1 00:00:03,734 --> 00:00:06,576 Into the scandalous lives of Manhattan's elite. André Leon talley is raving 2 00:00:06,577 --> 00:00:09,739 about the finale dress, loved it. 3 00:00:09,740 --> 00:00:12,342 My dress? Is that what you told headmistress queller, 4 00:00:12,343 --> 00:00:15,245 that you don't care about all the school you've missed? I told her I'm not coming back. 5 00:00:15,246 --> 00:00:17,517 I tried to write, but there was something in the way. 6 00:00:17,518 --> 00:00:20,590 I couldn't focus. You'll get no letter of recommendation from me. 7 00:00:20,591 --> 00:00:23,523 (Eleanor) The captain is being charged 8 00:00:23,524 --> 00:00:26,656 with embezzlement and fraud. This is an absolute disaster. (Hazel) Serena is in "women's wear daily." 9 00:00:26,657 --> 00:00:28,698 I'm just tired of trying to hold myself back 10 00:00:28,699 --> 00:00:30,300 so I don't outshine you. Excuse me? 11 00:00:30,301 --> 00:00:32,502 (Serena) From now on, I'm gonna be who I am. 12 00:00:32,503 --> 00:00:34,804 And who am I? 13 00:00:34,805 --> 00:00:38,338 That's a secret I'll never tell. 14 00:00:38,339 --> 00:00:40,340 You know you love me. 15 00:00:40,341 --> 00:00:48,341 X.o.x.o., gossip girl. 16 00:00:48,349 --> 00:00:51,282 ("The rain in Spain" from "my fair lady" playing) 17 00:00:54,625 --> 00:00:57,727 The rain in Spain 18 00:00:57,728 --> 00:00:59,659 stays mainly 19 00:00:59,660 --> 00:01:01,731 in the plain. 20 00:01:01,732 --> 00:01:03,094 Again. 21 00:01:04,765 --> 00:01:07,737 (Cockney accent) The... rain... 22 00:01:07,738 --> 00:01:12,142 In... Spain... 23 00:01:12,143 --> 00:01:16,406 Stays... Mainly in the... plain? 24 00:01:16,407 --> 00:01:17,847 (Sighs) 25 00:01:17,848 --> 00:01:21,281 Well, I'm a straight- "a" student, I am. (Gasps) 26 00:01:21,282 --> 00:01:24,614 The rain in... Spain... 27 00:01:24,615 --> 00:01:26,456 (British accent) The rain in Spain 28 00:01:26,457 --> 00:01:29,088 stays mainly in the plain. 29 00:01:29,089 --> 00:01:31,090 By George, I think she's got it. 30 00:01:31,091 --> 00:01:32,292 I do? 31 00:01:32,293 --> 00:01:35,565 No. 32 00:01:35,566 --> 00:01:37,867 She does. 33 00:01:37,868 --> 00:01:42,572 (Laughs) 34 00:01:42,573 --> 00:01:44,834 (Screams) 35 00:01:44,835 --> 00:01:46,876 (Crying) 36 00:01:46,877 --> 00:01:50,140 (Alarm ringing) 37 00:01:50,141 --> 00:01:52,282 (Gossip girl) Rise and shine, early birds. 38 00:01:52,283 --> 00:01:54,144 Gossip girl here. 39 00:01:54,145 --> 00:01:59,389 (Turns off alarm) 40 00:01:59,390 --> 00:02:01,120 Some fun and freudian... 41 00:02:01,121 --> 00:02:02,752 Morning, miss Blair. 42 00:02:02,753 --> 00:02:06,356 And some are the dreams we've had our whole lives. 43 00:02:06,357 --> 00:02:09,529 Dorota, can you believe that in just three short hours, 44 00:02:09,530 --> 00:02:12,862 I'll be stepping through the gates of Yale? You used to sleep in your father's sweatshirt 45 00:02:12,863 --> 00:02:16,436 every night until it fell apart. I'll get a new one, 46 00:02:16,437 --> 00:02:20,470 right after I attend 47 00:02:20,471 --> 00:02:25,545 most candidates think it's an urban legend, 48 00:02:25,546 --> 00:02:27,747 but she was very specific about your breakfast. 49 00:02:27,748 --> 00:02:30,580 Some kombucha, miss Blair? Since the Dean handpicks the guests 50 00:02:30,581 --> 00:02:33,423 right after their interviews, I'm a shoo-in. 51 00:02:33,424 --> 00:02:36,286 If there's one thing I know, it's that I give good interview. 52 00:02:36,287 --> 00:02:38,459 I could make Larry king cry. 53 00:02:41,432 --> 00:02:43,763 I am so proud of you. 54 00:02:43,764 --> 00:02:45,865 And I'm so ready 55 00:02:45,866 --> 00:02:50,240 to be surrounded by people more like me and less like... 56 00:02:50,241 --> 00:02:52,542 Her. 57 00:02:52,543 --> 00:02:55,476 (Scoffs) You've got to be kidding me. 58 00:02:56,847 --> 00:02:57,907 Ready? 59 00:02:57,908 --> 00:02:59,909 Oh, yeah. Um, I'm all packed up. 60 00:02:59,910 --> 00:03:02,912 You excited, me at your Alma mater? 61 00:03:02,913 --> 00:03:04,914 So I guess that means you turned down 62 00:03:04,915 --> 00:03:07,587 this, uh, personal invitation to tour Yale? 63 00:03:07,588 --> 00:03:10,860 Brown's always been my plan, just like it was for you. And I loved it there, 64 00:03:10,861 --> 00:03:15,194 but if Yale had invited me, I would have said yes. 65 00:03:15,195 --> 00:03:18,798 The, uh, invitation is handwritten, Serena, in cursive. 66 00:03:18,799 --> 00:03:21,401 Yale is for overachieving bookworms 67 00:03:21,402 --> 00:03:23,673 and preppies... The blairs of the world. 68 00:03:23,674 --> 00:03:26,676 Even though the two of us aren't exactly on speaking terms, 69 00:03:26,677 --> 00:03:29,439 there's no way I would step on that particular land mine. 70 00:03:29,440 --> 00:03:31,411 Miss Serena and you are still not speaking? 71 00:03:31,412 --> 00:03:34,414 Not a word in a week, though I can't seem to escape her. 72 00:03:34,415 --> 00:03:36,416 Ever since my mother's show, 73 00:03:36,417 --> 00:03:38,248 Manhattan has turned into serenaville. 74 00:03:38,249 --> 00:03:42,453 I heard Marc Jacobs named a purse after her. 75 00:03:43,954 --> 00:03:47,827 Well, I simply don't understand the fascination. 76 00:03:47,828 --> 00:03:50,760 (Sighs) Fortunately, Yale is out of her reach. 77 00:03:50,761 --> 00:03:53,333 It's okay, Serena. You don't have to hide the photo. 78 00:03:53,334 --> 00:03:56,866 I've seen it. I'm sorry they called you my unidentified friend. 79 00:03:56,867 --> 00:03:59,569 Well, I guess it's better than "mother." What's in the bag? 80 00:03:59,570 --> 00:04:02,442 It's my dress for the fall dinner at the frick. 81 00:04:02,443 --> 00:04:05,975 Eleanor sent them over. I don't know why there's two. 82 00:04:05,976 --> 00:04:09,279 This one's a little edgier than I thought, but I like it. 83 00:04:09,280 --> 00:04:11,621 Apparently it's for me. 84 00:04:11,622 --> 00:04:13,453 (Laughs) 85 00:04:13,454 --> 00:04:20,460 Oh, this must be mine. 86 00:04:20,461 --> 00:04:23,293 Of the paper? It's white. No, no, no. It's not white. It's soft ecru. 87 00:04:23,294 --> 00:04:25,495 This is... that's white. 88 00:04:25,496 --> 00:04:28,538 I like the ecru myself, but I'm not sure about the font. Don't worry. You'll be fine. 89 00:04:28,539 --> 00:04:31,541 More than fine. You're the perfect Yale candidate. Maybe, but I-I can't help thinking 90 00:04:31,542 --> 00:04:35,044 that Yale is for presidents, not Humphreys. As the man who cursed you with the Humphrey moniker... 91 00:04:35,045 --> 00:04:37,447 I didn't say "cursed." "Cursed" would be cruel. 92 00:04:37,448 --> 00:04:39,849 I now feel compelled to give a speech. 93 00:04:39,850 --> 00:04:42,582 Daniel, my son, you have near perfect grades, 94 00:04:42,583 --> 00:04:45,715 excellent s.A.T.S, more talent than money could ever buy. Yeah, but... 95 00:04:45,716 --> 00:04:49,018 After that, you find a "but"? What if it's not enough? 96 00:04:49,019 --> 00:04:51,891 If that's not enough, then there's something wrong 97 00:04:51,892 --> 00:04:55,024 with Yale, not you. Thanks, dad. All right, well, I'm... I'm off. 98 00:04:55,025 --> 00:04:57,467 It's just me, the best english department in America 99 00:04:57,468 --> 00:04:59,429 and a hundred other highly competitive 100 00:04:59,430 --> 00:05:02,602 extremely nervous, wannabe yalies. Get excited, Archibald. 