1 00:00:01,807 --> 00:00:06,311 Oh, for God's sake. 2 00:00:06,345 --> 00:00:09,114 "Planking" is a very stupid and dangerous trend. 3 00:00:09,148 --> 00:00:11,483 Basically you lie like a plank in weird places. 4 00:00:11,517 --> 00:00:12,717 That's it. 5 00:00:12,752 --> 00:00:14,519 Sometimes you get run over. 6 00:00:14,553 --> 00:00:16,588 Welcome to the Internet. 7 00:00:16,622 --> 00:00:18,606 Planking is one of those things where, 8 00:00:18,657 --> 00:00:21,593 hey, you either get it or you don't. 9 00:00:21,627 --> 00:00:23,595 And I don't. 10 00:00:23,629 --> 00:00:26,131 But I am so excited to be a part of it. 11 00:00:29,234 --> 00:00:31,036 - After you, my good sir. - No, I insist. 12 00:00:31,070 --> 00:00:33,288 The search committee finally decided 13 00:00:33,339 --> 00:00:35,273 after a lot of deliberation 14 00:00:35,307 --> 00:00:38,426 on Robert California for the manager position... 15 00:00:38,461 --> 00:00:41,930 Who took one look around 16 00:00:41,964 --> 00:00:43,348 and left. 17 00:00:43,382 --> 00:00:46,351 He drove down to Florida and convinced Jo 18 00:00:46,385 --> 00:00:49,854 to make him CEO. 19 00:00:49,889 --> 00:00:51,089 CEO... 20 00:00:51,123 --> 00:00:53,224 Her own job. 21 00:00:53,259 --> 00:00:54,659 He talked her out of her own job 22 00:00:54,693 --> 00:00:56,277 and I don't really know how someone does that. 23 00:00:56,312 --> 00:01:00,799 But, anyway, then the position was his to fill 24 00:01:00,833 --> 00:01:02,317 and he chose... 25 00:01:07,640 --> 00:01:10,141 It's unbelievable. 26 00:01:10,176 --> 00:01:12,443 True, I might have been the second choice, 27 00:01:12,461 --> 00:01:14,829 but I was the first choice's first choice. 28 00:01:14,880 --> 00:01:17,449 And, about Dwight, I sense that he might 29 00:01:17,483 --> 00:01:19,250 have some resentment about not getting the job. 30 00:01:19,285 --> 00:01:20,552 So I sat him down and we had a talk. 31 00:01:20,586 --> 00:01:22,821 And I told him, "I need a really strong number two. 32 00:01:22,855 --> 00:01:25,123 I want you to be my enforcer." 33 00:01:25,141 --> 00:01:28,343 Smart, right? Very smart. 34 00:01:29,829 --> 00:01:32,464 - This has got to stop. - I can't get down. 35 00:01:32,498 --> 00:01:36,017 Ke-- Kevin! 36 00:01:36,068 --> 00:01:38,770 Yeah, at first I was really disappointed. 37 00:01:38,804 --> 00:01:42,373 But I've got a great daily routine going right now. 38 00:01:42,408 --> 00:01:44,676 I've upped my karate to eight times a week. 39 00:01:44,710 --> 00:01:46,361 I've added boxing, lunches and on weekends. 40 00:01:46,412 --> 00:01:47,829 I do kickboxing three times a week, 41 00:01:47,863 --> 00:01:49,330 krav maga four times a week, 42 00:01:49,365 --> 00:01:51,916 an hour of meditation every morning at sunrise, 43 00:01:51,951 --> 00:01:53,551 and again at sunset. 44 00:01:53,586 --> 00:01:57,322 So yeah... I'm doing great. 45 00:01:57,356 --> 00:01:58,756 Okay, I'm going to need some help. Pam? 46 00:01:58,791 --> 00:02:01,926 I don't think I should. 47 00:02:01,961 --> 00:02:04,095 Oh, yeah, pregnant. 48 00:02:04,130 --> 00:02:05,964 Right here. Little Michael Scott. 49 00:02:05,998 --> 00:02:08,433 Nope. I told you I don't like that joke. 50 00:02:08,467 --> 00:02:10,301 It is a boy-- We found out early. 51 00:02:10,336 --> 00:02:12,837 Much different the second time around. 52 00:02:12,872 --> 00:02:14,806 And I have to say, it is nice 53 00:02:14,840 --> 00:02:18,109 not being the only pregnant woman in the office. 54 00:02:18,144 --> 00:02:22,013 Look! It's, uh, little pregs and big pregs. 55 00:02:22,031 --> 00:02:23,398 Wait, when did we start calling... 56 00:02:23,449 --> 00:02:26,050 Isn't it amazing, the difference in our sizes? 