1
00:00:01,200 --> 00:00:03,964
Look at that, huh? Nice!
2
00:00:04,237 --> 00:00:05,761
I love cycling.
3
00:00:05,838 --> 00:00:07,635
Andy, I feel like
a tourist in my own city.
4
00:00:07,707 --> 00:00:09,197
I literally can't wait
to wake up every morning.
5
00:00:09,409 --> 00:00:11,070
Okay.
She is a beaut.
6
00:00:11,144 --> 00:00:13,578
Can't beat a horse.
A horse is a bike
that pedals itself.
7
00:00:13,646 --> 00:00:14,772
Yes, it is.
8
00:00:14,847 --> 00:00:15,905
Look at that, smooth roll.
9
00:00:15,982 --> 00:00:17,279
Yeah.
KEVIN: You got it!
10
00:00:17,350 --> 00:00:18,408
Lance Armstrong's bike.
11
00:00:18,484 --> 00:00:19,473
Yes!
12
00:00:19,552 --> 00:00:22,646
His ass was on
that seat? All right!
KEVIN: Nice.
13
00:00:22,722 --> 00:00:24,314
No, Meredith, it's
not his actual bicycle.
14
00:00:24,390 --> 00:00:27,018
But it is the same
exact model he uses.
15
00:00:27,126 --> 00:00:28,923
I'm on Sheryl Crow's
side in that whole thing,
16
00:00:28,995 --> 00:00:30,724
so I feel really
weird right now.
17
00:00:30,797 --> 00:00:32,162
PAM: Michael!
MICHAEL: Oh, God!
18
00:00:33,299 --> 00:00:35,324
Yes, I can ride a bike.
19
00:00:35,401 --> 00:00:38,029
I take spinning classes
three times a month.
20
00:00:38,604 --> 00:00:40,128
I think I know
how to ride a bike.
21
00:00:40,273 --> 00:00:41,638
Are you sure you once
knew how to do this?
22
00:00:41,708 --> 00:00:43,005
I did, yes!
23
00:00:43,076 --> 00:00:46,944
I had those extra
wheels on the back
that support you.
24
00:00:47,013 --> 00:00:48,776
Michael!
Michael!
25
00:00:49,048 --> 00:00:50,106
ALL:
Michael! Michael!
26
00:00:50,183 --> 00:00:51,172
Michael! Michael!
27
00:00:51,250 --> 00:00:52,342
Michael! Michael!
28
00:00:52,418 --> 00:00:53,442
Michael! Yeah!
29
00:00:53,519 --> 00:00:54,543
All right!
PAM: Yeah!
30
00:00:54,620 --> 00:00:55,609
Just steer more now.
31
00:00:55,688 --> 00:00:56,712
Oh, my God!
32
00:00:56,789 --> 00:00:58,313
Not the car!
No, no.
33
00:00:58,391 --> 00:00:59,653
34
00:01:03,696 --> 00:01:04,924
You never forget.
35
00:01:04,997 --> 00:01:06,225
36
00:01:28,154 --> 00:01:29,246
37
00:01:30,223 --> 00:01:31,554
How do I look?
38
00:01:31,624 --> 00:01:32,921
Amazing.
How do I look?
39
00:01:33,860 --> 00:01:35,384
Normal. Ugly.
40
00:01:36,028 --> 00:01:37,893
Well, I do the best
with what I've got.
41
00:01:37,964 --> 00:01:39,761
Let's go.
All right.
42
00:01:40,666 --> 00:01:44,102
Wait, wait, wait, wait for me.
It's weird if I
come in slightly after.
43
00:01:44,303 --> 00:01:48,171
We have a big meeting
with the chief buyer
for Frames Select, Steve Nash.
44
00:01:48,241 --> 00:01:50,209
He's not "the" Steve Nash.
He's...
45
00:01:50,276 --> 00:01:52,301
He's big, though.
He's kind of like
Scranton's Steve Nash.
46
00:01:52,378 --> 00:01:54,869
Will you stop trying
to put it in terms
you think they'll understand?
47
00:01:54,947 --> 00:01:55,971
It's condescending.
48
00:01:56,048 --> 00:01:57,709
I'm not doing that.
I'm just explaining.
49
00:01:57,784 --> 00:02:00,344
And who is this
"the" Steve Nash?
50
00:02:01,087 --> 00:02:02,554
Phoenix Suns' point guard?
51
00:02:02,622 --> 00:02:03,987
No.
No? Nothing?
52
00:02:04,056 --> 00:02:05,956
No, Mr. Jock Hipster.
53
00:02:06,025 --> 00:02:08,755
Well, I'm neither of
those things, so...
54
00:02:10,029 --> 00:02:11,018
Oh ho.
55
00:02:11,364 --> 00:02:13,127
Libby Dirketts got married.
56
00:02:13,199 --> 00:02:15,997
Big, red mazel tov
to the Libster.
57
00:02:16,602 --> 00:02:17,591
Ooh.
58
00:02:17,670 --> 00:02:20,639
It says here Dan Becker
fell off the side
of Kilimanjaro
59
00:02:20,706 --> 00:02:22,003
in a climbing accident.
60
00:02:22,308 --> 00:02:24,003
It appears Dan's
Sherpa survived
61
00:02:24,076 --> 00:02:25,703
to tell the tale...
Oh, my God!
62
00:02:25,945 --> 00:02:27,139
What? Is Dan okay?
63
00:02:27,280 --> 00:02:28,872
No, he died.
64
00:02:28,948 --> 00:02:30,540
It's Broccoli Rob.
65
00:02:30,616 --> 00:02:32,777
You know this guy.
I showed you his
picture on Facebook.
66
00:02:33,553 --> 00:02:34,577
Yes.
67
00:02:34,654 --> 00:02:39,250
"Some Vermont-based alums
can hear
'Broccoli' Rob Blatt, '96,
68
00:02:39,325 --> 00:02:42,590
"in the state milk lobby's
new milk awareness song
Calci-yum,
69
00:02:42,662 --> 00:02:44,755
"featuring
Phish's Trey Anastasio.
70
00:02:44,831 --> 00:02:47,493
"Says Broccoli,
'Trey and I had a ton
of fun in the studio,
71
00:02:47,567 --> 00:02:49,091
"'and I think you can
hear it in the song."'
