1 00:00:00,101 --> 00:00:02,149 Previously on "Desperate Housewives"... 2 00:00:02,173 --> 00:00:04,511 Is anybody here? 3 00:00:04,535 --> 00:00:06,153 There may have been a breakdown in our chain of care. 4 00:00:06,177 --> 00:00:07,584 You're trying to buy us off? 5 00:00:07,608 --> 00:00:09,286 Sometimes if you're not careful... 6 00:00:09,310 --> 00:00:11,518 There's this place called camp hennessey. 7 00:00:11,542 --> 00:00:14,466 I'm not going to any stupid camp for juvenile delinquents. 8 00:00:14,490 --> 00:00:16,093 You don't have a choice. 9 00:00:16,117 --> 00:00:18,065 Past mistakes... 10 00:00:18,089 --> 00:00:19,426 We pulled it out of rockwater lake. 11 00:00:19,450 --> 00:00:21,598 I must have sold several hundred of these just like it. 12 00:00:21,622 --> 00:00:24,039 I have a list of customers' names on file. 13 00:00:24,063 --> 00:00:26,133 Will come back to haunt you. 14 00:00:26,157 --> 00:00:28,757 I won't tell anyone. I'll keep your secret, dad. 15 00:00:32,063 --> 00:00:33,680 Mary Alice: There were many things 16 00:00:33,704 --> 00:00:36,314 Gabrielle solis knew for certain. 17 00:00:38,539 --> 00:00:41,169 She knew red was her color. 18 00:00:43,214 --> 00:00:46,053 She knew diamonds went with everything. 19 00:00:46,077 --> 00:00:50,077 And she knew men were all the same. 20 00:00:53,254 --> 00:00:57,794 But the one thing Gabrielle knew above all else... 21 00:00:59,230 --> 00:01:01,590 She would never want children. 22 00:01:04,395 --> 00:01:08,115 Unfortunately for Gabrielle... 23 00:01:08,139 --> 00:01:11,769 Her husband Carlos felt differently. 24 00:01:26,086 --> 00:01:28,156 I'm so lucky to have you. 25 00:01:29,760 --> 00:01:32,199 Okay, I'll bite. 26 00:01:32,223 --> 00:01:35,172 Why are you so lucky? 27 00:01:35,196 --> 00:01:37,374 Because... 28 00:01:37,398 --> 00:01:40,107 I don't want to have kids, and you do. 29 00:01:40,131 --> 00:01:42,209 Oh, that. 30 00:01:42,233 --> 00:01:46,113 Most men would leave over something like that. 31 00:01:46,137 --> 00:01:48,315 And you're still here. 32 00:01:48,339 --> 00:01:51,118 I'm grateful. 33 00:01:51,142 --> 00:01:53,120 I know the sacrifice you're making. 34 00:01:53,144 --> 00:01:54,597 There's still a little part of me 35 00:01:54,621 --> 00:01:56,363 that's hoping you'll change your mind. 36 00:01:56,387 --> 00:01:59,196 Once you had a baby, 37 00:01:59,220 --> 00:02:01,268 I think that you would love it so much that... 38 00:02:01,292 --> 00:02:04,201 Honey, it's not going to happen. 39 00:02:04,225 --> 00:02:06,102 You never know. 40 00:02:06,126 --> 00:02:08,235 No, sometimes you do. 41 00:02:08,259 --> 00:02:10,599 Well, it is a sacrifice. 42 00:02:13,634 --> 00:02:15,514 But you're worth it. 43 00:02:20,171 --> 00:02:23,119 Yes, Gabrielle solis knew without a doubt 44 00:02:23,143 --> 00:02:25,452 she didn't want to be a mother. 45 00:02:25,476 --> 00:02:27,524 But what she couldn't know 46 00:02:27,548 --> 00:02:32,128 was just how much her husband wanted to be a father... 47 00:02:32,152 --> 00:02:34,809 Or that he'd been tampering with her birth control 48 00:02:34,833 --> 00:02:36,485 for months... 49 00:02:39,190 --> 00:02:42,230 Or that within one week's time... 50 00:02:45,496 --> 00:02:53,496 She'd be pregnant. 51 00:03:31,542 --> 00:03:34,321 Mary Alice: Saturdays on Wisteria Lane 52 00:03:34,345 --> 00:03:37,494 belonged to the children, 53 00:03:37,518 --> 00:03:39,195 and while most would spend the day 54 00:03:39,219 --> 00:03:40,767 practicing their sports... 55 00:03:40,791 --> 00:03:42,499 Oh-ho! 56 00:03:42,523 --> 00:03:46,833 And riding their bikes... 57 00:03:46,857 --> 00:03:49,336 And jumping their ropes, 58 00:03:49,360 --> 00:03:52,239 others were no longer engaged in child's play. 59 00:03:52,263 --> 00:03:55,382 Indeed, some children were being forced 60 00:03:55,406 --> 00:03:57,544 to grow up very quickly. 61 00:03:57,568 --> 00:03:59,316 Sorry to bother you on the weekend. 62 00:03:59,340 --> 00:04:01,388 We just have a few questions for you. 63 00:04:01,412 --> 00:04:03,320 About what? 64 00:04:03,344 --> 00:04:04,621 12 years ago, 65 00:04:04,645 --> 00:04:07,694 your late wife purchased a toy chest. 66 00:04:07,718 --> 00:04:11,358 Toy chest? 67 00:04:11,382 --> 00:04:12,929 Yeah, it was about this big, 68 00:04:12,953 --> 00:04:14,940 had little dancing bears on it. 69 00:04:14,964 --> 00:04:18,435 Gosh, I'm sorry. 70 00:04:18,459 --> 00:04:20,367 The craftsman who makes these chests 71 00:04:20,391 --> 00:04:22,339 keeps a list of customers. 72 00:04:22,363 --> 00:04:25,542 Apparently, you purchased one in August 1992. 73 00:04:25,566 --> 00:04:28,545 Yeah, we'd like to know where that chest is now. 74 00:04:28,569 --> 00:04:31,678 Wow, I, um, I wish I could help you. 75 00:04:31,702 --> 00:04:34,281 I don't recall any toy chest. 76 00:04:34,305 --> 00:04:36,723 I remember. 77 00:04:36,747 --> 00:04:40,327 Yeah, it had little bears and balloons on it, right? Yeah, son, that's right. 78 00:04:40,351 --> 00:04:42,959 Yeah, we threw that chest away when I was little. 79 00:04:42,983 --> 00:04:44,740 I was standing on it, and it just busted. 80 00:04:44,764 --> 00:04:46,533 Remember, dad? 81 00:04:46,557 --> 00:04:48,287 Vaguely. 82 00:04:49,990 --> 00:04:54,000 I guess that's all, then. 83 00:04:54,024 --> 00:04:57,874 Thank you both for your time. 84 00:04:57,898 --> 00:05:01,378 Hey, what's the deal with this chest, anyway? 85 00:05:01,402 --> 00:05:03,450 One just like you had washed up on torch lake. 86 00:05:03,474 --> 00:05:04,981 Had a woman in it. 87 00:05:05,005 --> 00:05:06,505 A woman? 88 00:05:09,340 --> 00:05:11,680 She was all chopped up. 89 00:05:20,991 --> 00:05:23,821 Obviously, we need to talk. 90 00:05:29,760 --> 00:05:31,438 You lied to me. 91 00:05:31,462 --> 00:05:33,039 You said that it was a man in the box. 92 00:05:33,063 --> 00:05:34,581 No, I didn't lie. 93 00:05:34,605 --> 00:05:36,383 Well, the policeman said that it was a woman's body. 94 00:05:36,407 --> 00:05:37,484 Of course you were lying. 95 00:05:37,508 --> 00:05:38,645 I told you a private detective had come 96 00:05:38,669 --> 00:05:40,647 to take you away from us. 97 00:05:40,671 --> 00:05:42,589 I never said it was a man. 98 00:05:42,613 --> 00:05:43,590 You didn't? 99 00:05:43,614 --> 00:05:44,951 No. 100 00:05:44,975 --> 00:05:46,823 Well, I-I thought that... no. 101 00:05:46,847 --> 00:05:48,324 No, stop. Please... stop. 102 00:05:48,348 --> 00:05:50,527 I-I... look, I know that you're lying to me, okay? 103 00:05:50,551 --> 00:05:52,499 I-I know that you're lying. 