57 00:02:26,085 --> 00:02:28,219 Well, I am a few months ahead of you. 58 00:02:28,254 --> 00:02:31,022 I'm having a child with my husband the senator, 59 00:02:31,040 --> 00:02:34,359 and Pam is having a child with Jim... 60 00:02:34,393 --> 00:02:35,960 The great salesman. 61 00:02:35,995 --> 00:02:37,879 Hoist him aloft! 62 00:02:37,913 --> 00:02:39,297 Come on, Darryl! 63 00:02:39,331 --> 00:02:40,865 Lift, lift, Darryl. Yeah, come on, man... 64 00:02:40,883 --> 00:02:42,533 Yeah, I wanted the manager job, 65 00:02:42,551 --> 00:02:46,905 but I got something much better... 66 00:02:46,939 --> 00:02:48,806 This soda. 67 00:02:48,841 --> 00:02:51,226 This is mine. 68 00:02:51,260 --> 00:02:54,095 It might be easier if you take a deep breath, 69 00:02:54,146 --> 00:02:56,931 lift from the knees, and shove it up your butt. 70 00:02:59,351 --> 00:03:00,852 I came up with a new thing this summer. 71 00:03:00,886 --> 00:03:03,254 I act like I'm telling someone how to do something. 72 00:03:03,289 --> 00:03:05,623 I go on with a long description 73 00:03:05,658 --> 00:03:08,493 and then I say, "and shove it up your butt!" 74 00:03:10,729 --> 00:03:13,998 It's stupid, but it's my thing now. 75 00:03:14,033 --> 00:03:16,000 No one should be planking at all. 76 00:03:16,035 --> 00:03:18,903 Thank you. Yes. 77 00:03:18,921 --> 00:03:20,672 Dwight, my enforcer, my number two, 78 00:03:20,706 --> 00:03:22,073 can you take care of this? 79 00:03:22,091 --> 00:03:24,792 Say no more. 80 00:03:34,270 --> 00:03:36,420 Kids, don't try planking. 81 00:03:36,438 --> 00:03:38,890 It's dangerous. 82 00:03:38,924 --> 00:03:42,143 Especially with me around. 83 00:03:49,271 --> 00:03:54,029 Sync and corrections by n17t01 www.addic7ed.com 84 00:04:04,750 --> 00:04:07,518 ♪ Trouble ♪ 85 00:04:07,553 --> 00:04:11,306 ♪ Trouble, trouble, trouble, trouble... ♪ 86 00:04:11,340 --> 00:04:15,093 Are you watching that commercial again? 87 00:04:15,127 --> 00:04:16,561 Why do you keep watching it 88 00:04:16,595 --> 00:04:18,396 if you know it's just going to make you cry? 89 00:04:18,430 --> 00:04:19,964 Because everything makes me cry, 90 00:04:19,999 --> 00:04:22,183 so what's the difference? 91 00:04:22,234 --> 00:04:23,968 And this dog... 92 00:04:23,986 --> 00:04:26,404 He just wants to protect his bone. 93 00:04:26,438 --> 00:04:28,472 He's got a bank vault, that's a start. 94 00:04:28,490 --> 00:04:29,507 Not enough, though. 95 00:04:29,541 --> 00:04:31,676 All right. 96 00:04:36,315 --> 00:04:38,249 The new CEO works out of the conference room 97 00:04:38,284 --> 00:04:39,350 about half the time. 98 00:04:39,385 --> 00:04:40,918 But whenever he takes a break, 99 00:04:40,953 --> 00:04:43,421 he does these weird walks around the office. 100 00:04:43,455 --> 00:04:45,823 And you never know who he's going to zero in on 101 00:04:45,858 --> 00:04:48,042 for these really intense small talks. 102 00:04:48,093 --> 00:04:51,012 You just hope it's not you. 103 00:04:51,046 --> 00:04:52,664 And yet you hope it is you too. 104 00:04:52,698 --> 00:04:54,866 It's strange. 105 00:05:01,407 --> 00:05:02,607 Here we go. 106 00:05:02,641 --> 00:05:04,742 - Hello. - Robert California. 107 00:05:04,777 --> 00:05:06,377 Let's have a conversation. 108 00:05:06,412 --> 00:05:08,363 Describe your day so far. 109 00:05:08,397 --> 00:05:10,114 Well, I woke up, and-- 110 00:05:10,149 --> 00:05:11,482 Erin, when you recount your day, 111 00:05:11,516 --> 00:05:13,951 never say you woke up, it's a waste of your time. 112 00:05:13,986 --> 00:05:15,286 That's how every day has begun 113 00:05:15,321 --> 00:05:16,921 for everyone since the dawn of man. 114 00:05:16,955 --> 00:05:19,957 Very smart. Very smart. 115 00:05:19,992 --> 00:05:23,961 Suddenly... I was awake. 116 00:05:23,996 --> 00:05:26,130 And I have a new thing-- - Hey, Robert. 117 00:05:26,165 --> 00:05:30,251 We have that 9:30 A.M. casual chitchat scheduled. 