1 00:00:01,223 --> 00:00:03,229 - Well, I should go. - All right, 2 00:00:03,349 --> 00:00:05,104 I'll tell everybody here that you say hi. 3 00:00:05,224 --> 00:00:06,919 No, don't. I'm mad at them. 4 00:00:07,039 --> 00:00:08,252 Why? What happened? 5 00:00:08,372 --> 00:00:11,635 Not one of them called to congratulate me on our engagement. 6 00:00:12,686 --> 00:00:16,448 That they might be off the hook for, because I didn't tell them. 7 00:00:16,784 --> 00:00:18,122 What? Why not? 8 00:00:18,960 --> 00:00:21,982 I just didn't, you know, want to deal... 9 00:00:22,144 --> 00:00:24,004 Come on, it won't be that bad. 10 00:00:24,815 --> 00:00:26,753 You know what? Here we go. 11 00:00:28,911 --> 00:00:31,582 Everybody, just wanted to make an announcement. 12 00:00:31,702 --> 00:00:33,424 Pam and I are engaged. 13 00:00:33,544 --> 00:00:34,620 Hi, everyone! 14 00:00:35,128 --> 00:00:37,374 - I thought you were already engaged. - Nope. 15 00:00:37,534 --> 00:00:39,872 That was Roy. She was engaged to Roy. 16 00:00:40,037 --> 00:00:43,142 - Thank you, Angela. - I got a gift for Pam and Roy. 17 00:00:43,262 --> 00:00:45,683 - Do I have to get another one? - Yes. 18 00:00:45,803 --> 00:00:47,761 A little close to my engagement there, Tuna. 19 00:00:47,881 --> 00:00:49,886 - What's your game here? - To get married. 20 00:00:50,589 --> 00:00:52,402 She's not a virgin, you know. 21 00:00:53,467 --> 00:00:56,043 - What's going on? - No, nothing. Nothing, Michael. 22 00:00:56,163 --> 00:00:57,328 Just saying hi. 23 00:00:57,647 --> 00:00:59,259 The tall guy got engaged. 24 00:00:59,705 --> 00:01:01,575 - To be married? - Yep. 25 00:01:05,344 --> 00:01:06,366 Sorry. 26 00:01:06,648 --> 00:01:09,114 Subtitles: - Feygnasse Team - 27 00:01:09,274 --> 00:01:10,615 Synch: Collioure 28 00:01:24,922 --> 00:01:27,215 The Office 5x02 - Business Ethics - 29 00:01:29,852 --> 00:01:30,934 Pencils down! 30 00:01:31,054 --> 00:01:32,669 Just kidding. Take your time. 31 00:01:32,789 --> 00:01:34,182 Today is ethics day. 32 00:01:34,383 --> 00:01:37,718 After they finish the quiz, I'm gonna run my first meeting here. 33 00:01:37,838 --> 00:01:39,775 It's gonna be in-sane! 34 00:01:41,545 --> 00:01:44,398 No, it's not. I have to read from the binder. 35 00:01:47,374 --> 00:01:49,032 I got it. I got it. 36 00:01:49,601 --> 00:01:52,853 I took you to an intimate restaurant 37 00:01:53,152 --> 00:01:55,636 Then to a suggestive movie 38 00:01:57,593 --> 00:02:00,399 There's nothing left to talk about 39 00:02:00,519 --> 00:02:02,837 Unless it's horizontally 40 00:02:03,902 --> 00:02:05,856 Let's get ethical, 41 00:02:06,173 --> 00:02:07,180 ethical 42 00:02:07,527 --> 00:02:09,381 I wanna get ethical 43 00:02:10,368 --> 00:02:11,797 Let's get into ethics 44 00:02:12,538 --> 00:02:15,015 Let me hear Dunder Mifflin talk 45 00:02:15,186 --> 00:02:18,451 Your body talk Let me hear your body talk 46 00:02:20,095 --> 00:02:22,732 Why are you helping her? You're not even dating. 47 00:02:22,852 --> 00:02:24,831 She's my friend, and... 48 00:02:25,035 --> 00:02:26,632 ultimately my strategy 49 00:02:26,752 --> 00:02:28,207 is to sort of... 50 00:02:28,448 --> 00:02:31,195 merge this into a relationship 51 00:02:31,512 --> 00:02:33,533 without her even knowing. 52 00:02:34,714 --> 00:02:37,285 OK, let's give it up for Miss... 53 00:02:37,447 --> 00:02:38,674 Holly Flax! 54 00:02:40,377 --> 00:02:41,845 Thanks, Michael. 55 00:02:42,324 --> 00:02:44,748 Today we're gonna have a business ethics seminar, 56 00:02:44,868 --> 00:02:47,173 because recently, without mentioning any names, 57 00:02:47,293 --> 00:02:49,613 there has been some misconduct at corporate. 