1 00:00:03,873 --> 00:00:09,528 Sync and corrections by n17t01 www.addic7ed.com 2 00:00:11,181 --> 00:00:12,565 Hey. I feel so lucky 3 00:00:12,567 --> 00:00:14,583 we're in the same city for Valentine's Day. 4 00:00:14,585 --> 00:00:16,102 It's like magic. 5 00:00:16,104 --> 00:00:17,987 Or it's like me getting on my hands and knees 6 00:00:17,989 --> 00:00:20,406 and begging my partners to switch a Tuesday for a Thursday. 7 00:00:20,408 --> 00:00:22,158 Alakazam. 8 00:00:22,160 --> 00:00:24,210 By the way, they do need an extra day next week. 9 00:00:24,212 --> 00:00:26,495 And poof, he disappears. 10 00:00:26,497 --> 00:00:27,613 [Snaps] 11 00:00:27,615 --> 00:00:29,415 Hey. 12 00:00:29,417 --> 00:00:30,950 Wanna play hooky today? 13 00:00:30,952 --> 00:00:33,369 Oh, maybe. What do you got in mind? 14 00:00:33,371 --> 00:00:34,787 We can do anything you want. 15 00:00:34,789 --> 00:00:36,622 I really wanna have fun today, 16 00:00:36,624 --> 00:00:39,408 because tomorrow is going to be a nightmare. 17 00:00:39,410 --> 00:00:42,762 Andy's coming back from his stupid, dumb boat trip. 18 00:00:42,764 --> 00:00:45,381 He's been rude, he's been selfish, 19 00:00:45,383 --> 00:00:48,851 I think he's a big jerk, and I'm breaking up with him. 20 00:00:48,853 --> 00:00:53,389 Bam, Andy! How do ya like me now? 21 00:00:53,391 --> 00:00:55,041 I hope as a friend. 22 00:00:55,043 --> 00:00:59,395 Erin says she's gonna break up with Andy, but I'm not sure. 23 00:00:59,397 --> 00:01:01,814 He's coming back tomorrow, and surprise, 24 00:01:01,816 --> 00:01:04,316 today she wants to do whatever I'd like. 25 00:01:04,318 --> 00:01:06,886 You know, when I was a kid we had a dog who got real sick, 26 00:01:06,888 --> 00:01:09,955 and we had to send him to a farm. 27 00:01:09,957 --> 00:01:14,043 And on his last day, we did everything he loved. 28 00:01:14,045 --> 00:01:16,996 [Gasps] 29 00:01:16,998 --> 00:01:18,447 [Chuckles] 30 00:01:18,449 --> 00:01:21,801 Wanna play catch in the parking lot? 31 00:01:21,803 --> 00:01:23,419 - Sure. - Great. 32 00:01:23,421 --> 00:01:27,089 - Get my coat. - Perfect. 33 00:01:27,091 --> 00:01:28,841 [Knocks] [Murmurs] Come in. 34 00:01:28,843 --> 00:01:30,959 Andy, hi, I just made another huge sale 35 00:01:30,961 --> 00:01:32,294 for the company that you manage, 36 00:01:32,296 --> 00:01:34,513 so I need you to authorize that expense report 37 00:01:34,515 --> 00:01:36,682 and sign off on that contract. 38 00:01:36,684 --> 00:01:38,100 I would be happy to. 39 00:01:38,102 --> 00:01:41,103 It would be my pleasure, Mr. Schrute. 40 00:01:41,105 --> 00:01:44,407 Rink-a-dit doo, rika-doot-deet doo, rika-deet-doo. 41 00:01:44,409 --> 00:01:46,158 I really like Andy these days. 42 00:01:46,160 --> 00:01:49,245 He's pretend, and he does exactly as I tell him to. 43 00:01:49,247 --> 00:01:52,648 All that will change when real Andy comes back tomorrow. 44 00:01:52,650 --> 00:01:55,751 Unless he comes back as pretend Dwight. 45 00:01:55,753 --> 00:01:57,002 In which case, 46 00:01:57,004 --> 00:02:01,373 we're in for an epic, confusing showdown. 47 00:02:01,375 --> 00:02:05,461 Andy left a carton of milk in the fridge, 48 00:02:05,463 --> 00:02:07,797 so I've been sneaking a little bit 49 00:02:07,799 --> 00:02:09,998 every day for the last three months. 50 00:02:10,000 --> 00:02:11,667 It's been yummy. 51 00:02:11,669 --> 00:02:15,254 But now Andy's coming back. 52 00:02:15,256 --> 00:02:20,276 So, I guess it's good-bye, chunky lemon milk. 53 00:02:20,278 --> 00:02:23,612 Okay, I'll say it. 54 00:02:23,614 --> 00:02:26,014 I wish Andy had stayed on his trip. 55 00:02:26,016 --> 00:02:30,352 I say we all have one last fun, boss-less day. 56 00:02:30,354 --> 00:02:32,571 Yeah, let's get some booze and some cocaine 57 00:02:32,573 --> 00:02:35,040 and just blow it out, no consequences. 58 00:02:35,042 --> 00:02:36,692 Or the mini-mall. 59 00:02:36,694 --> 00:02:38,360 They have all these Valentine Day deals. 60 00:02:38,362 --> 00:02:40,663 And you get 20% off if you come in 61 00:02:40,665 --> 00:02:42,631 with your husband or your boyfriend. 62 00:02:42,633 --> 00:02:45,033 But I mean, if you don't have one of those, 63 00:02:45,035 --> 00:02:46,602 you can probably just bring 64 00:02:46,604 --> 00:02:49,037 whoever it is you use to kill your loneliness. 