118 00:05:30,302 --> 00:05:32,136 I emailed you about it last night to confirm. 119 00:05:32,171 --> 00:05:33,921 And again this morning. 120 00:05:33,972 --> 00:05:36,007 First item on the agenda-- Can I get everyone 121 00:05:36,041 --> 00:05:37,975 an extra long Columbus day weekend? 122 00:05:38,010 --> 00:05:41,012 Item number two-- Connect with the guy. 123 00:05:41,046 --> 00:05:43,481 Robert California-- What does he think of me? 124 00:05:43,515 --> 00:05:46,317 Don't know. Super care. 125 00:05:46,352 --> 00:05:49,087 Number three, time permitting, we lost our biggest client. 126 00:05:51,156 --> 00:05:54,359 Uh, nope, I actually have that on last month's order. 127 00:05:54,393 --> 00:05:58,112 Oh, sure. Yeah. 128 00:05:58,163 --> 00:06:01,999 Yeah on that. 129 00:06:02,034 --> 00:06:03,418 Pam! Pam! Psst! 130 00:06:03,452 --> 00:06:04,735 Pam! 131 00:06:04,753 --> 00:06:09,757 Come here. 132 00:06:16,598 --> 00:06:20,284 - Look... - Jim! 133 00:06:29,445 --> 00:06:32,280 Can I call you right back? 134 00:06:32,314 --> 00:06:33,531 Thank you very much. 135 00:06:33,565 --> 00:06:36,934 Okay. 136 00:06:39,371 --> 00:06:40,705 What is this? 137 00:06:43,292 --> 00:06:45,960 The Friday before Columbus day-- Thoughts? 138 00:06:45,994 --> 00:06:47,145 What are your thoughts? 139 00:06:47,179 --> 00:06:49,614 Just making chitchat. 140 00:06:49,648 --> 00:06:52,834 Kind of a medium year for women's soccer, no? 141 00:06:54,136 --> 00:06:55,303 See? I think that... 142 00:06:55,337 --> 00:06:57,054 What are you looking at? 143 00:06:57,089 --> 00:06:58,489 It's-- it's nothing. 144 00:06:58,524 --> 00:07:01,459 - Can't be nothing. - Yeah, it can't be nothing. 145 00:07:01,477 --> 00:07:02,977 It's just a list of our names 146 00:07:03,011 --> 00:07:04,846 split into two columns. What? 147 00:07:04,897 --> 00:07:07,231 Okay, just wait one second, all right? 148 00:07:07,266 --> 00:07:08,399 I will copy it. 149 00:07:08,434 --> 00:07:09,700 Do you have a pen? 150 00:07:09,735 --> 00:07:11,152 - No. - No. 151 00:07:11,186 --> 00:07:14,972 Okay. Um, I'll take a photo of it. 152 00:07:15,007 --> 00:07:16,157 Dwight, can you throw me my phone? 153 00:07:20,078 --> 00:07:21,696 Nice catch. 154 00:07:21,747 --> 00:07:23,865 If he comes out, distract him. 155 00:07:23,916 --> 00:07:26,000 We need a warning signal. 156 00:07:26,034 --> 00:07:27,752 We don't need a warning signal, Kevin. 157 00:07:27,786 --> 00:07:29,086 I can see him right there. We do! 158 00:07:29,121 --> 00:07:31,205 - I promise you, we don't need-- - Warning! Warning! 159 00:07:31,256 --> 00:07:33,341 Warning! Warning! 160 00:07:33,375 --> 00:07:35,176 Phyllis! 161 00:07:35,210 --> 00:07:39,213 - Oh. - You okay? 162 00:07:39,264 --> 00:07:40,932 Here, watch your neck. 163 00:07:40,966 --> 00:07:42,216 - You okay? - Yeah, yeah. Oh! 164 00:07:43,769 --> 00:07:44,869 Thanks, guys. 165 00:07:44,903 --> 00:07:46,837 Wow. 166 00:07:48,073 --> 00:07:49,840 Okay. 167 00:07:49,858 --> 00:07:51,609 What side of the list am I on? 168 00:07:51,643 --> 00:07:53,778 - Left. - Yes! 169 00:07:53,812 --> 00:07:56,080 Why are you-- How do you know-- 170 00:07:57,366 --> 00:08:00,184 Really great list of names, guys. 171 00:08:00,219 --> 00:08:01,853 Thank you so much. Good work. 172 00:08:01,887 --> 00:08:04,622 Uh, no. Actually, that was in Robert's notebook. 173 00:08:04,656 --> 00:08:06,724 He left it at reception and we photocopied it. 174 00:08:06,758 --> 00:08:09,660 O-oo-kay. 175 00:08:09,695 --> 00:08:11,295 I don't want any part of this. 176 00:08:11,330 --> 00:08:13,698 Maybe it's a list of people he's going to fire. 177 00:08:13,732 --> 00:08:16,884 Okay, it's not that, Pam. 178 00:08:16,919 --> 00:08:18,302 You know, I was thinking it reminds me 179 00:08:18,337 --> 00:08:20,104 of those lists Dwight used to make. 180 00:08:20,138 --> 00:08:22,039 This is if we were all on a cruise ship 181 00:08:22,074 --> 00:08:23,808 and had to divide into lifeboats. 