58 00:02:49,733 --> 00:02:52,466 And we have a very strict ethics policy, 59 00:02:52,628 --> 00:02:55,286 - and that employee has been fired. - Come on! 60 00:02:55,406 --> 00:02:56,756 He's right there. 61 00:02:57,104 --> 00:02:58,428 He was hired. 62 00:02:58,548 --> 00:03:01,163 - Check it out... Hired guy. - Nice. 63 00:03:01,283 --> 00:03:04,436 OK, elephant in the room. Let's talk about it. 64 00:03:04,995 --> 00:03:06,995 Do I regret what I did? 65 00:03:07,744 --> 00:03:08,899 Of course I do. 66 00:03:09,061 --> 00:03:11,751 Even though it was an amazing ride, and I'll give you an example. 67 00:03:11,871 --> 00:03:13,726 Anyone see Survivor, season 6? 68 00:03:14,016 --> 00:03:15,917 Anyone know Joanna on that show? 69 00:03:16,037 --> 00:03:18,096 In New York city, I hooked up with a girl 70 00:03:18,216 --> 00:03:20,204 who looked exactly like that... 71 00:03:20,324 --> 00:03:22,374 Indistinguishable, so... 72 00:03:23,423 --> 00:03:26,672 OK. Well done. Good speech, Ryan. You're a good guy. 73 00:03:26,792 --> 00:03:28,377 Let's start discussing 74 00:03:28,539 --> 00:03:30,587 those questionnaires that you filled in this morning. 75 00:03:30,749 --> 00:03:33,693 "It is wrong to make personal calls during work hours?" 76 00:03:33,813 --> 00:03:36,662 Now some of you marked that you very strongly agree. 77 00:03:36,782 --> 00:03:39,179 But ideally you would've selected "totally agree." 78 00:03:39,341 --> 00:03:41,089 I thought "very strongly agree" 79 00:03:41,209 --> 00:03:43,775 sounded stronger than "totally agree." 80 00:03:43,895 --> 00:03:45,519 Corporate would like to emphasize 81 00:03:45,681 --> 00:03:48,897 that ideally you would all totally agree with that statement. 82 00:03:49,059 --> 00:03:51,192 Well, I think we can all totally agree 83 00:03:51,312 --> 00:03:53,871 that Holly is totally fantastic. 84 00:03:54,419 --> 00:03:55,556 Thank you. 85 00:03:57,308 --> 00:03:59,705 "In fact, spending a half hour at the watercooler 86 00:03:59,825 --> 00:04:02,207 "during work hours is a form of stealing." 87 00:04:02,327 --> 00:04:04,530 - What? - Yes, it's called time theft, 88 00:04:04,650 --> 00:04:06,965 and it's the same as taking money from the company. 89 00:04:07,085 --> 00:04:09,168 Can anyone think of examples of things 90 00:04:09,330 --> 00:04:10,920 that are over-the-line time-wasters? 91 00:04:11,242 --> 00:04:12,393 This meeting. 92 00:04:13,032 --> 00:04:14,577 Can't set them up like that. 93 00:04:14,697 --> 00:04:17,296 Why is it OK for smokers to take breaks all the time? 94 00:04:17,416 --> 00:04:20,052 If I want to go outside and hang out once an hour, 95 00:04:20,172 --> 00:04:22,208 I'll just take up smoking. I'll do it. Don't care. 96 00:04:22,328 --> 00:04:24,808 I'll smoke with you. I got a bag of cigars in my purse. 97 00:04:24,970 --> 00:04:27,582 Stealing office supplies is another big ethical area 98 00:04:27,702 --> 00:04:30,170 that there seems to be some confusion about. 99 00:04:30,500 --> 00:04:31,940 Can we have a moment? 100 00:04:32,102 --> 00:04:33,984 Can I talk to you for a second? 101 00:04:34,146 --> 00:04:37,539 A lot of good stuff, and you look... you look... 102 00:04:37,659 --> 00:04:39,292 - fantastic. - Michael. 103 00:04:39,502 --> 00:04:41,651 What should we be working on while you guys are talking? 104 00:04:41,771 --> 00:04:43,400 Do some... do some work. 105 00:04:44,119 --> 00:04:46,900 People expect a lot from these meetings... 106 00:04:47,184 --> 00:04:49,262 Laughter, sudden twists, 107 00:04:49,382 --> 00:04:50,751 surprise endings. 108 00:04:50,913 --> 00:04:54,922 You need to be Robin Williams and M. Night Shyamalan. 109 00:04:55,084 --> 00:04:56,829 You need to be Robin Shyamalan. 110 00:04:57,002 --> 00:04:58,795 Well, I just have to get through the binder. 