72
00:02:49,202 --> 00:02:50,931
Oh, that's great news
for your friend.
73
00:02:51,904 --> 00:02:53,337
Yeah. Yeah. It's great.
74
00:02:53,406 --> 00:02:56,432
You know, I forget about milk.
This is a terrific reminder.
75
00:03:00,313 --> 00:03:02,611
I was the artsy musical one.
76
00:03:03,249 --> 00:03:06,548
In Here Comes Treble,
I had four solos,
Broccoli Rob had three.
77
00:03:06,619 --> 00:03:07,847
Right?
78
00:03:08,821 --> 00:03:10,083
79
00:03:12,859 --> 00:03:15,726
Go tell her we're here. You're
good with receptionists.
Ha.
80
00:03:18,264 --> 00:03:19,526
Dwight.
81
00:03:24,470 --> 00:03:25,562
Crap.
82
00:03:26,906 --> 00:03:28,430
Danny Cordray
is the worst.
83
00:03:28,508 --> 00:03:29,839
Well, by worst,
you mean the best.
84
00:03:29,909 --> 00:03:31,774
The best salesman ever.
85
00:03:31,844 --> 00:03:33,539
He works for Osprey
Paper over in Throop,
86
00:03:33,613 --> 00:03:35,581
steals more clients
from Dunder Mifflin
than anyone.
87
00:03:35,648 --> 00:03:37,275
So the situation
is the worst.
88
00:03:37,350 --> 00:03:38,749
Also, he slept with Pam.
89
00:03:38,818 --> 00:03:40,308
No, he didn't.
90
00:03:43,756 --> 00:03:46,350
Tell them.
Nothing happened.
91
00:03:46,425 --> 00:03:49,519
We went on a couple of dates.
He never called me again.
92
00:03:49,595 --> 00:03:52,257
What? He never called you?
I thought you said
it just fizzled.
93
00:03:52,331 --> 00:03:54,822
That's fizzling.
I mean, someone has
to start the fizzle.
94
00:03:54,901 --> 00:03:56,163
Yeah, I thought
you started it.
95
00:03:56,235 --> 00:03:58,066
No, I liked him.
96
00:03:58,137 --> 00:04:00,128
For a couple of days.
97
00:04:00,206 --> 00:04:01,730
Four years ago.
98
00:04:03,543 --> 00:04:05,170
You know I have
a kid with you, right?
99
00:04:05,244 --> 00:04:06,506
Aah!
100
00:04:09,382 --> 00:04:10,781
I'm gonna
intimidate him.
Okay?
101
00:04:10,850 --> 00:04:11,874
Okay, great.
102
00:04:11,951 --> 00:04:13,578
I'm just gonna watch.
Watch this.
103
00:04:13,653 --> 00:04:16,816
So anyway, she says,
"That is the biggest
penis I have ever seen."
104
00:04:16,889 --> 00:04:18,117
And I said, "I know.
105
00:04:18,190 --> 00:04:20,181
"That's why I brought you
to the penis museum,
106
00:04:20,259 --> 00:04:23,751
"where tickets are $1,000."
Well, hello, Danny.
107
00:04:23,829 --> 00:04:26,798
Hey, Dwight.
Good to see you. Jim, hey.
108
00:04:26,866 --> 00:04:27,992
How are you?
I'm good.
109
00:04:28,067 --> 00:04:29,432
What are you doing?
110
00:04:29,502 --> 00:04:30,833
Well, I'm just here
for the coffee.
111
00:04:31,203 --> 00:04:33,137
Like hell you are.
Dwight!
112
00:04:33,573 --> 00:04:35,268
He's not just here
for the coffee, Jim.
Wake up.
113
00:04:37,009 --> 00:04:39,170
Brainstorming
session is now open.
114
00:04:39,245 --> 00:04:41,839
Anyone has an idea...
Hold on.
115
00:04:41,914 --> 00:04:44,883
Sorry, sorry, sorry. Hello?
116
00:04:45,117 --> 00:04:48,086
Hey, it's Jim.
Listen, this is important.
Are you busy?
117
00:04:48,154 --> 00:04:49,746
Oh, hey. No,
I'm not busy.
What's up?
118
00:04:49,822 --> 00:04:51,551
You are busy!
We're in a meeting!
What?
119
00:04:51,624 --> 00:04:53,717
It's Jim, okay? Yes.
120
00:04:53,793 --> 00:04:54,919
Listen, you gotta
get over here,
121
00:04:54,994 --> 00:04:56,086
'cause we're
pitching Steve Nash
122
00:04:56,162 --> 00:04:57,493
and Danny Cordray's here.
123
00:04:57,797 --> 00:04:59,424
You need the big guns, yes?
124
00:04:59,532 --> 00:05:00,931
Yes.
What'd he say?
125
00:05:01,000 --> 00:05:02,865
What did he say?
The big gun thing. Stop.
126
00:05:02,969 --> 00:05:05,335
I will see you in 10.
Bye! Hold tight.
127
00:05:06,339 --> 00:05:07,328
128
00:05:07,807 --> 00:05:09,502
Well, I know
a lot of you thought
129
00:05:09,575 --> 00:05:11,236
that my sales
days were behind me.
130
00:05:11,310 --> 00:05:12,436
And, to be honest,
so did I.
131
00:05:13,179 --> 00:05:15,477
And the only reason
I got out of the sales game
132
00:05:15,548 --> 00:05:17,277
was to be reluctantly
called back in.
133
00:05:17,650 --> 00:05:20,084
You don't look reluctant,
Michael. You look
really eager.
134
00:05:20,152 --> 00:05:23,781
No, I don't have
time for this.
Are you kidding me?
135
00:05:23,856 --> 00:05:26,188
PAM: You don't?
No! Okay. All right.
136
00:05:28,794 --> 00:05:30,887
Knockity-knock,
Don't knock back
137
00:05:30,963 --> 00:05:33,932
Just kidding, you can knock.
It's your office.
Do you have a minute?
138
00:05:34,333 --> 00:05:36,665
I'm very busy with
time-sensitive work.
