50,352
Whoo-hoo!
502
00:27:02,610 --> 00:27:04,710
What the hell
were you thinking,
503
00:27:04,767 --> 00:27:07,909
abandoning me
at a singles bar?
504
00:27:10,511 --> 00:27:11,829
I'm sorry.
505
00:27:11,894 --> 00:27:15,397
I just needed to be
by myself for while.
506
00:27:15,462 --> 00:27:17,014
Why?
507
00:27:17,090 --> 00:27:19,005
Don't tell me
you're depressed
508
00:27:19,081 --> 00:27:21,001
because you lost
some stupid game.
509
00:27:21,065 --> 00:27:22,525
I'm not depressed.
510
00:27:22,595 --> 00:27:25,252
I'm surprised.
511
00:27:25,317 --> 00:27:27,816
It's going by so quickly.
512
00:27:27,891 --> 00:27:29,367
What is?
513
00:27:31,091 --> 00:27:33,529
My youth.
514
00:27:33,595 --> 00:27:35,274
The harder I try
to hold on to it,
515
00:27:35,348 --> 00:27:37,262
the more it just...
516
00:27:37,334 --> 00:27:39,802
slips through my fingers.
517
00:27:39,865 --> 00:27:42,795
And all the makeup
and dim lighting in the world
518
00:27:42,869 --> 00:27:44,791
can't seem to stop it.
519
00:27:44,856 --> 00:27:48,166
Oh, please.
You're gorgeous.
520
00:27:48,235 --> 00:27:51,470
And you are going
to stay that way forever.
521
00:27:51,536 --> 00:27:52,919
Hmm.
522
00:27:52,991 --> 00:27:54,952
That's the tricky part.
523
00:27:55,027 --> 00:27:57,242
I'm not gonna be old.
524
00:27:57,308 --> 00:27:58,600
What?
525
00:27:58,667 --> 00:28:02,406
Ever since I was a child,
526
00:28:02,476 --> 00:28:05,244
I've known that I was
never gonna see 50.
527
00:28:05,304 --> 00:28:06,895
Oh, that's ridiculous.
528
00:28:06,970 --> 00:28:09,062
No, it's true.
529
00:28:09,117 --> 00:28:11,076
As far back
as I can remember,
530
00:28:11,143 --> 00:28:14,012
a voice in my head said,
"live it up today,
531
00:28:14,082 --> 00:28:16,991
'cause you're not gonna have
a lot of tomorrows."
532
00:28:17,052 --> 00:28:18,502
You do realize
533
00:28:18,577 --> 00:28:22,186
there's medication designed
to get rid of those voices?
534
00:28:22,248 --> 00:28:25,826
It's not a bad thing,
Gaby.
535
00:28:25,901 --> 00:28:29,273
It's actually a gift.
536
00:28:29,336 --> 00:28:31,362
I...
537
00:28:31,429 --> 00:28:32,840
appreciate my life
538
00:28:32,916 --> 00:28:37,434
in a way
that most people don't.
539
00:28:37,499 --> 00:28:42,018
I just didn't expect it
to go by this fast.
540
00:28:42,092 --> 00:28:44,445
That's all.
541
00:28:46,822 --> 00:28:48,266
Well, you know what?
542
00:28:48,331 --> 00:28:52,623
I have a voice inside my head
that says you're wrong.
543
00:28:52,694 --> 00:28:55,932
It tells me
that 50 years from now,
544
00:28:55,999 --> 00:28:58,555
you and I will still be
wearing dresses too tight
545
00:28:58,626 --> 00:29:01,390
and walking in heels too high
546
00:29:01,467 --> 00:29:03,312
and going to bars
547
00:29:03,384 --> 00:29:06,095
where we'll meet old geezers
who'll buy us drinks
548
00:29:06,149 --> 00:29:10,366
with the last of
their Social Security checks.
549
00:29:10,443 --> 00:29:13,279
If you say so.
550
00:29:14,931 --> 00:29:17,087
Now come on.
Let's go to my house.
551
00:29:17,152 --> 00:29:21,398
Let's pop open a bottle of wine
and toast to our future.
552
00:29:21,472 --> 00:29:25,550
Why not?
