1
00:00:01,635 --> 00:00:02,935
What's up, Stan?
2
00:00:02,937 --> 00:00:04,436
Wanna go to the mall
3
00:00:04,438 --> 00:00:05,838
and accidentally bump kids
into the fountain?
4
00:00:05,840 --> 00:00:07,306
Not a chance.
5
00:00:07,308 --> 00:00:09,441
I got the day off
and nothin' to worry about.
6
00:00:09,443 --> 00:00:11,643
Gonna spend it relaxing
right here.
7
00:00:11,645 --> 00:00:13,979
Nothing to worry about?
In this house?
8
00:00:13,981 --> 00:00:16,648
I give it five minutes before
one of us ruins it for you.
9
00:00:16,650 --> 00:00:18,684
The only question is,
who will it be?
10
00:00:18,686 --> 00:00:19,985
Hey, Dad!
11
00:00:19,987 --> 00:00:21,687
Oh, it's gonna be Steve!
12
00:00:21,689 --> 00:00:23,555
I made a new friend
on the edge of town.
13
00:00:23,557 --> 00:00:25,824
He won't tell me his name!
14
00:00:25,826 --> 00:00:27,726
No, that's
an inappropriate friend!
15
00:00:27,728 --> 00:00:29,495
And then
there's Hayley and Jeff.
16
00:00:29,497 --> 00:00:31,830
Dad,
I need a pregnancy test,
17
00:00:31,832 --> 00:00:34,500
and Jeff and I are too high
to drive to the drug store.
18
00:00:34,502 --> 00:00:37,736
Getting high helps me
prolong our lovemaking.
19
00:00:40,241 --> 00:00:42,141
How's your worry-free day
goin', Stan?
20
00:00:42,143 --> 00:00:43,842
Look, we all know
what the results
21
00:00:43,844 --> 00:00:45,577
of the pregnancy test
is going to be.
22
00:00:45,579 --> 00:00:47,179
Jeff smokes so much weed --
23
00:00:47,181 --> 00:00:50,082
ALL:
How much weed does he smoke?
24
00:00:50,084 --> 00:00:53,385
That -- That there's no way
he could get a girl pregnant?
25
00:00:53,387 --> 00:00:56,555
I mean, it's --
It's not really a joke.
26
00:00:56,557 --> 00:00:58,424
But -- But I could
think of one!
27
00:00:58,426 --> 00:00:59,725
Oh, you lost them, Stan.
28
00:00:59,727 --> 00:01:01,160
Look, if it's not this,
29
00:01:01,162 --> 00:01:02,828
your family will hit you
with something else.
30
00:01:02,830 --> 00:01:05,330
I mean, you haven't even heard
what I'm up to this week.
31
00:01:05,332 --> 00:01:07,166
I'm trying to get
our house included
32
00:01:07,168 --> 00:01:09,168
on a list of potential
World Cup sites.
33
00:01:09,170 --> 00:01:10,569
Oh, no.
That -- That's, like,
34
00:01:10,571 --> 00:01:12,404
the biggest sporting event
in the world.
35
00:01:12,406 --> 00:01:14,506
Picture it --
in our backyard,
36
00:01:14,508 --> 00:01:17,209
120,000
horny soccer hooligans,
37
00:01:17,211 --> 00:01:18,944
each of them hornier
than the last.
38
00:01:18,946 --> 00:01:21,213
I know it sounds crazy,
but FIFA's narrowed it down
39
00:01:21,215 --> 00:01:23,749
to either Soldier Field
or where our pool is now.
40
00:01:23,751 --> 00:01:25,451
(groans)
(machine beeps)
41
00:01:25,453 --> 00:01:27,619
Look, Stan,
you can't even see
42
00:01:27,621 --> 00:01:29,721
the pack of light bulbs
I'm stealing.
43
00:01:29,723 --> 00:01:31,723
We can afford those!
(machine beeps)
44
00:01:31,725 --> 00:01:33,892
That's what I'm trying
to tell ya, Stan.
45
00:01:33,894 --> 00:01:35,260
You can't relax around us.
46
00:01:35,262 --> 00:01:38,130
Mr. S.,
I got us dancing Coke cans.
47
00:01:38,132 --> 00:01:39,565
Did you get
the pregnancy test?
48
00:01:39,567 --> 00:01:40,933
You're silly, Mr. S.
49
00:01:40,935 --> 00:01:43,235
I'm a boy.
I can't get pregnant!
50
00:01:43,237 --> 00:01:46,605
(machine beeping rapidly)
(whispers)
There's no escaping us.
51
00:01:46,607 --> 00:01:48,774
Dad, can my friend
have dinner with us?
52
00:01:48,776 --> 00:01:50,142
I won't be any bother.
53
00:01:50,144 --> 00:01:52,044
I'll just eat
from your boy's plate.
54
00:01:52,046 --> 00:01:54,046
(beeps rapidly,
continuous tone sounds)
55
00:01:54,048 --> 00:01:55,948
Wait. What?!
What does this mean?
56
00:01:55,950 --> 00:02:00,319
It means
you are going to die...
57
00:02:00,321 --> 00:02:02,154
unless you lower
your blood pressure.
58
00:02:02,156 --> 00:02:05,324
Oh, God! How do I do that?
There's only one way.
59
00:02:05,326 --> 00:02:08,393
You have to reduce
your stress or...
60
00:02:08,395 --> 00:02:10,796
you'll perish.
61
00:02:10,798 --> 00:02:17,169
(laughing evilly)
62
00:02:18,739 --> 00:02:20,172
Oh, paper towels.
63
00:02:20,174 --> 00:02:22,441
I should probably get a roll
for the World Cup.