65 00:02:49,039 --> 00:02:51,190 Phyll, I'll pretend to be your husband. 66 00:02:51,192 --> 00:02:54,260 I'm already sick of you, so it'll seem realistic. 67 00:02:54,262 --> 00:02:56,479 - Oh... - They have a nail salon there 68 00:02:56,481 --> 00:02:58,347 where I get my feet detailed. 69 00:02:58,349 --> 00:03:00,766 They use a watch repair kit. 70 00:03:00,768 --> 00:03:01,934 Ooh! 71 00:03:01,936 --> 00:03:03,552 I'll be your foot buddy. 72 00:03:03,554 --> 00:03:06,021 Everyone, it is our last day here with no manager. 73 00:03:06,023 --> 00:03:07,523 I say we go to the mini-mall. 74 00:03:07,525 --> 00:03:09,391 Clark, you will be my fake boyfriend 75 00:03:09,393 --> 00:03:12,862 - so I can get the discount. - That's what I do. 76 00:03:12,864 --> 00:03:14,697 Let's do it. 77 00:03:17,000 --> 00:03:18,834 Darryl, everyone seems to be pairing off. 78 00:03:18,836 --> 00:03:20,452 Do you want to pretend to be a couple so we get the... 79 00:03:20,454 --> 00:03:22,588 No. 80 00:03:22,590 --> 00:03:26,175 Yes. Yes. Why wouldn't I? 81 00:03:26,177 --> 00:03:28,744 I wanna pretend to be gay. I got no problem with that. 82 00:03:28,746 --> 00:03:31,246 All right, it'll be easy. Don't be nervous, just follow-- 83 00:03:31,248 --> 00:03:34,249 Stop talking about it. I said I'm fine with it. 84 00:03:34,251 --> 00:03:35,384 These are gross. 85 00:03:35,386 --> 00:03:37,136 They are terrible. 86 00:03:37,138 --> 00:03:39,221 Oh, hey, don't fill up on chocolates. 87 00:03:39,223 --> 00:03:41,524 I made us a lunch reservation at State Street Grill. 88 00:03:41,526 --> 00:03:44,360 Oh, my God. That's so romantic. 89 00:03:44,362 --> 00:03:45,694 It's with Brian and Alyssa. 90 00:03:45,696 --> 00:03:48,263 Oh, my God, that's less romantic. 91 00:03:48,265 --> 00:03:50,983 I know, but we should go. 92 00:03:50,985 --> 00:03:53,736 We need to thank him for, you know, saving my life. 93 00:03:53,738 --> 00:03:58,440 Yeah, yeah, no, totally. That's good. 94 00:03:58,442 --> 00:04:02,411 So should we just get a bottle of wine later and celebrate? 95 00:04:02,413 --> 00:04:03,779 That sounds nice. 96 00:04:03,781 --> 00:04:05,831 I'm very excited to see Brian. 97 00:04:05,833 --> 00:04:07,583 Brian's a great guy, 98 00:04:07,585 --> 00:04:08,834 and Pam and I have gotten really close 99 00:04:08,836 --> 00:04:11,286 to he and his wife Alyssa over the years, and... 100 00:04:11,288 --> 00:04:13,088 he got fired for protecting my wife 101 00:04:13,090 --> 00:04:15,558 from a jerk in the warehouse. 102 00:04:15,560 --> 00:04:20,095 I'm sorry, but you know him. He's a good guy. 103 00:04:20,097 --> 00:04:23,432 Oh, tiny foot lady is back. 104 00:04:23,434 --> 00:04:25,133 Oh... 105 00:04:25,135 --> 00:04:26,569 Oh, get the baby clipper. 106 00:04:26,571 --> 00:04:28,303 [Gasps] Oh, so cute. 107 00:04:28,305 --> 00:04:31,740 [Excited chatter] 108 00:04:33,326 --> 00:04:35,310 You take off your glasses. 109 00:04:35,312 --> 00:04:38,313 Okay. 110 00:04:38,315 --> 00:04:40,749 [Giggles] 111 00:04:40,751 --> 00:04:42,167 What? 112 00:04:42,169 --> 00:04:44,954 Your boyfriend. He look like a pretty girl. 113 00:04:44,956 --> 00:04:48,490 My boyfriend does look like a pretty girl, doesn't he? 114 00:04:48,492 --> 00:04:50,659 Yes, a very little pretty girl. 115 00:04:50,661 --> 00:04:52,678 And you know what? I think you are developing. 116 00:04:52,680 --> 00:04:54,597 We should go and get you a training bra. 117 00:04:54,599 --> 00:04:55,798 [Giggles] 118 00:04:55,800 --> 00:04:56,932 [Laughs] 119 00:04:56,934 --> 00:04:59,668 Oh, you guys both think this is funny? 120 00:04:59,670 --> 00:05:02,838 Well, you know what? No more discount. 121 00:05:02,840 --> 00:05:04,139 - Excuse me! - What? Shush! 122 00:05:04,141 --> 00:05:05,224 Full price. 123 00:05:05,226 --> 00:05:07,726 - We're not together. - Oh, come on. 124 00:05:07,728 --> 00:05:09,812 She's living a lie. 125 00:05:09,814 --> 00:05:13,315 Turns out I can't even be in a pretend relationship. 126 00:05:13,317 --> 00:05:15,350 Hi. We'd like the couples discount 127 00:05:15,352 --> 00:05:16,685 on a pair of foot massages. 128 00:05:16,687 --> 00:05:19,705 No, no discount for two men. 129 00:05:19,707 --> 00:05:21,123 Two men are not a couple. 130 00:05:21,125 --> 00:05:23,909 We are together, romantically. 