182 00:08:23,842 --> 00:08:25,042 And this is if we were on a cruise ship 183 00:08:25,077 --> 00:08:27,211 and had to divide into life rafts. 184 00:08:27,246 --> 00:08:29,096 Here's something. 185 00:08:29,147 --> 00:08:33,951 Who would eat who in alive situation. 186 00:08:33,986 --> 00:08:37,221 No. That can't be it. 187 00:08:37,256 --> 00:08:39,457 I got to say, kind of seems like 188 00:08:39,491 --> 00:08:41,659 the left side's the side to be on-- 189 00:08:41,693 --> 00:08:44,495 me, Jim, Dwight, Darryl. No offense, Pam. 190 00:08:44,530 --> 00:08:45,730 - No, I don't think so. - Excuse me? 191 00:08:45,764 --> 00:08:46,948 Shh! Pam, come on. 192 00:08:46,999 --> 00:08:48,299 Don't be such a right-sider. 193 00:08:50,168 --> 00:08:52,253 - Did you guys figure it out? - We couldn't crack it. 194 00:08:52,287 --> 00:08:55,072 Go in there and just ask the man what it means. 195 00:08:55,090 --> 00:08:58,643 He'll know that we looked at his private notebook. 196 00:08:58,677 --> 00:09:01,846 Come on, just say you saw the list by accident. 197 00:09:01,880 --> 00:09:04,348 I'm already working on this Columbus day thing for you guys. 198 00:09:04,383 --> 00:09:07,251 And it's starting to stack up-- feels like a lot. 199 00:09:07,269 --> 00:09:08,519 One thing at a time. 200 00:09:08,554 --> 00:09:10,221 That's all you had to do today, 201 00:09:10,255 --> 00:09:13,024 is ask about Columbus day? 202 00:09:16,361 --> 00:09:20,598 Yes-- for God's sake, Andy-- yes, come in. 203 00:09:20,632 --> 00:09:22,900 What's up? 204 00:09:22,934 --> 00:09:24,819 Weird thing... 205 00:09:24,870 --> 00:09:26,170 Totally awkward... 206 00:09:26,204 --> 00:09:29,273 But you left your notebook on the reception desk... 207 00:09:29,291 --> 00:09:30,741 Great. Thank you. 208 00:09:30,775 --> 00:09:31,876 And-- 209 00:09:31,910 --> 00:09:36,547 It was open... And people saw this, 210 00:09:36,582 --> 00:09:38,716 and they're just kind of going nuts, and like... 211 00:09:38,750 --> 00:09:40,418 - What is this? - Wondering what it is. 212 00:09:40,452 --> 00:09:42,954 It's a photocopy from your notebook. 213 00:09:42,988 --> 00:09:45,306 You read my notebook, and-- and photocopied it, 214 00:09:45,340 --> 00:09:46,624 and distributed it. 215 00:09:46,658 --> 00:09:49,126 No. 216 00:09:49,144 --> 00:09:53,147 They did, and they asked me to ask about it. 217 00:09:53,181 --> 00:09:55,666 Please. 218 00:09:58,604 --> 00:10:00,021 Here's what it is. It's a doodle. 219 00:10:00,072 --> 00:10:02,156 What? 220 00:10:02,190 --> 00:10:04,775 Some people doodle at work when they let their mind run. 221 00:10:04,809 --> 00:10:07,244 They draw houses, penises... 222 00:10:07,279 --> 00:10:10,281 Funny how the houses are always colonials, 223 00:10:10,315 --> 00:10:12,149 and the penises are always circumcised, 224 00:10:12,184 --> 00:10:13,884 don't you think? 225 00:10:13,919 --> 00:10:16,203 Well, I doodle too. 226 00:10:16,254 --> 00:10:18,990 But I'm not an artist, so I draw words and lists. 227 00:10:19,024 --> 00:10:23,177 That is fascinating. 228 00:10:23,211 --> 00:10:25,496 And by the way, I am so glad I asked. 229 00:10:25,514 --> 00:10:28,099 People were just sort of-- Did you just move my name? 230 00:10:28,133 --> 00:10:31,852 Might as well have been sketching a cube. 231 00:10:38,668 --> 00:10:40,085 Okay. Everybody think, quick. What do these groups have in common? 232 00:10:40,119 --> 00:10:42,003 Maybe we're supposed to do it with people in our group. 233 00:10:42,055 --> 00:10:43,455 That's not it. 234 00:10:43,489 --> 00:10:45,691 - People in the other group? - Mm-mm. Still wrong. 