1 00:00:01,201 --> 00:00:03,001 Bullock: In the sprawling dark of night, 2 00:00:03,003 --> 00:00:08,206 when all is still... that's when it can be heard -- 3 00:00:08,208 --> 00:00:10,208 The Hum... 4 00:00:10,210 --> 00:00:12,811 [ Droning hum ] ...a ceaseless, enigmatic tone, 5 00:00:12,813 --> 00:00:19,284 heard only by a gifted few, its origin unknown. 6 00:00:19,286 --> 00:00:22,287 Electromagnetic energy? [ Thunder rumbling ] 7 00:00:22,289 --> 00:00:24,823 Alien transmission? 8 00:00:24,825 --> 00:00:29,828 Perhaps the echoes of some distant alternate dimension. 9 00:00:29,830 --> 00:00:35,300 Perhaps even the sound of our very doom. 10 00:00:35,302 --> 00:00:37,302 [ Humming continues ] If you ask me... 11 00:00:37,304 --> 00:00:39,438 I don't care. 12 00:00:39,440 --> 00:00:43,241 Because I prefer the hum... 13 00:00:43,243 --> 00:00:45,243 [ Engine revs, tires screech ] 14 00:00:45,245 --> 00:00:49,113 ...of my tricked-out IROC Z28! 15 00:00:49,115 --> 00:00:51,183 ♪ Unskinny bop ♪ Whoo-hoo! 16 00:00:51,185 --> 00:00:54,052 ♪ Just blows me away ♪ Whoo-hoo! 17 00:00:54,054 --> 00:00:56,655 Bullock: Enjoy the show, my babies! 18 00:00:56,657 --> 00:00:58,723 ♪ All night and day ♪♪ 19 00:00:58,725 --> 00:01:00,258 ♪♪ 20 00:01:00,260 --> 00:01:03,528 ♪ Good morning, U.S.A. ♪ 21 00:01:03,530 --> 00:01:06,130 [ Droning hum, insects chirping ] 22 00:01:06,132 --> 00:01:07,599 [ Chewing noisily ] 23 00:01:07,601 --> 00:01:09,401 Steve, I'm gonna tell you the same thing 24 00:01:09,403 --> 00:01:11,536 I said to Jackie Collins that one time -- 25 00:01:11,538 --> 00:01:14,606 No writing at the table on barbecue chicken night. 26 00:01:14,608 --> 00:01:16,408 Sorry. I'm just trying to decide 27 00:01:16,410 --> 00:01:18,943 which school work-study program to choose. 28 00:01:18,945 --> 00:01:20,479 It's either apprentice 29 00:01:20,481 --> 00:01:23,482 under weatherman Memphis Stormfront at Channel 3 News 30 00:01:23,484 --> 00:01:25,950 or Buckle at his urology clinic. 31 00:01:25,952 --> 00:01:29,021 Sounds like either way you're gonna be dealing with drips. 32 00:01:29,023 --> 00:01:30,422 Pa-dum, shh! [ Gasps ] 33 00:01:30,424 --> 00:01:32,957 But which one guarantees me a good grade? 34 00:01:32,959 --> 00:01:36,161 Which one is certain to put me on the path to success? 35 00:01:36,163 --> 00:01:40,232 Oh, Steve, no one knows for certain what the future holds. 36 00:01:40,234 --> 00:01:42,501 I just don't want to end up being one of those losers 37 00:01:42,503 --> 00:01:44,302 who lives with their parents as an adult. 38 00:01:44,304 --> 00:01:45,838 Hey! Sorry. No, no. 39 00:01:45,840 --> 00:01:48,841 W-What I mean is I don't want to be one of those poor dopes 40 00:01:48,843 --> 00:01:51,776 who lives their whole, sad life in the town they grew up in. 41 00:01:51,778 --> 00:01:54,312 Hey! So what, you're too good for us now? 42 00:01:54,314 --> 00:01:56,581 No! I love you guys! I do! 43 00:01:56,583 --> 00:02:00,985 It's just...I guess I've always seen more for myself than, 44 00:02:00,987 --> 00:02:02,521 you know...this. 45 00:02:02,523 --> 00:02:03,856 Hm. Hm. 46 00:02:03,858 --> 00:02:05,123 I feel ya, Steve. 47 00:02:05,125 --> 00:02:06,658 Big dreamers like you and me, 48 00:02:06,660 --> 00:02:08,727 we got to spread our golden wings. 49 00:02:08,729 --> 00:02:11,664 One day, we hit that open road and never look back. 50 00:02:11,666 --> 00:02:16,068 Actually, Dad, when I say "this"... 51 00:02:16,070 --> 00:02:17,335 that includes you. 52 00:02:17,337 --> 00:02:19,003 [ Gasps ] Roger, quick! 53 00:02:19,005 --> 00:02:21,606 Bring the fainting divan! 54 00:02:21,608 --> 00:02:23,408 Sorry, Stan. Already in use. 55 00:02:23,410 --> 00:02:26,679 'Cause one of my personas just received some shocking news. 56 00:02:26,681 --> 00:02:28,681 Everybody look the other way for a second. 57 00:02:28,683 --> 00:02:31,750 No. I already changed anyway. 