1
00:01:29,424 --> 00:01:30,550
Hey, sexy.

2
00:01:30,801 --> 00:01:32,135
I love that dress.

3
00:01:32,344 --> 00:01:35,180
Of course you do, Lorenzo.
You made it.

4
00:01:35,514 --> 00:01:37,766
- Hi, sweetie.
- Hey, guys.

5
00:01:39,517 --> 00:01:41,435
- There you are.
- Lena.

6
00:01:41,977 --> 00:01:44,230
- You've done it again.
- Well, it's all for you, Bradlee.

7
00:01:44,438 --> 00:01:45,691
Gotta mingle.

8
00:01:45,941 --> 00:01:47,526
Oh, the girls are by the pool.

9
00:01:47,734 --> 00:01:52,280
Well, well, well, Lena. So where's
this sexy boy toy of yours hiding?

10
00:01:52,447 --> 00:01:54,199
I didn't know you were
a football fan, Patrick.

11
00:01:54,366 --> 00:01:57,911
I've never watched a game. I'm just
a big fan of his old underwear ads.

12
00:01:58,203 --> 00:02:01,789
Well, he's probably just getting out of
the shower. Let me go hurry his ass up.

13
00:02:01,997 --> 00:02:03,124
- Hi.
- Hey, babe.

14
00:02:05,584 --> 00:02:09,338
<i>Start of the fourth quarter, and Owens
will throw. He's got Brown wide open!</i>

15
00:02:09,547 --> 00:02:11,674
You have got to be kidding me.

16
00:02:11,799 --> 00:02:14,719
Honey, just let me finish the game,
I'll take you to the movies.

17
00:02:15,095 --> 00:02:16,722
Take me to the movies?

18
00:02:16,930 --> 00:02:20,141
Hello! There's a huge party
going on downstairs.

19
00:02:20,349 --> 00:02:22,476
Remember the catering trucks
and the valet parkers?

20
00:02:22,643 --> 00:02:24,520
Oh, shit, I forgot.

21
00:02:25,604 --> 00:02:27,481
I'll tell you what
you should forget about.

22
00:02:29,108 --> 00:02:30,109
Football.

23
00:02:30,317 --> 00:02:32,486
Because it's forgotten all about you.

24
00:02:33,404 --> 00:02:36,157
Now, you're going to put this outfit on
that I bought you,

25
00:02:36,323 --> 00:02:39,035
drag your drunken ass downstairs

26
00:02:39,160 --> 00:02:43,163
and mingle with my clients
like a good boy.

27
00:02:43,705 --> 00:02:46,125
Who am I? Elton John?
I ain't wearing that shit.

28
00:02:46,334 --> 00:02:49,420
- Yes, you are.
- I'm not your trained monkey, honey.

29
00:02:49,628 --> 00:02:52,590
No. You're much more
expensive than that.

30
00:02:53,090 --> 00:02:54,342
But I tell you what.

31
00:02:54,550 --> 00:02:57,136
If you're not downstairs
in five minutes,

32
00:02:57,345 --> 00:02:59,263
I'm gonna throw you out of my bed,

33
00:02:59,513 --> 00:03:02,432
out of my house and out of my life.

34
00:03:02,599 --> 00:03:05,310
Then you're gonna have to
pay for your own bananas.

35
00:03:06,186 --> 00:03:09,564
I'm just so mad at you
because you're not wearing my gift.

36
00:03:11,149 --> 00:03:12,359
Gift?

37
00:03:12,901 --> 00:03:13,818
What gift?

38
00:03:14,027 --> 00:03:17,740
It's like a I-love-you gift.
I left it in the closet for you.

39
00:03:18,407 --> 00:03:19,575
Really?

40
00:03:19,867 --> 00:03:21,534
Paul, I'm so excited.

41
00:03:21,743 --> 00:03:23,328
I can't believe you did this.

42
00:03:23,536 --> 00:03:26,206
- Where'd you put it?
- In the back, on the right.

43
00:03:27,290 --> 00:03:28,958
Paul? Paul, what are you doing?

44
00:03:29,084 --> 00:03:31,127
I think we need some
alone time, honey,

45
00:03:31,336 --> 00:03:34,047
so I'm gonna go take a cruise
in your Bentley.

46
00:03:34,255 --> 00:03:37,425
Don't you dare take my car,
you drunken bastard!

47
00:03:37,634 --> 00:03:40,469
- I own you!
- I love you.

48
00:04:01,115 --> 00:04:03,659
Somebody please open
this damn door! Patrick?

49
00:04:03,867 --> 00:04:06,078
- Lena?
- Patrick.

50
00:04:07,037 --> 00:04:08,288
What happened to you?

51
00:04:08,497 --> 00:04:11,291
He locked me in the closet
and left me to die.

52
00:04:11,500 --> 00:04:13,711
Oh, my God, he is deranged!

53
00:04:13,877 --> 00:04:16,131
He thinks he can mess with me.

54
00:04:16,297 --> 00:04:17,257
<i>911.</i>

55
00:04:20,926 --> 00:04:24,680
Oh, man.
Here come the party poopers.

56
00:04:32,896 --> 00:04:36,358
Well, well, well. I'll be damned.
If it isn't Paul Crewe.

57
00:04:36,567 --> 00:04:39,194
So, what did I do wrong?
Was I driving poorly?

58
00:04:39,486 --> 00:04:41,738
Nope. Nope.
This car was reported stolen.

59
00:04:41,904 --> 00:04:45,199
No, no, no.
It's actually my girlfriend's car.

60
00:04:45,867 --> 00:04:46,827
Shit happens.

61
00:04:47,202 --> 00:04:50,164
Shit does happen. I mean,
look what happened to your ears.

62
00:04:52,458 --> 00:04:55,127
I gotta ask you something.
Does he get XM Radio with those?

63
00:04:55,878 --> 00:04:58,422
Actually, they get
a couple of channels.

64
00:05:00,758 --> 00:05:01,883
It's Paul Crewe.

65
00:05:02,050 --> 00:05:03,343
Another question, though.

66
00:05:03,551 --> 00:05:05,386
Santa Claus. What's he like?

67
00:05:06,929 --> 00:05:09,432
Boy, I hate to arrest a public figure
like yourself,

68
00:05:09,599 --> 00:05:11,476
but, hell, I don't think
you got too many

69
00:05:11,642 --> 00:05:13,936
endorsement deals to worry about,
now, do you?

70
00:05:14,145 --> 00:05:16,732
Now, listen here, Mr. Frodo.
Don't get short with me.

71
00:05:19,651 --> 00:05:21,778
That was good. I mean, he's good.

72
00:05:22,862 --> 00:05:25,448
Man. I hope you got a lot of money
for that game you threw,

73
00:05:25,656 --> 00:05:27,825
because that was the most pathetic
thing I ever saw.

74
00:05:28,785 --> 00:05:30,036
Now, step out of the vehicle,
Mr. Crewe.

75
00:05:30,244 --> 00:05:33,831
Don't you think I should pull the car
over more? I could get sideswiped.

76
00:05:33,998 --> 00:05:36,876
You're slurring your words a bit there,
Paul. You been drinking tonight?

77
00:05:37,043 --> 00:05:41,297
Absolutely not. Now, could you do me a
favor? Hold this beer while I back it up.

78
00:05:46,552 --> 00:05:50,598
Hey, you can finish that one.
I got five more. Take care, guys.

79
00:05:52,308 --> 00:05:54,310
We got a 3-94 in progress.

80
00:06:12,369 --> 00:06:14,037
Okay, remain calm.

81
00:06:14,246 --> 00:06:18,167
How you doing? What's up?
What's up? What's up?

82
00:06:21,670 --> 00:06:25,257
<i>What you are watching is live footage
of a vehicle, apparently stolen,</i>

83
00:06:25,424 --> 00:06:26,842
<i>being pursued by police.</i>

84
00:06:27,050 --> 00:06:29,845
<i>We're receiving word now
that the driver of that vehicle</i>

85
00:06:30,053 --> 00:06:32,806
<i>is former Pittsburgh football star
Paul Crewe.</i>

86
00:06:33,015 --> 00:06:34,474
<i>Crewe, you might remember,</i>

87
00:06:34,683 --> 00:06:38,103
<i>was the only man ever to be indicted
on federal racketeering charges</i>

88
00:06:38,311 --> 00:06:40,605
<i>for shaving points
in a professional football game,</i>

89
00:06:40,814 --> 00:06:42,356
<i>although it was never fully proven.</i>

90
00:06:45,109 --> 00:06:46,777
Yeah!

91
00:06:52,326 --> 00:06:54,494
- Hello.
- Do not get one more scratch

92
00:06:54,703 --> 00:06:57,080
on my car, or I will slit your throat.

93
00:06:59,541 --> 00:07:01,209
See, that's our problem, sweetie.

94
00:07:01,418 --> 00:07:03,878
You care about this car
more than you do us.

95
00:07:04,086 --> 00:07:06,714
And how'd you even know
there was a scratch on this baby?

96
00:07:06,839 --> 00:07:10,676
Because I am watching you on TV,
as is the whole country.

97
00:07:10,885 --> 00:07:12,595
Once again,
you are proving to everyone

98
00:07:12,803 --> 00:07:15,181
what a worthless piece of shit
you are.

99
00:07:17,768 --> 00:07:19,353
Well, I hope they like this.

100
00:07:39,413 --> 00:07:40,873
Hey, Lena!

101
00:07:41,040 --> 00:07:44,459
<i>I think we should start
seeing other people!</i>

102
00:07:47,128 --> 00:07:49,048
I think I'm in love.

103
00:07:51,217 --> 00:07:53,928
Good news, boys,
I didn't spill my beer.

104
00:07:54,720 --> 00:07:58,057
<i>Without question, Crewe's five-year
federal probation for point-shaving</i>

105
00:07:58,265 --> 00:08:00,142
<i>has been severely violated tonight.</i>

106
00:08:00,351 --> 00:08:03,603
<i>The future of this once-great football
star looks very dark indeed.</i>

107
00:08:25,625 --> 00:08:28,920
Long way from the big city,
huh, superstar?

108
00:08:31,214 --> 00:08:33,675
Staying with the times
around here, huh?

109
00:08:39,222 --> 00:08:41,433
Ain't she beautiful?

110
00:08:59,075 --> 00:09:00,869
Home sweet home, boy.

111
00:09:01,036 --> 00:09:02,287
Get on your feet.

112
00:09:06,248 --> 00:09:08,250
You're one lucky son of a bitch,
Crewe.

113
00:09:08,500 --> 00:09:10,419
- Is that right?
- That's right.

114
00:09:10,627 --> 00:09:12,796
See, the warden loves his football.

115
00:09:13,005 --> 00:09:15,966
Fact, he was on the winning side
of your little thing.

116
00:09:16,175 --> 00:09:19,012
- Well, tell him congratulations.
- But I wasn't.

117
00:09:21,556 --> 00:09:22,807
Welcome to Allenville.

118
00:09:23,223 --> 00:09:25,851
Thank you, sergeant.
I'll take it from here.

119
00:09:28,729 --> 00:09:31,023
- Afternoon, inmate Crewe.
- Yeah.

120
00:09:31,231 --> 00:09:33,192
Come on. Warden wants to see you.

121
00:09:33,776 --> 00:09:34,777
Let's do it.

122
00:09:35,194 --> 00:09:36,195
Move it.

123
00:09:58,592 --> 00:10:00,344
I used to play
a little college ball myself.

124
00:10:00,552 --> 00:10:02,429
Down at the University of Miami.

125
00:10:02,596 --> 00:10:04,931
I bet a lot of your old teammates
are locked up in here.

126
00:10:05,139 --> 00:10:08,393
No inmates from my playing days.
Couple of guards, though.

127
00:10:08,601 --> 00:10:11,270
See, we got us a fine
prison-guard league down here.

128
00:10:12,438 --> 00:10:15,066
It's like a company softball team.

129
00:10:15,817 --> 00:10:17,360
Now, the warden...

130
00:10:18,529 --> 00:10:20,239
...he's gonna ask you to help out.

131
00:10:20,447 --> 00:10:21,991
Okay. With what?

132
00:10:28,162 --> 00:10:29,664
That wasn't nice.

133
00:10:32,291 --> 00:10:34,210
When the warden asks you,

134
00:10:34,419 --> 00:10:35,628
what are you gonna say?

135
00:10:36,713 --> 00:10:38,297
Yes?

136
00:10:46,638 --> 00:10:49,350
You're gonna tell him "no. "
You got it?

137
00:10:49,684 --> 00:10:51,144
You're gonna tell the warden

138
00:10:51,310 --> 00:10:54,522
that you want nothing to do
with his football fantasies.

139
00:10:55,481 --> 00:10:57,400
Not in my back yard.

140
00:10:58,776 --> 00:11:02,613
Because the warden
don't run this prison. I do.

141
00:11:02,822 --> 00:11:03,905
You understand?

142
00:11:04,323 --> 00:11:05,741
Not entirely.

143
00:11:09,870 --> 00:11:13,999
Okay. I feel you, dog. I feel you.

144
00:11:16,126 --> 00:11:18,670
Paul "Wrecking" Crewe.

145
00:11:18,879 --> 00:11:20,757
I don't get to say this
to my new guests very often,

146
00:11:20,965 --> 00:11:23,343
but it's an honor to have you
here at this institution.

147
00:11:23,551 --> 00:11:25,719
It's an honor to be
locked up here, sir.

148
00:11:27,262 --> 00:11:29,514
Oh, well, this is Errol Dandridge.

149
00:11:31,058 --> 00:11:33,185
Colonel Sanders
been eating his own chicken.

150
00:11:34,102 --> 00:11:35,896
He's my political adviser.

151
00:11:36,104 --> 00:11:38,857
See, I've been approached
by several very influential people

152
00:11:39,066 --> 00:11:42,194
wondering if I'd be interested
in standing for governor.

153
00:11:42,402 --> 00:11:46,781
They see the way I run this prison,
think maybe I should run this state.

154
00:11:47,114 --> 00:11:49,493
Only with less sodomy, right?

155
00:11:54,539 --> 00:11:56,124
Hopefully none.

156
00:11:56,875 --> 00:11:57,793
Sorry.

157
00:11:59,795 --> 00:12:03,256
Now, there are two things we take very
seriously here in the state of Texas.

158
00:12:03,674 --> 00:12:06,425
Prison and football.

159
00:12:06,634 --> 00:12:08,469
We play a little of the latter here.

160
00:12:08,594 --> 00:12:12,765
The warden is too modest to admit
that his team is rather good.

161
00:12:13,099 --> 00:12:14,475
But not good enough.

162
00:12:15,184 --> 00:12:17,937
Five years since
our last championship.

163
00:12:18,354 --> 00:12:19,606
Five years.

164
00:12:19,815 --> 00:12:22,734
Now, I've worked real hard,
pulled strings,

165
00:12:22,943 --> 00:12:25,194
called in quite a few favors
to get you here, Paul.

166
00:12:26,487 --> 00:12:28,155
Now, why would you go and do that?

167
00:12:28,364 --> 00:12:31,701
Because I am convinced that
you can get us back on track.

168
00:12:34,120 --> 00:12:38,124
I haven't played football in I don't
know how long. I don't really want to.

169
00:12:38,332 --> 00:12:41,585
You wouldn't be playing, Paul.
Just consulting.

170
00:12:41,752 --> 00:12:44,255
Anyone who was once the MVP
of the National Football League

171
00:12:44,463 --> 00:12:46,923
must have a great deal
of expertise to offer.

172
00:12:47,424 --> 00:12:50,720
Captain, what would you say
to Mr. Crewe looking in,

173
00:12:50,928 --> 00:12:53,305
giving us the benefit
of his experience?

174
00:12:53,472 --> 00:12:57,560
I think that's a real good idea, warden.
We can use all the help we can get.

175
00:12:58,352 --> 00:13:00,479
Well, then, it's all settled.

176
00:13:00,980 --> 00:13:02,023
What you say, Paul?

177
00:13:02,982 --> 00:13:06,109
I appreciate the offer,
but I'm gonna have to pass.

178
00:13:10,363 --> 00:13:12,782
Now, I can assure you

179
00:13:12,949 --> 00:13:16,870
that your time here will be a whole
lot easier if you just participate.

180
00:13:18,788 --> 00:13:22,293
I just wanna do my time
and go home. Nothing else.

181
00:13:25,587 --> 00:13:27,797
If you'll excuse us, Mr. Crewe.

182
00:13:28,298 --> 00:13:30,342
Captain Knauer, you can stay.

183
00:13:34,596 --> 00:13:35,972
Sit down!

184
00:13:38,475 --> 00:13:42,270
I used to love
your underwear commercials.

185
00:13:43,188 --> 00:13:44,439
Thank you very much.

186
00:13:44,647 --> 00:13:48,692
My ex-husband wore the
same brand of tighty whities.

187
00:13:50,027 --> 00:13:53,657
He didn't fill them out
quite as well as you, though.

188
00:13:54,157 --> 00:13:57,494
Special effects. Hollywood.
Not all me.

189
00:13:57,702 --> 00:14:00,705
Oh, I doubt that very seriously.

190
00:14:00,872 --> 00:14:03,708
Well, then get him enthusiastic,
damn it!

191
00:14:04,501 --> 00:14:05,709
Come on, get up.

192
00:14:05,918 --> 00:14:07,878
How'd it go in there?
We all set now?

193
00:14:08,087 --> 00:14:09,880
Oh, yeah, we're real tight.

194
00:14:22,102 --> 00:14:25,105
Only the finest for you, superstar.

195
00:14:29,817 --> 00:14:31,235
I was just playing.

196
00:14:37,032 --> 00:14:38,325
I ain't gonna forget you, Crewe.

197
00:14:38,534 --> 00:14:40,536
Hey, yo, you owe me money
on that game, punk!

198
00:14:40,744 --> 00:14:42,329
Better watch yourself, Mr. Football!

199
00:14:42,538 --> 00:14:43,664
Bitch!

200
00:14:50,003 --> 00:14:51,880
Yeah, you better run, woman.

201
00:14:54,800 --> 00:14:56,135
Yo, football.