235 00:10:45,725 --> 00:10:48,944 Stanley, you do puzzles all day. What do we got? 236 00:10:48,978 --> 00:10:51,496 Well, you take the first letter from each name, 237 00:10:51,531 --> 00:10:53,231 assign it a number, add 'em all up, 238 00:10:53,266 --> 00:10:55,467 and shove it up your butt! 239 00:10:55,501 --> 00:10:57,869 - Thank you. A little much-needed comic relief. 240 00:10:57,904 --> 00:11:00,539 But we really need to figure this out, guys. 241 00:11:00,573 --> 00:11:04,309 I know! It's alphabetical. 242 00:11:04,327 --> 00:11:06,995 No. No, it's not. 243 00:11:07,029 --> 00:11:08,697 Here's how we find out. Let's line up, 244 00:11:08,748 --> 00:11:11,149 and compare the line, see if we learn anything, okay? 245 00:11:11,167 --> 00:11:13,485 Left-siders, over here. Right-siders line up over here. 246 00:11:13,519 --> 00:11:14,653 Face each other. 247 00:11:14,687 --> 00:11:17,205 Match up by height and relative weight. 248 00:11:17,256 --> 00:11:20,709 Let's just size each other up here, 249 00:11:20,760 --> 00:11:24,096 and left side of the list... 250 00:11:24,130 --> 00:11:25,997 Attack! Wait, wait, wait. 251 00:11:26,015 --> 00:11:27,499 Stop, stop, stop. 252 00:11:27,533 --> 00:11:29,667 Will you stop? 253 00:11:29,685 --> 00:11:32,270 Dwight! Dwight! Go for it! 254 00:11:34,540 --> 00:11:39,144 Stop, stop. Warning! Warning! Warning! 255 00:11:42,899 --> 00:11:45,450 I'd like to invite the following people 256 00:11:45,485 --> 00:11:47,953 to join me for lunch-- 257 00:11:47,987 --> 00:11:52,741 Jim, Dwight, Angela, Darryl, 258 00:11:52,792 --> 00:11:58,580 Kevin, Toby, Phyllis, Oscar. 259 00:11:58,631 --> 00:12:01,049 That's great! 260 00:12:01,083 --> 00:12:03,218 Let's do this, guys! 261 00:12:03,252 --> 00:12:04,836 All right. 262 00:12:04,871 --> 00:12:06,871 Well, I will see you in a bit. 263 00:12:06,889 --> 00:12:08,140 I love you so much. 264 00:12:08,174 --> 00:12:11,510 Hey, it's nothing, all right? 265 00:12:11,544 --> 00:12:13,211 Text you when we get there 266 00:12:13,229 --> 00:12:14,229 and let you know what's going on. 267 00:12:14,263 --> 00:12:17,215 - Okay. - No. No dog video. 268 00:12:17,233 --> 00:12:20,552 - Okay. - Okay. See you guys. 269 00:12:22,588 --> 00:12:25,490 Well, we should all be really excited 270 00:12:25,525 --> 00:12:30,128 about our... Very own pizza party. 271 00:12:30,163 --> 00:12:31,780 Pizza party! 272 00:12:31,831 --> 00:12:33,165 ♪ Pizza party ♪ 273 00:12:33,199 --> 00:12:34,783 ♪ pizza party... ♪ 274 00:12:34,834 --> 00:12:36,334 Jim, your daughter Cecilia-- 275 00:12:36,369 --> 00:12:37,953 What does she think of the street? 276 00:12:38,004 --> 00:12:40,605 - Uh, the street? - Sesame Street. 277 00:12:40,640 --> 00:12:43,041 Oh! I didn't know anybody... called-- 278 00:12:43,075 --> 00:12:44,342 She likes it a lot. 279 00:12:44,377 --> 00:12:45,944 She, uh, loves elmo. 280 00:12:45,978 --> 00:12:48,446 Elmo. God save us-- The Elmo era. 281 00:12:48,481 --> 00:12:50,765 - Right? - Sesame Street was created 282 00:12:50,800 --> 00:12:52,851 to reflect the environment of the children watching it. 283 00:12:52,885 --> 00:12:55,353 The complete self-absorption of Elmo 284 00:12:55,388 --> 00:12:57,489 is brilliantly reflective of our time. 285 00:12:57,523 --> 00:13:00,659 Ours is a cultural ghetto. Wouldn't you agree? 286 00:13:00,693 --> 00:13:04,296 Yeah. She does like elmo. 287 00:13:04,330 --> 00:13:05,697 "Cultural ghetto"? 288 00:13:05,731 --> 00:13:07,499 Totally, totally agree. 289 00:13:07,533 --> 00:13:11,303 - Completely. - Apt. Apt analysis, Robert. 290 00:13:11,337 --> 00:13:13,371 The thing that I like about elmo 291 00:13:13,406 --> 00:13:15,874 is the tickling. 292 00:13:15,908 --> 00:13:17,959 I should not be here. 293 00:13:17,994 --> 00:13:20,378 I'm in the-- I was in the wrong-- 294 00:13:20,413 --> 00:13:22,681 I'm...I'm sorry. 