1 00:00:04,177 --> 00:00:06,778 ♪ Good morning, USA! ♪ 2 00:00:06,846 --> 00:00:09,665 ♪ American Dad 6x11 ♪ A Piñata Named Desire Original Air Date on February 13, 2011 3 00:00:09,732 --> 00:00:11,700 Listen, Rose, 4 00:00:11,768 --> 00:00:14,302 you're gonna go on and make lots of babies, 5 00:00:14,370 --> 00:00:15,988 and you're gonna watch them grow. 6 00:00:16,055 --> 00:00:19,374 Promise me you'll survive. 7 00:00:19,442 --> 00:00:22,744 Never... let go. 8 00:00:26,716 --> 00:00:29,217 Very nice audition. Thank you. 9 00:00:29,285 --> 00:00:31,670 Thank you, Mr. Rivera-Perez, 10 00:00:31,754 --> 00:00:34,206 for writing a play as brave as Piñata Man. 11 00:00:34,273 --> 00:00:37,175 A lowly piñata maker who pretends to be as empty 12 00:00:37,243 --> 00:00:39,444 as the toys he makes. 13 00:00:39,512 --> 00:00:42,080 Oh! 14 00:00:42,148 --> 00:00:43,582 Thank you. 15 00:00:43,649 --> 00:00:45,517 Thank you. 16 00:00:48,354 --> 00:00:50,072 Who's next? 17 00:00:50,139 --> 00:00:51,773 You have my headshot, correct? 18 00:00:51,841 --> 00:00:53,742 Uh... 19 00:00:53,810 --> 00:00:55,477 yes. 20 00:00:55,545 --> 00:00:57,412 Excellent. 21 00:00:59,365 --> 00:01:01,666 Forgot to strike my prop. 22 00:01:08,608 --> 00:01:10,559 Then Duper said we were out of paper clips, 23 00:01:10,626 --> 00:01:12,527 so I went to the supply closet, 24 00:01:12,595 --> 00:01:15,130 and guess what your old dad found behind the Post-it? 25 00:01:15,181 --> 00:01:17,215 Had my big audition, and... 26 00:01:18,384 --> 00:01:19,384 ...killed it! 27 00:01:19,452 --> 00:01:20,619 Good for you! That's great! 28 00:01:20,686 --> 00:01:22,771 Hey, I was in the middle of a story! 29 00:01:22,839 --> 00:01:24,506 You found the paper clips. Terrible story. 30 00:01:24,574 --> 00:01:26,224 Anyway, the director liked me so much, 31 00:01:26,292 --> 00:01:28,160 I got a callback for the lead. 32 00:01:28,227 --> 00:01:29,861 It's the role of lifetime. 33 00:01:29,929 --> 00:01:31,763 Much bigger than my voiceover work 34 00:01:31,831 --> 00:01:33,965 on Pac-Man, the Animated Series. 35 00:01:34,033 --> 00:01:35,801 I eat ghosts like you for breakfast! 36 00:01:37,670 --> 00:01:39,237 What do you think you're doing? 37 00:01:39,305 --> 00:01:40,589 That's the big piece. Yeah. So? 38 00:01:40,656 --> 00:01:43,742 The big piece goes to the big dog, AKA me. 39 00:01:43,810 --> 00:01:45,544 And what makes you the big dog? 40 00:01:45,611 --> 00:01:47,212 Um, everything. 41 00:01:47,296 --> 00:01:49,147 I'm smarter than you, I'm stronger than you, 42 00:01:49,215 --> 00:01:50,699 I can wet-nurse better than you. 43 00:01:50,767 --> 00:01:51,833 Easy, girls. 44 00:01:51,884 --> 00:01:53,051 Sorry, Stan. 45 00:01:53,119 --> 00:01:55,303 Anything you can can do, I can do better. 46 00:01:55,371 --> 00:01:56,755 I can do anything better than you. 47 00:01:56,839 --> 00:01:57,989 No, you can't! Yes, I can! 48 00:01:58,057 --> 00:01:59,241 No, you can't. Yes, I can. 49 00:01:59,308 --> 00:02:00,776 ♪ Yes, I can! ♪ 50 00:02:00,843 --> 00:02:02,244 ♪ No, you can't! ♪ 51 00:02:02,311 --> 00:02:03,645 ♪ Yes, I can! ♪ 52 00:02:03,713 --> 00:02:04,880 ♪ No, you can't! ♪ 53 00:02:04,947 --> 00:02:06,181 Enough! 54 00:02:06,249 --> 00:02:08,350 Can't we have one meal without you two 55 00:02:08,417 --> 00:02:10,986 getting into an angry singing contest?! 56 00:02:11,053 --> 00:02:13,472 Why is everything a competition? 57 00:02:13,539 --> 00:02:16,641 Yeah, you guys should just and get it over with. 58 00:02:16,709 --> 00:02:19,461 Clearly, they have repressed sexual feelings for each other 59 00:02:19,529 --> 00:02:21,012 that they're channeling into hostility. 