202
00:14:56,885 --> 00:14:58,178
Take a seat.

203
00:14:58,721 --> 00:15:00,139
Thanks.

204
00:15:00,347 --> 00:15:03,058
You know, I have never seen
one inmate just walk in here

205
00:15:03,267 --> 00:15:06,185
and be unanimously hated
by the entire population.

206
00:15:06,394 --> 00:15:08,646
- I ain't never seen it.
- How'd I get so lucky?

207
00:15:08,855 --> 00:15:10,648
You could have robbed banks,
sold crack,

208
00:15:10,857 --> 00:15:13,234
stole your grandmama's pension,
and nobody would have cared.

209
00:15:13,443 --> 00:15:16,821
But shaving points off a football game?
Man, that's just un-American.

210
00:15:16,988 --> 00:15:19,115
- You play football?
- Me? No.

211
00:15:19,324 --> 00:15:22,202
I suck so bad, they used to pick me
after the white kids.

212
00:15:22,411 --> 00:15:25,997
Used to be mad too. It's like, "I can't
believe I picked a nigga that can't play. "

213
00:15:26,205 --> 00:15:29,042
- Caretaker.
- Paul Crewe.

214
00:15:29,250 --> 00:15:31,627
Whatever your pleasure,
I can facilitate.

215
00:15:31,794 --> 00:15:34,797
You need weed, you need meth...
Hey, you need Prozac, I'm your man.

216
00:15:35,048 --> 00:15:37,175
I know how you white boys
always deal with that depression.

217
00:15:37,383 --> 00:15:39,510
I mean, me personally, I don't
understand what you white boys

218
00:15:39,719 --> 00:15:41,679
all depressed about.
Hey, you're white. Smile.

219
00:15:42,722 --> 00:15:45,974
And for a small fee,
I can even get you McDonald's.

220
00:15:46,183 --> 00:15:47,726
- Really?
- Yeah, that's right. Mickey D's.

221
00:15:47,934 --> 00:15:49,561
My man Cheeseburger Eddy
got the hookup.

222
00:15:49,770 --> 00:15:50,729
Cheeseburger Eddy?

223
00:15:50,896 --> 00:15:52,649
That's right.
We can get our McFlurry on.

224
00:15:52,857 --> 00:15:54,484
Enjoy it, fat man.

225
00:15:54,692 --> 00:15:56,736
What about the love
of a beautiful woman?

226
00:15:56,944 --> 00:15:59,280
Well, you're gonna have
to lower your standards

227
00:15:59,489 --> 00:16:01,407
on the beautiful part
and on the woman part.

228
00:16:01,574 --> 00:16:03,368
Hey.

229
00:16:03,785 --> 00:16:05,495
Let's just stick
with the cheeseburgers.

230
00:16:05,703 --> 00:16:08,747
Oh, they ugly now, but in eight months,
he gonna look like Beyoncé.

231
00:16:08,955 --> 00:16:09,873
No, thanks.

232
00:16:10,040 --> 00:16:11,917
Now, here's the most important part.

233
00:16:12,125 --> 00:16:14,378
You can't let these guys scare you.
You can't let them punk you.

234
00:16:14,544 --> 00:16:17,214
Because if you do that, you gonna
end up being somebody's bitch.

235
00:16:17,631 --> 00:16:20,092
Don't want that.
Thanks for the advice.

236
00:16:26,182 --> 00:16:28,225
Hey. Let me take that tray
out for you.

237
00:16:28,767 --> 00:16:29,976
I ain't done eating yet.

238
00:16:30,185 --> 00:16:31,895
Oh, you're not?
I'll give it back to you, then.

239
00:16:32,980 --> 00:16:34,481
You're dead!

240
00:16:43,740 --> 00:16:44,866
Hornet's Nest!

241
00:16:57,087 --> 00:16:58,296
Everybody stay down.

242
00:16:58,505 --> 00:16:59,798
Stay quiet!

243
00:17:04,302 --> 00:17:05,929
Come on, Crewe, get up.

244
00:17:06,430 --> 00:17:07,805
Get up, superstar.

245
00:17:08,806 --> 00:17:09,724
Yes, sir.

246
00:17:09,932 --> 00:17:12,935
You think you can do anything
you want around here, don't you?

247
00:17:13,144 --> 00:17:15,604
Well, you are no different
than any other piece of shit

248
00:17:15,813 --> 00:17:17,440
that calls this place home.

249
00:17:17,982 --> 00:17:21,402
Really? These guys think
you're a dumb redneck too?

250
00:17:22,738 --> 00:17:24,489
Girl, that's your new boo.

251
00:17:31,370 --> 00:17:33,414
You better cut that shit out.
It's getting old.

252
00:17:34,373 --> 00:17:35,833
That's gonna cost you.

253
00:17:36,167 --> 00:17:37,460
Looking forward to it.

254
00:18:29,135 --> 00:18:31,179
Wake up, Sleeping Beauty.

255
00:18:33,682 --> 00:18:34,849
Hey, superdick.

256
00:18:36,768 --> 00:18:39,771
Warden's wondering if your stay
in the hotbox has changed your mind.

257
00:18:40,647 --> 00:18:41,856
How long have I been in here?

258
00:18:42,023 --> 00:18:44,401
One week. Wanna go for two?

259
00:18:52,199 --> 00:18:53,743
How'd you find these guys anyways?

260
00:18:53,952 --> 00:18:55,036
Recruitment, boy.

261
00:18:55,245 --> 00:18:58,456
When college stars don't get drafted,
they need a place to go.

262
00:18:58,623 --> 00:19:01,543
A job, money, security.

263
00:19:01,751 --> 00:19:04,379
Who drank all the damn Gatorade?!

264
00:19:05,171 --> 00:19:06,256
Damn it!

265
00:19:06,423 --> 00:19:07,965
And apparently steroids.

266
00:19:08,590 --> 00:19:11,760
Look, seems like you got all the talent
you'd want. So why do you need me?

267
00:19:11,969 --> 00:19:13,721
Well, now, you might
find this hard to believe,

268
00:19:13,929 --> 00:19:16,640
but there's folks here in the prison
league don't care for me very much.

269
00:19:16,849 --> 00:19:19,810
- You, warden?
- They thought it might be amusing

270
00:19:20,019 --> 00:19:22,521
to schedule the defending
league champs as our first game.

271
00:19:22,731 --> 00:19:25,275
And me? Well, I thought
an old pro like yourself

272
00:19:25,483 --> 00:19:29,194
might have some training-camp tricks,
drills, insights to offer up.

273
00:19:29,403 --> 00:19:30,988
Give us the competitive edge.

274
00:19:31,655 --> 00:19:35,117
All right. Relatively simple.
You need a tune-up game.

275
00:19:35,326 --> 00:19:36,243
A tune-up game?

276
00:19:36,452 --> 00:19:38,954
Yeah. In college, we'd start every
season against Appalachian State

277
00:19:39,163 --> 00:19:40,664
or some slack Division II team.

278
00:19:40,873 --> 00:19:43,959
Kick the living shit out of them.
Get their confidence up.

279
00:19:45,461 --> 00:19:46,962
You know something, Paul?

280
00:19:47,212 --> 00:19:49,380
- You've just given me an inspiration.
- That's great. What?

281
00:19:49,589 --> 00:19:52,425
You're gonna assemble a team
to play the first game against us.

282
00:19:52,633 --> 00:19:55,846
And you, Mr. Crewe,
are gonna be the quarterback.

283
00:19:56,305 --> 00:19:57,264
I don't think so.

284
00:19:57,473 --> 00:19:58,766
Let me tell you something.

285
00:19:58,974 --> 00:20:01,852
In my prison, to get along,
you gotta go along.

286
00:20:02,061 --> 00:20:04,063
I just wanna do my three years
and be done.

287
00:20:04,313 --> 00:20:06,982
Three years is before
you assaulted Captain Knauer.

288
00:20:07,733 --> 00:20:11,194
Now, you could be with us
for a very long time, Mr. Crewe.

289
00:20:13,237 --> 00:20:14,697
Fine, I'll do it.

290
00:20:15,740 --> 00:20:16,741
Good choice.

291
00:20:18,076 --> 00:20:20,078
But one condition, though.

292
00:20:20,286 --> 00:20:22,872
Gotta promise me to keep
Captain Knauer off my back.

293
00:20:23,082 --> 00:20:23,999
It's a deal.

294
00:20:24,208 --> 00:20:26,669
Now, you got four weeks
to assemble a team and train them.

295
00:20:26,877 --> 00:20:29,962
What, are we gonna have a half-hour
a day to practice with a Nerf ball?

296
00:20:30,171 --> 00:20:33,591
Oh, I'll make sure my boys allow you
sufficient freedom, within these walls,

297
00:20:33,800 --> 00:20:35,510
to get your team in shape.

298
00:20:39,555 --> 00:20:42,684
What's this? "Football 'tree-outs. "'

299
00:20:42,892 --> 00:20:44,143
What the hell is a "tree-out"?

300
00:20:44,352 --> 00:20:46,104
"Tryout," you half a meatball.

301
00:20:46,312 --> 00:20:49,189
- What's this football thing about, man?
- Crewe's getting a team together.

302
00:20:49,398 --> 00:20:51,817
- To play against who?
- The guards.

303
00:20:51,984 --> 00:20:55,530
Now, I don't know about y'all,
but I occasionally have the impulse

304
00:20:55,738 --> 00:20:58,408
to physically assault one of our
finer correctional officers.

305
00:20:58,616 --> 00:21:00,702
Yeah? Well, how the hell
we gonna get to do that?

306
00:21:00,910 --> 00:21:03,663
Just show up at the "tree-outs,"
you big, dumb bitch.

307
00:21:05,081 --> 00:21:06,416
Do the girls get to play?

308
00:21:06,582 --> 00:21:09,334
We're playing footballs,
not balls-balls.

309
00:21:09,501 --> 00:21:12,671
This is bullshit. Just another chance
for the guards to beat on us.

310
00:21:12,879 --> 00:21:15,757
Don't you idiots get it? We could get
a free shot at the guards.

311
00:21:15,966 --> 00:21:18,301
This is our turn.
We could beat up on them.

312
00:21:18,510 --> 00:21:20,012
We could kill them.

313
00:21:20,929 --> 00:21:22,306
Kill them.

314
00:21:27,854 --> 00:21:30,856
You know MVP
sold his own teammates out.

315
00:21:31,481 --> 00:21:34,026
What do you think
he's gonna do to you fools?

316
00:21:35,402 --> 00:21:38,697
And that's the truth.
With some cheese on it.

317
00:21:39,406 --> 00:21:41,283
There ain't no meat loaf
between these buns.

318
00:21:41,491 --> 00:21:43,702
Yo, man, that's my flier, man!
I worked hard on it!

319
00:21:43,910 --> 00:21:46,913
You see? He ran like a little bitch,
right? You saw that, right?

320
00:21:47,664 --> 00:21:49,623
Yo, team needs you.
Team needs you.

321
00:21:49,832 --> 00:21:52,585
You sh... You come to the tr...
Come to the tree-outs.

322
00:21:57,841 --> 00:22:00,218
Crappy field, shit-ass equipment...

323
00:22:00,385 --> 00:22:03,263
Hey, man, at least we got some
world-class players over there.

324
00:22:05,599 --> 00:22:07,267
Forty-five.

325
00:22:08,018 --> 00:22:10,019
Forty-six.

326
00:22:10,895 --> 00:22:12,521
Forty-seven.

327
00:22:12,730 --> 00:22:13,856
He might make the team.

328
00:22:14,023 --> 00:22:16,317
Well, if we gotta cut him,
you're doing it.

329
00:22:16,525 --> 00:22:18,152
Forty-nine.

330
00:22:19,028 --> 00:22:20,529
Fifty.

331
00:22:20,738 --> 00:22:21,864
- All right, man.
- Good job, man.

332
00:22:22,073 --> 00:22:24,451
Well, well, well.
You a football player?

333
00:22:24,660 --> 00:22:27,537
Oh, no. I never played
no football, mister.

334
00:22:27,704 --> 00:22:30,748
So, what happened? You read the flier,
thought it looked like some fun?

335
00:22:30,956 --> 00:22:32,541
- Oh, I can't read.
- Oh, don't worry.

336
00:22:32,750 --> 00:22:33,918
Reading's for rich people.

337
00:22:35,336 --> 00:22:38,339
So you know, we're putting together
a football team. Love you to join.

338
00:22:38,881 --> 00:22:40,549
Will you teach me to football?

339
00:22:40,758 --> 00:22:42,885
Sure we'll teach you to football.
Won't we, Caretaker?

340
00:22:43,094 --> 00:22:45,179
Hey, I'll teach you anything.
Just don't eat me.

341
00:22:46,389 --> 00:22:48,182
Okay.

342
00:22:49,808 --> 00:22:51,893
Down, Shrek. Down!

343
00:22:52,602 --> 00:22:57,066
Okay, bring it in. Whoever's trying out
for the team, wake up.

344
00:22:57,233 --> 00:22:58,693
Can you give a brother
a little hustle?

345
00:22:59,068 --> 00:23:00,528
Very good.

346
00:23:00,736 --> 00:23:03,197
For those of you who don't know
who I am, I'm Paul Crewe.

347
00:23:03,406 --> 00:23:07,201
I'm gonna be your coach,
your captain, your quarterback.

348
00:23:07,410 --> 00:23:09,328
You haven't played in years.
Why can't I be quarterback?

349
00:23:09,536 --> 00:23:11,454
- You're right. Let's see what you got.
- All right.

350
00:23:11,621 --> 00:23:13,665
- Hit me, I'm open.
- Hike, hike! Hike!

351
00:23:14,040 --> 00:23:15,917
That's why.
Now, sit down and shut up.

352
00:23:16,126 --> 00:23:17,919
It slipped. I just ate popcorn.

353
00:23:18,128 --> 00:23:21,214
Question: Any of you gentlemen
ever play football before?

354
00:23:22,090 --> 00:23:23,925
- You did? Where?
- Kansas State.

355
00:23:24,134 --> 00:23:26,178
Are you shitting me?
For Coach Snyder?

356
00:23:26,679 --> 00:23:27,972
Kansas State Prison.

357
00:23:29,223 --> 00:23:32,100
Now, I hear they have
the softest mattresses out there.

358
00:23:32,309 --> 00:23:33,601
Yeah, they do.

359
00:23:33,810 --> 00:23:35,937
Not as soft as the ones
at West Texas Mental Institution.

360
00:23:36,104 --> 00:23:38,648
- Really?
- Let's finish this conversation later.

361
00:23:38,857 --> 00:23:41,818
For now, I wanna see
what you got out there.

362
00:23:41,985 --> 00:23:44,112
We'll grade them
on a scale of one to ten.

363
00:23:44,279 --> 00:23:46,364
Move it! Hustle, hustle, hustle!

364
00:23:46,573 --> 00:23:49,492
Give these guys sixes.
Give these guys fives.

365
00:23:49,658 --> 00:23:51,994
Good. Good.
Give them threes.

366
00:23:52,202 --> 00:23:53,495
Very nice!

367
00:23:54,706 --> 00:23:57,584
- Aren't we missing somebody?
- Where's the Kansas State guy?

368
00:24:00,211 --> 00:24:03,340
You assholes better not cut me!
I'm still on this team!

369
00:24:04,549 --> 00:24:05,508
Negative two.

370
00:24:05,717 --> 00:24:07,677
All right, go with negative two.

371
00:24:07,886 --> 00:24:10,971
Hey! Somebody bring me
a Diet Coke!

372
00:24:11,138 --> 00:24:13,098
- Let's do this!
- That's it!

373
00:24:13,515 --> 00:24:15,142
Five.

374
00:24:15,726 --> 00:24:17,561
Good. Seven.

375
00:24:18,270 --> 00:24:20,439
Stupid tire! You're a fricking tire!

376
00:24:20,648 --> 00:24:23,776
You think you're better than me?!
I'll kick your ass!

377
00:24:25,111 --> 00:24:26,071
Three.

378
00:24:28,031 --> 00:24:29,032
And a half?

379
00:24:29,616 --> 00:24:31,492
Yeah. That's better.

380
00:24:31,659 --> 00:24:33,077
Okay. Good.

381
00:24:33,744 --> 00:24:36,288
Yeah. Hit that bag, man.
There you go, man.

382
00:24:36,497 --> 00:24:37,414
Four.

383
00:24:39,667 --> 00:24:41,377
- Five. I don't know.
- I go.

384
00:24:41,585 --> 00:24:43,212
Come on, Switowski!

385
00:24:44,755 --> 00:24:47,216
Daddy!

386
00:24:48,467 --> 00:24:49,760
Oh, man!

387
00:24:50,052 --> 00:24:51,886
- Look at that.
- He got it off the hinge.

388
00:24:52,095 --> 00:24:54,555
- I think that's a ten.
- Let's go with a ten.

389
00:24:54,764 --> 00:24:57,977
I'm sorry. I "brokeded" your toy.

390
00:24:58,185 --> 00:25:01,188
No, that's a good thing. You should
have a victory hug with Caretaker.

391
00:25:01,397 --> 00:25:04,024
What? What you
talking about, man? Hey!

392
00:25:06,402 --> 00:25:07,319
Asshole!

393
00:25:09,196 --> 00:25:11,739
Okay, fellas, it's pretty simple.
You do a buttonhook.

394
00:25:11,948 --> 00:25:14,325
The rest of you guys block for me.
I'll take care of the rest.

395
00:25:14,575 --> 00:25:16,536
Okay? On "go. " On "go. "

396
00:25:16,744 --> 00:25:18,579
Ready? Break!

397
00:25:21,541 --> 00:25:22,709
We'll work on that.

398
00:25:23,418 --> 00:25:27,047
Okay, half speed on this one, guys.
Slow and easy.

399
00:25:27,256 --> 00:25:28,173
Ready?!

400
00:25:28,841 --> 00:25:29,883
Go!

401
00:25:36,597 --> 00:25:37,849
Stop it!

402
00:25:43,813 --> 00:25:45,189
Stop the violence!

403
00:25:45,440 --> 00:25:47,775
Can't we all get along?