111 00:04:58,915 --> 00:05:01,025 - Just... you're kind of losing them. - I am? 112 00:05:01,327 --> 00:05:03,183 Don't think about the stakes. 113 00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:05,228 - It'll freak you out. - OK. 114 00:05:05,761 --> 00:05:08,521 Well, Michael makes a really good point. So... 115 00:05:08,641 --> 00:05:10,729 let's just open this up a little bit. 116 00:05:10,891 --> 00:05:13,273 Say my name is Lauren, and... 117 00:05:13,435 --> 00:05:15,695 here I am shopping in a supermarket, 118 00:05:15,919 --> 00:05:18,779 and I steal a pencil. That's not right. 119 00:05:19,706 --> 00:05:21,823 Lauren, enough with the pencils. 120 00:05:21,985 --> 00:05:24,276 I have to go over pencils and office supplies. 121 00:05:24,396 --> 00:05:27,397 - It's part of the ethics thing. - That isn't ethics. 122 00:05:27,517 --> 00:05:31,044 Ethics is a real discussion of competing conceptions of the good. 123 00:05:31,302 --> 00:05:34,103 This is just the corporate anti-shoplifting rules. 124 00:05:34,223 --> 00:05:35,837 I'll drop an ethics bomb on you. 125 00:05:35,999 --> 00:05:39,219 Would you steal bread to feed your family? 126 00:05:40,318 --> 00:05:41,555 Exactly, Andy. 127 00:05:42,327 --> 00:05:45,138 I took intro to philosophy... twice, no big deal. 128 00:05:45,300 --> 00:05:47,827 It's a trick question. The bread is poisoned. 129 00:05:47,947 --> 00:05:49,726 Also, it's not your real family. 130 00:05:49,846 --> 00:05:52,384 You've been cuckolded by a stronger, smarter male. 131 00:05:52,558 --> 00:05:54,878 No, that's not how it works. 132 00:05:56,291 --> 00:05:57,701 I would not... 133 00:05:58,191 --> 00:05:59,406 steal the bread. 134 00:05:59,526 --> 00:06:02,656 And I would not let my family go hungry. 135 00:06:02,985 --> 00:06:05,325 OK, but we should get back to business. 136 00:06:05,487 --> 00:06:07,294 Have any of you ever faced 137 00:06:07,414 --> 00:06:09,746 any ethical dilemmas in the workplace? 138 00:06:11,137 --> 00:06:12,139 Anybody? 139 00:06:12,309 --> 00:06:15,833 This is a chance for you to say something without any repercussions. 140 00:06:15,953 --> 00:06:16,970 Stanley? 141 00:06:17,090 --> 00:06:18,880 - Oscar, come on. - Pass. 142 00:06:19,500 --> 00:06:20,996 I will go first. 143 00:06:21,255 --> 00:06:24,697 When I discovered Youtube, I didn't work for five days. 144 00:06:24,817 --> 00:06:26,371 I did nothing. 145 00:06:26,968 --> 00:06:29,836 I viewed Cookie Monster sings Chocolate Rain 146 00:06:29,956 --> 00:06:31,338 about 1,000 times. 147 00:06:31,458 --> 00:06:33,206 What was the dilemma? 148 00:06:33,326 --> 00:06:36,042 To tell you or not, and I'm glad I did. 149 00:06:36,162 --> 00:06:39,151 I feel very, very good and "catharctic." 150 00:06:39,495 --> 00:06:42,182 I promise you that you are not going to get into trouble. 151 00:06:42,439 --> 00:06:46,204 You can say anything you want with total and complete immunity. 152 00:06:47,744 --> 00:06:48,994 Come on. Anybody? 153 00:06:49,156 --> 00:06:50,265 Let it fly. 154 00:06:50,385 --> 00:06:52,832 Once in a while, I'll take a long lunch. 155 00:06:52,993 --> 00:06:55,896 - A siesta. - Time thief. Time thief... Fire him. 156 00:06:57,331 --> 00:06:59,755 You've really never stolen any company time? 157 00:07:00,041 --> 00:07:01,060 Never. 158 00:07:01,251 --> 00:07:03,169 You are a thief of joy. 159 00:07:03,397 --> 00:07:04,468 Anybody else? 160 00:07:04,880 --> 00:07:08,180 Sometimes I download pirated music onto my work computer. 