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[Mary Alice] Previously
on Desperate Housewives:
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00:00:05,022 --> 00:00:08,776
I'm gonna die, and I'd like to know what
happened to my daughter before I do.
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00:00:08,859 --> 00:00:12,029
When it comes to Wisteria Lane,
there are old crimes...
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00:00:15,239 --> 00:00:17,450
- [grunts]
...new crimes...
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00:00:17,575 --> 00:00:20,119
As soon as it gets dark,
we get rid of that body.
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00:00:20,203 --> 00:00:24,415
...and crimes that are happening...
- [tyres screeching, crashing]
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00:00:24,499 --> 00:00:26,709
... right under everyone's nose.
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00:00:26,834 --> 00:00:28,961
I'm thinking it's the Applewhites.
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[Mary Alice] Jim Halverson was aware
that he had little to offer a woman.
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00:00:37,220 --> 00:00:40,639
He was neither rich,
nor smart, nor handsome.
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Are you Jim? I'm Susan Mayer.
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Oh.
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So when his friends set him up on a
blind date with a beautiful stranger...
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00:00:47,562 --> 00:00:50,816
Wow. You're so much hotter
than Nikki said you'd be.
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How old are you?
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How old do you think I am?
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... Jim made the tragic decision
to try to be funny.
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Not a day over 50. [laughs]
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Why don't we get our table?
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[stutters] See, that was funny
because you're so obviously not 50.
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That's why I said 50
because it's absurd.
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Jim did everything he could
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to get Susan Mayer to laugh.
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He tried racial humour.
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So guess what time
Chinese people go to the dentist?
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00:01:17,800 --> 00:01:20,886
Two-thirty. It's... [laughs]
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Get it? Tooth hurt-y?
"Tooth hurt-y!" [laughs]
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I love that.
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He tried to be engagingly risqué.
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Rectum? Damn near killed him!
[laughs] It's...
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00:01:33,982 --> 00:01:36,109
Uh, you know what a rectum is, right?
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[coughs]
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He even tried gentle teasing.
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[stammering] No, you see,
by comparing you to a Nazi,
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I was making the point
that you're so not a Nazi.
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And just when Jim thought
the date couldn't get any worse...
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Oh! Ow! Oh! [sighs]
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... it did.
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00:01:58,964 --> 00:02:01,174
OK, Jim. I need you to look up...
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...and down.
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All right. So how did this happen?
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It was an accident.
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Oh, I don't know about that.
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In some cultures head-butting
is a mating ritual. [laughs]
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Yeah.
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00:02:13,061 --> 00:02:16,063
Dr McCready, can I talk
to you about my head?
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Away from... the draught?
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00:02:19,442 --> 00:02:22,403
Yeah. Call me Dr Ron. Everyone does.
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Uh, Dr Ron,
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Pretend there's something
wrong and admit me.
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- I'm sorry?
- It's the worst date of my life.
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That man is the most
obnoxious, offensive, human being.
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You're looking at me like I'm crazy.
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I will be if I spend one more second
with him, so you gotta help me.
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It's my mental health.
My mental health.
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You took an oath.
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Could you let go of my lapel, please?
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Oh, sorry.
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Um, listen, I'm sorry
your date's not going well,
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but I can't admit you, Susan.
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Right, right.
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Jim, let's... let's take
a look at those reflexes.
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Hey, I got a joke for you, doctor.
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What's the medical term
for the circumcision of a rabbit?
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Hare-cut.
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[laughs] That's...
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I don't... I always...
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I'm gonna need to keep
you here for a while, run some tests.
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- Really? I...
- I'm still worried about that bump.
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- Oh! Ow! No!
- That's still...
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And, Susan, you're good to go.
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[Mary Alice] And though
it only lasted a moment,
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Jim caught the look that passed
between his date and his doctor.
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Thank you so much, Dr Ron.
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And he suddenly got the feeling...
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... the joke was on him.
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[Mary Alice] The annual blood drive
was a tradition on Wisteria Lane.
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00:04:29,984 --> 00:04:34,363
Most residents came to help
promote health and well-being.
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00:04:34,488 --> 00:04:38,324
But my friends turned up
for a different reason.
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They were growing increasingly
concerned that their street
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was infected with a dangerous
kind of sickness.
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And they came to consult
with one another about a possible cure.
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Oh, great. She caught me staring.
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Have you noticed
how friendly Betty's been
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since that body was found
in front of her house?
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- I don't trust friendly women.
- They don't trust you either.
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00:05:01,096 --> 00:05:04,433
I just know those two have
something to do with that dead body.
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00:05:04,516 --> 00:05:05,893
Do we even know who he is?
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00:05:05,976 --> 00:05:09,146
Well, the paper said the police
are withholding the details.
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00:05:09,271 --> 00:05:12,774
Call in a favour from your detective
pal. Have him poke around.
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00:05:12,900 --> 00:05:16,486
Great idea. You could have him do
a background check on the Applewhites.
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I don't think I can do that.
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Why not? You said he was nice.
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00:05:20,240 --> 00:05:23,075
Well, once he stopped
suspecting me of murdering Rex,
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00:05:23,159 --> 00:05:26,162
he was delightful, but, um,
I-I don't really know him.
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00:05:26,287 --> 00:05:28,664
Somebody has to do
something. I'm losing sleep.
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Betty! Matthew.
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Hello, everybody.
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Susan, a little birdie told me
you're having a birthday soon.
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00:05:36,297 --> 00:05:38,090
We should all go out and celebrate.
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Super.
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Sounds like a plan.
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Count me in.
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- [Bree] Bye.
- [Lynette] See ya.
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Why are you everybody's
best friend all of a sudden?
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If there was ever a time
to be neighbourly, this is it.
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We're idiots for staying here.
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We should've hit the road as soon
as they found Monroe's body.
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How do we know he didn't
tell Foster where we're hiding?
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Because if he had, Foster
would've shown up by now.
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00:06:01,863 --> 00:06:03,823
If we take off,
what are we gonna live on?
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00:06:03,948 --> 00:06:06,242
I have all of our money
tied up in this house.
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- So why not just sell it?
- Patience, Matthew.
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If we take off right away,
it'll look suspicious.
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Now, what we need is a story.
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A reason for us to move.
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Look at this. AB-negative.
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Yeah. It's the rarest
of all blood types.
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There must be something in the water.
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You're my second AB-negative.
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- Seriously?
- Yeah.
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Uh, who was it?
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That guy.
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Hi, Bree.
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Oh, hi.
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I just wanted to thank you
for your advice on my azaleas.
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They're just thriving.
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Oh, it was no trouble at all.
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It's such a shame
I may not be around to enjoy them.
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Well, my mother has taken ill,
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and Matthew and I,
we'll probably go and visit her.
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We may even be moving.
We just don't know yet.
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Oh. Well, where does she live?
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Oh, back in Chicago.
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Is it serious?
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I... I don't know yet.
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Well, obviously,
I'll be speaking with her doctor.
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Oh, Betty, if there's anything
I can do, anything at all...
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Thank you. You've
already done so much.
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Bye.
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Ah... Oh!
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Dr Ron called. He needs to see you
for a follow-up appointment.
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00:07:46,671 --> 00:07:48,715
He needs to see me,
or he wants to see me?
144
00:07:48,840 --> 00:07:51,134
[laughing] Jeez, Mom,
how cute is this guy?
145
00:07:51,259 --> 00:07:54,429
Oh, he could be cuter...
but I don't know how. [laughs]
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So ask him out.
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00:07:56,556 --> 00:07:58,516
Oh, no, I can't do that.
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Mom, he's a cute surgeon.