101 00:05:02,603 --> 00:05:06,536 We are three hours away from horny women's studies majors 102 00:05:06,537 --> 00:05:09,639 wanting to work out all their anger towards men 103 00:05:09,640 --> 00:05:11,080 in their bunk beds. 104 00:05:11,081 --> 00:05:16,085 My heart's still set on u.S.C. 105 00:05:16,086 --> 00:05:19,018 'Cause the Vanderbilt side of her family practically owns it. 106 00:05:19,019 --> 00:05:22,452 Think of it this way. Yale is your safety school. 107 00:05:22,453 --> 00:05:24,624 I mean, I guess I could get away 108 00:05:24,625 --> 00:05:27,457 from all the drama on the other side of my family 109 00:05:27,458 --> 00:05:30,500 and go someplace where they don't know me or the captain. We blow off the formal visit crap 110 00:05:30,501 --> 00:05:32,502 and focus on what really matters... 111 00:05:32,503 --> 00:05:34,664 Creating your own freshman 15. 112 00:05:34,665 --> 00:05:36,936 Are you not seriously considering 113 00:05:36,937 --> 00:05:40,370 going to Yale either? I'm, uh, evaluating colleges based on secret societies. 114 00:05:40,371 --> 00:05:43,673 Yale has the crème de la crème, the skull and bones. 115 00:05:43,674 --> 00:05:46,075 My goal is to get inside their inner sanctum. 116 00:05:46,076 --> 00:05:50,420 And how exactly are you planning to do that? By showing up. 117 00:05:50,421 --> 00:05:53,052 This weekend concludes college visits. 118 00:05:53,053 --> 00:05:55,525 The schools you will be visiting... 119 00:05:55,526 --> 00:05:58,357 Harvard, Yale and brown... Are among the best in the world. 120 00:05:58,358 --> 00:05:59,759 You are ambassadors 121 00:05:59,760 --> 00:06:01,661 of constance billard and St. Jude's, 122 00:06:01,662 --> 00:06:04,464 as well as your own families. 123 00:06:04,465 --> 00:06:07,066 We urge you to present yourselves 124 00:06:07,067 --> 00:06:10,069 in the best possible light. Good luck. I wonder what lucky school 125 00:06:10,070 --> 00:06:12,542 will be the subject of the next nursery rhyme 126 00:06:12,543 --> 00:06:14,944 penned by Brooklyn's lamest fiction writer? 127 00:06:14,945 --> 00:06:17,947 Actually, Chuck, I think the Dean of admissions at Yale 128 00:06:17,948 --> 00:06:22,912 will actually appreciate my ability 129 00:06:22,913 --> 00:06:25,485 how nice. Say hello to the characters 130 00:06:25,486 --> 00:06:27,787 on public transportation for me. 131 00:06:27,788 --> 00:06:29,088 Hey. 132 00:06:29,089 --> 00:06:30,960 So you're off to Yale? 133 00:06:30,961 --> 00:06:32,962 Your deductive reasoning skills are perfect 134 00:06:32,963 --> 00:06:35,665 for a place like brown. A place like brown? 135 00:06:35,666 --> 00:06:38,828 An enclave of trustafarians and children of celebrities 136 00:06:38,829 --> 00:06:40,900 who major in drum circles 137 00:06:40,901 --> 00:06:43,673 and semiotics, whatever that is. 138 00:06:43,674 --> 00:06:46,636 I can't wait for you to come home next Thanksgiving 139 00:06:46,637 --> 00:06:50,580 a militant veganista, anemic and proud. Brown is an Ivy league school. 140 00:06:50,581 --> 00:06:52,181 Everyone knows that the only real ivies 141 00:06:52,182 --> 00:06:55,044 are the holy Trinity... Harvard, Yale and Princeton. 142 00:06:55,045 --> 00:06:57,587 I know you may find this hard to believe, 143 00:06:57,588 --> 00:06:59,719 but not everyone wants to go to Yale 144 00:06:59,720 --> 00:07:02,452 because not everyone wants to be Blair Waldorf. 145 00:07:02,453 --> 00:07:03,893 Not everyone can be. 146 00:07:03,894 --> 00:07:06,856 Since we're not friends anymore, let me speak frankly. 147 00:07:06,857 --> 00:07:10,460 You're not that smart. You lack focus and discipline. 148 00:07:10,461 --> 00:07:12,061 Charm is all well and good, 149 00:07:12,062 --> 00:07:14,063 but in the real world, knowledge is power. 150 00:07:14,064 --> 00:07:15,805 You wouldn't make it 151 00:07:15,806 --> 00:07:17,807 past the first round of admissions at Yale, 152 00:07:17,808 --> 00:07:19,709 no matter how hard you tried. 153 00:07:19,710 --> 00:07:22,111 Have fun in Providence. Oh, and, you know, 154 00:07:22,112 --> 00:07:25,675 maybe you can get your hair dreadlocked while you're there. 155 00:07:25,676 --> 00:07:28,678 Gossip girl's hardly a war buff, but I did cram 156 00:07:28,679 --> 00:07:30,950 for a quiz or two on the American revolution. 157 00:07:30,951 --> 00:07:35,154 The last time new haven was invaded was in 1779. 158 00:07:35,155 --> 00:07:36,986 Hey, mom. Change of plans. 159 00:07:36,987 --> 00:07:39,589 Tell the driver we're going to Yale. 160 00:07:39,590 --> 00:07:41,591 Heads up, b. 161 00:07:41,592 --> 00:07:43,964 There's a cannonball coming your way. 162 00:07:56,507 --> 00:07:59,509 Oh, after that shower, there won't be any hot water left 163 00:07:59,510 --> 00:08:02,882 in the building. I wasn't in the shower the whole time. 164 00:08:02,883 --> 00:08:05,815 I was waiting for something. I got here as fast as I could. 165 00:08:05,816 --> 00:08:08,958 I know. I, uh, saw you running up the block from my window. What's going on here? 166 00:08:08,959 --> 00:08:13,092 Did you know that Vanessa's applying for N.Y.U. Next fall? Something you wouldn't be able to do 167 00:08:13,093 --> 00:08:16,165 without finishing high school. Which she's doing by homeschooling. 168 00:08:16,166 --> 00:08:19,999 Which she has to do because she has to work to support herself. 169 00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:23,272 Living as an adult when you're a teenager 170 00:08:23,273 --> 00:08:26,075 is not something any parent wants for their child. Well, what about what I want for me? 171 00:08:26,076 --> 00:08:32,011 Well, until you're 18, 172 00:08:32,012 --> 00:08:34,213 come to the atelier with me today. 173 00:08:34,214 --> 00:08:37,617 Come with you? I'll make you a deal. Spend the day with me, 174 00:08:37,618 --> 00:08:40,850 and by the end of the day, if you honestly think 175 00:08:40,851 --> 00:08:43,993 that I should go back to constance on Monday, I will. Jenny, I've seen all your designs, 176 00:08:43,994 --> 00:08:46,996 heard about your internship all summer long. 177 00:08:46,997 --> 00:08:50,830 What more is there? Well, things are different now. 178 00:08:50,831 --> 00:08:54,533 Well, at least we'll be moving forward in one way or another. 179 00:08:54,534 --> 00:08:57,006 It's a deal. You mean it? 180 00:08:57,007 --> 00:08:59,839 You have my word. (Squeals) Thank you! 181 00:08:59,840 --> 00:09:03,112 We hear there's nothing like Yale in October... 182 00:09:03,113 --> 00:09:05,575 The crisp air, the turning leaves, 183 00:09:05,576 --> 00:09:07,847 the invasion of prospective freshmen. 184 00:09:07,848 --> 00:09:10,019 Better hurry up, lonely boy. 185 00:09:10,020 --> 00:09:12,752 Your future's waiting. 186 00:09:12,753 --> 00:09:16,025 To summarize, I-I really feel that I have something to say. 187 00:09:16,026 --> 00:09:18,187 Well, by all means, say it. Via my writing. 188 00:09:18,188 --> 00:09:20,559 Uh, with... with its world-class english department, 189 00:09:20,560 --> 00:09:23,562 Yale would be the ideal place for me to grow 190 00:09:23,563 --> 00:09:25,995 as a... as a writer, to... to flourish 191 00:09:25,996 --> 00:09:27,867 and, uh, thrive. 192 00:09:27,868 --> 00:09:30,740 Kudos to you and your inner thesaurus, Mr. Humphrey, 193 00:09:30,741 --> 00:09:32,742 but there's a problem with your application. 194 00:09:32,743 --> 00:09:35,805 A-a-a PR... no, there's um, I double... I triple-checked it. 195 00:09:35,806 --> 00:09:37,747 It seems you only have one letter of recommendation 196 00:09:37,748 --> 00:09:39,609 from j.L. Hall. 197 00:09:39,610 --> 00:09:42,251 Noah shapiro declined to write on your behalf. 