139
00:05:38,004 --> 00:05:39,631
Not to go all
Sherlock Holmes on you,
140
00:05:39,705 --> 00:05:41,263
but I can tell by
the reflection in your glasses
141
00:05:41,340 --> 00:05:43,672
that you're entering points
into weightwatchers. Com.
142
00:05:43,909 --> 00:05:46,844
If you don't enter
them immediately,
you forget.
143
00:05:47,713 --> 00:05:48,702
What?
144
00:05:48,781 --> 00:05:51,944
I'm starting a band,
and I need you on keyboards.
145
00:05:52,051 --> 00:05:53,211
Nah!
146
00:05:53,419 --> 00:05:54,511
I play for pleasure.
147
00:05:54,787 --> 00:05:55,981
This is for pleasure.
148
00:05:56,722 --> 00:05:57,746
Wouldn't enjoy that.
149
00:05:57,957 --> 00:05:58,981
I'm willing to pay you.
150
00:05:59,692 --> 00:06:00,750
Oh, yeah?
Yeah.
151
00:06:00,826 --> 00:06:02,555
How much?
60 bucks a session.
152
00:06:02,628 --> 00:06:04,152
That's crazy money.
153
00:06:04,230 --> 00:06:05,219
I'll take 40.
154
00:06:05,297 --> 00:06:06,286
Yes!
155
00:06:07,700 --> 00:06:09,099
There he is.
156
00:06:10,403 --> 00:06:11,995
Oh, no, that's a male model.
157
00:06:12,071 --> 00:06:14,039
No, that's him.
That...
158
00:06:15,508 --> 00:06:16,634
Hello.
159
00:06:17,810 --> 00:06:19,437
Michael Scott,
Dunder Mifflin Paper Company.
160
00:06:19,512 --> 00:06:20,638
Danny Cordray, Osprey Paper.
161
00:06:20,713 --> 00:06:21,771
Nice to meet you.
162
00:06:22,481 --> 00:06:23,641
Three of you
guys for one sale?
163
00:06:23,716 --> 00:06:26,184
Yeah, well...
We call it overkill.
164
00:06:26,252 --> 00:06:28,186
Why am I telling
you my strategy?
165
00:06:28,421 --> 00:06:30,480
Well, whatever works for you.
166
00:06:30,856 --> 00:06:32,050
Anyway, all right.
All right.
167
00:06:32,124 --> 00:06:33,284
Good to see you guys.
Nice to meet you.
168
00:06:33,359 --> 00:06:34,451
Goodbye.
169
00:06:34,527 --> 00:06:36,654
I could swear that
guy was a male model.
170
00:06:36,729 --> 00:06:37,753
He's ready for you.
171
00:06:37,830 --> 00:06:38,819
Oh! Thank you.
172
00:06:38,898 --> 00:06:41,128
All right.
On the count of three,
it's show time.
173
00:06:41,233 --> 00:06:42,791
Ready, one, two...
No, I'm not doing that.
174
00:06:42,902 --> 00:06:44,301
I've been in show time
mode since breakfast.
175
00:06:44,370 --> 00:06:45,837
You're not?
Okay, all right,
just forget it then.
176
00:06:45,905 --> 00:06:47,770
Show time!
It's show time!
177
00:06:47,840 --> 00:06:49,774
Never mind. Let's go.
178
00:06:49,842 --> 00:06:52,367
When I knock on your door,
you know who it is.
179
00:06:52,445 --> 00:06:53,673
It's Michael Scott.
180
00:06:53,746 --> 00:06:55,407
We've been
together forever, and...
181
00:06:55,481 --> 00:06:57,472
Michael,
I appreciate everything
182
00:06:57,550 --> 00:06:59,609
that Dunder Mifflin has
done for this company.
183
00:06:59,685 --> 00:07:02,518
You know what? You are
having some problems
with your loading dock.
184
00:07:02,588 --> 00:07:06,422
Are you not? All right,
we're going to deliver
to you on weekends.
185
00:07:06,792 --> 00:07:08,020
That's very generous, but...
186
00:07:08,094 --> 00:07:09,959
And you know what
else we're gonna do?
187
00:07:10,029 --> 00:07:11,326
I can't believe
I'm gonna say this.
188
00:07:11,397 --> 00:07:14,127
We are going to offer
you our paper at cost.
189
00:07:14,200 --> 00:07:15,292
I know.
190
00:07:15,668 --> 00:07:16,999
I could get in a lot
of trouble for this,
191
00:07:17,069 --> 00:07:18,058
so you'd better
shake my hand right now.
192
00:07:18,137 --> 00:07:19,126
He's not kidding.
193
00:07:19,205 --> 00:07:20,194
Shake it, shake it!
194
00:07:20,272 --> 00:07:21,364
Michael, I'm going
with Danny.
195
00:07:21,640 --> 00:07:22,629
Oh.
196
00:07:23,175 --> 00:07:24,199
Thanks for coming in.
197
00:07:24,477 --> 00:07:25,944
Okay. Thank you.
198
00:07:26,011 --> 00:07:27,171
Thank you.
199
00:07:28,981 --> 00:07:30,915
Jim talked too much.
No, I didn't.
200
00:07:30,983 --> 00:07:32,814
Yes, you did.
Stop it. Just stop it.
201
00:07:32,885 --> 00:07:36,184
We did what we
should have done.
We just got bested.
202
00:07:37,957 --> 00:07:39,185
Why is there
a door close button
203
00:07:39,258 --> 00:07:40,589
if it doesn't
even close the door?
204
00:07:42,094 --> 00:07:44,562
How do I feel
about losing the sale?
205
00:07:44,630 --> 00:07:48,259
It's like if Michael Phelps
came out of retirement,
206
00:07:48,334 --> 00:07:51,667
jumped in the pool,
belly-flopped and drowned.
207
00:07:52,138 --> 00:07:54,333
You know who we
always lose out to?
208
00:07:54,406 --> 00:07:56,738
Staples, the big guys...
209
00:07:57,076 --> 00:08:00,603
Osprey?
They're a small company.
They're smaller than we are.
210
00:08:00,679 --> 00:08:03,512
What's our excuse?
How do we combat this guy?
211
00:08:03,849 --> 00:08:05,043
Stanley, how do we combat him?
212
00:08:05,117 --> 00:08:06,175
We sell better?