161 00:07:08,384 --> 00:07:10,140 Who hasn't? Good. Good! 162 00:07:10,302 --> 00:07:12,566 - What else? - No, I'd like to hear more about that. 163 00:07:12,686 --> 00:07:15,482 I once reported oscar to the I.N.S. 164 00:07:15,761 --> 00:07:18,857 Turns out he's clean, but I'm glad I did it. 165 00:07:19,330 --> 00:07:22,641 - Well, let's keep this party moving on. - I'll go. 166 00:07:22,972 --> 00:07:26,574 Have you guys ever met Bruce Myers, the Scranton rep for Hammermill? 167 00:07:27,931 --> 00:07:30,589 Well, for the past six years, I've been sleeping with him 168 00:07:30,709 --> 00:07:33,125 in exchange for discounts on our supplies 169 00:07:33,245 --> 00:07:34,999 and outback steakhouse gift certificates. 170 00:07:35,638 --> 00:07:36,655 Jackpot. 171 00:07:39,054 --> 00:07:41,271 Meredith, that is serious. 172 00:07:42,548 --> 00:07:45,004 I mean, not only is that a conflict of interest, 173 00:07:45,124 --> 00:07:47,094 but there's also an exchange of goods. 174 00:07:47,535 --> 00:07:48,945 Exchange of steak. 175 00:07:49,282 --> 00:07:51,087 Have you ever had sirloin steak, honey? 176 00:07:51,207 --> 00:07:52,337 That's crazy. 177 00:07:52,537 --> 00:07:54,225 That's crazy talk. 178 00:07:55,975 --> 00:07:59,106 The "Merenator", sleeping with suppliers. 179 00:08:02,649 --> 00:08:04,764 What time we got? You know what? 180 00:08:04,884 --> 00:08:07,094 That's a good place to end it, right there. 181 00:08:07,214 --> 00:08:10,047 This, I think, was a great ethics seminar. 182 00:08:10,167 --> 00:08:13,473 She has given us a lot of wonderful things to think about. 183 00:08:13,593 --> 00:08:14,612 Right, 184 00:08:14,732 --> 00:08:16,127 what is wrong... 185 00:08:16,429 --> 00:08:18,812 Who's to say, really, in the end? 186 00:08:19,061 --> 00:08:21,216 I mean, because it is unknowable, 187 00:08:21,842 --> 00:08:24,892 but let's give her a round of applause. Holly, everybody. 188 00:08:25,668 --> 00:08:27,049 Get back to work. 189 00:08:28,297 --> 00:08:29,299 Great job. 190 00:08:29,935 --> 00:08:31,815 I am truly impressed. 191 00:08:32,397 --> 00:08:35,810 That... You really pulled that one out. Classic, classic meeting. 192 00:08:35,930 --> 00:08:37,094 We should celebrate. 193 00:08:37,214 --> 00:08:40,203 There are some serious issues with Meredith. 194 00:08:40,323 --> 00:08:43,003 I mean, all of you have done things I wouldn't have done myself, 195 00:08:43,123 --> 00:08:45,391 but Meredith's actions are really over the line. 196 00:08:47,009 --> 00:08:48,333 What you gonna do? 197 00:08:54,155 --> 00:08:56,182 So, regarding the supplier, 198 00:08:56,877 --> 00:08:59,966 approximately how many liaisons have there been? 199 00:09:00,086 --> 00:09:02,056 Liaisons? You mean meet-ups? 200 00:09:02,176 --> 00:09:03,243 I don't know. 201 00:09:03,363 --> 00:09:06,010 Once a month for six years, something like that. 202 00:09:06,252 --> 00:09:08,667 Meredith, why don't you tell Holly 203 00:09:08,787 --> 00:09:10,458 it's not what she thinks, 204 00:09:10,578 --> 00:09:12,525 nothing unethical happened, 205 00:09:12,914 --> 00:09:16,065 and that you just like to sleep around. 206 00:09:16,637 --> 00:09:18,144 Am I in trouble here or something? 207 00:09:18,304 --> 00:09:20,938 No. This is just a stupid formality. 208 00:09:21,403 --> 00:09:23,705 No, it's not a formality. 209 00:09:24,356 --> 00:09:26,074 Now, were these... 210 00:09:26,336 --> 00:09:27,412 meet-ups, 211 00:09:27,735 --> 00:09:30,448 just personal, unrelated to business? 212 00:09:30,729 --> 00:09:33,732 No. I wouldn't have done it if it wasn't for the discount paper. 213 00:09:33,852 --> 00:09:35,822 There's not a lot of fruit in those looms. 214 00:09:35,942 --> 00:09:39,331 For the love of god, we're trying to help you, you stupid bag. 215 00:09:39,451 --> 00:09:41,715 What I don't understand is... 216 00:09:42,132 --> 00:09:44,089 why the steak coupons, 217 00:09:44,209 --> 00:09:47,089 I mean, if you were already getting the discounted paper? 