198 00:09:42,252 --> 00:09:44,113 Um, Mr. Shapiro and I had creative differences, 199 00:09:44,114 --> 00:09:47,016 but... but if you look further down my application, 200 00:09:47,017 --> 00:09:49,018 you'll see that I spent the summer 201 00:09:49,019 --> 00:09:52,061 interning with Jeremiah Harris. A fact which Mr. Harris 202 00:09:52,062 --> 00:09:54,724 has not been able to confirm himself. 203 00:09:54,725 --> 00:09:57,727 Oh, um, did you... did you call him early in the morning? 204 00:09:57,728 --> 00:10:00,630 'Cause he's not... He's not a-a morning person. 205 00:10:00,631 --> 00:10:06,776 I mean, he's not an afternoon person either. 206 00:10:06,777 --> 00:10:09,939 You need another letter, one about your work. 207 00:10:09,940 --> 00:10:13,182 Another letter from whom and how? 208 00:10:13,183 --> 00:10:14,784 This is Yale. 209 00:10:14,785 --> 00:10:16,215 If you haven't noticed, 210 00:10:16,216 --> 00:10:18,347 we traffic in brick buildings full of professors. 211 00:10:18,348 --> 00:10:21,050 I suggest you put on your walking shoes, 212 00:10:21,051 --> 00:10:23,052 head to the english department 213 00:10:23,053 --> 00:10:25,795 and find someone to read your work. 214 00:10:25,796 --> 00:10:27,927 I thought we were gonna do something. 215 00:10:27,928 --> 00:10:30,099 What happened to your master plan, 216 00:10:30,100 --> 00:10:33,232 finding the skull and bones? 217 00:10:33,233 --> 00:10:35,364 You don't find them. 218 00:10:35,365 --> 00:10:36,966 They find you. 219 00:10:36,967 --> 00:10:38,367 Hmm. That's good. 220 00:10:38,368 --> 00:10:41,140 So we'll just sit here and wait. 221 00:10:41,141 --> 00:10:43,713 I mean, there's a football game at 1:00 222 00:10:43,714 --> 00:10:46,976 or a tour of the university art gallery at 3:00. 223 00:10:46,977 --> 00:10:51,420 (The friendly fires' "white diamonds" playing) 224 00:10:51,421 --> 00:10:52,723 Whoa. 225 00:11:00,030 --> 00:11:03,733 Good luck sitting on your ass. 226 00:11:03,734 --> 00:11:07,266 Hey. Excuse me. Can I ask you a question? 227 00:11:07,267 --> 00:11:11,701 ♫ Along came love, she had yearned for so long ♫ 228 00:11:11,702 --> 00:11:15,004 ♫ oh, she felt on fire ♫ 229 00:11:15,005 --> 00:11:18,148 What the hell? (Man) Come on, get him! (Grunts) 230 00:11:22,853 --> 00:11:25,185 (Dean laughs in distance) 231 00:11:29,389 --> 00:11:32,091 (Laughs) 232 00:11:32,092 --> 00:11:34,463 (Woman) Oh, my. The Dean hasn't laughed like that in years. 233 00:11:34,464 --> 00:11:36,695 It was an utter delight to meet you, miss Van Der Woodsen. 234 00:11:36,696 --> 00:11:40,069 What a lovely surprise. Oh, and who doesn't like a surprise? 235 00:11:40,070 --> 00:11:43,302 I do hope you enjoy the rest of your visit. 236 00:11:43,303 --> 00:11:45,975 Thank you so much. (Laughs) Looks like he's ready for you. 237 00:11:45,976 --> 00:11:48,879 Shall we, miss Waldorf? 238 00:11:51,341 --> 00:11:55,816 I've never been more prepared. 239 00:12:03,453 --> 00:12:06,255 So whatever major you decide on, you can mix up with electives. 240 00:12:06,256 --> 00:12:08,727 Yale's are better than most. Oh, really? 241 00:12:08,728 --> 00:12:10,830 Mm-hmm. Well, what's your favorite? 242 00:12:10,831 --> 00:12:13,302 It's a toss-up between the role of sex in art 243 00:12:13,303 --> 00:12:15,264 and great hoaxes in archaeology. 244 00:12:15,265 --> 00:12:17,867 Those are seriously classes? Mm-hmm. (Laughs) 245 00:12:17,868 --> 00:12:19,939 What school are you here from? 246 00:12:19,940 --> 00:12:21,841 St. Jude's in New York. 247 00:12:21,842 --> 00:12:24,844 St. Jude's? Then you must know, uh, Nate Archibald. 248 00:12:24,845 --> 00:12:27,847 I heard he's on campus this weekend. Why does that name sound familiar? 249 00:12:27,848 --> 00:12:29,849 He's the son of Howard "the captain" Archibald. 250 00:12:29,850 --> 00:12:32,852 We've been talking about him in econ. 251 00:12:32,853 --> 00:12:35,424 The guy's like a modern milken. Oh. 252 00:12:35,425 --> 00:12:38,287 Hey, uh, Jordan, do you want to show me around campus? 253 00:12:38,288 --> 00:12:42,061 I'd love to see it. Sure, but before I go anywhere with a stranger, 254 00:12:42,062 --> 00:12:44,293 I think maybe you should tell me your name. 255 00:12:44,294 --> 00:12:48,537 Oh, my name, of course, um, is Dan. 256 00:12:48,538 --> 00:12:50,239 Dan Humphrey. 257 00:12:50,240 --> 00:12:52,172 All right. 258 00:12:54,474 --> 00:12:57,246 Chuck bass, heir to bass industries, 259 00:12:57,247 --> 00:12:59,809 champion of the legendary lost weekend. 260 00:12:59,810 --> 00:13:02,511 Rumor has it you've slept with more "Maxim" covers 261 00:13:02,512 --> 00:13:04,453 than John Mayer. And better, I might add. 262 00:13:04,454 --> 00:13:06,455 (All laugh) If our intel's correct, you're our prime candidate 263 00:13:06,456 --> 00:13:09,859 from next year's class, but we don't take anything on hearsay. 264 00:13:09,860 --> 00:13:12,221 We need to know firsthand 265 00:13:12,222 --> 00:13:14,824 if you're as good as your advertising. 266 00:13:14,825 --> 00:13:17,927 Well, I come prepared. 267 00:13:17,928 --> 00:13:20,970 How about a little private party to kick things off? 268 00:13:20,971 --> 00:13:23,473 What do you have in mind? 269 00:13:25,505 --> 00:13:27,336 I have to say, 270 00:13:27,337 --> 00:13:30,309 your application is most impressive, miss Waldorf. 271 00:13:30,310 --> 00:13:33,382 There's just one thing I'd like to know. 272 00:13:33,383 --> 00:13:37,146 Tell me something about you that isn't in that packet. 273 00:13:37,147 --> 00:13:40,089 Oh. Not in there? 274 00:13:40,090 --> 00:13:42,191 Do you like to drive race cars? 275 00:13:42,192 --> 00:13:44,393 Can you cook authentic szechuan? 276 00:13:44,394 --> 00:13:49,358 The young lady before you told me a delightful story. 277 00:13:49,359 --> 00:13:54,334 She was recently in a fashion show just for fun. 278 00:13:56,266 --> 00:13:59,939 I know I must seem rather traditional 279 00:13:59,940 --> 00:14:01,941 compared to that young lady, 280 00:14:01,942 --> 00:14:04,613 but isn't tradition what Yale is all about? 281 00:14:04,614 --> 00:14:08,847 Well, yes, but we've been trying to change that image. 282 00:14:08,848 --> 00:14:10,319 Too stuffy. 283 00:14:10,320 --> 00:14:12,251 So? 284 00:14:12,252 --> 00:14:15,985 Well... 285 00:14:15,986 --> 00:14:19,458 I'm aware I lack some people's 286 00:14:19,459 --> 00:14:21,060 easy grace with strangers, 287 00:14:21,061 --> 00:14:23,432 and I don't exactly make you feel 288 00:14:23,433 --> 00:14:27,036 like you've known me forever even though we just met. 289 00:14:27,037 --> 00:14:28,938 When I laugh, 290 00:14:28,939 --> 00:14:32,101 you might not smile just at the coquettish sound of it. 291 00:14:32,102 --> 00:14:34,473 And I may not be "spontaneous" 292 00:14:34,474 --> 00:14:36,605 or "delightful" or "full of surprises," 293 00:14:36,606 --> 00:14:39,409 and my hair might not sparkle when it catches the light... 294 00:14:41,281 --> 00:14:47,516 Everything worth knowing about me is in that folder. 295 00:14:47,517 --> 00:14:49,419 I made sure of it. 296 00:14:51,121 --> 00:14:55,224 (Door opens) Well, isn't there anything else you'd like to ask me? 297 00:14:55,225 --> 00:14:57,226 Maybe about what my plans are for tonight? 298 00:14:57,227 --> 00:14:59,228 Uh, there's so much to do on campus. 299 00:14:59,229 --> 00:15:01,300 I'm sure you'll find something. 