213
00:08:06,285 --> 00:08:08,014
Okay. You know what?
214
00:08:08,087 --> 00:08:10,920
You clearly don't care,
so why don't you just leave?
215
00:08:11,123 --> 00:08:13,114
I would like to stay.
This pertains to me.
216
00:08:13,192 --> 00:08:14,989
Why don't you go outside
217
00:08:15,060 --> 00:08:17,528
and take a shot of insulin
and have a nap, okay?
218
00:08:17,596 --> 00:08:19,530
Why do you always
assume I have diabetes?
219
00:08:19,598 --> 00:08:21,293
I don't know.
Your frame, your build.
220
00:08:21,367 --> 00:08:22,732
Why don't you have
a glass of apple juice
221
00:08:22,802 --> 00:08:25,100
and tell me
you're not a diabetic?
222
00:08:25,171 --> 00:08:27,036
See? I could tell
by the sound you made
223
00:08:27,106 --> 00:08:28,471
when you stood up
that you have...
224
00:08:28,541 --> 00:08:29,940
Okay. Yes, Phyllis?
225
00:08:30,009 --> 00:08:31,135
I could try to seduce him.
226
00:08:31,210 --> 00:08:32,575
Oh, my God!
227
00:08:32,645 --> 00:08:35,045
I know how we can
learn his tricks.
228
00:08:35,347 --> 00:08:38,839
What I'm about to show you
is of the utmost secrecy.
229
00:08:40,019 --> 00:08:41,008
Is that your office?
230
00:08:41,086 --> 00:08:42,075
Yes, Jim.
231
00:08:42,154 --> 00:08:44,418
And with a little tweaking,
it becomes a different office.
232
00:08:44,490 --> 00:08:47,789
We lure Danny to it
and watch him sell.
PHYLLIS: Oh.
233
00:08:47,860 --> 00:08:49,555
I'm out of here.
This is weird.
234
00:08:49,628 --> 00:08:51,687
You know what this is?
This is a stinger.
235
00:08:51,764 --> 00:08:53,231
A what?
236
00:08:53,299 --> 00:08:54,391
Like the movie.
237
00:08:54,466 --> 00:08:56,331
I think you mean The Sting.
238
00:08:56,402 --> 00:08:58,165
Paul Newman, Robert Redford.
They're bank robbers?
239
00:08:58,237 --> 00:08:59,431
Nope. Different movie.
It's called The Stinger.
240
00:08:59,505 --> 00:09:00,836
The Sting.
241
00:09:06,178 --> 00:09:07,509
Your 2:00.
242
00:09:07,813 --> 00:09:08,837
Thanks, hon.
243
00:09:09,548 --> 00:09:11,106
Meredith was
the perfect choice
244
00:09:11,183 --> 00:09:13,276
to play the head
of the company.
245
00:09:13,352 --> 00:09:15,377
Her lunch break
lined up with our
appointment with Danny,
246
00:09:15,454 --> 00:09:17,752
and... That's it.
247
00:09:17,823 --> 00:09:19,791
That's really all
we were looking for.
248
00:09:19,925 --> 00:09:21,483
Danny Cordray.
It's great to meet you.
249
00:09:21,560 --> 00:09:23,027
Meredith Van Helsing.
Pleased to meet you.
250
00:09:23,095 --> 00:09:24,756
Meredith Van Helsing?
251
00:09:24,830 --> 00:09:26,388
Van Helsing was
a respected professor
252
00:09:26,465 --> 00:09:27,796
before he was
a vampire killer.
253
00:09:27,867 --> 00:09:29,835
Okay. But what is
he more famous for?
Shh.
254
00:09:32,204 --> 00:09:33,728
Hey! That's my mug.
255
00:09:33,806 --> 00:09:35,205
You know this
isn't real TV, right?
256
00:09:35,274 --> 00:09:36,707
Yes.
257
00:09:37,443 --> 00:09:40,139
Please, Mr. President
258
00:09:40,212 --> 00:09:43,204
If you wanna
Give hope a whirl
259
00:09:43,282 --> 00:09:46,046
Bring our troops
Home safe and sound
260
00:09:46,118 --> 00:09:48,177
Says this little girl
261
00:09:49,755 --> 00:09:51,723
Please, Mr. President
262
00:09:51,957 --> 00:09:53,584
Wait a second,
wait a second,
wait a second.
263
00:09:53,659 --> 00:09:56,651
So, the song is
from the point of view
of a little girl?
264
00:09:56,829 --> 00:09:58,319
Yeah.
But you're singing it.
265
00:09:58,397 --> 00:09:59,887
Yeah. But I'm
using my falsetto.
266
00:10:00,099 --> 00:10:02,659
No, that's not a good idea.
I don't see it as
a very good song.
267
00:10:02,735 --> 00:10:04,464
Yeah, well, it'd
sound a lot better
268
00:10:04,536 --> 00:10:06,231
if you actually
sang with some soul.
269
00:10:06,605 --> 00:10:08,300
I never sing with soul.
That's a lie.
270
00:10:08,407 --> 00:10:09,499
I could sing it.
271
00:10:09,742 --> 00:10:11,835
I just was hoping to
maybe save your voice
272
00:10:11,911 --> 00:10:13,902
in case we did
a novelty song
about frogs.
273
00:10:14,213 --> 00:10:17,182
But my voice is unique.
Like Bob Dylan.
274
00:10:17,549 --> 00:10:18,709
Okay, three-way argument
275
00:10:18,784 --> 00:10:20,513
between a drummer,
a keyboardist,
276
00:10:20,586 --> 00:10:22,247
and the front man,
lead singer.
277
00:10:22,888 --> 00:10:24,856
Wonder who's
gonna win this one.
278
00:10:25,491 --> 00:10:27,152
Two, three, four...
279
00:10:27,359 --> 00:10:29,293
I'm gonna take off my coat,
if you don't mind.
280
00:10:29,662 --> 00:10:31,630
It's just a bit warm in here.
281
00:10:34,199 --> 00:10:35,632
Hello!
282
00:10:35,701 --> 00:10:37,191
No, no, no. Don't.
283
00:10:37,269 --> 00:10:39,260
People can't keep
their true natures
hidden for long,
284
00:10:39,338 --> 00:10:41,101
and this guy is
smoldering like
a tire fire.