218 00:09:47,546 --> 00:09:48,894 Well, it's funny. 219 00:09:49,014 --> 00:09:50,927 Maybe it's a girl thing, but... 220 00:09:51,346 --> 00:09:52,769 after we did it, 221 00:09:52,889 --> 00:09:55,067 when he would give me those coupons, 222 00:09:55,187 --> 00:09:57,516 I just felt good about myself. 223 00:10:02,260 --> 00:10:04,899 What's going on here? I thought I had immunity. 224 00:10:05,059 --> 00:10:08,071 Well, unfortunately, immunity, or something being off the record 225 00:10:08,191 --> 00:10:10,192 does not really exist in the workplace. 226 00:10:10,312 --> 00:10:11,656 I've never heard of anyone 227 00:10:11,816 --> 00:10:14,027 who kept their job after something like this. 228 00:10:14,147 --> 00:10:16,172 Well, I'm not quitting. 229 00:10:28,887 --> 00:10:30,508 Yawn... Four seconds. 230 00:10:32,457 --> 00:10:33,785 What are you doing? 231 00:10:33,905 --> 00:10:36,518 You had said that you don't do anything personal during work time, so... 232 00:10:36,638 --> 00:10:38,109 I'm just making sure. 233 00:10:38,505 --> 00:10:41,279 Wait a minute. So you're gonna time me every time I yawn? 234 00:10:41,590 --> 00:10:43,654 That's absurd. Really? 235 00:10:44,335 --> 00:10:47,900 Hey, look, monkey knows how to use a stopwatch, everybody. 236 00:10:48,062 --> 00:10:49,201 He's ti... 237 00:10:54,407 --> 00:10:56,951 Personal conversation... 17 seconds. 238 00:10:57,386 --> 00:10:59,456 There is no way that that was... 239 00:11:01,048 --> 00:11:02,256 One second. 240 00:11:07,104 --> 00:11:08,504 Holly-lujah. 241 00:11:09,184 --> 00:11:11,382 It's a miracle. You're at your desk. 242 00:11:11,630 --> 00:11:13,379 It's mike-raculous. 243 00:11:14,988 --> 00:11:15,970 Reaching! 244 00:11:16,130 --> 00:11:17,215 You'll get there. 245 00:11:17,335 --> 00:11:19,493 Anyway, I was giving it some thought, 246 00:11:19,613 --> 00:11:21,253 and there's no reason 247 00:11:21,373 --> 00:11:24,305 that two attractive, good-looking... 248 00:11:25,007 --> 00:11:26,748 intelligent, funny, 249 00:11:27,623 --> 00:11:29,709 attractive people can't, 250 00:11:29,971 --> 00:11:33,031 you know, just sit down and work this whole Meredith thing out. 251 00:11:33,151 --> 00:11:34,390 Sounds good. 252 00:11:34,686 --> 00:11:35,614 Good. 253 00:11:36,151 --> 00:11:38,521 Would you care to bang it out over lunch? 254 00:11:38,641 --> 00:11:40,536 I already bought this. 255 00:11:42,527 --> 00:11:43,597 Your food... 256 00:11:43,717 --> 00:11:45,870 is no good here, my lady. 257 00:11:47,376 --> 00:11:48,383 Sorry. 258 00:11:49,181 --> 00:11:50,963 You know what? Let's go out, 259 00:11:51,124 --> 00:11:53,049 Dunder Mifflin's treat. 260 00:11:55,479 --> 00:11:58,139 Actually, you're not a client, so... 261 00:11:58,259 --> 00:11:59,805 we'll just split it? 262 00:12:00,358 --> 00:12:01,380 Ethical. 263 00:12:05,602 --> 00:12:08,691 - So I've gone over corporate policy. - What do you think? 264 00:12:09,468 --> 00:12:11,017 What do you think of this place? 265 00:12:11,137 --> 00:12:12,756 - It's very nice. - Isn't it? 266 00:12:12,876 --> 00:12:14,986 It's kind of business/romantic. 267 00:12:15,989 --> 00:12:17,989 So you're from Des Moines? 268 00:12:18,230 --> 00:12:19,831 That sounds so... 269 00:12:19,951 --> 00:12:20,884 warm. 270 00:12:21,729 --> 00:12:22,793 In summer. 271 00:12:23,829 --> 00:12:26,498 Here too. You know what my favorite season is? 272 00:12:26,738 --> 00:12:28,784 Maybe we should talk about Meredith first. 273 00:12:28,904 --> 00:12:30,814 Yes. Get the boring stuff out of the way. 274 00:12:30,934 --> 00:12:33,898 Autumn was what I was gonna say. When the leaves change. 275 00:12:34,135 --> 00:12:38,176 It's just... I think it's the most contemplative of seasons. 