300 00:15:01,301 --> 00:15:05,075 It was so nice to meet you. 301 00:15:09,509 --> 00:15:11,110 Right. 302 00:15:11,111 --> 00:15:13,642 Uh, good luck then. 303 00:15:13,643 --> 00:15:15,384 (Door shuts) 304 00:15:15,385 --> 00:15:16,986 (Whispers) Oh, god. 305 00:15:16,987 --> 00:15:18,387 (Serena) Great hoaxes in archaeology... 306 00:15:18,388 --> 00:15:20,319 Is that even a class? 307 00:15:20,320 --> 00:15:22,491 What are you doing, Serena? 308 00:15:22,492 --> 00:15:24,093 Oh, these lovely people 309 00:15:24,094 --> 00:15:26,295 were just showing me the course catalog. 310 00:15:26,296 --> 00:15:29,398 No, here. Yale. Yale is mine. 311 00:15:29,399 --> 00:15:32,401 Well, I'll admit, I came to punish you 312 00:15:32,402 --> 00:15:34,403 for the things you said to me this morning. 313 00:15:34,404 --> 00:15:37,136 Fine. Consider me punished. You can go home now. 314 00:15:37,137 --> 00:15:39,638 I actually like it here. 315 00:15:39,639 --> 00:15:43,012 The campus is beautiful, the people are so nice, 316 00:15:43,013 --> 00:15:47,476 and do you know how great the drama school is? Of course I do. It's world-renowned. 317 00:15:47,477 --> 00:15:51,020 The Dean made me realize that by being so set on brown, 318 00:15:51,021 --> 00:15:53,322 I closed myself off to all other options. 319 00:15:53,323 --> 00:15:55,284 Well, that's a lovely epiphany. 320 00:15:55,285 --> 00:15:59,989 I'm afraid it's irrelevant. 321 00:15:59,990 --> 00:16:03,292 Hello? 322 00:16:03,293 --> 00:16:06,095 An intimate gathering at the Dean's house tonight? 323 00:16:06,096 --> 00:16:08,037 I'd be honored. 324 00:16:08,038 --> 00:16:10,169 Thank you. 325 00:16:10,170 --> 00:16:13,042 You were invited to my gathering. 326 00:16:13,043 --> 00:16:15,044 You might want to make other plans. 327 00:16:15,045 --> 00:16:18,577 She said I was her last call. 328 00:16:18,578 --> 00:16:20,210 (Sighs) 329 00:16:22,112 --> 00:16:24,583 Of all the things... 330 00:16:24,584 --> 00:16:26,215 Nate... 331 00:16:26,216 --> 00:16:28,057 My mom... 332 00:16:28,058 --> 00:16:29,558 The girls at school... 333 00:16:29,559 --> 00:16:31,491 You wouldn't take this from me... 334 00:16:35,165 --> 00:16:38,727 Because if you do, I swear I will take you down. 335 00:16:38,728 --> 00:16:41,700 I'm not taking anything from you, Blair. I was invited. 336 00:16:41,701 --> 00:16:45,574 And as for taking me down, I'd love to see you try. 337 00:16:45,575 --> 00:16:48,077 When it comes to war, 338 00:16:48,078 --> 00:16:50,479 the rule is never retreat, never surrender. 339 00:16:50,480 --> 00:16:53,483 But whoever said that never met the new Serena. 340 00:17:02,292 --> 00:17:04,753 Spotted... little Jenny Humphrey 341 00:17:04,754 --> 00:17:06,495 off her high horse 342 00:17:06,496 --> 00:17:08,427 and in high demand. 343 00:17:08,428 --> 00:17:11,029 Did you look at the resort samples? 344 00:17:11,030 --> 00:17:14,032 Eleanor wants your opinion. Oh, no, I didn't, but I'll do that right now. 345 00:17:14,033 --> 00:17:16,205 And we got in the chambray you like. 346 00:17:16,206 --> 00:17:19,209 We need your advice on what patterns they go with. 347 00:17:21,811 --> 00:17:25,614 I didn't realize it was bring your father to work day. Yes, well, it was Jenny's idea 348 00:17:25,615 --> 00:17:28,777 to show me why this is so important to her. Uh-huh. 349 00:17:28,778 --> 00:17:31,220 Do you have a moment? Just. 350 00:17:31,221 --> 00:17:34,253 I gave Jenny my word about something this morning, 351 00:17:34,254 --> 00:17:39,057 but I'm not sure if I can keep it. I need your help. What can I do for you? 352 00:17:39,058 --> 00:17:41,059 Fire her. 353 00:17:41,060 --> 00:17:43,192 (Laughs) I will do no such thing. 354 00:17:43,193 --> 00:17:45,194 Fashion is a young person's career, 355 00:17:45,195 --> 00:17:47,636 and this is Jenny's moment. She's only 15 years old. 356 00:17:47,637 --> 00:17:50,099 The opportunity can wait till she's ready. 357 00:17:50,100 --> 00:17:52,141 Do you remember the dreams you had 358 00:17:52,142 --> 00:17:54,343 when you were 15, Mr. Humphrey? 359 00:17:54,344 --> 00:17:56,505 What if they all started to come true? 360 00:17:56,506 --> 00:18:00,679 Would you have told them to wait? 361 00:18:00,680 --> 00:18:03,112 Just make sure they're up for anything. 362 00:18:03,113 --> 00:18:05,084 This crowd can get particular. 363 00:18:08,718 --> 00:18:10,859 Well, I know you're not a geography whiz, 364 00:18:10,860 --> 00:18:13,522 but you aware that Providence is in Rhode Island? I don't have time to explain. 365 00:18:13,523 --> 00:18:16,325 I've been invited to the Dean's house tonight. 366 00:18:16,326 --> 00:18:18,867 I have to get ready. The Dean's house? 367 00:18:18,868 --> 00:18:21,770 Uh-huh. Nice. What's your answer to his question? 368 00:18:21,771 --> 00:18:24,833 Yes? No, no, no. "What person, real or imagined, living or dead, 369 00:18:24,834 --> 00:18:26,835 would you most like to have dinner with?" 370 00:18:26,836 --> 00:18:29,808 The rumor is, if your answer impresses the Dean enough, 371 00:18:29,809 --> 00:18:33,242 it gets you on the short list for early admission, 372 00:18:33,243 --> 00:18:36,815 or so says Blair. Oh, I should have given my spot to her. 373 00:18:36,816 --> 00:18:39,688 You got invited, and she didn't? 374 00:18:39,689 --> 00:18:42,291 You're lucky to be alive. 375 00:18:42,292 --> 00:18:44,122 Yeah, well, I won't be much longer 376 00:18:44,123 --> 00:18:47,326 if I don't find an answer fast. Steal Blair's. 377 00:18:47,327 --> 00:18:50,599 She has no use for it anymore. No. No, I can't, no matter how good it is. 378 00:18:50,600 --> 00:18:55,304 George sand. I did not want to know that. And how do you even know that? 379 00:18:55,305 --> 00:18:57,536 Wait. Why does Blair want to go to dinner 380 00:18:57,537 --> 00:19:00,509 with some guy named George? A hot girl named George. She dressed like a man 381 00:19:00,510 --> 00:19:03,512 and apparently is the Dean's favorite writer. 382 00:19:03,513 --> 00:19:05,814 And I know this because talking with Blair 383 00:19:05,815 --> 00:19:08,347 about how she's going to get into Yale gets her really... 384 00:19:08,348 --> 00:19:11,820 Chuck, no. You just told me two things I never wanted to hear, 385 00:19:11,821 --> 00:19:14,853 and one is gonna haunt me for the rest of my life. 386 00:19:14,854 --> 00:19:18,627 (The Duke spirit's "wooden heart" playing) 387 00:19:18,628 --> 00:19:22,631 ♫ no one wastes time quite like I do ♫ 388 00:19:22,632 --> 00:19:26,265 Okay, before we go any further... 389 00:19:26,266 --> 00:19:30,669 Mm-hmm? 390 00:19:30,670 --> 00:19:33,772 As a writer, what do you think of márquez? 391 00:19:33,773 --> 00:19:34,704 Márquez... 392 00:19:34,705 --> 00:19:38,407 Um, that's a tough one. 393 00:19:38,408 --> 00:19:40,379 Okay, you're right. It's too broad. 394 00:19:40,380 --> 00:19:43,482 Let's just talk "cholera." 395 00:19:43,483 --> 00:19:45,784 Oh. Uh... 396 00:19:45,785 --> 00:19:47,586 Very painful. 397 00:19:47,587 --> 00:19:49,588 Um, no, I'm not kidding. 398 00:19:49,589 --> 00:19:52,591 I tried to read it, and I couldn't get through it. 399 00:19:52,592 --> 00:19:54,793 It's ridiculous. You're funny... 400 00:19:54,794 --> 00:19:56,665 (Laughs) 401 00:19:56,666 --> 00:19:58,567 And sweet. 402 00:19:58,568 --> 00:20:00,530 Not like most writers I meet. 403 00:20:02,802 --> 00:20:04,273 Hello? 404 00:20:04,274 --> 00:20:07,436 ♫ ...Your heart ♫ 405 00:20:07,437 --> 00:20:09,708 Hi. Jordan Steele? 