131 00:05:23,911 --> 00:05:25,377 Two men. 132 00:05:25,379 --> 00:05:28,664 [Speaking korean] 133 00:05:28,666 --> 00:05:32,584 [Scoffs, laughs] Doesn't work. No discount. 134 00:05:32,586 --> 00:05:35,054 Oh, it works. 135 00:05:35,056 --> 00:05:37,923 Him and me, all right, we are crazy in love. 136 00:05:37,925 --> 00:05:40,542 More in love than your small mind can comprehend. 137 00:05:40,544 --> 00:05:43,646 And we have two disposable incomes and no kids, 138 00:05:43,648 --> 00:05:45,648 and we're taking our business elsewhere. 139 00:05:45,650 --> 00:05:47,566 [Softly] Oh... 140 00:05:49,552 --> 00:05:51,570 [Exhales] 141 00:05:56,826 --> 00:05:57,826 - Hey. - Hey, Brian. 142 00:05:57,828 --> 00:05:59,495 Hey. 143 00:05:59,497 --> 00:06:01,113 Sorry we're late. 144 00:06:01,115 --> 00:06:03,666 Oh, uh, no problem. I finished all the bread. 145 00:06:03,668 --> 00:06:05,451 - Oh. - [Laughs] Yeah, okay. 146 00:06:05,453 --> 00:06:06,669 What? 147 00:06:06,671 --> 00:06:08,203 He's on a no-carb thing, supposedly. 148 00:06:08,205 --> 00:06:09,288 Oh. 149 00:06:09,290 --> 00:06:10,622 [Sighs] It's great to see you guys. 150 00:06:10,624 --> 00:06:11,974 Thanks for coming. 151 00:06:11,976 --> 00:06:13,042 - Yeah. - Are you kidding? 152 00:06:13,044 --> 00:06:14,593 Thank you, man, I mean, 153 00:06:14,595 --> 00:06:16,912 I've wanted the opportunity to say thanks for... 154 00:06:16,914 --> 00:06:19,348 everything, and I'm really sorry about the job. 155 00:06:19,350 --> 00:06:20,582 That just seems crazy. 156 00:06:20,584 --> 00:06:22,017 It's fine. What are you gonna do? 157 00:06:22,019 --> 00:06:25,020 But if you guys know of any work, I'm fully available. 158 00:06:25,022 --> 00:06:27,056 Well, my dad can't hear a thing. 159 00:06:27,058 --> 00:06:28,524 You could boom his whole life for him. 160 00:06:28,526 --> 00:06:31,093 That-- okay, great. Does he pay well? 161 00:06:31,095 --> 00:06:33,195 [Laughs] Where's Alyssa? 162 00:06:33,197 --> 00:06:35,314 Uh, yeah. 163 00:06:35,316 --> 00:06:37,933 Um, you know, Alyssa's-- she's not gonna make it today. 164 00:06:37,935 --> 00:06:39,201 Oh. 165 00:06:39,203 --> 00:06:43,322 Actually, we're not gonna make it. 166 00:06:43,324 --> 00:06:46,909 We're splitting up. 167 00:06:46,911 --> 00:06:50,629 I have yet another sales order for you to sign. 168 00:06:50,631 --> 00:06:54,299 Why, thank you, Mr. Schrute. I don't know how you do it. 169 00:06:54,301 --> 00:06:55,584 You're a God. 170 00:06:55,586 --> 00:06:59,505 Rink-a-dink, deet, deet, doo. 171 00:06:59,507 --> 00:07:01,724 Hi, Dwight. 172 00:07:01,726 --> 00:07:03,892 You're back. 173 00:07:03,894 --> 00:07:06,595 And you're disgusting. 174 00:07:10,999 --> 00:07:12,999 Oh, geez, my nails aren't dry yet. 175 00:07:13,000 --> 00:07:15,251 I don't think I can work for at least a couple hours. 176 00:07:15,253 --> 00:07:16,252 - Mm-hmm. 177 00:07:16,254 --> 00:07:17,954 Well, well, well, look who it is. 178 00:07:17,956 --> 00:07:19,321 Andy. 179 00:07:19,323 --> 00:07:21,040 I guess I can cancel my order from zappos.com 180 00:07:21,042 --> 00:07:23,976 because, oh, the loafers have arrived. 181 00:07:23,978 --> 00:07:26,295 - Andy. - Hey! Sweetheart! 182 00:07:26,297 --> 00:07:29,048 I missed you so much. 183 00:07:29,050 --> 00:07:33,936 Yes. Oh. Welcome back, buddy. 184 00:07:33,938 --> 00:07:35,671 I have been dreaming of this moment. 185 00:07:35,673 --> 00:07:38,474 Me too. So much. I'm so happy. 186 00:07:38,476 --> 00:07:41,677 I am really, really bad at breakups. 187 00:07:41,679 --> 00:07:44,630 Technically, I'm still dating my first-grade boyfriend. 188 00:07:44,632 --> 00:07:46,782 I mean, we just had our 20th anniversary. 189 00:07:46,784 --> 00:07:49,235 And I forgot to get him something. 190 00:07:49,237 --> 00:07:51,621 What happened? We thought you were coming back tomorrow. 191 00:07:51,623 --> 00:07:53,856 Well, Valentine's surprise for Erin. 192 00:07:53,858 --> 00:07:55,658 Hello. Super romantic. 193 00:07:55,660 --> 00:07:57,293 And I got you something. 194 00:07:57,295 --> 00:07:59,996 Oh, it's a couple of pieces of bamboo, big deal, right? 195 00:07:59,998 --> 00:08:01,864 No, these are musical instruments. 196 00:08:01,866 --> 00:08:03,799 It's so we can play island music together. 