64
00:02:22,443 --> 00:02:24,510
You know, for messes.
65
00:02:24,512 --> 00:02:27,012
(patriotic music plays)
66
00:02:27,014 --> 00:02:30,282
¶ Good morning, U.S.A. ¶
67
00:02:30,284 --> 00:02:33,685
¶ I got a feelin' that
it's gonna be a wonderful day ¶
68
00:02:33,687 --> 00:02:37,022
¶ The sun in the sky
has a smile on his face ¶
69
00:02:37,024 --> 00:02:41,093
¶ And he's shinin' a salute
to the American race ¶
70
00:02:42,963 --> 00:02:46,298
¶ Oh, boy, it's swell to say ¶
71
00:02:46,300 --> 00:02:48,600
¶ Good -- ¶
¶ Good morning, U.S.A. ¶
72
00:02:48,602 --> 00:02:49,902
Aah!
73
00:02:51,138 --> 00:02:54,540
¶ Good morning, U.S.A. ¶
74
00:02:57,044 --> 00:03:00,512
All right, everyone,
as the great Humpty once rapped,
75
00:03:00,514 --> 00:03:02,848
"Stop what you're doin'
'cause I'm about to ruin..."
76
00:03:02,850 --> 00:03:05,017
whatever it was
that you were doing.
77
00:03:05,019 --> 00:03:07,319
Computer, engage.
78
00:03:07,321 --> 00:03:09,521
(switch clicks, screens whirs)
79
00:03:09,523 --> 00:03:11,323
(beep)
80
00:03:11,325 --> 00:03:14,326
Last night, the C.I.A. mainframe
was hit by a cyber terrorist.
81
00:03:14,328 --> 00:03:16,895
They acquired a lot
of valuable information.
82
00:03:16,897 --> 00:03:19,331
And if you know anyone
undercover in Bolivia,
83
00:03:19,333 --> 00:03:20,699
you don't anymore.
84
00:03:20,701 --> 00:03:22,467
Now all evidence suggests
85
00:03:22,469 --> 00:03:27,172
this attack was carried out
by cyber terrorist Max Zegarra.
86
00:03:27,174 --> 00:03:30,542
And we know exactly where
he's hiding.
87
00:03:30,544 --> 00:03:31,877
So the boring stuff's done.
88
00:03:31,879 --> 00:03:33,312
You need someone to do
the fun part?
89
00:03:33,314 --> 00:03:34,546
Grab him and bag him?
90
00:03:34,548 --> 00:03:36,014
That's one way to go,
91
00:03:36,016 --> 00:03:38,550
but last night I was watching
"Point Break" on TBS
92
00:03:38,552 --> 00:03:40,986
when I realized,
what if this attack
93
00:03:40,988 --> 00:03:43,822
was pulled off by
a pack of renegade surfers
94
00:03:43,824 --> 00:03:46,091
trying to fund
an endless summer?!
95
00:03:46,093 --> 00:03:48,594
Sir, that's crazy!
Jackson gets it!
96
00:03:48,596 --> 00:03:50,862
Now, all I need is
someone to infiltrate
97
00:03:50,864 --> 00:03:52,331
the local surf community
98
00:03:52,333 --> 00:03:54,733
and bring the law breakers
to justice.
99
00:03:54,735 --> 00:03:57,035
Is surfing that sport
that happens at the beach,
100
00:03:57,037 --> 00:03:58,604
the most relaxed place
on Earth,
101
00:03:58,606 --> 00:04:00,372
nowhere near
your stressful family?
102
00:04:00,374 --> 00:04:03,508
Oh, ho! Look who knows
everything about surfing!
103
00:04:03,510 --> 00:04:06,411
Smith, my friend,
the assignment is yours.
104
00:04:08,282 --> 00:04:11,116
STAN: Perfect.
Now I just have to blend in.
105
00:04:13,554 --> 00:04:16,755
Out of the way, haole!
You're on my line.
106
00:04:16,757 --> 00:04:19,925
(chain saw whirring)
107
00:04:19,927 --> 00:04:22,127
Aah! Aah!
108
00:04:22,129 --> 00:04:23,595
(grunts)
109
00:04:26,967 --> 00:04:29,968
What's up, haole?
This beach is for locals only.
110
00:04:29,970 --> 00:04:31,570
What's your zip code,
bitch?
111
00:04:31,572 --> 00:04:33,939
And don't...lie.
112
00:04:33,941 --> 00:04:35,507
KAI:
Hey, leave him alone!
113
00:04:38,912 --> 00:04:41,280
Back off.
The beach is for everyone.
114
00:04:41,282 --> 00:04:42,648
Says who?
115
00:04:42,650 --> 00:04:44,750
The city bylaws.
116
00:04:44,752 --> 00:04:47,119
Yeah? Well,
I'm gonna go down to City Hall
117
00:04:47,121 --> 00:04:49,755
and talk to the head
of the records department.
118
00:04:49,757 --> 00:04:53,458
And then we'll see about
your little "theory."
119
00:04:53,460 --> 00:04:56,628
You're lucky, haole.
This isn't over.
120
00:04:58,332 --> 00:05:01,300
Whoa! Thanks!
Yeah, no problem, man.
121
00:05:01,302 --> 00:05:04,403
Don't worry about those guys.
They just don't like outsiders.
122
00:05:04,405 --> 00:05:06,338
How could they tell
I'm not local?
123
00:05:06,340 --> 00:05:09,308
Well, trying to surf a rowboat's
a pretty big red flag.
124
00:05:09,310 --> 00:05:11,276
You don't really have
a beach vibe.
125
00:05:11,278 --> 00:05:12,744
A beach vibe.
126
00:05:12,746 --> 00:05:14,946
It's so simple.