295 00:13:22,715 --> 00:13:24,516 Uh, just picture me back there. 296 00:13:24,550 --> 00:13:26,218 I-I was never here. 297 00:13:29,639 --> 00:13:33,225 - Great group! Pizza party! - How is this a pizza party? 298 00:13:33,259 --> 00:13:35,810 Well, why don't you ask me again when the five pizzas get here? 299 00:13:35,845 --> 00:13:36,928 Yeah, well that's just pizza. 300 00:13:36,963 --> 00:13:38,029 You need at least one other element 301 00:13:38,064 --> 00:13:39,797 for it to be a party. Okay. 302 00:13:39,815 --> 00:13:41,066 You guys ever had Margarita pizza? 303 00:13:41,100 --> 00:13:43,134 - What's that? - Fresh tomato, 304 00:13:43,169 --> 00:13:46,321 with a dollop of mozzarella cheese. 305 00:13:46,355 --> 00:13:49,507 - That's pizza. - That's regular pizza. 306 00:13:49,542 --> 00:13:51,076 You know, I feel comfortable enough now 307 00:13:51,110 --> 00:13:52,193 to ask you this question. 308 00:13:52,245 --> 00:13:54,980 What made you pick... This group? 309 00:13:55,014 --> 00:13:56,781 I just think you guys are winners, 310 00:13:56,815 --> 00:13:58,083 and I wanted to have lunch with you. 311 00:13:58,117 --> 00:13:59,200 Okay. 312 00:13:59,252 --> 00:14:00,818 Aww. 313 00:14:00,836 --> 00:14:02,687 Well, what about the other guys? 314 00:14:02,722 --> 00:14:05,257 - Losers? Come on. - Oh, come on. 315 00:14:05,291 --> 00:14:06,758 - Come on, come on. - No. Well... 316 00:14:06,792 --> 00:14:08,510 I guess I think they're losers. 317 00:14:08,544 --> 00:14:12,180 Ah, I knew it. Yes! 318 00:14:12,214 --> 00:14:13,565 Probably shouldn't have said that. 319 00:14:13,599 --> 00:14:15,267 Whoo! Whoo-hoo! 320 00:14:15,301 --> 00:14:18,603 Aha-oo! Their interpretation of Margarita pizza. 321 00:14:18,638 --> 00:14:21,373 Fans of classic pizza will be psyched. 322 00:14:23,209 --> 00:14:24,526 Oh, text from Jim. 323 00:14:24,560 --> 00:14:26,711 "This is getting very weird. 324 00:14:26,746 --> 00:14:29,281 Will explain later." 325 00:14:31,400 --> 00:14:33,718 Oh, text from Kevin. 326 00:14:33,753 --> 00:14:36,371 "Suck it, losers." 327 00:14:39,154 --> 00:14:43,187 Okay, now clearing the obvious, but doesn't the fact 328 00:14:43,238 --> 00:14:44,605 that I'm in this group 329 00:14:44,640 --> 00:14:46,741 make anyone feel just a little bit better? 330 00:14:46,775 --> 00:14:50,110 Oh, this crust is sharp! 331 00:14:50,128 --> 00:14:52,229 I used to be young and cute 332 00:14:52,264 --> 00:14:55,216 and sort of funny, and... 333 00:14:55,250 --> 00:14:57,485 I could do those cute, little cartoons. 334 00:14:57,519 --> 00:15:00,671 And everyone who came through here was like... 335 00:15:00,722 --> 00:15:03,140 "Who's that receptionist? I like her." 336 00:15:03,175 --> 00:15:06,961 Now I'm just a fat mom. Yeah. 337 00:15:06,995 --> 00:15:08,529 And you take one look at me 338 00:15:08,563 --> 00:15:10,331 and you're like, "oh, loser." 339 00:15:10,365 --> 00:15:13,100 Come here, Pam. 340 00:15:13,134 --> 00:15:15,269 Chins up, okay? 341 00:15:15,303 --> 00:15:17,938 Bad joke. 342 00:15:17,973 --> 00:15:19,273 Look around this room. 343 00:15:19,307 --> 00:15:21,542 Does this look like a group of losers? 344 00:15:21,576 --> 00:15:23,577 Seriously. 345 00:15:26,999 --> 00:15:30,668 Oh. Oh, God. 346 00:15:32,170 --> 00:15:34,038 Oh! 347 00:15:34,089 --> 00:15:37,058 Hey, guys, we had so much fun. We had Margarita pizza. 348 00:15:37,092 --> 00:15:39,126 We all hung out and got to know each other better. 349 00:15:39,160 --> 00:15:40,177 How was your lunch? 350 00:15:40,212 --> 00:15:42,196 - It was excellent. - Good times. 351 00:15:42,230 --> 00:15:44,098 - Yeah? Yeah? - Oh, we did. 352 00:15:44,132 --> 00:15:45,800 It was the best time. 353 00:15:45,834 --> 00:15:46,967 And you know what? 354 00:15:47,001 --> 00:15:49,303 Now it's over. Back to work everyone. 