553
00:29:31,730 --> 00:29:33,380
Isn't that weird?
554
00:29:33,459 --> 00:29:36,117
She knew
she was gonna die young.
555
00:29:39,694 --> 00:29:42,968
What do you mean, you two were
the hottest chicks on the lane?
556
00:29:43,040 --> 00:29:45,975
She called me
a baby factory?
557
00:29:46,033 --> 00:29:47,654
Yeah, Gaby, in hindsight,
558
00:29:47,726 --> 00:29:50,916
maybe you shouldn't have
told that part of the story.
559
00:29:50,917 --> 00:29:51,507
Oh, pfft.
560
00:29:51,569 --> 00:29:53,596
I think we're here.
561
00:30:06,582 --> 00:30:10,635
So are we ready for this?
562
00:30:10,718 --> 00:30:13,039
I don't know.
563
00:30:13,114 --> 00:30:16,544
Can you ever be ready to tell
a boy that his mother is dead?
564
00:30:24,451 --> 00:30:26,550
Hey, Travers.
565
00:30:29,046 --> 00:30:31,604
Remember us?
566
00:30:32,851 --> 00:30:34,369
Sure.
567
00:30:34,440 --> 00:30:36,665
Wow. You brought
the whole neighborhood with you.
568
00:30:38,824 --> 00:30:41,228
Did my mom come with you?
569
00:30:45,875 --> 00:30:47,806
We brought you
some muffins.
570
00:30:47,870 --> 00:30:49,866
You can share them
with your roommates
571
00:30:49,929 --> 00:30:51,957
or maybe a favorite teacher.
572
00:30:54,687 --> 00:30:56,575
What's going on?
573
00:30:56,641 --> 00:30:59,269
Is my mom in trouble
or something?
574
00:31:03,193 --> 00:31:05,181
Come here.
575
00:31:08,796 --> 00:31:12,327
I'm afraid
we have some bad news.
576
00:31:12,395 --> 00:31:15,813
Your mom was
in a very serious accident,
577
00:31:15,884 --> 00:31:19,993
and I am so sorry...
578
00:31:20,066 --> 00:31:21,984
but she passed away.
579
00:31:25,795 --> 00:31:27,279
She died?
580
00:31:33,125 --> 00:31:34,262
When?
581
00:31:34,340 --> 00:31:36,030
A couple of days ago.
582
00:31:36,086 --> 00:31:39,633
We've been trying
to get in touch with your dad,
583
00:31:39,701 --> 00:31:41,181
but he's still
out of the country.
584
00:31:41,253 --> 00:31:43,311
And your mom's new husband's
never met you,
585
00:31:43,369 --> 00:31:46,348
so he thought it would be best
if we told you.
586
00:31:49,560 --> 00:31:50,964
Wow.
587
00:31:52,662 --> 00:31:54,611
If you'd like,
we could give you a moment.
588
00:31:54,683 --> 00:31:57,040
No.
589
00:31:58,701 --> 00:32:00,087
I'm okay.
590
00:32:01,832 --> 00:32:04,972
Well, I have a class.
591
00:32:08,119 --> 00:32:10,281
Uh, I'm sure the school
will understand
592
00:32:10,340 --> 00:32:12,261
if you need
to miss a few days.
593
00:32:12,329 --> 00:32:14,122
I don't need to do that.
594
00:32:14,188 --> 00:32:17,297
I mean, I'm sorry she's dead,
but we weren't very close.
595
00:32:17,373 --> 00:32:19,723
Still, she was your mother.
596
00:32:19,798 --> 00:32:21,719
Technically.
597
00:32:21,784 --> 00:32:23,777
But not a very good one.
598
00:32:23,840 --> 00:32:26,337
Look, Travers,
we're all moms here.
599
00:32:26,400 --> 00:32:28,361
We've all made mistakes
with our kids,
600
00:32:28,425 --> 00:32:30,656
and what we count on is
when they grow up,
601
00:32:30,724 --> 00:32:34,394
they'll forgive us.
- My mom didn't even try to raise me.
602
00:32:34,469 --> 00:32:38,179
I mean, she just handed me
to my father and walked away.