197 00:08:03,801 --> 00:08:05,868 'Cause I have this. 198 00:08:05,870 --> 00:08:08,704 [Rhythmic beat] 199 00:08:08,706 --> 00:08:09,755 Clop the cloppers. 200 00:08:09,757 --> 00:08:11,257 Yeah, clop 'em. [Both playing] 201 00:08:11,259 --> 00:08:14,010 It's called bembe. 202 00:08:14,012 --> 00:08:15,645 ♪ Yoruba yoruba ♪ 203 00:08:15,647 --> 00:08:17,346 ♪ aruba yoruba ♪ 204 00:08:17,348 --> 00:08:19,048 ♪ yoruba yoruba ♪ 205 00:08:19,050 --> 00:08:21,434 ♪ aruba raruba ♪ 206 00:08:21,436 --> 00:08:23,569 Hey, burning man, if it's not selling out too much, 207 00:08:23,571 --> 00:08:25,154 you might wanna throw on a tie. 208 00:08:25,156 --> 00:08:27,189 David Wallace is gonna be here in an hour. 209 00:08:27,191 --> 00:08:29,224 Obviously, that's why I'm here. 210 00:08:29,226 --> 00:08:32,728 I mean, I came back early to surprise Erin. 211 00:08:32,730 --> 00:08:34,747 Happy Valentine's Day, sweetheart. 212 00:08:34,749 --> 00:08:35,915 But I'm just saying 213 00:08:35,917 --> 00:08:36,916 I'm also excited about the Wallace meeting. 214 00:08:36,918 --> 00:08:38,117 Why? 215 00:08:38,119 --> 00:08:39,752 Isn't he just coming in to rip you a new one 216 00:08:39,754 --> 00:08:41,203 for being gone three months? 217 00:08:41,205 --> 00:08:42,672 No, please, come on, Clark. 218 00:08:42,674 --> 00:08:45,841 Wallace knows that he's been gone for the last three months. 219 00:08:45,843 --> 00:08:47,043 Right? 220 00:08:47,045 --> 00:08:49,428 Wallace does know 221 00:08:49,430 --> 00:08:51,080 that you've been gone for the last three months? 222 00:08:51,082 --> 00:08:53,582 I have no idea. I don't know what he knows or doesn't know. 223 00:08:53,584 --> 00:08:55,217 But we've been in touch the whole time. 224 00:08:55,219 --> 00:08:57,687 I mean, it's not hard to get high-speed internet 225 00:08:57,689 --> 00:08:59,388 in Turks and Caicos, people. 226 00:08:59,390 --> 00:09:02,058 It's in every bembe cafe. 227 00:09:02,060 --> 00:09:04,426 He only emailed me four times. 228 00:09:04,428 --> 00:09:06,395 Question. Where's Jim? 229 00:09:06,397 --> 00:09:08,714 He and Pam are having their Valentine's Day lunch. 230 00:09:08,716 --> 00:09:10,399 For two hours, really? 231 00:09:10,401 --> 00:09:12,068 So, you're concerned 232 00:09:12,070 --> 00:09:15,270 about peoples' long absence from their place of work. 233 00:09:15,272 --> 00:09:16,605 If the shoe fits... 234 00:09:16,607 --> 00:09:18,741 ♪ Yoruba yoruba ♪ 235 00:09:18,743 --> 00:09:20,326 ♪ Ruba yoruba ♪ 236 00:09:20,328 --> 00:09:22,444 We were telling two different versions of the same story, 237 00:09:22,446 --> 00:09:25,114 and then everything just went numb. 238 00:09:25,116 --> 00:09:27,116 Well, I mean, that's okay. 239 00:09:27,118 --> 00:09:28,501 It doesn't mean that it's over, right? 240 00:09:28,503 --> 00:09:30,252 I mean, couples fight. 241 00:09:30,254 --> 00:09:31,387 Yeah, and that's the thing. 242 00:09:31,389 --> 00:09:32,722 When we were fighting, 243 00:09:32,724 --> 00:09:34,623 it weirdly felt like the relationship was still alive. 244 00:09:34,625 --> 00:09:36,792 And it wasn't until we stopped fighting 245 00:09:36,794 --> 00:09:41,063 that we realized it was over. 246 00:09:41,065 --> 00:09:44,900 It's over. 247 00:09:44,902 --> 00:09:48,637 I'm sorry, this is-- oh, my God, okay. 248 00:09:48,639 --> 00:09:51,306 We have to stop seeing each other like this. 249 00:09:51,308 --> 00:09:52,975 Uh, we have to find a different way to communicate 250 00:09:52,977 --> 00:09:54,643 other than breaking down in front of each other. 251 00:09:54,645 --> 00:09:58,030 - Yeah. - What? 252 00:09:58,032 --> 00:10:01,250 At least my crying won't get you fired. 253 00:10:04,287 --> 00:10:07,306 Crying? 254 00:10:07,308 --> 00:10:10,593 I notice that you landed the Scranton White Pages account. 255 00:10:10,595 --> 00:10:12,161 That is tremendous. 256 00:10:12,163 --> 00:10:13,429 Thank you. [Chuckles] 257 00:10:13,431 --> 00:10:14,547 And you sold it to Jan, too, I mean... 258 00:10:14,549 --> 00:10:15,965 Yes. [Laughs] 259 00:10:15,967 --> 00:10:18,050 - I'm impressed. [Laughs] - Yeah. 260 00:10:18,052 --> 00:10:21,170 Well, there's one problem. Couldn't help but notice 261 00:10:21,172 --> 00:10:22,337 that you offered a price point 262 00:10:22,339 --> 00:10:23,606 that was not approved by the head office. 263 00:10:23,608 --> 00:10:26,725 So, gotta run that stuff by me, Dwight. 