355 00:15:49,337 --> 00:15:51,722 You too, Andy. 356 00:15:51,773 --> 00:15:52,890 I knew it. 357 00:15:52,941 --> 00:15:54,775 I just knew, my whole life, 358 00:15:54,810 --> 00:15:57,311 that everyone was wrong about me-- 359 00:15:57,346 --> 00:15:59,179 my parents, my teachers, 360 00:15:59,197 --> 00:16:01,515 my friends, the doctors-- 361 00:16:01,550 --> 00:16:03,401 everyone. 362 00:16:03,452 --> 00:16:04,485 Well, that was certainly 363 00:16:04,519 --> 00:16:07,688 an odd lunch. 364 00:16:09,224 --> 00:16:10,791 Is everything all right? 365 00:16:10,826 --> 00:16:13,561 Yeah, I'm fine. 366 00:16:17,799 --> 00:16:19,417 Just-- just take the-- 367 00:16:19,468 --> 00:16:20,668 take the casserole out of the-- 368 00:16:20,702 --> 00:16:21,802 - Loser. - Take it out 369 00:16:21,837 --> 00:16:23,437 of the refrigerator and put it in the oven. 370 00:16:23,472 --> 00:16:24,889 Uh, it'll be fine. Just leave it in 371 00:16:24,923 --> 00:16:26,240 for 20 minutes. 372 00:16:26,274 --> 00:16:28,275 - Loser. - Losers. 373 00:16:28,310 --> 00:16:29,910 When I was a salesman, I could just be like, 374 00:16:29,945 --> 00:16:31,545 "not my job, not my prob. 375 00:16:31,580 --> 00:16:33,647 I'm going to the warehouse to Polish my knob." 376 00:16:33,682 --> 00:16:36,817 Metaphorically, of course. 377 00:16:36,852 --> 00:16:39,286 But now... It is my job, 378 00:16:39,321 --> 00:16:41,055 and my prob. 379 00:16:41,089 --> 00:16:43,774 Hi, Robert? 380 00:16:43,825 --> 00:16:45,192 Can you come out here please? 381 00:16:45,227 --> 00:16:47,111 It's really important. 382 00:16:49,831 --> 00:16:52,566 Just wanted to clarify something. 383 00:16:52,584 --> 00:16:56,804 Some people here are under the misconception 384 00:16:56,838 --> 00:17:01,292 that some people may be considered, 385 00:17:01,343 --> 00:17:03,243 uh, let's say top-tier, 386 00:17:03,261 --> 00:17:05,179 and others would be... 387 00:17:05,213 --> 00:17:07,381 Second-tier. - I never said that. 388 00:17:07,416 --> 00:17:09,583 Thank you. Great. 389 00:17:09,601 --> 00:17:10,968 I said "winners" and "losers." 390 00:17:11,019 --> 00:17:12,286 Is that what you're talking about? 391 00:17:12,320 --> 00:17:15,322 Oh, that might-- that actually might be... 392 00:17:15,357 --> 00:17:17,191 What I'm thinking of. 393 00:17:17,225 --> 00:17:19,860 - Can you clarify that? - Let me tell you some things 394 00:17:19,895 --> 00:17:22,530 I find productive. 395 00:17:22,564 --> 00:17:26,200 Positive reinforcement, 396 00:17:26,234 --> 00:17:27,535 negative reinforcement, 397 00:17:27,569 --> 00:17:28,936 honesty. 398 00:17:28,954 --> 00:17:32,106 I'll tell you some things I find unproductive. 399 00:17:32,140 --> 00:17:35,376 Constantly worrying about where you stand 400 00:17:35,410 --> 00:17:37,945 based on inscrutable social clues, 401 00:17:37,979 --> 00:17:40,514 and then inevitably reframing it all 402 00:17:40,549 --> 00:17:42,950 in a reassuring way so that you can get to sleep at night. 403 00:17:42,984 --> 00:17:45,853 No, I do not believe in that at all. 404 00:17:45,887 --> 00:17:48,839 If I invited you to lunch, I think you're a winner. 405 00:17:48,890 --> 00:17:50,391 If I didn't, I don't. 406 00:17:50,425 --> 00:17:52,226 But I just met you all. 407 00:17:52,260 --> 00:17:54,628 Life is long. Opinions change. 408 00:17:54,646 --> 00:17:56,530 Winners, prove me right. 409 00:17:56,565 --> 00:17:59,033 Losers, prove me wrong. 410 00:18:04,706 --> 00:18:06,507 Whew! 411 00:18:06,541 --> 00:18:08,742 Well, I guess that's that. 412 00:18:08,777 --> 00:18:13,981 No. No, no. 413 00:18:15,333 --> 00:18:17,168 Andy, don't go in there! 414 00:18:17,202 --> 00:18:19,587 I'm going in there. 415 00:18:24,176 --> 00:18:26,794 I know that every time I talk to you, 416 00:18:26,828 --> 00:18:28,712 things just seem to get worse. 