285
00:10:41,173 --> 00:10:42,197
Testify.
286
00:10:42,274 --> 00:10:43,571
Okay, he's not
that good-Iooking.
287
00:10:43,642 --> 00:10:44,734
I don't understand
why everybody's...
288
00:10:44,810 --> 00:10:46,141
Yeah, he is that
good-Iooking. Okay?
289
00:10:46,211 --> 00:10:47,473
He's very, very handsome.
290
00:10:47,546 --> 00:10:49,946
That's a great set of
shoulders you got there.
291
00:10:50,015 --> 00:10:52,279
What is that, genetics?
292
00:10:52,351 --> 00:10:53,409
Creatine?
293
00:10:53,485 --> 00:10:54,509
294
00:10:54,586 --> 00:10:55,644
Sorry.
295
00:10:56,021 --> 00:10:58,387
Yeah.
Pull it together,
all right?
296
00:10:58,457 --> 00:11:00,254
Stop looking at him.
297
00:11:00,326 --> 00:11:01,657
I'm sorry.
298
00:11:04,229 --> 00:11:05,491
You're here to
sell me some paper.
299
00:11:05,564 --> 00:11:09,625
Well, actually,
no, Miss Van Helsing,
that's not why I'm here.
300
00:11:09,702 --> 00:11:13,536
I'm here to meet you,
see if we'd be a,
you know, good fit.
301
00:11:13,639 --> 00:11:14,697
What do you mean?
302
00:11:14,773 --> 00:11:18,334
Oh, my God!
He's making her sell to him.
303
00:11:18,811 --> 00:11:21,609
Bring our troops
Home safe and sound
304
00:11:21,680 --> 00:11:23,739
Says this little girl
305
00:11:24,550 --> 00:11:26,745
Okay. Honest
feedback time.
Oscar.
306
00:11:26,952 --> 00:11:30,149
That's pandering.
And it makes me think
you think I'm stupid.
307
00:11:30,289 --> 00:11:32,257
But do you think
it could be famous?
308
00:11:32,324 --> 00:11:33,723
Like in a car
commercial or something?
309
00:11:33,926 --> 00:11:35,257
Not really.
310
00:11:35,327 --> 00:11:37,420
It's kind of weird that
a grown man is singing
311
00:11:37,496 --> 00:11:39,555
from the point of
view of a little girl.
Mmm-hmm.
312
00:11:39,631 --> 00:11:42,122
I feel like I can see
someone ice skating to it,
313
00:11:42,201 --> 00:11:44,032
you know,
like in the Olympics.
314
00:11:44,103 --> 00:11:48,699
I don't think
they usually skate
to such bad songs.
315
00:11:49,408 --> 00:11:51,638
Rude. And not helpful.
316
00:11:51,710 --> 00:11:53,644
Well, I really,
really, really liked it.
317
00:11:54,113 --> 00:11:56,581
Well, that really
bums me out.
318
00:11:57,750 --> 00:11:58,876
You're welcome.
319
00:11:58,984 --> 00:12:01,714
Well, you should think of
this as a first date.
320
00:12:01,787 --> 00:12:04,051
And I think it's
going very well.
How about you?
321
00:12:04,289 --> 00:12:05,586
Real well.
322
00:12:05,657 --> 00:12:06,646
Uh...
323
00:12:06,792 --> 00:12:08,953
Feels more like
a third date to me.
324
00:12:09,028 --> 00:12:10,689
There you go!
325
00:12:12,197 --> 00:12:13,596
Stay...
Shut up and let me do this!
326
00:12:15,434 --> 00:12:18,926
You know,
what is with this desk
keeping us so far apart?
327
00:12:19,004 --> 00:12:20,801
I've never been a desk man.
328
00:12:20,873 --> 00:12:24,536
Always traveling on the road.
Come on... Why not? Uh?
329
00:12:25,644 --> 00:12:27,009
Well, we'll get this...
330
00:12:29,782 --> 00:12:32,250
Oh, man.
So, what's your drink?
331
00:12:32,618 --> 00:12:34,882
You a vodka man? Me, too.
332
00:12:35,521 --> 00:12:37,216
We gotta get someone else
in there right now.
333
00:12:37,289 --> 00:12:39,189
You're an exec at
Pennsylvania Solartech.
334
00:12:39,258 --> 00:12:40,384
That sounds fake.
335
00:12:40,459 --> 00:12:41,483
What do you mean?
I told you.
336
00:12:41,560 --> 00:12:43,391
You're an exec at
Stark Industries,
337
00:12:43,462 --> 00:12:44,895
a corporation you
inherited from your father.
338
00:12:44,963 --> 00:12:46,362
Will you stop?
Here's the story.
339
00:12:46,432 --> 00:12:48,161
They need Meredith
somewhere else ASAP, okay?
340
00:12:48,233 --> 00:12:49,291
Okay.
So you're taking over.
341
00:12:49,368 --> 00:12:51,063
You just gotta
get her out of there
as soon as you can.
342
00:12:51,136 --> 00:12:52,694
I can do that.
Then what?
343
00:12:52,771 --> 00:12:53,863
Then make him pitch to you.
344
00:12:53,939 --> 00:12:54,997
You gotta see what he's got.
Yes.
345
00:12:55,074 --> 00:12:56,473
Exactly. You
can do this.
Okay, and remember.
346
00:12:56,542 --> 00:12:57,736
You're not gay.
347
00:12:57,810 --> 00:12:58,970
Stop it.
It's gonna be great.
348
00:12:59,044 --> 00:13:01,979
Listen,
if anything else happens,
just roll with it.
349
00:13:04,349 --> 00:13:05,338
Meredith, I...
350
00:13:05,417 --> 00:13:06,406
Manuel.
351
00:13:06,485 --> 00:13:10,046
This is Manuel,
my cleaning man.
He doesn't speak any English.
352
00:13:12,558 --> 00:13:14,822
353
00:13:15,360 --> 00:13:17,692
Manuel, cleano el window.
354
00:13:17,963 --> 00:13:18,987
Give me the...
355
00:13:19,064 --> 00:13:20,053
Who else we got?