603
00:32:38,250 --> 00:32:40,949
How do you expect me
to forgive that?
604
00:32:41,012 --> 00:32:42,670
Look, I'm sorry.
605
00:32:42,736 --> 00:32:46,624
I don't mean to be rude,
but I'm gonna be late.
606
00:32:46,684 --> 00:32:48,346
Hey! Hey, hey, hey, hey.
Wait a second.
607
00:32:48,411 --> 00:32:51,576
Travers, you need to know
something about your mom,
608
00:32:51,642 --> 00:32:54,771
and I'm gonna tell you.
Now sit down.
609
00:32:54,849 --> 00:32:57,317
I'd only known your mom
about a year
610
00:32:57,395 --> 00:33:00,350
when she came over to my house
this one day.
611
00:33:02,041 --> 00:33:05,815
Hey, Karen!
Your porch light's on.
612
00:33:08,219 --> 00:33:10,341
Whoa. Sitting in your bathrobe
drinking,
613
00:33:10,409 --> 00:33:12,333
and you didn't call me?
614
00:33:12,395 --> 00:33:16,482
I kinda wanted to be alone.
615
00:33:16,544 --> 00:33:18,368
Why?
616
00:33:21,070 --> 00:33:23,570
It's the anniversary
of my son's death.
617
00:33:23,631 --> 00:33:25,767
Ohh.
618
00:33:28,228 --> 00:33:29,853
I'm sorry.
619
00:33:29,918 --> 00:33:32,590
Every year
I think it'll get easier,
620
00:33:32,646 --> 00:33:34,464
and it never does.
621
00:33:36,863 --> 00:33:39,023
Nothing worse
than losing a child.
622
00:33:41,665 --> 00:33:44,995
In a way, you're kinda lucky
you don't have any.
623
00:33:45,075 --> 00:33:47,493
Actually, I do.
624
00:33:47,569 --> 00:33:49,414
What?
625
00:33:49,486 --> 00:33:51,674
Mm, I have a son.
626
00:33:53,375 --> 00:33:56,912
You lived here a year.
How do I not know this?
627
00:33:56,986 --> 00:33:58,972
Because he lives
with his father.
628
00:33:59,027 --> 00:34:02,304
When I got divorced,
I gave him full custody,
629
00:34:02,373 --> 00:34:04,470
so I kinda know
how you feel.
630
00:34:06,254 --> 00:34:09,970
I mean,
we've both lost kids.
631
00:34:10,044 --> 00:34:12,915
No.
632
00:34:12,980 --> 00:34:14,630
I lost a kid.
633
00:34:14,705 --> 00:34:16,551
You gave yours away.
634
00:34:16,622 --> 00:34:19,858
And you have the nerve
to tell me you know how I feel?
635
00:34:19,920 --> 00:34:22,325
I gave him up because
I wanted to protect him.
636
00:34:22,387 --> 00:34:24,171
From who?
637
00:34:24,241 --> 00:34:25,730
From me.
638
00:34:25,804 --> 00:34:29,141
You know, I tried to be
a good mom. I really did.
639
00:34:29,205 --> 00:34:31,804
But I know myself.
640
00:34:31,868 --> 00:34:33,636
And if he...
641
00:34:33,693 --> 00:34:35,684
if he was
gonna grow up normal,
642
00:34:35,751 --> 00:34:37,810
he needed to get away
from me.
643
00:34:37,885 --> 00:34:39,436
What a cop-out.
644
00:34:39,534 --> 00:34:41,691
I think
you're just being selfish.
645
00:34:41,753 --> 00:34:43,684
You know, trust me, Karen,
646
00:34:43,757 --> 00:34:45,705
there is nothing
that you could say
647
00:34:45,774 --> 00:34:48,710
to make me think less
about myself than I already do.
648
00:34:48,779 --> 00:34:52,592
But if it gives him
a chance, it's worth it.
649
00:34:52,667 --> 00:34:55,897
Aren't you afraid
he's gonna hate you?
650
00:34:57,482 --> 00:35:01,262
I love him enough
to let him hate me.
651
00:35:13,485 --> 00:35:16,618
Well, I hope you're not
making a big mistake.