264 00:10:26,727 --> 00:10:28,010 You were on a boat. 265 00:10:28,012 --> 00:10:29,562 I was... 266 00:10:29,564 --> 00:10:32,681 On a boat in the ocean. 267 00:10:32,683 --> 00:10:35,017 Okay, the issue is that you need to run this stuff by me. 268 00:10:35,019 --> 00:10:36,735 Coolio? 269 00:10:36,737 --> 00:10:40,022 Are we coolio? 270 00:10:40,024 --> 00:10:42,074 - Just say the word "coolio." - I'm not gonna say it. 271 00:10:42,076 --> 00:10:43,075 - Say it. - Not a word. 272 00:10:43,077 --> 00:10:44,243 - Coolio. - No. 273 00:10:44,245 --> 00:10:45,828 [Dial tone sounds] 274 00:10:45,830 --> 00:10:46,929 What do you think you're doing? 275 00:10:46,931 --> 00:10:48,581 Just gonna call the Scranton White Pages 276 00:10:48,583 --> 00:10:49,748 - and clear this right up. - Don't you dare, Andy. 277 00:10:49,750 --> 00:10:51,500 [Phone line rings] Hello? 278 00:10:51,502 --> 00:10:53,586 - Oh... - Hey, Jan. Nard Dog here. 279 00:10:53,588 --> 00:10:55,087 Oh, Andy... 280 00:10:55,089 --> 00:10:56,088 I was just looking over the paperwork. 281 00:10:56,090 --> 00:10:58,307 - I found a little hiccup. - Really? 282 00:10:58,309 --> 00:11:00,209 Yeah, it appears my employee offered you a price 283 00:11:00,211 --> 00:11:02,344 that he was not authorized to. 284 00:11:02,346 --> 00:11:03,345 - Hmm. - Coolio. 285 00:11:03,347 --> 00:11:04,880 Seriously? 286 00:11:04,882 --> 00:11:06,682 You're calling me a few weeks after finalizing our contract 287 00:11:06,684 --> 00:11:08,400 to gouge me now for more money? 288 00:11:08,402 --> 00:11:09,602 - Is that what you're doing? - Coolio. I'm coolio. 289 00:11:09,604 --> 00:11:11,103 No, no, no, Jan, I think you misunderstood. 290 00:11:11,105 --> 00:11:12,521 - Yeah. - I'm coolio. 291 00:11:12,523 --> 00:11:13,606 It's-- it's actually just an issue-- 292 00:11:13,608 --> 00:11:15,891 You know what, uh, Nard Dog? 293 00:11:15,893 --> 00:11:18,410 There is an option in the contract 294 00:11:18,412 --> 00:11:21,697 that allows me to back out within 30 days of signing, 295 00:11:21,699 --> 00:11:24,450 so I would like to exercise that option. 296 00:11:24,452 --> 00:11:26,452 No, Jan, please do not listen to this boob! 297 00:11:26,454 --> 00:11:29,371 Remember Clark. He gave you everything. Everything. 298 00:11:29,373 --> 00:11:30,623 Jan, I don't know what he's talking about, but-- 299 00:11:30,625 --> 00:11:32,541 Tell Angela to send me a final invoice. 300 00:11:32,543 --> 00:11:33,542 Uh-- [Click, dial tone] 301 00:11:33,544 --> 00:11:36,962 - Please, Ja-- Ja-- - Ooh... 302 00:11:36,964 --> 00:11:38,247 Oh... 303 00:11:38,249 --> 00:11:41,217 that was not... 304 00:11:41,219 --> 00:11:44,053 how I had hoped that would go. 305 00:11:48,010 --> 00:11:49,677 Hey, everybody. Great job. 306 00:11:49,679 --> 00:11:53,431 Listen, we're a smidge behind on my paychecks. 307 00:11:53,433 --> 00:11:56,601 Yes, well, as you know, we get paid on Fridays. 308 00:11:56,603 --> 00:11:59,520 And you haven't been here for 12 Fridays. 309 00:11:59,522 --> 00:12:01,972 All right. Thank you very much. 310 00:12:01,974 --> 00:12:04,158 Looking good. 311 00:12:04,160 --> 00:12:05,776 Who's that little fella? 312 00:12:05,778 --> 00:12:09,664 It's a bonus check for you from Wallace. 313 00:12:09,666 --> 00:12:12,650 Because the branch exceeded its targets over the past quarter. 314 00:12:12,652 --> 00:12:14,719 - Wow, that's wonderful. - Quarter's three months. 315 00:12:14,721 --> 00:12:16,254 That's how long you've been gone. 316 00:12:16,256 --> 00:12:17,255 - Mm-hmm. - Mm-hmm. 317 00:12:17,257 --> 00:12:18,289 - Mm-hmm. 318 00:12:20,292 --> 00:12:21,375 Mm-hmm. 319 00:12:21,377 --> 00:12:24,545 Thank you. 320 00:12:24,547 --> 00:12:28,850 Great, well, we're all up to speed. 321 00:12:32,337 --> 00:12:34,272 Two seconds of the turd dog, 322 00:12:34,274 --> 00:12:36,674 and he loses the biggest sale this branch has ever seen. 323 00:12:36,676 --> 00:12:38,142 Do you have any idea what I had to do 324 00:12:38,144 --> 00:12:40,278 to get that sale from Jan? 325 00:12:40,280 --> 00:12:41,612 I mean, I went all out. 326 00:12:41,614 --> 00:12:45,199 All out. I mean like everything was out the whole week. 327 00:12:45,201 --> 00:12:47,785 He just waltzes back in here 328 00:12:47,787 --> 00:12:50,071 like he owns the chunky lemon milk. 329 00:12:50,073 --> 00:12:51,489 Who needs him, right? 