356
00:13:22,367 --> 00:13:25,200
Okay. You're a young
hotshot from
Stark Industries.
357
00:13:25,270 --> 00:13:27,295
You've just
bought this company.
Meredith is fired.
358
00:13:27,372 --> 00:13:29,806
It's a whole new regime.
He's gotta pitch to you now.
359
00:13:29,875 --> 00:13:31,809
Okay, Stark Industries
isn't real.
360
00:13:31,877 --> 00:13:33,037
I run Google.
361
00:13:33,112 --> 00:13:34,841
Larry and Sergey brought me...
Great. Sounds awesome.
362
00:13:34,913 --> 00:13:36,608
Just have him pitch to you.
Don't let us down.
363
00:13:36,882 --> 00:13:38,247
Will do. Won't do.
364
00:13:38,450 --> 00:13:39,678
Yeah, sure.
365
00:13:39,751 --> 00:13:41,082
You smell like a Scorpio.
366
00:13:41,320 --> 00:13:44,312
This is Esteban,
another cleaning man.
367
00:13:44,389 --> 00:13:46,687
He doesn't speak
English either.
368
00:13:46,758 --> 00:13:48,726
Esteban, el flooro.
369
00:13:56,201 --> 00:13:58,863
You know what?
I may have parked my
car in a compact space,
370
00:13:58,937 --> 00:14:00,564
and I hate when I see
others do that, so...
371
00:14:00,639 --> 00:14:02,231
Danny, I feel
a real connection to you,
372
00:14:02,307 --> 00:14:03,535
and I got to get real.
373
00:14:03,609 --> 00:14:04,598
JIM: No. No, no, no.
374
00:14:04,676 --> 00:14:05,665
MICHAEL: No, no, no, no, no!
375
00:14:05,744 --> 00:14:06,904
I'm going in! I'm going in!
Michael!
376
00:14:06,979 --> 00:14:08,412
No, Michael, stop it!
No!
377
00:14:08,480 --> 00:14:09,947
Stop, stop! Oh, my God!
378
00:14:10,015 --> 00:14:12,540
Okay. Stop it,
stop it, stop it.
379
00:14:12,618 --> 00:14:15,212
Gross! Stop it,
please. Everybody stop.
380
00:14:15,821 --> 00:14:16,810
Michael Scott.
381
00:14:16,889 --> 00:14:17,947
I said stop.
382
00:14:19,758 --> 00:14:21,020
Okay, Danny,
383
00:14:21,660 --> 00:14:22,991
this is not
Pennsylvania Solartech.
384
00:14:23,061 --> 00:14:25,086
This is Dunder
Mifflin Paper Company.
385
00:14:25,164 --> 00:14:26,495
This is Meredith Palmer.
386
00:14:26,598 --> 00:14:28,088
Pleased to meet you.
Don't... Stay away from him.
387
00:14:28,167 --> 00:14:30,795
Please, just leave.
Get out of here.
Go. Forever.
388
00:14:31,036 --> 00:14:32,060
Hmm.
389
00:14:32,137 --> 00:14:35,368
I owe you a most sincere
and humble apology.
390
00:14:35,474 --> 00:14:38,443
We were trying to watch you
to see your sales technique
391
00:14:38,510 --> 00:14:40,444
so we could stop losing
so many clients to you.
392
00:14:40,812 --> 00:14:42,006
Watch from where?
393
00:14:42,080 --> 00:14:43,604
A surveillance
room next to this one.
394
00:14:43,682 --> 00:14:46,617
Okay, so you set up
this fake company,
395
00:14:46,685 --> 00:14:49,916
then you hired
this homeless woman
to impersonate an executive,
396
00:14:50,355 --> 00:14:53,756
to spy on me
so that you could
copy my sales technique.
397
00:14:53,992 --> 00:14:55,823
Yes. And it's the sincerest
form of flattery.
398
00:14:56,428 --> 00:14:57,452
Or crazy.
399
00:14:57,729 --> 00:14:58,889
Well...
I'm gonna go.
400
00:14:58,964 --> 00:15:01,057
Okay. You know what,
it wasn't just me.
401
00:15:01,333 --> 00:15:03,392
Jim and Dwight
are behind that wall
402
00:15:03,669 --> 00:15:06,069
in the surveillance room,
and it was their plan,
as well.
403
00:15:06,138 --> 00:15:07,332
No!
No, no, no, no.
404
00:15:07,606 --> 00:15:08,834
Well, then, yeah.
All right, hey!
405
00:15:09,408 --> 00:15:10,841
Good luck, guys!
406
00:15:10,943 --> 00:15:12,342
Seems like you got
a great operation here.
407
00:15:12,411 --> 00:15:14,902
No, we don't.
Here's... Here's my point.
408
00:15:15,280 --> 00:15:18,340
Danny, listen,
you have to understand
409
00:15:18,417 --> 00:15:20,146
that we are not
normally like this.
410
00:15:20,219 --> 00:15:22,949
We just... We wanted
to know your tricks.
411
00:15:23,021 --> 00:15:24,818
What do you mean, tricks?
There's no tricks, man.
412
00:15:24,890 --> 00:15:27,415
I'm just a good salesman.
You wanna copy that?
You can't copy that!
413
00:15:27,492 --> 00:15:30,950
You are, you are. You are!
Stop it, stop it. Stop.
414
00:15:31,029 --> 00:15:32,087
You are a good salesman.
415
00:15:32,698 --> 00:15:34,563
And because of that
416
00:15:35,701 --> 00:15:36,895
I want you to work for me.
417
00:15:36,969 --> 00:15:38,869
Sure. You seem like a fun,
professional guy.
418
00:15:39,171 --> 00:15:40,195
So you will.
No!
419
00:15:40,272 --> 00:15:41,830
Hold it, hold it,
hold it, hold on.
420
00:15:41,907 --> 00:15:44,876
Hold on. Wait, wait,
wait, wait. Wait.
421
00:15:45,310 --> 00:15:47,540
Danny, I want you
to look at me.
422
00:15:47,646 --> 00:15:50,171
Do you want your
life to be better
423
00:15:50,249 --> 00:15:51,910
or to be worse or
to stay the same?
424
00:15:52,251 --> 00:15:53,718
Get out of my way.