406 00:20:09,709 --> 00:20:12,581 Do I know you? No, I was told by the other t.A.S 407 00:20:12,582 --> 00:20:16,415 that you work for the chair of the lit department. Yeah. Um, can you come back later, maybe? 408 00:20:16,416 --> 00:20:18,947 I apologize for hunting you down now, but I'm... I'm desperate. 409 00:20:18,948 --> 00:20:21,320 I need someone to read my work and write a letter 410 00:20:21,321 --> 00:20:22,951 before the weekend's out, 411 00:20:22,952 --> 00:20:26,355 and I-I was, uh, I was hoping you could help me. 412 00:20:26,356 --> 00:20:28,457 Nate? Um, help you what? 413 00:20:28,458 --> 00:20:29,958 Th-that's, uh, that's Nate Archibald. 414 00:20:29,959 --> 00:20:31,360 (Mouths words) 415 00:20:31,361 --> 00:20:34,564 No, that's Dan Humphrey. 416 00:20:36,306 --> 00:20:37,807 N... what? 417 00:20:41,511 --> 00:20:42,971 Nate Archibald. 418 00:20:42,972 --> 00:20:44,813 Dan Humphrey. 419 00:20:44,814 --> 00:20:47,576 No, she was really into me, and next thing I know, 420 00:20:47,577 --> 00:20:51,320 she's throwing a book at my head. Yeah, faulkner. It looked like a first edition, 421 00:20:51,321 --> 00:20:53,752 not that you'd know. No, what I do know is that you didn't have to mess it up for me 422 00:20:53,753 --> 00:20:56,755 right then and there. Well, what should I have done, watch you continue to screw up 423 00:20:56,756 --> 00:20:59,257 my last chance at making a connection 424 00:20:59,258 --> 00:21:01,990 in the lit department for pseudonymous sex? No, that's not why I did it. 425 00:21:01,991 --> 00:21:04,893 Is it funny for you? Because my future's not a joke. It's not. Just let me explain, okay? 426 00:21:04,894 --> 00:21:07,866 Look, Nate, I'm sure that your life is complicated 427 00:21:07,867 --> 00:21:10,839 with... with your family and, um, I don't know, girls, 428 00:21:10,840 --> 00:21:13,302 but you can't pretend to be me. 429 00:21:13,303 --> 00:21:15,304 Maybe it's okay to use people like that in your world, 430 00:21:15,305 --> 00:21:17,746 but it's not in mine. Do ever get tired of carrying around 431 00:21:17,747 --> 00:21:20,810 that chip on your shoulder, Dan? No wonder Serena dumped you. 432 00:21:24,554 --> 00:21:26,785 Hello, Shirley. I would like an invitation 433 00:21:26,786 --> 00:21:28,717 to the private reception at the Dean's house tonight, 434 00:21:28,718 --> 00:21:30,989 and you're going to get me one. 435 00:21:30,990 --> 00:21:33,892 I'm sorry. I'm not in charge of the Dean's private affairs. 436 00:21:33,893 --> 00:21:36,024 I have it on good authority that you are, 437 00:21:36,025 --> 00:21:38,827 and I need to get back in the good graces of the Dean. 438 00:21:38,828 --> 00:21:41,900 Interviews are so stressful for you students. Check your e-mail. 439 00:21:41,901 --> 00:21:46,335 (Clicks mouse) 440 00:21:46,336 --> 00:21:47,507 (Gasps) 441 00:21:50,810 --> 00:21:52,341 18th century. 442 00:21:52,342 --> 00:21:55,644 Do you know how rare a pair is from that era? 443 00:21:55,645 --> 00:21:57,846 I had someone at christie's put them on hold 444 00:21:57,847 --> 00:21:59,749 just in case. 445 00:22:03,022 --> 00:22:06,054 1100 hillhouse Avenue. 446 00:22:06,055 --> 00:22:08,927 Poor s. She should know b.'S rules by now. 447 00:22:08,928 --> 00:22:10,929 When someone leaves you off the list, 448 00:22:10,930 --> 00:22:13,803 don't get mad. Get in. Thank you. 449 00:22:17,637 --> 00:22:20,439 Well? 450 00:22:20,440 --> 00:22:22,340 I'm impressed. 451 00:22:22,341 --> 00:22:24,743 You're clearly valued here. 452 00:22:24,744 --> 00:22:26,745 You handle yourself very professionally. 453 00:22:26,746 --> 00:22:28,346 Thank you. 454 00:22:28,347 --> 00:22:31,380 But... I think you should go back to school. 455 00:22:31,381 --> 00:22:36,084 But you just said you were impressed. 456 00:22:36,085 --> 00:22:37,656 I don't... 457 00:22:37,657 --> 00:22:39,087 I don't understand. 458 00:22:39,088 --> 00:22:42,461 I'm sorry, sweetheart. 459 00:22:42,462 --> 00:22:44,534 I just think school's too important. 460 00:22:50,870 --> 00:22:52,541 Okay. 461 00:22:52,542 --> 00:22:54,903 If that's what you think, that's what you think. 462 00:22:54,904 --> 00:22:58,046 We made a deal, and I agreed to it, so... 463 00:22:58,047 --> 00:23:01,009 I have to say, I thought there'd be some yelling. 464 00:23:01,010 --> 00:23:06,014 You said you'd give me a day, and you did. 465 00:23:06,015 --> 00:23:09,157 Can, um, can you at least take me 466 00:23:09,158 --> 00:23:12,921 to complete one last errand before we go home? Sure. 467 00:23:12,922 --> 00:23:14,464 Thanks. 468 00:23:16,996 --> 00:23:19,768 (Indistinct conversations) 469 00:23:19,769 --> 00:23:22,872 (The section quarter playing muse's "time is running out") 470 00:23:30,480 --> 00:23:33,642 Trying to come up with an answer for the Dean's parlor game? 471 00:23:33,643 --> 00:23:36,685 You manipulated your way in here? 472 00:23:36,686 --> 00:23:39,848 I get what I want, Serena, just like I'm gonna win tonight. 473 00:23:39,849 --> 00:23:41,450 What's your answer? 474 00:23:41,451 --> 00:23:43,952 Oh, no, let me guess. 475 00:23:43,953 --> 00:23:45,594 Lauren Conrad. 476 00:23:45,595 --> 00:23:47,797 Try George sand. 477 00:23:50,530 --> 00:23:53,001 Wait. That's... Your answer? Not anymore. 478 00:23:53,002 --> 00:23:56,204 If you're gonna cheat your way in, then why should I play fair? 479 00:23:56,205 --> 00:23:58,937 Oh, and I heard that the Dean asks his question 480 00:23:58,938 --> 00:24:01,840 in alphabetical order, so since "v" comes before "w," 481 00:24:01,841 --> 00:24:04,473 it looks like the answer is all mine. 482 00:24:04,474 --> 00:24:07,577 ♫♫ 483 00:24:09,148 --> 00:24:10,820 How kind of you. 484 00:24:12,682 --> 00:24:15,655 ♫♫ 485 00:24:21,691 --> 00:24:24,192 You gentlemen wanted a Chuck bass party. 486 00:24:24,193 --> 00:24:26,795 Your party has arrived, straight from... 487 00:24:26,796 --> 00:24:28,937 I can't tell you where they're from actually, 488 00:24:28,938 --> 00:24:31,940 but they're the best money can buy. 489 00:24:31,941 --> 00:24:33,942 Before you ask, they don't speak english, 490 00:24:33,943 --> 00:24:35,674 and they don't care. 491 00:24:35,675 --> 00:24:39,207 By the way, that's not one for each of you. 492 00:24:39,208 --> 00:24:43,151 They do their best work in threes. (Men chuckle) 493 00:24:43,152 --> 00:24:47,055 Not bad, bass, but you're not done. 494 00:24:47,056 --> 00:24:51,960 The girls are all right, but they're just girls. 495 00:24:51,961 --> 00:24:54,763 You still need to prove your loyalty. 496 00:24:54,764 --> 00:24:56,695 We want Nate Archibald. 497 00:24:56,696 --> 00:24:59,968 We know you're tight with him. We know he's on campus. 498 00:24:59,969 --> 00:25:02,931 Archibald's not worth your time. We think he is. 499 00:25:02,932 --> 00:25:05,804 My family lost our compound in Newport 500 00:25:05,805 --> 00:25:08,006 because of his father. Pull him in. Take him down. 501 00:25:08,007 --> 00:25:10,579 You've got one hour. 502 00:25:10,580 --> 00:25:14,013 If you want in, you'll bring us Archibald. 503 00:25:15,985 --> 00:25:18,817 Aiment-vous les films du lelouch? Oh, j'adore lelouch. 504 00:25:18,818 --> 00:25:22,751 "Roman de gare" était un de mes films préférés cet année. 505 00:25:22,752 --> 00:25:27,125 Et toi? 506 00:25:27,126 --> 00:25:30,298 I'm sure that's why you don't know it very well. 507 00:25:30,299 --> 00:25:31,960 Blair Waldorf. Enchanté, mademoiselle. 508 00:25:31,961 --> 00:25:34,262 You were my father's favorite teacher. 