127
00:05:14,948 --> 00:05:16,848
Do I have it now?
128
00:05:16,850 --> 00:05:18,250
All right, tell you what --
129
00:05:18,252 --> 00:05:20,152
come back tomorrow,
and I'll show you.
130
00:05:20,154 --> 00:05:21,620
By the way, I'm Kai.
131
00:05:21,622 --> 00:05:23,855
I was named after
one of the Hawaiian Islands.
132
00:05:23,857 --> 00:05:25,424
Which one?
Maui.
133
00:05:25,426 --> 00:05:27,492
The best one. Nice!
134
00:05:27,494 --> 00:05:30,495
Not sure how you get "Kai"
out of that, but nice.
135
00:05:33,701 --> 00:05:35,600
(doorbell rings)
136
00:05:35,602 --> 00:05:37,336
(Italian accent)
Buongiorno.
137
00:05:37,338 --> 00:05:39,705
I am from FIFA's World Cup
site selection committee.
138
00:05:39,707 --> 00:05:41,606
Ugh. Roger!
139
00:05:41,608 --> 00:05:43,208
But I must make a mistake.
140
00:05:43,210 --> 00:05:45,711
This is no stadium.
This is a house.
141
00:05:45,713 --> 00:05:48,113
Actually,
it's more of a home...
142
00:05:48,115 --> 00:05:50,716
Home of
the future World Cup.
143
00:05:50,718 --> 00:05:52,117
(chuckles)
144
00:05:52,119 --> 00:05:53,719
Clever.
145
00:05:53,721 --> 00:05:56,788
But being clever is only 60%
of the selection process.
146
00:05:56,790 --> 00:05:58,690
Let's talk
security infrastructure.
147
00:05:58,692 --> 00:06:01,126
Oh, yes, of course.
Business before pleasure.
148
00:06:01,128 --> 00:06:03,128
But before that, pleasure.
149
00:06:03,130 --> 00:06:05,030
Ants on a log?
150
00:06:05,032 --> 00:06:06,865
The ant.
151
00:06:06,867 --> 00:06:09,801
(crunches) The ant...
152
00:06:09,803 --> 00:06:11,470
is amazing.
153
00:06:11,472 --> 00:06:13,305
Oh, thank God.
But...
154
00:06:13,307 --> 00:06:14,906
I have not tried the log.
155
00:06:14,908 --> 00:06:17,008
(gasps)
(crunches)
156
00:06:17,010 --> 00:06:19,311
All right, that's it.
I'm out.
157
00:06:20,414 --> 00:06:22,647
The log --
158
00:06:22,649 --> 00:06:24,383
she is incredible.
159
00:06:24,385 --> 00:06:27,753
I'm telling you, a-a Ferrari
is faster than a cop car.
160
00:06:27,755 --> 00:06:30,489
Steve, a cop car can catch
a Ferrari. Trust me.
161
00:06:30,491 --> 00:06:32,357
Dad, can you believe
this guy?
162
00:06:32,359 --> 00:06:34,760
Ugh.
This is still happening?
163
00:06:34,762 --> 00:06:37,195
I-I gotta --
I-I gotta go to the beach.
164
00:06:37,197 --> 00:06:39,698
(The Hollywood Tornadoes'
"Bustin' Surfboards" playing)
165
00:06:39,700 --> 00:06:42,200
You know why
I love surfing, Stan?
166
00:06:42,202 --> 00:06:44,703
It's all about learning
to let go.
167
00:06:44,705 --> 00:06:48,106
You know, I fathered six kids
in three different countries,
168
00:06:48,108 --> 00:06:50,409
and I just let 'em
all go.
169
00:06:50,411 --> 00:06:51,777
I can't let go.
170
00:06:51,779 --> 00:06:53,545
I have to be responsible
for my family.
171
00:06:53,547 --> 00:06:55,747
If I let go,
all hell would break loose.
172
00:06:55,749 --> 00:06:58,116
Stan, make me a promise.
173
00:06:58,118 --> 00:07:00,452
The right wave is gonna come,
dude.
174
00:07:00,454 --> 00:07:03,889
And when it does, you're gonna
let go of your worries.
175
00:07:03,891 --> 00:07:06,558
Just go with the flow.
176
00:07:06,560 --> 00:07:08,059
Whenever.
177
00:07:08,061 --> 00:07:11,963
This one! P-Paddle!
Paddle, Stan! Now, now, now!
178
00:07:17,604 --> 00:07:22,374
Stan, hamburger buns were
on sale, so I stole 600.
179
00:07:22,376 --> 00:07:25,710
When I have a baby,
I'm gonna name it, "Recycling."
180
00:07:25,712 --> 00:07:27,813
Dad,
me and my mysterious friend
181
00:07:27,815 --> 00:07:29,381
are blood brothers now!
182
00:07:29,383 --> 00:07:31,483
Stan, FIFA says
the downstairs bathroom's
183
00:07:31,485 --> 00:07:33,118
gonna need 70 urinals.
184
00:07:33,120 --> 00:07:34,920
It'll work if we move
the hamper.
185
00:07:34,922 --> 00:07:38,356
KAI: Remember, Stan!
Let go!
186
00:07:42,729 --> 00:07:44,663
I'm doing it!
187
00:07:48,402 --> 00:07:50,101
Ahh.
188
00:07:50,103 --> 00:07:51,837
Looks like
you're startin' to get it.
189
00:07:51,839 --> 00:07:54,473
I feel so...relaxed.
190
00:07:54,475 --> 00:07:56,508
Whoa, is that a soul patch?
191
00:07:56,510 --> 00:07:59,277
Huh. It must've grown in
during my ride.
192
00:07:59,279 --> 00:08:02,814
Stan, it looks really good.