Answer the question.
425
00:15:53,785 --> 00:15:55,252
Do you want
a better life, Danny?
426
00:15:55,320 --> 00:15:57,117
I swear to God,
I'm gonna hit you.
427
00:15:58,690 --> 00:16:00,954
I didn't mean that.
I'm sorry. I'm not...
428
00:16:01,026 --> 00:16:02,357
It's just, I'm very
upset right now.
I know.
429
00:16:02,427 --> 00:16:03,485
I'm very upset!
I know, I know.
430
00:16:03,562 --> 00:16:07,054
Do you want more freedom,
less freedom,
or to stay the same?
431
00:16:08,267 --> 00:16:10,861
More freedom.
I can give you more money.
432
00:16:11,203 --> 00:16:12,636
There's your better life.
433
00:16:12,704 --> 00:16:14,865
I can let you come
and go as you please.
434
00:16:14,940 --> 00:16:16,669
There's your freedom.
435
00:16:16,742 --> 00:16:18,141
And you already
know Dunder Mifflin
436
00:16:18,210 --> 00:16:20,371
has the best service
and the best prices.
437
00:16:20,445 --> 00:16:22,436
But you beat us anyway.
438
00:16:22,514 --> 00:16:26,610
Can you imagine
how well you would
do selling our stuff?
439
00:16:30,522 --> 00:16:32,490
Everyone, may I
have your attention?
440
00:16:32,557 --> 00:16:35,720
I would like to introduce you
to Mr. Danny Cordray.
441
00:16:36,061 --> 00:16:39,929
He's going to be
joining us as our
new traveling salesman.
442
00:16:40,132 --> 00:16:41,497
Say hello to Danny!
443
00:16:42,167 --> 00:16:43,293
me.
444
00:16:43,368 --> 00:16:45,199
Okay. You know what?
445
00:16:45,270 --> 00:16:47,170
No. No.
446
00:16:47,239 --> 00:16:50,868
This is not some sort
of construction site,
or all of Italy
447
00:16:50,942 --> 00:16:53,035
where you can just go around
treating people like meat.
448
00:16:53,312 --> 00:16:54,711
We are to respect him.
449
00:16:55,213 --> 00:16:59,081
I respect him
because he
reminds me of somebody.
450
00:16:59,151 --> 00:17:00,379
Can anybody guess who that is?
451
00:17:00,719 --> 00:17:01,708
Josh Duhamel.
452
00:17:01,787 --> 00:17:02,845
Yeah, I can see that!
453
00:17:02,954 --> 00:17:05,582
No. No. No.
Somebody in this office.
454
00:17:05,691 --> 00:17:07,750
He's like
a better-Iooking Andy.
455
00:17:08,026 --> 00:17:09,050
Thanks, Kevin.
456
00:17:09,127 --> 00:17:10,924
No. Me. Right?
457
00:17:12,130 --> 00:17:14,325
Sort of like a little,
younger version of me.
458
00:17:14,800 --> 00:17:16,927
It's hard to judge
ourselves accurately,
isn't it?
459
00:17:17,002 --> 00:17:18,060
Michael.
Yes.
460
00:17:18,136 --> 00:17:19,797
Can I talk to you
about something?
No, you may not.
461
00:17:19,871 --> 00:17:21,429
It's about this
very announcement
you just made.
462
00:17:21,506 --> 00:17:23,133
I said no.
Michael...
463
00:17:23,208 --> 00:17:24,539
Michael, I think
you really want to
talk to him.
464
00:17:24,609 --> 00:17:27,305
Okay, let's... All right,
all right. Let's talk.
465
00:17:27,379 --> 00:17:28,471
Please don't
let him leave.
Don't leave.
466
00:17:28,547 --> 00:17:29,571
Got you.
467
00:17:29,648 --> 00:17:31,013
You hired him?
468
00:17:31,083 --> 00:17:32,107
Guys, let me
ask you something.
469
00:17:32,184 --> 00:17:34,914
Do you want your life
to be better or worse
or stay the same?
470
00:17:34,986 --> 00:17:36,112
ALL: Stay the same.
471
00:17:36,188 --> 00:17:39,089
Okay. Well, get ready,
'cause it's gonna get better.
472
00:17:39,424 --> 00:17:41,984
It's not gonna get better.
He's gonna steal
all of our clients.
473
00:17:42,060 --> 00:17:43,550
No. No. Wrong.
474
00:17:43,628 --> 00:17:45,357
He would have
stolen your clients,
475
00:17:45,430 --> 00:17:47,125
but you know what?
He can't now.
476
00:17:47,199 --> 00:17:49,224
This guy used to
steal sales from us.
477
00:17:49,368 --> 00:17:51,427
Now he's going to
steal sales for us.
478
00:17:51,703 --> 00:17:53,568
Where's he gonna sit?
There's no more seats.
479
00:17:53,638 --> 00:17:55,299
He doesn't need to sit.
He's a traveling salesman.
480
00:17:55,374 --> 00:17:58,241
Look, I am not going
to exclude good people
from our staff
481
00:17:58,310 --> 00:18:00,505
simply because they
are threatening to you.
482
00:18:00,979 --> 00:18:02,378
And unless you have
a better argument
than that,
483
00:18:02,447 --> 00:18:03,778
I suggest you leave.
484
00:18:04,449 --> 00:18:05,438
Yeah.
485
00:18:06,051 --> 00:18:08,645
Where's he gonna park?
There's no more
reserved parking spots.
486
00:18:08,720 --> 00:18:09,948
Goodbye!
487
00:18:14,059 --> 00:18:15,890
Songs about truth.
Yeah.
488
00:18:15,961 --> 00:18:17,690
What's something
you really care about?
489
00:18:18,797 --> 00:18:19,923
Reverse snobbery.
490
00:18:20,098 --> 00:18:21,156
More universal.
491
00:18:21,433 --> 00:18:24,061
Sometimes I feel like
life has passed me by.
492
00:18:25,904 --> 00:18:29,305
Couldn't get
Out of bed today
493
00:18:29,908 --> 00:18:32,103
Wish the alarm clock
Would go away
494
00:18:32,177 --> 00:18:33,201
Nice!
495
00:18:33,278 --> 00:18:34,643
Holy crap.