104 00:05:52,523 --> 00:05:53,630 For the last time, 105 00:05:53,654 --> 00:05:56,007 someone came and tried to take you away from us. 106 00:05:56,031 --> 00:05:57,604 Yes, a woman. A woman came. 107 00:05:57,628 --> 00:05:59,506 Yes, she tried to steal you 108 00:05:59,530 --> 00:06:02,869 from the only family that you've ever really known. 109 00:06:02,893 --> 00:06:04,920 And we couldn't let that happen, 110 00:06:04,944 --> 00:06:06,943 and we didn't. 111 00:06:06,967 --> 00:06:08,415 And that... 112 00:06:08,439 --> 00:06:11,969 Is the truth. 113 00:06:16,977 --> 00:06:19,085 Rex: We can't cancel now. It's two days away. 114 00:06:19,109 --> 00:06:21,458 Rex, I'm not going. That's all there is to it. 115 00:06:21,482 --> 00:06:23,730 Counseling is part of the treatment 116 00:06:23,754 --> 00:06:26,398 at camp hennessey. You knew that. Nowhere in that brochure 117 00:06:26,422 --> 00:06:28,465 did it say that we were expected to attend. 118 00:06:28,489 --> 00:06:30,637 What's Andrew going to think if you don't show up? 119 00:06:30,661 --> 00:06:32,569 Well, I am making him this care package. 120 00:06:32,593 --> 00:06:34,746 I mean, he'll know that I'm thinking about him. 121 00:06:34,770 --> 00:06:36,643 Why are you putting in lemon squares? 122 00:06:36,667 --> 00:06:38,445 They told us not to send him sweets. 123 00:06:38,469 --> 00:06:40,477 Well, I don't understand why. 124 00:06:40,501 --> 00:06:42,378 I guess they feel baked goods from mom 125 00:06:42,402 --> 00:06:43,950 undercut the boot camp experience. 126 00:06:43,974 --> 00:06:47,118 Fine. I won't send them, but I think it's a stupid rule. 127 00:06:47,142 --> 00:06:49,055 So are you going to this thing or not? 128 00:06:49,079 --> 00:06:50,457 No. Why? 129 00:06:50,481 --> 00:06:52,388 Because the minute I get there, 130 00:06:52,412 --> 00:06:55,169 Andrew will start attacking me for abandoning him. 131 00:06:55,193 --> 00:06:57,464 And I don't want to hear it. 132 00:06:57,488 --> 00:06:59,566 There's no reason to feel guilty, you know. 133 00:06:59,590 --> 00:07:01,698 You did everything you could for him. 134 00:07:01,722 --> 00:07:04,562 I don't feel guilty. 135 00:07:07,598 --> 00:07:08,998 Okay. 136 00:07:22,473 --> 00:07:24,420 Please, christie, there's no way 137 00:07:24,444 --> 00:07:26,201 that I can get another babysitter 138 00:07:26,225 --> 00:07:29,596 this late in the day... Parker, knock it off. 139 00:07:29,620 --> 00:07:30,957 No. 140 00:07:30,981 --> 00:07:33,760 Because I'm having drinks with friends 141 00:07:33,784 --> 00:07:36,102 I used to work with, and they never called, 142 00:07:36,126 --> 00:07:37,834 and if I blow them off, that's it, I'll just... 143 00:07:37,858 --> 00:07:39,806 I'm dead to them. 144 00:07:39,830 --> 00:07:43,810 No, I can't call Patty binks. 145 00:07:43,834 --> 00:07:45,712 Because she steals things. 146 00:07:45,736 --> 00:07:47,544 Damn it, christie, you're 13 years old. 147 00:07:47,568 --> 00:07:49,946 You've got a lot of trips to the mall ahead of you. 148 00:07:49,970 --> 00:07:53,820 Okay, okay, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I raised my voice. 149 00:07:53,844 --> 00:07:56,122 I'm calm. 150 00:07:56,146 --> 00:07:58,685 So I'm starting to think that this is about money. 151 00:07:58,709 --> 00:08:01,758 So what is it that would make it worth your while? 152 00:08:01,782 --> 00:08:03,630 $100? Well, that's extortion. 153 00:08:03,654 --> 00:08:07,494 There's no way in hell that I'm going to... hello? 154 00:08:07,518 --> 00:08:08,818 Hello? 155 00:08:11,161 --> 00:08:12,939 Parker, I swear, I will spank you. 156 00:08:12,963 --> 00:08:14,673 Knock it off. 157 00:08:16,667 --> 00:08:19,175 Hi, Mrs. Binks. Is Patty there? 158 00:08:19,199 --> 00:08:20,669 Thank you. 159 00:08:22,502 --> 00:08:26,152 Hi, honey. I'm back. 160 00:08:26,176 --> 00:08:27,854 Hey, sweetie. 161 00:08:27,878 --> 00:08:30,557 This is Mr. Steinberg, the attorney from the hospital. 162 00:08:30,581 --> 00:08:32,689 Oh, have we met? 163 00:08:32,713 --> 00:08:34,991 Yes, Mrs. Solis. We've met. 164 00:08:35,015 --> 00:08:36,963 Don't you remember? 165 00:08:36,987 --> 00:08:39,025 It was after mama died. 166 00:08:39,049 --> 00:08:41,998 Apparently, the hospital was negligent 167 00:08:42,022 --> 00:08:44,500 and agreed to a 7-figure settlement check, 168 00:08:44,524 --> 00:08:47,203 a check I was never told about. 169 00:08:47,227 --> 00:08:50,197 Oh, that. 170 00:08:51,602 --> 00:08:54,140 Uh... 171 00:08:54,164 --> 00:08:55,982 Mr. Steinberg... 172 00:08:56,006 --> 00:08:58,636 I was just leaving. 173 00:09:10,320 --> 00:09:11,297 What were you thinking?! 174 00:09:11,321 --> 00:09:13,099 Wait, just let me explain... 175 00:09:13,123 --> 00:09:14,661 No, why the hell didn't you tell me?! 176 00:09:14,685 --> 00:09:16,563 Because I couldn't trust you to make the right decision. 177 00:09:16,587 --> 00:09:18,635 The right decision was to use that money for my lawyers! 178 00:09:18,659 --> 00:09:20,607 We could have fought the indictment, 179 00:09:20,631 --> 00:09:22,769 and then I wouldn't have had to take the plea bargain! 180 00:09:22,793 --> 00:09:24,971 If you didn't take the plea deal, 181 00:09:24,995 --> 00:09:26,242 the government would have seized the settlement. 182 00:09:26,266 --> 00:09:27,313 Oh, we could have fought that in court. 183 00:09:27,337 --> 00:09:28,715 Exactly, and then you would have 184 00:09:28,739 --> 00:09:29,646 blown all the money on the lawyers. 185 00:09:29,670 --> 00:09:30,817 Who cares?! 186 00:09:30,841 --> 00:09:32,619 If there was a chance I didn't have to go to jail. 187 00:09:32,643 --> 00:09:35,130 You had Laotian convicts sewing casual wear 188 00:09:35,154 --> 00:09:36,583 for 2 cents an hour. 189 00:09:36,607 --> 00:09:38,655 Don't you think you deserve a time-out? 190 00:09:38,679 --> 00:09:40,286 Eight months. 191 00:09:40,310 --> 00:09:43,830 Thanks to you, I'm going away for eight months. 192 00:09:43,854 --> 00:09:45,331 And when you get out, 193 00:09:45,355 --> 00:09:47,636 we're going to have money to start over with thanks to me. 194 00:09:49,219 --> 00:09:52,839 You know, once you calm down, 195 00:09:52,863 --> 00:09:55,647 you're going to realize I did the right thing, 196 00:09:55,671 --> 00:09:58,926 and when that happens, I'd appreciate an apology. 197 00:10:14,344 --> 00:10:15,994 Grandma's here. 198 00:10:25,255 --> 00:10:29,135 Now, that is just perfect. 199 00:10:29,159 --> 00:10:30,799 Stay put. 200 00:10:33,203 --> 00:10:35,081 I am so sorry. 201 00:10:35,105 --> 00:10:36,913 Hey, mom. 202 00:10:36,937 --> 00:10:39,315 Oh, hey, susie. 203 00:10:39,339 --> 00:10:40,887 Mm, I goofed. 204 00:10:40,911 --> 00:10:42,348 What happened? 205 00:10:42,372 --> 00:10:44,220 Oh, you know me. 206 00:10:44,244 --> 00:10:46,061 No depth perception whatsoever. 