404
00:25:56,951 --> 00:25:58,786
- Hey, Paul.
- Unger.

405
00:25:58,995 --> 00:26:01,039
- Team's looking great.
- Oh, yeah.

406
00:26:01,247 --> 00:26:02,874
- So are you.
- Yep. Working on it.

407
00:26:03,082 --> 00:26:08,004
The blood of the guards is gonna flow
like the rivers of ancient Babylon.

408
00:26:08,212 --> 00:26:11,506
That's good news.
Unger, you're the man.

409
00:26:12,924 --> 00:26:16,303
Good job today. You're all starting
to look really sharp out there. Yeah.

410
00:26:16,511 --> 00:26:17,763
See you tomorrow.

411
00:26:18,555 --> 00:26:21,224
- We're gonna suck.
- Yeah. No doubt about it.

412
00:26:34,905 --> 00:26:36,782
You look like
you could use a little help.

413
00:26:36,990 --> 00:26:41,119
No offense, my man,
but you're a little seasoned.

414
00:26:41,328 --> 00:26:42,287
Seasoned?

415
00:26:42,496 --> 00:26:45,666
I'm not asking to play. I'll coach.
I'm Nate Scarborough.

416
00:26:46,166 --> 00:26:47,751
Nate Scarborough?

417
00:26:48,919 --> 00:26:50,712
The Heisman Trophy winner
from Oklahoma?

418
00:26:51,796 --> 00:26:54,674
The inmate from cellblock D.

419
00:26:54,882 --> 00:26:58,178
But about a hundred years ago,
when I could run and gun,

420
00:26:58,679 --> 00:27:01,014
yeah, I was a Sooner then.

421
00:27:01,264 --> 00:27:02,808
I heard you were dead.

422
00:27:02,975 --> 00:27:06,937
No, I ain't dead.
I've been right here, rotting.

423
00:27:07,145 --> 00:27:10,691
Waiting for a chance to get back
at those sadistic guards.

424
00:27:10,857 --> 00:27:13,651
Waiting. For this.

425
00:27:13,818 --> 00:27:14,944
Well, coach, as you can see,

426
00:27:15,152 --> 00:27:17,780
we don't exactly have the cream
of the crop to work with here.

427
00:27:17,989 --> 00:27:20,116
Well, what are we gonna do?
How are we gonna find players?

428
00:27:20,324 --> 00:27:22,451
How'd they get you
to go to Florida State?

429
00:27:23,119 --> 00:27:24,120
They recruited me.

430
00:27:25,913 --> 00:27:27,582
I'll get the strippers.

431
00:27:30,419 --> 00:27:33,796
<i>Well, now, Lindsay, this isn't
about credit or congratulations.</i>

432
00:27:34,005 --> 00:27:36,632
This is about giving men
who've made mistakes in their lives

433
00:27:36,841 --> 00:27:39,093
an opportunity
to rise above themselves.

434
00:27:39,260 --> 00:27:41,929
To move beyond
the bars of containment.

435
00:27:42,388 --> 00:27:43,347
Say what?

436
00:27:44,140 --> 00:27:46,309
What I would do to you.

437
00:27:57,862 --> 00:27:59,613
Yeah. Nice boot, skin man.

438
00:27:59,822 --> 00:28:01,991
Hey, why does he get to be
the kicker? I was All-State, man.

439
00:28:02,199 --> 00:28:03,868
Let's see what you got.

440
00:28:04,076 --> 00:28:05,661
That's why, you dumb-ass.

441
00:28:05,870 --> 00:28:07,580
Just go do some laps.

442
00:28:07,997 --> 00:28:09,457
I heard you boys needed to see me.

443
00:28:09,665 --> 00:28:11,334
Yeah. I want you to meet Skitchy.

444
00:28:11,542 --> 00:28:14,044
Hey, dog.
Check that building over there.

445
00:28:14,294 --> 00:28:16,463
They keep all the records
in the basement.

446
00:28:16,671 --> 00:28:18,882
He's been here so long,
he knows where everything is.

447
00:28:19,090 --> 00:28:21,051
That ain't necessarily
a good thing, is it?

448
00:28:21,217 --> 00:28:24,888
I had a parole date in '86.
But I got in a tussle with a guard and...

449
00:28:25,055 --> 00:28:26,389
One punch and it went away.

450
00:28:26,598 --> 00:28:28,100
Twenty extra years for one punch?

451
00:28:28,309 --> 00:28:30,269
Well, unfortunately for him,
the guard he punched

452
00:28:30,478 --> 00:28:32,270
just happens to be the warden now.

453
00:28:32,437 --> 00:28:34,147
Oh, shit. Warden Hazen?

454
00:28:34,356 --> 00:28:35,440
"Oh, shit" is right.

455
00:28:37,567 --> 00:28:39,778
Fight in the yard. Send backup.

456
00:28:40,445 --> 00:28:41,696
Right on time.

457
00:28:41,905 --> 00:28:43,907
- Let's do it.
- Let's do it.

458
00:28:48,453 --> 00:28:50,955
Ain't you guys glad you got
a black man for a friend?

459
00:28:51,164 --> 00:28:52,706
- Hell, yeah.
- Come on.

460
00:28:59,798 --> 00:29:02,175
Hazen has a rating system
for every con.

461
00:29:02,384 --> 00:29:03,635
What's three stars?

462
00:29:03,843 --> 00:29:08,473
The more prone to violence that the
inmate is, the more stars he gets.

463
00:29:08,682 --> 00:29:10,016
Five stars is the max.

464
00:29:10,183 --> 00:29:13,602
I didn't know that. Let's see how many
stars my maniacal ass got.

465
00:29:16,772 --> 00:29:20,401
Half a star? That's gotta be a mistake.
Check it again. Check it again.

466
00:29:20,609 --> 00:29:22,486
You're about as maniacal
as a boxful of kittens.

467
00:29:22,653 --> 00:29:23,737
Come on, that's not funny, man.

468
00:29:23,946 --> 00:29:26,407
I'm gonna have to stab somebody
or something. Get my rep up.

469
00:29:26,573 --> 00:29:29,703
Why don't we have a maniacal pillow
fight tonight. That could get it up some.

470
00:29:30,120 --> 00:29:32,371
Yeah. We can sell it to pay-per-view.

471
00:29:32,538 --> 00:29:35,374
<i>Superstar Versus Half-a-Star.</i>

472
00:29:35,958 --> 00:29:38,919
Why don't you shut up before I slit your
throat and watch the dust come out.

473
00:29:39,128 --> 00:29:40,754
Come on, guys,
we only got a couple minutes.

474
00:29:41,463 --> 00:29:42,381
How about this guy?

475
00:29:42,589 --> 00:29:45,259
Damn, this fool got the chair
three times, ain't died yet.

476
00:29:45,467 --> 00:29:47,219
Well, we may not have
the most talented team,

477
00:29:47,428 --> 00:29:49,763
but we will definitely
have the meanest.

478
00:30:23,546 --> 00:30:26,758
- What's he doing that for?
- Because he's a freak.

479
00:30:27,133 --> 00:30:30,012
Hey, Sasquatch!
Someone's here to see you!

480
00:30:30,220 --> 00:30:32,264
Not too smart on your part.

481
00:30:35,558 --> 00:30:37,185
Hey.

482
00:30:37,977 --> 00:30:39,896
How's the headbanging coming?

483
00:30:42,357 --> 00:30:44,275
You're bleeding. Just so you know.

484
00:30:46,235 --> 00:30:48,988
People have told me that
you and I look a lot alike,

485
00:30:49,197 --> 00:30:51,324
so I wanted to see for myself.

486
00:30:53,408 --> 00:30:54,951
I'm gonna take a piss.

487
00:30:55,786 --> 00:30:58,414
You scared him away, dumbshit.

488
00:31:03,711 --> 00:31:06,714
<i>You're kidding. Five-star Torres
likes The View?</i>

489
00:31:06,923 --> 00:31:08,132
No, just Joy Behar.

490
00:31:08,341 --> 00:31:11,094
<i>The good news is she can
breast-feed standing up. That's it.</i>

491
00:31:13,095 --> 00:31:15,263
Where does she come up
with this shit?

492
00:31:16,723 --> 00:31:19,559
I'm a Star Jones man myself.
I love that big bitch.

493
00:31:20,060 --> 00:31:21,687
<i>That was, like, the furthest thing.</i>

494
00:31:21,853 --> 00:31:23,397
<i>I got married so young, so, I mean,</i>

495
00:31:23,605 --> 00:31:25,732
<i>they weren't pressuring me,
the society was pressuring me...</i>

496
00:31:25,941 --> 00:31:27,401
Mr. Torres.

497
00:31:27,609 --> 00:31:29,988
Us convicts are starting up
a football team.

498
00:31:30,196 --> 00:31:31,489
Not interested.

499
00:31:32,031 --> 00:31:33,240
We're playing the guards.

500
00:31:35,117 --> 00:31:36,368
Walk away.

501
00:31:37,160 --> 00:31:38,495
Good idea.

502
00:31:38,954 --> 00:31:40,330
0 for 2.

503
00:31:40,706 --> 00:31:42,582
<i>You're putting the pressure
on her right now.</i>

504
00:31:42,791 --> 00:31:44,126
Show's over, amigo.

505
00:31:44,626 --> 00:31:47,504
I still got 15 minutes of Joy Behar.

506
00:31:47,713 --> 00:31:52,050
Well, I'm cutting you short.
Back to your cell, asswipe.

507
00:31:52,426 --> 00:31:53,592
Hey, white boy.

508
00:31:56,220 --> 00:31:57,972
Cherryhead gonna play?

509
00:31:58,890 --> 00:32:00,058
Yes, he is.

510
00:32:06,023 --> 00:32:07,649
Crewe, don't forget,
I'm gonna be open.

511
00:32:08,275 --> 00:32:09,568
Green 40! Hut!

512
00:32:15,531 --> 00:32:16,907
Damn!

513
00:32:18,409 --> 00:32:21,078
Brucie. Brucie. You all right?
You breathing?

514
00:32:21,579 --> 00:32:24,415
I got a bird. His name is Ronnie.

515
00:32:24,624 --> 00:32:27,376
Well, tell Ronnie you got
knocked the fuck out.

516
00:32:30,172 --> 00:32:34,300
Wow, no bullshit. Real football?
Against the guards?

517
00:32:34,508 --> 00:32:35,635
Full contact.

518
00:32:35,926 --> 00:32:37,470
Captain Knauer is their quarterback?

519
00:32:38,721 --> 00:32:41,682
- Yep.
- So I get to tackle him?

520
00:32:41,849 --> 00:32:44,560
Yeah. You can either tackle him or hit
him over the head with that hammer.

521
00:32:45,936 --> 00:32:48,356
I wanna hurt him. Not kill him.

522
00:32:48,689 --> 00:32:50,650
Let's get out of here
before that thing bites somebody.

523
00:32:50,858 --> 00:32:53,902
All right. We'll see you
and your pet iguana at practice.

524
00:32:55,320 --> 00:32:56,780
Down, set!

525
00:32:59,867 --> 00:33:01,202
Hut! Hut!

526
00:33:04,914 --> 00:33:05,998
Hey!

527
00:33:07,041 --> 00:33:08,542
- Hit me.
- Get rid of it.

528
00:33:09,502 --> 00:33:10,962
Get rid of it!

529
00:33:12,630 --> 00:33:14,005
He didn't get rid of it.

530
00:33:15,966 --> 00:33:17,217
Sacked your ass.

531
00:33:18,176 --> 00:33:20,553
Somebody's gotta get open, guys.

532
00:33:20,762 --> 00:33:22,138
You got hammered by the hammer.

533
00:33:22,347 --> 00:33:25,225
I think I felt it on my leg.
We gotta get some speed, man.

534
00:33:25,433 --> 00:33:27,268
What'd you expect?
You got no brothers out there.

535
00:33:27,477 --> 00:33:29,146
What are you talking about?
We got Switowski.

536
00:33:30,064 --> 00:33:32,149
Switowski? That's one brother.

537
00:33:32,358 --> 00:33:34,192
That's a lonely nigga.
This ain't hockey.

538
00:33:34,818 --> 00:33:36,820
You want some speed,
you know where to go.

539
00:33:44,953 --> 00:33:47,497
Hey, yo, check out
this fake Slim Shady, man.

540
00:33:48,915 --> 00:33:51,042
I knew you couldn't resist my shit.

541
00:33:51,209 --> 00:33:53,336
I got the shakes
that'll make you quake.

542
00:33:53,545 --> 00:33:56,213
I got the fries that'll cross your eyes.

543
00:33:56,422 --> 00:33:58,299
I got the burgers that'Il...

544
00:34:00,677 --> 00:34:02,012
I just got burgers.

545
00:34:02,178 --> 00:34:03,221
I'm all right. Thank you.

546
00:34:03,638 --> 00:34:07,434
Just wanted to talk to you fellas about
possibly joining the football team.

547
00:34:08,226 --> 00:34:09,686
The only game we'd play with you is

548
00:34:09,853 --> 00:34:14,606
Slap the Point-Shaving White Boy
Till He Cries Like a Baby-Back Bitch.

549
00:34:14,857 --> 00:34:18,736
<i>Baby-back bitch, baby-back bitch
Baby-back bitch</i>

550
00:34:18,944 --> 00:34:21,030
- That's a big-ass robot.
- Yeah.

551
00:34:25,659 --> 00:34:27,620
You gonna help me out here?

552
00:34:29,623 --> 00:34:30,874
Thank you, Half-a-Star.

553
00:34:31,791 --> 00:34:33,668
Just so you know,
we are playing the guards.

554
00:34:33,877 --> 00:34:36,503
That ain't a team.
That's just a bunch of dumb rednecks

555
00:34:36,712 --> 00:34:39,048
giving themselves excuses
to grab each other.

556
00:34:40,132 --> 00:34:42,259
This guy must be
quite the athlete, huh?

557
00:34:42,968 --> 00:34:46,263
You risk bringing your ass in the jungle
because you know I am.

558
00:34:46,472 --> 00:34:49,516
Yeah, so you'd beat me
in a game of one-on-one, right?

559
00:34:49,725 --> 00:34:52,686
- What?
- I think it's time for you to get stepping.

560
00:34:52,853 --> 00:34:54,896
How's this, though? One game.

561
00:34:55,104 --> 00:34:59,108
I beat you, you guys play for the team.
You beat me, I'll leave you alone.

562
00:35:00,110 --> 00:35:02,071
Take that. Take that, Deac.

563
00:35:02,279 --> 00:35:04,323
This fool ain't nothing
but a thing, baby.

564
00:35:05,282 --> 00:35:07,743
- Ball, dog.
- Ball up!

565
00:35:07,951 --> 00:35:09,286
Can Crewe play ball?

566
00:35:09,453 --> 00:35:10,663
He's a natural athlete.

567
00:35:10,871 --> 00:35:13,999
So is Greg Louganis, but I bet you
he'd get his ass whupped out here.

568
00:35:14,500 --> 00:35:16,751
- Game's 11. Call your own fouls.
- Okay.

569
00:35:18,086 --> 00:35:20,171
- Come on, come on.
- Give it to him, Deac!

570
00:35:24,926 --> 00:35:25,969
Did I get you?

571
00:35:26,594 --> 00:35:27,845
No, that was clean.

572
00:35:28,012 --> 00:35:29,889
He'll be all right. Call his mama.

573
00:35:30,099 --> 00:35:32,476
- If I foul you, tell me, dog.
- Okay, baby.

574
00:35:36,354 --> 00:35:37,772
Take this f... Take this foul.

575
00:35:41,234 --> 00:35:43,111
What happened there?
I think it's my ball, right?

576
00:35:43,319 --> 00:35:44,278
All right.

577
00:35:44,445 --> 00:35:46,155
Get up! Get up, Deac!

578
00:35:46,447 --> 00:35:47,407
Come on, Paul!

579
00:35:47,615 --> 00:35:48,700
- Calm down.
- What?

580
00:35:48,908 --> 00:35:51,244
Now, don't stir up
the brothers, now. Come on.

581
00:35:55,747 --> 00:35:57,165
Come on, Deacon!

582
00:36:01,296 --> 00:36:02,463
Did I get you, dog?

583
00:36:02,672 --> 00:36:05,383
Hell, no, baby. That was clean.
Good D.

584
00:36:05,550 --> 00:36:06,884
I thought he didn't wanna get hurt.

585
00:36:07,051 --> 00:36:09,512
It ain't about getting hurt.
It's about pride.

586
00:36:09,721 --> 00:36:11,514
I bet you he's pretty proud right now.

587
00:36:45,547 --> 00:36:47,966
It ain't easy being cheesy!

588
00:36:54,848 --> 00:36:57,016
Did I get you? Did I get you?

589
00:36:57,266 --> 00:36:59,727
- No, I think I'm okay, baby.
- I didn't get you, did I?

590
00:37:06,360 --> 00:37:07,527
That's traveling, bitch.

591
00:37:18,162 --> 00:37:19,538
You keep coming, huh?

592
00:37:21,082 --> 00:37:24,043
Game point, baby.
How you want the game put up?

593
00:37:30,508 --> 00:37:31,510
Foul.

594
00:37:33,303 --> 00:37:35,305
That was a bullshit call!

595
00:37:38,391 --> 00:37:40,226
My court, my ball.

596
00:37:51,237 --> 00:37:53,197
All right, y'all. Let Deac speak!

597
00:37:55,616 --> 00:37:57,284
Nice spanking that ass, dog.

598
00:37:58,910 --> 00:38:01,163
- Now, get stepping.
- Hold up.

599
00:38:04,959 --> 00:38:06,252
Y'all got a running back?

600
00:38:06,836 --> 00:38:08,379
Not any good ones.

601
00:38:08,754 --> 00:38:10,089
No disrespect, Deac...

602
00:38:11,090 --> 00:38:13,676
...but any man that can take
that kind of beating out here,

603
00:38:13,884 --> 00:38:16,386
I can't wait to see what he can do
in a contact sport.

604
00:38:16,594 --> 00:38:17,554
Shit, I'm in.