193
00:08:07,187 --> 00:08:10,121
I didn't know we got a hammock.
When did we get a hammock?
194
00:08:10,123 --> 00:08:12,424
Oh, sorry.
Didn't see you on the phone.
195
00:08:12,426 --> 00:08:15,994
All good, Klaus. I'm just
listening to the surf report.
196
00:08:15,996 --> 00:08:18,763
4-foot swells
and glassy as hell.
197
00:08:18,765 --> 00:08:21,500
Sounds like glassy is
where it's at, bro.
198
00:08:21,502 --> 00:08:22,868
Tap it.
199
00:08:22,870 --> 00:08:26,505
Ooh, I like Surfer Stan.
He's the chillest.
200
00:08:26,507 --> 00:08:29,140
Dad, my new friend needs to
stop by his ex-wife's house
201
00:08:29,142 --> 00:08:31,676
to pick up some stuff,
and he asked me to be lookout.
202
00:08:31,678 --> 00:08:33,778
Can we take your car?
He's not allowed to drive
203
00:08:33,780 --> 00:08:35,614
'cause the state's
a bunch of assholes.
204
00:08:35,616 --> 00:08:37,883
Yeah, do your thing.
That worked?
205
00:08:37,885 --> 00:08:40,485
Go, Steve.
Don't question it. Just go.
206
00:08:40,487 --> 00:08:41,820
Oh, hey, Stan, good news.
207
00:08:41,822 --> 00:08:43,288
We've been approved
for a liquor license
208
00:08:43,290 --> 00:08:44,623
for the World Cup.
209
00:08:44,625 --> 00:08:47,192
We can sell beer,
wine, and soju.
210
00:08:47,194 --> 00:08:49,127
We can make soju cocktails.
211
00:08:49,129 --> 00:08:51,196
They taste like normal cocktails
except they suck
212
00:08:51,198 --> 00:08:52,697
and they taste like
nail polish.
213
00:08:52,699 --> 00:08:54,499
Sounds dank, bro.
214
00:08:54,501 --> 00:08:55,867
Relax, Stan.
215
00:08:55,869 --> 00:08:57,369
Wait.
What's wrong with you?
216
00:08:57,371 --> 00:08:59,704
I got a quarter million-person
liquor license
217
00:08:59,706 --> 00:09:02,641
for the stadium
I'm building in your backyard.
218
00:09:02,643 --> 00:09:04,643
There are gonna be
Costa Ricans on your property.
219
00:09:04,645 --> 00:09:05,977
That doesn't worry you?
220
00:09:05,979 --> 00:09:07,646
Guess you didn't get
the memo.
221
00:09:07,648 --> 00:09:11,349
I'm a surfer now,
and I don't have worries.
222
00:09:11,351 --> 00:09:14,953
Sorry, I had your copy
of the memo.
223
00:09:17,991 --> 00:09:21,059
(chuckles) I thought I might
see you back out here.
224
00:09:21,061 --> 00:09:22,661
Looks like you got the bug.
225
00:09:22,663 --> 00:09:24,729
Is that why my stool
is crazy loose?
226
00:09:24,731 --> 00:09:27,933
No, Stan. I think it's that
starfish we all saw you eat.
227
00:09:27,935 --> 00:09:30,068
I'm talking about
the surf bug, bro,
228
00:09:30,070 --> 00:09:32,203
where all you think about
is surfin'.
229
00:09:32,205 --> 00:09:34,606
Is that all you think about?
Surfin' waves?
230
00:09:34,608 --> 00:09:38,410
Truth is, there's only one wave
I think about surfing anymore.
231
00:09:38,412 --> 00:09:41,379
You know how waves, like,
go from the ocean to the shore?
232
00:09:41,381 --> 00:09:42,747
Okay!
233
00:09:42,749 --> 00:09:44,849
Well, legend has it,
every decade,
234
00:09:44,851 --> 00:09:47,586
there's a freak weather system
over the Atlantic
235
00:09:47,588 --> 00:09:49,187
that reverses the jet stream,
236
00:09:49,189 --> 00:09:50,855
and on one beach in Florida,
237
00:09:50,857 --> 00:09:53,592
you can catch a wave
that starts on the beach
238
00:09:53,594 --> 00:09:57,562
and ride it all the way
to the center of the Atlantic.
239
00:09:57,564 --> 00:09:59,931
Stranded in the middle
of the Atlantic?
240
00:09:59,933 --> 00:10:02,367
Your worries will never
find you there.
241
00:10:02,369 --> 00:10:07,305
Anyway, how about right now,
we ride this wave together?
242
00:10:07,307 --> 00:10:09,307
Sounds good. After you.
243
00:10:09,309 --> 00:10:11,076
No, Stan. Together.
244
00:10:11,078 --> 00:10:13,578
Got it. Me first.
245
00:10:13,580 --> 00:10:16,648
(surf rock music playing)
246
00:10:28,128 --> 00:10:30,595
Whoo-hoo!
(cheering)
247
00:10:30,597 --> 00:10:33,798
Stan, meet the crew --
Gorney, Sam, and Taylor.
248
00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:35,266
That was amazing!
249
00:10:35,268 --> 00:10:37,102
Dude, you're a natural!
250
00:10:37,104 --> 00:10:38,436
Kai, big news, man.
251
00:10:38,438 --> 00:10:40,238
There's a typhoon
in the Atlantic
252
00:10:40,240 --> 00:10:42,140
that's reversing
the jet stream.
253
00:10:42,142 --> 00:10:44,643
This is it, Stan!
The wave that goes out!
254
00:10:44,645 --> 00:10:47,012
Are you kidding me?
We were just talking about that.