330 00:12:51,491 --> 00:12:53,357 God, I just don't know what we do. 331 00:12:53,359 --> 00:12:56,127 I mean, short of telling David Wallace 332 00:12:56,129 --> 00:12:58,129 that he was gone for three months... 333 00:12:58,131 --> 00:13:00,264 I'd like to rat out Andy, but unfortunately I have 334 00:13:00,266 --> 00:13:03,417 a bit of a "boy who cried wolf" dynamic with David Wallace. 335 00:13:03,419 --> 00:13:05,869 Except instead of a boy I'm a man, 336 00:13:05,871 --> 00:13:08,973 and instead of a wolf, I cried, 337 00:13:08,975 --> 00:13:12,209 "genetically-engineered monster wolf." 338 00:13:12,211 --> 00:13:15,680 I'm not gonna rat on him. Andy gave me a second chance. 339 00:13:15,682 --> 00:13:18,683 So the least I could do is let somebody else rat on him. 340 00:13:18,685 --> 00:13:20,050 Meredith, why don't you? 341 00:13:20,052 --> 00:13:23,154 Meredith Palmer ain't never been called no narc. 342 00:13:23,156 --> 00:13:25,189 Floozy? Yes. Alkie? Check. 343 00:13:25,191 --> 00:13:27,108 Einstein sarcastically? You bet. 344 00:13:27,110 --> 00:13:29,059 But never no narc. 345 00:13:29,061 --> 00:13:31,445 Vomit mop? Sure. Floor meat? That's me. 346 00:13:31,447 --> 00:13:32,663 - Flesh hoover? Hi. - Hey-- 347 00:13:32,665 --> 00:13:34,782 - Meredith, that's plenty. 348 00:13:34,784 --> 00:13:37,168 All right? That's more than plenty. 349 00:13:37,170 --> 00:13:38,902 Why does no one stop her? 350 00:13:38,904 --> 00:13:41,956 Guys, I know that a lot of people are mad at Andy, 351 00:13:41,958 --> 00:13:43,374 and believe me, I am too. 352 00:13:43,376 --> 00:13:45,293 But he has been through a lot, 353 00:13:45,295 --> 00:13:47,628 and we all used to love him, right? 354 00:13:47,630 --> 00:13:49,747 So, if he's gonna get in trouble, 355 00:13:49,749 --> 00:13:51,132 just let it be his fault, not ours. 356 00:13:51,134 --> 00:13:53,301 I don't want that on my hands. 357 00:13:53,303 --> 00:13:54,635 Fine. [Scoffs] 358 00:13:54,637 --> 00:13:56,971 The state he's in, Wallace will take one look at him 359 00:13:56,973 --> 00:14:00,924 and probably fire him anyway. 360 00:14:00,926 --> 00:14:05,279 What's going on in here, dirty players? 361 00:14:05,281 --> 00:14:07,531 Let's get back to bustin' some paper rhymes. 362 00:14:07,533 --> 00:14:08,899 Come on. 363 00:14:08,901 --> 00:14:11,152 ♪ Who's that girl? ♪ 364 00:14:11,154 --> 00:14:12,870 ♪ Who's that girl? ♪ 365 00:14:12,872 --> 00:14:15,072 It's Andy. 366 00:14:15,074 --> 00:14:17,375 [Chuckles] 367 00:14:17,377 --> 00:14:21,746 All right. [Snaps] Back to work. 368 00:14:25,083 --> 00:14:27,084 Okay, I can tell you're mad at me. 369 00:14:27,086 --> 00:14:31,255 Do you wanna just, um, I don't know, tell me why? 370 00:14:31,257 --> 00:14:34,925 I don't know. 371 00:14:36,795 --> 00:14:39,630 I thought that was a little weird. 372 00:14:39,632 --> 00:14:43,234 You told me Brian got fired for the whole warehouse thing. 373 00:14:43,236 --> 00:14:45,102 And you intentionally left out 374 00:14:45,104 --> 00:14:50,107 a kind of major intimate detail. 375 00:14:50,109 --> 00:14:52,410 I don't know, Pam, I guess I just feel like a chump... 376 00:14:52,412 --> 00:14:55,363 who knows less about his marriage than the sound guy. 377 00:14:55,365 --> 00:14:57,531 I didn't tell you about the crying 378 00:14:57,533 --> 00:15:00,368 because I didn't want you to know how upset I was. 379 00:15:00,370 --> 00:15:02,486 Because it would've stressed you out, 380 00:15:02,488 --> 00:15:05,322 and you're always saying how much you don't want more stress. 381 00:15:05,324 --> 00:15:09,660 Yeah, well, yeah, okay. Well, then thank you. 382 00:15:09,662 --> 00:15:11,796 Thanks to both of you. 383 00:15:11,798 --> 00:15:13,381 - It's not Brian's fault. - No, you're right. 384 00:15:13,383 --> 00:15:15,299 And I'm not mad at Brian. 385 00:15:15,301 --> 00:15:16,634 And to be honest, I probably don't have 386 00:15:16,636 --> 00:15:19,220 any reason to be mad at all because I wasn't there. 387 00:15:19,222 --> 00:15:21,055 So let's just forget about it. 388 00:15:21,057 --> 00:15:24,225 Okay. 389 00:15:24,227 --> 00:15:25,976 [Sighs] 390 00:15:25,978 --> 00:15:27,194 I need you guys to tell me 391 00:15:27,196 --> 00:15:28,696 all the highlights from the last three months 392 00:15:28,698 --> 00:15:30,064 in case David asks. 393 00:15:30,066 --> 00:15:33,851 Just a few things I could sprinkle into conversation. 