605
00:38:19,055 --> 00:38:23,310
Man, give me that cheeseburger.
You acting like a real McAsshole.

606
00:38:23,476 --> 00:38:26,771
Cheeseburger, he wants to run
with the white boys, we will let him.

607
00:38:26,980 --> 00:38:28,440
Let's do this.

608
00:38:29,316 --> 00:38:30,233
Earl Megget.

609
00:38:30,442 --> 00:38:34,488
Well, we didn't get the whole chocolate
bar, but we got a Hershey's Kiss.

610
00:38:34,697 --> 00:38:35,740
I'll take it.

611
00:38:38,199 --> 00:38:40,201
Let's get this over with, rookie,
I'm starving.

612
00:38:40,410 --> 00:38:42,996
Fresh meat, boys! Fresh meat!

613
00:38:43,163 --> 00:38:44,706
Down, set!

614
00:38:45,248 --> 00:38:46,791
Battle, you're a psycho!

615
00:38:47,000 --> 00:38:48,918
Tony, you're a fat shit! Hut!

616
00:38:57,259 --> 00:38:58,469
Holy shit!

617
00:39:02,849 --> 00:39:04,517
Get him!

618
00:39:11,941 --> 00:39:14,986
Ran right out of your shoes, huh?
Hey, manager, don't you think

619
00:39:15,195 --> 00:39:17,404
we can get our new star running back
a decent pair of cleats?

620
00:39:17,613 --> 00:39:20,616
Yeah. I think I got a cousin
that drives a truck for Reebok.

621
00:39:20,824 --> 00:39:23,160
It's cool, man.
I never had shoes growing up noway.

622
00:39:23,285 --> 00:39:24,954
- I'll be all right for now.
- Oh, okay.

623
00:39:25,621 --> 00:39:27,539
Get your country ass
back in the huddle.

624
00:39:27,748 --> 00:39:29,249
That boy got some slave feet,
you see that?

625
00:39:31,585 --> 00:39:33,588
Defense! Huddle up over there!

626
00:39:33,797 --> 00:39:35,507
Paul. Paul.

627
00:39:35,715 --> 00:39:37,675
Hey, ladies. How's it hanging?

628
00:39:37,841 --> 00:39:39,802
- Tell him.
- I'm gonna say something to him.

629
00:39:40,010 --> 00:39:42,846
I just wanted to let you know
I am your biggest fan.

630
00:39:43,055 --> 00:39:46,934
And I will be cheering my jailhouse
boobies off for you at game day.

631
00:39:47,142 --> 00:39:48,560
I appreciate that. Thank you.

632
00:39:48,727 --> 00:39:50,145
Paul.

633
00:39:50,896 --> 00:39:52,606
I appreciate you.

634
00:39:53,190 --> 00:39:55,109
Okay, thanks. I'm glad to know that.

635
00:39:56,902 --> 00:39:58,361
Okay, are you done now?

636
00:39:58,486 --> 00:40:01,072
What's wrong with you? Jealous
because I don't cheer for you anymore?

637
00:40:01,281 --> 00:40:03,367
I don't know what
you're talking about, freak show.

638
00:40:03,575 --> 00:40:05,160
Whatever, back freckles.

639
00:40:05,661 --> 00:40:07,913
Oh, yeah, back freckles.
She's making up shit now.

640
00:40:08,122 --> 00:40:09,456
I'm gonna get some water.

641
00:40:11,000 --> 00:40:13,168
That feature interview
worked better than I thought.

642
00:40:13,377 --> 00:40:15,421
I just got off the phone with ESPN2.

643
00:40:15,629 --> 00:40:18,298
They want to televise
the football game.

644
00:40:18,506 --> 00:40:21,801
Guards, cons, Paul Crewe,
it's compelling stuff.

645
00:40:22,051 --> 00:40:24,053
Lots of human interest.

646
00:40:24,262 --> 00:40:25,972
Don't do that in here.

647
00:40:27,140 --> 00:40:28,474
Television.

648
00:40:29,517 --> 00:40:31,602
Dandridge, do you think
that might help my visibility

649
00:40:31,811 --> 00:40:33,772
with the registered voters
of this fine state?

650
00:40:34,148 --> 00:40:35,441
Oh, yes.

651
00:40:51,372 --> 00:40:53,082
The freak is back!

652
00:41:05,720 --> 00:41:07,221
Hey, hey. It's me again.

653
00:41:09,599 --> 00:41:12,435
You know, if I take this half down,
we could play together.

654
00:41:14,562 --> 00:41:16,564
I'm just gonna take this half down.

655
00:41:19,858 --> 00:41:22,361
Don't worry. Don't worry.
I got another ball.

656
00:41:23,528 --> 00:41:24,780
It's okay.

657
00:41:25,364 --> 00:41:26,740
You wanna serve?

658
00:41:28,158 --> 00:41:29,242
I'll serve.

659
00:41:34,958 --> 00:41:37,669
Really good news.
We started a football team.

660
00:41:38,001 --> 00:41:39,461
You like football?

661
00:41:39,628 --> 00:41:41,004
It's kind of like Ping-Pong.

662
00:41:41,213 --> 00:41:44,424
Only the ball's a little bigger
and egg-shaped, like my head.

663
00:41:45,717 --> 00:41:48,428
Just a joke. Stay calm.

664
00:41:48,637 --> 00:41:51,264
Give you a good chance
to throw people on the ground,

665
00:41:51,473 --> 00:41:55,560
hurt them like you used to when you
were a kid, 10 feet 6 inches ago.

666
00:41:57,854 --> 00:41:59,730
We'd be playing the guards.

667
00:42:03,068 --> 00:42:04,945
I think Papajohn's their safety.

668
00:42:22,503 --> 00:42:25,256
Turley, nobody gets to me.
We'll play more Ping-Pong later, okay?

669
00:42:28,759 --> 00:42:30,177
Hut!

670
00:42:34,516 --> 00:42:35,600
Effective.

671
00:42:36,351 --> 00:42:39,729
- All right.
- He brokeded my nose.

672
00:42:42,690 --> 00:42:44,400
I don't wanna play no more.

673
00:42:44,609 --> 00:42:46,777
Hey, hey, hey. Switowski,
what are you talking about?

674
00:42:46,986 --> 00:42:48,529
This is football. Shit happens.

675
00:42:48,738 --> 00:42:51,240
Paul, he brokeded my nose.

676
00:42:51,449 --> 00:42:52,867
Okay. Stop crying.

677
00:42:53,367 --> 00:42:55,911
All right. We can fix this.
Here we go.

678
00:42:57,204 --> 00:42:59,497
Okay. Good, good.

679
00:43:00,248 --> 00:43:01,207
How's it look?

680
00:43:01,416 --> 00:43:04,629
How's it look? It looks... It looks like...
It looks better than before.

681
00:43:05,546 --> 00:43:07,590
- Really?
- Yeah, it's straighter.

682
00:43:07,798 --> 00:43:10,760
More distinguished.
Kind of like a young Michael Jackson.

683
00:43:10,968 --> 00:43:13,095
I love little Michael.

684
00:43:13,304 --> 00:43:14,889
That's great. That's great.

685
00:43:16,182 --> 00:43:17,767
I think he did it on purpose.

686
00:43:17,975 --> 00:43:19,809
No, he didn't.

687
00:43:21,853 --> 00:43:23,396
Okay, maybe he did.

688
00:43:23,563 --> 00:43:26,358
You gotta apologize to him.
Come on, Turley.

689
00:43:27,943 --> 00:43:29,486
Say you're sorry.

690
00:43:31,321 --> 00:43:32,822
Come on. Say it.

691
00:43:36,452 --> 00:43:39,704
He said he's sorry.
I got him to say he's sorry.

692
00:43:39,913 --> 00:43:41,414
Yeah, yeah. We're all impressed.

693
00:43:44,084 --> 00:43:46,336
Looking good, gentlemen.
Way to work hard.

694
00:43:46,503 --> 00:43:48,588
Good practice, Paul!
Me and the girls wanna show you

695
00:43:48,797 --> 00:43:49,965
- what we've been practicing.
- Okay, hit me.

696
00:43:50,006 --> 00:43:51,174
- What we've been practicing.
- Okay, hit me.

697
00:43:51,758 --> 00:43:54,427
Come on, let's go. One, two, three.

698
00:43:54,636 --> 00:43:57,389
Give me a...

699
00:43:57,597 --> 00:44:00,724
<i>D, D, give me a I
I, I, give me a C</i>

700
00:44:00,933 --> 00:44:01,892
<i>C, give me a...</i>

701
00:44:02,101 --> 00:44:05,230
All right, all right! I got it.
Just save it for the game.

702
00:44:05,438 --> 00:44:07,232
Don't act like you ain't
want to see more, Brucie!

703
00:44:07,399 --> 00:44:09,484
- Yeah, you wish, pal.
- No, you wish I'd kiss you again,

704
00:44:09,693 --> 00:44:12,487
because your breath
smell like eight cans of shark shit.

705
00:44:12,696 --> 00:44:14,155
I wouldn't touch her
with a 10-foot pole.

706
00:44:14,322 --> 00:44:15,865
- What's he talking about?
- He's a freak.

707
00:44:28,836 --> 00:44:31,130
Run, Forrest, run!

708
00:44:35,510 --> 00:44:37,887
That's how a white man plays guitar.

709
00:44:41,265 --> 00:44:43,267
Captain, he said he had some info.

710
00:44:43,475 --> 00:44:46,770
You guys have "Halo 2."
I didn't even think that was out yet.

711
00:44:47,438 --> 00:44:49,231
Focus. Turn the music off!

712
00:44:49,356 --> 00:44:51,442
Yeah, captain.
You know them convicts?

713
00:44:51,650 --> 00:44:53,402
They're starting to get
some serious players.

714
00:44:53,611 --> 00:44:56,614
But their biggest threat?
A running back. Megget.

715
00:44:56,822 --> 00:44:59,158
- He's good?
- He's fast.

716
00:44:59,283 --> 00:45:01,534
He's really, really fast.

717
00:45:01,743 --> 00:45:05,623
I mean, he's so fast,
he makes fast people look not fast.

718
00:45:05,831 --> 00:45:07,124
I got it, he's fast.

719
00:45:07,291 --> 00:45:10,044
Now, why don't you show us your speed
and get your pyro ass out of here.

720
00:45:10,878 --> 00:45:13,631
Yes, sir. Here I go. I'm sorry.

721
00:45:25,391 --> 00:45:28,436
Any books
you'd recommend, inmate?

722
00:45:30,188 --> 00:45:31,105
No, sir.

723
00:45:33,232 --> 00:45:34,693
Not much of a reader.

724
00:45:35,069 --> 00:45:39,114
Oh, come on, now, maggot.
I've seen you in here reading before.

725
00:45:39,281 --> 00:45:41,449
You requested this detail.
Isn't that right?

726
00:45:45,036 --> 00:45:48,122
No. It's the quiet time I like, sir.

727
00:45:49,040 --> 00:45:50,291
Maybe you'd like to read this.

728
00:45:52,377 --> 00:45:54,462
What the hell kind of bullshit
book is that?

729
00:45:54,671 --> 00:45:56,839
It's historical. Sir.

730
00:45:57,090 --> 00:45:59,550
Now, why would he want to read
a book about a four-eyed nigger?

731
00:46:04,096 --> 00:46:07,809
Does the N word
offend you, nigger?

732
00:46:08,935 --> 00:46:10,144
No, sir.

733
00:46:17,068 --> 00:46:18,945
Sorry about that.

734
00:46:19,362 --> 00:46:22,030
You mind fetching
these books for me, boy?

735
00:46:24,825 --> 00:46:26,159
No, sir.

736
00:46:26,368 --> 00:46:28,203
Just pick them up.
Put them on the table.

737
00:46:31,707 --> 00:46:32,874
There you go.

738
00:46:38,256 --> 00:46:40,049
You forgot one.

739
00:46:46,638 --> 00:46:48,098
Bet you'd like to hit us, huh?

740
00:46:49,391 --> 00:46:51,393
Hit you, sir? No.

741
00:46:54,271 --> 00:46:55,397
Y'all my friends.

742
00:46:59,985 --> 00:47:01,402
Pick these up.

743
00:47:21,714 --> 00:47:22,757
Go!

744
00:47:23,674 --> 00:47:25,343
Hit me! I'm open! I'm open!

745
00:47:29,680 --> 00:47:31,974
Come on! We got one week
before we play that game.

746
00:47:32,183 --> 00:47:33,517
We can't complete a pass yet.

747
00:47:33,684 --> 00:47:37,022
- Megget can't run the ball every play.
- I know, coach.

748
00:47:37,606 --> 00:47:39,483
What the hell is he smiling at?

749
00:47:54,747 --> 00:47:56,374
This better be on the up and up.

750
00:47:57,458 --> 00:47:58,459
I guarantee it.

751
00:47:58,960 --> 00:48:00,294
Let's do this shit.

752
00:48:00,503 --> 00:48:01,962
There goes the neighborhood.

753
00:48:07,677 --> 00:48:09,387
Now I'll never get to play.

754
00:48:33,952 --> 00:48:37,331
Did you see that? Did you see that?
The Deac is here!

755
00:48:37,540 --> 00:48:38,666
Nice.

756
00:48:39,041 --> 00:48:40,584
Okay, we seal off here, seal off here.

757
00:48:40,793 --> 00:48:42,168
- Cheeseburger.
- Yeah.

758
00:48:42,377 --> 00:48:43,962
You're just gonna chip this guy...

759
00:49:00,979 --> 00:49:01,895
That stings.

760
00:49:02,104 --> 00:49:04,732
It's nothing a Quarter Pounder
can't fix.

761
00:49:07,319 --> 00:49:08,403
With cheese on it?

762
00:49:08,612 --> 00:49:10,113
Hut!

763
00:49:33,719 --> 00:49:35,888
Man, that boy would catch a cold
in the desert. Here you go.

764
00:49:36,096 --> 00:49:38,600
- Everything's looking up.
- Yeah.

765
00:49:38,808 --> 00:49:41,019
Still got one more
pain in the ass to deal with.

766
00:49:50,819 --> 00:49:52,905
All right, what do you say?
How about a little best ball?

767
00:49:53,072 --> 00:49:56,033
No, I hate that bullshit.
Everyone play their own damn ball.

768
00:49:56,241 --> 00:49:57,993
Holy shit, is that Paul Crewe?

769
00:49:58,160 --> 00:50:01,788
How do you like that, boys?
The MVP coming to kiss my ass.

770
00:50:02,538 --> 00:50:04,624
So, what's on your mind, Paul?

771
00:50:04,791 --> 00:50:06,459
Got a problem with inmate Unger.

772
00:50:07,503 --> 00:50:10,464
- Is he on your little squad?
- I believe he's on your little squad.

773
00:50:11,131 --> 00:50:13,801
Mr. Crewe, would you mind
if we had a picture? Please?

774
00:50:14,635 --> 00:50:15,886
That's up to the warden.

775
00:50:16,512 --> 00:50:18,764
- Damn it. All right.
- Rewound it. Did everything.

776
00:50:18,973 --> 00:50:21,308
- The flash is ready.
- You don't need a flash. It's daylight.

777
00:50:21,475 --> 00:50:23,559
Oh, my bad.
I just want a good picture.

778
00:50:24,102 --> 00:50:27,272
You know, I think you had sex
with my wife before I married her.

779
00:50:28,231 --> 00:50:29,899
- Sorry about that.
- Oh, hell, no.

780
00:50:30,108 --> 00:50:33,152
If she's hot enough to have
a one-nighter with a pro football player,

781
00:50:33,361 --> 00:50:35,071
I must be doing all right.

782
00:50:35,613 --> 00:50:37,032
Okay, here we go.

783
00:50:37,700 --> 00:50:39,785
- Sergeant Engleheart?
- Yes, warden.

784
00:50:39,952 --> 00:50:41,745
Would you step out
of the picture, please?

785
00:50:42,328 --> 00:50:43,413
Yes, sir.

786
00:50:45,832 --> 00:50:48,209
- His wife has got the hottest ass.
- Great.

787
00:50:48,418 --> 00:50:49,669
Just cut to the chase, shall we?

788
00:50:50,253 --> 00:50:52,839
You don't actually think you have
a chance of winning, now, do you?

789
00:50:53,047 --> 00:50:54,632
We're gonna get
our asses handed to us.

790
00:50:54,841 --> 00:50:59,095
I know it. You know it.
I just don't want my players to know it.

791
00:50:59,304 --> 00:51:00,680
Your players?

792
00:51:02,347 --> 00:51:04,850
Just when I thought
I had you all figured out.

793
00:51:05,058 --> 00:51:06,935
- What does that mean?
- In the time you've been here,

794
00:51:07,145 --> 00:51:09,188
you haven't made or received
one telephone call.

795
00:51:09,355 --> 00:51:11,733
You haven't opened so much
as a single shred of mail.

796
00:51:11,941 --> 00:51:14,152
What do you give a damn
about those slimeballs?

797
00:51:14,360 --> 00:51:16,362
You never cared about anybody
in your entire life.

798
00:51:16,904 --> 00:51:18,990
Well, maybe I finally found
that sense of family

799
00:51:19,157 --> 00:51:21,492
I been yearning for since I'm a baby.

800
00:51:21,701 --> 00:51:22,743
And gosh almighty,

801
00:51:22,909 --> 00:51:24,536
my new family and I
would sure appreciate it

802
00:51:24,745 --> 00:51:27,039
if you got Unger off the field.
You hear?

803
00:51:28,582 --> 00:51:29,791
Sergeant Engleheart.

804
00:51:30,334 --> 00:51:31,460
Thank you.

805
00:51:32,002 --> 00:51:33,503
Oh, and as for your request...

806
00:51:35,505 --> 00:51:37,842
...you'll have my answer
soon enough.

807
00:51:50,228 --> 00:51:51,939
Did it rain last night?

808
00:51:52,147 --> 00:51:53,315
Not a drop.

809
00:51:58,028 --> 00:51:59,738
Son of a bitch.

810
00:52:00,072 --> 00:52:01,740
All right, boys.