207 00:10:46,085 --> 00:10:49,025 I'm stunned they even issued me a license. 208 00:10:49,049 --> 00:10:50,356 So you're Susan's mom. 209 00:10:50,380 --> 00:10:52,759 Yeah. 210 00:10:52,783 --> 00:10:54,910 I'm Sophie bremer. And you are... 211 00:10:54,934 --> 00:10:56,362 Mike Delfino. 212 00:10:56,386 --> 00:10:58,364 Oh. 213 00:10:58,388 --> 00:10:59,666 You're Mike? 214 00:10:59,690 --> 00:11:01,267 Oh, my god! 215 00:11:01,291 --> 00:11:04,010 Susan's told me so much about you. 216 00:11:04,034 --> 00:11:07,143 Well, don't just stand there. Give me a hug. 217 00:11:07,167 --> 00:11:08,144 Oh. 218 00:11:08,168 --> 00:11:09,916 Oh! 219 00:11:09,940 --> 00:11:12,418 Mom, uh... 220 00:11:12,442 --> 00:11:15,321 Mike and I aren't together anymore. 221 00:11:15,345 --> 00:11:17,754 Oh. 222 00:11:17,778 --> 00:11:19,425 I'm sorry. 223 00:11:19,449 --> 00:11:23,930 I-I guess I just made this pretty awkward, huh? 224 00:11:23,954 --> 00:11:25,992 Yeah, you... you really did. 225 00:11:26,016 --> 00:11:27,994 So let's just call the insurance company. 226 00:11:28,018 --> 00:11:29,766 Okay. 227 00:11:29,790 --> 00:11:31,167 Well... 228 00:11:31,191 --> 00:11:33,399 It's nice meeting you anyway, Mike. 229 00:11:33,423 --> 00:11:34,841 Yeah. You too. 230 00:11:34,865 --> 00:11:37,443 And I never would have guessed that you're Susan's mom. 231 00:11:37,467 --> 00:11:39,305 I know. I look too young. 232 00:11:39,329 --> 00:11:41,778 I got pregnant when I was a tiny teenager. 233 00:11:41,802 --> 00:11:43,449 Okay. 234 00:11:43,473 --> 00:11:45,186 It was the first time I got drunk... ever. 235 00:11:45,210 --> 00:11:46,352 Can you believe it? 236 00:11:46,376 --> 00:11:47,814 Let's go. 237 00:11:47,838 --> 00:11:48,885 Her father was a marine. 238 00:11:48,909 --> 00:11:51,818 Afterwards, he gave me three of his medals. 239 00:11:51,842 --> 00:11:54,690 Mom. Ha ha ha! What? 240 00:11:54,714 --> 00:11:57,031 Let's just go inside and call the insurance company. 241 00:11:57,055 --> 00:11:59,817 Oh, right. 242 00:12:07,898 --> 00:12:09,806 What are you smiling about? 243 00:12:09,830 --> 00:12:11,778 I used to have all these questions 244 00:12:11,802 --> 00:12:13,902 about how you got to be the way you are. 245 00:12:15,165 --> 00:12:18,035 They were all just answered. 246 00:12:40,260 --> 00:12:42,530 Hi! Ha ha ha ha ha. 247 00:12:44,094 --> 00:12:45,804 Hi. 248 00:12:47,167 --> 00:12:48,975 Hi. Ha ha. 249 00:12:48,999 --> 00:12:50,777 What's going on? 250 00:12:50,801 --> 00:12:53,419 Oh, um... 251 00:12:53,443 --> 00:12:54,956 My babysitter canceled. 252 00:12:54,980 --> 00:12:57,283 Oh, Lynette, i-I'm so swamped today. 253 00:12:57,307 --> 00:12:58,925 My... my house is a mess, 254 00:12:58,949 --> 00:13:01,257 and I've got millions of errands to run, so... 255 00:13:01,281 --> 00:13:03,259 Please hear me out. This is important. 256 00:13:03,283 --> 00:13:05,940 Today I have a chance to rejoin the human race 257 00:13:05,964 --> 00:13:08,895 for a few hours. There are actual adults 258 00:13:08,919 --> 00:13:10,236 waiting for me with margaritas. 259 00:13:10,260 --> 00:13:12,498 Look, I'm in a dress. I have makeup on. 260 00:13:12,522 --> 00:13:14,540 If it were any other day... 261 00:13:14,564 --> 00:13:16,904 Oh, for god's sakes, Bree, I'm wearing pantyhose. 262 00:13:19,269 --> 00:13:21,177 Bring them in. 263 00:13:21,201 --> 00:13:24,350 Thank you, thank you. Okay, in you go. 264 00:13:24,374 --> 00:13:26,461 And then the police showed me his mug shot. 265 00:13:26,485 --> 00:13:27,914 No. 266 00:13:27,938 --> 00:13:29,856 Yes. Mike served time for selling drugs 267 00:13:29,880 --> 00:13:31,017 and manslaughter. 268 00:13:31,041 --> 00:13:32,819 I can't believe it. 269 00:13:32,843 --> 00:13:34,190 Well, it's true. 270 00:13:34,214 --> 00:13:36,863 He has such nice manners, you know? 271 00:13:36,887 --> 00:13:38,424 I know. 272 00:13:38,448 --> 00:13:39,795 Susie... 273 00:13:39,819 --> 00:13:41,968 I don't want you worrying too much 274 00:13:41,992 --> 00:13:44,130 about this Mike thing. 275 00:13:44,154 --> 00:13:47,904 The right man will come along. 276 00:13:47,928 --> 00:13:49,575 Just give it time. 277 00:13:49,599 --> 00:13:51,207 I think I would have given up entirely 278 00:13:51,231 --> 00:13:52,979 if it weren't for you and morty. 279 00:13:53,003 --> 00:13:54,410 Morty? 280 00:13:54,434 --> 00:13:56,012 Yeah, you know. 281 00:13:56,036 --> 00:13:57,984 It's the third time around for both of you, 282 00:13:58,008 --> 00:13:59,846 and you're really clicking. 283 00:13:59,870 --> 00:14:02,440 Ugh. Gives me hope. 284 00:14:05,245 --> 00:14:07,053 What's wrong? 285 00:14:07,077 --> 00:14:08,254 Nothing, nothing. 286 00:14:08,278 --> 00:14:10,056 Um, I'm just... 287 00:14:10,080 --> 00:14:11,397 I'm, uh, tired. 288 00:14:11,421 --> 00:14:14,351 You're not tired. You took a nap. What is it? 289 00:14:16,356 --> 00:14:18,404 I left morty. 290 00:14:18,428 --> 00:14:19,535 What? 291 00:14:19,559 --> 00:14:20,566 Why? 292 00:14:20,590 --> 00:14:22,568 Because he shoved me. 293 00:14:22,592 --> 00:14:24,871 Morty? No. 294 00:14:24,895 --> 00:14:26,372 You think I'm lying? 295 00:14:26,396 --> 00:14:27,373 Fine. 296 00:14:27,397 --> 00:14:29,075 Why would he shove you? 297 00:14:29,099 --> 00:14:30,376 Because I confronted him 298 00:14:30,400 --> 00:14:31,918 about how much time he's spending 299 00:14:31,942 --> 00:14:34,320 at that damn pancake restaurant... 300 00:14:34,344 --> 00:14:36,852 If that's where he's really been. 301 00:14:36,876 --> 00:14:39,185 Oh, you can't be serious. Morty? 302 00:14:39,209 --> 00:14:41,557 You think men his age don't have needs? 303 00:14:41,581 --> 00:14:43,589 You should see the waitresses he hires. 304 00:14:43,613 --> 00:14:46,062 Every year, they get younger and younger. 305 00:14:46,086 --> 00:14:47,463 Well, maybe you just feel that way 306 00:14:47,487 --> 00:14:48,935 'cause every year you get older and older. 307 00:14:48,959 --> 00:14:51,167 Well, that's a horrible thing to say. 308 00:14:51,191 --> 00:14:53,039 I'm sorry. 309 00:14:53,063 --> 00:14:54,910 I'm not that old. I said I was sorry. 310 00:14:54,934 --> 00:14:57,273 People think we're sisters. 311 00:14:57,297 --> 00:14:59,575 Well, that's 'cause you tell them that. 312 00:14:59,599 --> 00:15:00,907 One time. 313 00:15:00,931 --> 00:15:02,648 Ha ha. You've got to let go of that. 314 00:15:02,672 --> 00:15:05,051 Okay, look, I am just saying 315 00:15:05,075 --> 00:15:07,914 that I don't think morty cheated on you. 316 00:15:07,938 --> 00:15:10,016 Well, he did shove me. 317 00:15:10,040 --> 00:15:12,458 And the least you can do is be supportive. 318 00:15:12,482 --> 00:15:14,090 You're right. 319 00:15:14,114 --> 00:15:15,521 You're right. 