58 00:02:31,752 --> 00:02:35,153 Walt Whipman, whip-crack session musician. 59 00:02:35,155 --> 00:02:36,488 I provide the whip-crack sounds 60 00:02:36,490 --> 00:02:38,957 for the many kinds of music that require them -- 61 00:02:38,959 --> 00:02:41,426 "Rawhide"-style TV Western themes, 62 00:02:41,428 --> 00:02:43,962 Devo cover bands, and the list goes on and on. 63 00:02:43,964 --> 00:02:46,498 Unfortunately, I earned something of a reputation 64 00:02:46,500 --> 00:02:48,767 back in the day for heavy drinking, shaky hands, 65 00:02:48,769 --> 00:02:52,036 and always accidentally whipping my fellow musicians in the face. 66 00:02:52,038 --> 00:02:55,374 Anyway, I just heard my old musician pal Roscoe 67 00:02:55,376 --> 00:02:57,509 is now a big-shot producer in Nashville, 68 00:02:57,511 --> 00:03:01,246 which obviously means that it is...comeback time! 69 00:03:01,248 --> 00:03:03,982 Why is there an ice cream scoop in my whip holster? 70 00:03:03,984 --> 00:03:07,051 Can we please get back to my real problem here? 71 00:03:07,053 --> 00:03:09,654 Which one of these work-studies is the right choice? 72 00:03:09,656 --> 00:03:11,523 Oh, now you're looking for advice 73 00:03:11,525 --> 00:03:12,925 from your horrible family? 74 00:03:12,927 --> 00:03:14,126 Seriously. 75 00:03:14,128 --> 00:03:15,860 Just flip a coin, why don't you? 76 00:03:15,862 --> 00:03:18,196 [ Sighs ] Maybe that's all I can do. 77 00:03:18,198 --> 00:03:20,399 Does anybody else hear that hum? 78 00:03:20,401 --> 00:03:22,534 Well, here goes nothing... 79 00:03:26,006 --> 00:03:29,274 Looks like I'll be taking my talents to Channel 3. 80 00:03:29,276 --> 00:03:30,943 Great, okay, whatever. Now... 81 00:03:30,945 --> 00:03:34,513 who's coming with me on my journey of redemption? 82 00:03:37,884 --> 00:03:39,083 Look... 83 00:03:39,085 --> 00:03:40,419 Up. 84 00:03:40,421 --> 00:03:42,755 Pack your shit. We're going to Nashville. 85 00:03:45,025 --> 00:03:46,592 [ TV theme plays ] 86 00:03:46,594 --> 00:03:49,661 And over there is our star anchor, Greg Corbin. 87 00:03:49,663 --> 00:03:51,263 Oh, we're actually neighbors. 88 00:03:51,265 --> 00:03:53,165 Hi, Mr. Corbin! 89 00:03:55,202 --> 00:03:56,802 Me, though, I'm an open book. 90 00:03:56,804 --> 00:03:59,671 You wanna know anything about me, just ask. 91 00:03:59,673 --> 00:04:01,740 Well, one thing I have always wondered... 92 00:04:01,742 --> 00:04:04,610 Is Memphis Stormfront your real name? 93 00:04:04,612 --> 00:04:06,544 [ Chuckles ] Oh my, no. 94 00:04:06,546 --> 00:04:08,546 I sure would've been a born weatherman 95 00:04:08,548 --> 00:04:11,216 if my name was really Memphis Stormfront. 96 00:04:11,218 --> 00:04:12,818 So what is your real name? 97 00:04:12,820 --> 00:04:13,952 Toledo Tornado. 98 00:04:13,954 --> 00:04:16,421 I changed it so no one would find out I'm... 99 00:04:16,423 --> 00:04:17,623 [Whispers] ...Italian. 100 00:04:17,625 --> 00:04:19,291 Now whaddya wanna see next? 101 00:04:19,293 --> 00:04:20,692 Oh, how about the Doppler? 102 00:04:20,694 --> 00:04:23,295 The Doppler? Yeah, the Doppler 12,000. 103 00:04:23,297 --> 00:04:24,496 It's up on the roof, righ--? 104 00:04:24,498 --> 00:04:26,164 Who told you about the Doppler? 105 00:04:26,166 --> 00:04:27,833 The...announcer 106 00:04:27,835 --> 00:04:30,035 at the beginning of every news broadcas-- 107 00:04:30,037 --> 00:04:32,638 I don't have time right now. It's actually pretty boring. 108 00:04:32,640 --> 00:04:34,772 It's a safety hazard. The Doppler's off-limits. 109 00:04:34,774 --> 00:04:38,644 So just get the hell off my back about it, okay? 110 00:04:38,646 --> 00:04:40,112 Don't mind him. Ahh! 111 00:04:40,114 --> 00:04:42,113 He's weird about that Doppler. 112 00:04:42,115 --> 00:04:43,381 Oh, hey. 113 00:04:43,383 --> 00:04:44,450 W--What's your name? 114 00:04:44,452 --> 00:04:47,185 Gassup E. Piye. [ "Gossipy P.A." ] 115 00:04:47,187 --> 00:04:49,521 French-Danish...? No. 116 00:04:49,523 --> 00:04:51,323 Memphis has been on edge lately. 