255
00:10:47,014 --> 00:10:49,347
We're going to Florida,
and you're coming with us.
256
00:10:49,349 --> 00:10:50,782
(cellphone rings)
257
00:10:50,784 --> 00:10:52,917
(beep)
Mahalo, Deputy D.
258
00:10:52,919 --> 00:10:54,352
Stow that surf shit, Smith!
259
00:10:54,354 --> 00:10:56,488
We caught the hacker,
so I'm bringing you in.
260
00:10:56,490 --> 00:10:58,289
You're back at your desk
tomorrow.
261
00:10:58,291 --> 00:10:59,624
STAN: What?!
262
00:10:59,626 --> 00:11:01,526
Turns out "Point Break"
wasn't the clue.
263
00:11:01,528 --> 00:11:03,862
It was just the movie that
was on when I was super high.
264
00:11:03,864 --> 00:11:05,830
But now that I'm
medium high,
265
00:11:05,832 --> 00:11:09,768
I realize it was ridiculous
to suspect those surfers at all.
266
00:11:09,770 --> 00:11:11,636
Okay, they may not be hackers...
(laughter)
267
00:11:11,638 --> 00:11:13,438
But I have a hunch
they're up to something.
268
00:11:13,440 --> 00:11:15,440
It -- It's way too soon
to take me off the case.
269
00:11:15,442 --> 00:11:18,043
A hunch isn't good enough.
I need evidence!
270
00:11:18,045 --> 00:11:20,545
No worries, brah.
271
00:11:20,547 --> 00:11:21,913
(beeps)
272
00:11:26,787 --> 00:11:28,119
(gunshot)
(customers scream)
273
00:11:28,121 --> 00:11:29,487
My name is Kai.
274
00:11:29,489 --> 00:11:31,356
This is Gorney, Taylor,
and Sam.
275
00:11:31,358 --> 00:11:34,192
We are surfers,
and this is a bank robbery.
276
00:11:34,194 --> 00:11:35,694
(high-pitched voice)
You tell 'em, Kai!
277
00:11:35,696 --> 00:11:37,395
(low-pitched voice)
We're doing this to fund
278
00:11:37,397 --> 00:11:39,497
our surf adventures.
(thud)
279
00:11:39,499 --> 00:11:41,700
(wood creaks)
280
00:11:41,702 --> 00:11:43,168
(wood rattling)
281
00:11:43,170 --> 00:11:45,837
(normal voice)
And we laugh at the C.I.A.!
282
00:11:45,839 --> 00:11:47,172
Ha ha ha ha!
283
00:11:47,174 --> 00:11:48,740
Ha ha ha --
284
00:11:48,742 --> 00:11:50,875
And they're laughing at us.
That's what really gets me.
285
00:11:50,877 --> 00:11:52,877
Are we sure they're not
laughing with us?
286
00:11:52,879 --> 00:11:54,813
This is why I need
to stay on the beach.
287
00:11:54,815 --> 00:11:56,881
It might take a lifetime
of undercover work
288
00:11:56,883 --> 00:11:58,249
to bring them all
to justice.
289
00:11:58,251 --> 00:12:00,218
They just robbed a bank
on video!
290
00:12:00,220 --> 00:12:02,387
We've got all we need.
Bring them in.
291
00:12:02,389 --> 00:12:05,523
But th-this case goes deeper.
This is just the tip.
292
00:12:05,525 --> 00:12:07,392
The tip is my favorite part,
Smith.
293
00:12:07,394 --> 00:12:08,927
The tip's all I need.
294
00:12:08,929 --> 00:12:10,695
Any more than that,
and it's too much!
295
00:12:10,697 --> 00:12:12,497
Well, I-I-I wanna bring them in
as much as anyone.
296
00:12:12,499 --> 00:12:15,333
But can't it be after I surf
a little bit more?
297
00:12:15,335 --> 00:12:18,103
We're gonna go to Florida
and surf the wave that goes out!
298
00:12:18,105 --> 00:12:19,537
It's called Firestone Beach,
299
00:12:19,539 --> 00:12:21,372
but the locals call it
Shady Cove.
300
00:12:21,374 --> 00:12:23,274
And I wanna go there
and surf with them!
301
00:12:23,276 --> 00:12:25,110
They're my best friends!
Best friends?
302
00:12:25,112 --> 00:12:27,178
One --
that hurts my feelings.
303
00:12:27,180 --> 00:12:29,848
Two -- the fact that they are
your best friends
304
00:12:29,850 --> 00:12:31,549
makes me hate them even more!
305
00:12:31,551 --> 00:12:33,351
Bring them in immediately!
306
00:12:33,353 --> 00:12:34,919
But, Sir --
Just go!
307
00:12:34,921 --> 00:12:37,589
(voice breaks)
I don't want you to see me cry.
308
00:12:37,591 --> 00:12:40,291
Drive, drive, drive!
(tires peal)
309
00:12:40,293 --> 00:12:44,429
(gasps) Those low-key surfers
have kidnapped my best friend.
310
00:12:44,431 --> 00:12:46,598
But where?
Where are they taking him?!
311
00:12:46,600 --> 00:12:49,067
He said something about
a beach. What was it?
312
00:12:49,069 --> 00:12:51,569
Damn it, Avery.
He's your best friend!
313
00:12:51,571 --> 00:12:53,371
You should've been listening!
314
00:12:53,373 --> 00:12:56,407
This is why he's looking for
other best friends!
315
00:12:56,409 --> 00:12:58,209
(surf rock music playing)
316
00:12:58,211 --> 00:12:59,544
Yes!
317
00:12:59,546 --> 00:13:01,780
The music's a clue.
Follow it.