What the problem?
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00:08:01,394 --> 00:08:02,478
He's young.
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00:08:03,521 --> 00:08:05,231
- Young?
- Younger than me.
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00:08:06,107 --> 00:08:07,901
How much younger?
152
00:08:08,026 --> 00:08:11,028
Let's just say, if I was a senior
in high school, I'd be saying,
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00:08:11,153 --> 00:08:13,030
"Wow, you're a hot fifth grader!"
154
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[scoffs] Of course it's gonna
sound gross if you say it that way.
155
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But you're both adults,
so why not ask him out?
156
00:08:18,785 --> 00:08:21,872
Because the conversation
could go something like this:
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"Dr Ron, I think you're hot."
158
00:08:24,124 --> 00:08:28,211
"Oh, thank you, ma'am. I think it's time
we talk about your hip replacement."
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00:08:29,338 --> 00:08:31,632
Mom, you're hot
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00:08:31,757 --> 00:08:33,799
and... funny and nice
161
00:08:33,925 --> 00:08:35,551
and clearly desperate,
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and guys are into that.
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Play to your strengths.
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[exhales] Thank God you're home.
165
00:08:51,525 --> 00:08:54,445
What's wrong? Pat said
you told her it was an emergency.
166
00:08:54,528 --> 00:08:56,404
The boys were sent
home from school.
167
00:08:56,488 --> 00:08:59,574
What? Why? I called.
The machine kept picking up.
168
00:08:59,699 --> 00:09:01,660
I know, I know! Look, I...
169
00:09:01,743 --> 00:09:04,120
They've got chickenpox.
170
00:09:04,913 --> 00:09:06,706
Chickenpox? That's the emergency?
171
00:09:06,831 --> 00:09:08,333
They're totally contagious.
172
00:09:08,416 --> 00:09:09,876
Not to us.
173
00:09:09,960 --> 00:09:11,586
They are to me. I've never had it.
174
00:09:11,711 --> 00:09:13,254
Well, you never told me that.
175
00:09:13,338 --> 00:09:15,048
The point is, I can't go in there.
176
00:09:15,840 --> 00:09:17,175
It's a hot zone.
177
00:09:17,258 --> 00:09:20,427
Well, Tom, somebody's
got to take care of our kids.
178
00:09:20,511 --> 00:09:22,971
Exactly, and since you're immune...
179
00:09:23,097 --> 00:09:25,224
I have to get back to work.
180
00:09:25,307 --> 00:09:26,892
Just for a couple of days.
181
00:09:26,975 --> 00:09:30,813
It is not the Ebola virus. It's
chickenpox. You are being a baby.
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00:09:31,605 --> 00:09:33,107
- Yes, I am.
- OK.
183
00:09:34,066 --> 00:09:35,693
If you think I'm being a baby now,
184
00:09:35,818 --> 00:09:38,487
do I need to remind you
of what I'm like when I'm sick?
185
00:09:40,155 --> 00:09:42,533
Remember that time I had strep throat?
186
00:09:43,450 --> 00:09:45,660
We wound up in marriage counselling.
187
00:09:47,328 --> 00:09:48,663
I'll call the office.
188
00:09:51,582 --> 00:09:53,000
Thanks, honey.
189
00:09:53,584 --> 00:09:55,712
Uh, Mrs Solis? I gotta talk to you.
190
00:09:55,795 --> 00:09:58,756
If this is about Luis
over-watering the hydrangeas again,
191
00:09:58,840 --> 00:10:00,717
I told you, no one likes a tattletale.
192
00:10:00,800 --> 00:10:02,510
My wife left me.
193
00:10:03,678 --> 00:10:07,931
Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know you
and Bonita were having problems.
194
00:10:08,014 --> 00:10:11,518
We weren't. Uh, it was all of a sudden,
she just packed her bags and left.
195
00:10:11,643 --> 00:10:14,020
She said I have an illness,
I need to get help.
196
00:10:15,063 --> 00:10:17,107
- Why?
- There's nothing wrong with me.
197
00:10:17,190 --> 00:10:20,277
I just like to look
at pretty ladies on the Internet.
198
00:10:20,402 --> 00:10:21,486
Uh-huh.
199
00:10:21,570 --> 00:10:25,157
Sure, they're not always dressed,
and sometimes there's more than one.
200
00:10:26,283 --> 00:10:28,743
But I only go to the classy Web sites.
201
00:10:28,827 --> 00:10:30,954
There's some really
sick stuff out there.
202
00:10:31,037 --> 00:10:32,997
Ralph! Make your point.
203
00:10:33,122 --> 00:10:36,208
Um, last night, uh,
I found this new Web site.
204
00:10:36,333 --> 00:10:38,627
There was a picture
of a lady on a bearskin rug,
205
00:10:38,752 --> 00:10:41,922
with nothing on except a little
pointy elf hat. It was festive.
206
00:10:42,006 --> 00:10:45,509
[chuckles] Uh, Ralph,
why are you telling me this?
207
00:10:45,634 --> 00:10:47,261
I'm sorry, it's just, um...
208
00:10:48,179 --> 00:10:51,348
[clears throat]... I think
you really need to see this.
209
00:10:54,059 --> 00:10:56,519
[gasps] Oh, my God!
210
00:10:56,644 --> 00:10:58,521
The lighting looks great on you.
211
00:10:58,605 --> 00:11:01,608
Most of the time
you have to squint to see anything.
212
00:11:01,733 --> 00:11:04,569
And not here. No, sir.
That's... that's good.
213
00:11:04,652 --> 00:11:08,156
Well, um, thank you, Ralph,
for bringing this to my attention.
214
00:11:09,032 --> 00:11:13,328
Um, Mrs Solis, I was wondering,
would you sign that for me?
215
00:11:15,538 --> 00:11:16,539
Oh, OK.
216
00:11:22,127 --> 00:11:23,378
[sighs]
217
00:11:23,795 --> 00:11:25,672
[groans]
218
00:11:29,301 --> 00:11:31,511
[exhales]
219
00:11:36,016 --> 00:11:37,559
Where've you been?
220
00:11:39,269 --> 00:11:41,063
Why didn't you come to see me?
221
00:11:41,146 --> 00:11:45,775
I came every Sunday. You were
just too out of it to know I was here.
222
00:11:46,400 --> 00:11:47,818
I think you're lying.
223
00:11:49,987 --> 00:11:54,033
But then again, these days,
I think everyone's been lying to me.
224
00:11:54,867 --> 00:11:56,994
The thing is, you're here now.
225
00:11:59,664 --> 00:12:02,124
So tell me what I want to know.
226
00:12:03,542 --> 00:12:06,294
Did you find the man
who killed my daughter?
227
00:12:16,137 --> 00:12:18,598
It was a guy named Todd Forrest.
228
00:12:18,682 --> 00:12:21,059
He was a lowlife drug dealer.
229
00:12:21,142 --> 00:12:23,436
He got her hooked again.
230
00:12:23,561 --> 00:12:26,189
She tried to steal from him,
and he killed her.
231
00:12:27,524 --> 00:12:29,650
Then I killed him.
232
00:12:36,490 --> 00:12:38,784
I thought hearing that
would make you happy.
233
00:12:38,909 --> 00:12:41,370
I thought it would too.
234
00:12:42,204 --> 00:12:44,164
But it doesn't.
235
00:12:47,084 --> 00:12:48,544
Ohh!
236
00:12:48,627 --> 00:12:52,381
I'm sorry, I want to start your IV,
but your veins are kind of bad.
237
00:12:52,464 --> 00:12:54,257
Well, here. Let me help you.