117 00:04:51,325 --> 00:04:54,993 Probably because his forecast accuracy has been way down. 118 00:04:54,995 --> 00:04:58,196 And he knows he's on thin ice. 119 00:04:58,198 --> 00:04:59,597 Poor Memphis. 120 00:04:59,599 --> 00:05:01,667 More like poor you! 121 00:05:01,669 --> 00:05:05,137 Because if Memphis gets the axe, so does your work-study program. 122 00:05:05,139 --> 00:05:06,738 [ Cellphone rings ] 123 00:05:06,740 --> 00:05:08,674 And it's too late to switch to Buckle's urology clinic, 124 00:05:08,676 --> 00:05:11,143 because Barry already took that spot. 125 00:05:11,145 --> 00:05:12,344 That's right. 126 00:05:12,346 --> 00:05:14,480 I'm aware of Barry! 127 00:05:14,482 --> 00:05:15,747 Buh-byeeeeeeeee. 128 00:05:15,749 --> 00:05:17,149 Ahh! Stairs! [ Clattering ] 129 00:05:17,151 --> 00:05:18,884 Ow! Ooh! 130 00:05:18,886 --> 00:05:20,218 Oh! Ow! Ernngh! 131 00:05:20,220 --> 00:05:21,419 That's gotta hurt. 132 00:05:21,421 --> 00:05:23,489 Get away from me! 133 00:05:23,491 --> 00:05:25,023 And now we turn to the weather. 134 00:05:25,025 --> 00:05:26,424 What've you got for us, Memph? 135 00:05:26,426 --> 00:05:28,694 Cold, Greg, and lots of it. 136 00:05:28,696 --> 00:05:31,029 Perfect conditions for tomorrow's first ever 137 00:05:31,031 --> 00:05:34,366 Langley Classic Outdoor Hockey Invitational. 138 00:05:34,368 --> 00:05:39,438 So pack an extra set of clamps, 'cause it's gonna be nippy. 139 00:05:41,575 --> 00:05:45,643 The entire starting lineup of the Roanoke Ice Wasps 140 00:05:45,645 --> 00:05:48,780 is dead because of your faulty forecast! 141 00:05:48,782 --> 00:05:52,518 And I had thirty bucks on that game, Toledo. 142 00:05:52,520 --> 00:05:54,452 Mannaggia dio! 143 00:05:54,454 --> 00:05:58,123 The late, great Dickie Dobbins never had this kind of trouble. 144 00:05:58,125 --> 00:06:01,393 Using the very same Doppler as you, I might add. 145 00:06:01,395 --> 00:06:02,794 You leave the Doppler out of this! 146 00:06:02,796 --> 00:06:05,931 You screw up just one more time, and you'll be -- 147 00:06:05,933 --> 00:06:08,133 Does anyone else hear that humming sound? 148 00:06:08,135 --> 00:06:10,202 No? Nobody? 149 00:06:10,204 --> 00:06:12,338 Out on your ass! 150 00:06:12,340 --> 00:06:13,872 Ha-cha! 151 00:06:13,874 --> 00:06:15,673 You're gonna fire me, old man? 152 00:06:15,675 --> 00:06:18,143 Well how 'bout I wick-ah wick-ah! 153 00:06:18,145 --> 00:06:19,277 How 'bout that? 154 00:06:19,279 --> 00:06:21,413 Mr. Stormfront, do you think 155 00:06:21,415 --> 00:06:23,815 after all these wrong forecasts, 156 00:06:23,817 --> 00:06:25,751 maybe we should check out the Doppler 157 00:06:25,753 --> 00:06:27,285 to make sure it's working right? 158 00:06:27,287 --> 00:06:28,554 The Doppler is fine! 159 00:06:28,556 --> 00:06:30,021 Hey, check this out. 160 00:06:30,023 --> 00:06:31,289 Roundhouse! 161 00:06:31,291 --> 00:06:32,824 Ooh! Ow. 162 00:06:32,826 --> 00:06:35,894 It's just, I really don't want to lose this work-study -- 163 00:06:35,896 --> 00:06:37,029 Shhh. 164 00:06:37,031 --> 00:06:41,099 Iss's lissning! 165 00:06:41,101 --> 00:06:44,370 [Slurring] Ssay away from the Bloppler, kid. 166 00:06:44,372 --> 00:06:46,304 Stay... 167 00:06:46,306 --> 00:06:47,573 away... 168 00:06:47,575 --> 00:06:49,975 Screw this. I'm checking it out. 169 00:06:55,715 --> 00:06:57,449 The Doppler's not even plugged in 170 00:06:57,451 --> 00:06:59,585 to the station's computer system. 171 00:06:59,587 --> 00:07:01,854 He hasn't been using it at all. 172 00:07:10,398 --> 00:07:12,398 Alright, nothing too out of the... 173 00:07:12,400 --> 00:07:14,199 [ Gasp! ] 174 00:07:14,201 --> 00:07:18,336 ♪♪ 175 00:07:18,338 --> 00:07:21,339 [ Baby cries ] [ Applause ] 176 00:07:21,341 --> 00:07:23,875 Oh, my God. 177 00:07:23,877 --> 00:07:26,544 That thing doesn't forecast the weather. 