320 00:15:15,545 --> 00:15:17,463 He also threw a book at me. 321 00:15:17,487 --> 00:15:18,965 Oh, come on. 322 00:15:18,989 --> 00:15:20,096 Hey... ah. 323 00:15:20,120 --> 00:15:23,029 I mean... 324 00:15:23,053 --> 00:15:24,971 He shouldn't have done that. 325 00:15:24,995 --> 00:15:26,995 Ha. Thank you. 326 00:15:40,570 --> 00:15:41,988 Porter, honey, those cookies are hot. 327 00:15:42,012 --> 00:15:43,990 Just wait a few minutes, 328 00:15:44,014 --> 00:15:46,001 and then I'll give you one when they're cool, okay? 329 00:15:46,025 --> 00:15:48,224 Um... 330 00:15:48,248 --> 00:15:50,056 You know, pictures are prettier 331 00:15:50,080 --> 00:15:51,950 if you color inside the lines. 332 00:15:55,025 --> 00:15:58,955 Well, art is subjective. 333 00:16:00,660 --> 00:16:02,938 Porter, what did I tell you? 334 00:16:02,962 --> 00:16:04,110 But I'm hungry. 335 00:16:04,134 --> 00:16:05,972 Well, then, I will fix you 336 00:16:05,996 --> 00:16:08,444 a very nice bowl of peaches and cottage cheese. 337 00:16:08,468 --> 00:16:10,116 Ew, barf. 338 00:16:10,140 --> 00:16:12,578 Don't be common, young man. Now come on. 339 00:16:12,602 --> 00:16:14,950 If you play around with those cookies one more time, 340 00:16:14,974 --> 00:16:16,331 I'm going to have to spank you. 341 00:16:16,355 --> 00:16:17,953 We don't get spanked. 342 00:16:17,977 --> 00:16:19,155 Really? 343 00:16:19,179 --> 00:16:20,956 Mommy always says she's going to, 344 00:16:20,980 --> 00:16:22,588 but she never does. 345 00:16:22,612 --> 00:16:24,530 Well, I am not your mommy, 346 00:16:24,554 --> 00:16:26,541 and if you misbehave in my house, 347 00:16:26,565 --> 00:16:29,065 you will get spanked. 348 00:16:29,089 --> 00:16:32,398 So be good. 349 00:16:32,422 --> 00:16:34,000 How's my girl? 350 00:16:34,024 --> 00:16:35,401 How are you doing? 351 00:16:48,338 --> 00:16:50,356 It was an accident. 352 00:16:50,380 --> 00:16:53,059 Porter, I warned you. 353 00:16:53,083 --> 00:16:54,190 I'm sorry. I'll be good. 354 00:16:54,214 --> 00:16:58,694 Those cookies were made from scratch. 355 00:16:58,718 --> 00:17:01,527 Your fate is sealed. 356 00:17:01,551 --> 00:17:03,229 Come here. 357 00:17:03,253 --> 00:17:05,071 No, no! 358 00:17:05,095 --> 00:17:06,072 Ow! 359 00:17:06,096 --> 00:17:07,073 Ow! 360 00:17:07,097 --> 00:17:08,074 Ow! 361 00:17:08,098 --> 00:17:09,198 Ow! 362 00:17:12,162 --> 00:17:13,239 What's that? 363 00:17:13,263 --> 00:17:17,083 It's called a post-nuptial agreement. 364 00:17:17,107 --> 00:17:18,084 It's a legal document that... 365 00:17:18,108 --> 00:17:20,516 No, I know what a post-nup is. 366 00:17:20,540 --> 00:17:23,289 What is it doing on my coffee table? 367 00:17:23,313 --> 00:17:25,556 Well, I can forgive that stunt you pulled 368 00:17:25,580 --> 00:17:27,123 with the settlement check 369 00:17:27,147 --> 00:17:28,594 if I'm sure that you'll really be around 370 00:17:28,618 --> 00:17:30,256 when I get out of jail. 371 00:17:30,280 --> 00:17:32,298 Hmm. 372 00:17:32,322 --> 00:17:37,163 And the post-nup changes the terms of the pre-nup, so... 373 00:17:37,187 --> 00:17:40,136 So if you try and divorce me while I'm gone, 374 00:17:40,160 --> 00:17:41,367 you get nothing. 375 00:17:41,391 --> 00:17:44,310 You don't trust me? 376 00:17:44,334 --> 00:17:46,072 Afraid not. 377 00:17:46,096 --> 00:17:47,413 Well, that's too bad, 378 00:17:47,437 --> 00:17:49,475 because I'm not signing that piece of paper. 379 00:17:49,499 --> 00:17:53,119 You're a very beautiful woman, Gabrielle, 380 00:17:53,143 --> 00:17:55,181 but... 381 00:17:55,205 --> 00:17:58,084 You're not very bright. 382 00:17:58,108 --> 00:18:00,626 See, if you don't sign it, 383 00:18:00,650 --> 00:18:02,788 I'll pull the plug on the settlement agreement, 384 00:18:02,812 --> 00:18:04,690 divorce you, 385 00:18:04,714 --> 00:18:07,201 and then you get what amounts to about 50% 386 00:18:07,225 --> 00:18:09,765 of our current savings, 387 00:18:09,789 --> 00:18:12,538 which is basically nothing. 388 00:18:12,562 --> 00:18:17,373 So what do you expect to happen right now, Carlos... 389 00:18:17,397 --> 00:18:21,107 Sign the paper and jump right back into your arms? 390 00:18:21,131 --> 00:18:23,349 Baby, it doesn't mean that I don't love you. 391 00:18:23,373 --> 00:18:27,283 You know I think you're the perfect woman. 392 00:18:30,440 --> 00:18:33,219 Oh, but I'm not. 393 00:18:33,243 --> 00:18:35,323 I have flaws. 394 00:18:37,116 --> 00:18:38,224 Flaws? 395 00:18:38,248 --> 00:18:39,325 Mm-hmm. 396 00:18:39,349 --> 00:18:41,197 I'll even give you an example. 397 00:18:41,221 --> 00:18:43,329 Remember the time when you were in jail 398 00:18:43,353 --> 00:18:46,207 and you told me about your secret compartment, 399 00:18:46,231 --> 00:18:48,374 and you told me to burn the papers 400 00:18:48,398 --> 00:18:51,177 that I found in there? 401 00:18:51,201 --> 00:18:53,479 Well, me being pretty, and therefore stupid, 402 00:18:53,503 --> 00:18:54,740 I forgot. 403 00:18:54,764 --> 00:18:57,683 You didn't burn the papers. 404 00:18:57,707 --> 00:18:59,185 Worse. 405 00:18:59,209 --> 00:19:01,187 I read them. 406 00:19:01,211 --> 00:19:03,619 Okay, okay... you have some nerve talking to me about trust, 407 00:19:03,643 --> 00:19:05,326 when you have a secret bank account 408 00:19:05,350 --> 00:19:06,622 in the Cayman Islands. 409 00:19:06,646 --> 00:19:08,524 That was a safety net for both of us. 410 00:19:08,548 --> 00:19:10,125 I'll bet. 411 00:19:10,149 --> 00:19:12,127 Have you told anyone else about this? 412 00:19:12,151 --> 00:19:13,299 No, but I could. 413 00:19:13,323 --> 00:19:15,236 Hey, is that why the prosecution 414 00:19:15,260 --> 00:19:17,233 didn't have a case against you? 415 00:19:17,257 --> 00:19:19,305 They couldn't find the profits you made. 416 00:19:19,329 --> 00:19:21,136 So if I were you, Carlos, 417 00:19:21,160 --> 00:19:23,209 I wouldn't mention the words "divorce," 418 00:19:23,233 --> 00:19:26,812 "trust," or "post-nup" ever again. 419 00:19:26,836 --> 00:19:29,396 You don't want to piss me off. 420 00:19:36,676 --> 00:19:38,824 I know, baby. 421 00:19:38,848 --> 00:19:40,648 It hurts to lose. 422 00:19:53,263 --> 00:19:54,670 Ante up. 423 00:19:54,694 --> 00:19:56,902 Well, look at me. 424 00:19:56,926 --> 00:20:00,946 Finally in on one of your legendary poker parties. 425 00:20:00,970 --> 00:20:04,210 Susan's always telling me how much fun you girls have. 426 00:20:04,234 --> 00:20:05,517 The rules are simple... 427 00:20:05,541 --> 00:20:07,483 We play for cash, the dealer picks the game, 428 00:20:07,507 --> 00:20:09,855 and unsubstantiated gossip is encouraged. 