60 00:02:21,080 --> 00:02:22,848 How's that Psych 101 class going? 61 00:02:22,915 --> 00:02:24,149 It's only day three, 62 00:02:24,217 --> 00:02:25,684 but I understand how the whole world works now. 63 00:02:25,751 --> 00:02:28,019 Roger, while you act in your little community theater plays, 64 00:02:28,087 --> 00:02:29,604 do you know where I am? 65 00:02:29,672 --> 00:02:30,906 Jerkin' it? 66 00:02:30,973 --> 00:02:32,507 I'm on undercover CIA missions 67 00:02:32,575 --> 00:02:34,342 acting for an audience of ruthless thugs, 68 00:02:34,410 --> 00:02:35,944 terrorists and assassins. 69 00:02:36,012 --> 00:02:37,979 And if I'm unconvincing or forget a line, 70 00:02:38,047 --> 00:02:39,431 I don't get a bad review. 71 00:02:39,499 --> 00:02:41,032 I get a bullet to the head. 72 00:02:41,100 --> 00:02:42,167 Life-and-death stakes. 73 00:02:42,235 --> 00:02:44,402 That's real acting. 74 00:02:44,470 --> 00:02:46,338 Your a bad ass, Dad. 75 00:02:46,405 --> 00:02:49,407 You guys don't really do that James Bond stuff. 76 00:02:49,475 --> 00:02:51,893 And you, that's enough from you for the night! 77 00:02:51,961 --> 00:02:53,161 It's bedtime. 78 00:02:53,229 --> 00:02:54,729 Go to your room. 79 00:02:54,797 --> 00:02:56,064 Get back here. 80 00:02:56,132 --> 00:02:58,166 Give me a kiss. 81 00:02:58,234 --> 00:02:59,401 You're a good boy. 82 00:02:59,468 --> 00:03:02,137 You just frustrate me. 83 00:03:06,242 --> 00:03:08,844 So, what's on the agenda for tonight's sleepover? 84 00:03:08,911 --> 00:03:11,746 Well, after pizza, we'll retire to my tree house, 85 00:03:11,814 --> 00:03:15,250 watch an '80s crap fest, say Critters or Critters II, 86 00:03:15,318 --> 00:03:17,819 and cap it off with a foray into demon worship, 87 00:03:17,887 --> 00:03:19,204 courtesy of the Ouija board. 88 00:03:19,272 --> 00:03:21,439 No! Last time I summoned a demon, 89 00:03:21,507 --> 00:03:23,341 and now he won't leave me alone. 90 00:03:25,444 --> 00:03:27,229 Delicious! 91 00:03:29,365 --> 00:03:30,866 Oh, wait, wait. 92 00:03:30,933 --> 00:03:32,434 You dorks still have slumber parties? 93 00:03:33,819 --> 00:03:35,687 Look, they're not slumber parties. 94 00:03:35,755 --> 00:03:37,255 I mean, trust me, 95 00:03:37,323 --> 00:03:39,891 when the four of us get together in a bedroom, 96 00:03:39,959 --> 00:03:41,776 there's not much slumbering going on. 97 00:03:47,667 --> 00:03:50,769 Have you ever seen the word piñata, Miss Lopez? 98 00:03:50,836 --> 00:03:53,138 It has that squiggly line over the "ñ" 99 00:03:53,206 --> 00:03:54,873 that looks like an eyebrow. 100 00:03:54,941 --> 00:03:57,459 Or a stain upon the soul. 101 00:03:57,526 --> 00:04:00,879 Oh, rehearsing for your little play audition? 102 00:04:00,947 --> 00:04:03,315 Well, I have a big undercover mission tonight 103 00:04:03,382 --> 00:04:05,133 where I'll be doing some real acting. 104 00:04:05,184 --> 00:04:06,668 No, he doesn't. 105 00:04:06,719 --> 00:04:08,203 He's so lying. 106 00:04:08,271 --> 00:04:13,141 You know, Stanislavski says that acting is the grandest lie. 107 00:04:13,192 --> 00:04:14,576 Oh! 108 00:04:21,234 --> 00:04:22,534 You guys ready? 109 00:04:22,602 --> 00:04:24,869 My mom's picking us up in front any minute. 110 00:04:24,937 --> 00:04:26,504 Yeah, uh, I just remembered. 111 00:04:26,572 --> 00:04:28,974 I got to go get my circumcision touched up. 112 00:04:29,041 --> 00:04:33,361 And... Toshi and I have to get to a taping of Benson. 113 00:04:35,665 --> 00:04:38,333 Wait. You're all bailing on the sleepover 114 00:04:38,401 --> 00:04:40,168 because people made fun of us. 115 00:04:40,236 --> 00:04:42,337 Maybe we are too old for sleepovers. 