178 00:07:26,546 --> 00:07:27,679 It shows... 179 00:07:27,681 --> 00:07:29,147 the future. 180 00:07:29,149 --> 00:07:30,748 Then again, I'm pretty sure I saw 181 00:07:30,750 --> 00:07:32,150 Snot winning Prom King in there, 182 00:07:32,152 --> 00:07:34,953 so maybe it's just a bunch of random B.S. 183 00:07:34,955 --> 00:07:37,889 Sure, it was all just part of a cruel prank 184 00:07:37,891 --> 00:07:39,424 planned by the popular kids -- 185 00:07:39,426 --> 00:07:42,360 and, I have reason to believe, some of the teachers -- 186 00:07:42,362 --> 00:07:46,364 but I'm still just absolutely over the moon! 187 00:07:46,366 --> 00:07:47,800 [ Thump! ] 188 00:07:50,304 --> 00:07:53,706 ♪♪ 189 00:07:53,708 --> 00:07:56,975 Memphis: Ssay away from the Bloppler, kid. 190 00:07:56,977 --> 00:07:58,443 What could be so dangerous 191 00:07:58,445 --> 00:08:02,047 about takin' a little peep into the ol' futuro? 192 00:08:02,583 --> 00:08:06,451 ♪♪ 193 00:08:06,453 --> 00:08:08,520 Wh-- is this... 194 00:08:08,522 --> 00:08:12,324 the mayor's mansion? 195 00:08:12,326 --> 00:08:13,525 This is... 196 00:08:13,527 --> 00:08:16,328 tomorrow. 197 00:08:16,330 --> 00:08:18,130 Delilah, darling! 198 00:08:18,132 --> 00:08:20,064 I have grand news! 199 00:08:20,066 --> 00:08:23,268 The Sharks are going to the championship! 200 00:08:23,270 --> 00:08:26,338 The game was such a rout that I left early and -- 201 00:08:26,340 --> 00:08:27,472 What?? 202 00:08:27,474 --> 00:08:29,207 Coach Trey? 203 00:08:29,209 --> 00:08:30,943 My best friend?! 204 00:08:30,945 --> 00:08:32,945 Jimmy, it's not what it looks like! 205 00:08:32,947 --> 00:08:34,879 We're not just resting in bed together. 206 00:08:34,881 --> 00:08:38,350 Until a few seconds ago we were having sex, too. 207 00:08:38,352 --> 00:08:39,818 [ Crying ] 208 00:08:39,820 --> 00:08:42,554 You'll pay for this, cuckolder! 209 00:08:42,556 --> 00:08:44,156 Just bear with me one sec. 210 00:08:44,158 --> 00:08:45,690 Delilah: Jimmuh! Jimmuh, baybuh, please. 211 00:08:45,692 --> 00:08:47,292 Stop and think! 212 00:08:47,294 --> 00:08:48,160 Oh Jimmuh, baybuh. 213 00:08:48,162 --> 00:08:49,628 It didn't mean nothin'! Please! 214 00:08:49,630 --> 00:08:50,963 Look at my neck, it's pleading with you! 215 00:08:50,965 --> 00:08:52,430 Baby, we can talk about this, Jimmuh! 216 00:08:52,432 --> 00:08:53,632 You don't wanna do this, Jimmy! 217 00:08:53,634 --> 00:08:56,034 [ Overlapping pleading ] [ Screams ] 218 00:08:56,036 --> 00:08:58,370 [ Gunshot ] 219 00:08:58,372 --> 00:08:59,838 Oh, my God! 220 00:08:59,840 --> 00:09:01,974 I have to do something! 221 00:09:01,976 --> 00:09:05,177 Incredible tip on that playoff blowout, Steve. 222 00:09:05,179 --> 00:09:06,779 That's just the kind of thing that can earn a boy 223 00:09:06,781 --> 00:09:10,448 an A plus on his work-study, if you catch my meaning. 224 00:09:10,450 --> 00:09:12,317 Wink! 225 00:09:12,319 --> 00:09:13,918 Wink wink wink! 226 00:09:13,920 --> 00:09:16,321 [ Western music playing ] 227 00:09:16,323 --> 00:09:19,792 Roscoe, thank you so much for agreeing to meet me here. 228 00:09:19,794 --> 00:09:21,726 I...didn't. 229 00:09:21,728 --> 00:09:23,395 You and your... 230 00:09:23,397 --> 00:09:24,729 boyfriend? 231 00:09:24,731 --> 00:09:26,131 Followed me in here. 232 00:09:26,133 --> 00:09:28,000 Well, you're looking great, I'll tell you that. 233 00:09:28,002 --> 00:09:30,469 Except for that... yuck, on your face. 234 00:09:30,471 --> 00:09:32,404 What happened there? You... 235 00:09:32,406 --> 00:09:34,139 whipped me, many years ago -- 236 00:09:34,141 --> 00:09:36,475 Oh, God, I was hoping not to talk shop, 237 00:09:36,477 --> 00:09:37,876 but since you brought it up, 238 00:09:37,878 --> 00:09:40,945 I'm guessing you've seen my ad in the country music trades? 