429 00:20:09,879 --> 00:20:11,186 Ah. 430 00:20:11,210 --> 00:20:13,289 Bree, thanks again for watching my boys. 431 00:20:13,313 --> 00:20:15,696 Are you sure they weren't too much to handle? 432 00:20:15,720 --> 00:20:17,763 Oh, no, we had a wonderful time, 433 00:20:17,787 --> 00:20:19,194 although I think Porter had a little less fun. 434 00:20:19,218 --> 00:20:21,196 Okay, I'll bet. 435 00:20:21,220 --> 00:20:23,899 So, Sophie, Susan says you guys are going to the spa tomorrow. 436 00:20:23,923 --> 00:20:25,271 Is that an all-day thing? 437 00:20:25,295 --> 00:20:26,732 What do you mean, Porter had less fun? 438 00:20:26,756 --> 00:20:28,234 I'll raise. 439 00:20:28,258 --> 00:20:29,705 Well, he was misbehaving, 440 00:20:29,729 --> 00:20:31,237 so I had to punish him. 441 00:20:31,261 --> 00:20:33,208 So, yes, Susan is treating me 442 00:20:33,232 --> 00:20:34,740 to an entire day of beauty... 443 00:20:34,764 --> 00:20:36,387 So when you say punishment, 444 00:20:36,411 --> 00:20:38,213 what exactly are we talking about? 445 00:20:38,237 --> 00:20:40,846 Oh, I had to spank him. 446 00:20:40,870 --> 00:20:42,418 Okay, I will re-raise. 447 00:20:42,442 --> 00:20:45,352 You spanked my son? 448 00:20:48,318 --> 00:20:50,726 Las precis spa. Ha ha. 449 00:20:50,750 --> 00:20:52,750 Yep, that's where we're going. 450 00:20:55,455 --> 00:20:57,533 Lynette, is there a problem? 451 00:20:57,557 --> 00:20:58,934 Tom and I don't believe in hitting our kids. 452 00:20:58,958 --> 00:21:00,336 I thought you knew that. 453 00:21:00,360 --> 00:21:02,468 Sorry. I-I didn't know. 454 00:21:02,492 --> 00:21:04,792 It won't happen again. 455 00:21:06,696 --> 00:21:08,274 Of course, I'm somewhat surprised 456 00:21:08,298 --> 00:21:09,615 you don't spank them. 457 00:21:09,639 --> 00:21:12,348 I mean, everybody knows they're a little bit... 458 00:21:12,372 --> 00:21:13,642 Out of control. 459 00:21:14,674 --> 00:21:17,252 Wow, I'm just dragging today. 460 00:21:17,276 --> 00:21:19,785 Should we put on another pot of coffee? 461 00:21:19,809 --> 00:21:21,809 Yeah, I'll do it. 462 00:21:22,882 --> 00:21:24,990 I'll... I'll fold. 463 00:21:25,014 --> 00:21:26,992 You know, you're right, Bree. 464 00:21:27,016 --> 00:21:29,335 I've got a lot to learn about parenting, 465 00:21:29,359 --> 00:21:31,337 and I feel so blessed to be getting sage advice 466 00:21:31,361 --> 00:21:32,538 from such an impeccable mother like you. 467 00:21:32,562 --> 00:21:35,341 I mean, your kids turned out perfect, 468 00:21:35,365 --> 00:21:38,043 as long as you don't count Andrew. Where is he again? 469 00:21:38,067 --> 00:21:40,346 Hmm? 470 00:21:40,370 --> 00:21:42,848 Some kind of a boot camp for juvenile delinquents? 471 00:21:42,872 --> 00:21:44,880 Okay, girls. 472 00:21:44,904 --> 00:21:46,852 I never said I was perfect. 473 00:21:46,876 --> 00:21:48,354 Oh, honey, nobody's blaming you. 474 00:21:48,378 --> 00:21:49,715 The hell I'm not. 475 00:21:49,739 --> 00:21:51,309 Lynette. 476 00:21:56,416 --> 00:22:01,316 If you will excuse me... 477 00:22:03,353 --> 00:22:06,001 Lynette, will you go after her? 478 00:22:06,025 --> 00:22:07,773 She spanked my son. 479 00:22:07,797 --> 00:22:11,397 I'm not apologizing. 480 00:22:15,004 --> 00:22:19,385 Usually poker is more fun than this. 481 00:22:19,409 --> 00:22:21,587 So help me, if you don't back me up on this, 482 00:22:21,611 --> 00:22:23,048 I will lose it. 483 00:22:23,072 --> 00:22:25,426 Yes, Bree shouldn't have spanked Porter, 484 00:22:25,450 --> 00:22:27,393 but it's not like she hurt him. 485 00:22:27,417 --> 00:22:28,854 That is not the point. 486 00:22:28,878 --> 00:22:30,856 You don't spank other people's children. 487 00:22:30,880 --> 00:22:34,329 He was misbehaving. She had to do something. 488 00:22:34,353 --> 00:22:35,801 B-But make no mistake, 489 00:22:35,825 --> 00:22:37,933 she definitely crossed the line. 490 00:22:37,957 --> 00:22:39,334 Yeah, you're damn right she did. 491 00:22:39,358 --> 00:22:40,936 She could have tried something else, 492 00:22:40,960 --> 00:22:42,668 like a time-out, or she could have simply 493 00:22:42,692 --> 00:22:44,339 threatened to spank him. 494 00:22:44,363 --> 00:22:47,350 Yeah, 'cause that works out so well when we do it. 495 00:22:47,374 --> 00:22:48,874 It does work. 496 00:22:48,898 --> 00:22:51,517 It does work most of the time. 497 00:22:51,541 --> 00:22:52,678 It used to work. 498 00:22:52,702 --> 00:22:54,349 They've figured out that it's an empty threat. 499 00:22:54,373 --> 00:22:55,551 They're onto us. 500 00:22:55,575 --> 00:22:57,853 My mom used to beat the hell 501 00:22:57,877 --> 00:22:59,925 out of my sisters and me, 502 00:22:59,949 --> 00:23:01,979 and I won't do it. 503 00:23:03,813 --> 00:23:05,823 I will not become my mother. 504 00:23:09,719 --> 00:23:11,697 Fine. 505 00:23:11,721 --> 00:23:14,940 But the boys are getting older and smarter, 506 00:23:14,964 --> 00:23:16,472 and eventually... 507 00:23:16,496 --> 00:23:18,544 Believe me, eventually they're going to figure out 508 00:23:18,568 --> 00:23:20,105 that they outnumber us, and then... 509 00:23:20,129 --> 00:23:22,808 We're screwed. 510 00:23:22,832 --> 00:23:25,951 Exactly. 511 00:23:38,588 --> 00:23:40,125 Excuse me, Zachary. 512 00:23:40,149 --> 00:23:42,668 Would you mind helping me with these bags? 513 00:23:42,692 --> 00:23:45,739 There's some banana bread in it for you if you do. 514 00:23:45,763 --> 00:23:49,555 Uh, yeah, sure. 515 00:23:51,501 --> 00:23:53,479 This is really good, Mrs. Tillman. 516 00:23:53,503 --> 00:23:54,780 Thanks a lot. 517 00:23:54,804 --> 00:23:56,147 You're welcome, Zachary. 518 00:23:56,171 --> 00:23:58,143 You know, I've never actually been 519 00:23:58,167 --> 00:23:59,445 in Mrs. Huber's house before. 520 00:23:59,469 --> 00:24:01,887 Obviously, you haven't missed much. 521 00:24:01,911 --> 00:24:06,451 This is the place where good taste goes to die. 522 00:24:08,578 --> 00:24:10,696 So... 523 00:24:10,720 --> 00:24:13,499 I heard you and your father arguing the other day. 524 00:24:13,523 --> 00:24:15,030 Everything all right at home? 525 00:24:15,054 --> 00:24:18,864 Yeah. We just have problems sometimes. 526 00:24:18,888 --> 00:24:21,937 I bet you miss your mother. 527 00:24:21,961 --> 00:24:24,770 I'm sure things were... 528 00:24:24,794 --> 00:24:28,013 Different when she was alive. 529 00:24:28,037 --> 00:24:32,117 Such a warm, loving woman. 530 00:24:32,141 --> 00:24:34,501 Y-You... 531 00:24:36,606 --> 00:24:38,554 Knew my mother? 532 00:24:38,578 --> 00:24:41,126 Yep. Years ago in Utah. 533 00:24:41,150 --> 00:24:42,788 We worked together. 534 00:24:42,812 --> 00:24:45,631 I didn't know that. 535 00:24:45,655 --> 00:24:48,534 It's true. 536 00:24:48,558 --> 00:24:51,537 In fact... 537 00:24:51,561 --> 00:24:54,600 I'll tell you a secret. 