811
00:52:04,867 --> 00:52:07,829
The warden is trying
to break our spirit.

812
00:52:08,580 --> 00:52:10,457
He thinks we're gonna
skip practice today,

813
00:52:10,666 --> 00:52:13,168
wait for the field to dry,
make it up tomorrow.

814
00:52:13,377 --> 00:52:14,544
You know what? Who gives a shit?

815
00:52:14,711 --> 00:52:17,464
Three days till game time.
We can handle it.

816
00:52:17,631 --> 00:52:19,424
But let me say this:

817
00:52:20,300 --> 00:52:23,719
That old man flooding this field
tells me something.

818
00:52:24,804 --> 00:52:27,139
The guy is scared.

819
00:52:27,348 --> 00:52:31,644
Scared of you sick,
degenerate convicts.

820
00:52:31,852 --> 00:52:33,479
And you know what?

821
00:52:34,939 --> 00:52:36,232
He should be.

822
00:52:36,565 --> 00:52:38,443
Because I got news for you guys.

823
00:52:38,819 --> 00:52:39,987
We're gonna win this thing.

824
00:52:41,405 --> 00:52:42,905
Did he say "win"?

825
00:52:43,447 --> 00:52:45,324
What's it gonna be, boys?

826
00:52:46,492 --> 00:52:49,578
Do we go back to our cells,
call it a day?

827
00:52:49,912 --> 00:52:54,625
Or do we get ourselves ready
for the greatest ass-kicking fiesta

828
00:52:54,792 --> 00:52:56,836
in the history of football?

829
00:52:57,670 --> 00:52:59,422
I'll leave it up to you guys.

830
00:53:18,691 --> 00:53:21,861
Hey. You're part
of the goddamn team.

831
00:53:22,069 --> 00:53:24,571
Get your point-shaving ass in there.

832
00:53:25,196 --> 00:53:26,406
You got it.

833
00:54:10,700 --> 00:54:13,662
I guess that asshole Hazen
wants to play dirty.

834
00:54:13,828 --> 00:54:16,706
- We all convicts, right?
- Right.

835
00:54:16,873 --> 00:54:18,750
Maybe it's time
we started acting like it.

836
00:54:20,543 --> 00:54:21,836
Right here. Right here.

837
00:54:23,796 --> 00:54:24,922
Take it, Deac.

838
00:54:25,130 --> 00:54:27,967
Let's see which guards
have some broken bones.

839
00:54:46,610 --> 00:54:47,528
Yeah!

840
00:55:23,897 --> 00:55:25,148
Shoes, nigga!

841
00:55:35,325 --> 00:55:39,371
Check this out. These be brass
knuckles. They damn near old as me.

842
00:55:39,580 --> 00:55:40,998
Hut!

843
00:55:41,206 --> 00:55:44,043
That's perfect, Cheeseburger!
Never been better.

844
00:55:54,427 --> 00:55:55,386
Good ball. Good ball.

845
00:55:59,182 --> 00:56:00,516
Okay.

846
00:56:03,186 --> 00:56:04,978
- Who we gonna crush?
- The guards!

847
00:56:05,145 --> 00:56:06,980
- Who we gonna kill?
- The guards!

848
00:56:07,105 --> 00:56:09,066
- Who we gonna kiss?
- The guards!

849
00:56:09,191 --> 00:56:10,151
Gotcha.

850
00:56:19,869 --> 00:56:21,329
Lights out!

851
00:56:22,914 --> 00:56:24,665
Good night, ladies.

852
00:56:29,670 --> 00:56:32,256
- Yo, Crewe!
- Yes, Mr. Caretaker.

853
00:56:32,464 --> 00:56:35,634
Check your toilet. There should be
a little surprise in there for you.

854
00:56:35,968 --> 00:56:37,636
You took a shit in my toilet?

855
00:56:37,844 --> 00:56:40,348
No, that's the surprise
I left in Brucie's toilet.

856
00:56:40,556 --> 00:56:42,809
- You got something else.
- All right.

857
00:56:43,601 --> 00:56:45,102
Well, would you look at this.

858
00:56:45,269 --> 00:56:49,022
A bottle of Ketel One
and two glasses?

859
00:56:49,147 --> 00:56:50,565
Now, what would I need two for?

860
00:56:50,774 --> 00:56:52,651
Just shut up
and pour me a drink, bitch.

861
00:56:52,901 --> 00:56:57,114
- Man, who taught you to be so cool?
- My mama.

862
00:56:57,572 --> 00:57:01,535
Now, when I get out of here, I don't
want you to get all Hollywood on us.

863
00:57:01,743 --> 00:57:03,036
I want you to meet her.

864
00:57:03,245 --> 00:57:06,205
Here, look at my girl.
She's your biggest fan.

865
00:57:08,124 --> 00:57:09,667
Your mom's beautiful.

866
00:57:10,711 --> 00:57:12,713
And you, you are ugly.

867
00:57:12,921 --> 00:57:14,965
Thank you. Got it.

868
00:57:15,924 --> 00:57:17,718
Here's to...

869
00:57:18,719 --> 00:57:21,471
...the first friend I've had
in I don't know how long.

870
00:57:21,722 --> 00:57:23,724
Hey, I thought
I was your friend, Paul.

871
00:57:23,932 --> 00:57:27,852
You are, Switowski. Just finish your
coloring book and go back to sleep.

872
00:57:28,060 --> 00:57:28,978
Okay.

873
00:57:29,353 --> 00:57:31,897
And here's to having one of these
with you on the outside,

874
00:57:32,064 --> 00:57:34,317
sometime in the next
three to five years.

875
00:57:36,319 --> 00:57:37,945
- Yo, Crewe.
- Yes, sir.

876
00:57:38,154 --> 00:57:40,532
You being a ex-football player
and all,

877
00:57:40,699 --> 00:57:42,659
I'm sure you got a lot
of hot ass on the outside.

878
00:57:42,826 --> 00:57:45,828
Well, let's not forget I wasn't
the most popular guy out there.

879
00:57:46,037 --> 00:57:46,954
Don't give me that shit.

880
00:57:47,163 --> 00:57:49,123
O.J. Chopped his wife's head off
and still got some ass.

881
00:57:50,041 --> 00:57:51,250
Yeah.

882
00:57:51,584 --> 00:57:54,420
My mama taught me not to kiss
and tell. Now, go to sleep.

883
00:57:54,587 --> 00:57:56,505
All right. I got one more question
to ask you.

884
00:57:56,964 --> 00:57:58,674
Okay. What is it?

885
00:58:01,260 --> 00:58:02,845
Why'd you shave those points?

886
00:58:05,639 --> 00:58:08,642
Didn't you read the papers?
I'm innocent.

887
00:58:08,850 --> 00:58:11,020
Yeah. Ain't we all?

888
00:58:13,522 --> 00:58:14,941
Yo, Crewe, what would you say

889
00:58:15,107 --> 00:58:18,110
if I could get you film
from the guards' games last year?

890
00:58:18,319 --> 00:58:20,529
I would say that's incredible,
but how?

891
00:58:21,280 --> 00:58:22,657
Thanks, gentlemen.

892
00:58:22,823 --> 00:58:26,284
The warden will be done with him
in 15 minutes.

893
00:58:27,160 --> 00:58:29,955
- We can handle him.
- Yes, ma'am.

894
00:58:30,163 --> 00:58:31,873
Then you're gonna, ma'am.

895
00:58:36,253 --> 00:58:37,504
Nice job.

896
00:58:40,090 --> 00:58:43,552
I can't tell you how much this means
to me. Thank you, Lynette.

897
00:58:43,761 --> 00:58:46,054
Now Nate can study
all the guards' formations.

898
00:58:46,263 --> 00:58:48,932
Not so fast, sugar bear.

899
00:58:49,140 --> 00:58:51,101
You gotta earn them.

900
00:59:00,652 --> 00:59:02,153
We only got 15 minutes,

901
00:59:02,362 --> 00:59:06,115
but, sunshine, we're gonna
make them all count.

902
00:59:18,503 --> 00:59:20,130
One more, please?

903
00:59:28,387 --> 00:59:29,597
Let's go.

904
00:59:36,895 --> 00:59:38,897
- Quiet down. Guys.
- Let's go.

905
00:59:39,064 --> 00:59:41,818
Before we watch the guards'
game film from last season,

906
00:59:41,943 --> 00:59:46,238
we have a special presentation
from our very own Mr. Paul Crewe.

907
00:59:48,032 --> 00:59:49,742
What are you talking about?

908
00:59:51,076 --> 00:59:52,536
What's going on?

909
00:59:56,582 --> 00:59:58,876
Now I gotta relive this shit?

910
01:00:14,266 --> 01:00:15,935
Yeah!

911
01:00:18,687 --> 01:00:21,649
You can say this,
my man's a team player!

912
01:00:23,400 --> 01:00:27,403
You know what they say. Once
you go gray, there ain't no other way!

913
01:00:27,779 --> 01:00:30,573
Hey, hey, hey. Brucie! Brucie!
I'm glad you think that's funny,

914
01:00:30,782 --> 01:00:32,700
because I got something pretty funny
to show you guys.

915
01:00:32,909 --> 01:00:35,203
Tony, hit it. You're gonna like this.

916
01:00:42,378 --> 01:00:45,673
- What the hell is this?
- What? It's good. It keeps going.

917
01:00:45,881 --> 01:00:47,924
<i>- Hi.
- Here I am.</i>

918
01:00:48,132 --> 01:00:49,759
Turn this shit off. Turn it off.

919
01:00:50,385 --> 01:00:51,636
No!

920
01:00:57,016 --> 01:00:59,352
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Very funny.
Trick photography.

921
01:01:08,527 --> 01:01:09,778
Nothing happened.
Nothing happened.

922
01:01:09,945 --> 01:01:11,738
I was showing a little wrestling move.
That's all.

923
01:01:12,115 --> 01:01:13,491
Knock it off!

924
01:01:13,700 --> 01:01:14,993
Knock it off!

925
01:01:15,535 --> 01:01:17,662
It's time we took a look
at what we came here to see

926
01:01:17,829 --> 01:01:19,706
before the guards come back.

927
01:01:21,082 --> 01:01:24,377
The first film is the guards' offense
against Texas Southern.

928
01:01:24,502 --> 01:01:27,629
Now, as you can see,
they're running a standard wishbone.

929
01:01:34,344 --> 01:01:36,972
So you're telling me that these animals
are watching our game films.

930
01:01:37,180 --> 01:01:38,932
- Is that right?
- Yes, sir, boss.

931
01:01:39,141 --> 01:01:40,517
They got all last season.

932
01:01:41,393 --> 01:01:43,855
Seems to me that we ought to
do something about this.

933
01:01:44,022 --> 01:01:45,648
What do you want me to do?

934
01:01:45,857 --> 01:01:47,899
You're the criminal. Be creative.

935
01:01:48,317 --> 01:01:51,194
But on game day, if I so much as...

936
01:01:53,989 --> 01:01:54,948
What are you doing?

937
01:01:56,575 --> 01:01:59,661
I don't know.
I've had hot flashes all shift,

938
01:01:59,870 --> 01:02:02,080
and now my nipples are killing me.

939
01:02:02,289 --> 01:02:03,832
Why are we talking about
your nipples?

940
01:02:04,291 --> 01:02:06,668
We're not. Just go do
what you're doing there.

941
01:02:06,877 --> 01:02:08,210
Guys.

942
01:02:09,378 --> 01:02:12,257
I want Crewe finished.

943
01:02:12,382 --> 01:02:16,345
Yes, sir. You give me the inspiration,
sir. I got something for him.

944
01:02:17,512 --> 01:02:18,722
Hut!

945
01:02:24,394 --> 01:02:25,812
Everybody!

946
01:02:27,314 --> 01:02:28,522
Huddle up!

947
01:02:32,276 --> 01:02:36,822
Every day we've been taking shit,
for a long time.

948
01:02:37,448 --> 01:02:42,036
Tomorrow, payback.
Now, think about that for a second.

949
01:03:25,204 --> 01:03:27,206
- What time is it?
- Game time!

950
01:03:27,456 --> 01:03:28,999
- What time is it?
- Game time!

951
01:03:29,207 --> 01:03:32,502
- What time is it?
- Game time!

952
01:03:35,672 --> 01:03:39,634
Tomorrow, 12:00, the bus leaves.
Don't be late!

953
01:03:40,719 --> 01:03:42,721
Where the hell is Caretaker?

954
01:03:44,348 --> 01:03:45,516
I don't know.

955
01:04:12,458 --> 01:04:14,920
A gift for you, Mr. Crewe.

956
01:04:16,838 --> 01:04:19,257
How does he listen
to that cracker shit?

957
01:06:41,897 --> 01:06:43,982
<i>We're here deep in the heart
of toothless country,</i>

958
01:06:44,191 --> 01:06:46,694
<i>coming to you from a simple
Texas high school stadium</i>

959
01:06:46,861 --> 01:06:48,988
<i>that's been retrofitted
for the big event.</i>

960
01:06:49,197 --> 01:06:51,490
Now, when my man Travis
tried to drag me out here, I said,

961
01:06:51,657 --> 01:06:53,909
"What are you, brain-dead from
talking to too many Raider fans?

962
01:06:54,117 --> 01:06:55,077
It's not going to work. "

963
01:06:55,285 --> 01:06:58,205
But the fact of the matter is,
this could shape up as an epic day.

964
01:06:58,413 --> 01:07:01,416
<i>Hot-dog vendors, high-powered rifles,
I love the combination.</i>

965
01:07:01,583 --> 01:07:04,002
<i>And apparently so do the fans.</i>

966
01:07:07,422 --> 01:07:08,924
Hey, shitheads! Listen up!

967
01:07:09,132 --> 01:07:10,883
Everybody on their feet
for the warden.

968
01:07:15,097 --> 01:07:17,432
Anthony, wow. You can sit down.

969
01:07:18,433 --> 01:07:19,893
Thank God.

970
01:07:21,603 --> 01:07:24,147
Gentlemen, Texas marshals
have been kind enough

971
01:07:24,398 --> 01:07:27,734
to supply us with a dozen
of their finest sharpshooters.

972
01:07:28,360 --> 01:07:31,529
So for those of you thinking
of mingling with the civilians

973
01:07:31,696 --> 01:07:33,281
or trying to make a break for it,

974
01:07:33,781 --> 01:07:35,157
you will be shot.

975
01:07:36,784 --> 01:07:37,868
In the head.

976
01:07:41,414 --> 01:07:44,458
Now, let's all go out there
and have some fun!

977
01:07:47,296 --> 01:07:50,298
Crewe! I'll see you on the field!

978
01:07:52,717 --> 01:07:54,302
I think he's in love with you.

979
01:07:55,344 --> 01:07:57,263
All right, listen up.

980
01:07:57,471 --> 01:08:01,183
I know it's hard to get psyched for
the game without Caretaker being here.

981
01:08:01,976 --> 01:08:04,478
But somehow that sick,
skinny bastard

982
01:08:04,687 --> 01:08:08,482
found a way to get us all fired up
from beyond the grave.

983
01:08:09,609 --> 01:08:11,943
Caretaker's last gift to us.

984
01:08:12,152 --> 01:08:14,696
Battle, I presume this is yours.

985
01:08:16,449 --> 01:08:18,534
I still don't think that's big enough.

986
01:08:20,578 --> 01:08:23,164
- That's it?
- No, that ain't it.

987
01:08:23,456 --> 01:08:25,833
Caretaker said he'd find us
some gear to wear.

988
01:08:29,921 --> 01:08:32,297
I think he found us a name too.

989
01:08:36,384 --> 01:08:39,554
<i>Mean Machine! Mean Machine!
Mean Machine! Mean Machine!</i>

990
01:08:51,900 --> 01:08:56,154
<i>Good afternoon and welcome to a
very special edition of ESPN football.</i>

991
01:08:56,363 --> 01:08:59,532
<i>As today, the semipro
Allenville Federal Prison guards</i>

992
01:08:59,741 --> 01:09:02,285
<i>will be taking on the very prisoners
they guard.</i>

993
01:09:02,494 --> 01:09:05,789
And with this special game, folks,
comes a special broadcast,

994
01:09:05,997 --> 01:09:09,125
as I'm joined in the booth
by Baby Face Bob.

995
01:09:09,292 --> 01:09:10,960
Say hi to the folks, Bob-O.

996
01:09:12,586 --> 01:09:14,213
Chris, we went to a commercial.

997
01:09:14,421 --> 01:09:17,467
This job, Bob,
it's a lot of give and take.

998
01:09:17,676 --> 01:09:20,345
So when I bring you in,
don't be afraid to talk to the folks.

999
01:09:22,639 --> 01:09:24,516
Unless you don't want to.

1000
01:09:27,769 --> 01:09:29,229
<i>And here come the cons,</i>

1001
01:09:29,437 --> 01:09:33,232
<i>led by former NFL MVP quarterback
Paul Crewe.</i>

1002
01:09:38,279 --> 01:09:40,739
Holy shit. Hey, hey, hey.

1003
01:09:40,948 --> 01:09:42,533
Well, hello. How are you?

1004
01:09:42,700 --> 01:09:44,118
Back away from the girls!

1005
01:09:44,326 --> 01:09:46,371
- Hey, now.
- Call me!

1006
01:09:48,164 --> 01:09:49,874
What the hell
are you dressed up for?

1007
01:09:50,083 --> 01:09:53,460
Hey, I didn't spend 14 years
in the joint just to watch this game.

1008
01:09:53,669 --> 01:09:55,379
<i>And there in the
high-security bleachers</i>

1009
01:09:55,588 --> 01:09:58,841
<i>are the good-behavior cons,
along with their...</i>

1010
01:09:59,049 --> 01:10:00,092
<i>...cheerleaders?</i>

1011
01:10:01,218 --> 01:10:03,178
<i>We're the mean machine
Don't mean to dis you</i>

1012
01:10:03,387 --> 01:10:05,889
<i>We're gonna kick your ass
And then we'll kiss you</i>

1013
01:10:06,265 --> 01:10:08,767
<i>Hey! Ho!
What?</i>

1014
01:10:11,477 --> 01:10:13,646
I didn't do it!