116 00:04:42,405 --> 00:04:43,888 We're not kids anymore. 117 00:04:43,956 --> 00:04:46,124 There's a person inside Big Bird! 118 00:04:46,192 --> 00:04:47,642 But the best moments 119 00:04:47,710 --> 00:04:49,611 of our lives have been at sleepovers, 120 00:04:49,679 --> 00:04:51,062 remember? 121 00:04:51,147 --> 00:04:52,914 ♪ ♪ 122 00:05:09,298 --> 00:05:11,433 I know we got to grow up sometime, 123 00:05:11,500 --> 00:05:13,168 but damn it, not today. 124 00:05:13,235 --> 00:05:15,870 I say we plan one last sleepover. 125 00:05:15,938 --> 00:05:17,272 Two weeks from today. 126 00:05:17,340 --> 00:05:19,708 The sleepover to end all sleepovers. 127 00:05:19,775 --> 00:05:21,643 Who's with me? 128 00:05:23,312 --> 00:05:24,579 We all... 129 00:05:24,630 --> 00:05:26,548 had a black friend! 130 00:05:48,871 --> 00:05:50,305 Hurry up, people! 131 00:05:50,373 --> 00:05:53,491 The Indonesian drug cartel will be here any minute. 132 00:05:53,559 --> 00:05:55,093 It's almost show time. 133 00:05:55,161 --> 00:05:58,546 Smith, you need to get into wardrobe and makeup. 134 00:06:00,349 --> 00:06:02,617 He really is an actor. 135 00:06:02,685 --> 00:06:04,669 Sir, they're pulling up. 136 00:06:04,737 --> 00:06:05,953 Places, everyone. 137 00:06:06,005 --> 00:06:07,872 ♪ ♪ 138 00:06:07,940 --> 00:06:09,908 Good evening, gentlemen. 139 00:06:09,975 --> 00:06:11,893 Right this way. 140 00:06:15,631 --> 00:06:16,464 That's your cue! 141 00:06:16,532 --> 00:06:19,234 Magic time. 142 00:06:19,301 --> 00:06:21,920 Water? 143 00:06:21,987 --> 00:06:23,955 What did you say? 144 00:06:24,023 --> 00:06:25,123 Water? 145 00:06:25,191 --> 00:06:27,125 You're offering me water, 146 00:06:27,193 --> 00:06:29,260 but somehow I'm not buying 147 00:06:29,328 --> 00:06:31,796 that you are really offering me water. 148 00:06:33,566 --> 00:06:36,034 It's a setup! 149 00:06:41,674 --> 00:06:43,274 What the hell were you thinking?! 150 00:06:43,342 --> 00:06:45,043 Improvising a line?! 151 00:06:45,111 --> 00:06:47,479 There's a reason I never give you lines, Smith. 152 00:06:47,546 --> 00:06:49,431 You can't act! 153 00:06:50,900 --> 00:06:53,918 Stan, don't blame yourself. 154 00:06:53,986 --> 00:06:55,253 Oh, thank you. 155 00:06:55,321 --> 00:06:56,955 That's acting. How cool is this? 156 00:06:57,022 --> 00:06:59,124 He got shot in the back of the head. 157 00:06:59,191 --> 00:07:00,625 Now he's just like a puppet. 158 00:07:00,693 --> 00:07:02,427 Hope he doesn't mind I'm doing this. 159 00:07:02,495 --> 00:07:04,195 'S all right? 'S all right. 160 00:07:04,395 --> 00:07:07,395 == Sync, corrected by elderman == == for www.addic7ed.com == 161 00:07:09,991 --> 00:07:11,992 How'd the big mission go last night? 162 00:07:12,060 --> 00:07:13,711 Uh... fine. 163 00:07:13,778 --> 00:07:15,212 Wa-ter? 164 00:07:15,280 --> 00:07:16,513 Wa-ter? 165 00:07:16,581 --> 00:07:17,748 What are you doing, Roger? 166 00:07:17,816 --> 00:07:18,983 What-what... what am I do... 167 00:07:19,050 --> 00:07:20,918 What am I doing, Stan? Wa-ter? 168 00:07:20,986 --> 00:07:23,687 Well, whatever he's doing, it doesn't sound genuine. 169 00:07:23,738 --> 00:07:26,357 I don't believe he's really offering you water. 170 00:07:26,408 --> 00:07:28,509 All right, I can't act, okay? 171 00:07:28,577 --> 00:07:30,377 You guys should have seen it. 172 00:07:30,445 --> 00:07:34,114 A whole room full of agents killed by Stan's bad acting. 173 00:07:34,182 --> 00:07:35,683 God, it was terrible! 174 00:07:35,750 --> 00:07:37,151 Hilarious! 