394 00:15:33,853 --> 00:15:35,903 Any big sales or office gossip? 395 00:15:35,905 --> 00:15:38,856 Well, we had the Scranton White Pages. 396 00:15:38,858 --> 00:15:40,691 Not helpful. Let's stay positive, people. 397 00:15:40,693 --> 00:15:42,860 - Okay? - Hey, guys. 398 00:15:42,862 --> 00:15:44,361 Hey, David, how are ya? 399 00:15:44,363 --> 00:15:46,297 We were just having our weekly round table 400 00:15:46,299 --> 00:15:48,332 where we motivate each other. 401 00:15:48,334 --> 00:15:50,801 I'm not gonna lie-- I get as much out of it as they do. 402 00:15:50,803 --> 00:15:52,420 Sounds great. Don't let me interrupt. 403 00:15:52,422 --> 00:15:54,338 Whatever you guys have been doing this last quarter, 404 00:15:54,340 --> 00:15:56,340 I couldn't be happier with the numbers. 405 00:15:56,342 --> 00:15:58,142 - Thank you. - Well, finish up. 406 00:15:58,144 --> 00:15:59,226 I'm gonna meet with Val 407 00:15:59,228 --> 00:16:00,261 about that warehouse guy you had to let go, 408 00:16:00,263 --> 00:16:01,312 and you and I will talk in 15 minutes? 409 00:16:01,314 --> 00:16:04,315 - Great. - Great job, everybody! 410 00:16:04,317 --> 00:16:06,049 [Quietly] We had to let a warehouse guy go? 411 00:16:06,051 --> 00:16:08,986 You know Pam's mural? Well, Frank-- 412 00:16:08,988 --> 00:16:12,540 Lit the whole thing on fire. It was crazy. 413 00:16:12,542 --> 00:16:13,891 - What? - Yeah. 414 00:16:13,893 --> 00:16:15,326 There was a fire in the warehouse? 415 00:16:15,328 --> 00:16:16,727 The whole thing is in ashes. 416 00:16:16,729 --> 00:16:18,562 Fire department was here. It was in all the papers. 417 00:16:18,564 --> 00:16:19,613 Oh... 418 00:16:19,615 --> 00:16:21,699 This is what I'm talking about. 419 00:16:21,701 --> 00:16:24,168 This would be good to know. All right, what else? 420 00:16:24,170 --> 00:16:26,620 We started selling balloons. 421 00:16:26,622 --> 00:16:27,905 - What? - Yeah. 422 00:16:27,907 --> 00:16:29,874 And, uh, Kathy Ireland signed on 423 00:16:29,876 --> 00:16:31,959 as the official spokesbabe of Dunder Mifflin. 424 00:16:31,961 --> 00:16:33,344 No kidding. 425 00:16:33,346 --> 00:16:34,512 Yeah, in the European billboards, 426 00:16:34,514 --> 00:16:36,013 - she's gonna be topless. - [Chuckles] Wow. 427 00:16:36,015 --> 00:16:38,966 Go, Kathy. She's like 50. 428 00:16:38,968 --> 00:16:41,685 - They're tasteful. - Good, good. What else? 429 00:16:43,910 --> 00:16:45,143 And who knew the balloon game would be so lucrative? 430 00:16:45,161 --> 00:16:47,329 And thank God, right? We needed the income after the fire. 431 00:16:47,363 --> 00:16:49,114 What fire? 432 00:16:49,148 --> 00:16:52,084 The warehouse fire. Weren't you just down there? 433 00:16:52,118 --> 00:16:54,002 It's like burnt to ashes. 434 00:16:54,037 --> 00:16:58,824 It looked fine to me. 435 00:17:00,376 --> 00:17:03,278 I am speaking metaphorically, of course. 436 00:17:03,313 --> 00:17:05,130 You know I have lots of irons 437 00:17:05,164 --> 00:17:07,933 - in the "fire." - Mm-hmm. 438 00:17:07,967 --> 00:17:10,018 Well, that's one of 'em, you know. 439 00:17:10,053 --> 00:17:12,337 Making sure that the warehouse logistics 440 00:17:12,355 --> 00:17:16,441 is a well-oiled, properly-stoked fire. 441 00:17:16,476 --> 00:17:18,343 Okay. 442 00:17:18,378 --> 00:17:21,063 Think you'll agree I explained that pretty well. 443 00:17:21,114 --> 00:17:23,398 - Thanks, Andy. - Thank you. 444 00:17:23,449 --> 00:17:25,951 All right. Everyone. 445 00:17:32,859 --> 00:17:34,793 [Rhythmic sounds] 446 00:17:34,828 --> 00:17:37,362 The fish sounds great. 447 00:17:37,380 --> 00:17:38,864 Yeah, I guess. 448 00:17:38,882 --> 00:17:40,699 Really playing the scales, huh? 449 00:17:40,717 --> 00:17:41,834 Yeah, I don't know, 450 00:17:41,868 --> 00:17:43,585 it just sort of sounds like noise to me now. 451 00:17:43,636 --> 00:17:44,586 You think I need a new fish? 452 00:17:44,637 --> 00:17:45,754 I don't love you anymore. 