239 00:09:40,947 --> 00:09:43,215 Dammit. That's supposed to say "whip crack." 240 00:09:43,217 --> 00:09:45,617 Well, I was pretty drunk when I ordered the ad. 241 00:09:45,619 --> 00:09:46,951 But I've cleaned up since then, 242 00:09:46,953 --> 00:09:50,355 and now I'm totally sober and ready to lick crack. 243 00:09:50,357 --> 00:09:51,756 You know what I mean. 244 00:09:51,758 --> 00:09:53,758 Listen, Walt, now I am about to record 245 00:09:53,760 --> 00:09:55,894 a new Rawhide-style TV Western theme, 246 00:09:55,896 --> 00:09:58,831 and am in desperate need of a whip man, 247 00:09:58,833 --> 00:10:02,835 but it's just... all those faces you whipped. 248 00:10:02,837 --> 00:10:05,303 Now you listen to me, Race Car. 249 00:10:05,305 --> 00:10:07,506 You have to give this man another shot. 250 00:10:07,508 --> 00:10:10,042 Without second chances, where would any of us be? 251 00:10:10,044 --> 00:10:13,912 [ Patriotic music playing in background ] Didn't America give the South a second chance 252 00:10:13,914 --> 00:10:15,247 after the Civil War? 253 00:10:15,249 --> 00:10:18,183 Sure, that one turned out to be a huge mistake, 254 00:10:18,185 --> 00:10:22,855 but the point still stands, and that point is... 255 00:10:22,857 --> 00:10:24,989 Something about Roger? 256 00:10:24,991 --> 00:10:26,191 Walt. 257 00:10:26,193 --> 00:10:27,059 Whipman. 258 00:10:27,061 --> 00:10:28,660 Whipcrack session musician. 259 00:10:28,662 --> 00:10:32,397 Alright, I'll give you one shot. 260 00:10:32,399 --> 00:10:35,333 Say, you fellas hear that strange kinda humming sound? 261 00:10:35,335 --> 00:10:36,668 No. 262 00:10:36,670 --> 00:10:39,238 Here, would you mind covering your face up with this napkin? 263 00:10:40,340 --> 00:10:41,940 ♪♪ 264 00:10:41,942 --> 00:10:44,609 Day after day, just one hot sports tip 265 00:10:44,611 --> 00:10:46,545 and news scoop after another. 266 00:10:46,547 --> 00:10:47,880 And now I'm rich! 267 00:10:47,882 --> 00:10:49,882 Rich as Sir Topham Hatt! 268 00:10:49,884 --> 00:10:52,084 How do you do it, Steven? 269 00:10:52,086 --> 00:10:53,151 Heh. 270 00:10:53,153 --> 00:10:55,420 J--Just lucky, I guess. Here. 271 00:10:55,422 --> 00:10:57,756 Help yourself to a Todd McFarlane figurine. 272 00:10:57,758 --> 00:10:59,692 Oh, don't mind if I d-- ohhh. 273 00:11:00,160 --> 00:11:06,231 ♪♪ 274 00:11:06,233 --> 00:11:08,633 Are you alright? 275 00:11:08,635 --> 00:11:11,636 Yeah, just a little... 276 00:11:11,638 --> 00:11:13,105 black ooze. 277 00:11:13,107 --> 00:11:14,840 [ Snorts ] 278 00:11:17,912 --> 00:11:19,844 Memphis: You've been using it, haven't you? 279 00:11:19,846 --> 00:11:21,246 [ Gasp! ] 280 00:11:21,248 --> 00:11:22,314 Haven't you? 281 00:11:22,316 --> 00:11:25,918 Do you have any idea what forces you're tampering with? 282 00:11:25,920 --> 00:11:28,386 Forces of good...? 283 00:11:28,388 --> 00:11:30,855 Why do you think I stopped using the damn thing? 284 00:11:30,857 --> 00:11:33,258 Well, you'll soon find out for yourself 285 00:11:33,260 --> 00:11:37,462 what it is to be both terrified and enthralled by it, 286 00:11:37,464 --> 00:11:40,198 to despise and desire it. 287 00:11:40,200 --> 00:11:45,404 You inside of it and it inside of you. 288 00:11:45,406 --> 00:11:47,339 I gotta go. 289 00:11:47,341 --> 00:11:50,342 Oh, Mommy, oh, Mommy, oh, Mommy. Here I come, Mommy! 290 00:11:50,344 --> 00:11:52,611 And now our very own Memphis Stormfront 291 00:11:52,613 --> 00:11:54,679 joins us with a look at the weekend weather. 292 00:11:54,681 --> 00:11:56,014 Memph? 293 00:11:56,016 --> 00:11:59,217 Not all that is old was once young. 294 00:11:59,219 --> 00:12:02,687 Not all that's forgotten is gone. 295 00:12:02,689 --> 00:12:07,892 The nameless one, dreaming of fire, but slumbers, 296 00:12:07,894 --> 00:12:12,497 to awaken some cursed, blood-wrought dawn. 297 00:12:12,499 --> 00:12:13,698 [ Chuckles ] 298 00:12:13,700 --> 00:12:15,033 Sounds like it's gonna be a hot one. 299 00:12:15,035 --> 00:12:16,701 Stay kooky, Memphis. 