175 00:07:37,219 --> 00:07:41,405 Big piece for the guy who didn't create 14 widows last night. 176 00:07:44,342 --> 00:07:45,509 You're right. 177 00:07:45,577 --> 00:07:47,077 You're a real actor, I'm not. 178 00:07:47,145 --> 00:07:49,730 I was jealous because I never get the cool parts 179 00:07:49,798 --> 00:07:50,898 in undercover missions. 180 00:07:50,966 --> 00:07:52,700 How did you get to be so good? 181 00:07:52,767 --> 00:07:54,134 I had a great teacher. 182 00:07:54,202 --> 00:07:56,637 You should look him up, tell him I sent you. 183 00:07:56,705 --> 00:07:59,106 "Irwin Beyer, Junior, acting coach." 184 00:07:59,174 --> 00:08:01,141 This-this is you, isn't it? 185 00:08:01,209 --> 00:08:03,277 I'm-I'm gonna get down there, and it's gonna be you. 186 00:08:03,345 --> 00:08:04,945 It's a strong possibility. 187 00:08:07,465 --> 00:08:09,867 And I asked him, "Mr. Antonioni, 188 00:08:09,935 --> 00:08:11,735 how do you direct your actors?" 189 00:08:11,803 --> 00:08:13,637 And he said, "I don't. 190 00:08:13,705 --> 00:08:16,240 "After each take, I simply ask them, 191 00:08:16,308 --> 00:08:17,841 'How did that feel?'" 192 00:08:17,909 --> 00:08:19,343 Ah... Oh... Oh... 193 00:08:19,411 --> 00:08:22,212 Some know. Some... know. 194 00:08:22,280 --> 00:08:24,415 Now, I'm afraid I have some bad news. 195 00:08:24,482 --> 00:08:27,217 I've got a callback next week for the new play, Piñata Man, 196 00:08:27,285 --> 00:08:29,837 and since I'm going to get it, that means no class for a while. 197 00:08:29,904 --> 00:08:31,972 No! No! No! 198 00:08:32,040 --> 00:08:34,408 Log that emotion, save it for a rape scene. 199 00:08:34,476 --> 00:08:36,894 Okay, we still have this week. Let's get to work. 200 00:08:36,961 --> 00:08:39,763 Peter and Bess, you'll be doing a scene from Hamlet. 201 00:08:39,814 --> 00:08:41,782 Jamie and Darryl, you'll do Our Town. 202 00:08:41,850 --> 00:08:44,234 And Stan and Stacey, I'm giving you one of the most 203 00:08:44,302 --> 00:08:46,670 riveting scenes ever put to paper: 204 00:08:46,738 --> 00:08:50,007 WarGames, act two, scene 19. 205 00:08:50,075 --> 00:08:52,443 David and Jennifer, Broderick and Sheedy 206 00:08:52,510 --> 00:08:54,311 are trying to flee Goose Island 207 00:08:54,379 --> 00:08:56,380 to prevent global thermonuclear war. 208 00:08:56,448 --> 00:08:59,616 But David's about to face his own personal war. 209 00:08:59,684 --> 00:09:02,036 Tic, tac, go. 210 00:09:03,305 --> 00:09:04,571 Maybe we can swim for it. 211 00:09:04,639 --> 00:09:07,057 No. No, I can't swim. 212 00:09:07,125 --> 00:09:08,859 You can't swim? No, I can't. 213 00:09:08,927 --> 00:09:11,128 Okay, Wonder Woman? I can't swim. 214 00:09:11,196 --> 00:09:13,380 I always thought there was going to be plenty of time. 215 00:09:13,448 --> 00:09:15,616 I wish I didn't know about any of this, 216 00:09:15,684 --> 00:09:17,284 and tomorrow it would just be over. 217 00:09:17,352 --> 00:09:20,988 Oh, God, I really wanted to learn how to swim. 218 00:09:21,056 --> 00:09:24,158 Somebody remind me to cancel my Ambien prescription. 219 00:09:27,512 --> 00:09:29,596 Okay, Stan, we're going to run this scene 220 00:09:29,664 --> 00:09:31,949 all week until you make it perfect. 221 00:09:32,017 --> 00:09:34,318 The rest of you will get no attention from me, 222 00:09:34,386 --> 00:09:36,353 but there's no refunds, 223 00:09:36,421 --> 00:09:39,473 so... your move. 224 00:09:43,728 --> 00:09:45,262 That's the one. 225 00:09:45,330 --> 00:09:48,032 Those are the pajamas we should wear for our last sleepover. 