1015
01:10:24,241 --> 01:10:25,284
Come on, Batt!

1016
01:10:40,006 --> 01:10:41,925
- What's that?
- Did you see that?

1017
01:10:45,637 --> 01:10:46,639
Damn it!

1018
01:10:47,932 --> 01:10:51,643
<i>Papajohn's at the 20, the 10.
And he will score.</i>

1019
01:10:55,271 --> 01:10:57,273
Sweet dreams, bitch.

1020
01:10:57,899 --> 01:10:59,484
<i>That's a 90-yard return.</i>

1021
01:10:59,651 --> 01:11:03,238
And I gotta tell you, the cons seem
more interested in hitting the guards

1022
01:11:03,404 --> 01:11:05,073
than tackling the ball carrier.

1023
01:11:05,281 --> 01:11:09,953
Hey, Mom. Hey, Dad.
Thanks for picking me up from school.

1024
01:11:11,079 --> 01:11:13,455
<i>And here comes the big story
of the day.</i>

1025
01:11:13,622 --> 01:11:15,916
<i>Paul Crewe,
serving a three-year sentence,</i>

1026
01:11:16,124 --> 01:11:19,337
<i>hasn't played since he was banned
from the NFL six years ago.</i>

1027
01:11:19,712 --> 01:11:22,548
Center, shift it! Shift it!

1028
01:11:26,135 --> 01:11:27,345
Hey, Sasquatch!

1029
01:11:31,099 --> 01:11:32,140
Twenty, hut!

1030
01:11:32,349 --> 01:11:35,435
<i>Crewe drops back to pass.
Turley's leaving him unprotected.</i>

1031
01:11:36,561 --> 01:11:38,230
Fumble!

1032
01:11:41,066 --> 01:11:42,150
Holy shit!

1033
01:11:44,152 --> 01:11:45,487
Goddamn it.

1034
01:11:45,654 --> 01:11:48,074
<i>That's gonna be a personal foul
on the big guy.</i>

1035
01:11:48,283 --> 01:11:50,952
<i>And this is certainly an inauspicious
start for the cons.</i>

1036
01:11:51,160 --> 01:11:54,329
Come here! All right! You got him.
Now, protect me!

1037
01:11:54,788 --> 01:11:56,957
Let's go! Hold them!

1038
01:11:57,624 --> 01:12:01,837
<i>And here comes Knauer and that
big offensive unit for the guards.</i>

1039
01:12:06,466 --> 01:12:07,551
Eighty-six.

1040
01:12:07,884 --> 01:12:09,303
Back to your cell.

1041
01:12:10,762 --> 01:12:12,013
Hut! Hut!

1042
01:12:16,684 --> 01:12:20,355
<i>Knauer has Potter wide open.
Touchdown, guards.</i>

1043
01:12:21,732 --> 01:12:23,817
<i>- Son of a bitch!
- And in the first 90 seconds,</i>

1044
01:12:24,067 --> 01:12:26,153
<i>the guards are up
by two touchdowns.</i>

1045
01:12:26,361 --> 01:12:29,489
This one looks like
it could be over early.

1046
01:12:29,865 --> 01:12:31,116
Sorry.

1047
01:12:31,325 --> 01:12:34,118
What are we celebrating for?!
It's 14-nothing!

1048
01:12:34,327 --> 01:12:37,580
You guys wanna beat these assholes,
do it on the scoreboard!

1049
01:12:38,289 --> 01:12:41,792
Are you okay? Oh, God,
you're not hurt, are you?

1050
01:12:42,001 --> 01:12:43,628
Jesus, you sound like my mother.

1051
01:12:43,836 --> 01:12:48,216
Listen, if you wanna cry,
you go ahead and cry. I'll cry with you.

1052
01:12:48,425 --> 01:12:51,219
Get off me! Get back out there
and kick some ass!

1053
01:12:51,428 --> 01:12:54,388
Why are you yelling at me?
All I did was care!

1054
01:12:56,015 --> 01:12:59,560
Look! A broken leg will heal.

1055
01:12:59,769 --> 01:13:02,563
A loss to the Mean Machine
lasts forever.

1056
01:13:05,149 --> 01:13:06,067
Sorry, guys.

1057
01:13:06,609 --> 01:13:07,902
Yeah, yeah. Me too.

1058
01:13:09,570 --> 01:13:11,906
All right. Now, let's get started!

1059
01:13:14,199 --> 01:13:16,910
Now, get the hell out there! Let's go!

1060
01:13:29,757 --> 01:13:30,716
Way to go! Way to go!

1061
01:13:30,925 --> 01:13:33,510
<i>There's the first sign of life
from the cons.</i>

1062
01:13:33,718 --> 01:13:37,472
Let's see if Paul "Motley" Crewe
can make something happen.

1063
01:13:37,681 --> 01:13:38,598
Hut!

1064
01:13:38,807 --> 01:13:42,519
<i>On first down, Crewe will throw.
He's got Deacon wide open.</i>

1065
01:13:44,187 --> 01:13:46,398
<i>That's gotta be pass interference.</i>

1066
01:13:46,606 --> 01:13:48,359
<i>But the ref is waving it off.</i>

1067
01:13:48,568 --> 01:13:50,528
- What?!
- Oh, come on!

1068
01:13:50,695 --> 01:13:53,071
Come on, now. I'm in this hellhole
for less than that.

1069
01:13:53,280 --> 01:13:55,865
- Be a man and make a call.
- You're right.

1070
01:13:56,074 --> 01:13:58,493
Unsportsmanlike conduct!
Eighty-eight black!

1071
01:13:58,702 --> 01:13:59,869
What?!

1072
01:14:00,829 --> 01:14:01,913
Come on!

1073
01:14:03,790 --> 01:14:05,333
This is baby-back bullshit!

1074
01:14:05,542 --> 01:14:07,252
- Bullshit, D.
- Calm down. Let it go.

1075
01:14:07,586 --> 01:14:10,380
Let's call that one
a questionable call.

1076
01:14:10,797 --> 01:14:12,215
Blue 42, hut!

1077
01:14:14,008 --> 01:14:17,553
<i>The give is to Megget. He spins
to the outside. Megget has room.</i>

1078
01:14:19,639 --> 01:14:22,058
<i>He's at the 35. The 40.</i>

1079
01:14:22,934 --> 01:14:24,936
<i>He's brought down hard,
by his facemask.</i>

1080
01:14:25,353 --> 01:14:28,356
What? Oh, come on, man!
That was a facemask!

1081
01:14:28,565 --> 01:14:30,567
- You're not gonna call that?
- I saw a clean tackle, sir.

1082
01:14:30,734 --> 01:14:32,611
What you looking at?
Are you serious?

1083
01:14:32,819 --> 01:14:34,904
Tell it to the parole board, criminal.

1084
01:14:35,446 --> 01:14:37,072
I mean, this is absurd.

1085
01:14:37,281 --> 01:14:39,533
We can't win with the refs
on the payroll!

1086
01:14:39,742 --> 01:14:42,661
Listen up. I got an idea
to end all this bullshit.

1087
01:14:42,870 --> 01:14:45,122
Come on, let's all stay up! Come on!

1088
01:14:46,916 --> 01:14:48,251
Down, set!

1089
01:14:48,543 --> 01:14:49,669
Red 58.

1090
01:14:49,878 --> 01:14:51,129
Cover your man!

1091
01:14:51,588 --> 01:14:53,380
Red 58. Hut!

1092
01:15:04,391 --> 01:15:06,769
That one hurt my marble sack.

1093
01:15:09,146 --> 01:15:10,105
All right!

1094
01:15:10,314 --> 01:15:12,024
- You all right?
- Yeah.

1095
01:15:12,191 --> 01:15:13,608
- What down is it?
- Fifth.

1096
01:15:13,816 --> 01:15:15,902
- No, no. It would be fourth down.
- Okay.

1097
01:15:19,823 --> 01:15:22,910
What do you think?
Should I go for the left nut this time?

1098
01:15:23,369 --> 01:15:25,371
Underneath! Let's go!

1099
01:15:25,579 --> 01:15:27,414
Ref, you gotta get in the game!
Right over here!

1100
01:15:27,581 --> 01:15:31,669
<i>Well, I don't quite get this, but on fourth
and 22, the cons are gonna go for it.</i>

1101
01:15:31,877 --> 01:15:33,295
Down, set!

1102
01:15:33,503 --> 01:15:34,921
Red 58.

1103
01:15:35,088 --> 01:15:36,589
Red 58. Hut!

1104
01:15:45,473 --> 01:15:47,892
You gotta always protect
the McNuggets.

1105
01:15:51,272 --> 01:15:53,898
How about from now on, you call
a fair game? How's that sound?

1106
01:15:54,274 --> 01:15:55,191
Sounds good.

1107
01:15:55,441 --> 01:15:57,277
Okay. Wet Willie.

1108
01:15:58,570 --> 01:15:59,904
Yeah, you like that.

1109
01:16:03,950 --> 01:16:05,660
<i>And so the guards will take over</i>

1110
01:16:05,868 --> 01:16:09,205
<i>after one of the strangest
offensive series I've ever seen.</i>

1111
01:16:09,497 --> 01:16:12,458
Okay, boys. We know who doesn't
have any balls out there now.

1112
01:16:12,667 --> 01:16:15,043
Have we got any?
Have we got some balls?

1113
01:16:15,210 --> 01:16:18,630
- Yeah!
- All right! Let's go kick some ass!

1114
01:16:19,048 --> 01:16:21,593
Come on, Swit, stand them up, baby.

1115
01:16:21,801 --> 01:16:25,388
White 50. White 50. Hut, hut, hut!

1116
01:16:25,597 --> 01:16:27,890
<i>Knauer, play action.
Here comes the blitz.</i>

1117
01:16:30,685 --> 01:16:34,271
<i>Switowski is so big, it's like being
tackled by a Coke machine with legs.</i>

1118
01:16:34,771 --> 01:16:36,315
This is fun!

1119
01:16:38,108 --> 01:16:39,693
Nice to see you smiling, Bob.

1120
01:16:40,444 --> 01:16:41,820
Thanks, Chris.

1121
01:16:43,280 --> 01:16:44,656
Green 90! Hut!

1122
01:16:44,990 --> 01:16:47,242
<i>Third and 5,
and the give is to Megget.</i>

1123
01:16:47,409 --> 01:16:49,829
<i>He's to the 40,
where he'll come up short.</i>

1124
01:16:50,079 --> 01:16:52,540
<i>But look at Turley push the pile.</i>

1125
01:16:52,749 --> 01:16:53,999
<i>And now Crewe.</i>

1126
01:16:54,917 --> 01:16:56,543
And that's a first down!

1127
01:16:58,045 --> 01:17:01,173
<i>And look out. Boy, somebody better
take control of this game soon,</i>

1128
01:17:01,381 --> 01:17:03,467
<i>or they're gonna need body bags
on the sidelines.</i>

1129
01:17:03,675 --> 01:17:04,635
Let's go, guys.

1130
01:17:04,843 --> 01:17:05,928
<i>Start of the second quarter.</i>

1131
01:17:06,136 --> 01:17:09,014
<i>Cons still down by two touchdowns,
but they finally have some momentum.</i>

1132
01:17:09,222 --> 01:17:10,557
Hut!

1133
01:17:12,851 --> 01:17:14,977
<i>Crewe with a shovel pass to Megget.</i>

1134
01:17:15,728 --> 01:17:17,897
<i>And Megget scrambles
for a first down.</i>

1135
01:17:18,648 --> 01:17:19,983
Oh, you fooled me.

1136
01:17:20,192 --> 01:17:21,985
- I got you there, didn't I?
- You did.

1137
01:17:22,194 --> 01:17:24,613
You know, Engleheart, you are
the best-looking guy on your team.

1138
01:17:24,821 --> 01:17:29,159
You know, Paul, in the midst of all this,
for you to say something like that is...

1139
01:17:30,035 --> 01:17:31,328
Come on, let's go. Let's go, D.

1140
01:17:31,536 --> 01:17:33,580
<i>First and 10 at the guards' 35.</i>

1141
01:17:33,789 --> 01:17:36,540
<i>Crewe dumps it over the middle
to Deacon Moss.</i>

1142
01:17:36,832 --> 01:17:41,754
<i>And he's hammered at the 17 for a
13-yard pickup, and that's a first down.</i>

1143
01:17:42,296 --> 01:17:43,965
<i>- Hut!
- Crewe, trying to get his team</i>

1144
01:17:44,173 --> 01:17:45,591
<i>on the scoreboard.</i>

1145
01:17:46,259 --> 01:17:47,760
<i>He will throw.</i>

1146
01:17:49,805 --> 01:17:52,599
<i>And it's caught by Deacon Moss
for a touchdown!</i>

1147
01:17:53,850 --> 01:17:54,767
All right!

1148
01:17:54,976 --> 01:17:58,813
<i>And so there'll be no shutout today,
as the cons are on the board.</i>

1149
01:17:59,397 --> 01:18:02,525
Quit booing, people.
Both teams are trying very hard!

1150
01:18:02,900 --> 01:18:06,070
What the hell's wrong with you?
Stop acting like a damn cheerleader!

1151
01:18:06,279 --> 01:18:08,322
- Sportsmanship, try it.
- Shut up.

1152
01:18:11,742 --> 01:18:13,119
Damn.

1153
01:18:13,286 --> 01:18:16,329
<i>2:11 left in the first half.
And Dunham is back in at fullback.</i>

1154
01:18:16,496 --> 01:18:19,249
<i>And he is a load, at 6'2", 260.</i>

1155
01:18:21,627 --> 01:18:23,588
<i>Dunham, breaking tackles.</i>

1156
01:18:23,796 --> 01:18:25,464
<i>He refuses to go down.</i>

1157
01:18:26,090 --> 01:18:29,760
<i>But he finally does
after a 15-yard gain.</i>

1158
01:18:31,220 --> 01:18:33,306
That's how a white man
runs a football.

1159
01:18:33,514 --> 01:18:36,182
If I was on D, I'd crack you square
in that egg-ass head of yours.

1160
01:18:36,349 --> 01:18:39,060
Yeah, but you ain't on D.
Are you, bitch?

1161
01:18:40,520 --> 01:18:42,689
Switowski! Come here.

1162
01:18:43,189 --> 01:18:45,233
Do you know what
he said to me in the library?

1163
01:18:48,820 --> 01:18:51,449
Yes. Him. Out.

1164
01:18:54,785 --> 01:18:57,662
<i>D, D, defense
D, D, defense</i>

1165
01:18:57,829 --> 01:18:59,956
<i>The cons don't seem to have
an answer for Dunham,</i>

1166
01:19:00,123 --> 01:19:03,543
<i>who's averaging close to 12 yards
a carry this half.</i>

1167
01:19:05,128 --> 01:19:06,212
Green 67.

1168
01:19:06,421 --> 01:19:08,173
Green 67. Hut!

1169
01:19:11,927 --> 01:19:15,012
<i>Oh, what a hit on Dunham
by Switowski.</i>

1170
01:19:17,556 --> 01:19:19,808
I think I made him shit himself.

1171
01:19:20,060 --> 01:19:22,062
- Shit!
- I think he just shit himself.

1172
01:19:22,479 --> 01:19:24,522
I think he just shit himself.

1173
01:19:24,731 --> 01:19:28,151
Good Lord.
This guy shit himself bigtime.

1174
01:19:28,360 --> 01:19:31,529
See? I told you
I made him shit himself!

1175
01:19:32,280 --> 01:19:35,033
Yo! I'll make sure I send
them books to the hospital, pimp.

1176
01:19:35,241 --> 01:19:36,784
And some diapers.

1177
01:19:38,369 --> 01:19:40,996
Nineteen seconds.
We got a lot of ground to cover.

1178
01:19:41,163 --> 01:19:43,415
So you bastards remember
that play we practiced in the mud?

1179
01:19:43,624 --> 01:19:46,335
What are you talking about?
That was some schoolyard bullshit.

1180
01:19:46,543 --> 01:19:49,421
Yeah. Let's try some
schoolyard bullshit.

1181
01:19:51,258 --> 01:19:52,592
Come on, D, let's go.

1182
01:19:52,801 --> 01:19:55,552
Down, set! Green 88.

1183
01:19:55,886 --> 01:19:57,137
Green 88. Hut!

1184
01:19:57,346 --> 01:20:01,892
<i>The clock starts to run. Crewe hands
the ball to Megget. It's a reverse.</i>

1185
01:20:02,184 --> 01:20:04,144
<i>Cheeseburger Eddy's got it.</i>

1186
01:20:04,395 --> 01:20:05,980
Go, baby, go!

1187
01:20:06,564 --> 01:20:08,482
<i>He laterals to Deacon.</i>

1188
01:20:09,608 --> 01:20:10,943
Tackle him!

1189
01:20:12,194 --> 01:20:13,320
<i>To Turley.</i>

1190
01:20:13,487 --> 01:20:16,072
<i>The clock is running. To Brucie.</i>

1191
01:20:16,281 --> 01:20:18,241
<i>Shades of Cal-Stanford.</i>

1192
01:20:18,408 --> 01:20:19,867
<i>Back to Crewe.</i>

1193
01:20:20,536 --> 01:20:22,204
<i>He tosses to Megget.</i>

1194
01:20:22,413 --> 01:20:23,372
Tackle him!

1195
01:20:27,084 --> 01:20:29,837
<i>And look at that little Megget run.</i>

1196
01:20:30,004 --> 01:20:31,714
<i>Three seconds left.</i>

1197
01:20:32,881 --> 01:20:33,882
Yeah! Go!

1198
01:20:34,925 --> 01:20:39,888
<i>He could go all the way. Touchdown!</i>

1199
01:20:45,268 --> 01:20:46,352
Did you see that?!

1200
01:20:46,561 --> 01:20:47,854
Do that sound again.

1201
01:20:49,772 --> 01:20:51,025
I like that.

1202
01:20:53,986 --> 01:20:56,154
<i>And so, on a miraculous play,</i>

1203
01:20:56,362 --> 01:21:00,158
<i>the cons end the first half
with the score: 14-all.</i>

1204
01:21:04,996 --> 01:21:06,623
Bring it in.