509 00:25:34,263 --> 00:25:36,765 (Speaking French) I've been looking for you. 510 00:25:36,766 --> 00:25:38,306 You inspired his expatriation to France. 511 00:25:38,307 --> 00:25:41,611 I'd love for you to hear about it. Shall we? Oh, oui. 512 00:25:44,013 --> 00:25:46,645 (Cell phone rings) Where have you been? 513 00:25:46,646 --> 00:25:49,678 I got tied up. Hey, look. You wouldn't want to leave tonight, would you? 514 00:25:49,679 --> 00:25:52,581 I mean, I think I am completely done with this place. 515 00:25:52,582 --> 00:25:55,153 Did you strike out? More like abruptly thrown out. 516 00:25:55,154 --> 00:25:58,827 People here know who I am. They know all the stuff about my dad. 517 00:25:58,828 --> 00:26:02,290 Plus, there was this whole thing with Dan Humphrey. Well, I'd love to say, "tell me all about it" and mean it, 518 00:26:02,291 --> 00:26:06,635 but since I can't, why don't we just meet up and get blazed? Yeah, yeah, okay. 519 00:26:06,636 --> 00:26:09,267 Hey, look. There's this place off campus called Mike's bar. 520 00:26:09,268 --> 00:26:11,069 I'll meet you there. 521 00:26:11,070 --> 00:26:12,240 Stay put. 522 00:26:12,241 --> 00:26:14,203 Perfect. 523 00:26:17,106 --> 00:26:20,649 It's done. Let's go. 524 00:26:20,650 --> 00:26:24,012 Although I love Henry viii, I prefer sir Thomas more. 525 00:26:24,013 --> 00:26:25,614 I think it's great 526 00:26:25,615 --> 00:26:27,656 that pope Benedict canonized him when he did. 527 00:26:27,657 --> 00:26:29,658 Oh, thank you. Don't you mean pope pius xi? 528 00:26:29,659 --> 00:26:31,760 That's quite right, miss, uh... Van Der Woodsen. 529 00:26:31,761 --> 00:26:36,625 Van Der Woodsen, is it? Hi. 530 00:26:36,626 --> 00:26:38,326 Excuse me. (Man) Can I borrow you for a minute? 531 00:26:38,327 --> 00:26:40,598 How do you even know that? 532 00:26:40,599 --> 00:26:42,671 You slept through history class last year. 533 00:26:42,672 --> 00:26:45,704 I love "the tudors." Henry cavill is a total babe. 534 00:26:45,705 --> 00:26:47,375 You look pretty calm for someone 535 00:26:47,376 --> 00:26:50,979 who no longer has the perfect answer to the Dean's question. 536 00:26:50,980 --> 00:26:53,381 You don't think I came all the way here 537 00:26:53,382 --> 00:26:55,613 without a backup answer, do you? 538 00:26:55,614 --> 00:26:58,346 Oh, and it's a real crowd-pleaser. It's gonna kill. 539 00:26:58,347 --> 00:27:02,020 (Taps glass) Everyone. Everyone. 540 00:27:02,021 --> 00:27:05,023 It's time for my favorite part of the evening, 541 00:27:05,024 --> 00:27:08,096 which has delightfully become known over the years 542 00:27:08,097 --> 00:27:09,829 as probatur. 543 00:27:21,971 --> 00:27:25,413 Whoa. Hey. Hey! Whoa! 544 00:27:25,414 --> 00:27:27,816 (Muffled) Hey! Aah! 545 00:27:27,817 --> 00:27:31,349 Hey! Aah! 546 00:27:31,350 --> 00:27:34,723 And now on to miss... Steinberg. 547 00:27:34,724 --> 00:27:37,255 Your answer is Artemis. 548 00:27:37,256 --> 00:27:40,428 Artemis is the goddess of the forests and the hills. 549 00:27:40,429 --> 00:27:43,391 As a freegan, I believe in all living things 550 00:27:43,392 --> 00:27:45,163 being equal to all people. 551 00:27:45,164 --> 00:27:47,696 (Lowered voice) I'm so glad they did this alphabetically, 552 00:27:47,697 --> 00:27:50,668 'cause now I get to see the look on your face 553 00:27:50,669 --> 00:27:53,671 when I use your answer even sooner. (Lowered voice) I can tell you right now, 554 00:27:53,672 --> 00:27:55,804 the look on my face will be of vindication. 555 00:27:55,805 --> 00:27:59,277 And also screw the man at the same time. 556 00:27:59,278 --> 00:28:02,410 Very nice, miss Steinberg. 557 00:28:02,411 --> 00:28:05,714 Uh, now on to miss Van Der Woodsen. 558 00:28:05,715 --> 00:28:08,717 The person you would most like to have dinner with, 559 00:28:08,718 --> 00:28:11,259 real or imagined, living or dead is... 560 00:28:11,260 --> 00:28:14,863 Pete fairman. 561 00:28:14,864 --> 00:28:16,124 Uh... 562 00:28:16,125 --> 00:28:18,126 I do not know this person. 563 00:28:18,127 --> 00:28:19,899 Who is Pete fairman? 564 00:28:22,471 --> 00:28:24,833 Um... 565 00:28:24,834 --> 00:28:26,074 He, uh, he... 566 00:28:26,075 --> 00:28:28,176 (Clears throat) He's... 567 00:28:28,177 --> 00:28:31,140 He's the man she killed. 568 00:28:40,319 --> 00:28:42,851 (Lowered voice) I cannot believe you did this. 569 00:28:42,852 --> 00:28:45,794 (Lowered voice) Why? It's not like you don't deserve it. 570 00:28:45,795 --> 00:28:48,426 Miss Van Der Woodsen, would you like to, uh, explain? 571 00:28:48,427 --> 00:28:50,398 (Normal voice) No, of course, Dean berube. 572 00:28:50,399 --> 00:28:52,761 Um, Pete fairman was a man that I knew. 573 00:28:52,762 --> 00:28:55,363 Man/dealer. Miss Waldorf, let her speak. 574 00:28:55,364 --> 00:28:58,206 He died almost two years ago when I was with him. 575 00:28:58,207 --> 00:29:00,208 What happened was a tragedy, 576 00:29:00,209 --> 00:29:02,370 and I am filled with regret over it, 577 00:29:02,371 --> 00:29:07,015 but I was not responsible... Were you responsible for the sex tape? 578 00:29:07,016 --> 00:29:10,418 Blair. It wasn't very sexy, if you ask me. 579 00:29:10,419 --> 00:29:13,321 Blair, that's enough. Let's go. Dean berube, do you mind 580 00:29:13,322 --> 00:29:16,885 if we, um, sort this out privately, please? Take all the time you need. 581 00:29:16,886 --> 00:29:21,329 My answer was George sand. Love her, idolize, worship! 582 00:29:21,330 --> 00:29:24,162 Get your hands off of me! Or are you trying to kill me, too? 583 00:29:24,163 --> 00:29:26,895 A guy died, and you use it as part of a game. 584 00:29:26,896 --> 00:29:28,897 Who does that? It isn't a game, 585 00:29:28,898 --> 00:29:31,970 and this isn't just another thing on a laundry list. 586 00:29:31,971 --> 00:29:34,973 This is Yale, my dream. You crossed the line. And so did you when you brought up Pete! 587 00:29:34,974 --> 00:29:38,047 As far as my being here, you take that up with the school. 588 00:29:43,182 --> 00:29:46,414 You did not just do that. Why did you think you were invited? 589 00:29:46,415 --> 00:29:48,416 You know on paper you're not Yale material. 590 00:29:48,417 --> 00:29:51,019 Could it be your face on "page six," 591 00:29:51,020 --> 00:29:53,261 your name everywhere? Face it, Serena. 592 00:29:53,262 --> 00:29:55,263 Yale needs to up their "q" rating, 593 00:29:55,264 --> 00:29:57,425 just like all the other schools, 594 00:29:57,426 --> 00:30:00,568 and they're gonna use girls like you to do it. You shut up! 595 00:30:00,569 --> 00:30:03,031 You shut up! Aah! No! 596 00:30:03,032 --> 00:30:04,973 (Grunts) Blair! 597 00:30:04,974 --> 00:30:08,306 And I really hate those stupid headbands. Aah! My headband! 598 00:30:08,307 --> 00:30:10,578 Aah! 599 00:30:10,579 --> 00:30:12,410 (Grunts) You... aah! 600 00:30:12,411 --> 00:30:14,242 No! You! 601 00:30:14,243 --> 00:30:16,345 Oh! Aah! 602 00:30:27,826 --> 00:30:29,899 (Elevator bell dings) 603 00:30:36,065 --> 00:30:39,067 Are you sure it's okay for us to just come up here like this? 604 00:30:39,068 --> 00:30:41,410 Yeah. The maid's expecting me. Larissa? 605 00:30:43,472 --> 00:30:45,473 Whose maid is Larissa exactly? 606 00:30:45,474 --> 00:30:47,876 You didn't say where we were going. 607 00:30:47,877 --> 00:30:49,177 Jenny. 608 00:30:49,178 --> 00:30:52,982 Lily's not here. I didn't think you'd mind. 609 00:30:54,884 --> 00:30:56,384 Rufus. 