226 00:09:48,099 --> 00:09:49,416 I don't know. 227 00:09:49,484 --> 00:09:51,085 The striped ones are better for hiding 228 00:09:51,152 --> 00:09:52,836 unwanted pillow fight boners. 229 00:09:54,305 --> 00:09:56,223 No, no kimonos. 230 00:09:57,826 --> 00:10:00,044 I'm sorry, we need to get on the same page here. 231 00:10:00,111 --> 00:10:02,179 Can we think about it? You can. 232 00:10:02,247 --> 00:10:04,448 I can't guarantee that the pajamas 233 00:10:04,516 --> 00:10:06,216 will be here when you return. 234 00:10:06,284 --> 00:10:08,218 Just this morning, there were four other boys 235 00:10:08,286 --> 00:10:10,120 looking at these same very jammies. 236 00:10:10,188 --> 00:10:14,208 They smacked of rich. 237 00:10:14,275 --> 00:10:16,009 Come on, this guy's full of it. 238 00:10:18,630 --> 00:10:21,348 Yo, Deutschland, ring those jammy-jams up, 239 00:10:21,416 --> 00:10:24,201 'cause we like 'em baggy and saggy. 240 00:10:24,269 --> 00:10:25,836 You tell 'em, Lil' Turtle. 241 00:10:25,904 --> 00:10:27,604 And you better hurry up, 'cause Lil' Vince 242 00:10:27,672 --> 00:10:30,707 is throwing a sleepover, and Bindi Irwin is coming. 243 00:10:31,926 --> 00:10:33,277 Bam! 244 00:10:33,344 --> 00:10:36,497 Yeah! Oh, yeah! 245 00:10:36,564 --> 00:10:39,400 Oh, yeah... 246 00:10:42,153 --> 00:10:44,888 I really wanted to learn how to swim. 247 00:10:47,058 --> 00:10:49,293 That was a fake fart, because I couldn't summon up 248 00:10:49,360 --> 00:10:51,745 a real one to express my disgust with your acting. 249 00:10:51,813 --> 00:10:54,114 Oh! 250 00:10:54,182 --> 00:10:55,416 I give up! 251 00:10:55,483 --> 00:10:57,284 I'll never learn how to act. 252 00:10:57,352 --> 00:11:00,504 Stan, you need to make a personal connection 253 00:11:00,572 --> 00:11:02,539 with the character-- and you have one. 254 00:11:02,607 --> 00:11:04,508 Just like David doesn't know how to swim, 255 00:11:04,576 --> 00:11:06,176 you don't know how to act. 256 00:11:07,412 --> 00:11:08,729 Stacey, I want to try 257 00:11:08,797 --> 00:11:09,980 something with Stan. 258 00:11:10,048 --> 00:11:11,148 Go get me a butterscotch. 259 00:11:11,216 --> 00:11:13,050 A butterscotch what? 260 00:11:17,405 --> 00:11:20,140 Stan, we're going to do this again, but this time, 261 00:11:20,208 --> 00:11:23,710 I want you to exchange the word "swim" with the word "act." 262 00:11:25,380 --> 00:11:27,047 Maybe we can swim for it. 263 00:11:27,115 --> 00:11:31,685 No, no. I... 264 00:11:31,753 --> 00:11:32,719 can't act. 265 00:11:35,406 --> 00:11:37,774 You can't act? No, I can't. Okay, Wonder Woman? 266 00:11:37,842 --> 00:11:39,443 I can't act. 267 00:11:39,511 --> 00:11:41,712 I always thought there was going to be plenty of time. 268 00:11:41,779 --> 00:11:43,580 I wish I didn't know about any of this, 269 00:11:43,648 --> 00:11:45,449 and tomorrow it would just be over. 270 00:11:45,517 --> 00:11:49,736 Oh, God... I really wanted to learn how to act. 271 00:11:53,591 --> 00:11:56,910 Oh, Stan! You can act. 272 00:11:56,978 --> 00:12:00,781 Oh, you've made such progress-- such confusing progress! 273 00:12:00,849 --> 00:12:03,167 Okay, let's finish the scene. 274 00:12:03,234 --> 00:12:05,269 Wait, we can't finish the scene-- they kiss. 275 00:12:05,336 --> 00:12:07,054 So? I'm not going to kiss you! 276 00:12:07,121 --> 00:12:08,739 You're... you! 277 00:12:08,806 --> 00:12:11,258 You can't be a great actor unless you commit. 278 00:12:11,326 --> 00:12:12,759 Forget it, I'm not kissing you! 279 00:12:12,827 --> 00:12:15,596 I wasn't sure, so I got butterscotch pudding, 280 00:12:15,663 --> 00:12:18,415 butterscotch candy and butterscotch morsels. 