453 00:17:45,805 --> 00:17:47,372 - What? - I still like you. 454 00:17:47,390 --> 00:17:49,892 But you were gone a really long time, 455 00:17:49,926 --> 00:17:51,977 and you didn't really email me all that much. 456 00:17:52,011 --> 00:17:55,430 You re-tweeted me a lot, to be fair. 457 00:17:55,481 --> 00:17:57,099 But I don't love you. 458 00:17:57,150 --> 00:17:58,851 Okay, I get it. 459 00:17:58,885 --> 00:18:01,186 You're unhappy. I've been gone a long time, 460 00:18:01,220 --> 00:18:03,054 and we lost a little bit of juju, 461 00:18:03,072 --> 00:18:04,940 but you and me, we have a future. 462 00:18:04,991 --> 00:18:06,892 There is a lot of love here. 463 00:18:06,910 --> 00:18:08,660 I just said there isn't love. 464 00:18:08,695 --> 00:18:10,696 On your side. 465 00:18:10,730 --> 00:18:14,032 But there's tons on my side. It's gushing. 466 00:18:14,066 --> 00:18:15,534 We're just outta sync right now. 467 00:18:15,568 --> 00:18:17,669 But that's just timing, and what's timing? 468 00:18:17,704 --> 00:18:20,339 I mean, my parents lasted 30, 40 years. 469 00:18:20,373 --> 00:18:22,124 They were never happy at the same time. 470 00:18:22,175 --> 00:18:23,792 I guess. 471 00:18:23,843 --> 00:18:25,210 I mean, what do we have left? 472 00:18:25,244 --> 00:18:28,630 35, maybe 40 years, if we're lucky? 473 00:18:28,681 --> 00:18:30,415 I mean, I have spent a lot of time in the sun. 474 00:18:30,433 --> 00:18:31,750 You got really sunburned. 475 00:18:31,768 --> 00:18:33,802 I'm gonna be a prune in like three years. 476 00:18:33,853 --> 00:18:35,220 Ugh... 477 00:18:35,254 --> 00:18:38,140 I know you may not be feeling love for me right now, 478 00:18:38,191 --> 00:18:39,858 but if you fake it, 479 00:18:39,893 --> 00:18:42,394 I won't be able to tell the difference. 480 00:18:42,428 --> 00:18:43,645 So I'll feel good. 481 00:18:43,696 --> 00:18:45,864 And then eventually, maybe, 482 00:18:45,899 --> 00:18:48,367 you'll actually start to love me again. 483 00:18:48,401 --> 00:18:50,152 You really think we can get that back? 484 00:18:50,203 --> 00:18:52,437 Yes. 485 00:18:53,957 --> 00:18:56,491 Come on. 486 00:18:56,542 --> 00:18:58,877 Totally. 487 00:19:05,635 --> 00:19:06,952 You know what? 488 00:19:06,970 --> 00:19:09,721 Maybe we should cancel that bottle of wine tonight. 489 00:19:09,756 --> 00:19:11,122 Oh? 490 00:19:11,140 --> 00:19:12,507 Yeah, I just feel like 491 00:19:12,558 --> 00:19:14,309 I got a bunch of stuff to do in Philly, 492 00:19:14,344 --> 00:19:17,729 and I'm sure you have stuff to do, so we can just... 493 00:19:17,764 --> 00:19:20,799 Drop me at the bus station? 494 00:19:20,817 --> 00:19:22,067 Are you sure? 495 00:19:22,101 --> 00:19:24,236 I just feel like we're gonna fight. 496 00:19:24,270 --> 00:19:25,938 Yeah. 497 00:19:25,972 --> 00:19:28,407 So... 498 00:19:28,441 --> 00:19:29,608 how 'bout let's not? 499 00:19:29,642 --> 00:19:32,477 Okay. 500 00:19:34,330 --> 00:19:38,951 Oh, um... 501 00:19:38,985 --> 00:19:41,620 happy Valentine's Day. 502 00:19:41,654 --> 00:19:46,658 Sorry. I didn't have time to wrap it. 503 00:19:48,511 --> 00:19:51,630 Wow. I didn't know you kept this. 504 00:19:51,664 --> 00:19:53,799 - Yeah. Yeah. - Thank you. 505 00:19:53,833 --> 00:19:56,835 No problem. 506 00:20:00,273 --> 00:20:02,891 I don't think you should go to Philly tonight. 507 00:20:02,942 --> 00:20:06,611 I think that you should stay, and I think we should fight. 508 00:20:06,646 --> 00:20:09,948 You really want to fight on Valentine's Day? 509 00:20:09,983 --> 00:20:12,284 Yeah, I do. 510 00:20:15,788 --> 00:20:17,739 Okay. 511 00:20:17,790 --> 00:20:19,825 All right, put your dukes up, Beesly. 512 00:20:23,880 --> 00:20:25,414 Hi. 513 00:20:25,465 --> 00:20:28,583 Hey, you okay? 514 00:20:28,634 --> 00:20:32,004 I couldn't do it. 515 00:20:32,038 --> 00:20:33,705 Oh. 516 00:20:33,723 --> 00:20:35,474 I'm sorry. 517 00:20:35,508 --> 00:20:37,092 Oh, you don't have to apologize. 518 00:20:37,143 --> 00:20:41,847 I just-- I just want you to be happy, okay? 519 00:20:51,824 --> 00:20:54,359 [Chuckles] 520 00:20:59,198 --> 00:21:01,232 We're breaking up. 521 00:21:03,235 --> 00:21:05,003 And just so you know, 522 00:21:05,038 --> 00:21:07,005 I was worried that you were dead. 523 00:21:07,040 --> 00:21:10,592 You were gone for three months. 524 00:21:12,745 --> 00:21:17,015 Andy? David. Still here. 525 00:21:17,050 --> 00:21:20,032 What was that about three months? 526 00:21:22,260 --> 00:21:25,758 Sync and corrections by n17t01 www.addic7ed.com