238
00:12:54,882 --> 00:12:56,217
[yells]
239
00:12:56,300 --> 00:13:00,138
What the hell
are you doing?! You're crazy!
240
00:13:00,263 --> 00:13:02,390
You're fired. Get out.
241
00:13:02,473 --> 00:13:03,850
[gasps]
242
00:13:07,228 --> 00:13:09,605
[sighs]
243
00:13:10,982 --> 00:13:13,025
So I guess we're done then.
244
00:13:13,818 --> 00:13:15,153
Yeah.
245
00:13:18,613 --> 00:13:20,198
You, uh...
246
00:13:22,075 --> 00:13:24,369
...gonna come see me again?
247
00:13:26,037 --> 00:13:28,498
You planning on having an open casket?
248
00:13:47,057 --> 00:13:48,767
- Hey, guys.
- Hey.
249
00:13:48,851 --> 00:13:50,978
- Hi, Lynette.
- Hi, Carlos. [chuckles]
250
00:13:51,061 --> 00:13:53,522
All right, a Reuben! How sweet is that?
251
00:13:53,647 --> 00:13:55,691
Lunch brought right to the golf course.
252
00:13:55,816 --> 00:13:57,693
I hear you got some pretty sick kids.
253
00:13:57,776 --> 00:13:59,153
Oh, it's just chickenpox,
254
00:13:59,236 --> 00:14:02,198
but Braveheart here will only
come in to sleep and shower.
255
00:14:02,281 --> 00:14:05,116
I don't blame him. I wouldn't
wanna shoot blanks either.
256
00:14:05,200 --> 00:14:06,284
[laughing]
257
00:14:06,409 --> 00:14:08,203
Be well, my man. Bye, Lynette.
258
00:14:08,286 --> 00:14:10,747
- See ya later.
- [chuckles]
259
00:14:10,830 --> 00:14:12,957
What did he mean, "shooting blanks"?
260
00:14:13,082 --> 00:14:14,709
Oh, it-it-it's nothing.
261
00:14:14,834 --> 00:14:19,005
There's just a small chance of sterility
if a grown man gets chickenpox, so...
262
00:14:19,088 --> 00:14:21,925
We're not having more kids.
Why would it matter?
263
00:14:22,008 --> 00:14:23,551
Survival instinct.
264
00:14:23,635 --> 00:14:27,764
[laughs] So that if you're the last man
to survive a nuclear holocaust,
265
00:14:27,847 --> 00:14:29,556
you can repopulate the planet?
266
00:14:29,640 --> 00:14:33,227
No, all I'm saying is, if something
were to happen to either one of us,
267
00:14:33,310 --> 00:14:36,396
I'd want either one of us
to have, you know, options.
268
00:14:37,522 --> 00:14:42,569
So you're saying that, if I died,
269
00:14:42,694 --> 00:14:45,239
you would want
a second wife and a family?
270
00:14:46,406 --> 00:14:47,407
Maybe.
271
00:14:47,532 --> 00:14:49,243
[scoffs] I can't believe
272
00:14:49,326 --> 00:14:52,078
- you've actually thought about this.
- Haven't you?
273
00:14:52,161 --> 00:14:56,374
Thought about who I'd marry
if you died? Hmm. No.
274
00:14:56,457 --> 00:14:59,418
Honey, it's a backup plan.
I'm not gonna use it!
275
00:14:59,502 --> 00:15:01,295
Then why have it?
276
00:15:01,379 --> 00:15:05,132
Well, I don't know, because it's...
it's like there's this door, right?
277
00:15:05,216 --> 00:15:08,135
And I'm not planning
on actually going through it,
278
00:15:08,219 --> 00:15:10,888
because I'm so happy
in the room that I'm in,
279
00:15:10,972 --> 00:15:14,392
but in the case of fire or flood,
280
00:15:14,475 --> 00:15:17,143
it's comforting to know
that the door is unlocked.
281
00:15:18,770 --> 00:15:20,355
I'm not through with that.
282
00:15:20,438 --> 00:15:23,233
Why don't you have
your second wife make you lunch, OK?
283
00:15:23,316 --> 00:15:24,818
Oops!
284
00:15:24,901 --> 00:15:26,361
You...
285
00:15:29,030 --> 00:15:33,660
Bree, uh, I have to say, I was, uh...
I was very pleased to get your call.
286
00:15:33,743 --> 00:15:36,746
I'm-I'm surprised you want
to have anything to do with me,
287
00:15:36,830 --> 00:15:38,873
given our recent history.
288
00:15:38,999 --> 00:15:42,751
Oh, you mean your having suspected
me of murdering my husband?
289
00:15:42,876 --> 00:15:45,546
Detective, that is all
water under the bridge now.
290
00:15:45,629 --> 00:15:47,840
I'm very glad to hear you say that.
291
00:15:48,340 --> 00:15:50,968
I do have to confess
that I have an ulterior motive.
292
00:15:51,051 --> 00:15:53,262
I need to ask you a favour.
293
00:15:53,345 --> 00:15:55,806
Oh, well, shoot. Whatever I can do.
294
00:15:55,931 --> 00:15:58,142
We have new neighbours, the Applewhites.
295
00:15:58,267 --> 00:16:01,228
A mother and her son.
They just moved here from Chicago.
296
00:16:01,979 --> 00:16:03,312
And they seem very nice,
297
00:16:03,396 --> 00:16:07,233
but there's... there's something
about them that's off.
298
00:16:07,316 --> 00:16:09,944
They're odd.
299
00:16:10,027 --> 00:16:11,654
- Odd?
- Yeah.
300
00:16:11,779 --> 00:16:15,366
They're secretive. There was a dead body
found in front of their house.
301
00:16:15,450 --> 00:16:19,203
I can't run a background check
on your neighbours for being odd.
302
00:16:20,288 --> 00:16:21,831
Oh.
303
00:16:22,540 --> 00:16:26,043
Is that why you wanted to see me?
To... to ask me that?
304
00:16:26,169 --> 00:16:28,044
Yeah, why?
305
00:16:28,712 --> 00:16:30,255
[laughs]
306
00:16:30,338 --> 00:16:34,468
Well, during the investigation,
I just thought there was kind of a...
307
00:16:34,551 --> 00:16:37,220
...um, spark between us.
308
00:16:37,304 --> 00:16:40,474
You know, I thought
this might be a date.
309
00:16:42,976 --> 00:16:47,689
Uh, no. [laughs] I just
wanted to ask you a favour.
310
00:16:47,814 --> 00:16:51,066
Fine. No harm done.
311
00:16:51,150 --> 00:16:54,737
When do I... ever get to have lunch
with such a lovely lady, anyway?
312
00:16:54,862 --> 00:16:58,115
Date or... no date.
313
00:16:59,325 --> 00:17:02,077
Are you sure that you can't
check on the Applewhites?
314
00:17:02,161 --> 00:17:05,122
I just know that there's
something there, and, you know,
315
00:17:05,206 --> 00:17:07,082
I have a sixth sense about people.
316
00:17:07,208 --> 00:17:11,253
And yet you got engaged to the man
who murdered your husband.
317
00:17:15,590 --> 00:17:18,426
Blood pressure looks fine.
You're free to go, Ms. Mayer.
318
00:17:19,552 --> 00:17:21,262
You mean I'm not gonna see Dr Ron?
319
00:17:21,346 --> 00:17:24,933
Well, I do the follow-up exams. Dr Ron
only comes in if there's a problem.
320
00:17:25,725 --> 00:17:29,062
Oh, well, maybe I should go ahead
and see him anyway, just to be safe.