281 00:12:20,018 --> 00:12:22,786 Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. 282 00:12:25,256 --> 00:12:27,274 Pudding man! 283 00:12:32,997 --> 00:12:34,865 Who knows why that didn't work? 284 00:12:37,468 --> 00:12:39,503 Okay, so we're all agreed. 285 00:12:39,571 --> 00:12:41,872 We're going to go with the pepperoni. 286 00:12:41,940 --> 00:12:43,707 Oh, I don't know. 287 00:12:43,775 --> 00:12:46,710 Pepperoni doesn't seem like a last sleepover pizza. 288 00:12:46,778 --> 00:12:48,729 You know, because pepperoni starts out 289 00:12:48,796 --> 00:12:51,381 as one stick and then you have cut it all up. 290 00:12:51,449 --> 00:12:55,202 I fear it sends a message of separation more than unity. 291 00:12:55,270 --> 00:12:56,353 You're killing me! 292 00:12:56,421 --> 00:12:57,838 Don't bite my head off! 293 00:12:57,906 --> 00:13:00,440 Yeah, don't bite his head off! Shut up, Barry! 294 00:13:00,508 --> 00:13:02,676 You're just going to eat all the pizza anyway. 295 00:13:02,744 --> 00:13:05,212 Hey, don't lob factual statements at me 296 00:13:05,280 --> 00:13:06,547 as if they're insults! 297 00:13:06,614 --> 00:13:09,149 Can we all just calm down and pick a pizza? 298 00:13:09,217 --> 00:13:11,385 You mean can you pick a pizza?! 299 00:13:11,452 --> 00:13:13,620 You're the one pushing for a sleepover, 300 00:13:13,688 --> 00:13:16,156 even though we all know we're too old for this crap! 301 00:13:20,962 --> 00:13:24,865 Learn English! Learn... English! 302 00:13:36,344 --> 00:13:39,296 Stop! All of you just stop! 303 00:13:39,364 --> 00:13:40,964 You know what? 304 00:13:41,032 --> 00:13:42,766 I don't think we've outgrown sleepovers. 305 00:13:42,834 --> 00:13:44,868 I think we've outgrown each other. 306 00:13:47,372 --> 00:13:50,374 The all is lost moment! 307 00:13:55,246 --> 00:13:58,849 Atención! I have the cast list. 308 00:13:58,916 --> 00:14:00,684 Now, when they announce me as the lead, 309 00:14:00,752 --> 00:14:03,270 I want you to pop this bottle of champagne and pound it 310 00:14:03,338 --> 00:14:05,639 so you work up the courage to go buy me cocaine. 311 00:14:05,707 --> 00:14:07,124 Ha! I'm going to want to celebrate. 312 00:14:07,191 --> 00:14:08,976 Let's start with the male lead. 313 00:14:10,345 --> 00:14:13,146 A real sparkling talent. 314 00:14:13,214 --> 00:14:15,215 For the role of Piñata Man... 315 00:14:16,384 --> 00:14:18,185 Stan Smith! 316 00:14:18,269 --> 00:14:20,520 What? 317 00:14:24,359 --> 00:14:26,193 I'd like to thank Mr. Rivera-Perez 318 00:14:26,260 --> 00:14:27,928 for giving me a last-minute audition. 319 00:14:27,996 --> 00:14:31,031 I'd also like to thank my acting teacher who unknowingly 320 00:14:31,099 --> 00:14:33,433 trained me to steal this part right out from under him, 321 00:14:33,501 --> 00:14:37,037 making me the better actor and, once again, the big dog. 322 00:14:38,773 --> 00:14:41,575 The all is lost moment! 323 00:14:46,718 --> 00:14:48,452 You don't know what it's like 324 00:14:48,520 --> 00:14:50,838 to taste the pico de gallo of a man's heart. 325 00:14:50,906 --> 00:14:52,339 I know too well, hombre. 326 00:14:52,407 --> 00:14:54,942 Our chips inside us are the same, no? 327 00:14:55,010 --> 00:14:57,211 Lo mismo. Salty. 328 00:14:57,279 --> 00:14:59,480 Salty with tears. 329 00:15:01,099 --> 00:15:02,683 Would the señor and señorita 330 00:15:02,767 --> 00:15:05,119 like hear about the nacho especiale? 331 00:15:05,186 --> 00:15:07,988 Cut! You don't have any lines. 332 00:15:08,056 --> 00:15:10,708 Stop improvising! I need to be heard. 