610 00:30:56,385 --> 00:30:59,087 Whoa. 611 00:30:59,088 --> 00:31:01,489 Oh, um... (Laughs) 612 00:31:01,490 --> 00:31:03,431 This is not my dress. 613 00:31:03,432 --> 00:31:07,095 I was just trying it on... For fun. 614 00:31:07,096 --> 00:31:09,097 Sorry. When I called, um, Larissa said 615 00:31:09,098 --> 00:31:12,370 you were going out tonight, and I could leave this with her. 616 00:31:12,371 --> 00:31:14,502 I forgot to include it in the garment bag 617 00:31:14,503 --> 00:31:16,374 with your dress. Oh. 618 00:31:16,375 --> 00:31:18,276 But clearly, um, 619 00:31:18,277 --> 00:31:20,108 I don't even think you need it. 620 00:31:20,109 --> 00:31:22,451 Uh, this dress looks so great on you. 621 00:31:25,654 --> 00:31:27,885 The only thing wrong is the shoes. 622 00:31:27,886 --> 00:31:30,959 I can totally go pick you out a different pair if you want. 623 00:31:30,960 --> 00:31:33,261 Oh, upstairs, third door on the left. 624 00:31:33,262 --> 00:31:35,494 Okay. 625 00:31:38,597 --> 00:31:40,028 How have you been? 626 00:31:40,029 --> 00:31:43,071 Fine. Sorry for the intrusion. 627 00:31:43,072 --> 00:31:46,434 Oh. It's no bother. I'm always happy to see you. 628 00:31:46,435 --> 00:31:50,078 Uh... The house seems quiet. 629 00:31:50,079 --> 00:31:52,080 Well, Bart is out of town, 630 00:31:52,081 --> 00:31:54,282 Serena and Charles are on college visits, 631 00:31:54,283 --> 00:31:57,545 and Eric has a new friend, so I hear. 632 00:31:57,546 --> 00:32:01,419 Well, the place looks amazing, as do you. 633 00:32:01,420 --> 00:32:03,021 It's quite a dress. 634 00:32:03,022 --> 00:32:05,493 Of course it is. Your daughter made it. 635 00:32:05,494 --> 00:32:08,026 You're so lucky 636 00:32:08,027 --> 00:32:11,029 to have a daughter that's this good at what she wants to do 637 00:32:11,030 --> 00:32:13,431 so early in her life. 638 00:32:13,432 --> 00:32:15,703 It's a gift. 639 00:32:15,704 --> 00:32:18,467 You had one, too, if I remember correctly. 640 00:32:24,273 --> 00:32:26,274 Here you go. The perfect pair of Jimmy choos. 641 00:32:26,275 --> 00:32:29,647 Mm. I will lend these to Serena when she wears the dress. Okay. 642 00:32:29,648 --> 00:32:32,620 Jenny, we should get going. Okay. See you. 643 00:32:32,621 --> 00:32:33,682 Bye. 644 00:32:36,225 --> 00:32:38,126 By the way, 645 00:32:38,127 --> 00:32:41,189 no matter what you wear, 646 00:32:41,190 --> 00:32:42,591 you look fantastic. 647 00:32:45,094 --> 00:32:49,197 (Elevator bell dings, doors open) 648 00:32:49,198 --> 00:32:53,071 Hey, man. Where are you? I've been sitting here forever. 649 00:32:53,072 --> 00:32:55,043 Please, just call me back. (Laughter) 650 00:32:55,044 --> 00:32:58,476 A round of shots, Mike. (Man) Coming right up, guys. 651 00:32:58,477 --> 00:33:00,978 We just taught Nate Archibald a lesson, 652 00:33:00,979 --> 00:33:03,581 and he'll never come back to Yale. Yeah, Archibald's such a loser. 653 00:33:03,582 --> 00:33:06,584 Excuse me. Did you say "Nate Archibald"? 654 00:33:06,585 --> 00:33:09,117 Yeah, we just tied that chump to the statue in the gazebo. 655 00:33:09,118 --> 00:33:12,420 It's priceless. I hope he freezes his ass off. 656 00:33:12,421 --> 00:33:14,422 Well, you got the wrong guy. 657 00:33:14,423 --> 00:33:16,424 I'm Nate Archibald, and I look forward 658 00:33:16,425 --> 00:33:19,067 to coming here next year and kicking your ass. 659 00:33:19,068 --> 00:33:22,030 In fact, why wait? (Woman screams) 660 00:33:22,031 --> 00:33:24,432 Okay, it can wait. (Man) Go! Get him! 661 00:33:24,433 --> 00:33:26,374 (Man) Come on! (Man speaks indistinctly) 662 00:33:26,375 --> 00:33:27,775 Get him! 663 00:33:27,776 --> 00:33:30,708 (Grunts) 664 00:33:30,709 --> 00:33:33,211 Hey, excuse me. Excuse me. Uh, hi. 665 00:33:33,212 --> 00:33:36,214 Um, I know this is a strange request, but could you untie me? 666 00:33:36,215 --> 00:33:38,616 Sir. Hey. Yeah. Hey. Come on. Hey. Excuse me. 667 00:33:38,617 --> 00:33:41,619 Would you be so kind as to, uh... 668 00:33:41,620 --> 00:33:43,552 Dan? 669 00:33:46,225 --> 00:33:49,227 I hope you at least bought the statue a drink first. 670 00:33:49,228 --> 00:33:51,399 No, you know, I don't know if I want you to help me. 671 00:33:51,400 --> 00:33:54,562 Well, you might, if you knew that the only reason you're here 672 00:33:54,563 --> 00:33:58,035 is because they thought you were me. How is that even possible? I-I didn't lie about my name. 673 00:33:58,036 --> 00:34:01,169 Yeah, but I have a feeling someone else did for you. 674 00:34:01,170 --> 00:34:05,113 Why would anyone want to hurt, uh, Mr. Perfect Nate Archibald? 675 00:34:05,114 --> 00:34:07,115 Apparently my legacy at Yale 676 00:34:07,116 --> 00:34:09,577 involves a lot of people hating my father's guts. 677 00:34:09,578 --> 00:34:13,281 It turns out he killed a few trust funds around here. 678 00:34:13,282 --> 00:34:16,454 By the way, this knot is ridiculous. Yeah, I know. 679 00:34:16,455 --> 00:34:18,456 Could you, uh, could you try a little faster? 680 00:34:18,457 --> 00:34:21,429 'Cause I see something approaching that looks female. 681 00:34:21,430 --> 00:34:24,462 I'm not entirely proud of my choice of boxers. 682 00:34:24,463 --> 00:34:26,595 You two again? 683 00:34:28,567 --> 00:34:30,738 Yeah. Hi. 684 00:34:30,739 --> 00:34:32,700 Is this performance art piece 685 00:34:32,701 --> 00:34:34,702 your new plan to get my attention? 686 00:34:34,703 --> 00:34:37,105 Uh, w-would... Would it work if it was? 687 00:34:37,106 --> 00:34:39,307 Move over. My mom was in the Navy. 688 00:34:39,308 --> 00:34:40,749 Oh, my god. 689 00:34:43,282 --> 00:34:44,812 (Sighs) 690 00:34:44,813 --> 00:34:47,455 I can't do it anymore, Blair. 691 00:34:47,456 --> 00:34:49,857 That's because you almost lost. 692 00:34:49,858 --> 00:34:52,860 I had you pinned with that chicken wing. Don't deny it. 693 00:34:52,861 --> 00:34:56,124 I don't mean this. I mean everything... 694 00:34:56,125 --> 00:35:01,229 The wars, the betrayal, 695 00:35:01,230 --> 00:35:02,770 it's exhausting. 696 00:35:02,771 --> 00:35:04,472 I'm sick of it, too. 697 00:35:04,473 --> 00:35:07,605 I'm sick of always looking like Darth Vader 698 00:35:07,606 --> 00:35:09,577 next to sunshine Barbie. 699 00:35:09,578 --> 00:35:11,679 Life's too short. 700 00:35:11,680 --> 00:35:14,412 You make it feel so long. 701 00:35:14,413 --> 00:35:16,544 Well, if that's how we really feel, 702 00:35:16,545 --> 00:35:20,818 may... maybe we shouldn't be friends. 703 00:35:20,819 --> 00:35:24,452 We were probably gonna grow apart in college anyway, 704 00:35:24,453 --> 00:35:27,596 so we might as well just start now, right? 705 00:35:29,328 --> 00:35:31,459 Fine by me. 706 00:35:31,460 --> 00:35:33,502 You live your life. I'll live mine. 707 00:35:35,334 --> 00:35:37,405 Sounds great. 708 00:35:37,406 --> 00:35:40,369 I agree. 709 00:35:48,146 --> 00:35:51,349 From comrades to combat, we thought we'd seen it all, 710 00:35:51,350 --> 00:35:54,151 but we've never seen this... 711 00:35:54,152 --> 00:35:56,153 Serena and Blair calling a cease-fire. 712 00:35:56,154 --> 00:36:00,158 After so much scorched earth, can either side claim victory? 713 00:36:08,437 --> 00:36:11,799 Why do I feel like you're gonna tell me the cat died? No, no. It's nothing bad. 714 00:36:11,800 --> 00:36:15,643 Uh, when I was your age, all I wanted was to be a musician, 715 00:36:15,644 --> 00:36:17,805 but my parents didn't think it was a good idea, 716 00:36:17,806 --> 00:36:20,808 and it made for some pretty uncomfortable years. 