321
00:17:29,187 --> 00:17:32,524
I'm sorry, Dr Ron's
schedule is very tight today.
322
00:17:32,607 --> 00:17:34,984
So unless you're
having a serious problem...
323
00:17:37,487 --> 00:17:40,030
You're experiencing nausea,
chills and tingling?
324
00:17:40,155 --> 00:17:43,825
Yeah. But now that I think about it,
I bet it's just all the coffee I drink.
325
00:17:43,909 --> 00:17:45,786
I drink way too much coffee.
326
00:17:45,869 --> 00:17:47,829
Do you like to drink coffee?
327
00:17:47,955 --> 00:17:50,415
Uh, no. No.
328
00:17:50,499 --> 00:17:52,709
The tingling is
in your fingers and toes?
329
00:17:52,834 --> 00:17:56,505
I should switch to juice. I know the
best juice place. You would love it.
330
00:17:56,588 --> 00:17:58,632
- Do you drink juice?
- Wow.
331
00:17:59,675 --> 00:18:03,511
Susan, how often have you been having
these involuntary muscle spasms?
332
00:18:04,595 --> 00:18:06,889
Oh, oh, uh, not that often.
333
00:18:07,014 --> 00:18:09,392
I probably just need a good massage.
334
00:18:11,435 --> 00:18:12,770
Susan?
335
00:18:13,938 --> 00:18:14,939
Yeah?
336
00:18:16,607 --> 00:18:18,401
I want to get you in for an MRI.
337
00:18:18,484 --> 00:18:22,154
Oh! Oh, oh, no. I don't think
that's necessary. [chuckles]
338
00:18:22,280 --> 00:18:23,447
You a doctor?
339
00:18:23,572 --> 00:18:26,741
I got high marks in math and science.
340
00:18:28,285 --> 00:18:29,786
I want to get you in for an MRI.
341
00:18:35,500 --> 00:18:36,835
Mm-mm-mm.
342
00:18:37,544 --> 00:18:40,797
No. I think, given the misunderstanding,
I should get the bill.
343
00:18:40,922 --> 00:18:41,923
I won't hear of it.
344
00:18:42,048 --> 00:18:44,342
All right, we'll split it.
345
00:18:44,467 --> 00:18:45,719
Fair enough.
346
00:18:49,930 --> 00:18:53,100
You know what? Let me, uh...
let me give you a ride home.
347
00:18:53,934 --> 00:18:56,770
Detective Barton, is this
some sort of high school ploy
348
00:18:56,854 --> 00:18:58,313
to get me back to your place?
349
00:18:58,397 --> 00:19:01,984
I just don't think you should
be driving a car. You've been drinking.
350
00:19:02,067 --> 00:19:04,194
I had two glasses of wine.
351
00:19:04,319 --> 00:19:07,322
Three, plus the tawny port
with dessert.
352
00:19:07,406 --> 00:19:11,243
It's all here on the bill,
if you want to take a look.
353
00:19:11,326 --> 00:19:13,619
You know what? I politely rejected you,
354
00:19:13,703 --> 00:19:16,706
and now you're getting
your revenge by embarrassing me.
355
00:19:16,789 --> 00:19:19,333
You've had too much to drink.
Give me your keys.
356
00:19:19,417 --> 00:19:21,210
I am not giving you anything.
357
00:19:23,337 --> 00:19:25,048
Except the bill.
358
00:19:33,556 --> 00:19:35,683
[siren]
359
00:20:01,081 --> 00:20:02,708
What do you think you're doing?
360
00:20:02,792 --> 00:20:05,085
I followed you
to make sure you were OK.
361
00:20:06,086 --> 00:20:07,087
You were weaving.
362
00:20:08,088 --> 00:20:09,548
Please step out of the car.
363
00:20:09,632 --> 00:20:11,675
[scoffs] You can't be serious.
364
00:20:12,760 --> 00:20:14,011
Out.
365
00:20:15,304 --> 00:20:18,724
Detective, I am not drunk,
and I'm not stupid.
366
00:20:18,849 --> 00:20:21,227
I know exactly what this is all about.
367
00:20:21,310 --> 00:20:23,437
I'm gonna need you
to take a sobriety test.
368
00:20:23,562 --> 00:20:26,564
Sobriety test?
I'm not taking any sobriety...
369
00:20:27,524 --> 00:20:29,400
...test.
370
00:20:29,943 --> 00:20:32,403
This behaviour stems
from the hurt feelings
371
00:20:32,487 --> 00:20:34,531
of a man with very low self-esteem.
372
00:20:34,614 --> 00:20:36,574
The world is a big place,
373
00:20:36,699 --> 00:20:39,244
and I'm sure there is
a woman out there somewhere
374
00:20:39,327 --> 00:20:42,747
who'll respond
to your macho posturing.
375
00:20:43,998 --> 00:20:47,001
Well, [exhales] here's hoping.
376
00:20:52,548 --> 00:20:53,966
[exhales]
377
00:20:56,552 --> 00:20:58,512
Baby, what you're about to see
378
00:20:58,595 --> 00:21:01,682
will most likely shock and upset you.
379
00:21:01,765 --> 00:21:02,766
OK.
380
00:21:02,891 --> 00:21:06,144
Remember Scott, the photographer
I was dating when we met?
381
00:21:06,270 --> 00:21:08,063
The one I dumped for you?
382
00:21:08,188 --> 00:21:11,357
Who never got over it and who
I said was gonna get back at me?
383
00:21:11,440 --> 00:21:13,234
Mm-hm.
384
00:21:15,152 --> 00:21:17,530
Oh, Carlos, I love you so much.
385
00:21:17,613 --> 00:21:19,115
Move.
386
00:21:22,076 --> 00:21:23,494
What is this?
387
00:21:23,577 --> 00:21:26,998
Scott's Web site,
with pictures of me on it.
388
00:21:29,208 --> 00:21:30,835
[clicks, beeps]
389
00:21:31,877 --> 00:21:33,754
Well, say something!
390
00:21:33,838 --> 00:21:35,255
Oh, my God.
391
00:21:35,338 --> 00:21:39,426
It was supposed to be funny, a naughty
little Christmas gift for my boyfriend.
392
00:21:39,509 --> 00:21:40,593
[clicks, beeps]
393
00:21:40,719 --> 00:21:42,429
- Oh, my God!
- [clicks, beeps]
394
00:21:42,512 --> 00:21:45,598
I know, I was
freakishly flexible back then.
395
00:21:45,724 --> 00:21:47,600
[clicks, beeps]
396
00:21:47,684 --> 00:21:50,854
I'm sorry. Look, what
are we gonna do about this?
397
00:21:50,937 --> 00:21:52,731
I guess I'll call my lawyers.
398
00:21:52,856 --> 00:21:55,650
I gave these pictures to him
as a gift. He owns them.
399
00:21:55,734 --> 00:21:57,152
Then I guess we're screwed.
400
00:21:57,235 --> 00:21:58,736
Not necessarily.
401
00:21:58,819 --> 00:22:00,446
See, here's what I'm thinking.
402
00:22:00,571 --> 00:22:04,324
Scott's a coward, so you could
totally put the scare into him.
403
00:22:04,408 --> 00:22:07,161
All you gotta do is go
and rough him up,
404
00:22:07,244 --> 00:22:09,038
and he'll take my pictures off.
405
00:22:09,121 --> 00:22:12,041
I'm sorry, but this is your mistake.
406
00:22:12,124 --> 00:22:14,084
You're gonna have to fix it yourself.
407
00:22:14,168 --> 00:22:15,252
And I would love to,
408
00:22:15,335 --> 00:22:18,422
but I have the upper-body strength
of a kitten. I need a brute!