333 00:15:10,775 --> 00:15:13,043 I have 20 people coming to see me. 334 00:15:13,111 --> 00:15:14,845 I'm crushing hard on one of them. 335 00:15:14,913 --> 00:15:17,231 Do you know what that's like, Mr. Rivera-Perez? 336 00:15:17,315 --> 00:15:18,966 You're a gay, amateur director. 337 00:15:19,034 --> 00:15:21,535 You must've crushed hard on someone along the way. 338 00:15:21,603 --> 00:15:24,588 Daniel? Maybe, maybe there was a Daniel in your life? 339 00:15:31,613 --> 00:15:34,898 Yep... don't need anyone else to have a good time. 340 00:15:34,966 --> 00:15:37,868 Just, uh, going to entertain myself. 341 00:15:44,759 --> 00:15:46,076 Oh, hey, ho-- hey! 342 00:15:46,144 --> 00:15:47,745 Hi! Wh-What are you doing here? 343 00:15:47,812 --> 00:15:50,297 We got an e-mail that the sleepover was back on. 344 00:15:50,365 --> 00:15:51,699 I didn't send any e-mail. 345 00:15:51,766 --> 00:15:53,667 I did. 346 00:15:53,735 --> 00:15:54,702 Ronnie? 347 00:15:54,769 --> 00:15:56,403 That's right. 348 00:15:56,471 --> 00:15:59,573 The forgotten fifth member of the sleepover gang. 349 00:15:59,641 --> 00:16:02,810 But you moved to Scottsdale years ago. How did you...? 350 00:16:02,877 --> 00:16:06,714 Let's just say someone sent me an e-mail about what went down. 351 00:16:06,781 --> 00:16:09,083 I understand you guys got in a big fight. 352 00:16:10,518 --> 00:16:12,086 Look, you aren't mad at each other. 353 00:16:12,153 --> 00:16:13,887 You're mad at growing up. 354 00:16:13,955 --> 00:16:15,889 And I'm mad, too. 355 00:16:15,957 --> 00:16:17,691 But we gotta get over it. 356 00:16:17,759 --> 00:16:20,961 Tonight, we gotta... sleepover it. 357 00:16:23,565 --> 00:16:26,183 But first, I suggest you all turn around 358 00:16:26,251 --> 00:16:29,069 so you can see Steve's mom undressing through that window. 359 00:16:29,137 --> 00:16:32,606 Mmm, look at them tig ol' bitties. 360 00:16:33,875 --> 00:16:37,928 ♪ ♪ 361 00:16:37,979 --> 00:16:40,214 Atención, I have terrible news. 362 00:16:40,281 --> 00:16:42,766 Jacinda and her understudy 363 00:16:42,834 --> 00:16:44,768 were both injured in a freak accident. 364 00:16:44,819 --> 00:16:47,121 How are we going to do the show without a leading lady? 365 00:16:47,188 --> 00:16:50,724 Luckily, I met an ingénue today who knows the play by heart. 366 00:16:50,792 --> 00:16:53,460 Everyone meet Cleshawn Montegue. 367 00:16:53,528 --> 00:16:56,180 ♪ Diamonds, diamonds, friends and men ♪ 368 00:16:56,247 --> 00:16:57,614 ♪ Diamonds! ♪ 369 00:16:57,666 --> 00:17:00,701 I can't believe you sabotaged those girls. Really? 370 00:17:00,769 --> 00:17:02,369 Seems like something I would totally do. 371 00:17:02,437 --> 00:17:03,821 Get ready, Stan. 372 00:17:03,888 --> 00:17:05,889 I'm going to to act circles around you out there. 373 00:17:05,957 --> 00:17:07,041 We'll see. 374 00:17:07,108 --> 00:17:09,226 May the best actor win. 375 00:17:09,294 --> 00:17:11,395 This is Sparta! 376 00:17:11,463 --> 00:17:13,664 This is Sparta! 377 00:17:13,732 --> 00:17:16,433 This is Sparta! 378 00:17:16,501 --> 00:17:18,202 This is Sparta. Stop it, Jimmy. 379 00:17:18,269 --> 00:17:19,203 You don't know what we're doing. 380 00:17:21,740 --> 00:17:24,508 ♪ ♪ 381 00:17:29,781 --> 00:17:32,549 Are you the Piñata Man? 382 00:17:34,886 --> 00:17:36,520 Sí. 383 00:17:36,588 --> 00:17:38,822 He waits so long between words. 384 00:17:38,890 --> 00:17:41,141 Because he's good. 385 00:17:57,625 --> 00:17:58,959 Whoa! 386 00:18:03,348 --> 00:18:06,250 Why did I give my heart to a man 387 00:18:06,317 --> 00:18:07,985 who breaks everything he makes? 388 00:18:08,036 --> 00:18:09,903 Everything you make breaks! 389 00:18:12,974 --> 00:18:14,475 Everything I make breaks! 