318
00:13:01,782 --> 00:13:04,849
¶¶
319
00:13:11,625 --> 00:13:14,359
(surf rock music playing)
320
00:13:18,632 --> 00:13:20,965
Hanging with you guys
is the best.
321
00:13:20,967 --> 00:13:23,401
And this horchata stuff
is on point.
322
00:13:23,403 --> 00:13:25,069
I gotta tell you, Kai,
323
00:13:25,071 --> 00:13:27,138
there is literally nothing
that can ruin this for me.
324
00:13:27,140 --> 00:13:28,840
(buzzing)
325
00:13:28,842 --> 00:13:31,810
Don't worry about it.
Don't worry about it.
326
00:13:31,812 --> 00:13:33,144
(buzzing)
327
00:13:33,146 --> 00:13:34,512
Look at that,
328
00:13:34,514 --> 00:13:36,948
I didn't worry,
and the bee flew away
329
00:13:36,950 --> 00:13:40,151
right across the street
and onto Dick's jacket.
330
00:13:40,153 --> 00:13:43,121
(screaming)
331
00:13:43,123 --> 00:13:44,656
(gunshots)
332
00:13:44,658 --> 00:13:46,124
(gasps) Dick! The C.I.A.!
Everyone in the van!
333
00:13:46,126 --> 00:13:47,759
We can't just get in the van.
334
00:13:47,761 --> 00:13:49,594
We gotta finish
chillin' first.
335
00:13:49,596 --> 00:13:51,963
Well,
chill as fast as you can!
(slurping loudly)
336
00:13:51,965 --> 00:13:55,033
(gunshots continue)
(Dick screaming)
337
00:13:56,837 --> 00:13:59,871
(gunshots and screaming
continue)
338
00:14:02,375 --> 00:14:04,509
(slurping and screaming stop)
All right, good chill.
339
00:14:04,511 --> 00:14:05,977
(gunshots continue)
340
00:14:05,979 --> 00:14:08,179
(cellphone rings
and vibrates)
341
00:14:08,181 --> 00:14:09,714
(beep)
342
00:14:09,716 --> 00:14:10,982
(beep)
343
00:14:10,984 --> 00:14:12,383
Hey, Stan,
you need to get home.
344
00:14:12,385 --> 00:14:14,385
I went with
an iffy scaffolding company,
345
00:14:14,387 --> 00:14:16,054
and there is, uh...
346
00:14:16,056 --> 00:14:18,389
there's a lot
of dead migrant workers here.
347
00:14:18,391 --> 00:14:20,892
Their families are asking
a lot of questions.
348
00:14:20,894 --> 00:14:22,894
I could really use somebody
on damage control.
349
00:14:22,896 --> 00:14:25,697
So...get here.
(beep)
350
00:14:25,699 --> 00:14:27,966
He could be anywhere.
351
00:14:27,968 --> 00:14:29,667
Oh, God. What did I do?!
352
00:14:29,669 --> 00:14:32,503
Stan, you're hiding it
really well, bro,
353
00:14:32,505 --> 00:14:35,240
but I know you,
and you seem stressed.
354
00:14:35,242 --> 00:14:38,309
I have something to tell you,
and you're not gonna like it.
355
00:14:38,311 --> 00:14:39,744
I work for the C.I.A.,
356
00:14:39,746 --> 00:14:42,146
and I was sent undercover
to investigate you guys.
357
00:14:42,148 --> 00:14:44,716
But why?
We're not bad guys.
358
00:14:44,718 --> 00:14:46,684
I know.
You're awesome guys.
359
00:14:46,686 --> 00:14:48,987
So awesome,
I decided to frame you
360
00:14:48,989 --> 00:14:50,688
so I could stay undercover.
361
00:14:50,690 --> 00:14:54,859
I robbed a bank and made
the C.I.A. think you did it.
362
00:14:54,861 --> 00:14:57,195
It's cool.
You're not mad?
363
00:14:57,197 --> 00:14:59,397
What? Because you made us
enemies of the state?
364
00:14:59,399 --> 00:15:01,866
We can't get hung up
on every little thing.
365
00:15:01,868 --> 00:15:04,335
The thing is, if we go to
the wave that goes out,
366
00:15:04,337 --> 00:15:06,070
they'll probably find us.
367
00:15:06,072 --> 00:15:08,673
And if they do, they'll shoot
first and ask questions later.
368
00:15:08,675 --> 00:15:10,541
I get it, dude.
369
00:15:10,543 --> 00:15:12,410
Hey, guys!
Put out the bonfire.
370
00:15:12,412 --> 00:15:15,046
Stan's in the C.I.A.
and framed us for a crime.
371
00:15:15,048 --> 00:15:17,515
His boss will kill us
if he, like, finds us,
372
00:15:17,517 --> 00:15:20,051
which means we're not going to
surf the wave that goes out.
373
00:15:20,053 --> 00:15:21,386
Cool.
Sounds good.
374
00:15:21,388 --> 00:15:22,687
Righteous.
375
00:15:22,689 --> 00:15:24,289
(hisses)
376
00:15:26,293 --> 00:15:29,794
I'm sorry you guys aren't gonna
be able to surf that wave.
377
00:15:29,796 --> 00:15:33,031
Do you guys think
the stars have waves?
378
00:15:33,033 --> 00:15:34,632
I bet they do, man.
379
00:15:34,634 --> 00:15:37,702
I bet there's even aliens
that surf those star waves.
380
00:15:37,704 --> 00:15:41,773
They probably even have
a Space Surfer magazine.
381
00:15:41,775 --> 00:15:44,309
You know there's
so many sick photos
382
00:15:44,311 --> 00:15:47,045
of aliens riding waves
in that magazine.