409
00:22:18,505 --> 00:22:20,215
Gabby...
410
00:22:20,340 --> 00:22:23,593
...l'm just now starting to get
my rage issues under control.
411
00:22:24,677 --> 00:22:28,014
This brute doesn't swing that way
anymore, so go find another.
412
00:22:29,557 --> 00:22:32,727
Well, when you left prison,
did they leave you a contact list?
413
00:22:42,570 --> 00:22:44,947
So is Dr Ron gonna be here for this?
414
00:22:45,073 --> 00:22:48,158
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Uh, there's a hook on the wall there.
415
00:22:48,283 --> 00:22:51,161
So go ahead and get your stuff
hung up and just get comfy.
416
00:22:51,244 --> 00:22:54,581
- Dr Ron should be here pretty soon.
- OK.
417
00:22:57,959 --> 00:23:00,587
[sighs]
418
00:23:08,345 --> 00:23:11,514
[Dr Ron] Is she trying
to put on the dust cover?
419
00:23:11,597 --> 00:23:12,681
[man] Yep.
420
00:23:18,270 --> 00:23:20,231
How long were you gonna let this go on?
421
00:23:20,314 --> 00:23:21,774
Just a few more minutes.
422
00:23:22,525 --> 00:23:23,526
Hi, uh, Susan?
423
00:23:24,360 --> 00:23:26,570
- [over intercom] Dr Ron.
- [sighs]
424
00:23:26,695 --> 00:23:29,073
You don't have
to get undressed for this.
425
00:23:30,825 --> 00:23:33,035
Oh! Uh, I-I, uh...
426
00:23:33,118 --> 00:23:35,662
[over intercom] Then why
did you put out a gown?
427
00:23:36,496 --> 00:23:38,122
No, no, it's-it's not a gown.
428
00:23:38,248 --> 00:23:41,000
It's, uh... it's the dust cover
for the MRI machine.
429
00:23:44,546 --> 00:23:47,465
[Dr Ron over intercom]
This should take about 45 minutes.
430
00:23:47,549 --> 00:23:51,135
Now, I know it's really cramped and
uncomfortable, but try not to move.
431
00:23:51,261 --> 00:23:54,264
I realise that this whole process
must be troubling for you.
432
00:23:55,223 --> 00:23:57,182
Yeah, it's pretty troubling.
433
00:23:57,266 --> 00:23:59,935
Well, we're gonna
get to the bottom of this.
434
00:24:00,018 --> 00:24:02,771
[over intercom] And I'll be here
for you, OK?
435
00:24:02,854 --> 00:24:05,315
[electronic humming]
436
00:24:05,440 --> 00:24:06,858
Hey, Dr Ron?
437
00:24:07,484 --> 00:24:12,197
I just have a feeling that everything's
gonna turn out fine, and when it does...
438
00:24:13,282 --> 00:24:14,992
...l'd like to buy you dinner.
439
00:24:15,075 --> 00:24:16,702
To celebrate my health.
440
00:24:16,827 --> 00:24:19,288
You know, I was thinking
maybe Italian?
441
00:24:19,413 --> 00:24:22,748
Oh, what the heck,
maybe we can call it a date.
442
00:24:22,873 --> 00:24:25,334
[laughs] If you like.
443
00:24:29,880 --> 00:24:31,841
Dr Ron?
444
00:24:31,966 --> 00:24:36,512
[man over intercom] He left a while ago.
He got a phone call from his girlfriend.
445
00:24:38,764 --> 00:24:40,391
Oh.
446
00:24:40,474 --> 00:24:41,851
OK.
447
00:24:43,144 --> 00:24:44,561
Thank you.
448
00:24:46,521 --> 00:24:48,481
I'd like to get out now.
449
00:24:48,606 --> 00:24:50,567
[man over intercom] Try not to move.
450
00:24:58,158 --> 00:25:00,535
[saws humming]
451
00:25:06,041 --> 00:25:08,417
Good morning, Luis, Ralph.
452
00:25:08,500 --> 00:25:09,877
Morning, Mrs Solis.
453
00:25:09,960 --> 00:25:13,213
- Good morning, honey.
- Hey, you're talking to me again.
454
00:25:13,339 --> 00:25:16,008
I thought about
what you said about the pictures.
455
00:25:16,091 --> 00:25:17,468
And you're right.
456
00:25:17,551 --> 00:25:20,804
It's my mistake,
and I have to live with it.
457
00:25:50,374 --> 00:25:51,918
What the hell are you doing?
458
00:25:52,001 --> 00:25:53,461
I'm living with it!
459
00:25:55,837 --> 00:25:58,632
Hey! Turn around and keep gardening!
460
00:25:58,715 --> 00:26:00,675
Aw. You're so mean.
461
00:26:01,384 --> 00:26:03,428
Put your clothes on, right now!
462
00:26:03,553 --> 00:26:06,014
Why? You either care
if men leer at me or not.
463
00:26:06,139 --> 00:26:08,266
And you made it clear that you don't.
464
00:26:08,350 --> 00:26:10,560
I am not beating this guy up for you!
465
00:26:10,644 --> 00:26:13,188
Then think of another way
to get my pictures back.
466
00:26:13,313 --> 00:26:15,273
If you don't,
people on Wisteria Lane
467
00:26:15,357 --> 00:26:17,150
are gonna be seeing
a lot more of me!
468
00:26:17,275 --> 00:26:19,401
Ralph! Luis! Feast your eyes!
469
00:26:20,528 --> 00:26:22,071
- [hacking]
- [screams]
470
00:26:22,154 --> 00:26:25,074
- My finger! Ahh!
- I'm sorry!
471
00:26:25,157 --> 00:26:27,701
- My finger! [crying]
- I'm sorry!
472
00:26:27,827 --> 00:26:29,787
It's gotta be here somewhere!
473
00:26:29,870 --> 00:26:32,164
- [crying]
- Don't worry, man, I'll find it!
474
00:26:32,248 --> 00:26:33,833
[footsteps]
475
00:26:34,875 --> 00:26:37,962
Hey, honey. Good news.
476
00:26:38,045 --> 00:26:41,465
I checked on Penny,
and she didn't scream.
477
00:26:41,590 --> 00:26:43,550
I think she's getting used to the mask.
478
00:26:44,467 --> 00:26:46,594
I don't want you to have options, Tom.
479
00:26:47,804 --> 00:26:51,224
If I die, I wanna hear
your life would be over.
480
00:26:51,307 --> 00:26:54,018
I want you to spend the
rest of your life screaming,
481
00:26:54,102 --> 00:26:56,980
"It should have been me on that plane!"
482
00:26:57,856 --> 00:26:59,983
- Plane?
- I'm assuming there was a crash.
483
00:27:00,066 --> 00:27:02,360
- It could have been something else.
- Wait...
484
00:27:02,485 --> 00:27:04,362
Do you have any idea how painful it is
485
00:27:04,445 --> 00:27:07,614
to hear about you even think
about your next wife and kids?
486
00:27:07,698 --> 00:27:09,116
I could never do that.
487
00:27:09,199 --> 00:27:11,410
I can't imagine my life without you.
488
00:27:11,535 --> 00:27:14,621
- You are my everything.
- Honey, you're my everything.
489
00:27:14,746 --> 00:27:18,166
OK, well, that's easy to say.
But I need you to show me.
490
00:27:18,292 --> 00:27:19,710
How?
491
00:27:19,793 --> 00:27:21,587
With a vasectomy.
492
00:27:24,631 --> 00:27:26,425
Can't I just get you some flowers?