538 00:24:54,624 --> 00:24:58,043 I once met you when you were a little baby. 539 00:24:58,067 --> 00:25:00,606 Really? 540 00:25:00,630 --> 00:25:02,500 Mm-hmm. 541 00:25:04,534 --> 00:25:08,514 Your mother loved you so much, Zachary. 542 00:25:10,680 --> 00:25:13,488 Of all the things I remember, 543 00:25:13,512 --> 00:25:17,552 I remember that the most. 544 00:25:26,596 --> 00:25:32,678 You want to know what else I remember? 545 00:25:32,702 --> 00:25:34,680 How lovely 546 00:25:34,704 --> 00:25:37,544 your original name was. 547 00:25:43,212 --> 00:25:45,542 Dana. 548 00:26:02,561 --> 00:26:04,570 Isn't this nice? 549 00:26:04,594 --> 00:26:07,251 Oh, just the two of us girls hanging out, 550 00:26:07,275 --> 00:26:08,644 getting pretty. 551 00:26:08,668 --> 00:26:11,146 Oh, thank you. 552 00:26:11,170 --> 00:26:14,119 My pleasure. 553 00:26:14,143 --> 00:26:16,652 So I was thinking 554 00:26:16,676 --> 00:26:18,724 maybe you should call morty. 555 00:26:18,748 --> 00:26:21,256 You know, get started working things out. 556 00:26:21,280 --> 00:26:23,989 Why would I want to work things out 557 00:26:24,013 --> 00:26:25,791 with a man who abuses me? 558 00:26:27,657 --> 00:26:30,666 Oh, you don't have to gasp. My mother exaggerates. 559 00:26:30,690 --> 00:26:33,038 She won't be happy till I have bruises. 560 00:26:33,062 --> 00:26:35,676 Okay, um, can we just focus? What I want to know is 561 00:26:35,700 --> 00:26:38,143 have you thought about what's going to happen 562 00:26:38,167 --> 00:26:40,706 if you don't go back to morty? 563 00:26:40,730 --> 00:26:42,708 Ha ha. What do you mean? 564 00:26:42,732 --> 00:26:44,980 Well, you don't have a place to live, 565 00:26:45,004 --> 00:26:46,682 you don't like to work. 566 00:26:46,706 --> 00:26:48,183 I mean, you didn't want to marry morty, 567 00:26:48,207 --> 00:26:49,985 so he doesn't have to pay you alimony. 568 00:26:50,009 --> 00:26:52,187 It just... if you don't go back to this man 569 00:26:52,211 --> 00:26:55,160 who allegedly shoved you once in five years, 570 00:26:55,184 --> 00:26:56,822 what are your options? 571 00:26:56,846 --> 00:27:00,195 I thought I could live with you. 572 00:27:00,219 --> 00:27:01,667 What?! Aah! 573 00:27:01,691 --> 00:27:03,669 Oh! Oh! Oh! Are you all right? 574 00:27:03,693 --> 00:27:05,070 You kicked me! 575 00:27:05,094 --> 00:27:07,673 Oh, I'm so sorry. I was startled. 576 00:27:07,697 --> 00:27:09,104 Here, here, lean your head back. 577 00:27:09,128 --> 00:27:11,877 I'm not saying permanently. Just for a couple of years. 578 00:27:11,901 --> 00:27:13,038 You broke my nose. 579 00:27:13,062 --> 00:27:14,609 No, no, it's just banged a little. 580 00:27:14,633 --> 00:27:15,720 Till I get back on my feet. 581 00:27:15,744 --> 00:27:17,743 Can we talk about this later? 582 00:27:17,767 --> 00:27:18,984 Should we call 911? 583 00:27:19,008 --> 00:27:21,747 No, just a nosebleed. She's fine. 584 00:27:21,771 --> 00:27:23,218 I thought you'd be excited by the idea. 585 00:27:23,242 --> 00:27:24,890 It's not that I'm not excited. 586 00:27:24,914 --> 00:27:27,693 I'm not stupid, Susan. 587 00:27:27,717 --> 00:27:29,677 It's obvious you don't want me here. 588 00:27:30,750 --> 00:27:32,758 No, that's not true! 589 00:27:32,782 --> 00:27:34,259 Mom, don't go. Mom. 590 00:27:34,283 --> 00:27:36,001 Come back. 591 00:27:36,025 --> 00:27:37,332 You know, I need to... 592 00:27:37,356 --> 00:27:39,334 We're good, right? 593 00:27:39,358 --> 00:27:41,236 Just go. Yeah. 594 00:28:29,038 --> 00:28:30,956 Why aren't you dressed yet? 595 00:28:30,980 --> 00:28:34,089 I wanted to wear Andrew's favorite color, 596 00:28:34,113 --> 00:28:37,462 and then I realized that... 597 00:28:37,486 --> 00:28:40,195 I don't know what it is. 598 00:28:40,219 --> 00:28:41,997 Oh, honey, I think the fact 599 00:28:42,021 --> 00:28:43,799 that you decided to come at all 600 00:28:43,823 --> 00:28:45,030 will make him happy. 601 00:28:45,054 --> 00:28:46,772 Yours is blue, 602 00:28:46,796 --> 00:28:49,835 Danielle loves pink, 603 00:28:49,859 --> 00:28:51,476 and I have no idea 604 00:28:51,500 --> 00:28:54,439 what my own son's favorite color is. 605 00:28:54,463 --> 00:28:56,416 I'm telling you, it doesn't matter. 606 00:28:56,440 --> 00:28:58,283 How can you say that it doesn't matter? 607 00:28:58,307 --> 00:28:59,915 Of course it matters. Bree... 608 00:28:59,939 --> 00:29:01,486 That is what makes a good mother... 609 00:29:01,510 --> 00:29:03,749 Someone who knows their child inside and out 610 00:29:03,773 --> 00:29:05,830 so that if they get in trouble, they know what to do. 611 00:29:08,978 --> 00:29:12,018 I don't know him well enough. 612 00:29:16,786 --> 00:29:19,086 You are a good mother. 613 00:29:23,762 --> 00:29:27,772 Brown or green? I just don't know. 614 00:29:31,270 --> 00:29:34,149 I'm going to wait in the car. 615 00:29:34,173 --> 00:29:36,113 Whenever you're ready. 616 00:29:43,452 --> 00:29:45,430 Green. 617 00:29:45,454 --> 00:29:48,294 I'll go with the green. Everybody loves green. 618 00:30:09,979 --> 00:30:12,387 I told you, I'm not signing this. 619 00:30:12,411 --> 00:30:15,020 Oh, I think you are. 620 00:30:15,044 --> 00:30:18,594 Because if you don't, I will divorce you. 621 00:30:20,850 --> 00:30:23,568 Then I'll go to the police. 622 00:30:23,592 --> 00:30:25,971 And tell them what? 623 00:30:25,995 --> 00:30:27,973 There's a secret bank account in the Cayman Islands 624 00:30:27,997 --> 00:30:29,534 that no longer exists? 625 00:30:29,558 --> 00:30:32,207 You moved the money? 626 00:30:32,231 --> 00:30:34,061 Of course I moved the money. 627 00:30:36,005 --> 00:30:38,283 Well, that was risky. 628 00:30:38,307 --> 00:30:41,046 I mean, the feds are watching you right now. 629 00:30:41,070 --> 00:30:42,487 I had to do something. 630 00:30:42,511 --> 00:30:46,381 I couldn't just let you make a fool out of me. 631 00:30:54,353 --> 00:30:55,330 Aah! 632 00:30:55,354 --> 00:30:57,832 Oh, stop, Carlos, stop it! 633 00:30:57,856 --> 00:30:59,334 Put me down! Okay. 634 00:30:59,358 --> 00:31:01,206 Put me down! 635 00:31:01,230 --> 00:31:03,508 Let me go! 636 00:31:03,532 --> 00:31:04,569 Aah! 637 00:31:04,593 --> 00:31:06,571 Stop! You're hurting me! 638 00:31:06,595 --> 00:31:07,895 Carlos! 639 00:31:09,168 --> 00:31:11,968 Sign it. 640 00:31:13,572 --> 00:31:17,052 Sign it! 641 00:31:26,255 --> 00:31:29,895 I know, baby. 642 00:31:29,919 --> 00:31:31,989 It hurts to lose. 643 00:32:06,455 --> 00:32:08,373 Mr. and Mrs. Van De Kamp? 644 00:32:08,397 --> 00:32:11,977 Uh, yes, um, is it our turn? 645 00:32:12,001 --> 00:32:14,039 Well, uh, sort of. Andrew's waiting inside, 646 00:32:14,063 --> 00:32:15,981 but... 647 00:32:16,005 --> 00:32:17,512 What's wrong? 