383
00:15:47,047 --> 00:15:50,114
Wow, nothing really fazes
you guys, huh?
384
00:15:50,116 --> 00:15:53,184
(insects chirping)
385
00:15:57,390 --> 00:15:58,723
Do you have any secrets?
386
00:15:58,725 --> 00:16:00,258
I got one secret.
387
00:16:00,260 --> 00:16:02,627
How about I tell you a secret,
then you tell me yours?
388
00:16:02,629 --> 00:16:04,462
I can't tell ya my secret.
389
00:16:04,464 --> 00:16:07,432
If I tell ya,
you won't like me anymore.
390
00:16:07,434 --> 00:16:10,168
Impossible.
You could tell me anything.
391
00:16:10,170 --> 00:16:12,270
We'll be friends
to the end.
392
00:16:12,272 --> 00:16:13,604
Yeah.
393
00:16:13,606 --> 00:16:17,008
Friends to the very end.
394
00:16:17,010 --> 00:16:19,744
Man, this is the best.
395
00:16:19,746 --> 00:16:23,414
Hey, what do you --
What do you see over there?
396
00:16:23,416 --> 00:16:26,551
(surf rolling)
397
00:16:29,022 --> 00:16:30,955
KAI: Dear Stan...
(Santo & Johnny's "Sleep Walk"
playing)
398
00:16:30,957 --> 00:16:33,691
I know I said I was okay not
surfing the wave that goes out,
399
00:16:33,693 --> 00:16:36,961
but then I woke up to pee
and decided I wanted to.
400
00:16:36,963 --> 00:16:39,364
Hope you're not worried.
We're not.
401
00:16:39,366 --> 00:16:41,666
Love always, Kai.
402
00:16:45,605 --> 00:16:47,121
P.S...
(song stops)
403
00:16:47,122 --> 00:16:48,638
(song resumes)
I wrote that postscript
pretty close to the water.
404
00:16:48,641 --> 00:16:51,309
So if it got washed away
by a wave,
405
00:16:51,311 --> 00:16:52,844
don't worry because...
(song stops)
406
00:16:52,846 --> 00:16:54,645
...no worries.
407
00:16:54,647 --> 00:16:57,382
I'm sorry, Kai,
but there are worries.
408
00:16:57,384 --> 00:16:58,950
There are lots of worries.
409
00:16:58,952 --> 00:17:01,185
For instance,
I'm standing on a jellyfish,
410
00:17:01,187 --> 00:17:03,287
and the jellyfish
has attracted wolves...
411
00:17:03,289 --> 00:17:07,392
(growling)
...and the wolves are being
hunted by poachers.
412
00:17:07,394 --> 00:17:09,227
You've seen too much.
413
00:17:09,229 --> 00:17:10,628
(gun cocks)
414
00:17:10,630 --> 00:17:14,132
(lively beach music
playing)
415
00:17:14,134 --> 00:17:16,300
Thanks for getting me out of
that scrape back there, Herbie.
416
00:17:16,302 --> 00:17:17,802
Although
I still think you could've
417
00:17:17,804 --> 00:17:19,837
let those poachers live.
(Ahooga horn blows)
418
00:17:19,839 --> 00:17:21,139
Well,
we all have to come
419
00:17:21,141 --> 00:17:22,874
to our own moral conclusions
in life.
420
00:17:22,876 --> 00:17:24,976
I hope you make it back
to your race in time.
421
00:17:24,978 --> 00:17:26,811
(tires peal)
422
00:17:29,249 --> 00:17:30,715
I don't get it, Kai.
423
00:17:30,717 --> 00:17:32,850
The waves are all going
the normal direction.
424
00:17:32,852 --> 00:17:34,585
Relax, man.
425
00:17:34,587 --> 00:17:37,422
The wave that goes out comes
when you least expect it...
426
00:17:37,424 --> 00:17:39,424
every 10 years...
427
00:17:39,426 --> 00:17:41,225
on the dot.
428
00:17:41,227 --> 00:17:43,694
(suspenseful music plays)
429
00:17:43,696 --> 00:17:45,096
(brakes screech)
Oh, no!
430
00:17:45,098 --> 00:17:47,698
All right,
everyone have their sun block?
431
00:17:47,700 --> 00:17:50,001
Good. Safety first.
432
00:17:50,003 --> 00:17:51,602
Now let's find out
433
00:17:51,604 --> 00:17:53,538
if I'm pointing this
rocket launcher the right way.
434
00:17:53,540 --> 00:17:55,006
3...2...
435
00:17:55,008 --> 00:17:56,441
Wait! No!
436
00:17:56,443 --> 00:17:57,742
Oh, great, Smith.
437
00:17:57,744 --> 00:18:00,211
Now I have to start counting
all over.
438
00:18:00,213 --> 00:18:01,846
Stan,
what are you doing here?
439
00:18:01,848 --> 00:18:03,081
We told you not to worry.
440
00:18:03,083 --> 00:18:05,416
The thing is, I'm a worrier.
441
00:18:05,418 --> 00:18:08,252
I was worrying about my family,
and that stressed me out,
442
00:18:08,254 --> 00:18:10,021
so I tried to get away
from them.
443
00:18:10,023 --> 00:18:12,623
But I just started worrying
about you guys.
444
00:18:12,625 --> 00:18:15,526
Turns out if I love someone,
I worry about them.
445
00:18:15,528 --> 00:18:17,895
And if someone's gonna
stress me out,
446
00:18:17,897 --> 00:18:20,465
I'd rather it be my family
than you guys.
447
00:18:20,467 --> 00:18:23,468
Did Stan just say
he loves us?
448
00:18:23,470 --> 00:18:25,636
He did, Gorney. He did.