276 00:12:39,080 --> 00:12:41,978 OK, so I've gone over this, and I've thought about it, 277 00:12:42,098 --> 00:12:45,067 and I just don't think there's any way I can write a report 278 00:12:45,187 --> 00:12:47,672 that doesn't end with her being terminated. 279 00:12:48,986 --> 00:12:50,180 Terminator. 280 00:12:52,275 --> 00:12:53,650 I'm from the future. 281 00:12:56,629 --> 00:12:57,780 Hey, Andy. 282 00:12:59,102 --> 00:13:01,908 By any chance, did you see Battlestar Galactica last night? 283 00:13:02,028 --> 00:13:04,400 No, I did not. Is that any good? 284 00:13:04,520 --> 00:13:06,558 Actually not. It is really so-so. 285 00:13:09,299 --> 00:13:11,396 I mean, I like all the crazy monsters and stuff, 286 00:13:11,516 --> 00:13:14,141 you know, like Klingons and Wookies and... 287 00:13:14,803 --> 00:13:16,240 all that, but... 288 00:13:17,713 --> 00:13:20,576 Sorry, was there something you wanted to add, Dwight? 289 00:13:22,795 --> 00:13:25,577 Is that anything like the original Battlestar Galactica? 290 00:13:25,697 --> 00:13:26,975 You know, it's weird. 291 00:13:27,239 --> 00:13:29,581 It's practically a shot-for-shot remake. 292 00:13:29,701 --> 00:13:30,867 Really? 293 00:13:32,784 --> 00:13:34,036 That's cool. 294 00:13:34,156 --> 00:13:35,587 Story's kind of bland. 295 00:13:35,707 --> 00:13:37,875 It's about this guy named Dumbledore Calrissian, 296 00:13:37,995 --> 00:13:41,128 Who needs to return the ring back to Mordor. 297 00:13:41,248 --> 00:13:42,498 It's really... 298 00:13:42,618 --> 00:13:44,285 That doesn't sound right. 299 00:13:45,430 --> 00:13:47,599 I just don't want my employees 300 00:13:47,719 --> 00:13:51,406 thinking that their jobs depend on performance. 301 00:13:51,990 --> 00:13:53,063 I mean... 302 00:13:53,825 --> 00:13:56,634 What sort of place is that to call home? 303 00:13:56,995 --> 00:13:58,830 And Meredith needs this job. 304 00:13:58,950 --> 00:14:00,717 This is her main source of money. 305 00:14:01,075 --> 00:14:03,978 That's very sweet, but we have to follow the protocol. 306 00:14:04,098 --> 00:14:05,431 Those are the rules. 307 00:14:05,591 --> 00:14:08,183 New idea. We don't report at all. We just punish her. 308 00:14:08,344 --> 00:14:09,601 We punish her? 309 00:14:09,762 --> 00:14:11,875 Tell her, can't have sex for 6 months. 310 00:14:12,518 --> 00:14:14,272 I don't think we could enforce that. 311 00:14:14,435 --> 00:14:16,487 I don't know. I saw this thing... 312 00:14:16,607 --> 00:14:19,027 - Like a belt with a key. - A chastity belt. 313 00:14:19,284 --> 00:14:20,891 Yeah, it's more of a... 314 00:14:21,353 --> 00:14:24,119 Underwear garment that has little spikes, 315 00:14:24,239 --> 00:14:26,951 like, made of... I think sometimes they're made of metal. 316 00:14:27,114 --> 00:14:29,007 You know what I'm talking about. 317 00:14:29,127 --> 00:14:31,552 You unlock a little door that... 318 00:14:32,197 --> 00:14:33,135 Down... 319 00:14:34,228 --> 00:14:36,248 Where you... Where you put... 320 00:14:36,368 --> 00:14:38,172 Where you put the... 321 00:14:44,495 --> 00:14:46,696 He has not stopped working 322 00:14:47,385 --> 00:14:48,723 for a second. 323 00:14:49,425 --> 00:14:51,242 At 12:45, he sneezed 324 00:14:52,199 --> 00:14:54,355 while keeping his eyes open, 325 00:14:54,734 --> 00:14:56,940 which I always thought was impossible. 326 00:14:57,434 --> 00:14:59,037 At 1:32, he peed, 327 00:14:59,157 --> 00:15:00,739 and I know that because he did it 328 00:15:00,859 --> 00:15:03,041 in an open soda bottle under the desk 329 00:15:03,161 --> 00:15:05,210 while filling out expense reports. 