652
00:35:26,380 --> 00:35:28,053
Well...
653
00:35:28,127 --> 00:35:29,850
me, too.
654
00:35:33,467 --> 00:35:37,231
So I'm not defending
everything she did, Travers,
655
00:35:37,305 --> 00:35:40,676
but you have to know,
she loved you,
656
00:35:40,749 --> 00:35:43,950
more than you can imagine.
657
00:35:46,146 --> 00:35:48,708
I really need
to get to class.
658
00:35:58,425 --> 00:36:01,361
Bup, bup, bup.
I believe I called shotgun.
659
00:36:01,432 --> 00:36:03,354
God,
she is so good at that.
660
00:36:03,424 --> 00:36:05,347
She should be.
She's been doing it
661
00:36:05,411 --> 00:36:08,260
since she rode shotgun
on an actual stagecoach.
662
00:36:08,261 --> 00:36:08,854
Hey. Hey.
663
00:36:11,527 --> 00:36:14,153
I realized...
I never thanked you
664
00:36:14,215 --> 00:36:17,528
for coming all the way out here
just to tell me.
665
00:36:17,599 --> 00:36:20,090
That was really cool of you.
666
00:36:20,156 --> 00:36:23,274
We felt we owed it
to your mom.
667
00:36:23,327 --> 00:36:25,050
Oh, my God.
I can't believe we forgot.
668
00:36:25,121 --> 00:36:26,708
What?
669
00:36:31,264 --> 00:36:33,018
We, uh...
670
00:36:33,086 --> 00:36:36,387
Also came to give you
your mom's ashes.
671
00:36:40,142 --> 00:36:43,272
We thought you might
wanna scatter them somewhere.
672
00:36:46,953 --> 00:36:49,614
Unless that's a little...
673
00:36:49,688 --> 00:36:52,383
weird for you.
674
00:36:54,351 --> 00:36:56,406
Why don't you guys take 'em?
675
00:36:58,064 --> 00:37:01,163
Are you sure?
676
00:37:01,238 --> 00:37:03,929
Yeah.
677
00:37:04,004 --> 00:37:06,767
You were her best friends.
678
00:37:08,477 --> 00:37:11,622
I'm sure you could think
of the perfect place to put her.
679
00:37:21,942 --> 00:37:24,527
Okay, we're here.
680
00:37:24,600 --> 00:37:26,700
Guys...
wake up.
681
00:37:26,759 --> 00:37:29,796
Guys?
682
00:37:31,517 --> 00:37:34,227
We're home. Get out.
683
00:37:34,279 --> 00:37:36,919
Lord, Lynette. You nearly
gave me a heart attack.
684
00:37:36,994 --> 00:37:39,885
Yeah, I'd like to see Edie
again, but not tonight.
685
00:37:39,954 --> 00:37:41,875
Oh, I think my leg's asleep.
686
00:37:41,954 --> 00:37:44,445
Actually, that's my leg.
Get your hand off.
687
00:37:46,000 --> 00:37:48,216
Lynette, thank you again
for driving.
688
00:37:48,289 --> 00:37:50,344
You bet.
- Hold it.
689
00:37:50,418 --> 00:37:53,864
We still gotta figure out where
we're gonna spread the ashes.
690
00:37:55,310 --> 00:37:58,578
Now it's gotta be someplace
that was meaningful to Edie.
691
00:37:58,649 --> 00:38:02,729
Well, Edie once told me she lost
her virginity in a cow pasture.
692
00:38:02,801 --> 00:38:04,723
If we can
find that exact field...
693
00:38:04,792 --> 00:38:07,088
we'd find a lot
of traumatized cows.
694
00:38:09,309 --> 00:38:11,749
Do we really need to do
this tonight? They're ashes.
695
00:38:11,812 --> 00:38:14,175
It's not like
they're gonna go bad.
696
00:38:14,241 --> 00:38:15,860
Fine. We'll talk tomorrow.
697
00:38:31,250 --> 00:38:34,821
Oh, Edie, what are
we gonna do with you?
698
00:39:11,249 --> 00:39:13,870
Subtle as always, I see.
699
00:39:26,638 --> 00:39:28,923
This was a wonderful idea,
Karen.