300 00:12:16,703 --> 00:12:20,238 Okay, clearly I should not be tampering with that Doppler. 301 00:12:20,240 --> 00:12:21,373 Well, yeah. 302 00:12:21,375 --> 00:12:24,309 Besides, I'm pretty sure I've got that A 303 00:12:24,311 --> 00:12:26,311 on my work-study locked up already, 304 00:12:26,313 --> 00:12:31,115 so I am never using the Doppler again. 305 00:12:31,117 --> 00:12:32,985 Right after one teensy little look-see 306 00:12:32,987 --> 00:12:36,188 to make sure it's an A plus. 307 00:12:36,323 --> 00:12:39,524 ♪♪ 308 00:12:39,526 --> 00:12:40,993 ♪♪ 309 00:12:40,995 --> 00:12:42,594 [ Screaming ] 310 00:12:42,596 --> 00:12:44,596 [ Roar! ] 311 00:12:44,598 --> 00:12:48,667 ♪♪ 312 00:12:48,669 --> 00:12:51,269 Oh, God, my family! 313 00:12:51,271 --> 00:12:52,937 No! 314 00:12:52,939 --> 00:12:54,873 Noooooooo! 315 00:12:54,875 --> 00:12:56,941 Do you mind? 316 00:12:56,943 --> 00:12:59,211 Are you enjoying the show? 317 00:12:59,213 --> 00:13:00,879 [ Whistling ] 318 00:13:00,881 --> 00:13:05,250 No, God, nooooo! 319 00:13:08,956 --> 00:13:10,556 Listen to me! Please! 320 00:13:10,558 --> 00:13:12,224 Something terrible is coming! 321 00:13:12,226 --> 00:13:14,960 Oh, more terrible than your family? 322 00:13:14,962 --> 00:13:17,563 I'm sorry I hurt your feelings, okay? 323 00:13:17,565 --> 00:13:20,832 But some kind of monster is coming, 324 00:13:20,834 --> 00:13:22,700 and it's gonna kill us all! 325 00:13:22,702 --> 00:13:24,502 [ Whistles ] 326 00:13:24,504 --> 00:13:25,771 Please! 327 00:13:25,773 --> 00:13:28,841 We have to get out of here and try to find someplace safe! 328 00:13:30,110 --> 00:13:31,910 Ahh! 329 00:13:31,912 --> 00:13:33,412 [ Door slams ] 330 00:13:37,117 --> 00:13:40,518 He's gotta have something here that explains the Doppler, 331 00:13:40,520 --> 00:13:42,654 that monster, all of it. 332 00:13:42,656 --> 00:13:44,856 Pornography, pornography... 333 00:13:44,858 --> 00:13:47,459 creepy ancient scroll, pornography... 334 00:13:47,461 --> 00:13:50,862 Wait a minute! 335 00:13:50,864 --> 00:13:53,799 Wow, an interview with Adrien Brody. 336 00:13:53,801 --> 00:13:55,867 I'll just save this for later. 337 00:13:55,869 --> 00:13:57,936 Wait a minute! 338 00:13:57,938 --> 00:14:00,272 A creepy ancient scroll! 339 00:14:00,274 --> 00:14:01,807 My pornography! 340 00:14:01,809 --> 00:14:04,142 And scroll. 341 00:14:04,144 --> 00:14:05,077 Ahh! 342 00:14:05,079 --> 00:14:07,479 Mr. Stormfront! Please, no! 343 00:14:07,481 --> 00:14:08,947 Ahh! 344 00:14:08,949 --> 00:14:10,282 [ Sighs ] 345 00:14:10,284 --> 00:14:14,086 God, how I wish he'd never left me that damned orb. 346 00:14:14,088 --> 00:14:16,822 What is the Doppler, really? 347 00:14:16,824 --> 00:14:18,890 It isn't a Doppler at all. 348 00:14:18,892 --> 00:14:21,559 It's some kind of ancient alien instrument 349 00:14:21,561 --> 00:14:25,431 that Dickie Dobbins found buried deep beneath the Mojave Desert. 350 00:14:25,433 --> 00:14:28,366 It gave him the ability to see the future -- 351 00:14:28,368 --> 00:14:31,437 the power of absolute certainty. 352 00:14:31,439 --> 00:14:34,039 Mm, yeah, man's desire for certainty. 353 00:14:34,041 --> 00:14:35,373 Been kind of a theme lately. 354 00:14:35,375 --> 00:14:38,243 But in the end... it killed him. 355 00:14:38,245 --> 00:14:40,646 Are you sure he didn't just die of being... 356 00:14:40,648 --> 00:14:42,380 you know, super old? 357 00:14:42,382 --> 00:14:44,049 He was 32! 358 00:14:44,051 --> 00:14:46,251 But that's what the thing does to you. 359 00:14:46,253 --> 00:14:49,121 Decays you. Twists your soul. 360 00:14:49,123 --> 00:14:53,659 So much so that some even come to want to summon... 361 00:14:53,661 --> 00:14:54,993 The creature. 