Are you kidding me?
496
00:18:34,713 --> 00:18:36,078
You just made that...
That's amazing.
497
00:18:36,148 --> 00:18:37,206
Go ahead.
498
00:18:37,349 --> 00:18:39,681
Which me am I
Gonna be today?
499
00:18:39,751 --> 00:18:42,049
Which me am I
Gonna be today?
500
00:18:42,120 --> 00:18:44,486
I got a closet full of mes
Ha ha!
501
00:18:45,557 --> 00:18:48,458
Am I gonna be the happy me?
502
00:18:48,894 --> 00:18:50,953
Or the me that stinks?
503
00:18:51,363 --> 00:18:53,854
Oh, my gosh.
We're almost
out of time.
504
00:18:53,932 --> 00:18:55,297
How much for
another half hour?
505
00:18:55,467 --> 00:18:57,264
Don't worry about it.
506
00:18:58,136 --> 00:19:00,263
Wait. Seriously?
Yeah.
507
00:19:01,106 --> 00:19:02,971
So we're just, like,
jamming as friends?
508
00:19:03,308 --> 00:19:05,640
One, two, three, hit it.
509
00:19:05,977 --> 00:19:07,842
Closet full of mes...
510
00:19:07,979 --> 00:19:12,279
Oh, you know, funny,
your wife and I
went on a few dates.
511
00:19:13,151 --> 00:19:14,914
Did you?
Yeah, way, way, way back.
512
00:19:14,986 --> 00:19:16,317
I'm just kidding.
She told me about it.
513
00:19:16,388 --> 00:19:18,913
Good. She was not into me.
514
00:19:18,990 --> 00:19:20,389
Oh.
Obviously.
515
00:19:20,559 --> 00:19:21,856
I don't even think
she called me back.
516
00:19:22,160 --> 00:19:24,094
You snubbed her.
Dwight, please.
517
00:19:24,162 --> 00:19:27,825
Let me handle this, Jim.
Drop the act, Cordray. Okay?
518
00:19:27,899 --> 00:19:29,491
We all know that
you probably thought
519
00:19:29,568 --> 00:19:33,004
that Pam was too "meh"
or thin without being toned.
520
00:19:33,305 --> 00:19:34,363
But I wanna
tell you something.
521
00:19:34,439 --> 00:19:36,805
She is one of the plain,
hearty women of Scranton
522
00:19:36,875 --> 00:19:38,740
that make this city great.
523
00:19:38,810 --> 00:19:40,437
And so what if she
doesn't wear makeup?
524
00:19:40,512 --> 00:19:41,706
I wear makeup.
525
00:19:41,780 --> 00:19:44,180
We like her better that way!
And you steal clients,
don't you?
526
00:19:44,616 --> 00:19:45,708
Don't you?
527
00:19:45,817 --> 00:19:47,409
Okay, that's different.
528
00:19:47,486 --> 00:19:49,010
"That's different," is it?
529
00:19:49,087 --> 00:19:51,146
Okay, thief.
530
00:19:51,223 --> 00:19:54,249
You better check your
things, people. In fact,
where are my keys?
531
00:19:54,759 --> 00:19:58,195
Oh. They're in my pocket.
False alarm.
532
00:19:59,164 --> 00:20:00,256
Okay.
533
00:20:02,968 --> 00:20:04,959
So you're gonna
be working here.
534
00:20:05,937 --> 00:20:06,926
Uh...
535
00:20:07,572 --> 00:20:08,698
I mean... Yeah.
536
00:20:09,074 --> 00:20:10,598
Welcome aboard.
537
00:20:12,911 --> 00:20:14,606
Thank you.
538
00:20:14,679 --> 00:20:16,840
Hey, crazy. Um...
539
00:20:16,915 --> 00:20:19,816
So, that's it?
You're just... You're fine?
540
00:20:19,951 --> 00:20:23,216
It's after 5:00, Jim.
I'm not gonna take this home.
541
00:20:24,856 --> 00:20:25,880
Pleasure.
542
00:20:26,291 --> 00:20:27,451
Thanks.
543
00:20:27,526 --> 00:20:30,552
This morning, Danny Cordray
stole a sale from me.
So what do I do?
544
00:20:30,795 --> 00:20:32,786
I go out and I
steal Danny Cordray.
545
00:20:32,864 --> 00:20:36,027
The sale that mattered,
I made. Boom.
546
00:20:36,101 --> 00:20:37,534
Funny thing about it,
we don't even need him.
547
00:20:37,602 --> 00:20:39,797
We already have
Packer on the road.
548
00:20:39,938 --> 00:20:40,927
549
00:20:41,039 --> 00:20:43,166
Crap. I forgot about Packer.
550
00:20:45,277 --> 00:20:46,574
551
00:20:47,612 --> 00:20:49,910
Star's in her eyes,
tongue full of flies
552
00:20:49,981 --> 00:20:52,814
Would you like
to share my pad?
553
00:20:52,884 --> 00:20:56,650
Croak, croak, croak,
Bullfrog in love
554
00:20:57,622 --> 00:21:00,216
Croak, croak, croak,
Bullfrog in love
555
00:21:00,292 --> 00:21:01,418
And I gave her the croak
556
00:21:01,493 --> 00:21:02,983
That meant I love you
557
00:21:03,595 --> 00:21:06,120
I'll be your croak monsieur
558
00:21:06,197 --> 00:21:08,563
I'll be your croak madame
559
00:21:08,633 --> 00:21:10,794
Your mama might've said
That bullfrogs are dogs
560
00:21:10,869 --> 00:21:13,463
But I'm here to
Tell you that I'm a frog
561
00:21:13,538 --> 00:21:16,564
Come and sit on my log,
You little pollywog
562
00:21:16,641 --> 00:21:18,939
I find you
absolutely ribbitting!
563
00:21:19,010 --> 00:21:21,638
Croak, croak, croak,
Bullfrog in love
564
00:21:21,713 --> 00:21:24,307
Croak, croak, croak,
Bullfrog in love
565
00:21:24,382 --> 00:21:25,610
Croak
Ribbit
566
00:21:25,684 --> 00:21:27,914
Scoopty splash
567
00:21:27,986 --> 00:21:29,248
Nice.