493
00:27:26,508 --> 00:27:29,511
It makes perfect sense.
We're not gonna have any more kids.
494
00:27:29,636 --> 00:27:32,096
And the pill just makes
me bloat. It'll be great.
495
00:27:32,221 --> 00:27:33,764
OK, Lynette, this is crazy.
496
00:27:33,848 --> 00:27:35,349
Oh, I know. I know.
497
00:27:35,433 --> 00:27:38,269
But it is what married people do.
498
00:27:38,352 --> 00:27:42,398
They go out of their way
to calm each other's irrational fears.
499
00:27:44,275 --> 00:27:47,778
Oh, come on, Tom,
I really need you to do this.
500
00:27:50,740 --> 00:27:52,616
Well, OK.
501
00:27:52,742 --> 00:27:54,326
Fine, yeah.
502
00:27:54,409 --> 00:27:56,786
I'll make an appointment.
503
00:27:57,620 --> 00:27:59,122
Thank you.
504
00:28:01,791 --> 00:28:03,293
[sighs]
505
00:28:03,376 --> 00:28:06,129
- [chattering]
- [phone ringing]
506
00:28:12,427 --> 00:28:14,012
[exhales]
507
00:28:16,056 --> 00:28:18,349
Hey. Can I ask you something?
508
00:28:18,432 --> 00:28:20,559
I'd rather you didn't.
509
00:28:23,562 --> 00:28:24,938
How'd you get started?
510
00:28:26,482 --> 00:28:27,566
"Started"?
511
00:28:27,649 --> 00:28:29,526
You know, in the escort business.
512
00:28:29,610 --> 00:28:31,195
I beg your pardon?
513
00:28:31,278 --> 00:28:34,239
I bet guys go crazy
with your whole classy,
514
00:28:34,323 --> 00:28:36,450
repressed thing you
got going on, huh?
515
00:28:37,201 --> 00:28:39,828
I mean, your skin
has, like, no pores.
516
00:28:40,954 --> 00:28:44,791
I think there was a compliment
in there somewhere, so thank you.
517
00:28:44,874 --> 00:28:46,459
But I am not an escort.
518
00:28:47,293 --> 00:28:48,753
How much you charge a night?
519
00:28:48,836 --> 00:28:50,004
Look, I...
520
00:28:52,340 --> 00:28:55,218
[sighs] Five thousand.
521
00:28:55,927 --> 00:28:57,261
Whoa.
522
00:28:58,096 --> 00:29:00,556
What do you have to do,
exactly, for five grand?
523
00:29:01,766 --> 00:29:02,767
Hmm.
524
00:29:05,019 --> 00:29:06,520
All right.
525
00:29:06,603 --> 00:29:08,814
Your bail cleared. You're free to go.
526
00:29:08,897 --> 00:29:10,398
Your car's at the impound lot.
527
00:29:10,482 --> 00:29:13,819
- You can pick it up in the morning.
- How am I supposed to get home?
528
00:29:13,944 --> 00:29:15,737
- I don't have money.
- Call a friend.
529
00:29:15,821 --> 00:29:18,490
I have been through
enough humiliation for one day.
530
00:29:18,573 --> 00:29:20,617
I hope you have a better suggestion.
531
00:29:20,700 --> 00:29:22,828
OK, well, let me think.
532
00:29:22,953 --> 00:29:24,579
Um...
533
00:29:24,704 --> 00:29:26,206
Walk.
534
00:29:35,005 --> 00:29:36,173
[cracking]
535
00:29:37,049 --> 00:29:39,677
For goodness sakes.
536
00:29:44,223 --> 00:29:45,808
[honking]
537
00:29:46,725 --> 00:29:47,810
Bree?
538
00:29:49,353 --> 00:29:52,314
- Is everything OK?
- Oh, oh, I'm-I'm fine.
539
00:29:52,398 --> 00:29:54,524
I just, um, had a flat tyre.
540
00:29:55,191 --> 00:29:58,695
It's your lucky day. I'm a whiz
at changing tyres. Hop in.
541
00:29:58,820 --> 00:30:02,657
You know, thank you, but I think it's
actually something more mechanical.
542
00:30:02,782 --> 00:30:05,243
My car has been making
just a terrible noise.
543
00:30:05,368 --> 00:30:06,953
Well, I have Auto Club.
544
00:30:08,705 --> 00:30:10,331
Come on.
545
00:30:12,417 --> 00:30:14,210
[sighs]
546
00:30:15,253 --> 00:30:19,798
Actually, my car has been
impounded by the police.
547
00:30:34,479 --> 00:30:35,939
Thanks, Betty, and, um,
548
00:30:36,023 --> 00:30:39,610
I'd appreciate it if you could
keep this little incident to yourself.
549
00:30:39,735 --> 00:30:41,527
I won't say a word. I swear.
550
00:30:41,652 --> 00:30:45,781
That's good. Because most people
on this street couldn't keep a secret.
551
00:30:45,865 --> 00:30:51,078
Oh, Bree, even if everyone
does find out, it's no big deal.
552
00:30:51,162 --> 00:30:53,122
I mean, lots of people have DUI's.
553
00:30:53,247 --> 00:30:55,791
Yes, but most of those people
were actually drunk
554
00:30:55,916 --> 00:30:58,586
when they were arrested. I was not.
555
00:30:58,669 --> 00:31:00,713
Of course.
556
00:31:02,006 --> 00:31:03,965
You sound like you don't believe me.
557
00:31:05,050 --> 00:31:07,510
Well, um, it's just...
558
00:31:08,970 --> 00:31:11,181
...I know you've gone
through a lot lately.
559
00:31:11,264 --> 00:31:14,934
The death of your husband,
problems with your son.
560
00:31:15,018 --> 00:31:18,605
It would only be natural
if you did self-medicate.
561
00:31:20,273 --> 00:31:24,027
I'm sorry, but since when do you know
so much about my personal life?
562
00:31:24,152 --> 00:31:27,155
Bree! It's like you said,
563
00:31:27,280 --> 00:31:30,199
people on this street
are not great at keeping secrets.
564
00:31:31,658 --> 00:31:32,826
Except for you.
565
00:31:32,910 --> 00:31:35,746
- You're really good at it.
- I beg your pardon?
566
00:31:35,829 --> 00:31:38,707
You moved into your house
in the middle of the night.
567
00:31:38,791 --> 00:31:42,127
God knows what you moved
in that you didn't want anybody to see.
568
00:31:42,252 --> 00:31:45,839
People hear sounds
coming at all hours from there.
569
00:31:45,964 --> 00:31:48,175
And, oh, what was
that last one? Oh, right.
570
00:31:48,258 --> 00:31:50,719
They found a dead body
in front of your home.
571
00:31:50,803 --> 00:31:53,888
Everybody talks about
the Applewhites. Nobody can figure out
572
00:31:54,013 --> 00:31:55,390
what you people are hiding.
573
00:31:55,473 --> 00:31:57,058
So congratulations.
574
00:31:57,141 --> 00:31:59,852
Your secrets are safe.
575
00:31:59,936 --> 00:32:01,479
For now.
576
00:32:11,948 --> 00:32:14,867
[dialling phone]
577
00:32:18,161 --> 00:32:21,748
Edie. Hi, it's Betty Applewhite.
578
00:32:21,832 --> 00:32:24,292
Yeah, I'm sorry to call you so late,
579
00:32:24,417 --> 00:32:29,214
but, um, I really need to meet
with you first thing in the morning.
580
00:32:29,297 --> 00:32:30,841
Yes.
581
00:32:30,924 --> 00:32:34,761
Well, I've decided to sell my house.