1205
01:21:07,332 --> 01:21:10,543
Do you have any idea
who's beating you out there?

1206
01:21:10,752 --> 01:21:12,795
This was supposed to be a blowout,

1207
01:21:12,962 --> 01:21:16,298
and they're showing you up
in front of the whole nation.

1208
01:21:17,341 --> 01:21:18,884
The whole nation!

1209
01:21:19,301 --> 01:21:21,429
I like it when he's angry.

1210
01:21:23,598 --> 01:21:26,142
- I told you!
- Way to go, baby, way to go.

1211
01:21:32,273 --> 01:21:35,026
What in the hell do you think
you're doing out there?

1212
01:21:35,235 --> 01:21:36,777
Playing football, sir.

1213
01:21:38,403 --> 01:21:40,155
I didn't say nothing about winning.

1214
01:21:40,489 --> 01:21:42,616
We're not winning. Not yet.

1215
01:21:45,619 --> 01:21:47,996
You got yourself in quite
a predicament, Mr. Crewe.

1216
01:21:48,163 --> 01:21:50,540
- Is that right?
- See, it's just come to my attention

1217
01:21:50,749 --> 01:21:52,710
that inmate Unger
has been taken into custody

1218
01:21:52,919 --> 01:21:54,295
for the murder of Caretaker.

1219
01:21:54,504 --> 01:21:56,797
- Good.
- Oh, yeah, it's good.

1220
01:21:57,214 --> 01:22:00,467
Only thing is, he claims
to have an accomplice.

1221
01:22:00,842 --> 01:22:02,594
Claims you knew all about it.

1222
01:22:02,761 --> 01:22:05,806
Hell, he even says
you sent Caretaker to your cell.

1223
01:22:06,890 --> 01:22:08,100
Bullshit.

1224
01:22:08,308 --> 01:22:11,353
Captain Knauer says
he saw you planning it with Unger.

1225
01:22:12,688 --> 01:22:14,356
There's no way
that could hold up in court.

1226
01:22:14,523 --> 01:22:15,482
Court?

1227
01:22:17,316 --> 01:22:21,446
Hell, boy, in Allenville,
I'm the judge, I'm the jury,

1228
01:22:21,655 --> 01:22:25,659
and in your particular case,
I'm the executioner.

1229
01:22:26,493 --> 01:22:27,494
What do you want?

1230
01:22:28,036 --> 01:22:29,580
I want you to lose.

1231
01:22:29,788 --> 01:22:30,914
I can't do that.

1232
01:22:31,039 --> 01:22:33,959
Of course you can. After all,
you've had plenty of practice.

1233
01:22:34,126 --> 01:22:37,461
But the men. It's more important
to them than it is to you.

1234
01:22:38,629 --> 01:22:40,631
Okay. Suit yourself.

1235
01:22:40,965 --> 01:22:44,260
Spend the next 25 years
of your useless life in prison.

1236
01:22:46,429 --> 01:22:48,055
All right, I'll do it.

1237
01:22:51,894 --> 01:22:55,564
But I don't want my guys hurt.
You get ahead, you coast. We clear?

1238
01:22:55,772 --> 01:22:58,399
Fine. Right after I get
a two-touchdown lead.

1239
01:22:59,859 --> 01:23:02,528
I tell you what bothers me
the most, warden.

1240
01:23:04,614 --> 01:23:07,241
That you're not gonna be
out there on that field with us,

1241
01:23:07,450 --> 01:23:09,201
getting what you got coming to you.

1242
01:23:12,163 --> 01:23:14,916
The only thing coming to me
is victory.

1243
01:23:17,000 --> 01:23:18,376
Mean Machine.

1244
01:23:19,878 --> 01:23:21,087
It's cute.

1245
01:23:24,133 --> 01:23:25,760
- Let's go, boy!
- We can do it, baby!

1246
01:23:25,968 --> 01:23:27,428
Captain.

1247
01:23:28,346 --> 01:23:29,639
May I have a word?

1248
01:23:29,847 --> 01:23:32,266
Don't worry, warden,
we'll take care of business.

1249
01:23:32,475 --> 01:23:33,559
I already have.

1250
01:23:33,935 --> 01:23:36,479
What? We can win this on our own.

1251
01:23:36,687 --> 01:23:40,565
Captain, a man in my position
doesn't leave things to chance.

1252
01:23:41,316 --> 01:23:44,277
Now, after you get a comfortable
three-touchdown lead,

1253
01:23:44,486 --> 01:23:47,239
I want you to inflict as much pain
as humanly possible.

1254
01:23:47,364 --> 01:23:49,491
Do not let up, you hear?

1255
01:23:49,866 --> 01:23:52,662
I want those cons to understand
who owns them.

1256
01:23:53,454 --> 01:23:54,747
Do I make myself clear?

1257
01:23:54,956 --> 01:23:56,165
Oh, yes, sir.

1258
01:23:56,958 --> 01:23:57,874
Good.

1259
01:23:58,750 --> 01:24:02,045
<i>There's the kickoff, and we're
under way in the second half.</i>

1260
01:24:07,592 --> 01:24:10,554
<i>Megget is finally brought down
at the guards' 33,</i>

1261
01:24:10,720 --> 01:24:12,305
<i>where Paul Crewe will take over.</i>

1262
01:24:12,514 --> 01:24:14,224
<i>And what a first half he's had.</i>

1263
01:24:14,432 --> 01:24:15,600
Here we go! Here we go!

1264
01:24:18,644 --> 01:24:19,895
Down, set!

1265
01:24:20,646 --> 01:24:22,691
Y 45. Hut!

1266
01:24:23,567 --> 01:24:25,944
<i>On first and 10, Crewe will pass.</i>

1267
01:24:26,152 --> 01:24:27,737
<i>- He's got Deacon wide open.
- Come on.</i>

1268
01:24:27,946 --> 01:24:29,072
<i>Oh, incomplete.</i>

1269
01:24:29,239 --> 01:24:30,282
It's okay. Get your head up.

1270
01:24:30,865 --> 01:24:31,783
It's all right, man.

1271
01:24:33,702 --> 01:24:34,869
Come on, Paulie.

1272
01:24:35,078 --> 01:24:38,205
<i>Second and 10 from the 33. Crewe's
looking for Deacon once again.</i>

1273
01:24:38,414 --> 01:24:40,457
- He's open!
- He's open!

1274
01:24:41,125 --> 01:24:44,837
<i>But overthrows it.
And it's picked off by Papajohn.</i>

1275
01:24:45,045 --> 01:24:46,547
<i>Look out! He might go.</i>

1276
01:24:48,048 --> 01:24:49,675
<i>Say goodbye.</i>

1277
01:24:50,426 --> 01:24:51,343
<i>Touchdown!</i>

1278
01:24:53,346 --> 01:24:56,766
The first mistake
Crewe's made all day.

1279
01:24:59,685 --> 01:25:03,272
Short memory, baby.
We'll get it back. We'll get it back.

1280
01:25:03,439 --> 01:25:05,024
Defense, let's do this!

1281
01:25:06,191 --> 01:25:07,693
<i>8:38 left in the third quarter,</i>

1282
01:25:07,902 --> 01:25:09,820
<i>and Crewe has struggled
thus far in the second half.</i>

1283
01:25:10,029 --> 01:25:11,363
Hut!

1284
01:25:11,572 --> 01:25:14,909
<i>The pitch to Megget.
Oh, my! That ball is live!</i>

1285
01:25:15,868 --> 01:25:17,411
<i>It's picked up by Lambert.</i>

1286
01:25:17,620 --> 01:25:20,747
<i>He's at the 15, the 10,
and he will score!</i>

1287
01:25:22,373 --> 01:25:24,043
Yeah! Touchdown! Yeah!

1288
01:25:24,251 --> 01:25:28,297
<i>Crewe took a shot on that play
and he's getting up slowly.</i>

1289
01:25:28,505 --> 01:25:31,759
<i>Meanwhile, in the end zone, the guards
have something to celebrate,</i>

1290
01:25:31,967 --> 01:25:34,386
<i>as they find themselves up
by two touchdowns.</i>

1291
01:25:34,595 --> 01:25:37,972
<i>This is simply a different Paul Crewe
we're seeing here in the second half.</i>

1292
01:25:38,181 --> 01:25:40,558
There's the old Paul Crewe
we love to write about.

1293
01:25:40,767 --> 01:25:42,435
What the hell are you
doing out there?

1294
01:25:42,602 --> 01:25:44,062
I'm done.

1295
01:25:45,313 --> 01:25:46,731
I'm out. That's it.

1296
01:25:49,025 --> 01:25:50,693
- Where you hurting?
- My knee.

1297
01:25:50,902 --> 01:25:52,862
- Seems okay to me.
- Well, it ain't.

1298
01:25:55,407 --> 01:25:59,077
If Crewe can't go, I don't know how
deep these guys are at quarterback.

1299
01:26:01,079 --> 01:26:04,374
<i>The guards will try to keep it away
from Megget, so they'll pooch kick.</i>

1300
01:26:04,582 --> 01:26:05,792
Fair catch. Fair catch.

1301
01:26:05,959 --> 01:26:08,461
<i>As Big Tony calls for the fair catch.</i>

1302
01:26:08,920 --> 01:26:12,465
<i>Watch out. That was as late a hit
as I've ever seen.</i>

1303
01:26:14,133 --> 01:26:17,762
<i>And even some of the home crowd
not liking that one.</i>

1304
01:26:17,971 --> 01:26:19,012
Hang in there, partner.

1305
01:26:19,221 --> 01:26:23,016
Can of corn. Can of corn,
and I'll be fine. Can of corn.

1306
01:26:26,020 --> 01:26:28,147
Yeah, I'd have a hard time
looking at me too.

1307
01:26:28,648 --> 01:26:29,774
Brucie.

1308
01:26:29,983 --> 01:26:31,025
Yeah, coach.

1309
01:26:31,234 --> 01:26:34,529
You're the only one that knows
this offense, son. Now, do it.

1310
01:26:34,737 --> 01:26:36,990
<i>Coming into the game,
replacing the injured Paul Crewe,</i>

1311
01:26:37,156 --> 01:26:38,448
<i>is number 1, Brucie.</i>

1312
01:26:38,657 --> 01:26:40,409
All right, all right.
Crewe's playing like shit.

1313
01:26:40,617 --> 01:26:42,619
That's his problem.
I'm gonna bring us back.

1314
01:26:42,828 --> 01:26:45,080
Right, 32 Flex Dive Motion
on one. Ready!

1315
01:26:45,289 --> 01:26:46,206
Break!

1316
01:26:46,415 --> 01:26:48,875
Yeah. It's Brucie's
time to shine, baby.

1317
01:26:49,459 --> 01:26:51,795
Okay. Down, set. Hut!

1318
01:26:52,004 --> 01:26:55,758
<i>There's the snap and the ball is
fumbled. And the guards recover.</i>

1319
01:26:55,967 --> 01:26:57,635
I knew I shouldn't
have had that popcorn.

1320
01:26:58,719 --> 01:27:02,347
The guards are in command here
as we move late into the third quarter.

1321
01:27:02,556 --> 01:27:03,849
Ninety-eight. Hut! Hut!

1322
01:27:04,808 --> 01:27:07,686
<i>The give is to Potter.
Back to Knauer.</i>

1323
01:27:07,895 --> 01:27:10,063
<i>He's got a man open
deep downfield.</i>

1324
01:27:10,314 --> 01:27:12,149
<i>He'll throw the flea-flicker!</i>

1325
01:27:12,316 --> 01:27:14,902
<i>And he's got it. Touchdown, guards.</i>

1326
01:27:15,068 --> 01:27:18,030
<i>And this game is starting
to look like a blowout.</i>

1327
01:27:20,031 --> 01:27:23,952
Hey, man, after all Caretaker did,
this is how you show him love?

1328
01:27:24,119 --> 01:27:25,454
Don't worry about it.

1329
01:27:25,621 --> 01:27:27,831
You haven't changed one damn bit.

1330
01:27:32,085 --> 01:27:33,754
All right. Down, set!

1331
01:27:33,921 --> 01:27:35,130
<i>Back in at quarterback is Brucie,</i>

1332
01:27:35,339 --> 01:27:38,050
<i>who will try to find a handle
on the ball this time.</i>

1333
01:27:39,175 --> 01:27:40,384
Throw it, Brucie!

1334
01:27:40,885 --> 01:27:42,303
Oh, shit!

1335
01:27:42,595 --> 01:27:43,971
<i>And look out.</i>

1336
01:27:47,850 --> 01:27:49,810
<i>What a shot he took!</i>

1337
01:27:50,102 --> 01:27:51,395
How much more blood do you want?

1338
01:27:54,441 --> 01:27:58,028
<i>I think the cons are just about
out of options at quarterback.</i>

1339
01:28:16,629 --> 01:28:18,673
Hey, Skitchy,
let me ask you something.

1340
01:28:19,548 --> 01:28:22,300
When you popped the warden,
was it worth it?

1341
01:28:22,509 --> 01:28:24,554
Was it worth spending
the rest of your life in here?

1342
01:28:25,221 --> 01:28:28,891
Was it worth it? It was worth
every goddamn second.

1343
01:28:36,524 --> 01:28:38,234
What the hell is he doing?

1344
01:28:41,069 --> 01:28:44,531
Paul Crewe must be feeling better,
because here he comes.

1345
01:28:44,739 --> 01:28:47,033
All right, I missed you guys,
so I'm back.

1346
01:28:47,200 --> 01:28:49,369
We got a lot of work to do.
Let's get it going.

1347
01:28:49,578 --> 01:28:52,038
Deuce right, 89. Fly on two. Ready?

1348
01:28:54,291 --> 01:28:55,334
Break.

1349
01:28:56,794 --> 01:28:59,713
<i>As we start the fourth quarter,
cons down by three touchdowns.</i>

1350
01:28:59,921 --> 01:29:01,172
Wide left! Tight left!

1351
01:29:02,841 --> 01:29:04,759
Black 90. Hut! Hut!

1352
01:29:05,010 --> 01:29:07,470
<i>Here comes the blitz,
and no one's blocking!</i>

1353
01:29:07,637 --> 01:29:10,515
<i>And Crewe will be sacked
for a big loss.</i>

1354
01:29:11,182 --> 01:29:15,061
<i>That looked like a message to Crewe
from his offensive line.</i>

1355
01:29:16,646 --> 01:29:18,273
Did you see that, man?
They're quitting on him.

1356
01:29:18,481 --> 01:29:20,399
Okay, baby. Jailbreak Blitz. Ready?

1357
01:29:20,733 --> 01:29:22,776
We got that out of the way.
I deserved it.

1358
01:29:22,985 --> 01:29:25,238
- Now we gotta play some football.
- Switch it! Switch it!

1359
01:29:25,447 --> 01:29:27,449
<i>Cons need to do something
to get back in this game.</i>

1360
01:29:27,657 --> 01:29:29,409
<i>And that's not it!</i>

1361
01:29:30,160 --> 01:29:32,078
<i>And Crewe is leveled!</i>

1362
01:29:32,287 --> 01:29:34,497
I don't think he's gonna get up
from that one.

1363
01:29:34,706 --> 01:29:36,082
Nice hit!

1364
01:29:37,918 --> 01:29:40,419
<i>But he is. And I don't know how,
after that last hit.</i>

1365
01:29:40,628 --> 01:29:41,712
All right, punt team!

1366
01:29:41,879 --> 01:29:44,173
Keep them off the field!
We're going for it.

1367
01:29:44,340 --> 01:29:46,133
Dumbshits are going for it!
Let's go! Let's go!

1368
01:29:46,508 --> 01:29:49,303
Come on back, if he wants to get
his ass kicked. Come on back.

1369
01:29:49,511 --> 01:29:50,679
<i>This is unbelievable.</i>

1370
01:29:50,888 --> 01:29:54,893
Fine. You guys don't wanna help me,
I'll do it on my own. On two.

1371
01:29:55,852 --> 01:29:57,062
Let's go, to the line.

1372
01:29:57,270 --> 01:29:58,521
<i>On fourth and 20,</i>

1373
01:29:58,730 --> 01:30:01,398
<i>the cons are gonna go for it.
This could be the ball game right here.</i>

1374
01:30:01,607 --> 01:30:03,567
Red 98. Hut! Hut!

1375
01:30:05,152 --> 01:30:08,656
<i>Crewe dodges the blitz,
but he loses his helmet.</i>

1376
01:30:11,992 --> 01:30:13,452
<i>And he's not going down.</i>

1377
01:30:18,832 --> 01:30:21,000
<i>He's got the first down.</i>

1378
01:30:21,209 --> 01:30:22,418
Time-out!

1379
01:30:23,044 --> 01:30:24,671
- Man, oh, man.
- Not bad.

1380
01:30:31,929 --> 01:30:33,097
Huddle up.

1381
01:30:34,181 --> 01:30:35,140
Look.

1382
01:30:36,183 --> 01:30:39,478
I'm sure you already know this,
but I never said it out loud.

1383
01:30:40,937 --> 01:30:42,605
I did throw that game.

1384
01:30:44,023 --> 01:30:45,233
I did it.

1385
01:30:46,067 --> 01:30:48,778
I was in a bad way
with some worse people.

1386
01:30:49,571 --> 01:30:50,863
After I did it,

1387
01:30:51,030 --> 01:30:54,909
I felt so shitty I wish I would have
just let them kill me instead.

1388
01:30:55,536 --> 01:30:59,748
Now the warden wants to pin
Caretaker's murder on me

1389
01:30:59,915 --> 01:31:01,791
if I don't throw this game.

1390
01:31:03,543 --> 01:31:05,920
So it looks like I'm gonna get
to know you guys a lot better,

1391
01:31:06,087 --> 01:31:08,631
because I ain't doing that
twice in a lifetime.

1392
01:31:08,840 --> 01:31:11,885
We got a little time left.
We can still do this.

1393
01:31:12,093 --> 01:31:15,054
I'm begging you.
Put your hands in here.