648 00:32:17,536 --> 00:32:20,215 Well, he said he won't go forward with the session 649 00:32:20,239 --> 00:32:21,987 if his mother's involved. 650 00:32:22,011 --> 00:32:24,389 He only wants to talk to his dad. 651 00:32:24,413 --> 00:32:26,952 We drove 200 miles to be here today. 652 00:32:26,976 --> 00:32:28,053 This is unacceptable. 653 00:32:28,077 --> 00:32:30,025 I-I share your frustration. 654 00:32:30,049 --> 00:32:32,297 All right, to hell with him, then. 655 00:32:32,321 --> 00:32:34,199 We're going home. No. 656 00:32:34,223 --> 00:32:36,466 I am not going to let him insult you like this. 657 00:32:36,490 --> 00:32:37,932 He blames me for his being here. 658 00:32:37,956 --> 00:32:40,035 He blames me for everything. 659 00:32:40,059 --> 00:32:43,038 And he's probably right. 660 00:32:43,062 --> 00:32:45,070 Any mistakes made were made by both of us. 661 00:32:45,094 --> 00:32:47,542 One of us should go talk to him, 662 00:32:47,566 --> 00:32:49,114 see how he is. 663 00:32:49,138 --> 00:32:50,138 I'm okay. 664 00:32:51,500 --> 00:32:53,478 Are you sure? 665 00:32:53,502 --> 00:32:55,002 Yeah. Fine. 666 00:32:58,677 --> 00:33:00,607 Right this way. 667 00:33:29,138 --> 00:33:30,615 Mom. Mom! 668 00:33:30,639 --> 00:33:32,017 Yeah, yeah, I'm coming. What is it? 669 00:33:32,041 --> 00:33:34,159 Why aren't you guys brushing your teeth? 670 00:33:35,544 --> 00:33:37,592 Parker, what happened? 671 00:33:37,616 --> 00:33:39,494 Porter pushed me, and it fell in. 672 00:33:39,518 --> 00:33:41,066 He pushed me first. 673 00:33:41,090 --> 00:33:41,997 Can I flush it? 674 00:33:42,021 --> 00:33:43,428 No, no. 675 00:33:43,452 --> 00:33:44,999 I'll fish it out later, all right? 676 00:33:45,023 --> 00:33:46,510 You're off the hook for tonight, 677 00:33:46,534 --> 00:33:49,034 but not you two, so start brushing. 678 00:33:49,058 --> 00:33:52,137 Preston, did you not hear me? 679 00:33:52,161 --> 00:33:54,439 I said start brushing your teeth. 680 00:33:54,463 --> 00:33:56,143 What are you doing? 681 00:33:57,736 --> 00:34:01,286 Don't you dare. 682 00:34:01,310 --> 00:34:02,387 Do it! Do it! Do it! 683 00:34:02,411 --> 00:34:04,149 Preston, don't listen to them. 684 00:34:04,173 --> 00:34:06,456 Back away from the toilet, and no one gets hurt. 685 00:34:06,480 --> 00:34:10,695 Do it! Do it! Do it! I mean it this time. These are not just words. 686 00:34:10,719 --> 00:34:12,527 Do it! Do it! Do it! Do it! 687 00:34:12,551 --> 00:34:15,260 If you do this, so help me... 688 00:34:15,284 --> 00:34:18,471 Mary Alice: Hearing the hollowness of her own voice, 689 00:34:18,495 --> 00:34:22,767 Lynette realized that it was time to get one step ahead. 690 00:34:22,791 --> 00:34:23,808 Ha ha ha. 691 00:34:23,832 --> 00:34:25,140 Do it! Do it! 692 00:34:25,164 --> 00:34:28,078 I will walk you over to Mrs. Van De Kamp's, 693 00:34:28,102 --> 00:34:31,167 and we all know what happens when she gets mad. 694 00:34:33,142 --> 00:34:34,419 Now... 695 00:34:34,443 --> 00:34:38,123 Go brush your teeth, and I want them to sparkle. 696 00:34:38,147 --> 00:34:39,277 Go on. 697 00:34:41,480 --> 00:34:43,628 Sorry you had to bring your kid back. 698 00:34:43,652 --> 00:34:45,260 What happened this time? 699 00:34:45,284 --> 00:34:46,797 Well, couple months back, 700 00:34:46,821 --> 00:34:49,063 I caught Todd going through my purse. 701 00:34:49,087 --> 00:34:51,436 Oh. I hate when they do that. 702 00:34:51,460 --> 00:34:53,538 Was he looking for weed or money? 703 00:34:53,562 --> 00:34:56,141 Oh, who knows at this point? 704 00:34:56,165 --> 00:34:59,104 Anyway, I'd knocked a couple back, 705 00:34:59,128 --> 00:35:00,275 and things got heated. 706 00:35:00,299 --> 00:35:02,177 Pretty soon, we were both screaming 707 00:35:02,201 --> 00:35:04,179 and throwing stuff around the apartment. 708 00:35:04,203 --> 00:35:07,360 Next thing you know, lady upstairs calls the cops on us. 709 00:35:07,384 --> 00:35:09,114 Aw, give me a break. 710 00:35:12,281 --> 00:35:16,261 So now I got some social worker 711 00:35:16,285 --> 00:35:18,863 trying to tell me how to raise my boy. 712 00:35:18,887 --> 00:35:21,396 Kids... boy, if I knew then what I know now, 713 00:35:21,420 --> 00:35:24,098 I would have had that hysterectomy 20 years ago. 714 00:35:24,122 --> 00:35:25,700 Ha ha ha ha. 715 00:35:34,303 --> 00:35:36,341 Uh, Bree... don't get up. 716 00:35:36,365 --> 00:35:38,213 I'll be quick. 717 00:35:38,237 --> 00:35:40,515 Andrew, all any parent can do 718 00:35:40,539 --> 00:35:42,387 is try to provide their child 719 00:35:42,411 --> 00:35:44,419 with the tools to succeed in life... 720 00:35:44,443 --> 00:35:46,120 Education, love, 721 00:35:46,144 --> 00:35:48,423 a good, clean, safe home. 722 00:35:48,447 --> 00:35:49,894 Well, I have given you those things, 723 00:35:49,918 --> 00:35:51,226 and I am through feeling guilty, 724 00:35:51,250 --> 00:35:52,727 so if you want to piss your life away 725 00:35:52,751 --> 00:35:54,699 and blame it on how horrible things are at home, 726 00:35:54,723 --> 00:35:56,640 you go ahead, but I want it stated for the record 727 00:35:56,664 --> 00:35:59,234 that I am a good mother. Do you hear me? 728 00:35:59,258 --> 00:36:01,388 I am a good mother. 729 00:36:04,363 --> 00:36:05,770 Bree... 730 00:36:05,794 --> 00:36:09,214 Andrew just told me he thinks 731 00:36:09,238 --> 00:36:10,568 he might be gay. 732 00:36:12,170 --> 00:36:13,778 What? 733 00:36:13,802 --> 00:36:16,289 That's why he wanted me to come in first. 734 00:36:16,313 --> 00:36:19,445 He thought I could take it better. 735 00:36:25,214 --> 00:36:28,294 Well, he was right. I will be waiting in the car. 736 00:36:37,226 --> 00:36:38,373 Mrs. Solis. 737 00:36:38,397 --> 00:36:40,397 What are you doing here? 738 00:36:44,373 --> 00:36:45,650 Okay. 739 00:36:45,674 --> 00:36:47,852 Are your roommates here? 740 00:36:47,876 --> 00:36:49,654 No. Are you okay? 741 00:36:49,678 --> 00:36:51,256 Yeah. 742 00:36:51,280 --> 00:36:53,758 What's this? 743 00:36:53,782 --> 00:36:55,220 That is, uh... 744 00:36:55,244 --> 00:36:57,392 Carlos just got a little rough. 745 00:36:57,416 --> 00:36:59,346 Made me sign some papers. He hurt you? 746 00:37:03,221 --> 00:37:04,629 John, what are you doing? 747 00:37:04,653 --> 00:37:06,331 I'm going to take care of this. 748 00:37:06,355 --> 00:37:07,472 No, you're not going to do anything. 