582
00:32:39,765 --> 00:32:41,892
Dr Ron. What are you doing here?
583
00:32:42,017 --> 00:32:43,477
Uh, we-we need to talk.
584
00:32:44,895 --> 00:32:47,982
It's not the kind of talk
we can have over the phone.
585
00:32:48,065 --> 00:32:49,942
Oh, are you sure? Um...
586
00:32:50,025 --> 00:32:53,279
Because I would look a lot better
over the phone right now.
587
00:32:54,321 --> 00:32:57,825
Um, Susan, your test results came back.
588
00:33:00,286 --> 00:33:03,204
And for the life of me,
I can't figure it out.
589
00:33:03,288 --> 00:33:06,374
- Based on the symptoms...
- Symptoms?
590
00:33:06,457 --> 00:33:09,794
Yeah, the dizziness, the tingling,
the muscle spasms, the chills.
591
00:33:09,919 --> 00:33:13,756
It could be neurological. It also could
be based on an autoimmune disorder.
592
00:33:13,840 --> 00:33:15,383
Frankly, I'm... I'm stumped.
593
00:33:15,466 --> 00:33:16,467
Oh, no, no, no, no.
594
00:33:16,593 --> 00:33:19,304
Hey, listen,
we're gonna get through this.
595
00:33:19,387 --> 00:33:21,180
[exhales]
596
00:33:21,306 --> 00:33:25,059
I am so sorry, but I'm not sick.
597
00:33:25,143 --> 00:33:27,019
What are you talking about?
598
00:33:27,102 --> 00:33:30,606
[exhales] Your nurse
wouldn't let me see you,
599
00:33:30,689 --> 00:33:32,983
and I really wanted to see you,
600
00:33:33,066 --> 00:33:35,861
so I sort of faked all my symptoms.
601
00:33:35,944 --> 00:33:39,531
The dizziness, the chills,
you know, all of it. [laughs]
602
00:33:39,615 --> 00:33:42,492
Why would you do that?
What the hell is wrong with you?
603
00:33:42,576 --> 00:33:44,786
I know, I know, I feel really awful.
604
00:33:44,870 --> 00:33:48,206
I'm just not the best at meeting men,
and I thought you were cute.
605
00:33:48,332 --> 00:33:50,875
And I sort of thought
maybe you thought I was cute.
606
00:33:51,000 --> 00:33:52,793
You're a doctor. That's so sexy...
607
00:33:52,877 --> 00:33:54,754
So I was up all night, worried sick,
608
00:33:54,837 --> 00:33:58,174
digging through medical books,
trying to figure out some disease
609
00:33:58,257 --> 00:33:59,675
that doesn't really exist!
610
00:33:59,759 --> 00:34:01,469
Really? You were up all night?
611
00:34:01,594 --> 00:34:04,930
Yes! I don't enjoy telling people
I think they're going to die!
612
00:34:05,014 --> 00:34:06,599
Especially not people I like!
613
00:34:07,266 --> 00:34:08,351
You like me?
614
00:34:08,434 --> 00:34:11,062
- Yes!
- What about your girlfriend?
615
00:34:11,145 --> 00:34:13,938
- What girlfriend?
- The one who called in the MRI room.
616
00:34:14,022 --> 00:34:16,941
We had one date. She wanted
a referral to a dermatologist.
617
00:34:17,025 --> 00:34:19,235
She's got eczema.
618
00:34:19,361 --> 00:34:20,445
Oh!
619
00:34:23,490 --> 00:34:25,867
Maybe we could go out sometime?
620
00:34:31,790 --> 00:34:32,874
Do you like sushi?
621
00:34:34,417 --> 00:34:38,253
I love sushi.
I'm available tomorrow night.
622
00:34:38,337 --> 00:34:42,174
Tomorrow's no good. I'll still be angry.
I should be cooled down by Friday.
623
00:34:42,299 --> 00:34:45,719
Oh, uh, Friday's good.
624
00:34:45,803 --> 00:34:50,682
Oh, there's one thing. Your MRI showed
that you have a wandering spleen.
625
00:34:50,766 --> 00:34:52,101
A what?
626
00:34:52,184 --> 00:34:55,938
[laughs] It's no big deal. Sometimes
the thing just moves around in there.
627
00:34:56,063 --> 00:34:57,564
But we'll keep an eye on it.
628
00:35:02,443 --> 00:35:04,320
Wandering what?
629
00:35:08,741 --> 00:35:11,494
OK. Go get him, tiger.
630
00:35:13,454 --> 00:35:14,622
I can't do it, Gabby.
631
00:35:15,456 --> 00:35:16,457
What?
632
00:35:16,582 --> 00:35:19,460
I can't go in there.
I-I thought I could, but I can't.
633
00:35:19,544 --> 00:35:21,003
You promised.
634
00:35:21,087 --> 00:35:24,590
Ever since I got out of prison,
I've been trying to lead a better life.
635
00:35:24,673 --> 00:35:27,759
For the first time, I can honestly
say that I'm a good Catholic,
636
00:35:27,884 --> 00:35:29,302
and I don't wanna ruin that.
637
00:35:30,011 --> 00:35:34,015
So do this today and go
to an extra long Mass tomorrow.
638
00:35:34,099 --> 00:35:35,517
It doesn't work that way.
639
00:35:35,600 --> 00:35:40,147
OK, look, I'm-I'm really trying to
understand your moral dilemma here.
640
00:35:40,230 --> 00:35:41,314
I am.
641
00:35:41,398 --> 00:35:44,651
But if you don't get my pictures
back, I'm gonna be humiliated!
642
00:35:44,734 --> 00:35:48,155
You think our gardener's
the only local perv surfing the web?
643
00:35:48,238 --> 00:35:49,947
I'm sorry, Gabrielle.
644
00:35:50,072 --> 00:35:54,368
You used to go crazy when men would
so much as look at me the wrong way.
645
00:35:54,493 --> 00:35:56,203
And that's when I had clothes on.
646
00:35:56,287 --> 00:35:57,913
I'm trying to be better now.
647
00:35:58,038 --> 00:36:00,666
Or maybe you just don't love me
as much as you used to.
648
00:36:00,749 --> 00:36:03,460
Why can't you just let
me be a good person?
649
00:36:03,544 --> 00:36:06,630
If you really loved me, you
wouldn't even ask me to go in there.
650
00:36:06,755 --> 00:36:09,216
If you really loved me,
I wouldn't have to ask!
651
00:36:14,345 --> 00:36:16,890
[sighs] Fine. Forget it.
652
00:36:18,433 --> 00:36:19,517
Really?
653
00:36:19,642 --> 00:36:23,229
Be a good person. Knock yourself out.
654
00:36:24,939 --> 00:36:26,900
It's not that I don't love you. I...
655
00:36:27,025 --> 00:36:29,485
Yeah, OK, look, let's just go home.
656
00:36:33,489 --> 00:36:35,617
- [chuckles]
- [unbuckles seatbelt]
657
00:36:37,826 --> 00:36:39,077
What are you doing?
658
00:36:39,161 --> 00:36:41,204
I'm getting your pictures back.
659
00:36:42,289 --> 00:36:44,333
I'm not gonna hurt him.
660
00:36:45,751 --> 00:36:49,671
I'll talk to him.
Appeal to his better nature.
661
00:37:01,682 --> 00:37:02,934
Can I help you?
662
00:37:03,017 --> 00:37:04,977
I'm Carlos Solis.
663
00:37:05,853 --> 00:37:09,190
You have naked pictures
of my wife on your Web site.
664
00:37:10,524 --> 00:37:12,318
Oh.