390 00:18:16,127 --> 00:18:18,879 You break and you break and you break and you break! 391 00:18:20,782 --> 00:18:22,349 ♪ 'Cause I be breakin' and makin' ♪ 392 00:18:22,417 --> 00:18:23,700 ♪ And takin' your heart. ♪ 393 00:18:25,386 --> 00:18:26,754 ♪ You been shakin' and fakin' ♪ 394 00:18:26,838 --> 00:18:29,006 ♪ And snakin' from the start. ♪ 395 00:18:29,073 --> 00:18:30,541 ♪ Earthquake, bake cake ♪ 396 00:18:30,608 --> 00:18:31,692 ♪ Flank steak, Ricki Lake. ♪ 397 00:18:31,760 --> 00:18:32,893 What you ladies want?! 398 00:18:32,961 --> 00:18:34,895 Ricki Lake! Fellas?! 399 00:18:34,963 --> 00:18:35,996 Flank steak! 400 00:18:36,064 --> 00:18:37,264 Ricki Lake! 401 00:18:37,332 --> 00:18:38,632 Flank steak! 402 00:18:38,700 --> 00:18:39,867 Ricki Lake! 403 00:18:39,934 --> 00:18:42,252 Flank steak! Out! 404 00:18:46,224 --> 00:18:47,508 Listen to that! 405 00:18:47,575 --> 00:18:49,209 They adore my acting. 406 00:18:49,277 --> 00:18:51,945 Not for long, because next is 407 00:18:52,013 --> 00:18:53,363 a love scene. 408 00:18:54,766 --> 00:18:56,200 You won't be able to kiss me. 409 00:18:56,267 --> 00:18:58,652 The play will go o off the rails, and once and for all, 410 00:18:58,720 --> 00:19:01,321 it will be clear that I'm the better actor. 411 00:19:05,460 --> 00:19:08,796 You... y-you don't know what it's like 412 00:19:08,863 --> 00:19:11,298 to taste the pico de gallo of a man's heart. 413 00:19:11,366 --> 00:19:13,600 I know too well, hombre. 414 00:19:13,668 --> 00:19:15,903 Our chips inside us are the same, no? 415 00:19:15,970 --> 00:19:17,871 Lo mismo. Salty. 416 00:19:17,939 --> 00:19:19,940 Salty with tears. 417 00:19:30,185 --> 00:19:32,619 Hmph! 418 00:19:39,327 --> 00:19:41,295 You call that acting? 419 00:19:45,733 --> 00:19:46,934 This is acting! 420 00:19:49,070 --> 00:19:50,454 That's nothing! 421 00:19:51,689 --> 00:19:52,856 Oh, good Lord. 422 00:20:14,312 --> 00:20:16,830 I'm acting the crap out of you. 423 00:20:16,915 --> 00:20:19,149 Public indecency?! 424 00:20:19,200 --> 00:20:21,368 We weren't really doing it! We were just acting! 425 00:20:24,906 --> 00:20:26,723 You know why they thought we were having sex? 426 00:20:26,791 --> 00:20:29,676 Because our acting was that damn good. 427 00:20:29,744 --> 00:20:32,279 No, because your acting was that damn good. 428 00:20:32,347 --> 00:20:35,032 No, you. You were a very generous scene partner. 429 00:20:35,099 --> 00:20:37,301 Hey, I was just feeding off your amazing energy. 430 00:20:40,188 --> 00:20:41,738 I, I don't get it. 431 00:20:41,806 --> 00:20:43,724 They're friends again? Told ya. 432 00:20:43,808 --> 00:20:46,360 They just needed to . 433 00:20:46,444 --> 00:20:49,512 That night, we had the best sleepover of our lives. 434 00:20:49,564 --> 00:20:51,398 Maybe because we knew it was our last. 435 00:20:51,482 --> 00:20:54,952 In the morning, our childhood would evaporate like a dream, 436 00:20:55,019 --> 00:20:56,904 and we'd head into the dawn of adulthood. 437 00:20:58,522 --> 00:21:01,041 We never figured out which one of us e-mailed Ronnie. 438 00:21:01,125 --> 00:21:03,410 In fact, to this day, I'm pretty sure he was just 439 00:21:03,494 --> 00:21:04,878 some black dude who overheard us 440 00:21:04,963 --> 00:21:06,797 planning our sleepover in the pizza parlor, 441 00:21:06,864 --> 00:21:08,799 but he sure was awesome. 442 00:21:08,866 --> 00:21:10,284 Oh, my God. Look at Ronnie! 443 00:21:10,351 --> 00:21:12,419 You're doing it, Ronnie! 444 00:21:12,487 --> 00:21:13,687 You're doing it. 445 00:21:13,887 --> 00:21:17,387 == Sync, corrected by elderman == == for www.addic7ed.com ==