362 00:14:54,995 --> 00:14:56,462 What is it? 363 00:14:56,464 --> 00:15:00,532 It's a being so terrifying, it's impossible to even describe. 364 00:15:00,534 --> 00:15:04,670 Face of an eel, arms like giant squids, 365 00:15:04,672 --> 00:15:09,941 classic dragon's body, six wobbly baby giraffe legs, 366 00:15:09,943 --> 00:15:14,746 standing an immeasurable 3,097 feet tall! 367 00:15:14,748 --> 00:15:15,881 It is... 368 00:15:15,883 --> 00:15:19,417 B'thazalom, the Nameless One! 369 00:15:19,419 --> 00:15:22,488 The Nameless One's name is B'thazalom? 370 00:15:22,490 --> 00:15:25,891 Please don't be a dick about this, okay? 371 00:15:25,893 --> 00:15:27,359 Oh, my God. 372 00:15:27,361 --> 00:15:29,695 The Doppler and the monster... 373 00:15:29,697 --> 00:15:31,163 B'thazalom the Nameless. 374 00:15:31,165 --> 00:15:33,298 Uh-huh. They're linked. 375 00:15:33,300 --> 00:15:37,102 The Doppler has been sending out these vibrations to it, 376 00:15:37,104 --> 00:15:38,636 waking it up. 377 00:15:38,638 --> 00:15:39,705 I'm impressed. 378 00:15:39,707 --> 00:15:41,439 You're scroll-reading at a twelfth-grade level. 379 00:15:41,441 --> 00:15:45,043 So the only way to make certain it stays buried 380 00:15:45,045 --> 00:15:47,379 is to destroy the Doppler. 381 00:15:47,381 --> 00:15:49,647 Roger sure would've been handy to have around 382 00:15:49,649 --> 00:15:51,316 for all this cosmic crap. 383 00:15:51,318 --> 00:15:53,919 He better be doing something really important. 384 00:15:53,921 --> 00:15:56,255 [ Western music playing ] 385 00:15:59,126 --> 00:16:01,860 ♪ Racin', pacin', chasin' ♪ 386 00:16:01,862 --> 00:16:04,329 ♪ Make those dogies hasten ♪ 387 00:16:04,331 --> 00:16:06,332 ♪ Though your chaps are chafin' ♪ 388 00:16:06,334 --> 00:16:08,934 ♪ Gotta bring those heifers home ♪ 389 00:16:08,936 --> 00:16:14,139 ♪ Cow driiive ♪ 390 00:16:14,141 --> 00:16:19,411 ♪ Cow driiive ♪ 391 00:16:19,413 --> 00:16:20,946 ♪ Take 'em in, turn 'em out ♪ 392 00:16:20,948 --> 00:16:22,147 ♪ Round 'em up, rub 'em down ♪ 393 00:16:22,149 --> 00:16:23,415 ♪ Take it off, make 'em shout ♪ 394 00:16:23,417 --> 00:16:24,816 ♪ Bring a friend, go to town ♪ 395 00:16:24,818 --> 00:16:29,955 ♪ Cow driiiiiiiiii... ♪ 396 00:16:29,957 --> 00:16:34,960 ♪ Cow driiiiiiiiii... ♪ 397 00:16:34,962 --> 00:16:37,295 [ Mooing ] 398 00:16:37,297 --> 00:16:39,831 ♪ ...iiiiive ♪ 399 00:16:39,833 --> 00:16:41,166 Whip crack! 400 00:16:41,168 --> 00:16:43,101 Oh, crap! Damn it! 401 00:16:43,103 --> 00:16:46,638 Alright, just download an mp3 of a whip and let's go home. 402 00:16:46,640 --> 00:16:48,907 Wait, no, I can do this! 403 00:16:48,909 --> 00:16:50,175 [ Screams ] 404 00:16:50,177 --> 00:16:51,777 [ Whip cracking, screaming ] 405 00:16:51,779 --> 00:16:53,178 [ Moo! ] 406 00:16:53,180 --> 00:16:56,115 Ahh! 407 00:16:57,585 --> 00:16:59,918 ♪♪ 408 00:16:59,920 --> 00:17:02,654 [ Groan! ] 409 00:17:02,656 --> 00:17:03,989 Ahh! 410 00:17:03,991 --> 00:17:05,857 It's defending itself, Steve! 411 00:17:05,859 --> 00:17:09,795 Blasting your mind with the most horrible things imaginable! 412 00:17:09,797 --> 00:17:11,863 Ahh! 413 00:17:11,865 --> 00:17:14,933 ♪♪ 414 00:17:14,935 --> 00:17:16,134 Ahh! 415 00:17:16,136 --> 00:17:17,803 [ Creak! ] 416 00:17:17,805 --> 00:17:20,672 [ Groan! ] 417 00:17:20,674 --> 00:17:24,276 [ Crash! ] 418 00:17:24,278 --> 00:17:26,011 It's all over. 419 00:17:26,013 --> 00:17:30,148 You don't know how right you are. 420 00:17:30,150 --> 00:17:31,417 No. 421 00:17:31,419 --> 00:17:33,751 You had it wrong, Steve. 422 00:17:33,753 --> 00:17:36,622 The orb wasn't waking the Nameless One. 423 00:17:36,624 --> 00:17:40,292 It was the only thing keeping it asleep. 424 00:17:40,294 --> 00:17:43,361 I never was able to bring myself to destroy it, 425 00:17:43,363 --> 00:17:45,096 but then it showed me... 426 00:17:45,098 --> 00:17:48,500 It showed me that you would do it for me. 427 00:17:48,502 --> 00:17:54,039 And now, thanks to you, B'thazalom rises! 