330 00:15:05,330 --> 00:15:07,655 And on the flip side, I've been so busy watching him 331 00:15:07,775 --> 00:15:09,738 that I haven't even started work. 332 00:15:10,138 --> 00:15:12,886 It's exhausting being this vigilant. 333 00:15:13,839 --> 00:15:15,959 I'll probably have to go home early today. 334 00:15:16,120 --> 00:15:17,427 I am just saying 335 00:15:17,547 --> 00:15:21,548 that I don't think that you understand what I am saying. 336 00:15:21,813 --> 00:15:25,470 No, you are saying that we should sweep it under the carpet, 337 00:15:25,590 --> 00:15:29,067 accept the discount on supplies, not fire Meredith, 338 00:15:29,187 --> 00:15:31,831 and pretend like the whole thing never happened. 339 00:15:32,219 --> 00:15:33,024 Yes. 340 00:15:33,430 --> 00:15:35,789 - What am I saying? - Well... 341 00:15:37,358 --> 00:15:38,648 Busted. I don't... 342 00:15:38,809 --> 00:15:41,977 I'm saying that her behavior is unethical and a little icky, 343 00:15:42,294 --> 00:15:44,491 and I don't think I want to work in an environment 344 00:15:44,611 --> 00:15:46,656 where that sort of conduct is tolerated. 345 00:15:46,817 --> 00:15:49,161 You have to tolerate a lot when you're part of a family. 346 00:15:49,281 --> 00:15:51,953 It's not a family. It's a workplace. 347 00:16:05,774 --> 00:16:08,073 I will be honest with you, that car ride 348 00:16:08,193 --> 00:16:09,742 did not go well. 349 00:16:10,412 --> 00:16:12,495 And that was not my fault. 350 00:16:12,615 --> 00:16:14,797 The only reason I am standing out here right now 351 00:16:14,917 --> 00:16:18,432 is because I don't want to take the elevator with her. 352 00:16:18,918 --> 00:16:21,756 And I am holding on to her leftovers. 353 00:16:35,826 --> 00:16:37,987 19 minutes and 48 seconds. 354 00:16:39,075 --> 00:16:41,252 What were we doing for 19 minutes and 48 seconds? 355 00:16:41,414 --> 00:16:43,093 None of your business. 356 00:16:44,841 --> 00:16:47,129 So I guess I can assume that was... 357 00:16:47,249 --> 00:16:48,325 personal. 358 00:16:54,368 --> 00:16:55,217 Fine. 359 00:16:56,592 --> 00:17:00,365 So maybe you're not completely ethical after all. 360 00:17:01,340 --> 00:17:02,276 Yes... 361 00:17:03,241 --> 00:17:04,493 Maybe I'm not. 362 00:17:23,385 --> 00:17:25,515 It's been a little tense. 363 00:17:26,351 --> 00:17:28,711 People are suspicious of me, 364 00:17:29,350 --> 00:17:32,345 and my best friend in the office won't even talk to me. 365 00:17:32,951 --> 00:17:36,444 Turns out being the morality police does not make you popular. 366 00:17:36,564 --> 00:17:39,381 I should know, because in middle school, I was the hall monitor, 367 00:17:39,501 --> 00:17:42,251 and the kids used to stuff egg salad in my locker. 368 00:17:42,938 --> 00:17:45,506 I was just hoping middle school was over. 369 00:17:51,088 --> 00:17:54,242 Kendall from corporate H.R. is on line 1 and Holly's on her way too. 370 00:17:54,819 --> 00:17:56,870 What's the only thing worse than one H.R. Rep? 371 00:17:57,380 --> 00:17:58,621 Two H.R. Reps. 372 00:17:58,741 --> 00:17:59,832 You get me. 373 00:18:01,583 --> 00:18:02,458 Can I sit? 374 00:18:02,855 --> 00:18:04,236 I don't know. Can you? 375 00:18:06,575 --> 00:18:08,104 Kendall, my main man. 376 00:18:08,224 --> 00:18:10,104 Listen, Holly, Michael, 377 00:18:10,224 --> 00:18:13,212 I just got the report that your branch submitted, and there's a lot of stuff 378 00:18:13,332 --> 00:18:15,284 about a relationship Meredith is having... 379 00:18:15,404 --> 00:18:17,453 Yes, that came out during the ethics seminar. 380 00:18:17,573 --> 00:18:21,199 And let the record show that it was during the immunity part of the seminar. 381 00:18:21,319 --> 00:18:24,188 I'm not sure these circumstances warrant any action. 382 00:18:24,351 --> 00:18:26,495 I think it's pretty clear it was unethical. 