417 00:18:28,763 --> 00:18:32,066 But, you don't know these people and I do. 418 00:18:32,100 --> 00:18:34,468 And if I let you work with faulty information, 419 00:18:34,503 --> 00:18:37,388 well then I'm not doing my job as regional manager. 420 00:18:37,439 --> 00:18:42,226 So...Please take this pen and change your list. 421 00:18:42,277 --> 00:18:44,378 I'm not going to change my list, Andy, 422 00:18:44,412 --> 00:18:46,347 and I don't use ballpoint pens. 423 00:18:46,381 --> 00:18:48,582 Well, then 424 00:18:48,617 --> 00:18:50,701 I will make a new list for you. 425 00:18:55,290 --> 00:18:57,208 Stanley-- 426 00:18:57,242 --> 00:18:59,159 You may think he's a lazy grump, 427 00:18:59,194 --> 00:19:01,161 but did you know that he has the most consistently high 428 00:19:01,196 --> 00:19:03,330 sales numbers of anyone in this office? 429 00:19:03,364 --> 00:19:05,432 And you may think he's hard to love, 430 00:19:05,467 --> 00:19:06,867 but did you know that he's in, not one, 431 00:19:06,885 --> 00:19:09,253 but two long-term romantic relationships? 432 00:19:09,304 --> 00:19:12,590 I did not know about the sales figures. 433 00:19:12,641 --> 00:19:14,575 Meredith Palmer, supplier relations-- 434 00:19:14,609 --> 00:19:17,645 The word "no," not even in her vocabulary. 435 00:19:17,679 --> 00:19:20,080 And just to show you that I'm being fair, you had Gabe 436 00:19:20,115 --> 00:19:22,433 in the loser column. I think that is... 437 00:19:22,484 --> 00:19:25,569 Astute. Good call. 438 00:19:25,604 --> 00:19:30,324 Pam-- Easily the most creative 439 00:19:30,358 --> 00:19:32,960 and kind person I have ever worked with. 440 00:19:32,994 --> 00:19:34,245 Jim, shut the door. 441 00:19:34,279 --> 00:19:36,463 This is just gross. Shh! 442 00:19:36,498 --> 00:19:39,767 Erin Hannon-- The receptionist and my closest confidante-- 443 00:19:39,801 --> 00:19:42,102 a winner if there ever was one. 444 00:19:42,137 --> 00:19:44,538 I like my new group. 445 00:19:44,573 --> 00:19:47,975 I liked my old group. 446 00:19:48,009 --> 00:19:51,078 - Are we done? - Yes. No. 447 00:19:51,096 --> 00:19:53,047 The Friday before Columbus day 448 00:19:53,081 --> 00:19:54,882 we're going to take a half-day 449 00:19:54,916 --> 00:19:56,884 so that everyone can get a jump on the long weekend. 450 00:19:56,918 --> 00:19:59,720 You want a 3 1/2 day weekend for Columbus day. 451 00:19:59,754 --> 00:20:01,972 Yes, I do. 452 00:20:02,023 --> 00:20:04,992 And you are aware that Columbus and his legions 453 00:20:05,026 --> 00:20:07,461 committed genocide against an entire civilization 454 00:20:07,495 --> 00:20:09,063 of native Americans. 455 00:20:09,097 --> 00:20:12,433 I don't care. 456 00:20:21,109 --> 00:20:22,943 Hey, guys! 457 00:20:22,961 --> 00:20:27,298 So Columbus day-- We got that half-day on Friday. 458 00:20:27,332 --> 00:20:29,116 We get that every year. 459 00:20:29,134 --> 00:20:31,518 Well, you got it this year too. 460 00:20:33,254 --> 00:20:36,056 - Good night, Andy. - Good night. 461 00:20:36,091 --> 00:20:38,392 Good-bye. 462 00:20:38,426 --> 00:20:39,677 Good night, Andy. 463 00:20:43,181 --> 00:20:47,334 - Good night. - Good night. 464 00:20:58,100 --> 00:20:59,650 All right, I'm going to go warm up the car. 465 00:20:59,685 --> 00:21:01,936 - Okay. - Okay. 466 00:21:01,970 --> 00:21:03,738 Oh, uh, you dropped something! 467 00:21:03,772 --> 00:21:05,873 Jim! 468 00:21:05,908 --> 00:21:09,944 Okay, I know I've been crying easily today, but... 469 00:21:11,847 --> 00:21:15,716 I mean, that's just pretty killer, right? 470 00:21:15,751 --> 00:21:18,646 I mean, maybe it's stupid. 471 00:21:18,647 --> 00:21:23,665 No. It's wonderful. 472 00:21:23,700 --> 00:21:25,323 I'm gonna frame it. 473 00:21:28,098 --> 00:21:30,241 I can always unframe.