428 00:17:54,041 --> 00:17:56,975 [ Dramatic music plays ] 429 00:17:56,977 --> 00:18:00,245 [ Roar! ] 430 00:18:00,247 --> 00:18:01,779 Aw, [bleep] A! 431 00:18:01,781 --> 00:18:04,650 You gotta admit, that's sick as hell. 432 00:18:04,652 --> 00:18:07,786 [ Roar! ] 433 00:18:08,055 --> 00:18:09,855 What have I done? 434 00:18:09,857 --> 00:18:14,192 [ Roaring ] 435 00:18:14,194 --> 00:18:18,730 ♪♪ 436 00:18:18,732 --> 00:18:21,733 [ Cackles ] 437 00:18:21,735 --> 00:18:26,204 There's only one true certainty in this world, Steve -- 438 00:18:26,206 --> 00:18:29,675 that eventually, it must end! 439 00:18:29,677 --> 00:18:31,477 Why, Mr. Stormfront? 440 00:18:31,479 --> 00:18:33,479 What's in all this for you? 441 00:18:33,481 --> 00:18:37,949 Well, I assume I'll be rewarded with mighty cosmic power -- 442 00:18:37,951 --> 00:18:39,551 [ Splat! ] 443 00:18:39,553 --> 00:18:41,153 Ahh! 444 00:18:41,689 --> 00:18:43,155 [ Screaming ] 445 00:18:43,157 --> 00:18:45,223 [ Roar! ] 446 00:18:45,225 --> 00:18:49,161 ♪♪ 447 00:18:49,163 --> 00:18:50,762 [ Screaming in distance ] 448 00:18:50,764 --> 00:18:54,900 Natalie, what in the heck is all that racket out there? 449 00:18:54,902 --> 00:18:57,035 Some kind of behemoth from beyond time and space, 450 00:18:57,037 --> 00:18:58,370 Dr. Buckle. 451 00:18:58,372 --> 00:19:00,906 Oh, for the love of Pete... 452 00:19:00,908 --> 00:19:03,108 [ Screaming ] 453 00:19:03,110 --> 00:19:04,976 [ Splat! ] 454 00:19:04,978 --> 00:19:07,579 [ Sirens wail in distance ] 455 00:19:08,982 --> 00:19:10,716 [ Gasping breath ] 456 00:19:10,718 --> 00:19:12,984 ♪♪ 457 00:19:12,986 --> 00:19:15,721 Oh, thank God! I'm not too late. 458 00:19:15,723 --> 00:19:18,424 [ Roar! ] 459 00:19:18,992 --> 00:19:21,193 Nooooo! 460 00:19:21,195 --> 00:19:22,594 [ Tires squeal ] 461 00:19:22,596 --> 00:19:24,262 Steve, get in! 462 00:19:24,264 --> 00:19:25,663 You're alive! 463 00:19:25,665 --> 00:19:27,199 Yeah, after you said all that crazy stuff, 464 00:19:27,201 --> 00:19:29,401 we decided to pack up the car, just in case. 465 00:19:29,403 --> 00:19:31,469 And when we didn't find you at the TV station -- 466 00:19:31,471 --> 00:19:33,405 You came back here to look for me? 467 00:19:33,407 --> 00:19:36,674 Of course we did. We're your family. 468 00:19:36,676 --> 00:19:40,478 And that's the one thing you can always be certain of. 469 00:19:40,480 --> 00:19:42,948 I actually voted to leave you behind. 470 00:19:42,950 --> 00:19:44,650 [ Tires squeal ] 471 00:19:46,486 --> 00:19:48,486 Oh, God, it's horrible! 472 00:19:48,488 --> 00:19:50,622 My whipping comeback went horrible! 473 00:19:50,624 --> 00:19:51,689 Hang on, gang. 474 00:19:51,691 --> 00:19:53,691 The world may be ending, but the Smiths 475 00:19:53,693 --> 00:19:57,162 will always live on to have further adventures. 476 00:19:57,164 --> 00:20:00,899 [ Roar! ] 477 00:20:01,368 --> 00:20:02,901 Or maybe not. 478 00:20:02,903 --> 00:20:04,169 It's too late. 479 00:20:04,171 --> 00:20:06,104 This really is the end... 480 00:20:06,106 --> 00:20:07,573 of... 481 00:20:07,575 --> 00:20:10,108 everything. 482 00:20:10,110 --> 00:20:14,580 [ Roar! ] 483 00:20:14,582 --> 00:20:18,183 [ Humming sound in distance ] 484 00:20:18,185 --> 00:20:26,858 ♪♪ 485 00:20:26,860 --> 00:20:30,729 [ Humming getting louder ] 486 00:20:30,731 --> 00:20:35,801 ♪♪ 487 00:20:35,803 --> 00:20:40,272 ♪♪ 488 00:20:40,274 --> 00:20:42,474 Does anybody else hear that hum? 489 00:20:42,476 --> 00:20:44,877 Well, here goes nothing. 490 00:20:47,347 --> 00:20:49,214 Looks like I'll be taking my talents 491 00:20:49,216 --> 00:20:54,419 to the Buckle Group's Cash Only Walk-In Urology Center. 492 00:20:54,421 --> 00:20:57,956 I mean, but c'mon. You gotta do Channel 3. 493 00:20:57,958 --> 00:20:59,692 Buh-bye. See you soon.