700
00:39:28,989 --> 00:39:32,171
It wasn't exactly mine. Now be
careful. You're spilling Edie.
701
00:39:32,224 --> 00:39:35,108
Urn is empty.
702
00:39:35,162 --> 00:39:36,586
Let's do it.
703
00:39:36,647 --> 00:39:38,917
Shouldn't we say something
first?
704
00:39:38,975 --> 00:39:40,835
Like what?
705
00:39:40,898 --> 00:39:42,803
I don't know.
706
00:39:42,858 --> 00:39:45,689
A few words describing
how we felt about her?
707
00:39:45,759 --> 00:39:48,313
I don't think Edie would want us
to get all sappy.
708
00:39:48,391 --> 00:39:51,124
Well, I think if we're quick
about it, she'd be fine.
709
00:39:51,125 --> 00:39:51,326
Mm.
710
00:39:51,400 --> 00:39:52,852
Here's a thought--
711
00:39:52,927 --> 00:39:56,127
We all say one word that sums up
what we thought of her.
712
00:39:56,185 --> 00:40:00,038
And then we dump her?
- Then we dump her.
713
00:40:00,112 --> 00:40:02,950
Just one word. This is hard.
714
00:40:03,003 --> 00:40:04,053
Mm.
715
00:40:04,117 --> 00:40:06,422
Okay, I got one.
I'll go first.
716
00:40:06,495 --> 00:40:10,192
Edie Britt was sexy.
717
00:40:10,259 --> 00:40:12,054
Perceptive.
718
00:40:12,117 --> 00:40:14,846
Strong.
719
00:40:14,920 --> 00:40:17,445
Beautiful.
- Mm-hmm.
720
00:40:19,677 --> 00:40:21,088
I need four words.
721
00:40:21,161 --> 00:40:22,912
Ay.
722
00:40:22,984 --> 00:40:25,921
Okay. I want to do Edie justice,
and for that to happen,
723
00:40:25,985 --> 00:40:27,161
I need four words, okay?
724
00:40:27,162 --> 00:40:30,100
Edie would so not be surprised
you're ruining this moment.
725
00:40:30,171 --> 00:40:33,542
Go ahead, Susan. What are
your four words for Edie?
726
00:40:33,613 --> 00:40:37,401
One of a kind.
727
00:40:42,392 --> 00:40:45,064
Now it's time.
728
00:40:47,789 --> 00:40:49,248
And that is
729
00:40:49,313 --> 00:40:52,880
how Wisteria Lane came to be
my final resting place.
730
00:40:55,959 --> 00:40:59,877
My ashes were spread over grass
I had once walked on...
731
00:41:03,079 --> 00:41:06,748
beneath trees that had
once given me shade...
732
00:41:09,224 --> 00:41:13,633
on top of roses
I once admired...
733
00:41:15,703 --> 00:41:20,599
and beside fences
I once gossiped over.
734
00:41:20,651 --> 00:41:24,070
And after my friends had
finished saying good-bye,
735
00:41:24,144 --> 00:41:29,434
a wind came along and took what
was left of me into the air.
736
00:41:31,158 --> 00:41:33,823
As I looked down on the world,
737
00:41:33,885 --> 00:41:36,647
I began to let go of it.
738
00:41:36,722 --> 00:41:39,362
I let go of white picket fences
739
00:41:39,421 --> 00:41:41,992
and cars in driveways,
740
00:41:42,057 --> 00:41:45,801
coffee cups
and vacuum cleaners.
741
00:41:45,864 --> 00:41:49,686
I let go of all those things
which seem so ordinary,
742
00:41:49,752 --> 00:41:53,229
but when you put them together,
they make up a life...
743
00:41:53,295 --> 00:41:58,595
a life
that really was one of a kind.
744
00:41:58,660 --> 00:42:00,115
I'll tell you something--
745
00:42:00,174 --> 00:42:04,363
It's not hard to die
when you know you have lived,
746
00:42:04,436 --> 00:42:06,210
and I did.
747
00:42:06,289 --> 00:42:09,193
Oh, how I lived.
748
00:42:10,194 --> 00:42:11,194
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