749 00:37:07,496 --> 00:37:09,234 We're not going to let him get away with this. 750 00:37:09,258 --> 00:37:10,735 Look, you really want to get back at him? 751 00:37:10,759 --> 00:37:11,806 Then kiss me. 752 00:37:11,830 --> 00:37:12,907 How's that going to help? 753 00:37:12,931 --> 00:37:14,909 Because one day, when the time is right, 754 00:37:14,933 --> 00:37:16,381 I'm going to tell him 755 00:37:16,405 --> 00:37:18,783 how he drove me right into your arms, 756 00:37:18,807 --> 00:37:20,437 and that's going to kill him. 757 00:37:25,274 --> 00:37:27,722 And tonight just, whatever you do, 758 00:37:27,746 --> 00:37:29,546 don't call me beautiful. 759 00:37:48,497 --> 00:37:51,316 Oh, morty, look who's here. 760 00:37:51,340 --> 00:37:53,378 Hey, Millie. Hi, morty. 761 00:37:53,402 --> 00:37:56,421 Susie, what... What brings you here? 762 00:37:56,445 --> 00:37:58,405 Mom... I brought her over. 763 00:38:00,409 --> 00:38:02,287 What... what's she doing out there? 764 00:38:02,311 --> 00:38:04,028 She says she won't come in 765 00:38:04,052 --> 00:38:06,339 until you go out and apologize to her. 766 00:38:06,363 --> 00:38:07,932 For... for what? 767 00:38:07,956 --> 00:38:09,464 For shoving her. 768 00:38:09,488 --> 00:38:11,536 Well, I only shoved her 'cause she wouldn't... 769 00:38:11,560 --> 00:38:13,298 She wouldn't stop hitting me. 770 00:38:13,322 --> 00:38:14,539 Why was she hitting you? 771 00:38:14,563 --> 00:38:17,642 I threw a... Threw a book at her. 772 00:38:17,666 --> 00:38:19,904 Morty. It was... it was a paperback. 773 00:38:19,928 --> 00:38:21,906 Well, even so... 774 00:38:21,930 --> 00:38:23,378 At least I missed. 775 00:38:23,402 --> 00:38:25,910 I mean, she... She hit me square in the gut. 776 00:38:25,934 --> 00:38:27,882 You want to see the bruise? 777 00:38:27,906 --> 00:38:29,984 That's okay. That's okay. 778 00:38:30,008 --> 00:38:32,357 It really hurt. 779 00:38:32,381 --> 00:38:34,919 Yeah, I-I understand. 780 00:38:34,943 --> 00:38:37,362 So... 781 00:38:37,386 --> 00:38:38,793 Could you, uh, 782 00:38:38,817 --> 00:38:40,665 just go out and apologize? 783 00:38:40,689 --> 00:38:42,427 No. Why? 784 00:38:42,451 --> 00:38:44,599 Because I don't want her back. 785 00:38:44,623 --> 00:38:46,471 Morty. 786 00:38:46,495 --> 00:38:47,932 Look, I love her, 787 00:38:47,956 --> 00:38:50,835 but the... the pancake shack is just starting to take off, 788 00:38:50,859 --> 00:38:53,438 and we're talking about opening another one. 789 00:38:53,462 --> 00:38:54,979 I mean, that... That's practically a chain. 790 00:38:55,003 --> 00:38:58,012 I-I don't have time for her hysterics. 791 00:38:58,036 --> 00:39:00,645 Yeah, I sympathize, I really do. 792 00:39:00,669 --> 00:39:02,347 But you have to take her back. 793 00:39:02,371 --> 00:39:03,648 Why? 794 00:39:03,672 --> 00:39:06,090 Because she wants to move in with me. 795 00:39:06,114 --> 00:39:07,892 Oh. 796 00:39:07,916 --> 00:39:10,395 Morty, i-I'd like to have a relationship again, 797 00:39:10,419 --> 00:39:12,427 and at my age, with a kid... 798 00:39:12,451 --> 00:39:13,928 I mean, if she moves into my house, 799 00:39:13,952 --> 00:39:15,730 even for a couple of years, I'm doomed. 800 00:39:15,754 --> 00:39:17,562 Wa-wasn't there a plumber? 801 00:39:17,586 --> 00:39:19,564 Your mother said you were in love with a plumber. 802 00:39:19,588 --> 00:39:22,437 I am... I mean, I was. 803 00:39:22,461 --> 00:39:24,469 It didn't work out. 804 00:39:24,493 --> 00:39:26,471 I'm... I'm sorry. 805 00:39:26,495 --> 00:39:28,443 If she moves in, she will burn up all my oxygen, 806 00:39:28,467 --> 00:39:30,074 and I need it. 807 00:39:30,098 --> 00:39:33,378 Please, can't you give her another chance? 808 00:39:33,402 --> 00:39:36,080 You guys are really good together, you know? 809 00:39:36,104 --> 00:39:38,561 When you're... when... When there's no violence. 810 00:39:38,585 --> 00:39:41,856 Well, we... We do have chemistry. 811 00:39:41,880 --> 00:39:43,458 Absolutely. 812 00:39:43,482 --> 00:39:45,830 You know... you know, the sex was like... 813 00:39:45,854 --> 00:39:47,031 Wow. 814 00:39:47,055 --> 00:39:48,933 I mean, there was this one time 815 00:39:48,957 --> 00:39:51,135 we were coming home on the interstate... 816 00:39:51,159 --> 00:39:52,867 You don't have to sell me. Go. 817 00:39:52,891 --> 00:39:54,599 Just go talk to her. 818 00:39:54,623 --> 00:39:57,033 Now. 819 00:39:59,898 --> 00:40:01,568 Okay. 820 00:40:11,440 --> 00:40:13,418 That was a mighty big sigh. 821 00:40:13,442 --> 00:40:15,520 I just keep thinking it's coming, Millie, 822 00:40:15,544 --> 00:40:17,792 and I can't stop it. What's that? 823 00:40:17,816 --> 00:40:20,495 The day my mother will need to move in with me, 824 00:40:20,519 --> 00:40:21,896 and I won't have a choice. 825 00:40:21,920 --> 00:40:23,428 Mm-hmm. I know it's years away. 826 00:40:23,452 --> 00:40:25,730 She's youthful and vibrant, thank god. 827 00:40:28,126 --> 00:40:29,604 But time flies. 828 00:40:29,628 --> 00:40:31,836 One day, she won't be able to take care of herself anymore, 829 00:40:31,860 --> 00:40:33,678 and I'll have to step up. 830 00:40:33,702 --> 00:40:36,180 I suppose that's true. 831 00:40:36,204 --> 00:40:38,151 I think it's nature's little joke 832 00:40:38,175 --> 00:40:42,517 that children ultimately end up parenting their parents. 833 00:40:42,541 --> 00:40:45,620 Well, when that day comes, I'll be ready. 834 00:40:45,644 --> 00:40:47,631 Honey, you better get out there. 835 00:40:47,655 --> 00:40:49,716 Stop it! Aah! 836 00:40:51,720 --> 00:40:54,629 What? Stop! What are you doing?! 837 00:40:54,653 --> 00:40:56,561 What are you doing? 838 00:41:26,484 --> 00:41:27,494 Hey. 839 00:41:30,118 --> 00:41:32,497 Look... 840 00:41:32,521 --> 00:41:34,769 I just wanted to apologize. 841 00:41:34,793 --> 00:41:36,023 Lynette, don't. 842 00:41:37,666 --> 00:41:39,774 The fact that you just crossed that street 843 00:41:39,798 --> 00:41:41,646 means the world to me, 844 00:41:41,670 --> 00:41:44,779 and if anyone here should apologize, it's me. 845 00:41:44,803 --> 00:41:46,913 Thank you. 846 00:41:51,610 --> 00:41:54,919 Looks like Tom's got the mob under control. 847 00:41:54,943 --> 00:41:56,700 You want to have some coffee, 848 00:41:56,724 --> 00:42:00,064 sit around, bitch about our kids? 849 00:42:00,088 --> 00:42:01,495 Ha ha. 850 00:42:01,519 --> 00:42:02,567 I would love to. 851 00:42:02,591 --> 00:42:03,591 Okay. 852 00:42:09,858 --> 00:42:12,136 Mary Alice: Children come into the world 853 00:42:12,160 --> 00:42:14,539 with their own agendas. 854 00:42:14,563 --> 00:42:17,643 Some to brighten our days... 855 00:42:19,537 --> 00:42:24,989 Some to test our Patience... 856 00:42:25,013 --> 00:42:29,723 Some to give us purpose... 857 00:42:34,552 --> 00:42:39,232 Some to take care of us. 858 00:42:41,559 --> 00:42:45,640 Yes, when they come, 859 00:42:45,664 --> 00:42:48,244 children change everything... 860 00:42:56,074 --> 00:42:58,084 Especially when they're not invited.