449
00:18:25,638 --> 00:18:27,939
I robbed the bank.
It was me.
450
00:18:27,941 --> 00:18:29,707
I did it because I wanted
to keep hanging out
451
00:18:29,709 --> 00:18:31,943
with my friends.
They're not your friends!
452
00:18:31,945 --> 00:18:34,612
Friends wouldn't let you
rob a bank all by yourself.
453
00:18:34,614 --> 00:18:38,116
I'd be shoulder to shoulder
with you, Smith, blasting away!
454
00:18:38,118 --> 00:18:40,151
Just...like...this!
455
00:18:40,153 --> 00:18:41,886
Get out of here!
Fire!
456
00:18:41,888 --> 00:18:43,221
(gunshots)
457
00:18:43,223 --> 00:18:45,323
Kai, what should we do?!
458
00:18:45,325 --> 00:18:48,192
Whatever you do,
don't worry!
459
00:18:50,263 --> 00:18:52,130
Hang dead.
460
00:18:52,132 --> 00:18:54,298
(rocket whooshes)
461
00:18:56,970 --> 00:19:00,404
It's real, Stan!
The wave that goes out is real!
462
00:19:00,406 --> 00:19:04,442
I'll never forget you!
463
00:19:04,444 --> 00:19:06,978
Damn! Looks like
they got away.
464
00:19:06,980 --> 00:19:09,580
But a wave can only
go out so far
465
00:19:09,582 --> 00:19:13,084
before it's a wave
coming back in somewhere else.
466
00:19:13,086 --> 00:19:16,154
And I've got a hot tip
on where that might be.
467
00:19:16,156 --> 00:19:19,223
(surf rock music playing)
468
00:19:22,929 --> 00:19:24,495
Where?
469
00:19:28,501 --> 00:19:29,934
Dad, great news.
470
00:19:29,936 --> 00:19:31,936
My nameless friend
just finished making wine
471
00:19:31,938 --> 00:19:33,271
in the upstairs toilet.
472
00:19:33,273 --> 00:19:35,139
Now we're gonna bottle it.
Wanna watch?
473
00:19:35,141 --> 00:19:36,607
Hey, Mr. S.
474
00:19:36,609 --> 00:19:39,043
(sighs) It's been
a pretty stressful few days
475
00:19:39,045 --> 00:19:40,645
for Hayley and I.
476
00:19:40,647 --> 00:19:42,780
Unfortunately, the pregnancy
test came back negative.
477
00:19:42,782 --> 00:19:44,282
But it got us talking,
478
00:19:44,284 --> 00:19:46,551
and we've decided that
we're ready to have kids.
479
00:19:46,553 --> 00:19:47,885
All we're asking for is
480
00:19:47,887 --> 00:19:49,954
your emotional
and financial support.
481
00:19:49,956 --> 00:19:51,656
(hammering)
482
00:19:51,658 --> 00:19:53,558
Stan,
we lost the World Cup bid.
483
00:19:53,560 --> 00:19:55,226
But don't worry.
Don't worry.
484
00:19:55,228 --> 00:19:58,229
If we act fast, I think
we can get the Boston Marathon.
485
00:19:58,231 --> 00:20:00,831
(hammering)
Stop hammering!
486
00:20:00,833 --> 00:20:02,133
They'll have to find
somewhere else
487
00:20:02,135 --> 00:20:03,868
for people to run
the Boston Marathon!
488
00:20:03,870 --> 00:20:06,737
And you two! You're not even
close to ready to have kids!
489
00:20:06,739 --> 00:20:09,040
And, Steve, you numbnuts,
this man is a drifter!
490
00:20:09,042 --> 00:20:11,576
He needs to go!
But he doesn't have
anywhere to go!
491
00:20:11,578 --> 00:20:13,311
He has everywhere!
492
00:20:13,313 --> 00:20:15,413
Steve, don't argue
with your dad.
493
00:20:15,415 --> 00:20:17,181
He just saved your life.
494
00:20:17,183 --> 00:20:21,052
Boop! That was my secret.
(chuckles) Best get driftin'.
495
00:20:21,054 --> 00:20:23,187
Honey,
what's all the yelling?
496
00:20:23,189 --> 00:20:25,723
You're supposed to be
avoiding stress.
497
00:20:25,725 --> 00:20:27,091
I don't have to.
498
00:20:27,093 --> 00:20:28,593
I went back to the drug store,
499
00:20:28,595 --> 00:20:30,361
and that old crone
runs the photo department.
500
00:20:30,363 --> 00:20:33,164
So I went to a real doctor,
and he gave me pills,
501
00:20:33,166 --> 00:20:36,000
and I took all of them
because I love you idiots,
502
00:20:36,002 --> 00:20:37,335
and that causes me
503
00:20:37,337 --> 00:20:39,637
(slurring)
a lot of stress.
504
00:20:42,008 --> 00:20:43,841
It's okay.
He's breathing.
505
00:20:43,843 --> 00:20:45,509
Let's draw a dick
on his face.
506
00:20:45,511 --> 00:20:47,511
Of course I know what
one looks like,
507
00:20:47,513 --> 00:20:49,447
but, Hayley,
why don't you draw it?
508
00:20:50,917 --> 00:20:53,684
Hi, I'm big wave rider
Laird Hamilton.
509
00:20:53,686 --> 00:20:55,386
We made some jokes tonight
510
00:20:55,388 --> 00:20:58,422
about people abusing
prescription drugs.
511
00:20:58,424 --> 00:21:02,126
I just wanted to point that out.
It was pretty funny.
512
00:21:02,128 --> 00:21:04,128
Bye! Have a beautiful time!
513
00:21:06,132 --> 00:21:07,798
-- Captions by VITAC --