383 00:18:26,615 --> 00:18:29,014 From what I can gather, it seems like a gray area. 384 00:18:29,134 --> 00:18:31,352 Look, to be honest, the company's getting a discount 385 00:18:31,472 --> 00:18:33,169 at a tough time in our balance sheet, 386 00:18:33,289 --> 00:18:35,401 I don't know that the right thing to do for the company 387 00:18:35,521 --> 00:18:37,139 is to turn our noses up at that. 388 00:18:37,259 --> 00:18:40,643 Kendall, I understand that the discount is good for the company, 389 00:18:40,763 --> 00:18:43,833 but I'm just not happy about the way we're getting it. 390 00:18:44,896 --> 00:18:47,242 I thought it was clear with you, Holly. 391 00:18:47,362 --> 00:18:49,785 Your task was to get signatures from the employees 392 00:18:49,905 --> 00:18:51,793 showing that they completed the training. 393 00:18:51,913 --> 00:18:52,977 I understand... 394 00:18:53,097 --> 00:18:55,178 Cause every other branch has managed to get those. 395 00:18:55,339 --> 00:18:58,181 If it's not something you can handle, then that's a different discussion. 396 00:18:58,342 --> 00:19:00,348 - No, I can do it. - Good. 397 00:19:06,587 --> 00:19:10,285 How do you tell somebody that you care about deeply, 398 00:19:10,893 --> 00:19:12,429 "I told you so"? 399 00:19:13,538 --> 00:19:15,351 Gently? With a rose? 400 00:19:17,654 --> 00:19:18,981 In a funny way, 401 00:19:19,101 --> 00:19:21,392 like it's a hilarious joke? 402 00:19:23,906 --> 00:19:25,960 Or do you just let it go 403 00:19:26,517 --> 00:19:29,244 because saying it would just make things worse? 404 00:19:31,914 --> 00:19:33,853 Probably the funny way. 405 00:19:34,171 --> 00:19:36,094 Can I have everyone's attention? 406 00:19:37,548 --> 00:19:40,886 Excuse me! May I have everyone's attention, please? 407 00:19:41,230 --> 00:19:43,392 We need to finish the ethics seminar. 408 00:19:43,553 --> 00:19:45,495 - No way, lady. - It's a trap. 409 00:19:45,686 --> 00:19:47,801 Everyone, please, I just need your signatures 410 00:19:47,921 --> 00:19:49,817 to show corporate I gave you the training. 411 00:19:49,978 --> 00:19:52,132 - Don't sign anything. - OK, everybody listen up. 412 00:19:52,252 --> 00:19:54,465 If you are not in that conference room in 2 minutes, 413 00:19:54,585 --> 00:19:55,927 I'm going to kill you. 414 00:19:56,047 --> 00:19:58,992 It's a quarter to 5:00, and I have started to gather my things. 415 00:19:59,153 --> 00:20:02,705 Get in there right now, or I'm gonna lose it! 416 00:20:13,802 --> 00:20:17,284 - Am I getting fired? - Now is really not the time, Meredith. 417 00:20:18,840 --> 00:20:21,016 In this next section, we examine the difference 418 00:20:21,136 --> 00:20:23,712 between sick days and personal days. 419 00:20:23,832 --> 00:20:25,714 Sick days are only to be used 420 00:20:25,834 --> 00:20:28,646 when an illness precludes you from doing your job 421 00:20:28,809 --> 00:20:31,253 or can spread to your coworkers. 422 00:20:31,520 --> 00:20:34,861 Personal days, on the other hand, are much more flexible. 423 00:20:37,554 --> 00:20:39,458 Thank you, Meredith. This was delicious. 424 00:20:39,578 --> 00:20:41,133 Where's the steak sauce? 425 00:20:42,118 --> 00:20:43,422 I think we're out. 426 00:20:43,542 --> 00:20:46,168 I got some in my minivan somewhere. 427 00:20:47,786 --> 00:20:48,917 Wait a second. 428 00:20:49,037 --> 00:20:50,711 How does the steak factor in again? 429 00:20:50,871 --> 00:20:53,088 I think she got it as a tip, 430 00:20:53,208 --> 00:20:55,507 but I don't know why she didn't just take cash. 431 00:20:55,677 --> 00:20:58,227 I don't care what she's doing. I hope she just keeps doing it. 432 00:20:58,347 --> 00:21:00,848 Amen, just keep the ribs coming.