717 00:36:20,809 --> 00:36:23,781 And last night, I realized that... 718 00:36:23,782 --> 00:36:27,685 That we don't have to do things that way. I don't understand. 719 00:36:27,686 --> 00:36:32,420 Your dad asked me to bring over all my stuff on homeschooling. 720 00:36:32,421 --> 00:36:34,822 Aah! After Christmas, we can reevaluate. 721 00:36:34,823 --> 00:36:38,296 Aah! And if everything works out, maybe you'll apply 722 00:36:38,297 --> 00:36:41,729 to the professional children's school for next semester. Like Vera wang. Aah! 723 00:36:41,730 --> 00:36:44,832 Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Aw! 724 00:36:44,833 --> 00:36:47,536 I won't let you down. I promise. I know you won't. 725 00:36:54,613 --> 00:36:56,444 What are you doing here, 726 00:36:56,445 --> 00:36:59,717 making sure the Dean knows it's all my fault? 727 00:36:59,718 --> 00:37:02,590 No. I came to tell him that Yale is your dream, 728 00:37:02,591 --> 00:37:05,623 and you deserve to go here more than I do. 729 00:37:05,624 --> 00:37:07,725 What are you doing here? 730 00:37:07,726 --> 00:37:10,799 Doing the same thing for you. 731 00:37:12,631 --> 00:37:14,802 I was up all night thinking about 732 00:37:14,803 --> 00:37:16,964 the first time we came here together when we were 9. 733 00:37:16,965 --> 00:37:19,967 Your dad took us to that harvard/yale game, 734 00:37:19,968 --> 00:37:23,311 and you tackled senator schumer's daughter 735 00:37:23,312 --> 00:37:24,942 for wearing a Harvard sweatshirt. 736 00:37:24,943 --> 00:37:27,816 I bet those grass stains never came out. 737 00:37:30,679 --> 00:37:34,482 I don't want to not know you. 738 00:37:34,483 --> 00:37:36,023 I can't not know you. 739 00:37:36,024 --> 00:37:38,025 Maybe we just had that fight 740 00:37:38,026 --> 00:37:41,789 because the reality of being separated next year 741 00:37:41,790 --> 00:37:44,633 is just too scary to think about. 742 00:37:47,796 --> 00:37:48,897 So? 743 00:37:52,371 --> 00:37:54,342 Wait here for me. 744 00:37:54,343 --> 00:37:56,744 We'll ride home together. 745 00:37:56,745 --> 00:37:57,906 Okay. 746 00:38:01,610 --> 00:38:04,552 So you think you can, uh, maybe help him out a bit? 747 00:38:04,553 --> 00:38:09,557 Well, I can't promise anything, 748 00:38:09,558 --> 00:38:12,560 to read these and write you a recommendation. 749 00:38:12,561 --> 00:38:15,563 Yes. Thank you so much, really. It's so nice to know 750 00:38:15,564 --> 00:38:21,799 that my dream of going to Yale isn't dead. 751 00:38:21,800 --> 00:38:24,772 I just needed to be someone else for a while. 752 00:38:24,773 --> 00:38:26,774 Yeah, well, next time you're up here, 753 00:38:26,775 --> 00:38:29,036 why don't you just be yourself? Okay. 754 00:38:29,037 --> 00:38:30,609 Yeah. 755 00:38:31,980 --> 00:38:35,713 I would have liked you whatever your name was. 756 00:38:35,714 --> 00:38:37,044 Bye, Dan. 757 00:38:37,045 --> 00:38:41,048 Bye. You know what? 758 00:38:41,049 --> 00:38:43,952 That, uh, that thousand yard squint... can I steal that? Well, thank you. 759 00:38:46,455 --> 00:38:49,326 (Man) Here he is. 760 00:38:49,327 --> 00:38:52,400 It looks like someone messed up last night. 761 00:38:52,401 --> 00:38:55,833 You sent us after the wrong guy. He may have been the wrong guy for you, 762 00:38:55,834 --> 00:38:58,606 but he was the right guy for me. You'll pay for this when you get here next year. 763 00:38:58,607 --> 00:39:00,608 Oh, I'm not coming here next fall. 764 00:39:00,609 --> 00:39:03,611 Those girls I brought to the party last night? 765 00:39:03,612 --> 00:39:06,113 They witnessed some pretty incriminating acts 766 00:39:06,114 --> 00:39:08,546 with their lipstick cameras. 767 00:39:08,547 --> 00:39:11,549 You may be the future leaders of America. (Camera shutter snaps) 768 00:39:11,550 --> 00:39:15,022 You're now under the control of Chuck bass. I own you. (Camera shutter snaps) 769 00:39:15,023 --> 00:39:16,984 Keep it. 770 00:39:16,985 --> 00:39:19,388 I've got plenty. 771 00:39:27,095 --> 00:39:28,966 Missed you last night. 772 00:39:28,967 --> 00:39:30,838 Did you? 773 00:39:30,839 --> 00:39:34,402 Or was it your plan all along just to get me out of the way? 774 00:39:34,403 --> 00:39:36,805 What? I know what you did. 775 00:39:38,807 --> 00:39:41,849 You should be glad. Those guys were coming for you. 776 00:39:41,850 --> 00:39:44,712 I saved your ass. You didn't have to send them after Dan. 777 00:39:44,713 --> 00:39:46,884 Two birds, one stone. Seemed good to me. 778 00:39:46,885 --> 00:39:50,387 Besides, since when do you care about humdrum Humphrey anyway? 779 00:39:50,388 --> 00:39:54,662 He's nothing. He's less than nothing. I actually think he's pretty cool. 780 00:39:54,663 --> 00:39:57,896 We'll talk about this in the car. No, I think... I think I'd rather take the train. 781 00:40:01,670 --> 00:40:05,072 So the Dean seemed inscrutable to you, too? I don't think he even blinked. 782 00:40:05,073 --> 00:40:08,075 Well, since we're probably both gonna end up at hunter 783 00:40:08,076 --> 00:40:11,779 after what happened, I think we ought to say a proper good-bye. 784 00:40:11,780 --> 00:40:14,512 (Sighs) (Cell phone rings) 785 00:40:14,513 --> 00:40:17,184 Hello? (Dean berube) Serena, Dean berube. 786 00:40:17,185 --> 00:40:18,846 Oh, hello, sir. 787 00:40:18,847 --> 00:40:20,848 I just thought you should know 788 00:40:20,849 --> 00:40:22,850 that despite events at last night's reception, 789 00:40:22,851 --> 00:40:26,053 I-I remain most impressed with you, 790 00:40:26,054 --> 00:40:28,896 and come time for early acceptances in December, 791 00:40:28,897 --> 00:40:32,059 I'd check that list to see if your name was on it. 792 00:40:32,060 --> 00:40:35,062 Okay, but what about Blair? Well, like all the other students 793 00:40:35,063 --> 00:40:37,004 with Blair's qualifications, 794 00:40:37,005 --> 00:40:39,006 she will learn her fate in the spring. 795 00:40:39,007 --> 00:40:42,009 If it's all right with you, I'd like to issue a press release 796 00:40:42,010 --> 00:40:44,612 that you came up to visit our glorious campus. 797 00:40:44,613 --> 00:40:47,776 I'm gonna have to call you back. 798 00:40:50,719 --> 00:40:52,750 I won't accept. I can't, like this. 799 00:40:52,751 --> 00:40:54,982 What? No, you have to. 800 00:40:54,983 --> 00:40:57,555 It doesn't matter how you got it or why. 801 00:40:57,556 --> 00:40:59,787 It's an opportunity. 802 00:40:59,788 --> 00:41:02,089 No, you're my best friend. What's mine is yours. 803 00:41:02,090 --> 00:41:03,531 You can't share this. 804 00:41:03,532 --> 00:41:06,894 We'll find a way... 805 00:41:06,895 --> 00:41:07,966 Together. 806 00:41:11,500 --> 00:41:14,171 Dreams... everybody has them... 807 00:41:14,172 --> 00:41:17,044 Some good, some bad... 808 00:41:17,045 --> 00:41:19,608 Some you wish you could forget... 809 00:41:20,949 --> 00:41:25,713 Sometimes you realize you've outgrown them... 810 00:41:25,714 --> 00:41:29,788 Sometimes you feel like they're finally coming true... 811 00:41:33,091 --> 00:41:35,563 And some of us 812 00:41:35,564 --> 00:41:37,494 just have nightmares. 813 00:41:37,495 --> 00:41:39,868 (Both speaking indistinctly) 814 00:41:41,830 --> 00:41:43,831 But no matter what you dream, 815 00:41:43,832 --> 00:41:46,904 when morning comes, reality intrudes 816 00:41:46,905 --> 00:41:50,277 and the dream begins to slip away. 817 00:41:50,278 --> 00:41:54,542 Dream a little dream of me. 818 00:41:54,543 --> 00:41:56,915 X.o.x.o., gossip girl.