1394
01:31:24,396 --> 01:31:27,358
Okay. Thank you. Now, who are we?

1395
01:31:27,567 --> 01:31:28,526
Mean Machine!

1396
01:31:28,735 --> 01:31:31,029
Come on, Mean Machine, let's go!

1397
01:31:34,198 --> 01:31:35,408
That's great news.

1398
01:31:35,617 --> 01:31:38,244
All right. We got ourselves a game.

1399
01:31:38,453 --> 01:31:39,996
Brown 65. Hut!

1400
01:31:40,204 --> 01:31:44,082
<i>First and 10 from the 30.
Crewe finds Deacon open in the flat.</i>

1401
01:31:46,084 --> 01:31:47,044
Hut!

1402
01:31:48,670 --> 01:31:51,423
<i>The give is to Megget. And he fights
his way for a 9-yard gain.</i>

1403
01:31:51,590 --> 01:31:53,258
One yard, baby. One more yard.

1404
01:31:54,551 --> 01:31:55,552
Hut! Hut!

1405
01:31:55,761 --> 01:31:57,680
<i>Crewe tries a sneak. Or is it?</i>

1406
01:31:57,889 --> 01:31:59,307
<i>He flips it back to Megget.</i>

1407
01:31:59,766 --> 01:32:02,684
<i>Megget's got the first down
and more.</i>

1408
01:32:09,775 --> 01:32:13,570
<i>And Megget is down to the 4-yard
line, where it'll be first and goal.</i>

1409
01:32:13,779 --> 01:32:14,821
Hut!

1410
01:32:15,822 --> 01:32:19,284
<i>Crewe hands it to Turley.
And look at the big man go.</i>

1411
01:32:19,493 --> 01:32:20,661
Tackle him!

1412
01:32:26,166 --> 01:32:27,167
<i>Touchdown!</i>

1413
01:32:28,252 --> 01:32:32,339
That was some rumbling, bumbling
stumbling right there.

1414
01:32:32,506 --> 01:32:34,216
<i>And listen to the crowd</i>

1415
01:32:34,424 --> 01:32:37,886
<i>as this underdog con team
is starting to win them over.</i>

1416
01:32:45,643 --> 01:32:49,105
<i>Third down and 6. Guards have
the ball on their own 29-yard line.</i>

1417
01:32:49,313 --> 01:32:51,691
<i>Knauer needs a first down
to put this game away.</i>

1418
01:32:51,899 --> 01:32:53,276
White 50!

1419
01:32:53,859 --> 01:32:54,860
White 50!

1420
01:32:55,069 --> 01:32:57,114
<i>And look at Battle take off.</i>

1421
01:32:58,490 --> 01:32:59,908
<i>He knocks the ball loose!</i>

1422
01:33:01,118 --> 01:33:05,496
<i>There's a dogpile in the backfield.
The refs are trying to sort it out.</i>

1423
01:33:08,082 --> 01:33:09,667
My arm!

1424
01:33:10,501 --> 01:33:12,503
<i>The cons recover!</i>

1425
01:33:13,129 --> 01:33:15,840
We got the ball! We got the ball!
We got it! We got it!

1426
01:33:16,591 --> 01:33:20,845
With just over two minutes left to be
played, this has turned into a game.

1427
01:33:21,220 --> 01:33:24,806
<i>Crewe will start in great field position
at the guards' 25.</i>

1428
01:33:24,973 --> 01:33:28,436
<i>And look at this formation.
The guards, they're confused.</i>

1429
01:33:28,644 --> 01:33:29,645
Shift over! Move!

1430
01:33:29,854 --> 01:33:32,023
<i>They're trying to call time-out,
but there's the snap.</i>

1431
01:33:35,735 --> 01:33:39,113
<i>Moss is behind a wall of cons. I
wouldn't wanna be in front of that thing.</i>

1432
01:33:42,240 --> 01:33:43,575
<i>And they'll score!</i>

1433
01:33:48,538 --> 01:33:50,999
- Hey! Is that legal?
- Yeah, it is.

1434
01:33:51,208 --> 01:33:52,959
- Is that a touchdown?
- Yes, it is.

1435
01:33:53,168 --> 01:33:55,921
What is going on here? Shit!

1436
01:33:56,421 --> 01:33:59,508
<i>And with the extra point,
the cons are down by just seven.</i>

1437
01:34:06,640 --> 01:34:08,850
- Brucie!
- Yeah. Yeah, coach.

1438
01:34:09,351 --> 01:34:11,311
I want you to go out there
and kick off.

1439
01:34:11,519 --> 01:34:13,313
- I can do it.
- Kick off!

1440
01:34:13,772 --> 01:34:15,482
Brucie can't kick worth a shit.

1441
01:34:15,690 --> 01:34:18,360
I know. Recover the ball.

1442
01:34:18,777 --> 01:34:21,488
Jesus Christ, my savior.
If you help me out with this one,

1443
01:34:21,696 --> 01:34:25,032
I promise to stop cheating on my wife
with black guys. Amen.

1444
01:34:25,241 --> 01:34:27,327
<i>Back in the game is Brucie,
and he'll do the honors.</i>

1445
01:34:27,536 --> 01:34:29,037
<i>And it's a horrible kick.</i>

1446
01:34:29,246 --> 01:34:30,705
<i>But the ball is tipped!</i>

1447
01:34:31,581 --> 01:34:33,959
<i>And the cons have come up with it!</i>

1448
01:34:35,168 --> 01:34:37,546
- We got it! One time-out.
- Got it. Got it.

1449
01:34:37,712 --> 01:34:41,007
That's it, Brucie. Hey, hey!
My bad. My bad. My bad. Come on.

1450
01:34:42,383 --> 01:34:43,801
Give me that.

1451
01:34:44,718 --> 01:34:45,719
Damn...

1452
01:34:47,221 --> 01:34:49,348
Well, that felt unnecessary.

1453
01:34:49,557 --> 01:34:52,226
<i>Cons have enough time
for one final drive.</i>

1454
01:34:53,269 --> 01:34:55,479
<i>Crewe drops back to pass.
He's under pressure.</i>

1455
01:34:55,729 --> 01:34:58,191
<i>- Watch the pass!
- He's looking for Deacon.</i>

1456
01:34:58,400 --> 01:35:00,068
<i>He gets the ball up, but he's leveled.</i>

1457
01:35:01,027 --> 01:35:03,696
<i>And Deacon's got it for a first down,
but he stayed inbounds.</i>

1458
01:35:03,904 --> 01:35:05,781
<i>Tick, tick, tick.
The clock keeps running.</i>

1459
01:35:05,906 --> 01:35:08,826
Clock's running. Clock's still running!
Clock's still running!

1460
01:35:08,993 --> 01:35:09,952
On the ball!

1461
01:35:10,160 --> 01:35:12,079
Goddamn it! Do something!

1462
01:35:12,288 --> 01:35:13,247
Hut!

1463
01:35:14,081 --> 01:35:17,126
<i>Crewe. He's looking to throw.
Under pressure again.</i>

1464
01:35:17,334 --> 01:35:19,670
Go! Get rid of it! Go! Go!

1465
01:35:19,879 --> 01:35:22,006
<i>He pitches it to Megget.
He's got some room.</i>

1466
01:35:22,214 --> 01:35:24,716
Here we go. Here we go.
Go, Megg! Go, Megget!

1467
01:35:25,216 --> 01:35:27,636
- Go, Megget!
- Get him!

1468
01:35:27,845 --> 01:35:30,139
<i>He could go all the way!</i>

1469
01:35:30,347 --> 01:35:31,515
<i>But he won't!</i>

1470
01:35:31,682 --> 01:35:32,766
Goddamn it!

1471
01:35:32,975 --> 01:35:35,269
<i>And Megget is hit hard
at the 4, and he's hurt.</i>

1472
01:35:35,477 --> 01:35:36,812
My knee, man!

1473
01:35:39,064 --> 01:35:41,775
You busted your knee for us,
we'll bust our ass for you.

1474
01:35:41,942 --> 01:35:43,693
Hey, coach, I need a back!

1475
01:35:43,860 --> 01:35:45,111
Just win this shit.

1476
01:35:47,030 --> 01:35:48,323
I'm going in.

1477
01:35:48,531 --> 01:35:50,074
Coach, you serious?

1478
01:35:50,283 --> 01:35:51,784
Yeah, I'm serious.

1479
01:35:51,993 --> 01:35:54,412
<i>And look who's
coming into the game.</i>

1480
01:35:54,996 --> 01:35:56,623
You can do it!

1481
01:35:56,831 --> 01:35:59,877
Get that old ass of yours
in the end zone!

1482
01:36:00,085 --> 01:36:02,504
We gotta win this thing! Come on!

1483
01:36:04,172 --> 01:36:06,841
No, no, no. Hey, old man.

1484
01:36:07,050 --> 01:36:08,927
Absolutely not.
You're gonna get killed out here.

1485
01:36:09,135 --> 01:36:12,013
They've been trying that for years.
Don't worry, I got the perfect play.

1486
01:36:12,180 --> 01:36:14,307
- I ain't handing you the ball.
- You don't have to.

1487
01:36:14,515 --> 01:36:17,810
<i>Nate Scarborough, the former
Heisman Trophy winner from 1955,</i>

1488
01:36:18,019 --> 01:36:19,187
<i>is gonna play tailback,</i>

1489
01:36:19,354 --> 01:36:21,814
<i>but he's gotta be in there more
for moral support than anything.</i>

1490
01:36:22,023 --> 01:36:24,691
Mean Machine. Mean Machine.

1491
01:36:24,900 --> 01:36:27,527
Mean Machine. Mean Machine.

1492
01:36:27,736 --> 01:36:31,866
<i>Mean Machine, Mean Machine
Mean Machine</i>

1493
01:36:32,075 --> 01:36:33,409
<i>Mean Machine!</i>

1494
01:36:33,618 --> 01:36:34,661
<i>Mean Machine!</i>

1495
01:36:35,662 --> 01:36:38,206
<i>Six seconds left on the clock.
Cons down by seven.</i>

1496
01:36:38,414 --> 01:36:40,291
<i>They must score on this play.</i>

1497
01:36:42,669 --> 01:36:43,877
Don't let them through!

1498
01:36:45,796 --> 01:36:47,130
Down, set!

1499
01:36:47,631 --> 01:36:50,175
- Black 99!
- Come on, D!

1500
01:36:50,384 --> 01:36:53,220
Black 99! Hut! Hut!

1501
01:36:53,762 --> 01:36:55,514
<i>The give is to the big man, Turley.</i>

1502
01:36:56,056 --> 01:36:59,310
<i>He's stopped by Lambert
at the line for no gain.</i>

1503
01:36:59,978 --> 01:37:01,479
<i>No! Wait!</i>

1504
01:37:02,397 --> 01:37:05,107
<i>The ball's picked up
by Scarborough.</i>

1505
01:37:07,859 --> 01:37:09,444
Come on!

1506
01:37:14,658 --> 01:37:16,285
<i>Touchdown!</i>

1507
01:37:24,542 --> 01:37:26,294
<i>What an amazing comeback, folks!</i>

1508
01:37:26,502 --> 01:37:29,006
<i>Taking a play from
the old Nebraska playbook.</i>

1509
01:37:29,214 --> 01:37:30,173
The Fumblerooskie.

1510
01:37:30,382 --> 01:37:31,884
Easy. Easy.

1511
01:37:32,092 --> 01:37:33,468
You still alive, old man?

1512
01:37:34,970 --> 01:37:36,430
Never felt better in my life.

1513
01:37:36,638 --> 01:37:38,682
You're a sick bastard. Come here.

1514
01:37:39,391 --> 01:37:40,851
All right.

1515
01:37:41,059 --> 01:37:45,104
And now the cons are a mere
extra point away from overtime.

1516
01:37:45,271 --> 01:37:46,689
Mean Machine!

1517
01:37:50,026 --> 01:37:53,279
Team vote: We go for the win?
We go for the tie?

1518
01:37:53,446 --> 01:37:56,699
Hell, guys, we're convicts.
We always go for it all.

1519
01:37:57,200 --> 01:38:00,829
Unfortunately, that's why
we're all in the joint.

1520
01:38:01,288 --> 01:38:02,456
What would Caretaker do?

1521
01:38:04,207 --> 01:38:05,416
Give me that blackboard.

1522
01:38:05,750 --> 01:38:06,751
Yeah, come on!

1523
01:38:07,501 --> 01:38:08,419
Come on.

1524
01:38:10,838 --> 01:38:11,964
Are you serious?

1525
01:38:12,173 --> 01:38:13,758
I don't know. That play is wack.

1526
01:38:13,925 --> 01:38:14,967
It's gonna work.

1527
01:38:16,177 --> 01:38:18,304
It's gonna work. Let's go. On the ball.

1528
01:38:18,471 --> 01:38:19,430
Come on! Let's go!

1529
01:38:19,639 --> 01:38:21,557
Let's go, y'all! Let's go!

1530
01:38:21,766 --> 01:38:23,309
I think it's gonna work.

1531
01:38:24,351 --> 01:38:26,061
Get them out there.

1532
01:38:28,521 --> 01:38:31,442
<i>And wait a minute.
Crewe is coming back into the game.</i>

1533
01:38:31,651 --> 01:38:33,361
<i>The cons are gonna go for the win.</i>

1534
01:38:33,569 --> 01:38:34,570
They're going for it.

1535
01:38:35,821 --> 01:38:38,783
<i>Crewe, trying to settle his team
into formation.</i>

1536
01:38:38,950 --> 01:38:40,785
<i>But there seems to be
a lot of confusion.</i>

1537
01:38:40,993 --> 01:38:42,620
Come on! Run the play!

1538
01:38:42,787 --> 01:38:45,038
Turley! Turley. Over here.

1539
01:38:45,247 --> 01:38:47,707
Move your giant ass right here!
Right here.

1540
01:38:47,916 --> 01:38:49,626
Come on, baby. Come on.

1541
01:38:51,002 --> 01:38:54,089
<i>The play clock is still running.
Crewe better call a time-out.</i>

1542
01:38:54,297 --> 01:38:55,257
Come on, Crewe!

1543
01:38:57,175 --> 01:38:58,885
They don't know what we're doing!

1544
01:38:59,095 --> 01:39:00,596
Run the play we set up.

1545
01:39:00,805 --> 01:39:02,974
I think you're still dizzy from that hit!

1546
01:39:03,933 --> 01:39:05,809
<i>The snap is to Deacon.</i>

1547
01:39:06,017 --> 01:39:07,269
It's a trick.

1548
01:39:07,477 --> 01:39:09,396
<i>He throws it to Crewe.</i>

1549
01:39:32,002 --> 01:39:34,087
<i>They did it! Unbelievable!</i>

1550
01:39:34,296 --> 01:39:35,672
<i>The cons win!</i>

1551
01:39:48,726 --> 01:39:50,019
We win!

1552
01:39:50,185 --> 01:39:52,980
Group hug in the shower tonight!

1553
01:39:54,940 --> 01:39:57,067
Or not. Or not.

1554
01:39:59,069 --> 01:40:00,322
<i>Well, there you have it.</i>

1555
01:40:00,530 --> 01:40:02,657
<i>A bunch of ruthless criminals
have beaten</i>

1556
01:40:02,824 --> 01:40:05,284
<i>the men that uphold
our justice system.</i>

1557
01:40:05,492 --> 01:40:07,411
Criminals are people too, Chris.

1558
01:40:07,578 --> 01:40:08,829
Now, give me your wallet.

1559
01:40:09,455 --> 01:40:10,372
What?

1560
01:40:10,831 --> 01:40:12,458
Just kidding.

1561
01:40:16,378 --> 01:40:20,007
You got a lot of balls, Crewe.
You played a hell of a game.

1562
01:40:20,174 --> 01:40:23,844
And don't worry, I know you had
nothing to do with Caretaker's murder.

1563
01:40:24,053 --> 01:40:25,094
And I'll back that up.

1564
01:40:26,846 --> 01:40:28,181
Thank you, baby.

1565
01:40:29,767 --> 01:40:32,186
<i>Mean Machine! Mean Machine!</i>

1566
01:40:35,147 --> 01:40:39,485
You humiliated me. I can't believe
you couldn't even win a fixed game.

1567
01:40:41,946 --> 01:40:44,365
Now, where the hell
does he think he's going?

1568
01:40:47,700 --> 01:40:48,826
He's escaping.

1569
01:40:49,244 --> 01:40:50,328
He's escaping.

1570
01:40:50,537 --> 01:40:52,539
Officer, shoot that man!

1571
01:40:52,705 --> 01:40:54,457
But, sir, there's people.

1572
01:40:56,125 --> 01:40:57,126
Shoot him.

1573
01:40:58,086 --> 01:40:59,045
Crewe!

1574
01:40:59,712 --> 01:41:02,216
Captain, I order you
to shoot that prisoner.

1575
01:41:05,343 --> 01:41:07,303
Shoot him! Fire!

1576
01:41:07,512 --> 01:41:08,805
Crewe!

1577
01:41:08,972 --> 01:41:11,808
Damn it, I'm giving you an order,
captain!

1578
01:41:12,016 --> 01:41:12,934
Crewe!

1579
01:41:13,101 --> 01:41:14,852
Pull the trigger!

1580
01:41:33,413 --> 01:41:35,582
It's the game ball.

1581
01:41:42,255 --> 01:41:43,298
Hey.

1582
01:41:47,050 --> 01:41:49,845
Why don't you stick this
in your trophy case.

1583
01:41:51,847 --> 01:41:53,974
- You have a nice time, old man?
- Yeah.

1584
01:41:54,141 --> 01:41:56,935
Yeah? Okay.
So, what do we do now?

1585
01:41:57,102 --> 01:41:59,646
Well, the first thing is, we tell the
team where they're hiding Unger.

1586
01:41:59,855 --> 01:42:03,109
Oh, I can't wait to see
what Switowski does to him.

1587
01:42:09,740 --> 01:42:11,158
Great game, sir.

1588
01:42:13,911 --> 01:42:15,329
That's a week in the hotbox!

1589
01:42:15,537 --> 01:42:17,331
Who gives a shit?