665
00:37:12,401 --> 00:37:16,238
You're, uh... Gabrielle's husband?
666
00:37:16,364 --> 00:37:19,367
- Uh-huh.
- [laughs]
667
00:37:19,450 --> 00:37:21,577
I was just about
to take those off anyway.
668
00:37:22,495 --> 00:37:24,454
Oh.
669
00:37:24,579 --> 00:37:26,081
That's great.
670
00:37:26,164 --> 00:37:28,458
[sighs]
671
00:37:30,251 --> 00:37:32,045
I really appreciate this, Scott.
672
00:37:32,128 --> 00:37:34,005
Hey, no problem.
673
00:37:34,130 --> 00:37:37,717
Gabrielle's pages weren't exactly
raking in the big bucks for me.
674
00:37:37,801 --> 00:37:39,427
I find that hard to believe.
675
00:37:39,552 --> 00:37:42,806
I'm not saying Gabrielle's
not a pretty girl. Of course she is.
676
00:37:42,889 --> 00:37:45,767
But, uh, she ain't exactly
Internet-pretty, you know?
677
00:37:48,477 --> 00:37:49,645
What does that mean?
678
00:37:49,728 --> 00:37:51,939
The web's about fantasy, not fashion.
679
00:37:52,064 --> 00:37:55,734
Guys surfing for porn don't care how
the clothes are hanging off the body.
680
00:37:55,818 --> 00:37:59,321
They just wanna see the goods. If
Miss Nasty ain't rockin' curves...
681
00:37:59,405 --> 00:38:00,989
My wife has a perfect figure.
682
00:38:01,073 --> 00:38:03,117
[laughs] Don't get me wrong, yeah.
683
00:38:03,200 --> 00:38:06,286
Our little Gabby knows
how to work a runway.
684
00:38:06,370 --> 00:38:08,664
But when it comes to cyber-loving,
685
00:38:08,747 --> 00:38:11,582
no real man's gonna waste tissue
on that. There you go.
686
00:38:11,666 --> 00:38:12,917
That's all of them.
687
00:38:13,042 --> 00:38:15,336
So we cool now?
688
00:38:21,426 --> 00:38:24,303
- [groans]
- [door opens]
689
00:38:28,057 --> 00:38:30,017
[exhales]
690
00:38:30,101 --> 00:38:32,562
Now that's my guy.
691
00:38:41,111 --> 00:38:42,487
Hey.
692
00:38:43,697 --> 00:38:44,781
Hey.
693
00:38:44,865 --> 00:38:46,825
You're not limping.
694
00:38:46,908 --> 00:38:49,661
Did everything go OK?
695
00:38:50,745 --> 00:38:51,997
I couldn't do it.
696
00:38:53,206 --> 00:38:54,374
What happened?
697
00:38:56,793 --> 00:38:59,253
I don't know, I got there. I...
698
00:38:59,336 --> 00:39:02,298
I put on the paper gown, and I...
699
00:39:04,216 --> 00:39:05,801
I just couldn't do it.
700
00:39:05,885 --> 00:39:07,595
Why not?
701
00:39:07,720 --> 00:39:10,181
It felt like I was being emasculated.
702
00:39:10,264 --> 00:39:11,599
Oh, please.
703
00:39:11,682 --> 00:39:13,893
I don't make the money
around here any more,
704
00:39:14,018 --> 00:39:16,061
I don't provide for you and the kids.
705
00:39:16,145 --> 00:39:19,648
I wasn't gonna let them snip out
the last thing that makes me a man.
706
00:39:20,649 --> 00:39:22,775
Staying home
and taking care of the kids
707
00:39:22,901 --> 00:39:26,404
doesn't make you less
of a man. That's crazy.
708
00:39:27,197 --> 00:39:31,659
You expect me to calm your irrational
fears, I expect you to calm mine.
709
00:39:42,420 --> 00:39:44,464
Are you saying you're unhappy?
710
00:39:47,174 --> 00:39:48,759
A little bit, yeah.
711
00:39:54,014 --> 00:39:55,974
Well, what are we gonna do about that?
712
00:39:57,017 --> 00:39:58,018
I don't know.
713
00:39:59,311 --> 00:40:01,772
- Well, can't we just?
- No, Lynette...
714
00:40:03,523 --> 00:40:05,233
I don't know.
715
00:40:19,372 --> 00:40:20,456
[sighs]
716
00:40:20,539 --> 00:40:22,249
[glass clinks]
717
00:40:23,626 --> 00:40:24,627
[beep]
718
00:40:24,752 --> 00:40:27,588
[over answering machine]
Hi, it's Detective Barton.
719
00:40:27,672 --> 00:40:30,675
I feel awful about what happened
the other day. I was a jerk.
720
00:40:30,758 --> 00:40:33,134
So to make it up to you,
I did some sniffing around
721
00:40:33,259 --> 00:40:35,970
about the dead man
in front of your neighbour's house.
722
00:40:36,054 --> 00:40:38,598
I've got information.
His name was Curtis Monroe,
723
00:40:38,682 --> 00:40:41,768
a private detective who lost
his license a couple of years ago.
724
00:40:41,893 --> 00:40:43,478
He's apparently from Chicago.
725
00:40:43,561 --> 00:40:45,522
I don't know if this is helpful, but...
726
00:40:45,605 --> 00:40:47,816
[tape rewinding]
727
00:40:47,941 --> 00:40:49,442
... a couple of years ago.
728
00:40:49,526 --> 00:40:52,612
He's apparently from Chicago.
I don't know if this is helpful,
729
00:40:52,737 --> 00:40:56,324
but l-I just feel terrible
about what happened...
730
00:40:57,741 --> 00:41:00,744
[Mary Alice]
Illnesses can take on many forms.
731
00:41:00,828 --> 00:41:04,081
Those of the body are easy to treat.
732
00:41:04,206 --> 00:41:07,626
Much more difficult
are the hidden maladies
733
00:41:07,751 --> 00:41:10,212
that fester in our hearts,
734
00:41:11,171 --> 00:41:14,675
the secret addictions
that consume our souls...
735
00:41:16,635 --> 00:41:21,097
... and the diseases we deny
which affect ourjudgment.
736
00:41:26,310 --> 00:41:31,107
To survive we need to find that
special someone who can heal us.
737
00:41:32,066 --> 00:41:35,319
I worked so hard all my life.
738
00:41:35,403 --> 00:41:37,363
So hard.
739
00:41:38,531 --> 00:41:40,741
Now it's all nothing.
740
00:41:42,660 --> 00:41:44,536
I got one daughter I hate,
741
00:41:44,619 --> 00:41:46,496
one who hates me
742
00:41:47,497 --> 00:41:50,417
and one dead before her time.
743
00:41:52,252 --> 00:41:54,546
No one left for me now.
744
00:41:55,630 --> 00:41:58,592
Ah, what did I do it for?
745
00:42:02,429 --> 00:42:03,972
That was good.
746
00:42:04,890 --> 00:42:06,933
Didn't feel a thing.
747
00:42:08,767 --> 00:42:11,145
I have enough pain. [chuckles]
748
00:42:11,228 --> 00:42:13,105
I don't need any more.
749
00:42:13,230 --> 00:42:15,441
[Mary Alice] But we can never predict
750
00:42:15,566 --> 00:42:19,320
who will have the cure
for what ails us...
751
00:42:19,403 --> 00:42:22,990
[woman] The other nurses all warned me
you were difficult, Mr Taylor.
752
00:42:23,115 --> 00:42:26,785
... or when they'll show up.
753
00:42:27,912 --> 00:42:32,540
But I think we're
gonna get along... just fine.